I've Had It - Stupid Straight People Stuff with Katya

Episode Date: September 26, 2023

Three biological women, Jennifer, Pumps and Katya, gather to discuss everything they've had it with. Katya has HAD IT with the Pope, cordless vacuums and body hair. Jennifer gets convinced to do a rather scandalous photoshoot and Pumps has had it with the disturbing twend of moms who wear matching outfits with their poor poor kids. Come see I've Had It live on the Hot Sh*t Tour! More info & tickets available at https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast Thank you to our sponsors: SimpliSafe: Get a special 20% off any SimpliSafe system when you sign up for Fast Protect Monitoring. Visit SimpliSafe.com/HADIT - There’s no safe like SimpliSafe. SKIMS: SKIMS Fits Everybody and more best-selling essentials are available now at SKIMS.com + get free shipping on orders over $75! After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.  DoorDash: Get 50% off your first DoorDash order up to a $20 value when you download the DoorDash app in the App Store use code HADIT at checkout. Limited time offer, terms apply. Rocket Money: Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions – and manage your money the easy way – by going to RocketMoney.com/HADIT. ZocDoc: Go to Zocdoc.com/IVEHADIT and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Inkey: Right now, The Inkey List is offering our listeners 20% off their purchase with promo code HADIT. Boll & Branch: Sleep better at night with Boll and Branch sheets. Get 15% off your first order when you use promo code HADIT at bollandbranch.com. Subscribe to our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/IveHadItPodcast  Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps Special Guest: Katya @katya_zamo

So we're supposed to start the podcast. One, two, three. I'll tell you what, I'll tell you what, you are my friend. You are the absolute best. But I need to know what you've had it with, Pumps. What I've had it with is a disturbing trend. I've noticed on the internet, which is a twin, a disturbing twend.

Trend, trend, which is mothers and daughters dressing alike. Now, granted, they're little girls, like little girls and moms, but it's horrible. When our kids were little, they had like, largely mom and daughter dresses. I thought it was stupid then. I think it's even worse now. I've had it with the dressing alike.

Sometimes you see like a dad in a son that 90 times out of a hundred, it's women dressing like their daughters, and I've had it. Well, you know, this is just triggered a long age-old resentment. And I've had it that I've had with you for probably around 18 years or so now. Okay. What is it? You used to put Emily, your daughter, in the stupid fucking bows that are the size of the kids head. And you had this holder and it had just all of these bows and you put the giant bow right on her head.

On her head and I do not like the little girl bow culture where the head and the bow are the same size. I think it's stupid. I think you're somewhat of a hypocrite. No, I'm not a hypocrite because what did Emily do with that bow immediately? I know, but that didn't stop you. You still put him on all the time. I still put him on, but she wouldn't do it.

She would look right at me with her evil eyes. Rip it out of her head as I was saying, don't pull it and she would rip it out and throw it at me. What you deserved immediately. Well, I don't blame her. I mean, even I wasn't wearing a bat. You're missing the point. Even two, she hated the bat. She wasn't going to tolerate. She wouldn't wearing a bat. You're missing the point. Even two, she hated the bat. She wasn't gonna tolerate.

She wouldn't. That ridiculous look. And here's what's so great about all this. It's right now there's some hate listeners. Right. That are listening to this and they're saying, they are just so negative about motherhood. Everything about being a mother is wonderful.

It's so perfect. And you know what, they get so triggered and you know who's especially gonna get triggered are the moms on Instagram and TikTok that dress. Like their daughter. Like their daughter. And then they probably browbeat their daughter off camera to learn like about four or eight counts.

Right. To put together to a little beat, then put on. Yeah. And I think, you know, what's so funny, is you don't come at us all you want to. But why aren't we coming at these moms who use their kids as a prop to game Instagram for performative purposes when their kids are never seeing these posts.

Right. Kylie just brought to our attention listener off camera. We have like a viral video. And it's about where Olivia the caller in about three or four episodes ago, maybe five or six episodes ago, I was talking about the Instagram mom culture where it's like, I'm so glad you chose me to be your mommy. Of course, baby city came out. Of course, Pams and I rip it. Kylie Katzada puts it on Instagram. And the comment section you guys is fucking gold.

It just tells me they've they actually are trying to sell that shit. It is like, well, it tells you they've posted it. What all of it tells you that's your right. All it tells you is that they posted it and some of the posts are like I love being a mother and I love my child and you guys are just vulgar and negative and horrible. I mean it's giving bully vibes. Fuck off. Here's what I have to say about that. Where's our bed? Right here. Right here. Play it. I roll goddamn city. That's what we say to you. It's hilarious. It's so good. The people that have done these things like we do have the shit that we rag on. Right. We'll just

sit here and I don't go, yeah, that was pretty stupid. So stupid. I mean, case in point was me arriving in South Africa using hashtag pinch me. Dom, stupid, idiotic. I'm not getting triggered by somebody calling me out because I myself will join you. Right. And calling me out. But these butt hurt, titty babies on Instagram that take this non deep stuff that we talk about. And they make it like it's like all we're saying is yeah, that's stupid. Those performative mother posts. And then they write like a paragraph, essay response to it, like it's some deep thing. And it's just the internet and Instagram is just not that deep.

Well, and how much they love their children and how motherhood is the most perfect thing in the whole world. And it's like, can't make some fucking slack, please. I'm calling bullshit. I'm, please. I'm calling bullshit. I'm calling bullshit. I'm calling bullshit. If you're right,

if you're right, if you're writing a paragraph in response to anything that we put on the worldwide web, you have just owned yourself as yes, so triggered and such a titty baby and an offender and an offender. Yep. And an offender. I agree with you about the matching outfits. They're stupid.

Also want to circle back to how stupid you were when you put those big bows on Emily's head full stop. Let me tell you what I've had it with. What have you had it with? Couples photos. I like the pose for their, here's the deal. If you're a couple and you're out to dinner and somebody grabs your iPhone and they take a photo, that's not what I'm ragging on.

Right. That's not it. I'm talking about your engaged or a tree anniversary or you're just a couple. Okay, and you call a photographer and you schedule a photo shoot for you and your significant other. And we've all seen the tired poses that are done. Yes.

Okay, you've got the guy standing behind you with his arms around and your arms around him and you're looking up and he's kind of looking down and it's like a cheek to cheek. And every time I see these, I cringe. I just cringe at the staged couples photos. I want a more natural looking photo, but the staged, professionally done photos of couples. Number one, I think the dorky, I think it's total gooberville. I've had it. I don't like the poses. I don't like the stupid clothes they're wearing. I don't like them at all. The engagement photos, I think they need to cancel their shoots altogether. Well, I think everything's stage for Instagram. Like, is any proposal now spontaneous? Is there any proposal now that the wife doesn't know about? Because we have to have 47 photographers,

someone videoing for Instagram, the whole family has to be there. I mean, I don't feel like there's anything private anymore. Here's the deal. Here's what I want to know. Is there, when you were engaged, did you take engagement photos? No. I would literally, I would, I do not like giving blood. I would sit and give every amount of blood that I had. And I would just say, leave me only with a bare minimum

defunction to have your engagement photos. No, it never even crossed my mind to get an engagement photo. Did you get one? No. When did this start? I think it started with Instagram. I think it's all started, like, look how great my life is. I'm engaged to this wonderful person, which, half the time, it's like, you see that great?

Is she that great? I mean, I'm glad you think so. That's important. But I don't think we need 27 posts about it. I mean, people get married every day. Let's get divorced every day. Let's go back to the cheesy, like, the way they're postured. You know what I'm talking about?

You know Kylie, right? I've been in one before. With whom? An ex. On and I haven't done them, but she did tell me last week that she booked us a photo shoot. Oh my gosh. Shut up. Yeah.

Is this where we're going to give an exemption to our clients? We're lines paused. Stop. We can't just let that slide by. Let's go back to the stage. You called somebody or got on the internet with your ex girlfriend and booked couples photos. Is that correct? I did not, but I was a victim in all of it. And how did you anticipate? I had to, yeah.

Okay, where are those photos now? I'm gonna find them for you. We gotta see those. Okay, and then what were the poses? I remember one where we were laying in the grass and someone's yard and then like my arm was around and then the head was down on my shoulder. Nothing good. Nothing other than cheeseville, USA. Yeah. Okay, but hold on, you weren't engaged, right?

No. So this was just, hey, it's Saturday? We're not even dating a year. And then Anna, just say, How are you going to handle this with Anna? I'll send them to you. I'll print them. I won't want to open your best immediately.

I'm going to make one my screensaver on my phone. Do you promise? Oh, 100% I will. You got to do better than going behind her and kind of cheek to cheek, resting your head on her shoulder kind of thing. I'm going to do that exact one now. I think you should just, I think if you're going to do it, I think you lean in and do the cheesiest poses, imaginal. I'm talking about your both on your stomach, hands,

hands and your feet up and you're both looking towards the camera. And then a kiss. I think you have to just go all in and you have to and then like do the night in the 1980s. The big thing was you would take these family photos. If you and your siblings, you need to all be positioned up a tree. Yes. Yeah. I think you should do these family photos. If you and your siblings, you need to all be positioned up a tree. Yeah. Yeah. I think you should do the tree or a staircase. Yeah, or a staircase.

Can we do matching outfits? Yes. Oh my god. Go all chips out. Here's the thing, listener. The only caveat to these is if you're going to do it, go all in. But don't own it. Don't try to act like, oops, we just took an engagement photo

and we're just caressing each other right now because everybody knows what happens when that camera goes down. Right. Everybody knows the smile immediately vanishes. Yes. And now of course, some people are truly in love. There's just something about the whole process

of you getting engaged and then there's just this parade and this drum beat of stuff that goes on. Where I just envision one of the two people kind of feeling somewhat tortured by the whole process. And maybe that's projection. Right, I would feel tortured by the process. So maybe I'm assuming everybody, perhaps it's total, say Josh and I would both feel tortured by it, which is why we've never done it. You know what used to be the biggest torture when it came to family photos was when you had to get all three of your red rats or two of your red rats together

for a photo. I mean, by the end of the day, I was on Sua's side watch. I mean, I hated them so badly. They hated me so badly. And maybe we got five or six good pictures. But Angie Motherhood is wonderful. It's so perfect. It's so wonderful. How could you ever say anything negative about your precious angels? That would be human. No, we're perfect. You have to be a separate wife, especially on the World Wide Web. Motherhood is amazing. Full stop. Family pictures with your children are so enjoyable.

Put a fucking sock in it. All right, welcome to I've had it. It's a show about motherhood and all the joys that it brings. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. She's the starboard show. Kylie. Hi.

Hi engagement photo. Yeah, engagement photo. Sasha engagement. engagement photo. She referred to herself as a victim of the first time around. She said that's honest. She said I was a victim. One could also say you were a willing participant. Semantics.

Yeah. Either way. Kylie, is there anything good? Anybody's written about us on the World Wide Web? Yeah. I mean, it's hard to choose from all the hate. But you brought up the Instagram mom. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I'm gonna read you a paragraph. Oh, good. That was left on there. Okay, good. This is from Papa Dopolis, underscore. Why do you guys keep bothering people with kids? I see all these pages of just straight bashing parents, but I don't see any of the parents bashing non-parents.

I don't see videos of people making fun of people for not having kids. Why are y'all so obsessed with people with kids? Can't celebrate our kids or highlight them because our happiness annoys you. Sorry, we're happy. Okay, here I'm just, I'm just going to take a wild stab at it. What's your name? Papa Dopolis? It's a man. Oh, it's a man. Okay, guarantee you, Papa Dopolis, there is a one month photo with the blanket. And it says one month, two months, two months,

absolutely. three month. And this is the deal, pop a Dopilus. You go down this road of where everything's gotta be fucking cupcakes and rainbows all the time. And somewhere along, it's just like a, you know, like all of this pressure. It's like a pressure cooker.

Pressure cooker. All of a sudden, pop a Dopilus is gonna fucking pop at some point. And it's not going to be pretty. No, we tried to warn you here. Get shit off your chest as you live, live, right? Experience joy, experience irritation, get it off your chest and move on. I've got one more. Okay. From Bubby 28. And she writes, are y'all miserable? Do you need to be raw dogged? That's a pretty good one.

That's a pretty good one. I like that. I like that. That was pretty good. I mean, you know, here's the deal. We could get raw dogged 25 times a day, Bubby. And I'm still gonna kind of have it with the performative mothering on Instagram.

I think it's bullshit. I think defending it is indefensible. And I think if that's what you do, like here's what we do, we get on the internet, we bash shit, people criticize us, and we just take it. Right, we find it. We fucking take it It's totally fine. So if your thing is I'm gonna get on and I'm gonna talk about my kids all the time

And how perfect my other head is just remember that there are some others out there that are struggling with the Fresh in abuse of husbands As whole kids. There's a whole plethora of shit and all we're saying is we love our kids and motherhood has been There's a whole plethora of shit. And all we're saying is we love our kids and motherhood has been awesome for us, but at the same time, we would be remiss if we didn't tell people it's fucking hard and sometimes you want to pull your pubic hair out

by the root one by one. Yes, absolutely, that is perfect summation of it. But there's no question, pops in these two little dots. I knew you were gonna say that. There's no question, pumps, and these things. I knew you were going to say that. There's no doubt about that. But listen, let's just talk about how great our little diamond looks. She bears with me so bad.

Why? You look so good. Everybody's talking about it on YouTube. Thank you. Everybody's talking about, oh my God, pumps is so hot. It makes me happy because you are. Thank you. And you look so pretty.

Thank you. So anyway, yeah, I embarrass you because you are. Thank you. And you look so pretty. Thank you. So anyway, yeah, I embarrass you when I'm nice to you. I know, I'm saying I far prefer it when you're me. You like it better when I'm probably you. It feels more comfortable. All right. All right, listen up. Listener, it's a big day.

It's a great day. It's a big day for big tits, pumps. It is. I'm excited. Speaking of big tits, yep, we got a big titty drag queen coming on. Big one of the biggest. One of the biggest teller, tellin' Pumps who's coming on. Katya! That's right.

I mean, Katya is coming on. Let's get her on here. Pumps, I feel like I have all of these subscriptions on my phone. It has to my credit card that are just auto renewing. I have no idea where to start to find them or how to clean it out. Same problem. I have several subscriptions to the same sites oftentimes.

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Bonjour. Kaka, how are you? I'm good now. Well, good. I'm so happy to be here. I, uh, you guys are the everything. Oh, that's so sweet. I would just notice that you have the most gorgeous eyes.

Oh, thank you. I was just in a fight with somebody about what color they actually are. I think they're green, but people say they're blue. I, I say green, but thank you. Okay. Good. So somebody was fighting with you about your very own eye color. Yeah. Isn't that crazy? We were just talking about how crazy people were before you came on here, So somebody was fighting with you about your very own eye color. Yeah, it's not crazy.

We were just talking about how crazy people were before you came on here, like particularly the toxic positivity crowd, you know, we're fucking had titty babies. I've had it with these titty babies that everything has positive positive posism. One thing makes them uncomfortable. It is a stage five meltdown. We're in the exude all this rage. And it's like, how dare you fucking cut not be positive. Had it. I've had it. I've had it. Usually I find that when people use the word

toxic, it can that tends to be a red flag about their own toxicity. I had to percent agree. Yes. Yes. Oh my god. Well, Cod, yet we we have a you know formula here. We want to be cynical about as many things as possible during this hour broadcast. So the we go out into the world, we've gotten it off our chest and we can be positive and tolerant of other people's dysfunction. And so what we like to do right out of the gates is we want you to tell us what you've had it with. Okay. Well, first of all, I think that your mission statement as you just described is so healthy, that your mission statement as you just described, it's so healthy, it's so fabulous.

It's so necessary. So, the main thing I've had it with is it's a toss up between body hair and wealth hoarding. I had it with the body hair. Okay, body hair, body hair. So, I'm a drag queen, right? And I have to shave my face in order to do my job, which is to put on makeup to transform

to look like a woman, you know. And it's just like, it's a sycety in a battle, you know, like I have a lumberjack beard that grows in a matter of like hours. So like it's a race against the clock to shoot like the clock? As soon as I shave and put the makeup on, it's like there's a, you know, one of those doomsday clocks ticket and the beard is coming in and I'm like, I fucking had it because I'm not going to get a liqueur. I'll say, I'm not going to get laser because I actually want to keep a beard

for when I'm not, you know, doing drag, which is quite frequent. And so like it just, I've had it in the time spent, doing drag, which is quite frequent. And it's so like, it just, I've had it. In the time spent, the pain, the money, I mean, the people who shaved their legs every other day or every day know it. It's like, yeah, it's so crazy. It's so crazy. Here's what I'm wondering about. How do you feel about men's back hair? I fucking had it. It's so gross. I'm hatter. It's so gross. I've actually had it with underarm hair on both men and women or everything in between. No.

I don't like back hair. I don't like armp hair. I don't like hair on the toes. I don't like hair on the knuckles. I don't like hair on the neck. I don't like hair. I mean, pretty much like head, eyebrow, you know, some kind of beardish, whatever.

And then I'm good. Okay. A few episodes ago, pumps just found out for the very first time we were discussing bleaching assholes as responsible middle-aged women often do discuss. Right. She thought, Katya, she thought until like literally this episode that when when I said bleaching assholes, she thought that they were bleaching the hair. Bleaching the hair. No idea. People bleach their apples.

She had no idea about the skin. You would be surprised. I mean, I wouldn't, I don't think it's totally unusual that she thought that because I mean, there's people doing a lot of weird stuff to the assholes especially in Los Angeles. What okay so do you can you shed some light like so Kylie said she thinks her working theory is that your asshole starts off pink and then you shit and then you get a shit stained asshole where it's kind of brownish like he's like you don't think that's a good working theory. like he's like, you don't take that to good working theory. Because if you're if you're if you're hygiene is that such a such a a measly state that you're not getting the shit off the top layer of

your fucking skin, which leads me to back to the hair, shave your mother fucking asshole. Yeah, shave your mother fucking asshole. Why would people bleach it when they could just shave it off? Why go through all the trouble? It's not about vanity, it's about hygiene, comfort, and decency, you know? It's about like dignity. Exactly, totally agree.

I wasn't like not long ago, and this guy, he was pretty cute, and we were all on the boat. We were like, yeah, he's pretty cute, did it. He turned around and I swear to God, it was gorilla fur at the back of his back. Oh, sure. Oh, yeah, yeah. I mean, we were just like, yeah, he's pretty cute. Dada, he turned around and I swear to God, it was gorilla fur at the back of his back. Oh, yeah, yeah. And we were both, I mean, we were just like, I mean, it was so shocking and we couldn't,

I mean, it was like, he's a gagger now. I mean, just so gross. I just, I do not like back hair on a man or a woman, obviously. Well, no, on a woman, it's great. But, you know, in the gay world, the trends have sort of loosened and kind of diverged so that people with a lot of hair can be appreciated. You know what I mean?

Like, because for the longest time, it was like the chiseled, hairless, doneness. Right. You know, that was the ideal. But now there's no like, there's no one ideal in the gay world, which is great. That is so. However, I like, just in general, generally speaking just in general speaking, if it's hammer time when you're asked, hair wise, it's going to be nasty. You have to wash and scrub so fiercely after you take a shit.

Anyway, worth it. It's not worth it. Okay. Here's what I just have a follow-up question. I'm back to the bleaching of the asshole. I worth it. Okay. So here's what I just have a follow up question. I'm back to the bleaching of the asshole. Have I? I'm sorry. Have you ever bleached your asshole? No, because I've never done porn. Here's the deal. Caught you. I have no idea what my asshole looks like. And not so bad. Do you know what your asshole looks like? Unfortunately, I do. And, you know, I'm just saying she's not going to be on the cover of

both. She's not maybe on the cover of both anytime soon. But it was so shocking. I mean, not bad, but it was just like, I've never seen my asshole from that view as if I were, you know, and it was just your asshole for the first time recently. 41 years old. I'm 49. And I'm thinking about doing a photo shoot later tonight, but I don't know if I should or not. I mean, I kind of want to know what it looks like,

but then again, I can't do it. You go to the mall. You go to the mall. They have a nice little setup. You know, they have the soft lighting and the background. Another follow up question. When you saw the image of your asshole, did you think I should get into bleaching or where you just kind of like, what were the follow up thoughts? I was like, shock. It was like the stages of when you lose a loved one, you know, it's like,

you're shocked. And then it's like, you're, yeah, you're shocked. And then it's like, I think I reached the acceptance phase pretty quickly. And then I just noticed there was a pimple and I was like, mother. You know, it's just, I was like, I gotta go get some kids by Jenny, the spray tan lady down the street. Okay. So you had a bunch of like great random shit on your list that you And I made the more I made more I just want to dive into the nuance of a few of these okay, and I just want to see why you've got such a bean your bonnet about cordless vacuum cleaners

Because they don't fucking work. They don't fucking work. They don't fucking work. They don't. I'm sorry. Listen, this is a hill that I will die on. I grew up with the plug of the cord. You got the bag. That's how I grew up with the back and cleaner. And then the dice and came along. And these other ones with the, they're of course, they don't suck up anything. I agree. They don't suck up anything. I went to the store and got a one of these, uh, it was like fucking $800 or I, it was $800 fucking dollars. But she sucked up my furniture. Like, it was crazy. Like it, the rug came, it was just wild. It works. And it's, but, you know, the, you got to just, you got to deal with the cord. Yeah. Because I hate those cordless vacuums. They don't pick up anything. I've got two cordless vacuums and both of them sucked.

And the battery, if you put it on turbo, it lasts about 30 seconds. Yeah. And I'm going to say this with the cord. I'm going to say you can kind of get your right hand if you're right handed like I am and get the cord. Yeah. You can kind of hold it out and you can vacuum to eight counts. You can five, six, seven, eight, seven, eight, eight, and boom, and boom, yeah. It prints that courting. Production. Yes, you can totally get into it.

Make it a little dance. You can work the court. You can flip it around like a job. There's just a lot of ways that you can work the court. I have total. Get the local kids in the neighborhood involved, you know? It's a lot of people. Underground basically.

It's vacuuming. It's like you have to enjoy it. It's vacuuming. It's like you have to enjoy it. I love vacuuming. I love it. It's really satisfying. Okay. Here's another one. And I totally agree with you on this.

Flowers as gifts. Hate. I hate. So I appreciate the sentiment always. Somebody's thinking about you. But let's take. I'm sick I broke my leg I'm in a hospital do you think I want to fucking vase of flowers in

my little room do you think I want a vase of flowers what the fuck is that gonna do to me like how is that gonna make me feel better you just spend $75 or $150 having somebody to you know deliver a bouquet of flowers. Give me like a cigarette bar or something else. Like they just, it's there and then they die and then they smell like shit and they gotta get rid of them. That's my problem.

Is you get something and I immediately start anticipating it's death. I do too. Yes! It's useless. It's useless. Totally. My birthday was a couple months ago and I got all of these flowers.

My desk was full of all of these flowers and I inherently thought because I have been indoctrinated that I'm supposed to like flowers and I stand against this indoctrination. I think we should all stand against it because people are giving us a gift that is dying, that has been murdered, taken out of a central habitat, dressed up. And then the next thing you know, that mother feckers dead. And then really, we're all been indoctrinated to believe that this is a good gift. And we're calling it right here. I don't like it. The flower racket needs to end. Got it. And had it. And the thing is that water

starts stinking too. After about 10, it's horrible. The smell of dead roses, I would rather sniff the shitty hairy asshole of a dead body. I would go rather, and also I have a good friend of mine as a full person, and I just hired him to send Tricy flowers, and she loves flowers. Oh, shit. She loves flowers, loves flowers.

But imagine this, instead of all those flowers you got for your birthday, what if they were the equivalent in dollar bills? That's what I want. That's what I want. You know what, I'd rather have, you know what, I'd rather have euros. Yeah, we're stuck.

The dollar, give me euros. Canadian quarters, anything. Totally. I'm international baby. I want fucking euros. Isn't it funny? They're said people love getting flowers. It makes them feel so loved. But I remember when I was married, I would be like, do not send me $150 worth of flowers. I don't want to. I'll go buy what I want. It's in doctoration. It's everybody's talking about indoctrination, but they're not talking about

the right stuff. We've all been indoctrinating. We're talking about grooming. Yeah, we need to talk about indoctrinated to love flowers. We're supposed to love them. It's supposed to be the nicest thing. Here's the deal. It's not that creative of a gift. All you do is call somebody else arranges them and delivers them. Thank you. We're not doing jacks yet. And then you're sending somebody a gift that's dying. And everybody's been indoctrinated that we're all supposed to love flowers. And you know what? For a long time, I felt prey to this indoctrination.

But I've been enlightened and I have woken up and it stops here. No more flowers, you J.D. Yeah, you've finally smelled the roses and it smells like... LAUGHTER you've finally smelled the roses and it smells like... LAUGHTER LAUGHTER

OK, I read some articles about you. And you have... We like to talk... We like to talk about all this petty shit because we're petty salty bitches. There's no question about it. But we also have a side where we really take, you know, our politics very seriously

and we see them as moral issues and not necessarily political. And you had a really good statement that you made about all of these morons that are obsessed with drag queens right now. And it was something like stupid people making stupid laws about drag queens. And I think that is so simple.

Well said. Yeah, I mean, I just, it's truly puzzling and I think like there's this like such a such a bizarre combination of of stupidity and ambition with these people. Yes. They're so fucking stupid, but they're so fucking motivated. Totally. For like a liberal person, it's kind of hard to understand. I always equated like stupidity or ignorance with like laziness in action. Laziness, right. But these people are fully motivated by the Bible or whatever. Yeah. And never having read a damn page of it. And even then it's like, okay,

okay, whatever. It's just, it's really, it's shocking and it's, I guess it's not shocking, but it's sad and it's stupid. and it's, I guess it's not shocking, but it's sad, and it's stupid, and I think it's more stupid than sad. I think it's more stupid than sad too. I think it's like you have, they want to unify, they don't want to talk about guns, because that's a multi-billion dollar industry. They don't want to talk about the environment

and the fact that we just had the hottest summer ever, and next year we'll probably be even hotter hotter because there's billions of dollars behind fossil fuels. And they don't want to talk about, you know, certain, they don't want to talk about women's bodies because by God, we're supposed to submit. We live in an abortion being a state, right? Now, that's where I don't understand. So like the, the, the, the absolutely bloodthirsty capitalism I understand, you know,

the not wanting to think about a hundred years from now and focus on making profits today, I understand. But the women's bodies thing, the more the the sexuality morality thing, I don't tell you why. Okay, so I wasn't raised with religion at all. So I was zero indoctrinated. My parents were atheists. Okay, but I lived and grew up in the Bible belt. And these people that are raised and indoctrinated, that's where the indoctrination is. They're indoctrinated in this right wing form of Christianity. And the number one thing that they shame is sex.

Because it's the one thing that can't control. It's a control thing because the one thing that religion picked to shame is the one thing that we're genetically encoded to do. Like, at a friend whose kids went to a Bible Thumper private school and they told the kids at the school, if you masturbate, tell teenage boys this, if you masturbate, that is from the devil.

How fucking stupid is that to tell a teenager when we're not to beat off? I mean, I've got to be so dumb. Yeah, I grew up Catholic and it's funny, as my main I've had it, I was gonna write the poll. The poll. Because for the reason you're just described as that, Catholicism in particular, they turn

you against your body. To be naked is to be ashamed. And it's locked up. And they talk about indoctrination. They have a chokehold on the, you know, protterning people against themselves and making the machine to them, whatever, whatever. And we all know that priests, I mean, the worst defenders. All the worst defenders. I have a friend in Italy who's like, you would, you would die if you knew about the hooker activity at the Vatican. LAUGHTER

Like, you have no, as you have no idea. And it's probably about genders. I mean, you know, it's probable. What's all men? It's all men. But here's the deal. That's better than the fucking kids. Yeah, you know. Well, they're, yeah, they're fucking kids at the Vatican too.

Yeah, it's so sad. They're nasty. Crazy. It's crazy. And they didn't have to be like this. But before Christianity, I mean, you know, 1000 years ago, where they were like, you know, where wasn't so male centric and like male dominated, It's like, God, it's a bummer.

We probably won't get back there, but yeah, you know, think of one thing I will give to the Catholics is that they did St. Peter's Bisturica is off the hook. The architecture is the architecture and the art is fabulous. The kid fucking, not don't love that. That's so great. No, the Catholics, the architecture A plus, the stained glass A plus, the mega churches F. Totally. Architecture is terrible.

Moot, moot, amphitheater. It is absolutely tragic architecture. I don't know how people- You're going to church, you're going to see the wiggles? It's like, the art day. Yeah, fuck Joel Oxtean. I've had it with that motherfucker. Oh my God.

Same. Same. Pumps, there is nothing worse in the morning than waking up, imagining that coffee hitting my mouth. I mean, I'm literally salivating like Pavlov's dog, walked to the coffee maker to make said cup of coffee. And then I realized, I forgot to buy coffee. The only thing worse than that happening is realizing you have to go to the store to get the coffee. Well, you know, I order a lot of my dinner from DoorDash

because I'm not a cook. And now DoorDash, who I trust to deliver dinner to my family, is now delivering groceries. So listener, if you find yourself in a coffee bind in the morning, you can now go into your app and order that coffee and haven't made and you're right out the door. Listener, get 50% off your first DoorDash order up to a $25 value when you use code hat it at checkout. Limited time offer terms apply. That's 50% off up to $20 no minimum sub total and zero delivery fees on your first order when you download the door dash app in the App Store

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the Inky List is offering 20% off their purchase with promo code had it. Go to the Inkylist.com and that is spelled I N K E Y and be sure to use the promo code had it for 20% off your order. That's the Inkylist.com and be sure to use the promo code had it. You know, Pumps, I feel like you're always on the hunt for the perfect doctor. Always. A doctor who actually gets you, listens to you, and makes you feel super comfortable. Fortunately, for you, I've discovered Zock Doc. Zock Doc is a free app where you can find amazing doctors and book appointments online.

We're talking about booking appointments with thousands of top-rated patient-reviewed doctors and specialists. You can filter specifically for ones who take your insurance or are located near you and treat almost any condition you're searching for. Go to zok.com slash I've had it and download the zokock app for free, then find and book a top rated doctor today. That's zo c d o c dot com slash I've had it. Zock dot dot com slash I've had it. Okay, Katia, we're going to play a game with you called had it or hit it. Oh my God, welcome to Hadid or Hit It. I would hit it, Hadid. I hit it every day sometimes twice a day.

All right, Hadid or Hit It thin-skinned people. I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say Hit It because I have become hardened over incinical over time. But I have recently realized that I'm also, I'm like, one not bizarrely, but I'm kind of thin skinned myself and sensitive. So I'm gonna say hit it because I don't know.

I know I'm not a sensitive snowflake, but. I like sensitive people. Yeah, and that you're sensitive. Yeah, sometimes it's like, although we can be like, I appreciate directness and all that stuff and like people who have or Disciase it and don't you know be around the bush sometimes it's like grow on the bitch We've been accused of that a time or two Well the first the first episode I when I found you guys months ago

I was like I think that you did describe you're like, toddlers are asshole. They are. They are. They are. But they are. They are. They totally are.

I mean, it's just we approach life. I mean, of course, we've gotten older now too. Pemps is significantly older than Man and Chir That's not about significant. That's neither here nor there, but I'm sure he gets reach outs from the ARP. I have not for the permanent record. But we've had toddlers and it's just we have found that when you try to live this life and this veneer for everybody else, it's not sustainable. And we know people that try to do that. And then the divorce and the relashes and everything

happened in spectacular fashion. Yeah, it's just, it's not sustainable. OK. Had it or hit it, professional engagement photos, couples photos. Oh, I have had it. Thank you. I had it. Thank you.

Because let me tell you something. It's like the flower thing. Why don't you take that money and shovel it into a furnace? Because that would be a better use of that cash. Because you're going to hire some amazing photographer, find some overpriced location, get dressed up, and some stupid outfit, and they're going to break up. Or you're not going to get divorced. It's all gonna mean jack shit. Let's talk about poses and the posturing.

Oh, it's just like just make a porno. You can stay that because that will endure. You know what I mean? Like that will be like something useful for the rest of your life. But you know, you break up. You keep it in the vault. You watch it every once in a while. Like, I remember Jim remember Claire. Yeah, you break up, you keep it in the vault. You watch it every once in a while. Like, I don't remember Jim, remember Claire.

Yeah, you're like, make a porno. Just I've had it with that. So it's stupid straight people stuff. Totally agree. Not all straight people because our precious guy. The gay one. Our producer is a lesbian. And she just announced that she and her ex did a lesbian photos shoot. Well, lesbians are exempt. We just we just

recently modified we have this book here called the permanent record. And it starts off with things that we write down, like the first one is that pumps is not a good pet owner. The other one dog. And another one is like, like, you should never sit on the same side of the booth. And we browbeat couples that sit on the same side of the booth. We recently made a caveat and to exclude homosexuals. Right.

Homosexuals are allowed to sit on the same side of the booth. But if you're heterosexual and you're sitting on the same side of the booth, get the fuck out. Get the fuck out of there. Yeah, because ladies need to think or bang each other and guys need to jerk each other off. and you're sitting on the same side of the booth. Get the fuck out. Get the fuck out of there. Yeah, because ladies need to finger bang each other and guys need to jerk each other off. That's the way it is.

Okay, had it, had it, or hit it, Taylor Swift. Okay, so if you would ask me this maybe a month ago, I would have said I've had it, but I read that article, that piece about the guy in jail, who, I think it's the New Yorker or the New York Times about this, a guy in jail who listened to, who basically his love of Taylor Swift, like it may cry. And I've like observed the chokehold that she has on the public consciousness. The fact that she sold out fixer seven nights at Sophie Stadium in Los Angeles, like 80, 80, 90,000 people a night or something.

Yeah, I'm like, I don't, I don't, I don't listen to her music, but I'm like, Yeah, I'm a hit it. And I guess she's a very good songwriter. It's not, I listen to fucking shitty Russian pop music, so I'm not a big play. You know, I'm not, I don't know. But she's incredible. She's incredible. All right, had it or hit it red next?

Oh, I, I'd hit it because I myself, I'm a red net like literally, or so pale, I always put on sunscreen, and I, I don't know. I think like, I think it's some, I know some like hillbilly type people who are not ignorant, but they're just like, they're, and they're not,

you know, red state, and mega bible thumpers. There's just a little country, you know? I'm kind of red neck. A little bit. Yeah, yeah. Humps is a little bit of a red neck. Yeah, in older.

Yeah, I know that people are like, hey, I'm just a little bit of a redneck. Yeah, an older. Yeah, I know that he like hey y'all I probably am kind of a redneck too. Okay, last one. Had it or hit it posting the outfit of the day I've had it with the phone. I've had it with social media. I've had it with like I've had it. I'm married. I've had it with the phone. I've had it with social media. I've had it with like, I've had it with fit, abbreviating outfit to fit. Like, was that too long of a word? Too long of a word to say?

Yeah. Nice fit. What? Nice outfit, bitch. Like, I don't, this is like, I can't, I don't know. I'm maybe I'm old and crotchety, but I don't look great on my fits, but yeah, I don't I just like I can't I don't know I'm maybe I'm old and crotchety but I don't look great on my fits but I don't I had it I with you where we just railed on mothers that do the school drop off outfit of the day have you seen this

crazy town oh wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait is it the child or they're outfit the mother the mother yet a life Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, culture is horrible. Oh, see, we got to get off the phone. We got to get off the phone down. Put yourself on a social media break. You know, it's not when you're outfitting the day your school drop off look. That's your. Yeah. Like, listen, I, you know, I've had it with the phone in general and I wish we could go back to the TV remote control was the TV remote control. The telephone was the telephone. And then the, you know, like, I don't want to, and then the car in the car or the music player, like, I don't want the phone to be controlling everything in my life. Okay. Because that slippery fucking iPhone, this is the second case I've cracked.

It's driving me bananas. I wish we could go back to kind of like, you know, it's clunky, but it's just not living with that damn owner. A little separation, just a little separation. I agree. Yeah, it was great when we grew up because like, we just, you just couldn't call your parents, they couldn't call you, you had to come home. Sometime before dark, which was rather ambiguous, you know?

Right. Yeah. You know, that was about an hour window that you could really push it. It was glorious. And how can nowadays, can you even conceive of like, how did we make plans and then follow through with them? Right. I know. Like, you know what I mean? Like, like, meet me at the orange Julius in the mall.

It's six. Right. And then you just did. Right. You just waited there until everybody got there. Yeah. Yeah. And you just did. You remembered it. I didn't have to write it down or like, you know, I just had a vision. You know, it would be a great Halloween costume. Right when you said orange Julius, I just remembered hot dog on a stick. Yeah. The primary colors and the hot dog on the stick. people wore those hats. Yeah, it's like red blue and green

Did you ever see that? Kaccia no, no, not tantalizing. Oh, it's fabulous. That's what we need to be for Halloween. We'll make Kylie be a hot dog on a stick to you. Yep Kaccia, I mean this is so fun. I could talk to you all for hours You ladies are so awesome and the best compliment I've ever received is when I discovered y'all it was because a fan had said this is the The female version of Trixie and Kati. I was like that is the highest compliment. I've ever received. Oh my gosh When Trixie told us that we were like, oh my gosh, that is the highest compliment. Yeah You guys are you make me howl howl and I love that you hate kids Fuck kids fuck flowers fuck the eye

This has been thank you lady so much. Thank for having me you guys are the best you two by Love you just took a huge hit off your vape. Listen, she's trying so hard. You had to exhale. I totally best, I can totally see it coming out. Can you see it now? No, but I saw like a big white pocket of vape in your mouth. Did you?

Yeah. So you thought you'd best me out? Let me ask you this. In an average episode, how many times do you sneak a vape? None. Not in bullshit. We have it on YouTube. Maybe one or two, like when it was somebody else's podcast, but hardly ever ours because they're all recorded.

Is that true? That is a lie. I try really hard. All face lie. You definitely hate your vape during episodes. I think I don't even know it. Then I don't know it. Because I'm very, I try to be really, I don't have a problem with it.

No, I know, but I do try to be on the slide a little bit. All right, let's get back to Kaccia. The best, love, so fun. So fun. Like I want to like have a slumber party with Trixine Kaccia, but then we all go to our own beds, but like have like joining hotel rooms. Makes more. No.

No, that sounds too ambitious. I'm talking like a four seasons, like they would rooms. Makes more. No, that sounds too ambitious. I'm talking like a four seasons, like they would bring us this more. Yeah, we fluff around. Yeah, the fun is talk. Yeah, it'd be really fun. I love their podcast. I love their live show.

I haven't seen the live show in person, but I've seen bits of it and it's fantastic. They're amazing. But sometimes you have like when you're holding in your vape, you have that little. I blew out the smoke five minutes ago. She's the one obsessed with it. Sometimes you have like when you're holding in your vape, you have that little, I blew out the smoke five minutes ago. She's the one obsessed with that. Can you hear it in her voice?

A little croak. Yeah, the little smoker croak. It's on a smoker croak. It is. All right, well anyway, I think it's a huge hit. We love Katya. Lever. I mean, we're hot shit if we've got Katya on.

Totally, and I love drag queens. I love drag queens. I want to have as many drag queens on as possible. I do too. Because the more they, the mean people, so they don't like drag queens, the more I want to have on. Yep, that's exactly right.

Rebels. Totally. Okay. Go to Patreon, subscribe. Hot shit too. We're send us a voice memo via Instagram and PumpsT's tone. We will see you next Tuesday or Thursday or post. Two sisters, one a respected TV producer, the other was disabled, nearly blind and deaf. Jill and Wendy Blackstone lived together, rescued dogs together.

Jill was her best friend, her sister, her everything. But the sister bond was broken. The day Wendy and three rescue dogs were found dead in a garage next to a toppled over barbecue girl. Jill said accidental carbon monoxide poisoning killed her sister and the dogs. Detectives don't believe her. Police arrested Jill Blackstone for the poisoning killed her sister in the dogs. Detectives don't believe her.

Police arrested Jill Blackstone for the murder of her sister. Investigators think it was staged to look like an accident. So what happened? A source has come forward with evidence never made public before revealing the dark story of why Wendy Blackstone really died. Jill was a good producer. There's no doubt about that.

But would she produce murder? Is the question. Season two of Bad Bad Thing, The Blackstone Sisters, available October 4th, wherever you get your podcasts.