I've Had It - Kink Shame MAGA

Episode Date: January 29, 2026

Jay Jurden joins the 'Beavis and Buthead of podcasting' to browbeat DL demon queens.Get tickets to see I've Had It LIVE in Atlanta, Georgia, THIS WEEKEND: https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast.Thank you to our sponsors:Rocket Money: Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at https://RocketMoney.com/HADIT.Follow Us:I've Had It Podcast: @IvehaditpodcastJennifer Welch: @mizzwelchAngie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumpsSpecial Guest: Jay Jurden @JayjurdenSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

So are we supposed to start the podcast? Ready, one, two, three. Patriots, gay, it's, they triots, black, trots, brown triots, and everybody that's in Maga, we've had it with you and you can. Fuck oh! Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with is this new thing on my Instagram, which makes me not want to be on Instagram anymore, where it's constantly, as I'm scrolling, it'll put an ad up and

it'll say, are you interested in this? And so at first I was like, no, I'm not interested in this, like responding to the survey in real time. But I just keep getting it. And so now I think by saying I'm not interested, they're doing it more because I'm interacting. So it makes me not even want to get on Instagram anymore because it's constantly, I mean, surveying me. I'm answering. I'm trying to say no, but they just keep pounding me with this.

And I didn't notice this in Biden's America. I'll just say that. Well, I think it's going to the unsolicited capitalism and buggery from the cell phone, regardless of who is president, that is going to continue. I mean, like we are living in this whole new world with all of this stuff. And I mean, the thing is to, like, when I think about social media in general, and who owns it. Yeah.

It's so depressing. I wish we all had the balls just to get off of it. Right. You know what I mean? Like Instagram, Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, Piss boy, submissive to Donald Trump. He's a submissive kept woman. My Apple phone. Hate it.

You can't live without it. Tim Cook, submissive, made a trophy, a part of the hive mind, had to go kiss Donald Trump's ass. Amazon. Wish I could boycott it. I've tried a couple times. I don't have the distance. I suck. And he's a piss boy that is submissive to the needs of Donald Trump. And Twitter, I mean, do we even have to get into Elon Musk and his obsession with tweeting about me, the podcast, weird?

So I don't know. I just, I have this tortured thing with like, I hate Instagram, but I also like Instagram. I hate Twitter, but sometimes I get on there. I hate my Apple phone because I hate Tim Cook, but then I'm on it all the time. And then I hate being in America. Sometimes I hate being an American, but I live here. But I also love it. And then sometimes I can tap into this pride where I'm like, we got to fight for it. And then other times I'm like, God damn it, fuck it. It's just really, really difficult time right now.

And I say that and I'm a privileged person. Right. And so I don't even want to imagine what it's like being an immigrant or even having melanin your skin and how. this Gestapo is unleashed on you. And I mean, if I'm struggling, which is I'm being a pussy for even saying that, I'm acknowledging it, listener. I get it. I can't imagine the fear that you live in day in, day out, and then you have to live around a bunch of people. I have no empathy for you and for your plight. Well, and I think this whole Trump administration,

the gaslighting, the whiplash, it's like emotional abuse on steroids. It's like sometimes I get these had it's in my head, which was what we originally started with this podcast. And then I think what you really should be worried about is people losing health care, is people losing the ability to have their own reproductive care. And then it just becomes massively overwhelming. You know what I mean? So it's like, I feel like I need to be fighting all the time. But yet at the same time, it overwhelms me when I get too far into it. Like I got on a thing with Mark Zuckerberg the other day like just because I hate on Elon Musk and uh Jeff Bezos and what they have done like like I breathe it's just part of the day and I and I was like you know I've really let

Mark Zuckerberg off the hook that fucking kind needs to be raked over the coals at all times because he is neutered when he it just it sent me into orbit and then I just thought you you just have to let you have to let that go because it makes you crazy sometimes i feel crazy yeah um all right let me tell what i've had it with i've had it with the administration inventing something that then they claim to be uh uh bringing back and most recently they've started this whole like whole milk campaign and i it's like like the the gist of it is like there's been a liberal war on milk and rfk Junior is bringing back milk. So they've got Pudding Boy, you know, whose brain is so cooked beyond all recognition.

I mean, it is so bad that he's in there doing some milk show and tell in the Oval Office. And then they start this whole thing, this like got milk campaign. Here's the thing that gets me about this is they're so painfully unoriginal. like the whole got milk campaign where you take a drink of milk and then you have the milk mustache predates the mag of movement yeah but these guys are so imbecilic and so painfully unoriginal they start this like there's been a war on milk and we're going to rescue milk and then they roll at the exact they borrow everybody else's material because these people are so painfully unoriginal they plagiarize everything they plagiarize absolutely everything

And then they start this Got Milk campaign and it's Riley Gaines. The, there she is right there. Of course. Drink whole milk. This thing has been done before. And this is a woman right here, Riley Gaines. And we need to talk about her. This is a woman who tied for fifth place against a trans athlete.

And now she has a whole career because she spoke out and demeaned trans people. At the same time, Riley Gaines has, goes on and on about what a big Christian she is and how close she and the Lord are and how she is a foot soldier for Jesus Christ and she has her own relationship with her Lord and personal Savior Jesus Christ and she's for family values and all of this shit. Riley Gaines is a pedophile supporter. Riley Gaines is a pedophile apologist. Riley Gaines is not for children because she is for Donald Trump and thus for Stephen Miller, who who are for abusing children,

who are for taking children away from their families. Riley Gaines is one of the worst Christians in the United States of America. She is a bald-faced liar. She sends a message to young ladies that somehow she's a good person and it's all bullshit. She is a world-class hater that uses her religious. to try to provide a permission structure for all the white yoga moms that go to Starbucks and gossip about other people's kids because that's how shallow they are, to go along with the moral depravity of this administration in the name of Jesus Christ.

It is appalling. It is an affliction among white women to not critically think, to believe that you're supposed to be submissive to your, husband when the most submissive people in the United States of America right now are these MAGA men. I have never seen such submissive titty babies in my life. And honestly, Riley Gaines is far more submissive to MAGA, the morally depraved cult than she is to her own husband, or she is to her Lord and personal Savior, Jesus Christ. The breathtaking hypocrisy of this woman is absolutely reminiscent of the lot of the tropes surrounding white women.

And her, Erica Kirk, and others that give white women a permission structure to not have empathy for other human beings and to buy into this bullshit that you're supposed to be submissive to your husband. When your husbands are submissive to a man that wears a full face of makeup every year. single day and whose brain is cooked, Fubar cooked. It's unbelievable how hypocritical these people are. And here's the thing, the Riley Gaines are going to remain after this man is dead. Right. We've all seen him. The death is imminent, right? The Riley Gaines, the Erica, Erica, Kirk's,

these people remain, and they are injecting this breed of hateful Christianity into the culture and listener, we have to have a response to this. It's not cool to vote for a man who is in the middle of a pedophile ring. It's not cool to excuse child rape. It's not Christian to excuse child rape. It's not Christian to bully trans people. Now, I'm not a Christian. And why I have that moral clarity and Riley Gaines, who will not shut the fuck up about

what a big Christian she is is something that is, really got to be addressed in this culture. And so to all the white women that go to all these mega churches and tithe, and don't give a shit about anything except for your own little family, when your husband's probably on Grindr, I mean, let's face it, he's probably watching trans porn while you're rocking the baby at night. All right. I mean, you have got to pull yourselves together,

because if you think you're going to be safe in this movement, ladies, you're not. The Riley Gaines, the Erica Kirk's, all these Fox News people are writing the coattels of brave suffragettes and brave feminists that carved a path for you to be able to be the hypocrite that you are, to say you're for family values, and to say that I want to be a homemaker and that all women should be a homemaker while you work full-time. Brave progressive women and fought for you to be the abject, fake Christian hypocrite that you are. So Riley Gaines and Erica Kirk and all of these women, I want white women across the country to unite against these hypocrites and remind them

constantly that you're allowed to be the hypocrite that you are because of progressive women, you fucking twads. I've had it. I've had it too. And the Riley Gaines of it all, It's like, and Erica Kirk, too, I'll put them both. They, like you said, you know, Homemaker, we need to have babies. We need to do all this. It's like Erica Kirk didn't have her first baby until she was 35, okay? She was on a Bravo reality show called Summer House, which is like a dating house. Riley Gaines and Jim Jordan have the exact same thing in common.

They allowed abuse on the teams of which they were on and or in charge of. And then they sit there and act like trans people or Riley Gaines acts like trans person's the problem. You have a career because you decided I can have a career that makes me hateful. The more hateful I am, the more followers I will get. I will give advice to women and completely ignore the fact that I'm doing the exact opposite. It's so fucking gross. And I just, I cannot for the life of me. understand how Riley Gaines and Erica Kirk do not see the duplicity that they are engaging in.

Women should stay home. They should submit to their husband. Yet I'm going to go around the country and be a working mom and I'm going to work full-time, but I'm going to tell women they shouldn't. I'm going to tell women they should submit to their husband, but I'm going to do whatever the fuck I want and get on Fox News and Browby AOC. It just the hypocrisy and it's like what I I relate it back to just from my perspective is, as long as I'm doing it, it looks prettier.

As long as I'm doing it, it's okay. It's when other people do it, that it's not okay. And that is something that I was indoctrinated with my entire life in these big, you know, Christian evangelical churches. What it looks like on other people, it looks better on me because I'm better. I can judge. I'm entitled. It's all about me.

But yeah, the Riley Galeigh... I mean, I could go from here until my head fell off about Erica Kirk and Riley Gaines and all the shit they say that they do the exact opposite. And everybody just acts like that. Oh, yeah, well, that's just what you do. Well, it is what you do. And these evangelical circles, that is what you do. All right. Welcome to I've had it.

America's Top DEI podcast. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. Kylie. I'm Kylie. the head lesbian in charge. That's right. Okay, I've got a couple reviews for you.

We're going to start it off with this one. It says five stars comes with side effects. And they write, I've had it has officially rewired my brain, and I regret nothing. I'm a North Jersey girl, and I listen so much that I know casually drop phrases like 12 times out of 10, surprises me zero, and buck up buttercup, tight as ticks, and enough to choke a bull,

into everyday conversation like their normal human expressions. I've also found myself in political conversations referring to kanks, Moses Mike Grindr Johnson, and chuckles, which has resulted in multiple people staring at me like I've escaped supervision. Worth it. The most alarming side effect, I recently taught myself, caught myself saying Thursday, out loud, confidently, in public, no shame. This podcast is hilarious, cathartic, and dangerously quotable,

If you enjoy laughing, nodding aggressively, learning something, and slowly losing the ability to speak like a regular person, congrats. This podcast is for you. Surprises me, Zero, that I love it from Karen. I really like that she signed her first and last name. I do too. You know, that's in a world on the internet of chicken shit cowards hiding behind some bogus avatar and bogus profile description bio. That Karen right there, she is the anti-Karon. She said her first and last name and then her city and state lover.

Okay. Now to bring you down, just a peg, we've got a one star that says just cringe and guess Nelling writes the beavis and butthead for post menopausal winos. See, here's the thing. I would respect that so much more if we didn't have a chicken shit coward. First and last name. And here's the thing. on top of calling out, pointing out to Riley and Erica and others,

Caroline Levitt would be another prime example. A lot of progressive women fought hard for you to be the duplicitous hypocrite that you are. I want to remind these trolls. Right now we're going to start a movement to liberate your real identity. I'm going to start a movement to where if you want to be a chicken shit coward online, you've got to sign your name up to it. You want to call me Beavis and Butthead? Buckle up, Buttercup. Let's fucking do it. Put your name down. I'm Jennifer Welch, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, recently moved to New York City. I think you're a chicken shit coward. What's your name? Because Karen did it. She wasn't scared. I'm so tired of these fucking nameless, faceless, puss boys. Because you know, that's just probably some pink arm in there and some Red County that at night, you know, all day, are you a man or woman?

Right. Do you know what? How many genders are there? How many genders are there? And then at night it's like tissue, lotion, trans porn. You know it. 12 times out of 10. 12 times out of 10. I will say when we get on Fox News and we get a plethora of like death threats in our email,

most of them are very chicken shit and they'll make up an email that's like, fuck Jennifer Welch at gmail.com. Yeah. And they'll put a fake. name, but some of them are really stupid and we'll put their actual email. Well, I respect that far more. Right. I mean, here's reality.

These people have no courage. They have no honor. They don't really believe in anything but attacking the libs. So it's hard for them to assign their name because they don't know what their belief or what they're going to be mad about tomorrow because Donald Trump and Fox News haven't told them yet. So they can't sign their names because they're fucking cowards. Okay. I've got a couple news stories that some listeners have flagged for me.

This one is new research found that young adults with overly involved parents have less prestigious jobs than their peers. And it goes on to say helicopter parenting doesn't end at high school. And your research suggests it may come with unintended negative career consequences. Researchers followed U.S. adults aged 18 to 28 for up to a decade, repeatedly surveying them about family relationships and work outcomes. The pattern was consistent. Parents who frequently advised, closely monitoring decisions, and stayed highly involved, appeared to make it harder for their children to fully launch into the labor market. And it also says this group of kids typically had lower occupational prestige than the peers with parents who took a step back. This does not surprise me at all. I mean, I just think helicopter parenting is it's so bad. and having a son that just graduated from high school, the group me, the parent group me was just so

torturous for an 18 year old that can drive, that can vote, who's about to go off to college, and that hyper-parent involvement to me is a symptom that these parents are completely broken. Like, if there's this need to have this overwhelming and meshed, codependent relationship with your child, you're the broken one and you are breaking your child. And it's just a cultural thing that we need to deal with this. And then I feel so bad for like the normal parents. I remember like I had to work. I don't have time to be a helicopter parent.

I had to provide health insurance and a roof over the head. I didn't have time to be at helicopter parents. So when I would go pick up my kids from after school club, then sometimes these moms that didn't have to work would say, oh, there's no way I could send my kids to after school club. And I'm like, well, what a fucking luxury. What a luxury that your little puss boy doesn't have to go to after school club. But the reality is a lot of people have to work.

And the mom guilt is the same regardless. But I mean, I'm really relieved to see a lot of this stuff because I was not a helicopter parent and I had to sacrifice. I'm not one of these parents that could attend everything. And the reality parenting that I had to give my children is to say it's not reality base that I go to every single one of these events. And society tells me this new world of helicopter pairing that I should feel bad about that. But really, there's a lesson here.

There's a lesson for me to sit down with you and clasp your hands and say, I'm unable to make this. And this is adulthood. And this is what it's like. But your grandparents are coming. And so I love you, but I have to work. And I've always done that with my kids. And my boys are feminist, like believe in female empowerment. And there's just, and being honest with your kids is just such a better platform for them

to be able to go navigate adulthood than all of the parental fluffery. You're so special. You're so great. It's just like, of course, our kids are special to us and they're unique to us, but they're wholly, not unique at all, just like I'm not that unique. Just like Pimes and Kylie were not that unique. There's seven billion people in this world. I mean, it's just American parenting is so fucked up to me.

Didn't we have like an article on here one time, Kylie, we're like 20% of these people, their parents have contacted their boss, either by email or impersonate. It was just like a ridiculous percentage. So it makes sense that job, you know, employers don't want interference from a third party. And it also makes sense these people can't make decisions for themselves.

because if Kylie's mother or Seth's mother called me and said something, I would immediately call Jennifer and say, we've got to get an exit strategy for Kylie, like her fucking mother called me. Like that would be the first thing I would do because I would think that was so weird. So good that it's finally coming out. Okay, and then one other one that was flagged is pretty interesting.

It says GLP-1s could save U.S. Airlines about 580 million in fuel per year. year. It goes on to say, airlines are obsessive about keeping costs low and take creative steps to lighten their loads. According to the report, United started printing its airline magazine on lighter paper, and that move saved them $290,000 in fuel costs. So if on average passengers who weighed 180 pounds now weighed about 162 pounds, it could save them up to $580 million in fuel savings per year. I think the airlines should be buying GLP ones for people. I'm just going to say, you're welcome airlines. I've done my part. I've stood up for the cause. And this is just another thing. Trump is constantly calling people fat and saying, talking about they need to be on GLP ones or

they've been on GLP ones. And I'm just like, do you have a mirror at your house? That just reminded me of that. But again, I'm obsessed. I need to stop. A Christmas miracle has taken place. So we decided to go do a live show in Atlanta on January 31st. And we were for sure like the ticket sales are going to be lacklester. Nobody's going to become, I'll be damned if it didn't sell out in like a couple of days. So the organizer was like you should do another day. And I'm like, it's a pretty big, pretty big ass. Pretty big app for two old broads like us.

Right. So we added an additional day. Ticket sales were getting about close to halfway February 1st, center stage. in Atlanta, and it is also a matinee, because we are going to normalize matinees. We are going to normalize a reasonable start time. We're not going to start a show at 8 or 9 p.m. And you're going to- It's past bedtime. Wake up the next day feeling hungover, strung out,

why did I hang out with all of these radical leftists, anti-fascists? We're not going to do that because we're pro-matine, we're pro-democracy, we're anti-Maga, and we're anti-fascists. Come see us. It's going to be so fun. I love getting together at a live show with all of the people. It's such a community. Listener, I don't know about you guys, but I'm constantly signing up for subscriptions or memberships that I don't need. I just need them in the short term. Like, let's say there is a publication and they have a great article behind a paywall. So I think, okay, sure, I'll sign up for this subscription. I'll cancel it right after I read it. We'll end up not doing that. Same thing for some other various memberships where you get a free 30 day trial.

I think, okay, I'll cancel it in 30 days. Of course, I totally forget about it. So I'm just wasting money every single month using things that I don't need. That's why I want to introduce you guys to Rocket Money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. I personally have already canceled 12 memberships and subscriptions that I do not use just in the last week since downloading Rocket Money. So, listener, let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster.

Join RocketMoney.com slash had it. That's rocketmoney.com slash had it. RocketMoney.com slash had it. All right. Let's welcome our guest to I've had it. had it. He is a comedian, a writer, and actor. Let's welcome Jay Jurdon to I've had it. Jay, how are you today? Hello, I'm doing really well. How are y'all? Great. Excellent. The last time I saw you was in New York at the Don Lemon Show. Yes. And you and I were guests. And I think we crushed it.

We crushed it. We tried not to outshine Don, but I think we might have. We really, I mean, Don and Anthony, they really had to step to the side and let the true divas. And let the true divas. take over at City Winery. There was one woman who had a question and it was so slurred that we did have to remind everyone we are at a winery. So we would need someone to interpret because she was a couple of flights deep. Yeah, she definitely was. All right, Jay, what have you had it with? I have had it with comedians being soft on Nazis. Oh my God. There used to be a blanket an agreement that we would make fun of Nazis, neo-Nazi winks and nods at the stupid-ass stuff that happened in World War II.

But now people like Theo Vaughn say Nick Fuentes is brave. I don't get it. It truly boggles my mind. There used to be a baseline sort of like bedrock agreement that, hey, we're going to make fun of Nazis because it's a stupid ideology. It's a self-hating, a self-destructive, and a just an in-eat. accurate ideology. And for now, and for some reason, now comedians think it's okay to be like, yeah, that self-described Nazi was brave? What? It just doesn't make any sense to me. It doesn't

make any sense. That's a really good point because I did see a clip the other day of Theo Vaughn. And these are the people, the Theo Vons and the Joe Rogans that straddle two worlds. Sometimes you'll see Theo Vaughn say something really rational and really good. Like the I think they used a footage of him and he was offended and he stood up and it was like okay moral clarity Joe Rogan recently said you know the Isis in Minneapolis is acting like the Gestapo and I'm like okay moral clarity but then if you if you get out of the 30 second clips of these people they're very dangerous because they dip their toes in both sides all of the time which enables them to promote a lot of these really

dangerous things. And Nick Fuentes is a fucking neo-Nazi that deserves to be ridiculed and read for filth all day, every day. There's nothing about him as brave. He should be a social pariah. Right. Totally. His name should ruin your reputation if you stand too close to him. Fiavon and Joe Rogan also have this connection to Latin America and to non-white people. Joe Rogan's wife is not a white person. Theo Vaughn's father came from Latin America. We, you know, he was, you know, he was older and he came to Louisiana, but they both have connections to groups of people that would basically bar them from being welcomed

into like a true Nazi ideology and like a true kind of like super strict white supremacy fold. They kind of like get in and out of it. And sometimes people use the cover of, oh, they're just. comedians. But one of things that comedians usually understand is you understand if you are the joke or if you're in on the joke. And they've also become the joke. You're a laughing stock if you can't point to something that uses like belatent Nazi ideology and blatant Nazi, like, not even dog whistles, just clear like references and say, hey, I don't like that. That's kind of horrible. Get that out of my fucking face. Can we discuss the video of Nick Fuentes and the

Tate brothers and some other people with melanin in their skin that we can refer to as DEI Nazis that are singing inward Heil Hitler. Yeah. Kanye West song. And every single one of those motherfuckers, if they lived in Nazi Germany, would be sent away to concentration camps in this weird flirtation, marginalized people with white nationalism. The Tate brothers are either one fourth or half. Black. Myron Gaines is Sudanese. Nick Fuentes is Latino and clavicular has ADHD and is autistic.

All of them will be put into the undesirables pile. They all would be on a train. It is so scary to think that seventh grade back of the classroom logic, which is just you say the slur to distract the teacher and to make your horrible friends laugh and giggle at something that's taboo. That cannot be the leading political ideology for young men online. And it cannot be tolerated. I'm glad that the hospitality groups in Miami banned them from everything in Miami, but I think there have to be bigger steps. People who are in entertainment, people who have the ears and the eyes and the reach of young men online have to basically not only disavow these statements, they have to never work with them again

from a Twitch streaming standpoint. And they also have to say, hey, you guys, this is stupid. And if we look at Scott Galloway, this is what's ruining young man. It's not women saying, oh, I don't want to go on a date with you. It's this. Right. I'm sorry. It's so, it's, and I'm a person who really does try to go, oh, let me see where, where

is the joke in this? Because I can look at it emotionally, but I can also think critically, where is the joke? The joke here for some reason is that they want to upset people by doing a Nazi salute. And they think that people being upset by them doing Nazi Sig Heil. is the joke. As a comedian, as a person who writes jokes, as a person who's written jokes for other people, that's not just the lowest hanging fruit. That is on the ground. That is on the bottom of someone's shoe. Well, it's not smart. The best comedy is smart. Yeah. It's not smart. Okay, I have a question. I'm dying to ask a comedian and you're it. What's going on with Trump and his administration,

like let's just take the cabinet meetings, for example. Like, if you were going to write a joke and do a parody, reality is worse than anything you could come up with. So how has that challenged you as a comedian? Because what's happening is funnier, like in a dangerous way, I'll be. Yeah. Than the parody. Yeah. Well, there's something, basically that's the idiot plot where the only way the plot moves

forward from a comedic standpoint is if people keep making mistakes. So you have this sort of hapless group of individuals and none of them can seem to get their heads out of their asses. So that's what's going on now. But I would think the only way to make this kind of washable and funny is you have to find one adult in the room. And we see this happen sometimes. And I'm not, I'm not, he's not a great person. We see this happen sometimes with Jerome Powell. We see, we see Jerome Powell go, wait, what? No. We've seen it with Marco Rubio. We saw Marker Rubio with the note. Wait, hold that. We saw Marker Rubio. We saw Marker Rubio. We saw Markerubio. We saw Markerubio.

We saw Marco Rubio gave, we saw Marco Rubio gave Trump a note that Trump was supposed to do the directions on the note, but Trump read the Noah out loud. So every now and then, we see them break character because they go, of course, of course, I respect this man. But every now and then, because the cameras are rolling constantly because he wants the presidents to be a reality TV show, they have to do a basically gym from the office direct to camera and go, oh my God. Oh my God. Not only is he incontinent, he's incompetent. It's in, I, it's insanely heavy-handed writing. If you presented this to your head writer and you worked on a TV show, they would go, no, this is way too sloppy. We did the Greenland Iceland joke three times

and 20 seconds in Davos. It's not, no, no one's that stupid. They go, this, this character is. And it's, Angie, I'm so glad that you asked about it from a comedy standpoint, because so much of this is tied to comedy, they want to memeify the White House. They want to troll people online.

This all started because Seth Myers and Barack Obama made fun of him one time at the White House correspondent. And they wanted to take comedy back. It's why Tony Hitchcliff wanted to do the Madison Square Garden Show. It's why they say, oh, comedy's back. It's why Elon says, oh, we can make comedy great again. We can finally laugh at things again. They all are losers who were laughed at.

And now they think, have you? Okay, have you ever seen someone who someone, they're not that cool? And they think, oh, when I finally get some power, I'm going to do what a cool person does. But because they were never cool, they have no idea what cool people actually do. Right. They have no idea what actually goes on. They were not getting dates. They were not making out under the bleachers.

They were at home coming up with lists of people that they're going to make more money than or like people they're going to screw over. When you look, you look at any old picture of Jeff Bezos looking at any old picture of Elon Musk, you know, exactly what kind of pathology is happening right now. It's revenge of the nerds. It's revenge of the nerds. And I'm glad you brought it up because in revenge of the nerds, sadly, I'm sorry, people like that movie, that movie has sexual assault. That's what this is.

Whenever the, whenever the main character sleeps with the girl while he's wearing the mask and she doesn't know it's him, that's what this administration is, these nerds who think they're gonna like take it out on the rest of us. And right, what good is it if you rule over a pile of ashes and rubble? You can't troll your way into World War III and nuclear proliferation and think, oh, yeah, this is great. And the attack on comedians is historically significant. Yeah. All autocrats do this.

They're one of the first to go because they can't have somebody making fun of the autocrat because the ego is so fragile. You know, at the core of this, Elon Musk, Donald Trump, J.D. Yeah. All of these guys are submissive. The one thing they fear more than anything, they are submissive. They submit to their idealized version of masculinity, which is Donald Trump, who wakes up every morning and puts on a full face of makeup. I don't give a fuck if people wear makeup.

Yeah. But Maga does. They care about that shit. I mean, that's one of their big issues. Like, you know, one of their big cuts to me is like, are you a man or a woman? You know, like that's their big thing is buying. gender roles. And these submissive twats, they wake up and worship a man that puts on a full face of makeup every day. And comedians to me right now should be tripling, quadrupling down

and just browbeating the duplicity and hypocrisy of these guys and how they want women to submit because they're tired of submitting to Donald Trump. And then jokes would continue to right themselves, but God, I love browbeating conservatives. I fucking love it. It's so fun. Angie, are you also from Oklahoma? I'm from Mississippi. So to think, to think that this man with soft hands and a full face of makeup is the paradigm in the acme of masculinity as a person. My brother's a truck driver. Okay. I've known loggers. I've known truck drivers. I know oil rig workers. I know men, men. None of them act this way when people have

less power than them and none of them are this childish because they have actual man shit to handle and so if you do they do they do they come home they got to do man shit all day long they do and so it's so funny and it doesn't involve submitting to other men and it doesn't involve lying to an older man who was about to drive us all off of a cliff there used to be this agreed upon sort of rule when it came to at least masculinity that like you stood up for people who were weaker than you. Yes. And you protected those people. And then if someone was equally matched with you, y'all could have it out. Now bullying and cruelty seems to be the only currency that they understand. It's also the only way that they kind of can throw out comedy. When someone is attacked, they think, oh, yeah, get them. They think it's hilarious that Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Kimmel got in trouble with their

their respective networks or it got in a little bit of trouble with the FCC. They think that's so funny. You're battling a comedian. Oh, sure. You're so strong. What a tough guy. You're mad that someone made a few jokes about you. You won the election. You control the free market. And the one thing you're focused about if someone makes a joke about you in their monologue at 1130 at night, that's sad. There are people in this country who are starving. And that's your primary focus. I mean, these men are titty babies. You're from the south. You know what a titty baby.

And they're spoiled, riding, and they're little, these are oil. These are titty babies. And here's the thing that we have to talk about. If you're going to run for political office, if you're going to be a podcast or if you're going to get on the internet, if you're going to be an influence or whatever it is, if you choose to be in public and that's a choice that you make. Yes. Specifically, if you run for president of the United States, you've got to tuck your tail between

your legs and stand up like a man and take that criticism because it's coming for you. And I remember when Barack Obama was president. He visited the state of Oklahoma. I lived in Oklahoma City at the time. I was really excited because presidents generally ignore Oklahoma because it's so red. And so he was coming to Oklahoma and I drove downtown Oklahoma City and he was greeted by a bunch of white, angry, racist with Confederate flags and shouting the N-word, heart. R and I was so ashamed. And you know what? He never said a fucking word about it. Right. Because he ran for president. He chose to get up that day to go to Oklahoma because he was dealing with some sort of, you know, issue there. And he wasn't a victim of it.

He didn't whine and complain and then have an army of titty submissive titty baby hive mind cretons that, you know, elongated the the complaint. So this thing that the pussy is the pussy them in Maga. These men are the biggest bunch of fucking pussies on the planet. And here's what I don't get. You're talking about men in Mississippi that do manly things. The fact that they're like still on board with this

is really weird to me. And also, I want to get your take on all the photoshopped homoerotic images of Trump. It's just a fascinating psychological case. He brought it up in Davos. There is this infatuation with a daddyism and this paternal figure and this return to this like sort of like idealized patriarchy. But guess what?

That ideal patriarch, he provides for his family. And if he's the patriarch of America, he's not providing for this family. He is falling short. He is ruining the country. He was, it's so weird that the first thing they say to any of us who are progressives, they go, they call us gay and then we go, that's not a horrible thing. And we know gay people. I'm queer. Because to them, that's the worst thing in the world, someone who's queer.

It's so odd that they call all of us queer, but all of the AI slop I see is Donald Trump with abs. It's him being like 50 pounds lighter and he's glistening and he's bronze. It's how I'm erotic. It's Jesse Waters saying Daddy's home on Fox News. He said daddy's, he has the nerve to say anything about queer people, but then on TV at his job. He gets his eyebrows filled in and he looks into camera A and says, daddy's home, about a 79 year old? Listen, I'm not going to kinksham, but I don't watch that kind of porn.

I need them to at least be cute. I don't want to watch Jesse Waters go down on Donald Trump every night on Gutfield. That's not, or the five, I don't want to watch that. Yeah, it's gross. Jesse Waters, and he's constantly telling it, real men don't cross their legs. Yeah. Real men don't. And so, and we've seen him in person. And he, I mean, it's the blue black hair guy. It's the sachets.

It's pancake makeup. Yes. So he's the precious thing I've ever seen it. So I think he's hiding something like the rest of Republicans. Okay. What's your take on grinder crashing everywhere Republican congregate? I think that every now and then the ladies, does protest too much. Anyone who's only calling cart and whose only moneymaker is making fun of

trans women and making fun of gay men, they have a vested interest. We've seen this time and time again, whether it's someone having a wide stance at an airport urinal, whether it's someone accidentally having all of this software on their computer. It always happens with these people who are these religious zealots and these puritanical anti-gay legislators and kind of figures on the right. And the reason it is. It's because in their youth, they were told being gay is the worst thing you can be. Being gay is the thing that's going to get you out of heaven. So they fought against it their entire life, but there was that nugget that was gnawing at them, that one truth that they really couldn't escape. And so every now and then incognito mode helped them and then grinder, faceless profiles

help them. But it always comes out. And I don't like focusing on South Carolina senators like this, but happy nuptials to Tim Scott and Lindsay, I think you'll find the right girl one day. I'll tell you what, Lady Graham is just an absolute piece of work. I have never, and Lindsey Graham strikes me as someone who, Lindsey Graham strikes me someone who actually should be able to sort of see the far as for the trees. You've been a senator and you've been involved in U.S. politics this long. You could easily start a pretty disruptive movement to the left of Trump to recalibrate what you think would be the Republican Party.

And everyone that's a kind of traditional journalist and all the legacy media would go to you and kiss the ring and bow your feet and finally be like, thank God someone's being an adult. If you don't believe me, look what happened with John McCain at the end of his life. You do one thing. You don't know on one stupid bill and you will get the, you'll get the framing when you pass away. All the flowers. Complex individual, but at the end of day made the right decision. None of these people have the foresight to see they could do that. Instead, they have tied their anchor to this 79-year-old who's actively sundowning in Switzerland.

He said, if it weren't for the U.S., you'd be speaking German in Switzerland. They do, you piece of shit. You know, back to Lady Graham. So he's really, he's been in Israel lately. And he just posted recently on his Instagram. And he's got a big thumbs up and a big shit eating grin on his face. And he's like, I'm here with the director of Mossad. And I said to Pumps, how much video footage of Lindsay doing gay shit?

Do you think Mossad has? I mean, they've got him doing so much ladybug, gay shit out the wazoo. Massad's like, hey, Lindsay, get your ass over here. Don't you even think about talking about South Carolina, motherfucker. You get over here to hear real right fucking now. And he's like, yes, sir. And we'll have some boy toys for you. And Jennifer and Pumps, y'all imagine people in your home stage,

struggling, the entire U.S. economic like system is going upside down. And you choose to leave your country to go make propaganda for a country that's actively harming brown people in the global South. I don't, I don't understand it. It would be as crazy as if there was an ice storm coming to Texas and they flew to California. There's one. They have evidence of Lindsay doing gay shit. I will always forever believe that because there's just no other logical explanation. Massad has Lindsey Graham doing gay shit. Lindsay Graham was raised evangelical Christian. He has all the shame. Here's the thing. I have always been the biggest. I used to be able to say this back in the day, but I know fruit fly. You know what I was about to say. Yeah. And so I had friends in the

90s that really struggled to tell their parents that they were gay and they lived a closeted life, you know, passively for a while. And I had so much empathy. I had so much empathy for them. It was difficult because I have to go home to their parents who were these horrible evangelical, judgmental Lindsay Graham types, Donald Trump types, J.D. Vance types and just the cruelty of it. And then a lot of them ended up with AIDS and died. I have a lot of empathy for that. But these fucking DL demon queens. Yeah. That actively will not shut the fuck up about masculinity, gay people or trans people.

And women. There's this there's this misogynistic angle that they think the best way to prove that they're stray and to prove that they're not gay is to take away women's right to choose what they want to do with their body. So there's this kind of four pronged. to kind of throw people off the trail. And like you were speaking, I mean, you're just pretty sure to the quiet. I went to old miss and from 2006 all the way to 2012.

So there was there was this small contingent of people who were out, but you know, kind of that old boy, very southern evangelical south. It really constricts people. And to see other people live as free and you know, I think the Democratic Party has made some strides, but sometimes they haven't been nearly as effective or as vocals that want them to be when it comes to help. helping queer people and continuing to press. But I have an entire party, an entire party that used to at least be able to say,

hey, we do have log cabin Republicans. That's not our tent poll issue anymore. We cannot care this much about gay people. Dick Cheney's daughter told us we got to start being nice to y'all. That's what they almost did. And to backslide from that to tell log cabin Republicans, we don't care. They made law caban Republicans look like they were cows voting from. McDonald's. I do not, I do not understand why in 2026 that is the most important thing. And it's

because they have to distract people from, I guess, economic issues and how much they're lying. But it's wild to think about this. It's 2026. And there's still an anti-gay party. That's insane. Well, I think a lot of it has to do with. Have they seen, have they seen, oh, Mary? That's a Republican president. I think we're such a relationship. religious country. And when you talk to Europeans, the purity, puritanical aspect of American culture as opposed to other Western cultures, we're really religious. Women here are like super modest. There's this modesty and this purity culture and this puritanical kind of vibes to it. And so you have a sector of the United States, this very sex obsessed, either sex

obsessed with people not having it, throwing purity balls for their little girls that like, you know, 10 where you know, really weird shit. Really fucking weird shit. Oklahoma and Mississippi, if we look at those porn hub statistics, we know exactly what they're looking at. Okay. Jay, we're going to play a game with you called Had It or Hit It. Okay.

You probably heard of it. You've probably seen it. It's Uber popular. World famous. Oh my God. Welcome to Had It or Hit It. I would hit it. I would hit it.

I hit it every day, sometimes twice a day. All right. Had it or hit it, World War III. Oh, I have had it with World War III. Even before they start the Declaration, I do not need that. I have a lot going on right now. I have two pilots I'm trying to finish. So let's not have World War III. Please, please, just for my sake.

All right. Had it or hit it, Smokey Ice Sociopath, aka the Vice President of the United States, J.D. Vance. Well, he hit it because Usha's pregnant again, allegedly. Do you think IVF? I think IKEA. I think it was a couch. I think he hooked up with Ashley Furniture. Scraped it off.

Yeah, yeah. I think she picked, I think she scraped it off of Erica Kirk's dress. I don't know. Oh. Oh. Oh. I love that you went there. I love that injected into my veins.

That's so good, Jay. We just talked briefly. We've studied a lot of images with him and his eyes. Yeah. And it's kind of gotten to the back of the news cycle because they're escalating the fascism and the Naziism. Yes, yes. But in the early days of this administration, it was kind of quaint because we could. We could talk about eyeliner.

And we really, we did a pretty detailed forensic study pumps in me. And we discovered that we found that little smoky is what we like to call him. He had kind of a day look, an evening look, and a television look. Yeah. With his eyeliner.

I love a look queen. I think he was probably a bit of a scene queen or a scene kid when he was in high school. And also it takes one makeup artist to be like, no, your eyes really pop. with this. Trump has had the same makeup since the 80s and he only does it himself. He puts it on every morning. He can't blend. You know for a fact he does it himself. He refused that. And I think J.D. Vance had a similar experience where someone said, oh, this really makes your eyes pop. And so for the rest of his political career, he's going to be penciling it in and putting on his eye shadow and his eyeliner every day.

And once again, for a party that isn't too keen on gay people, It's a lot of makeup. Right. And here's just a lot of makeup. And here's something else I think that we need to point out. Not only are they super submissive, which is a spear into their uber masculinity thing, but we also need to point out that they are happiest in homo social relationships. Yes.

Not sexual. No. Look at Joe Rogan, Theo Vaughn, look at the whole brosphere. These are people who are happiest. Look at what happened in Miami. That was all boys. Homosocial. There was a specific instance where clavicular, I think, allegedly asked Nick Fuentes if they

wanted to bring girls over and he went, no, this is fine. Nick Fuentes routinely tells people to shun all people, straight guys to shun all female affection and don't get into relationships. Having a girlfriend is gay, which is just kind of like mental judo he's trying to do to his like followers. They only want to live in this kind of like, I don't know, idealized. Is it not really accurate, but mythical Roman culture that is all homosocial, where they all hang out with men. They think that women are just supposed to be vessels for more men.

They think that a woman failed if she had a girl because they aren't contributing to the amount of men in this world where men can quorum and men can go to the bars and hang out and men can have these think takes. And it's so childish. It's such a childish thought. It is the plot of little rascals. They just want a he man woman haters club. And they're all mad that Alpha decided to get a girlfriend. That's what this is. It's bleak.

It's so sad. It's so sad that they think this is the way not only to be successful, but the way to get America. Because I don't know if they know anything, but women have the money. There are more women here. Women live longer. It's so wild to pursue, to pursue strictly male attention when women can make your career politically or an entertainment. But, you know, I don't think

these are the smartest individuals. All right. Had it or hit it, Oklahoma. Oh, oh, okay. So this is tough for me because I have never, I went to Tulsa once. I went to Tulsa once and the mall closed at six. So I have hit it. I have hit it and I will hit it again. I'm currently on tour. We haven't put an Oklahoma date for the new tour. But I've hit it. And, I've hit it. And, I've hit it. And, I'll hit it again. I'm not a Texas fan. That's what you're asking. So no. All right. Had it or hit it, Don Lemon. Oh, I love Don. I haven't hit it. Let those rumors not start. I have. Yeah, Don might have entered that church. He has not entered me. So I love Don Lemon. Hit it, hit it. He is hitting it. He is hitting the streets. He is chronicling what needs to be

Chronicle. Shout out to Don Lemon for going to Minneapolis because a lot of people aren't going to Minneapolis for some reason right now. And I don't know why. I don't know why Don Lemon, independent journalist, is the only person with enough gumption and enough journalistic integrity to actually ask people what's going on with these actions and what's going on with ICE in Minnesota. I'm very proud of Don Lemon. I think he's doing an amazing job and I'm so happy. And he's a mutual friend of all of ours. And every now and then he lets me say crazy stuff on his show. So I have hit it in the most platonic and friendly way. I love the caveat.

Yeah. That will be the headline. Oh, yeah. All right. Had it or hit it ice. Oh, I've had it with ice. I think that everyone should be able to make this statement. We have to abolish ICE because they aren't doing their fucking job.

They are terrorizing naturalized citizens. They are terrorizing. people regardless of immigration status. They are terrorizing Americans. They have an overblown budget. They are killing people. They are ripping families apart. They are holding children hostage as a way

to try to get to their parents. When their parents have, they are throwing elderly people out in the snow. They are attacking Native American. Could you imagine asking a Native American? When did they get here? My God, it would be funny if it would be It wasn't so sad. So fuck ice, always, I've had it. I've had it with ice, I mean, years ago. But fuck ice. I've had it. Yeah. Love it. All right. Last one. Had it or hit it, the United States of America. Oh, I, I love this country. James Baldwin was the person that said, I love this country. That's why I critique it. I love this country. But I have had it with the direction we're headed in. Yes. We have to do something.

better. That has to be a full game change. That's across the board. We y'all do such a good job of saying I am upset not only with what's going on, but with establishment politicians for allowing us to get this place. I'm so lucky. I got to vote for Zora Mondani. We get to see what someone can do when they actually have messaging and when they have help and when people vote for them and when they enact plans. Within the first two weeks, he made sure people in New York City could get child care. He's now attacking hotel junk fees, things that help everyday Americans. So I have had it with the direction we're heading in, but I am. I have to be.

I'm a sucker. I'm hopeful. I'm hopeful that this will be a dip and that we will get out of it. So I've had it currently, but in the future, hopefully I can hit it. I mean, I'm with you. I vacillate like, oh my God, I hate it here. But I'm like, I really love it. it here. Like there's a version of America that is ours. There's a version of America where

we say, it's not my business. Yeah. Your genitals are. It's not my business who you love. It's not my business who you make out with. This is a free country. There's a version of America where you see a bunch of little kids in a classroom getting along and they don't have to worry that when their classmates is going to be taken by a modern day brown shirt. They don't have to worry about that. There's an America that I still have hoped for. And that's, I mean, I have to hold on to that because if I fall on apathy, then I'm, I'm cooked. So I have to hold on to that. Jay Jordan, thank you so much. Thank you all. I've had it. It was so fun. Y'all were amazing. Thank you for having me. What an honor. Oh, and Peter says hello.

You know, I love Peter. Tell Peter I say hello back. I will. And let's go, I did go to dinner. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Recently. And I told my friends I went to dinner with a younger gay and the start time for the dinner was 8.30 p.m. And I thought I was about to die. So if we do a menagerie twat date or if we wait till pumps is up here to do a double date.

Yeah. The queers and the straits. We'll go eight. We'll go. 730 perhaps no we're bump it up 530 bump it up jay 5 30 up at the time we don't have blue play specials in manhattan but okay we're gonna start him when i've had it ladies walk in they'll be like oh all right by jay late lunch all right bye y'all thank y'all i love him i love him yeah he's great he's so hilarious it's so It's so good when we have these guests because we cover on our other podcast all this IHip News shit and it's just, you know, about these white nationalists and it feels their movement sometimes feels so much bigger than what it is because they control the airwaves and all the bots and all of that stuff. And it's a reminder when we do this podcast. I mean, there's a lot of cool shit in our country and a lot of cool people and a lot of funny voices and diversity. And I just I just a part of me really.

really loves this country. I hate MAGA. I hate Donald Trump. I hate the grifters. I cannot stand white evangelical Christians, but God, that's been a 50-year hatred of mine. So that's not new. But I love the diversity of this country. I do too. And I love he's from Mississippi. He's queer. He's a writer, you know, smart writing. It's just I love everything about him. I have to tell you something so funny. It occurred to me while we're watching that. Every time, I have known you now for like 25 years. And every time you say twat, I laugh like it's the first time I've heard it. Like I think it's so funny.

Every time you say that. And I'm like, what does that say about me? That it's like you love me. Well, I know that I love you. That's love. Every time you say it, that's not laughing. It's ridiculous. All right.

All right. You ignorant twat. Tell them good. Tell them when we're going to see them next. You twice. We'll see you next Tuesday and Thursday. Listen up, Patriots, Gaytriots, and Natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped.

It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever. you get your podcasts and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and reviews so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind, pumps.

Pumps, what does an eagle say? Caca! A little bit more enthusiasm. Caca! That's it. That's, that's... Ciccah! That's the patriotism that this country means right there.