James Bonding - The Spy Who Loved Me with Dana Gould

Episode Date: March 15, 2023

The Matts are joined by the hilarious Dana Gould to talk about The Spy Who Loved Me! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Now entering nerdist.com. Very smart. Matt and. Matt and. Mad and. Mad and Jiponding Podcast. Myra. Gourley.

Gourley. Let's get a little more volume on that, Erthal. It's the Jins Bonding Podcast. It's the Jens Bonding Podcast. It's the Jens Bonding Podcast. It's a Jens Bonding podcast. It's the Jens Bonding Podcast with Matthews Myra and Gourley. Matthews Gourley and Myrley.

RAH Podcast of James Bond Silky Spoonie and My Rop podcast of James Bond James Fong

Big Podcast James Bond, Big Podcasts James Bond, Pink Podcasts, James Bond, King Podcasts, James Bond, New Podcast, Man End, Man, and, James Bond and Podcast

It just occurred to me that that wonderful theme song by Paul and Storm has four lyrics. four James Bonding total yeah James Bonding

now a podcast Matt and Gorley Myra one two six six words that's economy that is

that is brilliant uh welcome back to James Bonding everybody we are we've returned from the ashes much like Bond himself

reborn yeah I don't know if we're reborn I am oh great I'm born again Gourley's reborn and joining us for this

wonderful episode is Mr. Dana Gould hi Dana now talks like this all the time. It's been a weird thing. It's my new thing. Dana, thank you for being on the podcast. Oh, my God, my pleasure.

This is a podcast I listen to. Oh, well, that's very sweet of you to say. So, as we like to, we start with everybody, we talk about their sort of personal James Bond experiences in life, sort of when you found the character. And what was the first James Bond movie you saw? Oh, God. That's George Burns.

No, let me finish. He was going to say, you devil. It must have, oh, finish. Was John Denver in that one, too? If he wasn't, if he wasn't, that explains why I didn't see it. It must have been Goldfinger. I saw all of them on ABC Sunday night at the movies. I, you know, I grew up in the 70s, and that's when they were on.

And it was one of the reasons I have such a deep affection for them is that, It was one, James Bond movies and Clint Eastwood movies, the two things where everyone in my family would shut up and watch the television. I had four older brothers, still do, and one younger sister. So it was a big family, big house, and there was very few things that would shut everybody up. A Bond movie would do it. A Clint Eastwood movie would do it. The Three Stooges did it.

I have special places in my heart for all three of those things. I do for all three of those things as well. You'll give me 38. Stooges Marathon every new year. Oh, yeah. Channel 38. Why you keep showing Curly Joe? Look, we have a whole pack.

I'll settle for a shamp, but don't give me Curly Joe. We have to, we have the whole package. That was like, I mean, I got disproportionately bummed out when the Curly Joe Besser ones would come on where it just. Well, there was a Mike Donovan, who's a really funny comedian in Boston at this great moment about like, when you're watching the Three Stooges, there's this weird moment where you know. You know, you and 20,000 other people in the state at the same time going, oh, shit, it's Joe. That poor guy. Poor guy.

He's, he was, I don't even, he was fine. He did what he did. He was living in the shadow. Yeah, well, everyone was. I actually, I actually prefer Shemp to Curly. Do you? That was like the intellectuals. That was like the intellectual, Stoger.

You probably love Lazyz and Bate, too, right? He's the Shemp. He's the Shemp of Bond. And I like him. too and i like shamp too but i'm a i like barry sullivan more than uh no barry uh barry sullivan is gregg brady no way barry williams no no barry solvin was the first james bond he played jimmy bond and casino oh barry nelson barry nelson okay my bad no but please edit that's why i look smart this is not the dana gullpower we do not edit this this much would have been five hours

of my show if you're not listening to Dana's podcast I cannot recommend it enough it is the most well-produced podcast I've ever listened to in my life I'm excited to hear some more than you yeah no you have to listen to the podcast it's uh because someone

has to try it's like no it's literally like when I listen to it I go what the fuck we aren't even trying on artists I didn't I'm not doing what the what the form dictates

I'm just doing what I want to do because I don't get... I'm doing it for free. I'm not making any money on it. The money I make goes to pay the people that work on it. So it makes sense that you put more time into it. But it's at least like I want... This is what I want to do.

You can pull down a past episode to listen to it and it's a nice quality to it. And what the form dictates is ridiculous because it's podcasts. Like there should be no form set yet, you know? Well, I feel like next season on Nerdist, we're going to have to try and solve a murder. I just...

wanted to. I just did the show the way, like, I would listen to this podcast, is basically what I do. I'd listen to this one. And it's fantastic. If you haven't listened to it, everybody out there. I haven't, but I certainly will. That sounds great. Please download it. I'm excited to hear when anyone's doing something different than, so this is three guys at a mic. Oh, so in terms of the, of my personal bond story, that was what you're talking about. I think growing up, my favorite Bond movie is Thunderball. That's right. Now, we were made aware of this. you came on and we had a rough time ourselves with Thunderball so excited to hear you. I don't think it is the best Bond movie by fault. Yeah, my favorites are some of the worst ones, not to call it the worst. But it's not terrible.

How often do you see it? How often do you watch a Thunderball? I probably watch it once a year. Wow. And like I can never see there's a couple of things. I can never be in, like, every time we go to a hotel for vacation and you're in one of those big pools that has like walkways and you go under the bridge and people are walking over you. Every single time I swim under a bridge, I go.

Great score by John Barry. I could probably pull that score up. But what's amazing also is that was the one that I remember watching as a kid. And it's funny how when you're a kid, like especially like we were kind of poor, the things that stick with you. Like when he's on the island, the first time he infiltrates the island and you see the shark pool. Like the fact that the guy had a private island, it wasn't the thing that threw us. It was like, God, he's got an in-ground pool. That's true.

That was the thing that really weirded this out. Look at his pool. With a shark section. Yeah. Like when we saw the godfather was like, they just went out to a restaurant. It wasn't even somebody's birthday. They just went out to eat. Not that he shot him in the face.

They just decided to go to a restaurant and went. That was the thing that really threw us. That's funny because, I mean, I grew up watching Bontu, but it wasn't heavily escapist for me. It was just the action adventure. We're wearing the same glasses, dude, by the way. It was just really strange. Did you get yours at... Warby Parker, guys?

Did you go? No. I got my old focals in Pasadena. Oh, I've been looking there because I want to get a new pair. I got these someplace on Hollywood. I am wearing the glasses. Yours are pretending to be. I used to have those glasses.

The Rayban Clubmasters. There you go. Brown robin glass. Those are the Malcolm X glasses. Yes. You will read the newspaper by any means necessary. Well, guys, I'm consistent in my thoughts on Plymouth Rock. What would these be?

I don't know. Who wears these? No, 1962 science teacher glasses. Or NASA. Yeah, exactly. Mission control glasses. Yeah, exactly. Kind of square.

But you know what Huey Lewis says, it's hip to be square. That's why I'm wearing these. It's also hip to quote Huey Lewis. I'm also wearing a white t-shirt, which I never wear in public. But I wore a sweater. I also thought it was interesting that you rolled cigarettes up in your sleeve. I wore a sweater out just because it was late November, and I thought, I'm just going to wear a sweater anyway. In the minute I was like, fuck, I forgot.

I live on the sun. I've been out in New England for 30 years, and I'm just like, God damn, and I need to wear a fucking sweater. Oh, my sweater collection is on point and unnecessarily so. Yeah. I will sweater weather into existence, and it backfires every time. Yeah. We took our kids at the Global Warming Museum and showed them the sweater. they had on display.

That was the thing we used to have to wear. Can you believe that? When temperatures dipped below 69. All right, kids, zip your web suits up. We're going outside. It's really true. Zip up your dune-like cooling suits. So you saw, what I found fast today was that you saw the spy who loved me in a movie

theater above a movie theater that was playing Star Wars. Yes. What? It was a movie theater I worked at later in my life. in 19th summer of 1977 I was I was in seventh I was 13 years old

and 12 years old and that was the summer that Star Wars came out and the movie theater in my hometown was they had a theater downstairs and they had a theater upstairs it was they converted the balcony

of an old musical into a smaller second theater and all summer long 1977 in Milford Massachusetts Star Wars was downstairs in the big theater. Spy Who Love Me was upstairs in the smaller theater. That's a magic theater.

That is a wonderful. And I would, and I would, and I, holy shit. I went to go see the Spy Who Love Me like three times, and I went, I'm going to go see Star Wars again. And I would just run into see Star Wars again. And then finally, my friends and I went to see Spy Who Love Me, because we heard that you could see Barbara Box boob and I was like,

all right, we've got to go. There's no Tint Star Wars. You do, you do get a good, good, good, good, Look at the... Because it's a great thing. It's like, you can shower in my quarters. I'll be in there. Also in the opening titles on Blu-ray, you see a lot more you used to see.

Oh, I never realized that. Yeah, I never realized that. They're dotting the eyes on the credits half the times with them. Oh, that's interesting. This has the fantastic appearance of the just full-on, full-frontal nudity on the things that are hanging up in the submarine when they go into the mess hall. Did you notice that when you were watching it? Oh, yeah, that's right.

The centerfolds? Yeah. This movie has, I'm willing to say right now, more paneling than any other change button movies. Yes, that's true. That's true. It is a festival of paneling. Yeah, it was canned out of us. And tan suits.

Yeah. Tans suits and tan shirts. The tan suit with the lapels. It is the, it is the most, well, maybe, maybe the Man with the Golden Gun. The ugliest clothing bond movie is really just despicable. His tie looks as though it's a napkin he tied on. It's a mighty. Brady tie.

It's so big. Enormous. Length, width. And this movie also has the most catatonic women. They all seem drunk or something. Yeah, Barbara Bach is awful. I hadn't seen it a long time. A lot of people like her.

She's not one of my favorite barn. That's Mrs. Starkey right there. Yeah, that's right. You remember a caveman? I'm being shot. Guys, that was a gunshot. I'm sorry. I'm being shot that, James.

Bring it out. The worst. This is a pretty free-realing discussion. Yeah, please. Mariam Dabo from the Living Daleks. From the Living Daleks. The Living Daleks. For the Living Daleks, I would describe her performance as execrable.

Second only to the joyless dirge of Timothy Dalton's performance in that movie. A U-2 album of a performance. Oh, the Living Daylights? We just did that episode. Where he helps Osama bin Laden. Yeah, where he helps El-Otaheda. He helps Osama bin Laden, basically. Yeah.

That's essentially what he's doing. He hopes al-Qaeda at the end, which is hilarious. And it's like the, because Rambo 3, I believe, is him also helping. Yeah. Al-Qaeda. We really had a, we had a different outlook on them, then. Well, sure we did. Some of us haven't changed.

But let's, so let's jump into The Spy Who Love Me here. This is Roger Moore's third outing is James Bond. Yeah. 10th film overall. Yeah. Right. Okay, everyone's excited. This is the summer of Star Wars.

This is the previous summer Jaws had come out, correct? No, 75. I'll put in a little historical context. Please. I'm old. I'm old. I'm like a friendly tree that comes by. Please, wisdom tree. Tell us.

Live and let die come out. I remember my mother telling me about living let die because she saw Roger Moore talking about it on the tonight show. I would have been nine. Oh, I would watch the shit out of that. And he was, he was, they have a new James Bond and he has a, and he was chasing people in boats. And I remember her telling me about Living Let Die. I didn't go see Live and Let Die. The Man of the Golden Gun came out a year later, I believe.

Yeah, 74. And it was horrible. Yeah. And it was literally like a TV movie. Live and Let Die was basically a black exploitation movie with James Bond in it. In the same way, The Omega Man is a black exploitation movie with zombies in it. It was like, 1973, this is who's going to the movies. Get him in there.

and live and let die I actually enjoy I do too I have a I have an affection for a live and let die in the same way that I have an affection

for a lot of Ringo stars singles because they're all of the same time it's a nine 10 year old kid you know that's what was in the ether the hustle

I remember so you're just listening to photograph on vinyl listening to photial the no no I think it was the no no song was the big one. And The Hustle was used.

That was 1975. But long story longer. Not the Hustle, the Hustle. The song, the Hustle was 1975. The Disco song. Yes. Do the Hustle. I thought you meant like Ringo Starr had a song called The Hustra.

No, no. I was just talking about popular song. That song when it came out, that and Benny and the Jets were omnipresent. Oh, yeah. I was 11. I was 11. So after Remember the Golden Gun, people thought, like,

this might be it. He's kind of done. It didn't do that well. Yeah, it didn't do that well. Yeah, it didn't do well. It was not. It was drobbed. It looked like a TV movie.

And it really does center on one thing, which is James Bond shooting someone else who wants to shoot him. And it's sort of like license to kill. I was just going to say it. It's like a TV movie. And that one tanked, too. Yeah, I saw that one. I saw that one when it came out. And it was like seeing the Phantom Menace.

I want to like it. I'm supposed to be liking it. But it's lit horribly. It's lit really cheesy. It's just there's nothing good about it. Yeah. Nothing good about it. Living Day Lights is also.

I mean, it also suffers from Aha. Yeah. It suffers late 80sitis. Yeah, there was a lot going on with those two particular James Bond movies were sort of reactionary movies. Lift your hopes up way too high. Living's in the way we die. What does that even mean?

Comes the murder. I do a great restaurant in Karachi. Horrid. Oh, that's right. He does know a restaurant. grouching and they ride out on a horse Corey he knows a few. James. There's one thing I remember

seeing it in the movie and there's one thing when they're in like the tent she goes James and she has her hand on her crotch and the guy saw with this comedian named John Ross went my pussy eaches and that was like the rest of the movie we were just laughing at that my pussy eaches

eaches that's great but so then with but when the spy I love I remember seeing the commercials for the spy who love me I'm weird it's it it's the big guess it's the best it's bond and beyond that was the commercial and it looked like a tagline look a space movie james bond and it like the big submarine thing and explosions like oh it's pretty good and it was a huge hit yeah marred really and you know what positively it's it's a scene by scene

remake of you only live twice that's what my problem with it right right which and they were just like same plot same director same director yeah and they're like what are we going to do let they were just like let's go with something that works. We know this works. Let's do that. Roger Moore is great. Yep. If you want Roger Moore, you're getting him

great. You know, like, this is what he does. He doesn't pretend he's anything other than he is. It's pretty terrific. Fucking JW Culpepper or whatever that Dick Watt's name is not in a movie. And then I think the worst thing about it

outside of, you know, it's all the things that make it of its time. Yeah. Ridiculous close. The worse than AIDS soundtrack by Marvin Hamlin.

It is. We're in agreement there. It is. Matt and I were just talking about it. He also ruins for your eyes only, which is another eyes. It's Bill Conti. Same shit, though.

But what I mean is that disco-y, I agree. Because the Barry scores are so timeless and they're trying to pin it down to this disco bullshit. Yeah. It does not work. It's hard.

It's hard. It's hard. It's hard. It's hard. It's hard. It's hard. It's hard. It's the worst score.

Yeah. And then the lame and then but it doesn't it's not even thematically consistent it doesn't even stay a shitty disco score at least for your eyes only stays a shitty disco store that by the way I was for your eyes only I was an usher in the movie theater that

summer so I saw that movie more times than I can count and that summer was for your eyes only downstairs and Superman 2 upstairs oh so whenever I hear but whenever I hear like for your eyes only I gotta open the doors and this is my

tan tan tan shit I gotta go upstairs. They were open the doors. Did they time them so they were getting out at different times? Yeah,

they staggered them a little bit and I lived on popcorn and Sprite that summer. It was actually a really good summer. I can't wait to see. I was an usher at the movie theater

and I saw all so many great movies for free. I would watch. By that time, there was five cinemas and a drive-in in my hometown,

all the same company. And so it was 81 and 82. I just saw everything for free. And they were great years. They were great years. Yeah, those are good years. That was your magical summer.

Firefox. I didn't pay for it. Didn't pay for it. Didn't pay for it. Firefox, Porky's did not pay. That somehow seems like a Brody's statement's bit. First Monday in October, so fine with Ryan O'Neill, I did not pay for it. First Monday in October with Walter Mathiwan, a young Denzel Washington. No, that was carbon copy. Carbon copy with Walter Mathieu.

Oh, yeah. And he was a kid. His first movie? His first movie is a kid. His first movie is a kid? Wow. Let's touch a little bit on this score. I'm going to play very quickly.

I'm going to play very quickly. I'm going to play a little bit of when the score kicks in. This is when James is informed that he has to get headquarters. M has sent him a ticker tape on his Seiko watch. He sent him a sticky label. You sent him a punch label, essentially, which I like to imagine James having to go into headquarters and be like, I need a refill. I'm out of, you sent me the one message that fit in here. So let's hear it.

What happened? Where are you going? Sorry, darling, something came up. So, what came up is there's a bunch of guys on skis approaching. But James, I need you. So does England. So you're like, okay, there's like some strings happening, a little brass action. So this might get a little okay. We're going to have a nice score to this.

He has just left. He has just left. Over and out. Message received. We are waiting. Over and out. There it is. Officially titled James Bond 78.

This title? Yeah. That makes me a sense. I used to have a video game, a spy who loved me video game for Commodore 64. Sure. Great system. And it was like Yars Revenge. You didn't know what the graphics indicated.

So there was at some point that was that Stromberg's layer in the ocean was represented, but it looked nothing like it. And it played a sort of similar image. It's just so grim. What I love is that James also fires a missile at this guy, essentially, out of his ski pole, which he obviously doesn't need.

That guy he kills is not intended to be the same guy she was in bed with, right? She was just in bed with another man. No, that's the same guy. That's the same guy. I couldn't put that together. Now, that guy was contracted to be Bond, and when Connery came back...

Oh, who was this? Oh. I forget his name, but the guy that was the Russian spy in the beginning of Spree? Oh, I didn't know that. So he was contracted to be Bond. They had done the deal, and then at the last minute, Connery came back. I thought it was John Gavin was contracted to be bombed.

He was. Is that not him? Oh, is that John Gavin? That is John Gavin. You're right. It is John Gavin, and I think that may be him. But, like, it is, the way they shoot it, too, you're like, you. That's a very, but that's a very clever twist.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. They do the reverse. God, you can't have that back nowadays. Yeah, no, not at all. I think, isn't that John Gavin? Let me see. No.

If only there was some, if only there was some, if only there was some. If only there was a way to find out. He sounds. When can we meet again? As soon as my mission is accomplished. He looks like a wookie. I mean, that would be amazing to see this movie if there was no advertising, and you didn't know Roger Moore was.

James Bond. IMDB, this is to see that's John Gavin. I don't think it is. Okay, I could be wrong. Because John Gavin is in Psycho. It's not. Let's talk about that. Agent Triple X.

Agent Triple X. But I think that. guy was up for bond at some point. You know what? They do those, well, they do that at the living daylights, too. They have that nice mislead at the beginning. Oh, yeah, yeah. Before you see Timothy Dalton. Mr. Hatt, Mr.

Mr. Self-aware. So let's talk about the fact. Okay, so we'll set up the plot a little bit for everybody listening who might not know it or whatever. It opens on a British submarine. They're having a good time. All of a sudden, everything goes haywire. And then the submarine essentially goes missing. You've seen there's a call to the Kremlin. It's the water version.

Yeah. Think of the space parts and put it under water. There you are. But let's now, let's dive into the opening sequence of James Bond skiing off of a cliff and then opening up a parachute with the Union Jack on it. And yeah, because like all spies, when he's skiing, he's in a day glow orange unitarred and his parachute is the flag of his country. But is he, is he, now here's my question, though.

Is James on a mission, or is he? James just out having a vacation? I think he finished a mission and he's doing the post-mortem with the woman. I think he put on his vacation suit. I think that's his yellow vacation suit. And what's over here? Roger Moore's, Roger Moore,

and there he goes, really? Are you sure I shouldn't wear something a little less, you know, fancy? Famously, this stunt, the guy was paid $30,000 to do this to ski off of a cliff. Yeah, paid $30,000 to ski off a cliff and open up a shoot.

And he would have done that anyway. And they nailed it. And then you get to hear what I think is the, if not the best, one of the best James Bond theme songs of all time. The theme song is great. Before you start that. Oh, sure. Really quickly, should we talk about, is this the best James Bond cold open there is because of that stunt? I mean, it's certainly up there.

It's a very, it's a very impressive stunt. But I mean, you know. What cold opens would you put ahead of this? Well, Moon Raker, the stunt is where they're flying. It's more impressive, yeah. But, I mean, just for impact, this one was the one everybody talked about. Yeah, but let's... There's that, too, but then also if you go later, like, the golden eye cold open with him.

That's a good one. Jumping out of... Jumping a motorcycle and then flying into a plane. And then exceeding terminal velocity because he has to. Well, I never thought of that. Oh, what does he do? You guys didn't know that when you lay flat... You can rule yourself to be faster.

Oh my God. I love it. But this is, I mean, this is like, famously this, the screening of this in England. You know, I might alienate everyone. I really like the skyfall opening. Oh, sure. The skyfall opening is great. Although, they would have stopped that train.

Sure. Oh, there's a lot of problems. There's passengers on that train. Why was there a chain on top of the roof? There's a lot. But I like Casino Royale, I think, is an amazing. That's a great goal. Oh, sure.

That is. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's. I mean, but for sheer, like, Thundercrack and James Bond cocaine opening. Oh, that's the good. This is a good one, you know. They pick their head up off a pile, and they were like, I got it.

Union Jack, parachute. And then you hear the classic John Barry theme. And then some hands come up. Marvin Hamlisch plays the piano. It's not what you expect. I mean, it's basically like a ragtime ball. Our torch song is Oh, that's good.

Mrs. James Taylor. Yeah. Makes me feel sad. Now, guys, I have this. This is a HD copy of this movie. So if you want to see some nips. Okay. You'll see some here.

Oh, yeah. It's not, even when, like, well, I love this, by the way. He's just betting everyone he comes to contact. This is This movie does take place on a planet where When people meet, they automatically fuck Yeah If they've even met yet

If they fuck by me Are you have any messages? No I love it. He's like, no, no, no. Put the gun away. Let's fuck. Here we go. Look at it, I mean, that's just That's what's what you call a nude woman.

Yeah, yeah. And it's great. Yeah. I love the song. It's a great song. So, I feel like when that guy that does the parachute jump, Rick Sylvester, he's got a couple parachuting buddies. And then you got the Willie Bogner guy who does all the skiing stuff that these

were just excuses to go hang out with these 70s party guys, stunt guys, you know, up in the Alps. Bell-bottomed. Yes, yeah. Eternally chapped-lipped-lipped guys. Yeah. Just out in the sun all the time. Do you think... Hanging out with Bill Cosby in the land of nobody talks.

Everyone grab a robe and come on in. In those yellow ski suits. Now here, oh, when he talks to his secretary, the Russian KGB guy or whatever it is, did you notice her name? No. Rubelvic, the Russian counterpart to Moneypenny. First time I caught that. That's kind of funny.

Oh, my God. You know, like, I love those little jokes. So it's really inside and you know they're laughing. So, okay, so we meet Agent Triple X, worst name ever. Yeah, looks like my nephew, by the way. That's like, see, that was on the list right above Secret Agent 10. Wait, hang on. Matt, can I meet your nephew?

I'm telling you, right now, especially when she's wearing this Russian fur cap, she looks just like my nephew. Really? So we see, one of my favorite things to see in James Bond movies is James Bond in a naval, in a naval uniform. Yeah, especially in the end when he's got the turtleneck end. Yeah, well, again, this movie is an ode to epaulets. Anywhere they can get epilets in.

Yeah. This movie also, so what we see here is James being called to, I guess we'll call it Submarine High Council. Yeah, I don't. Sure, sure. The MI6 will relocate its entire operation to any part in the globe if they need to talk to you about something. Later, when they're in. Yeah, when they're in a tomb.

Like, perfectly preserved what would be archaeological relics and they've turned it into an office and they set up Q branch just for the just for the fun

so we have to talk to James Bond for five minutes let's bring all of Q Brands we'd love to get there in there and decipher some of those

glyphs Major Boothroy we're going to be sending your entire staff to Cairo the exploding T-ray knocked the glyphs off the wall

now this the one Rosetta Stone one that could decipher all the others this this scene has the most

the most British people in it and And the new M is hiding out as Admiral. Hillary Bray is in it, too, the guy from Honor Her Majesty Secret Service. This is, like, alumni for Bond. Who is Hillary Bray?

He's the guy that does the genealogy stuff in Honor Majesty Secret Service that Bond disguises himself. Good morning, sir. That's him. Oh. His voice is the most recognized. He's dubbed. And this guy. Yeah, I didn't remember that.

He took over for M. Bernard Lee was ill. So I wonder, and there's no official word on it, but does this Admiral become M? It'd be nice to think. I think that's what happens. His first name is just like Mitch. Mitch Hargreaves. They don't always have to have an M, do they do in my world?

Can we, let me, I'm going to IMD this because the Americans, I think the American submarine commander might be somebody very interesting, but I want to check it. From the end? Yeah. Shane Rimmer? Is that his name? That guy, yeah. He's in, if we're thinking the same guy, he's in a bunch of Bond movies, too. Sitting there when she's showering?

Yeah, yeah, no, that captain. No, but the other guys in, he might be in Superman, too. I can't remember. I'm going to look for it, if it too, I think. So, okay, let's, let me, IMDV. See, now this is where I would cut. This is where you would cut. But we just keep going.

Pick up. No one would hear this. No one would hear us research stuff. on the internet silently. But they know what we're doing. They all know. But it's a, yeah, it's a festival of epaulets. Yeah.

And they, yeah, they really, he's in a ski do or he's in a jet ski. Oh, yeah. He's at the very end. And you know that's like, well, there's this new technology we got to use it. It's called a jet ski. Well, here's the thing. I once went to the French French Polynesia. I went to, what's the island?

not Bali, but the two, it has two names. Bora Bora. I went to Bora Bora. And took a jet ski around Bora Bora. The greatest thing I've ever done in my life, non-sexual.

It was the most, you know, it was just, and just like a commercial and you're on a jet ski. And again, like being under a walkway in a hotel pool, I could not, not go. every time.

I have a Vespa, and I cannot get on it without playing the opening to, Can You see the real me in my head? So we get back from Bora Bora, and it was the greatest vacation we've ever had. And I get back like, oh, my God, I'm so relaxed. I am so happy and relaxed. I'm going to be relaxed for months. Let me write down the date just so I can see when I finally start being relaxed.

Okay, what's today? September 10th, 2001. Okay. I'm going to see how long I stay relaxed. Oh, my gosh. Well, how long? Months and months. I know that was like down on the bottom of the list, but in the positive column of the terrorist going, like, we might ruin some vacations as well.

It's just a... Matt Selman from the Simpsons got diverted to Hawaii and had to spend the day on. in Hawaii for free because nobody was enjoying themselves. Plus he had to feel like pretty safe in Hawaii. Yeah, it can't be that upset now. So Hawaii's not known for its surprise attacks, right guys? It's probably fun. What bad could happen in Hawaii?

What could happen in Hawaii? So, okay, so here's the plot, everybody. Someone has stolen two submarines, a Russian sub and an English sub, and James needs to find out. and on the other side of things, Agent Triple X needs to also find out. Agent Triple X. They've discovered that there's a microfilm out there

that has the, for some reason, the courses of the nuclear submarines on the microfilm. I know that. That exists for some reason. Why isn't it on this? So, and only four people know the courses, the captain, and then, like,

two people at the Admiralty or something like that. So there's no explanation again of why this microfiche exists. So we meet the villain of this story, who was Ernst Starrville Blofeld, aka, basically. Yes, I was right. Oh, no, wait a minute.

Okay, go ahead, I'll think. Stromberg. Yeah. So, my favorite thing that happened, so Stromberg's looking for this, where this microfilm go as well. He needs to know. So now everyone in this movie

is looking for the same McGuffin. And what happens is he wants to root out who of these three people it could have been. So he kills the lady, and then the guys, The guys get on the helicopter and you think they're safe. Yeah.

And just to reiterate to the audience that you think that they're safe, they cut in this scene of them ridiculously shaking hands happily before he blows up the helicopter. We're good then. Pause it. Pause it really quick. Yeah. Did you guys notice his webbed hands? Whoa.

You never noticed that. That's why he doesn't shake hands. That's why he doesn't shake hands. And that's why he wants the world to be flooded. He's part aquatic. What? I know. They never mention it.

It's crazy. Well, there was a tradition in the books that all of Boggs built have some sort of physical. So we have to know in detail about Skaramonga's third nipple, but we don't get to hear about this guy's webbed hands and feet. You see his hand maybe five or six times, and especially at the end, you can see the skin in between the thumb and the first thing. Is it makeup, or do they just find an actor that haven't had webbed, man? This guy was a heartthrob when he was younger. As an actor. And his name is Kurd.

Yeah, Kurd Yergerger. Kirt, yeah. But he's credit as Kurt, right? Well, in here he has with a T, but usually it was with a D. Yeah. Curd. Curd Yergens. Guys, there's curd Juergens all over the place.

We're going to have to move out and tent the house. It's just me. So how bad is your curd Juergens infestation? Okay, this is a piece of Bond trivia. I have to brought it up. I had him wrong. I thought it was, I mean, it might be, and they just made a mistake, but Felix Leiter in Diamonds Are Forever was Norman Burton, who was.

the leader of the hunt in the original Planet of the Apes, that iconic shot of the gorilla on the horse, pulling the net in the cornfield? Same guy. Really? Dana is, of course, the world-renowned expert in Planet of the Yates movies.

That's an iconic shot. Okay. It truly is. Isn't that on the poster? Yeah. Yeah. It's the one that, when I was a kid, I went, what? Uh-huh. There's a planet of this?

I have to have, I have to own everything of that. I need to go work in a movie scene. How big is your... How big is your plan of the apes collection at this point? It's very small. Is it? It's very small. I thought you would have... Did you thin the herd? Yeah, well, after I got... Yeah, sure. I owned Roddy McDowell's

house and had a lawgiver in the backyard and I thought, okay, I've reached the point of maximum... You really did own Ryan McTellell's house? Yeah, my kids... My kids are Maxwell. I still do. Is the lawgiver? statue still there? No, oddly, I just had a bust. I had the courtroom bust, a repro of the

courtroom bust, taken from the original mold on the loggerver, and it was in the backyard, and I asked my daughter, and I moved it. I said, honey, do you want me to leave this here? Because we had it by the bull. Roddy had the Caesar statue from battle and another part of the yard. And I said, honey, do you want me to leave this in? But I went, no. So I put it in my new backyard and I thought, no, I got to get laid someday. I got to get this out of here. And I gave it to another big ape freak friend of mine, Dean Johnson, who's a hilarious writer on real-time with Bill Maher. And he is married to it.

Wow, you're a matchmaker too, Dana. She's in, you know, Caesar's wife and John of the Planet of the Apes. She went in the new one for his sake, right? I heard that, yeah. Wow. And she does not like me because her backyard now has, she doesn't really not like me, but she, we have. We have a fake war because she's like, thank you.

Every time she sees me, you're responsible for the eyesore. Thank you for the giant statue in my backyard. Thank you. Thank you very much. Who has the, doesn't someone have the full statue? It doesn't like Darabond on it? No, Darabond has a copy taken from the mold of my friend Brian Peck, who has used it. I know.

I knew it was in someone's hands. That was a weird thing when I worked for Frank Darbond. I said, like, after I got hired, I said, no, we have a weird thing in common. but I just want to show you guys and if you're at home you put on your DVD and throw it over to the 20 minute mark and you'll see my favorite shot in the entire movie

which is the happily escaped people who don't think they're going to die and one of the escape people his character name must have been Jewie Jumann Look how Cheney this guy looks I think that He's a good villain

In the sense that... He's really low-key. Yeah, in the sense that he's so low-key. He's not... He can't move, really. Like, when he gets... He's basically like a retired villain. I think he's also the most brutally killed by James Bond

of all the villains. Because James Bond shoots him four times. Like, that guy's gonna bleed out of his stomach, no problem. It is unceremonious. I doubt he clots very well anymore. Now with that sea blood. So, everyone's looking for the... But was it...

That was, this was the first, well, I guess it started with Diamonds Are Forever. No, it really did go back to you and live twice. Where the villain's goal was world domination. I always liked it. That's why I love from Russia with love. It's like, well, we've got to get this thing. Right. It's just much more palatable.

I'm with you. Then you go right to Eric Vornoff from Bright of the Monster. And I will contact the world. It does, it does, that is an interesting thing, too. Because the guy does look like Tor Johnson, by the way. Absolutely. Yeah, the guy does look like George. And he was in a bunch of those similar movies, too.

The, what's his name in this? But next to Jaws, he's really the Andrew Ridgley to the George Michael of Jaws. We should, yeah, we should mention. He's the Garfuckle of Hedgman. He's absolutely the R. Garfunkle of Hedgman duos. He, uh, this is our, this is Richard Kyle. Of course, he passed away, not very long ago. Oh, that's same.

And this is the first appearance of Jaws. Yeah. Who has, in years since, has become, I think, right next to Odd Job is the most iconic Bond henchman. Yeah, sure. But he does, he has nothing about it makes sense. No. He doesn't, all, judging from the film, all he has to do is touch his teeth to you. Yeah.

He doesn't, like, tear your throat out. And you don't bleed. You just die. You just feel over and not. The only thing he actually bites is the shark and the liquorish chain. Oh, well, I mean, biting. biting he does also for no reason in that train sequence bite a piece of wood right but also he in the train sequence when james bond has the open electrical socket yeah he bears his teeth to it

is yeah no close your mouth the whole he's trying to it's the left pull of the electrical charge the broken light bulb also like broken 40 watt bulb there's yeah there is nothing about those teeth that that looks practical. It's an orgasm of impracticality. One, how can he take nourishment? Everything has that medley taste. I know.

Oh, okay, explain this moment. Everything tastes like he's eating it out of a bucket. I don't know if he shows up to... I don't know if you can even chew with it. It looks like mastication is quite difficult. When he uses this woman as a shield, Is it because he feels she's betrayed him or she's sacrificing herself? He's won her over and she throws herself at the bullet.

What is the time right here? 2514. At 2514, you will see a sport jacket with epaulettes. Yeah. And a big old brown button on that epaulet. Really no reason. If there was any reason for the 70s to never be repeated, it's right there. That tie is an ironboard cover.

She is staring at the tie. The tie physically probably could, one of those little ironing boards, you know, for apartments, it could conceivably cover that. The tie was later used in an art installation to cover Central Park. Yeah, so let's delve into the scene a little bit. Anything at all? Well, I had lunch, but I seem to have misde-sert.

This is the depth of... I wish he instead, he had said, Eaton, ain't cheating, right after that. His creepy kiss is at its worst in this film. I guess I could have sex a huge, strange person. I'd hate him to walk in and surprise us. Oh, there is no danger of that? He's going to be some time, then, is he? Now, he's suspicious here, right?

I'm meeting someone. Why does she get so weird about that? I'm sorry, I cannot answer a question. Back to sex. I think you can. So, okay, so she sees the guy. She takes the bullet. What happens there?

I think it's, uh... Look at that time. God. That's right out of Thunderball, too, the breaking. Yeah. And Goldfinger. God, there's a lot of recycled bullshit here. Now, we haven't talked about whether we love this movie or not, but this isn't one of my favorite just because it's, it recycles so many things.

Other than the opening, it's just kind of down the middle. But this was just like, this was like, we need to get this thing back on the tracks. Yeah, and that's just classic bond. That's kind of what I do like about it. I do like how much of the formula. It was the first greatest hits, bitch. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. That's exactly right. I wonder if Sky, the sequel to Skyville, Bond 24, I wonder if that's going to suffer from from Spy Who Love Me, Idis. I think they got one more in them before that happens. You think so? Yeah, although, I mean, if it is blow-fell... I mean, they're really setting themselves up. We've got to talk about this at the end.

Is that the rumor? It's more than a rumor now, I think it's almost pretty... Is Christoph-Waltz going to be... Yeah, he's going to be... Yeah, he's going to be theoretically blow-filled. Oh, that's good. Yeah, because they just bought Spector. They finally got Spector back in the lawsuit.

Yeah. Yeah. Let's talk about it at the end. Well, he's good. Yeah. So, okay. So James Bond throws a woman in front of a bullet as per usual. Yeah.

But she's like, she falls in love with him in that second enough to sacrifice herself. Well, I mean, it's James Bond. No, I'm not arguing. I'm too. I'm just clarifying. Like, they probably were almost slipping on the floor because of how wet it was from her looking into his eyes. But his leathery skin immediately softed up like a shabby. Oh my God, it's Ian Ogilvie.

No. But this has the, this has, if I'm not mistaken, I don't think Roger Moore enjoyed this sequence. Because of the killing. Because of the way he kills this guy. It's more the four-year-eye's only one that he doesn't like. But this is, see, but the VR-I's only scene is awesome. Yeah. It's super-o-thous.

This is kind of ratty. But the VR-I's only scene is great. They kind of do this in quantum, don't they? And what I do love is the scoring of this fight. Very percussed. The fight with Tor Johnson on the roof. First fight and the history of Bond movies. The guest directed by Ed Wood.

It really is horrifying. It's really terrible. God, it's all bad sounds. You're a lobo. Now, this is why his tie is so big. Yeah. If you had a knit tie, he wouldn't have slipped. Where's peckish?

Pyramids! You say, I'll tell you. What a helpful chap. you go not really a not really a pun let me off the roof and I'll tell you

you don't yeah really so the pyramids okay go back go back go back go back keep going forward a little bit to where

to where this starts here keep going keep going oh no here let me you guys oh my god okay

so they go to they go to Cairo and the pyramid situation by the way I would love to sit through that presentation that tourist presentation of the pyramid

it seems pretty cool. My question is, was that made up, or is that a thing that they used to do? I bet it's a thing they used to do. I mean, that's the great thing about the Bond movies, and they do do it in Quantum with the other thing. I'm assuming in the next one they're going to go down to Laguna and do the Pageant of the Masters. But they do find these, like the Jean-Canoo in Thunderball,

they find these cultural events because they're travel logs. Quantum had that, like... Yeah. Wait, what thing? At the very beginning. And they shot it like months before the movie. Oh, right. Oh, really?

Oh, really? Well, it wasn't a bull running thing. It was like a... Oh, you know what? Yeah. Again, great pre-credit secrets. Casino Roel. That chase at the beginning Casino Real is.

Oh, that chase is phenomenal. I thought we're talking about the black and white flashback. I was too, but that parkour thing. Yeah, it's just amazing. It's so good. It's so good. And like, when you watch even the behind the scenes stuff of them shooting it, Daniel Craig's really up on that thing.

Yeah. He is harness thin. he's really guys get balls it's insane and the other thing by the way just a side note

for actors doing their own stunts did you guys see the pictures of tom cruise attached to that plane for the new mission impossible

movie yeah like he was on a carrying on the side of a carrier plane without a harness and the plane

was flying at like 3,000 feet oh no I'm thinking of the last one he did on top of that no this one up it

oh my god what is he doing maybe he is magical I don't know. My manager produced was one of the producers on Live, I Repeat, but the terrible real title that was. Edge of Tomorrow.

And I tell you, he walked by the other, and I going, you know, my manager is as funny and cynical as anybody. He goes, I love that guy. He's amazing. We did a podcast with him. Completely positive. I'm sure it was the most podcast you've ever done. It was insane.

Like, just Jonah and Chris and I were like, oh my God, he's fucking everything you want Tom Cruise to be. Yeah, he is like, yeah, I met him on Tropic Thunder and he was like, okay. Yeah. It's the most handshake I've ever had. You win. You win. You win handshakes. The best was when he was, he was heading over to Kimmel right after the podcast, and he just, I walked him out for some reason, and he just pats me on the back, and he just puts his fucking hand in my shoulder, and he goes, Matt, have a great summer. I'm like, okay, Tom Cruise, I will.

That's fantastic. That's what I do. Now, MacGorley is... That's amazing. And you're like... I will talk to. Have a good camel. Okay, here it is.

Okay. Oh, shit. All right. So, do you know about this scene? This is 2924 when Bond is chasing jaws into the pyramids. And they didn't get this shot. Right. That's a painting, right?

That's a painting of Roger Moore standing by the rock. So they paint this... And then they have Jaws run through. So this is just a still painting. What was the time code? 2924. So 2924, if you have your Blu-ray... Oh, it looks like it.

And I'll press play. It's amazing. Yeah. So that's happening and that wasn't moving. Because they forgot to get a shot, so they just painted it. Wait a minute. Was that in post? Just, like, put them in there?

No, it was... They went back in, like, second unit. Everything's in camera. Oh, my God. That's, as far as I remember, maybe it's an... Yeah, it's an optical. It's an optical. It's an optical.

Oh, it is? Yeah. Oh, okay. No, it's an optical in that they put the mat up, just like they do a mat background. Oh, okay. I couldn't remember how it was done, but I knew it. Yeah, so they need this one shot of him. They need this shot, and they didn't have it, so they painted him.

I want that painting in, like, on the corner of my house. And he's chasing Gabe Kaplan across the camera. He's just trying to get Gabe to stop telling jokes at the end of the episodes. So there's a shit ton of stuff that happens in Cairo. We find out that triple X. More happens in Cairo in this movie than in the past 20 years. Yeah. Yeah.

And Indiana Jones. So he meets, he runs into Triple X. The couple of guards. She hasn't married Ringo yet, so she needs to work. Had she not yet married Ringo? No, they met on the set of Caveman. That's how it happened? Yeah, I believe so.

Made in 1980, directed and written by Carl Gottlieb, who wrote Jaws. Oh, my God. You can probably meet any at the Mulholl and Tennis Club. He was always up there having us out. Head over to the Writers Guild. He usually hangs out there doing something. Great guy. Yeah, very nice guy.

Now, let's hear this quick interaction where they size each other up with information. With the Egyptian Ted Lang. Oh, why do I hear it? Oh, I'm muted the wrong one. Can not stir it. Too shit. Command to James Bond, recruited to the British Secret Service from the Royal Navy.

Licensed to kill. and has done so on numerous occasions. Many lady friends, but married only once. Wife killed... All right, you've made your point. You're sensitive, Mr. Bond. About certain things, yes. Now, if you'll excuse me...

You just ordered drinks. Tragically, I have a previous engagement. Happily enough, so do I. Goodbye, Mr. Bond. Well, let's say au revoir. I have the oddest feeling. We'll be meeting again sometime. Was she looped?

Was she dubbed her voice? No, that's her. It's her voice, but it's A-D-Rd, I think. This place looks like every hotel in Palm Springs right now. She has that very like, please have an oyster. In my country, they're considered an aphrodisi. Oh, really? That guy that they meet up with in the dinner jacket.

The not feckish, the guy that's not fackish. Do you recognize him from Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade? He's, when they go, him right there. Oh, yeah. He looks like Urban Kirchel. Yes, he does. He's the guy that is, when they go to that Brunwald Castle, Andy and his dad, he's the butler.

Oh, is he the guy that says, we have many tapestries. But if you ask you, I'm Mickey Mouse. Achto leave her! And these girls in the background, those are the ones that would be in Playboy. It would be like, the women of the spy who love me. And then you look at it's like, she's in the background of a bar on one scene. But I'd still get that issue. And it was the 70s, so their bushes looked like Lenny Kravitz was tying their shoes.

I had to get that. So this is where we first encountered Jaws is killing this. And it can kill you by touching his teeth to your chin. Yeah, as he does with this guy in a phone booth. He killed that guy in the... It's the way he kills people of soap. He just leads over. It's like a cat.

It's like a cat will nose your neck. He's like a bad lover. Smile. You're terrified. That guy's terrified This also right out of Thunderball That's it He's dead

I guess you wouldn't have to I mean I guess you wouldn't have to open your mouth that much To bite of jugular vein out right But there would be an arcing rope of blood That's true That's true It would be like that scene in Dracula Dead and loving it

where Stephen Weber keeps killing the vampire. It just keeps a python-esque spray of blood when your jugular is seven. I believe there's a very quick music change when they get into the van. Like that turns into like a weirdly... Well, then they do the horrible Lawrence of Arabia homage. Right. It's just like, oh, the movie just becomes a pastiche of injokes. But also when they leave this place and Jaws is attacking him and they're in this van.

And he's just making... Fiddling with the keys, he's doing a bit. Yeah. And he's endangering the mission of, like, nuclear war hangs in the balance. And he's doing a bit with keys. Yeah, and he's trying the other one. And then he's, like, this guy's going to kill them. He's like, lady drivers.

Bar-rah, bra, bra, bra, blah. It's like, yeah, no, this is like... It's like the first arc of the second act in this movie. It just, it's just like a Christmas tree of bad comedy and bizarreness. Now, it's a hard, that's, when you're writing a screenplay, that's a hard leg. The first half of the second act is, that's a hard leg out. Really? Yeah, that's a hard leg up.

Now this, I think this is, this whole chase through the ruins. I guess they're ruins, because they're pretty ruined, right? Ooh. This is back when Bond could get you anywhere in the world. If you want to shoot Bond, you're welcome. Anytime. You can do it here. Look at this.

I mean, these are. I don't think they could pull this off today. I think they can do more than we think. But I don't think so, because like, especially in the Mideast, like, it's just not as Western friendly. Oh, sure. This is a great scene. This is fantastic. It's a shot very well.

Yeah. The whole, but the thing that I don't, she uses it right. The thing that I don't love about this is just the silliness of the way she holds a gun on jaws. It's insane. Oh, that's the worst. And he toes it away. He does the kick him. But she looks at him like I'm not going to look down because I know you'll kick me.

And then he looks down for five minutes. But also, but also, but also James Bond stands there. He couldn't see this coming from eight miles away. If the audience can, certainly the world's greatest spy could see it coming. And then he does nothing. Look at that. That's amazing. That's amazing.

And this is back in the 70s when if your bow tie was not the, the size of your face, you weren't doing it right. It's a sad. It's not a great kick. No. Now, is Jaws supposed to be, he has super strength as well, right? Yeah, obviously, he rips the part of Vann. Well, he does have it, and then he doesn't have it.

Yeah, right. It's kind of inconsistent. And then the Moon Rakerie falls in love of the pixie girl, and he's nice again. Give it to me. God, look at Roger Moore, though. He's a dashing motherfucker. Look at that guy. Just that look on his face.

That guy can wear it tucks. Yeah. So Jaws is smarter than both of them, right? Yeah. No. But he drops the microphone. No, this. No, this.

Do it. What? Hey. Good help, Bond. Thanks. Thanks, buddy. But then I do love he takes the scabbling out with one swing of the bat. And then Bond says something racist.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. He does? Yeah. Say something racist, James. Egyptian builders. There's a lot of reasons. That is a great thing to do.

By the way, it's also, yes, Egyptian builders, the people have built the pyramid that are still there. The only people that have built dwellings that last this one. I remember seeing Dr. No at the Harvard Square Theater, and this is probably in the early 80s, and he goes, quarrel, fetched my shoes, and they have the other thing. And then there's another part of the country

and live in the diamond. I go, this is the man, I share my hairbrush with, and they go, Say, Jill. Hey, Jim, that's a bad outfit. My friend was married to Solitaire. Oh. Yeah.

Wow. She's one of my favorite born girls. I don't know why my voice went to that tone. I don't know. Oh, boy. I know that she has half of a lot of money right now. She also had. She brought some in.

You know. Sure. Dr. Quinn. Medicine woman ran for 25 years. I think it's still on. Yeah. Yeah. We beat gun smoke.

So James very quickly looks at the microfilm with his little tiny, I don't know what you've called it. Yeah. What is that? Nowadays, this would all be on a chip. You know, I do, and that's an interesting point to that we've sort of talked about a little bit on the show, is that I do find that it's harder to write a, a spy movie now because of technology. Yeah, I agree. Because there's so much

that there's so many plot points of all of these older movies that would be tied up very neatly with a cell phone call. And technology was the like the catalyst for everything. But it was the luxury of spies. That was what they dealt in and we didn't have that.

This is a conceit of the movie makers that I think they can kind of let go of. It's like James Bond has to solve every problem. And the new bond, the new configuration Q is a computer genius. and he's uncracked this whole thing but James Bond has to go wait what's that

and he does it in this one too it's a matter he goes the Q goes I don't know it is probably nothing look at this this movie shot pretty well and it was shot by

Renoir's like nephew or grand nephew of the artist but then he started losing his eyesight and for the big submarine hangar scene they secretly bought Stanley Kubrick in

who was shooting the shining and had him help with the lighting. You're kidding, no. Yeah. He said, I'll do it so long as you never say that I did it, basically. Yeah. They revealed it later. Really? He didn't want to be associated with it or something.

Just fucking sour puss. Yeah, real sourpuss. I'll do it, but you can't say that I did it. That's the only thing. If you want me to do it, I'll do it. But I don't want to be associated. You go work on your all natural lighting movie you're never going to make. I'll do it.

I'll need three months just to light it. Yeah, and relighted. And I need to take a break every 20 minutes to humiliate Shelley Duval. And if I get to do that, that I'll help you. How's Papa Buck? Does she need a good dressing down? We're waiting, Shelley. Everyone is waiting for you, and you're not coming out because I don't know.

You know what are going to. Leave the woman alone. Angry bear. This is where they're in the ruins. MI6 has gone ahead. M.I.6 is relocated to the room. James? Is he in?

This is the movie after they had taken over a sunken ship in Hong Kong, right? Boring, money, penny. As a matter of fact, they dropped off. They put track lighting in an ancient ruin. Whoa, what's happening? They installed the elevator doors. They installed elevator doors in this. Why do they have to move the entire office?

Now that musical cue could have been John Barry. And when it goes to disco, like you're saying. Very English. Bernard Lee shows up. I guess he felt better. You probably recognize my opposite number in the KGB. General Gurgle, and I believe you're familiar with Major Amazov. Enough to know which brand of cigarettes she smokes.

Our respective governments have agreed to pool their resources to find out what happened to our submarines. We have entered a new era of Anglo-Soviet Corporation. And as a sign of Russian good faith, I'm prepared to make available to you the microfilm recovered by Agent Triple X. With considerable ease, I might add. Don't bother with it, then. It's useless.

I examined it on the boat. Boom. I assure you it is quite genuine. Except that the vital technical information has been taken out. This was only intended to wet our appetites. Was Moonwrake or Bernard Lee's last movie? Yeah. Yeah.

Maybe Q can make something out of it. And we've also relocated all of Kubrick. Let's talk about QBridge. Let's talk about all the things they're working on right now. They bring projects that aren't relevant to this mission to work on in ancient ruin. We need to have a five-minute conversation with an agent in the field. Let's relocate R&D. I want that ready to an old pyramid.

Oh, my God. So they're working on a magnet, levitating, working on a spray noise sound effect. Yeah. They have the hookah pipe. What is? A mud gun? A mudgun?

That sounds like code for something. They have carpeting that has a knife. Don't go to mudgun.com. I have a horrible feeling you'll see something you don't want to see. Mudgun is after a lemon party. This scene is good. She's right there. Everybody ready?

Right. Now, we're pretty certain that this drawing was drafted in Italy. The size corresponds with the Venetian Octavo, and the typeface is an Italian one. Now, note the slight upward stress on the transversals. Q, what's that mark there? Huh? Yes. Oh, wait a minute.

There's actually a question we can ask you. If somebody had their jugular vein snipped by a steel. Say a guy with steel teeth. Who might be seven feet, eight inches tall. Hi, I'm Matt. Are you a doctor or a surgeon? No, I'm a nurse. Oh, wow.

That would be a lot of blood, right? Yes. See? There, you have it here. It's under a lot of pressure, right? We finally cracked a hole in this movie. We brought in a medical expert to tear apart. Next, we have an archaeologist.

So if you want to... No, you can put these headphones on and hear what we're hearing. You really just be part of the live podcast. Have you ever seen The Spy Who Loved Me? Yes. Are you familiar with James Bond? Yes. Okay.

What is this? This is James Bonding. Okay. This is a podcast. You're on a podcast right now. This is a podcast. This is called James Bonding with Matt and Matt. We are the Mats.

Okay. Now, welcome, welcome to our program now. Janelle. Janelle. I'm sorry. Welcome to our program. We don't have a lot of girls here in the James Bond cave. Janelle is joining us straight from work or something, I'm sure.

You probably seemed like you were somewhere important, and then you came to pick up Dana. Healing the sick. And Dana's running late. You said pick up Dana like, I can't drive. We're going out to a nice meal. Well, you know, six and one half dozen of the other. Way grown-ups do.

Dana recently has had his license taken away. and Janelle is here to help. So right now we're in the middle of discussing the spy who loved me. What time are your dinner reservations? We'll get you out of here. No, we'll be like... We don't have reservations. Oh, you guys are really just gunning for it, huh?

Are we just going to run and gun? Where are you going? Where do you want to go? Well, you want to go to Cat and the Fiddle? Yeah, you have to go. The Fiddle's great. Yeah, you don't got much time. Oh, wait, are they taking...

What's happening? They're shutting it down. Why? What? Because it was nice. Because it was nice. Because people liked it. Things.

I had someone offered. them more money. Yeah. Oh, so it's, so the cat-of-thill itself is up for sale? I don't know. It's going to become something horrible to be determined. TBD. TBD horrible is going right in here.

The neon has already been ordered. Yeah. It's going to be like the, the, the Ott 15 version of the Roxbury is going. So the last vestige we have of those kinds of bars in Hollywood is Tom Bergen's. And Tamo Shanter. Where is more is he going to go now? That's way over, though. Oh, where I live, man. Yeah, it's over by you.

That's in my world. I'm in Hollywood proper, Matt. That's true. So we're discussing the spy who love me. A case, let's catch you up, Janelle. Here's what's happening. Microfilm, metal teeth. A Russian submarine and a British submarine went missing.

Oh, I'm already bored. Okay. And James Bond is on the case to find out what happened. Also, a Soviet spy by the name of Triple X, who happens to be a very attractive woman. Ringo Starr's wife, Barbara Bach. Are they still married? Yes.

God bless him. That's great. I know. We just noticed that. Then we covered that earlier. Okay. Do you have anything to add about the glasses? They're the same.

See if our prescriptions are the same. What if they were? What if they were? Who's the older? Pretty blind. Oh, no. Yours are worse. Oh, you.

You don't even need glasses. Oh, my God. You need two. Triple S? Triple X is her name. It's Vin Diesel before. The least provocative Vin's Bond name.

Exactly, exactly. It's not even, they're not even trying to make a pun. Yeah. They're just saying, she will allow pedicration. In Goldfinger, the woman's name was pussy galore.

Right. So it's kind of. Which you watch with me. Did I? Oh yeah, I did. Maybe. We saw it at the cemetery.

They did it at the Cinespia this year. And it was amazing watching that outdoors in the summer on a cemetery. That movie, People think like, God, Goldfinger is great. That movie's got some crazy cartoon shit in it to you. Oh, of course it does.

I agree. I'd like to lay one line on you. Champagne leader to Champagne One. The all-sexy. The pussy galore's flying circus. Yeah, the all-sexy girl pilots. Oh, a flying circus. Wait, Monty Python.

Do you think they got it from there? Or was flying circus is just a thing that ran out? Flying circus is a thing. No. But that's not dissimilar from the line and you only live twice. They're very sexful. Tiger Tamaka Sex are full

That's not a word So they are They're examining the microfilm right now And this is when you see them One Upping each other As far as who knows what the most When it was photographed Must have been done in a hurry

Can you enlarge it? Hmm, wait a minute Can I do your job for you? Oratory What is that? It's another word for chapels. Looks a bit like a bishop's mitre It is a

Fish. That is the symbol of the Stromberg shipping line. Carl Stromberg? But he's one of the richest men in the world. One of the principal capitalist exploiters of the West, sir. So it's not oratory, it's laboratory. Whatever you want. He has a marine research laboratory on Corsica, I believe. Well done, James. Actually, sir, it is in Sardania.

Boom. That's brilliant. Get a sarcophagus, you too. Two such perceptive talents will enjoy working together in Sardinia. Uh-oh. And that it will help to make the same. This needed a sitcoms, went off. Now, was he the voice of Blofeld from Russia with Love?

I don't think so, but he's in from Russia with love. Yeah, no, he plays the same character. Does she die? She does not die, no. She does not. She makes it to the end. The guy that's the voice of Blofeld is actually the guy that is, I think he's the guy that plays Professor Dent, believe it or not, in Dr. No.

I'd be wrong about that. There's some connection there. I thought you'd show up sooner or later, Dent? I just made a lot of people mad that are listening to this and know that's probably not true. There's your wood paneling, though. But there's plenty of wood paneling in the scene, and James's tie has somehow gotten even bigger. James's tie is the size of a blanket your mother would give you when you go away camping. James's tie actually starts out as a tiny tie and you pour water on it.

They just came from the dining car And the tablecloth got stuck to his neck Brown on Brown Yeah, a lot of brown on brown On Brown. Made in 1976 So the At the same time this filmed

At the same time As Star Wars Not a lot of paneling in Star Wars Is you doing it yet? This is Jaws This is the person that will bite your jugular out But there's never any blood So we just wanted to find out

That wouldn't happen, right? No I bet I could have told you that Yeah but you don't have a degree to back it up That's true Yes, you would die So this You know this

This is now a A train fighting sequence that we have seen before And from Russia with love But done much better And live and let die And live and let die, yes of course But again, no musical score Just some crazy folly work

Yeah Yeah. And James Bond dressed like Mike Brady. Here he is. He bites this for no reason. Hungry. Why is he wet? Oh, he got a bottle of champagne crashed over his shoulder.

It's continuity. What if he broke his jaw on the wood panel? I got to take a drink. The size of Richard Keel's hands. What? Is this about to happen? No. I'll tell you what's about to happen.

James Bond's going to innovate. Also, he'll watch it. Now, why is he jutting his metal teeth towards the thing he doesn't want to touch his metal teeth? Watch you when he gets thrown out the window. He's tiny. Watch. He's huge, huge, huge, huge, tiny. I never know. I'm never noticed. Stuntjaws is we. Huge, huge, huge. Tiny. When they're on that gondolas in Moonraker and he jumps across, it's just a tiny little guy. Charlton Heston's stunt motorcycle driver and the Omega Man is also so grotesquely not Charlton Heston.

It's close to Black A's from Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Paradise. Park. Sorry, not Paradise. Now, this is the introduction of the... The Lotus Esprits. Yes, that guy's hanging out over there in the background, holding a rope. Sure. This is the Lotus of, which I had the Corgi of. Oh, that little toy.

Yeah. The corgi. Corgi, of course, makes all the... They have a DB5. They had all of them. I had a corgi BMW 750 from Tomorrow and Ever Dies. Oh, my God. That had little rockets on the sunroof that shot. And if you could also see Roger Moore's, he seems to be wearing more brown on brown.

And he seems to be wearing, yeah, clogs or OJ dingoes these might have been. But this is the introduction of the second most iconic car in all of James Bond. This is the, this is the, well, it looks like a Delorian from here, but it is a tiny British sports car that they... It's also hideously ugly. Yes. They were in search of a new bond car. The guy from Lotus found this out. He went and grabbed the Lotus' spree from the factory,

painted the Lotus logo all over it, drove it to Eon Productions, and parked it in front. He didn't even say anything? He didn't even say anything. He just parked it in front. Oh, this is why we do this podcast together. There's still moments to share. And they were like, what is this car?

And it's a British car. It's a Lotus. They still make them today. Really? The first Teslas were actually lotuses that were... Holy shit. I don't know if you knew that about Tesla. I didn't know.

That's why Elon Musk ended up, like, falling in love with this. His plan, by the way... He bought this, right? His plan, he bought this car, and his plan is to make it into a car that can also be a submarine. Oh, my God. Because why not? Yeah, why not? It does look like a Delorian.

But it's a... It's an really... It's an ugly car, though. There's no aerodeon. Yeah, it's a 70s... It's the 70s... version of what the future should look like, which is just wrong. It's like the guy, like, it's like this first draft before he got to the Lamborghini Kuntosh.

But let's, uh, let's hear, let's hear the, uh, see, I don't know what happened to the video. Come on, come on. Good morning, Major Boothra. Morning Major. I do like what she calls him Major Boothraud. Isn't it nice? Guys, I don't know what happened, there. I don't think the listeners have a problem.

I don't think the listeners have a problem. I want a two rather special accessories. Q, have I ever let you know? The audio is right through the podcast. Guys, we can't see it. We have to stop the podcast. There she is. Now, this Bond Girl on the helicopter, Carolyn Monroe.

Carol Monroe from Sinbad in the Eye of the Tiger. Forget it. Yeah, she's... Forget it. Remember it, and then forget it. She's quite ridiculous. Shame's Barbara Bach, by the way. Yeah, I agree.

And so does this receptionist... I don't know. Barbara Bach is gorgeous. Best Bond Girl? Carol Bucay from For Your Eyes Only Really? Wow Well I saw her a lot during this In your formative years

My formative years She made a big a best That's how you know you're watching a James Bond movie When this is not the hot girl I find her maybe to the most attractive By the way I find that if you were to remove the ruffles That would be a dress you could wear today That's my fashion input

And she seems to be wearing about a half a can of Breck Hairspray So, okay Now this is helicopter girl And she's clearly dubbed She's got a man's voice Mr. Sterling It is me Natasha from Rocky Bullwaker

Mr. Stromberg sent me to collect you How do you do? This is my wife Who happens to be my assistant You are on holiday here? She is mostly mascara A marine biologist is never on holiday I agree.

She does it for me. I'll offer you a drink before we go. No, thank you. Mr. Stromberg's a very busy man. His time is precious. Now, when I turned, should my head leave frame last? Do you think she's hotter? She looks like the mother on good times.

I think she's hot. When she was in Sinbad in the eye of the tiger, it was just like, oh, or is it a Golden Voyage of Sinbad? I believe she's in Golden Voyages, Sinbad. She's in a lot of Hammer movies. What's that Roger Corman Star Wars knockoff? Not Battle Beyond the Stars, but the one... She's in that one, too. I don't know what it is.

I'll find out. Carol Bouquet. No. Caroline Monroe. Caroline Monroe. We should rename this episode. Let me Google that for you. Caroline Monroe, actress, by who loved me.

Leggy, brunette. Mained pinup. That's her IMDV. Born in Windsor and lived in Rottingdeen. Oh, she's English? Wow. Oh, no, she is English. Maybe they dubbed her because of that.

But a real voice sounds like this. I'm a little bit about. I'm a pretty lady. She was in maniac. Golden Voyages in Bad. Yeah, not a big filmography. No. She's basically starting to do conventions.

She does bond conventions these days. We should go to one of those. Well, I don't know. In 19, she plays a shopkeeper in 2014's Crying Wolf. She's in the movie. She plays Mystic Mary in the movie Cute Little Buggers. Back in the game. Back in the game.

She's in a lot. She's still, she never stopped working. God damn it. She's a hustler. This is the meeting of Bond and the villain. Always a pinnacle moment for movies. This is the scene I was watching yesterday or the Star Crash. Yes, that's what I'm thinking of, where I thought the one goal in life I have is to start

Like a villain's loungeware collection. And this would be the showcase outfit right there. This burgundy. What is he wearing? Caff tan or whatever. I know. I don't know what that necklace is. It's like this man's name is curd.

Curd-yugan. What is his necklace? He's his webbed fingers too. Shark. I think you will find this interesting, Mr. Stirling. An underwater city. Fascinating, isn't it? The only hope for the future of mankind.

Seems like an odd choice. Seems like a lot of obvious drawbacks. The lack of air being the first one. There are easier ways. Houses in the trees. Goodbye, Mr. Stirling. And if we don't meet again, I wish your luck with your research. Well, thank you.

The brief glimpse you've afforded me today will only encourage me to redouble my efforts. Goodbye, Mr. Strong. That was all? They're done? Yeah, pretty much. For now. For now. Who?

Who is shark? Not nearly as good as the meeting of Goldfinger and Bond while they played golf or one of my favorite lines in Thunderball when they're playing ski. Yeah. He goes, good rifle for a woman. Nah. It looks fairly difficult. No, it isn't, is it?

Yeah. Do you know anything about guns, Mr. Bond? No, but I know a few things about women. That may be my favorite thing in that whole movie. I know a few things about women. I wrote this down. I love the performance here when he is just fucking munching on some almonds.

Who is? Oh, yes, yes, that's right. Still looking good. And the woman is made a massive Russian agent. Look at him go. Let him get to shore. What is he eating, almond? You can hear him too.

And then kill him. He's very subtle. Angry, angry, man. I just love it. I have to get to the world's giantist eyegbags meeting. I am the keynote speaker. The giant eyegbags. Now, now what ensues is the chase between the lotus of spree and the motorcycle with only one weapon that is deployed much too soon.

This is the movie with the most vehicles from the mask cartoon in it. Yeah, this is where everything, this is where we find out that the world is constantly being circled by a vehicle. designed to kill you if they're called upon to do it. But what I love about this is you expect like, like, like in Thunderball, the bike has missiles all over it, and it can shoot multiple times, but this thing only shoots its sidecar. It's a torpedo. That was in the commercial, by the way, that was a torpedo.

I remember that. Oh. The track. But just the back of it. No one's heard. BJ and the bear are fine. But not this guy in the dummy that gets. thrown off the cliff here.

Watch the dummy, watch it. Dummy! I love that. All those feathers and he still... It's still in the dummy. His legs are bending all weird. So, you know, in your medical opinion. That guy was a dummy? I think so.

I think so. Now, this is the things I drag you in too. I contribute nothing to this. I don't think I've seen this one. You contribute perspective. When I met you, you had so much dignity. I don't think I've seen this one. I'm sorry, listeners.

No, don't worry about it. That's okay. That's okay. Now, here's what happens. Have you seen any of the Roger More ones? I don't. Who this guy is? I think so.

I recognize him. When you think of James Bond, I know you're a girl, so you don't think of him often. Who is the actor that you saw the most James Bond movies of? Pierce Brosnan or Daniel Craig? Oh, probably half and half. I like Daniel Craig better. Yeah.

Well, the movies are better. We saw Skyfall together. Yeah, we did. So did we. We sure did. We saw my friend Rob Cohen. We saw it was like, my two very good friends, Rob Cohen and Ken Daley. I've known them both for, for,

decades there two of my closest friends we were with them last night the movie finished I turned to

Janelle and that was great I'm easy to please that was fine you know it's James Bond and they're like

that was horrible I liked it I did too when it was broken down it was kind of weird yeah but it's a James Bond movie you're not supposed to break him down

does he get gay in that movie does he get well he hints at doing whatever he needs to do for Yeah, when he's feeling his legs, that's a great scene.

That's a great scene. Oh, that's a really good. And it's all one shot, too. It's a really easy way of saying that, too. Does he get gay? Does he get gay? Very busy. Now, in your medical opinion.

Does he mow up? But this is the very iconic moment. This is when the Lotus shows its true colors for the first time. Barbara box is terrible. But she shouldn't be because she knows. The dock is loaded with boxes. Yeah. Why is she's afraid?

Because as we find out later. She's had the blueprints. I said she's bad. Well, she's just a Russian. So, I mean, you know, that means in the 70s. Did you guys ever watch that cartoon mask? Yeah. That bad one that was very similar to this car.

I love the periscope for no reason. And soon the model of the helicopter that's going to blow up. I love this. A lot of lipstick. A lot of mascara. And this is right out of You'll never live twice. Yeah.

But you can see the size of the model by the side. That's about a four-foot model because you can't, same with the model of the city. You can't miniaturized water droplets. You can always see them. That tanker is like 30 feet long or something like that. It's amazing.

I feel like they're about to do it. Are you about to do it? Not yet. Totally. Did you ever read the novel, Spy Who Love Me? Yeah, the novel The Spy Who Love Me is amazing. It bears no resemblance to the movie at all. It's a very weird one-off bond novel,

written from the point of view of the woman that James Bond rescues. But she's about her losing her virginity. Yeah. Not to Bond. He doesn't enter until like three quarters of the way through or something like that. Yeah, it takes place at a motel in Vermont. Yeah. And literally the, it's James Bond against two mobsters,

and literally the names are like Slugsy and Mugsy. It's like, it's like, it's like, Ian Fleming trying to write from a woman's point of view, and it's like, I put on my slacks that hug my thighs so tightly. That movie, that novel and how telling it is that he hates lesbians and stuff. I think he was just like a closeted lesbian because he's just working through so many issues in that book. Yeah, and Goldfinger, too, he hates lesbians. Oh, he hates them.

It's just a grumpy old British guy. Nobody hates lesbians. They don't bother anybody. He does. It's like Revenge of the Nerds. Football Players didn't hate nerds. NERS didn't rate. You weren't even on their radar.

Nurt! Oh, my God. But let's now, this is the introduction of our favorite recurring character in all of James Bond movies. Yeah, and then we'll wrap it up, and then you and I will talk. Yeah.

Christoph Waltz. Just very quickly, let's... Well, I'd like to be a pun. Oh, you would. Okay. Let's get to that. Drunk guy on the beach drinking an entire bottle of wine.

Where is this beach, though? Sardinia. Yeah. There he is. This is his second of three cameos. That's got to be somebody. His cousin was the American guy that lifted the bottle that said flying sauces over Hollywood to play 90-Muders' case. How did the fish get?

It didn't. It didn't. That's the point. The point is it didn't. But what's amazing is this is what's great about Roger Moore. If you see how he's holding the fish. He knows what he's doing. He's a gifted light comic.

That's right. He does it perfectly. Yeah. Although it's not out of Roger Moore's Bond's character to have pre-put a fish in there thinking, when I come out, won't this be a funny gag? So now, you guys know more about Bond 24 than I did. Yeah. And Matt even knows more about it than I did.

I'm trying to stay spoiler-free. I know John Logan. Yeah, but though I guess... You know John? Yeah. Do you know about how his script has kind of been pushed back a little bit? No, no, I know nothing. They initially said, all right, we're going to get rid of those two writers we usually use.

Purvis and Wade. Just go with John Logan. Then he turned in his script and they're like, hey, would you two come back and kind of brushed us up a little bit? But then they brought this other guy that worked on Skyfall uncredited, and what did he write recently? Oh, man. I don't remember... Wait, didn't he write, didn't he write, uh, Edge of Tomorrow? That may be, that's what I thought, too.

Oh, that's cool. Live there. My manager would know him. Yeah. Yeah. Which is amazing. It's a great movie. It's a great movie.

It really is. It just was marketed terribly. So it's looking more and more. Well, Christoph Waltz is cast, but it's looking more and more like he's Blofeld, and they're going to try to make a ruse out of it. But a lot of the stuff is set, and they're shooting in the Alps, I think, in Switzerland, which excites me because it's been a while since you get, like, the Alps are very bond. Yeah.

That's a great... Well, that's where his parents died. Yeah. And I think that may have something to do with it because there's something about Waltz's character that's masquerading as the son of a ski instructor mentor that mentored both he and Bond or something. And spoilers. You said that late. How does it work? I don't think it's going to make a difference.

No. As long as he's not pretending to be a ski instructor, I'll go. But this is rumored stuff still. I love Christoph Waltz so much, and I so badly wanted him to do his American approximation of an American action. Well, you'll see that in big eyes. Yeah. But his accent and dialect in Django is so great. And in glorious bad as Schultz.

Yeah. And he, if I'm not mistaken, he was kind of done in Germany. and Quentin Tarantino just remembered him from a thing he saw like 20 years ago and just kind of pulled him out of I might be completely wrong but you're absolutely correct

yeah and Tarantino was like he's perfect casting for this I mean because he's got enough of a cat like a classical feel but he'll bring something to do it and he's such a good actor I thought Harvey R. Bardem was great

yeah he was so good and I wonder because the rumor was what's his name Chihuotel the 12 years of slave guy oh Chiroto I'll the name I can't pronounce. Alda Bondegas? Something like that.

Okay. Well, he was being spoken to about the villain for this movie, too, and I don't know if that meant he was going to be blowfilled or what, but I don't know. Well, let's talk about the final... And the weird thing, and again, spoiler. Strange choice. Kathy Griffin is the blonde girl. It is. It is.

Oh, God, I wish. I wish. I wish. I wish. I mean, of course. see it. She's Felix Lider. She would be...

Apparently, he's not coming back. That's a bummer. I liked Joe different. Oh, I liked him. I like the Felix Lider and Thunderball, kind of the goofy stuff guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, I also would like to point out... This is a...

This is a... Look at your transpats. This is the... Oh, look at his package. Oh, yeah. Oh, Jesus Christ. What the hell is going on down there? He's got like a belly button dick that goes all the way down.

Kids at home One hour, 36 minutes and 47 seconds into this movie Pointing right at it You'll just see some By the way, sweet, sweet bulge If anybody like bulk orders Like 1,200 matching jumpsuits,

They're a super villain Get right on it Amazon What are they just subscribing and saving From Amazon? They're just doing a subscribe to that Or they, these are just Stock left over in conquest of the planet

of the age But what I do want to show you guys here and the audience at home the uh there's a there's a British soldier here who gives the worst fake death I've ever seen on camera he sort of uh get shot by bullets

and then shimmies into the water I know I know exactly who you're talking about oh god this is also right out of you on the live here yeah so much and Moonwreck is the same all right guys it's coming up keep your eyes on them there that guy

He literally stops, stops cold, shakes four times, left right, left right, left right, and then like a plank falls into the water. Now, is that what would happen if I got shot? He's committed. So, okay, it's been revealed that the plan is for Strauss, what is his name again? Stromburg. Strasberg, at least Strasberg. Lee Strasberg is going to.

comes in. He's going to have those nuclear missiles launched at New York and Moscow. Moscow. So essentially he's sending the world into a nuclear war. Yeah. So dipping the world into a nuclear war and then he'll live under the sea.

He's the opposite of Ariel. So now what's happening here is there is there is what's left of the submarine crews they're trying to fight the people on the tanker. It's a big battle. It's Red jumpsuits versus blue jumpsuits.

Okay, so it's easy on the eyes. And this is now, you're looking at the lighting, Stanley Kubrick apparently, help that out. And so what ensues here is essentially just a retelling of, you only live twice. Yeah, no kidding. Like a literal retelling of that with a lot of... This is the first use of the 007 stage at Pinewood, by the way. Also, they built it for this. They built it for this, right.

And then Ridley Scott burned it down. Oh, he did? What movie? Legend. Really? Yeah. Oh, look at that. FreeZ frame. Now, pay attention to this. I'm also going to point this out. Getting his epaulets on.

Kids at home, one hour, 37 minutes, and 21 seconds. He looks like he's wearing a Roger Moore mask. What you're going to see is what looks like Scott Thompson in a sailor uniform handing a clip to James Bond. Like, it looks like a guy who's been in the Navy only because he loves the. men and he's been in there for too long and he's 50 years old and he has not been promoted yet he's like a little boy

he's looking a little boy's sailor a little Victorian naval uniform that's awesome I want a screenshot that guy I know it's a little ridiculous how did you see all this I just I just was watching

combing through I need to I need to write something about this So, okay, they're throwing grenades left and right, everything's going crazy. They need to penetrate the control room, and the only way to do that, apparently, James says, let's take the detonator out of a nuclear bomb. Smart. And this guy dies.

Oh, cap'n. So, let me jump ahead a little bit here. We've got a long climax where essentially the same thing is happening for 40 minutes. I remember that guy. Yep, so this is the scene. How's is the impulse conductor circuit, sir? It's magnetic. I mustn't touch it with any part of the detonator.

What happens if you do? I don't go off. Ask him at a different time. Why is T-Bone Burnett having? He looks just like him. Now they're playing operation. Is he not supposed to do that? it's

well it just can't they're making the rules up as they go do you remember in Thunderball that the bomb has handle like eggs sandaled on it isn't that hilarious so they put a 20 second fuse

so they put a 20 second fuse on it James there's still a half hour left oh listen we're zipping right through this I am now Mel Brooks is in the movie Mel Brooks is here he's gonna

the worst musical of all time. Everyone's watching James Bond slowly move towards a wall. It's like he unplug the music. He like unplug the music. That's pretty funny. It was great. It was really, for your eyes only,

it would have been great at that was his last one. I just remember seeing a view to a kill going, God, don't let him do another one. And that guy looks just like Mel Brooks from silent movie. Yeah, absolutely. Just, no, so James Bond, he needs to get away. Another great Ken Adams set? Yeah.

He's the hero. Well, that's probably how they get Kubrick in because he also did strange love. Yeah. God, I love Ken Adam. That is how, actually. Run over the dead bodies. It's right. Oh, they're not laughing.

Many of them were napping. You're too late born. Our submarines already on station. I'm very sympathetic even though I'm part of the horrible plan. I want this big, Can you work at living room? Well, sure. James, we've only got three minutes.

If we can work out the position of those submarines, maybe we can reprogram them. To do what? To destroy each other. We need to put a clock on it. We'll only have three minutes. We only have 45 seconds to find out when those submarines will have three minutes left. Everything is so timed out.

It's like screenwriting one of them. In two minutes, we'll have three minutes to find out. So the missiles are going. We don't know what's happening. We don't know what's happening. Did part of you think they were going to do? just hit each other and blow up on the screen. This is a very Dr. Strange love, too, by the way.

I know. And then they kiss. As long as they're hitting the subs. And this is one of the few usage of stock footage in a James Bond movie because apparently they couldn't film their own nuclear explosion. Strange, the public never heard about this. The two offshore nuclear bombs that are... It was the same summer.

Star Wars. The public was really preoccupied. Yeah, good point. Where's the hot girl? She is the Strassburg. Strassburg has taken her

onto his underground city. Oh, it's still going. Yeah. Zip ahead to the jet ski. That he gets delivered to him. Close it. I don't want to argue anymore.

The tension between us. I just got this signal from the Pentagon. We're going to fuck. I couldn't get any more wood paneling in this room. I want you to take a look at the wood paneling in my pants, James. These torpedoes? Whatever you want to call it.

What military submarine has wood paneling in it? How do you have wood paneling on your wall and your ceiling? Do you know that? What is this, Graceland? Next door is the jungle room. That package for Commander Bond, bring it in quick. That package. I need an honor.

Have you ever seen a real doll, James? You're going to get me court martial. Coit Marshall. Okay. One hour. I can't stand mad at you. In 40 minutes, you'll have one hour to find it when those... He just was like, no, he looked in his eyes and said yes.

Yeah, it stared him down. In 40 minutes, you'll have one hour to know when those sucks have five minutes left. Here it is, guys. It's little Nelly. It's just little Nelly. Maybe you should put it together near where you're going to use it instead of here in the room where you won't be able to get it out. A little bicycle.

And it's such an ugly 70s design, too. Look at Roger Moore doing his own stunts, though. They'll never see me on this. He just cut to... Dollar knows, pizzas, delivers! Now, something I'd like to point out, this is the second appearance of Tabasco in a James Bond movie.

Oh, in back-to-back, right? In the beginning, at the very beginning of the man with the golden gun, you hear Christopher Lee yell out Nick knack Tabasco like he just orders

Tabasco from his island And then So here we go Look how good that look is The turtleneck Military jacket I gotta get that going Just day to day

Son what brings you into the naval office today It's a very Hestonian look He was very big with the safari jacket Yeah yeah So he opens up elevator to drop James into the shark tank this is good I like to send a nice touch you did want me to drop in and that's it the villains left like he has no other defense

other than this well I guess he's got the one my tie is bigger mr. yes I know his tie is now a bibb where's ania well it's just a backwards cape British agent in love with the Russian and the front oh yeah Look at that bell. That's all you need. Sit down, Mr. Bunn. Mr. Bunn. Mr. Boone.

Now, this is, I stand by this. This is a total grito. This is the most brutal. James Bond killing of a villain, I think. Really? Yeah. And faster than you think. Why there?

You shot your boat, Stromberg. Now it's my turn. I mean, is that basically right in the balls? That's his crying. Look at his webbed fingers. For good measure. One more. I love that they squibed that old man.

Wow, that's a lot of metal. Yeah, now he runs out into the... Looks like Star Wars right there. Mm-hmm. And that was a very Star Warsian shot. You're going to jump into the garbage compactor? Or the escape chamber? Oh, no, you again.

Oh, he electrocuted him. All right, let's just use the sound from the day there. It jam, it jam. It looks like a burretta. No music. It's kind of bored. That's the thing. Maybe they didn't like the score.

Oh, maybe it could be. Oh, maybe. I could be hot. I find this movie to be a little ponderous. It's just, I don't know. It's like the end of, uh, die another day. It's just like 40 minutes of gun spray. Yeah. Boops, David.

Boom. Trying to get into the escape chamber. By great food. Charmed life. He got lucky twice. I thought being a beetle was a stroke of life. This is very 70s cinema. Yeah.

A lot of jets of water coming at you. Very towering inferno. Yeah. It's a Poseidon adventure. His skate chamber is like fucking sweet. I know. It's very nasty. His skate chamber is like a fuck bot.

That thing's just daring you to escape when there's not an emergency, you know, a little vacation in the escape chamber. I think that's what they mean. All right, explain to me the end of this, the last musical cue. This is the worst. Just with exclamation points, I wrote, this ending. Yeah. The probe droid for Empire Strikes.

Exactly. Same sound, too. I know. I don't know. It really does look like it. Barbara Buck looks fantastic. Which one's Barbara? Oh, gosh.

She'd be opening up. Mr. Stromburg. The man that drinks Domper in your 52, can't be all bad. Oh, she's going to kill him. The mission is over, commander. What? She intends on killing him, but then she chuckles at him opening the champagne.

Her look says, I can't stay vengeful at you. Just because you killed my fiance. Maybe you should just have sex with me. That man is usually allowed a final request. Granted. Zip. I'd like to live out my life with you. Instead of killing me, maybe we could just...

Oh, no. He's okay, everybody. It's like the ending to Pluto and Popeye, remember when he... Sounds like the ending of King Kong versus Godzilla. But James, what would our superiors say? They never got to know. Really, James? God, these guys are always out in the field.

They must hate their wives. They're all diamond members on Delta. It's just Roger Moore's ass up against the window. It's a good last line, though. Worst musical cue in the history of cinema is coming up. Yeah. 007X. What do you think you're doing?

Keeping the British hand up, sir. What? The main musical review is happening right now. That's atrocious. This is basically that blazing saddles. Just get it. I wasn't looking. There it is, everybody.

The spy who loved me. Final thoughts on the spy who loved me? It is two hours and five minutes of why the... 30 minutes. Yeah. Of why the 70s can never be repeated. It's even like it's singular or we can't let this happen again. It's just like it's soaked.

Yeah. It's the 1970s reaching its putrescence. Yeah. I recognize why people think this is the best more, but I don't watch this one that often. No, for your eyes only is the best more. If you could just strip out the music, it'd be great. Yeah. I, you know, I think this is, I think this is a good James Bond movie.

It is a good James Bond movie. I just don't enjoy it as much, though. It's like a James Bond action comedy. Yeah. It's not super good and it's not super bad. So I tend to gravitate towards those two. It's better than Moonraker. But I watch Moonraker more because it's like a cluster fuck of how did this happen.

Yeah, it is. I saw Moonraker when it came out. And even I and in, yeah, at the time, what did you think of it? No, it was in ninth grade. It was like, you're just at the point where like you're getting to the point where not everything, not every movie you see is the best movie you've ever seen. Right. Yeah.

Yeah. I just remember my only memory of it really was when he's wrestling with a snake, I just remember, like, God, this is fake. Yeah. That's right. He wrestled with a snake. Oh, I can't wait to do that one. Janelle, final thoughts on the sky.

From a medical viewpoint. How does it hold up? Very realistic. Physiologically, how does this hold it? Makes me want to go see Star Wars, actually. Well, yeah, that corridor does kind of make you want to watch. Open the blast doors. Open the blast doors.

Do you find Roger Moore to be an attractive... Yeah, he's cute. Oh, nice. I mean, he's rakeish. I enjoy him. He tends to be... More than Pierce Brosnan. Pierce Brosnan just looks like...

Pierce Broson's not cute. Pierce Broson looks like he would be a bad boyfriend, though. Yeah. He looks like he'd be like, you fucking embarrass me at that party. Weirdly what I hear about Pierce Brosman is that he is the most loving husband that has ever been. He seems like it. Yeah. Yeah.

He double-birded my friend of mine was. Oh, yeah? Stole a parking space. And then I'm like, oh, I thought there was some kind of sexual term, like, spit roast. No, he double. Snowballing. Snowballing. It's pretty good to be double-birded by Pierce Bros.

Yeah. And then my friend, this is in a parking, mini mall in Malibu. This guy's an agent. He's nobody, you know, he's going to a parking space. He comes in like a Porsche or like a Kuntash one. He, like, steals his space. And he gets out of the car, looks, he just flips him off, double burns. And my brother said, Jesus is all right.

Go James Bond flip me off. Okay, whatever. And then he goes into this restaurant and Brosson's in the restaurant and he sees him and he flips him off again. Oh, my God. I'm just trying to eat. My friend Jeremy was down at Disneyland and he pulled off in a gas station to get gas and there's a limo. And it's a gas station like complex and there's a pizza hut and a Taco Bell. Oh, we were there last night.

Okay. And out of the Taco Bell comes Brosnan heading towards a limo just eating the chalupa or whatever. Wow. Brosnan is like this man about town who everyone has a weird story about running into Pierce Brosson. Brosnan crosses your life like Forrest Gump. Yeah. I was at the Vanity Fair Oscar party one year. Oh, God.

You're so snobby. I felt like I got hit by a bus. And then I felt these hands like, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. And it was like getting hit by a missile. That's the best. He's just a human rock.

Really? Yeah, wow. Yeah. God bless that man. I can't wait to have him on the podcast. Daniel Craig will be our guest sometime never. Oh, my. Oh, that's all. That would be amazing. Yeah, I say, listen, everyone, we're in the drudges of Roger Moore right now. We've got a view to a kill next, Moonraker. Oh, you're not doing them chronologically?

We're not bouncing back and forth. I see what you're doing. From front to back. And then meeting in the middle. Oh, man, so you've already done a view to a kill. No. No, not yet. That's next. But that's the last.

I would think you would go live and let die of you to a kill the exact middle movie so we went we went we went doctor no skyfall oh I see what I sure we came into it and we're meeting in the middle and the middle is for your eyes only we have a special view to a kill episode we can't say anything more than that yeah oh I bet I know yeah yeah I don't even know what's happening I know you're writing out things we can just say it after the air yeah because you don't edit unlike some people unlike some actually podcast where you're like, oh my God, effort went into this. This is amazing. Listen to the Dana Goldauer, please, everybody. Do you have anything to plug, Janelle? Sorry, everyone. No. You're getting a dog? You're getting a dog?

What kind of a dog? Where can people see you get a new dog? I need to hear of this dog situation. I rescued the dog from a shelter. Oh, do you know what the breed is, or is it a mix? No, I didn't rescue it. You're a liar. I'm lying. The real story is I adopted it from a breeder.

That's all right. Listen, here's the deal with that. Don't feel guilty about that because that dog was already born and someone has to take care of it. That's true. It's a Labradoodle. An Australian Labradoodle. That's great. That's great.

You know, you did. We rescued a bunch of cats. It's not like, here's the deal. She filled my house with cats that I didn't have. It's not like you pre-ordered the dog before it was born. This was a born dog that needed to get taken care of it. I didn't do that. I know.

I didn't do that. I didn't do that. The dog was born. Someone had to take care of it. So listen, people. out there if you see people who have a dog and they don't answer the question of like oh do you know how old it is and they happen to know that means that they probably got it from a breeder but listen the dog was born someone had to take care of it you could say

rescue like I'm gonna open a diamond ring rescue some diamonds as long as it's adopting people buy it's a cute little dog with the best name ever don't adopt conflict dog so you can see Janelle at the dog park by Dana's house Matt you can see Not noodles. No, noodles. Noodles of the dog. If you're watching television at all this winter, you can see Matt try and sell us Volkswagen. Constantly.

I'm a little tired of it. I understand. I apologize. I have a new podcast called I was there, too, where I interview people that were present in great scenes of cinema history and tell their story. So check that out. What do you mean? Like the woman with the baby carriage in the Untouchables shootout scene in the stairway. You know her?

No. Well, we find them. and talk about Well this you can do this Doug Benson was an extra in the Blade Runner I've already had him on for Captain EO Oh okay It hasn't aired yet but aired

When he was in Blade me I know and I plan to bring him back Because he was also in Commando He's also in Nightmare and Elm Street Three Oh yeah He's a gold mine for this podcast He's amazing

Doug also been on this podcast a number of times Doug's just great for podcasts One time Just once Yeah We haven't had them twice I think we may have them back from Moon Raker. There you go, everybody.

Yeah, follow Dana Gold on Twitter. It's now Dana Gold. He dropped the J. I finally got it. He finally got it. He finally got Dana Gould. Matt Goorley. Matt Goorley, G-O-U-R-E-Y.

My middle name is J-2. What's your middle name? John. Oh, James. James. James. Oh, James. Matt Myra.

M-I-R-A. And you can follow us James Bonding Pod on Twitter. Do you want to get it out? I don't. Oh, good for you. I don't have one. Stay pure. I'm not that cool. Stay pure. Stay pure.

She has nothing to say. All she does is save people's lives. No, I tried to get it, and I didn't know what to say, so I deleted it. I was following you, and no one was following me. No, I've met the coolest. It does it for James Monick. Chase Bonning will return in a view to a kill, in some form or another. Come stop morning.

Oh, boy. Patrick Mittney is the young guy. Oh, the Rolls-Royce, buddy. Yes. Now leavingnerdist.com. Hey, this is Arnie Neckamp from the Improv Fantasy podcast. Hello from the Magic Tavern. I fell through a dimensional portal behind a Burger King in Chicago

into the magical land of food, and I started a podcast. Season three has just begun with a brand new adventure to defeat the Dark Lord. If you're a new listener or you've fallen behind season three is a great jumping on, And we've got great guests like Justin McElroy. I sound like a fancy college professor. Fake nuts. Rachel Bloom. You all see my collection of men, corpses, and one woman.

Felicia Day and Colton Dunn. You've seen me have intercourse with a variety of species. It's a bummer. Andy Daly. You have the members of Genesis listed, but Phil Collins has crossed out and then circledly cross out again. Yes, I have killed Phil Collins twice. Thomas Middletch. Jesus.

I mean... Jaisos, ruler of the eighth circle. And that's just the beginning. Season three, A Fellow from the Magic Tavern is out now. Listen in Stitcher, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.