I've Had It - Queer Eye for All Y'all with Bobby Berk

Episode Date: May 23, 2023

Jennifer and Pumps are feeling like hot sh*t because our guest this week is a *really* big deal. Design expert and Emmy-nominated host of Netflix's Queer Eye, Bobby Berk, joins the girls. The three discuss everything from getting the cops called on you in a road rage incident to what it was like growing up gay in a highly religious environment. Pre-order Bobbys upcoming book 'Right at Home: How Good Design is Good for the Mind' at bobbyberk.com/book  Thank you to our sponsors: Lume: Control body odor, ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and $5 off of your Starter Pack (that's over 40% off) with promo code HADIT at lumedeodorant.com/hadit #lumepod HoneyLove: Get 20% off @honeylove with promo code HADIT at https://honeylove.com/hadit #honeylovepod CareOf: For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter code hadit50 Athletic Greens:  Go to athleticgreens.com/HADIT for a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Hint Water: Visit hintwater.com to get $1 a bottle with free shipping, when you order 3 cases. That's 36 bottles for $36 plus free shipping. Just use code HADIT at checkout. Subscribe to our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/IveHadItPodcast Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps Special Guest: Bobby Berk: @bobby

Okay, what's the number one reason you should try Instacart? Shopping over 1.5 million unique products from over 1000 retailers and get everything delivered right to your door in as fast as one hour. All in one app. So you can spend more time with the ones who matter most. Visit Instacart.com to get free delivery on your first three orders. Offer valid for a limited time, $10 minimum per order, additional term supply. So are we supposed to start the podcast? One, two, three.

I feel like that was a lot of good going into it, but I went super loud. You know what prevents you from being a great clapper? My boobs. Yeah. That was better. That was better Better What's going on? How are you today? I'm great

excellent Really happy. I'm happy to be here with you to spend time with you. That's so nice Even though you're so mean to me that is such bullshit Okay, I just have to say that we've gotten some comments that people are going back to the headband episode. Yeah, because it was horrific. Yes. And one comment, Jennifer, is not her friend. Can you let me keep that whole here's the thing? Like sometimes I think something so shocking happens to people like when I saw that you arrived to a room that you knew there were going to be three cameras on you and you had

that headband on with hair hanging out of it. I was so shocked and it was breathtaking and alarming and jarring and I just thought wow I mean I know she doesn't give a shit but this is kind of next level. So I thought if she doesn't give a shit, why should I give a shit? Yeah, that's probably true. Because most of the time I tell you something like, hey, you have a camel toe, you look at me and you say, I don't care. So you've conditioned to me, right, that you don't care.

Even if your jeans are right up, defining a camel toe that you don't care. Even if your, you know, jeans are right up, defining a camel toe that is recognizable from the top of the Empire State Building. You've looked at me and like, I don't care quit looking at my twat. So I just assumed that me suggesting the headband looked like hammer dog shit that you would say I don't give a shit. Let's record so I just the daffy lips. You do Haiti Yakmouth So I didn't yeah, that would have been criticism that I would have well, but now you're a victim I'm big me when you're the offender but whatever all right, right? What's going on? What have you had it with what's going on besides you picking on me and lying and saying I mean to you. I called you last night just to tell you how much I loved you.

You did and that was so sweet and I love you, you. Okay. All right. Okay. So what I've had it with is people disciplining other people's children. For example, I was reading an article in the British mirror where this 60 stop were just real quick. The last few times you've mentioned articles, it's like UK tabloid press. Since your ass went viral there, is this where you frequently read? Yes, I've gone completely British news because of the famousness of my ass. Okay. All right.

Right. Seed. Perseed. Well, you know, I watch BBC two. I do too. Okay. Go on. We love you.

You okay. Okay. Go on. So, um, they, this woman was at a pub with her family. They'd been at the beach all day and her kids were giggling, recounting some stories. And the 65 year old man turned around and told her little child to shut up. I mean, I was jaw dropped by that. I mean, that is horrible.

I just have had it with, I mean, I get, like we don't like playing peekaboo with kids and you know, kids are obnoxious and all that but we never like or mean to kids. Right. I don't know. I might have just really bowed up. Well, I'll tell you a time that an adult kind of trolled my kids. So we went to an Oklahoma City Thunder versus LA Lakers game

at the Staples Center in LA. Okay. We're sitting court side right behind the thunder and we're so excited to be there. My kids are like full blown NBA obsessed. Right. Thunder's crushing LA. So this was a while ago.

Yeah. So we're cheering and having a great time. My oldest son Dylan in particular is like a walking Wikipedia of NBA stats. So he's like in a hog heaven. So he's cheering jumping up and down. And this asshole like three seats over to Dylan who at the time is like 14 or 15 years old. And Dylan's like going, yeah, let's go, you know, way to go Russ.

Come on, Dunder. I mean, just basic chance that you would hear at a sporting event. This guy like loses his shit and he goes, oh yeah, Oklahoma City, fuck you. Fuck that. Do you see all those flags up there? How many rings you got? How many championships you got?

And he's like going off on Dylan and Dylan kind of like, I'm sitting down, I'm cheering, but I'm not as into it as Dylan. Right. Dylan's like kind of drops his jaw and he looks over at me. And I'm like, hey, bro, you're saying this to a 15-year-old. Do you feel like a fucking tough guy now? And so then he kind of calms down and then I just immediately eviline the rest of the game.

Oh, for sure. I'm just sitting there with my arms crossed, just like, come on. Like, you messed with my cub. Right. Put it at a basketball game cheering for his team. Which is what you're supposed to do as a fan. And this guy is acting like such a dick. It's unbelievable.

And let me just say that this guy for sure has never played a game at basketball in his life. Oh, for sure. They're a game of basketball in his life. Oh, for sure. They're the worst ones. I feel like resting heart rate, one thirty, one forty possibly. And he's all wound up at a teenager. It was a big deal for us. Like we went to the Staples Center, we followed the team like we were so excited.

And this guy, you know, is just such a dick. So I've experienced that before. However, I will say I've wanted to tell a lot of kids to shut up in person. I've wanted to tell a thousand kids to shut up in person, but I don't do it because they're kids. Right. And typically, especially with a smaller child, like the situation with Dylan, it sounds like he was a but butt hurt loser, period full stop because you're a sporting event, you're supposed to be loud.

But I think somebody that just goes bananas on a kid, the problem is not with the kid. If the kid's acting up, it's the parent's problem and they're not taking care of it. But in a situation where your kid's just being a normal kid, I just think that's horrible. Yeah, most of the time I'm anti-kids, like in the instance where playgrounds are being taken over

by pickleball players. Right. I'm pro pickleball players. Kids being assholes on airplanes, I'm pro whatever we have to do to shut them up. In this instance, I'm gonna be pro kids. But you would not even on a plane if a kid kicked you back the whole time. You would not say one word. You might get, no, I have.

But you wouldn't be ugly. You wouldn't say shut up. But I have had kids kicking me and I turn around and I say, hi, do you mind not kicking the back of my seat? I'm trying to take a nap. Right. Which I think that's entirely appropriate. Right, but I'm just saying, like you would never say, shut up, even to your own kids. I've probably told my kids to shut up before. I mean, I know that you have, because I've heard your kids, I've heard you tell your kids, shut up and quit acting like dicks.

I've actually heard that coming from your mouth. But it's more like, I always like, I'll tell them, you're acting so weird, stop. Oh no, I've heard shut up. You guys are dicks, I've heard. No, no, no, no, I for sure do that, but it's not like, I mean, maybe it is like, like, lesson listener.

We're not like these sanctimonious, like of course, as a parent and when you're around kids, you lose your temper sometimes. Right. And it's like, oh my god, you're driving me crazy. Shut up. That happens. That's normal. Yeah.

It's just this this concept that kids have to be around pleasantry all the time is total bullshit. It's total bullshit. You haven't lived by it. I haven't lived by it. It's an impossible. It's impossible bar to parent by. I mean, it's absolutely impossible. Right. But if somebody if I was at a bar and somebody told my kid to shut up, add mouth off. I mean, there's just no doubt. No doubt. I'd probably end up in a fist fight. I'd like to see that. I don't think I'd be very good in a fist fight.

I think I'm a lot of big talk. Yeah. But I think if somebody hit me, I would just be like crying in the corner. So Janine, what have you had it with? I have had it with the absolutely psychotic, hypocritical, schizophrenic, driving patterns of myself.

I'm pretty bad about it too. Let me give you an example. Okay. I was on my way here to record this podcast. I'm running a little late. I'm behind. I'm working at my other job and trying to drive to this job. Just for the permanent record, I want to say that I was here on time and you were late. Just so everybody was like, right now Jennifer Waltz designs pays everybody's payroll. So Jennifer Waltz designs. That's right. It was a payday today and we had to be there. So anyway, I am driving here and

there's a person that's making a left turn at an unprotected green light. So it's not a green arrow. It's just the green light. So they're on keving traffic can come and they have to turn when there's an opening. Right. I Immediately feel like the person that's making this left turn because I'm going straight is doing it on purpose to make me late and to piss me off. Right. I feel like, God damn it, you just have to take a fucking left turn and I'm in a huge hurry and I think that they have literally this person that doesn't. Right. That doesn't know that I'm behind them. Correct.

Is intentionally taking this left turn that takes a long time to take just to dickmate it's over. Personal. What about that? Personal attack. What about that level of narcissism when it comes to driving? Another example is like I can,

somebody can be on their phone at a stoplight and I just simply don't use my phone when I'm in the car. I think it's selfish. I think with, you know, all the accidents that can happen, I'm just like, I'm not using my phone in the car. So somebody's on their phone at a red light, light turns green, three seconds pass, and so I'm laying on the horn. And then they're like, you know, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm like, yeah, you know, get off your phone, I'm saying this on're like, you know, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. And I'm like, yeah, you know, get up your phone. I'm saying this on my head, you know, like, fucking schmuck. I mean, come on, let's go.

If I'm the person that's in front of them, and I'm like daydreaming, listening to a song looking out and they have to honk at me, that complete opposite reaction. I'm like, hey, calm down. Cool, you're jets. It's not that big of a deal. It was just two to three seconds.

I am a fucking psychopathic schizophrenic, hypocritical driver. Everything that I get irritated at, I do. Yeah, everything I do, I get irritated at when other people do it. So I've had it with the schizophrenic impulse psychotic-ness of myself when driving automobiles. No, I think that is relatable. This morning I was going downtown to the courthouse and

Exact same thing happened the person in front of me was on their text. The lights were turning green, right? And they were sitting there. I blew my horn three times in four blocks. Yeah. So, I mean, and then the next thing I know, I'm sliding into the other lane because I'm looking at something on my phone, which I'm super guilty of. I know you're not guilty of it, but I personally, and the worst about using my phone, like if I'm sitting at a stop sign, I do it all the time where somebody has to honk at me, but it makes me crazy. Like I want to give them the double birds,

tell them to go fuck themselves. I don't feel like it's personal as much as I feel like you're just a horrible human being. I somehow personalize this shit, which is clearly narcissism, but here's another example. Like if there's a school zone and you have to slow down to 20, right? If the person in front of me slows down to 19 to 20 in my mind, I'm like, oh, look at the show off. Look at the rule faller. What a fucking dork. What a loser. Go at 19 to 20 in a

school zone. You just don't want to hit a kid. Right. So then if I'm not in a hurry and I'm listening to a great song and then the school lights are on and I decide to be a role follower, I think boy, I'm just an upstanding citizen and I'm crushing this fucking school zone. I'm a fucking psycho. Yeah. I think driving brings out like really bad in all of us, especially the school's end. Because if I'm in a hurry, I'm just like you. I am like topping it out about 30 furious at the person in front of me.

But if I'm not in a hurry, if I'm like running early to something, then I'm the slowest person. And I think, oh, I bet the people behind me are in a hurry and hate my guts. But I never think about other people's feelings when I'm the slowest person and I think, oh, I bet the people behind me are in a hurry and hate my cats. I never think about other people's feelings when I'm driving. That's what I'm saying. Like, I am a narcissism in that.

Yeah, no, I do. Now, let me just say, like, if I'm on the highway, I am not going to grandstand in the fast lane. I only use that for passing. Right. I'm not going to be one of these people that does, you know, the speed limit in the fast lane. Now, talking about a fucking dork, who goes the speed limit in

the fast lane on the fucking highway, dorks and losers. Right. No one on the planet had it. Except I always think the person's got to be like old, like grandma. No, I pass these people in the slow lane, and I look and it's all types of people. It is what I love to blame shit on older people. This is not the case, because I've seen, you know, 80-year-olds pass me. So this is not the case. There are offenders, stupidity across the age gap on this.

This is not an old person problem. And here's what I don't understand about people that pass in the slow lane, you're in the fast lane. You're passed in the slow lane. Is that not a moment of self-awareness? Apparently not. Apparently not. Like I would think, oh my God, I should probably get over.

People are passing me from the slow lane. But no, they just keep on keeping on. Well, I would like to welcome everybody to, I've had it podcast. This is a podcast where we are getting to the deep dark bottom of all the shit that's wrong with people. While also understanding that we are offenders, complete hypocrites on basically every episode, every issue that we bring out more than likely we do. But that's neither here nor there. Let us stay on top. This is not a psychological case study on the hosts.

Right. This podcast. This is just a psychological case study on the fuckery in the general public. Whether we are participants or not, that's neither can you norther her? Right, okay. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. We call her pumps and I'm just gonna say I do stand by that she is the star of the show. Even though there's lots of comments for you to be the star. I know, but you know how humble I am. I saw every single one of those comments on Apple, on YouTube, on TikTok, on Twitter, and Instagram. I saw them all. Do you screenshot them?

I'm not here to take a victory lap. I am here to say you are the star of our show and I would also like to bring to the listeners attention that Kylie is here with us, Richard is here with us, Kylie speaking of comments on social media. What's going on? You run, you run, I've had it. You're the one who made us go viral. What's going on? What, what is the beat on the ground? The beat that I want to focus on today is pumps and her lesbian arc. Oh yeah, okay, let I love it.

Oh my God, inject that tweet into my bank. Retweet, retweet. I'm going the second we finish recording this. I'm going on Twitter and I'm going to retweet it. For sure. That is good stuff. That is a great tweet. Kylie great find.

And yes, Jennifer and her lesbian friend are fire and hot shit. Okay, on your TikTok video about your lesbian wet dream. Oh gosh, okay. Tammy McNeil comments, if I wasn't happily engaged, I'd for sure take pumps out and break her lesbian dating cherry. Oh!

I like that! That is so kind. Tammy, she likes that. Listen up, listener, I'm constantly trying to stay hydrated and unlike the star of our show pumps, I like to drink water instead of sweet iced tea. But water can become boring and monotonous and lacks flavor.

Fortunately for me, I have discovered hint water. It is a pure water with fruit essences to create surprisingly accurate fruit flavors without any sugar, sweeteners, or calories. There are so many benefits to staying hydrated or skin, looks and feels better. You have more energy and those pickleball shots really bang people. Let me tell you, hint is pure fruit infused water. My favorite flavor is watermelon. Hint is available at retail and club stores across the U.S. And listen up listener, this is special for you all. You can find

hint water at retail stores like Walmart, Target and Croger, or have it delivered directly to your front door from hintwater.com. New customers that you listener can get hint for just one dollar a bottle with free shipping. When you order three cases. That's 36 bottles for $36 and free shipping. Just use code, had it and you will be so hydrated like me and not like pumps. You know, pumps, I think I want to try to smell better naked. And let's face it, our underarms aren't the only places that we have odor. That's why I'm so excited to tell you about loomie whole body deodorant for pits,

privates, and beyond. As you know, I play a ton of pickleball, so I'm sweating constantly because I'm such an elite athlete. Loomie was created by an OBGYN who discovered and proved in clinical testing that the vagina is not to blame for day-to-day odor below the belt. So she developed Lumi, a uniquely formulated pH-balanced deodorant.

It's aluminum-free, and for our UK listeners, that's aluminium-free. Skin safe and clinically proven to control odor up to 72 hours. Listener today is your day because you can choose from three cents, clean tangerine, lavender sage, or toasted coconut. Loomy starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant, cream tube deodorant, two free products of your choice, like a mini body wash, and deodorant wipes and free shipping. As a special offer for our listeners, new customers get $5 off a Loomy starter pack.

Use code HADIT at loomeedeodorant.com. That's l-u-m-e deodorant.com. That equates to over 40% off your starter pack. When you visit loomeedeodorant.com and don't forget to use code, had it. Well, pumps, we have a really big day today. I mean, it's an exciting day and I've had it. So here's the deal. We're hot shit because we have international listeners.

And then sometimes we have guests that confirm right, our hot shitness, right. And today's guest is nothing further than confirmation as to what a big fucking deal. And how hot shit we are because he is definitely hot shit. He's hot shit. He's coming on our podcast, our podcast is hot shit. Your hot shit. I'm hot shit. Kylie's hot shit. Richard's hot shit, he's coming on our podcast, our podcast is hot shit, your hot shit, I'm hot shit, Kylie's hot shit, Richard's hot shit, it's hot shit city. I've had it podcast period.com and a story.

Right. Without further ado, let me introduce the design expert and Emmy nominated host of Netflix, Queer Eye. Let's welcome Bobby Burke to I've Had it. Yay! Okay, Bobby, welcome to I've Had it. How are you? Good, how are y'all? We are great.

I love the y'all. It's my Texas roots coming out. Yeah, we're big. You're gonna get a couple drinks in me or on the phone with my mom on y'all, really hear it. yeah, we we're in Oklahoma City right now and that's where we live and so we are big offenders of the word y'all. I'm a big y'all. Well, I grew up in Texas and Missouri so like right on each side of y'all. So I. Well, Bobby, you know, I don't know if you know much about us, but this is a podcast where we are exposing everyday frustrations and everyday fuckery that happens with the general

public and the name of this as you know is I've had it. And so we just write out right out of the gates. We want to hear what you've had it with. I mean, my biggest thing that I've had it with is people that are just unaware. You know, the people in the grocery store that when they go off to look for something, just leave their card in the middle of the aisle and the narrowest part they possibly can, just saying, ah, it's fine. Everyone can go to another aisle. Or, you know, the people who are turning left on the road,

and there's a left turn lane, yet they've got their cars ass in the middle lane still too, being like, I can take up two lanes. So just people that are super, super unaware of everybody else around them, or maybe they are aware and they just don't give a fuck since you're so fucker earlier. I'll go ahead and do that on the fuckery too. Yeah. No, this is, this is something that is, I mean, a part of our mission

statement here at I've had a podcast to expose and we call it breath taking unawareness. It kind of takes your breath away when you see it. Like what about the person in the grocery store, their carts in the middle, and then they're bending over to get something, and there's four inches of ash showing. That you didn't want to see. Honestly, it depends on the ash, that's what you say. The Japan.

The Japan, they are aware, and they're very aware. Right. I always think you've got to feel the air on your crack. Well, I would think that, but when I spot you having camel toe and I say you have camel toe, there's no air in the camel toe. Right, but there's a same going up your vagina. That is a country song right there. They've got to feel the air on their crack.

That's right. You got to feel the air on the crack. Oh, and like their mama's whack. Oh my gosh feel the air on the crack. Oh, and like, their mama's whack. Oh my gosh, you're a good singer. Yeah, all these talents. That is impressive. Yeah, I think for me, I'm just like, I'm such a hyper-aware person, like too much so. I actually wish I wasn't because I sometimes drive myself to the point of insanity by being super hyperware.

Like, I remember years ago when my husband and I would live in, lived in New York, like I'm a very fast walker. And we would just be strolling along on our day off. And I would still be, you know, on an LA run, a New York walk. And my husband would be like, I don't, why are you walking so fast? I, we don't have anywhere to be.

And I'm like, well, you know what, there so fast? We don't have anywhere to be. And I'm like, well, you know what, there are 18 million people behind me that do have somewhere. Right. I will not be the person that makes them miss their trade. Right. Love that. No, I have, I'm with you. I have and I'm an interior designer as well. And so maybe it's just like our attention to detail in everything. I'm so overtly aware of what I'm doing and if it could impede on somebody else's space or and then if I happen to be a violator I'm immediately like oh my god I'm so sorry like overly overly apologizing to the person for the violation. Totally I go full whole

Canada. So speaking of like unaware, there's a really funny story that so about a year and a half ago, my oldest son, he was moving to Syracuse to be a freshman at Syracuse University. So I call Pops and this is the greatest thing about Pops. Like she's a friend that you can call and say, hey, I'm moving Dylan to Syracuse, do you want to come and help? And she's like, oh my god, absolutely, I would absolutely love to do it. And when she says she would love to help, she means it. And then when you get her there,

she's an incredible helper. She'll box, she'll clean with a smile. And she's like, oh my God, Dylan, I'm so excited to see you. She's a former sorority girl. So it's like, oh my God, this is so great. This is amazing. Nenenenenen. So we're moving, oh my god, this is so great. This is amazing. So we're moving into the dorm and we go downstairs to the mail room because I'd ship some stuff from Amazon to arrive So we go downstairs and there's this little like probably junior at Syracuse little whipper snapper

I can't live you're telling and I said hey, I need to pick up something for Dylan Welch's room 649 And she like looked at pumps in me. And she goes, are you guys students? And we're like, no. Obviously. But thank you. So then she's like, well, only the student can pick up the package.

And I'm like, OK, so we turn around. So pumps has gone from, I'm here to help. Rob Ross is being bought. Let's go Dylan. And then all of a sudden she activates pump savage mode. And she goes, maybe if that girl would quit being a cut and get some awareness, she'd realize that we weren't in fact students. And I'm like falling over on the campus of Syracuse, crying laughing because she's just like completely giving me whiplash from like, she's excited and you know, invigorated. And Rau-Rau, let's go orange Syracuse to call and college students' kids just casually. And I think we're going to be fast friends.

I'm excited too. Because that is, that isn't where I use a lot in my car in LA. Yes, I bet. My friend of mine was visiting the other day in the car with me for quite some time. She was like, you know what? I just didn't realize there were so many stupid cons. You ask the stupid. I have my 18 month old, my youngest child. He was 18 months.

We were going into the doctor's office. And I stopped to let people go and he goes, go, stupid, go. And I was like, oh, gosh, she's heard me say that. Calling everybody stupid. I mean, he was just so happy to call him stupid. Barely kept talking, but able to say stupid. Yeah. I just, the idiots on the road.

Again, this is people that they think they're the only person on the road and that nobody else has anywhere to be but them the other day. I was on the way to a doctor's appointment and there was a car broken down on the right lane. So I was trying to get over in the left lane and also to get out of the way of people who were trying to turn right at the street before. And there was this woman with a full car length in front of her

making it impossible for me to scoot over in the left lane. So I did the polite look like, beep beep beep, like, hey, you have a full car length in your head. So I beep beep, and I just kind of went like, you know, hi, can you move up a little bit? And she's like, does one of these numbers

in her career be mirror? And so I was like, and she'd say, you know, the devil in her mirror. And I was like, fuck you bitch. You know, I'm like, and so she was like, and she gets out of her car.

And so of course I instantly pick up my phone and I start recording her and she's like, I'm calling the police. I'm calling the police for what? Because I walked to you and called you a stupid bitch. What? She's like, I'm calling the police. You're in your violence.

I'm a police. I was like the police, you're in your violence. I'm a problem. You're just like, please, please do call the police. And I made sure I was loud and she's on the phone with 911. I can hear her talking with them. I was like, call the police. So that way when they get here, they can see that you are

finally a false fucking 911 cause somebody honked at you when you're feeling. I'm like, are you for real? And the person on the other line clearly was like, man, what's going on? And she was like, no, no, no, he's been violent. Teach me to be violent. You can just forget me.

This is what makes a bitch right there. You're like, hard enough out of the way to just go to my appointment. But she made me late. This is what we call a titty baby. I mean, this is a titty baby. She was not paying attention to how much space she had. She's spatially unaware, which is unacceptable.

You reminder, you know, let's nudge forward. And then all of a sudden, she's a victim. And then just the histrionics, right? I'm telling the police. So back to the word, can't really quick. I just want to revisit this because in London. I think that went up from tan, the British cunt. Yeah, that's what I was bringing up is in the UK,

they use cunt in a way that pumps an eye and maybe you can join us in this. We want to make it more mainstream in the United States. So my husband and I were in Hyde Park and he has a breathtaking level of lack of self-awareness. It drives me fucking crazy. Same with my husband.

So we're walking and the part of the sidewalk is for pedestrians. The other part is for bicyclers and the British are fucking psychos about their bikes, right? So Josh kind of steps over into the bike lane. Right as the cyclist is coming by and the cyclist immediately calls Josh a fucking cat. And I was like, I love this city. I love this country. What a move here. Long live the king. Long live the queen. What do I need to do? I mean, I immediately was like, I fucking love

these people. I'm not didn't think like, Oh, I've got to defend Josh. I was like, he is a cat. I appreciate that. It was a totally unaware move on his part. I loved it. Tan, I remember the very first day of auditions. He kept using con. Con this, con. And finally, I pulled him aside and I was like, girl, you have got to stop saying,

con so much. This is not the UK. That is a word. At that point, like where we were doing auditions, like the whole panel we were in front of with all female. And I was like, some of them might be cool with it, but some of them might be getting really offended. And I'm like, you're cute little British accent only goes so far when you use it every time. I love that. Okay. I want to talk about next something that when I read your bio that I think is super duper interesting.

So you were raised in the Bible belt and a very religious culture and Obviously we live in the Bible belt and I was raised with like no religion at all, which is very strange for somebody. I know It was very very awesome, but lucky you to not have like self-dulternated and guilt and like all these weird and pressed upon you as a child. Yes, but one thing that I have always found so disturbing living here. So I had a friend about 15 years ago and I didn't have kids at the time, but she did and it was very obvious to me that her son was gay. And he was like 10 or 11, but she was pretty religious and it was kind of overtly religious. So she said to me one time, we're having coffee and she's like, you know, I've just told him, if you ever think

you're gay, that's just the devil. That's just Satan. And I said to my friend, that's kind of child abuse to say that. Like you shouldn't say that to him. Like threaten him with that. I think that's really damaging. I mean, I heard that all the time growing up, but yeah. Really, I want you to share with our listener a little bit about your childhood and your journey. And one question, because I want to ask it now, in case I forget, after you went through

what you went through in your childhood, do you think that your homosexuality saved you from that kind of life that you could have had? And you can get to that answer as you tell us about your story. Did it save me from still being a malverning with like nine kids and a wife? I hate absolutely. Oh, Lord, yeah, I mean, I grew up as a series of God, you know, and I categorized that as like the worst of the worst. And they're the tongue talkers, right?

Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. They're the, the pinnacle of the denominations that they even think Baptists are going to hell. Oh, wow. that they even think Baptists are going to hell. Wow. Mormons are going to hell. Presbyterians, Lutherans, anybody that is not the exact flavor of Christian

that they are is going to hell. Right. It's like, it's crazy. Like I remember growing up and like wanting to go to church with a friend who went to a Baptist church, and my parents would be like, oh my God, no, you can't go to a Baptist church. They will indoctrinate you to and you'll end up in hell.

They dance. So it's just again, you are made to believe that only the way that that preacher up there and your parents teach you, that is the only way you will have eternal life, that is the only way you will not burn in hell. Even the people who are also Christians, you know, per se, even the way they do it is going to send you to hell. So it, it, it doesn't shock me at all that evangelicals are like the biggest magas out there because young age, they are taught to believe what that preacher says is the only truth.

It doesn't matter if some other church is like, oh, well, maybe this guy that's married to like a prostitute and a stripper and like has, you know, done all these other crazy things. Maybe he's not the Messiah, you know, done all these other crazy things. Maybe he's not the Messiah, you know, maybe not a good Christian president, but no, it's they are brainwashing. Right. Only believe what their denomination tells him. So it's when back in 2016, everyone was like, Oh, there's no way he's going to win. There's no way he's going to win. I'm like, Oh, he's going to win. I'm absolutely going to win because I grew up in that mindset around those people and they believe their brainwash from a young age. And again,

you didn't go up in church. But people that are listening to go up in church, it's, oh, you got to have faith. So, you question anything. You're bad. Oh, no, you don't have faith. So you're on your way to health, you don't have to say. What amazes me, so obviously I grew up in the suburbs of Oklahoma City. So I was like, I'm probably still on so many prayer warrior lists, but I was like primed for evangelicals to recruit

because that's a huge part of their religion as the recruiting aspect of it. And so I tried because I wanted to fit in because all of my friends were like super bible thumpers and it was fellowship of Christian athletes. And I tried around like middle school, high school, but I was never truly indoctrinated. And so-

If you weren't rainwashed as a child. Right, so I approach most religions the same way people approach Greek mythology. They all equally sound kind of ridiculous, you know, like Noah and being 900 years old. Kangaroo's hobby. That was my that was my booze a lot. He was nine. But what amazes me about it as a non religious person is how much focus is put on others, either recruiting others to join,

or who's Bobby fucking, who's Pumps fucking? It's always, it's never seems to be about how do I make myself a better person in my own fucking business. It is the biggest busy body misery loves company, who's fucking who club I've ever seen in my life, and I've fucking had it. I have had it total freedom of speech and freedoms if you're a white Christian right everybody else know everybody else's

mere existence is coming for their freedom right right existing me being loving to me being able to marry who I want. That's not coming for your freedom. That's exactly right. Yep, that's it. Care of is a sponsor of today's episode. Jennifer, as you know, about two years ago, I had an aha moment when it came to my health and wellness routine.

Oh, I remember. Care of is a subscription service I started using that ships high quality personalized vitamins, supplements and powders directly to my door every month. What makes Care of so unique to me is that the packs and vitamins are personalized after you take an in-depth short quiz. Amazing. It's idiot proof.

I have incorporated Care of products in my daily life and wellness routine and have actually noticed a big difference in my energy level and my skin's vibrance. Oh I've noticed as well. I mean you are the star of the show. If you're ready to make a change in your wellness routine, give care of a try. For our listeners they will get 50% off your first care of order. If you go to takecareof.com and enter code had it 50. That's takecareof.com and enter code had it 50 today. Our next partner is Athletic Greens. I take AG1 by Athletic Greens literally every day. I gave AG1 a try because I'm an avid pickleball player. Let's face it, people.

I take AG1 in the afternoon right before my pickleball match and it makes me feel unstoppable. It makes me feel ready to go. It makes me feel like I'm doing something great for my body. I'm giving my body the nutrition. It cra, like I'm covering my nutritional bases. It is the healthiest thing you can do in under a minute. A.G.1 gives you increased energy and mood support and makes it easier to live your best life, and in my case, to be the best pickleball player. If you're looking for an easier way to take supplements,

athletic greens is giving you a free one-year supply of vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. So go to AthleticGreens.com slash hadit. That's AthleticGreens.com slash hadit. You got to check this stuff out, listener. Today's episode is supported by Henny Lev. Jennifer, I don't know if you noticed, but I looked extra-spelt in New York City. I thought you looked like a million bucks. Thank you.

The reason for that is I have discovered a new compression shapewear that is absolutely comfortable and does its job. Listeners Honeyleb is just as easy to put on as it is to take off. Shapewear shouldn't be hard. They have amazingly comfortable bras, tanks, and leggings for everyday support. Listeners, Henny Love is the shapewear that I love. Whether it's for a wedding event

or an everyday boost of confidence, Henny Love is the perfect plus one. Treat yourself to the best shapewear on the market and save 20% off at HennyLove.com with the code plus one. Treat yourself to the best shape we're on the market and save 20% off at honeylove.com with the code had it. That's 20% off at honeylove.com with the code had it. Now let's lighten it up a little bit since we've solved the world, the country's problems. Thank you, Bobby.

Okay, Bobby, it's time to play our game had it or hit it. Oh my God, welcome to Had it or hit it. I would hit it. Had it. Had it. I hit it every day sometimes twice a day. Had it or hit it. Silk flowers.

Oh no, Had it. Had it. I've had it. Absolutely had it. Pomp, tell them about the time that we met. Okay, so the first time I met Jennifer, she was coming over to my house and I was redoing like the ground floor kitchen. It was a hell of a-

She wanted it to be- I wanted it to be. To see the gay agenda, see how they push it. Right. I would be her wife tomorrow. I am really trying with this gay agenda, Kylie and I are with Pumps, but anyway, proceed. Okay, so she walks in my house and I hadn't met her before and she comes in and she's like, I said, I don't give a shit. You look just like your pictures. Sorry, I want

to interrupt one. No, no, no, no, no, I said, I don't really care. Like, just do what you think. I'm not real into it. I wouldn't even notice probably. And she goes, well, I can tell that because you have silk flowers in your entry hall on your dining room table. And then you have a picture. The only thing worse than silk flowers is pictures of silk flowers. And you've got both right here in the front room. And I was like head over heels and love them immediately. Or word art. A word art is terrible. It is a red flag. I walked into my desert home the other day. And again, we air be and be at out when we're not using it. And I walk in and like,

this house has been an architectural digest. Like it is very tastefully done. Right. Walk in the kitchen and on the ledge above the stove, there's a word art that says laugh. Oh, yeah. Somebody, some guests had brought and put it up there and the management company just just left it there, thinking it was part of the decor, even though they're there, multiple times a week and should know better. And I literally I walked in and I gasped. I was like,

no big, big gas. I went over and I grabbed it and I gasped. I was like, oh, no big gas. Like, I went over and I grabbed it and I threw it in the trash. No, it's word art. I cannot stand. I hate the hashtag blessed or the use of the word blessed or blessed blessings. It except in less it's in the sentence, bless your heart. That's correct. That's correct. No, I do love that. That's correct, which is also go fuck yourself as the three of us know. But when people say, I just, we are so very blessed.

I'm just like, shut the fuck up, I've had it. Word art is awful. Okay. Had it or hit it, hit it, meaning you will love it, Bobby, Starbucks. Hit it. Yeah. Although, I think yesterday was the first time I'd had it in months, I don't drink a lot of coffee anymore. I used to, now I kind of moved on to Celsius, which is probably not great either,

but the caffeinated like, it's an energy drink. Oh, okay. But I wouldn't put it in the same category as like a red bull or a rock star or something. Like it doesn't smell like drunken desperation. A non white trash energy drink. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you drink enough of them, you'll get a pump. Hubs is going to have one more and she's just going to be gonna be I got right. I need to buy some. Okay. Bobby had it or hit it influencers. I have it. I've had it. I've had it. You know, there are there are some there are some good ones out there. The ones I've had though are the ones that produce these so overly staged videos that they try to pass off as real on them. Like are you that big of an idiot? Or do you just think everyone else is that big of an idiot?

They've got to believe this bullshit. Right. I think they do believe the bullshit because I have a daughter in college. And I mean, she buys all that shit, have client and sinker. I've kind of, I've had it with influencers, but I'm also a part of the problem because I hate follow if you. So I don't, yeah, I don't, I don't think I follow. I follow a couple. I do. I don't had it or hit it. Karate chopped pillows. I had it.

I had it. Although, although you will see me often on queer, I doing some karate chopped pillows, but that's just because we need a shot of me doing something. And that's the quickest and easy thing to do before the hero walks to the door. And it looks very designer. I'll tell you what I've started to do. I just did an install before I came here. So I chop because I started designing in the 90s. So that's when I started my career.

I'm much younger than Poms if you were curious about that. For years it's not that much. I chop and then I'm like, no, that's out now. And then I do a side chop. So you can add that to career. I now do a top chop side chop. And then it makes the perfect like I had to install these mobile starfish. Yes, it's like, and then push it a little bit so it's not too choppy. So you can add that kind of and you can you could put you could put a jazz hand at the end. Do you love it? Okay, had it or hit it as we head into gay pride month rainbow capitalism. I mean, it's hard for me to say had it because I've definitely benefited from that rainbow capitalism, but I definitely think that there are some companies that should learn that being an ally isn't just slapping a rainbow on something once every doing. It's like Disney did where they backed

back the, against the Don't Say Gable. It's about activism year round, not just once a month, or once a year. That's true. That's true. So, are the intentions always great? No, a lot of times the intentions are just to make money. But I think visibility is so, so important. And I think that rainbow capitalism gives people that hope. They, you know, they'll... And at least, I mean, they're making money off of everything. And let's, I mean, we live in the biggest capitalistic market ever.

Let's make sure we're making if they're going to do it. Let's make money off of the good fight instead of just being racist pricks. You know, like I'm far more down with with that. I kind of, I'm with you that I think there are kids that, you know, like the friend I told you who was telling our kid that if you're thinking about being gay, it's Satan like that it's some sort of choice. That seeing that and knowing, okay wait,

something's wrong with my mom. I'm not the problem, it's this archaic viewpoint that is the problem. So I think that that can really help. Yeah, I do as well. And when I work with these companies and during pride and stuff, I always make them do a large donation to a charity that I work with. I'm like, if you're going to make money off of us, you need to give that money back to us.

I agree. I think that's really good. I think that's more. Bobby, I mean, I just feel like, I mean, I feel like we fucking crushed it. I feel like this was a slam doc. I feel like we solved so many fucking problems today. You have the most amazing charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent. You know what that means? Oh, see you next Tuesday. I love that means.

I'm on RuPaul's Drag Race. She's always like, I wanna see your charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent. And for like 20 seasons, no one ever realized that she's saying Kant, y'all. Or like five, six, six years ago, people finally started talking about it. Like, oh my God, all these years, she's been saying Kant.

And I was like, yeah, well, what's, yeah, you're dumb. I have to say, I'm a huge, queer, I fan, huge. And I'll tell you what, like, I was thinking about, why do I love that so much? Because I'm not a cryer at movies or anything. I'm a hard press to cry. But when I watch those episodes, like, the palpable change from, I don't like myself, I'm not comfortable in my own skin. I don't think I'm good enough. But when I watch those episodes like the palpable change from,

I don't like myself. I'm not comfortable in my own skin. I don't think I'm good enough. Like it's palpable by the end that they do. And it's such a feel good. So I kind of get teary a little bit. Tell our listener, I think you have a book coming out. Can you tell our listener about your new book? Yeah. So my new book comes out in September and it's available for pre-order now. And it's called Right at Home. For years people have been like, oh, you should do a design book or you should do a memoir and like when I do things, I want to do things

to help people and design books are beautiful. Don't get me wrong, but design books are expensive to produce. Thus they're expensive to sell. So pretty coffee table design books, not everybody can afford. And a pretty design book doesn't always necessarily really help people. So I decided to write a book about the intersection of mental health and design and about how your home

really affects every aspect of your life. And we dive into color theory and light and, you know, Feng Shui and an organization. And we really talk about how each and everything in your home, it really does affect your mental health. You like your home is like your phone charger. If you don't plug your phone in at night, or that cord has a short in it, your phone's not gonna make it through the next day

because it didn't get fully charged. Your home is your charger. You gotta really get fully charged when you're at home. So that way you can make it through life. And that's what the book is all about. Teaching people how to figure out what their style is and how to be okay with the fact that your style is your own. And it doesn't have to look like a magazine. And it doesn't have to be what designers say it is. It's about the things putting things in your

home that make you happy. I love that. I completely agree. And I get interviewed, you know, from time to time by interior design magazines. And they'll say, what are the hottest trends? I hate that question. I hate that question because number one, it's a trend, so I don't want to promote it because it's not going to be in for very much longer. And secondly, I always tell my clients, let's do what looks good and feels good for you. Like that's what's going to look best in this situation. So I'm so glad that you're addressing that because I think so many people, when it comes to projecting their personality

and how they feel onto their home, it's very emotional. And, you know, we're kind of interior designers slash psychologists slash marriage counselors, which is why I don't take a lot of individual personal homes. Yes. I mean, and you know, you're guiding these people through this thing. And so it is, it is a journey, which I've had it with the journeys, but that was a different episode. But I'm so glad that you're doing that. I cannot wait to get it.

I know, I'm excited. Bobby, I cannot tell you how much I loved having you on and how much your personal story through like from your upbringing to being such an incredibly intelligent and engaging and great advocate for men, women, boys, girls that have gotten out of an abusive religious situation and that you call it as such because I believe that it is and that you're helping other people that are in that situation by saying, Hey, you can get out of this and you can have an amazing life. And I just,

I feel that in my bones and it makes me so happy. Thank you. Thank you. Lots of admiration. Not just for your talent, but your story and how you've overcame it. That's really impressive. Yes. Bobby, thank you so much for telling us what you've had it with. And we are going to be much better people in the grocery stores with our shopping carts. Yeah, because I'm kind of an offender on that I was thinking. Bobby, thank you so, so much. Have a wonderful week and good luck with your book and the new season of Queer Eye were big fans. So fun to have you on your blast. Thanks so much. Bye. Bye. Okay. The hot shit tour just continues. I mean, he's the best. I love him. I personally like so much how outspoken he is. I agree. So I really love that. I love him. And I think this is so fun to have such a cool guy on our pod. So cool. I just really like him. He's fun and sweet and he's great at what he does. Please go give us a five star review and we are passionate about supporting

marginalized people. If you don't like that, go listen to a different podcast. We're not for you. Okay. You're in the wrong, wrong place. Follow us. Oh follow us on Patreon. That's where we're talking about the Pumps and the Speanship. Which is okay. Whatever. All right anyway We will see you next Tuesday. You next Tuesday. Bye listener I I'm John Glover. Emmy award winning researcher, John Glover, and I'm Marisa Pinson. Critically unacclaimed TV writer, Marisa Pinson. Aww.

And we're the host of the new podcast on brand with John and Marisa. Join us every week for an exploration of the world's most interesting and iconic brands, like Walmart. Do they still have the old people who say welcome to Walmart? No, they get rid of them. You just want more old people in the store. I want every staff member to be over 90 and Heinz. Heinz. Heinz. Heinz. I say and while you learn about these legendary brands, you'll also learn a bit about us. Hey John,

do you still sleep in shoes? There's probably, I would say probably three times a year I fall sleeping shoes. You told me the thing that you should never look under a Costco chicken. Well, I don't think you should ever look under a chicken. So tune in every Wednesday for a brand new episode of On Brand with John and Marissa. Available May 24th wherever you get your podcasts. See you there. you