JAR Media Posdact - Prepare for Paisley! - JARCAST Episode 175

Episode Date: July 15, 2019

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Good afternoon, morning, evening all night, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to this episode of the Jarm Media Podcast. That's no good. Do it again. Good afternoon, morning, evening, or night. Good afternoon. That's no good. Do it again. Good afternoon, morning, evening all night, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to this episode of the Jarmidia podcast. Today, we are joined by the complete Foresome that is... Brian. The Forsome.

Jamie, Ruben, Alex, and myself, James. This episode is 175% sponsored by Brian. James, I think, changed the number, hopefully. I did. That's very good, James. You make a great... Thank you to the Patrions over Patreon for supporting the show and making everything possible. We love them.

Thank you very much. We're going to need you to buy Jamie some razors to shave his head, though. I already have some. Where's your hat? I know This is wrong Where's Jim's hat Cancel it

This is over So how are we doing today Ladies and gentlemen Beside me There's only gentlemen here And we can't address the audience I'm afraid You can tell us how you

No I'm on about you guys Pretty bad Why are you doing bad Alex my homie Because I just got a puppy At the same time I have a cold Explain this puppy Because this puppy is a new

experience for us all and we are a player presenter or something that doesn't know what he's doing James just like periodically turns into a robot yeah that was him being a robot I do not

tell me about this puppy that's bringing new experiences for you all I don't think I've said the name of the puppy yet James speaks like anime dialogue badly translated badly translated anime dialogue then that's a good thing My dream is to be an initial re-character, and that's kind of like happening.

His drifting is bringing a new experience to me. Like a puppy and being ill. My father warned me of this. Basically... Yeah, and then they just mutter that out of no way. So Alex got a new dog. Yeah, surely I should talk about it. It's my fucking topic, yeah?

Yeah, talk about it then, yeah? So... I can't believe these idiots, can you? I got a puppy. I teased it on Twitter. People saw. I was going to have a... on this part of the cast

but she's so small that you actually can't see her yeah yeah she's actually on the end of Rubin's mind but anyway yeah she's a golden retriever and her name is her name is Paisley

it's not a male and she's not called fucking Angry Joe so you can stop with that no no stop you need to stop Angry Joe but it says Jio I don't want her first name to be fucking angry Just give it Just give it about 10 weeks Where the puppy phase is warmed up

And Alex is just gonna be giving it the stupidest nickname Yeah angry Joe That's what's gonna happen Yeah you don't understand The nickname thing To the extent that it has been Is so specific to Argy Yeah that's the thing

Argy is funny You can't preemptive strike a nickname Yeah The Argy's a funny creature Yeah calling and argue like angry Joe feels more right angry Joe and then he'll come running because he will yeah that's funny as fuck man because angry and argue sounds like the same to his little dog brain just adding Joe on the end is like he thinks he's been fed or something but yeah of course

when you first get a puppy they've never been away from their pack before so they'd like cry at night so I've been dealing with that since a Thursday and it's Sunday so I haven't had much sleep? Girlfriends do that as well. When you're locking in cages and shit. Bruh. Well, no. I don't, it shouldn't really affect your

No to which bit. Yeah, which bit? The girlfriend won. The woman's bit it can stay. That's fine. I want to vote your puppy. That's not correct.

Why would it affect your sleep? I was lying about my experience since Thursday. It's actually been great. What part do you question? I'm not questioning all of it. I'm just saying that why would you be awake? You literally just let them do their thing. You don't need to be awake.

You just sleep. Because it's a loud noise, like a loud high-fetched noise. Well, your thunder noises which aren't ASMR. Your wind noises, which aren't ASMR. Why, that would cover the noise. You can just listen to that. And you put some headphones. What's your question?

Nothing. Yeah. He's just attacking you. Yeah. Classic James. Yeah, but you need to hear her cry. I know you do. Because she might do a poo.

Yeah, of course, they're so small. Their bladder is so tiny. They can only stay in the cage for a maximum of about four hours. Well, that's the question, why is she in a cage? Because otherwise they... I can't just leave her. You know all this, James. Yeah, I can't leave her by herself.

What did you do with Gaius? You didn't have a cage? What did you do with him then when he was meant to be like, all right, calm down there, you little fucker, yeah? He was just downstairs on the bottom floor. We had a baby gate, dog gate, a popper dog gate, and he just did his own thing downstairs and slept. So, no need for cage. He had space. I know if you have a...

Yeah, yeah. I know people have a cage where they also have a gate It's two levels, two barriers And if you don't put them in the cage You can sometimes just put them in this like corridor And keep them there for the dogs being like Do you want to put him in his cage But he needs to be separated from people, put them there

No, it's good because dogs They appreciate having like this safe, calm space Once they learn to associate with that Like argue after a while Actually instantly He would always just calm down Because he knew that that's it Can't misbehave anymore

Did he ever elect to just sit in the cage It was open ever? Would he skill in it and sit there? No, yeah. Eventually, I did just have the cage just open and you need to sleep in it voluntarily. Until it just got to the point where it wasn't necessary anymore. But it has made it really good for whenever I take him to be groomed or anything. When they're done, they normally put them in a cage. And if they're not used to that kind of thing, they can freak out, like Max, my previous golden retriever.

He hated that stuff. And he never was trained to be, like, removed from anyone. So he had, like, the really annoying detachment thing. Where whenever, for one second, if you're gone, they just start crying and screaming. all going yeah really really annoying that's screaming isn't it but that that reminds me of course

max if you don't know was the previous gold retriever I had for about a year there is some good moments on the cast before yeah he was on the cast for a while and all of that story is in one of the old episodes I think we actually talk about it in the one called what was it it was like a cast member leaves or something

and the thumbnails a picture of Max just look for that one Probably be somewhere around, like, what, the 110s, 120? I'd say so, yeah. Yeah. But the weird part it was about getting Paisley is that her dad, her father, was called Max as well. So there's some sort of poetry, it rhymes.

But Max is also just a very popular dog name too. Yeah, yeah, but I like the poetry bit, not that bit. I like the part that it rhymes. And then, of course, the picture of the day I bought Matt. Max home. I took a picture this morning of Paisley and Argy and they were mirroring each other and it was like some kind of destiny stuff's going on right now.

Not really. Let's be real. Argy say to Paisley. I'm so dustin. I hate Alex's argue voice. I fucking hate it. What's wrong with it, bro? You do you do a voice so classic? No, but you know what I'm saying? It's a dog. He doesn't have a voice.

Until 10 weeks time. when you give her a voice no no no you will no i bet you know right now you're gonna give up pasey oh by the way the helicopter's on our end so don't worry if it's near you you're not about to be fucking annihilator by an airstrike so i mean we are they how awesome would that be if we just got that was the last dark cast i don't know you see it because the camera would be destroyed no it just misses the camera you know that bit and i'm just how would it be uploading i don't know someone would come and do it someone would find this location yeah it would be like the blow witch project yeah we have

on these clips. We've become like the new religion because they find all of old jobs. It would be like an Iron Man 3 where they destroy his penthouse. Oh yeah. That's so cool.

Nice cultural weapons. Iron Man 3 is actually quite good. No, it's not. It's the worst one. Iron Man 2 is. No. James is so wrong about everything. You've never even seen any of them.

I fell asleep during Iron Man 3 and that says a lot. No, Iron Man 3 is all right. Iron Man 2 is, yep. you go. Before we go too far down the Marvel Rabbit Hall, there are a couple of things

I've had noted down for a while that needs to be mentioned. We've got to do those noises, haven't we? Yeah, that was the first one. There's somebody who's making like a jar media game or something who was required and asked us if we could do grunting noises as if

you know, we're in a video game. We know the noises gaming is required. So no, let's do this in an organised way. to make it as easy as possible for them to edit. If we just go along the couch, Ruben, you start, and then it'll be me, then Jim, then James. So, Rubin?

I'll do a few, alright? Yeah, do a few. Ugh. Ow. Fuck, we can't laugh. Yeah, you can't go over it. That dirty is the noise for him. He's got to download.

He's going to have to download the whole fucking podcast to get that's the easy bit What other noises would there be? So do one like from Skyrim noise In Skyrim Yeah Yeah you're happy with that that selection Yeah, I think so I'll do a few then

It's a shame about the cold Oh everyone has to do the Skyrim noise Howe Ow What's the point? Why are they all pain noises? What about, like, is this a platform or what? Are they jumping?

Alice's law is that whenever he uses his powers, it hurts. What are the noises do you make in, like, the games like that? Yeah. Wow! That was nice! Oh, I really like that one! I'm something away from leveling up and you look like just the XP that I'm needing today. No, I'm thinking.

like grunts you know no no yeah more like that yeah yeah yeah yeah you know think about what david hated it to be snake jim music oh sorry for the people sorry for the people are just watching this I'm listening to this Oh Well, No boing I don't think I can do this

Um Really Well then Yeah Jim's the studious one who's like That settles that It's never a fight ends That's exactly how I thought it was to be

You happy with that selection? James, your turn. I don't know how to do this. Just do a... I don't know if I can do that. Anime noises. Ugh. Ah!

Ozzy. Ah! I thought of one I need to do. I thought of one I need to do. What's the Skyman you to do? It's like... Yeah, I'll do. Wow.

No, this one. This might be a problem. Oh, you sound like a character from fucking Octopastap. Traveler or Fan of Anci 12. If you do not go for Gap, you're no longer wasting you over. Then we think we're giving them enough? James is just going to do that for the rest of the... Hold on pod past.

Looking to protect yourself or deal some damage. Never should have come here. We all need to say that actually. James? Never should have come here. Reuben. Never should have come here. Never should have come here.

There we go. Are we done now? Weird. Mostly Skyrim. Yes. Got Scaram on the brain. What other sky in ones are there? I don't know, there are loads of scarring quotes. That'll be a whole pod cut. What's the best game quotes, though?

We already did it. No, what's the... Where it's so easy is definitely the best quote in any game. Where it's good. There you go. I think we should move on for the people that actually want to... Yeah. Actually, there was something bizarre that happened to me earlier.

That was foul. Sorry everyone for belching into the mic. I saw on Reddit some jarlings who... got together and recorded like a jar fan podcast. Yeah.

I saw this as well. It was called like dibby something but I listened to most of it I think. I can't remember. Was it cringe? Say yeah because it's a good thing apparently if it's cringe. No it was okay. I said it was bad. Oh you meant to say it

no. No but what was strange about it to me was like hearing people talk about say James for example but it was like that's my James that's not just a random James like on a random podcast why you phone to me is my James as if

well you're my James you're my James Alex is one of like exactly that's my point I don't have to like specify what Alex I mean but but that's my point though like that was crazy to me

to hear that I'm not gonna have like a kink for Alex saying my James great no he meant it like is in the way Frodo says Sam is his I call him a good boy. You're a good boy, James.

With big, big balls. Big swollen balls. Which one of you just did that? Yeah, I wanted to shout that out. I wish I knew what it was called. I forgot. I don't remember anymore. We'll find out on the next episode.

Is it called Wolfensine New Blood? Do the song for me. Angry Joe's mad. Angry Joe. Yeah, Angry Joe was mad. Yeah, that's it, isn't it? Angry Joe is kind of cute. Quirky.

Actually, recently, I appreciate angry Joe in a way I never have. Thanks to that video. Well, thanks to that video. We changed hearts and minds. Yeah, we did. And now we just need to do Jim Sterling. I have another topic as well. I have another topic.

This is one will keep us going for longer. It's one I've been meaning to do for a while. Of course, anyone who listens to the show on any podcast app or whatever, they can leave reviews. So I wanted to go through some of the reviews on iTunes that have been left for us. and see what you think I'm just sorry I'm gonna adjust my mic let's start with this one from why milk come from Pepe

or Pepe all right okay I'm gonna say what the fuck was that word the title of their review is Kabbal on Mars whether we wanted it or not we've stepped into a war with Kabbal on Mars so let's get to talking out their command one by one ballast or arc

from what I can gather he commands the siege dancers from an imperial land tank just outside of Rubicon he's well predicted but with the right team we can punch through those defenses take this beast out

and break their grip on freehold that was that review that was five stars they gave that one that was if ever you heard that that was when you knew the nightfall was going to be a fucking breed

every time that one got a five star from sooty 2002 Sooty. Okay, sooty. Great movie, five star. Originally I hated this orange juice, however, I found a quite delightful thing about cucumber

Nick. Turns out he is green, which was hard to find out on the audio version of this book, which would normally warrant instant one stars. However, this makes him like Killer Croc. Instant five stars. But he's not green, he's white because Alex got high and filled the jar of hair. James loves bringing that out. It's right in front of him whenever he's on the car.

to be fair. I don't understand what being high would make that seem funny. I mean, it's funny to me when I'm not high. It's not funny.

You ruined it. Does that still have the pickle in it at the bottom? Yes. It's not a pickle. It's a cucumber. I bet it's all absorbed.

It's absorbed into the hair, I bet as well. It's not. It's also got a scorpion in. Got a one-star review here from Traika Baker. Troika. Nope, Traika.

Okay. You can't even see it. Why are you trying to correct me? One star. beans was pretty good until these heretics went start spreading neo-Marxist postmodernist bean propaganda any more for the tank yeah a couple quick one here epic a k a george gave us a five star saying james is a pussy clat i love the cast however james is a pussy clatt that's their reviews they sit bumber clot

pussy clat James is a pussy clat okay yes what does that mean I need to go to Bristol to find out Jordan or James five star that's like the title of their review in the most recent Posdaq's long time jar member James has recently pulled a

shamamalia me on twist where he reveals his name to be Jordan in conclusion this podcast is well cringe oh James you'll like this one though they're all like really James focus for some reason five star title is just James that their review was just the best that was it okay I respect that yeah I'm okay let's do one more the best mother fricic dot dot dot from Alyamari this cast makes every

Monday worth living knowing that 6 p.m. I'll get to listen to an hour of goofs and gaffes from the jar lads. Thank you Jamie, Alex, Rubin and James Hart. Those were some nice ones. I was the first name brought up. I'd like to note that it was Jarge.

What are you talking about? Touche. Let me check if there are any other things on the rotary before we just move on to what we like. Rosary? You mean a votary? On the rotisserie? Yeah, I was going to say rotisserie makes more... I think we're actually pretty good. chicken. Well, Jim, you could read this one.

It was chicken. Wait, what? Read this one. The one where the flashy thing is. I don't take a picture of every bean I eat, do I? I don't take a picture of every bean I eat, do I? I swear you do. Whenever you make

bloody anything to do with beans, you send me a picture of it because I hate beans. Wait, but why do you get me to read that? It's just been written in the notes for a while. I bet you he was high when he wrote it in there No, I didn't. Why are you so rude? I'm not. And also I'm never not high, so everything I do.

Can we quickly talk about our star signs? My, my wee! What? I don't know my star sign. Where did that come from in here? Don't know, dude. What's our star signs? Yeah.

In our zodiacs, symbols. Yeah. Okay, I don't know, am I the scorpion? You're, you're, uh... You're giving me... Kind of Toro's voice. I'm gonna on Aries. I'd say Reuben is Taurus.

But I'm an Aries. No, but you're Taurus, though. But I'm an Aries. Actually, I think I might be Paiskis. I'm a psychotalius. I'm Kanker. No, Reuben, picture the Taurus demon. Brach!

From Dark Souls. Second boss in the game on the bridge. and now next to that in your head yourself is there not an odd like no

dude my fucking my fucking star sign is so real it literally is me James don't don't it says

they're meant to be easily relatable I'm not actually secretarious that's how they get you that's how they get you James it's meant to be easily relatable generic bullshit you can assign to us

vague as possible no it's bullshit oh no I'm a capricorn bro oh hey let me look at my what is a fucking capricorn

like a little elf thing no capricorn makes me think of like a bowl of cereal no like a corn dog like a tiny corn dog an elf holding a tiny corn dog a tiny corn dog

I'm looking at my zodiac personality why no one cares what zodiac sign you are i don't even know did we hand over to james oh yeah he wanted to say something then it turned out it was nothing so we can move on what are you saying someone what jim asked that subject i guess that was jim's subject i'm firing blanks over here somebody help me out um fire and beans over here i'm i'm a capricorn that's all i know anyone else got any uh any any any topics we should read our whole Horoscopes.

Sorry, I was just getting really paranoid that my bike got stolen, but it's fine. I don't think it did. You'd have to hear a lock go and then a gate go, and then your bike go. How? Where the hell was a key? So anyway. Where's my key? Well, I didn't think, did I have to get to a subject yet? I mean...

Yeah. I reckon we could fit another one in before the break, before we go to fans, fan bits. I don't know. I watched Spider-Man far from home. Yeah, Jim and I saw that the other day. Has anyone talked about it yet? No, no. Well, we can talk about it, I guess, for a few minutes.

I liked it quite a lot. Yeah, I enjoyed it a lot as well. I gave it a four on letterbox. Wow. I'm pretty sure you gave it a four as well. Yeah, I did. I liked it more than I did Homecoming. Four stars.

Yeah, four stars out of a possible five stars. Yeah. So I just assume everyone knows I'm talking about letterbox, but they have no way. They don't know that. I'm talking about letterbox. That's what I use. Oh, I'm getting a phone call.

No, it is very good. this movie had a lot a lot of pressure on it I reckon following end game yeah because end game was like the end hence the name end game and uh

sorry so this had to be the first Marvel movie post the end it's like they consider it the end of that phase yeah yeah I know but like it's quite a nice end cap all the characters

that people are attached to are gone pretty much Spoilers Bar Spider-Man Well everyone's seen End game Boing Boing Boing Byr

Spider-Man Right Yeah So then this movie Had to be like All right Here's just this one guy Because he's pretty much all

That's left now Yeah That only good one left Um Black Panther Hello Oh Oh both billion dollar movies

Hello I think they're gonna use Spider-Man as the next time I mean like they suggested it in the movie It's kind of what the whole movie was about Yeah But I mean Like

Not just in the movie But For the continuation Yeah post the boy of the series Yeah The thing is about him in the films He's just like a child still And Iron Man

No I know I mean like the character isn't The same But they're going to use Spider-Man To anchor everything around now he's young enough yeah probably lock him down into some like 20 movie contract because Tom Holland's already

old enough to look older than he does in the movies they could just do a time jump and be like oh look now he's as old as he is in the fucking spider man game high school's over now but they've also got the guardians they're the only other characters they've got yeah but they're in space

you're forgetting black panther you're forgetting Marvel woman Thor still exists even several that Like, where's Thor? He's not here? Yeah, but Thor isn't like a backbone. He's like a fucking shin.

He's a very solid shin. Actually, you can pick it in that shin's like, no problem. He's like your shin got destroyed and then you got a metal shin put. Hey, no, I watched Wagner last night and he was fantastic. Yeah, it's mediocre. But that's one out of three. Do you know why... Two out of two Spider-Man films have been good.

At least good anyway, you know. I think Homecoming's good. Mcoming is good. Yeah. I watched it recently. Far from home is better. I mean, two are the current mother phase. Of course, I'm aware of the other Spider-Man films.

I mean, there are now more, if we're going from Toby McGuire onwards, there are now more good Spider-Man films, and there are bad Spider-Man films. It's four to three now. Four to three. Does Endgame count as like a Spider-Man movie? No. Does Spider-Man 1 count as a Spider-Man movie? That one's debatable.

Does Spider-Man 2 count as a Spider-Man movie? We don't really count as a Spider-Man movie? No, because of Venom being so bad. What about the amazing Spider-Man? Where roughly do you put... Venom is the only Spider-Man movie. That's the end of it. Okay.

Where do you put this, this far from home, Spider-Man flick? What compared to the Marvel films? Yeah. Roughly. I know exactly where it is, because I have a list on Letterbox. Yeah, well, we're not all fucking dogs. Let me think of a film, the Marvel film that I like quite a lot. What's one of my favorite ones?

One of my favorites is The Winter Soldier. I don't know why I want so much I just do It's pretty cool It's just pretty cool That's what I thought That's cool I think it's better than end game

Yeah I liked I liked 5-Rum Quite a bit more than end game I mean I gave it a higher score Yeah It's not like As culturally important No

And I understand that Endgame had a lot You know It had to finish things Yeah Yeah Yeah And it's more exciting

It's just like A personal preference thing Yeah Yeah I just like Spider-Man a lot I wasn't sure about him to I was like he's fine But I was like I like Spider-Man now

He's the best one by far now Yeah Oh yeah How about you Where do I put it What is the one that's beneath it Yeah Endgame

Yeah Oh wow What's one that's above it You can think of one that comes directly above That's harder to think of though I'll have to tell you by looking at the list Because They're like 48 of these films now

I just can't remember list so I can know because I don't know what the fuck there is anymore oh James break the clapper board and the screw where's the screw then right that's another 140 pounds off the Patreon money then we're going to need you all to give even more money

Patreoners because James has broken the clapper I mean it was already not very good already broke but you know but uh are yearly okay I found my list don't worry oh that's good I have it below Guardians of the Galaxy

1? I was going to say I put it directly above Guardians of the Galaxy because John C. Reilly isn't in it. Guardians of the Galaxy 1 I tried watching somewhat recently could not get with it as much as I could the second one, for example. Yeah, because it's fucking trash. It's not. My current take is that, yeah, Spider-Man

Far from Home for me is better. I'd say it's definitely better than Guardians of the Galaxy 1. No, that's not true. Dung. Dong-dong. Dong-dong. Yeah, the cringiest bit in the movie. I'm with it, like at the start. Yeah. And then it loses me in towards the middle end. Yeah.

It loses me. It becomes complete trash. No, that's not true. The prison break, I'm like, yep, cool. I'm still with it. And then they just get to like that mining place and they just faf around. Fuck off, I'm bored now. Go do something else.

And we'll be back after these Marvel messages. Oh, doesn't that convenient? Marvelous. Hello, everyone. It's me, Alex. Almost got two million subscribers I do. Buy one of my jar media shirts. Available in the description below.

That was a funny message is, wasn't it, fellows? Yeah, sorry about the message on that one that took forever to be uploaded. I didn't have any of the usual things that must be there, like t-shirt ads or whatever, so I just had to use some footage from a thing. Oh, for God's sake. Oh, Jesus Christ. Well, I don't see you doing it, James. It's a lot of pressure.

This is the part of the show where we go on to... The rat breaks down. It gets real intense, no one, makes a sound. Everything looks like. It's eight mile now. I don't know he says after that. We go over to Reddit to answer some of your questions that you can leave on the Reddit that is JARMedia.

James should be a BBC presenter, dude. Yeah. What's up, guys? Blue Peter here. I just fucking beat a dude up. This is the one I prepared earlier. Just pulls out like a corpse. It's the night mother.

From Skyrim. Oh, wow. He's made it about Skyrim. Can we talk about Skyrim? No, no, we can't I'm going to answer a question now No, no, give him 15 seconds to try and describe what he wants to talk about You have 15 seconds from now

After this question Two, three No, no, no, after this question, if he has one, then he can If he still remembered it Yeah, listen, Sir Quintus has one for us Hello, Sir Quintus How are you doing today? If you all could have a song that played around

Around you when you're in danger Similar to games like Skyrim, Breath of the World, etc. What song would you choose? I have to play it on the piano. Yeah, Jim. Oh, that piano ditty. The, well, do we say... The theme song of an ex-friend.

An un-known hero. That unsung hero. Not a song hero. Nah, for real day this time. That's a tricky one. No, it's not. Because if you aren't so serious, you're a bit cringy. Come on.

James would have, like, running in the 90s. No, we'd be fucking wash and heart. face that's cringe you said i'm okay james having russian heart because james is in danger every time he gets in a fucking vehicle so let me look on spotify i know i have

my answer so i'll answer mine it depends what level of danger is like you're going to die in pavre or just danger full stop you're going to have a crazy battle because let's say you wanted like you're like oh man of steel it's like well you're not superman you can't do the things that that music is for no i think it's it's like they use sky in my breath of the world as examples where there is normally like a fight dangerous song so a reasonable

level of fight I'd have to look at Spotify as well I think no I've figured mine out well I have mine but I haven't had a chance to be able to say it well say it then there go on um the the lighthouse music from annihilation no that's horrible

yeah no my one's then I'll be like I'm just gonna run I'm so scared Okay. Mine is, uh... Trigonometry. Kung Fu fighting from Kung Fu Panda. See, I was just trying to...

I took a random stab, won't I want to see if I could preempt Jamie's, but I couldn't. No. No. I like that. It's a good decision. It'll be... It's like... That'd be a good one.

No, the one with Jack Black Singing Day. Because then you're going to... Rue, what it was? Because he's got so much, like... Do other people hear it, or is it just in your head? What? In this question? Oh, right.

Like, does it just play ambiently around you? Yes. Yeah, as you get further away from you here, as you get closer. It just behaves the same way it would if you were the character in the game. Yeah. No, that makes no... Because they wouldn't hear it because they're not... It plays in a field around you.

So it plays in a field around you then, if we're going to go by that logic. No, surely it should play in a field around the danger. yeah maybe yeah but then if it gets quieter when you're getting further away from danger it actually be really helpful because think about it in scowbrough of the world it just once you pass a certain threshold it's quite like fades out it does like a resolve to to end it so if we get in a car with james it's all four songs just playing over each other yeah no fuck it i just say trigonometry for mine boom bidabum woulda boombo da boombo da boo boo do we the fucking party verse

dude dude i'd have at the vengal boys uh we're going to ibiza we're going to that used to be on an album we had yeah like now fucking yeah it's one of that one now album we're surprised people still buy them now albums they still do them now like 170 you love listening to radio pop a very convenient way of listening to all the radio pop I suppose if you don't have a streaming service which everyone does. Who doesn't have a streaming service? Even my parents are

streaming services now. Mine don't. And James' parents still don't understand Inception. They don't understand many things. Damn. Damn, James. Biding. Bading. Or you could have Supermarine from Dunkirk. That would be quite an intense danger moment. What about the one

from Halo? I quite like that. Which one? Halo 2, the Halo 2 trailer music. Stage D.K. has one for us. Donkey Kong. What would each of you do if you woke up in James's body? Not funny.

Didn't laugh. I'd check my dong. Yeah. Look at Willie's Jerk off. You wouldn't be wet because you would just see you're not a cock. No, then I'd make my cock a wrecked. No, because if you're waking up, no. Morning bone.

Morning would, because you're waking up as him. Yeah. Chances are. there would be some morning work going on. I would make James's penis erect while in James. I'd be inside James making his penis and then jerk him off from the inside.

Yeah. Is that it? Is that what you do? Is James like there just having to watch like through the eyes? Yeah, like get out. Oh, that's horrible. He's in the sunken place and we're making him erect. No, stop jerking me off.

No. I guess in a weird way, that's kind of a form of like sexual assault yeah but come on is that it would have to be done no one would believe in there is that all you do is that all you do collectively if you had the control of me for a day

but I wouldn't want to do that thing that say for example Ryan Reynolds does to Jason Bateman in that fucking awful comedy switch up or some bullshit oh yeah I've seen that recently uh where Ryan Reynolds's like

oh I'm a lawyer now let's go be a douche and he's like I'm pretending to be a lawyer and he like ruins his life it's like you're just an asshole then man yeah so i'd just sit around and be like okay i'd eat loads of beans as james yeah i'd eat all the things james hates yeah i'd eat all the things james hates yeah

um and that'd be like eight pints at the pub i'd sit him up to be like have loads of diarrhea or something that's just really fucking horrible no you know what i do let's say i'm gonna leave his body right at like at midnight right i'd just make it so i was gonna be really hung over

okay no i don't do that that's just horrible you've just talked definitely really high so that when we did his body at midnight James has to do a being really hot for six hours or something that must be like breaking a law as well it's like drugging someone yeah and no one would believe in yeah it ain't breaking a law if it ain't real but James there is a second part of the question that's just for you yeah what would James do if you woke up in Taylor Swift's body would you go and get funked in the pussy no probably not. Why not?

What would I do if I woke up being incredibly rich? What would I do? Would you put your money? Just send some money to yourself. Yeah, get your like accountant to be like, I need to send just a bit. Not like a suspicious amount, just enough. So when she goes back to her body, she doesn't even think about it.

I suspect, don't you? Oh, my rich is still there, guy? Yep. I'd do a big fat poo as Taylor Swift. No, like, take a picture of her shitting and then, like, upload it to Instagram No, just That'd be pretty great

No, take a shit And then take a picture of the shit Start beef with all these artists Yeah And shit Slap back at Kanye When she wakes up She's just got all these people

They hate it now All her industry contacts No, because that's actually ruining her life Yeah, that's a bit too far Alex You would be Ryan Reynolds In that one movie

Yeah, but Alex isn't friends With Taylor Swift Yeah, that's the diff Oh, are they friends in that movie? Yeah, they're like best buds Oh He's so unlikable what a fucking twat

yeah he didn't actually switch bodies by Jason Bateman can you guess Jason Bateman's like conflict in that movie he's got to choose

whether it's a cheat on his wife or not because of course he's in Ryan Reynolds' body he's like oh now I can shag the the fucking woman at work

that I like so it's like the cobbler sort of yeah slightly less fact up than the cobbler there inside John Malkovich Holographic Feminist asks

Where did you lot go on work experience I'm on one this next couple weeks And it's very stressful Ah I went to my dad And got paid for it So I did it pretty good It was an easy week

It's alright But he self-employed to I'm not allowed to talk about what I did I remember I'm not either I didn't No. I did a couple though. Well, you're not allowed to talk about the one that I did that you also did.

Did you sign anything for that? Nope. So you can't talk about it. No, I'm just making it sound really cool. Yeah. No, it was cool, Jim, because there was like a car there that you said that I'd like. That was like the big interesting thing about your one. And it had bite green whims.

Oh, fuck it. Of course James remembers that. Well, my work experience, I didn't do any in year 10. and then in year 12 when you're meant to do it again or sick for him I just had a job at Sainsbury's anyway so I was like I don't care, not doing it, whatever

I didn't know what the fuck I wanted to do myself back then so you should have texted Kevin Spacey and been like can you get me some work experience I want to be the House of Cards I want to be the House of Cards I want to be it

Why is it called House of Cards when he actually just lives in the real White House because he's playing the game he's juggling you don't juggle when you build a house of cards yeah it's got a house of juggling balls out you didn't let me finish my metaphor I'm not going to now

your metaphor you're not finishing it because it was bullshit It was not funny It was supposed to be just really clever No it wasn't funny or clever I didn't laugh or have a brain blast It didn't blast James thought it was funny

Was that thing you want to say about Skyrim then James Yeah oh james next question lennie henry fan 69 favorite tv shows as children ideally looking for c bbc or c bbby's shows of course mine were things like raven and bamzuki oh raven no bamzuki remember that crazy shit i remember that crazy shit i don't everyone's bamzikis were awful because the program that used to like design their bamzook it was kind of like spore but even more... It was awful. I don't remember this. It was kind of like Spore

combined with robot wars, right? You could download it. Yeah, you could... It was like sport... Yeah, that's a good example, actually. Yeah. Yeah, you had to design these Bamzuki's to take on a series of challenges in like a

VR sort of set up. Sounds bullshit. Raven was fucking real. No, that shit was real life. It was like Game of Phones before Game of Phones. Yeah. Yeah. Raven, that was that one where they had like kids play this game in this like,

lopping sort of environment yeah but the raven guy he was so cool yeah he was cool but they were like death eaters as well yeah remember the one where you had to go around the room with all the strings and the bells and if you touched it yeah the creep the catcher or whatever just they did like special effects

when you lost yeah no do you remember like if you lose you have to do the like the way of the warrior yeah yeah it's called the way of the warrior yeah no one could do it pretty much maybe one kid would have done it at some point yeah it's they're bringing it back by the way. Yeah, I know. I'm going to go on it with the same guy again or something

it was. No way. Kearney Reeves is going to play Raven now. No, I've got to shout out the like monkey madness one. Do you remember monkey madness? Well, Jungle Run. Yeah, Jungle Run. That has just come to me from somewhere. Yeah, monkey madness. Jungle run was kind of freaky though. Jungle run, I thought... Yeah, the monkeys were scary.

I used to look at Jungle Run and be like this shit is way easier than Raven and yet they still lose. Yeah. Loads of those challenges were so... They had like a puzzle one. Yeah, I've done how puzzles work Raven was monkey madness for the cool kids Yeah, Jonga Run was CITV

Raven was BBC The NBC expected better Of its children There's only There's only one show That he watched as kids Which was the best And that was Takeshi's castle

I watched that as a kid What? I watched it I watched it when I was like a Yeah I didn't Not as a kid though I was in secondary school No

I've been on the Takeshi Castle train since the beginning That shit is bonkers Just in the whole Japanese shit. Explain what it is. It's kind of like... It's this weird Japanese game show where it's like there's this...

You have to take Takeshi's Castle and you do that by doing these like loads of really weird like challenges. I think most people know what it is. Yeah. It's incredible. Loved it. But are the actual kid shows?

I like Thomas A Tank Engine. There's a real like young kid-mead thing to like... I like that. I like the movie with Lady. Yeah. I like that one as well. I like going to... Diesel, the bad he tried.

train. I was scared of Diesel was a kid. Yeah. You're scary. Scary. I was. He was a punk. Wasn't that just the movie? That was just the movie, yeah. The TV show. The really bad fucking film. Yeah, like the classic Thomas Tank Engine thing was the... With Ringo. It was the good shit, yeah.

Hello, I'm Ringo. Ha ha ha. And SpongeBob was obviously the... Yeah, everyone was Spongeb. Everyone likes Spongeb. Can I just say that I think fairly odd parents was trash fucking awful fuck that shit what do you think about failure parents James

I did watch quite a bit I did watch it but it's because they do two SpongeBob two fellow parents yeah just have to persevere half an hour because it would be like oh these sponge was on after this yeah then I didn't watch any sugar puff girls Power puff girls

I didn't watch anything like that by the time I had Sky they sort of had stopped showing that kind of classic 90s shit right yeah I loved that I loved that I love that 2D clone wars show that was cool but it was like Tartorovsky did or whatever yeah that sure we're on that that was awesome yeah but fuck it whereas like I remember seeing general

grievous in it and being like whoa he's gonna be so cool in the movie and then he's like he's instantly and it's like thanks George nah you still loved it yeah I didn't even love it at the time but you know there's that thing that deep down where you're kind of like oh is that sort of it yeah yeah oh that's a shame you feel like you've got to like it Yeah, of course. Yeah, nice one, George. Ruined all of our lives here.

Look at us now. Look at what you've done. They didn't do anything to me since I didn't watch Stiles as a kid. Yeah, because you were too busy watching Raven. No, Dick Heshastry's Castle. I'm top gear. Yeah, point is, Jongerun was easy, and I don't know how they were all so bad at. Jungle Run.

Monkey Madness was kind of sick, though. all the the like scenery the water and trees and stuff remember 50 50 50 that was another one and it was like they'd have two schools come in and they'd say they'd had them all lined up from 50 50 50 and then they'd say they'd say the numbers that were going to compete in this next thing and look if i show you it i have no idea what you want about yeah was it a bbccc thing was it called 50 50 50 what about like baby shit did you watch tally tubbies or tweenies or any of that shit tell you shabby to always freak me out oh fuck yeah I remember this no I remember this 50 50

really shit the only 2000s are just the worst yeah I remember this this looks like fucking 80s shit how it into the mic room it so people can hit If I go back to the music, just for a minute. Alex, do the rap. No, you have to do it, Jim. You do it, Jim. No. Superstar family, you've been a new jacket.

No, no, Jim, you need to do it. Do it properly. Should I take it back to the start? Yeah, do it. When Jim does it. Superstar family. It just doesn't happen then. It doesn't happen then.

It doesn't happen. One Grammy, Superstar Family. Yeah, funny one gram, super star family, we do meet Jaggling, well, a little. It doesn't work. It doesn't work. It doesn't really do it the exact same way. No, it's not. James doesn't understand tempo at all. James doesn't understand music. No, but Jim says it the same way.

You don't change how you sing it. What are you talking about? It's a rap dog. How you sing it. Anyway, that's enough of that one. Let's move on. Okay, that was a bizarre game. I just, oh, okay.

McThick Wide. Oh, yeah. asks, James has once again forgotten to answer the question of what his favourite jazz albums are. You're going to have to give me more time. Oh, James. It's because it's complete horse shit. No, there's so many. I've had enough.

He doesn't have enough. You don't know it. You don't know it. You don't know it. You don't have any things. If you ask Jamie, what are your favorite prog rock albums? He would just answer with Pink Floyd albums. The Halo soundtrack.

Do, do, do, do. What do you have to say? yourself James I'll find it right now five four three superstar family

two I'm gonna have to move on James we can't sit here where you look from spot I'll come back don't we owly lady asks I'm moving in with my girlfriend next week

and we met through jar just kidding that'll be lame wondering if you had any tips slash stories cheat codes on moving in with someone long term at the moment I'm in a flat with some

friends but only about six months Thanks, Mingers, game on. Um, don't. What's the next question? Hot Girl Booty Spider-Man asked. Fuck it, Hot Girl Booty Spider-Man. Did Alex enjoy Celeste? Did you finish it?

Are you going to tell the truth, brother? Did you get stuck on a lot? It just can't be bothered or something. I did like one level legit And then I just turned all the cheat codes on And did it in like 30 minutes Boing Boing He's such a little bitch for achievements

It's actually pathetic I didn't know that I'm going to do it like that Because I can't bother to play Oh wow you're going to miss Completely miss the entire point of the game I understood that Wait hold up I knew I was never actually going to finish it legit

Are you being serious What you just What you just said you're being serious About what missed the point of the whole game yeah yeah so you agree he just said the thing he did the thing about it's like you didn't learn anything and yeah no but james always was on that other side like difficulty in video games yeah you should be on my side bro i was doing it in terms of i don't even know what my argument was when we talked about that anymore

someone remind me why you got secure no difficult it is yeah but that's actually bullshit by the way now that i finished secure like eight times have you done that i've finished it twice. And finished it once. Was bullshit, reel it back a sec? Like, every time a From Software game comes out, it's like, wow, they've made it even harder. And then there's the whole controversy. This one ain't even harder.

Here's my thing, right? If I was sat down with someone just sat there in the same room as me, we're doing some just couch gaming, I would probably have finished Akira by now. I can't have bothered, because I just can't bother to play games on my own. Most of the time, so I may as well just do something else. I actually love playing Games Unless it's something that is like Not really asking a great deal of me

In terms of challenge You see I'm the opposite I can't play something by myself That isn't challenging in any way And again I don't know Like if I'm gonna play like games Co-op then fucking whatever But like for it to keep me engaged

It actually is to require something of me I just kind of both play secure I don't know what it is Yeah because you're not a real gamer There's one real gamer in this room There's me because I played the most games No, there's only two real gamers Because real gamers are number one on the lead award

Which Ruben and Alex have never done Me and Jim only will be in the fucking foot Were you number one? Were you number one for before a hacker ruined it or something So James is gatekeeping what games value Are you more than others He doesn't count my Rayman skills No yeah that's true

Alex's Rayman I do count my Alex's Rayman skills calculated he had to do one thing every fucking day or week for like two years to get this one achievement. It was literally like a year. I did it every day for a year. I've calculated that to get every achievement in Jewelingo, I have

to do something. I have to do it every week. I have to actually do the adjoining it every week. That's what's required. Let's just be doing it every day. I do it every day. Good. Good. Get on that grind week and do it every day. I missed on Friday because I... You missed one. The largest

street... I was busy on Friday. The largest one I lost was like a 260 day street glossed. Mine is not 260 days. Nobody gives a shit in the audience. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. If you want to learn a new language.

What we even talking about? It's what I'm going to be duolingo street. 242 day streak. Oh, gamer cred, that was it. Yeah, which I win. No, you don't. I win. No, game of credit, I win. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. No, you don't. Yeah, I do. I do. I do, I'm sorry. How did you? I win? Come on, explain.

Gatekeeper. Yeah, gatekeeper. No, how does that make me a gatekeeper? You guys, you guys are. saying you're the best true gamer it's not about game like okay why let's do a vote then why don't we do a vote he's the most true gamer yeah yeah i don't consider myself a gamer so i'm not involved that's bullshit yeah that's how am i a gamer we're all fucking okay everyone is james is the truest gamer hands up for yes just do it because he doesn't

want to be it there you go hey james is the gamer of jar here we go how am i the game who are you voting for my vote was going to be for jim who is Who actually plays the most games of all of us here? Who plays the most games? The height of the greatest. No, no, just the amount. How much do you play games? I think it's probably still me.

I don't play games ever, ever. I don't touch games. It's not true. That's just not true. I probably put the most hours on games. That's not Game of Cread. Game of Cread is being the best at first-person shooters, and that's me. No.

I'm the king of the first person. Game of Cres is like what Reditors love. The Witties. This is Variation You know I've got a great Whatever times

Rated Nintendo games I just haven't Fucking finish Sekiro Yeah But only the good ones Where for the

World Yeah man Who here Who here Well Who here Who here? Who is here?

I can't remember The name of the game But I played it And you guys haven't So What game Indie game Papers please

Yeah I knew it was gonna be that That's Jim's one Indie game I played I played gone home home and it wasn't very good. I played Firewatch and it wasn't very good.

I played her life is strange. Fuck that game. I played the first episode of Life is Strange and it was so fucking bad. It was the most embarrassing shit. It was so funny. So Game of Cread is what you get out of it. There you go. Game of Cread is I don't even try to get variation with games

because I'm just like, I'm feeling this at the time. That's what I'm doing. Yeah. The one I try to be more varied with is movies. I try and watch more variation. My varied, I try to be more varied with the music I listen to. I tried that I challenge myself. Yeah, I'd say I'm music, not games, I'm music. I have a very varied music taste and that's what I try to do.

Okay. I just think... So I do win. No, Jim doesn't get game across. Okay, let's do a vote then. Yeah, let's do the real vote this time. Okay, then. Are you allowed to vote for yourself?

No. Yes. What? Okay, no, you may as well say yeah, because I was going to vote for myself. Okay, Rubin. Well, who works for me? Yeah. I vote for me.

Okay, that's one vote for Rubin. Me? No, one vote for me. No, actually, no, wait. Alex used to get every achievement in every game for a long time. That's kind of hell of a game of. Alex is the truest gamer. I hunt that meta game, dude.

I've ascended to the next level. Just for Assassin's Crew Brotherhood, Alex is a trueest gamer. Just for doing that, because that seems like the worst one. Can you, no, can you... I don't know if that is GamerCred, though. Alex did Geese of War, 100%, that's Game of 100%. That's Game of Red. No, that's kind of like a problem.

No, because I'm playing about the same amount of time, but I'm just using my time differently. Not with Gears of War II and Gears 3, come on. No, you played Brotherhood more than me. You played Assassin's Creed 2 more than me. Yeah, but that doesn't mean I played games more than you. You just, when you finished a game, you just moved on. I didn't. I just stayed on one until I completed it.

How many hours did you put into Destiny? How many else did you put into, like, World of Tanks and all of those fucking age? Quite a lot. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. But you put more hours into gaming than me. I don't know if that's fair What about Mourable Fair too? No, I'm considering that

But my game dropped I've got to think about like now I think in the last two years I've put a ridiculous amount of hours into games I've barely put any I just have like nothing to do most of the time Okay besides Apex explosions Yeah so there is one like every year at least

Yeah When was the what was the one last year? This has never been the point For he's now You know So Jim has way more tolerance for like doing the soul's bullshit than I do. In terms of variation, different genres, I think I have you guys trumped. Nope. Disagree. I still think that we're either equal. I don't

play games, so I'm not going to say. I don't think, let me think what I've like, well, yeah, I think I still have the same level of interest in bullshit indie games. Not bullshit any games, that's mean, but indie games. I was just thinking about fireworks and how much I don't like it yeah it's all right did you play that yeah yeah you just watch a play with it and you get the game just a huge leg down that's it that's the whole game an anti-climax it's like a fart that you expect to be delicious but it isn't it's just a fart you haven't actually played jj abrams they're only good at building intrigue that game where you yeah there's a dot yeah that game anyway fuck yeah the puzzle game made by an actor at this guy who was like

did it always an experiment or some shit what's that called I'm totally lost now to be honest I tried that yeah got bored

some reason it's making me think I don't I can see it but I don't what does it call and then you start seeing them in the world and then you combine them

and then when you stop playing you see it yeah the witness that's because I watched Joseph Anderson's video and I was like yeah yeah that's why I watched

yeah I had it I didn't play it and then I don't know how I played it I just think it's a bit And then I didn't want to finish it or anything. I didn't buy it, so I don't know how I played it, played it. It was on Games of Gold a while ago.

Yeah, and I watched this video, and I didn't want to play the winners. But we've just sort of like meanded into nothing in the last few minutes here. We're about to be the anti-climax. Let's quickly be funny. Go on ask one funny question. Oh, really? You're going to regret this. Minecraft Mass Effect in Halo, one has to go,

which will it be? It's from Gerns Mo 7. Halo. Mass Effect. Mass Effect. Halo. There's better Mass Effect games

than there is Halo games. There are three good MassFet games. There are like five good Halo games. I would prioritize Halo of MassFect too. Yeah, definitely. I got way more time and fun out of Halo than Mass Effect. I love Mass Effect. No, but I think of MassFect as a better experience.

You really want to be robbing Halo 1, 2 and 3 from people? Yeah, you want to get rid of Col 1, 2, and 3. Nobody nowadays is... I like how nobody said Minecraft. Because Minecraft's fucking awesome. It's like too important. Yeah, Minecraft and Halo are more important than Mass Effect. Yeah.

No, but I like Mass Effect more than like Halo. So, yeah, but that's not the point. That's not the point. You're not seeing the bigger picture. This is why I'm the best gamer. Get out of here, gatekeeper. I played Final Fantasy 13 more than Jim. I'm the truest gamer.

That me, that, you lose gamer cred for that game. Gamer cred. Oh, thanks for listening, everybody. and supporting the show Gamer Cread We love you And we hope you have a lovely week I don't actually love you

Good and you're positive Ask questions about gamer cred Next episode We're gonna come back We're gonna come back with a conclusive list Of who has the most gamer cred We're gonna work out a way of measuring it Yeah

A quantifiable I don't think it's possible But I don't know No we'll do it We're geniuses We're all so kind of cute James don't tell lies Ow

Ow