JAR Media Posdact - McFarlane Modroc Melodrama - JARCAST Episode 185

Episode Date: September 23, 2019

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/jar-media-store Twitter: https://twitter.com/FourFunnies

Good afternoon. Morning. Uh, line. Evening. Evening. Or night, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the Aricast, where we stand Ariana Grande 24-7. Not me, I don't.

He stands Lana del way. Not me, I don't. No, I don't. Don't lie about me and embarrass me in front of the charlings. I'm Jamie, um, codename grande. Uh, this is James to my right. James code name Swift. And I'm Alex code name Lord.

It doesn't work. We did last names. You've got to be D. Alex code name Duh. Thank you. There you go. Just like to quickly shout out the Patreon. over at Patreon for supporting our, for being

patrons. The best. The best. For being patrons. For helping us. Yeah, like we like do a thing and they are patriots. For those, I don't know if you can hear it in the background, but Argi is literally howling. He's been doing this for last like hour non-stop.

Alex, throw your bottle up. You working me go, Aggie! It's better. No. Anyway, just ignoring. it if you can hear it in the background if you can't ignore it it's really quite pissing me off also thank you to the guys that got our shirts and and gals because yeah good shirts inclusive and stuff you know there's both you know types of person i wear my jar shirt quite often actually he's just going to start any moment now anyway uh how are we doing everybody

Fantastic! Um, I was sick earlier. Oh. Sorry to hear that one for you. Twice. Um, let me think we have any housekeeping from last episode. Um, I just spoke Luke's age rule and myself. Well, whose fault is that?

It's not mine. It's pink. Pink the singer's fault. How dare she? First, I just want to start by saying... Fuck the Nazis. That's how I want to start. That's a good point. the Nazis I fucking hate Nazis finally someone is brave enough to say to say

something about it because it's really been in the back of my mind that I'm just like no that's the thing like people don't want you to talk about this but you know what if you're a Nazi I don't like you yeah you should we want to we should probably talk about like I might I'll just edit this bit out like should we leave that in or like it's kind of risky no I mean no you're right now take out yeah don't worry about it that up. Just so like just go back in a way I can edit

around it. How radical? You know what? Fuck the animal abusers. No again. You might piss off people who do abuse animals. It could be a whole thing. I don't know about that.

We can't bring controversy to charge him. How about the establishment? Yeah, but then the establishment might get a bit. The government might like... Yeah, shut us down. Tracus or something. What about group think? Send drones after us.

Group think. How about just idiots? Nah, you can't do that. F off idiots. No, because nobody wants to accept that they're an idiot. We're... Podcasting is just a minefield, I tell you. Yeah.

You can't talk about anything anymore. Any step and you're going bang. Oh no, I've got one. Oh yeah, go ahead. You know what? Fuck Seth MacFarlane. Oh shit Yes

I agree with this one Nothing has resonated quite like that With me One of my favourite job moments Is when James Like got super passionately angry At Seth Macvalin Like just out of note

I don't even understand why Because he's a funny guy He leans to the left He can dance He can animate He's left wing So automatically James loves him

No that's not the case Idiot Yeah the amount of money He's given to the Democrats It's just off the chain all I will say is that I forget about him and when I remember that he exists

I get angry We need to talk about this We need to talk about Family Guy for a moment And not in like a Brian death scene funny funny way Like seriously Because we found out the other day That James please tell me you know

About the family guy chicken fight right Chicken fights Didn't we watch a video about that recently No I'm asking you a question So yes or no question Do you know about the chicken from Family Guy? Yes. Do you know the backstory?

Yes. Why then? There was a coupon and it was out of date and they started fighting. Fuck me. It really is up to date on his family guy. It's because of the video we watched. Well, that's research. Like that counts.

It doesn't not count. But imagine a chicken fight but with Peter Griffin fighting Donald Trump. That is real. I mean, like it's hilarious and it's groundbreaking comedy. and groundbreaking animation like he's got little hands he's got tiny hands and like he's got orange like makeup on his face and it gets wiped and then they're like what though he's wearing makeup oh yeah and his hair like goes all like do do yeah ha funny kind of stuff like what if a what if a cartoon had like someone fighting obama when

Obama was president you know yeah but there's literally an Obama joke in that family guy Yeah, he like makes out with Obama. No, like they're fighting. Peter Griffin and Donald Trump are fighting and they like hit a picture of Obama off the wall and then Peter Griffin goes over and slowly picks up the like portrait of Obama and puts it on... No, he kisses it, then puts it back up on the wall.

Seth McFarlane, he's got that subtle comedy. He doesn't hide his political opinions and that's what's so kind of brave about him, you know? Yeah, it's really brave. Really sort of avant-garde, like artistic? No, because it is necessary to, like, criticize your government, you know? Otherwise, you end up being in a place like Russia, you know? Or China.

And so basically what Seth MacFarlane is doing is fighting communism. Single-handism. In a sense, yes. Yes, yes. There's nothing even to say about that episode of Family Guy. there's not much of a family guy in general I had low opinions of family guy already like there are loads of really bad episodes

loads of really tasteless jokes and like just just bad writing all round but when I saw the thumbnail of Peter Griffin punching President Trump like in Family Guy I was like surely not this must just be a cutaway guy but no it's like a whole episode based around Peter Griffin

like no the story is actually so predictable that it's like Seth MacFarlane, are you actually, like, blind? Do you have no idea how on the nose you're being right now? Oh, I know it would be a great idea. Meg gets her pussy grabbed by the president, and then Peter fights him for 25 minutes.

There you go, episode then. The thing is, it goes just like that because he doesn't care anymore. He doesn't care. Yep. You know? As they say, family guy died with Brian. Surely he doesn't have any.

creative input on it anymore. No, he does. He, like, writes all of them, doesn't he? I don't know about that. He, like, co-writes. He definitely does the funny voices. Ooh-hoo-ha. I'm pretty sure he co-writes most of them.

Well, he does all the voices. He does, like, most of the voices, so there's no way he couldn't, you know, have some creative input in there. He's more obsessed with the Orville, though. That's what's important. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Where's Ted 3, Seth? Yeah, where's Ted 3, Seth? Huh? Where's Pineapple Express 2, sir? Seth, huh? Yeah, bitch. Like, and on, um, Empire, this, like, film website did, like, the ranking of, like, the hundred best films of the decade. Ted is in it.

Quite high. Well, low. I don't know. Is it... The point is, it's in the list of, like, a hundred movies. Ted. I bet... I used to like Ted when it came out, because I was, like, dumb and young.

Go? But I rewatched it recently. It was like, this. is actually so bad. It's awful. This is so fucking bad. How did you like it? Even then I hated it of a passion.

Because Seth MacFarlane appeals to teenagers. Yeah. Like edgy teenagers. Yeah. And that's it. I'm the edgiest teenager there was and I hated it. No, but you're also like so counterculture that like he's too popular for you to like him. Yeah, 100%. Like if you were the first one to discover Rick and Morty before anyone else did, you would have

loved it and be like, you have to see this. I don't think that's true. I don't think James would have ever liked Rick and Morty. He liked Archer though. That's because I didn't have an opinion. I was just an echo of you. Ooh. Archer's shit, though.

That show is worse than Family Guy. Fuck Archer. I don't think it's worse than Family Guy. No, it's not worse than Family Guy, so at least it looks nice. Looks nice. It's more pleasant to watch. The early season is pretty rough.

Yes, but I mean, it's just nicer. It's just a thing with adult animation. like yeah just has to be ugly for some reason yeah i don't get it family guy's repulsive to look at the simpsons was decent for a time the simpsons used to have like pretty decent animation for what it was doing but it appealed to like everyone that's the thing yeah but like just on like an animation basis you know like it wasn't just family guy everything is like a flat angle and the the same like reuse of like certain poses that they just go between it's like um what was that thing what was it called

Oh fuck Go animate Go animate yeah Yeah Every episode looks like it's made in go animate Go animate Yeah what's my point Yeah

Make Pineapple Express 2 Seth Yeah get off your ass And actually do some work for a change How about that Seth You know like All of it was like Excellent and everything Like really incredible actually

But it's not enough Give us Neighbours 3 Seth Bad Neighbys Don't be Pumbar in the Lion King 2 remake. Yeah. That's enough Seth Macphile and talk. Yeah, I can feel my anger growing. Just a quick aside, if you want good news...

Actually, no, I'll just tell you. On JAR Twitter, like, a few weeks ago, um... I, in a moment of weakness, thought it would be incredibly funny to you know what one of you just go on JAR Twitter right now get your phone out

that you have permission to go on your phone go on JAR Twitter and have a look at the the likes okay have a look at the likes and tell me when you get there start scrolling and tell me what you start to see

in the likes there Jim's not for showing me because I have no clear what this is no trust me on the likes yeah like JAR Media's likes on Twitter and just start scrolling, because they'll be, this was a little, a few days ago now.

Oh, Christ. Anyone at home can do this as well. Oh, fuck, say, no, Alex, no. What have you done? Alex, what have you done? Alex. I don't even know how to explain it or if I should just leave it at that. Like, people can go and look if they want.

Yeah, but it doesn't mean anything to them. No, it does. Oh, really? Some people know. We've talked about it many times. We've referenced... Alex, nobody's going to know. They will.

If you know, go in the comments or post on the Reddit if you know, okay? This is on JAR, media, Twitter, likes, okay? Alex, you all know it, is he active? Is he active still? No, unfortunately not. I do have a topic, a little funny, funny one. Oh, shoot me. A little hilarious one.

Doesn't shoot me with it, not shoot me. So I came across this website called ImageNet Roulette, where the premise is, I'll just read the premise. ImageNet roulette is a provocation designed to help us see into the ways that humans are classified in machine learning systems. It uses a neural network trained on the person categories from the ImageNet dataset, which has over 2,500 labels used to classify images of people.

It is currently on show as part of the Training Humans Exhibition by Trevor Paglin and Kate Crawford at the Fon... I keep getting these words I can't read, guys and it makes me look like a dummy. Okay, let me see, let me read it. It's like a place. What's that?

You say it. Fondazione. Fondazione, Prade Museum in Milan. It's just any word that's not English. So basically, wait, Jim, do that funny line that's in like every fucking piece of media everywhere where they're like, okay, how about now in English, please? You just did it, though? No, but do it. Come on.

Don't do it, yeah. No, I'll edit out my bit and then it sort of sound like seamless. English, please? No, in it. No, that's what they do. Oh, how about an English please, Doc? God, no, he's going to stop the do thing again. How would you deliver that line, though, James?

Would you mind repeat in English, please? Okay, that was kind of cool. Okay, okay, okay, we get the Fondayzone Museum. Right, but listen, this is the basic premise. You upload a picture, like, of your face, and then it, like, analyzes it, and it, and it, like, it gives you a, a classification of some sort. Okay, okay. shoot for example who shall i do first because i've done all three of us what what are you like splicing us with you're not spliced with anything you just upload a picture of yourself right and it reads

it and it out of those 2,500 options it like gives you like a type of person that you oh okay okay well what photos did you use um for james it's your one-off instagram where you're like brushing your teeth oh fuck that one what's mine That's a good photo. It's about to be fucked up. It's that one. That was off of James' though.

Yeah, I just used James' Instagram. Who do you want to start with? Where's yours? Do you haven't seen your photo? Mine's just like a really basic,

just in the bathroom. Really? That's bullshit, so you give me and James like the freaky creep ones. Well, I just didn't have random perfect portraits of you guys

just on my phone. James uploaded a funny picture of you. This is horseshman. That was too fine. No, no, but. Trust me, this is worth it. Okay, do your one first. No, mine...

Okay, I will do my first. Surely it's the most boring. Apparently, I'm a... Bursar. The treasurer at a college or university. So a person, individual, someone, somebody... Money handler, money dealer,

treasurer, financial officer. Burser. Burser. So I'm a fucking burser apparently Is that all that it's given? Yeah, that's all it does It just like It pins you down to one word

Bursa Okay Mine Jim's is the funniest You're ready Yeah Jim Orphan

A child who has lost both parents Jameses Jameses might be better actually Am I adopted? No, Jim, you all love James' one. James' one is non-smoker, a person who does not smoke tobacco. What the fuck?

Yeah, how weird is that? What? Non-smoker, that's... literally says it right here I'll tweet all of these images so but if you're watching or listening you can go to JAR Media Twitter and see the results and

go to the website yourself and try it out if you want to see what you get it. How does that photo bring up non-smoker? Is it because I'm brushing my teeth? Is that it? I don't know. Surely it sees too fresh. Why would it do that? Surely it should see something in your mouth and think, smoke it?

Yeah. Topless on a, taking shit on a toilet, while brush my teeth. Are you doing a poo in that picture? Yes. That's cool. I think we're all doing a poo in each of our pictures. How just... Oh, I definitely was.

How? You need to try these variations of different angles and see what comes up. Yeah, it's not like a definitive, like, anything. It's just a funny... Bursa. Funny little thing. Bursar, orphan and non-smoker What was the

The topic you gave to me to have as my topic Shit, what was it? James, you're the one of the memory We were in the living room Was something on the TV Um Shit, what was it? Fuck, man

Was it to a game or something, I think Wasn't family guy No, you gave me that to do last week shreddies last week I did shreddies instead well you told me to do shreddies but you know what I mean it's really really pissing me off

it's right that I hate when this happens when like the memory you know your memory is in your head you know it's there yeah but the it's like the the road to that memory is crumbling or covered in like sheep and the car

can't like get past it's like really slow get out the way you stupid sheep i'm walking you don't do don't get to my memory here borderlands what are we talking about you talking about we got to go through it what no you're just what uh kebabs we were eating kebab and we were talking about borderlands and gears of war and it was way that yeah yeah it's nothing to do with that uh we'll remember like after the episode I had a rock star the other day that had Gears of War on it. Oh really? Should have given me the code?

Yeah, I should have done. You should have given us the code since we're buying it. You guys are dorks. I'm a fucking cool dude that fucking goes and shreds on my guitar while riding the skateboard at the club, you know, getting fucked up and stuff and slaying fucking clunge. To call it that, please, if you must. dude

do you guys remember this is like the deepest of jar media cuts okay shoot me do you remember comment corner yeah

I remember comment corner but I don't remember comment corner I remember comment corner what was do you remember what comment corner was you did comment corner on IG

no I didn't it was a jar thing You did something similar on IHC? Yeah, comment comeback on I actually... No, you did like a segment where you'd read comments and I was always in them. Yeah, that was commenter. Yeah, I get that, I was, uh, yes. Yeah, but I quickly, like, just for a little nice one,

I wanted to do a comment corner based on last week's comments. What is comment corner? who was just you know bringing up some of the comments seeing if they're funny well get in your corner then I'm already in there give us some comments from in the corner

I'm in the corner I'm sorry bro fuck off you need to drive you can't drink this I want a drinkie ah drunky what you're doing

please know our whoosh says or said on the episode last night I had a dream where Alex was in my house for some reason and he just started talking

shit about my friend Alex's like dream self is evil and horrible it's just what the fuck it's like he's blaming me for my dream being it's like his video game self

that they are the same person yeah Alex's video game characters seeping into all of our dreams Alex's just like deepest innermost evil is being exposed upon people Is it like

In a form of dream realm Is it like Peter Pan with like my shadow It's like Yeah Kind of villainous Yeah like the flip side The the opposite realm Being dreams

The realm where there's no Like rhyme or reason to anything That's where your flip shadow self Resolve You're just talking about persona Literally It's all you're talking about that Maybe the DMT elves

You know That are activated in your sleep Yeah Could be something to do with that Yeah in the dream realm like the LCD um sound system like area this kind of a neurological network of like interlocking systems do you know i mean james yeah it's like um some sort of like social strand sort of system

yeah like a revolutionary kind of new design of communication like a genre of the like let's just call it social strands like just make it simple yeah let's just copyright yeah yeah yeah Yeah. Bibby and Bob said, true facts about fart sickness. Farting is just breathing without lungs. Farting isn't an official sport, it is a necessity. The world's first fart was accidentally released. Pussies can fart too.

Also women. The clone army is coming, Alex. Get ready for farting. That's bullshit. That is bullshit Do you guys look at the comments ever? I fucking hate comment corner This is shit No, do you want about this one?

From Claim Girl James being betrayed by his friends ellipses James is Drake Oh shit Go on, go on pop off in a Go on James Your favourite Drake song

She say do you love me I don't let me partly I remember. I took Xanax on a plane 10 hours till I land out like a light. Like a light. Yeah. Like a light. Oogabuga said,

You say Doctor Who doesn't traumatise children but it literally had nightmares about the weeping angels for months and I still feel uneasy whenever weeping angels come up today. You fucking idiot. You fucking idiot. Oh, James died. What the fuck was that?

What did James do? He just, like, vomited on the sofa. What the fuck? What the fuck? Why did you do that? Do you think I could hear it out of the corner of, like, my ear? Bro. Dude.

I can stop. You got a bit of, like, vomit on your jaw. It's the biggest. Why did that happen? Do you know, it's when you burp? And he gets stuck in your mouth and you can't do anything. Oh, fuck, that's the first time that's happened. And it's a fabric sofa too.

Yeah, it's just going to stay. I can't help. Oh, I'll argue. We'll come and look at it up sooner or later. It was just pink rooseid anyway. You can have to see that, Alex. Let's do one more from Cherry Rabbit. Cherry Red Cherry.

I used to play geeks, and I really enjoyed the game. They are fun and quirky, but the mascot I can understand and why you dislike him. Fair enough. Thumbs up. Wait, do we have no one complaining about a shit-talking Banjo? They must have thought we were joking about Banjo, but we actually mean that he's shit. My son looks funny enough. Oh, James, you idiot one. Well, that was Comment Corner, everybody.

Three Cheers for the Commenters. Alex, do a little song thing for a Comment Corner. corner three cheers for comment corner baby three cheers you know when you like do something and then just immediately regret it i mean yeah but that wasn't me just now because that was no that was me getting you to do that but why what was wrong with that that's that diffy that was actually good let's just move on that that's got a comeback every episode no three cheers the comment come back corner, aren't it? You should comment

comeback corner? Yep, that's what I said, that's what I meant. The KKK. The CCC. Yeah, it would be CCC, wouldn't it? Oh, don't even bother. You know, they intentionally

misspelled Klan to seem more scarier. Yeah, to make it KKK. So it's not KFC. Alex just fucking revealed the deepest fucking conspiracy KFC was founded by the KKK That's

going to be the headlines tomorrow The B-Clux The B-Clux. Oh, Jesus Christ Three cheers Keep going that I need to hear this

No, because Jim's like I can see the disappointment in his That's his own fault And he's the host He's the host like He's shit. Jim, your fucking shit. How fucking he even

fucking let you fucking do that? This is fucking bullshit. Like, I put myself out here in this scenario, in this situation, in this seat, and then you're gonna sit there on the fucking sidelines

and just fucking spew this, this, whatever the fuck this is towards me. Viceroli. This viscera. No, viscerol. This pure fucking viscera.

You're going to spit it. No, visceroli. This visceroli just in towards me. How, why do we keep going if this is the way we treat our company? You know? What's the, why, what is the point of us doing this if this is how it's going to go? You kind of have a point. Do you understand what I'm saying?

Yes or no? No. He didn't even understand the fucking. social strand thing like he's just I don't think James is in it I don't think he is explain it explain the social strands no he's not in it

he doesn't feel as though he's in it so he's not in it we're in it you're in it I'm in it he's not in it I think it just simply comes down to like a basic hierarchical belief

structure that's like it's like you said the hierarchy you mean a pyramid screen James sees it but he doesn't believe it let's just get some mod rock and just put it around his head and then have a perfect cast

Oh that Mod rock How the fuck do you remember what mod rock is Monrock Come on guys then bully me Holy back Let's get in his mod rock Are you

Oh let's get some fucking mod rock In my Last mask I'm fucking James With that said We'll be back after these messages Ha ha ha ha ha Dick the head shirts

Available now Check in a description What's up Yeezy What's good What's up bitches Let's holler it y'all With some at ease This is the part of the show

We head over to the JAR Media Reddit Which you can do And you can leave any question query Or concern or whatever you Freaking want if I'm being quite frank At the JAR Media Reddit At the JAR Media Reddit And we will talk about it

Yeah, we'll talk about it As long as you just go to the JAR Media Reddit That's where we answer questions It might still be a bit broken But we actually have some this time Yeah, but where do you go to give us some? A line JAR Media Reddit

JAR Media Reddit JAR Media Reddit, you heard it here first. You send a direct email to Alex at Alex Beltman at gmail.com. Don't do that. You'll destroy my inbox. User Joshua Larson left a post on the Reddit that I need to read.

Cool. Okay. Shoot us. The title is JAR gets me bullied. Sometimes I listen to the JAR cast on my way home from school because it helps alleviate the depression. I've gotten that day. Anyways, though, I was walking home, listening,

and you guys started talking about the shreddies, and I just started fucking dying. Well, someone from my class took a picture of me walking and laughing at literally nothing and sent it to everyone, and I look psychotic in it. So thanks, Jarl, you've ruined my life. Long-time fan, keep up the good work. Um, this is what modern society's done to us.

Yeah, it's fucked up. Like, like 100 years ago, you see a fucking crazy dude in the street. do you avoid him you take him out now you take a picture and then that laughing person that crazy person is just evil to the world agreed it's fucking bullshit fuck the police fuck the system fuck the system fuck the group collective fuck group think and fuck the establishment the group collective really well we ready for some Questions?

Yeah, fuck em. Fuck em. Uh, Julie Ungie says, question for James. Yes. How does it feel to murder someone? Pretty good. The same person, though, for real, actually asked, you've revealed your favourite YouTube channels before, but what are your favorite individual YouTube videos?

So not just a channel you like, videos that you really, like, something? specific videos that you like. Hmm. You see, this is actually quite good because I don't like YouTube videos very often. Which people should like the jarcast often, you know what I'm saying? What do you mean? No, I don't press the like button.

No, that's not the question. No, I know, but this is how I know if something really stood out to me. Oh, I see so in your liked videos, they're genuinely videos you like a lot. Yeah. Okay, let's check my YouTube likes. Be blown away. I would say the Plinket Style Wars reviews. I'll re-watch them quite often. See, that's quite boring, because that doesn't seem special. They're just good videos, dude. Nothing wrong with it.

Obviously, the thing I tend to go back to the most old spill.com reviews of various movies. Really? Like I Because I rewatched True Grit recently I was like Wait a minute Spill.com was around when that film came out I can listen to the review for it

Yay They do a review of Rocky No I don't think they're around One I've got Which is like It's not unique Anymore

But I think Credit Where Credit's due It's sodium chloride is a good video. Oh, that Jimmy Neutron... Yeah. Really weird video. I think it's really good.

I like how to pick up a cat like a pro by Helpful Vancouver Vet. Okay. Okay. Sounds like that's a really good one. No, it is genuinely really good. See. I'm not basic like you boys. Probably, I've got two favourites.

And that's Frankton Archer singing the girl for me Panema. great video and must be lucky by Fun Drive two great videos so they're what songs no one was like an 80s drifting video from Japan and the other one's Frankson Archer that's perfect uh hang on uh Dobby dancing the classic yeah that's good uh or that poop pre video you you guys are just memers and I've got actual taste fuck off yours is just like drifting videos in Japan. It doesn't represent what YouTube is

though. No, it represents why I like... Dobby dancing is just YouTube in a nutshell. You know? A bunch of them have been like deleted and stuff. That's why you don't do it, because they get deleted. Why don't do what? Watch YouTube.

Any other answers? Or should I... James, would you like to cookie? Go to another question. No, I don't want a cookie, James. I don't want a cookie because we're recording an effing podcast. How about that? Hold Them Deer by a GMC Fo Show.

That's a good video. Maybe you should just link them in the description. I'm not doing that. I'm not... Well, aren't you a little bitch? I'm not doing that. Oh, lazy. I'm sorry, I'm not doing that.

Oh, are you lazy? Yes. Well, make me do it then. I'll do it for you. You do it then, baby. Okay. Okay, fine. Cool.

Epic. I'll link it in the description. Average cinema goer says, question for all members how often do you feel lonely and what do you do to try and combat it um all the time it's impossible to not be you lonely yeah haven't felt lonely in fucking months well look at you mr big shot no i've you not eat fucking cookies while we record the cookies's gone i can see it's right there in the

dribble I found a way to deal with loneliness quite well watch porn does it begin with M does the solution begin with M talk to cam girls isn't this why

isn't this what all those popular female Twitch streamers is why they exist right yeah female um using the word female is sexist you know oh uh would you say males no because they

Yeah, that's what I was getting at. What's wrong? What's the big problem with that? Probably because it goes against the Twitch terms and conditions. Fun fact, the Twitch terms and conditions don't exist because they'll ban people for something in the terms and conditions and not do it for big people. So they're not a thing. That's what I'm saying, dog. If you've got power and you've got money, show your teeth, you don't matter. Big tiddies and tight clothing.

No, no, you'll get banned. If you're like a titty streamer below 100, like, you know, 20,000 subscribers, they'll ban you for titty streaming. What, for cleavage? Yeah. Or a t-shirt and then you get 100K, then. But then if you're above, with them titties out. If you're above the 20K mark, they don't care because you're making money.

But this isn't the question. Let's talk about booby streamers. No, because that's a way to combat loneliness. No, because I just... Give them cash. Give them all your money. They deserve it, right? Yeah, like, no, because that doesn't put you in a better place. Like, build a one-sided relationship with someone, you know?

Well, like, it's all you. And you, like, you really value it, but to them it means nothing. Like, as long as it means something to you, then it's valuable. You guys are giving a shit advice. That one that's always comes up all the time. Is it? Bella, Bell. Bella Delphine. Bella Delphine.

She just actually does news, though. What's what a Patreon is? It's just legit nudes. Exactly. I don't, I wonder why I know that. Okay, yeah. God. I'm not subscribed to Bella Delphine on Patreon.

Pretty sure that's not her name. That is. It's Bell Delphine, right? It's B-E-E-L-L-L-E. Bell Delphine. Right? Let's just stop talking about her. You, you guys, but went off the topic.

No, no, this is on topic. You're telling people to consume themselves in booby-streamers is not good advice. Okay, porn then. No, that's not good advice either. Hey, you don't look at me for advice. You don't come to me to advice. Yeah, my best advice is to not listen to advice from us. We're the loneliest guys on the planet.

Let's start a podcast. I've got over my loneliness because I started to just consume the things I like a lot. So then my mind doesn't think about being lonely. It's like, I'm enjoying things in the moment. not lonely, boom. There's probably deeper stuff to this, but that's just my basic level stuff. Just consume media and keep your head away from it.

Well, I'd say, like, talk to humans. Like, real humans, not titty streamers. Not people online, not people in Discord group chats or anything like that. Yeah, that's a way to sort of dig. Dig yourself a deeper hole. Yeah. Because then they'll just delete you one day. Yeah. And they just, it is

just like, like, being social on easy mode. so there is no it's I mean just do it in control the thing about Discord is those people might someday just not torture anymore and you're going to feel the same again you just feel shit

yeah you just have to have physical people you do it's a balance yeah don't be jumping between Discord servers every other day you're not doing yourself any favours okay well on the sort of similar lines

bat Muppet 2 said so recently Me and any other British boys have started college recently, and I find it hard to talk to people. Alex has said before that he regrets being so shy in the past, so my question to you, boys, is how do you combat shyness and speak to new people? No, honestly, I watched a TED talk on this, so I know it's true. Jokes, though, not just, you know, but for real do, eye contact. basic communication language no but that is the most important thing if you are talking to someone

and you're constantly like looking at your feet and looking away you don't give them a positive thing not only for them but for yourself like you don't know how they're reacting to the things you're saying if you're not looking at their face you know

the reason you're not looking is because you're afraid that they're not liking you and showing it in their face but if you look at them I mean you know and the like who it is they're not just going to be a dick and like be angry at you and yeah we think about it logically

like we tend to overanaly look at me in the eyes when you talk please we tend to overanalyze simple things like that yeah yeah like a lot of the time especially in situations like that if you are just going to uni or college like everyone's in the same boat so in a in a strange way it's almost like hitting the reset button and it's kind of easier than say you're like in year 9 or 10 and you've been in school and you sort of know all these people, you know of these people and you can't find a good way to start talking to them. As long as when you like go, when you first go to like uni

and you like apply yourself a little bit because you do need to, you know, put a bit of a fire under your ass and be like, right, I'm going to put myself in a position that might, make me uncomfortable at first, but as a result, there could be something good that comes of it. I don't know, I can't speak for you guys, but every time I have pushed myself out my comfort zone, so that's when the best things have happened for me in my life, usually. Well, it's when you grow. Like, you're, pain and game, you know? Pain and frickin' game, dude. You know what I'm saying? As someone who actually went to college, you know, nobody only went to

college I took myself away from you know you guys did yeah I went to college and I think with college you do specific subjects where the people who also go they're normally interested in those subjects for me it was most sport engineering so the people they're all car people I remember being there I barely talked to anyone for the first like week or two but there was this group I know who's always like you know just walk past or something I'd hear them talking and also pick up these little things where they would watch the same YouTube channel I do quite literally yeah and then And then I was like, I was constantly for like, the, like, for three days, just like, I want to go talk to them.

And it was an end of like a lesson. It was, you know, till the lunch. And I remember the guy standing there talking. And I quite literally just, I decided to be like, I'm just going to go do it. I'm not going to be just continue being like afraid of it. Yeah. So I just walked up and said, I just referenced that YouTube channel. Yeah.

And then he was like, oh, you watch him too? And I was like, yeah. And then I just started talking to this person about it. and then suddenly there was two other people as well who basically did the same thing when they saw me doing it and then in common ground and you can just talk about something and then we were this you know group of like seven from that day onwards in that the college and I and like one of them I'm still friends of now and I'm I'm friends of all his mates now so just by doing that I've like gained more friends because I've just talked to just one person about

that's a sick move a common ground thing and that's I was afraid because back at then you know I was like super shy. I was so scared of everything. And it's like I left everything I knew to go to college, you know, you know, travel out of my town. Well, yeah, I was exceptionally shy until 21, 22, I'd say. But not so bad that like I actually couldn't function. But like every, like I couldn't talk to new people really. I couldn't properly communicate, you know.

I don't really know what, like, you, everyone at a certain point, what I'd hope, just reaches, like, okay, I've had enough of this bullshit now, like, I mean, some people never become that, like, in their own shell, you know? Some people are just out with, like, their entire, like, you're either an extrovert or an introvert, and I've always leaned towards being introvert. Yeah, an intrextavert. I'm, like, super introverted. It's quite difficult times. I think we all are. I can't, being on people, so draining, but it's just like, you need to push yourself out to be able to just change and get meeting people. But I find for me, now, talking to new people is very easy.

What is hard is talking to people who you have previously known in some form. Whether it be like people who you sort of knew from school, or you know that kind of thing but like because in my mind I've this this idea that they have a conception based on me from the old me and like they're expecting something different it's like it makes no sense but that's the thing in my head so now I don't really have issues with it but and this the secret honesty is just ask questions like if you don't know what to say to people open questions as well open questions um find out well yeah it depends on where you are like if it's easy if you're in like college or school or something

you just say what subjects are you doing like start there um because because or like if it's a job like you're both doing the same job you can like start the conversation based on that point of reference and stuff like that you know what does piss me off though what is when you keep asking these questions and then you don't get any in return and that will happen. Oh yeah and you'll have to learn that they're either just, they've got their own shit they're dealing with

or they're just not interested. Some people don't want to talk to you, like that's just the way it goes. I mean I might ask a question about you but it doesn't mean I'm interested, you know? No, but there is it depends how polite you are, you know? I suppose.

Like if you're sardined in with someone, and you don't really want to be there it just makes it easier for you know both of you if you can just get along and communicate yeah yeah

just pass the time like it doesn't matter like what you're talking about often is just Guff like it's bullshit but that's fine you know this but I mean even then like you can you can build like a relationship

with someone from Guff yeah because within the Guff you learn things. And then if you pinpoint the things about the person, then you can if you want, kind of

delve in more. Yeah, man. You know, it's one thing I do now. Go out your comfort zone. Yeah. I also, I find it a lot of work where it's just like, I get shy of asking for things or trying to get more work. And I make my body act quicker than my

mind. So it's instead of just like, oh shit, she's saying. I literally just think that and then I'm ready walking to talk to the person because then I've literally put myself in this situation where I can't want away. So I'm like, my mind's going to look at you and then you have to communicate. Yeah, I do that. You can't walk away? If I'm going to, I don't, I'm just like, can I ask you something?

But like when you're young, like you have no clue what you're doing. So don't punish yourself of making, you know, being awkward now and again or making mistakes. And we've, every, everyone is awkward of all ages. Yeah. Yeah. And you build you when you start a new job They don't dwell on it

You know No, that's the thing You might dwell on it But the person probably is just like That's kind of weird or something And then they just move on Like they don't think about it They don't think about their own mistakes

Typically Yeah Just push yourself Also like Make a fry up You know Get a pie Just get a fucking pie and be like

Get a pie from Shane's please Like just Just give it a shot Yeah You know So I do You know Go to a shop

Buy some cupcaves I'd be like I've got some cupcakes Yeah Go buy like a cat poster Where he's like hanging on the tree branch And it's like hang in there

You know You just got to do it Just do it Just do it You just got to go there And buy some yeas You know You've been thinking about

Yeas for so long You know what Just go and buy him Get take a loan Now, buy some easies. I'm sorry this is just a message Jim is trying to tell himself to go buy yeasies. It is. I was staying to Alex and Tesco.

I'm buying some Uis. I thought you bought some. Yeah, I'm wearing them right now. Oh shit. We have a very long post on here, but if it's true, which I'm not sure if it is, this could be funny. This is from Deport underscore Ledweck. Jarmedia ruined my wedding? This is a wedding.

Having gone wrong story apparently. I'm going to bullshit already. This is my second time posting this story now, because of course the Reddit broke. Last week, blah, blah, blah. But I have an interesting anecdote. Basically, I've done goofed and probably made the biggest mistake yet. Which will now haunt me for the rest of my days. I mean, it's a funny story, but I'd like some genuine advice on where to go from here.

This is a bit of a long one, so buckle up. So after proposing to my girlfriend of four years last October, she made the mistake of leaving the entire wedding plan up to me. She insisted that I surprised her and reassured me that the theme can be anything I want Taking this quite literally, I thought it would be funny and memorable to organise a full-on jar media theme wedding I warned it Wait, first of all, where's our invitation? Yeah, where's our...

You can't have a jar media thing wedding about jars Yeah, and where's the open bar? Yeah, dude I warned her and the guests, I warned her and the guests that this would be an unconventional ceremony of course and they all seemed happy and excited so I didn't see this is anything to worry about last week we finally tied the knot

I think and old mama was I wrong I'll cut right to the chase while waiting for my bride to get prepared during the processional I thought I'd joke around with the guests I decorated my tie with DIY swept owls

and the rest of my suit was that iconic shade of baby blue extremely anxious I assured myself that everything was going to be alright and I cheerily announced to the crowd that I've already watched the whole wedding. Just to get in the spirit of things. It's probably worth noting that out of the 112 friends and family members that attended the ceremony,

only five, including myself and four bros, are watches of the yogs. So I was met with nothing more than some confused chuckles. I probably should have thought through that a bit better. Well, soon enough, my bride's father walked her down the aisle, and the band begins playing an... This is a lie, dude. An orchestral rendition of pussy diarrhea while cringe. There's no fucking way. There's absolutely no fucking way.

Wow, cringe. I was struggling to contain my laughter. That would. Yeah, the sort of cadence is right, isn't it? I was struggling to contain my laughter until I saw my girlfriend's face forcing a broken smile. There was great sadness in her eyes as she passed under a row of Dick the Head and argue the corgi-shaped balloons. Yeah, it's a lie. yeah you took it too far with the story dude yeah no if it had just been like one thing

yeah like if their first dance was pussyed every a while cringe or something yeah that would be i'm just kind of curious how far they've gone with this story i know like they've written this whole and we would have got an invitation had this been real yeah so yeah her father just looked confused instead uh we take payments by the way for going to wedding oh yeah you can pay us to It'll be great, it'd be epic. Do you know what I would probably get a hundred per cast member and you we don't come by ourselves Yeah, we come as a group. 300 pounds and you can have us at your wedding making this show epic

600 if you want reuben as well this goes deep man like I was just reading ahead a little bit How much more is that there's like a huge paragraph after this still Like, there's a part where they said, uh, right after she gave the least confident I do, known to man, the confused efficient declared us nibber and grinch. And said,

and said, you may now minge the bride. The reaction was painful. Most people gasped. Others awkwardly clapped, while some even groaned in disgust. After the ceremony where my wife didn't see, say a word to me and I felt rather embarrassed.

People calmed down and gathered for the banquet. Of course there was other food, but a cucumber nick was served to every guest as an addition. People didn't seem too bothered by them, although the drinks were labelled Alex's special juice, and everyone kept asking who Alex is. Meanwhile, a group of singers slash actors I selected and hired as jar impersonators sang Acapella versions of initial D songs. and Minecraft parodies to entertain us. These guys had me mesberized

that Alex and Jim impersonators actually looked pretty solid while the Ruben looks so similar to the real one it was uncanny. Not to mention all their voices sound amazing. James looked pretty dodgy though they got him rather wrong.

But whatever, right as the bride and groom's first dance was about to begin, the jar impersonators were about to leave. But I was disappointed to see them go so soon. I ran after them and struck up a friendly conversation with the four persuading them to stay a bit longer by chatting with them for a further half hour this was the closest I've ever felt to actually having a conversation with the job boys themselves and I felt quite heartwarming when I finished my chat with what felt like the jar boys things quickly turned sour again I returned to a pissed-off crowd amongst which I couldn't find my wife frantically I searched until I was informed by her angry mother that she'd left hearing that my wife had left our own wedding early without town telling me was deeply concerning. I sprinted out of the manor house to catch her speed walking home, and she was sobbing her eyes out.

I tried to comfort her, but she shoved me away, screaming at me to not touch her, and about how disgusted she is with me, and asking what the hell I thought I was doing. She basically told me I'd ruined what was meant to be the most special day of our life by theming around something childish, even though she literally told me to pick a theme. and overreacted a bunch of minor details over a bunch of minor details claiming that I didn't take this day seriously enough that I was too distracted by the singers and that I wasn't even looking at her and any of the photograves

just things like that I've never even seen her like this before and it genuinely hurt hearing the love of my life speak to me this way I'm absolutely ashamed of myself I've humiliated myself and my wife in front of everyone we know my friends and relatives think I'm some kind of freak

while my in-laws probably hate me even more now. I wish I could just undo this day but I can't and I feel really shitty overall even though I feel like she's blown things out of proportion a bit she hasn't she hasn't spoken to me all week

and her honeymoon to Madagascar has been called on originally I thought that this would be funny and charming but I don't know what to do with myself anymore and I feel like I've ruined what was once a healthy relationship and nobody will ever see me the same way again.

Anyway, enjoy this story and any serious advice is much appreciated. Also, many thanks for the laughs over the years. The end. No, that's shit. There's no way. There's no fucking way. Why does he take it so seriously, though?

If that was real, I would... It's really clever, though, because, like, it asks for advice and shit like that. Like, there's all these little... Like, it goes too far, but then there's another thing that's like, but why would you have that really specific random detail? Yeah.

That's what I mean, like the emotional details. If that's real. If it's true, post pictures to the Reddit. No, if it's real, the closing down chart, that's it. That's it. No, if it's real, I'll be so thrilled. No, I'll be fucking horrified. No, because...

No, but the fact that this person's done that is just like... No, this is what I've always wanted. I've always wanted to start a cult. No, but it's ruining someone's wedding. I didn't do that. No, we didn't do shit. I know we didn't, but we did it second time. This ain't even real.

This fucking didn't happen. I know, if it did. If it did happen, then we have gained one cult follower. Yeah. Because he doubled down that hard. He ain't backing down from that. There's respect there. That's right.

He's got to move to Rootcha now. He's got to stay on a farm with us. Come to old swidders. Yeah. Man, so yeah, follow up with that one. And if they don't, by next episode, it's BS, I'm afraid. Yeah. And you gave a second-hand embarrassment.

I didn't have any embarrassment from that one. I'm proud. In fact, picturing it made me get a semi, so. And that's episode 185. 184. Was it? Five, idiot. No, it's 185, you fucking idiot.

You just got fucking rinsed, you fucking fuck. So are we? Idiot. Way. you fucking prick fucking twat fucking lick face fucker

wanker get really aggressive to me on this podcast you deserve it With that being said though This episode was sponsored by Thatcher's Hayes

This episode Just sponsored by Shreddies And yeah hopefully Flashlight Please tweet at Shreddies Bye Um J-Media

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