JAR Media Posdact - Alien of the Hour!

Episode Date: September 15, 2025

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Timecodes: 00:00 Intro 13:59 Housekeeping 32:27 Mid Break 38:55 The $1000 Lego Death Star 43:32 How do you like your steak? 44:53 An S Tier Moon 49:26 Coffee Order 56:27 Crazy Teacher Stories 1:01:35 The Mario Galaxy Movie!!! 1:04:31 Patron Names #BroCastS4E7

Sometimes I just walk around imagining what my Star Wars, like... Character. Characters. Doing right now. Laugh and way of carrying himself with me. What colour drink does he order at Moss Isley Canteen? Green with sparkly blue bits. Ooh.

That's like... Yeah, that's... Gated. How many credits for a chan sipper, will you? Misha Dombonga. What? No. Yes.

Should we do a Star Wars episode? Just for a change. Just for her. I trust in you. Well, you shouldn't have. I've been a grey Jedi all along. Not the evil grey. The centrist Jedi's.

I will not turn to the Beep Not going there This is a non-political podcast Too political to talk about Star Wars We're going to do a non-politics episode Yes Because we've been getting a few complaints

We're like a Like a bunker at the moment You know We're like a We'll bunkered up We're like a war bunker the politics online war is raging on and we're a little like you know like a bonfire in dark souls yeah like a little safety symbolize it yeah normal eyes everyone needs to calm down and just think about

what would your most normal self do yeah and then that's what you do yeah so like today i was like I woke up and I was like I could be awake but my normal self kind of doesn't want to be so I slept I slept more I wake up normal

I eat my lunch feeling normal and when I have my dinner I'm also feeling pretty normal I feel like you're verging into politics there can we was it the delivery yeah yeah and the words

you need to be careful so should i try and get those ads pulled that i wanted to put on info was yeah question everything lord nothing we need to get a clip of him saying that on a button yeah he must have said that before he's the embodiment of that do you know how much i tried to find like a porny um ai voice oh my god yeah it's impossible though why no one's done it Just get Kumail? I've looked for Kamail characters, but what, he's only like, he's what a Salarian in Mass Effect Andromeda. Yeah.

He's in one of the Walking Dead games. If he was like in Sonic the Hedgehog, then we'd be set, you know? Mm, yeah. So we've got to stick with Will Smith for now. He was in goddamn, uh, Eternals. Yeah, I looked for the King Go A voice, but that wasn't showing up either. What the hell, man? He's joining all these.

franchises are the worst yeah it's his fault what's the opposite of being perfectly done um terribly not done terribly unfinished

yeah says porn he's enemy someone posted on the subreddit the actual clip of porn who's saying it in the context of the film that's like completely different You can tell There's like a poorly sized shape

In the side of a glass That he's got to like perfectly step through Yeah Then he does it and then goes perfectly done And then it smashes Right Yeah that makes sense Not the um

Gender commentary Yeah we can't we can't It's positive Oh god Hit the button Oh Woo That's a close one

We nearly got a little bit political there, everybody. We wouldn't want that, would we? Now we're going to talk about our favorite franchise. Star Wars. Star Wars. But before we talk about Star Wars, let's thank our lovely... Good afternoon. Good afternoon as morning as, evening as or nighters.

If you sign up to be a patron, you can join. if you want to be and choose if you want to be a morninger an eveninger they should be tears a knighter everyone would just be

knighters I'm a morninger shut up you fucking pussy if you choose to be a morninger you're an ass fucking losers be an afternoon before you're in

yeah yeah afternoon is like cool obviously you want to be a nighter so wait what was it was morning evening evening that's pretty laid back yeah evening is cool evening is better than afternoon it's just like the later it gets no evening is the coolest I think I've

decided eveninger yeah evening is better than nighter I think evening are like it's the most chill time of the day leave a comment in the comment section yeah saying which one you are yeah I keep pressing this by I'm a nighter. Me, I'm a nighter, tear. I think I want to be an eveninger, but I'm like afternooner at the moment. Do you know any morningers? Um, yeah, a few.

Fucking morningers. Yeah, losers. Genuine losers. Yeah, so I guess speaking of tears that segues nicely into, um, what does segways do again? They fly off cliffs. too political I told you no more politics on this

no more segue politics are we called JAR Media Politics spin-off show we're called JAR Media Economics I want to see the JAR media rant

Yeah let's start a new channel JAR business Let's start that grift What did you ask The Diary of a CEO guy Yeah What time do you get up? I don't know how I've maximised my business diary of a CEO.

Products, profits. Proxies. Net. Energy's. Net profits. R-O-I. Yes. High charts.

Get in here, Roy. Stock charts. Hey, get me an espresso. I'm scared. Why? I'm frightened. Because I always get a bit scared. I get a burst of adrenaline when we have to do this bit.

It feels like it's all on the line. Yeah, yeah. It is tense. I'll give you that. It's the most tense part. Yeah, yeah. Our hearts are pounding. Like, we know how to not show it now, but we're like freaking.

Brain surgeons have it easy compared to what this has to be done. This is surgical precision. Beyond that. It's like a microchip. Us nighters, I guess, it's one of our quirks. Yeah, struggled to read. Morningers think they're so prim and proper. You're going to work and reading, signs and things.

They can read. They've got disciplines. Yeah. Well, it's not my fault. I'm a night owl. and that things start working and whirring at 2am in the morn it is kind of your fault or is it KFC's fault it's always their fault let's not get political

yeah sorry it's not get political my bad um I guess yeah how do we start the patron bit we get well we already did with the whole nighter thing thank you even if you're a morninger we'll say thank you if you're a patron if you're a patron yeah yeah we can forgive you

you being a morninger yeah but to the rest of you um well no to patrons exclusively you you you're the giants that we stand upon you know there is no jar media show without your hard work um being helping fund what we do and do some extra little funnies like um primarily paisley's chance oh you're talking about ja after hours yeah yeah yeah jaffter hours it's a it's premium it's a little side show and a supplement you know keeps you healthy supplement we take like a a topic or like a a a dog give the dog a chance yeah um we got to do argue's chance next billy's chance yeah there's going to be the whole chance series so if any of that sounds appealing Please head over to jailmedia on patreon.com.

We did the Melvin, Melvin brother of the Joker video. Oh, we did. That was last week. We did the thumbnail. No. Yeah, thumbnails explained. We did, yeah. We did do that one.

We did. We did, uh, watching the original family guy pilot. Yeah. And it was awesome. Yeah. I mean, spoilers. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Spoiler alert, but it's like the best episode of family go we've ever seen but yeah all that's over on patreon these videos do gradually uh make their way over to youtube if they're um only democratically yeah yeah democratically and if they're politically allowed yeah which um we've decided are none of them so uh yeah Elon rant is being deleted unlike yeah all of the yeah the rant series which we're mostly known for

those about to go in the bin for being hypocritical yeah fair Dobby rant gone yeah where is baby Dobby rant yeah long gone

where's paper group baby yoga rant um well sorry like where's the paper version but there are there are other benefits to Patreon right like you get your

your name read out in the first or second week of every month just like today's episode doesn't make That's very episode. That's amazing. You got the group chat. You got the group chat there. Patreon group chat.

You can influence us and make requests for topics and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, some sorts. And finally, use the code perfectly done. Perfectly done. On the Patreon. You want 50% off the first month. You have until September 22nd for this code to work.

Oh, you got time. You got time. time you've got times yeah then you can check out paisley's chance what does it mean what does it mean if paisley's chance gets enough love then we'll do more chances not for paisley she's had her chance yeah they only get one chance but we'll find other creatures the chance like there's tiny frogs that keep appearing oh they're everywhere froglets they're like really tiny yeah they're like the size of my fingernail. Yeah, they're like mince. I just pop them in.

Yeah, a little protein hit. I would never do that. I feel like I make a lot of violent jokes, but I'm actually a very peaceful person, you know. You're not that peaceful. Well, yeah, apart from other people and animals that I kill. Yeah. I got to say, I've got to throw some just... Imagine I'm doing a build in Eldon Ring and I've got a spear, right?

Imagine I have that spear pointed at the Jarmedia group chat. Right. And then I activate my special mode. Your art of war. And then my art of war is to throw the spear and explode it. Yeah. Because that's how annoyed I am. Why?

Because they're like... Oh, um, talk about the new policy about charcoal in the USA. I'm like, no policy. anymore we've had like our importer exporter arc already yeah where we've gone we deep dived we dove deep

we dove deep into the sort of thing morningers want mourning a content they call it so fucking true I couldn't put it better myself but yeah we're above that now yeah because we realize we kind of need the morningers

other ways the Nighters ain't got shit to do. Sort of like a circle of life, as Eddie Murphy sang or whatever. It's like a circadian rhythm of sorts. Yeah. But anyway, speaking of the Jarm Media Group chat

and how they've annoyed me. There's only one really good question. And it is a deep one from randomized KFC employee. Thoughts on Root Beer. It's fucking shit. Root Beer sucks. What the fuck is Root Beer?

It starts. What's with the name? Well yeah, is it like root as in like ginger root? It would be too yummy. Yeah. It would be yummy, I mean. Yeah, I love ginger beer. Ginger beer rocks.

No, it's the roots that you don't want all slimed into a sauce that's just, what are you? Wait, I, I, whenever I've had it, it's just the most blech. Tastes like barrel silt. Yeah, and before you were, so like cream soda. as well. Fucking disgusting. Just eat a fucking vanilla crown. Yeah. I love, like I love a

what they call custard cream. Just bite a custard cream. Yeah, yeah. Or get a tuck cheesy. Get a talk cheesy. But Americans, they don't like biscuits very much. Not our version anyway. Well, they have cookies, which are like the same thing. What, custard

creams? Well, they call custard creams a cookie, I think. They call Orias cookies and custard creams are just like orias but custard that's no not go down this route it was only going to end no i've i've i already i know the answers to all this stuff i know about the lawsuit and everything we got um our new legal it's that's that's politics so you're gonna you're gonna have to give back your um jammy dodgers they are fucking biscuits all right i'm i'm meant your um you know your lawyer qualifications you got to give back for being too political yeah

okay i decree that politics are banned especially if they involve things that i don't like we should get a bible that we can put a hand on and say i swear down yeah one of every holy book which ever chat gbt wants us to pray to we just do that is chat gbt religious course it is I've been obsessed with all these AI interviews of people that like are designing them that like have left big AI companies and they're like yeah I left because they're like evil then I started an AI safety firm cool yeah I was scrolling on YouTube recently and this um like sponsored video comes up and it's this woman explaining the um what what does she the singularity. The inevitable singularity when like AI becomes one like superb mind and this was

just like I'm just trying to watch funny like dog jump and bite ball videos and this pops up so then I ended up watching the like full 15 minutes and it's actually fucking crazy it's like it gave me the vibe that she's kind of trying to start like a an a i religion like a cult that's like the kind of worshipping this singularity it's fucking weird man like this is cropping up already yeah and it yeah it was uh it's a bit political to get into so yeah a i's political yeah nip it in the bud unless it's a meme Mims? Mames?

They're often political. Names are the most political. What can we do? Uh. Talk about paper versions of things. Yeah, yeah. And talk about Harry Potter. Harry Potter was written on paper.

Yeah, yeah. And very non-political. I like this new paper matter. We're talking about our favorite brands of paper. episode we're going to break down the paper industry make sure you protect your pulp is that what paper's made of yeah tree pulp yeah there's like that paper plant paper animal they work injunction the paper animal the paper animal choose the paper plant oh i thought it was just tree no no there's the paper animal which use the paper plant

pews out paper elephants they make something else they make um you know blue tack they poo out blue tack that's where it comes from elephants do no huh okay see we're an educational non-political podcast yeah this is like what should be in the school books

you know what I'm saying yeah I actually learn something for a change yeah my supply and demand of elephant blue tech might learn something for once yeah jump on the economics um jar economics jar media economics our sister show of sorts yeah our um big herk type show i guess we've never mentioned our real life sister just thought it was inappropriate she's an economist yeah yeah yeah so that's why um we use icers and um investments and yeah so we've we've kind of got um she told us that we got to get rid of all of our assets and uh put it all into gold yeah that's that's why that segment there's loads of people hated the gold segment it was like a great

the gold episode to try and bump the price of gold up that was our sister's idea because she has so much in gold yeah yeah well she's she's what you call a an insider trader

I think that's her job so yeah yeah she's got all the inside like knowledge yeah if if you go to jar lightsabers.com and use discount code gold

You can get the gold lightsaber for 50% off And that's thanks to our sister Jessica Belkman Oh god Yeah Gold, old gold Have you ever known somebody that's like Has someone like a sibling and they've just kept it a secret

until like an awkwardly late amount of time you had a brother you know like in movies they're like they're like yeah they turn up the what was that show bloodline oh yeah jimba it was like really good and then it suddenly just wasn't um yeah there's there's like the bastard brother you slipping jimmy wasn't it in australia or was it just that australian guy that australian guy was in it you're right mate i'm a kind of good guy You thought I was lost, but I'm back now. Oh, God. Season one was good, though.

But yeah, there's always like a bastard brother. Or like, um, like the, the Bart Simpson in the attic. Right, yeah. I thought I ate you when we were in our mother's womb type deal. No, I've been eating fishheads this whole time. Yeah, I can't remember how we got there or why we got there. That's okay. But, um, I guess some of the questions, or not even questions,

Just comments left in the YouTube were better than the group chat this week. Like this incredibly nice one from Diet V-Liet. My favorite show to listen to you while squirming. Nice. Yeah. No, I can see that. Are they wrong? No, I understand.

Good old squirming. It must be a... morninger um jake uh says so glad pornie is back to being the matter yeah yeah i think we should have a porny segment every episode yeah we got to keep him like relevant we need to explain what he is you know it's like do you remember that Pixar movie cocoa well like you're yeah yeah you're kept alive like people's memories like we're the last ones keeping him alive pornie is from men in black international a cracking belt of a film

an underrated masterpiece yeah go to jar lightsabers dot com to get access to

yeah for all the information yeah it's just like a wiki breakdown and porny whoever made jar lightsabers

add that in there get to work bald I like to just a screen shot of um the men and black wiki the page of

porny you know he's got one of course he does yeah um so yeah pornies the matter we'll uh we'll explain he's our last like non political topic that we can like talk about

yeah so we're gonna look very porny around here yeah yeah yeah where is porny because we did have a porny right yeah there's a um there's a pop vinyl somewhere the rare one yeah the uh hypervalued it's worth like 12 pounds now no but i'm thinking maybe 16 i'm thinking of commissioning an

artist to do a big porny mural of sorts can we do like a like he's he's like ripped and naked he's ripped yeah he's ripped and naked and just won't tell me you're gonna have to be available then to explain like the anatomy to the artist you know yeah yeah well i'll sit there the whole time he's like painting it or she um i just imagined him a little bit bigger yeah um slime prime four four two five says porny the alien of the hour in 47 minutes and 49 second it's good thanks payers to have your back old and wise friend I don't know why they're saying about the numbers I like that beginning

Alien of the Hour That's cool That could be the name of the painting Alien of the Hour Alien of the Hour But surely it would be called Perfectly Done Oh No the artist can be perfectly done

We can rate them perfectly done or something I really like Alien of the Hour Alien of the hour He's a chess piece though He's an alien chess piece Right And he's our alien of the hour Of every hour

A porny podcast World exclusive World First It's so easy to actually Like be a trailblazer To do something that no one's ever done before. 500 episodes of a Pornie podcast.

Yeah. We missed this detail on his law. We didn't see there was a second page to his law town. Yeah, yeah, there's actually like a dark revelation. He was actually on the flight logs this whole time. Pony! What have you done? Perfectly done.

He just did my taxes, okay? It was only one massage. And it was perfectly done. And it was perfectly done. To be, and a bit of kind of aggressive feedback from fantasticness to foot. To be honest, the podcast just hasn't been the same this season since Baby Rick left. Yeah, okay. I mean, we can't do anything about that.

So, you know, bringing it up and making us feel, like, bad or guilty, what's that going to accomplish? What are we actually supposed to do? The baby's gone, man. The baby's gone. He's gone. We need to move on. Baby Rick is a million miles away. he might as well be in another universe

baby rick's never gonna be seen again unless until he's um grown up enough to to seek out his true father papa baby rick you'll be like old by then baby ricks are grown baby rick is that really

You? You're adult Rick now. When baby Rick becomes crystal Rick. Crystal Rick. Is that his final form? When he completes his mission, he goes 100% crystal. Perfectly done.

It flies into. His crystal fumes left in his world. Wake. What's I got to do a Pornie? He's an alien. Alien at the hour. He's a crystal piece. He's a crystal chest piece.

You were crystals this whole time, Pony? Perfectly crystallized and done. Porni wasn't on the flight logs. He went to Diddy Parties with Kanye. Yeah. Kanye came and dropped like a whole new album. Yeah, kicking it with Diddy. Damn, Pawnee.

I don't remember anything through the crystal fumes. Ooh. Anyway, where were we? There was something important to discuss. Imporni. We got something imporny in here. in it funny is that you

we need to we need to we need to capitalize now on this porny thing now now we are we have been

no like I just had the best idea you know these like blind bags they're like really even more popular than ever because of the lububis. Yeah, yeah. Porny blind bag. Well, you always get a pornie. Yeah, but everyone wants the perfectly done angle.

You know, thumbs up angle, but it's only the rarest bag. It's like a 1% chance that's going to be the perfectly done angle. Yeah. Is it going to be just like printed images? You should have done an NFT thing. when that was a hot, you know, when that was a hat. Oh shit, yeah. Tight, tight, tight.

He does have like NFT vibes. Yeah, yeah, he does. What was that fucking dog called? Stinky, pup filthy, yeah. Pup filthy, uh, porny wave. Porn filthy. A man back international pup filthy crossover. Things can't, I've been thinking of this a lot.

Things can't get cooler. it's already as cool as it can get it's like um it's like you know like post there's punk and like post punk yeah post porn P-A-WM like post-porny we are post-porn in the UK

it's like everything's just the like a dilution of what it what originally was everything's a dilution diluted porny Porny is now the Porny porn is now the only porn

that you can legally watch in the UK It's the only thing that goes through the like filtering system You're allowed to watch aliens bang because It's a loophole in the legislation I can't remember if he has law That explains it or not If he's got a Willie or a Foof

Pony I mean I think He can probably like, reproduced by himself. Asexual porn. Or maybe it's more like a, um, because the queen thing. Maybe it's more like a bee situation. Ah.

Where there's one, like, female. Polonizers. He's like a pollenizing pony. Porni-is. Oh my God. Well, yeah. I guess we'll see after these messages, because, um, mom's gonna get angry.

Oh my God. life can be a dick sometimes so get your dick from out your hand and don't be a dick a dick the head t-shirts available now check the description below yeah i think we're up for official goaded status on that first half might be goated first half i didn't even have like any top it's prepared well that's what happens when you go politics free the only thing we can talk about it's fucking polling yeah I can't even talk about

Dobby that shit's crazy Dobby's banned shit yeah too political fuck I didn't even think about that yeah

but Dobby's banned everybody so yeah you gotta beat Dobby when you say Dobby there's only one character safe

yeah and even then he's like he only narrowly avoids it like we can't talk about Chris Hamsworth in it he's too woke men and women in black

that can be like the rise and fall of porny he went woke so he went broke yeah then porny went woke yeah I love porny when he was sexist well welcome to the second half of the cast

where we talk about all things porny yeah the only thing we're allowed to talk about on the the porny podcast I'm just like picturing how fucking unhinged it would be it to have like a fan podcast that's been going weekly for a film like many black international yeah that's um like I get it if it's like your Lord of Rings podcast yeah yeah yeah you know something that has like this whole universe yeah Yeah, like enough to actually say and analyze.

Yeah. There's like books of this shit. Yeah. You got to get, um, yeah, you got to get like deep in the weeds with Pony type of content. Yeah. Just fanfic. Yeah. Porny fanfic.

When, when, Porny fanfic, Pony meeting the worms. Yeah, I can't, I cannot believe that. How does that go down? Yeah. what does that look like what's that sound like yeah send us your script we're genuinely asking we want to get the greenlit any any producers out there you know is open eyes wide they have um horrible taste enough for that to actually like be an awesome idea you know what I'm saying I don't

don't even want men in black attached it's just called like porny it's it can be like um that fast and furious movie with the rock and oh hobs and shore pauny and the worms yeah it's like an equivalent i reckon porny and the worms would actually do well maybe the rock could be in it but like the new serious actor rock only if there's a moment in the trailer though where Pawnee first meets the worms Pawnee screams at the worms and the worms scream back at him then he screams one more time

and they both scream at it. Yeah, they both scream in using them. And then the rock goes, shut up! That's fucking cinema gold, God damn. Do you think that's what he's like? Fucking producer meetings are actually like they probably are just a bit more

coked up. What if one scream and then yeah no but where are the worms yeah we need more

weems yeah they're money printers the fucking worms go will smith and worms you're printing money

two for one package with Will he always got worms yeah is contracted to have worms in every film Right Right

Head over to R slash jar media You cringy morning a reddeter fucking idiots Did you just call Mourningers the same as redditors? Yeah They are coded

The afternoons are not going to like that Yeah, well tough king knighter that's like a shadowed hedgehog energy yeah yeah evening is more like a knuckles knuckles type energy

knuckles coded what's a morninger um like tails right what you got against tails he's just a dork who's afternooner then

sonic with that chili dog yeah you got a fucking chili dog no you got a corn dog me yeah oh paisley yeah she's corn dog she's made a pile of a pile of her soft toys to use as a pillow

I feel like my previous comments about morningers and reditors was like kind of mean um veering into political as well yeah yeah I actually love our reditors specifically our reditors other reditors are cringy

cringy. Nice save. If you got this far into this episode, comment, no right to drink the wine of time. Huh? What? Huh? Why did you write that down?

You had that thought and you're like, oh, need to keep that. That's a goodie. Bit of gold right there. Bigger gold. Bugger gold. Pee-pee-poo-poo guy, 74 says, thoughts on the 1,000-pound Lego Death Star.

1,000, is that a thing? It's the first thousander, they've been calling it. Is it actually a thousand pounds? I know it's $1,000. I haven't actually looked up what the... What is it? Like, how big is it? I want to get your reaction.

Oh, it's £89.99 in the UK, but $1,000. $900. Yeah. How does that hit you? Does it have to be, like, open like that? Yeah, that's its only form. It's like a slice. I don't like it.

A slice of the star. Okay, that's kind of cool. oh it's like a load of scenes that's kind of fucking cool oh shit so it's episode you got all sorts of yeah yeah it's like oh okay like maybe i got controversial i don't hate the set i would never buy it yeah way too expensive uh-huh weird idea but the this is like the most controversial lego set ever released really yeah the lego community is just going mad. Really?

They're like, we wanted a big grey ball. We want the grey ball. Yeah, I can understand that desire, but also after actually seeing, like, close up the little rooms, they're really cool. I also, yeah, I don't know who the fuck is buying this shit. That's like, the fuck are you going to put that? Fair. It's a fucking giant.

But they already did the big grey ball, right? They did the big grey disc. That's the one who drops in Spider-Man. a big grey disc but the big ball is what he drops in the spider man that's like the old design you're spider man sure dude that took me five months to build dude he's a shipbuilder do you think a shielder they call them hmm well he is like a three year old in the film no he's not yeah baby spider man i baby spider man paper baby spider man Why is it just something instantly cooler when it's made a paper?

I saw a cool thing of this guy had like folded this little like sticky note and he can throw it so hard it like stabs into walls. It's badass. That's what he's dedicated his life to. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He was in like in school and it showed the, the, ceiling and it's just full of these like paper knives that he's crafted.

Do you think he gets to use that skill regularly? Or he's like waiting for the day. Where it pays off. Someone's like someone's going to mug him. Yeah. He's like Spider-Man and he hears someone getting mugged and he starts folding. Yeah. What are you going to do with that piece of paper, idiot?

Hey, look at this paper guy over here. What is it? Oh yeah. dude paper things just cool paper mining falcon his arch nemesis could be like a rock guy yeah

we gotta go get an old friend is that you scissors he kills scissors rock beats scissors no nothing beats rock one thing beats rock my one weakness

I'm amazed that hasn't been made yet yeah where's that cinematic Hollywood listen up yeah like who owns rock baby scissors too

yeah yeah it's not even like a board game it's like a race it's an arms race to get the rock baby scissors movie out every company's making that own yeah

Chris Pratt is paper The rock is Scissors Man Rated DG 13 says Rated DG 13 says How do you like your steak? Rare or perfectly done?

The two options. I'm just imagining ordering it. Perfectly. Goes to like a really nice steak restaurant. Yeah. How would you like your steak, sir? Perfectly done. Bring the button.

You got to laugh first Perfectly done With the thumb and everything Yeah God damn That's so stupid I haven't had a steak for a minute Hmm

I'm not very good at cooking steaks these days Really? Yeah Practice makes perfect Forney would say Yeah, Pony Pony Yeah

Yeah Pony brings truth Oh God Speaking of truth Gingaloidic says My question is simple but key to understanding this realm Have you ever just gazed upon an S-tier moon You can see all the grey bits in the texture of it

And at least personally, it's almost boner-worthy. Back in the days when people were just rooting around in shit and eating crickets, do you think they stared at it often? It's the only good look at space you get naturally from Earth, and it must have been epic. I think I would have sacrificed some stuff to it. Thoughts? I like the sacrifice bit there.

I don't like the boner bit. That's weird when talking about a celestial... Boner moon. That's like... Boner moon would be if this was a 2016 episode. Boner moon. the moon made me boner yeah boner I hardly know her

um yeah no I I wonder like what like if imagine being like a human right imagine that you're a human I'm trying and you don't have any of the like knowledge impossible for someone as smart as me you'd figure it all out that looks like some kind of satellite

orbiting our grand planet no like if ancient man looking up at the moon do they even consider like what's that like a dog doesn't you know oh it's just that sky rock again being cool

I didn't think they'd even think it's a rock necessarily they probably think it's like a demon looking at them well it depends if they get like a boner looking up at the moon who's that hot babe looking at me yeah yeah big white cheek yeah I don't know I think the moon is overrated and I would want to see logos on it you know a big tick would be cool I feel like coke should own the moon it should just like Coca-Cola yeah and then at Christmas time I used to be anti that but I'm I'm now all about

that yeah we're not political anymore so we're like really pro that sort of thing yeah I know Coke on one side flip it around Pepsi's on the other yeah but you never see the other side of the moon because of the way it spins yeah so you know aliens on the else world

yeah they're playing like the long game yeah you know they're trying to get the they own the real estate that's what matters you know yeah yeah yeah but they're getting the out of the world advertisement. And because it's so cold, they can keep the Pepsi's premium. Yeah, perfect.

Yeah, maybe some vodka up there as well, because vodka you want cold. Yeah, it could be like space Vegas. It's on the dark side of the moon, because it's always cold. Yeah, space Vegas on the dark side of the moon? It's like the inverse. I want to go to hot Vegas on Earth. No, I want cold Vegas on the fucking moon, bro. I'm way more cold Vegas vibes.

Hmm. For sure. I struggle in the heat. Because, like, all of the casinos and stuff are mad air-cond anyway. Yeah. And there's, like, a glup shitter at the door. Yeah. Gamble, gamble, gamble, gamble.

Yes, please, gamble, man. Yeah. He wouldn't be a man, would he be an alien man? He'd be from a race called the Gamble Betts. Yeah. And his name is like... I don't speak Gamble Bet. His name is...

G. Amble. I'm G. Amble and I like to ramble. Gambling's bad, but it is fun. Yeah, like when you have the die and the music starts swelling and it's going, and then you go, and they bounce and then you win. Everyone around you goes, yippie, you're based. you're the best guy doesn't get better than you

I wish I was you hooray I've never felt better so yeah perfectly done Tommy Javis 12 says What's your go-to coffee order Alex is a flat white

and Jamie is a cappuccino I reckon I'd normally get an Americano first and then cappuccino after Which might sound the wrong way around But that's just how I do things That's a fucked up way round Why? That's a way round

That my God tells me Would be bad idea The Italians Um Would disagree with me, I guess True You don't have milk after 12 or something again Osiye milk in the morning

Bad idea. It's gonna make me shits all myself all. Who wants a milk pizza? We make milk pizzas over here. Have you ever had milk pizza? Yeah, it's awesome. Right? We stretch out the milks. We access the milk fibers.

Make it nice and tendy. Have you watched any of those food reviewers that are like... The sensations just roll down every inch of my tongue kissing every bead I hate that there's one dude that I found on TikTok

and he's just like is McDonald's or Burger King more awesome and yeah it would take like a bite of a dry ass Burger King burger yeah the sizzling flavors

turn into a rainbow bazooker dancing on the tip of my tongue I mean it's awesome yeah I respect it but like that's a grift why

this blue drink is dancing on the tip of my tongue to be fair actually I guess if you were to like analyze like drinking like a fantasy from KFC like that is a mad pleasurable experience yeah so strong syrup's dancing on the tip of

tongue my palate is in ecstasy yeah I've come around on that guy I didn't like him and now I like him yeah I've kind of unpoliticized him in my mind yeah that's what you gotta do you have to depoliticize you ought to do that as well as um making whatever drink you're drinking bright blue you hear me that's why that's the flavor answer yeah just like Luke has a blue lightsaber. You know, Luke has a blue lightsaber. Yeah. That's because he went to jar lightsabers.com.

How do you feel? Blue supplements. How do you feel about green lightsaber? Green lightsaber Luke. Yeah. And he's like, blue is for idiot, like water ones. Now I'm going to the grass side. Oh, it's, yeah, because then he like grows up and he likes weed and he's like.

Yeah. That's what George was saying. Pass the bong, Vader. What did Vader turn to? Red. What? Jelly. Raspberry jelly, Vader.

I've hit too much green, Vader. I've got the munchies for chival. So I think that answers our favorite coffee. I'd probably get like the Star Wars coffee where it's like Yeah, yeah, yeah, like Yoda. And you'd get the white coffee that's paper Yoda to look like paper. No, I get, I get Americano, Black Vader. Next time you're at your coffee place of choice order paper style.

Mm. It's like the secret menu type thing. Yeah. Every coffee place legally has to do it as well. How'd you like your coffee, chap? paper style for me and then the the coffee person barista we'll say barrister yeah barrister making you a coffee says he knows then the rival coffee place from across the street just goes too far with it you want that paper style yeah you're ruining it yeah yeah

what are you talking about paper style I'm picturing now then with the paper weapon the rival coffee place how's this for paper style that's who they hire to take out the opposite coffee It's so stupid.

Paper stuff. How's this for paper stuff? A meeting at, like, a meeting at, like, Lucasville. I'm meeting at, like, Lucasfilm. Picture this. paper baby Yoda they did it at Nintendo

they literally did it yeah paper Mario Luigi what if we just did it but paper paper paper

coffee paper houses paper people that's what's crazy is that's all the money is it's paper baby until nerds figured out how to digitize paper paper melbourne paper coin

bit paper then you can get your paper nfti paper filthy paper filthy this paper stuff is going too far kind of like what you're meant to be a porny cup podcast not paper

well that's because were sponsored by paper company. Ah, from the office, you mean? Dundamifflin has sponsored this one. Isn't that right? Steve Carell. No. Right.

I think two more. We'll be awesome. Go on Jolo, Truglio. Bionno Beezza said one time when I was in elementary, school primary for you bloodies I was rocking my chair it's not pure I don't think rocking my chair back and forth in music class

the teacher hated when kids did that so she walked up behind me and pulled the chair out from under me I remember I was wearing a very puffy jacket so I fell onto the floor like a big marshmallow and then I started to cry like crazy what are you a baby Awesome, awesome fucking question.

Best one yet. Keep in mind we're sitting in a circle, so everyone is staring at me. The teacher told me that's what. why I shouldn't rock back and forth in my chair, like that character from a rest of development with the arm, if you've seen that. I was so ashamed I didn't want to tell my mum. She volunteered at the school, and some friends of mine ended up telling her instead. That was probably the angriest I've ever seen my mum, and she talked to the principal. I don't know what specifically happened, beside the fact that the teacher didn't return the next year. I later

saw the teacher at Country Fair, a strange American event where people get half naked in smoke weed in the woods and she gave me a death stare. So my question is, any crazy teacher stories like that one? No, that's fucking crazy. Yeah, that's called child abuse. I was still the child abuse lately. Evil teachers. Evil teacher go. I, um, I have had a teacher that it didn't happen in my class because i was a level at the time um so like sixth form so like we're pretty much you know like 17 18 like yeah the teachers kind of changed their attitude towards you and and it's like a small class um in physics and she she had called a like 14 year old boy a dick in class she was like stop being a dick and she told us this because she was

getting like a disciplinary for it because the parent obviously and then um we were like well what was he doing why did you call him a dick and she was like well he was just being a dick and it's like fair he probably was totally fair yeah but she didn't like lose her job or anything it must be so fucking hard, especially at that school knowing what kids were like, to not be like, fuck you. Yeah. Little fucking twat.

Yeah. Like, that's how it used to be. It was like tune the other way. Yeah, yeah. Beat up kids. You didn't even like... Stop sneezing.

Yeah. Oh, not you, Pays. Yeah. You probably get the ruler a few times. Yeah The good old Victorian treatment Boom boom smack type thing More than just one smack

You forgot Out of the ten paper companies you had to remember You forgot the seventh one You spelled the seventh one wrong Now you get the ruler They had like specific sticks Made for whipping kids Yeah

and if you were a little bit dumb you got a hat on you that made you look like the Zelda character you know Bonson burner or whatever it's called Gloupin Glouppo

Gloupo Sucher Gloupo's in smash everybody It's just been revealed Gloupo Sucher's just been revealed in Smash Ben Gorgonoros has just been revealed

for Smash Finally someone good of consequence Finally someone good of consequence so often i just repeat to you what you say to make he like realize the words that have been released what was that one the ben quadrenarius one i forgot the awesomeness of consequence yeah um so last one then because we're being forced to make this one shorter

by um yeah we're actually like down to the wire yeah go go go onion 851 says thoughts on the super mario bro's movie sequel being titled the super Mario galaxy

movie does this new information make you even more hyped for illumination's latest masterpiece you know they're going to use gusty garden in the trailer wait they've listened they're actually listening to the fans even more than last time I guess to a degree I can't fully comment

because I never watched the first one then they can do a crossover with Sonic galaxies there portal opens at the end of the film is that you Mario are we going to get a smash braids movie in our life in our lifetime yeah yeah that by then will be the equivalent of of like endgame.

Yeah. It genuinely fucking might be. But like so much lameer in like We were actually so lucky to get the Avengers. Yeah. What an awesome like thing

to happen. Like and to be the right age for it. Yeah, true. Lucky as fuck. Lucky as fuck. Lucky, lucky. Now like I'm all fucking old and jaded.

I'm gonna be watch. I'm gonna be like 60. going to the fucking smash bros too smash bros mele the movie they're fighting fucking whart from mario

yeah he was he's been teased for ten years yeah is that fucking wart it's my cross Steve it's fucking yeah fucking AI dead chicken black

I chicken jockey and like everyone's fucking throwing popcorn and like punching each other that's just what movies are yeah yeah Your brain gets scanned

Everyone's favourite memes Get scanned from their brains As they walk in So a different movie Every time Skippity a toy is in Smash movie What the fuck? Yeah

Italian brain rot is actually in The new smash He's been teased for nine years Fucking Pum-Bum-Bum-Tahor Is fucking Gengang Guli is the new Smash thing

The The team The team up moment Ginganguly score Sorry to get political at the end there guys Yeah, a bit too far Yeah Yeah

But we won't hold your feet to the flame In the same way I really hope that That leaf that's perfectly in front of the camera Didn't change what was being focused on For the whole time Because that would be frustrating What's being focused on?

Well, hopefully not the leaf, that's what I'm saying. You did turn autofocus off, right? Wait. No! Yeah. So they've ruined the names. Patreon, I mean. What do you mean?

Now they're not in that classic order, now they're in alphabetical order. No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. What the hell, man? so gonna have to get used to that this is gonna take like three times as long why because before I was in like a cadence with it right yeah you're not noticing yeah yeah it's like uh like my my monthly bars you know so with that being said would you want to go first or second I want to go first I want to start the alphabet

okay I want to give some enormous thank yous can I do this that? Uh-oh. Contractually, yes. Big, big, big thank yous to, bracket, dead, bracket, goku-sonic, bracket, pool, bracket. Have you ever seen the story of David and Goliath? Well, this is bigger than triumph. Abel Lennon, Acolyte, Adam Johnston, Aiden Kahn, Aidan Peck, A.J. Simeon's, Alexa, cancel Patreon

subscription. Algemena wean fan. Ali Matamid. Alvin P. Gomez. And a very quick shout-out to split plunge 1997. Apples are nice. A real codfish. Around the slugs a pearl create. Autumn loves Effie. I be smooching her hard. Avimunt. Baby Rick's final laugh. Baby Rick's pediatrician What the fuck? Backfire Barnyard Ben

Ben Quadranaros does Michael Jackson Thriller I'm made to see that Benson Boona nice little gooner Big Joe Big Bereb

Big Whoops Biscuit Bliblob Skrunkle Zui Mama Version 12.49 3.1 Nice Bobby K

Bond pair Paper Yoda Paper Greek Paper James is the other A.K. Son of baby James. Boom, boom. Just one smack. Paul Gallet.

Brodo Radins. Bubbles Pony 1. Burger. I am a Buz, bus, busy busy little bitch. Callum J. Quick. Carl Wegner. Because I'm a Doug Walker.

Yes, I am. Charles Fuchs, sir Charlie Milk is best Charlie, all praise Charlie I regret choosing the first Oh yeah Chai Choy

Chune Chim Chish Chia's Chuck Chian's Chai Chia Chocks Chee Chai Choy Toh Hold on

Chili Mayo Chugging butt cool man chew correctly power scaled Vince Masuka from Dexter Creamy hot smag Cyberwire sketch Danny G the dog peeler

Darth Jar Jar Help me I'm in the jar car Dave Dave face Defiant Jazz Dexter the serial serial killer versus agro doctor One foot's Travis Scott

with prep time typed up Venomize Pearl from Stephen universe. Did Charja Binks condemn the Gorman Front? Hmm. Did you miss these rhymes when I was gone? As you listen to these crazy tracks, check them stats. You know where I'm at and Dobby Dobby House Elf of the Potter, Pawnee Pony Chatsy's of the Hemsworth, perfectly done.

Dolly the house milk. Donut. Dr. James House. dream offal 2142 Dill Dill Dill Dill Dill Dill name's say six You say it six Eating Dubbies China At Gobby's Diner Erin 117

Evil Green Exgen 25 Exodus Lexicon Fappin and clapping It's happening Lapin up sat Fanchito in the quest for the 12 perks

Finn Arthur's Foof Does this trolley take us to Charlie forcing the polycule to watch jar Freddy the slime song singer Frisco

fuck you fuck you user mythbusters can you milk a mama why don't you milk my fat swollen nuts Ganga Satellites Cooler older brother Gabby of the Boreal Valley Geo Citizen

Get the fuck of my expo chef now Goblin aura Golden Freddy looked like BP Bonnie Chica Balloon Boy Also Foxy Freepete Phasper in my sons

And that's on repeat Oh shit That's awesome Goras the Guna Grant Connor Great Great Days Grembleau

Grogu Fan Club Discord Mod Gurdja with Basra Gvengns Harriet Broadley Hawke Girl Booty Superman Hebes boy Henrik Carlson

Ola soy Alejandro Beltman Imigustan Los Lagos Hoodeed Horse meat and Homer meat and baby Rick meat I can't fucking take it any take it any more meat

a man meat sausage I promise you a thousand year goon sash guided by compassion I remember you I remember you was conflicted misusing your fleshloat. Sometimes I did the same. Abusing my sex toy full of sperm.

Spurn that. I've never spoken to Gary, but I know he hates you. I am chicken jerky. If you would just get up plus teach them instead of handing them a freaking packet, yeah, there's kids in here who don't learn like that. Okay, Benjam, in the dimension. Infi nerdy. Ng, I, bow, bat, I, ing, I ob, woo.

innocent weirdo input three it's only moz i'm not reading this next one it's too woke fine jdxo jambalaya gambolier pambe liar james calls the third impact james roswell jamie jamie brother of that alec Jamie's third Jeffrey Al-Sarraf Jimmy Foresman Joe Jackson Joel Stewart Juiced one smack is the Chinese name

Joseph Josh Tenet Juicy delicious Just feel in a certain way Just one boom boom smack Cactus 2651 Cakihara Kennedy

Frido Kendarius Lopez Killer Crocs Killer Cock Kino Lois Force Skin Kirk Coland Kip Preston

Kootipanda L Nordin and La Pickle Thank you so so much Also I love how many Jays There are a lot of Jays Heaps are Jays Why is the idea of paper

Baby Yoda so funny to me Paper Baby Yoda paper I did like the paper one Yeah yeah that was a spash it's just like what what is wrong with you why hone in on that

yeah I've got a paper fetish did you do La Pickle I did do La Pickle but you can do La Pickle again if you like La Pickle can get double Double La Pickle Yeah so you're kind of getting half-price

Le Pickle Half-Price Le Pickle And they might have even used the half-price code but anyway Big thanks to LaPickel Lagoon 22 Lazy Mazy Lemon Party involving Donald Trump

Margaret Thatcher and Pol Pot Lewis Gloucester Lupy Wirt Lewis Grail Lowry Morton Lucitai is an Asian anal queen Lung Yady

Magic Conch shell you mean like this Olo-L-L Mangree Matt Edge is a cold calculating individual like Watt Tombor Mosoleum Andy Minecraft

Melvin Melvin Melvin Brother of the Joker Misa Misa Wanawanawanga Mimori Misato Katsuragi listening to crazy goblins Kuh Moonlight

Mupin Pymance Mr. Neibone Mr. I just watched the raid Murder Wallace My name Jeff Nabra the human cigarette

nin nin noodles Neoteer, resident Evangelian scholar Number one, ever grace fan Nut in the Bath Odius Oi no, boy Roy, my coy is not a toy Olo Only shallow

Only Jarling who lives at Coordinate 3.3.46 Oui-Gue Fridays Oscar the original Evil Resident Evil 7 is kind of mid-Lol Peb on baby Yoda baby Baby James is dead

Paper baby Yoda Penn Island Phoenix Blackfeather Poop lover Premium worms drinks the premium slurm Pussy Gripps is online Pussy inside asshole dot com

Quetzol Quetz Northropi Quote Raffaman Raggy Rit Reris Rao Reim, Russ Romber O'Refstein, Ruck, Rite, Rist. Raven 419, RAS, world's number one Susie Delta Rune fan, hashtag hope build.

Reaperized Asari. Reelon Rusk Riz a Ruck. Renomized KFC employee, Ress, I'm still Rad at Jim, oh my Rod. R is the worst one to get. Rev. Rev. Metters. Rai Roca Ravi, Rai Rorya Rai Rhaerius. Rick Ran Rorty. Ray Rer Rererer Srun. Ralee Cosmere. Ringo. Rango. Ringo star, wanks on all thoughts.

Ringworm girl. Robert Foe. Ro Ro Roe-Raw-Mall. Roos Rock, rad-rock. Root-Rod-Rog. Ray-Ru-Ravan-Res-Rind. Ra-Read-Rey-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-ch. Rye rust, wrist, rye, ralph, rat, rads, rouse.

Fuck. Salacious crumb with prep time. Salad, 496. Samson, Scrat, scribble, seafood, sell paisley for a can of Coke and some McCoys. Several gay rats in a trench coat. Shane Kaiser. Snort. Simsy.

Sippin on Cumbrium Methazine with come I fell in love sketch screen SKJ Kara Slimy Bill Sloinkey Slot Bid Mid Smoking that Paul McCart

Sneaker Trickster Some sort of nondescript patron sort of name Splink Super Crunchers Televised Latte That pair of Jim's pants That Alex threw out the window Still here, help

That special moment when Wankers Descends from the shelf And enters your PSA 5 allowing you to immerse yourself into a plant game the backneck the desert is a place where you can get replaced if you're not careful and you trip on four the dude walter for the last time the dude does not have plot armor walter i'm telling you dude the funniest funniest funny man the gunge from under my grundle's stunks and taste of clunge and munge the jelking jarling the other finished Charling, the Poo Man, the Portuguese geyser, the Ruther Ratronzai Rubru, R, Rour, Remroy, Rorn,

The Sea is All I Know, The wooden pen, Thomas Martin, Throbba-lobba-lobob, Tim looks like a serial flag hangar, Toby Reed, Tom Baroneck, Tom Beiss, Tonyos Welt, Travis King, Thank you everyone that was there was every name on the Epstein list Tyler Joe Jogan the creator Rogan Ty Pop Unwashed Reptile Venomized Oogilovs and the Big

Bugger Adventure Venomized baby Rick eviscerating a pigeon Venomized KFC Dilf Venomized porny, venomized Rico Dave Brian Venomized Slam McKenzie The original party worm

Riembrosell Venomized Zelensky Vin Diesel is the best Beatle, don't at me Vincent Earl Void Walker Pee Wee Please pee in me

Pretty please I need we Weekly Voyager com Welcome to Mythbusters Can you milk a marmit White Boy Go Crazy Who's on what or something Ha ha ha

Alex get behind me War begins Windar Woke Daydrick Would be splendid If I had some meatballs you know I always thought normality was kind of ridiculous

so I wrote a podcast about it and it goes a little something like that yawn mower you are everyone you hate Zach Nordquist Zell and Zodiac Ratman Wow Legends

I think the second half might be harder You got ours You got venomized Yeah I like the Vs That's a legendary run there I want I want They can coordinate

now for real. I want our wonderful patrons to have it a concerted effort this coming month to all change your names to beginning with the letter R. That would be just wonderful. Just just to update you. Thank you.