JAR Media Posdact - Boom Boom, SMACK! - JARCAST Episode 205

Episode Date: February 24, 2020

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/jar-media-store Twitter: https://twitter.com/FourFunnies ...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Good afternoon, morning, evening, evening on night. Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Alex hosting here today, the 205th episode of the JARCust. I'm joined, as always, by the passionate napper himself, James. Yes. And the master of reloads over there on my far right, not that that matters to anyone listening or watching. Jim. Yeah, what's good, what's good? What's good?
Starting point is 00:00:30 Also a skilled marksman, as it turns out. Yeah, those who've seen the intro know, Jim's clearly been practicing with his Nerf gun skills. Yeah, Nerf gun. Yeah. That's what I stick to. Before we get deep into the show, deep down, we deep down delve into the show.
Starting point is 00:00:51 I'd like to shout out the patrons over the JAR Media Patreon for making the audio version of the show possible. Rate us 5 star on iTunes and all of that lovely shilly stuff Yeah, that's out of the way So how are we doing? It's 10pm on a Thursday I mean
Starting point is 00:01:11 Delirious? Are you all a bit delirious? You know, what's good? What's good, you know? It's a bit of a crazy, crazy day You know, we're pulling all nighters Like we do, living life on the edge We've got some stuff to talk about aside from boom boom smack um hold up what what what was that you just said uh boom boom smack i'm i'm a more of a smack guy myself but you know what have you not heard of this
Starting point is 00:01:44 boom boom boom smack you not heard it no no no no it's just something new to me um it's just you know people were saying it they just been going boom boom smack it's like a thing people are doing at the moment what i heard about this joke yeah just like a little non-sequitur boom boom smack let's let's do a quick role play okay so me and james are walking into your door you're the person that's going to have to say it because you understand the context of why i understand how to implement it Yeah. So I've just walked in, yo,
Starting point is 00:02:25 what's good? Boom, boom. Smack. So it's literally just that. So it means good? In a way. Yeah, it's good to send in text form. In my opinion.
Starting point is 00:02:40 Actually, no. Sorry to interrupt, but when you text it, is it boom, send, boom, send smack? That's one option, especially if you're using iMessage and you can use the, you know, you can send like animations or whatever.
Starting point is 00:02:52 So you can do like boom boom. Another option. Another option, of course, is the like explosion emoji. Two of those, comma, hand slap. Boom, boom, smack. Right. See, no, no. I know where Alex is coming from with this because boom is now a big part of my vocabulary.
Starting point is 00:03:12 You know, if you've just done something. Boom. You've just boom. Yeah, James has been booming for ages. And I've just kind of added a smack. I think James has been booming since he was born. You could say he's a. baby boomer so we got boom boom smack why do you get to be smack okay boom boom smack well why
Starting point is 00:03:30 am i smack okay boom boom boom smack what i'm i'm i'm a boomer so i say boom james is a boomer so one of us is smack yeah i want to i want i want to hear the feedback from the community on that yeah they can decide aside from the absolute chaos that was caused from this um question that that finished off the last episode about how many holes are in a drinking straw. I saw a V-sauce video on this. Oh, really? What did he say? Um... I can't remember.
Starting point is 00:04:03 Oh, he... So, from what I understand, he said there's two. No, he didn't. So you do remember? No. He said two, if I'm white, rightfully remembered. There are two types of holes. Pussy, an ass
Starting point is 00:04:22 mouth, three, ears No, there's a hole that doesn't go all the way through something Right Okay And then there's a hole that does go all the way through So there is one hole Actually, actually how would you know
Starting point is 00:04:42 So let's say the straw debate is the first one So there would be two holes It's just one of them hasn't gone all the way through and the other one has connected it. So therefore there'd be two holes. No. Well, yeah. Well, we're going to approach a similar sort of thing in the questions segment in the second half
Starting point is 00:05:01 because I saw one of the questions and I said, oh, that's a good one to ask. But that comes later. That comes later. Do it. We haven't done what we've been. We haven't done one of those, you know, what we've been watching. reading you know you know yeah my dude you know won't be reading because we're all illiterate you know like children i'm not illiterate why would you say that when was the last time
Starting point is 00:05:29 you read something i listened to audiobooks does that count no um no there you go you don't you don't need ears to listen you kind of do actually we've been watching listening to and let's just start with the big the big news right the blue wolf himself sign the vark Jim and I watch that. Did we have to? Yeah, we don't have to spend long on it, but it's relevant, you know, like, Sonic the Head Show, like, everyone loves it, it's coming back into action, and people have been busting my balls online about Sonic
Starting point is 00:06:02 for about half a decade, actually. Even, like, today I woke up, checked my Reddit, my I-H-E-Redit, and saw someone had taken some thing that I'd said in my Sonic video I did when I was, like, 19, and were like, apparently in that video I said that the first level of Mario is so much better than the first level of the original Sonic which is very true which I don't even remember saying
Starting point is 00:06:29 but it is true yeah it probably is true but it is true but like um I guess it's being resurfaced because Sonic is being talked about more than ever because of this movie um what did you think Jim you loved it right is it detective Pikachu it's better than detects
Starting point is 00:06:48 Pikachu yeah no doubt in my mind yeah it is but it doesn't mean it's not for babies absolutely it's absolutely for babies
Starting point is 00:06:57 and Sonic fans so to me it was quite boring no doubt is it boring I would never contest that the only times I was entertained was when Jim Carrey was on screen really
Starting point is 00:07:10 yeah because see the part I was entertained was this idea of establishing a core Sonic law that I can jump on board But it's not even a core Sonic law though You don't think so? Why not? Because the laws
Starting point is 00:07:24 In this movie don't apply to Like Sonic games I don't care about the games That's the thing, there's so many games James, you tell me the law of the Sonic Game on Wii where he's got, he's a knight Or something or a werewolf? Like, what's going on in this universe? But it's better, like, the
Starting point is 00:07:38 original Sonic. Yeah, and it seems like it's channeling that original Sonic with the Chili Dogs and, you know No, no, I'm talking about there being no law it's more like Mario there's a good guy that you play us
Starting point is 00:07:51 and there's a bad guy and the goal is simple be the bad guy but they have to tell they have there's a movie you have to have like a story well I mean ideally to me
Starting point is 00:08:01 there would never have been a Sonic movie yeah but that's not a choice I'm afraid we don't get to choose that in our lives unfortunately do
Starting point is 00:08:12 okay do you do you think this Sonic movie is better than what this illumination Mario Bros movie is going to wind up being? What do you think that is going to be better? The thing is Mario is better than Sonic. So...
Starting point is 00:08:27 It might... If it just looks like Mario and sounds like Mario... Yeah. And they don't illumination it too much. Yeah. It could just inherently be somewhat charming because of that. But this is an illumination we're talking about. It just depends on how much Nintendo wants to creatively control it.
Starting point is 00:08:44 But elimination can't help but put in like a... Pharrell song or something Oh absolutely yeah there'll be some Billy Elish will do a Mario song That's something that was quite disappointing about the Sonic movie Like none of the classic Yeah it needed more of that like edgy 90s
Starting point is 00:09:01 Like kind of grungy I was thinking more like Like the Green Hillsone song and No they did that a couple times to be fair But it was like the the somber Yeah but like when it was a crazy action scene it should have been like yeah you know what I'm saying no yeah
Starting point is 00:09:23 it absolutely could have been so much better yeah but you know it wasn't as bad as I was expecting it to be yeah because if nothing else though Sonic has great music yeah Sonic does have great music so they miss the big beat which we which we probably have attachment to because of smash bros being on that stage
Starting point is 00:09:47 on those stages some good stuff in there oh yeah no doubt what flashes through your mind James when you think of Sonic the Hedro see I'm a Sonic player who didn't play the originals
Starting point is 00:10:01 I played the the tri-team oh Sonic Heroes Sonic Heroes that game so bad I absolutely fucking love that game did you actually finish it no almost it
Starting point is 00:10:13 No one did. I have seen... No one did. That game is like happiness to me. Like, the thought of that game brings me joy. Nostalgia? Yeah. But Sonic shit.
Starting point is 00:10:25 So, yeah. Damn. There is, there's arguably no fan base more passionate than the Sonic fan base. Hmm. So I'm glad they're enjoying it, at the very least. Yeah. Anything else of note? We did, we all got together and watched Knives out.
Starting point is 00:10:40 I saw it for the second time. Jim saw it for the first time. and James saw it for the first time. What did you guys think of that? Pleasantly surprised by it because going into I kind of didn't know what to expect and then you've got you know Daniel Craig's character kind of slowly gets actually becomes more of a figure within the movie and it's just like his role was great
Starting point is 00:10:59 he is so great in that movie it's so interesting to see to see him do a role that isn't like a James Bond type role and he's kind of trying more and it's just like great. Yeah like it's not muscle it's not about muscle at all he's just a detective. Yeah it gets boring when like an actor like him who is sort of cast for being hot and then they end up just doing
Starting point is 00:11:21 a bunch of movies where they're like young hot successful guy whereas in this like he's just really good detective from somewhere in Texas right yeah at first is like the accent kind of hit me like that's really weird yeah it's that thing with like
Starting point is 00:11:39 actors we know are British and usually have a really British accent doing like another accent, especially an American one. The weirdest one I find is Benedict Cumberbatch. I don't know if it's because his accent's bad or because I'm just so used to him speaking a certain way, but it bugs me more of that one. But anyway, back to the canives out. It's so weird because the last movie I saw Daniel Craig in was that bad Specter,
Starting point is 00:12:05 that bad James Bond movie. He looks so miserable in that movie. He does. Seeing emotion in this movie from him, he's like, really fresh and it's really he seemed to be having fun yeah yeah and and judging that there's gonna be like a spin off of just him doing
Starting point is 00:12:20 this type of stuff again shows that I guess he really like the one it's a really good role but then you've also got Chris Evans in this movie he was quite enjoyable because he's just a fucking twat mm-hmm and I enjoyed that the whole cast is actually really good it's a whole ensemble I was I was presently
Starting point is 00:12:36 surprised by because it was my second viewing and it being a murder mystery you would have thought knowing every beat it kind of would take some of the punch out of it but it was really cool actually to see it again and see all the cogs and the setup and the payoff stuff that's a really detailed movie
Starting point is 00:12:54 yeah yeah I'm happy for Aaron Johnson after yeah definitely what happened with The Last Jedi to come back and just go back to what he's good at type stuff and you know homage the kind of thing he's always loved like he did with brick and all that kind of stuff it was a pleasant movie it's like if a movie to me
Starting point is 00:13:14 if I think about it days after I know it's like a good movie almost and that movie I was thinking about it I was just like I was just thinking about the scenes and just like the acting and it's just like that movie is just good and I enjoy it because that's the thing
Starting point is 00:13:26 like there's nothing worse than a the worst the worst movies to me in my mind are the ones that once they're over you forget about and never think about again your men in black internationals your Joker God damn it
Starting point is 00:13:38 I just one for me not Joker no because didn't that linger in your mind in how much it kind of made you feel you know It made me feel shit And then I went home
Starting point is 00:13:47 Yeah but that's like Yeah I still need to rewatch Joker From my superior video But I'm kind of looking forward to it now Because it's been ages Yes And like people have been talking about it for ages
Starting point is 00:13:58 And I'm like I'm ready to sit down on my own And You know just watch it and Take it in Yeah Without any So it's weird
Starting point is 00:14:09 Like I have this thing where when I first go and see a movie especially a movie that's been reported on so much there's so much buzz so many memes so much shit it's in the zeitgeist for so long like it I don't even know what to think and I think I said that when we first watched it like I didn't really want to talk about it that much because I didn't even know what to think of it so I think enough time is kind of passed now where I can you know buy it on 4k or whatever and just watch it on my own and see what I think about it. Speaking of
Starting point is 00:14:39 Joaquin Phoenix looking after his mom, I watched you were never really here. Did you see the parallels in that with Joker? Yeah,
Starting point is 00:14:48 it's quite weird, isn't it? It is weird. That is a very good movie and it's quite a short movie. That's what I like about it. Yeah, I really like that. Like, not enough movies know when to sort of just say
Starting point is 00:15:03 that's enough, that's what I'm saying. Because, like, the character clearly has a lot of like history yeah and they they show you enough whereas i think a movie for stupider people where it would like explicitly show those yeah like a 50 minute flashback yeah and then that would make it up to two hours and then you'd have your two hour yeah no it's succinct shit yeah and the way they handle violence in that movie i thought was really clever yeah yeah Like it's almost more It almost hits harder because of the
Starting point is 00:15:39 Restrained way they showed everything Even though it is clearly like some kind of budgetary thing It's only a small production but it really works But it always like focuses on him During any violence Which yeah Clever movie Anything else we've been a
Starting point is 00:15:59 I've watched quite a lot recently Um I watched prisoners yeah another really good one yeah like really like that movie really really good um i mean there's not much i've got to say about it other than it's really really good
Starting point is 00:16:17 i also watched uh uncut gems oh yeah you did didn't you yeah yeah did you like that very much so it's the first i don't know how many adam sandler movies there are where he's there are three or four i've seen the morning now. Right. Yeah, where he's actually trying. Where he's being dramatic or something.
Starting point is 00:16:40 And in this... Yeah, he's awesome in this film. He's genuinely really good. And like, he's a proper fucking scumbag. That's what I really respect about, like, an actor should be willing to play the whole gambit, you know? Like, he can play silly, family guy, comedian.
Starting point is 00:16:59 And then he can play something like a hardcore, you know, asshole gambling... gambling addict piece of shit like the character in uncut gems that's what annoys me so much about like when I hear the rock and his contracts and stuff he's like yeah yeah he like always has to be the good guy and he always has to you know can't be too bad it kind of proves that you're shit actor really if you're not even willing to actually act it's like I know there's a certain level of like you don't want to be type cut well he hasn't forced himself into being typecast basically the rock that is
Starting point is 00:17:32 But, I mean, the thing is, he would have been typecast anyway. Yeah, so why even put it in your contract? Yeah. Whatever. Whatever. I've been addicted to Red Dead Online at the moment. I never really got too much out of GTA online. I really like the heist stuff.
Starting point is 00:17:54 But it never really hooked me in that way. Yeah. Whereas, you know, that kind of online service, destiny style, of the drip feeding daily drip feed stuff like for some reason read that online's really um got its hooks into me um it's just the perfect amount of layers of like um what's it called in video games we have like a loop of gameplay yeah the gameplay loop fucks sake they have loads of gameplay loops like um stacked on top of each other so like what by the time you've done one like two more ready to do and it's just like you just constantly have things to do yeah and then by the time
Starting point is 00:18:35 you look at your watch it's 1 a.m and it's like fuck um so i've been enjoying that a lot uh because it's been a while since one of those you know games that are designed to be super addictive games really got its claws into me yeah post destiny you've been pretty yeah because i went in so hard on destiny I was kind of burnt out on the concept for a while So it's nice seeing it in a new skin Because of course I like Red Dead 2's like single player so much It just makes sense that Because it wasn't like I tried Red Dead online when it first came out
Starting point is 00:19:11 And it was fine, it was okay But it was like whatever Yeah, it was released in like the beta Yeah But jumping in like a month ago or whatever it was Like it was like oh yeah this is really cool now Like there's stuff to do There's still some shit that needs to be sorted out
Starting point is 00:19:26 but it's it's keeping me addicted like you're addicted to cod jones yeah and not on it's like on the other hand of the type of I know addiction almost the we the reasons why you're addicted to where there is like the can why I'm not addicted to cod like it's the same almost but it's just like there's not layers there's not loads of different things it's just like the same fucking thing it's the same activity but within that activity you have loads of different things you can level and stuff like that Pretty much. And obviously, it's worth noting, we've said a lot,
Starting point is 00:19:59 I was like a big time cod player back in the day. So, like, this is, this is the return of being a fucking cod loser, basically. Do you still play it like every night? Yes. I play it every day. Every single day I play home, I play cod. I've done every gun, and now it's just doing all the camos. It's doing everything.
Starting point is 00:20:18 When was the last time when a cod game grabbed you like that? One or fair two. Because you've... It's a three. Not as. bad yeah but still you were hooked on that I was because it was like the day
Starting point is 00:20:32 I was nothing nothing to play but I currently put in around six days and if you consider you know I've obviously got a full-time job it's quite a lot of game time I've sunk in and it's not stopping anytime soon I'm fully clawed in I reckon
Starting point is 00:20:48 the last one was Apex Legends actually you really went in on that but then you just no that's a problem once you leveled up because we kind of got into Apex sessions really early on where it was kind of still really early days fairly bare bones but really fun it's core so i i went in hard got to max level really quickly and then there was no progress there was no content at that point it did take them way too long to have the season two and three come out yeah it did take a while so i i fell off the train now apex is like pulling a lead on every
Starting point is 00:21:20 others because it's got so much there there's so much going on yeah like that new robot guy they added like that trailer was really cool I was like oh this is this is neat kind of wish it was like a single player thing like Titanfall 2 but whatever it's neat but I gave up on that game it's like the thing I went in so hard at first I can't get back into it now
Starting point is 00:21:40 because I've already done it all it's just I can't go back to it maybe one day one day maybe but with Cod being an annual release still it seems like I'm going to be jumping the wagon until it burns me out which will probably be soon
Starting point is 00:21:56 because it's also like I went fully in on Foursers as well I did like leaderboard you know top tier racing type stuff burn out on that and I haven't played the Faza since so it's like I'm gonna go through
Starting point is 00:22:09 card and then get sick of that and then move on to something else but it's just like I have this need for like progression in a game I need to know that what I'm doing is going somewhere with it
Starting point is 00:22:21 I can't I know you mean I can't play a game for no way reason anymore. Yeah, like, you want to feel like you're always chipping away at something. Yeah, a little bit. That's what I like about achievements, and I've always been an achievement hunter for that exact
Starting point is 00:22:32 reason. Like, it's a, it's like a framing device for, um, for reasons to explore a game in a certain way. Like, I've been, it's taken me so long to go through Red Day because the achievement list is ridiculous and stupid and unfair, um, but I'm doing it. And I've got some fun out of some of the specific ones, but. yeah i don't really get addicted like you guys do to that same sort of thing like i'll hop on red dead once twice a week i only really have like long sessions if i play
Starting point is 00:23:07 with you yeah um i've been playing a bit of securo again which is definitely the best game of last year like without a doubt in my mind yeah it's really good um played doom a couple of weeks ago we can't talk about doom again we brought it up on every castle like the last month every time every time we mention that it's we keep
Starting point is 00:23:37 we like say that it's made by Bethesda where I guess we mean it's published by Bethesda because I've never said that it was made I don't remember us saying it It's a Bethesda game We must have said it's a Bethesda game And there's this one guy Which it is because it's published by Bethesda
Starting point is 00:23:52 There's this one guy in the comments who, like, really gets annoyed by saying that. Because Bethesda didn't develop the game. They could make a game. It could even worse if it was developed by Bethesda. Yeah, man. Anything else we've absorbed? I've been watching the boys on Amazon. Yeah, you heard.
Starting point is 00:24:13 Because I've been trying to finish up all the superhero content from last year for my eventual video. but it's it's quite good yeah I've been I've seen it because I'm now slowly being influenced into having you know being actually watching things and movies and trying to yeah push the train a bit
Starting point is 00:24:36 and that's one I've been interested because of Carl Urban he's like a cockney gaze in it he's just I've always liked him yeah it's way edgier and than I was anticipating and way more like political too
Starting point is 00:24:55 than I was anticipating it's like a refreshing thing in the in the superior genre because the like the whole Deadpool way of like making fun of the superior genre is like so on the nose like superhero landing
Starting point is 00:25:12 Badoobo! Yeah it's not like making a comment above like surface level stuff yeah because in the boys like it's a universe like there are characters that the stories like self-contained but it's really cool because like it's basically if the justice league were corrupt is this is the idea so but every like every superhero in the in the I can't remember what their group is called the thing's called the seven um every superhero is like managed by like a PR team and stuff like that and it's really corporate and like fucked up yeah yeah there's all
Starting point is 00:25:49 this like me too shit going on and it's like really really dark at certain points um and there's some some fucked up like super year humor stuff and like there's like a stretchy character who does like things that you'd always imagine like man if i had that power like that's the kind of shit i'd do like stuff like weird like shit like that it's definitely worth a watch and weirdly high production value too for really these like streaming that was my main worry because it's it's clear it's Not like on the level of, you know, fucking Avengers, obviously. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's probably better than, like, that Last X-Men movie or, you know, some of the shit like that.
Starting point is 00:26:28 Really? Yeah, or at least on par. You know, it's very cinematic. And it's for an eight-episode show. So there's way more content in there. Is there going to be multiple seasons? I believe so, yeah. Simon Pegg's in there, Carl Urban.
Starting point is 00:26:41 It's got a good cast. It's very, I'd recommend it if you haven't seen it. And you're interested in that superhero stuff, but you're sick of the kind of babyish. yeah yeah stuff that's constantly out there um there is a game actually i've been playing and you're going to judge me because it's actually a mobile game really yeah is this the first mobile game no because you've talked about 10 10 before
Starting point is 00:27:03 no that that doesn't count because this is this is the first mobile game i've ever ever bought really what why is it it was 70p what is it um plague dot ink yeah i've heard of it yeah because you'd be used to play in school it's that tough a game I'm pretty sure it wasn't around
Starting point is 00:27:23 when we were in school it's not that old no like you create like a virus or bacteria or whatever and you try and kill the entirety of the world it's an online game
Starting point is 00:27:36 you should play in school no no no it's very relevant I know what you're thinking of because it's also a dot ink but no it's like a simulation heavy air quotes
Starting point is 00:27:47 because like it's not accurate or anything but like yeah was it in your mind because of the corona thing that's yeah it kind of was yeah because all these movies about infections and things have like rocketed up yeah yeah like iTunes charts and stuff because everyone's it's on everyone's mind it's funny as well because um in the tutorial which would have been made before the coronavirus it's like um okay choose your country to start the the the The plague in. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:20 And it automatically directs you to China. Really? Because that's a great place to start a virus. Absolutely. The dense of the population, the higher chance it has is spreading, I suppose. Yeah. And I just thought. Uh-oh.
Starting point is 00:28:35 Let's hope their office isn't based in China. Hmm. Yeah, before we go to end of part one, I just want to say, um, FU to the one guy on my Reddit who said on that Sonic post about Green Hill Zone or whatever that it was like
Starting point is 00:28:57 oh don't worry he's got a notoriously bad taste in games so what the fuck you're talking about it's the Mario I was saying Mario's better than Sonic alright? Yeah that like you're in the minority if you prefer Sonic to Mario yeah if you're a Genesis kid less fine but like dude you gotta realize you're up against Mario right now
Starting point is 00:29:17 yeah Mario is better Fuck you Boom Come on the cast We can debate Sonic Yeah let's do this Absolutely
Starting point is 00:29:27 We can go on smash as well You play Sonic I play as Mario See what happens Yeah see what happens It'll just be like a You know Chad versus Cuck match
Starting point is 00:29:35 Zing Boom Boom With that being said that though Boom boom Miao Boom boom Boom
Starting point is 00:29:48 We're back after these messages. Smack. Want a dick on a shirt? Check the description below. Welcome to the second half of the JARCast where we answer questions from the community. If you want to leave your own questions for us, head over to the JAR Media Reddit,
Starting point is 00:30:09 our slash JAR Media and go to the suggestions thread which should be pinned at the top if the Reddit hasn't messed up and broken. Like it keeps doing lately, it's very annoying. Let's start off from, with a question from Sebastian del Tovo, who says, I think this would make a pretty epic debate on the cast. How many holes does a person have? This is the one I teased earlier.
Starting point is 00:30:35 Okay. Let's figure this out. So. No. Technically, technically, the mouth and the butthole of the same one. Oh, we go on this route. Wait, but you said a straw was two. No, because that's a straw.
Starting point is 00:30:55 This is different. A straw is a piece of paper. Straw's like way less complicated. No. No. What do you mean? A straw starts out as a piece of paper that's rolled up. My body does not start as a piece of paper.
Starting point is 00:31:07 There's two. Which is way more complicated. There's one hole. Okay, so you've got, but, but, but genitals. I would not say that. there's a hole? There is definitely a hole. What are we defining as a hole? An exit or entrance?
Starting point is 00:31:26 What about an... Yeah, but an entrance... Has to go somewhere. Okay, let's put it this way. If an ant wanted to crawl inside, what holes could it do it through? It could do it through your urethra, or your puss, or your asshole,
Starting point is 00:31:42 or your nose... But you said a straw had one hole. yeah so but so you're saying because they're all connect through two different holes no but you forget about the straw thing this is separate no this isn't separate this is a separate ground rules we need to lay down ground rules otherwise all of it is meaningless this is a separate issue no it's not because a straw isn't a biological creation why does that matter but we're talking about holes is each nostril count as a separate hole that's what is really going on in my mind
Starting point is 00:32:17 the same... It's like... They are separate holes. No, they're not. Because they both go up there and they split into two. That means there's one. Because they both go to the same place. They're both...
Starting point is 00:32:28 The same area where they connect. So they're basic... They're one. The mouth goes to the ars. Right? Surely the mouth goes to the urethra as well, because you drink and pee. Well, no, but then you put it that way. People fucking...
Starting point is 00:32:46 People snort spaghetti. get in, take out of their mouth that's anything they're connected so it should like I so every hole in our body's connected it's one hole the body's one hole
Starting point is 00:33:00 no there's not one hole there's not no there is if there's one hole how does double penetration exist then that implies there's two holes
Starting point is 00:33:12 no that's because they're double penetrating two entrances that there's still one hole because so you're telling me the right and left ear count as one hole no because they're different that's there's a brain in between them so they're two holes so ear ear nostril nostril nostril mouth no nostrils one no no why is nostril one because I told you that they can it's the same thing up there so that goes up and they join and then they come down ear ear nostril so you're saying
Starting point is 00:33:47 the mouth and the asshole are the same whole no that's what James is saying no I'm saying I'm saying this about nostrils not asses so no you're anal is a blowjob this is why I wanted by that logic this is why I wanted to set
Starting point is 00:34:05 the rules straight no no no because I'm being because you guys are just saying whatever you you're making it work to your you answer the question then one you answer One hole. No, that's bullshit.
Starting point is 00:34:19 That is bullshit. You just called James out the same. At least I got fucking rules, man. No, you don't. Yeah, they're incorrect. You just correct them. Because you just called James out on the mouth and anus being the same hole. Okay, they're not the same whole.
Starting point is 00:34:32 No, they are only the same hole if your nostrils are the same hole. I'm okay of that because if you, if you... But a nose is one thing though. You know? The digest, like the digestive. system is one thing no the nose has one purpose right okay so your urethra and your asshole are one hole no they're different because your your genitals and your asshole have different purposes yeah the nostrils are like two and why do purposes matter we're talking about holes it's essential to their
Starting point is 00:35:08 biological purpose yeah the guys are obsessing over no over um the fact that it's a biological thing No, but that's the question. Instead of how many holes there are. The question was how many holes are there? On a human... There's not one fucking hole. No, that was me just fucking throwing bullshit. No, but the question is how many holes on a human body?
Starting point is 00:35:27 That's the biological thing we need to... I mean, are paws included? No. No, think of it this way to him. We have to draw the line somewhere. No, the nostrils are... they're one. Because it's just like... It's an intake.
Starting point is 00:35:40 You suck air through it. If you cover that off this one... What happens if one of your nostrils is blocked? He's still got one. Because you've still got two entrances here. I think her nose is two holes. So you disagree with James. Oh, much far.
Starting point is 00:35:57 James says the nose is one hole. No, it is one hole. It makes perfect sense. It's only one hole if you've got a cocaine addiction. Because you destroy the cartilage that separates it. That separates the two holes. So it's the only thing separating the holes is cartilage. No, but you said there's one hole.
Starting point is 00:36:15 That was me just fucking... You fucked it by confusing the whole thing. No, you guys are retarded. Ear. Ear. Nostral. Nostral. Mouth.
Starting point is 00:36:26 Genitals. Arse. 5, 6, 7. No, that's bullshit. 8. What's the 8th? That one. No.
Starting point is 00:36:38 You're forgetting the bellyburn. Not a hole. That's a fucking... No, it's not. That's a cave. no how would fluff get stuck down there if it wasn't a hole the ear hole isn't a hole if the belly button isn't a hole
Starting point is 00:36:54 look alex like it's a fucking hole no but it's not there's nothing that goes in there's nothing deep within no this is how you eat is a baby are you saying it doesn't lead to an exit this is fucked this is fuck no your rules make no sense Okay, you answer the question then.
Starting point is 00:37:16 No, you're saying. You answer the fucking question. No, the belly button is a hole. I need to, like, draw this. So if, if, so imagine one hole goes all the way through zombie pig man's head. That's one hole. Right?
Starting point is 00:37:37 Right. Another one goes halfway through his head. That's an, that a hole? That's a hole. That's a hole. but it's only got one entrance. We're getting caught up on the definition of a word. Okay, let me phrase it this way then.
Starting point is 00:37:50 There are seven entrances slash exits on the body. Yeah, but you could say the belly button is an entrance. To what? Alex, when you're a baby. The earhole go. To the brain. No, it doesn't. There's a barrier.
Starting point is 00:38:07 Being the eardrum. The belly button is a hole. We can't deny that it is. a hole. No, it's the most hole in the body. So there's one hole all the way through. That's a hole. One halfway through. What's that? That's a hole. Alex? Is that a hole? The one that goes
Starting point is 00:38:26 halfway through? What are you talking about? Why is it a hole? What? So someone shot a bullet and it got stuck on the skull? Just, just imagine it. There's a hole through his head. It's nose. No. Fucking hell. literal hole. That's not the, this is completely irrelevant. No, it's just right. I'm, ironing out the rules. I'm trying to understand your logic
Starting point is 00:38:51 because you aren't using rules. You're just saying, no, that's not a whole because it doesn't go anywhere. Yeah, but. Because think about it. What about the people who have an outy? This is fucked. How's it whole if it's a fucking outy? Can we, can we move from the belly? Can we focus on this please? No, because you just got, fuck. an ouchy a hole no but the outy isn't a hole
Starting point is 00:39:17 and it needs a hole because it is a fucking hole if you if you if I dig a hole in the floor it might not go anywhere it's still a fucking hole that's my point no that is correct so it's a hole
Starting point is 00:39:31 but if we get it is a hole if we're getting that granular though that means some people have seven holes and some people have eight no but that's that's deny That was the purpose of the This guy
Starting point is 00:39:46 The zombie pig man Yeah to show you like if If you can define a hole As like a cavern Right It shouldn't matter the size Let me put it this way then The cavern
Starting point is 00:40:02 The holes I'm describing Have some kind of biological purpose There's no purpose to a belly bun An ear hole is a purpose Nostrils have a purpose have a purpose a mouth has a purpose the arsehole has a purpose no no urethru why are you focusing on purposes no can I add the belly button had a purpose when we're a baby it's the only way we exist which is true but why but why does the purpose
Starting point is 00:40:27 even matter I think in terms of context and the fact we're talking about a human body the context does matter because we're talking about a human body we're we're purely talking about holes no we're talking about holes on the human body how many holes as a person have. So, so I think that the use, the biological use of the thing is irrelevant. Is relevant? Who describes a belly button as a hole?
Starting point is 00:40:55 Like it, like, people say ear hole. You know? Are eyes holes? No, no, the fucking belly button is a hole. If you've got any belly button, that is a fucking hole. There's no way around it. What is it if it's not a fucking hole? fucking hole.
Starting point is 00:41:14 What is it? Come on. Let me just feel it. It goes in, for sure. Fluff is not going to get caught in it if it wasn't a hole. Belly burn is a hole. That's the most hole on your body. It's got no use. Just a hole.
Starting point is 00:41:31 So we're agreeing on 7 slash 8 then. Depending on if you have an inner reality. Wait, I'm... What are you? searching. We've gone for like 12 minutes on this one question. I'm talking I've Googled a hole.
Starting point is 00:41:50 What's the definition of a hole? A hollow place in a solid body or surface. So, by that definition we're 70% water. Are we even a solid, bro? Not really. No, but surely if that was the case, then there's no holes on the human body. Besides
Starting point is 00:42:08 the belly bone. The belly bun is the only hole. I don't know what I'm talking about. How does that make it that only hole? Well, read it again. So you can't mind me what I just said. A hollow place in a solid body or surface. No, but this isn't solid.
Starting point is 00:42:23 There's a fucking hollow thing here. The inside's hollow. Why's your inside's hollow? Something wrong. Well, you've got a stomach avenue. That's not fucking solid. It's hollow. It's full.
Starting point is 00:42:34 I don't agree with that definition. No, okay. What, for a hole? Yeah. Oh, now you're fucking challenging. the definition of the hole. I'm challenging Google because think of a ball, a hollow ball. If you stab it.
Starting point is 00:42:51 Wait, it's hollow called hollow because it's got a hole. Holo. Holo. No. No. If a ball, like a football full of air, it's hollow in the middle. But does it have a hole? Yes, because how do they pump it up?
Starting point is 00:43:07 No, no, no. There's a hole. There's no pump. I'm just saying a ball that's a hole. that just exists, it's berth. It just exists. Yes, there'll be a hole. Because how would you pump it up? It's not a hole then. No, oh my God. Because I feel like a hole needs some kind of entrance or exit. Yeah, but this is saying just a hollow space. I guess in the definition. In a surface. Yeah, that's what it said. It didn't specify a hole in a surface.
Starting point is 00:43:33 In a solid body or surface. Yeah, that works. No, in a solid body, though, if it was the surface of solid body but it's a solid body or surface this is getting too granular for me I can't I can't okay I'm just gonna Google how many holes a fucking human has
Starting point is 00:43:53 yeah see what Google thinks I have a feeling it's gonna say seven okay so so surely a girl would have more have more have more why would a girl have more
Starting point is 00:44:05 because of the foo who? Wait, yeah. Wait, if, yeah. Because they have a eerie threat and a vagina. And milk comes out of tities. How's milk going to come out of those at the hole?
Starting point is 00:44:23 We've ignored nipples. Oh, fuck. Wait. We fucked this. How many holes are there in a male and female human body? If you don't count the pores on skin, then there are eight holes in a
Starting point is 00:44:38 male body and nine holes. We got there eventually. In a female body. Male. How can they beat only one more hole on a female body if we're not including nipples? Men can lactate. This is classing eyes as a whole. Wait, so...
Starting point is 00:44:55 No way. What? Two eyes, two ears, one nose. Oh my god. There it is. One mouth. But you have two nostrils, those. I'm a fucking genius.
Starting point is 00:45:07 One urethra. And one anus. one fucking think about the way this is fucked no no the nostial thing's white I'm white and you fucking know it
Starting point is 00:45:20 but they're counting two nipples as one what they didn't say nipples for the women right no no why do they have an extra hole is the vagina so so nipples aren't holes then I guess not
Starting point is 00:45:33 no no what has the milk come from then the pores nipple is not a giant paw well obvious no like that's why they're called nipples can we focus on the fact that two nostrils is one hole it's a cave with two entrances
Starting point is 00:45:52 but that means it's one hole this is fuck this is fuck no I'm white on the nostril part no let's think of one of those straws that is one and then it goes into being two it's still one that's one straw
Starting point is 00:46:09 one hole with two heads but you said a straw has two holes so surely to you that means it's got three holes so the original debate you were wrong
Starting point is 00:46:22 yes I'm okay with that because I'm white now um that's the this is the worst question we've ever been asked no this is a good question this might be the best question
Starting point is 00:46:35 No, but why don't they consider nipples holes? Because milk has to come out of them. They are holes. It's essential that milk comes out. So they've got to be a hole. There's got to be a hole for the milk to do. How is the baby supposed to feed without the holes excreting milk for them to suckle? Did they mention about the belly button?
Starting point is 00:46:53 No. Yeah, so I was right about the belly button thing. Wait, what the fuck? So I was right about the belly button then. The V-source clip I saw talking about, um, this straw thing yeah it's from a video called
Starting point is 00:47:12 how many holes does a human have oh for real yeah so the answer's out there somewhere well if anyone knows it's visa or theory science is all theory remember we could have cracked it right here right now no but you've broken it because you just said hey the nipples and milk are vital
Starting point is 00:47:27 for baby the baby butt the belly bun's vital for baby because that's the only way you're going to exist no but no that works So it's a hole when you're still connected to your mother? Yes. But that... No, it's not.
Starting point is 00:47:41 It's not a fucking hole, man. Forget this belly button thing. This is agreed. No, but it's... You're right on the nose thing, but wrong on the belly bun. No, but no, but an out and in the belly bun is a hole. If you remove it and use the definition, then yes, it is a hole. Therefore, it's a hole.
Starting point is 00:47:59 But when we're trying to, you know, we need fucking rules and order, otherwise it's complete chaos. You don't get to say rules. Only I get to say rules You don't Yeah, if I can do On nipples holes then Yes So it's 10, 10
Starting point is 00:48:14 10 or 11 10 or 11 No, add 12 12 and 13 Why? Each nostril So you agree I have one more
Starting point is 00:48:26 Because we've only One nostrils's already been added So it's only one more So it'd be I'm not debating the The fact that the nostrils Lead to the same pathway Yeah, it's just like two straws next to each other
Starting point is 00:48:38 No, because it's one straw They're not two straws They're one straw There's no way There are two straws up there that go into your brain It's one Go into your brain We have to stop
Starting point is 00:48:54 We have to stop 19 minutes on that Let me just quickly grab a quote from I can has cheeseburger A Lowl Cat Collection um nosy neighbor cat sees you hide in tebodies
Starting point is 00:49:11 but no no no we're done just no that was the end of this is move on no this is move on so there's no no you're not going to fucking bring up the nose or the belly button or any of it let me just get a new quote
Starting point is 00:49:29 for uh the finalization call for for help. I is stuck for reels this time. This picture of a cat with his head stuck in a chair. Derek the pig has this. If you all had to make a game based around
Starting point is 00:49:45 minions, what kind of game would it be? No. No, I refuse to answer this question. What would be the plot? No. Come on, I already asked it now. Now people want to know the answer. No. You can answer it.
Starting point is 00:50:01 There used to be this flash game I absolutely loved. It was just a rip-off of worms, basically. Minion worms? Minion worms. Honestly, that's probably the vicious deaths,
Starting point is 00:50:14 best answer possible. Like, I could actually see that being a thing, like worms teaming up with minions to get worms relevant again. Like, on mobile. So I just crush that question, basically. Where is it?
Starting point is 00:50:32 There we are. Cow of Satan says What video game or movie characters Do you think would smell the worst? Sonic All of the ones when we're dead People in red there would stink They would be stinky
Starting point is 00:50:46 But Sonic would be stinky Master Chief Think about the like sweat That Sonic would create The hedgehog sweat? Yeah, the chili dog thing All he eats is fucking chili dog Well if it's fucking funny fart Sonic
Starting point is 00:51:01 Which I didn't mention in the earlier section Sonic shouldn't be funny fart I think he shouldn't be But yeah If it was funny fart Sonic yeah He'd be stanky as hell Every character I had different gears of war
Starting point is 00:51:15 The muscles in the armour Like they'd have some stank I wouldn't really say anything to sci-fi Yeah because you can assume If they're wearing mega power armour Like master chief It's like inherently They have some bullshit like cleaning thing
Starting point is 00:51:29 Yeah It keeps them clean and stuff Resident Evil characters Yeah Like Leon and What about like Skyrim factors? They must reek No they got fresh cold
Starting point is 00:51:41 No Skyim doesn't have enough fun Yeah it does You think the main guy in Skyrim's Fucking smells like roses No I think he smells of nothing Resident Evil characters though With no wanting water And the dead
Starting point is 00:51:56 And like out of the sewers and stuff That would be fucking reek Also like wotting bodies on them yeah yeah that that stank could be top what about like the main character from Horizon Zero Dawn nah
Starting point is 00:52:10 walking through flowers all the time probably smells quite nice Jim yeah she's stinky stinky but not aloy stinky Stinky Aloy as hell
Starting point is 00:52:24 Nna Fortnite pretty stinky Thanos and Fortnite Yeah, Thanos from Fortnite pretty stinky Nathan Drake probably is a bit stinky Yeah, but he'd be that like Hot musky man stinky
Starting point is 00:52:39 You know? Yeah So it'd be kind of nice in a weird way Yeah Whereas I don't know if Alois stinky Would be nice Lauer I feel like she would have the same
Starting point is 00:52:50 Nathan kind of nice stink I was just checking your sexism What he thought was going to say Nets, she's gross um film characters Walter White probably has some stank when they're trapped in the caravan
Starting point is 00:53:12 stank that's definitely stinky boys uh slimer slimer we don't know what he smells like he could smell really nice I reckon he smells bad though because they like their face when they get slimed you know it's like true no but it could be just a feeling I would suspect both what about porny from men and black international I he's like the stinkiest thing ever no I think he smells
Starting point is 00:53:43 quite nice do you think he smells like a baby yeah you're like baby hair what about minions they stink because they wear goggles all the time they wear goggles and dungarees constantly and like um rubber shoes but and gloves just like red dead characters worse yeah but they're not and they're evil like in law they're evil so they probably want to smell and there are hordes of them in grue's basement so um presumably iron iron man at the start of end game what about a zombie make a fucking stank zombie pig man yeah Yeah, because he's rotting flesh.
Starting point is 00:54:27 Yeah. Yeah. Sandy? No. She's in that spacesuit. Underwater. No. She always looks quite cleanly.
Starting point is 00:54:41 Do you know what I mean? Or a squirrel. Squirrels are rodents, man. But she's got like an underground fucking... She's fairly sophisticated, yeah, I'll give you that. No stank. No stank. What's like the stinking?
Starting point is 00:54:56 The tinkiest Pokemon. Probably one that is like his whole thing is being stinky. Yeah, there's a few, right? Yeah. One that's not like completely obvious. Can we just say the Sladeen? The Slidine from Doctor Who? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:18 Yeah. They would stink. Yeah. They'd stink of shite. Can we move on this? It's just wrong Like there's It's not cool It's not funny
Starting point is 00:55:30 It's just a bit too far really Coon Flakes 708 underscore V2 Says hello jar Who are your favourite and most hated teachers In primary school Um Can't remember any of them
Starting point is 00:55:45 I don't really remember primary school teachers I don't have a memory I was scared of my year two teacher That's because she picked my side in the war no she didn't she did no she didn't she did wait no she she was only like my English teacher
Starting point is 00:56:02 or something uh and my year three teacher was a just a bit of a grumpster yeah the grumpster ones were no fun yeah the one I remember most was um from secondary school
Starting point is 00:56:23 this this guy who just had this ridiculous like totalitarian way of um commanding the class i know exactly it's like this weird pervert guy yeah apparently he actually was a perv really yeah he'd like intentionally drop pens and pencils and get girls to for real bend over and it's very immoral yeah for a fucking teacher like jesus ex-military as well There you go. James? Yes.
Starting point is 00:57:00 James. James. Yes. James? James. James. Come on. James. Hello.
Starting point is 00:57:18 James. Don't ignore me! James. what are the people listening supposed to think is happening right now james what you can blame instant five stars for that because they told me to do that okay oh how funny they told me to just say james over and over again until i clocked that on the first james did no you didn't yes i fucking did it's so obvious what did you say how how would you have done it then no it's nothing you can do about it but they they are often getting you to do things
Starting point is 00:57:53 and they are becoming predictable. So you think they need to get more creative? Yeah, way more creative. James! James! Try harder. You're letting yourselves down. Annung Garbage says,
Starting point is 00:58:10 whatever happened to shithead Larry? For those who don't know, shithead Larry was this weird, like, cat that used to just come into my flat when we did the cast in the flat. And apparently... He came in, what, once or twice? No, it came into my flat all the time.
Starting point is 00:58:23 in summer because I just let the doors open you'd always be by the on the wall yeah but you said when we filmed the cast yeah it was only on one cast ages ago but um apparently it was like it went missing apparently was kidnapped
Starting point is 00:58:37 yeah it was an expensive cat yeah it was one of those weird like Persian ones or something I was there I was just tapping my can in the way I said that I thought I looked like a criminal like it was me that stole the cat
Starting point is 00:58:52 It wasn't me. Um, sure. Do you want to confirm that a bit? I didn't steal the cut. I know. He did. To do the cat. Someone started their fucking question by saying bellow.
Starting point is 00:59:04 Bellow, jaw. Like a fucking minion. I'm not answering it just because I started it like that. Do one more quick question, like a quick one. Hello, boys. I'm just wondering what the fuck Alex has done to the nursery trampoline he got for Christmas. That's from Joseph Zed Khan. He's burnt it.
Starting point is 00:59:21 James Tell the truth Quickly before we in Tell them the truth Tell the truth I can't No we can't do that Alex Okay
Starting point is 00:59:31 Make an educated Everybody Yeah make an educated That's another one for the books Guys Cheerio Ladi yo Hope you enjoyed it
Starting point is 00:59:43 Thanks for supporting I said over to Patreon Please let us know How many holes the human body has Yeah Eat my ass Fucking bitch Boom boom
Starting point is 00:59:50 Smack smack smack

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.