I've Had It - Your Call is Unimportant to Us

Episode Date: June 20, 2024

Pumps is in her 'I hate people' era. NEW MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE at https://ivehadit.store and Subscribe to I've Had It wherever you get your podcasts by visiting linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast Thank you to our sponsors: Happy Mammoth: Listener, you can get your first bottle of Hormone Harmony for 15% OFF if you use the code HADIT on the checkout page. Go to https://HappyMammoth.com and enter the promo code HADIT on the checkout page. DoorDash: DoorDash. Your door to more. Download the DoorDash app now to get almost anything delivered. *Must be 21+ to order alcohol. Drink responsibly. Alcohol is available only in select markets. Homes.com: When it comes to finding a home - not just a house - we have everything you need to know, all in one place. https://homes.com. We’ve done your home work. Pretty Litter: Go to https://PrettyLitter.com/hadit to save 20% on your FIRST order and get a free cat toy. Terms and conditions apply. See site for details. Lume: Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get 15% off with promo code Hadit at https://LumeDeodorant.com! #lumepod To watch our post-show for this episode and much more - subscribe to our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/IveHadItPodcast Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps

Ready? One, two, three. That was a great clap. I have to redeem myself after that string of hideous ones. Yeah, I know you've had some bangers that echoed all through the Northern Hemisphere. Right. I mean, everybody thought it was an earthquake earthquake but it was just my cloud. Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with, up to my eyeballs, is when you call customer service and they put you on hold for a decade and the whole time they're telling you, your call is so important to us. My call is clearly not fucking important to you or you would answer. I wouldn't be on this animated digital thing for hours and hours and hours. At the very least, let me leave my phone number and you call me back. But sitting there on hold having a computer tell me how important

I am to them is bullshit and it incenses me. That's so true. I mean, why do they tell you you're important? You're obviously not important. Right. Or they'd have a human answer. Yeah. Or at least, you know, pretty good AI. Yeah. But no, it's just fucking awful. Yeah, you know, customer service is, it is a minefield of grievances. It really is. It's like the TSA of the phone. And I have to say, I've been at my worst as a human being when I am on the phone with customer service.

I mean, there are some moments where I'm not proud of my behavior. I get so mad and so irritated at the incompetence on the other end of the phone. Then I hang up, and then like an hour, two hours later, I'm like, God, that person has a terrible job. And I was just the biggest bitch imaginable. So I'm trying to be better. I'm pretty good. I'm a lot worse in person with people, customer service than I am on

the phone. But there are certainly moments I'm not proud of. Elaborate on the in-person bitchiness. Well, you know, I care around. I mean, I went into the AT&T store the other day and really showed my ass. I mean, big time. Yeah, I've seen when we've been traveling for the pod, I've seen some grandstanding Karenism.

Right, I mean, I just get so frustrated. It's like my eyes glaze over and I just become a complete fucking bitch. Yeah, I've seen it. Yeah. Yeah. I am better in person. And then on the phone recently, we were traveling back from abroad

and our luggage didn't make it. And I was on the phone with this woman and I said I need for you to put a rush on those bags and make sure they make it because there are items in the luggage that we have to have. And she was like well of course I'm gonna rush it and I was like okay well the appropriate response would have been absolutely we'll rush it. But she was real snippy with me. Right. But then I if I put myself in her position, if I'm dealing with a bunch of disgruntled people that have been dicked over by corporate America, phone call after phone call after phone call, probably not making that great

of a wage, I'd probably be bitchy too. Yeah, I often think like when you're on the phone with those people, they have no control over it. And they don't. Every single time they pick up the phone, somebody's mad. Yeah. It's like being a lawyer, a divorce lawyer. Every time you answer the phone, it's because somebody has a problem. That's like our listeners.

Every time they put their earbuds in to listen to this shit show, somebody's mad and it's you and me. Somebody's mad and it's you and me. Somebody's mad. It's not just somebody. It's right here. We're the customer service podcast. We are. Yeah.

Or lack thereof, depending on your point of view. Exactly. All right, Patriots, let me tell you what I've had it with. I've had it with a parking issue that I've encountered quite a bit lately. And it's when you're going to a place and parking is kind of scarce. Right. And you've got all the ducks in a row.

And then you've got some asshole who has their car either right on the white line or a few inches off of the white line. And then it leaves a spot that no one can fit into unless you have a roller skate that you're planning on parking there. And it makes me so furious. So the other day, I went to pickleball.

And a group of my friends were already playing on another court. And I went to pull in the lot. And my friend Libby, her car was, I mean it was over, I'm talking six inches. She was mid game. So I stormed into Chicken and Pickle. I mean just to play out of your Karen playbook. I stormed in there. I think they're mid point, which is a huge no-no. And I'm waiting for her to slam the ball, somebody get in. I'm like, Libby, you need to go look at your parking spot. Nobody could park next to you.

And she's like, oh my God, I know I'm the worst. Am I over the line? I'm like, yeah, by multiple inches. I'm sure she was delighted for you to point that out mid pickleball game. But you know, it was a great parking spot next to her, but nobody could use it because she took up two. She took up about, here's the problem, they take up 80% of one and 20% of the other, leaving it useless. They render this entire coveted

parking spot useless because of their just reckless abandon, running into play pickleball. Now listen, nobody loves to run into the pickleball court with enthusiasm as much as I, but I really try to center my car. I try. I'm sure there's going to be times where I've done a bad parking job, but I'm really trying to make an effort ever since Libby dicked me over on that really good spot at the pickleball courts. Sometimes it's a good reminder, like, oh, I got to do better. Yeah. But what I hate is when somebody does that and then the person next to them does that. And so then it's just the domino effect of everybody's fucked over all the way down the line.

It is. I mean, it's just fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. Every spot. You know, when you wake up in the morning and you go out, there are just fuck yous throughout the entire course of your day with people that generally lack self-awareness, don't take into account the feelings of anybody else around them. And this could be from not picking up your dog's shit. If somebody shits, walking their dog and their dog shits in your front yard and they don't pick it up, that's

a huge fuck you. That's a huge fuck you in the form of a heaping pile of dog shit, a literal pile of dog shit. Literal. Which I believe you've confessed before that you've done, but that's either here or there. But I went back the next day and picked it up. Yeah, but for a day it was a big fuck you. I know, but it was on the public part.

It wasn't on somebody's yard. Right. And so then, you know, you've got the people who take up parking spaces. You've got the corporations that say, you're so important to me via a robot while you're on hold for 45 minutes. Right, when you're not important.

That makes you feel so insignificant. Right. Yeah. Because here's the deal. You know they're telling everybody how important they are. Yeah. And it's like, how can I be special

if everybody's special? Yeah. So. Yeah, it's bullshit. It's bullshit. All right, welcome to I've had it. I'm your customer service representative, Jennifer. You are important to us. Your listenership is important to us. Right. All one of you. What's your name? My name is Angie. It's been

how many days, Kylie? 725. Yeah, I think you're just making it up every time. I think it's just a new number every time. Let's just go with like 1,000. Let's just start at 1,000. The star of our show has not been laid in over 1,000 days. It sounds right. Which is why. Feels right.

Which is why for a couple of months there, you'll heard all that naughty talk coming out of her. Yeah. Kylie, what's going on on the World Wide Web? Speaking of naughty talk, I've got a five-star review from Braxton. Braxton says, I have the clap because of these homosexual male here. After listening to this show, you will notice Memaw has her clap at the start of every show. When it goes well, she gets so excited, very excited. She seems to slip into a euphoric state. So one day after taking an edible, I decided to incorporate Mima's clap into my life. At first it was just stupid fun. And then one day at about 3.15 PM, I did the clap and it was a good one. 10 out of 10 status. A tingle ran up

my spine. Dare I say I had a spiritual awakening. I now understand why Memaw gets so damn excited when she has a good clap. I get it. And now I have the clap and it won't go away." That is just beautiful. Here's the thing, it sounds like if you're just listening to this podcast as you're driving on the road, you think that's the dumbest fucking thing to care about. Like who cares? You have a good clap. But there's just something about it when you do it well, you're just like, I fucking killed it.

And if you do it bad, you're just like, I fucking suck. Braxton's over there munching on edibles clapping. I mean, that makes me so happy that now he gets the thrill. Yeah. And he says, I have the clap. Because that was one of my very, and one of the very first podcast episodes, I said, I'll do the clap, but I don't have clap.

Because you know, that's another name for an STD. I can't remember which one. But I said, that just, just warms my heart, Braxton. All right, what else are they saying about the podcast on the World Wide Web? I've got another five-star review titled Mother-in-Law. They say, I've been an avid listener of the pod for quite some time.

I hang on every word these ladies have to say as they shout loud and proud every single petty little thing we would all love to say, but are too scared to. My mother-in-law recently passed away and never have I felt myself more connected to these women. If only I had a Jennifer to call and say the bitch is dead without any judgment and with total understanding. You ladies are the drug I need to get through the day keep it up Yeah, I'll never forget that phone call. I didn't call her a bitch in my own defense. Not in that particular phone call.

No, no, no, no. She'd been called a bitch many times. I mean, you would have called her a bitch so many times, I don't even think that you could calculate it. It was an infinite, she's a bitch loop. Crazy bitch, I believe was exactly. And I hate her. The phrasing, yes, but I'll never forget. I'll never forget. I was at the bookstore

in the travel book section and I'm just kind of like salivating over, should I buy the Italy book? Should I buy the France book? And I looked down at my cell phone. I think it might have even been a flip phone. Yeah, it was a plot. And I see that it's you. And I'm like, Oh, it's Pumps. Hello. She's dead. Okay. Are you okay? Yeah, I'm totally fine. Click. Hands up on me. Did you call her back? Did you text her? Or was that it? That was it. But here's something I don't know if I've shared this or not. And if I have,

it's worth a repeated share. Oh, now I'm scared. So obviously she was relieved and sociopathic regarding the passing of her mother-in-law. You know, just she's dead. That was the end of it. So what happened a year later shocked the shit out of me. I go over to her house and Pumps his house back in the day. She lived on this street called Whipperwill and it always smelled like bacon and sausage. Every single time you walked in the front door, just bacon and sausage slapped you in the face. And it always kind of shocked me because I'd looked down and she would have literally like a plate with just a mountain of bacon on it and another plate with a mountain of sausage. I'm talking like an all-you-can-eat style buffet quantities for a family of five.

Her husband was already gone, so it was just for her and like her toddlers. And I'd always look at those plates and I'd say, do you feed your kids bacon and sausage every single morning? And she'd go, yeah, like who doesn't? And I'm like, do you worry about cholesterol? And she's like, no. Okay, whatever. So I walk in to the bacon and sausage smelling house.

The phone call had taken place. She died a year prior. I sit down at the island that she has and there's the plate of said bacon and sausage in front of me. And then she reaches into a drawer and pulls out this card with an envelope and a red ink pen. And she slides it across the island to me and she says, I need for you to sign this. I said, what is it? And she said, it's a condolence card for my husband's mother's death. I go, didn't she die like a year ago?

And weren't you happy about it? She's like, she died a year ago to the day as a matter of fact and I need for you to sign it. I go, why do I need to sign it? Why are you dragging my ass into this? Just don't give me lip and just fucking sign it, okay? I'm trying to be better. I'm trying to be a nicer, more empathetic wife.

Will you just please fucking sign it? So I have this card to her now ex-husband, but the time was her husband. And it's like a literally a year late and a dollar short where pumps wants me to sign, you know, like dear ex-husband, I'm sorry, your mom died, XO, Jen. And I signed it just like that, put it in the envelope and passed it back. She's like, thanks. So he got a card that said, you know, sorry condolences.

He opens it up and it's love Jen and pumps. No, it was about two separate cards. I brought one from, I got one. So you did your own. She bought one. She drug me into this shit show. She drug me into it. Yeah.

I bought one with a red ink pen. And while I was there, I got one from her. And I had to give him one. To be fair, I gave it to him on your behalf. You still made me fucking sign it and drug me into this. I know, I know. But now that I'm even thinking about it, and you browbeat me about this all the time, and I just now, like, I remember thinking, I need to mark this anniversary, so I went and got a card for myself.

It had never even occurred to me it would be weird to get one for you. You know what? I don't even think it occurred to you when you slid it over to me and I signed it. You were just so hell bent on me signing this card to memorialize the one year anniversary of her passing. And I remember I was just exasperated. I was incredulous. I couldn't believe. I know. Yeah.

But I did it? You did it. I own it. You know what you did? Here's what happened. You went to Target or wherever, probably fucking Walmart and you're shopping the cards and it was a miserable experience. Misery loves company. If I have to do this, you know who else has to do it? That twat, Jennifer. She's going to fucking do it with me. And you know what I did? I did it. And I bitched about it and I'm still bitching about it. We'll be in the

assisted living center together. I mean, you could be taking your last breath. But guess what? I'm not signing a year from now. Any card memorializing the passing of your death. I'm already chock full of that shit. Right. I remember you trying to give me lip about it and I was just like, just shut up and sign it. Why does it matter? Just sign it. Just sign it. Yeah. So in hindsight, don't you think it's kind of weird that I would have given you a card? Yeah. And I also think it's Freudian that I like a year from the day I got a card almost like I was happy about it, but trying to disguise it maybe. I don't know. The whole thing was weird from top to bottom. Top to bottom. But you know what? We did a

lot of weird shit. That was just, I mean, that was minor. That was a Tuesday. Before lunch, after lunch, there was a whole other shit of crazy. Well, that was during breakfast, during the 20 pound plate of bacon and sausage that you served up every morning to your children. God, I'm surprised that they haven't had heart attacks yet. I don't know. You know, Pumps, I feel like our whole lives we've gone through this roller coaster of hormonal issues. One minute you're tired, next minute you're bloated, the next minute you have like you're edgy and on nerves.

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Go to happymammoth.com and enter the the code HADDIT on the checkout. Go to happymammoth.com and enter the promo code HADDIT on the checkout page. Pumps, springtime and summer vibes are in the air. Sometimes I bring home beautiful flowers that are blooming and I put them in a vase in my house and I definitely want to smell those and not my litter box. But now I've discovered Pretty Litter. Nothing beats Pretty Litter's ability to instantly trap odor. It's ultra-absorbent, it's lightweight, it's low dust, and it's a six-pound bag that works up to a month.

This really gives me a peace of mind because Pretty Litter's crystals change color to indicate early signs of potential illnesses in my cat, like urinary tract infections, kidney issues, and more. And if that's not enough, Pretty Litter ships free right to my front door. I never run out. I don't have huge kitty litter bags taking up space. And even better, I don't have to lug those huge tubs from a store to my car and into my house. Pretty Litter is amazing. You have to try it. Go to prettylitter.com slash had it to save 20%

on your first order and you get a free cat toy. That's prettylitter.com slash had it to save 20% off your first order and the free cat toy. Prettylitter.com slash had it. Terms and conditions apply. Please see site for details. Oh my god pumps. One of the greatest loves of my life living in this modern world is the app DoorDash. I'll get home from playing pickleball. I'm dying of thirst. Next thing I know, I go to the refrigerator. I'm out because I didn't restock. Enter DoorDash and I have electrolytes being delivered quick and easily right to my front door. I love having DoorDash bring me food when I'm just fluffed up on the couch doing nothing but watching TV.

Last month I was at home sick. I didn't have any meds. Guess what? DoorDashed. Over-the-counter meds came. I took them. The next day I felt so much better. Listener, it's DoorDash. Your door to more. Download the DoorDash app now to get almost anything from pet food to snacks to neck braces to alcohol to toothpaste to joy con controllers to headphones to you get it must be 21 plus to order alcohol drink responsibly alcohol available in select markets. All right I thought we would do something kind of fun today. Okay. Switch it up. Okay.

We're going to play Had It or Hit It with you two. Oh, okay. Oh, that's fun because we never get to play it. You don't. We're never contestants. No, no one's ever asked you. We're always the hosts. Today's your day.

Okay. Oh my God. Welcome to Had It or Hit It. I would hit it. Had it. Had it. I hit it every day, sometimes twice a day. All right, up first. Had it or hit it? Protesters at Pride. Had it. Oh my, I've had it. I mean, it just infuriates me.

I don't go to MAGA rallies and protest because it's not my business what you do in your free time. If you want to be a net and advertise your net swing for the fences. That's your deal. It infuriates me when I got a problem. Remember that, uh, what's that Westboro Baptist church with all their hateful signs, I'm just like, if you don't want to celebrate, stay home. It's not really that hard. But I just fucking hate people.

You know, the older I get, the more I just hate people. Amen. I just do. Welcome to I've Had It podcast, Pops. It's taken her a while to figure out where she is, you guys, at this advanced age, but she just figured it out today. Today. Hate people.

We hate people. All right. Regarding this, something has really, really, really bothered me that's been in the news lately, and it is the wife of Samuel Alito. You had that journalist who I fucking worship, who went into some Supreme Court lunch or dinner or whatever, and acted like she was a conservative and clandestinely recorded this bitch, Samuel Alito's wife. What's her name? Martha Ann?

Martha, which isn't that a name of a handmaid? It sure is. Okay. And so anyway, she records her saying, I'll tell you what I'm going to do when all this nonsense is over. The nonsense, meaning her husband having to appear as an objective jurist on the highest court of the land. She said, I'm going to get my Jesus flag and put it up on my flagpole because I have to

stare at that pride flag for a whole month. And I thought, there it is right there. That is the Christian hate that everybody sees. And there she's just articulated it right there. She thinks that that is a tit for tat situation where, oh, you're going to talk about loving everybody? Well, I'm going to put up my version of Jesus and it's going to be a big fuck you to your sense of equality. And it just has really bothered me that in 2024, the, we know he feels the same way.

Of course he does. His decisions. Right. Reflect it. And that hatred towards the LGBTQ community and she uses her religion and her faith to weaponize it and to feel so superior. It's just disgusting. So I have had it with protesters to the LGBTQ plus community. Furthermore, I think it's despicable when people are members of a church by no fault of their own other than their parents took them there and indoctrinated them in it. And as you go forward in life and you find out that gay people exist, that trans people exist, and that they did not choose to be that way, that they are simply living who they are, and they don't want more than you. They want the same as you. And you find out that that church that indoctrinated you

has lied to you your entire life, and lied to you about the destiny of these people and told you that these people are less than you, that they are sinners and that they are making quote unquote bad sinful choices, that you still continue to go to that church and give them money. That is an enabling that I abhor more than anything on the planet. So there are many, many ways that people, in my opinion, can be assholes about the LGBTQ plus community. And the most overt is being a protester at a pride parade. But the covert are all of you fuckers who go to these churches that preach this shit.

And they might not be real loud about it, but it's kind of like, well, it's a sin. Marriage is between a man and a woman, and you tied to that church, you're enabling all of the bigotry, in my opinion. Right. Well, and you're teaching it, and it's cruel. It is. It's cruelty. And it's such a marginalized group of people.

And look at this woman. Her husband has risen, ascended to an incredible place in American politics to be a justice on the Supreme Court. And she's mad about a pride flag for a month. That's so fucked up. Fuck you, Martha Alito. Go fuck yourself and your husband. And let's throw in the handmaid, the beer drinker, Clarence Thomas and his fuck face wife too. Yeah, all right, what's next? All right, up next, had it or hit it, people on social media who post in my blank era. Okay, here's where I am on that.

Depends on the poster. I've noticed about myself, a lot of the stuff that I've had it with, if I don't like the person, I really hate shit like that. But if I like the person, then I think it's adorable. If it's a dog posting,

I'm in my GoFetch era or something, I fucking hit that shit all day long. If it's some performative, bullshit, performative bullshit, performative Instagram page, I will have had it. So I'm a total, I can have it and hit it with those things. Right, and you're 100% right. The post completely depends on how I feel about the person.

Yeah. Whether I like what they're saying or other. Even if I don't know them, I've already kind of formed like, I dig this person based on their posts or whatever. Like, if you posted something like in your, like with one of your political t-shirts and you put, I'm in my get out the vote era, I would be like double tap, shared a story. I would think it was the cutest thing I ever saw. Oh, look at Pumps is being so edgy at her advanced age using all the young kids lingo.

Right. I would hit it all day long. But if Martha Alito had a page and she put like, I'm in my Jesus Christ flag era, I'd be like, fuck her, fuck the era's phrase, blah, blah, blah. So I think it depends on the person. Yeah. And I have noticed the era thing more. And I was just like, why is everybody era, you know, talking about eras, Taylor Swift concerts or whatever.

I know it takes you a few days to figure shit out, doesn't it? More than a few days. It only took you almost two years to figure out that we hate people on this podcast. No, I know. But I mean, like the era thing, it was like an epiphany. And that was maybe a month or two ago that I was like, oh, that explains it. I know. But you know what? The listeners are very sympathetic.

Right. Older people. You come out here at this advanced stage as America's meemaw, America's biggest patriot on the planet, the best clapper, and people are really empathetic to your polite pumps. And I do want to say, I'm really, really proud of our listeners because I feel like we're doing our part as a community to take back the word patriot. We have taken it back and you know what? That fucking eagle is ours.

That eagle is our bird. You know what? Republicans don't even like animals. If the eagle, if the eagles were endangered, they'd be like, okay, yeah, let's shoot them even more. They don't even fucking like animals. They don't care about the environment. The eagle is ours and the flag is ours and the word patriot is ours. Right, and they can have the flag of Liberia. They can have the flag of Liberia and climate change. The eagle, that is, I want that eagle.

The eagle is ours, officially. I agree. Patriots, the eagle is officially our bird. Right. I like it. All right, had it or hid it. Hiring a photographer or videographer to be in the delivery room. I completely had it.

Oh my God. I'm just repulsed by delivery room. I completely had it. Oh my God, I'm just repulsed by that. I've completely had it. We were so shocked. I have been so shocked, and our listeners are much younger than we are. We have a very young listener base. I was shocked when people started hiring photographers

for engagements. I agree. Because back in the day, it was something that was so private between the couple only. And it was a moment that you have, that you have to kind of imprint into your brain. And then afterwards, you would go tell your family and friends. But it was a real moment that you had together. And now engagements are completely

staged with photographers, videographers, groups, etc. Blah, blah, blah. So, I mean, first and foremost, let me just tell you this. I've also been shocked at people that have on hair and makeup done for the post delivery photo. Because after I gave birth, I look like hammered fucking dog shit. Yeah. Because I requested every narcotic available. Absolutely. In the situation. I did not want to push a baby out without any sort of narcotics. So I was puffed up like fucking Elvis Presley right before he died.

I was a puffed up drug pushing pusher at the moment. And so I can't imagine having any of that documented. I don't think I can even find a photograph of myself pregnant. I think you made me take one. Right, I was gonna say that's by design. I think the only photograph. You took it.

I took it in front of my house because you dropped Dylan off when it was time to go give birth to Roman at my house and I made you take a picture and you're still mad about it. I think I ripped it up. I'm sure I have the negative somewhere, but you know me, I've probably lost it. Okay, here's the thing. So my oldest is going to be 24.

I remember that's when like the camcorders were kind of, you know, like it was a big deal to have one. And I remember people, my contemporaries, recording the birth, and then they'd want to show it to you. And I was just like, that's fucked up. Like, no, I don't want to see that. I don't want to see my own. I don't want to see yours.

That's private. Fast forward this long, and now we're paying people to do it? I just think we're over-sharing. Nobody wants to be in your Vagene when you're having a baby. Nobody wants to hear the uh, uh, uh. Nobody wants to do any of that.

Yeah, and here's the thing. I mean, sometimes less documentation is better. I'll tell you what I've had it with. It's fucking you and me. I open up my phone and we're on TikTok and then we're on Twitter and then we're on Instagram, YouTube. I mean, enough. Enough already.

I know. I hate us half the time. I hate us. You know, I always, I'm so quick to make a snarky comment about somebody that over posts. And then I have to realize I'm a horrible offender. You can't wake up in bed and not see our faces. And I'm like, that's hypocrisy right there. And in a masterclass of hypocrisy, we have quote unquote, hired a film crew and an editing

crew and a posting crew. But I feel like that's different. It's a fucking job. It's a job. It's a service to the patriots. It's a public service. And all the fucking eagles in North America. That's right. And the flag, for fuck's sake. Yeah.

We're taking back the word patriot. The birds. I mean, we're taking back our country. What does an eagle say, Pumps? All right. What's next, Kylie? I was going to tell you back when I was freelance videography, I got asked to do multiple bursts, which I always said no. But I also got asked to do a funeral.

And I said yes. I've been to a funeral that they were recording. And I kind of was like, what are you record? Who's going to watch this? When is the appropriate time to roll this on the one year? Yeah, here's here's what? You know like let's just say you know somebody we know dies and then you come over And I'm like we're gonna watch an NBA game like the NBA Finals or something like hey We got an hour before the game starts. Do y'all want to watch Joe Blow's funeral to kill some time? No, I have it right

here. It's an on an old VHS tape. No, I just don't. I don't know when you would ever watch that again. I think it's I think there's just a lot of over documenting. Right. But I I probably shouldn't speak to this issue because I'm a horrible historian. There would not be one picture of my third child unless the iPhone had been invented. It just never occurred to me to take this picture. I was just too busy. I was swamped. I'm a terrible historian.

Baby books empty. I think most of my kids' little kids' photos, you took them. I took them. When your kids are doing some sort of school project, they have to text me to get photographs of themselves as toddlers because I'm the one that has those. Right. Pumps vacation season is officially in full swing.

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I think it's really good that you're tending to your under boob area. You got to do it. You have to. All right. Listen up, listener. Lume's Starter Pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant, cream tube deodorant, two free products of your choice, like the mini body wash and deodorant wipes, and free shipping. As a special offer for our listeners, new customers get 15% off all Lumie products with

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I mean, I'm going to say had it. I recently had some house guests, so my parents... For an extended period. My parents' house burned down, like to the ground. And my parents have a African gray parrot and a doodle named Siri. African gray parrot's name is Crackers. So my parents moved into my guest bedroom with Crackers, the African gray parrot who I believe is 28 years old and she's gonna live to to 80, which is another story entirely. And Siri who's adorable. The only problem with the dog Siri is your watch and your phone thinks that it's talking to you all the time. Siri, come here. And

then your watch responds. Did they do that on purpose or was it an accident? They adopted, look, my phone's right now, it's just doing it. When they adopted Siri, she already had that name. Gotcha. They didn't rename her, because as we established in multiple episodes ago, that only a sociopath or Kylie would do that. So it's fine for a few days, because my guest bedroom

has its own ensuite bathroom. It's upstairs at the end of the hallway. The situation with crackers is that my parents each and every day would leave the house and they were very easy house guests. They did their own thing. They didn't really impose on us very much. But when you have a bird that lives in your house, 24 seven, 365, this African gray makes a lot of noise. And the species African gray can mimic sounds and voices exactly, and it's a part of their survival out in the wild. So you would hear stuff like

a Coke can opening over and over and over. One morning around 6 a.m. I wake up super early, so I was already up. I heard the find my iPhone ping for about an hour and a half straight. I would hear the birds say, Linda, Linda, in exactly my father's voice, where I thought he was at home. And then I would hear this, Rick, Rick, and it was Linda's voice to a T. And then it would make all of these other, and so when you walk upstairs,

it's like one of my son's room, then the other son's room, and then there's that guest bedroom. So I mean, and my house is kind of a modern open. So it just ricocheted downstairs. You could hear crackers 24 seven, 365. It was wild. I lived with a bird, a talking bird.

Yeah, the opens, I mean, like it's unbelievable. Like she can ring like a phone is that ping my iPhone thing. I mean, that was wild. And then she would kind of do these conversations like, uh huh. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Okay. All right. Bye. Exactly. My dad's voice. It's a, you hear all this shit. I'd be like downstairs watching TV and then I would just hear it all. And I have to say it kind of drove me crazy there for a little bit. And then now they're gone. My parents have bought a new house and they're all moved in and they're settled. Everybody's fine. My parents are fine. The animals are fine. Crackers is fine. And then

when Crackers was gone, I was like, God, that was kind of like, it was just, I hated it when she was there. But then when she was gone, I was like, it was kind of interesting. was just I hated it when she was there. But then she was kind of like, it was kind of interesting. Well, it's such a trip. Yeah, it was a trip. But like the Coke can, it was like, and it's that of the aluminum can. And I mean, it's perfection where you think I asked my sons, I'm like, when you were upstairs, what would you think? He said, I freak out because I'd hear papa.

And then I go into their room and they weren't there. And then I realized it was the bird and hear Coke cans opening. And I'd realize it was the bird. I'd hear, Coke can's opening. And I'd be like, is somebody in my room opening up a Coke can? Well, it was the bird. That's crazy. That's amazing that they can do that. Yeah. I love that, the Surrey situation. With the dog, Surrey. Surrey is Tom Cruise's daughter. I know, I've always called it Surrey, but you know what I'm talking about. Yeah. But yeah, the crackers thing. It's so interesting because that's very rare. Yeah. So in both instances, you know, it's like there's crackers pings like an iPhone. And then if I wanted in Siri, I love the dog. She's super cute doodle. And she has these like super long,

exaggerated eyelashes that I was obsessed with. Be like, Siri, come here. Hey, Siri, come here. And then my watch is like talking back to me or the phone's talking back to me. Yeah. Yeah, it's kind of a trip. Yeah. So I'm going to say had it. I love you, mom.

I know you listen to the podcast, but that fucking bird is just too much. All right. Had it or hit it, the phrase boys will be boys. Had it. I have boys will be boys. Had it. I have just absolutely had it. That is just a way to justify toxic behavior. It's all that is. It is a, and you always hear people that ascribe to quote unquote, traditional

family values say that because it's, it's all of that lives in the same place. That's the Melania saying about Trump when he said you can grab him by the pussy. That's her saying, oh, that's just locker room talk. So yeah, I mean, I've absolutely had it with that. Had it. I think it's an excuse for bad behavior. It's misogyny, it's sexism, and it's implying that what they're doing, you have to excuse it because they're just boys will be boys. I just fucking hate it. Hate. Had it, had it, had it.

Yeah, had it. All right. Had it or hit it. Gentle parenting. Okay, here's the thing. However you, being a parent is incredibly hard and however you have to do it, you have to do it for you. The problem with, like, there's a fine line with this, but I'm perceiving, I'm going

to answer this based on what I perceive gentle parenting is people that don't have very firm boundaries with their children. And children whose parents do not have firm boundaries with them are very dysfunctional, anxiety-ridden adults. And so I think the best approach to parenting, in my opinion, is constantly realizing that their childhood is temporary. Enjoy it, have the fun childish moments, but every chance you can get, prepare them to be autonomous adults.

See, in my mind, gentle parenting is that parent that says, we don't ever say no to our child, and you see them at restaurants, and they act horrible. So my immediate thing is, had it. Just because your child's behavior should not be my problem, ever. My child's behavior is my problem, but not yours. And I just, and I could be wrong, because I'm not really familiar with the general,

what that means, because my kids are older. But I would just say when your child's behavior becomes my problem in a public setting, then I have a problem with it. I agree. And I just think that at the end of the day, parenting, you have love. But it's training these people to, at some point, be autonomous individuals.

And sometimes over-parenting, not sometimes, the majority of the time, over-parenting, over-involvement by parents, not drawing boundaries with your kids, causes debilitating anxiety in young adults. And they have a very hard time functioning outside of the family unit. And I just see like, general parenting, over-parenting.

You see what the end result is, and that's why you have a Gen Z right now that has anxiety off the chart that's never been recorded to the levels that it is right now. And it's not the kids' fault, it's the parents. Now, it's always the parents. Because when you do for your kids

what they can do for themselves, it sends your kids a message that you think they're incompetent and incapable of doing it. I remember when my kids were little, it sends your kids a message that you think they're incompetent and incapable of doing it. I remember when my kids were little, it was hard to envision that they would ever be adults. Right. I mean, so it was over-babying, over-mother.

My deal was more of, I never wanted them to experience hurt or failure. And then I realized that that's backing them up. Yeah, but I would always get on my kids' ass if they misbehaved or were disrespectful or stuff like that. I didn't ever, I mean, Emily would throw up in restaurants, but she was two and wasn't a whole lot I could do. Right. But yeah, I over-parented out of,

I never wanted their feelings to be hurt. And I realized that's a fucking mindfuck. Well, and it's failing them. That is absolutely failing them because truly life is about managing suffering. Every single day there are components of suffering that we all experience. Rejection, hurt feelings, blah, blah. How do you manage that? Do you give everything a 10? Is everything you react to a full-blown 10 and freak out? then you haven't been prepped enough to handle and mitigate life.

Right. And so I think that stuff is a real myopic focus on your children being children their whole lives and not envisioning that I have a job and a duty and a role here to prep them to be functioning adults that are going to have disappointment, they're going to have joy, they're going to have success, they're going to have failure. That is the human experience. Nobody is getting around any of that. Not one fucking person on this planet is getting around those things.

Everybody's going to have it. We're going to feel bad emotions, good emotions, all the emotions. Jealousy, envy, success, you know, accomplishment, and they're all fleeting, right? Every single one of them are fleeting and that's the one thing I always tell my kids when they're really suffering from something like emotionally that might happen or some sense of failure that they have. I always say this is how you feel now and it's so important that you feel it. thing, like emotionally that might happen or some sense of failure that they have, I always say this is how you feel now and it's so important that you feel it, but it's not

going to be this intense one week from now. And when you feel joy, it's so great to feel this now and it's important that you feel it but it's not going to feel this great a week from now. I firmly believe it's every bit as important to feel the bad as it is to feel the good. Now I think you're right. I think if you don't allow people to feel bad and then they go out and they make very superficial relationships their whole life because they haven't ever been able to live in honesty and sometimes honesty is very uncomfortable, but that's fucking life. And

that's the best way to learn how to manage suffering. Stay tuned for more in my Ted talk on the post show. Listen, I used to be the most fucked up person in the world and still am, but these are the things I figured out through going through all of the trials and tribulations of Josh's addiction. All right, we will see you next Tuesday or Thursday or both.