I've Had It - You’re Not a Pisces, You’re a Schmuck

Episode Date: November 15, 2022

Yack mouths ruined a historic tennis match for Jennifer while Pumps recalls a 25-old tarot card warning she should have heeded. Sounds like Mercury was in retrograde.  Subscribe to our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/IveHadItPodcast Follow Us: I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps Special Guest:Kate Wolff - @thekatewolff

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Additional Terms Apply. Do the clap. One, two, three. One, two, three. Remember, you have to do it. That's next. Okay. I have a system.

One, two, three. Send her to fucking Hollywood. How about Las Vegas? I could have my own show, a clap-o-show. I could clap and wear pasties. You could wait. What? What's going on?

Pumps, what have you had it with this week? You know, I've just been so tickled pink with my life this week. That's off topic. What is as you can see from our television, the name of our podcast is I've had it. So allow me to get you to it for us yet again. I know. Okay. Let me tell you what I've had it with. I've had it with Yak Mouth's sitting near you at a sporting event. 1 million percent agree. It's ridiculous. So recently, Josh and I went to London to see Roger Federer played doubles with Rafa Nadal and Roger Federer's last professional tennis match of his iconic legendary tennis career. So we're sitting there at the O2 Arena in London, Pact House, and these Yak-Mouth Americans are sitting behind us from North Carolina. Of course, they were American. And this guy has to narrate, oh, God, everything he has to talk, non-stop.

And he's not like when Josh and I would talk, we would lean and whisper. Right. Because you're kind of supposed to be quiet at tennis. I had awareness about the people around me and about their feelings and that they had paid a lot of money and traveled a long way. But these fuckers sitting behind me from North Carolina did not match ends and then all of a sudden it's this amazing ceremony where Roger starts bawling. Rafa is completely a basket case.

He's bawling. That is so sweet. It's precious. Josh Welch is not slinging ugly cry bawling. And I can't enjoy any of it hardly because of these God, damn, Yakmau sitting behind me. Nothing worse than a Yakmau. Just a non-stop horrible content narration. And I mean, I'm just furious about it. stop horrible content narration.

And I mean, I'm just furious about it. And I just, I don't understand why people don't take into account the feelings of those around them. The only thing I will say is, is there any chance because you know, I'm a horribly loud talker. And so when I think I'm not, you think you're a f- an offender? I'm sure I'm an offender. There's no doubt about it.

I'm part of the problem. Yeah, but I wouldn't do it in a deal like that. But I just wonder if they didn't realize how loud they were. Because I don't realize how loud I am. I have like camera being pulled out of a film right now thinking back to going to movies with you and doing things with you. And I think you are a part of the problem.

I am. I think though it's because I just don't understand how loud I am. I hate to want to help you on that story. But that looks football game. If he doesn't return the kick and let he fair catches, people will bitch about, why didn't you? Luke, you should have gotten that ball.

That, that, that, that. And I'm like, his fucking mother is sitting right here. I think I've seen some of the ugliest behavior of humanity pertaining to children's sports and then just the delusions that these parents have, a kid that's nowhere near has the physique of a D1 athlete because you would know by looking 100%.

This brings me to something that I don't know if this is this is a topic I'm just going to say that I've totally kind of had it with. Okay. It can be fun, but when people take it too seriously, it's incredibly annoying. And it is just number one astrological signs. A number two, everybody on Instagram talking about mercury being in retrograde. I don't even know what that means. A lot of people I follow on Instagram are like, oh my god, my life's amassed this week. I forgot to return an email.

I lost my keys. I forgot to feed my dog. So I Google it. What does mercury in retrograde mean? Because I had never fucking heard of it. I heard the term. What. What does mercury in retrograde mean? Because I'd never fucking heard of it. I heard the term. What do you think mercury in retrograde is? Just an excuse for bad behavior, it sounds like.

But what do you think mercury is? Okay, mercury is a planet. Nailed it. And so it's, I don't know what retrograde means in terms of planets. Basically, it's an optical illusion. So all the planet circle around the sun. And when mercury is in retrograde,

it appears from the Earth's vantage point that it stops moving, but it actually doesn't. It's an optical illusion. So basically, fucking nothing is happening. It's happening differently. Nothing. I'm a Leo. Okay, okay.

And I just hit the Google. Okay. And. I'm a Leo. Okay. Okay. And I just hit the Google. Okay. And I'm going to go through positive traits and negative traits of Leo's. And then I'll tell you a few of them. We're going to go through your. Okay.

Positive traits of Leo's. Okay. Enthusiastic. 50-50. I was going to say, I don't know that I would say always. Determined? Yes. Yes. Ambitious? Yes. Yes. Creative? Yes. Yes. Generous? Yes. Dynamic? Yes. You betcha. Loyal? Yes. Yes. Romantic? No. No, absolutely not decisive. Fuck yes. Absolutely. Warm-hearted

Confident. Yes. Yes. Charismatic. Yes. Yes. Vane. Yes. Ecotistical. Yes. Childish. No. 100%. I don't think your childish at all. Look at what we're doing right now. Overbearing 100% stubborn, for sure. Statisticing totally. I'm totally pretentious and shallow. Autocratic? Yeah. You want to be the boss. Okay. Yeah. I'll take it. Ericant, afraid so. Cockey probably. Yeah. Yeah. 100% dominating.

No, yeah. So actually, this is pretty good anecdotal evidence. Pretty spot on. I am spot on for a Leo. Right. That's kind of weird. Shit. Okay, let's go to yours.

Okay, Aquarius. Okay. Positive traits. Okay. Intellectual. I'm not a huge Detroit. Not a Roi. Independent.

Yes. Yes. Tolerant? Yes. Yes. Idealistic? No. Humanitarian? No. No. Absolutely not. Friendly? Yeah. Social? I mean, I can't be. It's not my kind of love it. Creative? No. I mean, I can be. That's my kind of love it. Creative. No. Unique.

Yes. Humorous. Yes. Egalitarian. I don't, I need a definition on that. What do you think it is? I have no idea. Like,

ruled by ego maybe? Egalitarian. Surely you've been to law school for a while. No, I've heard the word that you've been to. I've not asked the barght him, oh you didn't the first time did you? No, I didn't. Was it two timer? Two timer. We could have petty to your foot.

I thought we'll wear it with a badge of honor. That's right. Innovative. No. Okay. Negative traits. Accentric. Yes. Yes. Unpredictable. You know what's going to happen emotionally detached. 110%. If I can put it in the bank, start charging interest. Nailed it. A period. Negative traits emotionally detached. Ding ding ding. Calculating. No. Contradictory.

No. Distant. No. Restless. No. Chaotic. Yes. 1000%.

Yeah. Okay, so. I mean, I'm spot on. You're spot on. But I think I have heard that since I'm one day before the switch, like I'm on the cast. I've just heard that thing. You're on the cast.

That's just the biggest part. I didn't say I'm from that. I'm just looking at this from a statistical standpoint. Right. I did used to read when they had newspapers. I used to read my horoscope. So you probably read Dear Abbey too, didn't you? I did.

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm, yeah. Anyway, think about statistically how it would have to go down for everybody that's ever been born on February 18th from the beginning of our species and tell now to all have the same character traits. No, I know. I'm not saying I'm like, wholeheartedly believe it, but I'm just saying it's interesting.

I find it interesting. Okay, so it's rumored that J. Low has fired back up dancers, strictly on their astrological signs. Apparently she doesn't get along with Virgos, a star sign shared by her ex has been Mark Anthony. She asked all the dancers to raise their hands if they're Virgos. She looked at them and said, thanks so much for coming and let them all go. People who cited Virgos as being highly uncoachable. I will say if you're J.L.A. you can do whatever the fuck you want.

Some people do or don't date or marry others based on their signs. Some people turn down renters applications and quit their jobs because of horoscopes. Also known as astrology, discrimination, something that apparently again would keep hitting this theme you guys, no oversight. And then we also have zodiac shaming. I don't even know what that is, refresh. Refresh me. What part do you don't know?

What zodiac shaming? Is that zodiac horse goat? Is that the same? I don't know what that is zodiac horoscope? Is that the same? I don't know what that is. Should we the zodiac killer? I know was a killer based on zodiac signs, but is our zodiac in horoscope signs the same? Okay. Okay. So zodiac shaming people are like could shame you like, oh god, he's just a Pisces. People are like could shame you like oh God. He's just a Pisces What a fucking asshole all Pisces are assholes. I think I've heard that before like what we broke out because he's a

Gemini or whatever or and then some people use There's Odeak or their astrological sign to to justify naughty behavior Like people could blame their sex addiction on their sign people could blame blame cheating on their sign. What are the signs for that? I mean, the sex addiction sign. We're gonna have a guest soon, but we're gonna ask her, falling out with friends, emails getting lost. And people, again, people actually blame their flights being delayed on Mercury and retrograde.

I think to say where the stars were when you were born could help you justify your behavior or cause you to misflights or you didn't feed your dog. I think maybe people need to come to grips if maybe they're just kind of fucked up. Right. I tend to agree. I also think that you just have to be accountable. Like, I fucked up. I didn't feel my dog has nothing to do with my sign, but I still think you can have fun with it. I do think you can have fun with it. I think it's fun.

We have in the past, when we've gone on girl strips, we've had our terror cards read. I fucking know. And it was totally fun. Have I told you this before, before I got married, was in Washington, and New Orleans with my ex-husband and I got my tear cards red and so did he. We both did together like one right after the other. We're standing there. Are you serious? And I got I can't remember the card but it was like I got a black

mark for lab like run basically was the card and we were together and guess what? My life would have been so much easier. And you ran right into him. I should have run now if I would have just listened to that. To the tarot card. To the tarot card. No, thank you. Well, I think we need to dig deeper into this. And we have a guest today. And she has a podcast called Invasion Privacy, and her name is Kate. And she is a tarot card reader, a comedian. I've been cooking, trying to be more of a housewife. It's hard, especially when you look up recipes online.

Have you guys tried to do this recently? It's everyone wanting to be a blog writer. It's not a fucking recipe, right? It's their feelings about the fucking meal. I look up how to make Apple Crisp, you click on it and it's a woman being like, when I think of Apple Crisp, I think of the orchard I was walking in

10 years ago with my lover, rubbing his back hair with my fingers as the apples squished below us. Now preheat your oven to 400 degrees. You're like, wow, I was masturbating. I thought, I forgot, we were cooking. This is gonna be a ton of fun. So let's welcome Kate, be nice. Hi Kate. Hi Kate.

Hi. Oh, I love it. How are you? I'm good, how are you? Great. So I'm Jennifer and this is Angie. Hello. Her nickname is Pumps.

So if you hear me switch from like Angie to Pumps, but we want to thank you for joining us today and we have been talking a little bit before you came on about our signs. I'm a Leo. And Pumps isn't a curious. And we did a quick little Google search of positively O-Trates and negatively O-Trates.

I pretty much had all of them. She was like 98 percent. And I'm the biggest naysayer about astrological signs. You know, I do fully believe in astrology. You believe in it. You think that has a factor on who we are and why we are the way we are. Yes, but I also think that we're all so unique that it's hard at the same time to try to put us

into categories with it. But I do think it's usually accurate and there's a science to it. So, and I'm very out there, you know. I like it. So what's an iris sign traits? A fiery stubborn. Yeah, and I am very fiery.

I may not see it right now. I've done a lot of work. I love it. I love it to calm the fire, you know. I mean, I can just something can just set me off. And I am just like, oh my God, and you really just have to learning how to manage, you know, the emotions that I run, a muck inside of us is truly one of the long term life

things that you never quite nail. And you're in the right place because you've just hit your amongst friends on this deal. I always have to tell myself like nobody gives a ship at you. Like why are you holding everybody hostage on something that really doesn't fucking matter to anyone, but you and it has nothing to do with anybody else. Right. You know, and that's a hard one because especially when you're a single parent, you think everything, you know, you're authority blah blah blah blah. Right. Right. Right. And I think boundaries are huge. And a lot of us are finally learning how to set positive boundaries. I have a slow learner. I have a slow learner. I have a slow learner. It is a character defect.

No boundary. It's so hard. We're not taught in our society. We're learning because that self-love is learning how to say no so you can replenish and feed yourself and not living out of obligation, right? That's really hard. That's the tough one. Well, you can, perhaps why don't you share with her some of your lack of boundaries,

things that you have a hard time drawing a boundary with. See if she has any insight. I want to meet the one, like I totally will pee with the door open. I don't care who's in there. I mean, the one, like I totally will pee with the door open. I don't care who's in there. I'm not modest. At my office where there's men in here as well, she just goes and sits down and pee. And I'm an interior designer.

And my interior design from, and Javier, who works at Front Desk walks by, he cannot see me on the bathroom. I've never done it when he was like, I shut one. He's here. No, I know, but he wasn't like a round. I've never done it when he was like, I shut one, he's here. No, I know, but he wasn't like a rant. I did it with Nilly. But sometimes I think you have to talk when you're on the potty if you're in a hurry.

Okay, so go on. Oh gosh. I have a horrible time. Like I just avoid getting into a conversation with someone versus having to set the boundary like, okay, I've heard enough. Like I'd rather just avoid the whole thing than like my eyes start rolling back in my head

instead of just saying, okay, that's fine. That's all right. Tell her about the group we ran for your 22 year old son. Oh, this, I just don't even know if this is, do you have kids? Yeah, I have a 16 year old boy. Okay, so I have a 22 year old son, and he's at college and his fraternity, the moms all have

a group meeting, like needing to know stuff like what's the update on where they're living, what do you have to buy for where they're living, do they have freezers, you know, all that shit. So I am on the group me and Jennifer is just like cannot wrap her head around it. Because he's not a minor. He's trying to do it to you. I know. I don't, I think what I would do if I were in the group me, all the parents would see is Jennifer has left this group. I want to talk about the tarot cards that you do. I love tarot cards.

It could have been here. I'm ready to do this. You got the reading. Me first, me first. OK, OK, do pumps first. Do pumps first. OK. So I'm going to do three reading. Me first, me first. Okay, okay, do pumps first, do pumps first. Okay, so I'm gonna do three cards to start. Okay, and then if we wanna go deeper, I can pull more.

Okay, so you got three really powerful major arcana cards, there were verse, which means there's some resistance of your power, so we'll get into it. Okay, tell me what resistance in my power means first. I've got to put my glasses on. So, okay, so this is the Empress. Can you see it? Oh my God, I'm an Empress.

So the Empress is all about art and femininity. And it's saying sometimes we get so stuck in what we need to create and produce, and I'm not doing enough instead of remembering that you're the art. And boundaries actually come into this because when you're allowed to say no to the things that are pulling on you in a way that doesn't feel good, remember to feed yourself as the art. As the master.

The only time I feel like art is when I get better talks or filler. And I know I'm the art then. But I mean that's growth for me now. Growing into my femininity. Move over, move over Mona Lisa. Okay, let's get to your next card though. Okay. King of Cops were worst.

So for King of Cops, with the masculine coming through, it's very like CEO energy of you don't care what people think of you as much because you're running your stuff. So you don't need to worry as much of, do they like me? And it's learning how to ride the emotions that we were talking about. And then we have King of Sores reversed. And you are a powerful truth speaker.

I think you're meant to get to an even deeper place of what your truth is. Maybe sharing more of your vulnerabilities, your limitations, but not being scared to really speak your truth. You ready for your terror rating now? Yeah, okay. So why? These are fun. So the first one, the hermit reversed.

The hermit. You're kind of a hermit. And this hermit card looks a little scarier than most hermit reversed. The hermit. You're kind of a hermit. And this hermit card looks a little scarier than most hermit cards, but this is saying it is good to go within. I don't know if you have some introverted ways, but it's saying this is a good thing. You often need space to reflect on what's going on and just to reach your anchor, your center. Do you ever meditate? No. I mean, the card is spot on in the sense that I'm extroverted,

but when I'm off or my desire is to be alone, right? And specifically, yeah, I love my kids, but I have to have my time with my dogs. But they're my constant companions. And I'll get to the next card because it's linked to it. The star reversed. Okay. This is about getting into your intuition and your deepest truth, that guidance of who you truly are. There's this deep push and I believe you're definitely

being supported by the other side. I don't know how much you believe in that kind of stuff. I don't. But it's. Thank you for your honor. No, I just, I just, I don't. I think an extraordinary claim requires extraordinary evidence. I'm a very reality-based person. And I believe in the moments we have now carry the biggest amount of value for

me, the known. That is the most spiritual for me, or these moments talking to you right now, being with her moments with my dogs, with my children, that the known is the one thing that's tangible that I can embrace more spiritually than the unknown. Well, amen to that. But I do believe that there is more evidence that's coming out each month. I mean, I was talking about enlightened aliens for years. People thinking I'm crazy talking about it on stage. Right.

And then the Pentagon finally released. Right. Yes. You know, so I think that's some shit, isn't it? That is a shit. I want to know. Right. Absolutely. I mean, that's the shit. Yes.? And that's the shit I want to know. Right, absolutely.

I mean, that's the shit. Yes, like that's the shit we need to know. Seems like the pen and gone in the Navy. That's pretty sure you have some extraordinary evidence. You talk about meditation. If I were to sit and invite feelings in, I would just be like, oh my God, this is so dumb. I couldn't do it.

I appreciate people that can do it. But I just, it's not who I am. I would be inauthentic to who I am. I'm always. I think listening to yourself is beautiful. You know what's right for you. And that's a star card too. Is you're the only one who knows your inner truth.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I get the sense that if there is a party situation and there's a creepy person in the room, you're gonna spot it. Oh, she will. She will spot them out immediately.

She wouldn't be at the party. And that's like she would be at the party because she's on her her own. But if she wasn't at the party, she would immediately find the nut jobs. I do the last part. I do that, but I marry the nut jobs. I do the last card. I do that, but I marry the nut jobs. That's what my mom did too.

She can go on. Well, love and romance is the quickest way to... It reflects our deepest wounds that are often hidden. It does. So we find ourselves in situations that are reflecting parts of ourselves that we haven't seen or don't understand yet. So all right, last card, eight of pentacles.

This is about continuing the hard work. It's acknowledging how hard you work and it's saying you are strong, keep going, you're building something pretty deep. And I don't think everyone maybe knows the depth of your mission. You don't know what to say and what you wanna bring in. But this is saying keep going. Write this down.

You don't know the depths of my mission. You're really creating something and you have this vision to shift things in a certain way. And I just wanna say say, keep going. Is there a professional ethical code for tear cards? Because you never hear someone say, you're going to die tomorrow. Like if something really terrible is going to happen to you, not say it. Do you not, do you just ignore it? You know, one time I knew a woman was getting cheated on in the cards and it was her bachelor

at party. And that was a tough one. That was a real tough one. Did you tell her? Wait, wait, so many questions. So you lay the scales cards out and you can surmise from the cards that he's from the cards that he's gonna cheat on her at his bachelor party. She got the three of swords and it's like three swords going through a heart and it means heartbreak that needs to be processed or it might be around the corner. We joke around that if there was an island and it had the each of our baby deadies on it with red flags and physical red flags all around it in

sharks swirpling it. We would strip down and swim as fast as we could to the red flags absolutely and popped out children immediately. Right. That caution to the wind. That that was how fucking crazy and I'm not saying we've got it together right now Kate because it's better but that's how fucking crazy we were in our 20s. So we've had evolved a little bit. A little bit. But yeah, no, it's as bad as it gets in the Red Flag Department over here. I'm just going to tell you, for sure, I think astrology is bullshit. 1,000%.

If astrology makes you happy and reading your horoscope makes you happy, I think that's great. I do get irritated about people blaming and excusing bad behavior. My thing is, if it works for you with the stuff, with the beings, and then for some people it's Christianity, for some people it's Buddhism, that's great. For me, it just, it doesn't work. And you never know also what could happen. Right.

You don't. Exactly. And we could reach out and be like. I think I could be telling them my shoulder. And I'm going to be like, Kate, here's the deal. Never say never. When we open our podcast, we talk about what we've had it with this week. And the one thing I've had it with is I went to watch a tennis match and these fuckers from North Carolina are sitting behind me. And they're just yak yak mouse nonstop as you

Perform comedy. Do you have yak mouse? You know while you're full blown in a comedy routine and people are just talking Sometimes I'm pretty good at shutting down hecklers in that situation. I have the mic. Yes, right Oh, good for you like what do you say? I'm pretty good at making them regret that. It doesn't usually happen with me. Also with my psychic abilities on stage. If I try not to use them while I'm a mic, I'm sure not above. Because you know, it could be a weird twist.

But if I need to and someone's messing with me, I can tune right into the other side in that moment because I'm triggered and say their biggest wound or embarrassment. So I usually can shut that down. If someone's disrespecting me, I'm put in a place where I now can feel into your wound for whatever reason.

And I want to say the thing that will hurt the person the most. Yeah. So they're disrespecting me and I have a mic. I'm supposed to be getting attention and you're gonna disrespect me. It brings out my rage and then I'm somehow able to tune in through my rage. Because if someone's being that disrespectful, they're showing their colors.

Right. You know, I feel like there are instances where people really show who they are. And if they're doing that and they're with a girl that they're trying to impress, oh, you're done. I'm going to tell that girl to never let your penis and her vagina or that small vagina approval on it. You know, even if she does, she's going to remember me saying like, he's not the one

move on, I'll pick a new guy in the audience. So I usually, you know, in that kind of pressure cooker, can win those situations. I love it. Well, Kate, thank you so much for the tarot card reading. Yes, you're welcome. And, you know, if I ever get a tap, tap, tap, or anything crazy, I'm gonna call you. Aliens in your backyard. I need. I

welcome you to here. No, you will be my very first phone call. Yeah. Thank you so much. Thank you. It's so fun. Yeah. So fun meeting you both. Thank you. Thanks so much. Bye. Bye. She's so fun. Yeah. That was really fun. It's fun. I've noticed a theme that's starting to take hold and take shape in these podcasts. So it starts off with some grievance that we have. Totally. I've noticed that we've had it with. We're talking assholes about it, the national holiday. And then fall in love with that.

Fall in love with that. Fall in love with it. Yes. Then we scout it out. We want to get to the bottom of it. And then we meet the people, we confront the grievance, and then we evolve. Right. Growth is happening on this podcast. Yes.

But I will say, and you can put it on my fucking tombstone. Mercury in retrograde is bullshit. Okay. I'll take that down. Okay. Despite me almost scoring 100% on my Leo personality chart, I still think that's bullshit. However, her stuff with tarot cards and her positivity and kind of like channeling her energy, I'm totally in on, I think it's super cool. I do too. She believes that she can help people. I love it.

And I think it's awesome. I do too. Now she was great. We have like totally flipped. Like I'm not miss everything. Uh huh. I know it's kind of like we're not as smart as we think we are. 100% of us should. Also like we're not as smart as we think we are. 100% for sure.

Also, like we've had it and then we get it. We get it. One question. What about the Burning Man episode? Did you guys know that put it on my tombstone? That's what I'm never going to ever, ever, ever get. It's just not possible. She boycotted Burning Man and she thinks mercury in retrograde

Great a flaming pile of horses, right? Okay, let's wonder. We're gonna see people What what are we gonna see people? I Don't know. Oh my god you guys Oh my God, you guys. What are we talking about? What are we talking about? T.U. What are we gonna see people, like dead people? Oh my God.

My ears hurt, Terry. Oh. I'm so sorry. See you next Tuesday. I'm not even gonna say it. I know you're mad. I did not know what we were doing. Sorry, I teed it up.

I know, but I'm thinking about how bad my ears are. I know, I'm just not. Take off your fucking headphones then. The podcast is over. Okay. We're in the straw. you