JAR Media Posdact - Reddit Monkey Strenk - Corncast 31
Episode Date: March 1, 2021https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/jar-media-store Twitter: https://twitter.com/FourFunnies Timecodes: 00:00 Intro 03:18 Comment Barrel 06:35 JAR once again Rule Redd...it 13:29 The Eternals Are Finally Revealed 19:04 Anthem is Done 26:44 Halo Infinite Hope 35:20 Mid Break & Patron Names 43:48 Reddit Questions 44:02 Daft Punk Broke Up 50:57 Shaving Area 54:07 Secret Project 55:42 Fly on the wall for a historic event 1:01:46 How would you stop brian from dying? 1:03:13 Monkey Arm Tunnels 1:06:55 Ruben Underdog 2021 1:07:13 Mother Cartoons + James Part 2 1:10:13 Hoovering the air 1:15:44 What does PD look like? 1:18:40 Blame Game Marty Lore
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Good afternoon, morning, evening or night, ladies and gentlemen.
Welcome to episodes.
31 of the Jarm Media Concast.
Today we are joined by the entire gang.
We are all here.
We are all present.
And I hope you've had a good week and future week.
And hello.
Say hello, boys.
Dingle.
Did you tell me about that song
that was made by Kanye West and Jay-Z,
the one where they're in the French capital.
What was it called?
No, I'm not falling for that one again.
You, who, don't you mean,
what do you mean, fell for it, or fall for it?
Sorry, you dived right, like,
at the opportunity last time I said it.
You were like,
I was like, what's that song called?
You know, Jim didn't say anything.
You just made.
We were both listening to Watch the Throne,
and you specifically said,
what's the third track
in Watch the Throne
and James just guessed
and said it
She said it
Yeah
They didn't even know
It was the third track
No I didn't
But you know
It's not offensive
It's okay
Well no really
Is there any
Is it actually problematic
To say the name of that song
Because it's a
It's actually a name of a song
Like is that
You could just say N word in Paris
N words in Paris
You just say that
I don't know it's fine
I always just say wiggards
in Paris personally
that's me
That's not the name of the song
That's a different song
That's a different song
That's Wigs in Paris
We're talking about a different song
Yeah
How long until we get past that point
Wasn't it in the first like five minutes
It's best to not swear too much
In YouTube videos
Oh yeah
No what I do is I just clip the swears
And then reverse the audio
That tends to get past the scanning thing
On YouTube
Yeah
The great YouTube scam complex
As I like to call it
Scam complex.
No, it's probably just a bit confusing to those listening and they just hear,
yeah, bleh every now and again.
Well, I'm not, I'm, well, to be honest, out of all the jarlings or jar members,
I swear the least, I'm like pretty good of myself.
Is that true?
No, it's not true.
I never swear.
I don't know what James is.
Um, I think it's time to scrape into the bottom of the comment barrel.
How do you guys do about that?
I really don't like that this is stuck around.
I didn't mean for this to happen.
It's just words of consequences, you know.
You can't just throw out a concept like that.
We're going to have to fucking, like, put a trademark on it or some shit.
Did you see on the Reddit, someone put like a picture of, um, like a pistol, like, uh, head on, staring down the barrel.
And they were like, yeah, when you're looking down the, you're coming a barrel.
Um, before we get too deep, let me just shout out the patrons over at the Jiam Media Patreon.
Um, we did a little vote to see where the patron section should be moved to if at all.
The vote said to keep it in the middle, so we'll keep it there for now.
Um, leave your feedback though if you have any thoughts on that.
Casino Productions is going to start off the comment barrel.
Um, and it goes a little something like this.
Ha ha ha, you know, ha.
he he ha ha ha um so what they're referencing here is
i'm sure you guys didn't pick this up but in the last
episode as i was going through it i kind of spliced in
ha ha clips of ray william johnson from
that you know the stereotype song has like an opening and an outro where he's kind of
talking to the audience yeah you know stereotypes of i've always found stereotypes to be
kind of amazing
Yeah
Here's a little song I wrote about
Yeah
So I kind of snuck in the clip
So I could put
A Feet Puff Puff in the title
So it's kind of like an interview
But I hope people enjoyed that
Yeah
Pastor Jim regarding the
Patron segment
Says an idea for the patron segment
Perhaps you guys can record the segment
After the cast
Then insert it in the middle
Through editing
It's to not ruin the flow
of the cast as you were recording
not sure if this will require too much editing
but it's just an idea
you know what Pastor Jim
we're way ahead of you
we started doing that
weeks ago but instead of recording it after
we record it first it's the first thing
we record and then put it in the middle
it cleanses the palette
plat plat plat plat
or for the cast
and it's like a vocal warm-up too
you're just saying words
Leo Kirby has a question for you James
following on from last week
Can James Express his opinion on undertale?
Undertail?
Undertail.
What's your opinion on Undertale?
Well, I've not really played it.
It was FNAF last time, right?
I think, yeah, it was FNAF.
What do you mean you've not really played it?
I've not played any undertale at all.
I've not, I've only really listened to the soundtrack, and I've just seen stuff of it, but I've never played it myself.
I have, I respect it, and I always will.
I guess that's, that's the most I can really say about it.
Yeah, it's one I've always, like, been,
meaning to play but I just never got around to it. Daryl Barnett can round off this segment.
This is regarding the bathroom scales question or topic that briefly came up in the last
episode where we mentioned that there was a bathroom scales that could measure bone density.
So they said bathroom scales send a very small electric current through your body since
bones, fat, muscle, and other tissue
all conduct electricity at a different rate.
The scale can then calculate your bone
mass. So that's how they
do it. That's like a mentor.
I want to get myself one of those.
Turns out it's not just a couple of spikes
that you stick into your feet.
It has to touch it to measure it
sort of thing.
Well, yeah. Okay, I'm glad we're done with the barrel.
It's quite an intense segment.
I've got to admit.
Just changing the name.
just ups the ante
but um
we're getting some proper
time
we have some important topics this week
um
I just remember one too
that I didn't know down
Jim you'll know about this
yeah
how does it feel to be a
a Reddit king
Jim
fuck yeah
um
I do feel more complete
wait wait wait wait wait
do you feel vindicated
change the way
you need to say edit
alright
you just start the sense of edit
I actually don't know enough
Reddit lingo to
do a little bit
okay say edit and then just say something about Reddit gold
and then
edit
funny Reddit gold
ugly face
so yeah
for people that
don't know
I've been
fucking ripped off
some dude is profiting
mega Reddit gold off of my funny joke
my funny tweet.
It's my screenshot.
No, it isn't?
No, look at the screenshot.
It's from the perspective of me.
Oh, no, it is from the perspective of you.
Sorry.
No, but sorry, the context here is that
a picture of Jim's
eye message that we tweeted
on JAR Media's Twitter like years ago.
No, I'm pretty sure I tweeted it on my Twitter
because people have retweeted it since,
yeah, people have retweeted it since.
it's blown up on
on Reddit
Oh I assumed I just posted it
on the JAR Media Twitter
But yeah
That probably makes more sense
If it is your screenshot
But yeah
Three days ago
On R slash sad cringe
Um
The captioned damn
With a sad emoji
Um
User Hayd Z 66
Yeah just to re-uploaded
That very screenshot from your Twitter
And it got 13,000 up votes
And got on the front
page of Reddit so yeah jars sneaking in there into the front page of Reddit yet again you know
you got James sneaking into the yogs somehow yeah it's always in the back end just sneaking in
there and the the comments are absolutely bizarre too because they're all like from people who don't
know like the context at all so like the top comment is can we just appreciate for a second that he
Apologized. That's in reference to the actual post was it's like a picture of me smoking a cigar
Um pulling this like bizarre face you look like Gordon Ramsey
Yeah, I look like Gordon Ramsey with the remarked the same problem question mark and then you said many problems
Jesus no offense bro, but you look fucking awful
And then I just replied I was sorry about that bro
Yeah, someone in the Reddit comments was claiming to be me.
Yeah.
Yeah, I saw that.
Pathetic.
Which is really cringy.
And they got some, like, Reddit, like, rewards.
Someone gave them a reward, like, um, like the seal or whatever the fuck.
I don't know how it works or what the point of that is, but.
It's just fucking cringy as fuck.
Actually, going out of your way to, like, get clout from someone else's fucking image on Twitter.
Like, fuck off.
yeah um how do you guys feel about this i mean i don't like it i'm furious this reddit gold
should be lining my pockets and maybe a bit of a bit of your pockets as well alex for in the
picture yeah you guys deserve those reddish circles no listen to this the the post the original
post on sad cringe has a helpful award a wholesome award a silver award and six hugs award
They should be your hugs and helpful rewards.
Slash and sad cringe rules.
Number one, posts must be sad and cringe.
I mean, this is the thing.
It should be taken down.
People were accusing the, like, that it was fake.
People were saying the image is fake.
Like, it was made to go on Reddit on third cringe.
which is just a fake you're a fake
yeah the way we talk to each other
to most people it just like isn't real
but
no it's it's bullshit this person is
a stolen an innocent funny
like both sides
I believe in this interaction
were having a laugh you know you
you took the picture knowing that you look
fucking weird
really fucking weird and I just addressed a
that you looked fucked up in it and it was a little joke between the two of us so I'm
afraid it doesn't not belong on on sad cringe no it doesn't yeah I'm with you but
I don't know it's a huge subreddit 931,000 members well then they need
better mods I'm afraid damn okay well um in other news I'm about to post an article
I'm just going to say so
I'm just going to say so
what is sad cringe though
Sad cringe is stealing
another picture to post on the
sad cringe Reddit to get clout
that is sad cringe
Yeah welcome to Reddit
That's a good point
Maybe the fact that they had to like steal
A laugh between two people
To then be interpreted as sad cringe
To go on said cringe
That makes it sad cringe
That's all of social media though
Like on Twitter
The equivalent is people who
just steal tweets
and then they get like hundreds of thousands
of likes
or whatever it is
yeah it's all just like regurgitating
cycles
it just makes me wonder
like how many images must be out there
that you just don't know
like what they're being used for
and how it's being shared
and how without any context
like it is weird to see people
interpreting it without
knowing who we are
because that's how it was probably intended to be seen
was just it was on your Twitter
you know you have to know who you are
but that makes it extra weird
because it must have been
what three years ago
that I took that screenshot and put it on Twitter
so either someone just
had that image saved on their phone
for like three years
or PC or whatever
and then like just happened
to come across it and couldn't remember where it came
from or they went
back through my Twitter three years
and saved it.
Yeah, either way.
Bit of a meme.
Bit of a sad cringe.
But speaking of sad cringe, actually,
let me post this article in the Discord
I need you guys to open,
and I hope you haven't seen this yet
because I want your genuine reactions.
I'll just post the article.
So this is Wow News today.
photo full costumes revealed for Marvel's Eternals I was actually just looking at it on our subreddit and I thought this is a joke this is a joke it's not a joke so yeah I guess some intern had to Photoshop that together yeah an image of the superheroes of Marvel's upcoming film Eternals has surfaced online so I guess it's like promo art but it is the most bizarre promo art I have seen
it looks like a combination of
what actually reminds me of the most
is on deviant art people would make these like
fan edits
it looks like a fan edit
like on deviant art like all the faces
are like just a bit off
they're like not lined up to the bodies properly
it's the worst as the kid in the corner
that's I was going to say the woman on the bottom right
on the right she looks like her face
has just been taken off of it look at the one on the left
the little one on the
on the left.
Yeah, the kid.
Yeah, yeah.
I had to, when I first saw it, I was like,
this looks such, like, such a deviant art,
like, graphic design is my hobby type of it.
But then I realized it's actually fucking will.
It's a joke.
That's just terrible.
Honestly, the best looking one is,
come on and journey.
Yeah, I was going to say that for sure.
But there's this, there's this Twitter account.
um i've seen a few times recently called like a terribly made like fake movie posters yeah yeah i've seen
it and it looks like that that they've just photoshopped all these actors but
don't you find this kind of offensive like they've clearly got this really broad um broadly
diverse cast but who do they stick right in the middle white man that's not i thought yeah normal white
Game of Thrones, yeah.
It's so fucking typical.
I thought Angelina Joe Lee was in the movie too.
I would just thought they'd sell it on her back.
She's not pictured.
I was, yeah, I didn't even know she was in it.
Saw in the article, it just said she's not pictured.
I don't even know who her character is.
I just figure without Angelina Joe Lee,
who is the main draw from this cast here?
Kamal, obviously.
He should have been in the middle.
he's been big news
with getting ripped and everything
and he's like the only one of these actors
that I know unless that's
I recognize the
the top left
guy
this whole idea and like looking
at the original comics
I like doing that whenever Marvel
tries to release their new cool
hot IP
and then I just go and like Google the original comics
and just see how fucking lame
like all the original stuff is um yeah this is one i'm really gonna have to wait and see how they're
gonna like try and adapt this into something that works but i just have this weird green
lantern vibe off it with the way their suits are kind of like yeah i don't know they don't
look like they're wearing clothes it looks like cg and manny kind of i don't know it's all
like promo art so it's hard to tell but how many characters one two three four four
5, 6, 7, 8, 9.
That's more characters
than in the first Avengers movie, and each
one of those characters had their own movies.
And they're all immortal, too.
They're a race of immortal beings.
Jesus.
So the film is just going to be boring as fuck.
Can I mention
how it's a 16-month
calendar for 2022?
How does that make sense?
Is that what this image is from?
Look at the bottom right at the image.
A 16-month 2020 calendar.
Are we getting a few extra months next year?
That's the thing that people do.
They give you a few extra months just, you know,
to like work out getting a new one in some calendars.
Usually like the cheapest, shittest ones will do that.
For the more careful people.
There probably are 16 Eternals.
I don't fucking know how many Eternals are.
It's probably just a number of them.
They just keep adding them
They never die
So I guess it is the equivalent
Of the Green Lantern core
Yeah I get
It must be
Sounds fucking lame though
What do they do
What do the Eternals do
There'll just be like loads of
Captain Marbles
Just flying around lasering shit
Just boring ass fucking
Oh yeah
I saw that earlier as well
That meme of
Hideo Kijima
Just talking about films he's seeing
You know, he talks
In his little, you know, in a little tweet
He'll talk quite passionately about some
Some things he liked
And then for Captain Marvel was just
Saw Captain Marvel for stop
I didn't say it was bad
But
In other news
I wanted to bring this up
Because
I think it's lull
So Anthem is dead
They killed Anthem
Yay!
Which is...
What a waste of fucking time
that entire project was.
Holy shit.
A waste of time and money.
And like,
going back to that original anthem
like reveal trailer
and like to do the comments.
It's gonna kill destiny this one.
Destiny doesn't even want to die.
Destiny is just like...
Like, you know, there's...
I can't think what it is.
I think there's some...
You know, like the idea of the warrior
who just wants to be killed already.
It's just kill me.
But no one can beat it.
It's just desperate to be killed, but no one can do it.
Ebony Warrior from Skyrim.
Fuck you.
Anton wasn't level 81 yet.
He just couldn't do it.
He needed to be level 81.
Did you ever try it?
Yes, I tried the baby.
Yeah, that's the reason I didn't buy the game.
Yeah, I thought it was shit.
It really sucked.
I don't know why.
The thing you need for a live service that's going to be, like,
if you're designing a game to be like Destiny,
so at release, contentless, waste of money, blah, blah, blah,
it has to have good gameplay at the core.
So EA was like, right, we need to copy Destiny.
Let's get BioWare.
Let's get the guys who've never made, like, stellar gameplay.
Can you imagine that?
like the conversation where they go to the head of bioware and like you're going to make this
and he's just like they're just like i said he but you know they i don't know who they are they
can just what
it's like when they just got visceral what did they have they had visceral working on some
bullshit that they would never want to work on yeah battlefield uh yeah they just closed them
this is the cycle of EA studios they get the studio they make something awesome and original
and then they dilute that awesome and original thing
until it's just totally fucked
so Dead Space 1 awesome
Dead Space 2 awesome
Dead Space 3 piece of shit third person
shoo crap
Mass Effect 1
Like good game
Mass Effect 2
Masterpiece Mass Effect 3
Good game
Mass Effect Entromeda
Just fucking bullshit third person embarrassing
And then Anthem
But they started fucking with Mass Effect
with MassFet 2
and the Cerberus Network
and the 3
Yeah, yeah
But their tendrils
get like deeper and deeper
Yeah, yeah
And then after all that
Once it starts to look like it's not
financially viable like it used to be
They just assign that studio
To something that they would never fucking make
And then once that game
obviously doesn't do well
Underperforms financially, whatever
They just kill them
It's okay, well the studio's dead
So
Well yeah, imagine
shit at the fool from grace by away i've had from the mass effect trilogy in dragon age to then
anthem and mass effect andromeda i mean i do think it's a little bit excessive like the fool
from grace if i've had considering like mass effect three you know bad ending but the game is
like solid and people still like it blah blah blah especially with the citadar thing and then
dragon age inquisition like dragon age fans like that i think i'm not actually sure i never could
get into it i didn't i really just don't like dragon age but i don't think it was awful it just
don't like it um and then you know they do make they make one bad game and yeah it is really
bad but too bad what was the other one what anthem anthem and oh of course of course yeah well
but the thing about it is obviously like we know anyone who's you know you do a bit of reading
you know that the main team had been assigned to anthem and they were just like we don't want
to make this and then they had like the c team making andromeda who were just like we literally
don't know how to make this
it's just great
great job EA
at that time as well
EA was forcing every dev to use
Frostbite
that's right
did you see
um EA came out and they were like
they made a statement
they were planning to have
the next Dragon Age be like an online
a destiny game
and they only reeled it back
because of Anthem
fucking morons
these studios need to realize
like destiny occupies the space destiny has has muscled in and now it owns it you can't beat it
you just can't i mean like there again like there are like there are other life service
activism wanted to get out of business with them they weren't happy with the relationship
but also what the fuck is the point from what i understand dragon age inquisition did well
yeah it profited so they have an audience there so why change that to something they
obviously don't want. Because the recurring
spending. Yeah.
It's that recurrent
user spending? Yeah, recurrent user spending.
Then you risk it just being Anthem though. Then you get no
profit.
It makes... Yeah, the Ubisoft way makes
more sense. Like, I don't really like
it either, but at least they're
making single player games and yeah, they have
stores and shit, but it's not
ruining the integrity of the
basic foundational level of what the thing is.
Yeah, the difference with Ubisoft is that their games were actually never good.
Yeah, Ubisoft suck.
Yeah, so who...
Well, actually, I suppose it was quite a big community when Anthem was, like, coming up, and people were talking about it,
and they were talking about, like, the lute game, and, yeah, we're actually listening.
And I think it was with...
I can't remember if it was with Anthem or Avengers.
I think it was an anthem, actually, where the dev team were not allowed to talk.
about destiny or like contrast or compare to destiny in any direct way like so i don't know how they
could even like broach making the game if they if they didn't even want to try to compare themselves
to the contemporaries which they were aping it just it just makes no sense but i was actually
shocked when they announced that they were going to try and fix it i just yeah it was too it's
too deeply fucked
because as you said the gameplay loop
was really bad
everyone who's played destiny
everyone says the same thing
we're like the shooting on a fundamental level
feels good
you know
and
well yeah that's like the major difference
because
Bungy made Halo
the like the franchise
the revolutionized
console shooters
BioWare made a game that revolutionized
Western RPGs not
not games where it feels really good to just mindlessly kill shit.
I feel sorry for By-Ware in that regard.
Yeah, they've been fucked. Totally fucked by year.
You just don't seem to understand how to manage any of their assets, any of their IPs.
It's no idea what they're doing.
From what I understand as well, they had the a bit of the cyberpunk problem.
Where when during development, they basically just kept saying,
we made the MassFit trilogy.
we can't fail
right yeah
so that's why andromeda and
I mean not the only reason
but it doesn't help
one of the many reasons yeah
in um
slightly better news
um
there was a little bit of
halo infinite
stuff dropped the other day
um she wouldn't mind
ending this
first segment talking about
did you guys see this
yeah
let me just send you this
this picture because obviously I
I'd seen the screenshots, but when you see a direct comparison, like...
So the picture you just sent it at demo reveal, then six months later.
Yeah, it's, despite not showing any video, any, anything of the game, actually in motion,
I am much more pleased by what I'm seeing from these screenshots and the things they're saying,
describing it as a sandbox game, first and foremost, and showing, like, the environments and how the day-night cycle will,
affect it I just always feel like that's such it's such a like obvious idea to get as much
usage out of an environment as possible because like a more real yeah and like if you're
playing multiplayer maps on like maps that have like day night cycles if you're like replaying
an environment over and over again it feels different each time and if they like I don't know how
deep they're going with like in the dark do you have to use like a flash flash that would be
A flashlight, sorry.
I'd like that.
That'd be like Halo 1 again.
Fuck your way through it.
Yeah, so you need to use your flashlight.
There's definitely a lot of potential.
And yeah, the look of the game...
Yeah, I like how it's the thing we've been saying.
Like, it's the first time 3-4-3 with one of the Halo projects seemed to be doing something like ambitious and that hadn't actually been done before in the franchise.
Like, yeah.
They may just say kind of standard campaigns for 4 and 5 that there's nothing really crazy in there.
whereas here we've we've all said it for so long like an open world halo ring you can explore
you know if properly if implemented the right way and it not just being destiny could be super fun
because that that is still my big fear that like they've gone to the effort making this huge map
but the way if you interact with it if it is just a straight line kill and a bunch of enemies that spawns
and then follow the line again type design of like those MMO lights yeah that would be really
disappointing because there's so much potential for like story stuff and I don't think so
because yeah I have more hope because of what they've shown already yeah they keep saying
about the story well yeah that they've obviously I mean they've they've got like you can
interact with the environment they've already shown you can interact the environment in a more
meaningful way than you can in destiny
you know you have a grapple hook instantly
instantly you know that obviously they're going to be
thinking how the fuck can we make
the master chief use the grapple hook we need to come over
every way that a player would want to use a grapple hook
and we need to put it in the game
that isn't that isn't something that you see in destiny
not to like shit all over destiny
because destiny does what it does and it does it fine
does it well even but
I think just with the grapple hook
and the idea that they're thinking about the
spaces and a
they're thinking about it in a 4D chess kind of
I guess I'm more concerned about their thought process and how they're going to reward the player
because I guess that's my biggest destiny fear is because I really don't really like the way you're rewarded for playing that game
whereas I like the kind of simplicity of the original Halo idea where kind of the rewards are just
finding weapons on the map and the 30 seconds of fun and if it's if it becomes like yeah
finding different weapon variants and like mods and pickups and shit i don't know how halo that would
be but again it's all conjecture because they haven't really revealed that much but what do you think jim
my main hope it this is how i've felt since like the beginning but that microsoft has so much
riding on this yeah they really need it to do well because they don't have anything that can
compete with any one of
Sony's exclusives
they've got game but it can't just do well
either it needs to actually be good
game has to be fucking that's what I mean that
it yeah it needs to be
equivalent to like God of war
you know it just has to be
a quality game it
it shouldn't be about
making the the mega
code bucks
it should be about releasing
something that like actually
leaves an impact. I just find it shocking how little kind of support the Halo franchises
really got. Like it got more like experimentation from when Bunchy originally had it where they
made like Halo Wars 1. You really would expect when like three for three took off that they
would be like having multiple projects on the go. It's like the A got Star Wars and did fuck all with
that. What is it about like this this total apathy that you seem to see now in the games industry?
huge license gets handed to you yeah and then what you do nothing with it is they're just
like um well you know we got this so we have halo let's make cod i mean i i think this is better
than if we'd have just started getting yearly halos like my point is if this was the plan
yeah it's just like what the what's the plan yeah they keep talking no because um they've talked about
how like they
wanted Halo 5
to be like a spin-off game but that
like became Halo 5 like they wanted
to do kind of spin-off projects like OBST
style stuff. Yeah
whereas it seems like they're
trying to build
like a foundation that
would be easier to expand on in some way
I don't know it just seems
crazy that they wouldn't be doing more
with the property
it's like it's like dead
James has been saying it for years like it's
It's been dead for a long time
They really should have made Halo 5 a spin-off though
Calling a Halo 5 makes it so much worse
Halo Guardians or some shit
Yeah
It'd be easier to ignore too
Because did you see in the article
They had like a bit of a story tease thing
With like an audio clip that had like
Chief talking about
Cortana
And
I didn't see that
Was it good?
Is it worth listening to or Kring and Best Left Alone?
um i'd say it's worth listening to if you're into the
the kind of hype cycle stuff they start doing
because they're actually teasing like the
the halo five side of the story with the evil
cortana thing and that she has some control over the ring or whatever
so we'll see um i'm feeling a bit better than
i did before i'm just
we need to see it in motion and we need like a multiplayer reveal i think before
i do wish they don't
had this way of showing it off the whole time we're just like we monthly update yeah
bimonthly updates or whatever of just screenshots and letting us know I will say yeah I don't
really have the fear of um the game like looking really ugly and running bad yeah it
definitely looks like it's gonna look kind of great actually yeah especially because the
game still has like a real long time I'm sure they're gonna make it as smooth as possible
Did you see that they said that they finished all the content that's going to be in the game?
Like it's all, it's all done.
Yeah, yeah.
It's just then polishing everything.
So that's interesting.
Good, maybe.
Anything, James, before we go into the mid-break?
No, that's pretty much everything's said.
Like, I'm not...
I've lost faith in Halo, so I just want the product to speak for it.
If the product is good, I will have faith.
but I'm not going to look anything
because we should have learned by now
just don't look at anything
like cyberpunk just
get to the end product and have an opinion
don't go into it.
No, I think it's fine to look at stuff
and like what they're saying about the game
but it's more manage your expectations
you know.
Well, the best thing about Microsoft exclusives now
is that if you have game pass anyway
you can download something
when it comes out
try it for an hour or whatever
and then just uninstall it if it sucks.
Yeah, okay. And on that note, we'll see you after these.
You get your monkey strength.
Welcome to the part of the show, where we go over and thank our patrons.
Over a Patreon for the lovely support.
Big thanks to White Jacob, Ruben eating crunchy ice.
Oh my God, so true, bestie.
We live in a society where I fought stereotypes were kind of ridiculous.
Hot A.I. Booty Mendicin Bias.
Do-Doo-Roo.
Clunge Bob Spunk Trunks.
Ew. Ah. Yeah.
Ooh. Look what you've done to my bloody shed, man.
That's a good one.
Subscribe to Clostle is Crazy.
Will you be the pisser punani to my pisser dick and make me the happiest man on earth?
Crash Punk.
David Bowie died a day before the first childcast.
He then went on to be reborn as dick the head.
Change my mind.
Schnaught.
Minga Dinger, Wingatung, molesting a child in Sweden gets you seven days in prison, see you in a week, guys.
If you change that to Swindon, it's as believable.
Minge for eyes, fancy Nancy, sucking on James' fat milkers, little duckie, big chungus, William.
God, Dibby, I'll be anything for you. God, Dibby, just tell me what you want me to do.
C3PO's Long Golden Slong.
In the face, face shot.
brains everywhere, not the knee, not the arm, not the spine, face, it has to happen.
I forgot to change my name for like four weeks and I'm shitting myself, Ruben will shout
at me.
Salad 543?
There existed an addiction to squash.
Right, what the hell kind of name is pisser dick, eh?
How to Muppet like you pass election?
Adam McBride, Krusty Kamakaze.
If James is pisser dick, who is shitter arse?
I used to be a jarling like you, but then I took a witty to the bum, or a bit rude of you to comment on me 25 bollocks in it for a very
Harry Wardley
Yo do's
The JAR Media patron
Is pretty chill
Maybe you should
Like come join
Or something
Big Cheezer
Listen to sound
Ancestors
Master Chief
You mind telling me
What you're doing
With that blimp
Do I hate
Jars bars
Johnny Johnny
Yes Papa
Pounding Pussy
Yes Papa
JAR Media's
Lord of the Ming's
The Return of King Julian
Thank you
Thank you to
The Doopster
AKSI-LGBQ
Plus
Flag Stolen
flag dropped. ODST. Standing by. Odie, Odie, Odie, Odie, Odie, Odie, God, Eta, Medag, Morgan, Kveld, Ella, Nat, Dammer, Og, Harrow. Out of the damn way. A.k.a. Review Tech Blackwater. I remember you was conflicted. Misusing your influence. And it went a little something like this.
The Bush Bush. KS. Please stop wearing my mother's wedding dress. Import 3D guest. You know, I've always thought Patreon names were a little ridiculous.
is Akpan, and Dice Tuth, Lego, sup, Mike, Ock, Boogie 2988, Gilbert the awesome one.
Catheter Berg, Capri Sun.
This Patreon is the evil fucking penguin from Wallet and Gromis, the curse of the curse of the...
Nate's mini figs, check him out on Instagram.
Cortana, relay coordinates, Schlomsion Hamalka, 15, 9418203, Jerusalem, Israel, to the chief.
I'd like to have a bucket with him.
Good with tennis balls.
Big Muscle TV.
O-1-1-I-E-2.
Mr. Cheesy Watsits that crunch on his head,
1000.
Boris Johnson versus Margaret Thatcher, dawn of Brexit.
Come eight, this time it's piss.
Big Mouth Episode 1, the Phantom Dush.
Cobalt Red.
Ruben's special boy.
That nest of Dungars.
Pee-Poo-Poo-Cum.
Come. Come sex asshole.
Drain, Mike Hock, Johnson.
My ancestors are smiling at me, review tech Tamriel.
Can you say the same?
21 Grammys, superstar Frammies.
We the new Jack Me's.
I'm all about that act mees.
Blade Runner, 277.
All of these names and more at the JAR Media Patreon.
Sign up today.
BDSM Wax Player uses special wax with the melting points
slightly higher than human body tamp.
Therefore could be melted and drank.
I fucked my sister thanks to James.
Joseph Jewish Jarling.
Public Kangaroo Executioner.
Doug Walker.
holding James' hand softly while teaching him how to suck a cock.
I am the Glob Gaggab Golab.
Jack. Tom Fudging Armstrong.
Welcome to the Islamic Communist Revolution.
The Christian capitalist status quo has gone on too long.
Hello and thank you.
Hi honey. I'm home from the future.
Cosmic mapping.
Piss drinkers unleashed.
I'm going to get a detailed backpiece tattoo of Argi and you can't stop me.
Aaron Kavanaugh.
League of Super Evil, Voltaar, Dr. Frog, Red Menace, Doomageddon, League of Evil, League of Super Evil, Gunch My Klanch,
Inebel Doble, Michael Mann 2000, Stephen is Human, Konitado, butter me up some porn on the cob,
Pokemon Diamond and Pearl Harbor. That one episode of the Angry Joe show where they dressed up as
unkempt testicles, I'm not fucking joking. What? Cassia fucking mannequin, and wait, where's David Wallace?
unsubscribe from us. This is breaking my
hearts. David, please. My mom
found my Patreon bills and thought
it was like only fans and that I was giving money
to naked internet girls.
Whose heads were beheaded.
Well, the 17,000
people that B. SBA order
to execute. Often
revolutions don't bring any good.
Thomas Martin. Thomas Martin,
Thomas Martin, Evan Pierce, Martin, Evan
Barton Pierce, Thomas the handjob, Martin,
Evan Jennifer, Farton, the Kant, Thomas.
Divorced, beheaded, died. Divorce,
per-headed, I'm ordering you to send a.I.
Cahog Police Department supports gamers.
Quebec films.
Chris Warren.
There's no mouth to urinate in.
Oura.
Mercedes.
Cool dip chip.
Keck Flexington.
Numa-Numa Banana.
Ben.
Fartbag.
George Kenwood Parker.
Fondle.
Fiddle, aka the cream dimension.
Dream awful 214-2.
The guerrillas from Singh
go on a holiday to Swindon on a trip to see.
the eighth wonder of the world, the magic roundabout.
Rutt Row Raggy, Ramey is going Reist of Roy.
Fion O'Gorman, Melvin, brother of the Joker,
Tomcat, King Kong Fan 3,
David Wallace, and finally, Fat Cock Man.
Big thanks to Pimp Cowboy, William Knowles,
Acolyte, I'm sorry I cheated on you, piss a dick,
I couldn't help myself around your sister, milk a tit, says Drinker Mouth.
James is the milk made, his milk is delicious.
Danny G. Base Lord.
Review tech grips dibidosa.
Egy Erica.
Alex sensually whispering razor flesh into your ear.
Mama death stranding butthole picks.
Check out Nate's mini-figs on Instagram.
Lewis Big Boy Borshro Horsborough.
Ferdiya Pleeman.
Sam Buckley, aka Revuteek Swindon.
Number one, Lisa Ann Fan.
Snake, what happens?
Snake, answer me, Snake.
Sam, Mordecaiser Mainz rise up, Adam Johnston, Tomuis, Juan Hernandez, Jam, SpongeBob Square Pant, Honey, I'm hurt, I swear I'm not.
Hey, Speedster, hope you're doing well, I hope you jar boys are doing well too, Caleb.
Logie Bear, to elaborate, James got that Henry Cavill look and I was like, ho damn, you get me?
Jake White, Big Whoops, Grembleau, Spock, the Rock, Doc, and Hulk Hogan.
Mo-me-ma-me-ma-me-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma.
Big cheese, Kuta Panda.
1110-1-1-0-1-0. V.
Lucy Tire is an Asian anal queen.
Local units. All units.
Randy ruins Patreon.
Justice for Ben Shapiro.
Just kidding. Fuck that guy.
The douche.
The life and deaths of Nick Crawl.
Katia fucking Manigan.
Ambush, Anong, Orange.
And finally, David Wallace.
Thanks for the support, everyone.
Arro-ro!
Welcome to the Ro-R-R-R-R-R-R-P part of the cast,
where we answer Ro-R-R-R-Ros from the Jjar community
over on our subreddit,
head over to the suggestion thread
and ask us whatever you like.
Yorn Mel is going to start us off with a sad one.
Any thoughts on Darth Punk's breakup?
I'm personally sad to see it happen
as there's my favourite band.
but all good things must come
to an end
I'm fucking heartbroken boy
yeah I wasn't expecting it
I'm fucking upset
because there's only there's one thing in my life
I would destroy my entire
future for one thing
and that's seeing a live
life
they did it fucking twice
in how many years
nope
20 never happening
just fuck yeah I was
that was always like a dream
in my in the back of my mind
but the more realistic one was
yeah maybe you'll get at least one more
Darth punk album before I die
just one more
that's what I was hoping for
just maybe one
this is the bullshit thing though
because I don't know if I'm
like still in
the stages of
grief
because in my mind
like it
the possibility of there
someday being another
album or song or
something just something
like it still exists in my head
that it's a possibility
so I would have preferred to just hear nothing
no yeah I think
like it's like Halo
like in my mind Halo's been dead
Darth Punk's been dead since RAM
if they just did no news at all
that would have been much better to me
because I just assumed they're dead anyway
well yeah it reminds me a bit of
like guerrillas
after plastic beat
And it was like some argument that went down and it just seemed like they would just never make anything ever again.
But then years later, something comes of it, but I don't know if I can really see that happening here.
So what has actually happened?
Because I've heard things saying they've retired make sense and I've heard they've broken up.
What's the deal?
Art Punk as a project is over for the time being.
You could see them reunite.
some years to come but I would say
at least a decade would pass before we saw
something like that
maybe even two
I mean the two guys
they'll continue probably to do
whatever they do you know they
they're going to stop making music ever
you know it's what they do it's like their passion
so I'm pretty sure Thomas is
going into being a director
oh really? Yeah
did you watch the final video
the epilogue yeah it was made up
of the shots of their movie
the one they directed.
Really fucking boring movie.
It's nothing. There's nothing there, but really cool visual things.
And that's what you've seen on our YouTube videos and whatnot.
Classic, pretentious French bullshit right there, man.
That's the way they do it.
Yeah, maybe it's a good thing they broke up.
Yeah, I was kind of hoping it would be like just one final song or something.
Yeah.
But no.
it has made me go back and listen to a bunch of their songs and like fucking hell no no one did what they did like to the the quality of them unbelievable music yeah yeah it's whenever i put on ram i just appreciate the actual like audio quality just how high quality the like recording is no that that's an interesting uh wikipedia read
oh really yeah on that album because they went all out like it it was just sort of designed to be the peak of sound
mm-hmm so what's our ratings then on all of the albums
damn you're just going to drop that on me right now I've got an answer already I've got more
a live 2007
um discovery
human after wall ram
and then homework
not a based answer at all not at all based
a live is the best album easy
and you know this even
because he spoke about this you know that
not based not based
discovery's
top tier we all know that
um i don't think i can
it's just sort of like you know
all of their albums
are like
S tier
yeah that's a thing
they're all incredible
human after all
it's like
I don't know
massively different things
I can't compare
the homework
is like a classic
well I don't know
I guess it's like French house
of the 90s
yeah
Discovery is
kind of still that
but moving a bit away from it
and incorporating like
a bit I don't know
I guess there's like
some disco elements to it
human after all
like a total like techno album
Live is just a fucking amazing live album
And then they make a soundtrack
Tron
And that's good
And the only
The only redeeming thing about the film
Is their music
And their music makes me want to watch the film
Then I watch the film
I'm reminded that it sucks
And it's really boring
But their music's really good
So it's kind of tough that
They need to do the cut of that movie
Where all of the sound is taken
Outside from the soundtrack
Yeah I'd watch that
I would definitely watch that.
And then Rana Max's memories.
It's like the homage to the music which inspired the genre that then inspired them to make music within that genre.
You know, because obviously disco led to a lot of the shit that they were sampling for everything.
It's like a circle.
They've completed the cycle there.
It's all done.
Actually, when you see all of the albums in a line like that, it does actually see.
Yeah, that's exactly what I'm just circling my mouse around.
No one can even, I was just circling my mouse.
like gesturing as if anyone can see it but yeah man it's a complete project it's
over Darth punk man they did it came they saw they made the best shit and then they
fucked off yeah could be worse I suppose could be like they could have died you thing
yeah they could have died that would suck I think about that sometimes like what if
freddie mercury was like alive and was just kept making music that whole time
be cool
what if he is one of the daft punks
yeah
he did the vocals on
human after all
on technologic
god
guys I just had a sip of Coke zero
fucking sucks compared to Pepsi Max
Jorno pizza has one for us
I was shaving my balls
while listening to the latest episode
and I have to say it was an exquisite experience
hearing all of your silky smooth voices while making my balls look dashing
was the highlight of my day
my ball shaving experience has never been that good before
we are really funny and the trouble is if you're shaving and we make you laugh too hard
you might slip and slice your nut sack open and I just don't want to hear
I thought that's where it was going to be honest with you say I cut myself
um the question part though my question is um
well there was a question which which madagascar character is each part of the male penis
Left ball, right ball, shaft and head
All right, so this is simple, this is simple
The left and right ball are Gloria and Melman
Wait, which is whipped though
Because I'm thinking left ball is Melman
No which you know everyone has like one ball that droops down
Which one is the drooper?
But the droopy one's glorious
Yeah, it's Gloria, yeah
So whichever one that is I guess it changes depending on who you are
And then the shaft is
is Marty because really he's
he makes up the bulk of what it
you know of the funny in that film
you know Marty and then at the head
what do you mean that you mean those
I don't know I disagree there
I think of the second one when I think
of Madagascar as a whole
I think of Madagascar too he gets like the least
screen time in Madagascar too
he's like he's funny in it though
when he is in it
yeah Alex is the shaft
yeah like no no Alex is the head of it
because he gets all the glory
yeah like a main as well yeah
but the shaft is what sort of really
and he's a sensitive little pussy too
yeah exactly
exactly
who's the foreskin
no but where's the foreskin of all of this
I don't like that
that's just penis one in cyberpunk
and I'm not interested in it
I don't remember which way around it is
I played the game when it came out
I guess it's America
I haven't gone back since
um Alex Sandgren actually replied
to their comments saying
A, I've also listened to them
While shaving my balls
So I guess it's a bit of a trend
Going around town
They just listen to us in the shower, I guess
I've never bothered listening to a podcast in the shower
I always figured the voices would get sort of drowned out
By the water where music can kind of punch through
The sort of frequencies that voices are on
I kind of figured it wouldn't do it
Do you sing in the shower?
I sing in the rain
Not often
But you do
On occasion
On occasion
but usually it's early in the morning when I'm having a shower and you know
I don't want to sing that's the best time for singing that's when the birds are doing it
I can barely keep my eyes open I close my eyes to wash my hair and I'm like I could just stand
still and go to sleep here you know forget it James do you sing in the shower yeah I'm
fucking grooving I'm fucking sticking the hose pipe up my ass just fucking going on it you know
I sing I sing gravity hurts in the shower every morning
Samana Boni says
In a bunch of older episodes
You lot
Especially Alex kept on hyping up
A super secret jar project in the works
Are you still making it
If you aren't
Which would be my guess
Then you can finally inform us
What your grand plan was
For said project
We're not making it
We can't
It's impossible to finish
It's not sure
Wait
Is this
Wait which project
is this this is EC oh this is EC you know yeah yeah no no just we don't need
to actually explain this because um they don't deserve to know but um I will
say going back to that side cringe post the EC was actually on that upvoted
sad cringe uh GR picture thing the secret has been hiding in plain side
for a long long time yeah but it's never happening though never say never well
it's not around anymore is it well no we know we know we know no James no more
Princess Leia died and she was still in a movie when we get a big enough budget
yeah we'll just get the Disney effects team yeah we have enough um footage anyway for
an effective deep fake if we download some
software. I'm moly
we can deep fake that you see on to James
James can play the UC
son of Julius Caesar has one for us
if you could be a fly on the wall
to any historical event
what event would that be? Personally
I think it would be really cool to go back
in time and just watch a day
in ancient Rome thanks boys love
the Yogs Pogs cringe
that's not a
historical event I want to point out
that's too broad for my liking
yeah that sucks
shit answer so we're not answering your question
mine would be
watching the
first dinosaur egg hatching
okay
why if I'm allowed to be a fly
wouldn't you want to discover some
some truth to something
yeah to see a dinosaur with my own eyes
my own fly eyes what truth is that
this. What truth?
What to see them like walking around
and like moving? It would be like
So you don't necessarily
believe that dinosaurs are real?
No, I believe they're real. I just think
it would activate fight or flight
to see them moving around.
Oh, that'd be terrifying.
Imagine that. Just being a pathetic little
homo sapien looking at a fucking dinosaur.
I had, the
moment it all clicked and came into
place was, I was on like some
family holiday with Jim and
my other family.
I think we're at the Eden Project,
which is like this
place in Cornwall,
where they have all these like
these domes with all these
different environments.
They're like big greenhouses basically.
And in the dome that was like the
kind of desert environment,
they had this like guy
dressed up in this costume.
This like weirdly good
like dinosaur
dress up costume thing.
And
it was like running around the dome
and I saw it like running around
and it did trigger like the fight
or flight thing in my mind
like just seeing like a huge
bipedal monster
because this guy's wearing
like leotards
black leotards
and his legs are attached to these
fake dinosaur legs
but you don't notice his real
legs at first so it just
I thought like some dinosaur
had just turned up
you know
some egg was in the Eden project
and it got too warm in there or something
it genuinely was like
you see it out the corner of your eye
you look at it and then your heart sinks
and you're like
it's time to kill or time to
fucking bolt
yeah your ape brain just can't
yeah
yeah of course I want to experience that
as a fly especially
yeah
James I feel like you have an interesting one
to what
fly on the war on any historical event
this is
this is a hard one
because it's just like there could be things that are like
important
I know what I mine would be
I'm trying to think I've got an obvious answer
but that's what's yours then Rubin
I'd want to be there the day before
the library of Alexandria got fucking destroyed
and I'd read I'd read
I'd look around
I'd be flound the wall
in every goddamn wall
and then maybe
hang around for when they burned it down
just have a look
to see what's going on,
aliens,
that kind of thing.
You see my mind
goes immediately
to conspiracy theories.
Yeah,
no,
I'm going down that part
because I'm like,
it would be really interesting
to know who actually
killed JFK.
Yeah, that is the one
my mind with you're watching
the guys.
Was it Mason?
Yeah.
It was actually
words.
Yeah, who was it?
Can you imagine, like,
you go there to see,
and it is Mason?
What do you do?
What is your response to that?
Like, I think I'm going to
kill myself. I think I'm
a conspiracy now. You couldn't
tell anyone because they just think
you're fucking
lazy. I swear, it is
Mason guys.
And Hudson turns up
at your door.
No, but also, that guy,
Bob Lazar,
check out what the fuck he was doing
if he actually saw some aliens
or if he was just, like, cracked out or something.
That would be interesting as well, yeah.
Alex, you run the risk, though, if you do the dinosaur one.
If it, it, like, comes out the egg,
and it just looks like so fucking lame
like we got the we got all the fossils
just totally wrong
and they just
dinosaurs just fucking sucked
how bummed hell would you be
no because that's a joke isn't it
where like you you don't know
what the the fat density is
because it's just bones
or not even like real bones that are left
I think it's really cool
those like artists have drawn
T-Rex and feels like a fat bird
Yeah
That to me looks kind of awesome
Kind of scary
I haven't seen this
That's a tear X if it's a fat bird
Well yeah because they're little hands
They're kind of wing-like
You know like if a
Imagine if you had a penguin skeleton
And you had no idea what a penguin looked like
What kind of animal would you imagine
To go on that skeleton
I guess they don't have teeth
but it makes a big difference
Jim was it you I was telling about the yellow penguin
the yellow penguins yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah they found a yellow penguin
was it nice
um
it was all right
Spacekeeper 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4
says if you had one chance to save him
how would you stop Brian
from dying.
I put Stewie in his stead.
I put Peter.
Peter?
No, not Peter.
No, I hate Peter.
I would have it
so that the house next door
was having an extreme home makeover
and we would have a really big bus block
in the road.
And when
tie
something
than or other, it's getting everyone to say move that bus,
I'd shoot him in the head, and then it'd be chaos.
The bus would probably try and turn around, and it would be all crazy.
The car that's going to hit Brian wouldn't hit him.
We'd hit the bus.
Damn.
Maybe kill some children, but Brian lives.
That's the main thing, I think.
Or Stee could become Darth Vader and learn to stop people from dying.
Go down that path, you know?
I don't mind that very much.
What, Darth Stewie? What's wrong with that imagery?
I'm so lame.
That's already a thing, though.
Fuck, I forgot. Yeah, the family guy movies.
I thought that's what you were alluding to you.
I'd actually just forgotten that they did that.
Fuck, sake.
Max 09, Willow 24 has one.
A really weird one.
Lads, I need some help.
Recently, my mate told me that when he was seven,
he saw a monkey's hand and arm in a soft play area coming out of one of the tunnels.
After he saw it, it dashed off.
Now this sounds stupid, but when you take into consideration that around this time there was a monkey spotted in the area,
it sounds like it could have happened.
Or it might just be some weirdo in a monkey costume.
This has not left my mind since he told me, since I worship the almighty jar gods,
please tell me if you think he's speaking the truth.
then he replied to it saying
this is ruining my life
well I'd say it's bullshit
because kids only bullshit
yeah I mean
I bullshit it a lot
as much as I would love
let to be a monkey I just don't think that was man
I'm sorry I think you'd need to
hear the seven year old out
hear their side of it
you know kids they're
they're very honest
so
I reckon if he if he genuinely saw one
and you like could make the case for it.
Maybe I'd believe it.
But yeah, I don't know.
It could be a tricksy little monkey himself, you know.
You've got a question.
How would the monkey get in the tunnel of the bull pit?
Well, that's not really much of a concern to me
because I just think about like boomerang and all that lot
and just the monkey in there would wreak havoc.
How would you ever get it out?
I think the weirdest thing in this question is that like he said that other option
is that it was a person in a monkey costume
Yeah, yeah
That's the
Laying motionless for hours on end
Just hiding in like a bullpen area
It's like getting covered in like piss and shit
Honestly out of those two options
I think it's more likely that there was a real monkey
Yeah, I would sooner the monkey
than a human being
Someone like
Made a realistic monkey costume
and went to a kid's play area
and was just like running around.
Just to taunt seven-year-olds.
No, but you got to question
how a monkey won't just get into a bull pit.
Why?
They'd fucking love a bullpit.
He didn't say bullpits, they didn't he?
He said it was a tunnel.
He said it was a kid's play area, right?
Like a soft play area.
Some of the areas are pretty dank and tucked away.
I could imagine there being a little monkeys there.
No, but the thing is, if a monkey's gone loose in the area,
it's not going to be able to get through any pipework
because it's all like gated off.
It'd have to walk through the front door
and if it said that someone would sit...
Well, look, because they're only like...
It would put on an elaborate disguise.
You know, he'd have a little hat
and a trench coat, yeah.
Yeah, and he would just walk in.
I'm thinking like he takes the air vent or something.
He climbs a pipe, gets up to the top,
goes through an air vent.
They can't.
Dark work ventilations are all sealed up
on the other side you and be able to get through.
Well, James, have you ever heard of the term
monkey strength.
Have you ever heard of
I fitted dot work
and I know where it goes
I can tell you
a monkey...
So they're designed
you've clearly
never heard
a monkey strength
you've clearly
never heard a monkey strength
monkey strength
monkey strength
I would say
it was an imagination
because I saw
ghost as a child
so it's probably
an imagination
monkey strength
you are
you need to take
monkey strength
into a
into a cat
I can't do it anymore.
It's all going wrong.
Oilholic has one for Ruben.
Can Rubin still do his underdog Joe Pascuali impression?
It's been far too long.
What? This one?
Underdog.
Get your monkey strength.
Try it short.
We have a brilliant one that's directed at James.
James, I'm going to need you to have, like, your phone ready with, like, Google images, okay?
Yes, I've just popping up Google.
So, Pass Force Worldwise, says, could James please give us a part two for cartoon Milfs from the list below?
Okay.
So we need your, um...
What?
Okay, okay.
I think of...
I'm trying to remember this topic.
It was like months ago.
We collected all the famous TV show Milfs.
Like, you know, your Marge Simpsons, your Louis, Louis, Louis, Lewis Griffins, just to hear James's, um, wouldn't he?
Where did Lois come in the mouth?
I'm pretty sure it was low.
No, you said yes to Lois.
I know, I did.
Lois is a haughty what you did come about.
He was just yes or no, right?
Yeah, yeah.
So these are the new ones, James.
I need to answer.
Okay.
So the first one is
Timmy Turner's mum
That would be from failure of parents
No
No
Um
Yes that's a fucking straight yes
God damn
I've got to keep up with this
Yeah I'm keeping up
As well
Um
So that's a yes
For Timmy Turner's mum
Really
Yes
Yes
Okay
You're forgetting
He's the Milfantus
What about Kyle's mum from South Park?
I'm just, I'm fucking spelling mistakes everywhere.
What's her name like something, bro?
No, that's a hard no.
That's a hard, bar.
The aunt from Big Hero 6.
That's a fucking, yes.
Mrs. Incredible.
I don't know.
Mrs. Incredible.
Yeah, I'm trying to spell it.
You know what Mrs. Incredible looks like.
Come on.
Yeah, obviously.
That's like the definitive cartoon Mulf.
Yeah.
So that's a yes, obviously, yeah?
Yes, obviously.
Peggy Hill?
Peggy Hill is that?
Hank Hill.
No, that's a...
No.
Any others or was that the last one?
Um, last one, the mum from Dexter's lab.
That's also a no.
Okay, so you said yes to Timmy Turner's mum, but not...
Yes.
Okay.
There's no logic to the mill phatings, Jamie.
It's a... you just know it, okay?
Um, Mumbo Bumbo.
has the most, maybe the most fucked up question now I've ever, ever snagged for this.
Hi Jal, so my question is,
if you had a really smelly room,
could you remove the smell by hoovering the air?
Like holding the hoover up at the mostly smelly areas.
I'm asking this question because I've been farting like mad lately.
Change of diet to achieve effect.
He added in parentheses and was wondering,
would you need a window open to reload the air
or would the smell particles be destroyed by the movement of the hoover?
You need to reload the air.
Reload that air.
So they're saying their room smells because they change diet.
Like the smell is just staying.
They said the implication is that they changed their diet to achieve an effect
the effect being that
they wanted to fart a lot
but now they have a new problem
you've got to reload yeah that's it
you've got to open the windows because your parts are
going to stick to the curtains in the car
but you're going to fill that room a fart
and it's going to be a fucking mess
you're going to have to open some windows
I'm just picturing
someone's standing in a room
farting and then vacuuming up
their parts are a easy solution
easy solution
a solution solution
fart but have a vacuum
came on like under your ass at all
times so just
just yeah you got to start vacuuming
the area then fart
it's preemptive that would work yeah
what you do is you and do it while you're laying in bed
so you can trap all to the fart gas
and then if you breathe it all up
you know you're just getting rid of it all
holy shit
no I know I know where this guy is coming from
because I had a fucking kebab yesterday and my farts can kill
people right now
just have to do you
reload the air?
Yeah,
reload the air
constantly.
You know,
get a few
diffusers
going.
Yeah,
but you,
you,
that smell
should never linger.
What if the fart smell?
Yeah.
It shouldn't.
Like,
if you don't have
a vacuum cleaner handy.
What if you fart
and you're sat down
on like a thick blanket?
When you move,
the fart,
you know,
you get a bit more of it,
don't you?
You know?
Like if you're let in bed,
you've got the duvet over.
You fart.
There's some fart trapped under the bed
Yeah, it's fucking disgusting
And if you keep farting
Eventually the room just stinks a farts
Just smells a fart
Yeah, whenever I go into
Whatever room Argy's been in
That shouldn't last longer
No, don't talk about Argy
Agi's not a good example
Unless you're like on a spaceship
He's a disgusting little beast
He ate four
Oreo like eggs
the other day
I had like a pack of them in my backpack
that I'd left in
by my desk
and he got in the room and opened my backpack
and opened them and ate them all
why is he so fucked up
can you imagine that
even four of those
in a couple minutes
it's fucking Alex's reaction to
every time like
he does something
fucking ridiculous
and it's just like
there's like
there's just like fear
in the laugh
almost
oh there's definitely fear
no the first time
he did that
I was concerned
because obviously
chocolate's awful
for dogs
um
and the whole
allergy side of it
those are your eggs
like I could only
barely eat two in a sitting
because they're fucking
really strong
they're so chocolatey
they feel sick
How could he just destroy two and not feel anything?
No, we have four.
Four?
Yeah.
He's fucked up.
No, but it's weird because no matter what happens, he finds food.
Even if you put it in the most bizarre place, he finds it and he just fucking eats all of it.
He's a fucked up dog.
The other day, I had some meal that had like, obergine and, um, uh,
What's the horrible...
Corgette.
Corgette, yeah.
I had corgette in it as well.
So there were a couple chunks of like
corsette left over on my plate.
And I left it there, like in the coffee table.
And when I came down in the next morning,
he hadn't touched it.
And I was like surprised.
I was like half leaving it there as a test
to see if you would even try,
considering that it's not like,
He loves cheese, so if there's no cheese involved, I figured he wouldn't really be interested, but it wasn't there when I came down in the morning, but then, uh, within the space of like 15 minutes, he'd, like, just eaten it.
Like, it's like he waited for me to be around and be, like, wary of it before he ate it so he could, like, purposefully annoy me.
That's weird.
Yeah.
He's trying to get a reaction.
That's what he's doing.
He's, yeah, he's, like, trying to piss me off.
off or something, okay?
Vibrating Pablo has up an ultimate one.
If piss a dick
was a person or a living thing,
how would piss dick look like?
Could someone provide a sketch?
I like to imagine your conversations in my head
and would like verified draft
or what piss a dick would look like,
of what piss a dick would look like.
Also, if James is pisser dick,
what would he be wearing
with his particular costume
blue jumper
white sort of shirt
I think under it
I want to say
a pair of blue jeans
possibly some sunglasses and a hat
was it purple I thought it was a blue one
the shirt was blue
the shirt was okay
yeah and there was definitely sunglasses
like a hat
a hat
was it the way was it the son of cat
it was a son of cat
sunglasses. Why did
you wear all that stuff, James?
Wait, when in the two?
Why did you wear all that?
Wait, wait, wait, stop, stop.
I wobble those things.
Wait, I did this.
Your piss of dick.
When, no...
When did piss of dick become a thing?
It was New Year's Day.
It was New Year's Eve.
It was New Year's Eve. It was a fifth.
I thought it was, it was like, at New Year's.
It was like, we were together because it was New Year's.
Yeah, on New Year's Eve, right?
Or had it tipped over into the next?
I'm not sure if it had gone past, I guess it hadn't gone past midnight,
because James wouldn't have been so loud being Pissadoo.
My memory's gone.
I thought Pissadik was just a jar joke.
I didn't know this is like an actual thing like from before, but I did.
Yeah.
Yeah, you admitted it.
You're fucking with my mind. Why are you doing this?
You make this a dick.
We've actually convinced them.
This isn't funny.
This is how the CIA did it. This is how they do it.
You genuinely...
Do you not remember though, James?
Shut up!
No!
This is the next Black Oats game.
Why can't you remember?
You went through a red door, and then you put on a blue jumper.
And sung...
I hate you.
You're be using my sleep-deprived mind.
James, well.
got one more question then
um
is this about
shitar
no unfortunately
it's not about shitter us
um
but it is about something
equally as important
they say
is the song
blame game
by Kanye's
most beautiful
dark twisted fancy
part of the
Madagascar law
due to it
featuring Marty
on the outro
is
Kanye, in fact, playing the role of Melman
and trying to contact Gloria only to
find out she dates Martu.
Um.
Um.
Every time I listen to that song, I
do get good laugh at that bit.
So fucking
terrible.
Do you not like it?
Ah.
Uh, I just
can't deal with it. Oh, man.
Because you go from this,
you know my
easy taught me
you know you go from
let's play to blame
game
I love you
and you know
they sort of
not a sentimental
but kind of
dramatic
instrumental
I was in
pussy town
you know
it's just fucking stupid
yeah but don't you just
picture Marty
you're like
easy
taught me
was that question
specifically for James
yeah
just for James?
Um,
I knew he'd like it.
Well, James, we're waiting.
Yeah.
I've never listened to it.
I should say you'd like it more
because of it.
To say that, we can all move on.
You've never heard blame game, James.
Have you never listened to that album?
No, that's...
I...
No, there's only one good song on it.
Which is?
Stronger
Thank you for watching this episode of the exact motherfucker I want it
Thank you for watching this episode of the Charmedia podcast
I hope you had a good few funnies
Let's take it away
You get your monkey strength
