JAR Media Posdact - Pick & Mix Goblin Mode (WARNING WTF) - JARCast Episode 304

Episode Date: December 12, 2022

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Find the original episodes under: "The JARChive" Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/jar-media-store Twitter: https://twitter.com/FourFunnies Timecodes: 00:00 Intro 06:11 Housekeeping 29:45 Goblin Mode is Confirmed Real By The Government 39:54 The LA Beast 46:09 Mid Break 48:15 How Many Sides Does a Banana Have? 50:36 JAR as a Lego Game 54:49 Alex's Vocal 'Meme Tinge' Is Gone 55:58 Have Alex and Jamie ever had a huge falling out? 59:06 Which Member of the Intellectual Dark Web are we? 1:03:01 Alex's Curl 1:08:49 A JARLings Swamp Story 1:17:42 Patron Segment

I need us to go around each giving a sound effect for um for like when we say naughty words that need to be edited out you know i always I don't just want to use a swear bleep Um, fascinating. Cool of Duty Black Ops. Mason. What are the numbers? Billy.

Bing! Ah! Ah! Your mom James' dad I don't know why you'd need to cover up swears anyway because we are very well-educated and sensible young men who never swear Your mom

Did I already say Bing Bing Bing? Bing Bing Bing! Bing! Bing! The thing I love about that is your mouth doesn't move in time with what you say. That's what makes it. James, do you're going to. James, do your best SpongeBob laugh.

Alex, you're gay. For SpongeBob? Yeah. Or Patrick. Oh, that was good. If this doesn't prove it all neurodivergent, I don't know what we'll. Yeah, that'd be a good one. Nora divergent.

I wish I'd have confidence because... I wish I'd have confidence because I'd do what you do. What? What? That's like the most backhanded insult I've ever received. No, like, when we play the balls to behave the way you do. No, when we play Cod, you have, like, the confidence to just do things down the mic that I would never do. Like?

Like, what I was just doing. Yeah. The people get really annoyed. People get so angry. People were, like, we'll lose a match. And then people will be like, ah, easy, bro. And I'll be like, ah. And they'll be like, stop it, stop it.

It really freaks people out. Really, you've done that multiple times. Yeah, that's my current go-toe. It's at least like three matches of God that it ends in that. I don't care about playing it, but that is where I feel like I could have enjoyed it. And it will be like one person talking, like one asshole. And then I'll do that shit. And then suddenly everyone comes out of the woodwork and starts having like an argument.

Really? Just because if you're doing that. Yeah. No, it's a great way to instigate, like, conversation and intellectual debate. Every good debate starts with that. Yeah. I mean, it's pretty much what Jordan Peterson does. Well, I guess, good afternoon, morning, evening, or night, ladies and gents.

I'm welcome to episode 304 of the Jogast. My host Alex, joined by James and Iangangu, y, y'ang. No. Oh, sorry, uh, bubsy and I, y, y, y, y, y, y, y. Uh, are you bubsy or buzzy 3D? James is buzzy G6. Like a buzzy. Like a buzzy.

Now I'm feeling so fly like a bubzzy. So, welcome to this show. You're joined by me, the rest of the gang. and today we're going to have some interesting discussions and we need to finally admit some long doings on the end of JAR Media but first we can shout at the JAR Media Patreon makes the audio versions possible

the JARCive RSS feed is up it's out there it's on Apple podcast now it's now on Apple which is good on everything I think it's all done and achieved I saw on one of the tweets there was a reply like saying

what about like putting all the old thumbnails on each episode as well. I don't know. I draw that. I can't. I can't. That's a lot of thumbnails. That's how many thumbnails? Like 130 odd.

Yeah. How? We'll get back to you. What? What are you going to do it? Yeah. What am I doing over Christmas? Nothing.

A Christmas gift to the jarlings is I will sort the thumbnails out. personally i'm quite fond of that picture of uh sandy that i used but uh you know bygones be bygones let bygones be bygones yeah or we make every picture the uh the infamous wino chasing the naked man picture which apparently was used on the bbc on the bbc yeah in like 2004 2005 like there's a funny like broadcast is down image like we'll be right back oh really yeah so it wasn't a news story about a man being chased by a hippo or whatever well maybe that's where it originated but for now no for now we must do some cleaning there's a house that needs to be kept um this this is a quick vacuum this time so doing like a quick little wash up a quick vacuum

And why have you decided this one? I particularly have a juicy one this episode. Because we spent like five hours doing housekeeping last week, and I'm through with it. What do you mean? We already went through this hump where we were like, okay, we'll put it out there. We'll put a vote out there, see what people think of housekeeping. Yeah, but people love it. You always need to know when there's like any sort of votes or any general consensus.

James is going to place himself on the opposite side. That's true. That's not really true, though. It's very true. When do I ever actually, like, outside of JAR, have the counterpoint to both of you? When you were talking about dogs wearing clothes? Mm.

Okay. Do you actually think dogs are cuter? When you were talking about hot fuzz? No, no. And why can't we include JAR? Because that's the one where the audience actually knows and has lots of others. Okay, so my argument here is that when people go out of their way to, like, dress up dogs and make them do cute things,

That inherently isn't cute because it's not them doing it. It's you putting cuteness on them. And I don't believe that's cute. I think dogs are they're cutest when they just are just doing their dumb little things. But sometimes you put clothes on a dog and it's like initially funny. But then it's how they behave with clothes on that makes it cute. Yeah, like Paisley is the M&M. That's a good one.

Yeah, Eminem pays. Awesome. Funny. That one I hugely disagree with. I don't like Eminem pays. I think it's a little bit, like, messed up. And why are you putting her in, like, a little body suit? It's like Deadpool pairs. Yeah, but why?

Why? She doesn't need to wear a... Yeah, because she... She originally wore it because she got the snip and it, like, it's like a nappy. Yeah, when she got the snip, she's not getting the snip now. She doesn't need to wear it now. So why you... That's why it was, I thought...

I found it, because I didn't realize I still had it. And I was like, oh, I wonder if it's still... fits her and put it on her and it was really funny. See, I would just be like, oh, that was funny back then, and then I wouldn't put it on me again. Not true. I, okay, one of the reasons why I might say this is I own a collies, and actually collies ain't

I ain't going to deal with any of that. You know, they're working dogs, so I'm not going to dress Gaius up. Pais is working. She's a retriever. She retrieves? She doesn't, does she? So I'm, I'm torn now, because I, well, am I not

allowed to do like a normal housekeeping? or something. Did you have like a topic that was going to fill that space? Fine. Let's round off some of the conversations from last episode. We've got some good ones.

Like this one from our slash jar media. There was so much feedback about roundabouts. Rotaries. Or as you were saying, Rotaries. You said that, not me.

Me. Gaslighting me right now. Some country calls them Rotaries. That's what James was saying You read it from somewhere Yeah I would not Rotaries are a completely different thing I would not call a roundabout a rotary

And if I did That was the question right It was someone saying that In a certain part of America They call roundabouts rotaries for some reason But if you want to hear something even crazier Yeah I'll slash gel media says for housekeeping In the Middle East we call roundabouts

Circles Granted English isn't the first language of most Arab countries, but I thought I'd mention it because of how lame it is, lull. How does that make you feel? Is it called circle in the native tongue as well? I'm not sure.

It's like the word for circle. So they'll have to write in about that. In a weird way, I kind of like it. Yeah. Circles. It's just like straight to the point. Yeah. Yeah. Straight to the circle.

But then, then would they call roads lines? I think they just call them roads. I don't know, they probably call them lines. Yeah. Lines and circles. Shoots and ladders. Hmm. Hmm.

So what's a motorway then? Long line. D. Lan says, Alex's got a mullet. Now it's James's turn. I did find this out to Alex earlier today because you are close to having mullet. If you just trimmed a little bit off the sides, you could have a mullet. I've been saying I've been committing to just grow my hair out.

A, I feel like longer curly hair looks better on me. And B, let's try something different. Yeah, go maximum capacity. Yeah, I'm going maximum capacity. I'm trying to embrace the curl, as I've been saying. Yeah, grow it until you can't fit through doors. But someone replied to that comment saying, this is Sonic 2 Metro.

I actually like it. Didn't know Alex had a slight superficial side. Which I'm not saying is bad. I like it. What do they mean by that? You just got shut down. Superficial boy. Yeah, I guess it makes me superficial to want my hair girl. Is it superficial to have a mullet?

Don't know. I think... Is it superficial to care about your appearance? For a man to, yes. Okay. Eurane. E-Rain? Hmm?

Confused? What do you mean? What's E-Rain? You know, like, elaborate. Rain isn't a thing people say. It is. E-Rain. James, can you back...

Have you ever heard someone say it? Do you mean explain? No, come on, James. You know what I'm on about. I have seen no clue at you not well. E-Wain. Men are designed. to wear tank tops and shorts.

Yeah, like, have you seen, like, that restored footage of, like, dudes walking around, like, a dock in New York from, like, 1910? Yeah, yeah, everyone's the same. Because, like, men, men don't need to be different. We just need to punch hard and secretly cry harder. Cry inward to power your punches harder. Yes. Yeah. Toxic masculinity.

one-on-one with jamie and drink loads of milk or maybe don't oh well you can't not me but james can't especially not I can't drink even like a tenth of a pint of milk you were just making fun of us earlier for drinking

milk yeah I can't drink no isn't I'll be I'll be sick after like the smallest amount I can't swallow but you were making fun of us for having like a rumbly tummy if we can see it no I was making fun of you for having a wumbly tummy because you over over drink milk you over-consume it And then you get a little bit thick.

Only when I have a teaspoon of like the hottest sauce on the planet. Then I chug jug jug a two pints of milk. No, but Alex, Alex has got bad stomach because he went, binged. He binged on milk. He binged on Crave. I binged. I dary binged. This is what kind of broke me.

At lunchtime, I had like a sandwich that I'd melted cheese in it. Then for dinner I had like a flat bread that had like cheese on it. Mm-hmm. Then I drank a glove. of milk and then I was like you just drank a glass of milk by itself yeah you had a milkshake and that inspired me whereas like you know what I haven't like drunk milk like this in ages I need more so then I drank a milkshake and then I decided the next day to have cereal day because of all this milk like drinking was

inspiring to me which I never have cereal like I never have breakfast cereal but like having one day a year where just that's what you eat on that day. Yeah. You just eat cereal that day. Wait, that's all you ate that day. Yeah. What do you mean cereal?

I've never heard of cereal day. Who has cereal day? Serial killers. What do you mean who? You can create your own traditions, you know? No, but no, there's never been a day where I've been like, oh, I have cereal lunch, dinner, breakfast. Have you ever tried it?

Well, cereal. No, cereal day. No. I've had cereal. I've never had a, I didn't realize you meant to that extent. To me, a cereal day, because having cereal is so rare for me. Yeah, exactly. That's the whole thing. No, but a cereal day for me is just having a bowl.

Really? It's a treat. No, because, yeah, it is so delicious, but so bad for you. And I never normally have it. I like having that day where it's like, get a couple flavors, eat as much as cereal as you please. But I used real milk. Yeah, but it tastes better with real milk. It does take.

I disagree. No, you're right. You're wrong. You buy the barista. No. Almond milk. It tastes better than all other milk. No.

I'm a milk hater. I don't like milk. I think it's a little bit gross. So obviously I'm going to go for an alternative like almond. Is it weirder to drink almond milk than milk? No. Why? Because almonds don't come from the breast of another mammal.

I mean, I don't think you can call udder's breasts. But they are. What are they then? Nipels. I guess they have nipples. They're udders. They're a different thing. It's like one tit with multiple nipples.

No. It is. That's what udders are. Think about it. No, I've never thought of it like that. No, it's like a sack with multiple... I've always seen it more as like... Percepticals.

Three pairs or something. Three pairs? Yeah, three... What do you mean three pairs? Three pairs? No, they've got like a pink... They've got a pink tit with... multiple neples.

Um... No, but like... I'm confused. But when um... You know, I'd say that's two pairs. Yeah.

That's two pairs because... Two pairs. Because it's... It's not... They're not like flat. They're like individual like... Teats.

No, because where they they diverge is the nipple. See, that is one tit with multiple teeth. Yeah, I would say that is one teat. Yeah, that looks more like balls, to be like. But my point is, like... Oh my God.

We drink milk as a species, right? Ooh. I'm glad I don't drink milk. But we're using nuts to make fake milk. Yeah, it's healthier. But we're using nuts. Why don't we just eat almonds? Why do we need it to be in milk form?

Because it's a drink. Yeah, but it's milk. Well, no, because I, I, clarify, I did say barista almond milk. It was actually oat milk. Oh. Well, I mean, I have, I personally drink oat milk because I have a thing for oats. See, I like coconut milk because they actually have milk. Coconut milk is nice, but you can't use it for everything.

because it is an overpowering flavor. Well, it depends. I think our oat milk's first. It would be rubbish. Yeah, but tea's horrible anyway. Yeah, oat milk's the best tasting because it has an ooty flavor. Coconut tastes better than oat. That's the problem that if you want like an English breakfast, like oat overpowers it, ruins it.

No, it doesn't. Oat makes a perfect, the best tea is with oat, not with normal milk. Why don't have milk with beans? I do often pour a little dash of milk in my beans Really? No It wouldn't surprise me if some people did You know, like creamy beans

No, you put butter Butter in beans Yeah, then you get a nice thicker, buttery bass I feel like that would be sloshier Butter beans Yeah, butter beans Butter beans do exist Yeah

Well, I'll tell you what else exists Joe Spraggan who says Very surprised to hear you guys talking about the Underworld track two months off. Can I ask how you guys came across this song? It was a big track this year on the independent internet radio station, Do You? Are any of you guys fellow fans of Do You? Or Charlie Bones? No, I, Alex just... Never heard of them. The Underworld, like, have this really popular song like, and because everyone knows the really popular song, you kind of just look through their library and

you find a really good song. Yeah, I went through the whole discography. And that song stands out in particular. Because it's Slipping Jimmy. But it's basically a chart song all the time. Oh, Born Slippy. Born Slippy is like always on the radio. Yeah, it is always on the radio.

It's on the radio. It's that every English person knows it. So you're just like, oh. It was in train spotting as well. Yeah. Everybody knows it. That's where I first heard them. Yeah.

Yeah. So then I was like, oh, let's go on there, just go. Yeah. And then I listened to two months off and it's a really good song. Ronaldo's channel says, I found it interesting when you talked about the generational divide between your cousins and how you behave when you were their age. I'm a Gen Z, 18, Jarling,

and while I don't want to get too deep into what my personal beliefs are, let me just say that I think you're right in saying that exposure to the internet is a perfect way for children to become radicalized. But being brought up as a non-white American in the internet era made it so that I was thinking critically about political and social issues from a very young age. I remember one of the things that irked me about your Big Mouth Season 2 video

is that you said the kids in the show were talking about things that 13-year-olds don't think about. And while I still hate the show, I have to disagree with you on that point. Most of my friends and I were talking about politics in our early teens, and it never once occurred to me that you guys might have not. but then I remember that the internet landscape was very different when you guys were my age.

Yeah, it just didn't exist. I didn't think of politics. Yeah, politics was always something like adults talk about. Yeah, there was that and there was, I can't remember if I was like in sick form around this age. It was more like the atheism stuff was the big thing on YouTube, like the amazing atheist and all these debates about religion. It was before 2016, that's what I remember. most and then that's when their political content really went nuts was around that time um yeah interesting to think about there no my question would be that once you're aware of politics and

you keep track of what's going on it's inherently depressing and you you depress yourself by consuming it so as a kid why would you want to be depressed but it's it's not like they're engaging with politics but no just being aware of it is enough but even then it's it's just a change of consensus you know like the calling people gay

and using the F slur all the time was a thing when we were that age but these kids now are aware that you shouldn't do that but they're also being exposed

to loads of like opinions which aren't like display as just fact so before before you're given the opportunity to actually form an opinion based on what you know about politics you're just told X Y and Z so then it becomes your belief yeah I feel like people are just I don't know less trustworthy now as well mm-hmm the sources things they find they might

yeah I think I think that's a really good thing they it's good until you get to the people who've done their own research and it's like it just means they've like watched two joe rogan episodes yeah you know what i mean critical thinking it's a difficult skill to to learn yeah and you can't believe anything ever anymore yeah go off the grid believe nothing learn nothing lewis aspen said nice cut copy sound bite at the start alex would like to know some of your more obscure music tastes some same for the other boys I like the eels, who do a song on every Shrek film, I think. TV on the radio, Alex Goldfrapp, interest to see if you've heard of those.

I love all of those. I'm big fan of the Eels as well. Going over to Susan's house, she's going to make it right. I can't separate the Eels from the Shrek, so I've never really gotten into them. It's not that I dislike Shrek, it's just... Because Dad would always listen to the eels when we were young, I associated it with him before I did with Shrek and then, like, realized that a bunch of the music is in Shrek.

But Shrek's got some good music in there. It does. Chet Jha Changes. The cool cover of a Changes. Yeah, the epic Changes cover. I only like mainstream music, you know, the weekend. Duo Lipo. Lizzo?

Lizo, yeah. Arena Garriande. Mm. Yeah, that's me all over, really. Yeah? Yeah. Had any of Arkelley's new one? Yeah, kind of, um, really sort of, like...

Avant-Garde. Yeah, unique perspective. Hmm, Remy says Swindon born Jarling here. To answer Alex's question, yes, I was in fact born in the Wilcher Citadel of Swindon. As for my fellow Swiddites, I encourage them to join me and rise up and claim their place as proud Swidders Jarlings. But until such a time, I'm more than happy to claim the title as my own. Bad luck, mate. Cameron Blumer says, I'm from Milton Keynes and it is all.

awful if you're a pedestrian. But as a driver, it's the best place in the UK. The grid and roundabout system means you can get from one end of the city to the other in 10 minutes max, with multiple access points to any way you need to go. Pedestrians are still kind of fuck, though, so it's poo-poo bum hole.

Epic. Where is Milton Keynes? No one knows. Is it real? No. It's in Israel. It sounds like one of those fake fantasy names. Milton Keynes

Do you think We've got to get to Milton Keynes All I know It sounds too shit to be real No it would be like in Willow or something Something's shit All I know about Milton Keynes Yeah Willer

All I know about Milton Keynes is it has Costco Hmm How are you There's loads of places have Costco though No don't They do Where here has Costco Why don't we get a Costco

Because you can go and then get like 20 donuts Like two pound and it's amazing But no, I don't get that I don't get that Cost Cutters Cost Co There's apparently like some cake they do

That's really good Or something Milton Keynes Yeah you gotta go to Keynes to get it Um Yeah Wow Alex I feel like Alex

You'd love Costco Because it's all in bulk I love bulk I love bulk buying You do You have to have some kind of like special Costco license Right

You show at the door no normies aren't allowed in you've got to have your like you've got to like declare that you want to cut your cost yeah the government's got to allow it the Costco

government oh the car you look at me like that I've never been have I I'm learning over here yes I'm learning too and you're you're the teacher at the moment once the government have found out that you're you're evading tax they give you access to Costco.

Because if you're evading tax, you might as well save a few more pennies, so they let you into Costco. Yeah. Don't know why my card isn't turned up yet, government. There's my Costco card. Yeah, Kroonogurik says, I suggest you hide in your bath

and fill it with ice to hide your heat signature because I'm coming. Why do so many people that want to kill me? I don't know. What's the deal? Yeah. Your name is I hate everything. Oh.

Yeah, they're like, Wait, but I like certain things. Wait a minute, I just realized I like a certain everything. If you like, okay, if you say that you like, now you hate people dying, they're not going to come for you. That's actually genius. You can't kill what you hate.

Yeah. Last one here from Dr. Ryan. This is insane. I am a zookeeper in Chicago, and I regularly feed the hippo, the hippos, day-old sausages, so they have a taste of their home. I put strings on the sausages and swing them around the hippos. They get so mad at me and scream, but it's an obsession. Sometimes the hippos try and break out of their cages, but I keep swinging those hot dogs in wide circles over their heads. luckily my boss doesn't know

I do this all my co-workers this is balls no no no that's not true why are sausages the taste of home um I don't know the hippos eat sausages in the wild

maybe they would nah they just eat like moss or some shit then yeah what do hippos eat are they're like the most dangerous animal I thought of a vegetarian but they will just like destroy anything that comes near

yeah they're like seeing videos of like people putting like watermelons in their mouth and they just go yeah everyone's seen those videos well he's just saying he's seen them what's wrong with that no it's a statement that Alex has seen them

which isn't wrong well I guess you're right though or am I right boys got a couple topics I don't know if you guys I had anything you want to throw out No, not really. I got a couple of possibles.

Okay, give us a possibility. This one's going to annoy James, probably. But this comes from the Smith-Smithsonian magazine. Goblin mode is Oxford's 22 word of the year. The term describes behaviour that's unapologetically self-indulgent, lazy, slovenly or greedy. How does that make you feel? What? Yeah.

Being a goblin is to be self-indulgent. Read it again. From the beginning. Read this again. Goblin mode is Oxford's 2022 word of the year, even though it's two words. Which means... The term describes behavior that's unapolog...

I can't say that. Unapologetically. Self-indulgent, lazy, slovenly. or greedy for the first time in history Oxford Dictionaries allowed the public to vote on its 2022 word of the year the winner goblin mode

that makes sense goblin mode received an overwhelmingly overwhelming majority of votes against two other contenders metaverse and hashtag I stand with selected by Oxford lexicographers.

They just let anything into the dictionary now. Yeah. It's just like a string of words. Well, that's now a word in the Oxford Dictionary. Goblin mode. Like, it should have been goblin. Well, I assume goblins already in the dictionary. Well, yeah.

But the vote should have been for goblin or mode. Not goblin mode. That's... Surely that's a phrase. Yeah. Goblin mode is a phrase. A phrases in the dictionary? No.

Goblin mode is describing the mode in which you behave like a goblin. Yeah. I don't know. What's this, what's this, what's, what's this country coming to? This political correctness gone mad. In a way. Gone goblin mode. Oh, yeah.

Well, I think the politicians are going goblin mode, allowing people to run ramp what episode has we gone the most goblin mode um normal episode no the most goblin mode was curry episode no i no i disagree i disagree there is another chaotic one in there chaos unleashed or the chaotic episode but everyone that it's not chaos is too energetic goblin mode is like greedy yeah greed greed greed greed hunger yeah also sloth Yeah Okay yeah

I've never really Associated goblins With sloth Slotherlies you know No I Well I just picture like a green little Villain The green goblin

He's cheeky Yeah Nauty Like cheeky little Lloyd Has a villainous streak Yeah Are elves goblins No no no no

No elves Hmm But then like Santa's elves as elves are like little guys but the elves in Lord of the Rings are like eternal guardians yeah guardians of the galaxies you know

yeah I mean it's it's just sort of a pick and mix variety bucket yeah a pick and mix kind of goblin no no we're talking about elves elves aren't goblins elves gobble goblins no goblins gobbled elves yeah

gobbled no goblins gobbled No, goblins are more closely related to orcs and they are elves. Yeah. James has a magnificent point. Like, you've got orcs, the big meaty boys, and then the little gremlins of orcs are the goblins. Well, what's a gremlin then? They're the even smaller goblins.

What's a goblin? We were just talking about what gobbins. They're like a worse little ork. Yeah, orcs are like a little bit more dangerous. Goblins are just a little bit... Orks actually have like a society, you know, a horrible society. But orc society is founded upon the oppression of goblins and gremlins. They're the little workers and the orcs, like abuse their little workers.

Yeah, I can see goblins being used like that. So that's why goblins are a little bit evil and mischievous because they're trying to get one up on the orcs. That doesn't, that sounds like they're justified in their acts. The goblins, yeah, absolutely. But that's when they start terrorising air. everyone else. But I imagine goblins is like they've got no like government. They've got no governing authority.

They just sort of... What about the goblin king? That implies some kind of hierarchy. No, I don't think there's a goblin king. Maybe a goblin is just the biggest goblin. But then the biggest goblin's an ork. So they're the same species? No, they're not the same species. A subspecies that only lives in caves or something.

No, no, they're just the workers or their worker orcs. No, they're not orcs. They're goblins. I thought like, like in Lord of the Rings, which is it, One of the races is like elves in the dark That have gone Yeah, the Falma basically

Yeah They're not goblins Because they're elves They're just a little bit So that's what orcs are then No, no no Orcs aren't elves Orks are orcs

Oaks were elves No no I don't No I don't Ours were elves Yeah but Lord of Rings There's more than just Orks and elves That's the true one

That's the one that you can't No it's not Yeah Where do you think they all got it from No I don't believe in that portrayal of goblins and orcs. Well, you're making your own one now.

I'm not. The whole worker thing. The enslavement of the goblin race. Oh, this is interesting. In the Tolkien one anyway, orcs are goblins. Yeah, so, so, so orcs are evolved goblins.

But they don't evolve. They get, like, made by evil. Orcs were a race of humanoid creatures, best known for their service as foot soldiers and slaves to the dark lords even when not in thrall to an evil master or orcs rarely if ever had non-violent interactions with elves men or dwarves they were known by many names by the various peoples ohu kai uh well they're the hyper-evolved orcs no they were just orks no they're like they're different they're special they're like a subspecies of

orc No, but you're saying subspecies Well, they're the same, but they're like a sect They're like a fresh new So what are goblins in Ordwings on that? I can't picture them because I was picturing the orichy as the orcs

Because, but they're In the Hobbit, they go to the goblin king Yeah, and there's like a goblin society Like underground That's true, but they're like, they've got no power They're just like in a cave. Yeah, they're like bottom dwellers Yeah

Yeah, which is what goblins are Yeah I don't know man What is the like What are the definitive versions in your mind For like goblins Definitive versions Do you see like a

What do you picture? Green Because I kind of picture like a Dobby type thing No, bigger than do you even though in that universe they're elves. Oh no, let's not bring up Harry Potter, come on. I'm thinking like three, four-foot-tall little green hue, pop belly. I'd say half the size of human, because orcs are bigger than humans.

They're big, meatier chunkier. They're just like... What's the definitive orc then? A big, a huge big green boy. Like a huge big green boy. With teeth or not? Like a World Warcraft Yeah, Warhammer, World Warcraft

That's an ork Like a big meaty boy Who just smash you Yeah, I think about a warcraft For some reason When I think of an ork Which means you think of Warhammer I think of the...

I think of the orc from Lord of the Rings That wants to eat the hobbits Are those not Urukai? No, the ones that's the one to eat the hobbit No, that's not an ork They don't need their legs They're a troll Oh no, that's a goblin

Oh yeah, there are trolls. I forgot about trolls. No, trolls are like giant hulking. Yeah, yeah. Trolls are bigger than orcs. What about dwarves? Dwarves, they're tiny. But like what version in like fiction do you like thinking?

They're mostly pretty similar. Yeah, out of all those, they probably are the most consistently similar. Just how they're like visually depicted a lot of the time. Stoky, chunky. axes, beards. Big beards. Yeah. Play the guitar.

Have cannons and machine guns. What? Degon-a-na-er-d-d-on-a-l... Yeah, I just want to... Oh. What's a hobgoblin then? A cross between a goblin. They're like poison goblins.

They're like the little crafters. They like brew the stews and make all the little gimsos and gadgets. The gimzoes. And the gadgets, yeah. Hmm. Well, that's got me thinking about Gobblers now. Yeah, Goblin Law.

Well, it is in the dictionary now. That means it's academic. It is academic. J.R.R. Martin wrote it. Um, the other thing I kind of wanted to mention was, um, I found this, this YouTuber who I just went, I just was watching a bunch of his videos

and it was like this flash from the past awesome discovery I'm just curious if you guys have heard of him he's called the LA Beast ever heard of him about LAG lag no no no the LAG

LAG could teach you a few things my brother no I'm talking about the LA Beast the LAB he's um you remember shoe nice right yeah shoe nice he'd like drink bottles of absinth and yeah shampoo and just like basically kill himself on

camera it's kind of like that except a little bit less upsetting because he's you know yeah there's something a bit sad about the shoe nice situation but this guy the la beast he's he's pushing himself to limits and these best these videos are like from years ago a lot of them he's pushing himself in ways where I'm shocked at the human body can even and withstand these things. Like, the one that really got me was, he eats two cacti. Like, he eats them.

Like proper spiky ones? Yeah. I feel like I should have just show you it, to be honest. I don't know if I want to. No, it's like, it's crazy. He's biting into them like their cucumbers. Oh, I don't know, it seems like a, bruh. The shit is the most compelling

shit you've ever seen. It's crazy. How big are the spikes? It's like one of the really horrible ones that really properly get stuck. Not like that one. More like that fluffy one there. In the background.

Yeah, the fluffy one. Yeah. Like the fluffy one. Ooh. No, that's not good. Oh, what? But yeah, here we go. Yeah.

LA Beast eats a cactus from eight years ago. eight years ago yeah is he alive he's alive yeah um is he happy this is like old youtube type stuff

like in the the title of one of the videos it's like got the bracket saying warning what the fuck that kind of awesome shit I'll show you some it starts with a warning

cactus is 100% safe to consume and is not poisonous but do not attempt to recreate or reenact the activity scene no to be fair they are quite no those fucking those have the worst needles

they just get caught and everything he's got a simple challenge and that is eating a few cacti well he's got a captain america shield yeah head of the curve By children of Poseidon and Laf Phoenix Who are both

On different occasions Eat me Oh no Oh no No Why he doesn't eat both Does he? Nah, no, come on, stop this, stop

No, you need to see Why? Why does he have to eat two? I don't know why he has to eat two But he's like shaking and everything No, this is not a good fascination No, this is awesome No, but if that surprised you, you know someone's eating a whole plane Yeah, no, I've seen that before

Um, but there's this one I've, there's this video that he did where he like eats this notoriously stinky plant or something. Stinky. Yeah. Yeah, I'll find it. Because there's this, there's this moment in the video where like, he clearly hasn't told his roommate or something that he's going to be doing this. So there's this little moment of like genuine drama in the video where this guy comes in. He's like, what the fuck, man? Yeah, it's this.

I was just going through all these videos and I found this moment of pure fucking unscripted drama. Yeah. That's bad. Yeah, so it's this one. It's the durian fruit versus LA Beast. It's like this notoriously stinky thing. I need a fork. Alright.

Holy shit, man. What does that smell, dude? What are you doing? Can you please record when I'm not here, man? You're gonna piss the neighbors off. That smells like, please shit. Fuck you. Fuck you, man.

You fucking serious? Fuck. Okay, fucking asshole, ladies and gentlemen, that's my fucking roommate. Stuff doesn't smell that bad at all. And that was a dick move. He just walked right in front of the camera and interrupted my video. So, let me regain my proposal here. That was a dick move.

Fucking asshole. He used to think. fruit that's actually quite uncomfortable that's more uncomfortable than the cactus thing really yeah stinky fruit man get your stinky fruit LAP people are different yeah they're beasts man yeah no I'm gonna have to um forgo my my my name my name sake no you're allowed to be the no I'm I'm I haven't eaten a cactus. No, but you're not the LA beast.

I'm not the LA Beast. I guess you're the UK beast. No, it's not even that. Yeah, the only thing I eat is like kebabs. You have to be hardy to pick yourself through some of those sometimes. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, maybe if you don't order the chili sauce. No, that's what holds it together, my bro.

You ever see after these messages. Buy bear bear, bear. I do declare buy bear bear bear bear. Bear bear shirts and mug available now Check the description below What is your opinion on the screen I don't know It doesn't bother me

It's one you're indifferent on Yeah I'm generally indifferent on most things you do Really? It doesn't make good drama media content if I'm like Don't react So I've got to react That's like a unique one Because

No reaction to something so crazy That's not crazy That's not crazy Okay, you do it then No I'm a mature man I'm a mature boy And I don't need to do

So being mature means not No because my new divergent Comes out in other ways Not in screaming Divergent comes out in this way Yours and Jamie You both come out the same way Mine doesn't

I'm more like a You know our dog gets zoomies I get that Zoomers I generally just like have like periods of such intense emotion where it's like I sometimes make awful purchases because I'm just so excited. Last night it was close but I was going to buy some wheels but they were two and a half grand and I was like you know what I can't you nearly came close to buying them yes Jesus

two and a half grand oh they're cool wheels no wheels are cool enough for that kind of moula mula money money I'm alone. Good afternoon, morning, evening on our ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the second half of the show where we head over to Patreon

and answer some really cool questions. Patreon. Reddit. What's up, gamers? Reddit time. Wee, we, we, bam, babe, bam. Yum.

The softest bulletin is going to start us off here. Which you can also do if you head over to the suggestion thread on the subreddit. How many? sides does a banana have? None.

It's circular. Idiot. Circular? It's one. One? Yeah. None. I'm with James on this.

No, honestly, it's a banana, which means you can crush it. You think about the skin or the interior. No, because you can crush a banana and just make it a flat. You're talking about the skin or the interior? That's a good question, because which do they mean? What is a, which one is the banana or both the banana is one just the skin of a banana? But to be fair, you're the one who's the most experience with banana skins. No, because...

The banana is it in a skin. Like... No, the bananas all of it. Yeah. Like, if I took my skin off, is my skin on its own... No, this is the question I asked before. No, this is what I say. Is your arm you?

You say my arm. Is it you? Or is it like an attachment? My banana. Cog site. Subrasn, M2.03 grenade launcher. I'd say a banana is

the meat and the skin. It needs to be a combo slice. So there, it depends on the banana. Some bananas have three faces. Some bananas have four. I think you're looking too deep into a question that's pretty meaningless.

I think there's meaning. No, because sometimes a banana has like angles yeah they're not like a they're not like a they're not like a cucumber cucumbers have angles really small uh uh tetrahedrons yeah like magnanimonidrons yeah like magnanimitrons magnanimus reasons well chris peacons actually replied to that saying Alex please agree with whatever james says just so jim can feel what it's like when james teamed up against every episode for the last

304 episodes we don't do that we don't Alex do we team up against no fucking way do we do that okay gaslight me then gaslight gate keep

no no way we'll revert to monkeys says if Char had its own Lego game what would the secret unlockable characters be the stages

the collectibles the plot Okay, the plot would be that there's been some some secret things stolen from jar media And the villain name Okay I would say the plot is You know like multiverse of madness No

Okay, how about Fortnite Yeah Imagine it's just a bit of everything Yeah So we're like the base You know like Fortnite Yeah We're like the foundation

We're like the foundation. Yeah, we're the original and then these cracks slash tears slash vortexes or black holes, whatever you want to call them. George Clooney walks in, Lego George Clooney comes in. Mm-hmm. He does all the voices. Yeah, he does James. Yeah. James and George Clooney have a weird amount of stuff in common.

James does leak a lot of, um, fucked up drone strike. stuff to try and yeah james has his own satellite above israel watching war crimes that's what you mean by car parts yeah satellite what do you think the ganja satellite is James gets high and watches his his drone strike the stages i feel like the game would open in a bog of some kind yeah you know with one with one of those you know those air machines with the fan and george cluny um is trying to get to the helicopter with an m16 in um oh we got a race to get to cluny who's like he's hanging from the ladder and the helicopter come on yeah and then yeah that's the opening level once you're out the bog takes you to like the

hq which is like the jazz set um but but you're the size of a mini-fix so it's huge yeah yeah and then you go to like different universes collecting yeah dibbies there could be a dibby planet yeah the dibby planet just like multiverse of madness and the collectibles can be George Clooney's

ex-spouses yeah and there can be a whole level that's just every different character George Clooney has played as many of it is so you're doing like Oceans 11

Oceans 1 through 12 fantastic Mr Fox Mm-hmm. Burn after reading. Yep. That's like all every... Batman. Batman, yeah.

The Dark Night. Yeah. You got any ideas of what the collectible would be, James? Dippies. Yeah, that's probably solid. And shit. Like tat, you pick up, like, chit.

They would be a whole Men in Black international level. Yeah. All the best properties will be like coming in yeah there's a nazi zombies level a nazi russians level yeah but you've got collect tanked empty and what like you know like you get the mini kits and it builds one thing what is it building cod characters you build uh dangerous dictators you build uh dangerous dictators Kevin Spacey from Call the Duty.

You collect all the villains from God. Oh, I found John Snow. Nice. Okay. No, some of these ideas for stages are just going too far in my head. Um, uh, yeah, man. Milkie, milky boy. Darth Valacard says,

apologies if this has been answered before, but has Alex's voice got deeper. He's lost some of that upbeat meme tinge to his voice. I've noticed this because I've been listening to the 2018-2019 jarcasts. Yeah, Alex is like, he started smoking cigars. Yeah. Alex is just an angrier person as well. Yeah.

angrier had much more many more spirits I've been slowly chipping through those cigars you got me really mm-hmm I love them this was like fucking a hundred years ago idiot I think it was when Jim came back from Spain through the you know the diabolical we have all the reduced prices no I I just bought them in a in a shop you're saying about your trip from from when you got me a horrible shirt? Yeah, that one, yeah. Yeah, I got a shirt that I don't wear

and you, Alex Cross Cigars. You don't like anything. Shut up, I like things. Okay. Jean Issterd says, I must ask, have Alex and Jamie ever had a really bad fallout or anything like that?

Multiple times. You actually made Jamie smash a window and then blamed it on him. Well, I mean, I did smash. smash it. But it was his fault?

I punched you in the face that one time by accident. That was very much a James moment. I'm pretty sure we've talked about that. Yeah. Me and Jamie

have had loads of fallouts. Yeah. We've actually had... Vegas, four, three. Fuck. No, we've actually had a few fallout, like, genuine, like... Not as adults, though.

Well, as kids, yeah. And as... as as as adults as well I wouldn't call them like fallouts though you just make me angry when you're falling out as adults what do we what do we disagree on there was the time James called me he was like spam calling me oh no was pre-occupied and then was very rude on the phone and then hung up on me and that pissed me off so I wanted an apology so I asked for one. Did you get one?

Eventually. Yeah. No, no, this is the thing. James was like, I'm sorry, you felt that way. I was like, yeah, not good enough. Yeah, because you're, we all suffer

from this actually, but me the least is hangar. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, you get angry. Yeah, man. Because you, you like, spam called me. I was at work. Okay, so this was the time we were going to

Samis. We're getting a Sammies specifically. Yeah, and I hadn't finished work, and James was like spam calling me, and then I answer after I finish, and you were like, what are we doing? I was like, well, I just finished work, like, what's going on? And you were like, we're going here, blah, blah, blah, and then you hung up. And I was like, what? I was like, why did I deserve that? You know? No, but as soon as you got to Sammies, I was just like, yeah, I'm sorry. I gave you,

like, I said, I gave you a good apology, and I was just like, you. No, you did genuinely apologize, but you just had to reflect for a moment, because you were hungry, and we've all been there, but... No, I think there's more to those, those than just hunger. Does Bubsie need a snicker? Other than that, when's nothing happens? No. I get angry at him more. What have I done?

Maybe the occasional... But that's okay, I thought. I mean, to relieve, like... Yeah. Sometimes needed. There are things in life that might not be... The things that you need.

I'll tell you what we do need is to answer this one from Dug Walker Fan 27. Which right-wing political commentator would each man member of the castby. Personally, I'd say Jim is Alex Jones, James is Jordan Peterson, and Alex is either Stephen Crowder or Booger Nick. Thanks. None of us won out here.

Hey, no, I have. I would say, like, yeah, I would say Jordan Peterson's a lot better than Alex Jones, Stephen Crowder, and Booger Nick. Yeah, I'd take him any day out of all those options. At least Jordan B. Peterson has a lane that he kind of actually knows about. It's actually a professional win.

Yeah, and he got a whole movie, about him, so that's kind of cool. Yeah, and he got to be Red Skull in the comics. He got to be Red Skull in the comics. Yeah, did you not know about that one? That's awesome. They, like, base the Red Skull on him. What is with that?

Why, like, why fan the flames? It's just the culture war, you know? You just get a... What you're getting out of it is a fantastic clip of Jordan Peterson crying. And then everyone feels sorry for him and goes, well, I guess he's right about him. everything. Yeah.

Fine. Okay. What the hell are you doing? Why are you like this? Who's Matt Walsh? Oh, no. Matt Walsh is the biggest fucking pussy. That's you?

James is Matt Walsh. Fuck you. Fuck you. You can be Lauren Southern. I don't know who that is. Oh, she's running. the boat in the bridge channel and I started like screaming at migrants. There's quite a few of them to pick for him to be honest.

Your sagon of a card. Oh no. Carl. Carl of Swindon. Yeah. He's Nigel. Nigel Thorough. Farage.

Oh, Nigel Farage. Um. Billy. Pierce Morgan. James is Andrew Tate, actually. You are. Fuck on. No.

No. Don't call me out of date I'm the least like him Did you like Did you like my tweet on the JAR account That was just JAR Media 2016 With the You went through with it then

Yeah Yeah So no one would see it Smart Sometimes you have to say the things That Did anybody else hear that Yeah

Pinky and the brain Brain Brain Brain Yeah, why are you standing over there? You got diarrhea? You are? We're just playing within the bounds of the question, my dear. Okay, what liberal memas are we? No, I think, honestly...

Is this Hassan Piker? Yeah. Yeah, champagne show fliers. Alex is... Alex's... Alex's... Alex is Jared Leto. Thanks. Well, no, the left thing has nobody. Did he do?

I'm the amazing atheist because I like it in the ass. With a banana. Ah. Use the bit I don't use. Here you go, atheist. I love when it comes full circle. All right, fucking A-team. Or should I say banana circle?

I love when I'm a-team. plan comes together. I love when a plan becomes a banana circle. Maybe a banana does have one side then if it's the circle. My back really, really hurts sitting like this. Don't then? Don't do it then, binkie. Shut up!

Do you not care about your posture? Oh, no, bab, bah, ma. Aw. Well, um, cherry rabbit loz says question for Alex. Okay. Your hair in the latest cast was curl tacular. Okay. What hair products do you use for your curly hair?

Have you noticed that Alex picks all the questions that complement him? Oh, maybe he is superficial. No, I don't. How do I? I'll bring up anything and everything. Okay, no, someone make a jar compilation of how many times Alex has answered questions that complement each member. Yes. See the ratio of it.

This question is for Alex. How epic is your Lego? Well, my Lego is rather quite epic, I would say so. You should see this leak that's coming up. Do it. You know there's going to be a huge imbalance between. no not true try try try and name three different things this episode last week the week before no that's not examples you're just saying um a while ago you mentioned

embracing the curls which is something my sister admires you saying this is the second time we've had a question about your hair on this episode no not true that is true he literally talked about um mullets at the beginning oh no they the person in that comment said they liked your hair. They complimented you were. Don't try and fucking wiggle out this one. That was a different one I purpose didn't comment so you wouldn't give me shit for it. Ooh. But you brought it up anyway. Um, yeah,

my sister admires you saying she has curly hair and does all she can to keep it curled. She also hates She-Holt because she felt as though it goes against curly hair since the character has straightened and Hollywood-styled hair when she turns into She-Hulk. Good point. So true.

Yeah. The answer's cold water. That is all you need. What? Mm-hmm. What? Like actual cold water. Um... I do that at the end of like every shower is make the water cold, run my hair through it. And then I got this curl spraying here.

I don't. Yeah, and then... And then it... Yeah. That's the thing I've worked for our best. If... If... The true way of man is to...

is to not use products. What products do gorillas use? Eucalyptus. Allo Vera. No, but do you know who here who uses the most products? Your mom. Gardening gorillas. Gardening gorillas.

No, you. Me? Yeah. Yeah, superficial boy. Yeah. Oh. Please, and don't destroy me, criticize me. Go, please.

How's that a criticism? you're just superficial and shallow as a puddle, mate shallow as the Glossier face washing Yeah I got no shame When it comes to the different items

I'd smother Self care Ha ha ha Ha ha No self care He James has no self care I have self care

He attacks No no I have self care I have self care I've got a nice little Coco butter You use kitchen scissors to shave your beard No I have an actual beer trimmer

Which I use cocoa butter Conditional one every day Oh Speaking of superficial boy We've got a duo Hey I like my beard being soft Because when you get facial You don't want it to be

You know quite bristle And not pleasant If it's soft it's nicer So I use that And I use I recently upgraded from like A Nivia generic Like moisturiser

to like a nice hydrating Laurel moisturiser and it's from a gel from a cream to a gel and it's like

damn I feel good when I'm slopping that gel all over my face give me that cream give me that gel um can we do a jar vote

sure yeah um an audience jar vote no no no no no no no no I don't like that

what's the vote that you guys get um like mutton chops with the moustache you just you just want me to be that Call of Duty character.

Yes. No, to be fair, no, because Alex doesn't do it ever. Alex doesn't do anything. Whenever there's a bet like this. No, I saw, I saw this dude, this like older guy driving this old-ass car, and he had it full on. Like the Call of Duty to Captain Price. I could probably put it off with my facial hair. Yeah, it's a cool look.

But I would need some more years on me. yeah but I think you guys should do it just for a social experiment I can see it we could go for the bugger neck tash I don't

you always talk about bugger neck but I'd know nothing about the guy but I have a problem with that yeah no I have a problem with British people saying the word bugger

yeah it's wrong Booger. Booger. Or a boogernick. Yeah, it's fucked. Just like when Americans try and say the word mirror. Mere. Mere. I gotta go look in the mirror.

Mirror. Shut up. Ah. Don't believe the Americans. What? We're from the southwest. It's where their accent comes on. Hello there.

Gonna go look in the mirror. Hello there. Dobby We got the final I don't think this is gonna be funny You don't even know what it's gonna be No you're gonna love this one specifically You've just spoken way too soon

Because Man War is 12 says With all the recent discussions surrounding the Everglades I thought I'd tell you guys A Swamp story featuring my friends And I getting attacked by pigs In 2018 I went on a school trip To New Orleans and the school took us on a swamp tour

of the bayou as a fun activity with the fan boats and everything. It's not exactly the Everglades but it's nearly an almost the exact same climate. We knew it was going to be interesting when it took them over 20 minutes to start the boat and the fan engine sounded like it could explode at any minute. It's not a good time if it doesn't sound like it's going to explode at any moment.

That's like the most... That's what you live for. Yes. Our captain had a long bleached blonde mullet and what might be the most comical sounding swamp man accent I've ever heard in my life a great comparison to his look and vibe would be Joe Exotic from Tiger King

he would summon the gators by waving a hot dog on a stick over the side what the hell is going on with this hot dog shit and they would jump up and eat it off the stick why they picked that over his equally exposed hand I'll never know my friends and I question the legality of feeding wild animals before remembering we were in the south. Other highlights included an albino raccoon and guard peacocks that the swamp dwellers used to keep the alligators away from

their goats. I'm not shitting you, I have photographic proof. Apparently gators have bad eyesight and they just see a big screaming ball of color and back off. The gators were cool, but main danger that I think you guys have been overlooking in the Everglades and not the alligators, but the huge invasive population of feral hogs in the area that swim around the swamp causing chaos. It may sound weird because they're pigs, but these things are actually fucking gigantic. They weigh 200 to 400 pounds with large tusks and smell just as bad as you imagine they do. There's about a million of them in Louisiana, and they cause 75 million dollars worth of property damage per year. But they're not widely hunted because they taste like shit.

Our captain would literally dump buckets of corn into the swamp to get them to come towards the boat causing a feeding frenzy where about 10 of them were fighting over the scraps of corn just floating in the swamp The largest bore was called Bebo and the captain said he's been feeding him for years and that Bebo would eat out of his hand I'm sure I'm sure you can see where this is going But Bebo bit his hand Identified the source of the corn was in the boat

boat and attempted to climb up into it, at which point my 20-ish 14 to 19-year-old classmates and I started screaming in absolute terror. Fortunately, after some swearing, the captain was able to dislodge Bebo with the kick to the snout by the time he was about halfway into the boat. Luckily, he did because Bebo would definitely be far too heavy to move if he'd actually been able to flop his ass into the boat. I'm not sure what we would have done if given the choice between a 400-pound feral hog and the literal alligator infested swamp outside it's really funny now but at the time it was

really scary needless to say i'll not be taking another swamp tour basically what i'm trying to say is who would win in a fight bebo or motomoto long time listener since the death of old jar but only commented a few times just wanted to say keep up the good work and release dubstep harker too so you think he's lying why just because of the bebo thing it's dog whistling for what the sausage the swinging sausages around

is dog whistling for lies if there's a sausage in a story it's not true no but here's a crazy he's a crazy left field opinion how when have you ever heard a story that involves a sausage that turn out to be will none

sausages don't need to be in stories I don't know why they Sausages are never in stories. Name the last time you saw a movie with a sausage in it. Sausage badsy. Yeah, a lie. Yeah.

Trash. Why do you think that movie didn't work? Because sausages were the main characters. And buns were the women. Yeah. Well, go on. Put forth your...

Yeah, so my strong opinion is that the... hippo sausage guy is real and the pig swamp guy is fake the Bebo stuff just yeah that's too much yeah I can't believe it

in saying that though he said he had evidence and I did click the link to an imgo with like a bunch of pictures from this trip did you reverse image search did you actually check the validity I didn't go that far you can't prove it's right until that happens

we need like a symbol a symbol yeah to prove things true you there's a symbol what well you gotta do the thing you like write

the like hold a newspaper up and like stand by the bore or whatever yeah then we know it's real yeah so like no but we could have like a gang sign

so like if you actually if you truthfully meet Ryan Reynolds you take a photo with him and do your make Ryan Reynolds do the gang sign yeah and then get him arrested Yeah, no more Christmas movies for a while

Christmas movies Is Ryan Reynolds in Christmas movies? He's in that show called like binted or whatever Like binted Hold on Oh fucking Alex's bintet thing again No, I'm done, Alex When I start saying bint, I'm done

No, I'm trying to find it I do because I saw I saw a poster for this Ryan Reynolds movie that's like on Apple shit and I was like there's no way this is real this must be advertising of some kind but it's like a real movie it looks like it was

you know forged from a fucking algorithm here we are yeah spirited yeah looks like just the worst thing ever made yeah it doesn't get worse than that you're Will Ferrell and fucking

tiny eyes over here being kind of Comedies. Micro eyes. Micro eyes and... Yeah. I shifted it to be better. To be nicer.

Yeah, to fix his eyes. Yeah, I gave him big eyes and little eyes, little tiny eyes. Eh? I'm done. Shit like that really upsets James. Well, the air thing. That's it. Where is it? Every day, day and every night, night,

James is going to fight, fight, fight to win. No, I need that for wrapping presents. Oh. Oh, you're going to be back to brown, is it? Do you know how many years I've had that role? Yeah, because you never buy Christmas brothers, do you? No, I do. It's just a huge, like, industrial bulk-bought role that lasts me literally like five years.

You get it from Costco? Everyday day and every... Time to phone up buggerneck. Today's calling is buggerneck. Who's gonna extinguish this flame? Your mom. That's your... You made that.

Yeah. I'd never used it before. Pah! Now it's here. It's already lit, you cock. you cock. Yeah, it's really lit. It's really lit as fuck, bro. Dude, what are you doing?

Don't waste all the gas. Yeah. Yeah, oh, I can... Here we go. No. I can give you the law, bro. The loyal? The law.

Of what? Oh, okay. I'm not interested in Bougar Nick. Get to know the Navi people and their fantastical home in Avatar. James Cameron's blockbuster phenomenon streaming now.

On what? Deeper? Deeper? Yeah, Dpler. Bob Eiger Plus. Bob Eiger? Yeah. Biger.

You ready, gamers from Mars? Ow! I could hear that from over the yon yonder. Hmm. Good afternoon. Ha ha ha ha. Good afternoon, morning, evening or night, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the second half the show where we go to Patreon and we say thank you. Thank you to.

Thank you to one of these. All of these. Reformed Orthodox Rabbi Bill Clinton. Perth Australia, Jarling Mito. Boxing Day 10 a.m. at the City Cactus. Juicy Rosie. Ashley. Abigail M. The Swindon Everglade. Judy Burns. Lollin. Waboo Keck Croc. James page him the 50 pounds where I'll come over there and smash up the laurel. I'm not even joking right now. Lildred Incorporated. Cartoon Grump. Rat Chef. Seishin. James pulls a darkside fill and goons on a live stream. He's been banned from the internet ever since. Finn Arthur's Vivian Reed Matt

Why is their ass grass growing from my golden pussy Michael Caraman Chocolate fart Scribble Wah Matt Heffley Bonkey Shartaroos Splink

Rasmus Real Cretto King Jarls the 3rd Skech Italia Magma Slug On the witness stand losing his nerve hollering

I'm not crazy A pause as the courtroom is shocked silent Levi Pearl Slug Dr. Deluxo Shabangu Oliver Holm Jarnby Gucci Guna I love Barbor Bell

She is my queen Women of Reddit What's the sexiest sexy sex experience you've had with a gamer Smettliest Jar Patreon Neothio Woman woman girl girl woman James's dad

Zell Simon Steele A massive thank you and Merry Cringmust to James's Dad James' Dad, James' Dad, James' Dad and Dobby's Gynecologist Balfreikour Toe, Piss from Your Penis

Tanster Boy, aka James' Mickey D. Microbiota Hot on the Micahen in your get I'm out of ammo, the 11-year jarling James' dad and Chris Pratt stars in Baby James the movie Big thank you too

Big up Soulsbury Better than Srinan Fartis Quill muncher Unwashed reptile The forlorn Pisk Piscator

My Mai someone Fetch a priest You can't say no To change his dad The Beast Darling Mani Sanchez Lagoon 22

Ding dang dang Doi Dobby China I enjoy Yes Evan Piling Flagslang chum Did you translate this? Because I don't want to say saying

No Isn't it that place name that's like really long? Yes Flagg slang Knops sopped Pulling Smedels Flaskolskkels

Kept back Tiffany Young Dobby China made me relaps back into my gooning addiction I can't get House elf pussy off of my brain

Fappin and clapping it's happening Lapping up some sap that's splatter on the mat And the substance is masculine Travis King Captain Clungehole Slit Stormay Bodmod

Dob mod Yeah I do declare That this is random Minion XD Grant Connor Jack Price Kalkie Cheaky little Lloyd

You know I always thought Normality was kind of ridiculous So I wrote a podcast about it And it goes a little something like this Sketch Screen My delo feligates, misa du declares a bursa. Are they cunt?

State of Alaska. Matthew Edge. World's biggest Kino Loy fan. Callum J. Crick. James is not my special lady, she's my freaking lady friend. Toesucker. Mr. Chip's beaten, bruised and sobbing, stands as a man gives him a silver platter, lifting the lid to reveal two yellow butt.

yellow butt. Ganges satellite. Every winter I drink lots of water and go on long walk so that I can warm my hands by holding them next to my piss stream. Tony O'Swelt. Sad Nietzsche shit. Dear Lord, what a sad little life, James.

Keep the 50. Buy some decorums as you're the greater reverse in Motto, Motto, about tires. Crashbunk. If you're listening to this, you just lost the game. Full Guy's official bean breeding farm. Salad 5-26 D-D-D-D-D drop the bear

One The Beltman Mr House Jardos and the Four Funny Your mission is to rescue All-Albino Capi Bows from the Swindan shankas Leafel 4thawrys

Howie it broadly Cryptkeeper The Bush Bush Imported guest Tom Barenack Gilbert the awesome one James's dad Nate's mini-figs

The Mosquito at KFC ordering a Big Mac My Gooch is a Scratch and sniff skin sticker. Enormous gratitude to James stole my cock and bulls for the parts he sells on his website.

Recorder enthusiast. Cobalt Rad. Drain my cock, Johnson. Chaser de Dragon. You look like an Amazon package, a box, wee bowling-looking ass. Get a strike with your bowling pin looking ass.

Michael from NZ. Literally fucking slices my cock down the middle. with a razor-thin wire. I'm going to kill Alex. This is not a joke. I'm going to fucking assassinate Alex. Tom Fudging Armstrong.

Piss drinkers unleashed. Stephen is human. Meekly. Conotada. Thomas Martin. Before I hand this iPad off to you, you should know that I let piss a dick use it. And now it's full of piss.

Swish. Swish. Quebec Films. Oura, Keck Flexington, Ben, fartbag, Gez, Fiddle me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, man, me, Reborn Freshling Danny G-based Lord Woodpecker from Mars Egy Airacker Yo mama so fat harass is procedurally generated

James Bab Hooper E-girl in a Bebo shirt has named herself Catherine James why won't you return my texts Creamer Sam Kellswell Adam Johnston Tom Bowie Zach

Super Crunches Lillian Lindsay Lawless Joel Stewart Egy Hacker When Blackbirds Fly 2016 Big Whoops Gremblow

Joe's BG Couta Panda Lucy Tires and Asian Randy Ruins Patreon The Pooh Man Beesmo Beastmo Beastmo Patreon name Katia fucking Managan

And last but not least David Bollais Thank you all ever so much Thanks Special shout out to Halself Bussie