I've Had It - Sad Fishing with Heather McDonald

Episode Date: May 2, 2023

Jennifer and Pumps are joined by special guest and host of Juicy Scoop, Heather McDonald. The three discuss sadfishing, pageant queens and Heathers recent return from the dead. Jennifer also tells a titillating tale of one married mans attempt to whisk her away on a crazy train ride.. Subscribe to our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/IveHadItPodcast Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps Special Guest:  Heather McDonald: @heathermcdonald Check out: @JuicyScoop  

So we're supposed to start the podcast. Are we ready? Nope. One, two, three. We can roll with it. That's pretty good. All right. Before we get into what you've had it with, I want to say thank you to all of our listeners

for being so supportive now that we have sponsors. Yes. They have not been assholes about it. Right. I was afraid that I'll be like, fuck it. I don't want to listen to that. not been assholes about it. Right, I was afraid they'd all be like, fuck it. I don't want to listen to that. They were so nice about it.

So nice. So supportive. And we have all these international listeners, which is super exciting. That's like my favorite thing ever. I know. I mean, that's really fun. We are hot shit.

It's unbelievable. International hot shit. International hot shit. Not just in the UK with my butt play. Well, Pumps, what have you had it with today? What I've had it with, Jennifer, is Bachelorette parties. And let me tell you why, okay? Back in the day, when you and I got married, you would like go out, you know, dick straws, whatever bride, we're a little veil, no big deal.

Now, it's like, whatever bride, we're a little veil, no big deal. Now, it's like a whole weekend, right? So it's a girls trip. So I'm down with that, I can do that. If you're not mixing friends, if it's just your group of friends that you left, because we did a couple of those back in the day and the debauchery was just unbelievable.

But my point to all this is, I had a friend tell me this week she was invited to a bachelor at party at Disney World. Oh for fuck's sake. I was like I would tell her number one I'm not coming to your bachelor at party and number two I don't want to be in your wedding anymore. Why would anyone want to have a bachelor at party at Disney World not to mention how expensive it is. Well, these are the same people that are having gender reveal parties. I guess that's right, but a bachelor at party is supposed to be fun.

But these are the same people that are over-celebrating everything. Right. A bachelor at party used to just be one night. Right, one night. Now it's this big weekend that has to be Instagram produced. Right. Everything's just overproduced. It's overproduced, over celebrated. You can't just go out, like when we were getting married, we were able to go to a bachelor at party with no cell phones. Correct. And get snockered. Yes.

With asses of ourself with zero evidence. Right, no, that is so true. Yeah. Like I'm thinking of this one bachelor party that we did in New Orleans. And if there would have been phones, oh my God, it was bad. Oh yeah. I mean, we were like, Jello shots off the boobs on the bar.

And I do remember waking up in front of my hotel room door, like in the hall, outside my door. I had a lucky dog in my hand, like I'd gotten it, but I never ate it because I passed out in the hall. This is what we call hashtag almost. You almost made it to that bed. Almost. I mean, you were almost there.

Almost there, but I wasn't. Here's my thing. If it's just my group of friends that I love, like what we've traveled with, then that's great. But if you've got like the work friends and the husband's friends and all that, it's less fun. Then you've got the overproduction, then you've got the worry of the cell phone,

and then you tell me, have to get a Disney world. Like, I'm out. I am out. If you're invite list starts with I have to include these people so I don't hurt their feelings. You just fucked yourself out of a good time. You absolutely fucked yourself out of a good time. Right. The greatest thing about getting older is you don't give a fuck. No. You can just invite whoever you want to. And if somebody's feelings get hurt, tough titties. It's not my problem. Yeah, you have to move on down the road. The question would be, why do you get your feelings

hurt if you're not invited? I would be delighted. It's a gift. It's a gift to not be invited, especially to Disney world. Let me tell you what I've had it with. Okay, I don't mean. And I've really had it with this. Oh, good. So if you're trying to call an airline, So if you're trying to call an airline, a Wi-Fi provider, your bank, right, a credit card company, you go through a circle jerk of robots. Yeah. Screaming representative. I do that. You take a manual quiz, you enter in the last four of your social, your destination, you've

teed up all the information, you've gone through the circle jerk of every department possible of robots. And then finally, you get a person, we're talking 30 to 45 minutes later, then has to verify your identity. And you're like, what the hell have I been doing this whole time? Was this just for fun? Right, because I didn't have any fun at all. It wasn't fun for me at all.

And I don't know why, like if there was an airline that said, when you call us, you will talk to a live human being. I would exclusively fly that airline. Right. If there was a bank that said when you call us, you will exclusively talk to a human being. I would immediately use that bank, right? Here's an example.

Last year, Josh and I are at the French Open, Roland Garros. We're about to go see Rafa Nadal play Novak Jokovic, big match, right? So we go to buy like a French sandwich at the concession stand. And Josh's card, it's like fraud alert. So I have to call Citibank. I'm calling Citibank and this woman gets on the phone and she's like, are you in France? I go, yeah, we're in France, it's not a fraud alert.

I need the card to work. Right. And she was like, well, I need to verify your identity. So I go through a few questions and then she says, what's your bank account number? I thought I wasn't supposed to give that information out. What? Exactly! Make up your mind. Right. Because they say don't ever give your bank account number to anybody.

I bank it chase. Right. This was a city bank credit card. So then I'm fighting with this woman. Right. And I'm supposed to be happy because I'm going to go watch Rafa and we all know I love. But instead, you're making me say, I'm fighting with Citibank, trying to confirm my identity and it's just turned into all this fuckery.

And there's the customer service aspect of everything has just been blown. It no longer exists. That's so true. You either have a yak mouth that customer services you to death with too much information on one end of this. Right, you're like, I want my credit card to work. That's it. That's the list.

On the other end of the spectrum, you've got robot circle jerk you have to go through until you finally get online with a real live person that then starts asking you questions where you've received mixed information. Am I supposed to give you my social? Right. I thought it was give you my social? Right. I thought it was just the last four. Right. Anyway, I have had it up to my eyeballs.

And I just think corporations, you'll make enough God damn money. We're already tipping everybody for you because you won't pay the livable wage. We tip way beyond the waiters. We tip everybody to death now. Have a person answer your phone and maybe take five mil off your CEO's employee, you know, base salary so that we can talk to somebody. Right. I've had it. I'll tell you what is interesting. You know

how you said you screen representative. Back in the day when that automated system first came on, if you would just hit Z-row, you would immediately get an operator. No, they eliminated the Z-row. No, they completely hang up on you, and you have to start over. And then you say, representative, and they're like, we know you want to represent it,

but you have to answer a few more questions. Right. And it's just complete bullshit. It's total bullshit. As you can see, listener, we are wound up like cheap clocks already about nine minutes into the episode. Welcome to I've had it. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. We call her pumps. And there's been a little bit of stuff going on in the comments section about who the star of our show is, right? There have been groups

of people that say pumps is the star. Right. And now there's been some contradictory evidence where some people are cheering. I've seen a hashtag out there. Have you seen it Kylie? Hashtag team Jennifer. Hashtag team Jennifer. So listen, if you will go to Apple, after you give us a five star review for this fantastic sensation of a podcast and right in the review who you think the star of the show is Hashtag team Jennifer please feed our narcissism. Okay I'm really excited about our guest. Our guest today is fantastic. She is a big deal. Yeah she really is a big deal. Which kind of makes us a big deal. With all of our international listeners and this guest.

They're in this hot shit guest. We have to be a big deal. Yeah, two plus two equals four people. Okay, listener, she is the host of Juicy Scoop. Let's get Heather McDonald on here to tell us what she has had it with. Hi Heather. Hi, thanks for having me.

Yes, we're so excited to have you. what she has had it with. Hi Heather. Hi, thanks for having me. Yes, we're so excited to have you. So we were doing a little online sleuthing about you. Okay, and I came across like some people think you're dead? Oh yes. What is that? So I fainted on stage when I was at the Atempie Improv. I don't know why I fainted. I have never fainted before. I've had every test.

I'm perfectly fine. So then they did this movie called Suddenly Dead. It's something like that. And it's about this, you know, on YouTube, about how the vaccine, like, you know, is causing people to faint and die and die. And then so the guy goes, you know, I'm here to talk for the people who are, you know, I'm here to talk about,

I'm here to talk for the people who are no longer here, you know, and then that was me. And I was like, I mean, I don't even know what I should be more offended by, that like no one bothered to type in my name. Like, what a nightmare. That is the thing. I mean, not to mention you broke your skull. I mean, it kind of was a nightmare.

It kind of wasn't. I mean, not to mention you broke your whole. I mean, it kind of was a nightmare. It kind of wasn't. I mean, I finally went viral, but it was like for not the right reasons. And also like not funny. Like a lot of it was like, this is why chicks aren't funny. I'm like, I agree. Like I, I do stand for an hour and a half. The closer is your best bit, the closer you don't start with your closer. Right. I was just like, blah, blah, blah, hi, everybody, hi, Tempe, you know, I wasn't like using my best material the first two minutes, you know.

And so I'm like, I agree, women aren't funny either. Why are we even on this earth? That's the minimum. Well, we're glad you're here. We're glad your school's okay. I am fine. I'm perfectly fine. Well, this considering all of that that you went through,

you might find this venue somewhat therapeutic. Because what we do is we just do some world-class shit talking. I love it. I, I, I, I, I find you guys on TikTok. I love it. And so you kind of cover in your podcast, Juicy Scoop, all the scoop that's going on with the celebs. We're on the streets with the people. Covering the fuckery that going on with his celebs. We're on the streets with the people. I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I like it. And I is people filming themselves crying. Oh my gosh, that's me.

For likes. What on earth, why would you do that? And there's certain versions. There's somewhere like something happens. And I believe that the influencer or reality star whoever has a big call, I believe something happens and they were upset. But then I can tell that they had to kind of bring back

the tears and they're not good actors. Try to get that moment back. And it's like, oh, I'm sorry, you guys. This is just so upsetting. And like, I believe this person was upset 15 minutes ago. Right. I just believe that. But it just feels like all of a sudden they're like,

oh, shit, this is the time to like pick up the phone. The other thing is fucking eating while you're telling a story. Like why do I have to see just fucking shoveling shit? And you're, I don't know. I'm like, as much as I love it all, I also, I've also had it. I had it. With also I've also had it With the the crying online there's a term for this so you've heard of cat fishing right yes This is called sad fishing love it. I've not heard that Kylie

Yeah, Kylie look this up and so sad fishing is using your sadness to get comments and shares Yeah, and you're making misery profitable. Yes. And another thing they do is sometimes they sometimes people do it just like have the phone and they're crying. But I saw another one where the girl propped up the phone like to the side of her. So you just see the side of her like this like this. Like and then she's crying and she writes, like, I just went on a date. And the guy said, you know, I didn't realize you're 42 and you're too old to date. And so I got in my car and I started to cry.

And then I saw that one of the comments was like, so weird. It really, this wasn't even my original idea with someone's comment. And it was like, it's so weird how people are filming themselves crying. And it's so weird that she worked on that angle. Totally. It's just, yeah, it's like really, it's really strange. Everything is becoming produced for social media.

Your engagement is produced for social media. The gender of your child and on and on. Now we are producing like meltdowns. Yeah. Like a meltdown. your engagement is produced for social media, the gender of your child and on and on. Now we are producing like meltdowns. Yeah, like meltdown. You're going to produce it and trot it out on Instagram. And I just, I'm so turned off by that. Like maybe I'm a sociopath and have a problem with empathy.

That's a possibility. But when I see somebody crying online, it is such a turn off to me. To the media, I want to immediately pass by it. What about people, and you've probably seen this on social media, where somebody will post like a hospital bracelet. And that's it. Yes. That drives me bananas.

No description. And then you're like, who's in the hospital? What's going on? And if I don't comment on it, I'm trolling. And you find out three days later, somebody's kid rolled their ankle. But you're like, are you kidding me? That you grandstanded with this cryptic pose

for three days, we think somebody's dying and we've got a rolled ankle? That really does piss me off and it's just such a thirsty move if it's not something serious. If it is something serious, and you want that support, like, then yes, but like yes, when it's not something serious. If it is something serious and you want that support, like, then yes, but like yes, when it's nothing big deal. But like, I remember like that would be,

we worked with this one woman when I was on a TV show that really did want attention. So she would like come into the meeting and she'd just have her like arm out, you know, with the cotton ball and she'd be like, like, just like waiting for us to be like, what happened, you know, pretty soon we were just like, no, we're not going to ask you what's wrong with you anymore, Gypsy, you know,

whatever her name is, Gypsy Rose. Yes, that's totally. I mean, what's going to be the next thing? You're just going to take a photo of your feet in the stir-ups like, this pap spear comes back, okay? Like, I don't need to know. Well, I want to segue over to your second thing that you've had it with, which is people eating online.

And I want to share a story with you in pumps that I've never told pumps before. So I'm an interior designer. And this was probably late 2020, early 2021, like right in the COVID era, and a guy emails, and he's bought a house like a two or three million dollar house. He wants to completely renovate it. So we schedule a Zoom.

He's a physician. The Zoom is probably around one pan. So I get on the Zoom and he's like, oh, hey, nice to meet you. And he puts this huge bowl of noodles in front of him and just starts eating these noodles and slurping and thinking out of his mouth. He's talking to me about the potential remodel while like, I can see the food in his mouth.

I declined the project. Just because it was so gross. I'm like, if I can't go through a Zoom with this motherfucker, there's no way I can design his house because that's like a year year year and a half long project You have a very emotional relationship with people who's home you design for like you really get in the trenches with them You know their dogs you know their kids you know Which of the two spouses is kind of crazy right? I couldn't get past the smacking on the zoom

I was like I'm sorry. I don't think I'm gonna be able to take this project on I don't think I'm a good fit And I declined it because of this eating on the zoom. I was like, I'm sorry, I don't think I'm gonna be able to take this project on. I don't think I'm a good fit. And I declined it because of this eating on the zoom. Yeah. And then I bet he was dying to get you. Right. Is it a matter of money? I'll pay double. Yeah. Like the deterrent someone down. He did follow up and he's like, can you recommend anybody else? Are you sure you don't want to take the job? And I'm like, I'm so sorry. I just accepted another job. I'm not not gonna be able to take it. You're like, I can't recommend anybody else, but I know a great Chinese suit place. You might just love those. So Heather, you growing up, we did a little recon on you online. Your mother was a beauty queen. I love that.

on you online. Your mother was a beauty queen? I love that. Yes, she would tell you about it all the time. She was a badger beauty at the University of Wisconsin and military ball queen the same year, but you know, in like 1960 or whatever it was, she was like very hot. I'm very proud of it. Yeah, I would be proud to hit you. Did you research what I was actually in a pageant? No. Do share. So I went to go do Miss Tarzanah. And there was no talent because it was miss, it was a, so Miss USA was no talent.

Miss America was talented. Right. Yeah. So this was part of Miss USA. So there was no talent. But the woman thought I was so funny that she was like, when we get to the part where I ask you questions,

I'm gonna have you answer a share because I did impressions. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Anyway, she was completely smoking, glowing smoke up my ass. And like we had all these practices before and stuff. And I was like 100% convinced, like I don't know if I wanna win,

but like I'm gonna go really far in this thing. At the last minute she goes, I just got heard from this woman who is also going to join the contest. And she was like a professional pageant girl who like realized that this little shitty pageant in called Mr. Zana had no idea what the fuck they were doing. She came in and she, she fricking won. Oh, I'm not anybody, not anybody who even, she didn't even live in California. She literally like flew on the plane like two weeks before. She was a ringer.

She was a ringer. She was a ringer. She brought in a ringer to the mysteryer, and that's some shit. And then I did not even make the top 10. You know what, I have a, I have a very flat ass and I just don't think you can have a flat ass and be an Apache. You know what I miss America with the flat ass. It is a TNA contest. I mean,

there's an idea out about it. Right. Yeah, and I never knew I had a flat ass until like seven years ago. I was almost to be in a warming who told you, um, oh, when, when, when big ass has got in is when people let me know I didn't have one. Well, the thing is, you don't know because you don't see it. Right. So like in the whole life, you're like, oh my God,

it looked great in the stress. Like, oh, my boobs look good. Like, oh, I have nice legs. And then like you didn't realize that everyone behind you was like miserable, you didn't know. That's the way it was. And I always think that too,

because you guys were on a reality show. I'm always like, God, I think it's hard to be on a reality show because I would have to see myself walking like the back of me. Yeah. I mean, I've seen it what I've acted and stuff, but you don't, you know, you don't see it as much as you would on a reality show. Also, like the back of your hair is a big thing. It is a big thing. And hearing your voice, you know, you're so into the

entertainment industry by now, but the first time we were on the reality show, when I would hear my voice, you know, you're so into the entertainment industry by now, but the first time we were on the reality show, when I would hear my voice, like who is that? I was like, it's a really weird thing to hear your own voice because it sounds different in your head than it does. And then seeing yourself on TV, I mean, that was such a trip. It was weird. Well, whenever I was on TV, like, whether it was a guest spot or a hostel, Chelsea lately, I would, I would watch it, but sometimes I'd put it off. Like, I put it, I would be on the DVR. In fact, like,

the one time I was on watch from Hamza, I've actually never watched it. And then like, one day I came home and my husband's like, I got a better deal on the dish network. And I'm like, no, and then like, call the TV, you know, like it was disappeared. I had no idea. But anyway, I didn't, I would always kind of like, oh, like kind of dread it. Sometimes I'd be presently surprised and whatever. But when I first did the podcast, I was like, okay,

I know how I'd feel about hearing my voice, you know? And I loved it. Did you? I have no problem listening to the podcast ever. I listen to it and my son goes, what kind of monster listens to their own podcast? I'm like me. Her son, this is so funny because he'll text me

all the time, her oldest son, she has three. He'll text me all the time and he'll say, hey Jen, my mom is just sitting there watching your reels on Instagram and your TikToks and she's dying laughing at the two of you. I mean, it's just, and I can picture her doing it and I think it's rather adorable that she loves it so much.

So we get, one of the internet memes that people throw at us on TikTok or on YouTube or Twitter is that they say that we look like the white chicks and I think you're very familiar with. Oh! Yes. So, um, yes, I wrote white chicks with the Wayne's brothers. I worked on Kenan, Everwains late night talk show.

Then I, they brought me into write this other movie that got shelved that was kind of going to be like a parody of alien movies. And then I saw that they sold the idea of this movie about they basically was it was a spoof on Paris and Nikki Hilton in the 2000s. You know, when they were like running havoc and you know, in the hamsters. So then they had this idea. And so then I was like, are you going to have me write on this movie? Because I mean, I think you need to lease one white chick consultant, you know, like, and so they already had like the movie and kind of the characters, whatever,

but that I went in and and contributed and wrote some scenes that I got to be a part of because I got to be the sales person in the scene where Marlon and Sean are trying on clothes with the girls and, um, and, you know, I love, I love that it's like such a hit and such a cult favorite and that like people are like learning the dances. And I love that movie. And my kids and I, I mean, we would watch it like if everybody was bored, it was like, oh my god, what are we gonna do? Let's watch white chicks and everybody could get on board with that. And we did do the dances and all that. So, you know, people always say, is we're gonna be a white chick's too? Is there going to be a white chick's too?

And, you know, I don't, I mean, I'm not like in touch with the guys and stuff, but like, you know, we follow each other and everything. And I always said, you know, and this was like years ago, like seven years ago, I go if they ever write a white chick's too, because it was about, you know, Sean and Marlon were FBI agents who then had to be women to solve this crime. And I'm like, it has to be, now that they're older, it has to be that a real housewife has caused a crime. And they have to go solve it. Seven years later, we've got Jen Sean Frisen. I mean, like, I still think that's the way they got to go. They got to, if they had to do it, they have to infiltrate real housewives and stuff. But then I think with, you know, the trans movement, I think then they said, oh, we can't do this now. We can't do it. Because it's on it. But now I feel like, I feel like now the pendulum swinging

back where people are like, who cares? That's not what it was about. And the fact that women, there isn't one white woman that I have ever heard from of any point that was like, I was offended that you had an anorexia joke in there. Like, are you kidding me? Right. I love that so many people like it and that it was, you know, it's still so well received. And they, and everyone gets that it was like so all in just like good fun and comedy. And like,

it wasn't anything bigger than that. And I wish more things would be like that. But, you know, so true. Well, Heather, we have a game we call had it or hit it. And so I'm going to list some things off and you tell us if you've had it with that or if you would hit it. Oh my god. Welcome to had it or hit it. I would hit it. I had it. I hit it every day, sometimes twice a day. Had it or hit it. Ozempic. I think it's a fucking wonder drug and I think people, I think what the real thing is, the people that are being nasty about it are people in the diet industry that are like, what the hell am I going to do now? So you're trying to be like, don't go on it.

But I think why people are against it are like people that were always had the privilege of being thin, but they don't want to see the rest of the world or their friend that maybe was even prettier in the face than them also. Like they don't like they're like you could have one fucking thing. You can either have that pretty face and be a size 10. Because I'm a size zero and I look like skeleton and I'm not gonna. You're no no fair. You you cheated. You cheated.

You took it away from diabetes. I'm like like like they literally went to like a diabetic ward and like shot out of people's hands as they like are like, like, they literally went to like a diabetic ward and like shot out of people's hands as they like are like in a, you know, falling over down the stairs. That's not the case. Like, right. Doctors like, do you want it? And you're like, yeah, I guess I do. Why not? Yeah, I mean, like, what the hell is wrong with people? Like, so I say, I've had it with the anger towards it. I am with it for any kind of thing that is working for someone,

whether it's a diet drug or a spank, sucking you in and making feel better. I mean, is that cheating? Is getting braces cheating? Did God mean for you to have fucked up teeth? I mean, God created plastic surgeons. You know, they're human students. So are there talents not supposed to make us feel better?

Is it cheating that you put mascara on your eyelashes? Because you really aren't supposed to have that dark of eyelashes? Like, yeah. Okay. Had it or hit it, Nick and Vanessa Lache. So I did watch the, the love is blind. They were pretty, she, basically he barely spoke in the reunion.

And I don't know why he got in trouble. Well, I don't know. Well, he got in trouble, you know, for, you have to go to anger management. So you know about that. I heard that, but what do you do? Oh my god, it was so like 2006. It feels so weird. He and Vanessa were out like in Beverly Hills on a busy street. And this female paparazzi saw them and she whipped, you know, snapped her camera.

He freaks out and starts to like scream at her and tries like grab her camera or her phone through her window and all this stuff. And so it was so bizarre. So I felt like that whole thing was to get attention somehow. Right. I'm going to say I've had it with them. And I, I do think you need professional hosts to do those type of shows because you need right. Someone who knows how to move the show along. Right. Right. But I don't really think there it. I think now that you say that, I predict they'll get fired. But I think they will. That's fine.

Had it or hit it? Cats. Currently I don't have a cat, but I did have a couple cats in my life, two cats in my life. See, I hate cats. I think cats are great, but I'm not looking to get another.

Because they are kind of bitchy and they don't really cuddle up or anything. I have a cat and she is overweight. She has diabetes. She totally needs to be on a zimpyc. She's like 14, she's lazy, she doesn't grime herself. I have to brush her. She drives me fucking crazy,

but I'm such a nut about taking care of my animals. So I give her diabetes shots. I do all the stuff I'm supposed to do, but every time the vet comes, and my vet is excellent. She is an excellent vet. I'm like, Tiffany, how long do you think we're looking at here? Like, what's the math in that? She has well-girl cats live a long time, and I'm like, she's 14. With diabetes. With diabetes, but I wonder if they have like cat ozumbic. I might like her better if she got in better shape. I mean, maybe she take care of herself better. She just doesn't groom herself. And I have her on the diet cat food.

And this thing is bloomed up like you wouldn't believe. It's just unbelievable. I just don't like cats period. Good luck with her. Thank you. You should look. I had it or hit it. Tom Sandeval.

Well, I've definitely, I mean, I've had it with him as a person, but like the drama of it is really fascinating. And the reason why is, because I know a lot of people are like, why are we still talking about this? And the reason it is so fascinating is in the history of all reality shows from the beginning of time, there has been infidelity, there has been cheating, there has been, you know, someone's husband who's fooled around or fooled around with a man, even rumored to be whatever. But there's never been two cast members that carried on at covert affair where they deceived

their cast members and their partners and covert affair where they deceived their cast members and their partners and their best friend all for seven months while cameras rolled. Well, I mean, I hear about it. I don't watch that show, but I hear about the tidbits and the girls that work for me, they're millennials. And I mean, they are like tap the vein, inject it in. It's so good. They cannot get enough of it. And I knew with your podcast, she would be all up in that shit. Yeah, I think I just thought it was like fascinating and weird.

Yeah, I think that's why. And I think people are just like, what would I do in that situation? And who's truly wrong? And then like how far is it gone? And you know, what's the truth? And then when you watch it, it's like, now you go back and you can see all these little like moments.

Right. Like, oh my god. And so it's almost like watching an episode of like a clue or a date line or something, but it's van or pump because you're like, oh my God, look in the corner. Like, so I think it's almost like an interactive like viewing situation now. Right. Right. You know, good looking dude cheats on girlfriend. That is not a big news flash.

But best friend. Yes. That is the part where I've been hit on by married man, and I'm sure y'all have been too. And my response is always like, are you kidding me? You're married. That's disgusting. I mean, I slice and dice the man immediately for the sake of women. Like, you know, there's a million fish in the sea, Betty, and you ain't it. Like, that is not happening. And I let him know because I think it's just so disgusting and disrespectful to him. I think it's disrespectful to me.

And I think it's disrespectful to the wife and or live in girlfriend. And so that, I can see that component being really titillating because you expect your girlfriends to have your back. And to advocate for you when you're not around, particularly with your boyfriend or partner or husband. And so that is just an egregious girl code violation.

Now he's not off the hook. He is a mother fucker, no doubt about it. And he deserves all the brow beating he's getting. But the betrayal for the girl that was cheating on, that is, that is. It's a double whammy too. It's the person you're dating and your best friend. I mean, it's like really bad.

That would be like, if you fuck Josh. Oh, God. Oh. I just, you know, it is interesting what you're saying about how like men would kind of hit on you. And I do think that's true, you know, as we were moms at schools or whatever. Right. You know, you're doing stuff with other couples and you're doing stuff with dads and

you're doing the chili cook off or whatever. Right. You know, you're doing stuff with other couples and you're doing stuff with dads and you're doing the chili cook off and whatever. And there'd be like what I call fishing. Toad over there for their kind of. Toad, it's not a full hit on. It's like, Oh, what Starbucks do you go to or or yeah, you know, I remember being a babysitter at 12 years old. And I was babysitting the girls like I'm having a party but I just

want you to like come and help with the kids fine. So I'm like in the kitchen and I'm seeing this these two married couples and the girls shaking a martini thing and the someone else's husband is like, Oh, do that again. And she goes and he's like, yeah, and I remember being 12 and being like, Oh, those two are fucking like, I do like what's happening? It's true. They throw out a fishing line, and they see. So there's degrees of hitting on. Mary can do it in degrees.

They throw it a line like a text that is innocuous at first, but your husband's not copied on it. And it's like, hey, where did you say that you bought those, you know, nice filet mignon and you're like, all foods. And then it's like about meat. But then that's just the way it goes. But then you get to the most, you know, the most direct, come on. And I've had men do that to me

before. And that's when I tell me, wait, I want to hear then what's the most Iraq tell me. Okay. I remember which one the crazy train. Oh my God. Oh my God. Okay. So I got this text message from this guy who's an attorney, practice law in the same circles that my husband did. He sends me a text and I mean, this is verbatim.

It's like, Hey Jennifer, how's it going? You know, they now have trains from Oklahoma City to Chicago. And I thought it would be so fun if you and I went and spent the weekend in Chicago. I don't think Josh would mind too much. But I mean, if you wanted, I could get separate cabins, but maybe we could share one. And I am like, what?

What? In the actual fuck, did this mother fucker just send me, I immediately call her, this is what, 15 years ago. Right. I immediately call her and I'm like, brace for impact. We, when we couldn't believe it. Here comes the dramatic reading. And I read it to him, we're dying laughing. Of course, I immediately read it to my husband

because I'm like, this is just incredible. I mean, I was incredulous that somebody was so brazen. And so we have so brazen from that date have called it the crazy train, the crazy train to Chicago date. What how did you respond? I think I just said, you know, his name, thank you so much for the invitation, but I am married and have at the time I had a baby. Two toddler.

Two toddler. And I'm not going to be able to make it. And I think that would be disrespectful to Josh. I mean, clearly the man, I didn't say like you're sick, you're gross, but I think I was so shocked at how direct it was, the crazy train to Chicago. Yeah. So my mom back in the day, my dad was in advertising,

like, you straight out of like Mad Men. Like, you've ever watched that show. You've literally like that guy. So my dad, it would like, would always be like, tell my mom with like a hardly any notice, like, I'm bringing this client over, this boss over, whatever. So they could make some like fabulous dinner,

like some 1970s dinners of like, you know, devil eggs and I don't know what people had back then. And then like the next day, the guy showed up in the middle of the day at the door and she's like, oh hi. She's like, well, Bob's not here. He's, you know, at the office and he goes, I know.

Oh my God. I just came to see you. That's crazy. And she's like, well, would you like some lemonade? And he goes, I know, oh my God. I just came to see you. That's crazy. And she's like, well, would you like some lemonade? And he goes, yeah, I love it. So she was so like innocent. My mom was so innocent. Like she didn't even realize that he was absolutely like,

this is the 70s, you know, I guess people were swinging whatever. And my mom was really hot as she told the world. And so I think that whatever she, and she was really charming and outgoing. So he probably, whatever thought that she was somehow flirting with him, which she would never, she was super Catholic and like virgin when she was married and so. But so she, she is so after like never appeared to old and they like tell us the story.

And I'm like, Dad, like, when did you find about the story? He's like, I didn't find out about it until like two years ago. And my dad was a marine and stuff. And she's like, I knew if I told your father that he would like beat him up, lose his job, right? All this stuff. So I, you know, I had to be very politely like, I'm not interested. And I would never cheat on my husband. And like, please leave now. And I won't say anything. And she never did. But like I was like, oh, then here's the other juicy story that happened in our neighborhood. My there was this couple of the extra to my parents.

And my mom would wanted to get these Girl Scout outfits for my sister and I. So she goes to the lady, she's like, you know, your girls are older, can I get those Girl Scout outfits? Do you think she we could have them instead? And she was like a real bitch about it. And she was like, no, whatever. No, I don't think so. But I was like, okay, said all of a sudden she goes to her mailbox and this, she gets this letter that was accidentally put in her mailbox, like, like hand put it and

not mailed, that was meant for the woman. And it was this love letter from the woman's Protestant pastor. And they were clearly screwing and she was married with kids. And so my mom opened up the letter and like brought it, like she's the novel of a knocked on the door and said, oh, hi, you know, I'm so sorry, I guess this mistakenly got put into my mailbox. And then the woman's eyes just were like, you know, this big.

And then she said, any chance you want to reconsider giving us this girl's cap. And you're like, yeah, you got her everything. Do you want anything else? You know, like, oh, that's good stuff right there. Yeah. Yeah. Like, it's like, it's so funny, you know, because it's like, yeah, all that you always think like older people were like, so, you know, innocent, because they're all just like, oh, but they're the ones that are like, lived the wildest lives, you know?

Right. They just didn't talk about it. No, nor did they produce it on their smartphones. Yes. Nor did they put it, nor was their Facebook evidence or anything of the sewer, because you know that we're able to do a lot more crazy shit than we, yeah, for sure. Yeah, yeah, when your husband can't like track your phone and your wife can't, you know, ruin your

text messages on the eye cloud, like, yeah, there's a lot of cheat. There's a lot of it. Bones make it easier to cheat, but it's also makes it very easy to get caught, you know, totally, totally, totally. Well, Heather, we cannot thank you enough for make it easier to cheat, but it also makes it very easy to get caught, you know. Totally. Totally. Totally. Well Heather, we cannot thank you enough for joining us on I've had it. We too have had it with the produced misery online. And I will never work for that guy that gave me that eating interview to design his house. I mean, that was a hard pass to say the least. But thank you so much for joining us. You're a big deal. And to come on was a hard pass to say the least. But thank you so much for joining us.

You're a big deal and to come on this little podcast of ours means the world to us. Thank you so much, Heather. Well, thank you. Thank you. And I'll just do my plugs. It's juicy scoop every Tuesday, Thursday. I have Patreon on Friday, which is all my more intimate stuff. Everything is at Heather McDowell.net. I do have a bunch of shows happening this summer from Vegas to San Diego, Napa, San Francisco, East Coast. And I hope people come see my standup some are live GCSK if summer like con combos and I have other funny comedians with me. So please check it out and come see us live.

And it's really great talking to you guys. And congratulations on your success. I think that this is really fun. That you guys were so funny together. I'm glad that you are able to still work together and be part of the podcast world. Yeah, it's been, we love it. It is so much fun.

It's so much more fun, I think. Yeah, we like it more than the TV world, for sure. Yes. Yeah, good, good, great. All right, thanks so much, Heather. Have a great day. Bye. Bye, good. Good. Great. All right. Thanks so much. Heather. Have a great day. Bye. Bye Heather. I Had totally forgotten about the crazy trend story. I I knew that was the immediate story. I mean, that was just fucking unreal. That was unbelievable. Surely

That was like before smartphones. I would get anything to have a screen. I had a cell phone So it was a text message, but I don't think it was like a smartphone where you could take a screenshot. No, I think we were still doing the AAA. Yeah, yeah, back in that day. I mean, it was a long time ago, but yeah, that was bad. I remember the kids were so little. So little.

And I remember, I would just be like crazy trained. I mean, we would just die laughing, no matter where we were, if we started seeing crazy trainer, it came over the radio, you and I would die laughing. And then I would see this laughing no matter where we were. If we started seeing crazy trainer, it came over the radio. You and I would die laughing. And then I would see this guy all the time at Starbucks in my neighborhood.

And he was always like smiling and wanting to talk to me. And I was literally just like, we are not talking. We're not talking. We're not talking. We're not going to Chicago. We're not having sex. None of it. None of it's happening.

None of it is happening here in the Starbucks on the crazy train. It's not happening. No. Oh my gosh. Well, listener, we cannot thank you enough for joining us today. Please go rate our podcast on Apple and write a review and in the review reveal. Who you think is the star of our show? And Kylie is also a candidate. Or Richard. Or Richard, that's correct. And Heather McDonald, which is so much fun. She's a blast. Fantastic. So good.

So good. You can see why she's had an incredible career in the entertainment industry. Yeah. While we faceplant. That is so true. Join us on Patreon, subscribe there, follow us on social media if you don't already. You're missing out on all of these fantastic reels that Kylie literally makes and then

it's like a little child throwing a grenade in TikTok and then turning around and walking up. And we have no idea it's happening. Yeah, and everybody just wound up in the comments sections. It's great shit. All right, we will see you next Tuesday or Thursday. That's right.