JAR Media Posdact - Horrible Haircuts - JARCAST Episode 136

Episode Date: October 25, 2018

What's up? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, welcome to the JARCast. I'm your host, Alex, joined by Jordan and special guest, John Marston. John Marston himself has joined the cast. I'm Jamie. Your shirt says otherwise. Does everyone wear a shirt with their name on it? Yeah, Jamie is redemption.

So this is the JARCast, the show from JARMedia, where we come at you in the morning, afternoon, evening, sometimes at night, depending on where you're from. I like that what you just did, that little thing just then. What's that? That what just, like, because you could be watching this video at any time. It's brilliant, isn't it? You know what, when I'm exploring YouTube,

just watching random people's vids, seeing what the landscape's like. I like to You know Just watch the odd vid And Sometimes people I don't want to say

Are totally ripping us off And stealing our ideas Every now and again I hear People who are half-assing the jar intro Basically If they say Good afternoon

Or morning Whatever you are And then I say To myself Pathetic Yeah it's the fucking point We've put it down Yeah, when somebody nails something so perfectly,

why do... It doesn't give you the right to just nick it. You know what I mean? What's that to do with Tabascus? Cute win-fail! Hmm. I mean, no one's going around doing cute win-fail. We kind of should, though, because that's actually nice.

I like that. Anyway, this is the jarcast of... How we doing? Fantastic. You know how it be sometimes? So a couple weeks ago, we ended a podcast saying, oh, well, we'll talk about that at the beginning of the next one, then we forgot.

And then at the end of the previous one I remembered, and was like, so we had a question from someone that we thought we should genuinely answer or something, let's see where this goes from... Wasn't it about China or something? H-F-H-D-K-A-O-D saying, Hi, Hong Kong Jarling here, love the cast. I've recently listened to the cast about the Cold War. and I'm interested in what you guys think about China, e.g. trade war, censorship, human rights, etc.

Maybe also something about Hong Kong. If you guys are up for it, thank you. Also, forgot to mention what do you think about the China is a threat versus we come in peace thing? Well, heavy. I think the easiest way to start this is just talk about Hong Kong. I've got interest to go to Hong Kong. Sounds like a nice place to visit on a holiday. So when I first read it, I just made the incorrect assumption that Hong Kong. Kong was in China no but it's not it's attached to it's attached to it's a

different to the layman I mean you can't say you can't blame me no my lack of geography or my vague knowledge of geography because it was like an English like colony once I believe you know better than I had it's always it's always been its own like isolated like place I'm just gonna moisturize my hands by the way that's why got this here and and early on like quite a long time ago it was like a massive international sorry yes a massive international basically there was a lot of money in hong kong that's why kind of hong kong has a reputation because there's a lot of money there and over time the big Chinese cities have kind of surpassed that.

What's their government structure? The government structures, I don't know much about the political thing, but the only political stuff we'll really know about is the fact that Margaret Fatcher made a deal with the president of China that after a certain amount of time, like Hong Kong isn't Hong Kong anymore. The fact that China can have it back,

it basically will become China. And basically China are trying to do that. now when it ends in 21 2021 so China basically trying to force their political system on Hong Kong okay and that's causing issues as far as I'm aware some issues further than like you see I'm not going to be around the bush like I know nothing about this subject I don't know shit about China what what flings into your mind when you you think of China though well I've I've heard recently about concentration camps in China or something much like them.

Yes. Yeah, I don't know if they're quite like Holocaust camps. They're keeping a large, large, large amount of Muslims in concentration. They're like rehabilitation camps. Yeah, to prevent, you know, radicalism and the like. But it's pretty sketchy, dude. Well, if you think recently China's been in the news, the fact that the government has kidnapped the most famous, like, actress Chinese, actress. She did dodge

a lot of attacks, though. She dodged attacks, so they kidnapped her from fucking months, basically. I don't know a lot about China, but there's there's a lot. It's not a country I'd mess with the person? No. I find it much more threatening than a place like Russia. Do you? Yeah.

Because it seems... We seem to have it more together, don't they? Yeah, they're more secretive whereas, like, the Russian dude with Novichok comes over. Fux's... Postagee for hours. Sprays a door handle. with that perfume thing that's the poison

and then just throws it in the street like it's they don't know what they're doing but that's amateur shit that's like fucking hit-mails video game but then there's like China where it's like there's genuine censorship over certain things and it's all just really a bit

sneaky that's what sort of scares me about it is how little I know whereas we're told shit about Russia all the time like how evil they are Like China's like a, it's, I know, underdog, I wouldn't say underdog, but it's just like the one we don't know anything about it is immensely powerful. And no country will dare challenge them because of how important they are to the economy, yeah. But I've heard something about how like Tibet as well, there's always been issues of Tibet. And apparently like China's like causing issue there again, China is, is a powerhouse at the moment and it's gradually getting fucking bigger and there's things to why.

It's the, yeah, it's like the superpower. that all the older people are scared of like my grandmother's always going on about China and not in like a racist but way but in a they're such a power like if they went if there was a war involving China there'd be it would be felt worldwide not just in war but the fact that we wouldn't have products there'd be a massive stop on production everything hmm yeah so thing it'd be it'll be a big trouble if we wound up against them like

you hear stuff about like wussia having these top level cyber like cyber people to do like cyber attacks but it's like you don't hear anything about China's military or what they're doing it's all just

what the hell is going down with them I can't say it's somewhere like I really want to visit particularly it's not really on my radar um no I want to visit Hong Kong that's one definitely ones I want to visit but China not really it's like with all the smog issues they have there

it's like What about, like, you know, the Great Wall of China? I reckon that would be quite the sight to see. Yeah, but... Yeah, like you say, I wouldn't turn down a trip to China, you know? But if you're going to plan a trip somewhere, it's not the top of my list. No. I don't even know what their climate's like, really.

Hot. Because such a big place, like, surely it's all sorts of things, depending on where you want. Yeah, but it's all got this cloud. it's a grey smoggy cloud I know a bit about the history of China like romance of the three kingdoms and like the the wars of England there and all that

over fucking opium it's a quite interesting country but it's hard to add more to that other than the fact that they're dodgy I feel like it's countries like China India Japan who are going to

be the first countries to struggle, really struggle with the population. Major population crisis. I mean, they're obviously already feeling it. Well, India's a big one. Well, China especially, because they had the infamous one child

law, which did not go well. But then there's India where it's all just kind of... I was doing some Googling the other day because I just thought to myself, how many people are born and die like every minute or second or whatever?

yeah um and way more people are born a second than it's because medicine and stuff has progressed so far where we're just keeping people alive beyond arguably when they should be alive you know that's why there's the whole thing of old people are wise

it's because old people didn't live long you don't live long that's why back in their day it's like if you got to the age of like 50 you're like a fucking legend like a well so yeah like you can't have the population grow but not also have more space yeah or places for them to go as well just means everyone's losing space so like approximate numbers um I'm not sure when this is from it's just the first result on Google the each minute 250 people are

born at every minute to 105 people dying every minute it's over double the amount being born and dying so approximately 300 60,000 people being born a day, with 150,000 dying each day. So that's still about 150,000 people coming into the world every day? Yeah. That's not my... That's why when you look at graphs of population, it's like, yeah, yeah, whatever. And it's just, that's just the way it goes, isn't it?

It's like a bacteria spreading, almost. That's exactly what we are. What if the world, the earth, is an apple? And we're bacteria just on the surface. The whole population thing is a big issue. Like China, India, there's so much. And in Japan, it's just dropping constantly. But it's like even in Japan, that's small island,

they're like so compact. The fact they're trying to genuinely make cities underground, Evangelion style, because they've got no space. Well, they're thinking about doing that in London, because they've run out of space on top, so they're thinking, well, got to go under. I'd love an underground house. I belong underground

It would be horrible Jim It would be fucking awesome It has a real name Because it's a field of like study But I can't remember what it is Also You can't A building

Can't fall over Because of an earthquake If it's underground It can collapse in on itself They can crush you on the ground Trapped you on the ground Well we don't get earthquakes So that's fine for us

What's the solution though Like I feel like It's gonna have to be some kind of like really morally ambiguous fucked up government intervention thing. Like bringing it science fiction in

for a minute, like the genophage from Mass Effect where they just release some chemical and it just makes a load of people sterile or something. No, the thing is to me that's not even morally ambiguous. Really? If we ain't going to... See, this is the thing though, right?

Because... I'm happy to sacrifice my child for the sake of the world. So you're okay with a government taking your rights away, your human rights away? Well, yes, because otherwise we're just going to die anyway, so... Yeah, you've got to be pragmatic sometimes. Here's the thing, I'm just being devil's advocate. I could, like, I don't know, maybe justify it if everyone was in agreement.

But the problem is a lot of people aren't going to be in agreement. A lot of people aren't going to like the idea of some overpower, some overlord government. what if we vote for it like Brexit and then then comes in the scientific aspect of it is what is it just going to be everyone in like a place or are they picking shoes the genephase would be the one to do

because it's just like you can do it but everyone is like to yeah takes time then the only fit is survive and we make a better waste a better really interesting species right

the thing is humans like we don't like planning for problems like that We only react when it's a problem. Yeah, like an active problem. Like, there has to be some ridiculously huge disaster or something like that. Which is going to happen. Yeah, like maybe we'll see a country like China, India, completely collapse on itself and just be utterly chaotic.

And as a result, it might be like, well, we're already on the brink of destruction. Probably might, should do something about that. It's either new to like 70% of the world's population or find a planet. And finding a planet is probably the solution. That's the way we're going to go.

But it's really far away. Yeah, we're not even and we're not technologically advanced enough to pull that off. Tesla is. No. Luckily, there is some parallel with the population.

going like that with technology also going like that so who knows what we're going to be able to do in a hundred years what if we all go into virtual reality matrix no not like that silly shit like we all go that's more likely to me than finding like moons and planets to live on is some kind of some designer some engineer so we don't need space we can live our life in a little chair yeah some engineer finds some way to develop artificial intelligence to the degree where it can eliminate a lot of that wouldn't fix anything though because if we're sitting on chairs

how's the world going to move but what's going to happen we're just going to sit in chairs and die because we're going to die of old age but how we're going to eat how are we going to drink syringe yeah but someone's got to do that and for that to happen there's got to be an industry for there's got to be an industry there's got to be an industry there's got to be people working because it doesn't fix a problem

well unless like it goes Terminator style or Matrix style where we create we create life and they are far superior to us and they just are like look we don't care what you think we're going to organise you in a mathematical

scientific way and they just turn us into cattle basically I don't mind that if it's good for the human race it's good for me moo Anyway, let's bring it down a notch I'm a cow

This is the part of the episode where we Introduce meme chat Oh dear Have you been keeping up to date with memes Little Brother? No James Yes, the Russian memes

Russian memes Brill, fantastic Listen Not a lot has changed over the week Memes are a slow progression Unless something big Yeah, unless some music person releases a song that makes people lose their mind for one reason or another. All right, so bringing it back from last week, we got the Skyrim meme, destruction, speech, whatever.

Restoration. It's still going strong. Still going strong. Maybe even stronger. So if that's where... Yeah, at first it's like Reddit. Twitter, and then it spreads to Facebook. I have not seen them on Instagram.

I haven't seen them on Twitter, and I've seen them on Facebook. So maybe I've just got a good Twitter, but I haven't seen them. I've only got three here, by the way. So this is going to be a quick one chat. It's fine. It can be a quick one. So apparently not long ago, YouTube went down. Yes. It would have been, I can't, I guess, in the middle of the night for us in the UK.

YouTube went down for a few hours. You just couldn't go on any videos or do anything on the website. Yeah, lots of YouTubers tweeting about it. And then lots of memes were made. Yeah, not very funny. Sort of a, I don't, it's not a funny enough event for, The event isn't funny, so it's people desperately trying to make relevant thing funny. Yeah.

For likes and shares. So, in my opinion, weak meme. Yeah, I feel like ever since we've sort of revived meme chat, we haven't really liked any of the ones we talked about. Because, to be honest, most memes are shit. Yeah. Most memes are shit. Just drop of the truth bomb.

Most of them are bollocks. And going on from that, the most common, well, of course, there's still the, Moth Memes, which is dog shit. Mm-hmm. Meme, it's not versatile enough. It's not versatile, and it's... From the first time I've seen it, to the latest, there's... nothing has changed, and it hasn't made me laugh once.

It's not funny. Stop doing it. How many times can you warp that one punchline? That's the thing. Like, it's too restrictive. It's inherently too restrictive Yeah And you see like

The biggest Meme names on On YouTube Um Making videos Meme videos With the moth thing in it And it's like

Come on You can do better They just chase What's that was popular bro Exactly A moth man Bad man Wait what's Mothman

I'm just calling Moth MothMond Isn't Mothman Like a fallout thing No Mothman is like a urban legend

Oh really You know I used to find urban legends Like genuinely really scary I used to have a book of them Really? Yeah Because there's that part That it's that doubt in your mind

Yeah It's like what if this thing does exist Obviously it fucking doesn't I get scared very easily But something like A Moth man And we watched that video yesterday Of like Fallout

Just going through all the enemies from Fallout 76 or whatever it's called and a lot of them are based off kind of folklore and... Yeah, that's exactly what they are. Things like Mothman or the... It's the one from that PS4 exclusive game. Oh, the Wendigo.

The Wendigo, stuff like that. It's a Wendigai. Creepy. Genuinely creepy. And like our granddad told this weird story of like... Has he ever told you about it?

Because when he lived in Wales, in this little cottage by himself and he was like walking Max out in the in the fields and he said he met this woman who let him into like some cabin and like interacted with him

and then they went back to the same place the next day and the cabin was gone something like that and supposedly there's some weird like Welsh legend or some shit and like he's convinced that probably just drank too much whiskey that day yeah i it is i i do like a good scary story but i i'm not a believer of that sort of

shit although i do always have a little nibbling thing what if i take the bin out at night and tubercarb is just there something's there mothman's just there and he's just there and he's just chilling just looking at the light lobe where yeah he's like give me some any others any other memes um the last one i have is the printer explain the printer um there's another one as well which i guess you've forgot to note down we'll do that after the printer um so someone's got he's written like an essay and you need he needs to get it printed off right and it's in black and white obviously because it's just text on a white background black text on a white background and he's like printer print this off for me and the

printer says I need magenta as in the color magenta I don't I've never had a printer do that though I don't understand it it has black and white ink and it has coloured ink it has magenta cyan yellow is it just a joke that printers can be annoying surely it depends on the printer because mine yours is a mix but the more expensive, fancy ones have individual colours. Okay. But that's like...

That feels like a joke that should be on somebody's... When they're starting to do stand-up comedy. And that's one of their early jokes. Or printed on the wall in an office. It's just like... That's weak, man.

Weak as fuck. And then the one I showed you earlier, Thanos trying to get a printed picture of two gay black men. There's people desperately trying to warp like a meme into popular culture. Yeah. So like printer thing, not really funny. Let's put Thanos in there.

Let's put gay people. They're always funny. You're like crank the contrast up, don't you? And then put text all over it. Yeah. And there was that other one you showed, final one. I don't know if it has a name or something, but it's like, new invention.

that's right how the fuck would you even describe it so it's it's a regular meme but then inside the meme is another meme like square format saying this meme was made by something that is similar but different to the so for it did a pencil one explain that yeah so it's a it's like mechanical pencils are shit and that's in the main meme box and then the little box within that meme box is like made by original normal pencil oh yes I've seen them by like normal pencil gang yeah yeah and it's always thing thing gang whatever it is gang but it's not like that it's just picture with other picture in picture it just says made by X gang and can I just say I thought

meme chat was like a just a throwaway joke I don't know why he was suddenly actually made it a thing, but memes in general are shite. There's only one meme out of probably a thousand that's just funny because that's how quickly memes go and it's just like if you're just sitting there looking at those same memes every day, go on. I believe you can morph any of these memes to be funny, but it's just most of the time you don't see them. No, because they're not.

It is a tricky job to get that done. You just wait for that funny meme, that actual funny, once in a blue moon, funny moon, funny moon. Mm-mm-mm. Yeah. Unless it's got SpongeBob involved, then it's always a thumbs up from me. Not always. No, there's so many, Alex, if you're...

And I'm joking. If you're part of the car community, you'd see all the SpongeBob memes and just quench. Would you rather this anime character sit on your face or end world hunger? SpongeBob meme. Come on Alex, SpongeBob memes are low. And that about wraps it up for meme chat this evening. It won't be coming back, I'm afraid Are they ever?

Yeah I don't know I just find it funny that we just stole that from Keemstar What? Mem chat Yeah, he was going to create a podcast called meme chat

With like Leafy or some shit If I remember correctly Can we get Leafy on here? Did he mean chat? Because I showed his car So Oh shit

He's angry at me Because I showed him his Willie How do you guys feel about Why did you do that? What did he do? I'm a K-pop. Kauai.

I really hate hairdressers and getting my hair cut. Well, okay. Why? I explain your story. So, I can explain what I want. but I don't like the process. I don't like having to interact with people.

I never did. When I went to a hair dress, barbers, to get my haircut, it was just like, I have this, and I just sat in silence. Do they never ask you anything, though? No. My ones always say, like, so what you're up to today then?

My least favorite question, because it's always, get my haircut. I'm here. That's what you're doing. Yeah Well, so like What kind of That's awkward

What are you doing to say? It's such an annoying question It's like It's like Just give me more to work with You do It's such a like stunting questions No it's not

You just say Yeah I'm just You know That goes against the lesson I taught you yesterday To ask open questions The idea is that They get you talking

They don't actually listen To what you're saying But they're just focusing On getting up Yes but this is an issue right An issue I have where my voice is just the perfectly like terrible octave

where in any surrounding where there's other noise it just vanishes it's just like a drowning a drowning similar tone so you can't distinguish words and no one can understand me so if it's a busy hairdresser

there's music playing people all around and I respond with something clearly just don't hear what I say or the old you what sorry and then at that point I'm like

I didn't want to answer the question to begin with I wasn't interested in letting you know actually you should just walk out halfway through them cutting your hair just get angry and say that at one time it was so fucking bad because I was already in a bad mood that day I was sat down just tell him what I want

and he asked me a question and he says what you're up to today then the you know the go-toe one and um I just froze and it was just uh

and then it was like okay time's ticking gotta correct this or just leave it it's like the bar in a yeah yeah yeah more time kept going more time could go in and you left and then it was like too like said nothing for the rest of the the whole thing oh god that is really all this is what I mean like I'm not going there to have a conversation with people I'm going there to have my fucking haircut that's why I haven't

been in so long because it's such a process for me there's such an ordeal a mental fucking torture for me we see I haven't had my haircut in two years longer you're lucky over two years well well there's a thing I don't go to barbers I don't go to them because it's physical agonizing pain. How'd you get your haircut then? My sister does it. What do you mean physical agonizing pain? Like, I've stated this before.

My death perception in that eye is fucked. Yeah. So when they're trying to cut, like, that area of the hair, the cable's like there. So my eye sees it and it thinks it's super close. It's spasms to the point where I will pass out. Can't you close your eyes? No, because then you're like this,

and it's just like, you're using all of your energy sitting there trying to close your eye, and it's just like, I just want to put... No, because I look like a retard. Anyway, hold that note. We'll be back after these messages. Wait, so your eye...

You're going to have to explain that better. Have we not explained my eye story before? You've said it so many times. This eye spasms... Not on this show, about the... Have we not? Haircuts. Well, I've heard it a fucking thousand times.

Can't use my fucking mouse and keyboard because my eye spasms. You make me sound like a retard, but it's a genuinely life... It fucks up my life this fucking eye issue. It's not a joke. Because when you sit there, it's just like that side of my face is like drooping and shit. What does that have to do with a keyboard though? I can maybe a... Death of perception.

It just fucking spells... I don't know what it is, but when I sit there on a keyboard, like sitting back on my chat, it's just like, I can't do this. Maybe it's just like a true fucking gamer. I do, but it still fucks up my eye. Yeah, have it down here. Back, back, back to the... Anyway, hairdressers, yeah. It's close to my eye.

The perception is fucked because my eyes fucked. But you don't need to see anything when you get your hair cut. You can just close your eyes. No, but that's weird. So basically... You can just explain to them, look. Pull them aside. I got this fucking eye thing.

What do you need to do? It's like a little massage. If I ever get my hair cut again, I'm going to prove a point. I'm just going to close my eyes the whole time. No, but basically, okay, I went to it once because my hair gets long sometimes. Many at the top?

That's how hair works. Yes, you know? But mine goes stupid. curly. So it's mine. I tried to get it like this. I tried to get it like this and then I get it cut down. Restart the process, yeah. Yes. This is not a hard cut. It's a relatively 15, 10 minute cut done. Yeah, it's not like it takes mine much time. Okay, yeah. Those those five, 10 minutes are fucking agonizing and feel like hours. Okay, yeah, but it's like that, but then I'm sitting there like that. So basically, I went once, it was that bad that I was losing consciousness and I wanted to

vomit everywhere because my eye was just going non-stop. So since that day, I've got my sister to do it. Why I just have a normal conversation, catch up with her, and normally I can do that. Or I sit in a position where it's not an issue. Do you have like, does she cut

around your fingers while you're like that? No, because it's just like, I just move it. You're talking to the person who had issues sleeping because my eye was spasmer. I can't get my hair cap. My sister does it. And I save a lot of money. It's not that much money. It's like a tanner.

No, it's not, it's like 15 pound. I'm going to the wrong hairdresser, my boy. What one do you go to then? It doesn't matter. The point is, it's a tanner? The, um... Barbers. The comparison of...

Like, I don't envy, um, like, women getting their hair cut, because, um... Yeah, because they go into the hairdressers, come out. Nothing has changed, and it costs them, like, 200 pounds. Yeah. Now that is just straight up misogynistic, thanks. How's that misogynistic? It's just true. It's fact.

It's not like oppressing women or being mean to women. No, it's just old mean material. Yeah, it's old mean material. And typically their haircuts are more expensive. Yes, because it takes like 15 times the amount of time. And they get like nice head massages and... Well, you can. go to one and be like, I've got curly air.

Can you just, you know, do the jazz on it? And they'll be like, okay. Which you know what? Another issue I was having was, do you wash your hair before or after going? Before. Before normally. Because my hair's thick and...

So then you've got to wash your hair twice in the same day then. You don't have to, you just rinse afterwards. Yeah. You don't need to wash it with you. But then you're just washing all the moisture at your hair. What? What?

Liquid is moisture. If you wash your hair and use no product It just goes weird Mine doesn't Mine doesn't And I've got thick fucking hair Alex So mine is fine It washes out all the natural oils

Yeah if you're doing it for 15 minutes Maybe when you're just All the hair's out Boom You guys are fucking just haters I've got I've got thicker hair than you And I don't have a problem

Alex This is thick as fuck Oh my God Look really proving it okay what does that have to do with your head hair i reckon james does have thicker hair i have really thicker going by james's hair everywhere it's likely that james's head has more hair because his legs have more hair i don't think that's how it works i think there is something go on jim be the mediator then touch james's hair

i'm touching your hair okay No, but there's a difference between having thick and... Jim, you be the decider. That's impossible to know. Why? Because James... James has thick hair, but it's fine. You have thick hair, but it's curly. Yours is more curly than mine.

Look at the... you can see the curl. Mine's just... I don't know Oh come on Jim Everyone's like Wants to know I would say my hair's more My mind's more thick Like

Well the thing is If I say one of your You've got like a dick measuring contest Going on right now If I say that one of your hair Thicker than the other When I don't know But I just say one

For the sake of saying one One of you's gonna feel like Well he's got a bigger dick than me Well no Let's be mean and like his hair for the sake of knowing. Me and Alex's hair is very similar. We both go combed, we both go wrong.

Alex had an afro at one point. Borderline had a massive afro. So did I. Because our hair grows up instead of... Like down. It's just slightly different kind of coarseness, I guess, but it's kind of the same kind of thicky hair. It's just...

Mine's brown, his is blonde. Same hair. There is a difference, though. There is a difference. It's hard to say. Alex is much more kinky. Whereas James' is like... Look at Alex's hair

Mine is a lot more straight and normal His is a lot more curly Yeah, yours is more naturally curly It has kinks in it But when mine goes a lot longer It's curly as hell So it takes time But while Alexis is just straight out of the back curly

I don't fucking know man Anyway This is the second half of the show Where we go to Reddit Where we talk about massive epic moments in our favourite games and recently me and Jim have had epic moments in Rainbow Six Siege Alex doesn't want to know because he just doesn't want to know

because I don't give a fuck about Rainbow Six I'm sure that people are there that don't as well He doesn't appreciate good game of moments We've had so many good gamer moments in Rainbow Six I'm sure the people really care about hearing about Rainbow Six The thing is the thing is if you are a Rainbow Six player You really care but if you're not You don't care

Yeah it's just like any game And that's the That's the complex sort of... Anyway, if you want to ask us a question that we'll possibly answer, go over to the Jarm Media Reddit and there'll be a page or thread at the top. So recently, I've been time to play Leish and Moore and...

Anyway, today's first question comes in from Dibble Dobb who says, What were your first jobs? Any interesting stories? I worked in a dementia care home kitchen and had to fend off old people asking for knives. asking for knives My first job was I was a bin man

It was your first one was it Yeah I mean It seems so long ago now It was a long time ago It was like two years ago The bin man adventures It didn't last long

Because I hated it so much I wasn't strictly a bin man To start off with I worked in a factory Like wading through trash So I I've had those humble beginnings you know um from rags to ruins nothing funny really no like no funny stories apart from

any interesting stories it was dead rat on the conveyor belt fat ass huge ass dead rat and just watch that motherfucker maybe saying some good stories about the kinds of people that were like working yeah oh yeah the yeah they're just ignorant racist like voted leave on brexit sort of numpties apparently Michael Cain said he voted leave and got so much hate for it

um yeah the best the best thing to come from my time there was Freyer so if you go to my Twitter account at Jamie Beltman um

the plugging on the John Media podcast the banner of my account is a picture of the the Norse god Freya from this poster that just went by on the conveyor belt I picked it up and was like what the fuck what is this and it said like some frayer and some other shit on it yeah so I got home the second I sat down at my desk I googled that shit like I needed to know what this was I never found out like what the fuck it was but you found a picture I got the picture the very picture That's weird. But why was there a poster of it if you don't know what it is? It was a poster on the conveyor belt. Somebody had thrown it in the rubbish.

But what is it? I thought you found out what it was. It's not like a TV show from the 80s or something. That's the thing. I don't know. Because I just googled it and I could find images, but nothing else. Okay. James? Well, you've talked about my... First job. Was that shitty car garage?

garage. So he worked in a garage. What did you actually do? It was an accident repair centre, so cars involved in accidents would go there to get repaired. So just a normal car. You're an apprentice, though, so... I was an apprentice. What could they actually make you do that you were capable of being able to do? I did not. There was no difference between an apprentice and someone works there full time. You were slave labour. Four pound 50 an hour, or three pound 15 an hour to just do the shit everyone else gets paid like 16 pound for. But, like, you can't just start a job like that and just...

You sit with the guy with like a week and it's just like, do it, boom, take cars apart, paint stuff, prep stuff, all that. Yeah. Like, it was a shit job, unbelievably shit, shit pay, 8 till 5.30 every day and weekends. Really? Just fucks up your life, lunged, destroyed, came home, like, depressed, tried to kill myself a few times, joined that thing. dude. God, that was a dreadful Yeah, it was horrible.

It was like, I'd go there just like riding my motorbike crying because it's just like, it was that bad, like I didn't want to go. Why did you stick with it for so long if it was that bad? Because I was scared.

Like, I was young. I was like 16, 17 at the time. So you don't, you're not an adult. You don't know what the real world is. And I just ran away from it. I was just like, I'm in tears. I'm going home.

Did you? I can't remember, because you didn't go sick for him, did you? No, I went, I went to college. I did a motor sport. You did one year at college then went straight into that.

I did a motorsport like diploma thing and I fucking ace that. For one year? Yeah. Then into the apprenticeship. Yeah. Because I wanted a job

because it was so we'd go to two years and so in two years in college and I wanted money I wanted to actually get somewhere. Mm-hmm. So I did this shit apprenticeship and it was awful. Hated it, went away,

left it. Then joined that shit office job that was shit awful. It got paid like shit, left it. Got hired again by the same person he was shit, left it. great and I was just in retail

I don't know if there's anything really interesting about it I think your first job's always just unbelievably shit yeah I think that's how it normally it goes I don't know if anything funny happened I learned some things about there's way more crime than you expect that goes on that they just can't do anything about

they can report them to the police but I mean they're probably not going to do anything unless it's like really severe I think like the first job's always shit but it's a good place to learn about yourself like you to me I never learned anything about myself in school everything about myself I learned out the first year is outside of school because that's when you actually have a personality yourself you're not influenced by anyone yeah one good thing that it did force me to do was just interacting with strangers learning how to

communicate that's what my second job was good for yeah that's what my job it puts you out your comfort zone which needs to happen for you to grow that needs to happen no matter what if you avoid that you're just going to be a

kid for the rest of your life things are never going to like change so like I did bar work at my second job and that type of stuff wedding stuff and it's just like if you do that stuff you become a lot better in yourself and you're just a better person a couple things I did find

kind of interesting were basically coming into in contact with scammers kind of like better cool soul not as like suave and awesome as that character but like the real life yeah like the actual real life

what that kind of thing is based on where there are a couple like I remember someone who came in with just the packaging of like a 15 pound steak still sort of of like bloody in the in the plastic and he was like insisting a refund for it um and he

he managed to somehow get the refund in cash and then just left because because they're like they're like full on they've got an aggressive personality they don't let it slip and they kind of pressure them into handing over the money and apparently he was like notorious for doing that and stuff it's really disgusting how people can just get away with them and on one of the days where it was like really busy and there was a huge queue that's when these specific type of people come in they get in the queue they buy something really small for like one pound like an awkward amount one pound 70 let's say and they pay with like a 20 pound note and then as you're getting the change ready um they start pulling out other um they might pull out a fiber and say oh could you just

swap the change for this fiver um so like you're and they they just keep like passing you things and like changing the amount and getting new cash out with the intent of trying to trick you into giving them more money than um then um then whatever they paid for yeah so you're just giving them money for for free or whatever but the this this one guy pushed his luck he did it one time to me and he must have tricked me and got some money from the register but then he got back in the line and tried to do it again and by then I was like okay this is weird but he'd given me all the money back to try and get me to get more yeah but I'd put it back in and then I was like this is this is weird I'm just gonna call someone and then he just like quickly just got out oh damn weird experience

like I didn't know people did that kind of thing people are dodgy like especially desperate board line 100 plus shoplifters going every single day well apparently there are these like there's just this kid who like every day on a certain week on the dot

would just come in like as it opened just go to the donut aisle just take like loads of donuts and just walk out there's nothing they could do about it because you're not allowed to like touch people and grab them and they can suit you

it's just like you when you're okay it's my inspiration It's like you fucking I could walk in and still shit and nothing's going to happen to me It's fucking lawless Like the world in some ways it's generally like fucking lawless

That is so ridiculous So many things in society are based on Kind of the fear of consequence Yeah If there are people out there who are willing to push the boundaries Because it's not to say like You could you could think man I've heard that it's easy to shoplift

And just on that day, it happens to be one of the days where there's, like, a police officer around, they spot you, then you've got a record. And you get arrested and boom, 12 years. You get a record and then you can never get a job that you're like job again. It's like we did that because loads of people get over it. Then there's like time in my family who didn't. A box and mortiseers. Mm-hmm. Fucking police at my door.

Yeah. Like, everyone does that. Like, that's supposed to be the deterrent. Like, you don't want to be the one. Mm-hmm. one but for every one of those there's like 20 that there's there's 50 old people successful and do it every day you know yeah it should be it should be like law for like just a bodyguard to be able to slam dunk the one to the floor like giving

those donuts back boy Alex no but on the subject of that why shoplift just buy it poor people that's different though but like normally like how many people do you think like a lot of people do it for like a thrill or see if they can get away with it or to kind of rebel bored people yeah just I've never had it's never been female mind but I've been a shop seen something but I'm just gonna lick it I'm just like I don't have enough money I'm not gonna buy it a young teenager I stole a few things nothing major though no like like a couple of sweets no from the pick a mix actually saying that Did we ever talk about the whole game DLC thing? I feel like that's pretty scummy. We mentioned it before, but the Tesco in one of our local towns,

it was like the entertainment aisle with all the like video games. They'd always have empty boxes as you do so you don't... Yeah, of course, they'd take the disc out. They'd have the box, but you'd buy that box, but they just put the disc in with the manual. But that means that box had all the DLC codes and extra slide gold. Yeah, they left all the like codes that you get with your... So when we found it, we stood there and just took pictures of all the codes and just... Is that how you got the codes?

I was thinking, how did you get the things out without anybody needs to? Some of them I took, some of them I took pictures of. Forza. I got used something to do with Forza. I managed, I really wanted the Mass Effect 3, like, beta thing that came with Battlefield 3. Oh, yeah. So I just took that out of the Battlefield 3 case. it's such a petty

it's such a petty fine though you stole some pre-order bonus this is how I justify it in my head is that that's like their ineptitude yeah that's them like being stupid because normally that's not something you could do any thief could justify it that way though like they let me get away with it so

this one this one is like clearly the people who are putting the games out I have no idea like what they're actually selling because that was back when the online pass was the thing and they're 15 fucking quid yeah so if you took the online you're basically taking that paper you're you're for game like battlefield 3 which it was only the multiplayer yeah they're buying a game that's what I mean do you not feel bad for no because me wanting to play mass 5 3 was greater than my guilt for taking it away for something no but to be honest we never did online passes we weren't that's coming

Alex did because of mass effect faded that was the one I did I did it once I needed for the And like, compared to what some teenagers get up to, that's nothing. It's really innocent. Oh, I saw some... Well, I don't think I've ever stolen anything ever from a shop or anything. I haven't either. Alex was one who did it for us, so it's Alex. It's not on us.

You can get away with, like, I don't... I didn't feel guilty when you'd steal one of those things for me, if you ever did or... Yeah, I definitely did. Yeah, I'm pretty sure you stole something to do with Batman, aren't you? Yeah, yeah, I did. No, wasn't it the Wobbins stuff? No, um... What was the period of bonuses for, Icom City?

It was like the Joker fight thing. Yeah, yeah, that's it. And I was jealous. So, like, I don't know, can you collect me some DLC? But that was where I think about it was like this weird thrill I got from it, though, so I can kind of understand them. Alex has the mind of a thief. But yeah, there's like, you don't get guilty when you get someone to steal something for you. Mm-hmm.

But I could never overcome the guilt of stealing something myself. Yeah, I've never done it, so I haven't, no. Do you know what's something that always just makes me a bit weird? It's when you see people in shops, they pick up a drink, start drinking it, and put it in the trot. It's just like, it's not your item. Like, you see it a lot. Yeah, that does annoy me.

I'm just like, they could just... Like the milk. The dude drinking milk at the start of the Big Lobowski. He does pay for it, though, to be fair. Yeah, no, that's what we mean there. Like, it's kind of weird to start drinking something before you've paid for it. Like, I could not do that. Like, if you're really thirsty and you're, like, dying, maybe going to shop and be like,

I need a drink, because that's kind of human whites level. Just, you need to drink. Sometimes you see, like, parents and they're, like, give some, their kids some grapes or something. But it's just like, no, but let's be people, with kids in chief markets. You shouldn't give kids grapes that aren't cut in half, though. That's danger. Why? That's the most.

No, that's the most common thing little kids choke on. No, but if you're a thief, you don't steal stuff. You just bring a kid into the shopping market and they'll steal shit. I still shit as a kid because it's just like, hot wheel car. You walk out. I did that a lot. I stole something by accident when I was a baby. You do?

You stole like a soft toy, didn't you? Yeah. And it was like my soft toy for years to come from Jersey Zoo. It's just like with a kid does it. It's just like, you know, it's just like pure innocent. to it, they're not intentionally trying to break with it. It was like, oh, teddy bear. I like teddy bear. So I grabbed

it, had it in the pram with me, and my mum just left without even notice. It's just like, you can't, you can't, like, question that, because they could have just had that with them, you know, when they walked in. So you can't really. You're not going to steal a toy from a baby, are you? No. Like, take it back.

You know there's some people with, they'll be like, that toy's got the label on it, it's ass. So Alex Scott 1811 says Thoughts on the Inbetweeners I think I've seen Alex mention it However I'd like to hear

All of your thoughts Yeah Well tough luck Buttercup Am I the only one who's seen any of it I don't care about the opportunes I've never The only thing I know is

I've never watched it I've just never watched it It's never It's never of humor to be honest i watched it i must have what binge watched it when i was in first year of sick form or something yeah people the perfect age for it yeah people raved on i found it really funny at the time um it's been a long time obviously um i heard the movies weren't very good but movies based on shows like that often aren't yeah but i remember it being funny and like

kind of capturing that english school thing quite well Never watched it Some fucking cringe questions, I gotta say Meme lover 26 says not a question But I'd like to say how great James has been in the latest episodes His funny levels have increased greatly I love James Uh I don't think that's true Well they said it

Pufat 99 says What is the worst movie you ever seen? No, I'm not talking about Transformers to or grown-ups to I mean a movie's so bad, so fundamentally broken that it leaves a pit in your stomach or makes you frustrated and angry beyond any reasonable measure No, no, but those questions,

it normally goes down to the meme answers like the notoriously bad movies. That's a quote from, that was the old, such of the worst intro. Well, when it, I picked up on it when he said the pit in your stomach I like that intro

The worst film Like it's even worse than the meme films It's Transformers 2 It's fucking atrocious Like There's that one scene everyone goes to Though in that movie That they think is good

Riches There's like an Optimus Prime fight In a forest or something That scene's lame as fuck I'd have to watch it again I've think of any scene at once Because the actual context of the scene Is lame as fuck

Obviously not the context but just the action I think, yeah, but with Transformers, the scenes all look bad post Transformers 1 have pretty good CGI for Transformers well, and then it was just like Play-Doh. Yeah, why does the CG in Transformers movie seem to get worse? It does get worse. In each sequel. More cynical and lazy, I guess. It's the same reason, like, on a cinematic level, the Jurassic Park movies arguably

kind of look worse than the original one back in the day in a lot of ways. Obviously, the CG isn't as good in the originals, but like the techniques and the way it's shot is way more creative. There's clearly more fake in the new ones. Yeah, like less real sets and shit. Those people want to know what we think about BoJack, but I think I'm the only one who's seen it, so. I've seen four seasons. I mean the new season. Oh, right.

Well, I'm sure it's excellent. What? Well, we haven't talked about the new BoJack. season but you don't watch it do yeah so i'm the only one i don't watch anything maybe when jim finally watches it at some point which won't happen in the next like three months well i've got to finish mad men you've got finished red dev redemption for six six times first this is the last jarcast this is the last shut up so what happens it's seven days until it's out and don't make it feel like it's any less than that it's

It's not acting like seven days is a long time. It feels like a long time. Alex, it is a long time. Imagine like the best thing ever in your life is going to happen in seven days. How long this seven days? Those seven days last like a year. It's like, oh my God. It's bedtime, yes, on the first day.

Maybe when I was a child looking forward to Christmas. Oh, shut up. Being a child, it was like, it would take a month to get to the 18th. And then it's just like from there, it's like doesn't end. Now things just sneak up on me, though. And it's like, oh, shit, that thing. That's because you do things, but I don't. Like, I put a date in my calendar for a movie I was looking forward to

that was out only in this one little cinema. And I just completely missed it. And I was like, oh, shit, I just remembered I put the date of that movie coming out. I looked and it was like the week after it had come out. Exactly a week to the day. I was like, oh, I miss it. With time, with time, it's like the more, the older you get. the more you've experienced at the time goes faster.

Is that the way it works? That's how, like, are relevant. Yeah, taking away the moments that make up a doll day. So it's like... Because one year when you're two years old, one year is half of your life. But now that I'm 21, it's a 21st. It's like that. So now it's like...

Like someone who's 60 has lived three of our lifetimes, so... Yeah, so... So our... being 20 is like such a long time ago for them whereas for us that's our whole life so now I don't make any any there's no dates in my diary I literally live just day to day just goes on goes on

that's the way to be sometimes you have to no I used to be like oh I've got to do so on the weekend then I'd just be like unhappy till I did that because I had to do it so you guys have put me in a bad mood now though bringing up Red Dead Don't think about it

Well this is the end of the show guys Well Jim just think of it this way Just think of it this way You're thinking of Red Dead I'm thinking of buying engine mounts my car We're getting them the same time It's not the same though It's the same because my car will go faster

Thank you for watching this episode of the genre media podcast We'll catch you on the next episode of Red Dead Redemption 2