I've Had It - Cankles-in-Chief

Episode Date: August 26, 2025

Kim Davis is ugly, Trump sucks, and Jared is a pervert.Order our new book, join our Substack, and more by clicking here: https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast.Thank you to our sponsors:This episode is brought to you by Booking.com: Find exactly what you’re booking for on Booking.com, Booking.YEAH!Earth Breeze: Right now, you can get 40% off with your subscription at https://earthbreeze.com/hadit.Pretty Litter: Right now save 20% on your FIRST order and get a free cat toy at https://PrettyLitter.com/hadit. Progressive: Give Progressive a try after this episode at https://Progressive.comFollow Us:I've Had It Podcast: @IvehaditpodcastJennifer Welch: @mizzwelchAngie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumpsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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booking dot yeah So we're supposed to start the podcast Ready, one, two, three. Patriots, gay triots, they triots, black trots, brown triots. Welcome to America's top DEI podcast pumps. What have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with

is people's entitlement across the board. Specifically in this instance, I am talking about the person that is entitled that they sit down to pee or poop they take the very last bit of the toilet paper they do not restock to me that is the height of entitlement so you don't think about the person coming after you that's going to sit down and not realize there was no toilet paper until it's too late and because my children have been home this summer that has happened to me on more than one occasion that's the worst that is the absolute worst I mean I've been known to

if I'm in a bathroom that is not my own. Like if I was in your powder bathroom and I noticed that the toilet paper was even under. Oh, for sure. Instead of over, because I think toilet paper should roll over, I go ahead and just take the initiative

and switch it myself. I do too. Everywhere I go. As a good guest and as a good bathroom visitor, I take the initiative to do that. Now, if you were running even low, I'm talking maybe, you know, minus 20 squares,

I would go ahead and flag it to the hostess. That's I need to flag an issue in the powder bathroom, we're minus 20 squares on that role. Would you like for me to go ahead and replace it? Or would you like for me to put a backup in there for the next user? And this is a problem that's happening all across the country. Yeah. It happens all the time. And I'm just always like, how can you sit there? Like, I'm so serious about it. How can you sit there and not give a shit about the person that sits down next? I mean, I don't know. Is it entitlement? Is it assholery. I don't know what it is, but I don't like it, and I've had it. I'm 100% with you on

this. I don't like it. I have to tell you and the listener what my husband does. He likes to take the toilet paper off of the holder. I've seen him do this. And then he likes to have it so he can, like, it's like a two-handed wrap thing. And then instead of replacing it back on the holder, he'll just put it on the ground. Or he puts it. like our toilet paper holders have a little ledge on them at the top or you can put a cell phone or a candle. He'll put it on top of that instead of putting it back on the holder. And I mean, these are the things that like, these are the things that can really ruin marriages. Yeah. You know, you fall in love and then it's great. And then you start going into the disappointment

stage. Right. Of relationships. And this has been a very disappointing component, despite the five rehab stints. This is, I'd say, top three. Toilet paper etiquette. I mean, we have like, you know, strung out on pills and then toilet paper etiquette. And this is just, I mean, it's right up there. Yeah. And he doesn't, he's done that at my house because I've walked into my bathroom after he's been there. And I'm like, what's the deal with the toilet paper being on the floor? It's just put it over the finish line. If you want to take it off the roller, that's your business. Nobody gives a shit. Right. Put it back where you found it, Josh. Motherfucker. Oh my God. Okay. Let me tell everybody what I've had it with. So everybody knows that I play tennis every single day. And it is a way for me to get cardio, get exercise, and be the athlete that I want to be. And so I train every day with about five days a week with a guy named Jeff. And Jeff and I play five sets to 10. Okay. So we play five different sets.

Okay, got it, got it. And Jeff, obviously, being the pro, is a lot better than me. And he gets it to where, you know, if I lose, it's because of unforced errors that I've made. Okay. Where I have made errors. And I have not beaten Jeff in our five set, I would say in a month. and we have had fifth set

super set tie breaks where you have to win by two I would say probably the last six times that we've played I have had

30 match points oh no 30 that he's teed up for me I would like to say that I earned but I mean

I earned to get to the match point with an assist I can't take it over the finish line I am in a slump

I am hitting the net I am hitting them out I am hitting the back wall. It is, it makes me so fucking mad. You know when you see tennis players take their rackets and just bang, bang, bang, bang, bang them, bang them, bang them on the concrete. And you think, God, they're really losing it. I get it because I want to take my racket. And mind you, Jeff is a helper here.

Right. But I'm angry at him. You're mad at him? For me. For my shortcomings. Right. For my athletic shortcomings. I want to take my racket and just beat the ever-living shes.

shit out of Jeff. But I will tell you, Jeff smug sometimes. Like, he'll announce to everybody when he's up, like, 5-0. He'll go, I'm up 5-0. Let's go, Hefe. Well, since you guys do talk shit out of me, yeah. Does he talk shit on you on these match points? Yes. Well, actually, yesterday's match point that I lost, he knew. Right. He knew you would explode. Usually he'll, like, he does a fist bump, bounce up to God thing on me. And he, like, you know, calls for the fans. And I'm. just like, God, I hate Jeff. And yesterday he knew, because I walked to the net, and he goes, you had like four match

points, Jennifer. I mean, it should have been over. And I'm like, do you want a lemon and some salt to sprinkle on my wounds? Hefe, is that what we want to do here? You know, of course, he bust out laughing. He was actually kind of compassionate. But I always say to Jeff, like when he's trolling me, I'll scream at the tennis center at the top of my lines.

Nobody likes Jeff. I interviewed everybody in this entire tennis club and not one single person likes Jeff. Everybody hates Jeff. Actually, he's so much fun. And I love the therapy plus exercise that I get from tennis. But I'm telling you, I'm in a slump. I mean, it's, and then, you know, the U.S. Open is on its way. And, you know, I'm going to go to that.

And when I watch them play, I think, God, yeah, that's me. It's so not. I'm so close. I'm not even remotely. I'm not even remotely because I'm going through a very humbling time in my tennis career. You know what I've noticed about your post-tennis aura? Yeah. What is it?

If it's a win, it's a big win, you played great. It is unicorns and rainbows. I'm a better person. Hearts coming straight out of your ass. 100%. But I can tell when you walk in immediately just by the facial expression. And it's just your daubbers in the dirt. hurt. I'm in a slump. I mean, to have like cancels McTacocco tits as the president and then all of this

training and working that I've been doing and I've had 500 match points that I can't take over the finish line, I'm blaming the aforementioned canckels McTacotits for fucking with my tennis because we should be on here talking about petty grievances. Right. And instead we have to talk about this fat, fascist fuck who's really, ruining everything for everybody, even his own supporters and less like the 0.01%. Those are the only people. But even they have to go humiliate themselves in the Oval Office doing show and tell trophy presentations. Who's winning here? The only person that's winning is Trump. And Melania's not winning. She still has to fuck him. And you know he can't get it up. I was going to say, I have told, I've explained by the look of those cancels. There's zero chance his dick is getting blood. It's just zero. Roe Chants. So she, no one's more thrilled with his diagnosis than Melania. Yeah. All right. Anyway, Pumps is correct. So if I've seemed cranky the last few episodes, it's not you, listener. It's the tennis and the failed attempt to score on match point to take Jeff down. But you know what? I have another match today. So we'll see if I'll keep you guys posted. Welcome to I've had it. I'm Jennifer, a failed tennis player. I'm Angie, the HBIC, and that stands for Beaver. Yeah. All right. Kylie. Jen, if I may, I just don't think one person can be great at everything. And I think you just had to have

one flaw. I just threw up in my mouth. The suck up is so gross, just for the record. If you talk to Fox News and MAGA, God, they think I have a lot of flaws. okay the stuff I consider the source would be what I would think I do I do um I would like to take my tennis racket just to the parking lot of Fox News just be a complete unhinged nut fuck you fuck you fuck you that's what I told my neighbor about the guy that's not returning my call about my gate clickers I said here's the deal I'm gonna be the fucking crazy liberal and I'm gonna go into the homeowners meeting and I'm gonna start turning tables over I'm gonna start throwing shit I'm gonna start ripping my clothes off, and they're all going to say, yeah, you know, she's a liberal. That's what happens. Let me ask you this. Are you going to go to the homeowners meeting? Well, when the next time I see a sign, I'm going to go, because I have like a whole folder of the times I've called. Can I go? Email. Yeah. Oh, my God. We could do a twofer. You could get on the side of a table. I could get on.

No, I just want to be the cinematographer. Yeah. Throwing a fit. I just, I want to get like, I want to get you going Karen. Yeah. I'm going to like raise my hand. And I'm going to be like, on this day, this day, I'm going to pull full. Like, I'm being ignored. I think it's discrimination because I'm a woman. I think it's discrimination because I'm a liberal. I think it's discrimination because I don't know. I'll think of something.

I'm just going to be a fucking nut. And so my neighbor who knows the homeowner person that's ignoring me, he's going to tell him. He's trying to make that be avoided that scene. But I'm kind of honestly, I kind of want to do it. it. I kind of want to. I just want to go fucking crazy. Just stir it up out in the suburbs. Yeah. I mean, I'm going to take a whole thing of like bananas and start throwing it. Okay. All right. Kylie, what's next? I have a perfect review to bring up now. Okay. It's one star and it's titled

Pumps is MAGA from Julie and she says we need to address the elephant in the room here. There's an overwhelming amount of evidence pointing towards Pumps being MAGA and it needs to be called out. She texts and drives. She's a bad pet owner. She shops at Walmart. She's rude to flight attendants. And of course, she owns a Stanley Cup. I don't know Jessica. Our centrist queen can, I don't know how Jessica, our centrist queen, can stand to be around

all of her MAGA energy all the time. What does she have to say for herself? That is fantastic. I love that. I hate that it was a one star, but she had to get it on. So I'm all in on it. All in. Yeah.

I mean, you know, here's the thing. Here's the thing about pumps, you guys. she used to be this. You used to be, not necessarily Maga. But I was a registered Republican forever. And even when I voted Democrat, I didn't change my deal until like. When she says deal, she means voter registration. Yeah.

Like a year ago or two years ago. A real ID. I remember when Trump first won, I called Angie. And I was freaking out, like freaking out. She poo-pooed me, dismissed me. I thought it was no big deal at all. Oh, you'll get over it. That's ridiculous.

See, I hadn't paid any attention, though. I was completely disjointed. It wasn't until all the crazy tweets that I got interested. Yeah. Honest to God. And then I turned her on to Midas Touch. Yes. And I was like, hey, I'm following these guys on Instagram.

Midas Touch. And this is probably around like maybe the end of 2019, beginning of 2020, somewhere in there. before we knew them, before we even thought about having the podcast. And I said, you need to check out their channel. And so then she starts free-basing it. And then, of course, as you know, Ben My Saylis became her algorithm boyfriend. But yeah, sometimes here's the thing. Sometimes maybe there's some MAGA residue from the upbringing.

Here's the deal. I was never MAGA, obviously, because I was out of that before. You were a George W. Busher. I remember that. I voted for him once. I know that. I remember that. But I just want to tell you, like, I come from hardcore MAGA. Like, they have graciously stopped Fox News when I walk through the door. But it is MAGA central, my lineage. Now, not my age group. Like my, what was that, generation or whatever, we're not MAGA. Well, your brother is. Yeah, my brother is.

Yeah. But because he's Mr. Gun Boy. He has more guns than half the universe. Which is hilarious too, but because he lives at home as a grown adult. And that's always the big rub from conservatives that liberals live at home. But I will say this is what I think you're poor. Your story is so important and so helpful because you were in the Death Star. You were raised and a script was written for you.

Your autonomy and your agency was removed from you and you dutifully went along with that script as a good daughter, as a good little Christian girl and voted the way your parents wanted you to vote, went to the schools your parents wanted you to go to. There was a little bit of rebellion when you wanted to go to law school. Can you imagine her parents didn't want her to go to law school? My mom wanted me to be a teacher because that is a good helping career.

And, but I think your story is so important because I think it's happening to hundreds of thousands of American women across the country right now. I think you being able, for people to be able to see, I was all up in that megachurch, Bible study shit. And, you know, I voted Republican because my dad and my husband told me to, but this is not, this does not seem like a party that's for women. You start critically thinking. I think your story is one of the most helpful stories online right now because when she says

her family is MAGA, you guys, I'm talking how many guns are in their house? Hundreds. Now that my brother moved in, I couldn't even tell you. I would say at least 25 minimum. I mean, I'm just telling you guys, it is as hardcore MAGA as you can get. My mother wore 80. Her COVID mask said Trump 2020. But here's what I love about pumps, you guys. Pumps, COVID mask was BLM, Black Lives Matter.

And when she started deprogramming herself, I remember her kids went to this crazy-ass Christian school, anti-gay hate academy. And they were in it when she realized, oh, fuck, what have I done? And they already had their friends. But my son was playing her son in basketball. And so we decided we were going to move. meet at the gym to watch our sons play each other. And so she had always been my Republican, you know, megachurch Christian friend. And I noticed that she's like she's watching Midas Touch and all this stuff.

So I go to meet her at the gym and she has this Black Lives Matter mask, COVID mask on in front of all these white, crusty, racist. And I know for a fact, two parents on your son's basket. football team. I've heard them say horrific racist shit. Horrific. So very, very white supremacist school. And God, I fucking love pumps. She had on a Black Lives Matter mask and I, you could have blown me over with a feather at the evolution of her. And I remember going, pumps, where did you get your BLM mask? She's like, oh, I ordered it. And I go, I love that you're wearing it up here at the Crossings Christian School. And she was like, oh, yeah, me too. And I was like, oh, yeah, me too. And I was

like, not only is she getting deprogram and radicalized, she's getting savage and I am sat for it. That was one of my proudest moments of you. It's so unexpected. I was, I just couldn't believe it because not only had you kind of like broken away from all of them, but you were breaking away and rubbing it in their faces. And I was just like, oh, damn. Go girl. I did she say. I loved it. I mean, I just, I loved it. I just, I loved it. I still love it. Well, thank you. I do. It was fantastic. I do have to say this super quick. When you talk about the bin my sayless and the Midas touch, I just have to say for the permanent record, those are the loveliest. Like when we hit a million on YouTube, I was out of town, didn't know it. They were the first

people to text us and congratulate us. And I just really want to say how giving and how much I appreciate them. And I just think it's so important. They are the nicest people in podcasts. Yeah. Whenever we have needed help or whenever we have had a question, whenever we, she's a lawyer. I'm an interior designer. We don't know what the hell we're doing. They do. And anytime we are like, hey, how should we do this on YouTube? How should we do that? You send them a text and you get a response immediately and the next thing you know, you're on the phone with them. Right. They get nothing from it. That's how much they care about growing independent media that's beholden to no one. And I concur with. pumps that they are phenomenal, phenomenal. Five stars, yeah. All right. Kylie, next review. Okay, the next one is five stars titled, Thank You, and it says, I needed this.

As a gay therapist who has to show up unbiased to all of those biased pink-armed cracker barrel patrons, this podcast is giving me life. I love that. That's interesting about the gay therapist because Emily is in school to be a therapist, and they They had to say, what are their biases? And she was like, my bias, like, you have to work out your bias. You can't be biased as a therapist. You have to, you know, have everybody.

And, you know, she stood up in her class. And everybody, I don't know if she stood up, whatever. But they said, you know, what's your bias? And she goes, I have a huge bias about people that voted for Trump. I can't understand why somebody would do that. And I have a huge bias about that. So that's what she's working on with her advisor, different things like that you guys this is just another props that i have to give to pumps

knowing her for 25 years and the evolution of you politically and the trickle down to your children is is so fabulous it's so because emily is her daughter and she is so compassionate towards LGBTQ plus people towards minorities she's incredibly empathetic i think she's going to make an incredible therapist. But, I mean, six years ago, y'all thought I was a crazy person. I remember you, both of you rolling your eyes at me in the house that you live in right now, because Emily looked at me and said, I mean, you can just look at a monkey until we didn't evolve from them. And I was like, I can actually look at them until we 100% evolved from them. Y'all both looked at me, rolled your eyes like the atheist, crazy liberal Jennifer, rolled

dries and stomped off. And I remember Dylan was with me and we're my son and we're both kind of like, what's up over there? What's up with them? So, I mean, the evolution into critical thinking and enlightenment, it's so fabulous pumps. It's just you should get all the props in the world because when you live in suburban Oklahoma City, it's very white. It's very Christian. It's very Republican. And if you're not that, people treat you with disdain. And the fact that you have found your own self and that you're writing your own script right now and that your children and you are having conversations that aren't binary and black and white and that are grayer and more reflective of the human experience, I love it for you.

I love it for Emily, Sam and Luke. I just love it. I do. It's beautiful. Well, thank you. It really is. It's really, really beautiful. I mean, I've been with her for so long that the evolution, you guys, I cannot overstate how dramatic it is.

I cannot. She used to think people were 900. For real. Didn't you? I did. Okay. I did. I did.

All right. Kylie, did you think people were 900? You were raised in a megachurch. No, I don't even remember learning that or processing that, really. She was a better Bible study student than you were, Kylie. I taught Bible study, bitch. Not just better. Okay, wait.

When you say you taught Bible study, Well, I was a leader. I was a leader of a small group. Here's our book, Life is a Lazy Susan of Shit Sandwich. It's like, what would you say if you started the Bible study? Like, Kylie and I arrive at Bible study. Well, okay, as a shock to no one as I held this book up, it was all scripted. Like they told you the talking points and all that stuff to say.

And then they had questions. Like the church? No, it's like a whole other thing. But you did it at church, but the church was not part of the deal. It was a whole different thing. So they sent you a script. I mean, not like a script, but you had a workbook, you know, like a workbook tearouts that they do. But so you got it every week and you studied what the workbook said and answered the questions that the workbook pages had out of the Bible.

So it wasn't like I was like reading, interpreting, and here's my point of view. It was like stick to the script kind of thing. Gotcha. You know, I'm just going to say this objectively. Like, it's amazing the staying power that the Bible has had. It's really not even that great of a read. I remember my high school boyfriend, my first high school boyfriend, his mother was just worried sick that I wasn't saved.

So she bought me this precious moment's Bible. And I remember I started reading it at the beginning. My mother was horrified. Right. And I remember I got like a couple pages in. And I was like, this is snooze. I mean, this is as boring. You know, so then I kind of like flip to the middle.

It's boring. The really juicy stuff is like the, you know, Leviticus where they're talking about stallions and releasing your seed and all of that. You know, that's kind of juicy. There's some juicy stuff in there. A lot of fucked up sex in the Bible. Yeah, there's that guy. There's a guy in the Bible.

I don't know his name. Y'all, you might know. I probably don't. Okay. He's a old guy. And his daughters. get him all liquored up and then his daughters rape him to have a baby or something i believe he yeah his daughter's slip him a mickey and rape him that's in the bible yeah no i remember

reading that sort maybe it was abraham i don't know to be fair i never looked at the bible not once until i was grown and had kids and went to the bible study like i went to church okay so let me get this you hadn't read the bible at all and then you jumped to being a teacher of the Well, no, I went as a student. What you did, do you have to do training to be a Bible study instructor? I don't think you did. I don't remember that. I know I had a special class I went to, but that was just in preparation for the next.

I've heard, you know, when you live in the South, you hear women a lot of times that I kind of, that are acquaintances and I'll bump into it like Target or somewhere, the grocery store. And I'll be like, hey, how are you? Oh, great. I just finished Bible study. It's a thing. always think like, God, what a boring way to spend an hour or two. You know, going over Iron Age morality where the first four of the Ten Commandments are about God's ego.

Like, I just feel like we've advanced so far beyond that. Like, I'd much rather read Freud or some new study about, you know, the impacts of social media on our species. I just think there's such a better use of time. Yeah. No, I just, I just remember my mom said, I'm going to come over and watch Sam on Tuesday morning so you can go to Bible study. I was like, okay, great. It was just. So she decided it for you? Yeah. Yeah. That's a shock to that one. This episode of I've had it is brought to you by booking.com. Booking. Yeah. From vacation rentals to hotels across the U.S. Booking.com has the ideal summer stay for absolutely anyone, even those who might seem impossible to please. Whether you're booking for yourself,

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TikTok's severe diarrhea on United Flight leads to hazmat cleanup and flight cancellation. TikToker Megan Reinerston, an actress and nanny, experienced extreme diarrhea and vomiting, which she attributed to an undercooked burger consumed in Portugal. She remained in the aircraft laboratory for an extended period, even during landing. with crew assistance. The severity of the situation necessitated a full hazmat team to clean the aircraft, resulting in the cancellation of the subsequent flight. Rinerston publicly apologized to passengers whose travel plans were disrupted, describing herself as a, quote, biohazard, patient zero, and her TikTok videos. Okay, here's the thing on that. I would know more

want my name out there with that? Like, I would want to fly that shit under the radar. I mean, ever since the Delta shitter, before I fly, I'm always thinking, am I going to be the delta shitter? Like, it's like that. So now this is going to be in my head. I would have hid my face. I would have put my purse over my face and wrapped it around my neck,

so no one wouldn't know my face. So I kind of, there's a part of me that gives her props for just saying, it was me. I'm sorry, it happened. My back. I mean, I think. She's probably of the generation where they live their lives kind of online. And I give her props, too, that she just kind of like, she made it go viral. And I read further in this article that United Airlines confirmed that it was true. She's not doing this to get clicks. Like it genuinely happened. It was genuinely her. And then she laughed at herself. So I think that part of it is kind of refreshing. I mean, she can't help it that she had food poisoning. That's what I was going to say. Like if you're in a situation like that, you just can't, you can't help it. I mean, you're in there during land. it must be bad. Okay. Next step, I want Kylie to play. A Walmart worker quit her job over the store

intercom. Play it. The managers, fuck this company, fuck this position, and fuck that big, lazy bitch, Chris Price. I fucking quit. A Louisiana Walmart employee by the name of Beth McGrath decided to quit, and she did it over the loudspeaker. Attention, Walmart shoppers and associates. My name is Beth from electronics. I've been working at Walmart for almost five years, and I can say that everyone here is overworked and underpaid. And customers poorly every day, whenever we have a problem with it, we're told that we're replaceable. I'm tired of the constant gaslighting. This company treats their elderly associates like shit to Jared, our store manager. You're a pervert. I love her. I love her. That is, that is like she has had it. She has had it. Jared.

is a pervert and at the same time how she's advocating Walmart sucks yeah they treat their employees like shit especially the elderly ones Jared's a purve and I have fucking had it fuck this place I'm tired of y'all gaslighting me I think this woman deserves a profile and courage I'd hire her on the spot to work at I've had a podcast that is the energy that we need she's woke AF fighting for the marginalized standing up to Walmart I love this woman so much. I did too. I just can't.

Jared the pervert. I mean, I was all in before. What did she? Kylie, what do you think about that while pumps pulls herself together? I love her. My first job was at Walmart and that place does fucking suck. Yeah, and here's the thing, listener, about Walmart is they, they pay their employees shit, total shit. and then their employees are on like food stamps

or some sort of supplemental income and then everybody browbeats them and they work at fucking Walmart and for 40 hours a week Walmart won't pay them well but we subsidize your taxpayer money subsidizes Walmart Walmart. Walmart is a welfare corporation because they don't pay their people enough

so they have to get food stamps housing subsidies, something like that instead of Walmart and like they're so rich there's like I don't know four or five heirs that like when they do the the list of the richest Americans they all have their own separate line like in the top 20 right so if you put them all together as one big family they're like the richest but there's so many errors to it that they're individually that rich and they don't pay people well and they're hiring pervy Jared

you had to see I just got I know I couldn't help it perhaps he's a perker she's at it that's going to be me at the homeowners and he's a maga and the guy that controls the gate clickers is a pervert maga cancels mctocatis and i'm going to stand up right next to you and go yeah get him all right kiley do we have collars we do have colors okay up first i'm going to play one from fran i don't want to give her any more attention than she's already getting but I've had it with Kim Davis. Okay, who does this bitch think she is to try to cancel out gay marriage? And she's been married four times to three different men. How the fuck do you marry the same man twice? Number one, that's dumb in itself. Why didn't it work out the first time?

And why did you marry him again? That's just stupid. And also, growing up in Kentucky in the Bible Belt, I don't want to hear shit about the sanctity of marriage from the, hypocritical ass fake Christians because I know y'all are out here whoring around on your husbands and wives because I've seen it I know people who have done it and I don't care to spill names if they slide in my DMs but anyway I also like I know they're mad because these openly out and proud gays are openly out and proud while these fake ass hypocrites are hiding out

in their closet watching gay porn behind their wives' backs. So, you know, who does she think she is? Fuck you, Kim Davis. I love this woman. That was perfect. I couldn't have said it any better myself. No. And the biggest message of this listener is as loud and as obnoxious as Maga is, this caller from Kentucky pumps me and every single one of you out there listening. We all know there are way more of us that are not judgmental, not total hypocrites. Don't give a fuck. Marry who you want to. Right.

And we all know the Kim Davis is of the world. Always. And here's the thing. She looks like my mom always called them bunheads. I think that's too kind. My mother called Pentecostals bunheads that wore the skirt that went below the knee and then they had the long hair. they could never cut, that they kind of pulled back.

Yeah. She has that bunhead affect. For sure. And so I'm wondering about, like, is there a reach around with or some way to skirt? I would think that that's a pretty rigorous religion that divorce and stuff would be frowned upon. See, that was my first question when I saw her picture after like, so Kim has had four husbands and I haven't been laid in 750,000 days. Like, that's not good on me.

But, I mean, I was just like, she's been a call. how does she have four divorces or three divorces, four husbands? She had kids. She had a baby by husband number whatever, three maybe while she was married to husband number one. Like this woman is, she is not scared to fuck around with these men. And think about how tragic this will be. If her case makes it to the Supreme Court and the Supreme Court, those six justices are so depraigned. a leader will beat off to it he'll be like

oh my God getting rid of gay marriage that they will deny so many people their rights to equality and to marriage

for that woman that just walking bunhead hypocrite is just so fucked up and the fact that so many on the Supreme Court were minority

appointments right meaning like you know the Bush didn't win the popular vote and he appointed I think Alito Trump 1.0 didn't win the popular vote and he appointed you know two or three of those people and it's just and they make these decisions that have such great impact on human rights and equality it's really really daunting it's really sad for that just like the color said that hypocritical and everybody knows all these loud megachurch people are so full of shit and they're such hypocrites. And if they, their own personal lives or as deranged as Kim Davis's, their fellow church members, they know that their fellow church members are just as deranged

and they look the other way. And they're like, well, they're, you know, they ask God for forgiveness. And so it's fine now. So I'm going to forgive too. Yep. Come to Angie's Bible study. We'll talk about there. Come to Angie's.

With all the 900-year-old attendees. And Jared is a per. Jared's coming. He's 750. Okay. Up next we've got Kathy. Hi, Jen. Hi, HBIC.

Hi. What's your name this week? Katie and your bitch, Seth. My name's Kathy. And I am, I work in the healthcare industry. I'm a nurse. My God, please don't tell Josh. Do not give him a contact information.

I am not about being his fucking concierge nurse. So I get enough, hey, so you're a nurse. messages anyway. So here's my, here's my, I've fucking had it. I have fucking had it with blanket emails for management. Look, God damn it, if I have fucked up and I have been giving IV push insulin instead of subcutaneous insulin and people are falling down right and left. Dead as a fucking doorknob, that's a saying here in the South, dead as a fucking doornaub, then yes, I want you to come to me and say, hey, Kathy, you really screwed the pooch on this one. People are dying because you don't know what the fuck

you're doing. I need you to either get your shit together or get the fuck out. That's what I need you to do. Okay? What I don't need you to do is send an email to the whole team that says we're going to have some mandatory education because we've had some incidences. We've got some opportunities. That's what they call them now.

We don't call them problems anymore. We call them opportunities. We've got some opportunities for some education in medication administration. Do this mandatory education by said date or, you know, there will be repercussions. I've fucking had it with blanket emails, because I'm telling you, if you send me that email and it doesn't say, Dear Kathy, you fucked up, I'm deleting it. I'm not looking at it. I'm assuming I am not the problem. So if I'm the problem, you need to come to me and fucking tell me I am the problem.

I love you, ladies, as a blue dot in a very red county in purple, North Carolina. I love you. Thank you so much. You guys have a lovely day. I fucking love her. I love her. And it's so true. It's like I don't need to be abreast if everybody's things. But I think this goes back to we have to lift everybody up all the time. There's no such thing as constructive criticism in the workplace. We have a problem with how this is going instead of saying that we have an opportunity to learn.

I'm just like, shut the fuck up. Go to the person that did it and say, hey, da-da-da-da. If you have a couple people doing it, single them. out like not everybody needs to go do all this shit i agree and i just think that if somebody screws up the best path is you screwed this up here's what you did let's move past it please fix it and maybe it's not pretty and maybe the person fills a jolt of adrenaline but welcome to adulthood right that's i mean it's just and there's nothing worse than circle jerk emails oh my gosh nothing i mean just i don't know the email what circle jerk zoom calls oh my god

God. Oh my God. Those are worse. I'd rather have a circle jerk email. Pumps and I need to share with everybody that we have written a book. It's called Life is a lazy Susan of shit sandwiches. And believe it or not, pumps and I have not always been so rock solid. And we talk about all of our trials, tribulations, most of all are fuckups. Yes, because fuckups are relatable and a part of the human experience. I have gotten so much feedback regarding the book that because of my situation with the religion and addiction and all that, that people relate to that. So I do think there's something to take away that's comforting about it because we've all been in very difficult situations. And listener, what we want you to do, this is

the it book for summer reading. So please get your copy of Life is a Lazy Susan of shit sandwiches and take a picture of yourself with the book in really great places and tag at I've Had It podcast and we will share your images with our summer it book you can buy it in bookstores you can buy it in the link in our bio you can buy it at target walmart amazon etc all the retailers happy reading and happy summer as my children aren't growing older they're becoming more susceptible to fragrance in the products they use on their skin and that is why i have been now diving in to what are the chemicals in the products that I use. And I am finding that so many chemicals are in there that are unnecessary. I was shocked that my laundry detergent is one of the

worst culprits. So I switched to Earth Breeze. Their detergent sheets are free from harsh chemicals like dyes, parabins, phosphates, and preservatives. And they're way easier to use. no heavy plastic jugs no mess just a pre-measured sheet that dissolves in seconds i feel so much better knowing i'm not exposing myself and my kids to those unnecessary toxin and my laundry still comes out fresh and clean if you want a gentle or clean without harsh chemicals switch to earth breeze they're also backed by a 100% money-back guarantee so basically you are trying it risk-free Right now, you can get 40% off with your subscription at earthbreeze.com slash had it. That's earthbreeze.com slash had it.

Okay, up next we've got Tevay. Good morning, ladies. I'm going to skip right past the goddamn pleasantries and jump right into the fucking haddits. And what I've had it with this week is the goddamn indoctrination of Christianity into this country, something that I even think has affected gin. Oh, Pumps is thinking to yourself, what do you mean? She's famously atheist. Well, hold on to your goddamn life alert necklace pumps. I want to know if you've ever been in a room, had a sneeze, and Jen has trotted out a bless you.

Bless you? Who the fuck is blessing you if God doesn't exist? I fucking had it with this shit. Now, I understand the history behind it. No people thinking you lose your soul or a demon has possessed you. Well, how come nobody's trotting out to bless you when you're fucking ripping ass or burping? two arguably more demonic sounding bodily functions. And I've also had it with the fucking, in God we trust on the currency.

This country is going to hell in a handbasket. How about in good we trust? I've fucking had it. Don't fucking piss me off. I love him. I love that. That is the energy we need. That is.

That is asshole island energy peak. All three callers so far. I do. He's 100% right to call me out and I accept it. I have acquiesced and I find myself. self saying bless you. And then I have thought at the same time when I say it, am I capitulating to Christianity? And I've thought that a lot when I do it. So I appreciate the caller calling me out on that. And I don't know what to say beyond that. I'm open to suggestions in the comment

section on YouTube. Will you guys please give, Trump's making shit up, Gulf of America. Can we make up something new to say instead of bless you? Satan bless you. Illuminati. Beazelbub. Lucifer. 666.6. I'll be honest. You know, this tells you what a great Bible teacher I was.

I didn't really put it together like bless you. God's blessing you. I just thought it was like a courtesy like to acknowledge. I think that that. I think he's the originally. Right. As I think back on it, yes. But here's what I know about the in God we trust on the currency and in the currency and

in the Pledge of Allegiance. I believe, Kylie, if you'll start giving this a goog, I believe that this happened in the 1950s. I think in God we trust was 19, not on the money, but in the Pledge of Allegiance, 1953. Yeah. And so the country, in the 1950s, there was a push to make it more non-secular in the 1950s. And then we all know, you know, what starts happening And then when you get to Reagan, that's when shit really starts hitting the fan. I mean, if we were to, I've seen these memes online, pinpoint the, pinpoint the very beginning starting point of when we found ourselves in this shit. And a lot of people put up a picture of Ronald Reagan.

Really? Yeah, because he really championed for unregulated capitalism. And he really browbeat poverty and really browbeat poor people. And he turned his back on the gay community all in the name of Jesus. And he did that Christian, you know, conservatism where it's like, I'm with Jesus, but I also am about making everybody a rich motherfucker and fuck those poor people. But he was handsome and an actor and he did it with a smile. And he was, you know, like Republicans, when they hear Reagan, they just like literally orgasm on the spot. It's like, oh, Reagan.

But when you really look at him objectively and the damage he did to this country, it's brutal. It's brutal. Yeah, I always blame him for the war on poverty, like the demonizing people that are poor and trickle down economics not working. Yeah, trickle down economics. That's a total racket. Kylie, did you hit the goog? I did it.

In God We Trust first appeared on a silver dollar certificate in 135, and then it was passed in law to be included on currency in 1955. What about the Pledge of Allegiance? I'm just, I'm pulling for 53. First version was written in 1885 And then official recognition by Congress in 1942 God damn it Something happened in 53

I'm going to find it Well I mean do you have any memory of it Fuck you And the horse you read it on She's so ugly Now that you're 51 And I'm 55 We're both in our 50s

Yeah we're in it Yeah We're in it me ma'am You and me All right Next Okay, up next we've got Carrie. Jennifer, Angie, Kylie, I love you all so much.

I've had it, and I mean really, really had it with giant bows on the bald heads of newborn baby girls. I mean, it looks fucking ridiculous. And what's really sad is I think it must be rooted in some desperate need to signal that your baby is a girl. Is it really your biggest fear that some stranger might mistake your girl? girl for a boy. It's so stupid. The equivalent would be sticking false mustaches on baby boys. That's how ridiculous it is. It feels like there's this desperate need to feminize girls before they can even hold their own heads up. And it's not cute. It's borderline child abuse. I find even my most feminist friends posting pictures of their babies with these gigantic bows. And my act of rebellion is to not like

those stitches. It's a pathological need to declare your baby's gender. It's 2025. Get over it. I've fucking had it. Okay. What I'm interested in about this is I think she's Irish. I was going to say Irish. That sounded Irish. And that she, is this going on in Ireland? Are they putting big bows on baby's heads in Ireland? Because I think it had to have started here. All that idea is. Texas in particular, I think, probably. And then it pains me that this is escalated over to there. And I 100% agree with her on this. There is a part of the whole patriarchal culture. And Pumps and I grew up around this. Pumps grew up in this. There is this need to project this princess syndrome on girls.

You are helpless. If you play, oh my God, I didn't realize it. If you play dumb, you get extra. praise. Oh my God, how cute was that? She didn't get that. And it's and put the bow on and really keep reminding that you are a girl. And in all of that stuff, there is a subconscious message that you are weaker and inferior, in my opinion. The women that I know that were raised in this and around this and the big bow culture, there is a definite like, um, oh my god i'm a dingy blonde and you can see from years and years and years of being

raised in patriarchal systems that their default setting is to is to kind of defer back to that instead of i've got this i can handle it like taking the bull by the horns and it's a real regional thing here i think i see it a lot with girls and and grown women now that were raised in these systems and then you see i'm putting the bows on their girls and it's i think It's deeper than just the bow. I agree with the collar in this. I've always thought it was really weird. Yeah, you've hated the bow, always from Jump.

I never did the round bow, probably because I was too disorganized. I probably would have if I would have thought I could handle it. But I did try to get Emily's bow in and she hated it. And you egged her on from Jump. Yeah, so here's the deal. She had this whole, I remember. Emily was the only girl. So I have two boys.

She has two boys and a girl. And we were always together all the time and the kids were little because it's really hard to raise kids. And our husband's really fucked up at the time. And so there was this, I remember correctly, you had like this thing, like a hanger type thing and it went down. Yes. And you had all different colors of bows on it. And it like either hung on the door or on the wall somewhere. I think it was on the door handle, yeah.

I remember the door handle. And so she would get Emily and get her hair all done up and she would put the bow in it. And Emily, and she'd put it, you put it like right here on top. she had bad bangs and she would pull it out and throw it at angie and i would say to angie she's going to be surrounded by gay men and angie at the time good christian girl teaching bible said he goes no she won't she will not how could you say that and i'm like spot it got it i know 100% that your daughter is going to have multiple gay men as her best friends right and you should you know embrace it well and she was offended and then 10 years later emily starts the dance

competitions pumps calls me and she says you're right emily loves gay men gay men love her right eating crow you 100% called it when she was two years old she is knee deep into gay culture yeah the first thing she did when she started a new school is she's like well my first priority is to infiltrate the gays she was like i know if i find gay friends i'm good in college yeah in grad school all right i think that's all we have for today pumps you have anything else to share i just would share that i think that that was upper echelon calls that was that had so much fun today that was really fun it's always my favorite these were great i concur all right please um link in bio penned to the link by our book life as a lazy susan of shit sandwiches

um for those of you uh listeners that are like transitioning from the way your parents wanted you to be and the way your hometown wanted you to be and you see all this stuff with Trump and you think this is screwed up. I'm not for this. My parents are all of my friends from my hometown are. Read the book because I'm telling you, I personally believe that Pump's story is helpful and I think there's a lot of Americans going through that right now that were raised and told you have to be a certain way. And then you see this depravity and you see the rights being taken away from people and you see the dehumanization and you're questioning the very foundations of everything that you were taught. Pumps has answers and life is a lazy

Susan of shit sandwiches. Well, she has the journey for sure. I don't know answers, but I mean, trying, working on it. I think having, I think sometimes answers are knowing you're not alone. Right. Relatability. I do. Yeah, no, I agree with that. I do. I think, I remember when Josh was, you know, and is addiction in knowing that other people were going through it and they started to explain something that I was feeling. And it was verbatim exactly the way I was feeling. I was like, oh, okay, there was a comfort to that. Huge comfort. No, I completely agree with that. And we will see you next Tuesday and Thursday. Matriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday

every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever you get your podcast and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and review so that we we'll chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind, pumps. Pumps, what does an eagle say? Ciccaw! A little bit more enthusiasm. Caca!

That's it. That's, that's, that's, that's, cacca! That's the patriotism that this country means right there.