James Bonding - On Her Majesty's Secret Service with Paul Scheer

Episode Date: December 21, 2022

Paul Scheer joins the Matts to talk about ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE! Also, he went to a James Bond premiere. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Now entering nerdist.com. That's great. Come on. I think that's the best opening bond thing. It really is. It has no lyrics, obviously. Yeah, but come on. It is, I feel like the theme that is often adapted,

you hear, I mean, I really like, I feel like this is used more than you think it is. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's used quite a bit. Yeah. But I also, it's such a different, already it's a different thing because of the fact

there are no words. And that was an odd choice to break that hard. They made a lot of strong choices in this movie. They were like, forget these other, what we've done.

And I think that was the biggest problem with it in a way. Well, there's a few. But also, like, I felt like this movie ceased to be its own a few times.

Like, the theme song is showing clips of other movies. And I don't think that they've ever done that before. No, I do. That's a mistake it makes. Yeah. You think so?

I do, because I think it does make so many strides to do its own thing, and then occasionally we'll slip back into, like, being a little insecure that it's not a Connery movie or something. Exactly. Like, I feel like it's like, it's the same. It's the same. Don't worry. It's the same. But it isn't at all.

Look at these memories he has in his desk. But listen to this. This is fuzzy synthesizer with alpine horns. never heard that before. It's really a delight. I really do like this theme, although I don't know if I like it as the opening theme. That's a weird, kind of like, you want, you want that song. You need that song, although I would listen to this. All day. All day. All day. It's basically there. On her majesty secret service, it fits. It's really clean. Well, welcome to James Bonding, everybody. This is

I believe 0012 is the number on this one. I could be wrong. Could be 11. I don't know. Our guest today is you know him from all kinds of television The League on FXX, NTSFSU, over on the Adult Swim, and of course

his very own podcast, one of my favorite podcast. How did this get made? Paul Shears joining us. Thank you so much for having me. I'm very excited to be on this podcast. We're happy to have you. You were the first guest that we basically locked down on a movie, because when we announced it on Twitter. You claimed this one. Oh, I wanted it. It was a smart move.

I was very excited. I mean, I'm a big James Bond fan. When I was a kid, my dad, we would go to, like, Star Trek conventions. Nice. Which was awesome in every way. But they would always have, like a little, there would always be like a James Bond subsect

of the Star Trek convention. I know exactly what you're talking about. That's exactly right. So, you know, I had, I had like a James, like, you know how I guess you could go to Disneyland and they have like a Indiana Jones kit where it's like a foam hat and something that looks like a whip and a gun I had something like that for James Bond that I had gotten out of one of those Star Trek conventions like I want to say it was made by Corgi or something like that.

And it was great. It was a little Walter P.P.K. And a little badge even though he doesn't really have a badge. It's more like a wallet, like a wallety kind of badge. And it was great. And I also had like a little Aston Martin that you could hit a button and the top would fly off. I was very excited about that. And I never understood as a kid why they didn't have action figures for James Bond movies. They wanted those action figures so badly. And they still don't. No, they had those, they did, Corgi did make little, like, tin

soldiers that didn't move. Yes, but they were to scale with their cars. That's true. Yeah, they were not it's the most British a toy could be. Yeah, it really was like pre-war. Those just with us here? Now it doesn't move? What are you talking about? For whatever reason, I think by first James Bond and like why I believe it like sticks out to me the most is I remember view to a kill most vividly.

So do I. And and that was the one that was like, whoa. Me too. And then I went back and found Sean Connery and all that stuff later. But that like view to a kill was kind of mind-blowing. And now that I'm thinking about like, oh, who's doing Vue to a kill? Well, we do have a, let's just say this. So we're talking about doing a live episode of Vue to a Kill because so many people want to do that.

Oh, wow. And we're kind of thinking we had room for one more. Hey, I want to join us for this. Please, I would love it because as I'm talking about it, I'm getting all excited about it. I'm finding that there is, there used to be this hate for that movie, but now there's a real love. And I don't know if it's nostalgic. Well, I think what we're running into is the people in our, in our generation or age group, that was the sort of middle of the 80s James Bond movie that everybody saw. Like, you came of age enough to be able to go to the movie theater by yourself with some friends for that summer and see it a bunch of times.

And then they ran it on cable like crazy. And there was a real like, I think, you know, the. sexuality of it with Grace Jones and Christopher Walken is so crazy and it was like about computers like there I remember so many scenes from that movie and you're right I think it's just like it just played so much

I haven't seen in years but there's so many vivid moments of that that movie just throwing the guy out of the the blimp. It's basically Goldfinger it's one of my favorite Bond movies for some reason it's really good but I I feel like I have one cool piece of James Bond I don't know if it's trivia or

Not trivia. It's just, for me, it was cool. I was at the Radio City Music Hall premiere of, of good, not, oh, wait, of course, I'm not messing it. Not, Golden I. Was it Golden Eye? The first Brosnan? Or was it maybe the second Brosnan.

What's the second Brosnan? Tomorrow never does. No, then it was definitely Golden. And it was amazing because it was, you know, the first Brosnan movie. It was going to be amazing. I went to a James Bond convention the night before in Manhattan. I met Q, which was amazing.

I have a picture with Q. Desmond Llewellyn, right? That's his name. And then you were in Radio City Music Hall, and, you know, Pierce Broson introduced the movie and, you know, the circle, the bullet circle kind of goes around the screen. And it was exciting. It was very, very exciting. I was in the very top of balcony.

That's awesome. And it was really, really fun to see that. We've never had someone who's been to premiere. And it wasn't, I don't even think it was like an official, like, bond premier. as much as it was like a fan premiere but I don't know like I wasn't even that even concerned about who like now I'm thinking he probably was a premiere like my mind I was like this is just for fans we're all fans remember being dressed up you were wearing your corgi yeah I was very excited a little old for the badge leave it home but it was cool to happen just in case people asked did you so when would you had do you have a favorite James Bond it's interesting because now I'm really you know obviously I'm really I'm really I'm really I'm really liking the new ones. I really enjoyed Skyfall a lot. And I don't know if that's just because it's

timely. Like right now, it's like it's fresh in my mind. But like Skyfall I think really kind of pulls everything together in an interesting way. It's like, oh, it gives you a realism but it's gritty and there's stuff in there that I really like. But if I'm going to be as honest

as I think it would have to be like the gold finger, I think is probably the one that I've seen the most. Yeah. That I think I like that and from Russia with love. Or those are like the two that I feel like I love from Rushwood Love so so good and and they're just classic great movie I don't know I love them I like the first three Sean Conneries even doctor no is great you know it's like they're and and I think I've gotten a real distaste for Roger Moore even though I like from a view to a kill so much it just I was like once I found

Sean Connery I was like oh no no no I don't I don't like this anymore and I really like you know Pierce Brasden was in those This never worked 100%. Yeah, he's my least favorite. Yeah, oh, really? He gets no love. He gets no love on this podcast. And he was the one that people wanted the most.

Because it was like Remington Steel. Oh, if he didn't do that, he could have been this. And I think ultimately, though, it's not his fault because I think it was the time those movies were being made. Yeah. Like the Christmas Jones and all that Denise Richards bullshit. It was like terrible. Yeah, and also what they were.

felt like they had to compete with, you know, like true lies had come out. Oh, yeah. The ice hotel and jiving around the ice hotel. Like, there's a lot. And I've seen all them in the theaters. I never, you know, I never missed one. But, you know, and then, and who's the guy in between? I'm forgetting his name, not, uh, Timothy Dalton.

And Dalton's movies suffered from boring. It's like, they were like, the first one was like living daylights. I'm like, oh my gosh, like, you know, I mean, my memory of that is, this is boring. Must have bored the living day. Light's out of it. But I really do love License to Kill with Robert Davy because that one seems so kind of violent

and a little bit darker. That one's the most 80s actioning. Definitely because it's got a Michael Kamen score which associates you with his dihound and lethal weapon. In my brain, even as a kid, though, I just associated those. I associated License to Kill and Cobra.

Those were like two movies in my head that I felt tonally were like the same thing. Yeah. And the other James Bond movie that's worthy of mentioning for me is Live and Let Die, which is, I still think that's like, I think that's my favorite Roger Moore. That's one of my favorite bonds as well. It's really cool. And it's, again, like, the coolest Bond movies, I feel like are the ones that are a little bit more dark, a little bit more foreboding and weird. That one's definitely weird.

That's a weird one. It's a weird one. It's a big. Yeah, it's crazy. And then, like, you know, Yaffa Koto gets killed by literally blowing up. He gets full, like almost with helium and explodes. It's, yeah, I mean, I'm, I'm, you know, I'm definitely a James Bond fan and I look forward to it. But I really like these, most of these Daniel Craig ones.

Well, this, so here we are in 1969, guys. It's been three years since we've seen a James Bond movie. Sean Connery has said, fuck you, Covey Broccoli. I'm sorry, I don't mean to show these guys a picture. Oh, my God. I'll tweet this when this comes out, but there's a behind the scenes picture. That is amazing. That's exactly how it is in my head.

Of the Yafat Koto Balloon. Oh, my God. Character that my friend gave me. I wish that they had, like, you could buy that. Just somehow. Just buy it. Okay, so this is the sixth movie in the James Bond franchise. This is a, for a long time was widely regarded as not great.

Yeah. And then, I think, rediscovered by a lot of people, by people who just had, there was enough time between Sean Connery not being in it. and George Lazenby that you could look at it and go, wow, that was actually pretty enjoyable. So it's 1969, three years without a James Bond movie. So there's no reason for that other than they just didn't know what to do with themselves? I think the people, because, again, the reason why I picked this movie was because I always felt like I was a supporter of this movie.

Like, you got to see that. And people like, that was one with the bad James Bond. Like, you know, like, because he did one, it was viewed as like, that was the bad one. And I've always liked it. watching it again last night and this morning I am like I have some opinions on it

that are a little bit different but I think overall I think my opinion about it is it's a good movie kind of in the vein of what they're doing now because it's more realism based for the most part

but I think that he's not good I agree it's ahead of its time but he's a misstep it's a shame and I realize today why that might have been because I did a little research

he was a male model and there's something like that makes sense like he does a lot of posing and he kind of looks the part and but he's not like there's no chops there and and Roger Moore for his campiness

and Sean Connery for his good Connie got out of here sure Connie for his grittiness like everybody had a thing and he's just like if you put an ad like a burberry ad of like James Bond oh yeah that works he looks the part yeah he just

doesn't act the part there's no thing that's pull you in yeah he's not I mean if you look through you look down the line of all the James Bond's they're all fair I mean let's Brosnan you know has his moments of not being a great actor but I think

throughout the James Bond movies you're stuck with these leading men who actually can act they can be in other things they can do what they need to do and Brasden brought his own Like he was Brosnan He was always

Like he was always Delivering That type of James Bond Well the problem we're The problem we're finding As we're going through these movies And Matt you'll agree with me Because I said we

And I'm not meaning the Royal We I'm meeting us together Is that Brosden Brosden Toes the line He never figures out Which James Bond he wants to be Yes

And he's yeah He's always Either going to be like I'm going to be Sean Conner I'm going to beat the shit out of this woman Or I'm going to be Roger Moore And get some double takes from

some pigeons. But either way, I'm going to act. The pores of my skin are going to be acting. My jaws, my lips. It's so crazy because he really felt like he wanted this. And he would have continued. Oh, yeah. It's clear in the documentary that he was hurt and sad that it was over.

The other ones were kind of like, oh, all right, it's time. Yeah. Roger Moore may be having fun. Roger Moore is enjoying himself. Roger Moore is so old. That's the thing that I didn't realize. When you watch James Bond now and I watch it as a kid, didn't realize how old he is.

He's 45 in Live and Let Die his first movie. Wow. He's... He's... Like the same age as Connery, right? He's a year older. He's a year older than Sean Connery. Yeah, he is...

And did it until 1980 fucking five. I know that you've probably been asked this question on the podcast, but I'm going to ask it again. You are going to do the non... Never said never. Yeah, never seen. Never. Yes, we are.

Which, again, is another movie that I kind of like, but that's also where Sean Connery showed is it. I mean, I don't know if I liked it. Like, as a kid, I was like, more Sean Connery. Yes. Because then they go back to Thunderball. Like Thunderballs after this, right? No.

Thunderball. Diamond's forever. Diamond's forever. That's the one they bring them out. The Thunderball is what Never Say Never is a remake of. That's right. Yeah. So it's the same exact plot.

So first of all, let's talk about the supporting players in this movie. You got amazing. Amazing. Diana Rig is fucking awesome. I would say she's in my top, I would even say top five James Bond girls. That's not even higher. And I wish she was in a better. received film because she's so good and often forgotten.

She's beautiful and she's great. She's acting and she's doing, she's so good. And the other thing too is Telly Savalas. Telly Zavales, ladies and gentlemen. Smokes a cigarette like this. That was what I couldn't stop staring at. Draco also smokes a cigarette with a, you know,

I love that idea that there's a holder for your cigarette because it's too pedestrian to smoke directly. Here's the thing with that. That was put on, because of, because the, they didn't smoke filtered cigarettes in those days. It would get way too hot to hold. Much like the Ghostbusters. Yeah, of course.

That's hilarious. Just like Bobby Brown warned us. So yeah, so let's, I'm going to jump in here with our notes. This opens up, this opens up at Universal Export. So we see the outside of, of James Bond's office. Can I even give you one thought before that? Please, go ahead. Because the gun barrel is first.

Yeah. I would like to talk about the gun barrel because I think every Bond had. as a pose. And I think they're always interesting to... And Lazenby's pose is questionable. It's a kneel. He kneels. He almost like does a leg squat.

It's another moment where you feel like they're going too far to separate themselves. Yeah, that one I was like, it just doesn't seem action-y to me. And there's moments of him doing some good action, but that... Plus he's wearing a hat still, like the Connery. And I don't know. It's time to... lose the hat because he's never wearing in the movie. I think the Connery one was, but

he always had a hat on. He always had well he always had a hat in his hand that he threw on Money Penneys. Right. I don't, and yet he never wore a hat. And Connery wasn't even the guy in the gun barrel for the first three movies. It was the stuntman and they just never changed it for a few. So crazy.

But also what they do this time which is different, they also add a little effect to the gun barrel some sheen to it that moves as the barrel moves. Which you know, hey look at this. guys. They took three years of technology to find that.

It's much better than when they decided in, was it diner the day to make the bullet come at you? Oh, yeah. Ron's bullet goes into the barrel of the other person's gun. And then still it bleeds for no reason. You'd be fine. No, but if you do this shot, you do bleed inside your gun. Oh, is that what happens?

I will also say one of the most, oh, well, we'll get to the theme song in a second. Yeah. So we open to Universal Exports. I enjoyed seeing the outside of Universal Exports. And you know who's in the reflection? of that plaque? Yeah. The director, Peter Hunt,

he throws himself a Hitchcock. Ooh. He's walking by. Drop bits of knowledge on us. Peter Hunt, second unit director for the most of the... All of them, yeah. And editor,

and he's the one responsible for doing this, like, frenetic style. And I think even before this movie, that hadn't been done much because there was this editing rule that, you know, you don't cut on movement.

And now it's basically, you do cut on movement. Yeah. He really, I think he's kind of an unsung filmmaker. I don't know what else he did. He did, let's see,

Honor Magic. Secret Service, the film Gold in 1974, shout at the devil, 76, death hunt, 81, wild geese two. Have you ever seen Wild Geese? No. There's how did this get me? Oh, really? Oh my gosh. Amazing. It's Richard Burton who just doesn't care. Roger Moore, Richard Harris. There's a stereotypical gay soldier that goes

to his death by going, with his gun going, come on, you big black beauties, as these Afro- American soldiers come attack him. I need to watch that. But, I mean, the poster for Wild Geese, too. Who is in Wild Geese, too? Scott Glenn, right? I've seen this.

And Barbara Carrera from Never Say Never, right? Wow. I feel like this is a movie. Lawrence Olivier? Oh, God, for a moment, right? It must be, like, a scene. Yeah, yeah. I feel like this is a movie that hurt everybody involved in it.

Like, unfortunately. Like, I don't think that, like, if this, it just, yeah, like, Peter Hunt isn't to blame for this movie. But he never got to direct the next one. I think he did an amazing job, honestly. I think it's a really well-put-together film. I was watching 4-2s. I was like, let me just watch it as a direct...

Watching it. It's just like the other ones. I mean, which makes sense because he was doing all the other ones. You know, it just... I think visually, too. I think this movie pops in a way that none of them did between, you know, 62 and, you know, up through. I think it was shot...

I want to say it was shot in like 70mm. because I went to a Bond Film Festival at USC and they were showing them all and then suddenly this one comes on and it was super wide cinema scope. It was amazing. I wonder if they say anything about that. I'm looking,

I don't see anything really about that. But anyway, so, uh, we open on, the, the, Q's real, the only Q scene in this movie besides at the wedding at the very end is him boring M to death. That's right.

Yeah. It's a scene with him just talking at M. Pulling stuff up. of his pocket saying that we're going miniaturization is the thing god had i already tuned out this is the first and that's no i felt too like i feel like structurally this movie is hurt is hurting because like the first 40 minutes are like what what where am i how what's has all fallen to everything it's this is the

closest film to any of the books and the only difference is how they structure the first part of the story because in the book the scene where he chases her down at the beach comes later. I think he's already been tasked by her father. Which makes more sense. It makes a lot more sense. And then there's guys following him and her. Well, because it makes sense. Like that opening scene is, with Laysenby is. Also, I don't know if she's, I feel like he should have waited a little longer because it looked like she might have been going swimming. Well, and then also he like drives his car rough, like gets it down to the beach. It's like she's just a girl walking into like the- You've got some time. Yeah, she's not jumping off a building. Plenty of time, actually. By the way, I do like to bring up the fact that. that when he does drive on that beach, you hear screeching tires,

which is something that you're not going to be able to do on a sandy beach. Doesn't the sound in this movie? Because even the guns are so stark, everything is so clearly after that. Yeah. Well, there's a lot of ADR in it. Yeah. And so much so,

and I wanted to bring this up to you, and I don't know if I'm jumping ahead. No, go ahead. The scene where he goes, this doesn't happen to the other guy, you know, that line. That's where we are. Yeah, sure.

It looks like it is ADR and there was another line there. I wonder. And I watched it. back twice and I was like I think he's saying something else so I you know let's let's let's go to the tape guys the thing about DVD technology is that it's terrible and I probably should have just bought it on iTunes and I could have skim through this a lot better I uh I also watched my DVD copy of it and did not buy the $9 iTunes download the thing about this too so the it starts with no one knowing where James Bond is right essentially uh money penny MQ although I feel like

you could have helped somehow yeah with instead of Well, he was saying now we can keep track of James Bond, wherever he is. But it doesn't come into hand. They don't have it. They're not following him. Too little too late. This scene is undercrank Central, too. Everything is spread up and it's a little too much.

I will say this about George Lazenby. Yeah. I think he's very good at fighting. Yeah, that's why he was hired. Have you heard that story that he hit the stuntman on accident? And they finally went, all right, this is our guy. Because he just can throw a punch so well. So he's just, for those at home.

He's just thrown a man into a mosquito net. That's maybe my favorite after. There's the car screeching on sand. Yep, and she, I love this. This is very respectful of Tracy to just, instead of taking the car, just drives to her car. Yeah, it's just then goes. It's just not a thief after all.

And here he is. Again, you're hearing screeching tires, and this is just on sand. Just on sand. This never happened to the other fella. Maybe I'm wrong. I'm now watching, but it, I don't know.

But it's also really just what... Lame. What are you saying? What are you saying to us as an audience, like... The Bond movies do suffer occasionally from these self-referential things. And obviously in the Roger Moore era, it is what it is. But there's that time when he's killing Blofeld and For Your Eyes Only, and Blowfeld goes, I'll buy you a stainless steel delicatessen.

And it's this inside joke to... It's some dig at Kevin McClory. And, like, come on. That's so... That's so weird. But here's the other thing. When I was watching, I was like, no, no, it did happen to the other one. Like, what just happened here is not unlike the other James Bond.

That was the thing that I had the hardest time trying to, like, wrap my head around. I was like, well, what are you saying? Yeah, he's been shot in Hong Kong. Yeah, like, you're basically saying no guys have ever jumped you. Like, that... The line should have come after Tracy gets killed. Yeah. Yes.

Yes. He should have looked right into the camera, just down the barrel of that lens. I love that. And also I bet this never happened to the other fellow. He's in Portugal for some unknown reason. He's not chasing down a lead or anything. He's maybe just on vacation. And that's why I would argue, and I don't know if you guys know this,

but maybe the movie was re-edited. They needed to start with a little bit more of an action scene. Even if it wasn't, like, after the fact, they may have even started that way thinking, let's kick this off of the bank, because I don't recall the book kicking off like that. Yeah, it's like, why would you want, like, you were like, has he been following her?

why is he fine? Like what's going on? Like the movie, it takes you a little bit of time because everything you know about James Bond is kind of thrown out the window. Like the mission, the gadgets,

and you know, and I get the idea that they want to be like, this is not the same James Bond, but I think that's why it polarizes most people because it's the biggest break from any James Bond movie. Yeah, but it's got a lot of the,

it's got a lot of the quintessential things. Like, let's go to a casino, let's play Baccarat. Yes. Then, so he's, Essentially, at this point, he's just, he wants, he wants to fuck her. That's his motivation for the first half of this movie. Which is kind of cool to see James Bond on vacation. Like, I've always, I had written many a sketch idea when I first started writing a sketch of like the minutes after like the, like, you know, like, with Roger Moore and like when tattoo from, from Fantasy Islands up and the thing is like, well, what, what's the next day like? What is? Were he still up there?

Yeah, like, he's up there. They're on the. boat together this girl that he barely knows great you fucked her in a raft in the middle of the ocean now what I can hear you fucking dot there I know you

keep in prisoner but I hear you I'm fascinated with the bond life when he is not doing any like when he is not on assignment

and so there is something interesting about this you know but this one neither seems like he's living it up or not like he just kind of

seems like he's going through the motions without he's aimlessly doing everything that James Bond but to no end. I love that your email comes up while you're watching

Bond for Brooks Brothers. Look at this production design of this purple wallpaper. It reminds me in the Madonna Inn. Have you guys been to the Madonna Inn? I've heard of it, yeah. It's crazy. So this is... I won't stay at a room because it kind of matched this room.

Oh, really? Because... I mean, I just chose like, well, you could choose any room. Let's take the Bond one. Now, here's what we're seeing. We're seeing now George Lazy's in Vaz-Jerm. Bond pop in with a sign of the times the ruffled shirt yeah he's got the ruffled tuxedo shirt and uh of course he's there to play baccarat and uh i don't know what tracy's motivation is for just waltzing in there and and putting down 20 000 she doesn't have you see this to me seems like the opening scene yeah like the way that he kind of walks in yeah and he and they're meeting and

they're but i mean but again she does thank him for saving her life and that's why she invites She repays their debts. You don't think that she's just reckless because she's at her wits' end and she doesn't care anymore? I guess. The thing that blew my mind about this scene as well is

in my mind, James Bond does not get paid well. I've read a bunch of the Ian Fleming books. He's not a rich man. And he's not on assignment. He's not working, yet he is spending a lot of money in this game. Like, this is not... I've always pictured...

And here's what I've always thought. And I don't know if you guys agree or disagree with this. I've always pictured him just skimming a little bit. Oh, really? Here and there from his missions. Oh, I like that.

So, like... I feel like he doesn't get paid a lot, but everything he does get paid, he just socks away because he's always on a mission. He doesn't have to have an apartment or anything with that. But there's also the fact that he did come from a very wealthy family, the bonds.

One of my favorite things about the whole Bond thing, and it's in this movie as well, is when you see something that you've never seen with James Bond, like his apartment is in one of the movies. Yeah, yeah. But in this one, you get to see his awful. office. Like James Bond

has any office. Like the picture of the queen, right? Is that when he salutes her and drinks? Yes. Says mom. He says,

sorry, mom, mom, yeah. I love that. Like, I love weird stuff like that. That's what I love about living,

let die, because it opens with, basically, with them, M and Money Pudding coming to his apartment. Yeah. And then they linger on

the espresso maker, like it's some kind of cue gadget. Like, what is this? Yeah, they have no idea what that is. And at that time, I can't imagine

how much that machine costs because they cost like nine grand now, You know? Like, I can't imagine what that would have been back then. Also, the thing that is interesting, too. So at this point, he's met Tracy. He's saved her.

She's runaway. He has then somehow tracked her down to a particular hotel that has a casino. He's decided to get a room that has a bed outside. Yeah, of course. Well, yeah. And he's going to fuck her outside. So right now, like, James Bond must treat, like, James Bond treats his personal life like he's on a mission from M.

He's like, I am. He's doing everything without a mission. Like his mission is to fuck a girl. That's it. There's nothing else here. But first he has to stalk her. Yes. And fight some guys.

Because we're, I mean, are we agreeing to the fact that this, like, you could argue that the entire time he knew, this is Draco's daughter. And he knew Draco would have ties to Blowfeld. And I mean, that's the long, con if you could

you could say that that is the subtle thing going underneath it. I'm trying to remember the book if that's... Well, okay, so he encounters her, he encounters some thugs. At this point in the movie, we don't know who these thugs are. We don't know what's going on. It looks like just one of the guys from

the Junkyard gang, grown up, that's... Yes, I love that guy. He's just... This is this scene, and I wanted to play this just because... I'm getting up to one of my favorite parts of this, too. Is this the reference to the other movie? Yeah. You guys talking about?

Yeah. So now, James is being led in by the thugs. He doesn't know where he's being taken at this point. By the way, this walk is a very modely walk. I feel like he does have a swing. And there's a small man who's whistling Goldfinger. Now, here are, I want to talk about this because now having a janitor, sorry, not whisper, whistle.

Whistle. Yep. Goldfinger is, I think, cute and acceptable for a James. Bond movie. I feel like that's a subtle tip of the hat to James Bond, and I think that works. What I have an issue with is, why is it a midget? And that is, like, so you can't put a hat on a hat. Like, like, there is something very odd to me. It's like, we're really, like, were you not, were you thinking, oh, if we just have a regular size janitor, the joke won't get across.

Like, we need a little person, and they'll do it. Like, there's something. very weird about the midget janitor that is i thought well he'll come back like now watching it again i was like he'll come back no to me it it falls right in line with either the like misogyny of the era or like if you were a little person you had to take a menial job or if you were of ethnic persuasion you had to take a menial job and it oh just there's something off about it that isn't doesn't sit well i do there's now the scene here so he's being led james is being led into an office he doesn't know where he is until he fights his way in and he finds out it's Draco. Draco essentially is a...

Very close to Drog, the other Draco. Victor Drago, yes. He is a, Draco is essentially a mini Blofeld. Yeah. He's the business blowfeld. He's the business blowfell. He's not there for world domination. He just wants money.

But he's also, he's a character type that appears over and over again in these movies with Columbo from Four Your Eyes only and Carambay. Yeah. Yeah. He's a guy with some ties that aren't great, but is also there to help James through the story. Yeah. But here's the interesting part about this. He asks James to fuck his daughter, repeated.

Yes, for a million dollars. Yes. To finish her education. I will say one of the cool, oh, sorry. Yeah, go ahead. One of the cool moments in this is when he does see him for the first time, he gets down back on that knee. Yeah. And has the knife at the ready.

There is something cool. I thought that was like a badass. Zoom in on it. too. Yeah. It was a great, I thought it was a great, uh, great entrance. Yeah, great reveal. But there is one really prickish thing.

Doesn't he offer him a cigarette? And he goes, no, I prefer my own. Yes. Just take the cigarette bond. You never will. Or he could be laced with poison. On the day you marry her, I'll give you a personal dowry of one million pounds in gold. That's quite an inducement.

But I don't need a million pounds. Stop, he though. He's acting. I'll have a bachelor's taste for freedom. Please. Bachelor's taste for freedom. Who knows what will come of it? I'm sorry, Draco, but in my profession I can't.

What? You have connections not open to me. Where is Ernstevero Blofeld? Blofeld. Some of my men have recently defected to him. I don't know where he is. Can you find out? If I could, I wouldn't tell her majesty secret service.

But I might tell my future son, you know. Go on. Next week is my birthday. We're just going to watch the movie. It's just, it's such, it's, it's, it's so weirdly watchable. You understand? Well, let's say I'll sleep on the idea. He's dressed like a, like a 70s anime character in that scene.

Yeah. Like Google 13 or Lupin or whatever. So now James has, uh, has more motivation to, to fuck Tracy. motivation is a hundred is a million dollars or a million pounds well he doesn't want that he wants connections he wants

he wants that's his motivation because even when he's off he's on and am I wrong and imagining that there is a there is a there is a Blochfeld plot that's kind of

I guess it's not building I mean Blufeld's always there doing something and I know he's always after him but I feel like was there a recent like is he coming off of anything that Blotfeld had done to him

like in the timeline of the James Bond you know. Yeah, well, it was you only live twice. Yeah. But in the books, there must have been Thunderball than this. No, no. What's the first, what's the other Blofeld book? It's, uh, because you only live twice as the last one. That's where he kills Blowfell. Well, never say never now. That, dude, that whole thing that just happened in the, in the press. Yeah, where they finally got the rights back. Yeah, absolutely. What is the other book that has Blowfield? Why can't I think of it? Um,

What movies have him? He's in diamonds or forever. He's in... I guess it would have to be Thunderball, then. Yeah. So it goes Thunderball, this. Then you only live twice. Yeah, so what happens to the other?

Thunderball... He's really dealing with Largo, though. Yeah. Oh, we did skip over... I don't mean to go back, but we skipped over a slap. He slaps... Yes. He slapses the girl right away.

He puts her arm. Yeah. He is not... Women get hit a few times in this movie. I think throughout the 60s women were getting hit a lot in James Bond movies Yeah It's funny because I haven't watched

Sean Connery one in a while And seeing that as a go Right yeah I remember you know It's harder to watching Man with a Golden Gun when Roger Moore Slaps uh Mod Adams and that's Like in the 70s even and it just doesn't feel right It's not right anymore But he's the bad person in that

Right? She's not a bad person She's she's misunderstood She's a well He'll he slap her in that too? He does? No. Doesn't he?

Doesn't he? Doesn't Roger Morsay as soon as he did that scene? He was like, I'm never doing that again. I'm never slapping. No. Is it Louis Jordan that slaps her? Someone... I think Louis Jordan definitely slaps her.

But this now... So James is being told he's taken off the Blofeld case. He's pretty bummed out about it. So what he does, it says, money, penny. Take a note. I'm going to resign. I love hand it over. This is great.

It's a great exchange. The... Here, let's hear that. Sorry, everybody. God damn DVDs suck. What, what, what, what? Yeah. I've been leaving you from Operation Bedlam, W.O.Z.

But, sir, Blot felt something of a must with me. You've had two years to run him down. Does this mean you've lost confidence in me? I am well aware of your challenge, WZ. The license to kill is useless. Unless one can set up the target. I'll find you a more suitable, son. That's all.

So, under the second. That's all. He's so good. He's great. And this is, again, why I like these James Bond movies because... That was a quick talk about. Or this one. Because it's darker.

It's not as light. It's a... You feel like this is the life of an actual spy. Like, this is, or, you know, the exception of a couple... What other movies? I think there's... I think there's only... Do we only see James Bond's office one other time?

Because we see it... It's the only time, right? No, it's seen in Die Another Day. When he's at his desk cleaning his gun in the virtual reality. reality simulator thing. Oh, gosh. Do we count that? I don't know.

Do we count that movie? So here he is. This is James Bond telling Moneypenny. Take a memo, please, Moneypenny. Ready, James. Sir, I have the honor to request. You will accept my resignation. Effective forthwith.

Resignation from what? Her majesty's secret service. And kindly presented to that monument in there. And now he's, now James has entered his office. Not a bad office. His office is very pedestrian. For everything that you know of James Bond, it's extremely pedestrian. It's not cool at all.

Yeah, like what's on that bulletin board where they're just, did you see the red lines connecting everything? Is that his Blowfeld correspondence? This is rough. This is the worst. Yeah. The worst scene of the homebook. So he's pulling out moments from all the Bond films. That he keeps in his desk drawer.

Yeah. And then the thing plays. still works you picked up the rebreather like why would you keep this in your desk and Q obviously wouldn't let that happen sorry ma'am see I think he does say ma'am there

he doesn't say mum we've had this huge contention with listeners about whether in the Daniel Craig movies they're saying M-U-M or M-O-M or M-A-A-M that's ma'am for sure that right yeah sometimes mum is the way I think that it's supposed to be said but he's uh he's not doing it there so now okay so james has been requested to leave uh

requested to resign well money penny penny does a little funds she says puts in the thing for two weeks leave but then we think that maybe you know but em knows everything what's going on to i don't even talk about that i feel like em is always listening that fight that amazingly gritty realistic fight you know what's so gritty about it is there's no music playing yeah whenever they do that it just makes the fight seem way more intense. Well, that, that fight actually reminded me very much of Casino Royale. Yeah, yeah. Like, I was like, this is, and then you go, I went back and forth a lot with this movie.

This is why I like it. This is why I don't like it. Like, but I think it stands apart because this did so many cool things that I feel like the Daniel Craig movies are still. It's my problem with that fight, though. I don't like fights with guys that you punch and punch and punch and they don't react. Like, it's, that is so unrealistic. It's just such a Because I mean, I'm assuming that

James Bond's a pretty strong guy. What if you had a thing though that didn't make you feel pain? Like a bullet? Yeah, a bullet. I love that after Tracy leaves, he puts on her robe and he's just walking around in a short feminine robe. But he's used to short feminine robes.

Remember in Goldfinger? Yeah, his little Terry Cloth jumper. Yes, but that was definitely a female and she folded her robe for him and he gets into it. And you get really, close to seeing balls. The close you get to see James

Bond's balls is in this movie. This movie also, so now at this point he's decided to take his vacation time to track down Blofeld. Two weeks. That's all it takes. Two weeks is all it takes from to fall in love with Tracy.

In a montage that I would describe as the least enjoyable thing I've ever seen. I love it for how odd it is. In fact, this whole sequence, he goes to Portugal and just look on there. It doesn't look anything like a Bond movie. It looks like

some sort of, I don't know, like 60s European Bertolucci. No, this looks like a rejected land in Epcot Center's World Showcase. I love it. It's so out of place. I don't know. Well, also what I find so interesting is that I don't see James

Bond as a lover of women. Like, I don't see, like they look like they went shopping. Now they're out in a garden. I don't see him ever as that type of guy to like carry on like oh let's go for a shop we'll go shopping today and then we'll go get some tea in your mind are we dealing with a character who has been through the situation obviously i mean we are because of because of ian fleming's writing chronology so this is a guy who's been through the vespers thing yes so you know he wouldn't love again he swore yeah but see

i think this is the movies fall and a little bit at lays and bees because they don't give enough of a buildup like you don't see them falling in love enough for this to happen. It's from a far distant shot. You're just watching them stroll through different things. Give me that thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That sound thing. Because let's talk about this song. Let's talk about Louis Armstrong.

This is the last song he ever recorded. Really? Yeah. And it's going to be a sentence. He had just left Billy Crystal's house for dinner. Really? And is this the only time that a pop song has been written for a James Bond movie? Because

This was a radio hit, basically. This was a scene. It was a great, I thought it was, yeah. It's a lovely song. Here we go. Oh, that's just the orchestral thing. I love the amount of versions of things you have on your phone. Yeah, that was pretty good.

Do I not have it? Nope. Oh, that's despicable. I don't have it. But still. You really don't have it? No, it's on YouTube if you want to. Here, I can play it right now.

The scene is happening. But, I mean, again, You're seeing Bond in very different ways. And this is... Just fun. No. Pointing at engagement rings. Yeah.

Yeah, it feels like a breakfast of Tiffany. Someone put that on Twitter, right? Yeah. I was going to say, that's what it felt like to me. They're watching bears. Yeah. You think that's why he's so scared of the bear later on? Yes.

But, boop, bo, do. But I will also. say, and this is where I have an issue with pace. Yes, go ahead. This movie is a lot of, it's, I feel like the whole movie is just treading water up until, like, and there are things I like, but the hotel fight is cool, and there are cool moments, but it just feels like,

it feels a little rudderless until you get, you know, until we get a little bit further in. We'll talk about the fact that now, so he needs to find out, there's a lawyer that might have ties to Blofeld, so Bond heads over there to do some bond work. And what he does is he goes upstairs, here's happens to hear the guy's going to be gone for exactly an hour. And then from the construction site, from the drug construction site across the city.

By the way, love this. He is delivered to him. This guy we never meet that helps him throughout the movie and dies. And by the way, that is again another reason why I'm like, this makes sense. This is like, of course James Bond has an ally that is facilitating things. and they're not like, you know, they're working in tandem, but I love the idea of it.

I loved everything about how the whole sequence is good. Also, I enjoy George Lazy's reactions to the Playboy magazine that he decides to look through. He's just staring at a Playboy like a pervert. The guy can wear a suit, though. No, God. That's what I'm saying. You put him in Brooks Brothers ad.

Yeah, he's got to have a good time. And actually, he does try a little bit of a, well, we'll talk about it in a bit, but a little bit of a character when he does go. up to the mountain top. Yeah, and part of that is the ADR. Yeah. Yeah, so he's Safecracker.

And then, you know, I'm assuming as a person watching this in 1969, the idea that the man brought a scanner and a copier, amazing. Yeah, would have blown this. And I feel like that Safecracker thing could work. They made it in such a way that doesn't seem like some Roger Moore thing where he just puts a little square on there. Yeah, it's like a vacuum tube. kind of thing that yeah I like that too but my question is is this is this gentleman that's

helping him the blonde guy is he working is he in the service yes I would assume he's a part of for draco no no he is he's a he's a James Bond like MI 6 guy he's not if he can be because he's not supposed to be doing this yeah he's not supposed to be doing this at all I think he's a drako guy really that's also why he looks so seedy with his dyed hair and he swore they all the same ooh I didn't think about that I guess you guys are right but I think it's adorable he's going to feed the paper in one one sheet of the time why do you take off his watch that was the issue that i had and now i'm looking at it again i'm remembering like what was he's got an hour and oh i get to do this this is too much for him yeah he just wants to have it in front of his

face uh that guy by the way uh i enjoy i enjoyed i enjoyed the silent man yeah but here's a cool thing i got really loud yeah i got really loud about this he does this he does this he does this he gets the documents he needs. He says, okay, this is where we're going. Go to the Alps. James Bond goes to M's house. Yes. So then M is studying lepidoptery.

Can you rewind it to when he goes, oh, lepidoptery? And the way M looks at Bond, both like I'm impressed and also, you little prick. Yes. And again, another favorite thing that I love is one of these characters

go to their homes. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love that this is where he lives. Yeah. It's very polite.

for what you think. Yeah. Which is the opposite of like M's little townhouse. Listeners, you're just going to have to remember this when you watch it. He rings a bell, a physical old bell, and then a butler. Hammond. Is the Admiral in? Certainly, sir.

Hammond. Here we go. It's got it. And a velvet. Excuse me, sir. Command of Bond to see you. Right, Sherman. I, sir.

If you please, sir, thank you. Unusually small from them fellas polyclores. I wasn't aware that your expertise included lepidoptery What are you doing here That's what you're only One of the things I hate is when Bond knows everything Well I mean and that's

There's a scene in here that's clearly 80 art And it's a little bit earlier when Like he eats the caviar and he's like Oh yeah But he's eating Yeah he's off camera 100% But it's like But it's a cooler thing

It seems to just like scoop up The handful of caviar and eat it And like after his fight walk out like you know it's like I don't need to like analyze by the way there's such a weird tradition of James Bond beating the shit out of someone and then grabbing a food like a small food like a gray or like you know he always comes like in Thunderball even he goes back into the room very quick grab the roll roll and pops it's like I'm good I'm good to go the depth of bond knowing something I think is in Moonraker when they talk about the poisonous flower and he knows the Latin

name yes it's just oh god but yet he makes simple mistakes because when he talks about the genealogy thing, he makes a huge fuck up. So the one thing that he's supposed to be aware of, he has made a mistake on. So let's hear, this is now, James Bond has gone under disguise as one of the, Sir Hillary Bray.

Yes. Sir Hillary Bray. Before we play this clip, I would like to just ask because again, my knowledge of James Bond, I feel like is big, but not as deep as you guys. Is this the only time, besides the fact when Sean Connery became Asian, but he didn't even really put on a voice for that

that James Bond puts on a voice. It is not the only time he puts on a voice. Okay. But it is the most extensive undercover work you ever see James Bond do it. When does he put on another voice? Not Karznan puts on a voice as... That makes sense. As I'm trying to think of...

Is he like German or something? What does he do? Yeah. He speaks German. Well, I guess that's not a voice. That's just speaking of language. But yeah, does he ever do like another accent or a voice? That's what I'm saying?

This is the... This really stuck out to me because it seems to be a staple of what you would need to do. I know. Diamonds are forever. Right when that Peter Hunt or what, Peter, someone graves or whatever, the guy that he's disguised as comes to see Tiffany Casey and he goes, I speak English too. Yes. And he also does it. He does the Russian accent in World is Not Enough.

Oh, and it's horrible. Yeah. Yeah. It's bad. But this is the most extensive, because I mean, I would say 30% of this movie, he speaks like we're about to hear. And he didn't know that he was going to be dubbed. They never told him until he saw the movie. Wait, wait, he didn't do his own dubbing?

I didn't know he did that voice. I thought he did that. I thought that was him. It's the genealogy guy. He goes, the real Sir Hillary that he goes and talks to and gets all the information from. They later had him come back in and redub his disguise voice. Listen to it. Whoa, I didn't know that.

Sir Hillary Gray Barone. The same, your lady. I'm for an Irma Punt, personal secretary to the cop. How'd you do? Have you had a good journey? No, quite intolerable. I'm not a good traveler, I'm afraid. See, it's not.

Wow, I thought that was him just doing a voice. They do some really good... They do really good ADR in these movies. Most of the characters in the early Bond movies are ADR. Well, Blofeld is totally ADRs, right? No, no, no, it's not Bluffet. I mean, Goldfinger, yes. Do you know what's interesting, too, is the guy on the beach

at the very beginning of this movie, his voice is the same as the boat captain and Dr. No. It probably is. No, it's exactly the same. Yeah, it's the same voice. Remember the guy that says, All right, move along. Yeah.

And that's like a broccoli. I bet you that's like a broccoli relative to the broccoli. Like, you'll be on this one too. But that's a kind of ingenious move because I didn't really catch that that was... Wow, that's funny. I feel like once I heard it, it was so obvious that I can hear it. Well, now that you've said it, yes. Now that you have said it, you ruined it for me.

I actually was like, wow, he's a good actor. He pulled off that voice. He really committed to it. So now he's being taken up to this magical place. So badly. really needs to visit. Trying to talk my girlfriend into honeymooning there.

Yeah? First into marrying me and then Where is, does this exist? Yes, yes, and now it's basically a James Bond tourist attraction. Oh, really? A whole exhibit up there and everything. Because it was built,

it was, well, it was finished for the movie, correct? I think so. Yeah, they had to put the helicopter pad on there for emergencies, like that was the rule of... This cinematography, this, this, stuff is amazing. I want Bond to go back to the Alps so bad. Well, you know, it was such a time, like skiing. Like, there was so much skiing in, like, five James Bond movies.

Like, wow. Yeah, and you haven't seen him the last time was Brazen. It's just, I don't know. Yeah. He's doing a, James is doing a good job of pretending to be sick in the helicopter. And now they're going up in the Alps. I don't think we need to hear this part. There's just bob sleds going down.

You're getting to see, you're getting a little foreshadow. of the things that will come into play. Yes, there is Bob sledding, but let's take a look at this. Also, never before you guys know that theory of Chekhov and the gun, if you introduce a gun, it has to go off. Yeah, yeah. It will never be satisfied.

It totally applies to that artwork on the wall here, those little spikes that end up getting that. Oh, yeah. Why would anybody put that on the wall? Just traps. But yeah, this place is real, and it exists. So it's a hotel in real life. I think it's just a restaurant.

Because there is a cable car that goes up there. Okay, got it. which I guess I mean we should probably do that right yeah that's really a live episode should be amazing you're coming out for it Paul? I will come out this with you a lot of it

so we've met we've met I keep want to call her Clem but it's not it's blunt yeah now she's a bigger deal in the book too like she and Blofeld really are this weird but I want to say they're

married or something they have some weird thing going on. And you only live twice, he kills both of them at the same time, like in some really violent way in a room, like just with his hands or something. Yeah, so he's gone up to this place. Now, this... Okay, go continue. Blofeld's cover up here is that he's opened up an allergy research institute. This is where it gets a little... Yeah, an allergy research institute up in the Alps.

which to the point not a bad place to open one nothing out there you know no there's no no nothing grown so you're good I would say his knowledge of what an allergy is is questionable

yes sure sure also the girl that's allergic to chicken yeah I'm sure it's an allergy and forgive me listeners and the podcast but I will say Blofeld should know what Bonn looks like right oh many times

Yeah, many times. Yeah. Because in the books, oh, this one actually comes first, I think, because that's why they don't recognize each other. This is the first, I can't, no, because they never meet in Thunderball. Then this one comes, then you only live twice,

but the movie you only live twice comes first, so it doesn't make any sense that they don't recognize it. Yeah. It really doesn't. So what you're seeing here is Bond, obviously, he goes to a place. It's an allergy research place, and if James Bond's going there,

then what do you think the patients are going to be like, guys? Oh, hot ladies. That's right. As hot as the ladies in the man with the golden gun. They hang around the pool and like fur bikinis. Like these are beautiful men. But I oddly, like, maybe I don't want to be weird, but I think that James Bond picks probably the one of the less hotter of the ladies.

I'm talking about Ruby Bartlett. Yeah. You know what? She's grown on me to the point where somehow she's my favorite. Oh, wow. I don't know what it is. You know, she just died recently. Oh, Ruby.

Sorry, Ruby. Let's see. Yeah, for a second I thought, by the way, that was Diana Reid. When I was watching the one on the right when he walks into the room. This is where you see the full furl of Bond. This is where you see the full Austin Powers shirt that James Bond is wearing with the kilt. He's got the kilt going on. I realize that that I never really put it together, that he took it from this movie.

Wow. Took what? The Austin Powers costume. Oh, right. Yeah, essentially this one. So let's hear these These women are amazing You have a point, right?

Yeah She looks pretty odd She reminds me of Meg Ryan My favorite conversation scene is around the dinner table When they're all eating Please come to meet our patience You know what? You're not wrong

Let's bring this word What they're saying is crazy And now girls I'm sure Sarah would like to tell us About the colors of arms in long They're all eating Whatever they're supposedly alert If you'd really enjoy that.

Please. Come on. Yeah. Would you? Just eating. One girl looks like the girl from a big bad place. The Herald's college or college of arms consists of 30...

The Asian is eating rice. The Indian is eating a non-bread. That's the most offensive thing. Black girl is eating a banana. And just a plate of three bananas. That's... Really, really racist.

It's... It's the... I think it's the most blatantly racist a James Bond movie has been. And that is, I want to say that's straight out of Fleming because also the fact that Bond has to go undercover as a gay guy. He's so oddly, like, fascinated with homosexuality and lesbians. And he just must have an issue with it. I don't know. Not that the gay thing is a problem in this, but the other movies.

Did you ever read the James Bond books that were like, I forget who wrote them? Oh, John Gardner, the white ones? No, I haven't. I read them a lot when I was. as a kid. I love the John Gardner books just because I felt like, oh, I can watch more James Bond movies if I read these, but I don't know if any of them hold

up in it. I should, because I have long drive so I should do it. Do you remember any specific ones? You know, they're all pretty boilerplate in their thing, but the new one is supposed to be very good. I just read one I did like it actually, yeah. I just read one, hang on. Let me just

pull out my candle here and I'm trying to remember what the name of it was. Uh, chisina royale. No, no, no, no. Hunger Games. High time to kill. Yes, is that the new one? It's, uh, no, it's Raymond Benson.

Oh, yeah. And, uh, I liked it. Yeah? I liked High Time to Kill. Guys, it's good to know that James Bond is still alive in books. Kids get out there and read something. Yeah. Uh, but let's go back to the, uh, most racist scene in the race.

Yeah. Racist roundtables. Racist roundtable. The type of offices are of great antiquity. How can do it? When I tell. And this is not a fake backdrop. They're...

It's amazing. It's amazing. In 1448. Yeah, the... Now, when we authorize a coat of arms, it can include all sorts of funny things. Princess Leia before Leia. The most boring.

These women are in rapture. Gold balls. I've brought a book on the subject with me. There's a picture of... My own coat of arms, actually, which includes four of them. If it's fair to see them. I'd love to. No, no.

He will give the book to me. Maybe they don't talk. I'm sorry, if I miss. I will pass it to everyone in turn. I just remember that scene being so weird. Why were, oh, why are girls so fascinated by how many balls? Like, it's like, I have four balls. Twice the man.

There's so much more semen, you know. That's what women like. They like Seaman. I'm sure one of them's in there for an analogy to that, right? Yeah. So anyway, James then obviously makes it his duty to fuck the girls. Can we talk about Telly Savalas for a beat? And to say, like, what do you guys think of Telly Savalas?

I'm going to go out and say, I like Telly Savalas. I feel like he can pull off. I think he has a decent blow, though. Yeah, I feel like he is realistic in his everything. I feel like he's up, but in my opinion, I think he's a little too... Who's the best? The definitive blowfield in my brain is, is... Donald Pleasins.

I feel like I like both those guys, but that the best Blofeld has yet to be seen. Well, I think if they get Blowfell back for this next film and they do it well, it could be really good. Who would you put in that? We were talking about that. It's a tough call. Well, my immediate mind went to something that I'm going to just blur it out, but I don't have any thought to it. It's like, oh, if you shaved Phillips any more hot. That's what he said.

That's exactly what I said. That's exactly what I say. I'm afraid they'll do Kevin Spacey and I don't want that. Oh. They can't do Kevin Spacey because Kevin Spacey played Dr. Evil in the movie in gold. Remember in Gold member? Yes. He did?

They do a quick, they do a scene where they're shooting a James Bond movie. Oh, good. Yeah, right. So he's out and so is the Danny DeVito. He was also Lex Luthor. Right. Bald-headed down. Again, just because he was bald.

I'm trying to think it's tough because you're trying to think. It's tough because you're trying to think. think of a man of girth. Like, or of, of, uh, of a,

of a, he can't be a skinny. Yeah, he's a heft. But what I like about the idea of Philip Seymour Hoffman is the fucking, Philip Seymour Hoffman can be the most creepy person you've ever seen. Yes. In, in,

in, like, the, I always think back to punch trunk love. Oh, yeah. And I always think back to him on the phone with Sandler. Just like, just fucking,

just going off on him. He's so good, but I'm, I'm afraid I'm starting to see his tricks. like what happened with Kevin Spacey and like Anthony Hopkins after a while you just start to see them acting a little bit. Right. And I can't tell if that's starting to happen. Yeah.

Because I saw that new Hunger Games movie and it may just be that he didn't want to be there. Oh, that's interesting. Maybe you go, I mean, I'm just, the other person, well, these are not good ideas. That blow felt is a good question. It's a very like, because it's like, it's a very specific type of person that you would need. We did say Brian Cranston would be interesting. That's just an obvious choice of thing. Yeah, right now.

Yeah, I don't know. But I do, I keep going back to Philip C. Morhoffman. I think Phillipsiemer Hoffman would be, also the way his, when he's in Mission Impossible Three, he's good in that. He's really good as the bad guy in that. Yeah, yeah. Which makes me think he wouldn't do this. Right.

Like not do a James By the guy. Yeah, you've been a franchise villain before. Yeah, you've done it. You've done it. But Sam Mendi's might be able to call. How about like someone like, um, Michael, Shannon or something like that.

You know, like you go in a way of like it's a little different but like I'm trying to think of like an intense actor. People have been tweeting about him for Jaws

if they were to bring Jaws back that he would be a great Jaws. Oh, that would be amazing. Oh yeah, he would be great. There's got to be the perfect Blofeld. There is and I'm sure

they'll find it because I, they found it probably will be an unknown guy or a guy who's got a couple Indies. Yeah. Yeah. No, I don't know.

I mean, throwing Harvey or Bardeen in the last one. That was great. I mean, he's a well-known. He is, but he's not at the tip of your tongue well-known. I feel like he's still kind of skirts. Like, he's not a franchised kind of guy.

He's a respected guy to his weird shit. I think the Quantum of Salas villain would have been a good blowfell. He's great. Imagine him bald with those beady eyes. Yeah. Oh, God. I love Quantum of Salas. Let's hear a little Tally Savalas here.

You love Quantum of Salas? I do. upon revisiting it and watching it right after Casino Royale. When I first saw it in the theater, I only saw it the one time. Yeah. It was four or five years before I rewatched it.

Okay. And then I rewatched it and I was like, oh, yeah, I guess that was okay. But then someone online, someone on Twitter said to me, watch it right after you watch Casino Royale. When you watch it as one giant four and a half hour movie, yeah.

It's great. It really is. It's not as good as Casino Real, but I'm saying that I think it's going to do with this did because it's like the ardiest bond film you'll ever seen and you don't you don't realize it right away but yeah if you go back and pay attention to what it looks like yeah and uh just the just the through line through the movie is just he wants revenge right and that's all he's doing throughout the movie you know which i guess is what he does in license to kill you know

but it takes a little bit more time yeah yeah that's what i'm here to find out to confirm sir hillary there can be no doubt of the truth please sit down yeah if there were no doubt I'm sure the College of Arms would not have sent me. Well, since you are here, I'll make everything very plain to you. To begin with, I was born without yellow. Even though you can clearly see them taped up behind me. Like the Habsburg lip or the hawk nose of the Medici's. Poor Medici's.

I know. So that's a little bit of Telly Savalas, just being blowfilled. I love that kind of dialogue, though. The Hapsburg lip. Then what's interesting is, so he's got these 12 girls that he, that he's treating for allergies, which he's just turning into agents of his. And by the way, the, oh, well, yes, I thought, yeah, you can continue. So what you do, James Bond in the midst of betting one of the young ladies, he gets previewed to what is happening. And as soon as the DVDs.

Can I ask, though, why is he betting this woman? Isn't Diana, like, why? That's a good question, because if we're to believe that he's really falling in love with this woman enough, like, I think I'm going to marry this woman. I mean, maybe he doesn't know that at this point. But he is just carelessly sleeping with more than one woman with no consequences, no morality, no ethics. And it's a very, I mean, in this world, it's a very un James Bond moment in a way. Because, like, well, we got to have him fuck somebody.

He probably just at this point assumes, well, they're in an allergy. They can't have anything. Uh. I had a very interesting case. How right she was. Oh, Hilly. Hilly.

Oh, bother. No, Hilly. It's part of the cure. So, now there's... So strange. LSD lights happening. And I love Blofeld in front of his line of tape reporters. A beautiful thing.

And that the other guy can't put him in. He has to have him handed him to him like a scalpel. The next movie, Blofeld's plan also revolves around a cassette. That's right. Do you remember when you first came here how you ate it, chicken? How you were sick when you even saw what? This tape has got to exist. I want this album.

For I have shown you how foolish it was, and your cure is nearly done. I have taught you to love chickens. To love their flesh, their voice. What? Their voice. your cure is nearly done. And soon, Shadyl,

which you love so much. You do love me just a little, don't you? But I must teach you one more thing before you think. Ruby. I must teach you how to give them special care. I will tell you what to do. Ruby.

I will tell you again. I will tell you how. And after you've done what I teach you, you will forget it forever. And it's... I mean, amazing. Amazing. This is an amazing scene.

Okay, now, guys, guess what? We're one halfway through this movie. Let's skip ahead here. Well, this is actually where the movie does. You can kind of skip ahead because this is, like, this is, again, why the pacing of this movie is a little bit odd. Like, I feel like you could probably make this an hour and 45-minute movie that would have really, like, just rocked. Because it just, there's a lot of just, like, okay, we're out. Even his escape from this compact

A long time. Yeah, that cable car. The cable car thing. Yeah, he's waiting for the cable car. Also, when he gets knocked out by Irma Bunt in Ruby's room or the other girls room, I can't remember, and it goes to that trippy slow motion. That's another moment.

I didn't know I was in a Bond movie. Well, that was like another try it. Something interesting, but it's also like, stylistically it was odd. Like, why are you doing a slow-mo stutter step for getting hit in the back of the head? Oh, we didn't talk about the boner joke. Which was?

I'm having a little bit of stiffness right now. Oh, that's right. Yeah. That is precisely. But that is, I think that's one of the, one of the better, one of the better you can believe it. James Bond Pott. I would, I don't mind that. I don't mind it, but I still think it was like, it's a surprising boner joke.

So he's discovered by Blofeld. Then he has, he must escape. I don't know why Blofeld decides to just throw him in. this watch tower, I mean the cable car tower, which looks like you're inside of a giant clock. But this is on the way he shows him his blonde-headed buddy is dead. In the weirdest set, I can't grasp

how, because there's a mountain immediately behind him, but he's hanging somewhere. Can you go to that? Yeah, sure. Well, he's like hanging upside down like kind of like Luke is hanging in the cave in Empire. Yeah, yeah. Exactly like Uh, uh,

right now, it's right before that. They just showed him. I love also he's just in a cardigan. This looks like Ward Cleaver. Yeah. You know what? In the meanwhile, I will keep you here as my guest.

You'll be very useful in helping to convince the authorities. Look at that. That I mean what I say. Cigarette. And I'll do what I claim. Come, let me show you to your new quarters. I love this set. The set's in James Bond.

You're likely to be with us for some time, Mr. Bond. So first, a little therapy to soothe your restless nature. Oh. Positively. He was restless. So where is he hanging from right now? He's hanging just... As though he had climbed up this.

That's not a huge mountain in the distant background? No, no, no. I think you're seeing a reflection of him like underneath the helipad. And he's tied to the helipad, and that's just the reflection of that through the window or something. He's not on the mountain.

We may never know, guys. I have a feeling that he's literally hanging from the helipad. I think you're right, and that mountain is in the distant background. Yes, that's what I think. It does look like he's hanging from this mountain. It looks like he's suspended between two mountains, which is the name of my new memoir.

Okay, you're zipping through some things we got to. Go, go, go, go. Well, that ski fight and that whole ski sequence and how it shot is amazing. They put that cinematographer in a parachute harness, really? Hanging below a helicopter so he could turn 360 degrees with the camera. And then the guy that's shooting these ski sequences, Willie Bogner was like an Olympic skier,

and he would ski backwards holding the camera between his legs. Whoa. And that's, just, just play a little bit of that. I will as soon as the DVD drive wakes up. Good Lord. Matt brought in one of those backs of SUV DVD plays. I love that Blowfeld is just a champion ski. Oh, yeah.

So this is a guy just holding a camera right now on skis. It's amazing. It looks great. This is actually one of my favorite James Bond skis. Yeah, me too. Yeah, I think it's the best. Again, Dave. What is this day for night thing?

Day for night all the time. They had to back then. They couldn't really do it any other way. Oh, really? Yeah, back in those days, the film exposure and the lighting, you had to shoot at dusk or in the day. Too bad the background rear projecting looks so shitty because everything else looks so good. It's amazing seeing like in-camera stunts that are not like digital or anything of that.

I mean, it's a very like watching that. Today, it was like, oh, it's, you don't see such long action sequences that feel, like, yeah, these are all professional skiers. That's why I got bummed in Skyfall when they start to use a little CG and stuff. Yeah. Because usually the bonds keep it real. Yeah. The bonds keep it real. They do.

They do. They do. Then a lot of that is thanks to the amazing stunt crew they had that would just follow them through every movie. Yeah. So James then, he escapes, he gets away from the mountain. He ends up down in the little town. where he just happens to run it to Tracy. And this is the only Bond Christmas movie there is.

Yes, I was so excited about that. And like all good Christmas movies, it's super dark. Like there's a dark element to it and we'll get to that more. But this movie, I love a dark, it's a sad Christmas. Oh, go ahead. Well, there's this song playing in the background that was also written for this movie called Where Do Christmas Trees Come From? What?

Whoa. God, I wish I had that too. I do like, and I talked about this earlier, but I'll bring it up again, James Bond's frightenedness of seeing a bear, a stuffed bear with a bullhorn. He screams. If you can see that, there's some of a weird sound he makes when he comes across that bear. Did we miss it? I think we may have missed it because once he teams.

No, no. It's coming up. Right? Oh, no, no. He runs into it. So I think it's right before he sits down. Or is it? Or maybe right after it.

It's once he meets Diana. rig, it's done. The bear is done. But a guy who is, you know, nerves of steel, you wouldn't expect him to be frightened by a stuff bare. Yeah, I want to say something about that too, because there's something interesting about this. I'll wait for this bear thing to happen.

We can talk about it's happening. We can hear a Christmas song, too. Yeah. They need love. The Christmas trees need love. I feel like throughout this chase, when he gets with Tracy and everything, there are moments where he's generally afraid. You never see that in a Bond movie.

Here goes. Here goes. Yeah, that is weird. A polar bear with a camera. And there's a look of fright on his face. It gets impressionistic, but I really feel like he's afraid here. He's afraid for his life. And you don't get that enough in a Bond film. The only other time I felt that is in Casino Royale when he's about to be tortured.

He doesn't know what's going to happen. And when he has that heart attack thing where he has to start? Yeah. But when's another time when Bond has seemed legitimately afraid? You're right. Like a chasing, he always seems like he's slightly like, ha ha, I got away. I like what he's vulnerable like that. Yeah, but he has nothing.

He has no gun. He has nothing. I know. And there's three people after him. You should be afraid. Yeah. But in other times, Brazen would just be strutting through town, acting with his job. Well, let's not talk about the fact that he now winds up finding and running to Tracy who is there.

Which is such a, again, another coincidental like, okay, she's here now. Yeah, but she says she's looking for him. She went to look after him because she knew her father told her where he was. Okay. So she went there. Got it. And then they go through this chase that happens to end up in a rally race. Which is amazing.

Which is actually a fucking gorgeous looking thing. Yes, again. The lighting is great in it the whole time. It's just, it's well done. Because this they could shoot at night because they have lighting. Yeah. But the car scene, I love it. And then you get the impression, I got the impression through this whole situation that she at some point.

had gone to race driving school or something like that and that Bond knew this and that's why he was okay with her driving the whole time. I think he just knows she's a capable woman. But she's just like having a great time. You know what? You make the argument that she's really the first independent Bond girl because even Pussy Galore changes to Bonds whim, he changes to hers. Yeah. And that's never been done as well.

You're absolutely right. And that's sort of what makes her, what makes her, you go, oh, of course, of course that she is the one that he marries. Yeah. And it's so, it's so, okay, so now, so this, then they chase, they find them, they're driving down this, this empty road, of course,

in Switzerland, so there's just feet of snow on either side of their car, and then they end up at this barn. And they end up at a barn in a scene where you see, you see James Bond sort of I don't know if he's just like so grateful that she saved his life again or what but he I think you have to fill in the blanks

because it's not in the movie but my guess would be that he thought he was going to die and he goes from that to kind of being rescued by someone he realized I do love this woman yeah yeah and uh I'm sure this is still my job but there isn't anything you can go about your job at the moment

is there? Mm-hmm. Are you thinking about it now? I'm not He's best in this scene I think Yeah I'm thinking about us

Audition scene for sure Yeah I feel like you can always tell What scene They're used to do And he's And he shouldn't Should be concerned

With anything But himself I understand We just have to go on the way we are I have to find something else to do I love you I know I'll never find Another girl like you

Will you marry me You can you guys should know we're all holding hands but again I just got caught up in this scene I'm like going out watching the scene it's a great scene it's a nice little

soft focus yeah a little vathleen on the helen this movie probably has the least amount of music in that he repeats the same thing over and over it's like there's very few variations

on this theme it's just this I don't know what she's wearing it's also a more romantic love scene than you're used to like he has sex Oh, the part where... And this is gonna sound really gay guys.

But the part where he puts her in her own bed, I was like, aw, James. And then when he does that, I'm like, yeah, James. But this is coming off of, what, maybe 24 hours ago, fucking that girl who's allergic to chicken. Yeah, but she has no other allergies. You're fine.

So at this point, they are found skiing. So they have a wonderful night together. Yeah. Where they're now committed to each other. And they have a wonderful ski in the morning. just go for a recreational ski, it seems. Well, they got to get down the mountains still. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, they're out of gas. I forgot. They're out of gas. Yeah. Just like us right now. So what they're doing is they're found, they're found obviously by Blofeld's people. And Diana Rigg is knocked out, taken to the top of the mountain. But wait, what about the guy jumping into the snowblower?

I love it. The guts is very far go. Yeah, more guts than a human could possibly. It's as it. And the avalanche is impressive too. Yeah. Oh, it's right there. Guy goes into snowboard.

It's like end of jaws style blood. Yeah. It's like, it is amazing. It's like Roy Shider had just said, smile, you son of a bitch. And Tracy is dressed like Blowfelt in this. This is a great, this is a great shot of Tully Savalas. We're in the flesh-colored ski helmet or hat.

She also liked. But then we end up, so now that, now that, so throughout this chase, Diana Rigg ends up getting taken after an avalanche is caused. But the shot, what I love, I love the shot of him staring out of M's office window, which you're going to see here in a second. Is this the most visits with M of any James Bond? Yeah, it has to be a lot of him. So he sees that.

And then it just fucking, I love that. I love that. And now he's just staring out M's window. window, this I could do with that. Oh, wow, I don't think I... I don't know I've caught that before. Yeah, neither did I. Yeah, so what you're seeing,

reflected in the window is Diana Rig being taken away. So that's obviously tells you what he's thinking about. Yeah, he's not just staring out of window. So here he is in his, in his, in his, in his, in his office again. I think that's a studio note, by the way. Like, oh, this is replaying somebody.

So he's waiting to find out. I understand. The plan, Blofeld's plan in this essentially, is to hold the world hostage by threatening to release that's the weak in mouth disease or something like that. It's so unplausible that you could hypnotize a group of things.

I mean obviously, Charles Manson did it plenty. But it's also like it's the most absurd but yet also grounded and aware. It seems so like wait, that's it. It's so big but it's also like it doesn't seem big. I mean, the way it's executed isn't seem big. But also what he wants

is to be pardoned. So all the everybody has to do is go, you got it, buddy. Turn it off. I would also like you guys. And now you're, now we're going to kill you. To note the lighting in M's office right now. And note the end of Skyfall. Oh, well, to me, I love the end of Skyfall.

It's almost the exact lighting. Yeah, yeah, that's true. That they use in Skyfall too. Like there's no, it's, you know, it's a, you know, after, late afternoon outside. No real light. And it's the same, like, the ship. I love that.

That was my favorite. I never gotten more excited by a scene. in that last scene in sky I hate getting excited by the end of a movie because like now I'm gonna wait so long that was so well done

it was such a great like they better follow through on that yeah Bernard Lee's amazing by the way I know we've said that before so James

Tracy and Blowfeld is great too James can't he can't Em says nobody you hang out we gotta deal with this it's not like our concern what's happening to Tracy

so he goes over to Tracy's dad Tracy's dad says, sure, here's three helicopters, my best men, and we're going to go take down Blowfield. And they look badass in these. They really do. Yeah, I love this. This is reminiscent of that one where they climb the mountain. What's that?

Oh, for your eyes only? Yeah, they look great in those things, too. Yeah. That ski vest on. You wish to commit murder. I told you, the Sunmercy flight. And we're coming up on what may be the coolest James Bond, the mood. Yeah.

Ever. And Diana Rigg, of course, is hearing this, hearing that it's her father. So, obviously, why not touch a chandelier? And oddly in the chandelier are just pictures of her father up here. Chandelier is scalloped potatoes. Look at the scenery of it. It's great. You've got meg fighters flying by them.

That's what he means, migs. Tell me more. This is military air control. There is no record of your mission. So essentially what they're going to do is storm. They're going to storm the castle. Yeah, storm the castle. Diana Rigg has a couple fights of her own

with particularly one gentleman who does not enjoy being knocked down. We miss this shooting slide with the bond thing. Let's watch the shooting slide. It's the only time you get the bond theme in this movie too. Oh, you're right. And we were going to talk about the smoking thing, right? Well, the what? The, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the.

The test tube? Oh, the acid thrown at James Bond? Oh, right, right. One of my favorite moments in this movie. Let's see both of them. I think it's already happened. Yeah, so basically, just one of my favorite things,

like they're having a fight inside, and one of the scientists just has a bubbling, smoking brew in a test tube, throws it at James Bond, James Duck, and it has burnt a hole in the world. in the wall. Like, what was that? And why was it easily contained in the glass test tube?

But when it came on contact with something else, it ate through glass. Yeah. Maybe it was just the act of, it was volatile when it was moved or something? Maybe. I love that the guy's like, get my test tubes.

It doesn't even really have to a much great effect. It just kind of like misses. It's a nuisance. And you're not, you're not privy to what it was. We didn't miss it. I was right. Because he doesn't get off the plane until... So, okay, that one's landing.

This is the most well-executed... Yeah, plan that I've ever seen in a James Bond movie. I like when James Bond has buddies. Yeah. To figure out something like to do a attack. Yeah. Now, but what I don't like what's happened in Skyfall, and I think it's going to be an interesting thing

that they're going to have to deal with, is I don't like that he's always got someone in his ear and he can always be communicating with something. Yeah. No more. sidekits. You can have helpers and allies and mentors, but earwigs are

tough. Yeah. You want them to be a little bit more to his own wits. She's a badass. She's great. I mean, she is Emma Peel. You kind of want her own series. Like, yeah, you want like the Mrs. James Bond series, like Mrs. Clumbo.

This is, was this after the Avengers? Uh-huh. For her? Yeah. Yeah, right. Just, I look, I think that there should be a track you could have on your phone of the James Bond theme with gunfire and helicopter noises in it. That shot is interesting, too. It's amazing just watching competent people. Yeah, do it.

And this is, I think the action in this movie is really well done. And you would argue because it's done by the second, the second AD director. Yeah, she was doing Avengers. 61. Oh, well, this is like literally right at the end. She was doing Avengers from 61 to 69. There it is. There it is.

That's so badass. That's him sliding on the ice. So this movie was 68 or 69? 69. So she probably was shooting this during her last season of the event. Yeah. Now, was that because didn't she leave the Avengers and then Honor Blackman did another one? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Honor Blackman did. Oh, so maybe she did leave it. Yeah, because Honor Blackman did 43 episodes. So essentially what this movie ends with is a bobsled chase down a mountain. Again, a bobsled, something only powered by momentum. Yes.

And gravity. And what I think is an amazingly brutal sort of way for Blowfeld to seemingly go, which is to just get clipped. But also get clipped. With that, with the legs hanging. It doesn't work right. Clipped by a... But it's a brutal fight they're having right now. Yeah. It is. And that's why I don't like this comical beat of his legs hanging at the end.

I think it's just to show you that he's lifeless. It's like, it's this old school filmmaking that we got him hammered in. He's brunged off. And that line, that 80-yard line. Brasht off. You got to be kidding. It's not the time of the place. So now we have seven minutes left of this film and this is it. This is my favorite. This is now as a kid, I want to like just break into this first. second.

And as a kid, this was, blew my mind. The ending of this movie blew my mind. Because did not know that you could do something like they're going to do. So they shot this ending with the initial intention to open the next movie with this. So this would be the ending, them driving off that crane shot. That's where they do a masterful crane shot of him leaving the wedding. And they would open the next movie with her getting killed. But they decided to keep it in.

of my best operative. Thank God they did, because they would never have, they've never been able to figure out of it. They just referenced Goldfinger again. What did they say? The November 64 Bullion job?

Oh, yeah. Congratulations, L.S. I must confess that I've sometimes thought you a little, irresponsible. Exactly, that's exactly the word. Thank you. This time, my boy, I can't come.

Now, they kind of, they kind of pick it up. You get, like, I mean, it's in the beginning, again, I'm sorry with names, but the beginning of that, the first Roger and Moore movie, right? Don't they? Or is it where he's like, for your eyes only? Yeah, for your eyes only is not the first one. It's also referenced in

license to kill or living daylights. He was married once. Licensed to kill. Yeah. But they don't they dispose of Blofeld so easily in the opening sequence, like he's there at the gravesite. Yeah, which was them just saying, fuck you McClory. Okay. We don't need your guy. Okay.

Is that? Yes, Papa? Look, James. I think the scene here. I know that we haven't always exactly seen. Well, anyway, don't forget, if there's anything you ever need. The scene between him and money, if I mean the look that they exchanged, I think it's so right. Yeah, it's really nice. Remember, obey your husband in all things.

Jeez. I love his response to listen. As I've always obeyed you. Oh, God. Well, James, I wish you luck. For the first and last time, remember? You just can remember. An old proverb.

her prices far above rubies or even your million pounds Teresa just because you're Mrs. Bond don't forget my birthday next year both of you are make me all of you beautiful moment

really is but can I just would you think it out of out of like like to me this movie reeks of the choice they could have made for this they didn't do was like just seeing a lot of old James Bond

like characters from the first movie's all so. Like the Big Fish funeral? Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So Felix Liders there. Yeah, you have that. And I would,

yeah, I don't even... Coral son, Coral Jr. Yeah. It would be great. Like, I feel like you would even... For whatever reason, it's... I think it was a restraint that they even didn't put the villains there. Like, you didn't say like...

What if all his other lovers were there? They were like Pissigalora, Tatiana, all these women that loved him just pull up behind her while Money Penny's crying and they're all weeping as well. Come on. On your way.

Sad money money. Are you guys reading Velvet, by the way? Now, should we be? I, uh, the Ben Acker's telling me about that. It's, uh, it's, it's, it's, Ed Brubaker's new comic, and it's basically the idea is, what if Money Penny, uh, was, like, the James, like, like, she's behind this elaborate plot. Like, it basically opens with, like, Money Penny being framed of killing James Bond.

It's awesome. You should definitely read it. It's not James Bond, but it's so, in the style of the 60s, it's so perfect. It's so good. I guarantee you that you both will like it. I can go downstairs right now and get a copy of it. All right. I should do it.

So that was to be the end. This beautiful. I love it. You know. In Portugal. Great way to end the movie. Yeah. Miss Moneypenny.

What would you do without me? I always cry at weddings. 007 never had any respect for government property. That hat is government property? It probably has like bullets in it or something. something. You know, I haven't given you a wedding present yet. I had an idea about that.

Three girls, three boys. Pleased? Hmm, not bad for a start. But darling, now we have all the time in the world. I like how it said smooches. Yeah, smoochies and me. He's got a point we do look like it had for a flower shop. That reminds me.

I didn't even send you flowers. Now, this is suspect. Why is he so upset about the flowers? Seems like an odd time. I think maybe he just doesn't want to be honked at while he's driving. Yeah. I think that's pretty much what it is. Shut.

And don't eat it all at once. Last words he ever says to her. Loves me. Instinctively. Well, maybe not. Infuriatingly. Intensely. In.

In. In? In jubitably. First a boy and then a girl. I love it. He makes her do the shooting. I love it. Well, he's laid up.

She's a hell of a shot. Yeah. For not aiming. Now, he says it's Bluffelt as if he's going to go in there and chase. Yeah. Oh, he would have. I think he is. Had Tracy not taking a bullet to the forehead.

Spoiler. Oh, this killed me. It's so heartbreaking. The thing is, I love the end of this movie, and everybody talks about how this is a nice moment for him. It doesn't work for me, his delivery. I don't know why. No, it doesn't.

He doesn't he at all. Yeah, it could have been amazing. If this was Daniel Craig. Mm. It's all right. Quite all right, really. She's having a rest. Yeah, it's just odd that he slipped into a fantasy.

Getting on soon. There's no hurry, you see. We have all the time in the world. I mean, the holding the hand is very sweet. You just didn't want dialogue here. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Apparently, they did another take before this, and he cried, and they went for the one without the tear,

thinking it was a little too much or something. His wife just was killed It's, it's, this, I mean, this was He does cry a little bit, right? Yeah, he's, you hear it Yeah, but he, I guess he produced a tear and then they end on the bullet Hall. I mean, this, like again,

this blew my mind. Like, you would, this is so anti-James Bond. So that you talk about how going from casino royale to quantum of solace, if you watch an order and you go from this to diamonds forever, it, you get a nosebleed. Yeah. So weird.

Oh, the tonal shift is ridiculous. Yeah, that is a crazy, oh, I feel it right then. Watching it's so sad. Yeah, it's nothing like a Bond movie until a casino or out. They hadn't done anything like it before or after. It's still, it's such like a thing. It's an interesting thing, too, because you spent six movies with this guy. You know, you want them.

You're rooting for him. You want them to be happy. Yeah. And then they just fucking, just brutally, like, of course that's what happens to a spy who gets a wife. Even though you feel like it's Ian Fleming. when he's writing these books going, all right, what haven't I done? Yeah. What haven't I done?

So I have this little nugget I'm going to play here. Just listen to it. This is, I'll tell you about it after. It's a travesty. Where do I begin? The ways in which I have behaved, I'm glad no one was keeping track of me. like a tambourine

driven by the bees I forgot what time it was I wish someone were looking out for me Some of you may think that I regret Some of my doings I'd do it all again If I had the chance just like Lazy's

This is a song by Sondra Lurta Like Laysenby Oh my God George Lazyzby You know I listen I think you did a fine job I disagree I think he did okay

I think that this movie With a better actor Would have been more successful It would have been great It could have taken the James Bond franchise In a very different direction That would have been cooler earlier and you may have never gotten Roger Moore.

You may have missed a lot of the missteps. Because most people probably know this, but they wanted him back. And he backed out. He had his impresario friend that was all anti-establishment that talked him into saying, you know, like, Bond is, nobody's into Bond. It's all about counterculture now.

Yeah. He bailed, he grew a beard, and regrets it to this day. I've seen him speak a couple times at every story he takes back to, I was just getting lied, you know? I was getting lied, you know? I was getting left and right.

He is the biggest cad. All he does is talk about. He's lovable, but he only talks about getting in fights and getting rid. Now, Paul, have you seen the documentary on Netflix, Everything or Nothing? No, I have not seen it. Please watch it. It's amazing. If only for Dalton.

Yeah, it's got Eon production cooperation with it so they can use all the clips they want. They have interviews with Barbara Broccoli, Michael Wilson, Roger Moore, Daniel Craig. All the Bonds of a conference. Brosnan, George Lazenby, and Timothy Dalton, but they're all, it was done very recently, so they all can look back on it, which is where you see George Lazyz be talking about the fact that he fucked up by saying this movie, and you see Pierce Brosnan being hurt by not being asked back. Oh, I got to see. This is like my favorite Netflix doc, Captains, which is very much. Chattano go, yeah. I'll definitely see that.

My question, though, is would they have done the same movie at? as the one, like, would they have gone and done diamonds of forever next? I think they probably would have camped it up a little because this was so not received well that they knew they needed to go back to that grandiose style. Yeah. I think that was going to happen regardless. But, I mean, it also... Do you think that Sean Connery could have pulled off this movie?

That's the question. That's what I was talking about before you got here. I would like to have seen John Connery in this movie. And I just, I don't... I don't know if I... would ever find Sean Connery's James Bond believably falling in love. Yeah.

You know? Even with her, I mean, she's... Diana Rig. Diana Rig is arguably the... I could argue that that's the best. Like, if he met her... Yeah, maybe. But you were also dealing with Connery

at his worst point in the series where he's just phoning it in. Yeah. And that's evidence by Diamonds of Forever. Right, yeah. Well, Diamonds of Forever is a money gig. I mean, it was so like, all right, I'll come back.

Yeah. It would be interesting. God, I wish there were... You could travel for multiple universes. I would like to, yeah, I mean... But, you know, I wonder if that would have sullied the Sean Connery and, like, mythos, like, that, like, he was in this one that didn't really work. Yeah.

Well, you know, I think that's... I think it's an interesting sort of... It's an interesting question of, like, whether or not that's something they should revisit ever. What do you mean? Is that Ian Fleming story? If they should ever go back? I think they should.

You know, and do it. do honor majesty's secret service again. I wouldn't be surprised if they do or elements of it. Because I could see Daniel Craig all over that thing. You know what I mean? Yeah. Totally. I just feel like... Yeah. It works. I mean, they've kind of done the...

Casino Reale has those moments of him falling in love being betrayed. And I think we've seen that. Yeah, but at this point, he's never betrayed by her. Right. That's the thing. Yeah. He actually loves her until she dies. Which is why the man is still bringing her flowers 20 years later.

And I don't think if they continued on with Connery, because he had one more in his contract, they let him out. They wouldn't have made this type of movie. I think it was when Connery left that the producers went, okay, Peter Hunt, what do you want to do? And he's like, let's go all the way. If we're not going to do Connery, let's go do this new thing. And I think they went, let's take a risk. So it would have probably been more in the vein of you only live twice. And there was anybody out there who hasn't seen this one just by virtue of like maybe they just never bothered.

Yeah. You have to see it. You have to watch this. It's very good. there are elements to it that I think could have been improved and a lot of it in editing I mean editing like I think would have made would have taken I don't know I think that would interesting to do a fan edit of yeah oh for sure like I think that who did that like didn't someone do a thing of that like uh did it's like Seth Green do one of like the first two Star Wars movies

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah it yeah it it to me I feel like that is what if you just trimmed 20 to 30 minutes off of it I think you would be in a better zone I just think it's like that's the thing I got this time I remember moments from it but there's so few involved But I think partially

I think partially the I found the time The length of this movie I think I found it helpful in the thought of Okay James Bond can fall in love Over the course of this

Same thing with Casino Royale It needs that long break But she's gone For such a long time Yeah That story kind of takes a back seat And that's why I feel like this movie is a little half-baked. And as much as I like it, and I've re-watching it, I've formed this theory.

And it's like the plot is, the Blofeld plot is half-baked because you get to it so late. And then the Love Story takes a back sleep while you're getting the Blot-Feld plot. And as a result, you're kind of getting, like, three-quarters of each. Like, it's like that blowfell plot is not really all that interesting. It's more, you know, there's, and then the love story kind of comes and go. it's you know by like those scenes yeah i don't know well guys i think we really we really broke into it beat this one to the ground this was a good one to just discuss straightforwardly because i think we all liked it usually we have a lot more to pick apart in a campy way yeah but this one you can't really

do that it doesn't i think it well i mean it's getting respect at this point but i think it just never got the respect it deserved yeah now it's a lot of people's favorite yeah it's a it's really good movie i mean it is very good it's fun to watch and it's uh and i still haven't read stephen sotaberg's open love letter to this movie. Oh, really? It's pretty much what you'd think. Yeah. Oh, really?

Yeah, it's pretty good. So next up, Golden Night. No. Tomorrow Never Does. With Jordan Morris, I believe. Well, that's good. Good luck. Enjoy yourselves.

I can't wait. That's going to be a much different tone. Yeah. I don't have a lot of love for that movie. But I haven't, this is, Tomorrow Never Dies is the Bond movie I've seen the least. It's the only one I never saw in the theater when, since I started going to see him. Yeah. What made you stop?

I liked it well enough, but I just couldn't buy Brosnan at the point, and I just went, nah, these are being done better elsewhere. Brosnan goes down quick. I liked him, Gold 9, and then it's like... I liked Tomorrow Never Does, and I'll say it again. I will, I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Wait, that's on where the motorcycle chasing that's in China with it. I kind of like that one, too, and I thought, I haven't watched...

This is our biggest polarized film, right? Yeah, this is the one where we disagree the most on, and I think I will, I would argue that this is actually Brosnan's best. Because if you take, if you take Fiercebroseon, And you look at Pierce Brousden as he was James Bond from 1995 to 2004. Right? 2002 maybe? Yeah.

So if you look at that, if you look at that chunk of time and you go, for you in your mind, what kind of a movie came out and was big between 1995 and 2002? And Tomorrow Never Dies is that perfect movie. Is it really? That epitomizes 90s action movies. I agree with this. Yeah, that epitomizes the amount of violence, the amount of sex and everything that was in it, and just the grandeur of some of the set pieces, the ridiculousness of a stealth boat, that motorcycle chase.

They were very big on like, let's try and do something like John Wu, because John Wu was huge at that point. This is why I hate when Bond movies try to be other movies. They're at their worst, except for Living Letta. Well, you could argue that Casino Royale had elements of born. Yeah, I agree. And, you know, I feel like they're always trying to do that. Like, I think the interesting, the reason why it's existed for so long is because it can evolve and it can. Yeah, it's malleable.

It's a malleable thing. I think quantum of solace more than anyone took after that born thing because they went for that shaky cam, and that's my least favorite thing about those movies. Well, quantum of solace, in my opinion, this is what I think, and I will watch them back to back. But I think the issue with quantum of solace was, it came down to one thing, the writer's strike. Yeah, yeah. So they were forced. to make this movie under-equipped in every way.

I feel like it needed a little bit more time to bake and I think that they were... And I think everyone on set was trying their hardest. And, you know, when you're doing a movie like Star Trek, that first one, J.J. Abrams on set is going to be able to write and direct a good movie.

And I still, from what I understand, JJ Abrams, I think, suffered a little bit from that writer's sake. But I feel like that director of Quantum of Sons is not going to be able to get in there and massage it the way that it net it. Yeah, but I will say this, it looks great. Yeah, and it looks, that's, and I think, but like, but when it only, when you don't have a writer there to be able to do the other part of it, it's, it's tough.

And he didn't have, he wanted something like twice the editing time and he didn't get it, too. So I would love to see what he would have done with that, even editing-wise with a director's cast. Yeah, I feel like that, that movie, it's, it's disappointing because it just came off of such a, you know, I think the cool thing about the Bond movies is that they are stand-alone, but there are a cool element. I kind of circle through them all. And that one made a very cool choice. It felt like, oh, it can continue rightly. Like it picks up a minute after. Yeah, that car chase, forget about it.

Go home and take a nap. And call me when you're arrested. Are you kidding me? That car chase is amazing. That's what I'm saying. Oh, good. I thought you're telling me to take a nap through that car chase. No, I'm saying go take a nap because you're so tired.

You need to be well-rested. Yeah, you need to watch it. All right. James Bonning will return in tomorrow. Tomorrow never does. Paul, thank you for joining us. Thank you for having you. you'd like to plug really quickly?

Nope. Well, you have the shows coming up because this comes out Thursday next week. Oh, does, all right. Well, then, all right, then I'll plug away, buddy. Well, then here we go. We have a live show at Largo in Los Angeles on December 13th, and you can catch

the NTSF SDSUV Christmas special. Brand new show, December 12th, takes place kind of an homage to die hard with Tom Lennon as the bad guy. Oh, my God, I can't wait. So that will be really fun. December 12, 12, 15. Check out NTSF, S&F, SEDE.

Fantastic. Thank you, Paul. Thank you. Bye-bye. Now leaving, nerdist.com. Hey, this is Arnie Necamp from the Improft Fantasy podcast. Hello from the Magic Tavern. I fell through a dimensional portal behind a Burger King in Chicago into the magical land of food.

And I started a podcast. Season three has just begun with a brand new adventure to defeat the Dark Lord. If you're a new listener or you've fallen behind season three is a great jumping on point. And we've got great guests. like Justin McElroy. I sound like a fancy college professor. Fake Nats. Rachel Bloom.

You all see my collection of men, corpses, and one woman. Felicia Day and Colton Dunn. You've seen me have intercourse with a variety of species. It's a bummer. Andy Daly. You have the members of Genesis listed, but Phil Collins has crossed out and then circled it crossed out again. Yes, I have killed Phil Collins twice.

Thomas Middletch. Jesus, I mean, Jazzos. of the eighth circle. And that's just the beginning. Season 3 of A Loaf from the Magic Tavern is out now. Listen in Stitcher, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.