James Bonding - Top Ten Odd Casting Choices for James Bond Movies

Episode Date: November 8, 2023

Matt and Matt each made lists with what they feel are the TOP TEN oddest casting choices. These are the actors that stood out. Some for good reasons and others for being Wayne Newton. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Matt and Matt and, Matt, James Bonding Podcast. Myra, Gourley, Gourley, Mahera. James Bonding Podcast, it's the James Bonding Podcast, it's the James Bonding podcast, it's the James Bonding podcast, it's the James Bonding podcast, it's the James Bonding podcast, it's the James Bonding podcast with Matthews Myra. And Gourley Matthews Hey everybody, welcome for James Bonding podcast. I'm Matt.

And I'm also Matt and this is the oddest casting choices of the James Bond films inspired by last week's episode with Christian Brun who I think sort of inadvertently inspired us

to do this. Yeah, it was quite a feat and I have to tell you I dove back into the James Bond casting choices and could have done a list of 50. Yeah, I think you're right.

In fact, it's worth saying that there are almost different categories, and by odd, we just mean, how best to explain this, that it doesn't necessarily mean bad because there are some inspired ones that are just odd. It just means I didn't expect that, and boy, there really are more than a few of those, huh? It's really fascinating. I came up with this list, and as I was going through it, I was going through it, I was. I was just really surprised that how many choices where I was like, oh, yeah, that was weird. Yeah.

Oh, that was weird, too. And I put some people in my list, Matt, that quite frankly didn't have a lot to do in the movie, but made an indelible mark on my brain. That's exciting. I look forward to getting to those. I should mention that I kind of had three categories. So one of them is honorable mentions. and another one is because these odd casting choices can also be inspired, but they should also be odd.

I have one category of just plain inspired. And those, for instance, are like Christopher Walken and Grace Jones. You know, they play their roles differently, but it's not like they're odd choices. They were smart choices. And then this might be a little controversial. I actually thought Madonna was a pretty decent choice. It just didn't work out well. You know, like, it's not crazy that they put her in.

Oh, sure. It didn't go that well. Same maybe with John Cleese or your... Maybe we'll see. And then I had Clifton James and Ruby in that category of just pure inspired. I love Ruby from On Her Majesty Secret Service. She's not like any other Bond Girl and that she's really just kind of, I don't know, like, smart and funny and a little aggressive in her own right.

You know, she kind of calls the shots in a lot of ways like you don't normally see, especially at that time. I have to say that the, I mean, I would honestly, I could list Michael G. Wilson ten times. I have him in my honorable mention. In fact, both of my honorable mentions are cameos. Michael G. Wilson and Richard Branson, which takes me out of Casino Royale every time.

He's getting squatted down in the TSA security thing at the airport. Is it the fact that he's not flying a private jet that bothers you? I know it's not he's not flying one of those water hose jet pack machines that seems to be his best mode of travel I don't know if he even does one of those I can't imagine he's not he has an island I think as soon as you have an island you are automatically given a water jet jet pack because how else are you're going to get to that island yeah I mean you have to move from side to side of the beach the hose has to be long enough, first of all.

It's a whole ordeal. But, you know, they're super rich. They can handle that kind of thing. Well, I had fun choosing these, and we each are going to do 10. They're our own 10, so it's not like we're choosing from an agreed upon 10. Yeah. Man, I have a question for you regarding your list. Did you make a list of 10 and then in that 10 put these honorable mentions in,

or were those bonus people? Those are bonus people. Oh, so kind of you to give our audience bonus people. Well, you know. Because you make me feel like I didn't do enough work. No, you were not expected to. I went above and beyond. And it was solely because I was just waiting for you to call me on FaceTime.

Well, Matt, it's really fun. Should we start at the bottom of our lists? I think that's the best. We'll just go back and forth, I suppose. Yeah. Start with number 10 and head to number one. Matt, who's your number 10 most odd casting choice in the James Bond films? Oh, well, you know, part of it has.

to do with his mullet and the rest of it has to do with the way he acted in the movie i'm talking about none other than mikhail gorvoy who played vlad the weird inventor in die another day oh see i'd put him and inspired no for me it's just uh he's just such an odd duck like there's some there's some people in the james bond uh panphy on that I just, that sit in my brain in a spot where I'm not like, not like Tiger Tanaka, where Tiger Tanaka is like, I love that guy, he's awesome. Yeah. But Vlad, where I'm like, why is this person in my head?

Yeah, he does stick with you. I'll never get, I'll never get that brain synops back. Yeah, I know what you're saying. It's gone. It's been given to this guy, Vlad, who, his origin and how he started working with the North Korean general or colonel, I suppose. I don't want to give him a better rank than he actually has. It's unclear. It's unclear what he's doing. Why he, like, he loves timing jet cars. He also likes making satellite lasers. I don't know. I found him to be. I got some bad news for you

because now he's occupying more of your brain because you've given him this position of status now. This platform is for you, Mikhail. Great job, I suppose. I mean, these people should be delighted. Yeah. I actually really like that guy. I think he's a highlight of an otherwise pretty strange and awful film. Oh, that's interesting. So, Matt, I want to ask you, who's your number 10? Oh, thank you for returning the favor. I'm going to go with Zena Marshall, Miss Terro from Dr. No, solely because she's so, white and playing an Asian woman. Oh, yeah. She even has, I believe, blue eyes or something like that. And I think it's funny, I looked her up on IMDB and her bio basically says this dark-haired beauty. And I feel like for at the time, that was enough. Like, oh, she's got dark hair. She can clearly

play an Asian. But she's like French and Scotch, Irish or something. And, you know, there's definitely, they didn't shy away from yellow face back then, but they certainly had Asian actors they could have used, as evidenced by many of them in Goldfinger, you know. Do you think that the casting choice is, do you find it odd for the time? Like, they probably totally could have found someone. They could have, but I don't find it odd for the time

because I think that that was done quite a bit. I think my biggest criteria is does it kind of take me out of the film? And that does. And I remember even early on seeing that movie going, oh, she, she's Asian? I don't understand because they dress her Asian. And it just, I, I spent too much time trying to figure out if I was reading it right or wrong. And I don't think that's necessarily a good thing for the movie. Sure. Do you find that, I mean, taking you out of the movie is a great criteria. for this list. Yeah.

I fear that having, now that you have that criteria, you're going to find some of my choices are like, you're crazy, man. This is perfect casting. That's okay. Well, I think you might find some of these put you in the movie.

I don't know. They take me out. In fact, I'm looking at all of my 10, and they take me out of the movie. Some of them, they take me out in wonderful ways. They take me out for a night on the town.

Take out for a luxurious evening of caviar and, Dancing. Okay, so Matt, I feel like you're, again, I don't know, I feel like you're going to be disappointed again with my number nine. I support you. My number nine is, I love, by the way, that I've had to look up all of these actors' names. Oh, yeah. So my number nine is, of course, Anatole Tobman.

Oh, I know who is. He played Elvis in Quantum of Solace. And for me, he's just one of the oddest-looking henchmen who is also the least effective. Yeah, I'll agree with you there. I love him in that movie, but I understand he is odd. But I do think he's cast for his oddness as opposed to an odd choice by the casting directors. Well, to me, I find that the hairdo, I wonder how much discussion was really, had over his hair, his wig.

Like, it is such a, it's such a bananas haircut. I actually think. But deliberately so. Yeah, I feel like I either read an interview with him or heard something where he may have chosen that because he wanted something, like not a gimmick, because at that time they weren't doing gimmicks for henchmen and villains, but he wanted something and that's what they agreed on. Like, he wanted a bad toupee for the character or something.

Well, he delivered. Anatole, you, sir, are number nine. His name is also just fun to say. Anatole Topman? Anatole Topman. Who played Elvis. They didn't give him a last name. I know, his name's Elvis, too.

That's another thing. Some of the people on my list that I had no idea what their name was. Yeah. You mean even their character names? Correct. Yeah. Because it's not mentioned in the movie that he's Elvis, I don't think. Right, right.

and it's just really that added an extra layer. When the character name was weirder, I was like, oh, I've made the right choice. Yeah, Vlad. So far, yours are Vlad and Elvis. Yeah. Matt, do you have a number nine? Okay. My number nine is the first real example of, I think this is good.

I like this character. I like this casting, but I do find it to be odd. And that is Jack Lord in Doctor. No. Solely because... Oh, the Lord takes you out of the movie. Well, a little bit, but the least among my ten. But I think what's odd to me is that...

And maybe they're going for this, but I don't get the sense that they do, is that he's kind of like as dashing and good-looking as James Bond. And it seems weird to have that competition going on, you know? I don't know. I don't know if I'm right about this one, but I do think about it every time I see him. And of course, this is not the casting director. his fault. But those cats eye glasses. Now I'm thinking maybe they cast them and went, oh, this guy's really giving Connery a run for his money. We got to fem him up a little and they gave

some cats eye glasses. I like to imagine that Jaglord insisted on wearing those. Like he was like, I am so masculine that I can wear these sunglasses and women will find me even more attractive. Yeah. Or he just showed up to shoot and then he had him on and nobody said anything. Everybody just assumed that that was a choice someone made and nobody asked and they just made it in. I forget who, I think it was Maria Manunos. She was, we did a nerdist podcast with her and her husband was so obsessed with Jack Lord

that she bought him at an auction Jack Lord's presentation pistols. What? That had like pearl grips. Oh my God. They had his name on it, Jack Lord. I would love to. to have those. When you say presentation pistols, do you mean like, like, classic dueling pistols or just the type you'd

put on a wall? They were, they were fancy. They were not, I feel like they're not like your average sidearm, you know, I feel like they're more like a display sidearm. Presentation pistols. When do I get my presentation pistols? By the way, I don't know that I could have just coined that term. I love it. So if you're out there and you'd like to give us presentation pistols. I would love to just have company over and as soon as they come in, let me present to you my pistols. Oh, you want to take a look at my presentation pistols? Well, this one has a pearl grip. It's a, it's a Beretta. I bet it was a Beretta too, the Hawaii 50 days, you know? Yeah.

Anyway, I just, I've always remembered that. Like, I've never heard of someone being such a a fan of Jack Lord. Yeah, I haven't either. Is it the Hawaii 5-0? Is it that he's so famous now? That's all I can think of. Right, right. All right, what's your number eight?

Well, Matt, this is a character whose name I didn't know until today, but whose performance has stuck with me for years. I'm talking about Jerry Duggan in the film Goldfinger as Hawker the golf caddy for James Bond. Oh yes. But he's odd again, huh?

Are you confusing odd with memorable? I don't know. Sir, it's your honor. Sir, it's your honor. If that's his ball, then I'm our old Palmer. Like, I've memorized all of his lines,

every delivery of which he gets. And it's just, I mean, it's a credit to the man, I suppose. Maybe my list is ass backwards. I don't know. I knew the reason I would enjoy this is that I knew I would be forgetting lots of people because I've been scanning the movies in my brain and I did not even think of him,

but that's a great choice. He's, when you really think about it in that movie, he is James Bond's odd job. Yeah. And his name is Hawker. Hocker. And also his name is Jerry Duggan, spelled exactly. like comic book writer and friend of the pod, well, a friend of me, Jerry Duggan. Yeah, he's a nice fella that guy.

I love Jerry. I bet they both are. You know, I'm willing to bet that the hawker Jerry Duggan is no longer with us. I think you're probably right. In fact, he probably lasted a week after the movie. What? Oh, this is a fun. This is a fun game.

This is a new sprinkle in this. Are they alive or dead? No, no. It's not even that. that's not the game. You're very close, though. Matt, tell me, what year do you think Jerry Duggan, the actor who portrayed Hocker, died? All right, Goldfinger came out in what? In 64. I'm going to play along. I'm going to play along. I'll say 1970. You think he died in 1970. So you think that we saw him six years before he passed? Yeah. I think he held on. I think he held on. I think.

think he held on until 1981. That's my guess. Here we go. Looking it up. Whoa! Jerry Duggan was with us until

1992. Wow. How old was he when he died? He was 81. He was born in 1910. Jeez. And so he was 54 in Goldfinger. Born in...

He's 54 in Goldfinger? He's 54 in that movie. He seems 70. 54. He's 10 years older than me right now in that way. He was born in Dublin, Ireland, and passed away in Sydney, New South Wales, Australia. Oh, good for him. Got some son in his golden years.

He really, he's one of my favorite peripheral, weird characters. And as far as things that I, other things, I've seen that he has been in, the answer is nothing. He's been in a lot of stuff, but I've not seen any of the things he's in. Well, let me ask you this about Zena Marshall, who played Miss Terro. Do you think she's alive or dead? Oh, Zena Marshall, who played Miss Terro? Oh, I think everyone at home right now is enjoying this new wrinkle we've added to this podcast. Yeah, I agree. I agree. And she was, that was 62. It was 50 years ago. She's alive. She's dead.

No! But when did she die? I mean, she's got to, she probably died when she was 72 years old. So she died in, in 2012. 2009, she was aged 84. Wow. She stopped acting in 67, and she was born in Nairobi, Kenya. That's probably because she was like, you know what, I'm going to settle down and have a wonderful life.

That's right. Without this camera in front of me. Yeah, I've played a bond girl. That's all I need. What else do you need? I mean, I tell you what, the second I get cast is a bond girl, done. Yeah, same here. Because then I'll be saying, what's wrong with me? Although, if they do a female bond, we could do. Oh, okay, now I'm on board. Now I'm on board. The bow fatale. Now I'm on board.

You know what, I don't even want to be that. I want to be, I'll be the first, I'll be the guy that she gets out of bed at the beginning of the movie. Same here. See you never see again. Oh, I'll just be the, the eye candy behind the desk. at a hotel. Yeah. I'd be like, your drink, Miss Bond. I love it.

All right. My number eight. Yeah, let's hear it. Number eight is the, just the barely voiced charms of Wayne Newton in license to kill.

Now, it makes sense that he's playing that role because he's kind of a personality himself and he's playing a cheesy personality, but it still takes me out. They could have easily just put, any unknown actor in there. Sure.

It would have probably been a bit smoother. But I think he's really good in the movie. Oh, he's fantastic in the movie. But it is odd. He's great in Vegas vacation as well. But in Vegas vacation, he's playing himself. Yeah, that's what. And I suppose he's...

He's also in Ford Fairlane. Right. He's playing a heightened version of himself in... Yeah. In License to Kill, I think. We talk about that when she steals the money back when they're running and he just isn't mad and he just goes, Bless you. So good.

Okay, Matt, now, since we both know that Wayne Newton is still with us, here's my question to you. This is our trivia question. This is our guessing game with Wayne Newton. How old was Wayne Newton when licensed to kill came out? Oh, okay, so that's 89. How old is he now? can't tell you that. I know.

I'm just talking to my brain. Okay. All right. Let's hear your brain. I'd say he's probably close to 80. So that was, what, 30 years ago. Yeah. That movie.

I can't. He had to be in his 50s. Maybe not. I'll put him at 52. You'll put him at 52. So that was 89. You think he was 52 and 89. You know, Dunker Shane came out.

You know, he was a kid, though. Yeah, he was a kid. So let's say he was 16 and Dunker Shane came out. I'm going to say he was born in 19, 19, I'm going to say he was born in 1945. So that would make him 54 when that movie came out. Okay. All right, let's see. Wayne Newton, ladies and gentlemen, was born in 1942.

So he was 50. Oh, so he's 76. He was 57 years old in that movie. 57, wow, okay. Right? No, 47. Are you kidding me? He's 47 in that movie?

Right, 1942 to 1980s 47. He's 47 years old. Three years older than me right now. Do you feel like the world, like this is making you feel youthful or old? Old. But you think about how you look. You look so much younger than Wayne Newton does in that movie. I don't know.

I took a look in the mirror the other day and just about helped myself to a, to like, I wanted to help myself walk. Does that make sense? Like I wanted to grab, put one arm on my small on my back and the other grab my hand and go, hey grandpa, do you need to sit down? Is it the fact that your beard is the greatest white I've ever seen in a beard? It is pretty gray. I love that. I love that beard. You got a great beard going on.

You know, what I want you not to do, Matt, is get as much plastic surgery as the Wayne Newton picture I've just sent you. There's no possible way another human could get that much plastic surgery. What did you send it via email or text? I said I text message it to you. I'm excited to see this. It's insane. It's insane. All right. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You have to send this to Emily to put on Instagram. And it's not that we're, you know, into making fun of people's plastic surgery,

but this is a whole new level. I mean, it's really just a, you wonder how he would have aged naturally. You know what I mean? Virtually unrecognizable. I don't know. I mean, when I look at this guy, I really, I see Wayne Newton,

i.e., take a look at this next one. Oh, God. The whole shape of his mouth has changed. He looks at different ethnicity. He does. He suddenly looks Filipino. Matt, how do we deal with the fact that we both may have Wayne Newton on our list? I think that that just makes a lot of sense.

Is he next for you? He's not next for me. Okay. So here's what I'm going to do. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to implement a miniature James Bonding ranking system. So like if I say one that you have, but it's not for a little while, we'll say hold the conversation. He's coming up for me.

Oh, okay. And then we'll go. Got it. Feel good? Yeah. All right. Now, Matt, yeah.

Here's one for you that I feel like you are going to call me a lunatic for even putting on this list. This is number seven, right? This is, let's see, Hawker. Yes, this is number seven. Okay. No. 10, nine, yeah, it is. It's number seven.

Okay. My number seven casting choice is Michael, Gothard, aka Locke from For Your Eyes Only. I thought of him. Oh, you did. I did because he's not your quintessential hitman one way or the other. Like he's not crazy looking, but he's also not super dashing.

I get this one. Totally. I love him. I think it's inspired and it turned out well, but I wouldn't have thought it on paper. That didn't seem like a good idea. I think he's for sure. Oh, I think he's still. live, right? No, I think he's dead.

Ooh. What's his name? Warren Zevon? What is his name? Warren Ziva. Michael, Michael Gothard? Godthard? Yeah, Michael Gothard. Yeah, Michael Gothard. Yeah. Okay, so the question I guess we're asking is, so you say he was, you say he's dead, right? Yeah. Okay, so you're saying he passed away some years.

years ago, right? Would you like to do the game of what year did they die? Or the game of, okay, well, here's, oh, well, forget. Forget it. The game I was going to play, which I will play by myself and everyone at home can have a listen. Okay. How old was he? During the production of Free Your Eyes Only.

Oh, yeah. So because he's such an odd duck, I got to say he's a 37 years old in that movie. In that movie? Yeah. Okay, so that was 80 or 81 that movie, I forget. Not 82? No, 83 was Octopussy. It must be 81.

Let me check that really quickly. Yes, 81. So, hold on. He's 42. Oh, okay. I wasn't far off. Hold on. Wait till you see.

what I'm going to send to you right now. Guys, I wish you could all be a part of this. Well, this one you can. You can just simply Google Hangout. Google, and you should, Google Michael Gothard in Warlords of Atlantis. Hold on. I can't get it off IMDP. Oh, no.

Warlords of Atlanta. I'll look it up right now. Warlords of Atlantis. What happens in a picture called Warlords? Lords of Atlantis. But I hope it's the right one. Okay. Yeah, the first Google image search that comes up.

Michael Gauthored. In Warlords of Atlantis. Let's see. Oh, my. That is quite a haircut. He's actually quite a handsome younger man. Oh, my goodness. I can't believe he's no longer with us.

And he's often wearing these type of glasses in the movies, too. so. I feel like that was a style they saw and they were like, you know, we need him. Wow. That's a hell of a page boy haircut. That is like...

But it also has a widow's peak of some kind. I can't believe he passed so soon. It's 53 years old. Poor guy. Oh, man. All right. Oh, did not want to know that.

What? He had suffered from depression and he took his own life. Oh, no. I know. Does he say how he did it? Yes, he hanged himself. Oh, geez. Oh, boy.

Matt, it's time to hear from one of our sponsors. That's right. Thanks for, okay, here we go. Hey, listen, you might know about the humor website, crack.com, but did you know that there's a cracked podcast on Earwolf? What? Matt, I had no idea there was a cracked podcast on Earwolf. I did because I've been on it twice. What? That's right.

That's so weird that you have the Cracked podcast seal of approval, but I do not. If you're listening, Cracked, put this guy on there. He's got nothing but time. Yeah, come on, Alex. You've been on our podcast. Anyway, I know what happens on this podcast, Matt. Each week, Alex Schmidt and guests dissect pop culture tropes, debunk myths, and talk about stuff that thecracked. dot com viewers may like.

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subscribe to Cracked in Apple Podcast Stitcher or your favorite podcast app. Done. And we're back and we didn't even like cut. That was just one all smooth take. Well, I just was like, which podcast would feel the best about a segue from suicide?

And the answer, of course, is cracked. Well, they had no choice. Okay, my number seven. I can't wait to hear your number seven. I feel like it's going to be a good one. It is a big one. Mm. And once again, I feel like I have to stress that I mostly like this, but Charles Gray is blow

I think was an odd choice. I can see where you're coming from with that because, of course, we had already met Charles Gray. Right. And it's such a left turn from what we're used to from Blofeld, but maybe that's what they were going for. But either way, it isn't clear. It's also not really a, I mean, it's not a different bond actor.

So, like, if it's a different bond actor, perhaps, you know what I mean? Yeah. But it is, it is Sean Connery, who should. shared a scene with Charles Gray. Yeah, like Brad or Joe Don Baker has two different bonds. He's in Dalton. He's in Brosnan. Of course, Brasden being the better of the two.

As we remember, Joe Don Baker, of course, is in Tomorrow Never Dies, one of the greatest James Bond films of all time. If you're scheduling between, what, 1995 and 1996, I think, or whatever that thing came out. It came out in 1997. It's the most 1997 of all things. That's for sure. It came out the same time as Titanic, Matt.

How could you not remember that? Oh, yeah. Because I think I saw Titanic like three times in the theater. Near far, wherever you are. My heart will go on. I have a question for you, Matt. Yes, sir. And that is when did Charles Gray shuffle off the mortal coil?

This is a great question. He seems healthy to me. I have no clue. So I'm going to say he died in, Is he an EY or an AY before I hit the Google button? I want to say AY. Okay. But I'm not sure.

I'm going to say he died in 89. That's interesting. His last appearance was in Diamonds Are Forever, right? So that's 1971. Should we change the episode title from oddest casting choices to when did these actors die? Matt, if you don't like the game, we can move off the game. But I'm honestly having a delightful time. like it.

I'm going to guess he died not... I feel bad for Loke, but I like it. He didn't make it out of the 70s. That's what I think. I think he died in 1979. Here we go. Let's see. Let's go to the machine.

2000! Whoa! I can't believe I didn't hear about that. That's incredible. How old was he? He was... Wait a minute. Was he acting into his later?

He was born in 1928. So he was 72 years old. Oh, that still seems young. Wait, how old was he? What? What? I'm learning so much. So he was 40.

No. Okay, so hang on. What? Hang on. In you only live twice, right? Which came out in 1967. He was 39 years old. Oh, my God.

He played Blofeld, Matt, at the age of 42. Oh, my God. Are you telling me that Diamonds Are Forever Blowfeld is two years younger than me. I'm telling you that Diamonds Are Forever Blowfeld, who lives at the top of the White House, is younger than you are, Matt. I'm looking at his resume here. Is second to last. Second to last credit is something called the Titchborn claimant. What?

Do you know there's a whole series of these movies like this, like the Holcraft Covenant, the Anderson tapes, the something conspiracy, these like 70 spy movies, although this one's 1998. What the hell is the Titchborn claimant? The Titch? Oh, by the way, he's on two episodes of Tales from the Poop Dick. I saw that. Admiral Dennis Doth.

He was working right up till the end. He just looks like mostly English stuff that he probably didn't have to leave far from his home. What's the first thing I recognize going back through his... I'll tell you, the first thing I recognize is... There's some Sherlock Holmes, but it's like some TV stuff. Comedy of Airs. Oh, boy. Wow.

Shock treatment. That's the first thing I meant, I recognize. That's like that spiritual follow-up to Rocky Horror Picture Show. Tales and Errors, I think I remember, as being a children's show. Wow. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was like, they would do like Annie Oakley and Paul Bunyan, like that kind of thing. Oh, he's also in the movie The Legacy in 1978, which always scared me because there's like

a girl goes swimming in a swimming pool and then a glass cover goes over the top just under the water when she goes down and she comes up and she's drowned. Oh, that's a terrible way to go. That's all I know about this movie is that Sam Elliott is in it and Catherine Ross. I might have to check this film out. Do you think that this has affected the way you swim? I think it did it one time. Oh, he's also in the island.

Oh, man, there's lots of stuff here. I love that we're finding out so much. much about Patrick. He plays Malvolio in 12th Night. Now that I would like to see. I bet he's great in that. We should, should we do a podcast

just about Charles Gray's Body Award? I could. I love this man. Do you think that would be any enjoyable at all? Yeah, I mean, look at some of the titles of these movies, Mosquito Squadron, the File of the Golden Goose, the Nine Ages of Naked Oh, man. Okay. Matt, it's time for my number. Sorry, he does a voiceover in Lawrence of Arabia,

uncredited. Well, that's pretty great. All right, sorry, go ahead. No, I was just going to get to my number six, but honestly, we don't have to. We can just do a Charles Gray podcast now. No, no, we can't. We can't. Okay, here's one that I feel like you're going to be like, what the, are you talking about? You say that every time. I know, I know. Okay. I'm going to give you the character name, and you're still going to go,

who the fuck are you talking about? Ready? Okay, I'm exciting. I'm excited. Jack Strap is the name of the character. Jack Strap? Who's that? That is,

Jack Strap is played by Hal Galili, and he is the most vocal of the gangsters in Goldfinger. Oh, I know who he is, yeah. You know, I just wanted to give an honorable mention to everyone who played a gangster in that movie because it's the worst.

But he seems pretty gangstery to me. So he stuck out to you, huh? He did stick out to me, and you know what's interesting about him? He stuck out to me, and I just popped over to his IMD. Sure. Right, just to see what else is this guy done? Sure.

And Matt, I'm going to tell you, he has been in about 50 things I've seen. Really? Oh, I don't know if you're familiar with a little film called Superman 2. Who does he play in that? The Man in the Diner. Oh, I know the guy that the bully, the one that beats him up. Wait a minute, what's his name? Hal Galili, G-L-I-L-I.

Hal Galilee He's in Dr. Strangelove Who is he in Dr. Strangelove? Oh my God Burpleson AFB defense guy Oh Oh Yeah so

Let me tell you This He's in so many episodes of The Saint You can't even wrap your head around it Yeah He's just been everywhere But I of course Remember him mostly

from his overly New York accent in Goldfinger as Jack Strap. Yeah, he's played a lot of gangsters, that's for sure. Jack Strap. Jack Strap. Oh, he's in Casino Royale. The 66-6 one? Yeah. Yeah.

Wow. Okay, well, my number six, and again, I love the actor. I love the character. It just takes me out a little bit. an odd one, but I love it. Vijay, Armitrage, and Octopus. Oh, man. Pro tennis player. He almost made my list.

Yeah. He's not the greatest actor, but he's such a likable person and personality. He's so likable in it. I really, I feel for him when he dies more than I do most any of bonds like fallen allies. I always feel for the guy and for your eyes only that dies and that loke kills and leaves the dove pin, you know, and is it a Ferrari? Here's my list of guys I feel for, right? Yeah. It's not a long list, but it is as follows.

Dove guy, of course. Dove guy, yeah, okay. Door slam guy in license, in living daylights. The guy who finally decides to help him. Right. VJ, of course. Yeah. And I think really.

That's it. No, Mathis. Mathis. I'm sorry I forgot about Mathis. Yeah. But, you know, Mathis, I really felt about Mathis the way that James Bond did. Like, I just put him in a dumpster, like the dumpster of my mind. And I was like, I have to forget about this as quickly as possible and move on with my mission. Yeah, that was a strange choice.

My mission to enjoy James Bond movies, I'm going to put Mathis in a dumpster. So I want to hear a little bit more of why? Why? I just think, because I think especially at the time, every would have would have just known him as a tennis player. Sure. And I think it's because he was friends with broccoli, but probably also like, you're Indian.

Let's put you in this thing, you know. Who knows? You're Indian and famous. Was he like a tennis lover? Was there any sort of cubby broccoli tennis love that went on? Probably. I don't really know. I was like, you know, I should get in this picture.

Yeah. Yeah. All right, what's your number five? Don't take that yawn personally. No, I don't. It's a little late. It's almost 9 p.m. We mentioned how old I was.

Okay. This is a bit of casting in a similar way to the way that Matt chose people based on them, taking him out of the movie. Great actor, a legendary performance, as a certain. Godfrey Tibbitt. That's right. Patrick McNee. From A View to a Kill

has made the list because he takes me out of the movie. And why does he take me out of the movie? Well, sure, it's partially because as a child,

I did see the Avengers TV series in black and white on VHS before I saw View to a Kill. So I would watch that.

So then when he showed up, I was like, oh my God. That's part of it. But the other part of it is now in a post-div-D world where he does the narration for the first 20 James Bond documentaries that are on the DVDs. Like the secret world of Goldfinger. He does the narration for all of them. So his voice, I just associate with that.

So hearing him actually in a James Bond movie for me takes me out of it. Yeah, I agree. Patrick McNey, Sir Godfrey Tibbet of Udo a kill. His casting is a little meta, is a little winking, like if they were to put Connery in Skyfall. It's just a little too clever or something. But even though, I think he's great in the movie. I have a question for you, Matt.

Yeah. How old do you think Patrick McNee was in a view to a kill? Oh. I think the way to do this is think of what you think it is and then subtract at least 15 years. So I'll say he's 56. So let's see. He made that movie in 1985. So he would have been 62 years old.

Oh, wow. I have to tell you, I was in San Francisco this weekend, and I drove right by City Hall, and I just imagined it burning, and a big hook and ladder coming by. And I looked over at the Golden Gate Bridge, and all that John Barry score just rang in my head. And there's nothing at any given time,

whether I think of it on my own or I'm reminded of that movie for some reason, just good feelings flood through my whole soul. It's a great film. And, you know, I hope soon we get you that frame that you've always wanted for that poster. Oh, you got me such a nice poster for Christmas. You put it up in a prime, prime spot, man.

Yeah. I don't want you hiding it. On the front door in a weatherproof frame. How old do you think, this is a bonus question, how old do you think Patrick Meek was when he passed away? Well, he was 62 and 85. I feel like he lasted quite a while. Well, of course he did because of those documentaries. So he's into the 90s for sure.

I'm going to say, I'll say he was 78. 93. He died in 2015. 2015? Yes. How did I not remember them? We were doing this podcast. Why? Oh, my God.

Oh, Patrick. I, that was, this is, quite frankly, the most fun we've ever done, had a podcast, too. I mean, I'm having a blast right now. I am, too. Well, get ready for that to change because you're not going to like my number five. Oh, no. But unless I say, once again, just for the record, you can't say Pierce Brosman. I know.

I thought about it. This is not, but it's Brosnan related. I love this actor. I really do. But more than maybe anybody almost in this films, he takes me out because I always thought of him other than one flew over the cuckoo's nest. He was always a TV actor to me. And he was always a comic TV actor.

So when he appeared in a Bond movie, it really threw me. and that is Vincent Chiavelli in the world is not enough. I just, he's great in the movie, but it just is a scene that just feels so at odds with the rest of the movie. I don't know. How can anything feel at odds with any of that movie? I guess you're right. That movie's just at odds with everything else in the world.

What was his character's name? Doctor something, I don't remember. He died. not too long ago. He, Dr. No, he calls Stomper. Gupta? Is it Dr. Gupta?

No, that's Ricky J. Yes, that's Ricky Day. I'll look it up. Vincent Chiavelli. He plays, hold on, Dr. Kaufman. Oh, so perfectly bland.

Yeah. Kaufman. Yeah. Wow. He quite a character actor. I think a lot of people mostly remember him from Ghost. Yeah. That's it.

And I remember him from, wasn't he? I think he was in moonlighting too. But he was only 57 when he died. That's crazy, really? Yeah, he always seemed older. Wow. 4897. He was in, he was, 50.

he was 59 years old when he did tomorrow never dies no he died when he was 57 uh correct he was 49 years old he was the first digitally recreated actor what a weird choice all right we'll do it i guess we'll play that for the budget what's your number four man well you know it's someone who takes everybody out of this movie man i think i think i think you're going to agree with me yeah Albert Finney. Ah, yeah. As Kincaid in Skyfall. I considered it.

Yeah. Albert Finney is a great actor. Great actor. One of our greatest actors. But for some reason, his appearance in Skyfall makes me just see Albert Finney. And I just hear you and Steve Agee. Yeah, that's true. It's like, you know,

it's Albert Finney, so you're expecting the character to have more of a significant end or something? Because he just kind of peters out and disappears. I mean, he gets Emma across the lake, but... Emma! Girl of Great Lane, she still has

the secrets. Are all strange ways or whatever is. Aaron Brockovich. He's in Aaron. Rockovich, in case you're whatever. Yeah, he sure is. Okay, here's the game we're going to play with Albert Finney. Okay, when is he going to die?

It's a great game, but there will be no winner of that. I want to ask you the question, Matt. Yeah. He played Mr. Hardcastle in a TV movie called She Stoops to Conquer. It is his first? Based on a play. That's a, is that, who is that, that's, is that Moliere? Who is she stoops to conquer?

I don't know. What am I, a theater guy? Come on. I'll look it up. I'll look it up because I don't want you to know the answer to this question. Oliver Goldsmith. Oh, okay. That's not what I thought.

I thought it was like an old play. It is an old play. Okay. But it was written by Oliver Goldsmith. All right. My question to you is, is his first credited role? What year do you think? He played Mr. Hardcastle.

His first... Televisions? Albert Finney's first credited role. Hmm. I'll say 57. You are so close. 1956. Wow.

Great job, Matt. Thanks. I'm really impressed. By the way, this podcast is probably going to be our most popular episode of all time. No doubt. Because people are at home, what are they doing? They're playing the game. They're trying to shout these out.

They're trying to like yell it out at us. And we hear you right now. We hear you. You guys are doing a great job back home. Martin, Olivia, I hear you guys especially. Maurice? We hear you. We definitely hear you, Maurice.

You're the best. Next. All right. My number four. And this one isn't so much like, yeah, this person's great. It's more like, why did you put this person in when they're clearly have already gone insane? I can't wait to hear the answer. Michael Madsen, die another day.

Michael Madsen and die another day, of course. I think they're still trading. off reservoir dogs or something. I don't know what. Because they dress them in the same kind of suit. 9,000%. Michael Madsen in that movie, I mean, it's so clear that he's in there

for the future spin-off that they thought they were going to get. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I think you're right. Michael Madsen is also, I don't know if it's the material he given, it is the material he's given, because he's a terrible actor in that. But he doesn't

exactly elevate it. He doesn't care. He's not trying. That's what it is. Yeah, he is there for a paycheck. He doesn't want to be there. Um, fun, fun game we could play with Michael Madsen. Yeah. Matt? Yeah. I would like to know if you could tell me the amount of projects he has listed for 2018 that are either completed post-production or filming. And by the way, just

so maybe you can help you out a little bit with this guess. Michael Madsen has 282 credits on IMDB. Oh my God. Okay.

My guess is six and we will see none of them. They will not see the light of day. The answer is 10. Jesus. He has 10.

He's clearly going to do anything. Everything. By the way, post-production, completed, completed, completed, pre-production, post-production, post-production, filming, filming, filming, post. What are the titles of some of these? Oh, I don't know. How about a little movie called Dead on Time? Or a little movie called The Bend,

where he plays a character called Sheriff Keegan. Oh, wow. How about, how about, oh, here's a little movie. it is. Here's the piece de resistance of Michael Madsen's 2018 credits. I know what you're going to choose. He is in a film called Unbelievable with five exclamation points, and he is playing. President Ben Dover. Oh, my God. He's also in a movie called Spats with one exclamation mark, but three S's.

by the way just based on the poster of this movie I need to be there because it stars Tim Russ Chase Masterson

and Garrett Wang I don't know if you're familiar Matt but they are all Star Trek alumni no Tim Russ played Tuvok Chase Masterson was on Deep Space 9

and Garrett Wang was on Voyager and the tagline for this movie is a different kind of trek. And yet he still shows up in the hateful eight. Starring Gilbert Godfrey and Captain Kirk Stillwood. Now, judging from this picture I'm seeing, Captain Kirk Stillwood, Matt, is a marionette

puppet of Captain Kirk. Oh my God. I have to tell you, I watch some movie, you know, some friends of mine and I will often go perusing real religious action movies just to see what they are, just to see how they are, how they do, how did this happen? How did this get made? You know what I'm saying? Yeah, for sure. And there was one with Michael Madsen, Daryl Hannah, Stephen Baldwin. I can't remember who else is in this thing. I can't even remember what it's called. It's relatively recent. And it was all clearly shot in one warehouse in about 36 hours.

It's amazing. He's also in a movie from 2017 called Cobra Gator. Oh my God. Wow, that looks good. This is unbelievable. What I can't wrap my head around is Stephen Fawcett, who is the writer and director of the film, Unbelievable, with five exclamation points. Because his first credit is in 2018, and he had,

has listed five things that he's written. Okay. For 2018. Perfect Citizens, a TV movie. Noah's Room. The Archangels of Dreamland, which is in pre-production. And of course, unbelievable, which is in post-production. I'm going to take a look at his full biography.

There is nothing. He is a writer and director. And by the way, he looks like he is about Michael Madsen's age. Which is 50 but looks harder. A hard 50. Okay. Stephen Fawcett, I got a lot of questions for you. Please come on my podcast.

Matt and Dory's eggs. No, the podcast I'd like to start called, What the Fuck is Going On? I'll sit them down and I'll go, Stephen L. Fawcett, thanks for being on. First question, what the fuck is going on? How is this happening? Matt, that was a fun. Matt, what's your number three?

That was fun. My number three is, I feel like, might be on your list as well. Yeah. Jimmy Dean, aka Willard White in Diamonds or Forever. We can hold it until we get to it. All right. Yeah, that's right. In fact, I'm going to shuffle some numbers here, okay, but we're still holding that.

So I'm moving to number three. Yep. And I'm going to go. Denise Richards. Because I get what they were going for. Why didn't I think of that? Why didn't I think of that? Obviously, like, oh, she's one of the hottest, sexiest women of her time. But there has been no proof that she can act.

And I don't mean to disparage her, but she's just not a strong actress. And it really tanks this movie. I mean, it's just they knew they were casting a nuclear physicist. Yeah, yeah. And I'm not saying a beautiful woman can't be a nuclear physicist, but you need an actress that can act like a nuclear physicist. Or deliver the lines in a believable manner. That's what I mean. It's really...

She's the worst actress of all the Bond girls, wouldn't she say? That is tough because... Man with the Golden Gun pops into my head. Britt Eklund? Yeah. I still think she's at least got life behind her eyes. and in her delivery. You know what?

I accept. I accept that explanation. I don't like being mean and despair. No, no, no, no. No. Denise Richards, by the way, Denise Richards, fantastic in, in,

God, my brain is broken. Starship Troopers. She's fantastic and Star Trekers. She's great in Wild Things. She's, she can act. Amanda and I watched that recently. Oh. 15-year-old me said she was great in wild things.

Yeah, I think. I think current day you needs to see wild things again. Well, I mean, I, current day me is bonkers. Is inviting Matt Gortley to the newest screening of unbelievable, five exclamation. Because, quite frankly. You sure it's not unbelievable five? And that's the way they're marketing it because they've ran out of clever ways to do the sequels. Do you know what bums me out?

What? it's the it's the it's Star Trek actors me too and actresses that that wind up in these

fan films that have money oh yeah do you know what I mean like it bums me out are they you know they probably don't they don't

they don't care I mean they're going to go They're going to work. They probably have a little fun on the set, and they get a nice little paycheck. But it just does bum me out. By the way, this movie was shot and filmed in 2016, has not come out yet. And I found a thing that says, soon to be released, sci-fi parody film Unbelievable, the movie, crammed full of X Star Trek actors, including what looks to be a two-foot-tall James T. Kirk puppet. And there's a trailer for it.

in a in a aspect ratio i can only describe as fat iphone like it's an unrecognizable aspect ratio it has its own aspect ratio it's insane i oh my god i love if you even google unbelievable with five exclamation points it doesn't even come up oh my god matt this i i want to play the trailer for everybody but you've given this movie enough press please find it if you can. I don't know when it's coming out, but find it if you can. Back to Denise Richards. She also suffers from being part of the worst line in the history of James Bond.

That's true. The inspiration for it. Yeah. She also is just, I don't know, usually in a James Bond movie where like there's two female leads. you find yourself being on board with both of them. Yeah. Or at least one. Yeah, but this one with like Sophie Marceau and Denise Richards, it's just like...

Oh, that's the problem. The contrast is so great. Sofif So is such a good actress. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, do they have scenes together now? I don't... No, I don't think so.

I'm not sure. Maybe in passing. Tell me, James, do you still sleep with a gun under your pillow? That's Terry Hatcher, but anyway, I just wanted to say that. All right, we're into the final two, Matt. Final two. It's a little underwhelming because we already talked about him, but my number two was Wayne Newton.

Oh, okay. Wayne. All right. So we did talk about him, but... And I know for a fact that my number one will not be your number one, but continue. Well, I hope not, because I originally had Jimmy Dean at number one, but I moved him to number two, because number one for me is special.

So let's talk Jimmy Dean. He's my number two. We talked about him last week. I like him in the movie. It's just a crazy choice. I mean, he's supposed to be Howard Hughes, this character. And you put Jimmy Dean and Howard Hughes? I love it.

I love Jimmy Dean. He's so... We talked about it a lot last week, but he is... What I assume, his backstory. is, by the way, Willard White's backstory, is that he is an oil magnate who struck oil at the age of 12. Sausage magnet. He did like a paper route, right, and earned enough money to buy an acre.

I thought you were going to say his first oil, Derek. No, no. He bought an acre of land, and he drilled and found oil. Okay. And then from there, he just became an oil magnate at the age of 12. and you know he had a business acumen not seen in those parts for years and he just built it up and eventually bought a hotel in Vegas and also built moon rovers sure and were they now we didn't really get to the bottom of it last time but were they practicing with new spacesuit technology

or were they filming a moon landing? Yeah, that's right. We didn't talk about whether that was a fake moon landing thing. I think they're testing moon equipment, kind of like Elon Musk does or something, you know. Sure, on a soundstage. Okay. This is retroactively based on Elon Musk.

Elon Musk, of course, appears in Iron Man 2. Iron Man 2. Oh, that's right. All right, so Jimmy Dean, hey, good looking, what you got cooking? How about cooking some of that up for me? Come back to the five and dime. Now, Matt. It's time for number one.

It's time for number one. Now, my number one is my second actor from a movie. Oh, mine too. Well, I've had two doctor-nose, but. Okay. Actually, I have three people from my number one's movie. Oh, wow. Well, let me tell you.

My number one is from your favorite movie. My number one is actually, Willoughby Gray. Who played? Who played Dr. Mortar in view to a kill? The German scientist who injects everyone. You start with Vlad and end with Dr. or mortar and they're essentially the same person. I love it. Nice book ending. I just have to say, his, his, it's so over the top. He's so German. It's out of control.

Yes. The monocle. Yeah. The yelling and screaming. The, the, the, the shaking of the dynamite with a plan we know not what. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's. insane. Yeah. But, I mean, he's, yeah, I love it. It still makes sense to me because they're going like German mad scientist and that guy, I look at him and I go, German mad scientist. So let's quickly look him up and he's got to be dead. Oh, this is a great question, Matt. What year did Willoughby Gray pass away in? And how old do you think he was in the Middle Kill? Because I bet they aged him up a little. So I'll say he was 68 in that movie.

And I'll say he died at 77. Hmm. Okay. Okay. I'm going to say he was 60. I'm going to say he was 60. Lived a hard life. And I think he died.

When he died. I think he died at 62. Whoa. I think he died two years after that movie came out. Let's find out. Okay. Willoughby Gray. Oh, my goodness.

He is a John Willoughby Gray, member of the British Empire. He is an MBE. He's an actor. He passed away. Matt, in 1903. He was 76. I was one year off. Unbelievable.

So that means that he in he was 70 years old. old? Or, yeah. 85. Oh, sorry. 60 years old? Why are we so bad at math? I hate this kind of math. This is the worst kind of math. He died, he did Vue to a Kill. He was 70. Eight years, so he was 68.

What did I say? 66. What year of Vue to a kill? I'm like, 85? Or did I say 68? Yeah. Oh. Holy shit, he's the king and the princess bride. Oh, my God. What? And he's in solar babies.

No, he's in solar babies? Yeah, he sure is. But he is the king in Princess Brad. That makes sense. Let's see. Well, so why was he an actor just for, I mean, a member or a sir or whatever? What was he? He was an MBE.

So, I mean, you're not a knight. I wonder if he did something else, You're pretty fancy. Jeez. It's not like playing Morning Becomes Elektra in 1947, a TV miniseries in 1947. It's not like that. Learn them in MBE. Is that what you're telling me? That's pretty good, though.

Let's see. I'm going to see his full bio here. Princess Bride, Vue to a Kill, and Madame Boovery, is married to Felicia Gray. He died in 1993. Huh, I don't know. Okay. This was quite frankly the best episode we've ever done.

We still got one more. Oh my God, you're number one! That's right. This is great. Someone very dear to my heart, I've always loved him in these movies, or this movie specifically. Someone I've spoken to personally. Someone who I can't understand why he's cast other than he looks strange in a nice way. Uh-huh.

Putter Smith, from Diamond's All Forever. A jazz bassist. He becomes a gay hitman. And God bless him, he's just, his acting is, well, I mean, he's learning. It was his first movie. It's just such a strange thing, but it's so strange it works, especially next to Bruce Glover. What a one in a million casting combination that is.

It's really, Puttersmith, quite frankly, just seems like a lover, not a killer. You know what I mean? Yeah, he is. And his name's putter for crying out loud. He seems like someone who you would be okay on a road trip with, you know, like as the third guy. Yeah. He told me the origin of that nickname.

And I want to say it was because he had a little motorcycle when he was a kid that would just putter around all the time. That makes perfect sense. Yeah. That's amazing. Yeah. him and Glover in the same movie as a team. Yeah. It's bananas.

Yeah, it sure is. Let's see what old Bruce Glover is up to these days. I know we checked out his acting class last time, but what movies is he working on right? I forget Bruce Glover's in Chinatown. Right. But he's also in an untitled Crispin Hellion Glover project as Apollo slash old Brutus

scammerhead Um Hmm Ghost World I gotta tell you He does not Wow his first role is 1958

What is it Uncredited as a witness in The Verdict is yours Oh thank you Wow Well We did it There they are

20 or so. Only Jimmy Dean and Wayne Newton repeated. Which is interesting, they're both music stars. That's right. We had

and Putter Smith's a musician. I suppose you think James Dean is a Jimmy Dean is a sausage star to you. It's a sausage magnet but I know he's a country music star. We had Potter Smith

who's also a musician. VJ. Armitrage who's a sports person. Yeah. I guess Madonna. Let's see. I had actor, actor, musician, musician, actor, actor, actor, actor, actor, actor, actor, actor. A couple of MBEs in there.

That's right. But, you know, it's very exciting. Matt, if you could remind everyone what film it is we're watching next week. Oh, this is exciting. It's going to be just like the moon breaker goes. And quite frankly, I'm delighted I tricked you into saying that out loud because I had forgotten what movie we were watching next week. So everybody, we're going to return with Moonraker and, you know what, we didn't sign it off correctly. I'm going to say the following. James Bonding will return. James Bond, Pink Podcast, James Bond, Pink Podcast, James Bond, Pink Podcast, Man, Menn, Mad End, Mad End, Man, Man, Man,

Madgemonic Podcast Hey, this is Arnie Necamp from the Improft Fantasy podcast Hello from the Magic Tavern. I fell through a dimensional portal behind a Burger King in Chicago into the magical land of food and I started a podcast.

Season three has just begun with a brand new adventure to defeat the Dark Lord. If you're a new listener or you've fallen behind season three is a great jumping on point and we've got great guests like Justin McElroy.

I sat like a fancy college professor eight nuts. Rachel Bloom. You all see my collection of men, corpses, and one woman. Felicia Day and Colton Dunn. You've seen me have intercourse with a variety of species. It's a bummer. Andy Daly.

You have the members of Genesis listed. But Phil Collins has crossed out and then circledly cross out again. Yes, I have killed Phil Collins twice. Thomas Middletch. Jesus, I mean, Jarzos. Ruler of the eighth circle. And that's just the beginning. Season three of a Loaf from the Magic Tavern is out now.

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