JAR Media Posdact - oh my god

Episode Date: September 9, 2024

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Find us on Spotify and iTunes under: "Jar Media Posdact" Find the original episodes under: "The JARChive" Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/jar-media-store Twitter: https://twitter.com/FourFunnies Timecodes: 00:00 Intro 09:39 The Minecraft Movie Changed Everything 34:47 Mid Break 35:59 Neo of Lib 49:29 Question Segment: Facehugger that Goes Elsewhere 53:36 Using the 'Like' Feature 57:16 Apps for Rating Music/Games/Etc 1:00:52 Patron Segment

I'll take the cheese pizzi. I'll take a cheese pizzi, but only if you sort of take away the cheese. Just a normal pizzi. Hold back on the cheese, please. Hold back on the mato, please. On my pizzi? You don't have any vegan cheesy, do you? What? Oh look I'm Jim and look I'm gonna go after

Vegans Oh look I'm gonna go after vegans for all those Soys they eat And drink It depends on why you're vegan Um Just for the aesthetic

Um Then yeah Go for it Hmm Yeah Yeah What we talking about Vegans

Oh god don't get me start on vegans um you were vegan for like eight years I was never a bloody vegan should we go pears on it do you eat avocados

do you eat avocados look I might be a millennial do you eat avocados then you're killing more men than me on a day I'm sorry peers please forgive me average peers Morgan interview Um, yeah, you've got to make more pig squeals and, um, be a little bit louder than pretty much.

Yeah, also, and I'm, I'm letting you talk way too much. True, yeah. You have to get a few in there, I would say. But yeah. Do you think David Cameron did it? Reh! Yes. Like, no doubt. And that's the noise he made.

Yeah. Do you think he laughed? Do you think Boris laughed while why? watching him. Boris, he didn't just laugh. He was like playing with himself. Yeah, I was, I, I, I, that's the exact thing that came to my head as well. Like, you just know, like, these fucking weird creeps.

The Bullington Boys. Yeah. Hello, I'm Bullington Boy. I'm just a good little boy, don't you have a mind. Oh, just give me 10 years. I'll be running the country soon enough. Yeah. Give me just a bit, a few more pieces of pork for a bit.

they've all got to run through a certain amount of pork before they can fucking well put a pin in pork I want you to remember that put a pin in pork pin in port yeah but first good afternoon morning evening or night ladies and gentlemen of the jury this is the CSI podcast

and didda Was that like the whole intro song I don't know I've never watched CSI when we're on the late CSI Miami when they're flying on the Everglades. Oh yeah. You know, you and me, but it's just

bang-d-d-bang. Yeah, and then it gets straight back, yeah. Boat and then it ends. Yeah. But I guess I'm your host Alex, joined by Jim. Pin in pork. That pin is going to stay in the pork

until we're done with housekeeping and cleaning up the mess we normally do, which, uh, yeah. Yeah, can get us into something we need to talk about, bro. But before we get too deep, I need to shout out of that jar media, Patreon, to make the audio version of the show possible, they get those names, those patron names, those goofy, insane patron names, read out in the first or second week of each month.

Like this very episode here. Let me just double check the docket, make sure there's nothing else to forget. Yep, that raw MP3 ad free over on Patreon as well. and of course jafter hours the weekly we're up to like episode 10 or something

of these so for now they've been Patreon exclusive additions warmups cherries on top to your weekly

jarcast or jam in the middle jam in the middle whatever whatever sounds yumiest or best to you and speaking on that I

I'd noted down yeah this idea of housekeeping the idea of perhaps hypothetically putting it into J after hours in some form

that the response I was not anticipating I have no idea which direction this is going to go really I have some inclination

but I haven't been into because I was presenting it in quite a like I just wanted to like vibe check you know I just wanted to gauge like what what's saying that

would what response that would get and I guess I'll just read a couple things here Goldfire VI can get us going Regarding the housekeeping topic Housekeeping was one of the best changes To the show ever made And I'd sorely miss it

In the full episodes This is especially true for re-listens We're on long drives I love listening to old episodes And having the conversation pick back up When listening to most war in a row It's really nice. If housekeeping was to move to Patreon, I would most likely resubscribe for it, but I think it would impact my enjoyment of the podcast proper and make re-listens of the cast a lot less fun.

I'll just read a few of these. Like this one from Finn Kane. Oh shit, just drop in there. Buy a stick on my like. I hate the idea of not having housekeeping in the episode and paywalled. I was on the Patreon for a long time. And when I can financially justify it again, I definitely will subscribe. but I have but to have something like that has to be exclusive to the page

and be exclusive to the Patreon would be a bummer Charles O'Neill says putting housekeeping behind a paywalls a slippery slope to the total privatisation of the Yogs Comrade James would be furious

Johnny Stevens said housekeeping and job after hours would destroy the community aspect where it has has this conversational feeling let it be in the episode um yeah I'll read one more here

from uh it shat 7582 whilst at first I didn't like the housekeeping segment now I think it's a staple of the show and so important

to fuel the ongoing community and discussion aspect of the jar at the minute I'm not in a financial position to become a patron and I would honestly feel really hurt

if it was removed and locked behind that paywall I think you should keep it in so I know it probably won't sound like it but the whole paywall aspect was not like an intended

oh I think that will Look, we went public recently and we've got shareholders to placate. Do you have a fiduciary responsibility? Yeah. We're always talking about that. And since the previous leadership, there's a fiscal black hole and we need to nickel and dime wherever Christing hell we can. So get fucked.

I, um, yeah, I guess I didn't fully accept. explain the thought process of uh yeah i i wasn't sure if i wasn't sure if people because like when we first started doing it and i think to a degree james and i included but like it there was a lot of housekeeping no um there was a lot of negativity around it um but i like i got to agree with these people you know this uh yeah it it needs to stay and I'm not planning on doing anything about that I was I was more thinking in my head some way of not carving it out and like putting a paywall behind it but more just carving it out and put it on like a different day or something

that's more what I was thinking I don't really think it's necessary it's it it's like solving a problem that like doesn't even necessarily exist yeah I'm just thinking so then it would become like its own closed off conversation bit like if you want to be in the conversation then you go there yeah well you don't want to silo it like that no I don't yeah I think that um yeah that's taking like a part of what we do just the way yeah yeah so yeah I mean I'm glad I said it so now I've like gone through the thought process of like what that means and people saying all this is like just a confirmation of like if it ain't broke don't fix it you know yeah I also like the people like it because I've grown to really like it

yeah I like it too it makes it like unpredictable and I don't I guess it was that inherent thing of like does starting the show with a link to a previous one

her onboarding but then it's like onboarding has not been a concern if we cared about onboarding we'd probably have a completely different style

of uh presenting ourselves so yeah yeah I think it makes sense with the what we're doing but um speaking of making sense or not making sense we we can go back to that pin now I guess um that we put in because uh I feel like the the subject of Minecraft has been a recurring one on the cast I feel like any generation beneath Boomer Basically, yeah Has a Minecraft, like

Yeah, there's like the Minecraft song parodies There's all the jokes, the Minecraft worlds And there's Minecraft itself Minecraft itself, that helps I suppose that's where it all began But obviously, I mean, these talks of a Minecraft movie Have been fluttered about for years Jason Mamoa attached

and for the longest time I just assumed it was an animated movie because how else would you do it? But they found a way to do it. I've seen the trailer Warner Bros. As of us recording this two days ago

put up this trailer. I've seen it. Jim hasn't. We're going to watch it. It's a minute and 20. So you can get Jim's real reaction. This is good. I I'm Steve

This guy is such a tool bag What are you expecting? Not that Dude this Thoughts I think we've We've reached a new point But end times

New point of what this looks like the the worst looking thing the worst looking movie and the joke i keep seeing is like a uh 100 million like smosh video 100 million dollars smog yeah yeah that's how it looks man where do you even start with this shit awful idea from the word go like Minecraft movie bad already so many hurdles that they're already tripping up on making it live action tripping up again

this weird cast of characters that all just look like randomly picked why is Jason Mamoa dressed like Door the Explorer why is he not Steve why is Jack Black

Steve why Why is Steve just Jack Black in a blue t-shirt? Well, they're doing the like, uh, Jumanji bullshit, you know? It's like, sucked into the game world. Yeah, and Jack Black is in Jumanji. Yeah, he is. It really is like...

Fuck. The, like, creative process of, of something like this, like the Minecraft movie, right? it genuinely is it's not about the story at all it's about like they have i guess they have a spreadsheet up of like all the billion dollar things there'll be there'll be that they'll be like yeah the the mood board of Minecraft things yeah yeah but also yeah the stats of like billion dollar movies oh yeah the let's just go with the the the Jumanji formula this time you know sucked into the thing you got Kevin Hart

you got your Jack Black what can go wrong and then of course the literally everything is wrong with it the art direction right Minecraft is one of the most famous like iconography but they went with the

like Detective Pikachu let's just add so much detail up to this but you can't like detail the art style is that it's not detail that is the style so how do you make that detail

yeah it looks like those YouTube videos of like hyper realistic Minecraft mod and it just looks like shit yeah we'll just like misses the whole point of it the Beatles thing as well

using magical mystery tour why dude if this is the movies we're getting made by humans than just for bring on the AI shit we're genuinely this this is as bad as it can get yeah from a one minute 20 second trailer it can't get much worse than this from yeah like from one minute less than one minute that's including like text and shit they go you know they got they got they

got the uh the portal wrong the color wrong really yeah just stuff like that where it's like what yeah because like at least the mario movie is much of a cash grab like dick film i mean that looks i've not even seen it um no it is this as bad as it looks art style you know it it looks like maria you can only yeah you know that credit where credit is due Mario looks like Mario Luigi looks like the Ouija. A creeper doesn't look like a cosmic horror. Yeah. Because there's like a poster of it like zoomed in on a on a creeper.

And you can see all the like moss and the, you know, the black outline of its face. It's like a hole. So you can see. Yeah. It's like turn the creeper into something existential for me. You know? It's like what is in there now? Who's like?

I'm fine with. What the fuck is directing this? Because it was supposed to be Rob McKenny, you know. McElhenney. McElhenney. Yeah. McElhenney? I don't know.

Irish name. Mac. Mac. Yeah. He was attached at some point. Yeah, that's probably when it was like an idea. Right, yeah. So it's this guy Jared Hess.

Who... What? I guess he directed Napoleon Dynamite and Nacho Libre. What the fuck? Okay. So we're in good hands, I guess. Do you think movies like this are just passed around by directors and writers like hot potato? Yeah.

I don't want to be attached to this any longer. and like it just ends with someone who can't they can't be like no i'm i'm working on this other thing uh-huh well it's like the famously um on borderlands i'm sorry if you can hear the rain being picked up we just yeah we just lo-fi um beats chill slash relaxed do it but uh on this borderlands movie that just came out that the writer of like the last of us show and uh shenobble yeah he was attached but he's like changed his name There's a few of those during... I assume that's being picked up.

It's quite loud. Yeah? I think I should close it? I don't know. Do you think? I don't know. I mean, it's pretty chill. I don't know. I'm more just scared of water coming in now. Wow, now it's kind of a vibe in here with the Minecraft movie.

Minecraft movie. So yeah, I'd say that's fair, a Minecraft movie vibe. Yeah, Jack Black seems to be taken... People are turning on him now. Even though they were loving him in the Mario movie, so it's like... Mario Movie 2 comes out and then you're loving... He's in loads of these video game movies. Yeah, he is.

He was in borderlands. Oh yeah, it was. He was fucking... He's in all of them. Yeah, he's in every single one. I think, um, I think most people call him cocksuck. Cock suck. I fucking hate Board Lions.

Why'd they make that movie? Yeah, there's been one good game. And it was cringy when it came out. Like, I kind of love that it exists. It's so embarrassing. Just like the Minecraft movie. It's like so embarrassing. Do you think it was?

hurt their careers at all? No. I think this film make a billion bucks. I don't know, man. I think it might. I don't know, because like the Mario movie, I could see how that would appeal to like brain rotted, you know?

Yeah. Like TikTok using Yeah. This is what, like, Detective Pikachu didn't look that much, like better than this to me. And that made loads of money. loves it um that really yes what do you mean really people fucking love that film

like to this day ryan Reynolds is in it and Pokemon are in it yeah people love that film do we see that at the cinema I did I think I did I fucking hate that film this is this is this this trend I hate I hate this trend so much Which trend? The video game trend. Oh, the onslaught? Did you even see Uncharted? No.

Bro, they're so bad. It looks so fucking dick. And it's like, it's, it's not the video game movies now are decent. Oh. They still suck just as bad as fucking Doom with the rocking. From way back when. They're that same level, but now people are, are just like, oh wait, it's fucking

creeper. Well, now, yeah, it's like people like Ready Player 1. I mean, that says it all. People love Ready Player 1, you know? Was that what opened the door to it all?

Oh, it's the fucking Halo 5 Spartans. though I think it might actually be I think what opened the floodgates was Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland I think that started all of this but that's not a game like the video game I'm talking more like the look

you know like just the worst thing you've ever seen fuck yeah that that shit looks just like this yeah just the fakesest like human beings popping out of this Yeah, yeah, yeah. 3D rendered shit stain. It just, like, sucks. There's nothing cool about, like, the environment or the atmosphere.

Yeah. So we got that. But the video game thing, what started the video game thing? Like, them actually doing it? Sonic. Was it really? Because the Sonic movie came out and, like, people liked it, and it made a little money. Yeah.

Wow Which yeah I guess then there's the confidence with your marios and What other big game movies have there been recently Arcane was quite a big success Uncharted was a big success TV shows and stuff Fallout and The Last of Us

Fallout was a big one And Last of Us Lots of Sony stuff A Grand Turismo Oh yeah yeah District 9 guy making a grand tourism movie Really random That was him?

Yes. Nice. With Hellboy in it? Yeah. There's a new Hellboy coming out. What? Yeah. It looks like a fan film.

It's like... The one that came out a few years ago, you looked like a fan film. Yeah, it did. It looks like... More like a fan film than this one. Than the previous one. Wow. This new one, I mean.

Nice. It's called like, Hellboy and the scary slam. Wonder Man in the woods. Cool. Yeah. So a Minecraft movie, that's a day one confirmed for me. I'm going to be lolling for each time an animal screams or burps or does something random. Hmm.

You know? I mean, it looks like there's going to be plenty of. The way angry birds like the pigs. Yeah, angry birds. is another one oh yeah the angry birds movies yeah maybe they were the ones that led the charge yeah they made they made a couple of those but yeah they kind of did that and that as well they like make the angry birds all like what's the anatomy of an angry bird yeah you know that's the conversation there what's the

anatomy of a Minecraft llama and they're building these like like the muscles and the sinew of a fucking Minecraft llama in order to get like the tongue muscles like right when it screams and like the teeth rotting just at the right 30 underpaid animators were sleepless nights to create the fucking llama's asshole to do funny and the other the next layer of meme did you see the Nick Fuentes shit what to do with this to do with this no he just screenshots of like very you can't make this he just take he took like a screenshot of the black woman i just tweeted it like really oh my fucking god because i i saw a clip from this other guy who might have been british i can't remember but in the

Mario movie trailer he was like look what they've done to Peach because she's not wearing her dress you see all of this all of this pure fucking just shit and you're like one black person

he's like that's who fucking cares about this trailer was looking pretty good until that yeah I was so excited to get into this and then they are to go on put one minority in it fuck

dude that's insane if if anyone like agrees with with those people on those talking points on these shit fucking films then you're a racist scumbag fuck like just see the shit for what it is see the fucking crap film

you know you know look um the tweet in question yeah it's just are you fucking kidding me with that frame um he knows what he's doing man yeah dude so yeah Minecraft movie I

so you think it's gonna bomb I think it's gonna make so much money um I do now yeah now that you've um the detective Pikachu thing I did have Ryan Reynolds as well which this doesn't but it does have Jason Mamoa and Jack Black and Minecraft for general audiences

how much do you think llama at the end going makes like just that I think that is what confirmed the billion in my mind is that that scene at the end

that using that in a trailer yeah what percentage of the revenue from the film do you think is owed to that llama I feel like the the thought process of putting that llama for like half of this trailer it's probably like a microcosm of how they

made the whole movie you know where it's like just analyzing like oh llamas are like tracking and get good engagement like make sure half the trailer's just like a llama like chewing um and just you know spread that out to its logical extreme you know oh jason moa we know he's bankable you know everyone loved him in justice league and akraman too um Jack Black, everyone adored him in borderlands And Gulliver's travels Get him in there I don't mean to be a dick to Jack Black

But has he only ever been in one good movie Fuck, I've got from Bandha Okay, no, three good movies What was the one you were counting before that School of Rock? I meant like Jack Black as a human Right not voice acting you mean yeah um he's got a couple good ones in there i'd say the marion movie he's not a human in the marion movie is he well i always thought bowser was human

like a mutant they'll explain it in this movie or whatever yeah in the law they could do that yeah do it what's the what's the mid-credits thing are gonna be it's gonna do something it's it's it's Microsoft right yeah this is Microsoft's foray and it'll be like um it'll tie into the fallout show they'll look through a portal and they'll be the nukes dropping we can't go home anymore you know what was it this multiverse bullshit there was one that I saw like uh discussing a film or whatever like posted an update of the new Jurassic world bullshit they hate and it was like the film's expected to be a multiverse story

and it's just like what the fuck you're talking about what isn't now they turn fucking basketball loony tunes movie into a multiverse film with fucking like mad max in it and shit yeah Yeah, and I'm looking forward to seeing Deadpool Wolverine Because that's obviously that to the extreme Yeah I need to watch it Yeah, yeah

It's nice to get like a It's like putting your fingers on the The beat of culture You know It's more like You know, like that Johnny Cash the Johnny Cash

the Johnny Cash song that he covered from that guy you like 9 inch nails. Hurt? Yeah hurt. That's what watching Deadpool is to me. I hurt myself today to see if you still feel.

But nothing to do with the cover aspect. No, I just couldn't remember the song. Oh, right. Okay. Um, my point is, like, it's, for me, it's safe to watch a Deadpool movie, because I know I'm going to feel something. You know? It's like, if I watch the Minecraft movie, I'm going to be empty. No, I'm going to be full. Oh, I hope there's a Deadpool cameo. Oh, fuck nuggets. Is that a creeper? Is that a creeper? Is that a creeper? Huh.

Yeah, apparently people are turning on Ryan Reynolds as well. Finally. Fucking out. T.J. Miller said he was a cunt. So everyone's like, yeah, T.J. Miller. I'm just like getting a wave of all these, like, cursed 2012 YouTube Minecraft memories. Like, do you remember what some of the, like, parody animations and stuff are like? you know that meme of the guy like looking at the screen just eating crips and it's

like me as a nine year old watching a creeper get assaulted yeah everyone who watched youtube around that year will have that particular one in their fucking yeah because it's fucking actually traumatic like why did that person make like they effort into that. That was probably like a multi-person team. Not YouTube back then, bro. That was one dude in his basement. Well, he put way too much time

into that shit. It was so fucking frightening. But like there are they're a multi-millionaires who are millionaires because of the parody songs they made using Minecraft lyrics. Captain.

Captain! Imagine like chilling in your in your pool in your mansion because of Coldplay Minecraft parody. Yeah, what a fuck it. He probably made more money from that Minecraft

song. I think Coldplay did. More cultural significance. Yeah. He didn't even change the lyrics for that one, I don't think. He just had like a Minecraft king walking around and didn't move us like that

that's enough I don't know I might be wrong yeah because he already says the words like sword and shield yeah

he's like he didn't have to change anything maybe maybe Colplay wanted him to do it it was their vision the whole time

I don't know a multi-millionaire nice fair play oh yeah fair play he struck while the iron was

I'll say unlike this Minecraft movie that's the opposite of striking when the iron's hot yeah yeah the iron's been left in ice for 300,000 years oh man it's cool though we're in the end times and you're not even yeah we are and they're not even gonna use like the cool Minecraft music are they It's gonna be like Beatles the whole time Ed Shearing And do a leaper Yeah, a bit of Billy in there Tame Impala can take it away

I'm glad you enjoyed that Anything else you got to say on a Wait is it called a Minecraft movie That's weird. A Minecraft movie. It's not called the Minecraft movie. It's a Minecraft movie. Do you know how they could make this fire?

How? Twist ending. Right. The camera like pans out. And they're like on a green screen. Yeah. You see the green screen. And they're doing like cringy, you know, I of the spider type.

Mm. You know? Yeah. And then it just plays Eye of the Spider Right? I think that's who the main character should be Yeah It's the Eye of the Spider kid

Yeah, yeah, yeah Because I mean that That is a part of Minecraft You know, Eye the Spider More the story than this film probably Hmm Oye of the Spider After these messages

Yeah Life can be a dick sometimes so get your dick from out your hand and don't be a dick wear a dick the head t-shirts available now check the description below how would you direct your Minecraft movie um would you do a whole sucked into the game thing or would it just be like steve's just always been there and i'd have the hair of Brian be in it straight up that yeah that could be fire yeah like steve's life is get is being ruined because the herobrine is pretending to be him and ruining his life yeah yeah and then the villagers go ohy get him

you know it can be like a whole um statement on neoliberalism you're really into that at the moment aren't we huh you're really into that aren't we i mean i live in a neoliberal way what can I say I mean hey if we live in that kind of way can you define it for me like say hey define what

neoliberalism it's like you know what it means to be liberal not really there we are liberal it's like freedom but newer

freedom but newer freedom but newer no no I reject your why liberal liberation

to be liberated liberty the statue of liberties yeah what does it what does liberty mean freedoms freedoms freedoms and how does freedom them come about in within a system hmm maybe liberty

he just went back to the beginning immediately after yeah I gotta say I was distracted by something money money capital does that make you a Neo or a lib what what what liberalism manifest within a system is capitalism right so newer liberalism developed liberalism means more freedom of freedom more right so less control of liberalism liberalism system capitalism neoliberalism so why not just sell me more of it sell me more freedom if it's so simple sell me more freedom well my whole point is that freedom shouldn't exist because I don't believe in it to begin with oh god right no play frost punk

you'll understand press play on frost play what are you talking about Can I go to the questions or is snoring billy going to distract me to such a degree? Can you call this episode snoring billy? Snoring billy? Oh my god. Brother, I'm the yardle of white rock. Um, um,

did I introduce this segment or? Welcome to the section. I just want to watch the Minecraft movie trailer a few more times. Can we do that? A Minecraft movie, sorry. I'll fucking drop kick a hole in your wall before. Fine, I'll put on the board lands movie instead in full. Yeah.

Maybe that's what we should have going, just on the projector, just have a full movie playing. Really distractingly. Full blast as well. Have like Schindler's list. like 12 years of slay yeah and try and be as funny as possible

like Avatar 2 you took it to the fun no I'm like yeah like a challenge you know where it's like I feel like that really was what makes the greats you know can you be funny while you're being faced with Shinders list

I struggle in a plain white room let alone exactly yeah that's what carves the greats they don't say is that what Jimmy Carr did before yeah they don't say it was avatar that gives enough pressure to create diamond do they do there I don't know maybe it makes enough pressure to make unobtainium tusha this tainium is so unobtainable

kind of love unobtainium apparently it's a real term it is it's a scientific term um this unobtainium goes for so much money

yeah it's just it is goofy though it's goofy in that they discovered this thing surely they would have given it a name epic amium yeah

lots of power in this Yeah. Do I have to close it again? Just opened it. I'm still standing... Something like everyone. Um, did, yeah, did I mention the... Did I introduce this segment or that I just kind of keep spinning the wheels kind of thing?

You know? The revs were too high. The hamster's not even in the wheel anymore. He's like outside the wheel running on top of the wheel. on top of the wheel it's so unhinged you know but it's still generating power because he's on top of the wheel still spinning the wheel but it's just way danger yeah you could get mulched up it's danger level high they do get mulched up if you just watch videos of hamsters like they often trip and they just go and they like it though

they like it that way and they'd have it no other way they're like getting spun out yeah I, um, I heard on a YouTube short, so there could be no credibility to what I'm about to say whatsoever. But apparently, if, if, if you just put, like, hamster wheels out in the wild, they would just go into them. Yeah, they still do it. Really? Yeah, like, they find them and they're just like, yeah, this fucking rocks. And not just hamsters, like rats and shit.

They just love running on the spot. Yeah, I mean. to them. Yeah. Hmm. I mean, who discovered that they just love it? Yeah, how do you even think of that? Like, what, what even equates to, like, a hamster wheel in the wild that, like, can give them that experience?

There's no wheels. So how do they know? Who figured out they like it then? What other weird, like, activities that animals like that we just don't know because we don't have a really specific object? Obviously, like orangutan's love driving golf car. Who would have thought that? Yeah. Like, what, like, crazy shit can, like, birds just do or love doing that we just haven't unlocked that they...

Or, like, fish. Mm. You know? What if there's an equivalent thing? Like, everything's got to... You know? We didn't know humans would just be obsessed with, like... Just putting finger on screen and pushing it up.

yeah to see like 60 seconds of another something to see a mongoose destroying a python that's what mine is right now yeah pray they're next level mongeese yeah I don't even know a mongoose crazy tangent but I feel like I'll just show you it how does it not die Mungai. Mungai evolved to be resistant to venom. They have these really thick hides. Aren't pythons like the most dangerous snake? Wow.

So they evolved to kill snakes, basically. Nature's fucking dumb. It's just like, it's so inventive, but also so just like crazy. Snakes exist. And as if that's not crazy enough on its own, there's also another just creature that's from a different family entirely. Yeah, like a rat dog specifically designed to not be killed and to be capable of killing snakes. And that's like just that one thing's ability. Yeah.

All other mammals would be screwed. Yes. Yeah. What a crazy, crazy world. So, um, I've invested in a few among guy opportunities. Keep us safe, yeah, once the snake invasion finally kicks off over here. Speaking of scary creatures, you sent me a dick move, by the way. I can dick move.

You sent me this article to like, oh, by the way, these spiders that have been extinct forever, that are the sides of rats have been bred back into existence in the UK. Yeah, I don't know why I saw that by the, thought oh jim should probably be warned about this but then i um i was watching youtube shorts and it popped up where this guy was like he he's he just talks about like why it's shit to be in the UK basically and he was like he didn't need to tell us fuck yeah yeah and he was like oh by the way these giant spiders are back in the UK and i was like oh so that's definitely real then what is that is his channel it's like new update on uh

things that suck about the UK basically he does it in like a funnier way than I just said it but I know it's pretty funny pretty much yeah that's crazy but yeah if I ever see one of those spiders in any

home like flat whatever the fuck I'm living in whenever in my life in this country I'm leaving going where bro we have it good here as far as bugs Not when that turns up But we have stripped the ecosystem

So bare in the UK There's nothing that can survive We're safe here We're safe Do you know where's safer In terms of bugs? Where Cold

It's cold here bro No colder I'm talking like Iceland I'm talking You probably be good for bugs there Alaska or Canada Or Somewhere just freezing

Fucking Arctic I'll go be an Arctic scientist find inner earth stop Kong from killing Zilla whatever the fuck these movies are about that is the only reason anyone spends any time in like Iceland the places that are yeah they're just like come on let's fucking do it we're gonna find that in earth soon that's the only reason anyone does anything is like just one step closer to inner earth yeah they try getting through the crust they couldn't fucking do it.

I just want someone who someone crazy enough but with a their sights set on the right ideas you know to become like president or whatever you know

I'm the inner earth president like I'm a sacrificial lamb I just want to get in so then I can reveal the truth about inner earth like that's my whole platform type thing defund everything apart from inner earth channel it all into inner earth all of the u.s military budget is now going into inner earth will be there in a week less i don't know man inner earth's pretty deep

you know russia just kept digging they're still digging when they went to to the moon or whatever the the space race they were like well that's done let's do the fucking digging race they said they both started digging we're gonna just get the deepest into the earth we're gonna fucking do it raw I heard the US were digging a really deep hole yeah but then they gave up

they were digging a deep fucking hole but Russia were like no fuck you we're gonna keep going I bet like 300,000 people died trying to get to them around Russia were they trying to connect the hole yeah

yeah it gets a bit silly at some point doesn't it Or it's like, at least, you know, getting to the moon, that's, like, quite an achievement. Yeah. Kind of bullshit that America, like, at least in our eyes, gets, like, all the credit for space stuff because of that. Because Russia did everything else. Like, they were the first to send, like, anything to space. Yeah, yeah.

They were the first to send, like, a dude to space. There were some Nazi scientists that helped, didn't they? In the American one, right? Yeah. In NASA. Yeah. I don't know how we got there, but normally this is the part of we answer questions from the Jal Media suggestion thread over on the subreddit. You can do a couple here if we round out this show.

Let's do this one from Lil Bingle underscore EXE. If a face hugger leapt up and was eating your ass instead, would it be called an ass chugger? Madder Than Eggs replied to that saying Comments of this sort are art I won't disagree I like the idea of a face hugger But instead it eats your ass Quite an ingenious way to flip that trope on its head

I wish the new alien did do that Yeah Yeah, I mean that would be a fresh spin But I mean the result would be the same Surely No, like it would I guess If it lays the egg in your ass

You poop it out Bit less scary Yeah It lays out of your shit It gives you way more of a chance Yeah, sure you So I'll take that one Yeah I guess you could call them my ass chuggers

Go for it Like, was something you could replace the alien's blood with that would make it, like, actually easier to get on? The alien's blood. Yeah, you know, that's, like, part of what makes it such a danger is the acid blood. Yeah. Um, there'd be, like, a real incentive if it was, like, blue gatorade. Yeah. You could hydrate.

Yeah. Like, really quickly. Yeah, it's a crack on. It makes some. Yeah, it makes them more like a bug. Like a helpful, juicy bug thing. Yeah, like a power-up. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm thinking soda blood. Yeah, that makes it a bit less scary. Pepsi. Or like that nice hit that foam. Some kind of foam, blood. Oh, like the goo from inside those sweets. Like the round trees randoms, the ones that go in them. Just like sugar.

Mm. A sugary sweetness sort of dribbles out. Yeah. Yeah. Because I've always thought there's bugs from the Lion King just look fucking delicious. Um, would it be called an ass chugger though? Face hugger ass chugger. Yeah. Does it have to rhyme?

I mean, like, I guess. Maybe if it was a different type of breed of them that, like, chose to do that, then you could name them a different thing. I guess, yeah, they'd have to Like their tail wraps around your neck Yeah So I don't know how It would need like

Four tails To like bind you in like a starfish So that you can't like get it off Yeah It would be like Yeah so it's a lot less scary I don't know The image of somebody, like, with this thing stuck on their asshole that's like eating their ass.

It's eating my ass. Oh my God. Yeah. You have a... What's his name? Something hurt. John? Yeah.

John Hurt getting his ass in by him. An ass chubby. My ass, John hurts. I mean, isn't that a joke in The Bull Wolverine? What I just said? I don't know. I don't know. Any one of these reference movies, I feel like if you just say, oh, that was that reference to that movie that had loads of references in, there's like a good chance it's going to be in there.

Let's do this one from, uh, it was actually. film the jar media group chat the patron group chat which is a patreon perk don't expect to see the recipe said on last week's episode when talking about the elephant graveyard videos jim said they're so good i actually liked them which surprised me is it rare for you guys to leave a like on youtube videos do you reserve it only for the best videos personally i keep a good stuff playlist for that and press like on pretty much everything wow um I guess everyone uses it differently, huh? I definitely like more now.

It's changed within me. I like... I like things that I like now, whereas I never used to. I would just, I don't know, make a mental note and... Yeah, I never really understood the point of it. Yeah, well, it helps the channel. Yeah.

um but i guess in terms of like immediate reward to me you know oh yeah there's not really any to you it's more altruistic kind of yeah yeah um but i didn't think that deeply about it like it it wasn't like click like because that's what you do and i always kind of thought like well how how can me liking it possibly help you know it's just like a statistic I mean I wasn't aware that the back end

yeah yeah um and then once you're in the habit of just like you go on a video you watch the video you go on the next video you watch that video yeah yeah whereas now if a video if I'm like wow yeah

at any point it would be like okay you've earned it yeah that's the way I do it whereas I have a lot of passive YouTube interaction where I'm not like watching it and more like listening to it like doing other things

whereas yeah if I'm watching something and there's a single moment where I think yeah this is a good ass video and then yeah I'll leave a like yeah I feel like it should be used like that as well

to me like for both ends because the creator needs to know what is good if all of their viewers liked everything they did they wouldn't know right what's preferred you know the the I guess the like to dislike thing although it seems as though it can drive people insane it can be a pretty useful thing for like okay people like this people don't want to see something this

Yeah, I miss the old just being able to see dislikes. Yeah. Because, yeah, we mentioned the Minecraft movie that trailer is being disliked bombed. Yeah, it's happening, I don't know, it seems like more and more to these big product movies and stuff. They're like just completely are embarrassing. Good. Yeah, it's a shame it's hidden because it only really protects the big corporations. I think that's really the only reason they did it, to be honest.

Let's do one more here. Let's have I like movies 77 take us away here. Can we ever get a rate to your music or music board account for those juicy music tastes of yours? Maybe an update on the backlogged if you ever play more. It's kind of a recurring thing. It's like people asking for... because there's letterboxed and there's this and there's that and now there's backlogged and now there's a music one and the debub um yeah i'd actually i'd made a backlogged and started putting my games on it or whatever oh i didn't realize that was a thing that's uh but it doesn't have an app oh never mind well i might do but it i did it on desktop um yeah letterboxed is the best one out of all of these as far as like ui and an app and stuff that works um um I don't really have interest doing it with music.

Yeah. I feel like I consume too much. Maybe, yeah. Like, it, it'll be a bit of a hassle. Yeah, whereas, like, it, I don't know, there's something about the process. So if you watch, like, a two-hour movie, you press one button afterwards, the end. Whereas, yeah. Yeah.

I might listen to five songs an hour. My, my capability to explain why I like or dislike a game or movie is much more. Just have a more limited vocabulary. Understandable. Yeah, but also, like, you know, a few episodes ago, I had that whole thing about, like, like, kind of at you. about like you can't I don't understand how you can say something is good but not like it yeah whereas I kind of can do that with music you know so you can so like I can I can

hear that like I can hear the quality of the music but I don't like it I don't want to listen to it yeah you know yeah I hear that because I agree with that as well not that like there are genres I avoid or well intentionally yeah yeah and it's not even a genre thing it's just like whereas I don't really have that with like movies for example where it's like

there's not entire genres I tend to write off yeah I don't know I'm happy just you know leaving it movies that's cool for me yeah I mean, what was the name of the music one? Um, tidal.

Title! Rate to your music or music board. If it had, like, an app as good as letterbox, maybe. I don't think it has to be as good as letterbox, per se. Well, I just mean functionality, like, when an app's, like, sucks and slow, and the search function doesn't work very well and this kind of stuff. I'm just not going to use it.

The search function on letterbox pisses. It's not very good. on letterbox yeah it's really annoying um that is true yeah yeah maybe i will maybe i won't oh maybe this is the end yeah okay let me know when you're red eye i only fly red eye what's red eye that's what they call the Like late flights Oh because your eyes get red Wow, isn't that?

Wow This is quite a satisfying way of lighting it Mmm Hmm Let's get out So that gives it a nice even burn. Yeah, mine's not even. Try evening it out with the candle.

This is how they did it back in there. In the real days. See, look at that. Why was that happening with the big flame? You tell me your science, bro I'm dumb, bro I'm not science No more science than me

I suppose Whoa Do you see the spectrum Yeah, creeper green Yeah, that was a beam of creeper green Wow A beam of creeper green It was a beam of creeper green

On that note, welcome to the section of the Paul Blart Where we go over to Patreon To greet our lovely patrons And thank them for a lovely We go over to Paul's Blart To Paul's Blart To Paul's Blart Shall I just crack on, shall I?

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I like when they get creative, you know. Mm. Get a bit psycho out of the box. When it gets a little bit frightening for the... A little bit freaky. For the reading. Did you do Barbour Bell? I didn't do the real one.

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Thank you dearly. Thanks everybody. Dearly. Thank you, ex dearly. I... I don't know.