I've Had It - The Couple Doth Post Too Much

Episode Date: September 8, 2026

It's a thin line between psychotic and romantic. Pre-order Jennifer’s new book Not Today, Fascists, join our Substack, shop our merch, and more by clicking here: https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast. Thank you to our sponsors: Flamingo: Our listeners get the Flamingo Starter Set for just $7 at ⁠https://www.shopflamingo.com/HADIT⁠ Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch—get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at ⁠https://bollandbranch.com/hadit⁠ with code hadit. Exclusions apply. Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @MizzWelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps Kiley Josey: @kileyjosey Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

So are we supposed to start the podcast? Ready, one, two, three. Patriots, Gaytriots, Thetriots, Black Trots, Brown Triots, everybody who hates fascists, everybody who's fighting for this country, we love you. All of the triple Trumpers, how embarrassing that you would still be that can do what, Pumps? Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay. So this is that I've had it, but I'm also fucking hit it all day long.

Okay. Okay, so we've long been whistleblowing on this podcast of the married couples that post about one another in these just glowing terms. It's just like the magical life that we live. The love I never knew could be. It's amazing. You know, I wasn't a complete person until I saw you. I mean, just all that crazy shit. So I've had it with all that.

But at the same time, I was reminded last night that I was. that I fucking love that shit. So I had a friend that we were sending around this post in a, what we all know is disaster behind the scenes. But this glowing just, I mean, there are not words enough to describe the fantasy that I am living with this person, going back and forth between the spouses. And I fucking loved it.

I mean, I loved it. So it's, I've had it with all the glowing horse shit. get married couples on there raving about how great they are. But at the same time, I sure do you love it when somebody sends it to me. Oh, it's great shit. I mean, it's, I, but you know, I told you many years ago when I first, when social media became a thing, I would notice these couples communicating online in a performative manner when they're in the same house together. And I sent one of these to you. And I called you and I said, divorce countdown starts now. You did. It's not normal. Like if Josh

were posting, if we're sitting on the sofa together, he's like, I love Mama so much. She's just, you know, blah, blah, blah. I look, I remember, what the fuck are you doing? I'm sitting right here. You know, it's kind of like when you, but it is good shit. So do you

think this couple, how long do you give the marriage? Okay, so here's the thing. Both of them fuck around and so I don't know that I think they'll open marriage. No, it's everybody's on the down low fucking around. But then they catch each other and then they reconcile.

I'm sure there's a wedding valve renewal in here somewhere. But I just, I don't know that I think they'll divorce because I think it's so toxic. That's just how they do. But, I mean, my immediate thought when I got this post was, oh, somebody just got caught fucking around again because now we're out there. 100%. Going on social media. But, okay, just to confirm what you said, when Facebook was just like brand, brand brand new. I mean, it was the first year of Facebook. You whistle blue on this.

You said, watch this. Watch this couple. And so I started watching and I'll be damned if in within one year the wheels came off. The truth came out. Divorce exploding. Like so you have been on this since before there was ever social media but but Facebook. It's just it's so obvious that it when people are too performative about something online and it's trying to like paint this idealic thing of motherhood of marriage of friendship you know that behind the scenes that's just not the way it is humans are messy relationships are messy motherhood is messy and that's really that's the part of it that we all need to embrace a little bit more so that people understand like it's okay some days you're going to wake up and go my husband

husband is driving me fucking crazy. Doesn't mean you hate him. It doesn't mean you don't love him. It's just hard to share shit with people. A house, a life. A bathroom. It's hard. A bathroom, a closet, a bed.

And then kids are annoying. I mean, they can be super, super annoying sometime. And I just think all of this performative shit that goes on online, as delicious as it is, is a red flag that start the clock. But meltdown is imminent. I mean, it is coming. Yeah. I love it. All right.

I'm going to have to, for my grievance, I'm going to have to resurrect something. I've been traveling quite a bit lately. So I've been in airport bathrooms quite a bit. And we just need to do a general check-in with the American public surrounding bathroom etiquette. And if you were going into a bathroom to pee, poop, poop, whatever. You need to leave that stall better than how you found it. You don't just get to throw toilet paper on the floor. You don't get to take a dump and not flush it. You don't get to just, if you're a hover and you don't want your legs to touch the toilet and there's some TT that gets on

the lid, you get a toilet paper, you wipe that thing down and you leave it in a respectful manner for the next person. We've been on this for four years now. I have not seen any improvement whatsoever, which brings me to the fact that the robots are coming for all the jobs and all the wages, which is why I think airports need to start having bathroom supervisors. Not bathroom attendants that have to clean up after messy. Right. Because that's bullshit because the person who left the mess is capable of cleaning up the mess. I'm talking about a bathroom monitor that when you get out of the bathroom, your show an image of how you left the stall to the person.

And there's like a carousel thing that you have to walk through to get out. And for example, if I had this job, I would simply say, what's that down there on the floor? A tampon wrapper? Did you leave that? No, it was there when I walked in. Well, that's not how this works. You get a piece of tissue so that you don't get those. germs, pick up the wrapper, stick it in the toilet, give everything a wipe down. Back to the stall,

you go, get it ready for the next person. We're going to have to start publicly shaming people and realize that these public restrooms are just, somebody has to come in there and clean it up. Right. And it's so disrespectful to the people that have to go in there and clean it. That, I mean, that's really hard work. Those people that clean up restrooms work a lot harder, harder than Donald Trump. Donald Trump has had over 100 days of paid vacation just this second term alone. And then he's lecturing everybody about, I want to do away with Labor Day, everybody needs to work more. And his fat ass isn't working at all. These bathroom attendance, janitors work a lot harder than Howard Letnik, Elon Musk, Bill Ackman, Mark Zuckerberg, especially Donald Trump,

dumb and dumber, his sons, just get all of these, you know, Daddy, will you please sign this contract for these drones that we're investing. And sure, no problem, dumb, dumber. Just don't hang out with me is all he says. I just think it's so disrespectful to leave the restroom like that. I've had it. I've completely had it. It's really devastating to see how just gross people are in public, especially in a restroom. It's full of germs. Yeah, no, I think you're so right. And you know what one of my biggest defenses is, I mean, obviously, when you wash your hands and you spray things everywhere in the soap runs and you just don't wipe off your area. That's annoying. But this is my number one pet peeve in a public bathroom. Most of the public bathrooms, especially in an airport,

are automatic flush. So they automatically flush. You need to stand there and make sure your stuff goes down. The automatic flush might need help because I was like running in. I had to go so bad. And I ran in to the stall and there were just a couple poops. Like you could tell the first, The first one went down, but there were some stragglers. And I had to go so bad, I was like, I had to pee. And I normally would sit there and just push it again. All you have to do is just look, just survey the area, especially if you poop. Just make sure it goes down.

I mean, we're not asking for a lot. Just make sure that nobody else has to see your poop. I just, so I just hate that people depend so much on the automatic flush and that they just don't oversee to make sure everything goes down, even if it's just toilet paper. It's really stunning that people have just like shameless shits, you know? I mean, because I, we need to bring back shame to shits. Like, I don't, that's for my eyes only. The fact that these people are shit exhibitionists is a really twisted thing.

To just leave there, that's a really kinky, weird, shit, dark thing that you want to be a shit exhibitionist because that's all it is, because I've seen it in manual flushing toilets. multiple times. Oh, yeah. This is not just exclusive to auto flushers. And I think that this is something that nobody's talked about. Congress sure as hell hasn't, but the shit exhibitionists that live among us are a massive problem. Yeah. And the thing is, it's like, it's not like it's hiding. It's not like it came back up. Like, you're making a choice. I'm just going to leave this floater in here. I'm just going to leave it. They're exhibitionists. Really fucked up shit. Fucked up. Pun intended. All right, listener. I don't know about.

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time. Listener, upgrade your sleep with bowl and branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at bowl and branch.com slash had it with the code had it. That's bowl and branch, B-O-L-L-A-N-D branch.com slash had it. Code had it to unlock 15% off exclusions apply. Okay, welcome to I've had it. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. Kylie. Hi. I've got a review for you today. It's five stars Mental Health Help for Mental Health Practitioners. Those of us working the front lines with struggling human beings. We appreciate all of you. You bring joy, humor, intelligence, and fabulous vocabulary enrichment. You make my ride home from work, the brain break that I need. Love, love, love hearing you all crack up. Makes me smile. Keep going. Can't wait for Jen's

book. That's so nice. Mental health practitioners. You know they are working overtime right now. That would be a tough. It would be tough right now to be a mental health practitioner. It really would. Yeah, I don't think there's any question about it. Are anybody else, Kylie? That's it. All right. I want to talk about conservative men briefly. We know that every time I hear conservative men talk, all I hear is fear.

All they talk about is how they're scared of things. Scared of drag queens. They're scared of socialism. They're scared of liberal white women. They're scared of books and on and on and on. I mean, it's just the pussy parade. that these maga men have nonstop 24-7 on the internet is pathetic. Well, now they are mad at AOC, not for the reasons you would think,

but because she doesn't want to date them. Let's play the clip. Would you ever date a conservative? Is that anything you'd ever entertain? I have to say it's probably not. Directs the aisle? No, you know, it's not to, you know, no foul to people who do, but, but I think, and of course how you define that is very different person to person, right? But I think a lot of politics sometimes, at least for me, is about values and being aligned with, in values, I think is tremendously important.

So she's so good at that, you know. I mean, what, AOC really gets under their skin because she's a really skilled, relatable politician. So that's TMZ following her. And she's just talking the way we all talk. And I thought that was just such a good, the values. I like to date people whose values align with mine. Well, as you can imagine, Fox News is desperately trying to do everything they can do to not discuss the fact that, number one, they're all lying pussies. And number two, that Donald Trump is basically a pedophile and or pedophile protector and a thief of the highest order imaginable.

So Lady Waters and his guest responded to AOC. Let's play the clip. Probably not. Girl, no conservative would want to date you. You are not untapping a mystery here. I mean, first of all, I mean, she broke up. She froze her eggs. she's eventually going to put them in and maybe some brave soul will stand up and be the father of those poor little children. But like, why would a conservative or want to marry her?

Like, hey, we're pregnant. We didn't say we didn't say marry. Okay. She's the father. Dave. Well, I know. Rewind that part again. What did she just say?

Poor little children. But like, why would a conservative ever want to marry her? Like, hey, we're pregnant. Oh, we think I'm going to get an abortion. We didn't say Mary. What? Okay. She's the father.

Day. I know, but at her age, she's going to want to eventually have a husband. How old is she? She's, what is she? 36. I have no idea. How old is she? We're not really allowed to talk about a woman's age.

No, we don't. Okay. This is a prime example of that woman who is a very, a woman that encompasses a lot of internal, internalized misogyny. I would even say there, it's absolutely external. Right. But she, these women, the argument that these conservatives want to make about women like us, is, well, do you support women?

Then why don't you support this person? Trying to belittle AOC because she's, what, 36, which is super young, y'all are all about, you know, autonomy, personal autonomy and all of this shit you claim, which we all know you're not. Why do you give a shit if she freezes her eggs? Like, why are they so consumed with the breeding practices of everybody else? And that lady was so unhinged that even Lady Waters was kind of like, you know, that takes a lot to do. But also this lie that like liberal women just get abortions for sport. And I have something I want to tell everybody. Growing up in Oklahoma, the majority of my friends around high school college aged were conservative Republicans.

Now, once I got, you know, I didn't hang out with any conservative religious Republicans. The abortion rate among those women in red states is astronomical because they can't let their parents or anybody know that they screwed. Nobody taught them about birth control. Nobody said, here's Planned Parenthood, here's where you go. Nobody told them about condoms. The abortion rate, and this is anecdotal among conservatives, they do it far more. or sport and for birth control than any liberal woman I have ever met who is all about getting birth control and advocating for their body because their parents and their community taught them about consent and taught them about pregnancy prevention. I don't know if there's a study out there or not, but I'm just telling you guys, abortions among Republican Christians in Bible Belt states,

those are the ones that are doing it for sport. Well, I would have to, just from my experience, I'd have to say it's higher because, like, in my friend group, people didn't want their parents to know they were on the pill because you're not supposed to be having sex before marriage. So if you're on the pill, then obviously it clues. So it was people had abortions because they didn't want to be on the pill because they don't want their parents to find out, that kind of thing. So it was like really backward in how it was happening.

So I completely had the exact same experience. But I just want to talk about this. We have a news station that is supposed to be news, Republican conservative news. I hear an uptick in talking about men and women's sports. I've seen so many interviews over on that channel that you're talking about something that, like, I can't remember who it was. I think it was Ken Paxton, but don't quote me, that he was just getting pummeled because his campaign said about it. And he immediately goes, well, James Telerico believes men for men to play in women's sports. I mean, that's just the go-to.

That's what we're talking about. Now we're talking about whether or not a conservative man wants to stay AOC or vice versa. We had me on the MAGA dating websites. They wanted 100% anti-vaxxer. So their value is you don't want a vaxor. You don't believe in science. I am not their person and vice versa. But to make it like AOC's the problem, and then wasn't Donald Trump, correct me if I'm wrong,

we all knew this wasn't going to happen, but I heard a lot of Republican women saying they thought it would, that infertility treatments were going to then be paid for by insurance. So what AOC is currently doing is what caused the huge uptick in Alabama after they said, yes, frozen eggs or frozen embryos have more rights than people. And Donald Trump got out on the campaign stage. He said, we are going to pay for IVF for women. So, of course, that didn't happen. Of course, we haven't heard about that issue since then.

But it's just, it is like, and you have said it so brilliantly. But we're talking about a news channel that had to pay because they're liars. And we're going into a midterm that's as deep, but 30% for Trump. and they're talking about whether aOC is going to freeze her eggs and women in men's sports, which is practically mathematically non-existent. It's just stupid. People are just stupid. I would also add to that to this, that Laura Ingraham, Lady Waters co-worker,

she sounds like she wants to date AOC. There's a clip where she's talking about how hot AOC is. sure she's gorgeous with those red lips and her raven hair. And then Laura Ingram goes on about Abdul El-Said. I mean, they are horny over there. They are horny at Fox News. I mean, Rupert could do the world some good by hiring some sex workers for, you know, these people. And let us know what their preference is, too. But the reality is this is just my personal theory. And we'll see if the science catches up with it. There's this big uptick not only in the in the lie that all of these trans people are taking over women sports, which is like, as you said, mathematically not there. But

there is this lie in maga media that liberal women are this huge, huge problem. I think it is that a lot of these conservative men probably have been turned down by. liberal women because of exactly what AOC said there. I'm sorry, my values don't align with yours. And they had to settle for not their first choice, maybe not their second choice. And so there's this idea that they want to be punitive to the object of their desire, which is the reason why I think the whole abortion thing exists, all of the homophobia exists. because these little pink arm men can get owned so quickly by women.

AOC is a million times sharper, smarter, more relatable than all of the maga men put together. And they want to demean her because she was a waitress. I was a waitress in college. And by doing that, when you're trying to become the party of the working class via a bunch of propaganda and lies. I think it's just it backfires. I think one of the best attributes somebody can tell me is, yeah, I waited tables in college or I waited tables because you learned so, it's such a valuable job. You learned so much. But this Republican desire to demean her, I think, me lady thinks they protest too much. All right, fall is here, rainy days, crisp air, cuddling up on the

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Just head to shop flamingo.com slash IHIP to claim this offer. And after you purchase, they'll ask where you heard about them. Please support our show and let them know that we sent you. Completely agree. The only thing I would add, and again, this is a total, but in my friend group that's out there in the wild dating. The with, I mean, 100% returns on every person that I know that has slept with somebody in MAGA, like didn't know they were MAGA or kind of was on the back burner or kind of

knew, but was kind of denying it. Horrible in debt. Horrible. I know. I know. 100% returns on that. They're all just like. Did you require about the penis size?

Considering you're a size. Yes. Yes. Yes. One, we like to affectionately refer to as two inch slim. Oh. I mean, I don't think it was two inches, but that's how we refer to it in our, what two inch limbs do today.

And then we do the pinky. So this is why they hate liberal women right there. I mean, this is, this is it. It's interesting. This is what they hate. That's exactly why. Because they sit around on group text and talk about how shitty they are in bed. But I mean, I'm sure it's a jackrabbit gyraider situation.

You know it is. I just spit water. You know it is. Stop. You know it is. We've talked about it. One trick ponies. One trick ponies.

All right. Let's see if we can make pumps laugh more. We'll stop at the end of shaming because it's my favorite thing to do. You are a size queen pumps. You are. And I'm not going to take that from you. I just, you enjoy it so much and I'm here, I'm here to help facilitate this very toxic judgmental habit of yours. Well, you would think that somebody who hasn't been laid in like 80,000 days would just take what they could get.

You would think, but then that wouldn't. Not me. Not me. No, thanks. We're going to move on to, is this a Reddit thing? What is this, Kylie? BuzzFeed. All right.

This is from BuzzFeed. and the headline goes, do you pop this up? Here we go. We are engaged now. 30 women admitted the unhinged mastermind plans. They pulled to try to lock down a man. And I don't know if I should applaud or gasp. Ooh, I'm excited. Okay, here's the first one. His father is dead. So faked my dad's death for years just so we could have something in common to talk about. And so he could hug and comfort me when I cry because I quote, missed my dad. That's psychotic. I had to have had a large penis. Yeah. I mean, to kill off your dad. That is not a jackrabic situation. The problem with that is if you play the tape through and you guys fall in love, then how do you explain

that your dad's alive and you've been lying about it this whole time? I think for liars like this, they do not have the ability to play the tape through. Just like no further than Trump. It's just an impulsive, what can I do for right now? And then they just probably get to that later and they're like, oh, well, I was talking about my stepdad, you know, and it just probably. All right. Put up the next one. Lenny says, I made my auntie, put my grandma in a retirement home he was a waiter at.

I'm telling you, I would like to do a background study on this and what is the through line? What do these men have that you're killing off your dad and you're sending your grandma to the old person's home? If I'm pumps, I'm going to lean into a large penis theory because I guarantee you these people are not jackrabbit gyraters. I guarantee you they're not because you would not pull out this kind of sociopathic line. You wouldn't want, I mean, you wouldn't go to this level of extreme for a jack rabbit. For a jack rabbit. No way. No.

Okay. Next one. Infiltrated his bloodline, befriended his mom, tracked and studied her, became her favorite every coincidence, what was precision. She thought she set us up. Nah. She executed my plan six years in. That's diabolical. Shit.

Wait, what? So this was her plan. It took she six years. She played the long game of six years. Befriended the mom. And then had the mom set them up. I kind of, like, I'm scared of this person, but I'm also in awe of them. So I'm kind of, I don't know what to say about that.

That's terrifying. And all, do you, let me ask you this. You haven't been in a relationship and quite. time. Yeah. And you being in awe of this, would you consider doing something like this? I don't have the patience. I don't have. I can't. There's no way I could play this kind of a long game. You know that I'm at worst. I just, I kind of like being pursued that, you know, like being chased a little bit. Like there's something fun in that, you know. Okay. But on the flip side, now, granted, I couldn't do this. But wouldn't there be.

kind of a charge that you put this plan into action. You infiltrated the mother. You took coincidence. You made coincidences out of nothing. Six years she thought like the winning like my plan worked. Wouldn't that be kind of a hit on that? No, to me, I would feel like, like I skirted the system. Like I want like Josh likes me for me and he like pursued. Yeah, he chased you. Me. Yeah, he chased me. And I don't know that, I don't know, maybe I'm an egomaniac or something, but I don't know that I would pursue somebody to that extent because it wouldn't feel real. Like, I want somebody to genuinely like me for me. And it's just so manufactured, it's too manufactured for my taste.

I don't feel like, I would feel like there was a payoff, but then I'd be like, you're fucked up. I'm going to fucking go back to therapy. Dumb bitch. I think there would be a part of me that like I plan this. Will feel accomplishment? There would be a part of me that's like I fucking nailed it. I did it. But then here's the thing.

You don't tell anybody. How do you not tell anybody that you're doing this? Because it's, I mean, at the end of the day, it's really embarrassing and desperate. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I don't think I could do it. I can do it. Yeah.

Okay. Let's go to the next one. Lily told him I wanted him to start going to a therapist and scheduled him in with a friend of mine who mind you is not a therapist. Diabolical or brilliant? I can't decide. Okay, here's the deal. I would love it more than anything.

If you like really like some guy, I think there's some guy at the gym that you think's hot and your son and up first class and your horn around up at the gym, which I saw. support 100%. That's true. A hundred percent support the sledding around at the gym via pumps. Ready for you to take it over the finish line. So as the listener. You know, he's married.

So it's not as fun as you. It didn't stop you before. On both sides, when I was married and when someone else was married. But I know. Is this growth? Is this growth on your part? Growth. Is this growth? We have a new boundary.

Do we have a new boundary? Kylie, sound the sirens. Sound the sirens. Sound the sirens. Pumps is no longer fucking with married people. Yes, Jesse Waters. Give it, give it.

Is that real? Yes, that's the ice cream. That was the ice cream. I was like, he's giving blow jobs on Fox News and we're just not, yeah, okay, it was ice cream. I'm impressed with your new boundary, pumps. I love you. I support you in your new boundary. Thank you.

Okay, but let's just say. let's say he's not married. I don't want to, I don't even hypothetically want to dishonor your new boundary. Okay. I've no longer. Thank you for respecting my boundary. You're welcome. So in this hypothetical situation, the guy that you have, the married man that you have

the hots for in the gym is unmarried. Okay. And you're liking him and he says I'd like to go to a therapist. I kind of, I want to date you times, but I have some issues and I want to go to a therapist and talk it through because I don't want to start something. if I'm a problem. And so I think there's chemistry in the gym. I've seen you come to my class.

I've seen you shake around your tits. And they are undeniably something I want to get my hands on. Right. So y'all are really, there's a lot of pheromones, a lot of sexual tension. He says, could you refer me to a therapist? And if you said, actually, I could. Yeah. Her name is Jennifer Welch.

Yeah. She works via Zoom. Yep. And she's fantastic. Here's the thing. I'd like to say I would. I kind of think I'd do it. I would 100% do it. I would 100.

And then here's what would happen. The minute, because we used to do this when we were both seeing actual licensed therapists, like convene after therapy. Can you imagine the, he leaves and the phone call between us dissecting every single one of the things that he said? Because by virtue of the fact you're not a therapist, there's no confidentiality. we fucking kidding here. He leaves, you'd be in on the Zoom in the green room. Are you kidding me? Like I would have to update you. You would be in on mute. I'll be like, Kylie, I can't hear. Replug me in. Yeah, I'd be all over it. Yeah, that would be too delicious to pass up. It absolutely would be. Okay. And you have good advice. So I don't think it would be like a huge red flag. Like, she's not a therapist.

You know all the lingo and stuff. Here's the reason. Here's the truth listener. Because I've been in therapy. for a long time. That's why I know the lingo. Yeah. Okay. Same. Okay. Allison, I've spent five years finding his Spotify, memorized every single song and added

them to my playlist, and we bonded over our music taste. We are engaged now. I don't know what this says about me, but I don't think that's that crazy. I don't either. I don't just like, okay. I don't. I don't either. I think the thing about one thing I want to say to our younger listeners, when you're young,

there is this overwhelming desire to couple up. Yeah. And you might in public spaces be like, I'm fine, being single, blah, blah, blah. And at least I'm speaking from my vantage point. But deep down, we kind of wanted at that, in our younger ages, we wanted to couple up. It was like we wanted somebody to see us as attractive. and we wanted to see them as attractive. And you've got hormones and pheromones at the wazoo.

And you want to make out. You want to, I mean, for sure, I have, I told you guys, my high school boyfriend, Sean, he was into archery. And I'm out there fucking Joan of Arc. And he was into camping and hiking and all this shit. I bought hiking boots. I had a bow and arrow. I was into all the shit that I'm so not outdoorsy or a hiker with hiking boots. I'm a walker.

I love to go walk and things like that. But hiking boots. Yeah, I've spent my fair share of nights and a tent for a guy. And I believed it. I believed I really genuinely liked these things. And that's just a part of being young when you get older because you don't know yourself well enough. So it's pretty easy to on a dime go, yeah, those are all my favorite songs too.

Oh my gosh, you like them? I love them knowing it's his number one. I would do all that shit. I did crazy, crazy shit. Crazy shit. I mean, there's so many things. I think also you're discovering who you are. I mean, it might turn out that she loves that music, like she was never exposed to it,

and she fucking loved it. So, I mean... I think she loved him. I think as you're trying to figure out who you are, I think later in life when you know who you are and your give effect meter starts to break, because that's true liberation in adulthood, the more your give effect meter breaks, then you're unwilling to compromise. But early on, when your hormones and your feelings and your feelings and your feelings and your pheromones and you're dying to couple up. Oh, you'll compromise the shit out of everything to

couple up. Well, and also the, you know, this will change, like I will change his mind or I will change the biggest lie we tell ourselves. It is the biggest lie we tell ourselves that they're going to change. You're going to change them. Like, except who they are now because it's not changing. It just doesn't. Okay. Who's next? Last one. Sierra, I made him a batch of cookies, which my friend convinced me to spit in to make him fall in love with me. We've now been dating for almost two years. I don't know that I would have spit in it, but I, you know, I mean, the spitting's gross, but I can't say I would never, ever, ever have done that if my friend said it was the deal.

Here's the deal. I'm just going to tell you, someone very close to me bought a spell online for Metsie, a love spell for she and a friend. and she's been dating someone for like a year since. A guy? Yeah. Girl or girl guy? No.

She bought a love spell for she and another single friend online from Etsy. And now the person that bought the spell has. So when you go buy a spell, like a love spell. She bought a joint spell. Like if I'm the buyer, I could go on Etsy and say, I buy a spell that pumps and me fall in love. But not with each other, but with other people. Like she bought two loves. spell. She bought a love spell for herself.

Okay. This is my love spell. And then she bought the same spell for a friend and sent it to a friend. And they're both in a relationship? The friend is not, but she is. And it's been almost a year since like dating. Okay. Here's what I propose. Get the contact of this Etsy witch. Send it to Kylie and me. Okay. And the listener. And then we are going to buy this for you. Because as we've talked about for four years now, we all need for you to either get laid, go on a date. We all need this in Trump's America pumps. Yeah. But here's, I mean, as a friend personally, I know that you enjoy your alone time.

And I enjoy my alone time too. That's something we're talking about as you grow. You don't have this overwhelming desire to couple up. But I also know that you really, especially the last couple of years, have kind of come into your own in a way you never have before. And I think that you are more ready and datable now than you ever happen. And I think a man would really enjoy you and you would enjoy him. And I think your experience with dating if the suitor is not a dweeb, a jackrabbit or all, you know, teeny weaning all stuff. Married.

married fitness trainer that's a theme oh my god yeah it is married fitness trainer yeah maybe that's just close proximity anyway let me finish this I do I feel like it would be fun for you if the guy was not a psycho maggot

and all this stuff unvaxed I don't know but it's your choice not mine it's 100 million percent your choice I do 100% think that I would entertain that there has been in times of my life, I absolutely wouldn't entertain it. I would entertain it. I don't want to go out looking for it because I'm too lazy. But I would entertain it. Like if a cute guy called and asked me out to dinner, I'd probably go and be excited. But I also would be remiss if I didn't say you're

completely content not having it. One million percent. And I don't want to project on to you like I think you're incomplete because you're not doing that because I don't see that. I don't see that even remotely as being like a deficit. I see you now as living a better. life that you've ever lived since the very first day that I met you in 2004 or five, whenever it was. I genuinely do. So I don't think this is a deficit. You know how people will say like, are you going to have kids?

Are you going to get married? I don't want to be that in your ear. No, and you never have been. I do think a couple of dates here and here for the pod. I do think some sex would be nice. Oh. Oh. So maybe some of you.

Maybe you should go work over at Fox. They're horny over there. They are horny. And I'd like to welcome all the Fox producers. Welcome to our show. We know you clip it up. And there's also, who's that other one that's been clipping us up lately?

Ted Cruz. MRC. MRC. MRC. Media Research Council or something. They chop us up all the time. And they're like really psycho-maga thumpers, a bunch of white, crusty pink arm men that really like Donald Trump's,

I can only assume the, uh, uh, uh, oral sex he performed on the microphone. Seems to turn on a lot of maga men. There's a lot of like oral sex gesturing going on over there. Okay, last story. AI is coming for one of the last wholesome things we have left. AI slop is ruining cute animals on the internet. Pet owners, rescue agencies and wild life groups are calling for new safeguards as AI makes

it harder to tell whether animals from polar bears, to house cats are real or fake. And then pop this up. AI generated videos and pictures are destroying one of the largest and most enduring sources of joy and compassion on the internet. Animals. Whether the imagery features sailors rescuing a polar bear, baby cows separated from their mothers, or a lost pet that was miraculously found, many people have reached the point where they can't take the creatures on their feeds at face value anymore. The explosion of deep fakes and AI slop over the past few years has led to widespread frustration

among viewers, creators, and organizations that support animals forcing everyone to hunt in the pixels for glitches or other telltale signs. Real evocative images often pull on viewers' heartstrings and are an important way for conservation and welfare projects to attract donations. So I 100% agree with this. And I have been guilty of this. I went through a phase where there was AI. And I immediately knew it was AI when I saw it. And it was French Bulldogs doing diving tricks off of high dives and other things that French Bulldogs were doing.

And once I interacted with one, then I interacted with another, then I interacted with another. and then a whole other set of AI slop came up that I interacted with, which is, I might have told you all this before, but I'm going to tell you again, because I have my for you page is a lot of tennis, animals, and travel. And it was an obese Roger Federer playing an obese Raphael Nadal. And I was so fascinated by it. I looked at it and I watched it again. And so I had a lot of AI slop come into my 4U page. And I have rebuilt it, brick by brick, back to all real content with the exception of that hot UPS guy that I'm going to set pumps up with.

He's still popping up from time to time. So I'm trying to get rid of him. But I just, I don't like this stuff. I want to know what we're seeing is real. I want especially the good stuff, the animals. Yeah, the animals. And rescuing, like, people send money and they have people that are in that area that adopt. I mean, it's a, there are real consequences to that.

And I've watched the French bulldogs doing diving board tricks. That's kind of no harm, no foul. You know, everybody knew immediately it was AI. But yeah, this worries me, but I'm just going to tell you, and I'm kind of ashamed to admit it, but I've thought a lot about that UPS driver since our last episode. He's come into my mind. And I'm like, God, he was really cute. Like, I kind of get it while people are into the.

these AI boyfriends, I'm not proud of it. I know. It's, this is, this is, this is, this is the problem. You're horny. We just established that, you know, and then we have this hot UPS guy that I didn't know if he was gay or European or what's wrong with him because he can't be that great. Well, it turns out he's AI, of course. And I just, you know, then now the problem perhaps is you're going be envisioning yourself with that UPS driver. And I do think you could secure it. There's no way. That is so far out of my leap, even in AI. But now if you do go out into the dating world and let's say, you know, you do get laid, let's say you just say it's not dating. You're like, okay, I'm just going to. And then takes his clothes off and he's not the UPS guy.

That's going to be problematic. Because if you're lesting over the UPS guy. Your expectations are just set into a hemisphere that's not realistic. You know? But yeah, the UPS guy, he's hopped in. He's hopped into my thoughts. Like, I kind of get it. Do you want me to send you his accounts? You can follow it.

No, I found it. Oh, you did. Well, I just, for you, like hot AIEP. Did you go to his page? Yes. I mean, I'm not proud of it, but yes, I did. Because he was so cute. I was like, and this is all excuses in line.

But I really wanted to see if I could have, you know, are there any tells? And there weren't. Oh, so this was a research project of yours. This was a, like I said, that's all lies and. This is you combating AI on your own research project. This is Gen Xers sharpening their eyeballs to spot AI. We start with this account first. It was a public service.

It wasn't that I thought he was hot. Here's the deal. Here's what you could do. Then after that, you could make an account. Because everybody makes an account for everything, even for fake shit. You can make an account. Be like, hi, I'm Pumps. Follow me at Pumps, Pumps, Pumps.

And I am going to be your Gen X, AI, Eagle Eye. Ladies, we're going to start with this UPS guy. I thought, my God, he's hot. I'd hit it. And I'd quit it. But here's our tells that he's not real. And then you could learn. And then you could make a whole.

real page about how to combat AI with hot guys, hot AI guys. I want to cut. It's not a terrible idea. You'd have to get a cut because you and Kylie would have to help me with this. Like when she's talking about going into the pixels, determine AI, I just don't, I'm not good at it figuring it out. Like if they have five, like eight fingers, I can figure it out. Yeah.

That's a pretty big tell. But that, I feel like that's going, I mean, it's just getting better and better, the faking. Yeah. No, it is. It is getting better, better. It has to be regulated. We have to. I just want to say something as we close out. The midterms are upon us. And this, of course, is our more lighthearted podcast Tuesdays, Thursdays. I've had it. But we also have the daily IHIP news that you need to go subscribe to. It all comes down the same YouTube channel. But if you are a listener, it's actually two different feeds you need to subscribe to. But we have to turn out in dro for these midterms to vote because this AI needs to be regulated. Pumps is out there in love with this UPS guy that I introduced her to because I was previously in love with him. And I fell in love with him before I knew it was fake. Then you sent him to me knowing he was fake still fell in love. That was an attribute for you. It definitely has its pluses. But AI needs to be regulated. We need to

know that when we're watching stuff, especially for people with advanced age like pumps, they need to be able to say, oh, AI, this is not real. And we need to put a stop on all the cruelty that these guys are doing. And I know that we have a lot of as we start our podcast, you know, gay triots, patriots, trans triot, black triots, brown triots. We have a lot of people that this administration is hyper-focused on demeaning. And so I beg of everybody to have a plan, start right now as soon as you finish this. How am I going to vote? Where am I going to vote? Check to make sure that your voter registration is still all intact, especially if you live in a MAGA state, like Texas or any sort of red state. Make sure it's all there. Talk to your friends,

get a plan to vote together. I'm not trusting the mail-in voting. Everybody has to do what's right for them, but I'm just not trusting this. Donald Trump is out of being his bonnet about mail-in voting for quite some time, particularly in red states. I wouldn't trust this. The Postmaster General is a big Trump sycophant. And they're just going to try to cheat in every way they can. And we have to send a message not only to the world, but to ourselves. Yeah. To ourselves, we are better than this. And we love our country. And we know we're fucked up. But we are trying to be better and we are going to try to correct this and write this wrong. And we need this celebration in November. We need to see that map light up blue and go into the streets and get on your on your for you page. And it's just people celebrating. We need a national celebration that goodness can prevail. So please, please, please, everybody in the I-Hipster community have plans, contact people that, you know,

you haven't even spoken to in a while. Start annoying group texts. Is everybody planning to vote? Let's all go do it in person. Make sure your phone's charged and you're going to film because little booster box, Mullins is going to have ice at the polls. And so it's going to be a, it's a big fucking deal and it's a big fucking day, but we do it together without fear.

And I just, we deserve this. We deserve a. an outpouring of goodness. Yeah. Against these fascists. All right. Pumps, what's your take on all that?

I think we, I think you're so right. Like we need a galvanizing moment to feel uplifted and together because those have been so hard to come by. But I would just say if you are married, divorced, if you've recently changed your name, please check with your local election, count, county election board. I went. They were still registered with my old name.

had to go, but just please make sure because they're trying to make it harder and harder for women to vote. I know the Save Act hasn't passed yet, but I've never been asked for an ID to vote ever in my entire life in Oklahoma. And the last, you know, since all this banging of the drum on, you know, illegal immigrants voting, which is just factually incorrect, I've had to present my driver's license and there were two different names on it. So please check and make sure that you are registered to vote in your legal name on your driver's license or passport. Very good tips. Also, do me a favor.

Pre-order my book. It's coming out in a month. It's called Not Today Fascist. It's linked right below in the show notes. And make sure you're subscribed. We don't know what's going on with YouTube, but a lot of you have messaged us that our stuff isn't popping up in the feed anymore. So make sure you're subscribed.

Turn on notifications. Give us a comment. tell us, you know, you like us. If you have something terrible to say about us, make sure you let us know that too in the comment section. And we will see you guys next Tuesday. No, Thursday. And we will see you guys next Thursday.