I've Had It - Bored to Death

Episode Date: July 6, 2023

Josh Welch is back and better than ever. Jennifer, Pumps and Josh take turns sharing their grievances, most of which come back to Pumps and her lesbian arc. The three end the episode with listener sub...missions, one of which confirms Josh’s main complaint of the day… The Hot Sh*t Tour is heading to Atlanta, Philly and D.C in August! more info & tickets available at https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast Thank you to our sponsors: This episode is brought to you by JustThrive - Use promo code: HADIT for 20% your first 90 day bottle of Just Thrive probiotic or Just Calm at JustThriveHealth.com Jenni Kayne: Find your forever pieces @jennikayne and get 15% off with promo code HADIT at jennikayne.com! #jennikaynepartner SimpliSafe: Listeners get a special 20% off any SimpliSafe system when you sign up for Fast Protect Monitoring. This huge offer is for a limited time. So visit SimpliSafe.com/HADIT. Hint Water: New customers can get Hint for just $1 a bottle with free shipping, when they order 3 cases. That's 36 bottles for $36 and free shipping. Visit https://hintwater.com and use the code HADIT at checkout. BetterHelp: Discover your potential with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/hadit today to get 10% off your first month. Subscribe to our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/IveHadItPodcast Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps Special Guest: Josh Welch @joshwelch_

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 This episode of I've had it is brought to you by Just Thrive. Right now, you can save 20% off a 90 day bottle of Just Thrive probiotic or just calm at just thrivehealth.com with promo code had it. So we supposed to start the podcast. One, two, three. I'm just getting so good at that. It's unbelievable. I might be picked up with a bigger and brighter podcast
Starting point is 00:00:29 and leave you on the desk because they need me to come on and be the clapper. You know what? We might start is on the right. I hope that happens for you. Welcome to I've had it podcast. We're going to go straight into the intro because today we are gonna have a special
Starting point is 00:00:46 Thrupple episode, the most special of guests, the non-practicing Thrupple. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. And today we have my husband, Josh Welch, co-hosting with myself in the store of our show, Pumps. Yeah. And Josh, welcome.
Starting point is 00:01:03 Hello, hello, hello. It's been it's been a hot minute since I've got to appear on the now famous. I've had a podcast. Maybe infamous. Infamous. Yeah, I think we could probably go with infamous. Well, Josh, what we like to do is start out with what we've had it with. And I'm going to go first since I have the mic right now. Okay. I have a slight grievance that I'd like to air with you, pumps. It dates back to two to three weeks ago, a little bit of time ago, where you come by the office because we need to do some podcasting stuff. And then you say, I have to leave.
Starting point is 00:01:41 And I have to leave right now because there's going to be lightning outside. I look outside and much to my surprise, I don't see one lightning bolt. Let me finish. I know. I don't see one lightning belt. I do not see here one, you know, lightning thunder. I don't hear one bolt of thunder. I hear nothing.
Starting point is 00:02:03 And you're like stage five meltdown, drinking the meteorologist's cool aid. And I remind you, remember, we're on the permanent record of having it with meteorologists. Right. And you were like, you know, stage five panic mode, much to my surprise, you race out the door,
Starting point is 00:02:21 much to my surprise, the remainder of that day. I neither saw lightning, heard thunder or a raindrop. So I just wanted to inject that, that it disappoints me that you bought into the hype and to the hysteria. I had it, I had it with that on that day. I still continue to have it. We need better out of you pumps. I was a relapse of epic proportions, and I don't want that shit to happen again. Well, here's the deal. Why I was so panicked about it,
Starting point is 00:02:51 is because that was during the Women's College World Series, and they had stopped play and ordered everybody out of the stadium. During the game? Were you at the stadium yesterday? No, no, no, no, no. Were you at the stadium yesterday? No, I wasn't, but I heard that. So I thought, oh my gosh, it's so bad. What I didn't realize because the next night I went to the game and we had to
Starting point is 00:03:11 evacuate twice for no if I can reason. So I was hysterical. It was tied into my softball watching. That's why I was, I would not watch media. Let me ask you this. Let me ask you this. Would you believe that sometimes people lack deduction skills? Well, just follow the logic for me. Would you believe yes or no that people sometimes lack deduction skills? Yes. Okay. So would you agree that people that are sitting stationary in an open stadium in metal seats is a and and lots of them like thousands of them
Starting point is 00:03:48 is a greater risk than you inside my office building completely protected. Yes, but the last time it was they forecasted weather like that, I got hail all the way down when I left here because it was during hail. It wasn't a hill. It wasn't a hill warning. It was a lightning. No, I know, but I just got nervous. But it was just tied into my softball hysteria. No, I have not relapsed and started watching the local weather. Fuck, no. But yeah, I was kind of like nervous about it
Starting point is 00:04:17 because of the softball game. Because I was like, oh my gosh, if they're gonna evacuate the stadium, the weather's gonna be bad. I just didn't know they did it on the drop hat. What happened? Fuckin' nothin'. Fuckin' nothin'.
Starting point is 00:04:26 We've gone over this multiple times. What has happened to you, too? What? Since I've been gone. What in the world has happened? Are we cranky and bitchier than you remember? I mean, you've turned into a weather, half the country around you. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha She's monitoring your every move but the reaction to the weather.
Starting point is 00:04:46 I mean, it's just insanity. Maybe we've been together too much. I mean, if it was bat shit crazy in October of last year, it is triple fat. Jesus Christ. I can't defend it. I cannot defend it. Josh, what have you had it with? Okay. Defend it. I cannot defend it. Josh, what have you had it with? Okay, so I've had it with conversations
Starting point is 00:05:10 that turn awkward with new acquaintances and there's no way to get out of the conversation. And let me put it in context for you. So Jennifer and I spent a weekend with some lovely friends and I ended up, and this was at their like house. And I ended up visiting with the lady that I didn't know at all. And we've all had these social interactions
Starting point is 00:05:33 where you're kind of quarantined with a person. And it just ends up being you and the person. Right. And you didn't seek that out, but that's how it happened. And so I'm sitting there with this lady and she's maybe 10 or 15, 20 years older than me. We don't know each other, we've never met, but it's just she and I.
Starting point is 00:05:52 And so we're having this conversation and the course of the conversation is getting so awkward and there's pauses and then I'm saying something and she says something. And then she ends up saying that her husband's dead and then she corrects herself within just a few minutes and says, I don't know why I said that and that's an example and then I'm kind of looking at her. I mean, we both know the conversation has gone on way too long because we're both just now more making shit on.
Starting point is 00:06:26 We're just freeballing it. We're both just and I've been a part of conversations where I've told little white lies like someone will say, Hey, I'm from Charles in South Carolina and I'll say, well, that's a great town. I love that. I've never been there. Right. But here's the deal with this gal. Her lie is so massive because her husband is like 15 feet away from us. She knows in the course of the conversation she's got to own the lie. She's like, fuck, I can't just let this lie go by.
Starting point is 00:07:05 I've got to say, I'm full of shit. You know what I'm saying? Because there's a lot of white lies that you have in these conversations. You can just roll right past. Never been to Charleston, South Carolina, but I'm going to say, God, that's a great town to say. But my husband being dead, that's a whole nother level of shit right there. That's like fuck he's gonna come up green in a second I've just told this guy that he's dead and I've done it because this conversation is so fucking awkward
Starting point is 00:07:35 Here's the deal the fact that you're taking away Was that it was more awkward than her crazy? So the later she goes up to but it was more awkward than her crazy. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.
Starting point is 00:07:51 That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.
Starting point is 00:07:59 That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. virus. So she goes back to Josh later and is like, Hey, you should give Chattra some pumpkin. It's really good for doc to settle dogs stomach. And Josh still did a follow up at that point. He goes, Are you sure your husband's okay? So Jennifer's example, that shows you the level of our
Starting point is 00:08:21 conversation when she's telling me that my dog needs pumpkin for its tummy ache This is a complete stranger So that shows you where the conversation is feared off to but she did she came up to me and then I looked at her and Once she gave me the pumpkin Advice I said she's still doing okay Yeah, of course he's in the kitchen Yeah, she was just like brain fart because, yeah, of course, he's in the kitchen. I wish she kind of embarrassed. Yeah, she was just like brain fart.
Starting point is 00:08:47 Yeah, she's in there. A brain fart. Is that forgot to pick up milk at the grocery store? That's what, well, that was the theme of the conversation for the rest of the weekend. It was like, what's wrong? Who says, just, who has a brain fart that someone's dead? And they're not dead.
Starting point is 00:09:05 I think this is the way a lot of date line murder mysteries started. It started. And we started laughing if something happens to that guy. It's something I have to get to the police if he dies at home. And it's suspicious. No, no, I'm going to get a call from like the police department say, hey, we heard that she made a statement to you a while back about, you know, if something ever does happen to him, then the statement's
Starting point is 00:09:29 going to be highly relevant as to why she would make up the fact that he's dead. That's the best thing I ever heard. Well, and so the point here is that when those conversations, when you're in them with someone that you don't know anything about, and you all just happen to be stuck next to each other, that two things should be able to occur. Number one, you should be able to pull out a white flag and just surrender the conversation, pull it out and say, I surrender. This is over with.
Starting point is 00:10:02 There's nothing else I can contribute. Right. Or you ought to be able to just withdraw and tell the person, say, hey, I'm gonna withdraw from this conversation. Everything has been said that needs to be said. That's the end of it. This conversation is so terrible. I'm gonna call it.
Starting point is 00:10:19 That way you don't end up saying, you know, Freudian slips like, my husband said. You know, Jennifer died last month. What am I saying? don't end up saying Freudian slips like my husband said. Jennifer died last month. What am I saying? She's right over there talking to her. I don't know what's going on with me.
Starting point is 00:10:36 Anyway, I felt remiss if I didn't include that I've had it, which is the awkward long conversation. That was definitely, I would have been mad if you would have forgotten that one. Anyway, you know, Poms, I worry about you living out by yourself with all of your kids away at college and your youngest one always spend the night out with friends. And that's why I'm so excited to tell you about the latest innovation from Simply Safe Home Security. It's called the 24-7 live guard protection, and it's made possible only by SimplySafes' new smart alarm wireless indoor camera. They
Starting point is 00:11:11 monitor your house, and if somebody breaks in, the SimplySafe people start talking to them like you better get out of the house. Oh my gosh! The cops are on their way. That's amazing! I think you have got to get one of these. These new camera is also the only indoor security camera that can trigger the alarm and instantly deter intruders with a built-in siren. Right now, for I've had it podcast listeners, you get a special 20% off any simply safe system when you sign up for fast protect monitoring.
Starting point is 00:11:42 This huge offer is for a limited time, so visit simplysafe.com slash had it. when you sign up for fast, protect monitoring. This huge offer is for a limited time. So visit simply safe.com slash had it that simply safe.com slash had it. There is no safe like simply safe. This episode is brought to you by better help. You know, Pumps is therapeutic as our friendship is I have found my work with therapist. The one thing that has really helped me get better, deal with vulnerabilities, deal with insecurities, deal with marital problems, etc. Therapy really is invaluable.
Starting point is 00:12:12 If you're thinking about starting therapy, you should get better help a try. What I love about this service so much is it's entirely online. It's convenient, flexible, and suited to my schedule. All I had to do was fill out a brief questionnaire and I got matched up with a licensed therapist and I can switch it any time for no additional charge. Discover your potential with better help. Visit betterhelp.com slash had it today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help help.com slash had it. So I don't want to come here and take advantage of the I've had it.
Starting point is 00:12:47 But I can give you another one. Oh, yeah, let's hear it. So watching all of these episodes over the past few months, it's come to my attention and it needs to just be admitted and owned. Okay. And I've had it with pumps not coming clean and just admitting to being a lesbian. I totally agree. She got so worked up in the weather hysteria. Why? Because of softball. When the softball are all softball players, lesbian?
Starting point is 00:13:19 No. No. No. But a big chunk of a mark. I don't even think that's true anymore. A big chunk of the fans are, I think it's totally true. I've watched episode after episode and there's only one rational conclusion to reach. Pumps is a lesbian and as soon as we can get you on board with it, there's a huge gay
Starting point is 00:13:40 community out there, lesbian community that would embrace this. I just need you to, I just need you to say it. I just, I would have jumped ship a long time ago if I could have. That would, I mean, that's like my perfect scenario, having like a wife and doing all that, I mean, like being with a girlfriend, I'm way better at picking women than men. So, I mean, believe me, no one wants me to be a lesbian more than me. Sometimes you just, what about that what, Jareem? I mean, we me, no one wants me to be a lesbian more than me. Sometimes you just what about that wet dream? I mean, we just kind of talk about that one. I know,
Starting point is 00:14:10 but for the permanent record, you've had one erotic dream in your entire life, right? And that erotic dream was with some, I believe basketball coach or softball coach. That's a player, basketball player. Okay. I'm a good player. Basketball player, okay. I'm just saying. Female. There's an accordion exploration into this. It's very forwardion. Right.
Starting point is 00:14:32 Well, here's the deal. If I could, I would. You could. I always thought that dream, that what dream? Was it precursor? Was fishy. No pun intended, but it was fishy. And I mean no pun intended.
Starting point is 00:14:46 That's right. But I knew it was. And I think that you've, at least I've heard this phrase in recovery. Fake it till you make it. Right. I need you to just jump in there. Just jump in.
Starting point is 00:15:00 Do it. Do it. Fake it. Just fake it. See how it is. Eventually you're're gonna come out of this thing saying, you know what, this is a lot better. I think it's gonna kind of be like, oh my God. Where's this been my whole life?
Starting point is 00:15:12 This was the thing. I just think with all the religious indoctrination and all the stuff, some of that still permeates and you just think, well, I'm supposed to like men. Now, I just, and there's nothing that says that you can't occasionally have an erect penis. There's nothing that have an erect penis.
Starting point is 00:15:31 He means having me having sex with a man. Yeah, there's nothing that prevents. There's nothing that prevents her from switching things exactly right. So it doesn't have to be a hundred percent or nothing, but I just think that you need to tip toe out there at your next softball game Or the next time you're shopping for men's flip flop Whatever it is you need to just go ahead and go there just go there a hundred percent
Starting point is 00:15:58 If you take it take a leap if you see an attractive lesbian at Dick sporting goods take advantage of that opportunity Do something with it. A little tap. Excuse me. Tap, tap. I think a great place you could go. Lose. Oh, well.
Starting point is 00:16:11 Yeah. A lot of, a lot of them. To me, I mean, even think what Lose is, it's a home improvement. Lose, but even better than that, go to one of Jennifer's pickleball matches. Right. I've met all the pickleball friends. I find them all. They're all, they're all lesbians. They're lovely and fabulous. Yeah, I just don't have any sexual chemistry. Well,
Starting point is 00:16:29 you did in that one dream. That's all I'm saying on Ambien. I here's the deal. I don't care. No one would want to be a lesbian on the planet more than me. I think we could all agree on that. I'd be dying to do it if I could. I'm just going to say here's an instance that Kylie and I've talked about multiple it if I could. I'm just going to say here's an instance that Kylie and I've talked about multiple times and Josh, I want to bring you in on this and get feedback. Okay. We received some vibrators for free, like from this company that sent us, like, here's vibrators for you. We like your podcast, right? Right. So I take a vibrator, pumps, takes a vibrator, Kylie takes a vibrator.
Starting point is 00:17:06 About a week later, pumps tells us she went to the lake with her girlfriends and that they all talked prior to going to the lake that pumps would bring the vibrator. Because I couldn't figure out how to turn it on. Here's the deal. So Kylie's looking at me and she's like, pumps brought the vibrator to the girls trip and everybody agreed about it and pumps was the vibrator bring her. Pumps starts walking down the stairs. Kylie, who is a confirmed lesbian and proud of it and doesn't have to talk about dreams and solve all these issues out. Okay, she has pride. All right. Kylie looks directly at me and she says, I just
Starting point is 00:17:45 think that whole thing sounds gay. And I just don't know where the liest. I mean, when I go on girls trips, I don't have conversations with my friends about who's bringing the vibrator. No, it wasn't like that. I was telling one of the girls that I couldn't, I got this new vibrator because they'd heard me talking about on the podcast so they were asking me because we do share vibrator tips on occasion. Sounds good.
Starting point is 00:18:10 And, Shea, hang on, share vibrator. Like if somebody gets a great vibrator, it's like, oh my God, I found the best vibrator. Like, do you talk about the model? Like, yeah, order this. Like, yeah, order this. Really.
Starting point is 00:18:21 Yeah. All of it, all, I'm just saying there is a shit ton of corroborating evidence. And Pumps, you are surrounded by love, by open-minded people. And we, you know, we can put this case together multiple times. The listeners are really into this. And I'm just saying, don't close the door. That's what happens to homosexuals to get the closet door slammed on them.
Starting point is 00:18:49 And you can just take your hand off the handle and let Josh, myself, Kylie, the listeners, just gently start opening it, dip your toes in a little bit. And instead of free the nib, this is gonna be, let's free pops. Okay, let's free her from... How about free the clip? Ah!
Starting point is 00:19:11 We've gotta help you. Pumps is an exile and we've gotta get you out. Out, to reach my full lesbian capacity. Man with flops, softball games. Hate shopping. Hate shopping. Pup gas for you. That's it.
Starting point is 00:19:26 So that's that's anyway, that's my hope. Having been an innocent observer of the podcast. I think that's what needs to come out. I keep the episode that comes out. I keep thinking this is going to be the episode that pump says, you know what? I'm gay. I like vaginas.
Starting point is 00:19:42 I don't like penises. I like vaginas. And that I sit there and I wait for it and it never drops. But we hear all of these suggestions about what dreams, women's softball players, franticying about the post-poment of a softball game. Oh, that was just, it was his sterical beyond. It was almost like she hadn't even participated in the episode that we had where we'd had it with meteorologist. I was just like I hope that hope was when I slated incident about the weather surrounding yeah you and women All I'm saying well, let's just say when you do come out when I do come out you'll come out on the I've had it podcast first place
Starting point is 00:20:22 I'll be perfect. That's all I can ask for. First place. I've got that petty grievance off my checklist. We can move on to the next. Okay, what is the next? What have you ladies had it with? I'll tell you what I've had it with, and it seems petty, but I've had it with this fucking Apple Watch.
Starting point is 00:20:40 And I know I'm the problem. I know we've talked about Apple Watches before, but I find that right before I go to bed at nine o'clock at night, if I'm like 30 calories away from my goal, if like my watch tells me that, I'm fucking planking at nine o'clock at night in my bedroom for these fucking 30 calories. And then last night I got furious
Starting point is 00:21:05 because I like doubled my calories, doubled my workout, my stand circle didn't go away. I mean, I didn't stand enough at one point during the day. I missed a minute of standing in one hour. So my whole fucking ring doesn't go up close. And I'm just like, I am like an addiction. I mean, what is it? It's, it does watch us are bossy.
Starting point is 00:21:28 It makes you feel like a loser. Yes. It makes you feel like you haven't done enough for your body, which is a good thing because I think people are too sedentary, but I like you. I find myself it's like, stand right now, but I'm in a movie theater. So I'm like moving my hand probably,
Starting point is 00:21:41 somebody probably thinks I'm masturbating because I'm shaking my hand like this, trying to get the fucking credit for it. Right. Because I'm like, I'm not going to be able to stand up for two hours. Those are two stand credits that I'm going to get denied. And it's like you're cheating for your watch. You know, I mean, it just brings the whole, it just makes me think like, I'm going backwards in life that I can't just say well I was working yesterday I couldn't see
Starting point is 00:22:06 that. It becomes more of a new sense. It becomes more of a work to have the watch. It's in my head. It's just I'm in my head with my watch. So I've had it with that about the watch. My second thing about the watch is I'll just it's happened in the podcast before. We're sitting here talking. I'm not looking at my watch. I'm not doing anything with my watch and my watch just starts talking out of nowhere. Oh, mind is that all the time too? Like I'm in the middle of a meeting, I don't know. I don't know. And you know, Apple's now about to launch these goggles.
Starting point is 00:22:34 They're like $3,500 and I'm like, there's no if I can way I'm getting the goggles, there's no if I can way and that's how it was about the watch at first. I was. At some point two or three years now, we're all gonna be walking around with these fucking goofy goggles. What's the purpose of the goggles? first. I was. It's some point two or three years now. We're all going to be walking around with these fucking goofy goggles.
Starting point is 00:22:46 What's the purpose of the goggles? I don't know. It's like you can literally like you see the people and you can see everything. They're like just touching air and moving stuff around and it's like a watch, but you see through it. Yeah, it's coming. It's coming for us. No, I know, but that I don't know. I mean the what? Yeah. So my I've had it is with myself that I can't be the adult in the ring when it comes to me in my watch. It's hard. It's hard. Like the watch owns the person. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:11 So that's my. Okay, Josh, now we're going to hear from a voice memo from one of our listeners, Aaron. Perfect. I have absolutely had it with the term, it must be nice. I get that a lot from people that have children. My wife and I have two dogs, a booby-a and a Westie and a cat, a British short hair. Those are our children. So when we go out and do things, or we buy nice vehicles, or we go on nice vacations, oh, it must be nice. You know what, Susan? It is fucking nice. It is nice to go and do whatever we want. When we want
Starting point is 00:23:43 to do it, it is not my fault that your husband doesn't know how to pull out. So that's why you have seven children now. So don't come at me when I want to buy some nice clothes or go on a nice vacation. Don't fuck and tell me, most be nice. I have had it. My favorite part about that whole thing is how he gives the description of each animal. Yes, he's got a Westie, he's got a cat, it's a British short hair. Well, I can just hear the, you can hear the tone in which the person says it must be nice.
Starting point is 00:24:14 Like how many times have you heard that in your life, it must be nice. And you're just thinking when that comes out of their mouth, you're like, fuck you. Fuck you. Yeah. When they say it must be nice, it's almost like you want to go push your heart. If you didn't have all those red rats, you could have nice things too. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:24:28 But I do think that single people, or not single people, but childless couples or single people without children, everybody assumes it's just, oh my God, their life must be so much better. Well, guess what? You used to have that life. You chose not to have that life by having kids. That's right.
Starting point is 00:24:45 But now you can't be jealous of somebody that has chosen not to and has a fabulous life going on trips with nice stuff. And starts it out by saying it must be nice. It must be nice. Yeah, that's a like go find yourself. And step punch in the face when you say that. Well, I also think that there's this whole narrative that we need to do away with. And it is that putting pressure on young couples,
Starting point is 00:25:05 when are you getting married? When are you having kids? When are you getting married? When are you having kids? Like half of all marriages in a divorce, maybe more. And then there's always this pressure on young couples like these people, they like their cats, they like their dogs like buying new cars. When are you having a kid? When are you having a kid, especially where we live in the Bible belt, it's all of this, you know, what they would call traditional values. And it's like, if a woman doesn't want to have a kid or a couple wants to be childless,
Starting point is 00:25:33 let's normalize that. You know, like, if they don't want to take a crack at it because they've been able to use their deduction skills and see that it's pretty fucking rough, good for them. Right, now I have a lot of admiration for the younger like millennial ginsiers that are like, I don't know that I have to get married. I'm not sure I want to be a mother. Right. Because I feel like our generation was, you had to be married, you had to be a mother. And so I just have a lot of admiration because I
Starting point is 00:26:01 do know women that say, you know, I'm just not maternal. I've never wanted a baby. Right. That's just not for me. And, you know, I enjoy my career. I enjoy traveling. And I think you're a fucking boss bitch. Totally. Because you're not going with the flow and the stereotypes.
Starting point is 00:26:17 And she probably does come under scrutiny for that. Right. But now, when somebody says we met someone pretty recently that was like, you know, I'm just not maternal. Just never has been my thing. And I thought, you fucking kill it. Rock out. Plus, there's the narrative that people want to diminish that.
Starting point is 00:26:32 And I don't think that one is greater than the other. No, I think that if somebody wants to have kids, great, but I'll tell you what, I know a lot of women that are older than us, that are empty nesters, and their whole identity is either being a mom or being some successful man's wife. So then when the kids are gone, they have no personal identity for themselves. And they're over their second on Xanaxis and boozing up the whole time
Starting point is 00:26:58 because they have no purpose. And so I think that there is this either or option that women and men get about adulthood is bullshit and I think delaying having a family delaying getting married or not opting into that at all is perfectly normal and admirable. Absolutely. And there's no one better than the other. I completely agree. It's just whatever's better for you.
Starting point is 00:27:25 You know, Pumps, now that we're in the throes of summer, I think we could all use a little wardrobe update. And I'm so happy that I've discovered Ginny Kane. It embodies the California dream for fashion. Have you seen their site? Yes, I love it. Even though I don't like to shop, I love my pieces from Ginny Kane.
Starting point is 00:27:42 No matter the season, their dresses are the it item and will get you compliments. I have this amazing cashmere cardigan from Ginny Kane. And even though we're in the throes of summer, I'm always freezing when I go inside a movie theater or a restaurant or a shopping mall. And I just throw in my little Ginny Kane cashmere and I lick adorable and I'm warm
Starting point is 00:28:01 and I can wear it all four seasons. To find your forever pieces at Ginnycane.com, our listeners get 15% off your first order when you use code had it at checkout. That's 15% off your first order, J-E-N-I-K-A-Y-N-E.com promo code had it. Pumps, there's absolutely no denying what believers we are in just thrive products. Absolutely none. The gut health is so much better since we've been taking their probiotics. Our dogs take their probiotics because this company not only cares about your and my cat, but the guts of our animals. But what I love so much about just thrive. Are there just calm products, which are also all natural psychobiotics?
Starting point is 00:28:49 And there is no question on the planet that we have a psycho-lean. Yes. We are definitely the target audience. What I love about just calm is it supports mood, maintains cortisol levels, helps with stress and sleep and overall calmness. Listener, right now you can save 20% off a 90-day bottle of just thrive probiotic or just calm at justthrivehealth.com with promo code HADIT. That's like getting a month free all with a bottom of the bottle guarantee. You know, Pem is virtually every doctor will tell you that if you want to get healthy,
Starting point is 00:29:26 you've got to quit the sugary drinks. Yes, I'm aware because you tell me that all the time. Because I want you to be healthy because I love you, but thankfully, we've discovered hemp water and we cannot get enough of it because water is so tasteless and boring, but not hemp water. They've got watermelon. They've got blueberry. And it's just this tiny little hint with no calories whatsoever. I'm drinking a ton less tea since I've discovered hemp water. Hint is great for everyone in the family. Kids, teens, men, women, healthy people, people trying to get healthy. New moms, pregnant women, women trying to get pregnant in short, Hint Water is good for humans. You can find Hint Water at retail stores like Walmart, Target, Kroger, or have it delivered direct to your front door from
Starting point is 00:30:12 HintWater.com. New customers can get Hint for just a dollar a bottle with free shipping when they order three cases. That's 36 bottles for $36 and free shipping. Just use the code hat it to check out. So now we're gonna hear from Brandy. I have fucking had it with Angie Pumps Sullivan. Will she want she holding our breath,
Starting point is 00:30:41 trying to figure out what she's gonna do. She gonna dip her little toe and then keep her toe to her big toe. Any of it into the latent life lesbian club. Her foot. We just need to know, Pomp's, just do it or don't. Quit giving us all blue beans, which is the lesbian blue ball.
Starting point is 00:31:00 And just do it. Just do it. I couldn't agree with Brandy Moore. Boy, this was the perfect timing based on what we just talked about. I don't think that's by coincidence either. I think there are a lot of Brandy's out there that are asking the very same question that we're trying to address that we're trying to help. Okay, I promise 100%. If I dip my toe in, I will absolutely not be a secret about it. You have to report immediately. I wouldn't report to me, but I also my toe in, I will absolutely not be a secret about it. You have to report immediately. I wouldn't report to me, but I also need to say, I have no intention of doing that.
Starting point is 00:31:31 Well, you might not, but your subconscious does. Right, so, but I will not keep it a secret. I will not drag it out. We'll have an emergency podcast. Well, and you've, you've, you know, been with a guy before where you didn't really enjoy the experience. Just try it with a woman. Just fake it.
Starting point is 00:31:50 Like you've done the same thing with a man before. So, Brandy is all of us. There's no mistake about that. She is all of us. I love that. Brandy, you'll be the first tonight after Josh. Okay, next Josh and pumps. We're gonna hear from Kristen. Hey Jen, aka Jessica and pumps. How you guys doing? I love your show. I watch it every week. Listen to it. It's fantastic. Let me tell you what I've had it with today
Starting point is 00:32:22 and pretty much every day. People, adults, especially who call their dads daddy and who kiss their parents on the lips. It makes me physically ill. My girlfriend is an offender of this. She calls her dad daddy. She has her dad's name as daddy and her phone. I make kind of her daily on the regular. It literally just makes me ill. Let me let me know you guys think about it.
Starting point is 00:32:54 Kristen, you are 1,000% correct about this. Growing up in the South, I called my dad daddy. Growing up, it's a very southern thing. And it wasn't until I hit my 20s or so, I was like, this feels odd. Like, I'm a woman now, and I shouldn't be calling my dad daddy. And I switch, and now I call him dad, because that is just the way it evolves.
Starting point is 00:33:21 But I would argue, Kristen, a lot of these girls that are still calling their dads, daddy potentially could have some daddy issues. And so I hope everything's okay with you and your girlfriend, Kristen, because I think it's a little red flag city. Well, I just am getting go on record
Starting point is 00:33:40 that I am an offender. I call my dad daddy still. You're stepdad? Yeah, in my real dad, I call them both daddy. You call your stepdad daddy? Yeah. Oh, he's been my stepdad since I was five. Still daddy.
Starting point is 00:33:54 Daddy. Not big daddy or baby, but just daddy. Wow. Yeah. And I call my mom her first name. Well, the daddy thing is, it does, it's a little cringe worthy. It's very cringey to me when I see women,
Starting point is 00:34:10 grown women calling their dads daddy. It's like, it's almost like subservient life. It's creepy. You're daddy. Yeah, I just always have. I also have to say that my mom is a big kisser on the lipser and my kids just will have no part of it. So we've kind of gone away from that,
Starting point is 00:34:28 but that's how they, that's how I would say probably up until my 20s or stuff. Okay, let's hear from our last caller named Tash. But I've had it with friends who you've known for so long, like 15 years, they get new friends and they start bullshitting about what kind of person they are. Like, oh, I have this friend who has these new friends and she posted a glass of red wine on Instagram story because she had a game tonight with her fucking friends and I know that's fucking bullshit because this unseasoned piece of fucking chicken does not drink red wine. I have seen her gag at drinking a glass of fucking Pepsi Max or some heat. She does not drink red wine. She's only trying
Starting point is 00:35:13 to impress these new friends she's got. I have known this can't since she was 12 years old. She doesn't drink red wine. She's full of shit. She just wants to impress these fucking idiots. I have had it with her and I'm fucking gonna cut off the con because she's so fucking annoying. So when we say that's New Zealand, Australia. What do you love? Yeah, I love the accent. And con, I mean, just over and over. I think it's beautiful. Yes.
Starting point is 00:35:47 I mean, she uses it beautifully. Here's another word that we don't use that they use in the UK and possibly Australia, New Zealand. Wanker. Yeah, that's a good one too. It's a great one. But let's get back to what she's talking about. Yeah. Which is the reinvention of yourself when you meet new friends. New friend group, you can be anybody you want to be. Yep. It's like you've got a full blown chance of bullshitting a new audience. Right.
Starting point is 00:36:18 And you take full advantage of it. Right, totally. It would be like, you know, it'd be like Jennifer coming up and I'm talking to some dude and I'm sharing with him how I enjoy reading philosophy. Right, right. And in my spare time, like, you know, and Jennifer's just going, that is so much painful bullshit. Right. No, yes. I think that's probably a huge problem. When you think I would think so. And you know, she's been in the trenches with the brand. Right. Like, you know, Thick you know thicker than I'm sure seen horrible times now she's
Starting point is 00:36:49 having to see the whole wine glass sophisticate bull shit right now she's class not asked yeah right and she's probably been in the war zone with this brand before you know taking bowl held her hair while she's puking her guess that kind of thing yeah divorces you know cheating whatever you know she's puking her guests at. Exactly. Exactly. Divorces, cheating, whatever. Right. She's been there for her to see the wine glass saloon. That's the true.
Starting point is 00:37:12 With their new group of friends, I'm pissed off too. I think it's total bullshit. Right. And the facade always cracks. You are who you are, no matter what. Yeah, it totally cracks. But I bring a unique perspective on this because normally I'm the bullshitter. Right.
Starting point is 00:37:28 Normally, I'm reinventing myself to someone. So I know what it's like and I support her. I support her 100%. Like your longest friend, your longest serving friend knows you the best. So like, and when Jennifer, like, it makes me furious, but Jennifer knows what I'm going to do before I know what I'm going to do. So for then for me to come off and be like, oh my gosh, you know, I'm just a love all the designer brands. I shop exclusively at Dol J. Gabbana. And you know, I mean, she would just be like, fucking, what is wrong with you?
Starting point is 00:38:02 Yeah. But if you're going to be full of shit like that, at least own it. Like I do that with Jennifer. Like I try to add concern about OU sports in front of other people, but then I'll go to Jennifer and go, you know, I don't really give a fuck about OU sports. I love the conversation. I really love it when they lose. So I have to, I own it. Like I don't really, and so if you're gonna do that,
Starting point is 00:38:25 if your friend's gonna do that with a wine glass and all that stuff, she needs to side text you and say, I realize I'm full shit, but I'm just gonna go for it anyway. Right. No, I agree with that. That's my take on it. Like, you're gonna see on Instagram that I'm shopping at Gucci, and you're gonna know that I'm in Poster Syndrome.
Starting point is 00:38:43 I mean, I don't you just try to like, I mean, our biggest message is just own your shit. Just don't you go in through a stage of reinvention, you know, like Madonna did that. Remember when she married that British guy and she moved to the UK and she started trying to trot out at UK accent. If you're going through a phase like that at mid-life
Starting point is 00:39:01 or whatever and you wanna try to reinvent yourself and maybe be a better version of your self, just try it on. That's fine, but I totally relate to the voice memo, lady, because when you know somebody so well, it would be like me, full blown at the softball game. Right. Calling the softball players by their first names,
Starting point is 00:39:23 you know, with face pain on, going bananas, it's just never going to happen. Right. It's just not you. That's a good example. Or pumps acting like she's straight. Is a good example of just we know it's bullshit. Like we've been in the trenches.
Starting point is 00:39:39 Deep down. We've been in the trenches. When your paintings have gotten wet over women softball dreams, we know those things. 2015, 2016. So, you know, again, all roads lead back to pumps being a lesbian. This year isn't she. She is. And there's no to be continued about this bullshit either. It's not to be continued. She's a lesbian. You can call me a lesbian. I don't care. It's a badge of honor. I would be thrilled. Believe me. I would have done it a long time ago. Okay. Well, I want to try to steal your wife. If I would have been a lesbian. That's right. So probably worked out better for you. I will, whether it's
Starting point is 00:40:20 next Tuesday or next Thursday, I will remain in front of my television, watching the YouTube channel to see as this the episode where Pumps comes out and says, I am a lesbian. All right, listener, thank you so much for joining us. Thanks to Josh for coming. Thank you. Please give us a five star review on all the platforms, follow us on Twitter, Instagram,
Starting point is 00:40:44 take to follow us on social media and please send a voice memo to Instagram and we will see you next Tuesday. Thank you, thank you. Thank you. What I've had up there, what's your turn? I'm on it, what's that? Hey, all, it's Savannah, Chrisley.
Starting point is 00:41:00 And I've got a new podcast titled Unlocked. We're creating a space for people to truly be vulnerable. You're used to seeing me having to have this picture perfect bow on the life that I live and frankly, that's not who I am. I'm a little wild, I'm a little crazy and I love really, really hard. I really hope that you'll join me every Tuesday as I bring on friends, family, and some guests that I'm pretty sure you're gonna recognize. Listen and follow Unlocked Now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube, or your
Starting point is 00:41:36 favorite podcast app. you

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