James Bonding - Goldfinger with Alie and Georgia

Episode Date: November 2, 2022

Alie and Georgia comes on the podcast to talk about the controversy they found in Goldfinger! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Now entering Nerdist.com Matt Matt and Matt Matt Matt and Matt Matt I think

I think you were right and I was wrong I think it was good though just away Yeah Matt and Matt Matt Matt Yeah

Yeah that's all you need I wish it were just a little more shrill Can you work on that Amplified in your headphones We can try What am I two on this Thank you

What am I two? You should go up Yeah I can't hear a thing Okay Perfect Right there? There. All good?

Yeah. Right. Perfect. I love it. All right. Now there are levels are set. Welcome to the fifth episode. I think so.

Yeah. Third James Bond film. The third James Bond film in the series, the fifth one we're doing, our guests today, all the way from the Scripps Networks. Allie Ward, Georgia, Hartsock. Welcome, guys. Hi. Hi. You guys are so.

You guys are great. Thank you. Do your cocktail things. You guys go on adventures and then make inspired parties about it. Yeah, fellow drunk historians. Yay. That's right. Yeah.

That's right. Guys, I have not laid down a drunk history yet. Matt, you'd be good at it. You should. I would pontificate. I wanted to do the molasses story, but they got somebody before me. I was like, fuck. The Boston molasses spill.

It's my favorite story. I don't remember that. Oh, they might have never actually made it, but they did do. They did film it. I talked to Mahoney about it. Anyway, that's some inside information. Yeah. I think I'm putting some pieces together.

Yeah. Someone got cut. Yeah. I know that happened, but I... Really? Now I'm starting to put it together. Yeah. Anyway.

Like, what could you do wrong on drunk history? Like, every... Maybe you were... Maybe you did right. He did right. That's the problem. Yeah, it was too accurate. Syntax was perfect the entire time.

He was driving. And not completely within the law. Welcome to the drunk history podcast. Yeah. We were talking about drunk history. Okay. Guys, Goldfinger. you guys, to my knowledge, have never seen a James Bond movie.

Nope. I really love this because I was against it already in so many ways. But then when you wanted us to do this, I was like, well, this is a great reason for me to watch it. There's like a purpose instead of just me sitting around watching, you know, my feminism die a little bit inside. I had never watched. I was like, what's the deal with James Bond? I didn't know. I was like, I know people watch it and there's gadgets, but I didn't quite know what the deal was.

and I had a pretty strong reaction to it. I feel like James Bond is one of those things where like if your dad, like football, if your dad didn't watch football when you were a kid, you have no point of reference for it. The same thing with James Bond. Also, if your dad watched James Bond, though, your mom was like in a closet bound and dead.

You know what even? And then he moved on to the next. Like, I can't. I had a lot of reactions to this. This is a really, I'm so excited about this situation. It's going to be a unique perspective. I'm glad because we haven't had anybody that has no prior experience.

with James Bond. Yeah, you're our first. Because we do not condone or, well, it depends on the movie, because they're not like this anymore. So this is a bit of a period piece. What? Are they?

Like, how are they not like this? They are a little bit like this. How are they not like this? They're not like this in that. Well, he has a wife and kids now. Yeah, he's settled down. He did get married. He used his condo.

He got married. There's like a tacit acknowledgement that Bond can be much more of a chauvinist. Now, in these current ones, it's more so relegated to the bad guys. If that makes sense. You know, it's not saying that the movie doesn't involve some misogyny or that sort of thing, but it's not trumpeted as like, we're cool with this, right?

You know, it's usually as a plot point that... Well, it, but also still to this day, the first girly fucks in the movie dies immediately. Yeah, what the? And then he moves on. He never had sex with her in Casino Royale. Wait, you mean he always fuck someone and then she dies? Almost, yeah, almost every time. Are you serious?

And he's just fine. Isn't he Scott? I think he's a, you guys, he's one as a narcissist, Roe. Oh, yeah. He's a horrible person, especially from the novels, because the author was pretty much awful. He's an awful misogynist. So, wait a minute. I love Ellie's reaction.

We just skipped over the fact that, like, oh, yeah, he fucks a chick and the beginning of the first act, she dies, and he moves on without any counseling. Correct. Oh, yeah. All the time? This guy's a psychopath. His counseling is vodka. That's his counseling. He's an alcoholic psychopath.

Well, he's also a murderer, so it's not like he's... The problem with the movies is that... They got to be cartoons where that kind of became this thing where that's cool, no big deal. And so the newer movies better explore how flawed this whole world is. But you know what, though? That's irritating because, and I was reading an article, I believe it was on Slate, like a few months ago about... That's pretty massages. Isn't it already?

About cable television anti-heroes and how because you can get away with more, it's exploring the flawed psychology of an anti-hero is kind of like the thing. Breaking Bad and Wire and just whatever. Mad Men, but that doesn't excuse the behavior. It's like, but you guys, it's fucked up. Which is like, but he's still doing terrible things. This is an interesting sort of way to look at it, because I never looked at it like that. The new ones? I see the new ones totally in parallel with these, like the new golden age of cable television.

Yeah? Yeah, because he's, I mean, when Vesper dies, his last line is the bitch is dead, and it's supposed to be that he's just cold-hearted thing. But she did. She did. Double-cross him. I mean, I thought that was a valid line. But the way they play it and the movie's more nuanced and it feels like he's doing it also as a denial. Like, I have to hate her because he loved her so much, which is totally new for Bond.

You wouldn't get that in a Connery one or anything like that. Yeah, but it, but does it excuse his actual behavioral choices? No, so like, like backstory is, is, I feel like backstory is used as a justification of really reprehensible, like psychopathic behavior. Which I'm like, that's not okay. In the very beginning, like one of the first scenes. of Goldfinger, aside from the duck on the head, which can we talk about that? Wow, that's...

I mean, it was a seagull, but go ahead. Whatever. Either way, it's way more obvious than if someone just swam up underwater. You have an amazing point. Wow. Anyway, the first thing... Why take the risk?

He has scuba gear. Waterfell doesn't swim that fast. Unless there's some like little periscope which they did not show, so yeah, that's just... They could have that. Yeah. Anyways, he uses a female human human being as a...

A human shield. I have written in my notes. Woman, tit shaking, then she's in the bath. Did he use her as a human shield question mark? That's in my notes. Did you say tit shield? No, tits were bouncing. Titchaking.

Because the first time we see her, the first woman two minutes in is shaking her tits. And then you're like, oh, she's naked in a bath. Well, whatever. She's as though you don't shake your tits when you're... It's what you do. Well, I'm just saying. And then she uses as a human shield. Like, I wrote the same words.

It'd be weird if she was dressed like a secretary in, like, was doing that. I don't even think, but the thing, he didn't... Does it matter that she's in on it? No, but he didn't even know for sure. I mean, yeah,

he'd see the reflection in the eyes. Yeah. He knows... It's not like... Look, I'm not defending. Believe me. The 25 seconds in, my first note, I wrote down 25 seconds in,

I hate James Bond. That's all... I was like, this is... Well, that was a knee jerk, if nothing else. My first note on this was that I found the folly work at the beginning of this movie

could be bat-shit crazy. Because the sound of the C4 coming out of that tube is the most reprehensible thing I've ever heard committed to audio. I love our first notes tell a lot about it's like so disgusting and it's that but louder

and it's like gross why do you need that sound? So yours is if you hate James Bond yours as you hate the sound of the C4 tube mine is typical like minutia well that's still Bob Simmons in the gun barrel sequence it's not even Sean Connery playing James Bond and I'm like ducks don't move back quick

Did you notice Bob Simmons does a hell of a jump Yeah. Like it's just like a horse. Yeah. Yeah. It's really funny. If you watch Daniel Craig now do the gun barrel thing where, you know, at the very beginning of the movie, it's so much quicker and more calculated than it looks like he would actually die.

Whereas this guy looks like he would get shot mid jump because he really takes a good second to jump. It's like he had the bullet in the gun and he had to use like centrifugal force to jerk it out. The credits also were 45 minutes long. Yeah. And I was like, and tell me after if I'm still watching. That's one thing I just love. What is the point of that? Just the style, the song, it's something you don't get anymore.

It's a throwback to another era. The song actually killed me because, am I the only person that had the words to Moon River in their head? The entire time? Moon River. It's very similar. The whole time. Same thing. But that's not as cool.

You're either steeped in breakfast or Tiffany's or James Bond and you choose a song camp. The two of them making out and I was so into it. They would just be, they would just be so many psychological issues in two people. They would never, they're facing. couldn't get close enough to make out because they both are so afraid of interiors. Holly Gold Lightley. I know. Holly, yeah, that's a Bond name right there. But you're right. Like that's quintessentially male and female, the two most fucked up.

Totally. Yeah. Cinematic archetypes. Yeah. You're like, I'm into that movie. Yeah, let's do it. Can we do? What's the, what's the story? Ship it when you ship it? No, what's that? That's when you're when you see two people and you try to make them. You know, it's like fan fiction. I'm like, that's what I was trying to think of. I would write some hardcore James Bond, Hollygoly. Do you mean like hardcore?

I love it. Yes, hardcore. All right. Holly Gold Lightley is great. It's great. Get up on that. Someone write that. They will.

Someone Photoshop us a gold finger Holly Golightly Breakfast of Tiffany. Also, if that's Connery and Audrey Hepburn, and they work together in what Robin and Marion, they were in a movie together.

Whoa. Yeah. What's a rain man? Yeah, it's just not the first time I'm going to call, doesn't it? I got to go. A couple of, uh, A couple of fun things that this is the first time we see a Bonds Rolex Submariner.

Oh. His what? The Rolex that he's wearing. Okay. Which you can now buy on eBay, the same year Rolex will run you about $68,000. Holy knackerel. Now, there, the, okay, this is the first time we're seeing a completely unrelated cold open, which is completely unrelated. Right, you're right, yeah.

Usually there's a time. there's a tie-in in the pre-credden sequence to the film. This is like... So this little fun adventure we see at the beginning has nothing to do with the vlog. I was wondering, because I realized about six or seven minutes in, I was like, what the fuck is this movie about? And then I literally had to get on Wikipedia and be like, all right, all right,

gold. Some fucking, some gold. Yeah, I was, like, am I missing some important dialogue? Because that's a thing that I think that I didn't understand about, Bond, is that the dialogue and the reasons for things don't really matter. And the whole time I was like, like, if I couldn't hear it or I miss something, I'd rewind it, and then I'd be like, oh, no, no, no, it doesn't matter what anyone is saying. And that woman, that blonde woman, it doesn't matter. She doesn't, she isn't an integral character.

Her name is dink in the movie. Isn't that the worst? Are you talking about the one at the pool? Yeah. Oh, you mean the masseuse? He swats on the butt and says, quote, man talk. Yeah. Like, I think one of my notes was this movie should have been called woman or bad.

And then it's just, I couldn't believe how much fucking fighting. I was like, you guys. Lots of fighting. And really bad, like, really ineffectual fighting, too. Like, people are cockroaches. Like, just kill them and then move on. Yeah, they have families and people who care about them. But this is a heightened world of, I'm not...

I know, but I can't suspend my disbelief. I finally figured out where all those henchmen came from. Yeah, those poor guys. What are you talking about? All of Goldfinger's henchmen. They figured out. They were like Oompa Lumpa's evil cousins. No, they were Chinese.

Oh, in the book, they're Korean. But they're Chinese because they come China's sending them over. They're like, here you go, have some soldiers. Because that'll help us out. Oh, I never realize that. They tell you that. And when they're like,

the reason we have all this money for this bomb is because China. I have to say, China's really helpful. This may anger you too, but this is typically one of the most popular, if not the most popular James Bond film. And I watched it this time,

and I was checked out. Like, I just found it a little boring. It was a chore. It was a chore to watch. I have to say, like, at the very, you know, I hated it the whole way through. And I was like, I don't get it. Guys are crazy.

Like, this is, I don't understand men. But at the very end, I was like, all right. Well, okay. Well, did you find any fun? Like, seeing past a lot of the ridiculous bullshit in there, but was there any fun for you in the world, like just the spy world and the gadgets and the music? Not the gadgets. I don't care. Oh, the gadgets.

The gadgets. I was like, that is the jankiest GPS I've ever seen like any, like, Hyundai. The janky's GPS. But it's nonsense. I don't give a shit. Right now I'm living in 2013. So I saw that and I was like a Hyundai would come with better standard GPS and I don't care. Not to mention like, oh, that's a sweet move where you destroy someone's tire like in a Mustang.

You ruin her car and then. I know. That's just mean. So terrible. Like you don't, you shouldn't need those kind of can openers on your hubcaps. Plus she just shot at you and you're just like playing it. No. Yeah, I just couldn't.

That's coming. You're jumping ahead. Okay. I'm so sorry. But no. the gadgetry I was just like it was like if someone made you go into Brookstone for one hour

and 37 minutes and you're like this is just like a Brookstone catalog. It's like a sharper image catalog that will not fucking stop. Only they're like look at my tiny radio transmitter that is the size of like a toaster and you're like I hate you. I agree like the I get that some people are like guys especially are really

into the gadgetry of it. That to me was not very interesting but I did like some of the chases and some of the fighting and some of the costumes and I don't know but the gadgets yeah I don't I like to read books

and I hate Kindles So like to me it was like The same kind of thing where I don't care about Kindle Is there anything to be taken from the fact that like I own aid Kindle? Do you really? No you don't why do you have eight Kindles?

I get the new one whenever it comes out So what do you do with the other seven? They're on Kindle eight at this point You have them like Beanie babies I'm collecting them If you ever want to sell well I don't know if I want a Kindle It's nice to have one for like $10.

Oh, look for the gadget girls. I'm just saying I'm like books. And if it has a radio transmitter and it can. So have Wi-Fi and 3G. Oh, gee, first. We'll talk about that later. Okay, let's see this. What were you going to say?

I don't remember. Okay, wait. Can we go back to the Jill who was killed with the body paint? Have we even gotten that far? No, because I want to talk about the blue-eyed Mexican man. Oh, I didn't know. Yeah, the guy that comes in, he sees the intruder in the girls. Oh, we're still there.

That is the stuntman and the guy that they hired to do it I can't remember why I guess my cheekbones look the most Mexican Yes that's right and he has like crystal blue eyes That's in the interview shut up In the interview he was like I got my cheek bones that were the most so I guess I look most Mexican Because in doctor know they're a bunch of Asians but they don't hire Asian actors they hire two they're two Asian women Yeah for the small parts who are the bigger parts that hire Anglo actors yeah and then do the movie

That's pretty natural for that time. Yeah. I mean, everything was above board from a, like, a politically correct standpoint, right? Anything goes. Yeah. Everything was, no, everything was. Let's get back to it. Yeah, no.

Also. So, that's what's so weird about, I'm sorry. No, there you go. You guys are two of, like, the nicest, gentlest creatures I've met that we know of, that we know of. Why is so suspicious, first of all? Because you love James Bond. Because you, because you're a boss. sympathizer and that makes me

I wouldn't have I ever sympathize with them? Well I mean discussing like whether or not his... I can't approach this academically? No I mean but I can you approach something involving pussy galore academically Is this there's... You sure can't. Yeah I mean you can't

I'm not defending that all I think it's ridiculous I mean you can approach and you can approach anything academically but um wait you know what's going to be worse with that? What? That's not her original name. Oh what her real name was like? Oh, Jesus. Vaginal fisting.

Oh, sorry. Oh, no, what it was is not the original response. So when she says, my name is PussyGlor. He smirks. He says, what does he say? Of course you are. I must be dreaming. Yeah.

The original line was, I know, oh, God. I know you are, but what are? Tell me. Tell me. I know you are, but what's your name? Oh, gee whiz. What? The fuck?

Like, what I don't understand is. This was made in 1963. This is like pre the summer of love. Like people were like, we kissed in a park and we smoked doobies. And that was a revolutionary. But this is like, my name is all you can eat vagina buffet. And they're like, sweet, let's put this as a mainstream movie. How is that okay?

It was cutting edge, and I'm not defending it, but action-wise, travelogue wise, gadget wise, sexism-wise, it was something people hadn't seen before. And I think that's why it was a phenomenon. Good or bad, that's why it was. because you just didn't get, you didn't get pussy galore in a movie. Well, that's the time it was.

There was a thing I read on Reddit, they had a newspaper clipping article of this section of the paper where they ask locals a question. And there's this thing where they ask husbands if it's okay to spank their wives. And they use the word spank. Every single guy says,

of course it's okay if she gets out of line. This is like 60 something. Yeah, there's a really great, like, coffee ad that you can find online of like, like an advertisement for like your wife got the wrong coffee and it's like a picture of a wife bent like straddling this dude her husband's leg and he's spanking her because that's both don't let don't get out of line your husband's going to spank you if you get the wrong coffee

abusive and and somehow like they're trying to be titillating with it or something like it's the worst of both worlds like it's funny I don't know I mean it's funny because you want that there's part of you that wants to be like everything's okay now right right we abolish slavery we can vote things are fine now and then you're like oh no not going to be fine. Nope, she found her. Your husband ever finds out

you're not store testing for freshness of coffee. Did they do something like that? This is from the 50s. I'm physically nauseated right now. This is from the 50s.

If a woman needs it, should she be spanked? Needs it. Needs it. You guys, she needs it. Yes. Yes, when they deserve it. As a barber,

I've got a lot of faith in the hairbrush. What? Um, yeah, you can put that right up. your urethra.

Oh my God. Frank Dezidiro from Brooklyn who by the way looks like the cryptkeeper. Of course. Everybody, every single person in that. Every single one of these people

looks like the biggest child molester. Probably are. Oh my God, they all look like Barry Goldwater. I wrote a note when I was watching this and it just says, I hate everyone.

Earth is archaic. I don't even know. Oh my God. I just was like, and I was watching this, I told you guys, because they just recently on September 2nd took all of the

Bond films off of Netflix. They took 17 off. Thanks Netflix for knowing that I procrastinated and she wanted to watch this movie. She sent that to me after an app yesterday. I was like, shit. And I had to watch it on this thing called VUs and I was like I didn't, I tried to find it streaming and as soon as I clicked on it, some

pop-up ad with this woman with like very pendulous teats came up like it was all porn pop-up. In order to watch this, I had to further watch more women objectifying themselves in order to watch women being objectifying. divide. I was like, sweet guys, thanks. I really love this take.

I'm going to open this vein real quick. I mean, also, okay, so Jill, she was like two seconds after meeting her and helping Goldfinger, whose first name is Orrick, which is like... Delightful. So, like, it's an insult to the periodic table. But, so he is making out with her two seconds after,

and then whatever, she dies from epidural asphyxiation. Apparently she just, like, did she just lay there, let him paint her. Well, how did he do that so fast? I'm sure he gave her a tranquilizer, right? Probably. Yeah, it probably knocked her out over the head with a champagne bow. Also, that's a way people die. Just kill someone. Just kill someone. Just slit someone's throat already. But do you think the actress actually got like legit like ovarian cancer from toxicity? No. Are you sure? They myth busted this. Yeah, I actually remember seeing that. She is. She hasn't died yet, but she might. She could die from it.

Also, she was in a, uh, she had underwear bottoms on. and nipple covers. There's pictures of her being painted. Glad that you look at this. In case you're wondering. Well, we have a book. We both have the same book. Well, also, if she's wearing underpants,

was she naked in the film, or was she wearing underpants in the film? Well, the angle they shoot, there's a thong, but you can't see it, just with the angler shoot. I was going to say, I did find it really weird that they seem to be very intimate and stoked on each other so quickly. Did you notice that, Allie?

Yeah, well, that's because he's crazy. Yeah, like, they were both, like, it wasn't just like, a quick fuck, it was like, we're gonna be here together for a while. Yeah, we're gonna get some shampoo. Shampoo? Yeah, maybe. Shampo? Champo? Well, what are you in there, bro?

Cleaning. And they were like, we're dating now, kind of. Yeah, it was an hour later. Yeah. And I love how, as soon as he was like, I can take you to the finest place in town. I was like, it's gonna be his fucking bed and it's gonna be like a plate of sausage or something fucking annoying. Like sausage and oysters next to

each other. It was like, I get it. They're fucking. Shut up, 1963. That is, uh, that is, uh, But back to the beginning of the movie. I do enjoy seeing the white tuxedo for the first time. Oh, yeah. I was thinking there's some reason in the book that I think they're like already dating in the book and that's why they have. But not that that justifies it, but I can't remember.

No, I did find it surprising that he wasn't just like hitting it and quitting it. He was like, we're going to hang out here for a while together. I was like, oh, that's not. And then she was dead. And I was like, oh. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

I did notice that he didn't seem to mourn her demise at all. He never does. Or his sister. His poor fuck. Her sister. Oh, my God, that broke my heart. I know we're not there yet. Let's go on.

Well, first of all, let's talk about James Bond's Terry Terycloth swim robe. Powder blue Terry Cloth is a one-sy. It's a featured thing in these movies for some reason. It pops up more than is common in life, and it's pretty common in my life. What does it mean? What does it mean? I have no idea. I don't know.

I don't know. I mean, it's so short. Oh, yeah. He zips himself into a baby onesie and then is like, who can I kill him? fuck. And you're like that this is in Congress and I can't handle it. Common thing where this is like fans of Bonwant, the James Bonsuit, the car, whatever, I really won't want one of those.

But nobody wants to go. No, I do. I want a lounger around and a little Terry cloth. People don't wear like the bathing suits that men wore back then. Yeah. Yeah. There are pictures of Ian Fleming in that exact same thing. I don't know if it was like a thing.

Might have been like the high style like on the south of France. That's what you see in the 60s. Or he was trying to make it a thing. Yeah. He's trying so hard. Also, I take umbrage with the fact that James Bond immediately makes himself known to Goldfinger. Yeah, he doesn't. Just by turning on the, well, just fucking stay there, watch him.

Watch him cheat. Can we agree real quick that he's a really shitty spy to begin with? Yeah, that's the common problem. Is it just him in this movie or is it in all of them? No, all the time. He lets everybody know who he is. Well, that's the thing about spies. I mean, the fact that he's a shitty to begin with.

He's a shitty spy all around. He's more lucky than anything. He's the shittiest in this movie. This movie is he very, very shitty spy. Toward the whole last half, all he does is get let around on a chain. Totally. You're like, you're not doing shit, dude. Why am I even, why are you here?

Why are you here? And I'm like this, like, really lame WWE, like, wrestling that he does with, what's his name? Odd Job. Wow, that was like, just slit his throat. Like, everyone just slit each other's throat, please. You just want more knives. So. I just want more.

I want, like, I want, like, a there will be blood, like, cattle stunner and just get it over with. Sure, exactly. Is that what they, that was a cattle stunner, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah. Cattle prouder? Oh, that. Oh, you're talking about... The hydraulic, the air pressure.

That was... No country for old men. What did I say? Whatever. I drink your fucking milkshake. I don't know which one's what. But I just want them just like an animal, put it and then just move on to the next scene

and make this movie like 45 minutes on. Why then, big question. So you guys, this is the only one you guys have seen, right? Yes. So partially to you, partially you. Why is this the favorite James Bond movie? I've never fully understood that. I don't get it.

So much kitch. Style and kitch. I mean, style. it's Aston Martin. Maybe it was like that super flight car. It does, it is like the first of the Bond films where the formula gets solidified like indelibly. Like this formula is going to repeat

for things to come. Well, that's the thing is like I kind of don't. I kind of get it because I don't completely hate it. Here's what helped. I'll tell you what help this movie reach the pinnacle it reached. The Beatles. Oh, that in reference he makes? Because 64 Beetlemania, everyone's into this

Brit fucking Britmania. So then James Bond comes out, everyone's going to be like, well, let's go see that. It's British. And he references the Beatles as he's getting down. You don't want to listen to Don Perriot. You don't want to eat, drink Don't Perriyan under 45 degrees or something like that.

It's like listening to the Beatles without earmuffs. Yeah. Blue Terrycloth ear muffs. But isn't that funny? That'd be like now someone trying to reference some like cool band. I'm trying to think who they would even if they'd be like. Well, Lady Gaga would never wear that. It's like Justin Bieber without earmush.

Yeah, because it would have to be something the kids like. They didn't know they'd be last forever, right? Yeah, well, I mean, they picked the right band. They could have. I know. It's like listening to Hermann, Hermit. Without your mom. I wouldn't have done it.

The monkeys. The monkeys would not have done it. Like the Dave Clock 5. Okay. Yeah. Over the top karate chop from Odd Job delivered. Knocks out James Bond. I love him so much. Odd Job?

Ajob? Oh, job is my favorite. I want to spin off. Ah, ah. Yeah. That's my favorite thing in the movie. I said Matt a clip of that. Oh, God.

Yeah, because I texted him, ha-ha, to something he wrote, and he just said a video clip of OJab going, Ah, ha. Okay. The, oh, he does wear a three-piece suit with a different colored vest, which I thought was interesting. Does he? I didn't even notice this.

If I noticed his clothes, it was like, you're going to get that shit dirty. Like, that's all I thought. I never was like, oh, that's a sharp line. I do like how he finds her dead. So he calls Felix. And says, the girl's dead. And then he goes,

Dink? What you spanked on the butt? No, no, no, that idiot? I don't know whatever. Yeah. Well, she could be anywhere. I don't know. She got away lucky, though.

She's like the one female that didn't die. Yeah, Dink. Yeah. She probably went on to live a long, happy life. Yeah. She's probably like, fuck that guy. Dink is way hot. She's with Odd Job in the end, maybe.

Oh, my God. Actually, I did have this, like, I want to write another fanfic of Odd Job and Pussy Galore, like, running away and coming this, like, you know, those like families of spies that they have cartoons of. I want them to be like the cutest family. They're cute little kids. It's adorable. Pitching some pretty good stuff in the room.

We got it. That's what I'm here for. Okay, so Dink Dies, not Dink Dies, sorry. Jill, no. Jill Masterson? Yeah. Tilly is the sister. I always wanted more of Tilly.

Yeah, she was good. I find her beautiful. She was so beautiful. Yeah, I like her. She's got this like aloof demeanor where she's not putting up with his shit and that you didn't get that early on from any of the girls. It's called grief. It's called grief because someone just fucking died.

She's like, hey, you fuck my sister? I care she died to you. And he's like, which one was she? But the other thing that pissed me off was like, was Tilly was like, ah, she's badass. She's seeking revenge. She has a gun. She's got a Mustang. She drives like an asshole.

I like her. And then immediately he's like, oh, you're a shitty shot. I was like, God damn it. I wanted her to be an awesome shot. Oh, you're trying your hardest? Oh, I'm sorry, but you can't do it without me because you're a fucking idiot. I was like, let her be good with a gun. We have this segment on here.

We still don't have a name for it, but at what point does the strongly established feminine character turn into the, oh, James, where they just lose everything moment. You remember the grandma shooting a fucking shotgun for some reason? That was great. That's her. Can you ship odd job? On job and the grandma. I want to see them.

I would watch them slowbone. I would be like get into it. What was that? I remember like zoning out at some point. point I'm like, hey, they're chasing each other. What the hell is this old lady doing? Oh my God. Would that explain and I missed it? No. No, she just lives

in that little gatehouse. Tilly is, I think in the book Tilly is a lesbian and I've said this before Fleming has a huge issue with lesbians and he's always converting them with just a kiss from a man and he has some real aversion. Have you seen Orange is the New Black?

Of course. So the ward, not the warden, but the guy running. He has that thing of like just anything as long as you're not a lesbian. He has Sappophobia. Oh. I don't know. I made that up. I mean, sapphic coming from him.

Yeah, yeah. I think that Fleming has something like that. It comes up in his books way too often. He's a real homophobia. His mom is probably a lesbian. We're going to address that later with the pussy, but I know it sounds horrible when I just say that. That's her first name. I'm sorry, guys.

Now we go, now we find out what his real mission is. So he goes to England where we meet. the most British-looking gentleman I've ever seen in my life. Oh, God. The Colonel at the table. Oh, right. With his two wisps of combed over hair that he is hanging on to. Oh, my God.

You guys, I'm not going to lie. During this part, I opened up another tab and just checked out Pinterest for a couple of minutes. I was like, well, let me tell you. And my top most English people, Pinterest board, he would be number one. Way to segue. Way to relate to it to. Number one. Colonel Smithers is his name

The most English sounding name Impossible The little Colonel Smith That's worth 5,000 pounds Yeah I don't think I Did it sound like one of them had marl in their mouth The whole time? Yeah yeah

A little bit always somebody is I don't know That's why I kind of don't really understand Why they were after him Because I didn't really hear He was it was stuffed with beef Wellington I feel like You just reminded me that his like

Fiancese is in the next scene Which makes me want to fuck it Who's fiance? James Bond's like girlfriend who think oh she thinks that's her boyfriend does she? Money penny? Yeah the secretary No no it's a game they play it's a it's a runs throughout all the movies

Oh it's not Are you sure? Does she know that that's a game? Yes she knows it's a game They play this like oh I love you I love you I mean it's still a little twisted because you know it No they never do Oh good I was confused Well that's right in Skyfall the latest one

There's a did they or didn't they They didn't miss it whereas I think she just blew them Oh, really? Oh, is that all? After, after, like, 35 years or whatever? Well, Skyfall retcons. So what happens is Skyfall is the introduction of the Moneypenny character. Oh.

And they make her black. And she is gorgeous. Cool. That's good. My thing when I saw the Money Pony situation is she was wearing, like, a crew neck shirt. So I was like, oh, so she's not a sex object. Because if you were fucking her, I would be seeing half of her nipples right now. And so I figured maybe she,

She was like... Do you mean ariola and? No. It's well known. It's well known that Money Penny has no area. No, it's a cutoff shirt. It's like a cutoff shirt with a just a nipple hole. She was being in a sex harness and I'd be like, oh, he likes her. But since she was in an actual attire, I was like, oh, she's unsexualized. Or she's a lesbian. From a somatic sense.

But I would, but I figured that she was trying to get him married or she was like the wife of someone he knew. I was like, he doesn't want to bang her or else I'd be seen her butt cheeks. Pop culturally, you guys didn't really have a sense of who Moneypenny was. I had no fucking idea. This is good. This is good. It's like Gilligan. We just cut back from Gilgad's Island and we're like, what's James Bond?

I'm trying to think of what other things, what conventions we could ask that. You both have been fighting for the Japanese, have been in a cave. It is weird that one of us is a redhead and one of us is in brunette and pig tails right now. Yeah. One of us is very chin-shed. Yeah, I don't get it. We've been eating coconut pies. Oh, I was, I'm dressed like the professor right now.

Oh my God. No, that's Gilligan, bro. No, that's very, that's professory I had a button up on earlier, I swear. That's true. Got to get the hells up in this place. I like how you had corduroys and a button up on. Corderoys and a button up.

Oh, my God. You guys. We're such a cute couple. We're the best. Twinsies. Okay, now we come to James Bond has some Nazi gold. Oh, yeah, that's my favorite kind of gold.

Rose gold, no, Nazi gold, yes. Did you not propose to me unless it's the Nazi gold ring. because I will say no. Note takes. And a blood diamond. And a blood diamond. And this is how he's going to get in with Goldfinger somehow. So they go play golf.

Guys, did you know that what you're seeing with Goldfinger is what I think is the best overdubbing ever done in a movie? Really? Is that what that what's going on? That's not his voice. The actor that plays Goldfinger. And most of the women in the first few films are dubbed as well. That is not his voice. Did he know that was going to happen to him?

I don't know. He didn't. The actor's like, what the hell? I'm not an Austrian. It's crazy. In the German version, he dubbed his own voice back as well. Did you know that? Didn't know that.

Wait, he's German. Why did they do this? His accent was way too thick. He lied about whether or not he could speak English. Like, or his agent lied for him. Yeah, yeah. And then they hired him based on his performance in a German movie. Oh, my fucking God.

Where he plays it like a pedophile. You guys, that is diabolical. I feel like that's what a James Bond villain would do. Yes. But I also like the fact of the show. Like, well, we'll just not overdub it. Let me go. All the girls are overdubbed except for Pussy Galore.

Oh, yeah? All of them? Through. It goes, the third one, this one, Pussy Galore, she's not dubbed, and then Diana Rigg in Honor Majesty's Secret Service is not. But all the way up through Diamonds are Forever. They're all dubbed. Do they have a man dubbed?

I know. Like in Shakespearean times, like no female actors. Why do they dub them just to make them less human? Well, it's usually an accent issue because Ursula Andres was Swedish. The Russian girl was Italian and they just, their accents were too thick. Why didn't they cast legitimate what they wanted?

I don't know. I think the Natalie Wood sister gets dubbed and I don't know what the reason for that one was. Oh, Lana. Yeah, Lana Wood. God. This is complicated. That's another thing as I was watching this. My DO tool. And I was like how, I, again

in my notes, just wrote how much did this cost for like so many O's, I just looked at it? That's a good question. How much to this fucking thing cost? Even all the extras, all of, like, having a burning Mercedes, like, Corrine down at a dry grass hillside, like, all of that. I'm like, what is the... And not to mention, don't think I wasn't thinking about what the craft service was like on this.

Because I was like, was it shitty? No, I can speak to that. It was good? It's, yeah, because the broccoli who produced this film treat everything like a family. Like, the crew moves from movie to movie to movie and they bring in really nice food. And one time they were filming in, like, Saudi Arabia. It was in Cairo. Was it Ishtar?

That's a good movie, too. He made, personally made pasta for all the crew and everything because the food was making everybody sick. Except for the women. Coffee broccoli. The women were allowed to eat. This series is now run by a woman. Yes, his daughter and she runs the whole thing. We're big fans of her.

Yeah, she's a looker. She's more than a looker. Is that why you're a big fan of hers? Because she's the most misogynist thing that is. Was it? No. She runs a whole production, and I like her because. she's got great tics.

Hot. She's hot. Thanks, guys. She is a beautiful 60-year-old woman. Okay. As long as she's pretty, because throw them on the trash sheet if they're not. Am I right? Well, in fairness, I think most of the creative is done by Michael G. Wilson, her stepbrother. You think so?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't think she doesn't think she does anything. I heard that they swap movies. What? That's why I'm prepared to believe casino royale is so good, and Skyfall was so good, and the other one wasn't because I'm not a huge fan of Michael D. Wilson.

If I'm going to be honest. Is he ugly? Do not. Yeah, he is. Hey, look, I didn't. He's not a great looking guy. He's not a great looking guy. It's Matt, not Matt said that.

Don't worry you. He is guy. You should see the dong on him. I'm a fan of his work. He's got a great dick. Okay. Okay. Come on.

He has some of the prettiest balls in the business. Who does? I don't know, just anyone that you're a fan of Spielberg? Great dick. You should see it. Isn't it good? I don't know. I'm just saying that she's being facetious.

Oh, well, I wouldn't get offended if you thought someone's dick look great. No, I'm just saying that if you're going to talk about the merits of a filmmaker or producer, perhaps something physical isn't the first thing you would point out. Well, it depends on what you're talking about. I'm going to sit out. You and I? Let's sit out in this conversation. Go get a quick drink.

You two go. Like, if you're talking about like Harvey Weinstein, the first thing I would mention is... Great pair of tits. I would say that about Harvey. I wouldn't say that. His ovaries are... Stunning.

If you guys listen back, there's a, I believe there is an episode. Oh, I don't know. Does it this podcast where I went on a long run about Barbara Broccoli? I think so. Barbara Broccoli sounds like the worst bond girl ever. I have a huge crush on Barbara Broccoli. Okay. So you were just mentioning there.

And it's a previously established thing. That's true. I get what he's saying. It is canonical that I would mention that. All right. It's part of your crush, not part of why you think she's talented. Correct. She is talented, flat out.

She's amazing producers. I'm also confused. I'm also confused by her accent, but that's besides the way. Can we talk about Barbara Broccoli as a bond girl, though? Always, always shit in her teeth. She's vegan and really hard maintenance. She's a little farty. All the time.

She's in a bikini, but she looks like seven months pregnant because she's so gouting. Barbara, Barbara Brooklyn. A grill full of green. She's just painted green to death. Yeah, when people, she kills, they're just like this weird tint of green. I'm into it. She farts them to death. Look at how she gasses them.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you guys. No, I'm sorry that you guys invited two people on who don't know anything about. It's fine. It's fine. No, we know things about Bond. We know it's so... We know that we watched one and a half hours of Bond. Oh.

And it's not to our liking. You watched a shorter version of the movie? How long was it? This era is different than other eras. And I'm not saying every era doesn't have its downfall, but they, but they're, do change quite a bit. Okay. As a child,

I was always fascinated by the golf scene. I still am. I love... I'm not really a golfer. I loved the caddy. Yeah. You crafty,

oh. Yeah, because he seems like he's out of a... It's your honor, sir. Oh, my God. Do I love that gentleman? He's like my fair lady

kind of like... Yeah, yeah. He's playing a Schlesinger 7, boss. That's a Slossinger 7. Goldfinger plays a Slossinger 1. Oh, you crafty old devil. then we've got him sir we've just said all of his lines

he kind of he tries to endear himself to bond like we're a team right buddy what are we going to do after this huh I never see him and you're like hot wings yeah I'm just like no let's go to the country club that got great shall we go to the 19th hole boss yeah I just was always fascinated by the strict rules of golf yeah I didn't follow it completely I don't understand golf

but it did seem very I must have played the wrong ball somewhere on the 18th I play shlaid shlaid shi so that rinds you gotta write me a check that was weird too like bond doesn't need a check from you. Yeah, that made it seem like he was like collecting child support. Totally. You know what I mean? Well, I mean, they did Dealing cash, fuckers. They did have a wager.

It was a principal thing. How much money was it? How much money was it? How much money was it? Five thousand pounds? I can't remember. We know what it was Keep it. I don't even need it. Oh, that's true. Yeah, I know. He should have yeah, he should have like crumpled it up or ate it and shit it on him. He should have done it when odd job crushes the ball.

Totally. Yeah. And they went, oh wait. I needed that for my actual child support. I know. 13 children around the I feel like is this the most vitriolic podcast you've ever done? By far. I feel like we're going to get a lot

of nerdish people hating us. You shouldn't. I've said the F word a lot, you guys. Doesn't matter. But I really do, I really, I text it Ali early. Like, we're going to get a lot of new enemies. I don't care.

I will say right now, do not, do not right disparaging things. If you're thinking that, then that's an issue. Oh, I don't care. No, I do. I don't care if any. If someone, if someone, sure, can comment at me, bro.

Like, if someone doesn't like that I don't appreciate like antique misogyny, then they can fuck themselves so much. Let's not anticipate animosity right away. I'm just having a spirited conversation where I like it. I like this sort of thing where it comes from law. But a lot of people get real. You're secure in your bondhood and I think a lot of people. No, I don't care.

I'm, we have every right to say disparaging things about things that we find to be disparaging. Yeah. So does that? Yeah, sure. But on a podcast that is directly for the love of... I take it on faith that a lot of our listeners understand that this series is flawed. That is certainly why we love it because there are certain movies and scenes that we love and certain ones that can't believe past muster.

Some of these movies are... When we get to die another day. If I can say, though, also, if this were like a breakfast of Tiffany's, if you guys had a Capote cast, I think it would be hilarious to discuss how fucked up breakfast that Tiffany was talking Truman talking Truman talking talking Truman I like it yeah I like it Truman talk Truman Capote yeah I just keep thinking like a pod capote that's chat potty no we'll talk about it Capodcast I'm just saying like it's but it's just funny to look at

Truman Capodica what's funny can we change this podcast for that because that In cold pod sorry you guys you guys we can't stay mad at each other no we can't stay mad at each other No, yeah. I love Bond. I hate it. This is bullshit. That's what I kind of like about James Bond in general, and I don't mind saying this, is because I've never spoken to anyone who's like, no, it's great, great.

It's great and it's, you know, a beautiful film. No, everyone's like, it's crazy and kind of corny and silly, but also made well and funny and sticks with its... Yeah, it's a phenomenon in itself for better or for worse. It's not like I'm insulting, like... I find it, I find it interesting coming at it from your angle of being, you know, adult women in 2013 and watching 1963

Right And whereas I find it I find it Batchit crazy that it would slap her in the ass And say man talk Totally But then there's a part of me that goes like That's charming

In the way that I find madmen charming sometimes You know what I mean? As a film not as that concept Of slapping a girl on the body's charm Well the thing about madmen is like I find it charming That they didn't know any better Well the thing about madmen though

Is then they would then follow dinkhead, what was her name? Dink. Dink. Did you call her Dinkhead? Which actually would make more sense. That they would then follow her and her life and what it's like to be Dink instead of like, there's goes,

run, no, no, no. She'll take, you know, but which I do also find funny. But female characters are very disposable in this series. That's why I love Paseelores because she was a freaking badass. Well, yeah, that was the redemption. That was like the third act redemption where you're like, okay, I guess. There's always one badass girl.

That may be part of the reason why this film is heralded is because it is the first one to have the bond girl play a pivotal role in like saving the day and she's kind of more fully developed even if she gets day raped in a barn I was gonna say she was fucking mouth raped in horrible pants

yeah like that's one thing I was like can they get her in some decent fucking pants? It was the same cut pattern for all her colors of pants they were like he saggy bottom jawed first and I was like get this woman some good pants that is rape right there is putting her in those they were not okay

she's the oldest at the time I love that. The oldest actress to ever play a Bond Girl, to this date, 37. Wait, really? She was 37? She's getting a little older. Yeah. They all, like, all actors do from that era they seem, because Connery's only like 35 in this movie.

Are you kidding me? Yeah. Something like that. It's the damn son that they, like, could. I know. And M is 17. Can you believe that? It's amazing.

What? Who? The old guy. I'm kidding. What was I going to say? Oh, she's amazing in, like, behind the scenes features. She's one of my favorite people. She's just.

the way she's so, I don't know, she knew how to take that roll on early on and just be like, it's called Pussy Galore, let's get over with it. I love that she's like, when do I get a chance in my life to say to someone, I'm immune to that? Save your fucking charm. Yeah, I'm immune to it.

Yeah. I know, but she's not immune. She's like, JK, you're going to rate me in a second. Yeah, as soon as you kiss me, I'm all yours. Yeah, exactly. She's like, oh, that's actually fake armor. Takes a few kisses though, right? It takes him, she's in a fucking headlock

in the barn. The worst to me, obviously it's a horrible situation the way she converts, but when they do these shoulder twists and throw each other over into the hayloft, this music is like, br-drink, like, it's almost like a fairy is converting her to heterosexuality. Like, you're better off being heterosexual. Let's find a pot of gold. That was it like a musical shrug. Can I, can I? Can I admit something? Yes.

I think I missed this entire scene. I think I must have gotten up. Oh, shit. I just thought they didn't do it to the end. You would remember. I'm not even kidding. No, he, no, he puts her in a pile of horse manure. After they land and the little ding-dongs riding the planes all run up to her after that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was making chili, and I must have, you know what else you missed? Got onion in my eye. I should compare chili recipes. Okay. Can we discuss, did you miss the whole, like, shittiest julep ever seen? Because they're drinking juleps, and I was like, what the fuck is with those proportions? and also why is there no ice in that?

Okay, but so now, sorry. That's cocktail. There's got to be some willing suspension of disbelief in this whole film because, I mean, obviously he couldn't survive any of this stuff. So some of it, you've got to give some license. I'm not talking about like the bullshit misogyny, but minjulips and gunshots and stuff like that. It's a comic movie.

But look at my last note. Minjulips! Exclamation mark. But it wasn't because I realized that they were doing it wrong. I had checked out so much that I was like, all I could think about is I want a mincholip. Min tulip. We should have made you one.

You know who makes a hell of a mint tulip? Bloods. Really? They have a really good to know. They guess, you know who doesn't? James Bond movies. It's shitty. So what is the problem? First of all, it's not in a silver julep container. It's not in a sterling silver.

She's getting major Jeffrey Boothroid right here. Which is what they serve it in at bloodsos. Well, no, it should be, mint julep is traditionally served in a sterling silver cup. We make cocktails for a living. For a living. For a living. For a living.

For the way I know. I know. It should be like floor of the cup to the top, crushed ice. and they had like a couple of shitty ice cubes. Over the top even. Yeah. But is there? Floating it like floating up top.

They did not look like they had enough mint. It did not look like it had been crushed. And it was a glass. It was like a Collins glass. It was like super tall and watery. And I was like a like a julep is like essentially bourbon, a little bit of sugar, mint. And then the ice kind of melts in it sort of like that's kind of what mixes it all. But this is, what the fuck was this?

It didn't need to be a julep. It could have been just in a cocktail. It looked like ice tea, but they were in Kentucky. If there's a section where. negative comments are going to come. This may be because there's going to be some guy who goes well in Kentucky in the 60s. Collins glasses are traditional Kentucky.

That I'm willing to learn. That I'm willing to learn. I don't know that, but I am worried that there is going to be someone. Even if it's not even true, someone will find some arcane section of the internet. I might be wrong, but the other thing is, is it would look way more dope if they were all drinking from sterling silver cups, although it was gold finger. Maybe they should have had gold cups. No, it was gold on the plane.

He brought him a martini and it was in a gold glass. Oh, P.S. He's an alcoholic. Oh, for sure. I'm drinking for three. PPS. I love the pervy bathroom. I know. Oh, God. With a fucking smile for whoever's in the bathroom. Can we talk about her American Apparel shirt?

Like the stewardess who had a long-sleeved turtleneck that came right below the boobs. I think I saw that in American Apparel. Like it's gold lame. It's like the worst. I liked her. Oh, how can you not remember that? It's egregious. I mean, it's...

Because I don't see gender. No. I'm afraid on this podcast right now. Unless there are nipple cutouts. No, it was egregious from like a fashion standpoint, not massage me. I don't remember, though. I don't remember that outfit either. I remember it.

Is it long sleeve turn? It's a long sleeve turn like it goes right below the butt. It just, it looks like something someone would like selfie on Instagram and be like outfit the day. You're like, oh, that looks so high-wasted shorts. Who are you following this? Posting outfits of the day. It's a hate-foss.

It's a hate follow. It's not a legit follow. I love hate follow. Yeah, that's true. I love hate follow. Okay, what else you guys want to tell us about. this. Well, first of all, we skipped the iconic James Bond laser scene. Oh, yeah. Which in the book was

a buzz soft. Was he supposed to, I have a question about this. Was he supposed to get killed? Or was Goldfinger really just like, oh, I'm going to pretend like I'm going to kill you? He wanted him. He was going to dispose of him. Then why don't you just leave? This is getting to the heart of

major errors in the villains of the Bond series. And at the time, it seems so cliche now, because they'd also monologue and go, I'm going to kill you, but first I want to tell you my plan. Sure, sure. So that's become a horrible cliche now, but this was kind of the series that started that. So it probably maybe didn't seem as weird. Yeah.

It's another, but it's another thing. Same as the other things. It's just a holdover for something. I didn't mind. I don't mind any of that. And I don't mind that he's like, oh, no, I'm really going to try to make you talk, which he doesn't talk. tell him he knows anything.

But, yeah, I wasn't clear. Yeah, why leave him? I really, it's weird. Gert Frobe does a couple of nuisancey things with his performance that I really like. And one of the things that he does is his dismissive eye. rub. Oh. Yeah,

not that you say that, yeah, he just, like does this a lot. Oh, God. Like, that's his move.

Oh, I own the club. It just, like, walks away. Super cash. Is that the actor or the character?

Like, or is it just the actor going, hmm. The actor has something with eye, the entire.

It's, no, and he does it again when he's walking up the stairs and bonds on the thing. He does the

eye rub and the dismissive eye rub, which I don't know, it's just a fun little nuanced performance thing that I really

Maybe you should adopt it and start doing it yourself. Yeah. You're going to get so much pink eye just from the epic. You're going to actually need to do that. I thought you were going to say you're going to get so much. Pink eye galore. Well, you know what's funny is when they're in that club and then all of a sudden it turns into like a lazarium or whatever and like all of the

windows shut. And I love how there are all these like Americans who are supposed to be air quotes from Kentucky and they're like, hey boss, what are you doing over there? They're supposed to be like a banicsy mobsder. Those are the mobsters from all over the country. That was my favorite. It was no less stereotypical. Okay, okay.

Stereotype there was that. Those dudes were my favorite. Do you know who one of them is? Who? No. Gary Marshall. Shut up. What?

How did that happen? He has a line and I don't know if I read it somewhere. I'm like, no way. All right, that does seem like him and then you go on Gary Marshall's IMDB. What's his line? Have you read his book? I can't remember. Gary Marshall?

Yeah. No. I was an uncredited bob. It's called my Hollywood. with happy days or something like that? I've started reading it, but that is not in there yet. Well, one of the reasons...

Penny Marshall's book. I'm just throwing this out here. This is unrelated. Oh, is it good? Read Penny Marshall's book. What is that one? It's called My Mother's Nuts. I fucking loved it. Anyway. One of the reasons personally why I love this series is the production design. And so that room where all those mobsters are in and the fact

that a pool table moves and becomes a model of Fort Knox. Oh, my God. There's no one. There's no reason for it. And no, the comment, the narrative that all of those guys had to do, like, why is there a, when it's turning off? Like, they're narrating the entire movie and their shitty. What would he have done if multiple people wanted to go back to the airport? I felt so bad for that guy.

And he's like, I'm leaving. And I'm like, that's a good idea, but you're going to get murdered into a little box. And that happens, like, four times in different movies, the same exact thing. He has, don't go. Really? Yeah. One guy goes? Yeah, he'll be like, I'm not into this.

And then he'll die in a weird way, like a guy falls out of a limp and. And a guy falls out of a blimp. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Well, but he's walking down the stairs and the stairs turned to a ramp. Oh, I've seen a clip of that in my lifetime. But this production design, I just, I can't get enough of it because it's so heightened. Yeah, and it's wood and steel.

It's all done by the same guy. No, the floor's moving. Why is the floor moving? I know. It makes no sense, but I, that's the cartooning part of that I just can't get in it. Is that, that pool table situation, that room really only exists for this specific moment. Exactly. Like, yeah, that it's

The character of Goldfinger was like, let's go nuts. Let's do this. First of all, he starts rubbing his eyes. Yeah, like he designed. I want a place I can play billiards, but also lay out my old diabolical plan. Someone says to him, where are we going to put the model?

Under the pool table. Where are you going? The fact that, A, he's going to be like outy in like, what, a couple days. And B has probably not been saying, he just got in that day, didn't he? Yeah. And this is all in Kentucky, and he lives in Switzerland. But he also, I mean, he studs horses.

I'll bet. Oh, that's right. I forgot he studs horses. Yeah, he's a, he like makes love connections with horses. I love that there's like a bunch of pussy and studs in this one. Oh, yeah, the other is. Come on, repress 196. 83, let's get it all.

I also enjoy that Felix, Felix, James Mon's a captive at this point. He is underneath the Kentucky building. Looking great. CIA obviously is there to watch him, but what is the CIA doing? They are at Kentucky Fried Chicken. Oh my God, that was made me so, that was the one part of the movie where I got excited. That was the one part of the movie. Like, oh, they're eating a bucket of chicken.

I was making the chili and I was like, oh, they're Kentucky Fried Chicken. Retro Kentucky Fried Chicken. Super excited. I get super excited about that. Is that weird? Well, that's when the most relatable part of the film is like getting a bucket of chicken. You're like, done that. Everything else, you're like, what the fuck, man.

Who hasn't? Okay Also the CIA Don't worry about it It's delicious It's so good Thank you Did we announce what these are

On the podcast No you don't have to These are so good It's chocolate covered Mata with Sweetened shredded coconut Bominate You are singing my song

It's good It's one of our holiday recipes Snacks Snacks like a good bitch If we didn't bring a snack You could have spanked us I was a little like Wait am I bringing snacks to men right now

This is Guys where's the hairbrush Oh, oh. Well, sometimes she needs it. If she deserves it, yeah, sure. Oh, God. I don't understand it. I really don't understand that time.

But, I mean, people are all dead now. But, I mean, people are still terrible. This is what incenses me about this. Is, like, if misogyny weren't such a big deal currently, then this film wouldn't piss me off so much. And it's like, like, even looking at the shitty, like, Miley Cyrus situation where no one was like, hey, Robin Thick, you're married. Why are you? shoving your penis against this girl who's 20 who's an idiot. Like no one asked him what he was doing at the VMAs or whatever. Like there's still horrible, that's a

terrible example, but there's still like horrible misogyny and women don't have the same opportunities. So you could be like, oh, this is so quaint that that's how it used to be, but it's not still kind of like that. No, it's still like that. Like it's still like that in everywhere. It would be like, oh, it's cute that racism happened that thing because it doesn't happen anymore. Everyone's equal now.

No, it still does. Like even if you were to analyze current movies now, you would see that the damsel's usually in distress. And there's, you know, usually a woman torn between two terrible men and, like, look at all the antihers that we were just talking about on cable. Like, it's just like, you're like, it's not over. We're all Skyler-white when it comes down to it. Still, am I right, you're right? I'm doing a hell of a job with that car wash, though.

Oh, yeah, she is. She's killing it. I literally have no idea what you're talking about. Well, I felt that way when you talk about the VMAs. Oh, you didn't, you might. And I think we're the two people that didn't bother. Really? Oh, it's just, well, the thing. I just saw that video.

for the first time ever. It's so. I've never seen it. Well, the reason why the VMAs were noteworthy is because it was a top story on CNN, like the day that we were like also discussing gassing thousands of people in Syria. So the fact that that's on people's minds. Well, if they were related,

I thought, I thought Miley was going to guess. I was on a treadmill yesterday at the gym, and they were showing the video of like all the gas people. Oh, I saw that. The kids getting the water washing out their eyes and stuff like that. I'm like, why? They should have had Pussy Golo switched the gas in the last minute, you guys.

No, right? Barbara Broccoli should have not gasped everything. This has come full circle from chemical weapons and warfare back to James Bond. In a weird way, I'm impressed. Thank you. I couldn't ignore the look at how you're exterminating people like cockroaches. Oh, look, it's a current problem. But I mean, I love that it turns out, are we at that part yet where they've decided to search the gas?

Hang on. A couple things I just wanted to point out. The amount of time spent on the car crusher crushing that Lincoln. Oh, so long. They loved that. They spent $30,000 or whatever the equivalent of that is on the car. They bought the car brand new. Ford wouldn't give them one.

They bought that car brand new. They wanted to have Bond drive a Jaguar first and they wouldn't give it to him. And that's why the Aston Martin. You guys, there would be so much more blood. I know. Where is the blood? If you crush a human being that's a sack of blood and guts. And then why didn't they just leave it there?

Why do they take it with them? What's he going to do? Oh, because he wanted to extract his gold. Instead of just having odd job pull the gold out of the trunk. Right. Before the fucking, because what they, remember, because he takes, gives him the gold, and then they need to, like, extract the gold. That's why he brings the cube back.

So instead of just grabbing the case when you get out of the car, have a good time. No, he decides. This disbelief not suspended. There. Then, I like how when she. slips into something more comfortable we're back now pussy galore and james are going to hang out for the

afternoon apparently I guess so gold fingers like pussy you're on that yeah get on this so she changes but she just puts on a purple version of her outfit exactly she looks like the Joker

no it's the same literally it's the same outfit same fabric well you guys purple relaxes you it's been shown in psychological studies no I have no idea I don't I just don't I don't you know what kind of bothered me about that is that Pussy Goulor is a trained pilot. She teaches people how to do that.

But her job is also to slowbone a captive? No. She's like a fluffer. Find someone else to do that. Well, was he not giving her the job because he's kind of probably going like, she'll never switch over. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He knows she's a lesbian.

I feel like he was like, she is not going to enjoy. This way he can't seduce her like he probably would someone else. Yeah, I don't know. That's a bummer that she, I didn't realize she was supposed to be a lesbian. I thought she was just a strong female character. Me too. In the book, she is at least. I hate it more now.

I told you he has a real problem. She's like nailing her entire flight school. Wait, so instead of just being like, oh, this chick's got it together, man, she's got a job. It's like, oh, no. I didn't know she was a lesbian until later in life when I read it that she was supposed to be a lesbian. But why does it make her less developed to be a lesbian? Because of course, because of course she's an other in terms of like female strength

because she doesn't need a man because she has eschewed like the phallus in general that's why she's powerful but if you're like if do you know what I mean like she's like an angry lesbian She just wasn't in to James Bond

because he's a creep just because he's a creep not because she doesn't like B so when she said she was immune to him we thought I thought she just meant we didn't realize I'm not an idiot no I like vaginas too because that's like that's not a character strength

that's just a preference of genitals and like the only way to get a lesbian to turn is by forcing herself upon her and then she'll learn that she likes on a stud farm. A horse rape her on a stud farm. I did write down

I wrote down whimsical Disney string hits during the fight. And then I also wrote down it's only rape for the first four-fifths of the scene. Oh, jeez. Yeah, that's actually a really prevalent thing in a lot of old movies where it's like it's rapy until

she falls for it and then it's not rapy anymore. Until she can no longer Yeah, it's like, it's raping until she's like, well, I can get hurt or I can just let you pretend like I'm into this. So it's not rape anymore because you're, oh God, we're getting real deep. You guys. No, I mean, go. This is James Bond.

We need to know. We're bonding. We're James Bond. Allie, what do you got? Oh, no. Apparently I wrote and mouth raping her, he's not a stable individual to force around with. Yay! Yes.

Hey. Wait, you wrote that or that's in the movie? No, I wrote that in my notes because of it. Apparently, I was so bored. That could be either way. I was so bored that I started making horse puns during a rape scene. I would also like to point out that they put on the gas masks, the crew that's going to break into Fort Knox. But what I think is adorable is that they put the gas masks on and then put their hats back on over the gas masks.

It's so cute. They all struggle to put it back on over the thing. It's like, what is this aesthetic? Why do we need their fucking hats on? I did decide that if I ever get invited to put James Bond party. like your 41st birthday party, I am going to dress as one of the like the minions,

the little quote unquote Asian Chinese minions. I believe they're called Oriental at this time period. The gray pajamas, the yellow sash. That's a good outfit. That's my outfit. I'm going to get a gold tuxedo. There was a... I'm going as a grandma with the machine gun.

Me too. There is a moment. At what point is there like dancing girls in this movie? Well, at the beginning there is the belly. Oh, and there's also at the pool. There's dancing girls in the pool. There's a point where the score is all like spy stuff and then like the camera's moving and there's girls dancing. And as the girls come on to the screen, the music goes from like,

bun, um, ba, wakitka, kakka, kak, do you remember this? I can't remember what part it is. I feel like you. But even the score is misogynist. It's crazy. Some sort of like brain aneurism that created. No, I know. Well, there is even a scene at the pool in the beginning where like, you know the like, you know the like obviously like,

filmed before shots of like the pool and everyone having fun at the pool. Yeah, and how well they time that dive when that guy comes up. Oh, like there's nobody in the pool, but that guy. I love that. It was like a helicopter shot and the guy had to nail it and they probably didn't even have walkie-talkies back then. I don't know what. There wasn't one other person in the pool, which is weird.

Anyway, that's true. So there's like the scene of like, just like a panning by scene of extras and it's like action and one guy with his arm around two bikini-clad girls run off. And it's like even the fucking extras are like, Two to one. Everyone. But that's the thing. This is why I feel justified in being as incensed as I am is because if you watch any music videos, women as duplicates with a single man is a common theme you will see in anything. You're just thinking of those two Robert Palmer videos. No. And blurred lines. That's it. That's all it is. And every other one. And everything. But I mean, women is like as identityless duplicates of each other.

The worst example of that is twins. Gross. That's incest. Wait, what? Oh, guys are like, I'm totally Twins. No, you're not. And twins. Twins. Yeah.

Is that Budweiser or something? I think so. What I'm just in the fucking stupidest thing in the world. I'm so annoyed that I have a headache. Like, I'm so angry. Let's go, talk it out. Let's get, let's help. Let's, how do we?

Let's have, let's have feminism with Allie Ward. I'm just going to say, you guys should watch Casino Royale. I'd be interested in their take. I think you'd still find some major issues, like you said, even just with the character of showing a flawed character and why is that okay or whatever. But it would be interesting to see what you guys think of where they've gone.

Even though it's going back to the first novel. No, I'm very interested in that. So much so that I might have you guys come back. Hey, didn't we have a martini in the Duke Hotel where it was where they wrote James Bond? Wait, what? There was a martini bar in the Duke Hotel in London that is one of the best martinies.

Barcini bars, air quotes on the planet. And the guy who wrote the Bond series would drink his martini's air. And shake and not start is usually not the proper way to drink a martini. He talks about that. He does. And how he uses gin martinis, even though it's both gin and vodka and a Vesper Martini, wasn't very popular at the time. And he switched it back. That's essentially him being like, I'd like a gloss of Merlot, extra ice.

And you're like, what fuck are you doing? Do you know what I mean? But somehow that's like made him cool. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. But that has informed my drinking. James Bond has informed my... Sure.

Really? In a way? I drink... Just depression. I drink martinis and scotch. And that's almost... I no longer drink. You know, or drunk history?

Yeah. Oh, God. Toyota is not going to turn into an Aston Martin. It's a Volvo. And, okay, whatever. Do you know what I mean? Like, that's what's so funny is, like, is how these things are picked up kind of subconsciously or whatever, but, like, that those seem like manly drinks.

But, like, there's nothing manly about a martini glass. Oh, yeah. For sure. most ill-shaped thing ever to hold liquid. I love that. That's what I love about. His favorite drink comes in this just shapely glass. Delicates.

Yeah. I love that. Jonah calls it a table with a table with a stick. Yeah. Oh, I don't remember. Oh, Jonah has a name for how shitty a martini glass. Oh, they're awful.

And he's probably mad because I always spill it on him. He's usually next to me when I'm drinking. The other thing is, it's like, it's like seven fluid ounces of, straight distilled spirit. So you can afford to spill at least four of those ounces on your pants, and you're still an alcoholic. It's like you're fine. No, I don't, yeah, I love it.

I love it. And martini is like the Costco of beverages. It's like how much can I get alcohol in bulk? Yeah. I can make a hell of a Vesper. I have a lay at home. Really? What if instead it was like a Long Island iced tea?

Because that's just as bad. It'll have a long oil. How is that, James Bond? In a plastic cup with a strong. I'll have a long island. I do. I'm not going to lie. When I am at a bar that does not have a martini glass,

and yet they still make a martini, I do kind of get delighted by the thing. Oh, I order martinis in a... A low ball? Oh, really? I don't get... I will never get a fucking martini glass. I order in a tumbler, period.

Why, just because of their top-heavy or... They spill. They're top-heavy, they look stupid. It looks like Carrie Bradshaw. Yeah, you look like you're a dude. And you drink it like a... Yeah, you look stupid when you're drinking out of a... You know what?

You know why, though? Not you specifically. I bet you look amazing. Do you know what martini glasses are made for? They're made to sit on a bar where you just slurp your lips to it and you don't get off the stool for four hours. I'm in sense now because here's something that I've always bothered me. Okay. And this is a gender thing as well. All right. There are certain drinks that men cannot drink.

Apple candy. Pisses me off because I love cookies. I love sweet, sweet, flowery, girly drinks. A Cosmo isn't even really girly. And I don't care who knows it. Yeah. Everyone does now. Yes.

Do you want to say? But I like Scott. I do. But I don't like this thing when you're with someone and they're like, like the waiter will go here. Oh, God. And the guy next, you'll be like, for the girls, right? Or whatever. Well, that guy, you need to stop hanging out with assholes.

Yeah. Well, this guy is just at the table next door. Is it Paul? Is it Paul? Yeah. No, but it does bother me that there is this thing. Because I think it's one of those things that's just stigma-related. And I don't even think that guy really thinks that.

In fact, I bet he probably likes a drink. He thinks I'm supposed to say that that's the new norm. and that bugs me. So what's your favorite drink then? I love girly drinks. Yeah, well, I do, I mean, that being said, I also do like I really like just a good smoky scotch. But like, from that.

You don't have to say that. Well, I don't need more, but. He drank so much Lefroyd during drunk history. I asked me about this and he, like, couldn't look at it. I can't smell it anymore. Still? Yeah, it makes me nauseous. Do not get, do not binge on Lefroy.

Lucky for us, we drink a little of everything. So we can't be. I love, love a mojito. Oh, sure. I get looks. Yeah, you do get looks. Really? But I know that one's not super mojito, so like, yeah, I don't, it's not like a drink, like a pink drink or anything like that, but.

Like a hybiscuit spritzer? Oh, that sounds so bad. What about a white wine spitzer? I got one, I got a flight of martinis once. Flight of martinis is a thing. Oh, Dan. It was a thing. You're embarrassed to us, yeah.

Yep. We're on vacation. And I just thought, oh, a flight of martinis. It'll be a bunch of, you know, normal looking martinis. I don't know why. I thought they would all be sort of clear. But one of them had like a blue blinking light. Oh, God.

How is that a... Number one, why were you in Reno? What were you doing in Reno? It was in the Canadian portion of Epcot Center. Oh, what? I'm trying to connect that in any way possible. That's like the only thing I can come up with is that's the Northern Lights. It was at La Selleier, which is a really good restaurant.

You should not. But there was a flight of martinis and I had to order it. They all teeny. Like, you know when you got a fly to be yours. You put that on a fucking menu. I'm going to order it. What's up? Was it like a little tiny martini glass?

It was little tiny. It was child size. I'm totally into it. Tiny, any, give me anything small. Oh my God. But then there was one that was like chocolate with like a white chocolate straw in it. And it was just like, I was like, well, I guess I'll drink this. Before you expect like three different kinds of gin?

I thought, hey, Bronger. I'm just saying, hey, Bronger, yelling out the one. Hey, it was wronger. Four different. Yeah, like a vodka one, a dirty one, a gin one. But, I mean, you're in Disneyland. Right. Yeah, well, it was world.

What do you expect? Like, you're going to get whimsical lights. Well, I had a different flight the night before at their Brown Derby in Disney Hollywood Studios. Papa's so sad. And that was good. And it wasn't all... Well, they should tell you. If there's a flight, they should tell you if you're getting a white chocolate straw.

And a light. I think it's something we need to know. Uh, this just makes you want to go drinking with you because, Oh, I'm on. Let's do it. Let's do it. I love it. I love, I order weird shit all the time.

Yeah, me too. Just to see what it is. But if you put a fucking flight of martinis on a menu, it's going to get ordered by me. Sorry. You put Capri Sun on a menu. It's going to get ordered. Yeah, of course. Yeah.

But let me, let me put the straw in. Yeah, I'll let you put. A Capri Sun and tonic. Or like a gin, a gin capri Sun. What about what about Capri Sun? But it has to have a side car. I can't, because you want to do the straw. yourself and it has to come in the pouch.

Otherwise, it's just like a gross juice and a glass. Are we going to start a podcast called Kinder Drinking? Because I think that would be a really good idea. I love it. Yeah, I love it. Let's do it. What to serve in tiny glasses at Disneyland. Kinder hollets. Yeah. With Allie and Georgia. No. So, where you guys stand? What is so

let's ask you guys? Oh, do you want to know an alternate ending? Oh, yeah. Oh, yes, please. Okay. Here's my alternate ending. Okay, so what happens? There's some bomb the size of a coffin. I don't fucking know. It's a nuclear bomb. I really. I really. created that bomb. It's a very dirty, dirty bomb. I love that he's also like, I'll touch here.

I'll touch here. Touching things. It's trying to turn off the thing. There's like one shitty dumb light, like a flash bulb light that's red. It kind of looks like a Willy Wonka kind of creation. I love it. It's hilarious. Go ahead.

But to, you know, to recap, they diffuse bomb or whatever. What do you call when you need a bomb? When you defuse it. Diffuse it, yeah. Diffuse bomb. And then next thing you know, they're fucking on a parachute in Cuba or something. I don't know where they are. It's tropical, though.

But I was thinking right after they fuck on the parachute, and he's like, give me a minute search helicopter. Well, I bone this lady, this lesbian. We would cut to Goldfinger sailing from the sky. And then he hits in a field, and he's just an exploding sack of blood and bones. And just because we forget he falls out of a plane, but I want to see that, like, boom.

And it's really sad. And then we see a montage of all the funerals, of all the people who die, and all of their kids crying. Oh, my God. And then we see a couple of the women he boned. like Dink, Dink mournfully walks out of like a Hollywood abortion clinic. Totally. Waps a tear and then gets on a bus and then the credits are off.

Where's the butt? You have to pan to the top where the bus says where it's going. Where is it heading? Oh, back to Ohio. Okay. I don't know. I wish it said London. Like you were going to say what this is what you did to me. From Hollywood? Really good idea. I thought, I thought it would be kind of cool if at the, because you know, it's always a different bond or supposed to be whatever. What if at the end of every movie he dies and that's the reason there's a different bond in every movie? No, that's nice. That's a...

Kills himself? That's a misconception. He's always supposed to be the same guy throughout every movie built. It's just a different, different actor portraying the same man. Oh, that's what I... Yeah, that's what I... Yeah, that's supposed to be the same dude.

Yeah, same man, same codename. Yeah, okay, that's what I thought. Same history. But what if it wasn't? What if instead, like, 007, the number kept getting, like, freed up because this fucking idiot kept... He kept... He's a terrible, terrible spy.

Well, I mean, they do keep passing. the numbers along, don't they? They do if the person dies. His supervisor's like, morale is really low for this position. Who keeps dying? I think 2008 died. 006 died. I think they pretty much all died.

Two died. All cirrhosis. Yeah. Like, VDs, yeah. But they do that, they do that, they do sort of nod to that. They do make fun of his liver in the later movies. That's good. They're like, oh, and too much refined corn syrup, am I right?

Conscious. I mean, corn sugar? I don't know. What did I say? Corns here? No, I'm just saying like high fructose corn syrup is now corn sugar. Yeah. That's what they've rebranded.

It's just like real sugar. It got a rebranding everybody. Like the new bond is going to be gluten-free. And his spy lady is going to get just as much pay as he. Oh, that would be nice. Go for you. But no, back to the whole drink situation. You guys, experts in the field, what is your go-to?

What is your go-to beverage? I'd say, you know what? My go-to beverage right now is bitters and soda, which is conspicuously, does not involve alcohol. Yeah, I was just going to... I've just been on a health kick, you know? Yeah. And I actually find that, um, that...

Yeah, I'm going to have to do 40 minutes on a terminal because they ate. No, you're fine. Oh, God. It's healthy. It's too hot for you. It's too hot to drink, but, um, I, I like an, I like an agroni. I'm a big fan of a groanies. Yeah, that's actually a really good.

We've been drinking those lately. Have you? Yeah. Yeah. My girlfriend's been making them. She's pretty good at that stuff. I'm still learning a little. A Nogroni is just equal parts of three things.

When I speak to you under the table for a second. Well, while they're gone. Georgia. I didn't say I was good at math. She's good at math. I'm not good. I can hear you under the table. I think it's kind of sure that you just threw her under the bus.

No, I'm just saying. It was more to be encouraging. Like, you can be good at Nogroni. Well, all you need is... I will also challenge you to follow that decimal to 33.333. and it keeps going, and so we've still never made a drink, because we don't know that actually. That's good. And then that extra point of a percent is, I don't know.

The secret is who do you get it to? Which ingredient do you give the extra decimilar? The secret is to get on the scale and pour each into your mouth slowly. That's how they do it at craft cocktail bars. What are your favorites? Yours used to be Lefroid. Georgia, what's yours? Oh, I really am kind of sick of cocktails to be totally on the same of guys.

Like, we've had so many cocktails. And I like classic ones, like a really good old-fashioned, like at Coles downtown. Like a great one. I don't want, you know, it's, I don't like to experiment too much when I don't know, at this point, when I don't know the bartender and know that they know what they're doing, you know. There's a place called Evely in Hollywood and the bartender or the bar manager there is so good and everything he just fucks around with is going to be great. So I don't mind that. But I really like beer. I was just going to say, I like beer as well.

I'm obsessed with IPAs right now. I like wheat beers, summary beers. I put on, if I drank beer, I put on so much weight. I am five pounds overweight right now and I should go back to cocktails. You look great. Thank you. So do you. Yeah.

Well, I've been training for 12 weeks. I know. For what? It's paying off. It looks great. I'm going to drop 100 pounds just for fun. That's fun. Sounds like, do you have 100 to drop?

Are you going to cut off one of the limbs? No, I'm like 280 right now. Oh, I don't know that. I got to drop like another 100. Oh, you're going to get that high fructose corn syrup. Well, hopefully, guys, I'll be pretty jacked. So I want to take off my shirt. seduce a lesbian

It's going to take more than that It's going to take off a little force What do you say the four of us Go ahead and seduce some lesbians right now Let's do it Let's find some saggy bottom jod firs out there guys But our rider For nerdish shows

Is Jonah gets a giant bottle of kettle one And I always And I always make sure they have cranberry juice Oh wow Because I like vodka cranberries Oh I see what you're saying And they don't want to get Yeah I correct

That's good Well, I mean we have one rider You don't want a UTI but you're fine with Just liver damage Just get it out No there's nothing wrong with a good vodka soda with lime That's pretty nice Drop a lime in there, make it a Cape Codder

I don't know, I sometimes feel like I used to drink vodka sodas And I feel like vodka soda is just like I would like drunk, please Can I get drunk on ice As little of a hangover as possible? I'm also super lightweight In fact I'm a little drunk now and I haven't had anything to drink So I don't have anything to drink

I don't ever have that problem. You've been drunk since you're 21. Maybe. The first day your lips touched liquor. Yeah, I was born drunk. I'm always just a little tired, too, and I eat like a bird, so I just, alcohol just seeps into me and takes over. Well, I get delighted by day drinking.

Yeah, I'd rather day drink than night drink. Yeah. Especially like a long shadow afternoon, it's a little crisp, and you just got nowhere to go that night, and you just, I'm drunk on. It's got to be the perfect atmosphere, though. Like, it's got to be a little outdoors. but nice and sunny. I don't mean to be the contrarian,

but I hate being drunk in the day. I'm like, what's happening? Everything looks different and weird. It's beautiful, and then you get to go home and take a nap. No, I don't nap. And so I'm like hung over by like five.

I've been drunk during the day maybe like three or four times in my life. Never. I don't even drunk. But I'm just saying I just for some reason it's weird for me. I don't know why. Like I, I don't know. And I'm always crashed at the end.

But I don't know. A beer on a paper. Yeah, during the day. Like, that means that you, that means you're living your life right because you're, you don't have operations right now. You're taking care of everything. Yeah, exactly. It signifies that your day's done early and you just get to relax.

Totally. Where do you stand on pumpkin beer? It's that season. I don't like, I don't, I like beer, so I don't need it to have fucking flavors and shit in it. I like, what if you make a beer float with, like, pumpkin ice cream. Oh, fuck, yeah. Right?

I like what you're talking about. I would only drink beer if you surrounded it also in ice cream. Yeah, Ali, it wants it to be a milkshake. She doesn't want it to be a beer. Yeah, I don't want you to guys. get the impression that I'm super healthy. Like I ate an entire tub of cool whip by myself like a day or two. If you could... Hardly

anti-carbs in that. Don't worry about it. You're fine. It's so bad for you. It's so bad for you. I got it because we had to test like beer floats and stuff and I got it for recipe testing and then I used a scoop of it and then I just scoop the rest in your feet. But where you're going with this pumpkin ice cream and a pumpkin beer. With a shot of

butterscotch schnops maybe? I actually just made a pumpkin milk shake. Pumpkin bourbon milkshake with maple syrup and some spices. it was really, really good. What kind of ice cream? It's vanilla ice cream, roasted pumpkin, bourbon, spices.

Fuck yeah. It's so good. Oh, and a little maple syrup. It'll be on our, it's a recipe we worked on for cooking channel. Yeah, they've been to holiday cocktails. Ten holiday cocktails. So are you guys going to be bumping out to commercial? I'll see you guys when I'm like flipping the channels and they're like,

holiday drink time. Or is it a show show? It's written. It's a written written thing. We just had to turn in a bunch of holiday recipes, but we, like, created them during the heat wave last week. So I was making, like, Glog, and my apartment doesn't have air conditioning, so it's like a hundred. I put a meat thermometer on the table, and it got to 117. And then I was making, like, mold cider.

How did we tie this back into Bond? Sorry, guys. So, we're just wondering. There's got to be a way, though. There's got to be a way. So, well, he gets on the airplane. He's like, three drinks for me. He's drinking for three.

He's pregnant with twins. Yep. And we learn that was bad. An obligation to get some things out to the Bond nerds out. Okay. Okay, do it. Do it. Orson Wells was originally going to play Goldfinger.

Ooh, I would be more interested in that. Yeah, me too. Amazing. Gert Frobe is in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, which Ian Fleming also wrote. Hmm. All right. That's all I have. That's all you have.

He was wearing a flesh-colored band-aid on his hand because he was married at the time and didn't want to take off his wedding ring. But then also, I think, beat his wife or something. Gert? No. John? Connery, yeah. He wouldn't take off his wedding ring for a role? Apparently, also, this is, didn't he have some issue with abuse with his wife?

It wasn't an issue with him. I mean, he had a-old-law that. Roger Moore, who's probably the other longest playing bond, he had an issue with abuse with his wife, too, but he was abused by his wife, which tells you everything you need to know about those two bonds. He's more of the gentleman-swath. You guys might actually like a Roger Moore movie. Which one? Like what? I like that you're, it's almost like you're prescribing us weed or something.

Yeah, I am. I want to get you the right high. I do. I want to get you the right high. This is a purple haze bun Like we don't know anything about it I know so little the marijuana I was like I don't know either

Is that a sweetener? Stevia? I don't know I know that there's two kinds of pot And both of them make me horrified and scared I don't care for pot on that I sound like such a buzzkill I'm sorry guys Just to invite me on a podcast and talk about misogyny

And she's just going to get real I'm real sorry I mean I didn't invite you to talk about misogyny It wasn't that goal. It's fine that it was. It's a natural progression. To be fair. It's just, you know, Goldfinger, everyone's favorite taste.

But you know what? Well, it is nerdist. So if we're going to really get serious, there's going to be some massage going to happen. That's fair enough. That's true. I really, I welcome, I welcome introspection about these things and looking at films of antiquity. Thoughtful introspection. Yes.

Are you saying about comments? Is that your statement? No, in general. I'm saying, I thank you for the opportunity to look at this cinematic relic of massaging. But the gadgets, you guys. Oh, my God. Like in a razor? You put a honing signal in a razor? Also, you guys, they wouldn't have given him his luggage back.

Come on. I know. They wouldn't have given it to them. Well, that's the weird thing about these villains. They're always this gentleman, like, duality. They'll let them sit down and have don't perignon and stuff. I am going to kill you, but I really want a good chat before you go, and you're the only one that gets me. And why they lose his attache case, but not his fucking...

Because his attache case would have had knives in it. All the tools of the trade. Yeah, from the previous movie. But his razor blade is fine. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, why not? What if he had a box cutter on that plane? Man needs to shake.

It actually is September. What is? A shoe bomb. I have something. I like that. Remember when we were talking about lighter before, and I said, oh, this guy's the stocky one? You were right. He's not stocky.

Yeah, he's not stocky. And also his name is Kecklinder. Kecklinder? Keck. Just Keck is his first name. He sounds like a hairball. Yeah. Keck Linder. And he's the only one on set in Miami.

Everybody else was on rare projection in London. Right. He was the only one there. But I just find it fascinating that they went so different with the Felix Liders. Yeah, he was originally played by Jack Lord. You guys remember Hawaii 50 and he's like a real dash. Dr. No, he's wearing basically female cat sunglasses.

It is an interesting choice. He's a strange anomaly. But yeah, Felix Leiter, I don't know. I was disappointed in this Felix lighter. I like the Felix that shows up twice. David Hedison. Yeah, I do too.

David Hedison shows up in Live and Let Die and Licensed to Kill. Yeah. Guys, there's money. I'm not going to take the photo of the guy. No, I checked my watch because I, I parked in a two hour. Simple as that.

I was just thinking maybe we've gone too far. No, I'm taking photos of your guys to Instagram right now. Instagram, I love it. I love it. Get it on there. So guys, fair to say that you are never going to watch another James Bond movie? Absolutely not. I would watch it.

I wouldn't do it alone. Yeah. I wouldn't be the person. Maybe we have a watching session where we drink and watch. What about a live, like a... If we had an MST 3K situation happening. And I were allowed to voice. my annoyance.

You mean with an audience? And ask questions. Then yeah. What about live audience? That is a, that is, it's something Doug Benson and I have been talking about doing. Doug wants, when Skyfall was coming out, he wanted to go back and do like all of them, like, and interrupt all of them. But I don't, he never ended up doing it. If we just did.

If there a way we can do it. Could we just, here's an interesting thing to do. Yes. Maybe we go back with them and record a. commentary track. For Goldfinger? For Goldfinger or a different movie. That's what I'm saying. Press Play now and then we start comment on it. Because I have so many

thoughts about things in life because I'm a woman who has those things. Oh, man talk. Swat. At the very end, it'll just be like one of them. Thank you guys for joining us on man talk. Spank us out.

Spank us out. Can you have me my Terry Cloth onesie. Oh, I'm wearing his brush. His brush and his tearing off onesie. I'm going to jump into a car crusher. There'll be no blood. It's crazy.

On that note, thank you for enduring. No, you guys, this has been so much fun. We really appreciate this. Let's give you guys some plugs. Twitter. Twitter's Ali and Georgia, A-L-I-E-A-N-D, Georgia-L-E-N-D, Georgia-L-A-N-D. Georgia like the state. We're also, we have a podcast called Slumber Party with Allie and Georgia.

Love it. You can find our TV shows, what is it called? Tripping out with Allie and Georgia on iTunes. What is our TV show called? Wait, I've watched it. I know what it is. Do you like it? Yeah, I really did. I saw when you guys went to Alaska.

Yeah, that's cool. It was really good. Thank you. I want to hear stories about that, but that's another podcast. It's called The TV show. It's called Watch Our God Amte. I did watch the show. I want to hear behind the scenes stories, my God.

I want you to go on another podcast where you talk about how manhating our TV show is. Oh, my, it is, man. It is not. It's not. No, I've seen it. I swear God. And then we were on unique sweets on the cooking channel. and you can stalk us on Instagram.

Do it. You're on, you guys, quite a social media presence. We do our best. We're going to gram this. Yeah, we're grabbing this. Are you guys on, as my dad called it on the phone today, pin interest? That's adorable.

I love my dad. No, we're not. No, we're not. Well, he is. Apparently, so is Alley most of the time. I just sometimes hop over there and I see what's cooking. I was looking for good glasses for me. Exactly.

That's a good thing to do. I wish they were more males using. it. You know what I mean? Because you can't really find what you're looking for. Is someone? Well, let me explain. Wait a second.

Let me explain. I do, but let me explain it. It's not under my name. That's the Cosmo. Because it's already taken. My name is already taken. Pinrist. Weird.

Pin interest. But my girlfriend was on it. It's a long story. She doesn't have like a typical Pinterest page, but I as a joke got on there and just put like Christian inspirational sayings and Oprah Winfrey things and connected to her just to see what she'd do it. And I don't think she's still caught that it's me. Man, fun fun.

You better check your pinned interest. Yeah, that is. Pin interest. She's going to start repinning stuff, and you're going to make, wait a minute. Who are you? Finally, someone gets me. But I forget that I have it because I never use it except every week. I get an email update.

Like, your Pinterest weekly update here. All right, guys, thank you very much. Thanks for having us. This has been fun. Yes, it was fun. If you have any comments ready, you can email us. Yeah.

Be nice. Be nice. God, I don't remember. It's bonding James bonding. Bond James Bonding at gmail.com. It's one of the two. Bond Jamesbonding at gmail.com. James bonding pod on Twitter.

Yeah, and I want to thank everybody. There's been so many great suggestions for segments and ideas. We obviously haven't taken any of them yet. Well, but we read everything, even if we haven't gotten back to you or anything, it doesn't go unnoticed and thank you. Thanks for listening. Yeah. And we'll catch you.

Sing your song. Next time. Matt and Matt. Matt and Matt. Chain font. Jets so much trouble with the sexes. Good job. Nice shot.

Now leaving nerdist.com. Hey, this is Arnie Neckhamp from the Improft Fantasy podcast. Hello from the Magic Tavern. I fell through a dimensional portal behind a Burger King in Chicago into the magical land of food, and I started a podcast. Season three has just begun with a brand new adventure to defeat the Dark Lord. If you're a new listener or you've fallen behind season three is a great jumping on point, and we've got great guests like Justin McElroy.

I sat like a fancy college professor. Fake nuts. Rachel Bloom. You all see my collection of men corpses and one woman. Felicia Day and Colton Dunn. You've seen me. have intercourse with a variety of species. It's a bummer.

Andy Daly. You have the members of Genesis listed, but Phil Collins has crossed out and then circled it crossed out again. Yes, I have killed Phil Collins twice. Thomas Middletch. Jesus, I mean, Jazzos,

ruler of the eighth circle. And that's just the beginning. Season 3 of Hello from the Magic Tavern is out now. Listen in Stitcher, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.