JAR Media Posdact - A Strange One Henceforth - JARCast Episode 248

Episode Date: October 11, 2021

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/jar-media-store Twitter: https://twitter.com/FourFunnies PO Box: IHE PO Box 4268 CALNE SN11 7AY Timecodes: 00:00 Intro 05:06 WHERE IS HE? 07:21 Tarzans Love Life 15:52 Work Out Woes 36:03 Quitting The Smokes 54:25 Star Wars Anime 55:44 KFC Beans in Puerta Rico! 57:39 Raw Weetabix 1:00:42 JAR vs Wasps

Sorry, guys. This episode today is going to be terrible. There's no Alex. The jar energy is gone. The structure's gone. The funniness is gone. It's all gone. Funniness. Who are we? Who are we? Hi, jar media. You know, we're a couple of guys. I'm Jamie. So, who are you? I'm James. Nice to meet you Nice to meet you Jamie

You see I I want to first of all start this this ordinary episode Thanking our lovely patrons Over at Patreon And you know what

You know what People said that I was so against it But But Today we got a nice Lovely Today I'm drinking a nice

Lovely Mio Sparkling Saki and you've got a A cobra? You've got a nice cobra? Yeah, I'm drinking some snake. James says sake. James, give us a quick taste sort of overview of your...

What's the brand in that? So this brand is Mio. It's a Japanese sake and it's sparkling and it's only got 5%. It tastes more like a lemonade than a nice sake. Is it giving you smirnoff ice vibes? No, it is.

And I do like a smirn off ice. I like just downing the whole bottle. Yeah, straw peter. Yeah, that's the only, that's like the first where I got introduced to them. So it's like, I'll just walk in into your pub, your grand Michelin-starred pub. And I'll be like, Jamie, can I get a smirnoff ice so I can straw peter? We don't have smirnoff ice. Oh, yeah.

We used to. This was when you'd actually come and see me, but you don't. turn to do that anymore do you what have you you've got rid of them yeah there's no smirneys there's no smirneys in sight why i don't decide on whether we have smirneys or i thought you do i thought it was your pub bro i thought this is your your thing well if it's it whether it's my pub or not my pub or even a pub at all to be quite frank the smirney question is not one of my own choice. If the Smurney has been replaced,

what has it been replaced with? Water? Lemonade? Why would you ever do such a thing? I'm kind of... It's not up to me, it's not up to me. But listen, you're a sake connoisseur. I have.

I've had a few sarkays, and I didn't expect this one to be so light and easy. Because my experience of sarker is it's quite, strong. It's like quite strong. It's like you don't drink like a small bottle of this like easy. So you have a small amount. So I'm just surprised. Like a whiskey. Yeah, almost. It's like a rice whiskey. But this is like easy. I kind of didn't expect that. Because it's like I know people want to like that what that jarling wanted. They wanted to know what I'll. So I'm like trying to buy interesting alcohol drinks to drink on the car.

It doesn't have to be alcohol For the record, I don't think I think we always have a drink Yeah, but what's interesting about I'll have to them drinking some apple and wibina Or It could be Lipton Lipton's sausage iced tea

Flavour Yeah, but no, it's like But most of the time we've got alcohol Because we normally film on a weekend, on a weekday Yeah, we normally drink every day of the week With severe alcoholics, people don't realize this behind the cameras. No, this is the thing, this is one of the cultural phenomenons that I think Americans or anyone that isn't from the UK won't quite get. But for our society to function, we need at least 70% of our population to be at least 60% drunk.

At any given time. At all times. Like, why do you think these bottles, these water bottles are now becoming so. popular in the workplace. Because nobody's going to question your water bottle. Well, yeah, it says that it's, um, I don't know, what's a water brand? It's not a water bank, because it's just like a, the bottles we have. Oh, right, yeah, yeah, I see what you're saying.

Yeah, you can have anything in there. Yeah. As long as it looks like water, you're fine. And people aren't going to check. So you can just have it full filled with whatever plays in your life. Yeah, and this product that's got like a little, it smells like orange or something. So then it tastes of orange. Yeah.

You fill the thing with vodka. smells of orange to everyone things full of vodka only if you're drinking that every day you're 60% drunk at any given time so you can work and people aren't going to notice yeah I appreciate that

this is we're fucking geniuses bro I think some people are going to notice the lack of a certain someone yeah a certain somebody is not here today so there's been some pretty fucking bad news

yeah so Alex um is travelling coast to coast He's sort of He's on like a whole Indiana Jones thing Yeah he just messaged us a few days ago I'm just like I'm going guys I'm going exploring

Yeah I'm not going to see you for a long long time I'm going exploring and I want to find artefacts Yeah, that's all we know Yeah And you're now staying at his house Hence how we're recording this episode today Because we're in his house but he's just gone

he didn't even take the dogs he just dipped yeah so the dogs were alone in the house for three days yeah he had no communication

with us at all yeah pandemonium and now here we are we're having to do our first ever episode without Alex I've done an episode

without Alex without yeah you've done an episode without Alex no I haven't have you not have you not had Alex

how do you feel Do you feel vulnerable? Yeah, I feel this is a new experience and I don't know what could happen. I don't know what's on the corner of them. I don't know what's around the corner either. Yeah, I'm feeling somewhat uneasy and... Because of all the thing, Alex is like the...

He organises. He keeps us on the path on the tracks. Yeah, yeah. He keeps us organized, without him, chaos wanes. And of all episodes, there's never been a mean new episode. it's always been instead of me and Alex one or you and Alex

it's never been me and you so this is like we're breaking new ground here yeah uncharted territory yeah like we might after this you might not even need the air anymore while he's off adventuring because

JR media it's like this is the beginning do you reckon yeah full wheel bump him off yeah we can make it look like an accident as well James, tell me, do you think Tarzan had sex with gorillas? I thought we banned the guerrilla conversations.

You see, I thought we banned them. This is different. This isn't about guerrillas fighting or any such petty nonsense. Mike Tyson is not involved in this question. No, this is pure Tarzan. Tarzan, as in, I'm thinking the Disney Tarzan with Phil Collins. Did Tarzan... Can I just say that I don't know what Tarzan that is?

You don't... You don't know Disney Tarzan? No. Do you think I've watched Disney Tarzan? You know who Tarzan is, right? I know who Tarzan is, but... Okay, who's Tarzan? He wears like a...

How would I describe Tarzan? Yes. He swings on trees. He meets a fit babe in the jungle and he fights. Bro, I've not seen it. Don't make me try and describe it. How do you not know who Tarzan is? I know who Tarzan is.

Well, what's his story? Like, what's the guy? Okay, so Tarzan was stranded as a child on this island or whatever. And he got adopted by the monkeys. By the guerrillas. The gorillas. Exactly. And he became a gorilla.

He became a gorilla. but surely for him to be a true gorilla. He'd have to fuck, he'd have to prove his alphanus to the fellow guerrillas by taking their bitches. Yeah, that's what guerrillas do, right? Yeah, it's a fight. So if he was truly turned into a guerrilla,

do you think Disney Tarzan did that? That's straight at Beastie Allisie. It's Disney, though. What would Disney not do? For me to believe in this universe, me to, you know, like, for it to feel real, part of me says that he has to have done it. No, but if you're gonna, if you're gonna, if you're gonna, if you're gonna, if you're gonna, if you're gonna then there's other things you need to look into. Such as.

You think I had anything off that? No, but what's your answer? Do you think he did or do you think you think, do I think that Disney Tars and fuck Disney Gorillers? Fuck Disney Gorillars. well if no because you've got a question like do guerrillas masturbate do they masturbate like us so when they're in the jungle do they sit there and chub one out because if we're going to discuss that it's like we've got to identify the human characteristics in gorillas to know where the overlap is and what tarzan would have to adapt to We're trying to work out whether Tazan jerks off. Yeah.

You see that? I don't know. I have a feeling gorillas do masturbate. Because I've got the idea that it's like... If he can jerk off, he won't fuck the gorillas. Because in the wild, animals like dogs and shit. They don't masturbate. They just fuck.

Like, they skip the masturbation phase and they go straight to fucking... No, dogs masturbate. They find. like a toy or something male dogs I don't think I don't think that's master bayon it is why what

I think it's like a cushion I think it's then blue bowling themselves because there's no like climax like like fucking whatever they find

I don't I think they're blueballing themselves to put off the desires for like we've seen Argy he he doesn't have balls whatever Argy does

is purely malicious he's not controlled by his hormones then why would he try and rape paisley why is he so I don't know I don't know this is what I mean I think it's because Max had a thing for Argy so it's traumatized him and he's

he's putting his experience of trauma on Paisley yeah to make himself feel big and strong from this is reel it back reel it back Do gorillas masturbate? No, I generally believe they don't masturbate. For the record, neither of us are biologists.

We don't know. And we're not checking online to fact-check this. No, this is it. We're getting down to the nitty gritty here. We're going to work it out. I've seen videos of like chimps jerking off. I see, I think chimps are like the devious versions of apes. There are those like really horny chimps.

Yeah. No, they're the gooners. They generally just masturbate. all day. Yeah, yeah. They eat banana and just fuck themselves silly. Exactly. So that's quite a human characteristic. That is. I think... For an ape. Yeah. And guerrillas are apes. So I reckon they do. No, but I think it's like with the tree, with, let me put my sarke, my sparkling sarket down. Just call it sake. James, just call it sake. Okay, my sake down. So you've got the tree,

you've got the family tree where there's like the original like gorilla before, ape before the ape. And it has to like come down. to the different apes you've got I don't even know if it isn't it you got you got the chimps you got the fucking gooners and you got the the gorillas it's just like all all of the masturbation and sex genes went straight to the

the gooners and like clearly all of the alpha energy went to the gorillas I don't think the gorillas masturbate I just I think they they fuck which in which case if Tarzan is in the situation

and the environment where their only fucking, what is Tarzan going to do? But saying that, is masturbation a learned behavior? Is it a societal, like, expectation that you start jerking off? See, that's quite difficult, because it's like, I'm trying to think back to my own history, you know? I'm trying to think of... Yeah, like, why did I start masturbating? Because, like, when you're that young, you don't think about, like, it's portrayal in things,

like um masturbation it's not like a yeah you don't actually think about it so why do we start and i think that is just because we do sort of have to discover it yeah i don't know about you but like i i i don't think i would have come up with this on my own been like put two and two together yeah no but i think i did really yeah you started fucking your hand I didn't even do the hand It was just like, fuck anything You're like a dog You found a dolly

And say that proves it That dogs do masturbate I think you're What would this mean about the quillars I think the answer is Tarzan has sex with Had sex with gorillas But does Tarzan masturbate

Or does he just fuck? Oh that's But does he do them both or does he exclusively fuck? Because surely... If from your human experience of discovering masturbation, I think there's a chance that Tarzan didn't have sex with guerrillas. If he discovered that he only needed his hand, because I don't think he'd naturally be attracted to a gorilla.

No, because he's a human. Even if he thinks he's a gorilla. But if he thinks he's a gorilla, there's like societal sort of norms, the guerrilla society norm. sort of forcing him into the... The bestiality path? Yeah.

And it's his human being. His human self is pushing him down the... Yeah. Self-discovery path. Yeah, he sort of became a beta cuck among the gorillas. Around the alphas, he regressed into me and cuck. Yeah. See, I can't even argue with that.

I think that's... That's genuinely... Creschen that's baffled scientists for hundreds of years. What do guerrillas masturbate? It has been solved yet again by JARMedia. We're out here answering the fucking real questions. No, I've actually got a genuine criticism. Criticism?

A criticism, yes. So you know we both, Jim? Yeah. We both actually just work out on a regular basis. Neither of us are any, even on the, like, chart of like shredded, whipped. Okay No Like none of us are like that

Big Though we're not that muscular Yeah we're not like Cumao We're nowhere near Cumao No we're nowhere near And it's like We have like

The supplements You know the instant oats We have protein bars You know to help We're protein bars and shit To help help working out and it's like it's starting to dawn on me it's like the expectation of like

you know being shredded or whipped or whatever is actually so unbelievably ridiculous that I actually find it slightly because it's like when I say we work out regularly I work out every other day and on those days I stick to like a strict diet I'm only eating fruit

I'm eating things to help or you know for fitness and it's like I've not I'm not whipped or shredded and I've been doing it for like three two three months I've not hugely whipped and I know it takes time but it's like

I'm doing it quite often yet I'm not getting these results that kind of like the expectation put on people and I find that you look at Hollywood and it's all these guys that are whipped to fuck and it's like that's the expectation that's been put being put on people but it's like

I work out quite often and I'm nowhere near that to get that body you have to go 100% into the point it completely obsessive and controls your life. That's exactly it. It's got to be a 99% of the time thing. How much enjoyment

from life are you losing? Because I sort of had an epiphany. I was walking through Tesco. Yeah. Looking at stuff to buy and I was like, I've got to be healthy. I've got to be healthy. I want to reach this like body ideal of mine. Yeah, which is the same thing. Like when last night, for example, I was a gym day

I came back, we played some APEX and it was like, you know, Alex, being ill, being on adventure somewhere, it's like, you guys wanted to go to McDonald's. And I was like, strict on myself, it's just like, I've just jimmed, I don't want to do this. Because it's like, when you're putting on all that

calories and all that, it's just not good food. And I'm like, I was sitting there like just after the Apex match and I was just like, I want a fucking burger. I want fucking chips. It was just like, that part of me was like, no. And it's like, I took away my enjoyment of the night. because I went to the gym

and it's like that's that is an actual genuinely enjoyable part of my life that I've just skipped on just because I go to the gym yeah but even just like my thing in Tesco I was stood for legit

like 10 minutes in the sweets aisle the sweets is the worst and they're the most fucking enjoyable food yeah you just want to fucking nothing matches it nothing does but if you have like you want a bag of

sweets, right? Yeah, you want a bag of switch. And you want this perfect body, right? Well, you have your bag of sweets, that's you done for like two months. Because people don't, like, the sugar content in sweets is obscene. A bag

of sweets has like the amount of sugar you should have in a single day. And it's like, when you eat that entire bag, that's not, you're not feeling, feeling like super fulfilled. You're not feeling you're full. It's like you just has something enjoyable. Yeah. You've still got to eat all of this. buzz. Yeah. There's nothing like it

and when you don't have it, you really notice. Yeah. And it's like, you to get these obscene bodies, you have to cut all of that out. And we're talking about bodies here. Bodies don't just, you don't get to the perfect level and it stays like that. That's it. Once you've got that level, if you

dip, your body dips, you've got to stay at that consistent level forever. Yeah, that's such a good point because that's, it all comes down to how many, like, cheat days. you want to have and a normal person

living a normal life like you if you've just worked for five days fucking getting up early driving to work getting home at like 6, 7pm there's a long ass days

no no it is because I'm thinking about this through my routine because I don't I don't work super close by so my drive to work is like 40 minutes traffic and all that I get I leave at the house like what, 7.30,

and I drive to work, do a full fucking day, drive home, then I gym for an hour. By the time I'm getting home, we're touching like 7.30. And if you're gymming as well, you've got to fucking sleep a lot. Because if you're pushing your body through trying to gain muscle, if you're not sleeping properly, you're,

that's danger. Yeah, you're fucking yourself. Yeah, completely. And then you'll just crash really terribly. So it's like, you're going to have to go to bed at 10, which means on a, then you've got to cook as well. So, like, on that day, you've probably got one, or two hours to relax. Yeah. And if you're doing that five times a fucking day,

that's your fucking life. It's the gym. Yeah. And it's on me because it's like, I try to stick to that one every other day routine pretty strictly. But there's some days where I'm just so exhausted and I just don't feel like it. It's just like I can't do it because it's like my life is busy enough. I can't do this.

So it just makes me, I just hate the way that it's like this, oh, you can't. can do it if you work out often it's like no if you want to get these bodies you've got to work it's it's your life yeah it's got to be your passion and the reason i sort of disagree with that lifestyle for me is that sure like me if i got to a point where i looked fucking amazing like a a greek statue yeah he'll be like sick look back at all that time i've put in what have i been doing in that time period exercising and eating fucking boring food and then and then and then and then once you're at that peak if you want to keep that peak you've got to keep doing that forever basically yeah if you want to stay looking that way and even even once your body deteriorates you get old

you can't keep that shape when you're 60 70 so it's like you're working your weight you're using all of this time to get this body and yeah you might feel great of yourself but it's like, that's your life and eventually that body's, you're not going to have that body anymore. I think that's why we shouldn't strive to have bodies like that. No. I really... We should strive for personal

improvement. Yeah. Like, the reason I gym is like, it's 50% I want to be stronger because it's like I don't want to be reliant on my father when I'm working on my car. And that sounds a bit pathetic, but it's just like I've never had strength.

And it was actually the fucking moment that has made it worth it happened recently I was working on my car when I was out front I was fucking rusty bolts fucking difficult to get fucking undo right and it's like I tried and it's just like I can't do it, so on inside I was just like I'm dad I might need your hand

and I was just like no I'm going out again and I put some muscle into it and it happened they all done easy did it all myself and it was like major gains yeah and that's why I want to use muscle and it's like a complete utilitarian thing I just want to be stronger and the rest is like

fuck body dysmorphia because of these expectations that are like put on people and I really dislike it I really can't stand it and it's like nobody should feel shh

I don't want to take away from people that really get enjoyment no if jimming is just your hobby yeah if it's if you if you love doing that all the more that's your thing

it's like mean cars that's your enjoyment that's your thing yeah but if jimming were to be taking away from your time doing your passion like cars yeah that's a then i'm just because you're just because you want to be cummael you know then that's that's unhealthy yeah and it's like nobody should feel terrible about their body and be comparing themselves to these bodies that just aren't to camille to camel when it's like if you if you work like a normal fucking week you can't get that unless you are that's it that's your life hmm

And it just bothers me. Because I've had arguments for people online, because the whole Pudipi thing, where pictures of him Topplos came out and he was like, he was shredded. And it's like, I was just like, this isn't really possible for someone working a normal life. And this proper toxic guy was like, no, if you just fucking work, can't put some effort into it. It's like, no. That, no. It's so easy to say, like, oh, I'm going to do this, this and this. I'm going to get up at 6 a.m. every day and run for three hours.

then fucking lift weights for another three hours. It's no, but it's like the walks routine. He works out for like eight hours a fucking day. Yeah, and he's a minority in the, like, I mean, first of all, the majority of people can't just have that amount of time. No, and at the fact, he can only afford his diet because he's rich. Yeah, that's, he has an obscene diet and like, no fucking normal person could afford that.

No fucking normal average person can afford that. but then you go watch these movies and it's all people of his kind of bodies he's the star of the thing it's just like he's obscenely whipped and it's like that's not a good influence no because i know like the whole when it comes to like male versus female in terms of like you know body image it's it's a lot harder for females and it always has been for younger girls when they got these kim cut k's being the image yeah but i know with guys it's we've got the rock

yeah it's like it's difficult for different reasons I think, weirdly enough, this is somewhere where it's beginning to balance out, I reckon. Yeah, no, I think it's... For men, because it's like ever since Marvel movies, every single one of them has to have a six-pack. Yeah. Every single one. And how...

That was the standard for women, like, decades ago. Mm. And it's like, it... Now every man feels how women felt for decades. And it's like, that's, so it's like younger boys now, I can't say for certain, but they're surely being influenced by this to think that they need to have these obscene bodies. I'm being influenced by this. I am as well.

Hence why I'm gym so often? Because it's like, I have just just fucked body dysmorphia that I think I need to look a certain way when I don't. Like I'm much happier with my body, but it's just like it's still in the fucking right back that it's like, you need to do that. You need to fucking work out more. Yeah, it's very easy to look at. the mirror and sort of find these floors. Yeah.

It's like we I don't like the way that it's like that's the societal thing no matter what you look at, it's always these perfect people. You're always going to compare yourself to them because that's and it's like ridiculous and I don't think anyone should. Because even

if you do work out regularly like us it's like you're not going to become these people. Yeah. So even when you're doing the white thing it's like it creates that obsessive personality almost when even when you're doing it you're not becoming them which means you have to do it more and more and more yeah that's just like a none it's a never-ending battle that's what i mean by just look at yourself personal growth yeah you know and i can

look in the mirror and compare myself to a month ago and think well i look better yeah which is what I do because it's like I've been obscenely skinny and now I'm generally much happy with my body because I've got more weight to me and not just like weight as in stomach and fat because I did gain weight post losing a lot of weight because I used a lot of food supplements

because I needed to gain that weight. I needed those that 3,000 fucking calories a day just to get back, get back those lost stones but now it's just like I've got weight and muscle and that makes me happier but still it's like it's not enough and it's something I need to improve on and I feel it's something society needs

improve on because like instagram does nothing for any anybody instagram is is a blight on on fucking everything every every single app that is under the branch of facebook just cut them out of society improvements immediately yeah because it's like i use twitter i use instagram what i see on them both is completely fucking different and i follow the same content on fucking both that it's just Japanese cars on both. One of them I see people, and I see these bodies, the other one I don't. They're forcing this.

It's in the algorithm because it's... Yeah, there's money in it. Yeah, it generates money. You see this perfect person. You want to be them. How do I be them? Oh, drink these energy fuel fuels and shit. It's like, yeah, it's all about fucking...

It's all money. And all of these fucking fitness. people like I'll subscribe to my website and my Patreon and you can get exclusive tips on how to get this body and it's like you're fucking scamming people who are generally like vulnerable Mm-hmm. It's like fuck

you. Yeah there's no cheat codes. No just generally if you want to be fitter go to the gym just somewhat regularly and don't you don't have to do all this weight stuff you don't need to do what people say if you want to do cardio

and you want to ride bikes or do treadmill stuff. Do that. I do it. No shame in it. It's fucking good. Just do your best to eat healthy. Just be conscious of what you're eating. And then if you are craving a chocolate bar, you know what? Fuck it. No, it's like, it's like we, this is a genuine issue because it's like when we go to McDonald's, I'm generally, I'm so like, insecure. So I'm like, should I be eating this? And your thing is, it's just like, if you didn't go to the gym and you ate, this you still would have like

I would have eaten it either way yeah so it's like if you go to the gym and still eat it it's at least you're going to the gym you're still working it's a net positive yeah compared to a negative just a net fucking negative yeah because if you're just eating it anyways and it's just negative no matter what

so if you're going to the gym even because going to the gym is one thing changing your eating habits is a whole fucking other level and that's you know all of these proper buff people and these with people, it's all diet and all this. But it's like, your diet is like

your enjoyment in life. Yeah, definitely a part of it. The way I do my diet is just try to eat healthy, but it's like on the days I don't go to gym, I usually just trying to eat the way I like. Yeah. Like, but not in excess.

I won't sit there and eat a whole bag of sweets. That's the hardest thing. The other thing is buying a bag of sweets and not eating a whole thing. Yeah. And it's like I got gifted to like my mum just walked in and gave me a bag of Percy pig. Percy pigs obscenly fucking high in sugar

I don't think there's many streets that are higher they're fucking whammed for sugar and it was just like opened it had one

and then there's like a cupboard next to and I just threw them in the because if it's not in my mind yeah yeah and then it's like three weeks later I was like

oh the Percy pigs no that that's something I've learned about willpower is the like say every day you have a finite

amount of willpower yeah so walking through the shops, I swear to God, is designed to chip away at that willpower. No, it is. You're walking past, like, cookie day.

You're walking past, like, crisps and shit. To get to all this stuff, like, they'll put in the front of the shop, like, all these deals. Yeah, they'll be, it'll be like a whole... There's cheap coke. Yeah. And stuff. Always, always coke. Yeah. And that shit, that's, that's it.

Coat, if anything, is Coke. That's the thing that really just devils your health. And so, but it's like, I, I, know this and it's like when I go because sometimes you know I've got to go to I might need breakfast or lunch and it's like I'll drive to Big Tesco and I'll go in and it's just like I'm going

in and it's just like I'm not looking anything I'm looking straight and I'm just going exactly the route and I just go I get my coffee I go get to the protein and get my protein bar it's like if you stop if you fucking stop they're chipping away that you'll just power is going down and you're going to buy

something that you shouldn't have we know we know this because we go to saying speeds. Exactly, and we spend ages just walking through the aisles and the longer we're in there. Because we followed the path because the first big step is we walk past the Krispy Kreme wheelpower

fucking 90% gone. Immediately just like an axe to a tree just like chopping that shit down. There's a little stump left and then it's like, well, I'm buying cookies. Yeah, because it's is Krispy Kreme followed by like the pastries and then the cookies.

Yeah, and then the snacks exile and then the sweet style. Yeah. As you go through the shop, your willpower is just being fucking blitzed. Yeah. And it's like, there's so many times we walk in there and it's like, sometimes we don't even get to like the sweet salt because we've already caved

at the crispy cream mall. Yeah. And we put a whole 24 fucking box and we're sitting there ain't all of those fuckers. Yeah. Twelve fucking donuts just one after the other. And it's like, how many sugars in that fucking bad boy? Yeah. And it's like, we

We can't help it, and we are trying to be strict. So nobody else should be fucking expected to fucking have these obscene diets. Because the system, and you've got sweet foods are fucking cheap. You want to buy some chicken, yeah. You can buy three bags of sweet for the same price

as like some chicken. To be fair, vegetables are very cheap. Vegetables are very cheap, and that's why I try to. But they taste like dick. They do, too. They're fucking shit. My exact thing.

was you fucking get all these fucking veg and then stick a fuck ton of chili sauce on it because then it's like the shitty flavors like a bag of I've got this bag of garlic pepper for a fucking food just chuck it on half a bag

on one piece of broccoli just coat that makes it fucking edible but then that's not great because it's like that will have preservatives in or some shit and that all yeah probably yeah and that that also fucks it but it's like it makes it edible

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Good afternoon morning, evening all night Ladies and gentlemen Welcome to this episode of Ah This is the part of the show where we head over to Reddit and answer questions from Reddit at JAR Media slash Reddit You can go on the top friend where it says

Ask your questions to the JAR boys here And because Alex is adventuring away In Mesopotamia We're Jamie is the man choosing the questions this time So you might actually get good questions for once Because we know Alex just We know Alex just answers the ones he can answer That's brutal

It's the truth Okay It's the fucking truth I'm gonna start on a bit of a real one Do you think we can have real ones On this episode Have we not been too fucking will Jamie Too fucking will?

This is from grey tickles How is Jim's quitting smoking going Any advice? Yes If the jarlings don't know do you smoke I do and recently you did quit

I did quit and during that period I was doing everything I can to keep your mind occupied to make sure that you stuck it extremely helpful actually every day I was just like

we're going to say we're going to that crispy cream our boy yeah no this is the thing this goes back to the willpower we were talking about the first section for anyone that smokes or has

smoked will know nothing crushes willpower like smoking yeah like if you haven't had a cigarette willpower non-existent it's very difficult to actually even begin to imagine it because it's like

the way you've described the withdraws is just like really what the fuck that actually sounds fucking horrific I don't want to give any like I don't want to exaggerate it but it's it's just this it's a constant in your life once you start at least for me who has an addictive personality once you start it's there forever yeah and i i quit for four weeks a month

yeah which is which isn't a short amount of time that's a fucking long amount of time yeah felt like a long amount of time and but every day it's it's this routine thing and like you build up these associations and because human beings are inherently habitual yeah you fall into these even for someone like me who I don't have like a strict routine no but there are these constants and then one constant in your day

will remind you of once I finish doing this thing I normally have a cigarette yeah well I've driven for half an hour at the end of that I have a cigarette. Yeah. So your body's stuck in a routine and if it's not, if you don't do that routine. Yeah.

Your brain knows that something has changed. Add on top of that the, the withdrawal of, it's like short temper, just, I turn into like an outright asshole. I hate the person I am when I'm not smoking. See, I'm trying to think now. I can't actually think of. a time where I noticed that you were but that may be because it's me

maybe someone else might notice that you have a shorter temper the thing is almost the most important thing is the fact that I notice yeah so you can at least be like oh oh shit and it but it makes it even more frustrating because it's like something that wouldn't normally irritate me is really irritating me in this moment which is something I can relate to because I'm the same

with certain things as well but in that moment it's like okay, why is this really pissing me off? Oh, I haven't smoked in however long. I know this, but it's still really fucking pissing me off and I'm irate. I'm furious. And there's no, there's like,

how would you deal with that? What, if you needed to stop that, what would you do? Because the instant your body wants is just smoke. As soon as you're in that, you just smoke. This has, again, to the workout thing we were talking about eating.

Smoking satiates hunger. It makes you not as hungry. So if you're not smoking, you want to eat. Yeah. And which is what we did. It literally feels like a void inside of you. And you're just trying to fill it. And it's like the amount of caffeine I was drinking.

You were. When I wasn't smoking. Yeah, if it's not obvious enough already, I'm back to smoking. Because it's like, you said, during that period you were having a lot of CBD yeah because CBD helped because it's like when you're going to bed or you're going to sleep you can have CBD or you'll go about to go to work

have CBD and it's like that affects helps because it means you're not thinking about it or you're not getting that urge yeah yeah because if you're just knackered it's not like immediately in your mind to to like immediately in your mind to like immediately go for a cigarette

but yeah CBD did really help but then there's the thing of or the price of CBD CBD's not cheap and cigarettes not cheap for me to live happily using CBD as a replacement

for cigarettes equally as expensive if not more expensive than what I was spending on tobacco but we were when we were getting CBD we were going to Tesco at Sainsbury's and we were just buying the cans so that's not the most cough cost-effective way

because you can go to the, you can go to like a CBD shop and get CBD coffee or CBD tea where it's a lot more cost-effective and it's like you can get in a routine. Yeah, and it's like if you're using CBD as a replacement over the one to two-month period,

maybe for, if you're doing that for four to five months, I assume that gradually the, the nicotine hunger, the withdrawal will just pass if you're continuing to use CBD in that way in which case then you'd be able to reduce your CBD intake and then

you would level out you know this is just a case of finding a cost effective way to be able to stick to that routine yeah but it's not like it was just the cigarette just the CBD sorry that made me go back to smoking it's

it's this thing I'd never truly considered until you hear like serious addicts of like heroin and cocaine and stuff talking about what being an addict isn't like a you become an addict you

as a person you're you're an addict and I am an addict so my thing is that I just get hooked on something so you see it feels like you need a replacement so that you've got that that that void is being filled by something

yeah and it's like you can't really get addicted you can't mess with it you can't be like oh I'll just have one cigarette a week no I can't have one pack a week it's like it's all or nothing yeah it's it's a mind-boggling thing but in terms of device you did use Nixon power patches

yeah you definitely want to wean I definitely I've tried before just cold turkey I can barely go 24 hours no you shouldn't I think just from what I know it's like that's one of the things you don't do cold turkey on

like you can try to do cold you can do cold turkey pornography once again another highly addictive thing and that that can because you're not getting the same with your symptoms your brain is like you're being you're turning into a cum because your brain needs this stimulation needs this dopamine

but so you don't get the job with your systems in the same way as you do with cigarettes yeah but it it is similar

no it is and that's something I struggled with and I can relate to your struggles with trying to get away because it's just like the brain works

the same way with addictions the brain is doing this no matter what you're addicted to it's just doing little different things so I get it and I know it's so easy to relapse it is I have multiple times

I know you're back on smoking now and it's like you did go a month and I was so happy that you did go a month because it's just like with work you definitely can I have a hundred percent belief that you can eventually break free is just having the support system and the the lifestyle changes that will keep you away from cigarettes yeah you have to really want it that's honestly the best advice you have to truly want to quit yeah to quit and obviously I didn't truly want to yeah but I think

for whatever reason it's like with you know smoking I don't think you should be worrying about your health with it either all that much because we're still young it's like your health shouldn't be like a consideration and why you want to quit that's the annoying thing though because

I stopped smoking for a month and I noticeably felt better I could exercise for longer I was less out of breath you know I didn't have any smoker's cough whatsoever And then you go back to smoking

It's like, why the fuck do I do this? Yeah This shit sucks. Like it makes you stink. It stains your fingers. Yeah. I did notice your finger was much better when you went as well.

Yeah, the stain went away completely. Yeah. Yeah. If you're someone that's like recently started smoking, just drop that shit. Yeah. Because I know that one of the, You started smoking because of your work, didn't you?

Because I think your work was... It was like a work social sort of thing. Yeah. Like, everyone did it. Yeah, in that industry, everyone does it. I don't know a single person. That industry doesn't smoke. Because I know that industry because, you know,

my boss was in it and I was around it. And it's like, if you're young and you're close to people who smoke and you're like a teenager, fucking drop them. you shouldn't be smoking because friends are influencing you fuck that shit because if you're smoking at that age where the fuck are you getting that money to buy cigarettes that's a rough path it's like you know you can afford it

you know you have a job so but if you're being influenced by people when you're young you know get with it you don't need it you'll never need it don't fucking smoke just don't start like this is going to be discussed more in another video but I've had the temptation to smoke because I want that self-sabotaging

that self-destructive something to alleviate me of what's going on and it's like every time I've wanted to just walk down to test going to buy fags not fags, cigarettes you can call them fags, but English and every time it's just like there's something in me that's just like

no, don't because that one will become ten and then that's it I really I fight it I fight this urge to do it Because I know it is just... Yeah, I'm sure part of the reason I smoke is a self-destructive thing. Hmm.

Like, I don't know why, but it's like... It's almost like you have a bit of control. Yeah. You know? Over that destructive thing. It's your thing. Yeah. But then it makes you feel totally...

Terrible. Like out of control. Yeah. And, yeah. Just, if you are struggling with smoking, what I would probably do because you can't follow our advice because we're talking about your experience

so it's with it it's like it's different for everyone yeah don't follow my advice because I failed almost but it's like talk to someone you know who's quit because if they've got past it they can they know where all of the the challenges are

and then it's just looking to what you can do with your lifestyle that could help you and then go to nicotine patches have something like CBD if that helps exercise more whatever might help you do that instead of just

trying to go cold turkey and failing because then you'll just feel bad about yourself you know yeah that that is another thing as well that if you do relapse don't beat yourself up yeah because at the end of day it's a highly addictive substance that has millions of people addicted you don't need to

person that has failed in doing this this time and that you can always try again yeah you can try again for you try you'll just constantly try again until it works you can't you can't get away from it

unless you fail you kind of have to fail to be able to get past it yeah because my mum was a smoker for a long time she was I remember when we were younger yeah smoking all the time yeah um and she quit like two years ago

so she's sort of been the voice of reason like when I've been getting down on myself over this whole thing yeah she's been like one month is the time she would always fail when quitting yeah because it's not like you just say well I'm quitting I'm a strong person I can do this

you know which is the kind of shit I'd say to myself like when I would try and go cold turkey there's just shit I've said to myself this? No, no, that I don't need this is something I've repeated to myself so fucking much. I don't need porn, I don't need it. And it's like one one player, oops.

Yeah. No, just once you, one month is like, I don't know if it's like statistically proven or whatever, but it's like, that one month is like when it's really difficult. I think it's, it's so easy to. It's when in your head, you're like, yep, I've won. Yeah, now I can dabble, now I can just dip back in. That's it.

And then jump back out. Yeah, but. That's not the truth. No, you dip in and you sink to the fucking bomb. And then you're doing it all over again. Yeah. You can't dip at all. There's no dipping.

Yeah, don't dip your toe. Why dip your toe? Just fucking... That shit's scolding hot. Yeah. You're going to get burnt. See, that's what it comes down to. See, we are the fucking...

We are real, woo. Yeah, see, I said we could get real. Okay, let's move on to... That is actually really hard subjects. It's one we've never talked about. Yeah, I've always intentionally... We've never ever talked about cigarettes or any type of... like addiction like that to that level you've talked about that porn yeah i've talked yeah because

i i i want to be a good influence and it's just like i don't want to be a bad influence no we're not telling you to smoke here don't we are telling you to watch porn watch porn instead of smoking yeah get that addiction and then quit that addiction afterwards see here's the thing if you if you if you if you just goon you don't need to smoke because you're fucking just gooning all night what's you're gooning while smoking see no that's that's how they do it they replenish their gooning stamina by smoking yeah exactly makes them impotent too okay here's one from richard the lesbian richard the lesbian richard the lesbian what prehistoric animals do you boys think would make the most interesting cuisine this is a

question for Alex I don't know a single fucking prehistoric animal you don't know a single prehistoric animal would you want to eat a T-Rex nah I feel hasn't it been like disgust that they would not be tasty. No, but if they turned into birds, chickens the most delicious meat there is. Yeah, but we're talking about birds then. The prehistoric birds. Well, no, dinosaurs.

They evolved into birds. Yeah, but those birds around that same time, right? Yeah? Yeah, so those probably tasted fucking great. They were huge as well. I'm watching the amount of birds you can get from that. Did they have, like, normal birds? See, this is what happens when Alex isn't here.

we talk about prehistoric animals and we're just like, yeah, the pigeons probably tasted really nice. Because if it was Alex, the question be over because you just say one thing, you'd be like, this bird, this should have tasted lovely. The Thai Rocha,

Savannah kicks. The Pythagoras and Fagoras. The Pythagoras Rex. Tasted really good. I heard it tastes like beef. This is not our special to Euremia. Terodact tools would taste bad. Yeah, I think.

Yeah, I get like a kind of mussely kind of tendony tendony, yeah, tendony type of feel sinewy, yeah, stringy meat. What's the big one with the long neck? The seraphopatis. That one, that one probably tastes pretty

decent, it's huge. You might as me if you can get from that. No, imagine, like, cavemen taking one of them down. Fuck me, they'd be fucking... That's the whole county... That's how, like, um, like, celebration events started. It's like, once they conquered one of them, it was like they parted. That's how Christmas started.

They took one of them. killed a woolly mammoth and it was like well no gifting the meat is this is your gift and they're just fucking buying getting making new coats and shitting gloves

but I'm going to say Neanderthal probably tasted um dodo isn't the dodo prehistoric or did we make no no that's historic because we hunted it to extinction

which you've discussed before they were probably the best tasting bird They wouldn't be hunted to extinction if they weren't tasty Well, it depends how desperate they were Well, no, it depends how tasty they are We would have exterminated chickens

If we didn't learn to battery farm them I don't like where this is going That's so fucking dark, holy shit James defending battery farming Who would have thought The battery farming episode I'm going to read the first line of this one Oh then we're going to judge to see if it's like

No but we can cut all of these questions I'll remember Oh yeah I'll be cutting the majority of that whole first bit is gone Ah ha ha ha The underscore goad In defence of Star Wars visions Oh no Bracket trigger warning for James This isn't a trigger warning for me

Okay, that's the first line. Do you want me, this is a big question, but... Bro, we only saw three episodes and we only watched... Star Wars Visions has been the result of a rather interesting journey. George Lucas started briefly in a few interviews, or stated, sorry, briefly in a few interviews. It was a fan of anime. Of course he is. But it wasn't until Disney bought Star Wars that an anime was greenlit. They found a studio, but because Disney is such a cumbersome corporation,

their organization broke down and it never happened. Bro, just don't, don't, just don't continue this question. Um, at the end he says there's an English dub. Opinions? Who watches fucking dubbed anime? It's like playing the Yakuza game dubbed. The fuck! No, I'm generally in the, very firmly in the sub, sub, sub, sub, sub, sub, sub, sub, sub, sub.

If, if you're not in the sub, then you're, I'm not even going to go there. Yeah, we're not even going to go there. We're not going to go that, though. Fontingo says about beans on KFC. Puerto Rico actually... I saw this. Has had red beans on KFC that go with white rice for years now.

Red, white, pink, and red beans are super common. And a huge part of Puerto Rican cuisine. Apparently, you lose this one, James. I don't remember what you said about beans with KFC. I said that bean goes with KFC But did you say that beans With KFC are specifically English Or British

No but I'm not talking about beans I'm talking about bait beans It's like a completely different genre Because beans That sounds like a fucking good KFC Puerto Rican KFC Sounds fucking banging I'm not talking about Puerto Rican

KFC I'm talking about bait beans How weird is it that we say Like Puerto Rican Kentucky fried chicken why i thought i thought the point of fast food is it's supposed to be universal yeah i think it should be i think i think if if like japan kFC comes up with this new thing for that month every kFC in the whole world should have that thing yeah it's not fair that we're being depraved of japanese kFC the english versions of mcdonalds and kFC are

fucking bland and boring we don't get any of the excited It's only ever beans. That's the only thing they ever do differently is add beans. Yeah, that's it. Baked fucking beans. We've had enough beans.

We baked bean, Britain. Yeah, we're beaned Britain. We don't need any more beans on our fucking fast food. I swear if Nando start having beans, like baked beans, that's it.

I'm flipping. I'm losing the plot. The plot I lost. The beans you gained. I ain't gaining no beans, bro. No beans. Rice Fury says, you mentioned Wheatabix without milk in a recent cast.

And I'm wondering if anyone else has actually had these as a snack. You don't... I don't do it anymore. But as a kid, I have memories of grabbing a bisque or two and munching down when I wanted a snack. And there was nothing better. No, I did the same. I did the same because in my house there was like a lack of food.

But there was always... That's pretty bleak. Yeah, but... It's all bleak. But I knew where the Wheatabix were. Hmm. And it's just like, if I want food, it's just like you're in for such a miserable time

trying to swallow and exist while we can that Wheatabix block. Because these are mini... I'm not talking about mini ones. I'm talking about the fucking huge ones. Yeah. Like the size of my forearm. Yeah, they're fucking huge. And I used to have them.

And then it was just like, we were in your garden one day. and it was just like, oh, let's fucking do the Wheatibix challenge, so I just... No, it was, um, John. John was big into the dry wheatobics. Yeah, so me and he and me both stood down. It was just like, who can eat them with the quickest?

We both stuck these two huge... And it was agonizing. Yeah, it just sucks all moisture from your mouth. But, but the bits of wheatabics also combined with the liquid in your mouth to make a paste. So you've got two. blocks in your mouth who's pasting at the back.

Yeah, and you have no liquid in your mouth, so you're trying to swallow this, like, slightly moist paste that's mostly just dry and spiky. Yeah. And then you can't... It gets to the point when you can't breathe.

It just fucking... You spit it out. Yeah, you can't... Yeah. You just breathe. Dust. Yeah, dust. Wheatabix is sawdust.

It is fucking sawdust. And you know what? It tastes horrible. Because it's not sweetened. It's too. Just fucking sawdust. It tastes like sawdust, and I've had sawdust. It's the most...

You see, that this is another one of those things that I just associate with British food. Brown. Bage. Bage sawdust. It's not even brown. It's beige. Bage is better than brown, though. Not in terms of food.

Are you sure? Brown beef. Brown... Chocolate. Brown... Brown... Brownie? Brown...

Yeah, but when we talk about brown British foods, we're not talking about brownie or chocolate. What's a nice beige food? You got Wheatabix. Special K is nice. I'll give you that. Special K is curry. No, that's like...

You know, curry can be beige. Cornwall is quite beige. What colour can't curry be? That's why curry is good because it can be every colour. Exactly. I agree. It's the, it's the gayest food. It doesn't limit itself into the beige, the beige.

Here's one from a Matty Woo 98. Highjar, between a combat knife and a pistol, which weapon do you think would be better suited to fend off a swarm of wasps? Hmm. Swam of wasps? Yeah. Can I just pick an option that's run away?

Run away? So what gun... What gun... What gun is... Are we talking about here? A... Is this a 9mm just a pistol? A pistol.

Let's say a cult. Seven shots. No, realistically, a bullet can only take out one wasp. Unless they're lined up and you get like a... a collateral. Do you not think there'd be quite a lot of turbulence from air from the airflow? And it might put

them off. I'm going with a gun over a knife. Yeah, you're not going to fucking... You're not going to slice a wasp. No, because it'll see that shit coming. Yeah, easy. It's not going to see a fucking bullet. The air displacement of moving your hand with the knife is going to blow it out of the way.

Yeah, a bullet. A gun, you can just bang, bang, bang. Yeah. Because if you do seven shots One after the other Because if you shoot once and then leave it The was gonna move And they're gonna go towards you So you've got a fucking blast seven shots straight

Hmm What if it's like a cowboy six shooter Hmm Found the hammer Yeah I can just do that No I get a gun anytime We agree What pepper spray though would be the actual answer

If that was it Pepper spray some wasps But they'd be fucking dead Pepper spray I don't know why it's not I don't know why it's illegal Pepper spray in the UK has the same is the same crime as holding an actual pistol

An actual gun Yeah they're on the same level And I find that ridiculous Because it's like I'm awful pepper spray being legal Because if a creepy man approaches you just fucking pepper spray that bitch Fuck him up The last question will come from

Chaz the Lemon, favorite MacDamako album. Fuck you. I'm fucking quizzing the JA podcast. Fuck MacDemarco. Fuck you. Ah!