I've Had It - Everybody Here Hates Me with Taylor Strecker

Episode Date: November 28, 2023

Jennifer and Pumps are joined today by Taylor Strecker, host of the Taste of Taylor podcast. The three discuss an issue which Jen has appropriately named 'vaginasplaining' - Taylor has to take an L when the girls come for her and her bad grocery store behavior. Jennifer has had it with black and white thinkers and Pumps brings the receipts on the stupidest vanity plates (aka douche tags) that have crossed her path this week.Come see I've Had It live on the Hot Sh*t Tour! More info & tickets available at https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast and subscribe to I've Had It wherever you get your podcasts. Thank you to our sponsors: I've Had It is brought to you by Cologuard®. Are you 45 or older? Start screening for colon cancer with Cologuard, an effective and noninvasive screening option for adults 45 and older at average risk for colon cancer. Rx only. Learn more at Cologuard.com/hadit. ZocDoc: Go to Zocdoc.com/IVEHADIT and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Honey Love: Treat yourself to the best bras and shapewear on the market and save up to 50% Off sitewide at honeylove.com/Hadit this month only. Subscribe to our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/IveHadItPodcast Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps Special Guest:  Taylor Strecker: @TaylorStrecker 

So we're supposed to start the podcast. Ready, one, two, three. I love it. I mean, just the rock star of claps. It's Judge Judy Diana. I was hoping you'd forgotten about that. Judge Judy Diana reporting for Judy. Judy Diana, what have you had it with?

What I've had it with is personalized license tags on cars. Oh. There's such, first of all, no one gives a shit. What you have to say on your license tag. I mean, that's fucking ridiculous. Here's the ones that I've accumulated over the last few weeks. Are you brought receipts? I did.

My yacht spelled without the A. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. God rocks. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha- tag. Like I'm like, why wouldn't just random letters be better? Letters and numbers. It's me, ITZ. It's me. And then my personal favorite is spoiled. What the fuck is wrong with people? I mean, really, I have long called these douche tags. I mean, really, I have long called these douche tags. They're douche tags. It's a personalized license plates. Are it's a red flag in motion? Yes.

In these red flags are parading around, but here's the deal. We can either be mad about it or we can have gratitude that these people have identified themselves as a, you know, you have to stay away from them immediately. Absolutely.

And I do sometimes, I get a whole narrative in my head, like spoiled. I was like, what do we think spoiled is? Do you think her husband's super controlling and he wanted her to advertise that got this car? I mean, I spend this whole narrative of their license tag. Like, it's me.

What are you fucking vanilla ice cream? I mean, that's terrible. Do you do a fantasy-ass chew of the offender? Like, where you would be like, what the fuck does that mean? Yeah, I totally do that. Like, in my head, I'm like, fantasy conversation. We're like, listen up, you fucking moron. It's me.

Well, who the fuck do we think it's gonna be? Right. It's your car. Of course it's you. Yeah. And why do you fucking have this on your tag? You stupid idiot. I think my first question would be, what the fuck is wrong with you?

Like, why do you feel it so necessary to grandstand on your license plate? Because typically that's the most boring thing on the planet earth. But I guess it does give a little entertainment while you're driving because I did, I've put all these in my phone as I'm driving because I'm just like stupid assholes. But let me ask you this. Should we just do a ban? I don't want to do a ban because some of them are so fucked up by daygum. Right.

You know? It's fun to view other people's crazy. And you just sit back and think, you know, as crazy as I am and all the stupid shit I've done, I'm not announcing it on my license plate. At least I haven't put that red flag out. You bring up a very valid point because that is something all the shit we bitch about that drives us crazy. Really enhances our life

because it further confirms for us, an hour listener that we're all fucking nuts. But we could be a lot fucking crazier. The worst part about the crazies is the people that are the craziest that don't think they're crazy. That's really what I enjoy most. Somebody that's just a fucking nut

but has no idea about it. The lack of self-awareness. It's like going to see a play on Broadway. It's like they believe this shit they're spewing. Yeah. I like it. Yeah. As an observer.

No, crazy people are kind of fun. Yeah, I mean, I don't want them in my life, but I do like them at a distance. Yeah. A reasonable observation distance. Yes. I agree with that. Let me tell you what I've had it with. Okay.

I've had it with people that don't understand compound feelings. Oh, that's a big one. I'll give you an example. I love Josh. However, he's been driving me crazy lately and I've been having homicidal thoughts regarding him. Right, I think that's normal. It's totally normal, or maybe a listener could be like, I love Jennifer and Judy Diana.

But Jennifer sure is bossy towards Judy Diana and I'm not going to listen to them anymore. It's like they can't hold two truths at the same time. And so many things in life are gray. Like you love your husband, you love them the majority of the time, but sometimes you want to strangle them. Right. You love your children.

Would do anything on the planet for them. While at the same time they drive you fucking crazy. Absolutely. And it's the people, the black and white thinkers, and black and white thinkers are often braggers about their black and white thinking. Yeah, I think that's probably true. They brag about it. They're the ones who everything,

it's an all acceptance or an all opposing. And I just, I'm like, can you not, like we have these brains that are really, like the most evolved on the planet, right, out of all the species, and allow your brain to hold two truths at the same time, right? But I do remember growing up because I was raised very black and white. There was no gray. And I do remember the compound feelings, like epiphany, when I got to college, like, oh,

okay. Right. So I mean, I do think it's dangerous. No, it's very dangerous, like black and white thinkers. And I've just, I've always noticed, whenever somebody is a black and white thinker, they always flex about it. And I'm like, you're really owning yourself

as kind of not being a very evolved thinker, but notice it every time they'll be like, you know, I'm just a real black and white thinker. Right. Like, know what you're saying is a real black and white thinker. It's like, no, what you're saying is, you're not a deep thinker. What you're saying is, you're a really shallow thinker

and borderline and non-thinker. Right, it could be said, a non-thinker. Yes. Welcome to, I've had it, I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. I've started to call her Judy Diana and that's short for Judge Judy, Princess Diana. And now she's just Judy Diana.

Cause as pumps has said before, Josh and I nickname everybody. And so now Angela, who was Angie, and then Angelina, pumpkin, Tina, and then pumps, Tina full of pumps. You've got a Tana full of pumps. Now we're going to just Judy Diana. Right. We're just making a break for it. But see, I refer to like pumps as being your proper name.

And then nickname for pumps is Judy Diana. I remember when they had those initial necklaces, they were super popular a few years ago. Yeah. And I had on an A one time and you go, why do you have an A on? And I was like, because it's my initial and you said, oh, yeah, I was thinking pumps. I remember that. I was like, because it's my initial, and you said, oh, yeah, I was thinking pops. I remember that.

I was like, who is the A? Right, because I thought it should for sure be a P. P, right? Okay, so before I kick it to Kylie, I just want to share some alarming news that I read about in the British press. So there is a Montana LGBTQ plus family that is crowdsourcing to raise $4,000, which is around $5,000

to flee the state of Montana because their laws are so dangerous and scary. And so one of the things the legislatures in Montana is doing, which Oklahoma follows very similarly to this. As they are proposing a bill that would stop LGBTQ plus people from bringing claims of sexual orientation or gender identity discrimination in areas like employment, housing, healthcare, and education. And this article goes on and on, and this is not the American press. And so for all of you that dip into our comment section and say, Oh, you guys are trying to be woke.

We are watching civil rights erode in front of us. And that is horrible. It's horrible and it's embarrassing. And it just makes you think these people that are making these laws have zero empathy. They don't give a shit about anybody but themselves. And I just can't help but think they're not evolved thinkers at all. I think they're probably black and white thinkers. I think you nailed it.

And I think they probably flex about being black and white. 100% and this is so horrible because most of these people say, I love my freedom. That's what drives me the most crazy. You cannot love freedom and then want to regulate somebody else's sex life. You cannot love freedom and want to control another person's body. You cannot love freedom and do the book banning. I mean, it's just like it's counterintuitive. It's an oxymoron. So if you just want to say, I'm a racist, homophobic bigot, I would have more respect for you than, oh, I'm a, you know, I'm freedom of speech. My first memory, I'd say bullshit. You're not. The only thing

you give a shit about is everybody believing what you believe and doing what you think is right. And guess what? Out of 310 million people, nobody's going to think alike. I mean, they're just not. Well, and how boring is that? Oh, it's missionary sex, deluxe city. Listen to Pops throwing out.

I just get mad about it. No, I get so mad about it. No, I get so mad about it and I get mad that these conservative legislatures are trying to pass laws that legalize discrimination based on sexual orientation. And it is so horrible. And we've had it. Had it. Had it. Kylie. Hi. How do you feel about me and Pumps? I love you guys. Oh, we love you. I think earlier she hated us I shall never say that but I could tell I've never hated them for the permanent record. I love them Yeah, you can love us and hate us Situationsally filling hatred we allow our friendships to have that type of space and that type of compound feelings

That's good to know. Yeah, you can, you can, in situations hate us even though we know that deep down you love us and we give each other permission to do that to each other and we're now inviting you in on that. I want to get, you don't have permission to hate me ever there. It's got to be straight love across the board. Okay. It's a one way straight.

I'll try. Okay, so we had a listener write in. Okay. And this is something she really wants to bring to your attention. Okay. Her name is Stephanie, and she writes, Jennifer and Pumps, I only recently found your podcast, and I love it. I'm 73, so probably not your normal demographic, but it makes me laugh so much.

I enjoyed your episode about gender reveal parties because I too think they are just plain stupid, not to mention dangerous. With that in mind, I just read on HuffPost about a new trend that is horrifying. This trend is called period parties. They are put on by parents when their daughter gets her first period. All the food is blood themed. Oh!

And Goodybags contain period products. This sounds like something you ladies should check out. Oh my gosh, Stephanie, I love that you're 73 and just found our podcast because number one, you can get on podcast, which is something I couldn't do. And Stephanie, you're so much closer to pumps is age. So that's why she feels comfort in that. Right. She's closer to my age than you are four years

versus 20. You're too wide. First of all, I just just why would anybody want to announce and have a party about somebody's period starting? I mean, I just, I'm flabbergasted by that. I mean, I get like giving period products to people. I mean, I don't have a problem with that. But like, what the fuck is wrong with these people? I almost think that's worse than a gender reveal. I mean, I've never heard of it until now. So I have to process it, but that, it's nobody's fucking business.

I mean, I was horrified when my mom told my brother that I started my period. I mean, I was, I remember it so clearly. So I can't imagine that that's kind of information you want your parents sharing with their friends. Well, I, I agree with you. I didn't start my period until I was like 16. Like 15. Super late.

Super late. All of the friends had all started their periods. And I remember that they'd be like, did you get yours? Did you get yours? So if you're a lay plumber, like, like we were. And then you're one of the last to get it. It's like, you, I don't know. It's just, I mean, whatever you want to do, but that just seems really fucking bizarre. It seems like a boundary violation. Like why up in America?

Is this how you're being here? Did you look it up on HuffPose? Yes, America. And I did look it up and I saw images. There's like a red and white cake that says congrats on your period and decorations that say menstruation celebration and just they invite all the friends. What's the psychology behind it?

What I read is that the idea behind it is to destigmatize periods. Okay. I don't think just because something is private, it has to be necessarily stigmatized. Yeah, I mean, I see the destigmatizing it. I think instead of spending the money on that, I think you should spend the money taking your child to start their period, say, this is totally normal in what we're going to do since I can afford to get you tampons and pads. We're going to go buy a bunch of Costco and we're going to take them to a shelter to

give to women that can't afford them. I think that's a great idea. And I think maybe that would be a better way to do it because if you want to destigmatize something that women are stigmatized enough, I support that component do it. Because if you want to destigmatize something that women are stigmatized enough, I support that component of it. But having like a birthday, I mean, a period party where you have blood-themed food, ew.

Ew. I like the idea of destigmatizing. I love the idea of giving people less, less fortunate period products. I'm all for it. I just think the whole party thinks stupid. I'm just going to, I'm going to put it on the permanent record. I think menstruation parties are unnecessary and stupid. Permanent record, menstruation parties, stupid, also permanent record,

give free period products to people. Right. Contain yourself on the party. It's, you know, one day when we're dead, right? The permanent record will live on. Because a joke. Yes. The permanent record shall live on. And it is so chock full of great ideas. You know, the some books last, you know, like you've got the Iliad, right?

In the Odyssey. You and I have the permanent record. Right. And it will live on long past our lives. I can't wait if we have grandchildren for our grandchildren to look at that and be like, who are these nets? Yeah. Yeah.

All right. Well, anyway, that's our, that's our pre-show. Now it's time. Now it's time for Judy Diana and I to move on to the interviewing portion of the podcast. And I would like to welcome the host of Taste of Taylor Taylor, Strecker whom we absolutely adore. Let's get Taylor Strecker on here. Pams, do you know what I'm so thankful for this season? What?

That you no longer take off your bras on our airline flights from here to there. It was so embarrassing. Embarrassing for you, but I was miserable. Thank goodness I found honey love cross-over bras. You know, honey love is just as easy to put on as it is to take off, but it is so comfortable. You no longer take yours off in public places, which is a gift to all of humanity. Ladies, gift the gift of comfort this holiday season, whether you're attending a wedding, hosting a big Thanksgiving dinner, or simply seeking that every day boost of confidence. Honey Love is the perfect plus one. Treat yourself to the best bras and shapewear on the market and save up to 60% off site-wide

at honeylab.com slash hadit this month only. Inventory is limited in the sale in soon, so don't miss their best deals of the year. After you purchase, they'll ask where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them we sent you. It's time to ditch the underwear for good. Thanks to honeylab. At honeylab.com slash had it.

Pumps, ever since you've started using ZockDock, have you found that better for all of your medical needs? I have it makes it so easy. I found both kids, doctors in their college towns. It was easy. They took my insurance and it was super convenient for them too. That's always the bummer. You think you find the perfect doctor, and then you find out they don't take your insurance. This is where a ZocDoc can enter. ZocDoc is a free app where you can find amazing doctors and book appointments online.

We're talking about booking appointments with thousands of top-rated patient-reviewed doctors and specialists. You can filter specifically for ones who take your insurance or are located near you and treat almost any condition you're searching for. Go to zok.com slash I've had it and download the zok.app for free. Then find and book a top rated doctor today. That's zoc doc.com slash I've had it. Zock.com slash I've had it. Taylor, our good friend Taylor, welcome to I've had it.

Hi guys, hey girls, hey, I have to say my moniker. How are you guys? We're great. We were just lunch talking about how excited we were to have you on, because you're so much fun. Oh, really? I'm blatant. And when you guys just said I was your friend,

like my heart just kind of like dropped to my bottom a good way. So thank you for that. So we were recently on your pod and we totally bonded. I felt like it was like a total bond experience. And we were so excited to have you on our pod so that our listeners could experience the razzle dazzle chemistry of you and Pumps and me. I mean, the amount of DMs I got,

like the mashup I've been waiting for, we have a lot of fan overlap or a lot of listener overlap, which I, again, my heart dropped to my butt, I was very proud of myself because you guys are iconic, but yeah, I had so much fun with you guys, I got such a great response to the podcast, so I'm so glad to be back here, ladies. Thank you.

Yes, okay, Taylor, as you know, this is a space where we're gonna shit talk. You know that, right? Love it, right? Yeah. I mean, we got it. We have to do this to be able to function as adults. We have to like have a place, you know,

like, you know, that sound a dump truck makes for us. Wap, wap, wap, sound a dump truck makes For that's what this is we're gonna dump all the excess grievances here so right out of the gates Tell us what you've had it with oh my god I've had it I've had a week so I just had it with like every fucking person in my life I What have I had it with I've had it with What have I had it with? I've had it with mansplaining, but from women. Because I don't think people realize that mansplaining is a thing.

And when you hear from a man, you kind of just like, I were like, it's totally silent. Like they're just mansplaining. Men will manplain, they'll do as a do. But like this week, I've had friends, family members, spouses who have vaginas and they have been explaining to me. And I'm like, wait, you don't have a dick so it's actually more offensive

when you talk to me like this. Yes, I agree. It is more offensive when a woman mansplains. Oh my God. And where are they learning it from? I thought we were supposed to work together to combat mansplaining, but are they learning it from? Like I thought we were supposed to work together to combat man's explaining. But like, are they learning it from other men?

Or are they like trying to match their big dick energy? Like I just don't understand where this is coming from. Like we as women, it's like, and this is so sexist, but I'm gonna say it. Like when there's, let's say a man and a woman, there's cheating that goes on, right? The mistress always gets more blame than the man and it's not okay.

But it is what happened. Right. But a lot of times when we'll say, well, like women should know better. And so it's like the same thing with mansplaining. It's like, we know better. So it's even that much more egregious. So I've had it with being mansplained to by women, for sure.

Yeah, I agree. I totally agree. I mean, there are sometimes where in business settings where I'm on the phone with somebody and we've already discussed all of the highlights that we need to discuss. And then they do a circle back in to just repeat everything that we just did.

And when it's a guy, I totally get it because he's grandstanding, you know, he's gotta have this moment that he goes using out. But when it's a woman, I'm always like, huh, that's interesting. We just established all of this. Why are we circling back and going over everything again from top to bottom?

Like, we're done here. Let's move on. Yeah. Exactly. And the only time it's appropriate to repeat yourself in woman world is when you're mad about something and you don't want to resolve it. and I totally co-sign that. When I'm complaining about something it's like I'm not looking for a resolution. I'm just looking to bitch and repeat myself over and over and over again.

But yeah, when you're working on like something business related or that's like it doesn't even end result. I just I can't with the with the woman mansplaining. I mean, but woman's planning doesn't even like cover it right? I mean, what could you even call it? It's just the China's planning the China's planning the China's plan, but I want to lean into something you just said because we haven't talked about this and I think this is so important and So underreported How sometimes you just want to be fucking mad and straight mad and that's okay. Yes. Yes. I get that. I get that to the core of my being and she and I allow each other to do that with, but sometimes I'm so mad at something. I have to fantasy as to in my head. I have to call palms roll play with her where I fantasy as to with her. Before

I go to bed at night, I'm gonna ask you with some more. Same with her, vice versa. And she'll tell me like she was recently fantasy-ass chewing something to do with her children's school. I allowed her the space to be fucking mad for three or four days, I didn't try to talk her off the ledge. I didn't tell her she was being crazy.

I didn't tell her her anger was irrelevant. I was like, I get it. And I'm grinding my teeth. I'm here with you. I'm angry too. Yeah, that's being a good friend or a good partner. And I'm a late life lesbian just to catch your audience off of case.

We don't know. And we're going to get to that. Yeah. Before I just want to make sure, listener, that we just do a little ear mark right here. Layton life lesbian on the podcast. We're going to circle back to Pams as our listeners are dying for but anyway, go ahead. So I was with a lot of men like not like in a skanky way, but you know what I mean, like I had like a like a lot of relationships with men enough that I can speak to the

heterosexual experience. Right. And like, of course, again, not to be sexist, but we expect men to be like, oh my God, like, what's the solution you're talking in circles? I'm sick of hearing about this drama. And when I got together with my now wife, I expected like just a shit talking fast, like that would be our lives, because all my girlfriends and my best friends growing up, like, that's what you do, me and my my mom you just talk things to death and you Validate each other and you never ever make the person stop and you repeat yourself and it's just like it's the most bonding thing on the face of the planet. And so I thought my wife would just like acquiesce because we're both women and she has the littlest tolerance for my drama out of anyone I've ever been a relationship with. And it drives me. Is this like, is this a pitfall to later in life

lesbianism? No, he tricked me. She is the most straight acting, straight acting woman lesbian I've ever known in my life. Like so many friends that I have that are lesbians, like they do the here's a thing. All the bad qualities of female relationships are in my relationship. All the good qualities of female relationships. Somehow have a stupas. I mean, I'm really shitting on her right now. I adore her. I love her bits and pieces. She like is my puzzle piece, which is the gayest thing I've ever said.

That is pretty gay. Yeah, that's really gay. I like it. I think it's sweet. I do too, but I like it, but it is really gay. I like it. Okay, Taylor. When we did our email with you to prep for the episode,

you zeroed in on something you've had it with that is totally in my will house. And this is about suburban carans. And number one, I've been sounding the alarm on this podcast about the suburbs for quite some time. So I want to hear your take on the suburbs, suburban carans, because I think there's a lot of fuckery going on in the suburbs. So, okay. So I have been with my family now for like about a week. And I'm losing my mind. But I live, you know, I've lived in New York City forever.

I recently moved to Jersey City, don't hold against me, but it's still very like NYC adjacent. So like I'm a city gal. I run errands and like I walk everywhere. And I just say I love the idea of like getting in my car and driving to the grocery store, but I've been doing a lot of driving when I'm here because like I'm the de facto Aaron Runner,

which you know, get me out of the house, I'm glad to do it. But by doing so, I've been encountering a lot of other human beings also running errands. And the amount of looks I get, like I feel like I'm constantly in trouble, but I know I'm not doing anything wrong

or at least I don't think I am. but it's like the way that these women, okay, especially when you're driving down the street. And people, we live in a town that's like, coastal, my parents are outside of Boston. And there's really like, they don't believe in sidewalks here, okay? So it's like, people take walks at their own risk as far as I'm concerned. Right. So it's like, you've got to like, you have to edge this side of the road, but these carers with their golden retrievers, like, they don't join. And then they have the gall to look at me coming around a corner,

like, slowed everybody has slow bound eyes. And it's like, I'm going 15 miles an hour. Like, how much slower can I go? I'm like 20 miles under the ceiling. And it's just, but like, I feel like I'm perpetually going to the principal's office here. And it's just, it's just the look. But like, I just feel like I keep, like, even at the grocery store.

I just feel like, I'm like, I think there's a set of rules of the suburbanites that like, I did not get like the blueprint on it. And so I am like breaking rules left and right. Although I will say this and this is so obnoxious. So I wouldn't call them, but I'm like, I'm like, I'm suburbanites that like I did not get like the blueprint on it. So I am like breaking rules left and right. Although I will say this and this is so obnoxious. So I wouldn't call me an influencer, but like I do influencery things for my job. Right.

And I was doing like a VIP video for my Patreon. I was making my grandma's meatloaf. We call her muffiner. Muffiners meatloaf. So I was like vlogging grocery shopping because the grocery store is so gorgeous. And the entire grocery store patrons, workers, and one guy even hit my cart into me and like I got it got caught in my trench coat and I like fell over and he didn't even say he was sorry.

It was like psychotic. I was making enemies left to read the grocery store. I feel like in New York City, if somebody's like taking video in front of a slice of El Vida, you just like let them live. You know, but I, I, I, I just do like some sort of witchcraft or something. Taylor, I have to tell you,

if I saw somebody blogging at the grocery store, I'd probably give him a dirty look. I'm not gonna lie. I mean, I would probably think in my head, are you so important that your grocery list has to be on the internet? That's probably what I'd think, but I wouldn't think that about you

because I adore you. And I get the whole vlogging and Patreon and all that. But since I do live in the suburbs, that is a perspective that I would have. I think both can be true. I think the suburbs are fucked up and I think that there's a lot of feckery going on in the suburbs and there's a lot of entitlement

and a lot of homogeneity and I could go on on. But I also kind of tend to agree with pumps about the vlogging in the grocery store. And Taylor, you know we love you, but I mean, this is a space where I have to say the dirty looks and the eye rolls were probably warranted if you're grandstanding and making videos in the grocery store. You know what? I'll take the L. I did it to my damn self. Yeah, I mean, then the whole thing,

I'm like, it's not even usable content because I'm whispering and I'm like, I just keep going this, everybody in your head means. I'm like, least you had self-awareness. See, that's a win for me. Oh, man, it is disrupting though when you are like, when you're out,

like we were on summer vacation and everywhere we went Everybody's just like if you're to restaurant or to site it everybody is filming their life for Instagram In the lack of awareness of what's going on around them. It's it's it's become kind of irritating And I could see that if you're a grocery shopper which I hate hate going to the grocery store, and you run into bubbly, latent life lesbian Taylor, whispering like a psycho up and down every aisle, mad at her wife, I bet I would totally I roll God damn city for sure. There, there, and then I went there.

I've been to the grocery store a lot. I'm really, they're gonna ban me. My wife and I went there and she was so hungry. When've been to the grocery store a lot. I really, they're gonna ban me. My wife and I went there and she was so hungry. When she gets hungry, she's like, it's like a child who's hungry. She blacks out, I think. It's like, you know how sharks, I great whites, their eyes roll on the back of their head

when they chew, right? That happens to her. Yes. So she was like, I need chicken fingers. So we went to the deli and she treated the deli as if it was her own personal bar. And she pushed big huge bags of bread, fresh big bread, like over the side.

And she plopped down and she went and got a ketchup and opened it. I mean, she had a couture of mom. It was crazy. And I even had to be like, honey, it's like, we're given, we're given a lot of lesbian, New York City, entitled energy right now. We got it, We got it.

We got it. She opened a ketchup. It was, yeah, I, you know, I should probably not go to the grocery store ever again. Okay. Upon further reflection, maybe go to a different grocery store. Yeah, maybe go terrorize another grocery store in the suburbs. With this rampant New York City lesbianism.

Go. Everybody in the suburbs know you're not safe, mother fuckers. My wife and I are coming for you. I like that. The gay agenda is in full swing. And she also, my wife always says she gets horny in grocery stores. Don't ask me. I'm actually like,

she's groping you in the grocery stores this before after the chicken nugget. After she had to first fill her stomach up before she could focus on Groping. Okay, let me ask you this. How do you and your wife feel about PDA? Okay, so it's like a multifaceted question. So we are very affectionate, and I wanna be clear, affectionate doesn't necessarily mean we have like a rampant sex life, okay?

Like we're just like, we're so like, cuddly and kissy, and we also both work from home. So we can be PDA-ish like all day long, but it's not like in front of anybody, you know? Right. But I think whenever we're in public, like today, it wants to get coffee and take grab my boom. Cause you know, like how could you reserve?

And there was like a creepy guy that was like, I don't know, like washing the windows of his car at the coffee place, he was a strange one. Okay. He had like a big long cigarette. He had like, I don't trust a man that smokes a hundred, you know, like, I'm crazy. I'm so proud of him. It's a true love.

It's kind of a pissing, totally agree. All right. Totally. So he's like, has a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. He's cleaning his like gelopy of a car. And he kept looking at us because we are in, of course, we are, because we're lesbians. We're in a Jeep Wrangler. So he was looking at us and I said, you can't grab my, ooh, in front of the weird guy,

because he might come over and try to attack us. So very hyper aware of lesbians safety, and we're in public. So we'll hold hands in the city, because the city feels pretty safe. But if I see somebody that just looks a little bit like, we'll hold hands in the city because the city feels pretty safe, but if I see like, you know, like somebody that just looks a little bit off, I'll drop her hand

because I just don't want one more reason to give like a coup in the York City to approach us. So maybe we overcompensate for PDA in places we feel safe. Okay. Because we feel like we have to kind of, like we are always on guard. If that, does that make sense? I have some questions. We have to talk about what kind of like we are always on guard. If that does that make sense?

I have some questions. We have to talk about what types of PDA it is. Is this just a kiss on the cheek? Is it a French kiss? Are we grabbing crutches? Are we grabbing titties? Define for me what if you're in a safe space for lesbians? And in the lesbianism field secure,

describe for me what type of PDA that you and your wife engage in and then we're going to give you our feedback on it. Handholding. Okay. Um, like definitely like hugs. Um, a lot of time, Tate like hugs me from behind. If that makes sense, and I'm not trying to make like sexual any window, you know what I'm telling you what you mean.

Yeah. Um, lots of kisses on the cheeks. OK. Kisses on lips, but I'm not like a tongue early. So I never want to make a French kiss happen. Like even in private. I'm like, OK, that's enough. OK, OK.

Yeah. It's just, it doesn't a tongue just feel, honestly, I've had it with the tongue there and kissing. I just feel like it's so middle school like you're trying to prove that you get it in. Like, we're almost together 10 years. Just give me a kiss, like just use your lips and keep a move in.

You're naming me like, right? I don't know time for this tongue. So that's basically it. She, I never forget this, but she is a boob-grabber. And she almost forgets that she's doing it. And I have to always remind, but I'm always like shutting that down. Right. And then when we do love of the Gina Pinch,

but that is, we know that's naughty. And like that's like a little like secret, like, we, we, we, we have, it's almost like, we know we're doing something bad. So we're not just like freely, what do we call it? Yeah, I guess we call it, Gina, Gina pinches. So you're not just Gina pigeon, as you're walking down the street,

you have to be in a super duper safe place. Yeah, so I call, we call my vagina, Pugina, because it's Pudgey. And then, her vagina is, it's good, Gina, because it's skinny or, or it's the vagina, because it's skinny or or so, a vagina because it's felt so we'll just she'll just be like, put your thine, you know, and then it's almost like a karate chop.

Right. It's more like just like teenagers playing grab. That's kind of thing. I think all your BDA, I don't have too big of a problem. Yeah, I don't either. I don't have too big of a problem. And we've kind of made some exceptions in a lot of our rules. Like we have a rule that we've had it with couples sitting on the same side of the booth.

We just recently updated our permanent record to exclude gay and lesbian couples from this because they're already under attack enough. So if you and your wife sit on the same side of the booth, we're not going to be seeing you next Tuesdays today about it because we've grown. Right. We've evolved and we're enlightened over here at I've had it. Only straight people can't do that. Only straight people. Straight people. Get the fuck out. Okay, we're going to play a game with you called had it or hit it. So if you don't like it, had it, if you like it, hit it. Oh my God. Welcome to had it or hit it. I would hit it. Had it. Had it.

I hit it every day sometimes twice a day. Okay, Taylor. Had it or hit it, songs. Oh, how so sick of it. Hate them. It's like did a floss for your ass. I don't like it. I agree.

Also TMI, but what abs? Don't we all? I have hemorrhoids. Are you kidding me? You're like, and here's a little secret about roids to all of you. Spritely things that have never experienced them, they never officially go away.

So I don't need a pair of underwear. That's like the mortal enemy of something that's attached to my body. So that's an OGO. Yeah, I agree. Had it or hit it erotic dreams. Had it. Really?

I am the prudest lesbian you'll ever meet. I like, I just, you know what they make me? So when my wife has them, I've had it because then she wants to have sex and it's like I'm so happy you're sleeping, bringing Reminded you that we, bringing a reminder to do that. We haven't done this in a while. So.

And then like she woke up this morning, she's like, I had a dream that would be had sex. I was like, well, I hope that satisfied you because we're at my parents' house. And it's like, love, I don't feel like members here have sex. I will die. So.

And then I don't know. I, so I very rarely have a lot of dreams, but when I do, I, like they can get steamy, but like I always, and like frustrated in the dream, trying to get to the orgasm. And so I just like,

there's no satisfaction. Do you know what I mean? And I'm not gonna wake up and masturbate because I don't know how to do that. So, I like glued-laid myself. So I'm not, I'm not here. Okay, I just have quick follow-up question. When you do have these rather frustrating erotic dreams,

yes, are they with men or with women? Oh, I guess. If they're with a woman, it's usually with my wife, which I know sounds like bullshit, but I'm like, I always say like I'm straight, I'm just in love with my wife. So I guess it would be, it would be men, it would be men, but don't tell my wife, she gets so mad.

Oh. I like a bisexual dream. I like Taylor that you're not just over the moon having all kinds of erotic dreams. I've only had one in my whole life. And around here, everybody has them, like, in multitudes of 10. Tell her who your dream was with. Okay, so I've only had one in my whole life. I was on ambient just for the record. And it was with two women that happened to

be twin sisters, which I know is weird. They were women basketball players at the time. So she gives me shit about the insesstual lesbian dream, but it was a hot dream I mean it was a total go all the way here, but I'm just glad I'm not the only I feel sexually repressed when I leave here sometimes when it's like Oh my god, we have like 2030 40 50 wet dreams a year and I'm like really something must be wrong with me Well, it's because you Because you're in the closet. That's what's wrong. That's what's wrong.

Exactly, Taylor. I've been diagnosing this. Our listeners have jumped in. I just think, I mean, the dream that you had, Poms, Ambien or not, is this gay is it gets? It just doesn't get any fucking gayer than that. And there's one thing I have to tell you, Taylor, that is a very important detail. It is the soul, solitary, wet dream that this 53 year old woman has had in her entire life. Furthermore,

she watches softball like a net. No, it's all the stereotypes because I'm a huge supporter of Lesbians. I love Lesbians. My favorite pickleball partners are Lesbians. My hot podcast knows is a lesbian. That's how big of an ally I am. I'm thinking she is. I'm do you try this Subaru? No, I'm not. I'm not going to I am. I'm a gas lighter and I'm thinking she is.

Hums, do you drive a Subaru? No, I do not drive a Subaru. I do not. I'm gonna catch you one. No, we're not getting me a Subaru. All right, all right. Had it, had it or hit it, McDonald's. Hit it, hit it, hit it.

Now, I'm not sexual about sex, but I am sexual about McDonald's. I love McDonald's too. I like the fries. I don't like the other stuff, but I do love those french fries. The fries are good because they're salty, I feel like. Yeah. And you can actually when you order, like at the place, now it's all like touch screen, or like if I post mates, McDonald's at least once a week. I think the most interesting thing ever. But you can add salt to it, which I always do. And I get a number seven, which is two cheeseburgers.

I have one because it was epic. And then the next morning, if I'm hungover, which is usually always because I love to drink, you dig it in the microwave. In the paper, this is a Chrissy Tegan tip for 35 to 40 seconds. It comes out hot and melty like the cheese and like a little pillow of McDonald's heaven.

It is to die. So I love it. I hit it. Okay. All right. Had it or hit it, nose picking. Hit it. I'm a hitter.

I love a good nose pick. Don't worry at all. Don't worry at all. I'm a hitter. I love a good Don't we all don't we everybody yeah? Don't we all love to pick our nose? I mean just to get it all cleaned out get all the crust out. Yeah, I mean, I like all that shit We're trying to bring like we're trying to platform and normalize nose picking in private right in tub like but in private and putting it in a clean X no like wiping it places or flicking it like my kids used to do when they were little. They would flick it at me. I'm like, really?

We oppose burger flicking. Burger flicking is out that I've had a podcast. I have a question. Okay. Does it count? So is it considered private? It fits in your car. Because you know, that's the debate.

It's like, because it's technically in public. No. But it's in your own space. No, I would say that that is public. And we all know that when you pull up to an intersection and you look over and somebody's just full blown, you know, dumpster dive in in their nose, you don't, you don't want to think about anybody else's boogers. That's disgusting. Your boogers are very satisfying and personal to the picker. Anybody else's boogers I've completely had it with, I want no part of it. See, I have absolutely zero conscience issues. If I sit up there and just pick my nose in the car,

I'm like, fuck it, it's my car. I'm not flicking it on them. I don't care if they love it. So you get busted. Yeah, I'm sure I do. And I'm just like, I'm like, I'm in flicking it on them. I don't care if they love it. Yeah, I'm sure I do. I'm just like, I'm in my car. If I've got a good one up there, I'm going in in the car.

The greatest thing about Pams is her give effect meter has been broken for years. And it is so, it is the best. Okay, last one. Had it or hit it, late in life lesbianism. Okay, you heard obviously hit it. I love that. When you first told us that, we were like, oh my gosh, Jennifer's always like pumps, like a tailor. Yeah, be tailor. Yeah, I do. I think I think that you are a shining light of exemplary lifestyle for pumps to follow

suit and she's not that sexual. You're not that sexual. She's a nose picker. You're a nose picker. She found her soulmate. I think you could find yours. I think there's just been, we just went to lunch before we filmed this. And she was like, we were talking about her ex-husband. And she was like, you know, I just think in the future, I mean, I don't really want to date anybody, but I would just be so cheesy. And then I let her go down that rub in my mind. I just thought, if you opened it up to women, it's going to be a whole new ball game. Hold the ball game. I so coastline this, Poms. Like, I am telling you, it's like, we really have a lot of similarities. And I think that the I am telling you, it's like, we really have a lot of similarities. And I think that the, I think the lack of like the sexual dreams and stuff,

I think that I was suppressed because I remember when I was married to Wasbend. So my therapist when I was married to Wasbend got me out of my marriage to him. He was like the greatest. But like pretty shortly thereafter, I kept seeing my therapist after we were separated. I was like, I'm strangely attracted to my friend who's a lesbian. I only have one lesbian friend and I now that I'm like a free bird and I'm like on the road to divorce and I can do whatever I want. I want to make out with her. And he was like, I'm not surprised at all. And I was like, but I'm not even sexual. That seems like there's like

heterosexual and then there's like bisexual feels like black diamond skin. Right. I mean, and so he was like, no, he said, I think that you, like you're, like you're very asexual, but I think it's because you've been so repressed by like you're upbringing the Catholic church. Yeah, da, da, da, da. So he said, I don't think you even let yourself go there.

Like, but you're a big lesbian. Because you're like, he said to me. That's exactly what I say to pops. You're a big lesbian. Yeah, I do. Taylor, this has been a total treat. It's so effortless to talk to you. It is.

I love how self-aware you are, funny you are, self-deprecating, you have our kind of humor. And I love the example that you're setting for my friend, pumps, who I've just recently nicknamed Judy Diana. Always a different nickname. Now Taylor, you are so much fun. I totally understand why everybody loves your show. Oh, thank you so much.

I feel the same way about you guys. I mean, I know we can't like podcast together like all the time because we like have businesses to run but like I'm here anytime you need me and like vice versa. I'm obsessed with you guys. Seriously. You're so great. Thanks so much, Taylor. Thanks for taking time. Yes. Bye. Well, pumps, there is inspiration all around. She's a breath of fresh air.

I mean, she really is just easy. I love that she's going through vlogging her grocery trip and the whole time we had to call around on that. We could not let that go. I mean, here's the deal. I love to beat up on the suburbs. I love to beat up on shit. I love to trash talk shit. But when she was kind of trying to defend the crazy looks she was getting when she's running around whispering with her cell phone, vlogging in a grocery store. It doesn't matter if that's in an urban area or suburban area. She's the problem. I just love her so much.

I love that she immediately goes, y'all are right. A media, I'll take the L. Yeah, she took the L like a champ. She took the L like a lesbian. Listener, go to Apple review, give us five stars. We have a goal to try to get to 10,000 reviews, so please help us meet that. Patreon, all the extra content that you want.

We post on there two to three times a week, hot shit to her, all the stuff that you wanna do with us. Voice mimos, I've had it account. Voice had it with. Voice to the Instagram. And then punch you tell them, Judy Diana. See you next Tuesday. Bye. Bye. What's how to win? What's how to win? What's how to win? What's how to win? What's how to win? What's how to win? What's how to win?

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