James Bonding - INDIANA JONESING: KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL

Episode Date: June 19, 2023

James Bonding presents: Indiana Jonesing! Matt, Matt, and Paul really sink their teeth into those wubble-yous. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt and Matt and James Bonding Podcast. Myra Goreley, Goreley, Mara. James Bonding podcast, it's the James Bonding podcast. It's the James Bonding podcast. Welcome to the podcast discussion about everybody's favorite Indiana Jones movie. I think it's our favorite. It's certainly this podcast's patron saint of James Bond movie. I mean, Indiana Jones movies.

Where am I? Okay. Hey, that's the last snark you're going to hear about Indiana Jones in the kingdom of the crystal skull because we're going to take a measured look at this. I don't know if we are. We're talking 2008's Quantum of Solace. Let's talk about it. Hey, how come the writer's strike didn't affect this film?

Or did it? I'm Matt Goreley. I'm Matt Myra. I'm Paul Russ. Guys, we're talking crystal skull. I didn't know that we'd ever get here, honestly. Really? You know, when we started with Raiders, I was like, that's so far away.

This crystal skull is. I haven't seen it since 2008. Will it hold up? It did not. Now, I'm probably going to be an apologist for this movie, not because I think it's a good movie, but because this is like the James Bond franchise for me or even Star Wars to a certain extent where it doesn't matter if it's bad. I'm still getting the fix. I don't know what it is. Like I love it so much that I just, I don't approach it with critical eyes even though I see the flaws.

And yes, I don't enjoy this one as much as the others, but there's still some things I like in me. I mean, anytime you just get to see Indiana Jones walk down like a temple hallway holding a lit torch and going through like spider webs and cobwebs and stuff, that's always awesome. Yeah, so more of that. Yes, I thought to similarly where I was like, oh, so this is out of four Indiana Jones movies, this is a lousy one.

That's okay. Yeah. It's like the fourth one. They make, sometimes you make a bunch and some are, you know, and this one's a, but there's a lot to, I have maybe like six or seven things in my room. I'm like, I really love that. Yeah. So, yeah. I'll try to focus on the love.

Yeah, no, I'm not here to hate on a movie that has gotten enough hate over the years. I'm here to just sort of digest it after a long period of time. Yes, as well, you should. Y'all be true to yourselves. I'm just warning you right now that I'm probably going to love dial of, destiny, even if it's not good. I'm going to certainly watch it. When you said, I'm going to love dial

of destiny. It's kind of like, oh, I'm going to love dial so and so. I've got an Indiana Jones 1-900 number. If you guys want to call up, it's sexy as hell. It's just to report things that belong in museums. Hey, I saw

this painting. It belongs. It's a Museum. It's the hot tip line. Indiana Jones hot tip line. Matt, what was your, Myra, what was your experience for seeing this? Because you said the last time you watched it was 2008.

It was opening night at the Grove. I was, I went with a bunch of folks from the Apple store, you know. At the Grove. You were working at the Apple store. Fun. Yeah. And we're like, let's finally, let's do it.

Everybody, the Genius bar closed up. All us geniuses went over. we got it lied and we you know it was excitement there were a couple people wearing the hat in lie i believe was the Thursday night sort of screening before the you know the Friday opening was this the first uh work hang outside of work with anything that happens at the grove never I never considered it outside of work got it got it got it got it I was like we all parked in the same spot we all clock I've never worked there and for some reason I feel the same it's you know the grove is like I have now I probably go there

once every two years and it's fascinating to me. Because I worked there for four years. And it was a time. It is kind of, it seems like it'd almost be like vagusy, how it has its own sort of enclosed universe and then you step out of it. By the way, the music never turns off. Even at night. Don't people live there?

Four o'clock in the morning. Or is that just the brand? No, that's just the Glendale. Oh. The brand. Really? Yeah, it never turns off. So we'd be like doing inventory late and like get out at like three in the morning.

And you're just being serenated by Michael Boubley? Bubeleine. Sinatra. That seems like, yeah, like the where they drop the bomb in the crystal skull, like the little spooky. Yeah. Walking through the grove, I'd imagine. I'd have to find a fridge to jump in. They don't build shopping centers in those little towns they blow up, which is interesting.

Because most things are mixed use now. That's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There should be a little main street, you know, with storefronts. I want to see how a two-bedroom for 3,500 would hold up.

What was the, like, group response when people were coming out of the theater? Everyone was confused. I think the movie isn't helped by the fact that the UFO takes off. Well, it's not helped by the fact that it's aliens. You can make an argument for interdimensional beings. And I just learned that that's Spielberg, fought forever and ever. I don't want to do aliens.

I don't want to do aliens. And Lucas Candon went, all right, we don't have to do aliens. Spielberg's, great, I'm in. What are we doing? Interdimensional beings.

That is out of Spielberg's mouth. And then put into the mouths of Indiana Jones and Ox, right? Yeah, yeah. It's hard to write. It's a weird. Ox's first words are interdimensional beings. Yes.

Well, his first coherent. Yes. Jabba Joubi. We, it's hard to sort of figure out why as a society we've decided that that's a bridge too far for the franchise that has already dealt with. The supernatural. I think it's this because, yes, adhering to the like B movie or I mean the serial Saturday afternoon serials of it, it absolutely makes sense. The timeline has moved on to the 50s. we're doing sci-fi, B-movies,

Red Scare, Alien Invasion. But Indy feels like something tied with bringing back the past, not reaching into what is essentially the future, at least, of technology. Oh, you're confused about how galaxies far, far away work. See, they could be a long time ago.

And they have spaces. See, I'm fine with that. If he dug up the Millennium Falcon and there a bunch of jala's in there, that'd make a lot of sense. Oh, man, what if it was like just a bunch of sand people instead of those native

possibly Mayans. I mean, I don't know, yeah, what I'd want because it's like, I don't, if they did another religious artifact that had significance for a religion in the world that a lot of me, like, I would be like, oh, you're going back to the well

with diminishing returns because how are you going to top that? Holy Grail, right? But like the crystal skull, it's a thing. It exists. There is a mythology around it. So, yeah, I'm kind of like, okay, you can't top religious supernaturalism maybe. So going to, I just, yeah, getting out of the religion stuff is good and finding new pockets of supernaturalism.

But just doing the alien thing. Yeah, if it was crystal skulls that were almost like the arc. So something happens at the end, but it emanates from the skull and it's ethereal. We don't actually see a CG little. alien like a you know close encounters. Also like it's hard to like the alien was the alien did the alien like

begrudgingly blow up her brain like because they like they animate the alien to like really lean in and like open the eyes and I'm like now are you is the alien saying oh I know these ruskies they're bad news I'm gonna take care of them for you

or is it like here here's everything I then it's not clear but is it she's getting an overload of information and she's seeing too much and that's what kills her and also the like maybe it doesn't maybe she ascends to a new plan of existence

I mean she does sort of like turn into dust but yeah the right what is she after is also kind of the outside of the alien problem the other well that's I guess the McGuffalo but like the the baddie of like Russians

guys it's it's more complicated than Nazis yeah it's like oh you're this way because of the economic forces you grew up in. Right. As opposed to like your agenda is evil. I mean, I know you could make an argument. Well, Stalin was bad.

Of course, of course. Yeah. The political system of communism is a lot more gray than national socialism of Nazis. Yeah. So when she's getting like, it's kind of like, tell me, tell me everything and stuff. I, like, it's hard for me to line that up with like, like, is that what Soviets? No.

Is that what deep down they're after? Like with Nazism, like when he's like, give me the power. I'm like, oh, they're in for the ultimate power. That's what they're after. That's why they're trying to open up the art. That's what the arc of the company makes a lot of sense. But then when you look at Denham Elliott in Last Crusade, he's just using the Nazis to get the grail. Because he wants it for himself.

He wants. Oh, you mean Walter Donovan. That's what I meant. Yeah, but he wants it for himself. Even Belloc, right, is a Nazi. He's also using their purposes. But so it's not even like with her. She's like, I just want the super brain powers.

The power is the ego and power is the thing, the through line through all those villains. Paul, what was your first experience seeing this film? I saw it in Canada. I was in Canada and there was a movie theater that was I knew it was going to be the theater that played it. and I went to it on a Saturday afternoon because I think... Wow, you waited a whole day. I was, I think I was working that Friday. I was up in Canada shooting something.

And it was the talk of the set. Hey, the Indiana Jones movie's out today. Who's going to go see it? And then I ended up going by myself, going to the Indiana Jones movie at the Canadian theater where they had KFC and Burger King in the concessionary. American and United States. Yeah.

It was also the theater where... Can I get Putin? Yes, of course. Where I saw like Iron Man as well. But I like, it's the theater where I stepped into, it was confusing sort of men's room, women's room. And I accidentally walked into the women's room. And I knew how non-threatening I was that when the two stall doors over.

and women stepped out, looked down at Tommy. And they laughed at me like I was a little brother. But I walked out and I was like, why are there no urinals in the men's room? And then two stall doors opened and the moms giggling at me. Canadian men pee sitting down. That's right. That's why. mayonnaise on French fries and peeing sitting there.

That's what they do. But I haven't told you about my, I went and saw it. And yeah, I was, I thought it was good. good, but I definitely, the stuff that jumped out is like my least favorite parts watching it now. I was like, oh yeah, those were my least favorite parts at the time.

Yeah. Yeah. Which I will list right now. We'll get to it, guys. We all know what the bad is. I think, you know, but I will say, I think, I think, I think Leboof gets a bad rap.

Yeah. He rules. I have to say, I think my esteem for this movie has grown because when I first saw it, having lived through Phantom Menace and trying to tell myself for, I think, even years that that movie was good. This one right away, I was like, oh.

And I was actually, I think the time I liked at least was the first time I saw it. And then as I, like, hit home video, I started to like it more because I just, the shock of it being kind of bad was over. And so I was just able to, like, there was no pressure. It was really low stakes. And so I think that's part of why I enjoy it.

And I do, there's stuff I really enjoy too, but yeah. Crystal Skull showed you who they were and you believe them. That's right. And you said, okay. The irony. Come back. Yeah.

Of Dan Aykroyd's cameo, not being in this one. I know, because he's such a crystal skull guy. He loves a crystal skull. Yeah. He makes a vodka called Crystal Skull. He should have been Mack. He should have been in this. Mac is kind of dressed like his character, Dan Aykroot's character.

Totally. Like the kind of like. He needed shorts. He just had the neckerchief. That's what should have happened. Well, Mac. Oh, he should have been. Yes.

Absolutely. This movie, that's my least favorite. My least favorite character in the film is mad. Me too. Me too. And it's not, it's not Ray Winstone's fault. No, not at all.

It's crazy. And it's unnecessary. It's completely unnecessary character. Even the triple cross is so clumsy that you're not even It doesn't land. It doesn't land. It doesn't land.

Where he like starts a count on his hand. Oh yeah. He's like, I can use my fingers in somebody. That's good. There was a writer's strike issue or just a, a sort of unpolished script because I'm no genius writer but every time I watch this

every time they hit a certain line I go why isn't this like when he first double-crosses in he goes what can I say I'm a capitalist and they pay shouldn't it be they may be communist but I'm a capitalist yeah sure you know and just more clever things or there's one that Indy has too

or when he swings and he falls back in the truck and punches those two guys oh I thought that was gonna go different I thought that I was closer. Yeah. Yeah. It just seems like a marker for what they'll then go back and do clever line. Not clever, but just more character lines that they have in all the other three movies.

Yes. I've never watched three and four so close, you know, Last Crusade and Crystal Skull as we did watching it now. And that might be my biggest complaint about Crystal Skull. I like, I really, you know, we talked last time Tom Stoppern did it pass. whatever the Tom Stoppard sophisticated wit which is actually in Raiders and Tubbo of Doom that kind of like 30s movie speak of like it's simple words simply said

it's not like over complicated or like the so with this yeah the um the uh the the the like the writing is like so bad like and like unartful and when you hear how many versions of this basic story there were i watched a youtube video on all all indiana jones movies and their scripts and all the fake ones that were put out there by people purporting to have the real script like indiana jones in the red scare indiana jones in the fate of atlantis and all this stuff but this one goes all the way back to 94 or 95

and at times it was called like frank deraubant did the original like like serious version of this called Indiana Jones in the city of gods was anything is a much better title i really like darabont i can't i'm gonna i'm about to read that script i downloaded it yeah well it uh they they say right that that was um spillberg loved that script yeah lucas didn't yeah and so they didn't do it but that tells you something right it's got i mean does it tell you something it's so interesting the way george lucas has been portrayed now i mean it just i'm i'm sure yes the track record is such. The evidence is sound is there. But like, I guess it's maybe I'm just looking at this from a post Star Wars sequel trilogy lens where I think those three movies are worse than the

prequel trilogy. Really? I can't go quite that far. I have to wait, wait, those three. The three prequel films, Phantom Menace through to Revenge of the Sith. I think are worst. them, I mean, are better than Force Awakens through Rise of Skywalker. Oh, oh, okay, right on. Because I just, I see. Only because those

movies are reacting to each other. Yeah, it's in ways that are just so nonsensical. They're so counterintuitive. Yeah, it's just like this. It's frustrating. This shouldn't exist like this. No, say what you will about Lucas is they are cohesive to a fault. Yeah, of course. Well, I think anybody, if you love movies,

the thing you most sign up for, or get most excited by is when it's, you can tell it's a vision, a person's vision. And so watching those prequels, you can see it is a person's vision and they're executing what they want. The other sequels that you mentioned

are like committee. And completely incoherent. And I think it's, I wonder if part of that is, I mean, it's interesting that this movie, Dial of Destiny, is going to come out of the same think tank.

Well, the good thing about that is I feel like James Mare. Mangold is enough of a visionary without being an autore. So, yeah, he'll have to probably cow to some of that. But it's not like, I don't feel it's a step down so far as just like they gave it to some workman director. I think Mangold is pretty good. I've really liked pretty much everything of his I've seen.

But I was watching back this stuff and how Spielberg fought and fought this alien thing. He got Darabon to do the script, was really happy with that. And Lucas didn't like it. And they did it Lucas's way and look what we got. And then Spielberg backs out of this one. He was going to direct Dial of Destiny. And then suddenly doesn't. That's a little worrisome.

And what's George Lucas's involvement in Dial of Destiny? It's not. He's not. He's not. Because it's a Lucas film thing. So let's look at the only person who's been involved with all of these movies besides Harrison Ford. It's Kathleen Kennedy. Yeah.

But I think Harrison Ford had a fair amount of. creative input over this. And I was also surprised, you know, he was really reticent to go back to Han Solo, but I saw a super cut of a bunch of interviews where they'd say, would you play indie again? And he goes like in a New York second. I'd love to. Yeah.

I mean, look. In a Queens minib second. In a New Jersey. Faster than you can say land your plane here. In an Alpha Centauri centauri centon. The thing that actually I discovered I find so off-putting about this film in regards to the classic Indiana Jonesisms that they attempt to do is every previous Indiana Jones film we get a bunch of booby traps that are mechanical booby traps. This one we get a tilting floor. That's pretty much it.

The rest of the booby traps are bored middle-aged men. waiting for someone to come. The guys in the walls. They're the little... I was like, what is this? Yeah, I agree. Parkour people in the temple, too. Ernie Reyes.

In the graveyard of the graveyard. Yeah. That is the whole... That part of it is like so nonsensical to me. Like, you know, I buy blow darts in the wall, but they have to be triggered by some sort of ancient mechanism. I don't want to see people. Like, are they, like, taking shifts?

Is it like a thing? It's a clock in. I gotta go. I've got Monday, Wednesday, Friday. I'll see you on Thursday. I bet there was a union thing where it was like, hey, it takes two hours to get into the wall and faster it. And then like, somebody's there plastering the wall over before them. Once you're in, I got a plaster.

All the skilled technicians and craftsmen that have to make that happen. Yeah, that moment, I actually love it. When I saw the theater, I was like, that's cool. I like, but when I saw it, when I see it, I do, it looks like, uh, you. cats on Broadway. It looks kind of like a little like and every

the whisper say every move of theirs looks aided by a trampoline just like because there's so much right momentum I guess upward momentum that couldn't be generated just by a human jumping so they're like anyway

when you talked about the blowdarts too and indie kills people if people like see in a bloodthirsty Indiana Jones they're going to be disappointed with this one. I know. Because he just kills the guy with the blow dart. Yep.

But an accidentally sets a fire of some people in the, um, in the tent. Yeah. Yes. Uh, or, or yeah,

right with the, with the chase and stuff. But, um, yeah, he really doesn't. I mean, he does use a rocket launcher to blow up a truck.

There's got to be at least five people of that. Yeah, that's good. Ooh, good, good, good. Good, good. Good, good. Good. Good.

Yeah. Part of the problem with this and actually from what I'm seeing of Dial of Destiny is it looks like that may be fixed is Harrison Ford is really wooden in this. There's only a few scenes where he feels like his former self in this one. My main complaint outside of like the crubby like dialogue where it is just like that part with the knife when it fell down and it went rip. Yeah, what is that? And he's like, oh shit. What is happening?

There's no payoff to that. Yeah, that's really a strange moment. I thought he was like going to be covered in blood or something like that. Like he cut his fly. Was it like a comic moment where he cut his trousers in the crotch or something? And yeah, when you compare like the scene in the blimp where it's like, I always wanted time with you. And what you said was awesome last time where he's like, well, I'm here.

You got my attention. That's so much better than the scene when the three of them all get together. And it's just like sitcom yelling. This like fucking like, Dan, you said, but. You told him to get bad. That is all bad. And then the woodenness is... In fairness, I did laugh really hard when they're in the quicksand that isn't quicksand.

Quick sand is so funny. I know. I was just going to say that. He's so good with the snake. He immediately says, why didn't you make him finish school? Yes. Yes. I love the quicksand.

Call it a rope. Say it's a rope. But he's old Indiana Jones there. I don't mean old and age, but the older version. He's so alive. there. What is going on? I think some of it has to do too with he's so gruff and grumbling in this that they had to ADR so much of him that all that beginning scene of the way you're laying into those wall use is all ADR. It's weird. I started cooking up a theory because I was trying to like, why is this feel so wooden?

It's the hot theory. It needs two mics. I think that it's, yeah, after they shot it, they. They wrote. realized maybe there was some inconsistency from scene to scene. And so they just put down a couple sessions and he just did every line. Yeah. ADR. I was trying to look for it where it ever seemed authentic. It seems like all of it is, which means it could just be the result of whatever his voice was for the two days he did ADR, whatever mode or his brain.

brain. Whatever strain he was so funny. Yes. It's funny then because of, you know, Blade Runner when he did the narration for that, it was like the studio executives thought he was stoned. They like wrote memo notes.

Are like, is he stoned? Why is he so groggy in these narrations? But this is more of the thing. I'm like, what was going on? He just went into ADR and it's like that fucking part. I'm sorry,

but it's like what do you? Yeah. But it was like, you're a teacher? Like, Shia LaBoff is alive. Part time. Part time.

I think he must, have been in that because he was also in that phase of not wanting to do publicity. He was notoriously cranky and it was less a bit back then. He's alive. I've watched a lot of promo he's done for this new movie and he's happy to be there. He seems like proud and that's why I think we're going to get a much better performance out of him this time. Maybe stuff needs to be a he can recognize if something's fresh or not because that quicksand scene, that could be like a tired trope, but then like figuring out that it's about a family arguing and you have to lie to your dad that it's actually a rope so he grabs it.

That's all great. His whole thing of like, well, actually it's not quicksand. It's really good. Yeah. That might be the best. That might be the best scene in the movie. I know.

It's strange. And that's also a strange scene because it's one of the most obvious sets in the movie. That's another thing. The cinematography in this film is so overlit. I'm not a huge... Did you watch the Disney plus strange? Yes, I did.

Me too. It's still. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. You know, Janice Kaminsky is a genius in his own right for saving Private Ryan and making things look old and, you know, desaturated.

Tom Hanks saved Private Ryan. That's right. Actually, it's a void collapse. It's not as dangerous than most people think. But in movie like this, it's just that kind of style. It looks, the backgrounds are just as highly lit as the foregrounds. And think of Raiders in all the shadows that took place in that movie in Temple of Doom. And I think with this, with Crystal Skull, you really miss the shadows and you don't even realize it.

Yeah. You sort of see it from the open of the movie when it starts on the CG gopher. Yeah. And you're just like, oh, God, what are we? What are we doing here? You know, because it opens, you're like, oh, what's the mountain going to be? It's going to be great. And then it's this, you know, fucking, the gopher gets up and they love this gopher so much. They do it a bunch of times. Is that a mountain molehill joke, do you think? Oh, maybe.

Good question. I mean, those first 10 minutes are like electrifying. And I go, James Mangled, James Schmane, there's no way he would ever shoot the opening scene of these 50s kids and these army guys driving next year. It's so alive. Yeah. And I was like, oh, I'm not.

going to miss Stevens Philberg no matter what in this next Indiana Jones movie because that stuff rules. But do you think that was in the script

originally? Because none of that is plot. That's the only thing that you need is those Russians pulling up to the base. But I guarantee you

Lucas is like we probably need a 50s fast car in here. And he got Spielberg to do it which I love it too. I'm glad they did. You never see American graffiti? That's funny.

I didn't. Yeah, I haven't thought about how this opening is like American graffiti cup. Harrison Ford is in the trunk there. Yeah, right. But he should be wearing a white hat instead of the brown hat.

But like that was a, that was so Spielbergy, like the way that he shot that car chase slash race slash whatever because there was so much frenetic movement with it and so much tracking with it. And I was like thinking in my head when I was watching that, I was like, oh, give that to another director. And they're going to like lock the camera off,

maybe pan with the car at some point. I bet Mangold does take a play from Spielberg there because these are as big a part of these movies as anything. And I bet he would recognize it's like a director doing a Bond film going, I got to have these certain tropes. It's almost a trope of the movie to have these three-beat camera shots where you're near field on something and then you rack focus back and then there's something else to look at. but in this movie, I noticed there's all of these Spielbergian versions of those,

but all the actors are a little slower. The camera feels a little slower. So you notice them a little bit more, you know. Yeah, that buildup all the way until Indiana Jones's entrance. He goes, yeah, the W is that you're like, that's when like it hits the brakes. And then you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa. And that's why it does feel like it's partly on Indian, on Harrison, four shoulders. And then it gets even more underlined, I think, when Chia LaBuff comes in.

And you can see he's coming in with the energy of a young man in his 20s who's so stoked to be acting in a major motion picture. But the casting is so bizarre along with that because Ray Winstone, um, topsy-turvy guy, Jim Broadbett. And then John Hurt. Yeah. That's like three similar types of actors, not, you know, not from the, the, country actors. Yeah. Yeah.

And so they all kind of like feel and look the same. And then yeah, you don't get a, with Mac, it's like, or we were going to answer this question with Oz, right? Like, is he supposed to be Henry Sr.? Is he supposed to be Ravenwood, Marion's dad? Yeah. Because the way Shia LaBuff reacts to, not that it was like on set, they thought it was. I'm just saying like, they make such a big fucking deal out of Oz.

Like when Shia LaBuff is like, you know, with him again and his eyes are filling up with tears. It's like, Oz is his back. It's like, who the fuck is? He raised you? No, I guess he kind of did. They say that briefly. But I feel like that's Shia LaBuff going, hey, I got these new acting chops. I'm going to apply him to something that doesn't merit.

I'm with John Hurt. Yeah. And Oxley's just... I cast John Hurt to not say anything. It is so dumb. I mean, doesn't it feel like... It just feels like they wanted Sean Connery and... What's his face in the movie?

Marcus, bro. Yeah. But they couldn't have them. Well, he was dead. Den on my way. He was dead. If Mac had been Marcus, right? They probably wanted John Rees Davies.

too. Interesting. But I bet he would have done it in a heartbeat. No, he said no. Come on. I swear to God. I swear to God, he said, no, they asked him. Really?

Yes. If Mac had like, then Marcus Brody, then that would have all been cool that he's like. I think Brody would be Oxley. He's more the academic and sympathetic to Marion. Yeah. But it seemed like Oxley was supposed to be like Marion's dad because that would explain sort of like why Mutt needs to get to him and care so much about it.

Why didn't they just make him Ravenwood? Yeah, it's really weird when you watch it that way. You're just like, this should be Ravenwood. Didn't they kill him off in Raiders? Like, isn't he like dead in Raiders? Or is it just never brought up? No, I don't think he's. Does she say he understood it so well?

And no, I'm thinking of Sean Conner, he's saying, unfortunately she kept an illness from me. Yeah, and Raiders, does she say that he's dead? Because it could also be, you know, a little hand waving where you go, he disappeared. And then, oh, no, he's long lost.

Or do they just feel like they couldn't get an older American actor to have the stature they need against the Harrison Ford? Oh, no way. Who would that be? Who would you cast at that time? that time? Because that would be that would be an amazing part

because you're like, oh, it's Indiana Jones's father-in-law in this fun family story of the mom and the son is he alive. And then, yeah, that Marcus

Jim Broadbent is like, well, the Marcus Brody thing too in the statue and he gets hit and the head falls off? Yeah. I don't know what they were.

Is that a tribute? I don't know what they were trying to say there. Oh, wait, say that again. When the statue,

when the car runs in a statue and his head falls off and how is that like? I don't know. Paying the man homage. I'm trying to find out if Abner, Ravenwood died.

There should have been a statue of Sean Connery also right there and their heads fall off and roll together. Start to kiss. It's been a tough year. Yeah. I'm trying to

Because if he's not If Ravenwood's not dead There's no earthly reason I know To not have included that character As ox Mm-hmm Like

I can't even wrap my head around Why they wouldn't do that Yeah I can't It make it a lot more sense Why Marianna Is bopping around in those Oh

Hey let's add another gripe is not what you're doing it. He is said to be dead when Indiana and the Nazis come to Nepal where Ravenwoods live in 1936. The novelization details he died in an avalanche in 1936. Hey, that can be waved away. That's true. They never found the body.

It melted. Here I am. But yeah, was it said in the movie? I feel like it was implied. Huh. Yeah. That sounds more right than that it just is. Oh, he's alive and bopping around right now.

But I was because when I said one more gripe is just when they go to the jungle and stuff, really only have like two looks in this movie, right? You like, you get the jungle and then like the jungle. The opening Nevada. Yeah. but it's not as um forget about looks it's more just like it's not a globe trotting the other one's kind of zigzag to napal to Morocco to all these different countries yeah but once they get to Peru they're kind of they're there temple of doom's a bit that way where it's mostly

India except for Shanghai it's got two two only two places right yeah and the temple of doom I thought the skulls kind of had that um touch of what the Sakara stones have of like you get them together. You'd need to collect them together to it. Like so it seemed like they took a little bit of that they, uh, mixed with, um, watching crusade next to Crystal Skull also pointed out how much the end of Crystal Skull is like the end of last crusade just not done as well. Because no Raiders or Temple of Doom ends with that kind of like prolonged hero versus

villain at the center thing, you know. Yeah. And also like what a bummer of like, you know, we're at. Marion and Indy's wedding and when we cut to the crowd all we have are John Hurt and Jim Broadband to like recognize like he couldn't even pull a John Reeves Davey cameo I mean is that that priest that marries him's real weird right he's pretty weird the way he kind of you know now kiss the bride Matthew the ring he's into kissing yeah that's like why most reverends get into that line of work yeah

They love watching They get to talk about kissing Well let's Let's talk about the opening scene Because this is very divisive Especially I love the chase through the warehouse That's what you're talking about right

I I love the whole opening Through to the fridge I have to say Through to the fridge You don't love the fridge No I like the fridge I don't have a problem with it

It's crazy It should have bounce so much Seriously, that's like the problem. It just jumps too many times like down the thing. It should just be kind of a thing that launched him, landed and skidded. Thuds and skids for a while. Yeah. It's just when he steps out of that.

I think that's when it, the, yeah, it goes too far. But I would find it. You expect animated birds to be around. The thing I really do like about it, regardless of the comedy of the fridge, is this opening scene that ends with indie walking up a hill. and actually a really good moment of CG, the billowing mushroom cloud. And it's just telling you,

Indiana Jones has entered the atomic age and you're in for something different. I thought that was really well done. I like most of the fight in the warehouse. The Mac stuff really does trip it up. Yeah. I also, I like the once he arrives at the bomb. Oh, oh, on the launcher.

When he's getting a question, and he's wearing that cool white t-shirt. I love all that. That stuff is all cool. It's funny how we thought of him so much older and he was only, what, 65? He was a young 16. I mean, we're only saying only because there's a movie

coming out in two weeks. But when you watch this movie and everybody, you're all like, well, okay. And now we look back and it's like, it's almost like he looks more like Last Crusade indie in this than he does now. Yeah. But I was saying all that stuff is good to say

that the warehouse chase I really don't like because it suggests what will become a later problem in the jungle chase which is just like how long is this fucking warehouse like there's just no geography like spelled out

like in Temple of Doom when we see that warehouse oh and Raiders I mean Raiders yeah it's very big that's true that was when the geography was placed they should have had that old guy

yeah it would be like just like a wipe his brow And it starts to put the What do you think about the Russian heavy Not Kate Blanchett But the Igor Jijinkie actor who plays I don't know what the character's name is But he's like suitably physically

The part But he kind of talks like this This is a This is what does he say? Like you've been here, he is Something and it's just There's something he has like strange little Beattie crossed eyes

and it just... Yeah, has he been anything else? Is he a stock? No, but there's another guy within the Russians that actually survives till the end

and he's in the final scene that you'll see play a Russian a lie. He was on Deadwood. He's in the Miami Vice movie. The thing at the beginning, too, in the warehouse, when he gets the gunpowder and it like magnetized

towards whatever they're looking for, it felt like he had, a plan that he didn't have. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. And to that, it's the only

prologue of these where the thing is the thing for the rest of the movie. You don't get the fun of like, what you guys love about the Bond movies of a unrelated adventure. The fact that it is the crystal skull they're going after and it is the same

villains. I mean, I know Belloc shows up, but it's in a different context for a different adventure. Yeah. So if it had been somehow, Does it have to be that the original crystal skull that you put back on that headless body? Or could it have been another crystal skull from another alien slash interdimensional being? Or what about just one of Dan Aykroyd's bottles of crystal skull vodka?

You know what happened is they probably combine into one being and then say that it was delicious. And then leave the planet. What is the true legend of the crystal skull? It's just that... There is the... Yeah, and that they do... They don't have machine marks or tool marks. So it seems like that no one knows how they could have manufactured.

Yeah, there's the famous Mitchell Hedges skull, I think, is the one that... Was he the guy that discovered? I mean, they've all been debunked, obviously, but... No, no, that's not. true. I don't know if you're familiar with Crystal Skull Vodka. Oh, those... That exists. Wait, they've been debunked as like they weren't really

truly... They're hoaxed. They're man-made hoaxes, all of them. So there's never been a found... That's what you think. They could be alien hands. You don't know? You don't know if aliens are making... Man, I never dug in deep enough to know that it's like the equivalent of like a UFO sighting.

Yeah, it is. It's like basically Q-Non-level thinking of people that there was a real bunch of people that are like crystal skulls, whoa, or like, you know, Contrails and 9-11 troopers. I thought it was just- Contrails exist. It's just water vapor, but they exist.

Okay, that'll give you that. Crystal skulls exist. That's true, too. How'd they do that? Like, how'd they build the pyramid so great? How did, like, when you find it, that's so, I'm blushing. I feel like a fool. I feel like a Mac.

I think you are a Mac. I yeah I don't I also like I don't I think I don't like the Mac character just because I don't there's nothing redeeming about the character they also really jump you in like don't worry yeah you already love this guy right because they have such a history they've fought together so much and again I really like the actor way Winston but he's getting I don't even like him enough to go yeah and this is yeah well the worst part about him, let's agree. It was Robbie Coltrade.

I'd be way more in. Yeah. He triple crosses Indy at the end. All he cares about is gold and getting what's his. Indy tries to save him. And inexplicably, he just goes, Jonesy, I'll be all right.

And then he just lets go. Don't forget the fact that he winks. What is he do? Why? I think he's going to go to the new dimension and become some sort of a god. You think he thinks that? I think he thinks that.

Then why is he trying to get out of there in the first place with a bunch of treasures? You got to grab the gold so that when he goes to this new dimension. Where they don't take gold. They only take crypto. He can barter. Crypto skulls. Indiana Jones and the crypto skull. Oh, boy.

Yeah, the... Indiana Jones is a crypto, bro. You regret buying that Rolex now, don't you? So Mac, right, I guess if he had been, it's a little like what, with Cape Blanchett's character, it's like the look and the idea of it is cool, but then there's not enough. And it sucks for you bonding guys.

I think if Cape Blanchett had been cast of this, she would have already been a bond villain in the Sam Mendes, like, right? I know. She is so perfect. She's an acclaimed British actress. It's not too late. It's not too late. And it's time we have a female villain again.

It's been once again. When I was watching Tar, I was like, she should be a pilot. I know, me too. It's so cool. Me too. And she's good in this. It's just, I do like this character. You know?

Yeah, she seems with it. She also was able to squish that very, real aunt. It was so real I saw the gunk fall on the lens. Yeah. Yeah. Well, she's really laying into those wubble yews. Did you know? Yeah. But in a way

that is like not endearing. Also, she has this really heavy Russian accent, or excuse me, Ukrainian. And then she just slips right back. I know she's Australian. But she has, then she goes into like British. Will she go be chasing you forever? Dr. Jens.

And she uses those collegiate oes that British people use, which I never hear in a Ukrainian accent, but maybe I'm wrong. Maybe she's just pronouncing the name the way she's heard it. Yeah, maybe. You know? Growing up. That's how people have said it. So I'm going to say it like that. We get all that.

Immediately, you find out it was Roswell. Right. It was a recovered body from Roswell, New Mexico. go. I love Harrison Ford's in that scene too where he's like, oh, you're talking about that mess you guys had in 47? Oh, yeah. One said anything and blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. I was like, oh, okay, that's good. But then they have this thing.

Neil Flynn comes in as an FBI issue. Who's like drumming up a red scare with Indiana Jones. I like that stuff. I like all the reds care stuff. This is interesting. Well, because the next scene is immediately word has gotten back to Princeton. Marshall College, Matt. I'm sorry. Marshall College Fictional Marshall College

Fictional Marshall College where one day he'll be the associate dean with bigger letters Yeah I guess I mean They get wind of it He has to leave his job

And Go hang out with Who's the guy He's going to go In Germany Leipzig Someone's in Leipzig Yeah

But when he's getting On the reference to something Getting on the train That's when Mutt Roller That's when the movie kicks into high gear. And we see James Dean from the wild punch. Oh, no.

Yeah, we see Marlon Brando. But this was originally going to be a daughter. Right. It should have been. Doctor, if it was mutt. Doctor. I'm pointing at Paul. You can't see it, but I'm pointing over at Rusty here.

What was the reason they changed that I forget? Lost World. That's right. Spielberg just directed the Lost World and Jeff Goldblum had a daughter. Oh, and David Kept. broke both of those. So why would I have a daughter in this next movie? You know that only one character can have a daughter.

You can't do it. I'm Steven Spielberg. I couldn't make it believable that two characters and different franchises have daughters. I get a boy. I love the motorcycle chase might be my favorite part of the movie. That's good. I agree. And that is now my favorite Wilhelm scream.

Yeah. Because that fits that dude. Yeah. It's all practical. too, that whole scene. Yeah, and it has just like those really fun, like near, it's like real life animation, just like seeing somebody's feet, like go on the ground and kind of skid along with the bonus,

like real life stuff like that is so cool. It did make me clock, though, I was like, oh, there hasn't been usually a half hour into an Indiana Jones movie. There's been like the lull. Three rip roaring. Oh, sorry. Like the warehouse thing into the... I'm sorry.

A nuclear bomb went off in this movie and you're like, not enough action. Yeah, I don't know. It just doesn't feel like, I guess it's probably... Here I am defending Crystal Skoll now. Ah, we did it. It doesn't feel like maybe an Indiana Jones seat. Like with the motorcycle thing, I'm like,

oh, this feels like Indiana Jones. Maybe because the warehouse, I just don't know how. how it's like turning and and Indiana Jones thing works for me most when I'm like seeing the physics play out. You're like exactly know how it's all operating. I think it suffers. The movie suffers from the previous three movies being good being good and so entrenched in

the 30s and 40s. Yeah. And again, and like you're so you feel it. And like you think of Indiana Jones and you think of the 30s and the 40s and you think of the Nazis. You think of World War II. or the lead up to World War II. And then when you go to this one, you jump all of World War II.

I know. And end up in the 50s. And then they make reference to how cool his adventures must have been during World War II. That's the insult to injury. It's jarring enough to see Indy in the 50s, but then to add aliens in. Let me run a hypothetical. Sorry, I'm sorry. Let me run a hypothetical by you.

It's the same story. It's a different cinematographer. It's had two more drafts of a polished script, say, by Tom Stoppard, uh, your jazz butterworths, whatever. Okay.

You got Harrison Ford, who's really up on his game and he's alive. He's taking a weed break. He's having some antioxidants. Or he found a new strain that really makes him alert and ready. Oxley's Abner Ravenwood, played by an American. Mack is not in the movie.

In the movie, truly. But he does have a comparison. companion and it's solid. Yeah, okay. Yeah. Yeah. And the climax doesn't involve aliens per se, but more of a interdimensional mysticism.

Would that be enough to make this a good movie? One thing I'd add to that. And it's the thing we haven't brought up and it should have been the very first thing. I just remember when this movie was first announced, there was a lot of promise about practical filmmaking. Yes. That's the big, that's the biggest thing in this. movie. I'll add something to that too.

Because they CGI things that don't need to be CGI. Like that whole obelisk thing looks CGI, but that whole thing is full size, or maybe it's a reduced miniature or whatever, but it's practical. And then they like... It's insulting that they use

CGI and are breaking their backs to do a cool action sequence. Yeah. And then it's more insulting. But it's bad CGI. I will say that the monkey's pompadour was practical. Yeah, oh, and the swinging vines is obviously removed.

So would you think that then do we have a good movie? Yeah, I was on board and then you said the thing about the vines. Oh, would we have a good movie or is the whole thing kind of flawed from the beginning? That's a hard question to answer. I think I'd be in on it. You'd have a much better movie. Yeah, and I think that would be maybe enough for me. I mean, that's a lot to ask.

Yeah. Which is to say they had it in their hands. They could have pulled it off. Yeah, well, I believe Steven Spielberg is still the man in 23 right now. He's still making great movies that, like, are really entertaining. I wish he gets to. So it's like he's in the zone during Crystal Skull, too. So I imagine he's bringing his game.

Yeah, what else is he making at this time? I think it is, like, if the story was more interesting. And imagine how different it would it be if that last chase was just, like, really filmed in a jungle on like with a army patrol. And some of it was. That's the crazy thing. I don't need it on the side of them. In Hawaii.

But they shot that in the jungle in Hawaii. Some of it. I know, but I'm with you. But what's cool about like, Raiders or something is like, you can tell they might have come up with a stunt because of what the earth was giving them.

And they had to like operate around that. There's just some times like where the car goes up above the people so they can look down and I'm like, well, that's not really how. I can tell you're. putting this together. Now that's cheating and I don't like cheating. The CG ants are also a bridge too far

for me. Yeah, it's also, it's not just that they're CG but that they carry people. Well, ants are very strong. I don't know. They're familiar with the aunt man. I'm familiar with Dave Matthews's ants marching and it doesn't say anything about that. Did it do you that sequence.

Ding, ding, ding, ding. Indy wakes up in the morning. Yeah, can you not just show like the practical ants because it's sort of like the ADR with Harrison Ford once you establish one how it sounds It's got to because like it'd be cool if you just saw some real fire ants But they don't make them that big so right there's no ants that big are there maybe maybe there are I don't know I just found out the crystal skulls are all fake I'm sorry

to dash your hopes. I know. Dasch my hopes. Upset. And the ants were a holdover from Last Crusade, I believe. Oh, they had the Antsame. Or they were from like

the first 94 version or something. But they've been sitting around for a while. And I think it's also kind of a nod to the atomic age movies of like giant ant you know. Yeah, them.

The movie them. With the idea of you know, yeah, the ideas being held over and so like Temple of Doom has some sequences and stuff and ideas being used

the when I was up in Canada I was in a I love you Beth Cooper which is directed by Chris Columbus and I so he wrote the draft for part three. The much derided yeah yeah yeah

and I asked him about it and he said something that I later saw in an interview so I don't feel like I'm telling tales out of school or whatever. He said, oh, is my experience learning? You can't try to take everybody's ideas and make them all work together. You got to like cut some stuff and later argue why you had to cut it rather than try to get it all in. Interesting.

And so it sounds like anything. It was just like, oh, somebody who really wanted to do well. But did you, do you know the elements of his story? They are bat shit crazy. There's like a monkey? A monkey king that comes to life, like monkey god. Yeah, because this would have been written around like 86 or something. I'm still, what's the problem?

But the last thing I was going to say was, so the weekend after it came out on Monday, we were talking about it. And he was like, oh, the dart blow dart thing. He was like, we did that in Young Sherlock Holmes. That's right. I remember that. That's right. Yeah. And he wrote that.

He was like, oh, I just, I noticed that that was used. And he wasn't ripen or anything. It was just, uh, so that he acknowledged. Interesting. I invented blowing the blowdart back. But, uh, yeah, the, um. Also, when that person screams, have you seen home alone? I invented the scream.

I'm Wilhelm. Oh, in the category of stuff that I think is cool and I liked in this. Um, I do like the, um, I do like the. three waterfalls joke. Do you? Do you? Oh my God, guys. I'm trying to get this back on a train of positivity.

That's one of my least favorite. It's only because, A, they've already done a big waterfall thing. And how many times am I to believe that they can just fall these giant waterfalls and they're all of them fine. Oz is very strong. Oxley is very strong. Can you not see that? I buy a nuclear refrigerator.

on his flesh. Well, I mean, the whole, like, what did you, what did you think of, what did you think of Marion driving because she knew that she saw the tree hanging from the cliff and... I'm fine with that. Really? I just give her all you can give her because she's not even in this movie enough for me. She gets asked to do too much, which is like, she has to during an action sequence, fall back in love with Indiana Jones, which is like, some of the corneous moments.

But she's like, you're never out of it. And then he's like, I'm going to get out. And then he leaves out. And she's like, that's like, that. That bastard. Yeah. You really hate that part. That's fascinating.

You think they were kind of trying to echo the Henry Jones rescuing his dad scene where they argue and then he kills the Nazis. I like it in theory. Oh my God. If that scene actually worked on me, I would go bonkers. It just like, because I haven't seen enough of Marion to know who she is that she somehow went from point A to point Z here. Well, it seems like she went from point A to point A. like the point B was just having the sun and being off and then she comes back and she's immediately back where she was which I was like okay she's always loved them they've always loved each other

when he says because I never you never let me win an argument like that that line sort of goes this is what our relationship is like we're going to be yelling at each other wouldn't it be this occurred to me though wouldn't it be because what we love about Marion is you know she's she kicks ass so when you see her start falling for Indy, maybe it takes away from her kick assery? You're right. What if Indiana Jones was like, oh, I missed out? What am I doing?

Not Marion kicks ass and does the like, hey, so long, buddy. Yeah. And then he's like, oh, I fucked up. She got out of it. I forgot about that. You're right. She's an adventurer. She should have been in my life this whole time.

Oh, my God. She was so edgy. It would have been so much better if she had the rocket launcher at the end. No, when they're in the car chase, Indy was driving and was next thing. Yeah. And then she comes out and goes, look out. You block your ears and then fires up there.

She was so cool in that first movie. She's maybe one of the coolest heroines. They recreate the little fun when she's gagged. It's just so funny to see her talking. Yeah. But yeah, so I just feel like she's got to make a big jump. They just need to maybe one more scene of her world. I think they're going to do in this Dial of Destiny film.

About their marriage. About their marriage and mutt. Is she dead in Dial of Destiny? Do you want to know? So it is answered. Whoa. You have spoilers. I do know.

I don't know what the context of it is, but I know. Okay. Well, I don't want to. Well, I won't say anything, but other than to say exactly every spoiler. No. They are not hiding. They're not hiding. They're not hiding.

wink twice if she's alive. Do you really want me to? Yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. And now could you wink twice if mutt is mentioned? That I don't know.

Okay. He did not wink. They have to mention something. I hope he's finishing school. That would be funny. How many years later is 15 years later? He's getting his fifth Ph.D. So he's probably like got his own.

motorcycle shop or fencing school. Maybe he invented a brand new motorcycle engine. Speaking of dial of destiny, this is Elon Musk. Today's the 15th. The LA premiere was last night. And I'm seeing online people that got to go to that and go, we should have really dug in because I think if we would have contacted them, they would have let us go. And do you know who was there? Harrison Ford.

Yeah. familiar What's Marianne's name? Karen Allen. Karen Allen. All the actors in the movie, Spielberg, Lucas, and then John Williams

came out with an orchestra and played music. Spielberg and Lucas were there? Key Kwan was there. Like live tracking? I've never seen them. Just before the movie they played.

That'd be cool. Where was it? Was it at the Gromans? Sorry, the T-C-L. I'm not sure where it was, but we could. Was it at the L-CAP? It's a Disney film.

film? It might have been. Yeah. I think we could have got, we could have got in on that. I rarely have, rarely, rarely, rarely have phone well, but I had phone wall. Yeah. I, yes. That's interesting.

I know somebody who went to like a, I think I might have referenced this title last one, but it's true. They went to like a cinnorama screening of how the West was one. And they sat in front of Spielberg and it was like, three guys in their 20s who went to see this movie that's played. And he just thought that was so cool. He just struck up a conversation with these young movie lovers. I was like, that guy rules. That's amazing.

But this is probably the last time that entire group of people will be together. Yes. Possibly. John Williams is what 90? I mean, unless at John Williams funeral, probably they'll get together. Folks. People die. I once got a major trubs with a Twitter once when Vern Troyer yeah

yeah yeah yeah yeah and when the day he died I tweet is like oh now I feel so bad for praying to God last night that Vern Troyer would die I got people are very mad yeah the I thought it was obviously silly. In your mind, is that something you had always been asking for? Every single night. Every single night I do it. I'm like, oh, no. Not long after my daughter was born, I put up this sort of famous picture of like nude,

but you can't see anything. Klaus Kinski holding a baby, Natasha Kinski. And he's just so scary looking. It's a black and white picture. I put it up as a joke. Here's me and my daughter. And never had heard that he was like a. horrible father to her and abused her, anything like that.

Oh, God. And all my comments just are like, what are you thinking? What? Is this real? Is this a joke? And I was like, I immediately took it down, but I had no idea. And I had put that up prior, like, years ago because I just thought it's such a, he's so creepy looking.

No, you know what? You should reply to them. I'm sorry, but aren't both of them famous? Why wouldn't you want to aspire to be them? They're better than us. Yeah. Dad, daughter goals, they're both famous. Dad,

book, dad, girl, dad. What? Oh, and the Adams Family 2 movie, Wednesday says the... Designed by a... Ken Adam... No, no, the animated one that came out of a couple years ago. No. The Adam Family 2, where they go on the road.

Wednesday refers to the Salem Witch Trials, the women who died there as hashtag squad goals. Punch up joke if I've ever heard. it. Yeah. Yeah. I liked it. That's funny. Was that you? Did you do that one? I didn't. Oh, I was like, did you do punch up on it? No, no, no. Whoever did I want to shake their hand. You know it would be a fun exercise is to take Crystal Skull and we all do a pass.

Do a pass. At least on the, oh, that I thought I had more time with that. What was the thing? Yeah, I thought that was closer. What? That's so funny that you guys are all annoyed by very different things. Like that didn't bother me. It's just wasted real estate. I was bothered most by the people in the walls. I love the waterfalls.

You love the waterfalls. I like the fridge. Oh, I will say the spaceship coming up and the alien stuff. It actually doesn't, that didn't bother me when I saw it. The saucer looks good. Like that and the nuke bomb are really good. Yeah. And I also just love the color of the temple, how it's like,

sunlit and kind of like, yeah, Peruvian. Yeah. I think it all looks cool. I can't believe that that native tribe didn't put up much of a fight with the Russians. Well, that was another thing that they just kind of gloss over, that the Russians just mow them down and then they give one shot seeing all the dead, native. Yeah.

And it's just not like, it feels a little bit like, we're coming up on Killers of the Flower Moon here. Maybe the real story here is not about. A treasure raider and some communists, but... Cut to a couple of native guys that are like, oh, thank God I wasn't working Thursday. Yeah, I know. Or the guys that are in there now for the next shift, they're like, ooh, better to be in here.

Cramped, at least I got a transistor radio. It's just for seven. Probably not jump out when they have guns, huh? What else? I mean, what else? I mean, what else? The house, the house is done, you know, not far away. Indy's house that he pulled up to.

Yeah. Yeah. The brick house. That's his house, huh? Yeah. It's pretty. I like how in the other ones, I guess he's tired. America looks like Ilstri studios and stuff.

Like to see it to, uh, what a fucking nitpicking right now I have. The American shots look too American. I know. But, uh, well, because it's also supposed to be what East Coast. We don't know quite what state. in, right? It was shot in Connecticut, right? New Jersey.

I think it was shot at Princeton, wasn't it? But it was the first Indiana Jones movie that was shot all in the United States. Oh, that's right. And they shot someone in Downey. Yeah, with that jungle chase is when I feel like, oh, something is really comes out of people had to go and stay at a hotel for three weeks and only focus on the digital, not to go back to that, but just like that is where it most feels. feels like, oh, I wish you guys had gotten out of the country and been okay with being away

from your families for a few months. What is it about the Shilabuff sword fight and vine swinging that is so off-putting? Well, it's really the vine swinging. I could stomach the sword fight. The sword fight actually is not bad because it is at least set up. The worst part for me, though, is the shoe when he stretched between the two cars because it looks, doesn't look. natural. It looks like a video game.

I do like the thought of Marion being a like stage mom, but for fencing where she's, you know, always like running him through, you know, mom, I'm just getting out of the car. Rapaste. You know, whenever I would see Shailabuff

at my gym, he would be working out, I swear to God, in jeans. And work boots. He lives now. He lives in Pasadena, not far from the Indiana Jones house. Oh my God. Yes. I've seen him walking outside his house.

Have you seen him? Walking outside the idiot. No, he's just going by there. I fucking blew it, man. Well, he did. Remember he said he talks some shit in an interview? Yeah. Ford and Spielberg both had to speak to him

behind the scenes and say like, hey, support all the people that worked on this movie and get in line, buddy. So I, not because of that reason, but I do love Labuff. I think he's a great actor. I think he's good in this. And I like him.

And I mean, I think he's probably, yeah the best character in this he's the best thing about those transformers yeah he does have the in there they do these clips collections of him and transformers going no no no no no no no no no no no

and in Crystal Skull he has a few of those like stop stop stop stop stop stop stop I think it's he does it a lot because really anybody can do that and it sounds natural right yeah they also wrote the character to suit him very well because he's that undeniable phase of young man thing where he's just a ball of testosterone

and like gainsaying and negativity and so mutts a lot like that. Well, and then the fact that he's, yeah, emulating Brando, the Wild One, who's like the first method actor. He does seem to be kind of bringing a method stuff to... Has anyone ever cut together, a super cut of Jeff Goldblum just...

I'm saying, uh, but like, I want it. continuous from every movie he's ever And somehow you can stitch them together so it goes up and octa Jeff Goldblum is Abner

Ravenwood I mean who could it be like seriously age wise it could have been in him 2008 yeah but who has that sense so

you gotta have it be Oxley is so in all and everywhere miscast because the guy that you would imagine is like this adventurer kind of proto Indiana Jones who's down there is like just an

older what Sean Connery would have been, right? Like yeah. So who's somebody who's like 15 years older, 20 years older than Harrison, Karen out, yeah, yeah. And is Burley. Or was a strong man?

Charlton Heston? Did he have to be a strong man? No, he doesn't have to be a strong man. I'm just like... To counter that. In my mind, Oxley wouldn't be this like, And you she be. Yeah, he was a proto indie, yes. Yeah, kind of imagining. Oh, Richard Garner.

James Garner. James Garner. James Garner is good, but Eastwood. Eastwood would have been rare. That would have been good, dude. Holy shit. If you heard Karen Allen's dad is Clint Eastwood. But now imagine Eastwood playing that role.

Oh, Henry Jones, Jr. They would have to chase it because I'm not sure of it. But yeah, because you would also. see how Harrison Ford was intimidated by this guy and was Ravenwood was his mentor. That'd be awesome. That's the way to go, I think.

I can't imagine Clint Eastwood stepping onto a stage with Green screen. I know. But Bert Reynolds. Maybe it happens in Dial of Destiny. Bert Reynolds. It could still be. It could still be Clint Eastwood. That's right.

As his Grand Turismo character. Who else is? One take, Stephen. Gene Hackman. Sure. Sure. That's Eastwood. Yeah, I know it's Eastwood, but now you just got my mind reeling. What if it was Donald Sutherland?

Dame Edna. The late, great, Dame Edna. I feel bad about wishing Dame Edna died. Donald Sutherland's not bad. Australia's greatest comedic export. Dame Edna. Yeah, Donald Sutherland would be good. Keeper Southernland would have been good

as the Cape Ranchiff. I don't know why it said. Robert Redford? Talk about a keeper Sutherland. Redford would be good. Redford would be really good. Paul Newman, was he still alive? When did he die?

Oh, 8.m. Newman's still alive. I hate Robert Redford. That would have pissed me on. Do you really? Yeah. You hate him? I hate him. Why do you hate him?

I like his movies, the movies that he's in, despite him. But he will often ruin a whole movie. Why so strong about him? He's self-conscious, handsome guy. I don't like it. Oh, like a Warren Beatty. He doesn't...

But you like three joke waterfalls? How can you like three joke waterfalls? And I can trust you on anything regardless. We all saw it coming, Paul. It wasn't funny? Oh, man, I loved it. I was like three waterfalls. They knew how to beat the waterfall gang.

Do three of them. James Coburn Sure Yeah I'm just still going No you can't be Eastwood I get it I'm willing to

Coberne and Harrison Ford Would have like a finger off Like in terms of acting James Coburn has like He's got those long fucking sausage Well he had arthritis Yeah

Yeah like Oh Cranked him up Get ready to Twitter To come at you again Isn't it Isn't it fun Not going on Twitter?

Yeah I haven't been on in months I don't know what they saying about it. I use it to promote me and I don't even do that anymore. And I don't know what's happening in the world. It's cool. Using it just as a promotional tool. It's the beauty of social media.

It's like, I'm not that social. Yeah, see you media. Don't need it. I'm hanging on by a thread. Don't needy a media. Any final thoughts in Indiana Jones and the Christmas skull? Oh, Indiana Jones Christmas movie.

Oh, God. Oh, let's talk briefly about young Indiana Jones. in Indiana Jones. That's what he finds. He finds the North Poles. Indiana Jones in the North Pole. That also... Indiana Jones.

Hey, do you guys want to know the biggest plot hole ever that was pointed out to me? Just with Santa Claus being pointed out. Maybe we talked about this before about how elf at the end, how it's like, we need

Christmas cheer and for people to believe in Santa again to power the sleigh. Now, we, We've seen that Santa has elves that make toys. And we also see Santa delivers the toys. In what universe is Santa delivering toys once a year? And there is no Christmas spirit and no believing in 10th. Are these parents psychotic who rely on Santa to bring their presents?

And then when it's time to believe it's Santa, they're like, no. No Christmas cheer for Santa Slay. even though I know for a fact each year he brings gifts to my children. So in the world where Santa is every year, without fail,

bringing gifts to your home, you're refusing to believe. Why is there, why is there a question of his? You have a good point. I see your point. I think they mostly cut to the Jewish families. It doesn't really bring anything up.

Well, it's beggars belief to how many times are going to believe Indiana Jones doesn't really believe in this. mumbo-jumbo. Well, that's just, my heart left when I thought of an actual Indiana Jones fights Santa Claus. I was like, no.

The logic doesn't hold up. Oh, it sure does. Because everybody would have guests. I would be willing to do it. They would know that he exists. Or if he did exist at one point, but, you know, it was an ancient tradition. Yeah, that's good. He encounters that.

Yeah. And he's the one who's been drinking. Maybe that guy in the last crusade is Santa Claus. He finds him in some kind of cave, you know. What's that guy's name? It's true. You chose wisely? You chose poorly. Joseph of Arimathea.

Sir. Wait a sir. St. Joseph of Arimathea. St. St. Joseph of Eryth, Mathia? I'm sorry,

man, you said last thoughts. Well, no, I said, let's talk about help. Briefly about young Indiana Jones because we talked about this before we went on Mike that there's an episode of Indiana Jones of young Indiana Jones,

70s with Harrison, Ford as Indiana Jones on break from the fugitive and he's bearded and it's an episode with Jeffrey right where he plays saxophone. I actually remember really liking it. But there's Young Indiana Jones two versions, the kid and the team. Jeffrey Wright's in it too? Just that episode. Oh, cool. And then they cut this out after the TV run on was it ABC and it moved to like the family channel and then when it went to streaming. But there used to be bookends to the young Indiana Jones Chronicles where Indy was in his 90s and he had a eye patch and he would start. end the episodes and they eventually cut that stuff out.

The beginning and the end of every episode? Yeah. Oh, that's interesting. And so... So is he going to lose his eye and dialed destiny? Or does Harrison Ford shoot new wraparounds? Man. Awesome.

One of the scripts that leaked that was from a fan, everybody thought it was real because Indy loses an eye in it. And they all thought like they were doing continuity with that. But it was somebody who really came. Someone who just knows the mythology. Yeah. Appreciates it. So I bet on YouTube you could watch these wraparons.

Probably. Yeah, okay. That'd be cool to watch. Yeah, I've never dug into the Chronicles, but they're on. Me either. But now that I know that this episode exists, I'm going to watch it on. I remember really liking it. They like skew towards the education, all these things.

They're not action-packed. Well, it's not to like about being educated while you're entertained. This is an episode about jazz. Oh, man. Yeah. Yeah, I never had the, um, I never had the, even if young Indiana Jones Chronicles had been action-packed, I just could never lock into action-adventure TV series.

I always knew it wasn't his... Imagine being a character. It wasn't lethal weapon. Yeah. And they were written by, well, Darabont writ some. Terry Jones from Monty Python directed some. I think this is where David Kep got his start, I think. There's some other people in there, too.

forget. But like to be such a character, a beloved character by Harrison Ford, that he's willing to play him on television. I know. And like a half-hour kid thing. And it's in the snow, too. So it's interesting. Well, there's like a chase and then they just end up in a cabin recalling this story. It's worth of watching. He's like mid-adventure. It's not.

Yeah, I haven't seen it since it literally aired on TV. I hadn't known it existed until today. And then are there some novels? Any tie-in novels? or anything like that? Yeah, I think so. He meets the box car children and stuff. The little rascals. Bunicular.

Indiana Jones and the R-gang mysteries. I mean, I guess he would have been, but he would have been an adult by the, you know, when Spanky was around. Oh, yeah, because we were asking, does this fit Crystal Skull is after the young Indiana Jones episode? Yeah. It is, yeah.

So that's 1950, supposedly. 50, somewhere in there. 97 is Crystal Skull. And this one is 69? This movie? Yes. So he's 70 in this.

Right, because he's... He goes to Woodstock. I believe it. And then he goes and sees a re-release of Honor Majesty Secret Service. That's awesome. That's awesome. If that was the movie,

like if Harrison Ford showed up to the theater to watch Honor and Magic's Secret Service and Phoebe Waller Bridge was there and they just look up at the screen and then we all watch it. Didn't this come out a year ago?

Shut up. Let's just watch it. It's good. Yeah, that, it will be the first Indiana Jones movie that exists in a James Bond era in the real world. So I wonder if Indiana Jones

goes to a James Warner. I bet he does. He's like, hey, this kind of stuff I do. Year Waller Bridge suddenly has a cockney. accent and she goes, well, you James Bond. I wouldn't be surprised if she references that at some point in this movie.

As long as they don't do a thing where indie walks by a shop and somebody's on the piano and like, you know, bam, baby, boom, bum, bab. Oh, God. No, no, it's Hendrix. Hendrix comes up with it. Oh, my God.

He's doing Star Spagel banner. Yeah, that he slips the ninajones. Or you know how in Crystal Skull when they walk through the they're in the warehouse and the arc crate is busted open and it just gives you a little of that music. He's going to be in a bar and there'll be a bottle of Crystal Skull vodka

that camera pants to and then they'll give you the theme from this movie which I couldn't even tell you what it is. We haven't even talked about. This is the weakest John Williams score of probably any movie and I love this man. Don't get me wrong but I couldn't tell you any theme from this movie. It's just very

unmemorable. He did better scores for Bridge of Spies and the color purple. Yeah. He didn't even do those. We know how, dog. That's the thing that sticks. I think it'll be better. I think everybody's more into this new one than skull, I think.

I think they're phoning in and in a lot on this movie. It feels phoned in. The feeling of like, oh, they didn't want to leave the country and go outside of studios there. And the, yeah, the wooden thing with the, like, I just, I wish he wasn't as growly. If you just had a little lightness, because what it ends up sounding is like your dad's impression of John Wayne. I know. Because it'll be like, okay, then we're going to have to go to that temple after all.

Well, then if Eastwood was in it, it'd be really grunting. It'd be like grunting back and forth. I know, grunt off. I'm Ravenwood, you piece of shit. Well, listeners. That's the last light of the Nile of Destiny. I'm Ravenwood, you piece of shit. And that's the opening line, too.

That's the whole movie. Oh, it's like the wall. No, it's just that quick. No, you know the wall ends with... Oh, yeah. It ends where the beginning goes in. The last time we recorded right after we bought tickets. Yeah.

I want to say I have three tickets to three... Different screenings? Screenings of this movie already. That's awesome. God, I hope I like this thing. How many days in a row? Are you doing three days in a row? Well, you and us three, we're going on the 30th.

Yeah. But that wasn't, I wanted to see as soon as I could. So I'm going on the 29th. So we'll get to read your face on the 30th when we're sitting down for the movie. Yeah. What are goarly's eyes telling us? I'm going to come in like rigidly like, are you excited about watching this again? That's what we'll say to them.

And then a friend I know is renting out the El Capitan to watch it at 9 o'clock in the morning on like July 6th or something. Right on. That sounds fun. Yeah. That's cool. Yeah. Is that a typical thing that people can run out the El Capitan? I've never heard of it before.

Sometimes I see like posters at like the, you know, but at the ball or something like running out of the theater. Yeah. It seems so costly. But then when I say advertisements for it, I'm like, well, I guess. This person is in no need of money. Is it a Daddy Warbucks? It's Elon Musk. It's Elon Musk.

Your friend, Elon. It's Harrison Ford. Oh, I mean. Makes sense. Yeah. That's where David Letterman bought his first car. Harrison Ford. That's what he always would say.

That's what he would say. You know, I bought my first car, Harrison Ford. Okay, so predictions. Of dial of destiny? Whether you'll like it, whether you won't, whether what we will or won't see. Man. I. For instance, does he ride off in the sunset?

Does he die? I think I'll like it. And I'm hoping I like it more than Crystal Skull. We'll see. I bet he dies. I don't think he's going to die. To say, I think I'll like it, meaning I don't think I'll hate it. Yeah.

Like, I don't hate Crystal Skull. I wonder how much of the Logan bag of tricks mangled will be using on this. I think the franchise hero dying with Logan and Bond is done for now. And Tony Stark. Spoilers, everybody. And Han Solo. Spoilers again. Yeah, even just because of Han Solo, they probably won't do it, right?

Yeah. Like, hey, we did that with the other Lucas Films thing. Yeah. Do you think there'll be... Less than you cut to, like, Daisy Ridley, and she imagines both Han Solo and Indiana Jones. Or Indiana Jones. Are you a force echo?

No, no, I'm in your mind. Do you think there'll be any handoff to Phoebe Waller Bridge's character? No, but mutt, yes. mutt's finally going to be able to put that hat on he's he'll do like a pound puppies kind of hat I hope that there's a post-credit sequence where the hat finally blows to mutt's feet and shai Leboff fixed it is Shilaboff on Venice Beach

being good just just just wasted that that way you can't tell if someone's dirty or tan and he's just oh my God sitting there with like two women in bikinis smoking a spliff in 1969 Oh, I got to hear more of this. This is, or he's like, they're camping in Malibu.

Yeah. In a trailer. Yeah, if mutt showed up just like as like a almost like Batman 66 kind of thing. We're like, in the end of Jones runs by like a trailer and the door opens. Oh, yeah. It's like, what the fuck was it? Yeah. You're a teacher?

Part time. That's so weird. Do you know there's also two versions of that? because the trailer had a different reading. Yeah. It was part time. Part time. Oh, man.

Should we give this some sort of rating on a scale of 0-00-0-0-0-0-0-7? Of course. I'm trying to remember I know Raiders was seven and crusade for me was six and Temple of Doom was probably a six for me, I would think. Yeah. This is a three for me. Easy three because three and a half would be. dead middle. And this is a little below dead middle.

Where's that fall in sort of James Bond territory for you? It falls into like a, like a... Oh yeah, what's your corresponding? Three and a half or three. Tomorrow never dies. For your eyes only? Yeah. Tomorrow never dies, you blasphemous motherfucker.

10 out of 10, even though we only go to seven. I'm giving it a four because it's still an indie movie. Sure. Okay, okay, I appreciate that. I still watch it. Yeah, I was four and a half. Whoa! Now I feel bad.

The three waterfalls really got them. I'll see your four and a half. I'm giving it a four and a half too. Whoa. Yeah, I can't make me to hate it. I called it lousy. That's too strong of a word. It's just not as good as the other one.

It's flawed. It's not finished. It's underbaked. Yeah. And a little overbaked. I think we should rebake it. You know what? It's true. The harsh just thing is just it's not as good as the other ones, but that's just because the other ones are so darn good. Yeah.

Art time. Part time. Well, we'll be back not long from now with our final episode of Indiana Jones. I imagine we'll all rate seven, not a seven right? Yeah, because we have plans to record the episode the day after we see it. Yes, which it'll be. As we have known from recording things like Spector and no time to die. immediately after seeing it, this will in no way skew our love of the movie.

We're not going to come out of raving. I'm going to. And I don't care if I'm wrong. I just don't care. We can revisit later. So we're seeing it on a Friday. So Saturday, what is the date on that? We're recording on Saturday the 1st of July.

First of it'll come out that day, this episode. Yeah. So, you know, it'll give you kids a chance to see it on your Fridays and then. Your Thursday, Friday or Saturday. Yeah, yeah. Listen to us on Saturday. That's fun. Indiana Jonesing theoretically will return once we all watch.

that young Indiana Jones episode and then ride the ride of Disney. I have been having quite a bit of anticipation leading up to this in a way that I haven't for a franchise movie from my childhood in a long time where I feel like all year I've been thinking about this movie. It feels really sentimental to me. Do you think that it was, do you think the Force Awakens you weren't feeling that because you had been wronged by three previous movies? No, I had it a bit for Force Awakens.

But, and I liked that movie. I saw Force Awakens at a screening that Conan was at. Oh, you did. Yeah. Seemed to enjoy it about as much as I did. Once I saw Last Jedi, which didn't really land for me. I think that kind of all that stuff went away for a while. But now it's back in.

And I was this way with no time to die too where I just knew going in. I don't even care if this is bad. These movies exist out of time and criticism for me. I'm just happy to have them. Happy to have them. If the next one has a wit and genuine like, because, you know, most of the times, time when we were talking about Raiders, Temple of Doom.

It does. Raiders, Temple of Doom, and Last Crusade, most of the time we'd be talking about how funny they were. Yeah, right. I know, Last Crusade. Screwball coming. So I got a good feeling dial of destiny. Is that why you came in hard on the three waterfall joke? You're trying to bring... Literally the rule of three.

Go on, guys. You do what it's doing. And they're like Karen Allen's comatose holding onto the steering wheel. The way you're sinking your teeth into those wobble-wos. Indiana Jones and the Wobble Yous Call it a rope Bye everybody Mad and Mad and

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