I've Had It - Muffin-Top MAGA

Episode Date: July 22, 2025

What's your problem, virgin?!Order our new book, join our cult, and more by clicking here: https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast.Thank you to our sponsors:Bombas: Head over to https://Bombas.com and use code HADIT for 20% off your first purchase. ASPCA: To explore coverage, visit https://ASPCApetinsurance.com/HADIT.*The ASPCA® is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insuranceBranch Basics: Get 15% off Branch Basics with the code Hadit at https://branchbasics.com/Hadit #branchbasicspodOpenPhone: OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at https://OpenPhone.com/hadit.Pretty Litter: Right now save 20% on your FIRST order and get a free cat toy at https://PrettyLitter.com/hadit. Follow Us:I've Had It Podcast: @IvehaditpodcastJennifer Welch: @mizzwelchAngie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumpsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Love thrillers with a paranormal twist? The entire Oracle trilogy is available on Audible. Listen now on Audible. So are we supposed to start the podcast? Ready? One, two, three. Oh, that was impotent at best. Do I try again? Yeah. Ready? One, two, three. There she is. You know what happens? If I don't look, I do better. Okay. But sometimes I catch it in the computer and then I get nervous. All right. Patriots, gay triots, they triets, black triets, brown triets. Fuck off. Welcome to America's top DEI podcast, fighting for democracy, fighting for all of the patriots, gay triets and they triets, black triets and brown triets in the fuckery that is Trump's America, the idiocy, the breathtaking incompetence, the flea market, the riffraff, the knickknacks, the bad makeup,

all of it, the faux Christianity with their little crosses while they're lying, the tongue talking on the White House grounds. You seen that shit? It's fucking crazy. They do a little prayer outside the White House and everybody engages in a little mild tongue talking. I'm like, hello, these people need to go to a mental institution stat instead of the White House, which just segues right into my I've had it. Let's hear it. I am so tired and I have had it up to my eyeballs with the lying that goes on in this administration and people believe it.

Like Trump on his lie social says, the economy's never been better. And that's all that's the tweet. That's it. The economy's never been better. Really? The dollars down, the GDP shrinking, we've lost 10% in the- Inflation's up. Inflation's up, prices are higher, they're not lowering the interest rates. But because you said it, now people believe it. And I'm like, I don't know if it's the lack of discernment, occult mentality, flat ass dumb shits, but people just, oh, well, he said the economy's great, so it's great.

Who are you more angry with, the liar or the people that believe the lies? That's a great question. Here's what I would say. I am mad because I know that Trump is a projection artist. So I know the reason he gets on Live Social and says the economy's great is he just got back economic numbers that show he is in the fucking toilet and he's dragging America. Which makes you angrier, the liar or the people that believe the lies? I'm getting there. Okay. So he knows better and he's lying. And these people are so vulnerable, whether by lying. And these people are so vulnerable, whether by on purpose or just not very smart or whatever the reason. So I think I'm more mad at the liar because the liar knows the difference. The dumb person I might have a little empathy for.

See, I'm mad at the dumb people, are you? All day, every day, twice on a Sunday. There are idiots and liars and con artists and solitude everywhere. The ability, the onus falls on you to use critical thinking, to vet what you hear, to not believe your lying eyes and ears. And we have these brains that are made for critical thinking and they want to believe him because he hates who they hate. And that's why I hate them more than I hate him. I mean, that's, you can, I mean, I could certainly jump on that bandwagon for sure,

but I just, in a whole, like, not going to the news, not looking and have an agency and verifying facts, that's on the person. But just like Joe Blow, who, you know, six months ago they did a poll, they didn't know who never heard the name Elon Musk. Like that 4% of the United States that just doesn't know. I feel like he has a higher fiduciary duty as president of the United States. I would say that that 4% who's never heard of Elon Musk are not primed to believe a tweet just because he says it. These are people, this is what you call a low information voter that is apolitical, that doesn't really watch and traffic in the news cycle.

I'm talking about the people who traffic in the news cycle all the time and go every single day to take their marching orders from him. And they do a 180 degree turn about what they believe in at all times. They will outlive Trump. Trump is an old, senile piece of shit that's just running around slurring his speech, breathtakingly incompetent. It's the people who believe this stuff that I hold more accountable, because it is a movement that will outlive him.

No, I agree with that. In my mind, it's like the low information voter. So like, I agree with you on the people that know and traffic in it, but just the random person that doesn't know that somebody is just lying to their face. And so they just believe it because it's the president of the United States. I kind of tend to fault the liar more. I still think they're a dipshit. Oh, they're fucking dipshit. I just, I do. I just think in this modern time, and I just think again, there's always this, there's always this white supremacist impulse to give deference to people that are white.

And the people who believe the shit that Trump says are white people. And if a group of black people or a group of immigrants do something, what do the white people say when they get arrested and get abused by the cops? You should have known the law. That job is yours. And they are really harsh on them. But what comes to white people, they're always off the hook. There's always permission structures, forgiveness structures, excuse structures,

set up for them across the board. No other group of people on the planet have that style of system where people give them the benefit of the doubt. None. Black people don't get that. Gay people don't get that. Immigrants don't get that. It's always white people. No. Always. That's 100% true. Yeah. I mean, that's absolutely right. Okay. Switching off politics. Have you noticed, I've had it with the new elevators. Have you noticed that they reverse engineered elevators? So instead of pressing up or down and then you get inside the elevator and the doors close then you push the floor you want to go to. Now there's elevators where you push what floor you want to go to first. And it just fucks with me so much, right?

So you're in this lobby and say you've got to go to floor 19. So then you go over to the screen and you're looking, then you hit 19 and then it flashes really quick like car E1. But it flashes, I was like, did that say E1? And then I'm looking and then you have to get in and then it closes the door and then takes you right up. So I thought for a while, oh, this is so you don't have to stop at all the floors. Right.

That's what I would think. Well, I was recently in New York and I was when I'm one of those elevators up on the 19th floor and then I was hitting lobby to go down. And so, you know, again, we're picking the floor on the outside of the elevator, which is a real mindfuck for me, right? I'm like, for all of these years, I've done it one way and now we're doing the reverse of this. I don't know whose idea it was. I don't know who workshopped it. I don't know what the purpose of this is other than just to fuck with people for using elevators. But then it starts stopping on each floor all the way down and people

just kept getting in. So I was like, well, what's the point of all this shit? Why can't we put the numbers back in on the inside? Are we trying to prevent that one toddler kid that hits all the buttons? Is that what this is? I don't understand why we're redoing elevators. I don't either. And my thought is you have a higher likelihood

of somebody hitting all the buttons when there's nobody watching over their shoulder. Like going into a crowded elevator and pushing every button, although I have been on an elevator when somebody did that, but I would think when you're by yourself, if you're inclined to hit all the buttons, you would do it when you're standing at the screen with nobody behind you. I have one question about the elevator. There's no buttons inside, so my first worry is, is there no like closed door? Like if someone's coming,

do you have any way to shut somebody out and be an asshole? Okay. So look, every time I get in one of these elevators, I go because then I'm like, I get in and out of habit, I go to like push the floor. I'm like, oh yeah, it already knows. But I do think that it has like an emergency and then the phone thing. But I don't know if it has an open close situation. I actually don't think it does because I was at CNN, they have these and I was when I was gonna be on CNN and it goes super fast. Like I hit the floor and then it's like,

it tells you what elevator to go to. And then I was like, oh my gosh, which one is that? Cause it's this huge bank of elevators. And I raced down and it had already closed. And then I had to go back to the screen and pick it again and then get a different elevator. All right. Welcome to I've Had It. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. Kylie, Kiki the Magic Lesby and what's going on? Okay, I've got two reviews for you today. The first one is titled Friends and Politics and they write, I've had it with my friends

whom I've known for most of my life, siding with MAGA, despite saying that they are friends with gays and lesbians and support their rights. I've tried educating them and pleading with them, but they are so brainwashed. I'm at my wit's end and have chosen to cut them off entirely and it's heartbreaking.

I have no close friends anymore. I live in a very rural area, so it's hard to know who you can ally with. Luckily, my immediate family is predominantly liberal and they live nearby, but I've been struggling since cutting ties with longtime friends. I recently found your podcast and it's fantastic. I love it. Thank you for sharing your stories and views. It really gives me hope for a better future. That's really sweet. That is nice. You know, I'm more like this person. Like if I know that people have, can do that, I see such a deep flaw in them and I see them as racist

and I see them as homophobes and I see that as an affront to the humanity and autonomy and of my gay friends or my friends of color and I'm unable to continue the friendship. Pumps is much better at this. You always have been. I see it as such a deep moral flaw in people, not Republicanism, but MAGA. It's so off-putting to me that I just don't want to be around them. I don't know if my answer is right. Pumps can just, she can just roll with it. And I can't, I can't do that.

I see it as such a character defect. And so I feel like I'm betraying the communities that I love by, by going along with them. Yeah, I think like in my situation, I have no choice. My parents, like I would have to cut off my parents and we just agree to disagree. And that's the, you know, it's news, whether sports. You like in general, you've been much better at like being around, I think because of the school

that your kids went to, knowing that people said racist things, like that's just an ender for me. Like I don't speak to them anymore. And I don't know if it's because there was just such the sheer numbers. And oftentimes I think maybe it would be better if I was like pumps. If I could just go and sit down with these people and eat a meal with them. Maybe I'd be so wound up. I will say it gets harder with MAGA. Like in 16, it was a lot easier than it is in 2026. And that's why the circle has, you know. You're making cuts.

I've made a lot of cuts. Yeah. I agree. There's a big difference from 16 to 24, 25. I agree with you on that. Yeah, what I'm thinking- Because it's moral now. At this point, it's moral. It's not a political discussion anymore. Yeah, what I'm thinking now at this point, it's moral. It's not a political discussion

anymore. Yeah. I mean, I think it was back then, but I remember at the time you weren't super into politics. Right. And 16 you didn't. We were just talking about this. You weren't into it at all. Right. I didn't get into, I didn't even really pay attention until I thought Donald Trump was an alcoholic and that somebody need to take his phone at night. Right. And Jennifer very artfully explained to me, no, he's stone cold sober. Yeah. He says this shit. He's a famous teetotaler. Yeah. So I mean, to the, to the caller, I don't know what the right answer is on that, but I, I feel the same sense of, I feel like these people are betraying humanity and I feel like if you just go along with them and let them behave that way and say racist shit and homophobic

shit and judgmental shit, then you're a part of the problem. Your silence is violence. And I think as an ally and a supporter of human rights, civil rights, gay rights, whenever you see injustice, you have to speak up. And for the reason that this MAGA exists, it was all of these people that we know that traffic and Republican hate speech and Republican class warfare and the Fox News stuff, they do it with impunity because there's always this deference given to white people that are racist, that do value money over things. And that's why they're able to get away with it.

And I just feel a huge calling that these people have to be called out. Yeah. And micro level first. Yep. You have to be called out. Yeah. Microwevel first. Yep. You have to start. So to the writer, you know, this is hard for you, but it might make some of those people feel something. And just to tell you, I mean, here's the truth of this whole matter.

This Angie story, Pumps' story, I think is really important. When I first met her, she was a Christian Republican that did not give a shit about gay rights, black rights, healthcare, any of that stuff. None of it. And I started calling her out. Right. We started having conversations about it. I had always been very political.

I had always been kind of a political junkie, and our kids were the same age, and we were in the same season, and we had chemistry, and we really liked each other. But her politics and her elitism, it turned me off. And that's the perfect word. It was a turnoff. Elitism. And I would start to call her out. And I would call her out, and that's the perfect word. It was a turnoff. Elitism. And I would start to call her out and I would call her out and conversations would come up

and they would come up and then slowly but surely somebody who was the white woman that you detest right now. Hate. You were. I was. So your story, Angie, is a lot more compelling than mine because you were in the Death Star, right? You drank the Kool-Aid, you thought you were better than everybody, a little bit racist,

a little bit homophobe, valued money over people's wellbeing, and you found enlightenment. And that to me is the most helpful story to help people get through this magaship because you have a roadmap to say, you know, when people started calling me out, I didn't like the way that made me feel. Well, it makes you think about like, what? Why don't I? Why don't I think it's why? Why do I not care if other people have health care? Why? Why is it just about me? And believe me, it wasn't an overnight thing. It was so wrapped up in the religious part of everything. I mean, you have to unpack

all of that. You know, the gay rights, the black and brown rights, that was the easy part. It was the elitism that was the hard part. Like I am actually not better than everyone else. I've been taught this my whole life. As a Christian, I get more, I am more, I'm better. I get to stand in judgment of other people. And when you really examine that, it is offensive, it is appalling, it is gross. And that's why I think I have such a,

like just an innate reaction to that. That's why fucking white women make me so fucking mad. That's why I think your story is so helpful. Because I think that there's probably a lot of white women out there right now who were sold the same bill of goods that we all are. And if you're a Christian, a little white Christian girl, then you're sold this extra bill of goods that if you just pray right to Jesus, you'll be blessed and chosen and God will find the perfect husband for you and blah, blah, blah. And that not only was all of that a lie, but it also made you a real superficial person. The difference in you now,

A superficial person, the difference in you now, in the person I first met, you're always fun, charming, engaging, all that. All of that, the fun, light part of your personality, all the same. What I love so much more about you now is how much depth, compassion, and empathy you have. And what's so interesting about that is a lot of Christians think they have empathy. They're sold this lie that they are so compassionate and empathetic when the fact of the matter is they're not. And I remember like back in the day I'd ask you about health, can you go, as long as I have it, I don't care who has it and who doesn't. And I'd be

like, what the fuck, Angie, you're a Christian. What about Jesus?" And I started kind of planting these seeds in you. And then of course, you know, you find enlightenment and of course you went down, you know, had personal pain and struggles that every, you know, no adulthood is free from. But I just, I really think your story is so important and so helpful to a lot of women right now that might be like, something feels off about this. You know, like seeing the deportations and that not tug at people's heartstrings. So that's why I just think your story is so important because I think there's so many people in the United States, particularly white women that are mothers that see the inhumane treatment of these immigrants and it just tears them apart. Kylie and I were talking about this the other day because Kylie's mom has kind of gone, same like

you, and now she's just like the biggest ally for Kylie and totally anti-maga. And Kylie, share a little bit about your mom. Yes, I think she was raised really similar as you Angie, and I was raised the same way, especially in Oklahoma. It's the normal way to be raised. And at what, 50? She is a completely different person than I knew my whole life. I think she finally, obviously she ended up

having a gay daughter. And so yeah, it's been really cool to see her growth. Well, and I think part of how I was raised, and, Kylie, you can speak to it as well, you're not—other people's problems are not going to affect you. And so you don't have any tools. You don't have any mental or emotional tools. You don't have the words because those things just were never going to happen to you. And so when you're confronted with really,

really, really hard things that everybody's confronted with, nobody is immune to. Then you have to find the tools. And it's really almost impossible to find them within that framework. And the difference is people just don't talk about it. Here's what's crazy. What really bonded us, Pumps and me, so we had kids the same age, husbands were both lawyers, both had a good sense of humor, and we had great chemistry, and we liked to bullshit together, and we liked to smoke cigarettes together. We had just a heck of a time together.

But what really bonded us is when her marriage kind of was revealed to be a fraud, not by her part, but by the ex-husbands. There was nobody in your orbit that could speak truthfully about what was happening. You only had people surrounding you that spoke about it in religious terms. Well, we just have to pray for him and pray for you. And you clung on to me for dear life because I actually had like psychological reasoning and deductive skills. And that's what really bonded us so much during that time period because you didn't really have anybody in your life that hadn't been raised the exact same way you were. Right.

And that's what I fear about with a lot of these, like, let's say rural communities in Oklahoma, for example, let's just take that. You are taught that you just don't talk about it or you just excuse it because I did. I remember I have a friend that's a therapist and I kind of tiptoed up to the water with her thinking because she was, she's not somebody I think would be judgmental or anything, but just like, okay, I need to talk about this. And I was like, so here's what I found. Like, here's what my eyes saw. And then here's what he told me. And her response was, well, if that's what he told you, then that's what happened. And that's, you're laughing, but that is how people solve problems in these, you know, not just in these groups,

because the truth is so painful and it is so difficult. It is easier to believe the lie. So what I fear is like in rural Oklahoma, when you don't ever have access to anything but church, Fox News and other people that look like you and sounds like you. You have no appreciation for anything that's not homogenous. You are never confronted with the hardships of life because you sweep them under the rug and move on. So it's like you never really have an opportunity for enlightenment. This is why I think your story is so helpful right now.

I really do. I think, and I know you're still finding it some, but I think that your story about being in the epicenter of white supremacy, Christian, racist, homophobic, worship money world and the biggest cheerleader for it, with know, with enthusiasm to finding your way to critical thinking and enlightenment all on your own. And now being this champion for marginalized people and for human rights for everyone is kind of a roadmap for people. I really do. I think I want you to dig deeper and deeper into it because I think we should put you

on tour. The HBIC tour. I really do. Kylie and I talked about it yesterday after work. Kylie, don't you think her story is really compelling and could help a lot of women that are looking at this going, this is just, this is fucked up? I think a lot more of my moms would have someone to look to. She had to do it on her own. There was no one to listen to. So yeah, you could be that person. And me, like I come from, it's like, I'm so, I'm not a credible messenger to them. I was raised an atheist.

By atheist parents. By atheist parents, I'm not as likable as you from the job. I'm a little bit more, you know, a little bit more pointy and sharp, call people out too quickly. I'm dead serious, Pumps. I think that your story, the white women that you hate right now, I think that you having

been one of them, I think that story is really good. I think you should write a little essay or something, then we'll put you on tour. Yeah, I don't feel quite like I certainly don't have all the answers, but I'm trying. I just, I really think it's a really important story. Out of the three people on this podcast right right this very second, her mom and you both turned off by all of this question. I was told all this shit my whole life is this bullshit. And then have found empathy for other human beings. And so well, and a lot of friends that I have a lot of your friends, I think you've turned them. Well, and also they've seen what's happened and they're just like.

But I think seeing you be so outspoken pumps has given them a permission structure. And you told me recently that one of your sorority sisters, somebody said something homophobic in front of her and she jumped on them. In a big group. And I love that so much. But I think you being so outspoken, it gives, it's like, oh, well, Angie's doing this, you know, to all five of their listeners. So I can certainly do it.

Six on a good day. Yeah, you know what I mean? I do, I just want to say, I really think, I really think you should talk about it more and more because I think it's a really helpful story. Well, maybe I will. To get us out of MAGA. Is that possible?

When I see young people in MAGA hats? I think it's a really cool story, and I think it's, I don't know, I just love it. And I love it that I didn't have to break up with you. Talk about a social media breakup. Well, do you remember when? I would have had to break up with you if you were still MAGA.

I would have had to just, well, to be fair, I left before MAGA. You did, you did. But I mean, you were, I mean, I remember when I told you I was a Democrat and an atheist, you were just appalled. The first person I ever knew that that existed. I didn't know that was real. Okay. Kylie found this story and it just is so share worthy. Okay. She'll love this. Japan now officially has more pets than children. Japan has 15.9 million pets and only 13.7 million children. Arigato gozaimashita. I want to move there immediately. Yeah. I mean, you know, the older I get, the more I appreciate the value of a dog. We don't deserve dogs.

We don't. Dogs are just, I mean, dogs are just everything. My dogs are, I don't know what I would do without my dogs. I mean, I talk to them all day. In the middle of my work day, I'll just glance at a little photograph of them. I do that too. When I get home and I go pick them up from their daycare and then we get home, I just, we have a lot to talk about. I have a lot of squeezing and squishing and running around and activities we need to do. They're just pure joy. They are. They're pure joy. I mean,

a crap in the house is the worst thing you're going to get from a dog. And that, you know, doesn't happen. Now I'm going back into puppyville. So I read all roads lead back to shit. Yeah. I mean, it's coming. Pumps and I need to share with everybody that we have written a book. It's called Life is a Lazy Susan of shit sandwiches. And believe it or not, Pumps and I have not always been so rock solid. And we talk about all of our trials, tribulations, most of all our fuck ups. Yes, because fuck ups are relatable

and a part of the human experience. I have gotten so much feedback regarding the book that because of my situation with the religion and addiction and all that, that people relate to that. So I do think there's something to take away that's comforting about it, because we've all been in very difficult situations. And listener, what we want you to do,

this is the It Book for summer reading. So please get your copy of Life is a Lazy Susan of Shit Sandwiches and take a picture of yourself with the book in really great places and tag at I've had it podcast and we will share your images with our summer it book you can buy it in bookstores you can buy it in the link in our bio you can buy it at Target Walmart Amazon etc all the retailers happy reading and happy summer Happy reading and happy summer.

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Here's one. There are more privately owned guns than people in the United States. The United States has an estimated 400 million firearms in a country of roughly 335 million people. This makes us the most heavily armed civilian population in the world by a large margin. This is insane.

Insane. What bothers me so much about this, I mean, there's a million things. But when I look at the rights that are being taken away from people, reproductive rights down to drag queens can't have drag shows in certain towns. Books. Books. And yet, if, okay, the Supreme Court just said, well, we're, you know, birthright citizenship, we're going to put some limits on it. But by God, those constitutional rights to guns, nobody's saying a word about that. And that is unbelievable. If nothing shows how much people value death, it's guns.

It's a death cult. It is a death cult. I mean, it's really like, when you look at it, it's just crazy because they were pro-life. And it's like, no, you're not. You're absolutely not. Like to think about the response, when I think about all of the shootings are horrific, but when I think about that Sandy Hook and these little kids, five and six years old, got into like a bathroom or closet.

So there was like 20 of them in one space. And the shooter with his assault rifle took out all of them with less than five seconds. We did nothing. Nothing. We did nothing about that. That is such a deep moral flaw in this country. And every MAGA Christian that says that you're pro-life, fuck you. No, you're not.

You are pro-death. All of your policies are pro-death. All of your policies are pro-death. MAGA, the whole movement and all of the policies are a direct attack on poor people. All of it is an attack on poverty and keeping people more impoverished and making them suffer more. There's nothing about MAGA Christians where they ever want to assuage or comfort those in suffering. It is abhorrent. I've totally had it. I've totally had it too.

And Sandy Hook was over 20 years ago. And we've still done... Think about all the people that have died since then. So many kids at school shootings. It's horrible. You know, I mean, if you're a mother in the UK or France or Australia, and your kid came to you and said, I want to be a foreign exchange student. I want to go to the United States of America. As a mother, you would say over my dead body, are you going to a country that cannot keep kids safe at

school because they value the gun lobby more than they do human beings? That's exactly right. And I wouldn't let my kid come here. No. All right, Kylie, do we have any callers today? We do. I'd like to hear from the callers. Up first, we've got Coleman. Hi, Jen. Hi, Pumps. It's me, Coleman, the gator from North Carolina that you met at the DNC. Yes.

My, I've had it is I've had it with these Christian nationalists that have a sticker on the back of their car that says Christian conservative Republican and then it says in that order at the bottom of it. Nobody gives a fuck. Nobody cares. Nobody cares to read your bumper stickers. Nobody cares that you have an American flag posted on the back of your car. We already know you live in America, bitch. Like, take it off. Take it off.

Actually, I just, you know what? I just hope my rear ends their ass at this point. I mean, you know, I can't stand these people. Oh, now they're giving a thumbs up out the window to a cyber truck. I cannot make this shit up. All right. I love y'all. I'm driving to work and I was listening to the pod and how to a cyber truck. I cannot make this shit up. All right. I love y'all. I'm driving to work and I was listening to the pod and how to turn it off so I could record this. I literally, I can't do this.

That's really funny. Like, we already know you're in America. Right. You're driving a car. It's like when people sign their text messages, like, yeah, I know I have your name programmed. You don't need to sign your text. We know you're in America. You don't need to put your flag up. See, I'm a bad person, probably. I mean, I feel guilty because the indoctrination in school, the Pledge of Allegiance, America's the Best,

all that, because I have like cringe city. When I see an American flag in somebody's yard, I immediately assume they're MAGA. I immediately assume they're part of a death cult. I immediately assume they're white supremacist, like homophobic, misogynistic. That triggers me like a cyber truck now. Here's the thing about patriotism, and it's the thing about like, it's like basically a mental health type thing. If you force people to love something, that's not healthy. You know, you lead by example. If we're supposed to be something, that's not healthy.

You lead by example. If we're supposed to be, if you want to feel pride about the United States, and there are times, like during the Olympics, and we have this great athlete, and the crowd shouts, USA, and you feel like, oh my God, I love this gymnast, or this ice skater, this is fantastic, our fabulous basketball team, they make me super proud. But there are other times where like, it's the people that were taking the American flag to beat up cops at January 6. And then this is the thing that I don't like. This

whole like dark MAGA coated shit that goes on where it's like the American flag and now it's black. Have you seen this? It's like black tone. With gold now. It's just too much. And these MAGA Christians in particular, everybody knows my ongoing problem with them, as well as Pump's ongoing problem with them. These people are really ruining everything. They are.

And they're nosy. They want to get up in your business. And I've never seen a group of people so obsessed with gay sex in my entire life. I think gay people don't even think about gay sex. They don't. As much as MAGA. They don't. And gay men think about gay sex all the time. But I'm going to tell you who trumps them.

MAGA men. And the amount of talking and thinking that they do about gay sex is just about the gayest thing I've ever seen in my life. 100%. But in terms of the bumper sticker, the only thing that's missing is guns at the end. Like, that's the only, like... Some of the bumper stickers say that, like, God, guns, and country. Right.

Yeah. I mean, there's a lot. I saw, in the airport, you see a lot of this MAGA coated merch and you see this like guns and God right now is I'm a big boy and I like wear a grenade logo and you know, and it's always cresting McCrester McCrester son with a muffin top that does that. I can assure you it's more than a muffin top and they're gyrators. And I'll tell you what else I can assure you. We've got little dick energy just oozing off of these people. You know what? I'm just going to go there.

And the potbellies make the penis seem even smaller. I guarantee you, I would bet you all of my kids' lives that 90% of these guys with their fat belly and their MAGA homoerotic shirts can't see their dick if they're not bending over. You know they can't. They can't. They cannot see them. They can't. But by God, they want to talk about it and how big it is. Repulse. Just the thought makes me repulse. Okay, next up, Kylie. Okay, next we've got Joey. I'll

tell you what I've had it with. I have had it with the protesters outside Planned Parenthood. Yes. I have had it with the protesters outside Planned Parenthood. Yes. Clearly, most of them have never touched a penis or a vagina. So where the hell do you get off, motherfucker? Tell me what I can and cannot do with my body. You stupid virgins. You don't have to worry about it. Nobody wants to fuck you, baby.

She called the Planned Parenthood protesters virgins. You know what? That is such a good insult too. What's your problem? Virgin. Virgin. Nobody wants to fuck you anyway. Why do you care?

You know, it's so fun. You know, when you think about, I, Kylie and I, we saw this sign where, and it reminded me of Kylie's girlfriend, Ana, cause Ana, when, when we're, you know, talking about like Trump or like when we played the Indiana Pacers when Oklahoma City beat them in the deal, she's always like, their uniforms are ugly and they're skanks. And so there was this meme, like real childish, and it's something satisfying about, you know, doing that. There was this meme and it had a picture of Donald Trump and it was like, he is the ugliest, skankiest twat on the planet. Just something

real immature. So I think that that's something we can do. Look at you, you skank virgin. Virgin skank? Yeah, like when, when Moses Mike starts talking about all the anti-gay stuff, what's your problem? Virgin. Right, yeah. Girating virgin. Your little gyrator version with your little muffin topping or micro peen. Your little handheld penis.

Thumb held penis. Your little pinky penis. No, it's really, you know, the amount of damage that's done to this country, and I think it's a combination of things. Like some people's parents weren't nice to them when they were growing up. So there was a feeling of inadequacy that then translated into the bedroom and inadequacy piled on. And they're so fucking mad about it that hurt people hurt people. So we have the

MAGA abuser party that just gets off on abusing everybody. And I'll just tell you what, I always think back to the Republican National Convention. Always. When Grindr crashed twice. And it takes a lot to crash Grindr. I would assume it's a pretty highly used deal or app or whatever you call it. And it crashed two times? Two times. Twice. Yeah. So yeah, there's just a lot. I think there's a lot of inadequacy. I think there's a lot

of small genitalia. I think there's a lot of self-loathing. A lot of virgins. And a lot of virgins. And I just think, I know everybody says I talk about all the time, but I think there's a direct correlation in how men, if they are secure, and if they are insecure, and if they know they're a shitty lay with a tiny penis, I think that spawns a lot of the hatred and the meanness and the cruelty. I mean, I just think you can just, you know, I see a cyber truck, I immediately know, small penis.

You see a big fat truck with extra big wheels. I know instantly you're small. And I think these men don't get it. They're advertising it. It oozes off. It does. They're compensatory measures that they take to hide the penis by enlarging other things around them is a huge reveal. All right, Kylie, who's next? Okay, up next we've got Anthony. Someone called you pussy pumps and juicy gents of the best. Hey, my name's Anthony, I live in West Hollywood, California.

I fucking love you guys, you're fucking gold. What I've had it with is I travel a lot for work and people are just always saying to me, have a safe flight. And I'm like, yeah, I fucking better have a safe flight. What the fuck else kind of flight am I gonna have? Right. I know it's well-int intentioned and I appreciate the concern and care expressed,

but it's, I find, makes me panic when there was none. But what I say now is I hope you have a comfortable flight or a cozy flight or a relaxing flight, but it's basically like, hey, don't die today in the metal tube. Right. Yeah. What about just have a good flight? Have a good flight. Hope nobody farts their way through your flight. Oh my God. Did you see that on social media? Yes. Where there's the guy in the videos and they're all on the plane and the lights are kind of dimming. He goes, whoever's farting on here, stop farting on the plane. Yeah, because you love potty humor.

I, 12 year old boy has nothing on me on that. And then I saw somebody made a meme of that and then panned the camera over to a Frenchy underneath an airplane seat. And I thought, boy, that's right. Oh, yeah. That is absolutely right. You know, here's the thing, flying nowadays, like I never in my entire life, in 54, 55 years, now 54 and 11 months, it really never, I never like- Wait, your birthday's in February. No, I know. But I'm saying like up until Trump took office and all this shit-

Are you 55? I'm 55. I was in 55 in February. Okay. I just in 55 in February. Okay. I just wanted to check again. Fuck you. My kids say, Mom, you look great for 60. I'm like, you fucking assholes.

But I never worried that my plane was going to crash. And now every time I'm worried about a flight, I'm like, this could crash. Like we have bozos who have fired all the people we need. I mean, Biden says at the end of his administration, we need to hire 2,500 more air traffic controllers. And what does fucking Elon Musk and Trump do? They fire 700 straight off the bat. I mean, it's kind of scary. And our flight kept getting delayed the other day.

And it was like every flight was delayed. And there was a big group of people. And Emily's like, why are they delaying all the flights? Of course, I'm like, because this is Trump's America. And nobody gives a fuck about the American people as long as the billionaires get to fly on time. They don't have enough air traffic controllers because Trump fired them all.

That's why we're all delayed. And she looked around. And then I sat down're all delayed. And she looked around and then I sat down in my seat and she texted me, she goes, I think that was aggressive. Okay. I have several questions. Did you say it that loud? Yes, I was mad. Yeah. Okay. And was there any observable feedback around? People were looking at me. There's no question. I should have turned around and been like, fuck everybody. Did anybody like come up to you and say? No one said a word. I think I was like, I was in Houston.

Okay, here's what I wish. Here's what I wish would have happened so desperately. I wish that somebody would have taken their phone out. Oh my God, I wish they would have. so desperately. I wish that somebody would have taken their phone out. Oh my God, I wish they would have! And then you would have been, because here's the deal, you would have been like a liberal savior while at the same time, like the lips of TikTok would be like white liberal woman unhinged in Houston International Airport.

And it would be, I mean, I could sit here and just do the podcast of people posting that. I think we could get the remainder of the year in because that would be gold. Nobody filmed it, nobody said anything to you? No, nobody. Any dirty looks? There were looks.

I would say more than just like, and that was the mean face versus just, oh God, she's talking loud. Kind of get, is she going to go full unhinged? I think that was what we were waiting for. But I didn't. I was just like, that's why. That's why we're all sitting here waiting and you look up and every single flight's delayed.

That's fucking why. I will just tell you, and we've talked about this before, ever since he got elected and they they gutted the air traffic controllers, more of my flights that I've been on have been delayed than on time. Yes. And in Biden's America, it was very rare and the delays were maybe an hour at most. I've spent in this calendar month alone, 20 hours in LaGuardia airport with delay, delay, delay, delay, delay, delay, delay. And then finally the flight get canceled

and I have to go back into Manhattan. But I asked the guy at one of the lounges, I was like, what is the deal with this? And he was like, we don't have enough air traffic controllers on the Eastern seaboard. It happens all the time. No shit. You know why? Fucking Trump. And Elon Musk wanted to cover up all of his Starlink bullshit. And now we're all the collateral damage. But don't worry, his fat ass can get on Air Force, getting ready to be Qatar, and Elon Musk can get on his Jackrabbit Learjet

to go put all his Petri dish babies to bed at night or whatever, nobody gives a fuck. I have another question for you. So sometimes when we're preparing for our other podcast, IHIP News, I get on Elon Musk's Twitter to see what he's up to. And he always posts these pictures of his rocket, his SpaceX rocket, and they clearly look like a penis.

I mean, just by nature, rockets are phallic. Right, agreed. But this one particular image that he had, it's like a camera shot going down and it's like this hard rock cock. I mean, I was just like, wow. I mean, that's just, a camera angle even made it even more phallic, because it kind of had like the head on it, the rock.

And then I remembered that story, and I didn't know if this was tabloid or truth, but don't you remember that story that we unearthed in the bowels of the internet about Elon Musk having a botched penile implant surgery? Here's the thing. I don't even have to know about the botched penile implant surgery. Here's the thing. I don't even have to know about the botched penile implant surgery to know Elon Musk has a penile problem.

I look at that cyber track, and I look at his behavior, and I think, this man has a very small penis. It's just, it comes right off the top. If you're running a business, you know that every time you miss a call, you're leaving money on the top. If you're running a business, you know that every time you miss a call, you're leaving money on the table. When every customer conversation matters, you need a phone system that keeps up and helps you stay connected 24-7. That's why you need OpenPhone. OpenPhone is the number one business phone system that streamlines and scales your

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they don't just feel good. Bombas actually does good and this makes me feel so good about purchasing their products. One purchase equals one donated item to someone who needs it and I think that's just really neat. Listener, head over to bombas.com and use the code HADDIT for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com code had it at checkout. Bombas dot com and be sure to use the code had it. You guys, when pumps tonight, we got to lunch together a lot during work days because we'll do our news podcast and then we got to lunch while Kylie and Seth edit it and then we come back and we film this podcast and commercials and a bunch of other stuff.

And so when we're out driving around and if a cyber truck is by us, I mean, it doesn't matter what we're talking about, what we're doing. Pumps is immediately enraged. She's like, oh my God, look at that fucking asshole in that cyber truck. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. And it's just like, I mean, you were so pissed off about Cybertrucks.

Oh, I'm so mad about Cybertrucks. Here's the deal, I'm even mad about Tesla. Yeah. And that started out to be good for the environment. Do you know what happened to me? One of those times that I spent like 10 hours in LaGuardia, and it's like my flight was supposed to leave at 1 p.m. At 9 p.m. they canceled it, so it was delayed 30 minutes,

then an hour, then two hours, blah, blah. When I left LaGuardia to go back and get a hotel room in Manhattan, I ping an Uber and guess what the car is? A Tesla. It was a fucking Tesla. And I just got in that Tesla. And here's the thing about Teslas that I want to say. They are like driving around in like literally a little mini Coke can. Yeah. The doors aren't heavy, the seats are not comfortable, they're not that great of cars.

Like I don't even know what the whole hype is over them. No, I don't either. And it was funny because when we were in New York last week, we were getting in the Uber and I thought, what are we going to do if it's a Tesla? Because we've gotten in a thousand before the Trump administration because we were on 200 flights in a year. Maybe one was late, maybe two.

Teslas all the time, especially on the West Coast. And so I just thought, would I get in the Tesla? Yeah, I mean, I did. But you'd been in the airport for like eight hours. So that, I mean, like at that point you're worn down. Like you are beaten down. But even on that trip, I, I'd Ubered a lot of times and I rode in a lot of different Teslas and I, um, you know, I don't like it. It reminds me of Elon Musk. It makes me think about the botched penile surgery, which doesn't make for a pleasant thought while you're driving through Manhattan to think about this chubby

billionaire that rips everybody off, that ran around on stage high on ketamine with a chainsaw and somehow jacking off in all these Petri dishes, giving all these women pregnant and somehow that he's got some botched penis. And then I'm driving several blocks in Manhattan and I'm thinking, this isn't healthy. This isn't how I should feel. Okay, I have to share one more thing with you all before we close. So something is completely happening to pumps that is hilarious.

So she said to me the other day, she goes, I swear to God, everywhere I go, if it's a grocery store, at the gym, or at a restaurant, wherever we are, I think, oh my God, that guy looks like Don Jr. Yeah. There's Eric Trump. There's, and we're like in Oklahoma City. And so she said like this guy at the gym looks like Peter Navarro, who's the tariff guy for Trump.

I thought I saw JD Vance at a Thunder game. So Chris Kuntz, I mean, like all these political figures, I think I see them. I'm like, something is wrong with you. So Chris Kuntz is a good Democrat. No, he's a good Democrat. So we're driving through this parking lot the other day on our way to lunch, and she just looks at me like it's perfectly normal. And she goes, we're in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. She goes, see, see what I mean?

There's Don Jr. And then we just drove on and picked up our conversation. No, it's bad. It's really bad. And I just want to say for the record, and I, my guess is Jeff Bezos probably is not well endowed. All his rocket obsession, he's got the new wife with all the- probably is not well endowed. All his rocket obsession, he's got the new wife. Maybe not, but some of the billionaire stuff, I think that these people, they start feeling delusions of grandeur that they're so important because people just give people with billions of dollars so much deference and they are treated differently and more special. And then I think they get bored.

I think they're bored. I think they get bored and they feel like they need to do things. So it's like Elon Musk obsession with going to Mars and you know, Jeff Bezos, you know, sending Gail King and Katy Perry into space is stupid. I mean, who cares? You know, they just do this shit. And then at the end of the day, But they just do this shit. And then at the end of the day, I do think a conversation we need to have is about capitalism. And capitalism allows for a lot of poverty. Democratic socialism allows for wealth, but it doesn't allow for poverty. And I have moved further and further to the left because I think I bought into the democratic narrative that, you know, maybe being a democratic

socialist was too extreme. And that's just propaganda that it is because really it's not extreme. Caring for everybody in the community is collectivism, making sure people live with dignity and have a livable wage. The number one way to prevent crime is to defeat poverty. You know, the answer to a lot of the problems that we have is to cast a war on poverty and instead we, you know, we enable the rich to make the poor poor. And anyway, I just think that I am a total democratic socialist because I think that if in a democratic socialist country like France, Germany, basically all of, you know, Western Europe. You have people that can have wealth, but they pay their fair share in taxes. Everybody has healthcare. If you're super

wealthy and you want a private doctor, by all means, get one. But the poorest person in your community, if they get cancer, is not going to go bankrupt. And so, I don't know, I just, I think that the capitalism and having like so many billionaires with all this wealth is really kind of gross. It's so gross. And I had that same thought. I watched that. Are you a democratic socialist? Yeah. I'm all in. Because on Fox News, they keep playing like, this is what, say his name for me, because I was... Zoran Mamdani. I'm obsessed. You're obsessed. And so on Fox News, you're like, he wants healthcare for everybody. He wants rent control.

He wants people to be able to buy groceries. I mean, it's just like, oh, that sounds so fucking terrible. God, kids. I mean, like in Oklahoma, we turn away free lunches. We would rather kids starve. But my one thing I was just going to say, and I know we're trying to wrap up, but I watched that Titanic thing, the submersible, the summer rain deal. What I came away with is billionaires get fucking bored.

That's what I think. They're just bored to tears. That's what I think. I think they're bored to tears. And then there's this expectation on them. What are they going to do next? What's the next one? And here's the thing.

It's not that they're a lot smarter than everybody else. It's not that these people, their IQ is 10, 20 points higher. They're probably just better deal makers at the right place at the right time. Now somebody like Bill Gates that created that kind of software that revolutionized the way people conduct office through Microsoft, you know, there's obviously a lot of intelligence. Steve Jobs. There's Steve Jobs, yes. But I think that sometimes, you know, Jeff Bezos, it's a really smart business, but it's a hustle business.

Right. And he hustled and made that work. And I give him credit for that. Totally. I do too, but I don't know that Jeff Bezos needs to have $400 billion. Four hundred billion, four hundred billion dollars. I think it's obscene. Here's the thing. I would have zero issue with Jeff Bezos having $400 billion if he and Amazon and his related

companies paid their fair share of taxes. Agreed. They paid their percentage of the infrastructure that they use. And if they paid their fair share of taxes. Agreed. They paid their percentage of the infrastructure that they use. And if they paid their workers, if their workers could have the benefits that he enjoys, and I'm not saying they have to have yachts and do bubble baths with their girlfriend or whatever.

I'm just saying if they could have a livable wage where they had dependable health insurance, they had child care options, family medical leave, all the things. I wouldn't give a fuck if he had a hundred billion, quadrillion dollars. You know what, we would be such better billionaires. I would be a fantastic billionaire. I would.

I owned Amazon or Tesla or Microsoft or whatever. I would want my obituary and the Wikipedia page about my company to say, not only did Jennifer accomplish all of these things, she was a pioneer in making sure that her employees received the exact same healthcare that she did. And they received liberal wages, holiday bonuses, four-day work week. Really, I would want to be revolutionary in the ways that helped human beings, not with the rocket shit.

I would want to do something that really left a generational impact on society. Bouncing a pop star up to space for 10 seconds doesn't do a thing. We've already been to the moon before I was born. That's just kind of like old news. But he could actually leave an imprint that left generational wealth and happiness and serenity and they don't do it. And it's just gross. All right. Listen, we've got to cut. Okay. All right, guys, listen, that's all we have today. We could go on and on. We'll continue

this conversation later. If anybody knows Zoran Mamdani, please have him contact us. I need him on the podcast ASAP. I've already reached out to our booker to reach out to him. So we might already have it done by the time this airs. You could direct message your friend Alex. Ocasio-Cortez. I'd love to give you my BFF Alex. When next time she's on, I'm just going to say friend Alex. Ocasio-Cortez. I'd love to give you my BFF Alex. When next time she's on, I'm just going to say Miss Alex. All right.

All right. Tell him. We will see you next Tuesday and Thursday. Always get. I hate you so much. I'll tell you what I've had it with. Let's hear it. I've had it with that.

Listen up, patriots, gaitriots, and matriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America, always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever. You can get your podcasts and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind. Pumps, pumps, what does an eagle say? Cacaca. A little bit more enthusiasm, caca. That's it, that's, that's, caca.

That's the patriotism that this country needs right there.