JAR Media Posdact - SUPER TRASH BRUDDAS - JARCAST Episode 131

Episode Date: October 11, 2018

It hurt my brain. Jim White, can you sit in your chair properly, please? So welcome back to... No, this is... I intro the show. James, the mic... I intro the show, and... You are in the host chair, after all.

Good afternoon, morning, evening, on our night. Ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to this episode of the Jammey podcast. Today, we are joined by special guest, the Bear Beaver Killer. How is it special? The Bear Beaver Killer. Oh yeah Dude I only remember that

Because I know last time we were playing CETI I just remembered it out of my mind of it That's amazing I have a feeling that video is live as well It is live, it's one of the lights on the live ones I just want to point out Right That clamp is leaning a lot

That needs to be tightened What one? This is your one The purple one Yeah James is good at yanking on them Oh geez Come on

Hey He's a fucking angry boy, though There you go Argy If you don't stop You're going on the naughty step Go naughty step now He's probably quite hot

Poor boy So I was just trying to move How can he be hot Alex What's he doing to be hot Being up here It's quite warm in here He's fucking freezing You should go somewhere else

Argy You're a fucking idiot Shorts that held up by a cable time so that's that's the opening out the way that was a good one can you can you james oh i introduced you who are you jim oh introduce you and who are you alix oh introduced you as well that's the uh the most boring member of this charcast um Alex that's me why why the fuck would you say that can you sit popply please james has got this event why are you sitting like that so you're gonna free country james yeah are you gonna discriminate against me because i

fucking live how i want to live it's not a free country i'm afraid it's england not a free country okay first thing we discuss is this this meme law that was fast it means fucking nothing stop overreacting give some context i don't know what is the meme law article 21 i believe article 13 article 13 and article 11 21 must have been a meme 21 the meme imagine if it was article 21 well basically guardian what the u you were making memes, like, copyrighted material, basically. So... I thought that was already happening anyway.

Like, you remember when Nyan Cat was put in some video game, and the creators of it were like, that's not on, and then they sued them or something? That's probably American, but... Basically, it's this whole law where it's like... But what's the... The idea is that they want tech platforms, you know, and websites and shit to have a filter that will filter

if content is copyrighted or not. So you could put a picture up doing a funny guy looking back at the other girl meme and it'd be like, you can't do that because it's copyright content. I was thinking while in the shower. Sure, my Google or Twitter might be able to implement that. But how's anyone going to implement a system

so then it works in Discord? You can still send memes to people. It's not going to change anything. It's just a silly idea. But it's just like, it can't be enforced. Nothing's going to happen. It's silly. So let's move on to something.

more exciting sit down jim please james is getting really frustrated about i like this new high up gym what's up guys i'm high up rick ruined it okay well what what what then moving yeah we've been i don't know just not that i've got something cringy i can quickly discuss with everyone we just were okay so i went on uh i i was bored the other day and i just went on google and i just went on google and put define Alex, define Rubin, define Jamie, define James. Okay. Right. And the Urban Dictionary comes up with every single one of our names.

Okay, well, no. Description. Okay, this is good. Okay, what description do you get? Be warned, they're pretty cringe. I'll start off with... What's urban dictionary? What do you expect?

I'll start off with the cringiest one, which is yours. Um, a very rare predator. Instructions for your Alex. Love your Alex. They are very loyal and affectionate. creatures except when given sugar, then they become slightly aggressive. Be wary of this. That's pretty true so far.

I thought Urban Dictionary was about like making fun of people. Yeah, I know, but this is just top cringe. Give them a lot of care and attention that otherwise they could turn against you and possibly eat you. Kawai sort of thing. It was right about the sugar though. I'm a dough boy at the moment. In shores to let them out at least five times a day, they tend to urinate frequently. also true yeah

most you put you in it frequently the reason I I'm talking about this because of the one for James by the way but I thought it necessary so do him last then

yeah I was gonna no start at a time did they okay I think I know it anyway I'm pretty sure I've like googled it off yawning sorry man what

Ruben googled oh right a guy who is just perfect he can be emotional at times but it's usually a great guy

and is protective over his lover that's it for Rubin my one I've screenshot of the wrong one and I can't be bothered to her find the right one so this is the female Jamie

a skinny girl usually dark haired Jamie is funny bubbly random and loves to sing most are artistic and love music boring boring shit

although shy at first when you get to know her you will love her so all of these are been just spot on so far your mind is about to be blown all right I've I've skipped a bunch of mine because it's fucking late a skinny car guy of a huge cat someone who is unusually on that

yeah yeah someone who is unusually well hung right well people with the name James are generally known for their good looks especially their eyes and women are just simply attracted to them none of that's true at all the cock thing maybe the eye thing's true I have green eyes which is no one actually knows if the James cock thing is because he changed his tune on it so often. It's like he forgets his own meme. That's the thing though.

James has memed it for a long time and then this confirms it. Oh, all right. Why would I mean? We're all game for you to put a picture, an honest picture in the group chat. It's not, you know, homosexual to do something like that. Eventually, it'll come out of nowhere.

It'll come out of nowhere. Because there's the rule that if you see another man's cock, you have to show him your cock. So we've all got a poster erect penises in the group chat at the same time. It'll be out of the blue One, just, like, 12 o'clock

I'd be like, let's do it, boys, and then boom, it'll go out. No, no warning. It's gonna happen. Okay, I'm down. We're doing with or without flash. Or we have to... Well, you've got a flash, Alex.

That's pretty good. That's pretty awesome. Or we all just stand in a circle in a room and it's just like, one, two, three. Yeah, but then you can't count. You'll just see my smushed up, squashed up, squashed up exactly

looking like it's the honest who in jars is a grower and who in jars a shower mine's a grower it's fucking nothing

normally it's just it's all yeah terrible I like that I enjoy that when it's like that

I think in winter after a shower you're sitting there like taking a piss and come on shake it around a bit

is this all I got is there anyone left here but me it's a Halo 5 reference that's not we all got

that one. I literally I'm the only one that I understand at all. It's like the most forgettable game I've ever played. It's pretty rubbish, yeah. Somehow we talk about it

nonstop. Especially like how... I don't talk about nonstop. I especially like how that Isaac Clark is the leader of Osiris. Oh, wait, no, not. It just looks like it.

Locke's helmet. It looks like Isaac's helmet in displace, too. That's such a bad joke. Nobody understood that. understood stuff. We might as the host for the most. James. So let's move on to another problem with that.

What is the next discussion area of this opportune? Yeah, James. Host us through this. Well, it's time we actually discuss something important. We're going to talk about Israel. No, we're going to talk about the over and over

and over music video. Just for a sec, because I watched it today. Over and over and over is a song by Jack White from his album, Boardinghouse Reach. It's a fucking awesome album, and it's a fucking awesome song. And let me tell you, video even more or some maybe like the song even more which is rare usually I just hate songs

afterwards the music videos but this was like 50 50 this it's like such a risk when you click on a music video is it's just going to improve the song and make it worse but it made it better it made a song that was already perfect even better especially if you listen to a lot of like weird indie music as well they have some like really bad god the pool side one I really hate that pool side one but they're just sort of like hanging around being skinny hipsters by a pool. Like the song, but God damn. They're walking through like a field.

Yeah. Well, I don't watch music videos. I like it when a music video, sort of, like, it looks like the artist when they wrote the song, this is what they see. Yeah.

Like, that. You kind of feel that with Jack White's one as well. Yeah, totally. I didn't understand that one. Made no sense to me at all. The thing is, like, I'm sure there's loads of stuff that if you looked into,

you could get some juicy slots out of it you know but as it is it's just like looks good music sounds good you just sit there like that's exactly how I felt mm-hmm exactly like that see I don't I don't relate to any of this at all what music videos yeah don't watch them well aren't you a fucking prodigy they don't change anything they don't do do do do do do do guerrilla's one's really good as well that's only one I see me You watched it? Oh yeah. Yes, because that's where it first came out on YouTube.

I was just like, I'm gonna watch this. It was really well animated and impressive. You sure we're talking about the right same one? You're sure we're talking about trends? No, there's a new one. It's a new, new one. I've not seen it, a couple days ago. There's a new new one.

Because like the now, now, the new... Ah, very good. Now now they released a new new new... Guys, what the fuck... What is this energy? What is this energy? I just... Where is the energy?

Where is the love Alex? I'm feeling the nose of energy. no i got energy got a lot of energy got a lot of people trying to dream me of my enemies who's that drake yeah the news about drake and his he's dead no his little model girlfriend oh he's like dating an 18 year old because it's straight up pedophilia it's not it's not how old is he it's not beatified 31 that's nothing you got like fucking i've never heard of these like billionaires these like 90 year old billionaires that are in wheelchairs that they're in wheelchairs that they're

18 year old models. Bella B. Harris. Well, that's because they're witch. Yeah. I'm going to become rich. So I can own a car. That's really nice. Anyway, guys, we've got to talk about something important for a change.

Venom's coming out. Not that. Come on. Give us the important discussion. Maybe we should do it in the second part. Oh. Because I just realized, like, I think only me and Ruben know. Oh, it's about fucking dabbing.

No, speaking of dabbing, James is fucking addicted to dabbing at the moment. When did I last dab? When you were driving yesterday? You were going... You were dabbing a lot. You're addicted, yeah, see? I don't do you throw Brian like that. Well, no, because it's like, when you're driving a car down,

You know, down the road, 120 more now. You just, you just, you hit a dab. Augie, get Brian. No, I don't want him to get Brian because it'll be ruined and that was a gift. I think dabbing is so fucking cool, and it's so cool. And the fact that people don't like it

when you dab is, makes it just incredible. You can't wait for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. Who gives a shit? I do. Isabel's in it, I think. There's Final Fantasy 12 coming out on all platforms. What does that matter?

So you've been playing it non-stop for about four years. And you still haven't even finished it. One year. And now you're just going to start it again. Why did you go into the exit? Why don't we talk about the severe political issues that are currently faced this world? No, it's seeming as we got nothing else, Israel it is. Alex, do you understand what happened with Israel?

I don't, personally, I don't think any of you know anything about Israel. I know more than you, and it's hilarious. I know stuff about it. Okay. Lighten us. It's hilarious. Well, Israel is in the legal state that the Arab League outlawed its creation of back in like the whenever, but the US was like, eh, and Israel was created anyway because everyone

else was like, fuck it, but the Arab League did not like it happening. They were less in the legal state, you can't do that. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Fuckish-ish-well. So anyway, don't look up Israel and shit because whatever, man. What do you mean, whatever? People are being torn from their homes by. Just play some Final Fantasy 12

Instead Let's buy a bunch of switches Fucking install Final Fantasy on them Just go over there When is Final Fantasy 13 Going to come out on the Switch? Four Fonnies go to Israel Go to Israel

If Final Fantasy If Final Fantasy 13 came out on the switch I'd buy that That's because you have fucking number Imagine sitting there on a plane train You're just fucking blasting away At fucking Final Fantasy 13 Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-la-

Best story ever I remember when I was obsessed with that soundtrack. Yeah, James was obsessed to Final Fantasy 13 for a time, but he's never once finished the game. Even with mods. Even with modding his character to level, you know, so their stats are all maxed out. No, I didn't, I didn't do that.

It's because the game is dog shit. Like, that's it. The game is pretty shit. It's not a great game. I think it's quite good. No, it's shit. No, it's quite good. Everyone just rags on it. It's been so wrong. It's just as bad. It's Final Fantasy 15 as well. That game is dog shit.

I don't know that game's dog shit. I think they're completely dog shit. Here's something for you, right? I've said about this already. Spider-Man's come out and, you know, whatever I'm talking about it. But what I've seen is a lot of people suddenly turning on Batman. Wow, Batman, Arkham games, they were so tedious. The combat was so tedious.

It's like that. Everyone sucked Batman's dick when it came out. Yeah, everyone was riding Batman hard. Like, he was a fucking rich billionaire playboy or some shit. Because I don't think Batman's combat is tedious, like, at all. And I was like, so tedious. Yeah. There's nothing tedious about.

You do it all the time. They probably did because they never got any of the upgrades. You never did any of the cool shit. But it's not spider not. I can fling people. You're fucking shit, mate. They probably went to YouTube and searched like Arkham Asylum Reveal Trail and were like, wow, this looks shit.

And that's their reference point. They're all too young. They weren't there. None of us have played Spider-Man PS4, though, to be fair. I'm not saying Spider-Man's bad. It's just that I've now known. just is Batman hate for some reason. Yeah.

Batman good. Spider-Man. Well, here's the thing, right? Both Batman and Spider-Man have positives and negatives for the, for that type of game. Yeah. So the stealth shit, perfect fit for Batman. Mm-hmm. Right?

But where it's kind of weird and it makes more sense for Spider-Man is in the combat when you're flinging around like crazy. That's perfect for Spider-Man. You're right. You're right. But then that doesn't mean, like, one is best for both. No, the thing is... There's an insect in here.

It might be a wasp. Oh, he is. I've been watching it for ages. You didn't pick up my visible... I don't know if you guys agree. We're going to talk about Spider-Man villains again. Just briefly, the Spider-Man combat in terms of the way it looks isn't quite so impressive.

There's something cool about Batman and how physically imposing and strong here is. so when those punches land it's like yeah and it makes a noise more about yeah it doesn't feel as like rhaus and batman you punch someone in the like when you knock them out that sound yeah there's a big bang and when you do yeah and when you do one of those b y takedowns and you like break all of his limbs my favorite was always hitting an l t y back claw smash the back or smash it's not we need we need i do want to play spider man there yeah yeah so do i have We need one of these games But Batman's, let's be honest, he's pussy

Spider-Man, equally pussy Like when you throw someone off a building A Spider-Man, if you look over the edges Like, oh, he's been webbed, whatever We need a Punisher game Where, like, it's the same combat But instead of knocking them out, it's just P-Ficking their skull and their brains is like

One of the characters you can play as in Batman Yeah, that was lame, like a pre-a-bonus or some shit Yeah, I think I actually was Red Hood, yeah but um do you kill people and punishers way better than redhead as well yeah it is like called on redhead under the redhead

yeah we need a game about the Punisher killing people that already exists it's called hatred well there is a Punisher game that came out you have a hatred there is a PS2 Punisher game it's not very good or anything but it exists and you do kill people in it also

it calls outweighs because like just brutally fucking getting it Speaking of Spider-Man, like the other week, we were watching Spider-Man 3 video game on Wii, like, cutscenes. Because most of us had that game on Wii. And, oh, my God. It's unbelievable. It's so funny, because they have the actual actors do the voice acting as well. Tobin McGuire is just, he's so shit, he's such a terrible actor.

Or maybe he's not terrible, he's just terrible. In that, he's just so unnatural. you know Peter Parker kind of has to be quite like lame yeah and he's perfect for that he takes it too far though he's so lame you know yeah like it's like even when he's spider-man it's like he's still quite lame hey don't do that like he's got his cool suit on and then you hear him speaking it's like I got a knack for that none of us can do an impression this is the last time look but you're cuck in my ass man none of us can do a voice as lame as impossible no he's he's just naturally James

Say, uh, put him down, Doc Ock. I'm sorry. Down, Doc Ock. Okay, that was pretty fucking lame. Put him down, Doc Ock. No, that's not... Too cool. It sounds like Doc O'clock, to be honest.

Doc, cock. Oh. Yeah, those films have a... Dot cock fucks Mary Jane. They're not terrible. They're incredible. They're talking about the Sam Ramey original trilogy of Spider-Man movies. Awesome.

We haven't watched them, like, for the record. We haven't re-watched them, everything. We've just gone... This is what happens. We've been watched on YouTube. All three of them? I watched one and two, and then three are still. How recently is fairly recently?

About a year ago. Really? Yeah. That scene in Spider-Man 3, the Hobgoblin fight, and they're going down an alleyway for like miles. Yeah, that's the thing, though. I think I missed that in Spaddenner 3, and I also skimmed little bits that I remembered really clearly where I watched them so much as children. As children, as a child. When you were young, you were multiple children.

I wasn't and I just formed into one bigger child Three of you, you were kind of like that superhero Shazam Yeah Shazam But yeah I watched them semi recently And I thought they were still pretty good So

Yeah You know What's happened Since we last recorded When was the last time we recorded Quite some time we get It was like last Wednesday I ate a can of beans earlier

Nothing Addicted to beans and rice pudding Say that The racist one You stole my beans No I thought you wanted to say This was eating beans in the theatre

No There's a different one Where it's Johnny Johnny Yes papa You stole my beans Beep

You stole my beans Friend Yeah there you guys Nice I ate some super noodles Nothing much happens to be honest to be honest we're really bad

these guys I don't mean like watch things and listen to things and experience things but last week I've been doing the same one thing

over and over you did one other thing there you watched Thanos and Fortnite again I watched Infinity War for the third time

I've seen it three times now I've seen it once yep yep no one's gonna disagree that one I've seen it once

we got the oneers we got the oners we got the oneers we got the two us and we got the three is over here one two four now we just need a fourer argis watched it four times argue's probably seen it well he's probably seen it twice yep

well this cast is kind of awful there's no there's no memes it's just like yeah it's a problem when your host fucking doesn't direct anything no you commit I'm not moving I ain't budging Unless you want to sit on my lap

I mean what's up guys We've been moving on Okay, what's up guys What's up ladies and gentlemen Welcome to this episode of the JAR Media podcast What are you doing with the mic James you just stopped hosting it

So you actually You couldn't even make it to part two No Just fucking leave the mic You don't leave it alone. Do you know what my plan was? I only wanted to host to make a bear be of a killer weapons. You could have done that if you weren't hosting.

I don't know that. There's no communication in jar media. We just all like... You don't need to have a fucking mic in your mouth like that. You've got to be able to fit... There's no communication. There's no communication with a couple of fists or whatever, you know? When our gym's the host, we can finally get back on track.

Good afternoon, morning, evening or night, ladies and ladies. Welcome back to reload animal... Shut up. Shit. listen we got a lot of energy I fucking hate it when Jim just sits there right listen

Jim you've got no energy no none of us if you let me talk maybe I could you've been sitting James you need to look this is like when you're driving to Tesco right and then your friend is like can we quick pop to McD's and you're like sure okay here we are McD's what do you want

nah I don't want anything I'll have a bottled water, please Yeah, you're like, dude, bottled water Tesco has bottled water And you, you're the bottled water in this scenario Alright? So now that we're back on track How we doing, ladies and gentlemen You remember when we just got in James' car and you just started driving

That was yesterday, yeah, I do remember No, and then we were like James was like, where are we going? And we were like, just go where the road takes us So it went to a roundabout came back I decided I was supposed to describe

what a roundabout is for Americans do they have roundabouts no are you sure they have a roundabout somewhere in the country I thought they didn't I thought it was like this there's that joke in the Simpsons where they're like what's this roundabout thing

oh oh my I guarantee you somewhere in America there's a bounder around because they go to London well yeah of course there's a roundabout you know outside airport so you sometimes see in America there's just a massive fucking roundabout

but they probably don't think it's a roundabout they probably think it's an ass car track. Oh, James is firing shots at US motorsports. Oh, James. James, when did you learn to be such a fucking badass? The moment. I started doing exercise. 100 squats a day.

100 squats a day makes your bum just... You doing 100 squats a day? Huh? You doing 100 squats a day? Yeah, we're doing it for like three weeks. James... James, go to work in front of the camera and prove your worst. Do a squat, James.

I'm not doing a squat. I'm too embarrassed. Go over there and do 100 squats. I'm not doing 100 squats. We talk about something. No. Hello 5, so. You build into it, you know.

What? So Luke Cage Season 2 came out a little while ago. No. Let's give some opinions. We're not talking about Marvel. None of us have watched it. Have you watched it? No.

I was just, I was hoping and that fucking failed. James, get back in the seat. We've been... It's just falling apart without James' as the host. Yeah. I'm not, no. I'm the worst. toast. I don't want to. I don't have anything to talk about at the moment.

Sometimes you've got to go off the train tracks. You know, you've got you know, do it like you was. What? On a Saturday afternoon. I've got to go off those train chains. Let's just have James talk metaphorically for... Who's the train driver?

None of us at a moment. Who's a conductor? Who's a ticket inspector? James is a ticket inspector. And which one's the passenger. I'm obviously the passenger on this boat. Who's the one that's shoveling coal? Yeah.

You three are shoveling coal. I'm making the money. What? There's no money in train. This is the money train baby. Whoop, whoop. This is what happens. This is what happens what? This is what? Did another burp.

This is what happens. All right, I'm going on Reddit. Go on with it then. Go look at fucking 60 frames per second, Paul, and like, I always see you do. I love the way James project. I love the way James projecting R-slash 60 FPS porn or something. I know about it.

Like seeing, like, 60 frames a second, like, porn is really weird. It's just like, whoa. What's this with this obsession with 60 frames a second? I don't know. We're watching Angry Joe last night and... What's with the 60 frames? No, no. Let me stop you like that. You've started off, Wong, because you started with you watching Angry Joe.

That's where you've gone, Wong. Leave him alone. Well, no, he gets respect because he was in that shitty, um, that shitty, uh, nostalgia critic movie, which is the best part. Shut up, We've been. Yeah, we're talking about the 60 frame per second movement. In terms of what? Your eyes can't even...

YouTube videos. They're beautiful. When you see Angry Joe's jugular fucking waving... Leave him alone. To be honest, your eyes can't... Jim, your eyes can't see past 47 frames per second, so it doesn't matter. I'm going to fuck your mouth in 60 frames per second. See if you hear that, bitch.

I probably will. It's just like gaming thing, isn't it? Yeah, it's snobbery. That's what it is. But, like, real life isn't gaming. Real life is infinite frames. It's how high you are, depending on how many you see. So if you're zonked, you're going to see about 1,000 frames a second. Well, anyway, I'm on the Reddit and I'm, you know...

Yeah, what is there? Well, there's lots of stuff, but, like, we're not even at Part 2. As far as I know. Well, Alex has a topic for Part 2 that he's saving, and we can't discuss that. Okay. If the cast turned to a battle royale of all the Jarmedia characters, who would win? Me, because I have a car. That's not how fights work. Well, none of us can shoot guns.

None of us have the will to kill at anyone. Oh, that's a real game is like 50% RNG. You're psycho. Well, they said characters anyway. We're not characters, we're real. We've got Dick the Head, we got Schwepp, we got... All right. The dinosaurs and stuff.

We got that comedian, the goatsy comedian. Surely cyborg would win. That's true, but then I think Richard Hammond books sounds a good chance. No, he's useless. What about a zombie helmet? What about broken Spartan helmet? No, he's irrelevant. Zombie Pigman?

Baby Jesus We've got a solid chance We littered the baby Jesus there Yeah but he gets killed anyway Yeah he does die He fucking dies like early on It's looking like cyborg What about SpongeBob?

He has outlived a lot of those characters there He dies in the SpongeBob movie No he doesn't He's revived He does die for a bit though doesn't he Yeah but then a tear And then a light and then it You know

That's when I discovered My Have Emotions was that movie Mm-hmm Yeah You know that movie You didn't discover your emotions until you were like 15 years old. That's what I mean when I watched the Sponshop. You weren't 15 when we watched that shit.

It came out in 2004 or five. I'm joking. I don't fucking know. Bitch. Why'd have ruined my joke? Well, that's my duty. Jokes have to be funny. And based in reality.

I was based in reality. For example, um... Mad men, right? Knock, knock. Who's her? Madman? Europe. Who's that, Europe?

Europe, who? Wow, that was rude. Someone better go get the camera. You get the joke? Well, we're in the break now, hey. Did you get the joke? Europe, who? You're a poo.

You are a poo. Welcome back to Papa John's Pizza episode 673. On this episode, we've just been fired from our own company for saying the N-word. so actually the thing I teased beforehand my subject is one James is going to have a lot to do this is the first half of Alex

yeah I throughout just incredible diverse history I've never had anything to say to anything because the first 100s episode was Marvel and I've had so many people tell me that they just stopped watching because it was just fucking shit and now that's just not true

no I've no joke said had so on a friend of mine say that he stopped watching Jha because it's every series the same. It was always as Marvel movies and he stopped watching. All right, well, his loss. Yeah, his last. He's fucking gained

from stopping watching us. Stop being on it, then we'll have him on the cast to sit it here. James! You'd actually hit the camera, James. Anyway, the socks are coming off next. My topic. Can you get your dick out?

James, don't get your dick out. I can't have you once, I don't mind. It's so small. We'll love to upload this one to porn habit. That would perfectly cover it. I think anyway. So anyway the tease, right? Yeah I want to rank

the main themes from Smash Bros. From 64 all the way to Ultimate. Well, I hate Smash. I don't care. I don't know if you hate it. No, I don't hate it. Now, do we need to overall agree

upon the order? I bet you'd love it if you had a switch. Or do we make our own? Well, I can't play fighting games because my hands do not work like that. Okay. That's just a But okay. What do you mean it's like? No, you're shit at fighting games And you're embarrassed to admit it

I'm shit at fighting games Because I can't play them Oh, that's the reason My fucking head can't get past That's a narcissistic attitude And I want you to stop When we first played Killer Instincts I was better than you

Can you sing the mad men theme to me? Oh yes, and he's falling Yeah Anyway, yeah So did Jim, what did you say Jim? He said, do we have to agree upon a list Or do we have to make our own

We've got a vote. It's the three of us. I can vote. I heard. I have ears. I can have an opinion on music. Do we go worse to best? We need a bit of paper.

Should we just say the one? There's only five of them. Yeah. So, for the worst, does this is the worst one we start with? The one we like the least or whatever. We're all in agreement. 64 is at the bottom.

Yes. It's not bad. It's just very of the time. Yeah. And then I think after that we're probably in agreement that it's Smash. We're you. again not bad wait when that's when I walked in on and that one sounded pretty good I'm not saying it's bad towards the end but I don't think it's the it's the most

mixed one I'd say yeah yeah I really like it's main like composition bit yeah yeah but everything around it especially that weird guitar bit wasn't feeling that just after the guitar bit was quite good mm-hmm just after it was good stop it you little bitch this and then number three is when it gets tricky yeah because yeah this is the issue right so we got we what we have left and what is the list basically. Melee brawl ultimate, right? Yeah. And this is the issue.

What is our gut feeling? My gut feeling in going up three to one, ultimate melee brawl. See, I'd go, I think melee ultimate brawl. I just said that.

No, you said... I said ultimate melee brawl, sorry. All right. Yeah. But then what are we ranking me on are we ranking them on the quality of the piece of music because if it was that broad just went yeah but it's is it how well it fits into the game how how well you think it encapsulates the idea of what smash pros represents to me it's just like cool piece of music that's what i'm based well to me it's like what a bit of both yeah is what what will get you hyped the most on that pause menu well not pause menu but like when you first boot up the game that was that was a

separate piece of music though for brawl he's digging around in the bin again what do you mean the theme in brawl was different on the main menu no i mean but when you boot up the game but it was the same for mele as well the melee menu was different yeah you understand what i'm saying when you boot up the game you see this this is where we don't know we don't know how ultimate is going to introduce it to us oh oh yeah we don't know how it looks brawl is a piece of me i don't think anything's gonna top that that's just but here's the thing right

think brawl the brawl song is the best piece of music but i don't think it necessarily encapsulates i don't think melly really does either smash bros this is why this is why i think i think i disagree with you because i think brawl what what is smash bros at its core a bunch of beings just smashing each other about just yeah smash smash smash smash but it's inherently it's inherently kind of goofy kind of silly it and brawl is so it's such an epic piece of music, it's almost too epic. No, the subspace is, um...

It takes itself very seriously. There's no dialogue. Yeah, but when Mario looks at the camera, he's not like... You know that bit? Crying when Luigi does, yeah. I can't remember if a link on Mario and one of them sees him and he starts running like, you've got my princess! And they run it and they're

like, actually we're friends. And that's the end of that fight. It's pretty awesome, huh? It's fucking intricate. But like, think about that piece of music. we just listen to for Fountain of Dreams from melee. That is just amazing and it's just for like It's from Kirby, yeah. Goofy fight

on a goofy stage based on Kirby. Brawl wins, end of. Personally, I think killer instinct wings because in terms of music, killer instinct is... Killer instinct does have great fighting music. We'll not take that away from it. And it's got better gameplay. I still think.

Apples and oranges, James. Okay. Whatever, James doesn't exist. of watching something that's interesting and fun and high octane super smash pros does not give that off it is high oh it is pros yes ridiculous have you seen that one I think it's just two like foxes of falcas doing the exact same thing all the way around final destination then back up onto top of it mm-hmm ridiculous ridiculous and there's obviously the wombo combo the famous combo mm-hmm mm-hmm yeah interesting

you with a wombo combo so what's our final list then I'd say oh I'm going to agree with one of you. Okay. So whoever I agree with wins. Yes. So. So, I have an opinion.

He said his before yours. Ultimate Malay Brawl. And then I said mine was... You said yours was Melet Ultimate Brawl. Yeah. So whoever I side with gets the win. Unless I completely change it up. This isn't...

This isn't... Hmm. The thing is, the actual quality of the melee soundtrack, like the way it sounds, because it's such an old game, to me, sounds a little bit worse. But then again, no, I'm going to have to say Ultimate Mele Brawl. Okay. I have a feeling that Ultimate... That is a...

Read my badge. Uber ponage. Yes. I'm feeling that once Ultimate's out there and we've had it. for a while. I'm still gonna have Brawl and mele tracks like primarily on my stages.

Brawl has a special place in my heart and I'm not sure if I have a bias leading brawl I played both of them though when I was younger. I got melee and then I got brawl and that came out. I didn't get one of it. I got melee just so saw it in a fucking game shop and I was like that looks cool. There's Link and

Mario fighting. We had it set anyway so it would play melee and Brawl's music anyway on the main menu. Yeah I had that. I just think So I never knew there was any difference. Sounds like it sticks more, you know? The melee one. Yeah, it's got bits in it.

Compared to what? Compared to ultimate. Yeah. Where to me, like, I remember listening to it for the first time back at home. I'm just like, it's not really taking me anywhere. Yeah. I hear that. Really, you don't think the layers as it goes along, especially towards the end.

I don't find them as... I don't think I actually made it to the end. I don't find them as... That's a bit. That's the whole point. As mele's. I don't find it anywhere near as distinct as the movie as mele goes through. I've already forgotten the melee one.

I can't recall any of them right now over the brawl. Brawl is the only thing to go around my head right now. I find it hard to hum the brawl one as well. Okay. That's it. I remember the one from the main menu. Which is just that. Like a simplified version or something.

I remember the little lead in. It starts quiet. Going through the menus really quick, and it'll just be like, n-n-it, and then you're just being in a game. Shout out to Ultimate for clearly having the best UI. Does it? Mm-hmm. Yeah.

I haven't seen it. Best UI, and you can actually set it so it's automatically on stock now instead of... I'm having to change it. Really? Time, yeah. Yeah, why the fuck was it... No one wants to do time. It's three-stock.

Or two-stock, three-stock or five stock. That seems to what everyone likes. Yeah. I used to do 99 stock. fights just to try and like pass time. That's what I do. And I was okay. Fair play. Yeah, we did that a few times. Anyway, this is the part of the show where we head over the jarreddit. Hopefully we'll talk about some more smash bros. Hopefully not. And we can talk about the fucking toge racing in Japan if you want

because you'd find that fucking boring. There's four people on this car's not free. 3V1 bitch. There's a, it's a subject people want to hear. People, no one cares about a stupid Japan car. Yeah, maybe gives a shit about cars and racing and Tokyo drifting. More people fucking. Loads of people give a shit about that. You got to say more people care about it than Smash. I had the Reddit open as well. There was one I saw it.

Well, Smiley's going to sell like a thousand copies. Who the fuck gives it shit? If you want to leave your own questions for us to answer, head over to the Jail Media Reddit. And we might answer it. Or whatever. I want to start with this one, right?

From that underscore other underscore Dan. I see what you're doing there, that other Dan. What happened to James's Catgirl statue from episode 23? Shithead Larry once out. okay okay there's a second yeah what did happen to it's been under my desk ever since okay also has the tank been completed yet of course I know as someone on the Reddit

it's been so long that the train sorry the was it a tank yeah it's so long that it's the people are forgetting what the vehicle is I said train because someone in the Reddit said when is the train gonna be built it's been two years two years this I really thought James would do it over like he's got a lot of time No, no, no, because at that point I didn't

because I was at a shit job. Yeah. And then I changed to another shit job. So I haven't had the time, and now I've got... And now, now, now I've got... James, that's... I've got, like, I've got fucking accountancy work. Lean around to their left ears.

He's going to lean around into their right ears. Exactly, I'm an natural born an ASMR artist. Okay, continue. Jesse OS has a good one here. What do you guys do when it? It's midnight and you can't sleep. It doesn't have to necessarily be midnight. Just, I guess, can't sleep.

I don't... Well, there's an obvious answer. Fucking coming naturally relaxes your body and helps you sleep. It depends. I haven't really been having trouble sleeping lately, but when I used to, I would just follow this thing. Not blaming... Because if you beat yourself up for not being able to sleep,

you just make it worse, because you're like, why can't I sleep? Why can't I do this? I'm weird, and you make it worse for yourself. So the best one's do is just not... If it's really bad, you can't sit like a whole hour. I guess you just have to get up for a little bit, do something and think about to sleep. Maybe read.

I've never had it. Not look at screens. Yeah, I've never had it severely at all. I mean, I had four days and not been out to sleep. That was pretty terrible. That was terrible. You just need to, well, there's one of the big reasons while some people would not be asleep, but before they go to bed, they lay in bed, look at their phone, then turn it off and try to sleep.

I remember. You can't sleep like that. Well, I mean, I managed to now. turn your mind off. But I, I don't know, I guess I'm really used to it. I always put it on the nighttime screen thing, so you have the dimmer screen, and it's always really, but I, I do like, duolingo before I go to bed, which was like the best time to do it, apparently, is before bed, do your, do your duolingo. So, that's just, I just pop onto YouTube and watch some chill vids. And then I, um, I put headphones there when I go to sleep. I don't listen to music,

but just something to block out, so all I can hear is like the sound of my own body or whatever, which is like, that helps me. Well, so if I can't sleep, I just, I just listen to ESMR. Yeah, actually, what kind? Like, tapping stuff. Tapping? Really? But then, but then it gets the point where I'll wake up, I'll wake up like two in the morning,

because there's like a, I'm laying on one of the ear plugs. It's like causing intense pains. I'm just like, shit. I have a system worked out to stop that where I have one arm under the pillow. So there's a soft, like, triangle between my arms, where my ear sort of is. Does your arm never go to, like, sleep? No I've always still like that

With one hour under the pillow So Hmm Yeah I cut the blood circulation Out of my arm If I do that My um

I can I see it The key is to have it like this You can have it like that Then yeah It always happens If I have it like this It doesn't

That's all I always work up with the headphones Not in my ears as well They're just like Fucking somewhere They're somewhere In your butt Tangled up and off the fucking ball

They've actually like Split now Because they're an old pair And I just managed To rip one whole ear out apparently when i was like let on it and just rolled it and just tore it out of the rest of their fans what are you jim what do you do i don't try to sleep if i'm not tired i hear that jim just goes what she's like madmen i get stressed about not being out like sleeping there

no i i stay awake until my body's like you can't yeah go to bed so then i just go to bed and i remember during i had the after my during my four-day stint my four-day stint of insomnia I remember getting up out of bed at like two I tried to go to bed I think I may have fallen asleep for like 10 minutes or something a bit and I've been like never mind and I got up at like two or three in the morning and I played

I played Halo Reach and just played Halo Reach for like no reason and then I did like laundry at university at like five in the morning it was really weird and all that I was so tired being immensely tired is awful it kind of feels like being drunk

but like worse probably it is worse yeah yeah at least being drunk the choice I did reach on heroic as well well really tired I played for reach on heroic on my own it's pretty impressive baby game it's a fucking awesome game

I have a good sleeping routine at moment so I'm yeah I'm pretty I'm pretty solid on that any like particularly good ones I had a little look but which rage comic face would you be well James's troll face we know this James is the troll face if he was a rage face comic no I'd be the um rage comic face sorry rage comic face I'm firing my laser that's a shit question that is a shit question and I have a good for a good one okay can't take it away one bring it on alone now says one and

someone right underneath called Alpha Jarlang asked something pretty similar. Yeah. How long does a JARCast slash an I-H-E video take to edit? And the other question was, what is the editing process with the jarcos? I was just on those two as well. It takes about, you know, day and a bit sometimes. Depends how... You know, four days normally?

It actually takes, like, the whole, like, a whole seven days after. Depends how crazy we can go with the editing. If we're hiring fucking jets and crashing them into the set, you know, it's a bit fucking... Oh, shit. Wait, did I... You did? I did that, didn't that? I said my meme show.

You know, it takes a lot sometimes, so, you know, we are hard on the grind. To be serious, though, um... Five minutes? Yeah, it depends. You can do it really quickly, or, um, I sometimes, um... I don't know other things going on will go through the entire episode. Um... I've been little cheeky things in.

Putting little cheeky things in, like, the, that soundy episode is like the fucking best one. I've only ever done things like at the start, like, the first 10 minutes at most and after that i lose like i just lose like i just don't concentrate anymore i just lose like okay whatever my brain's slipping away to something else now and that's it but i haven't done that for a long time my favorite one i doubt it took very long to edit but um you like reversed all the colors and had like three gifts at the bottom and then you blame me feds hang it hey that was a good one come on when someone infuriated people so much that they someone downloaded it

uninverted it and uploaded it and said look here's the link for the actual one that is amazing I just like the bar wearing high heels and the alien the barb wasn't moving yeah there have been some good ones over the

years now over the decades I can't wait till jar hits a decade well what about I cheezer and notes uh the editing bits actually the quickest bit for me

yeah because like I've seen it right he just gets on his desk squats big poo on his keyboard wait I've got one of these done

you're standing standing desk so I can do squats while I edit can you stop mocking my squats I'm gonna have a fucking solid ass and you guys are gonna be so fucking jealous I wasn't mocking a squat

I've already got a juicy ass yeah I've got the juicest ass that's because you've both got weight and I haven't had weight to get a juicy off it's not because I've It's because I have a natural juicy

So do I I've always had it Why just squats though I'm getting hung up on Yeah that's what's funny Because most people do the opposite Most people forget leg day Yeah every day is leg day for you

You gotta do squats You gotta do push-ups Go do your tricep dips It's to start Pull-ups So once that's good I can just go into the other stuff It's just

It takes fucking months and years to do So I'm just going with what Why just do 100 squats Why not do like 50 squats? whats and 50 push-ups or something well you've got to realize is my room is the size of that fucking table so I can't exactly do push-ups is that so your bed is like I physically can't lay down on my floor enough to do it because there's not enough room and just go somewhere else and do them then no do it in my garage

you do them in my house it's not embarrassing this is just walking into the living room which is the biggest in my house and just go to do some fucking wait until they go to sleep that's what I did I started doing push-ups when I was 13 14 just like I couldn't do more than 20 a day so I do 20 a day and then before you know it I'm doing 450 that's well well shit no no I did used to do that when I was 13 14 wow I was just like I'm gonna do push-ups and then I did 20 a day and then I was I was doing like 70 a day and then and then school ended and I was like Fuck it.

I just started even fucking dominoes every day. And then all of your lives has just gone downhill since and I'm on the fucking uphill. Not true. Not since school. Mine was, that was the lowest point my whole fucking life thing. I'm talking about in terms of exercise.

Do you all do exercise now? Yeah. I do more than you. How much you do? I do more than you. What do you do? I'll go in the gym. That I could go to a gym.

I can just walk in an hour. You got to explain. You want me to run. through my routine because that's a little bit cringe well you fucking get pulls his pants down into the fucking bathroom boys bench press shoulder press bicep curls uh this other one that i can't describe another one i don't know what because i've only been going for like three months and before that whenever i've gone i've never gone consistently enough or anything to happen so are you going to go consistently yes the rest of your life yes jim what you do i also do leg press you'll get

You'll pass in this test. And I do carve raises. I do like 15,000 steps a day. That's not enough. Apart from the days when I sleep. Apart from the days when I sleep. But then it's back to like the same shit. You can't do that for the rest of your life, can you?

Because that's dependent on job. That's the most like. But you're not going to get ripped from that, are you? It's the most realistic. You're going to stay healthy. It's why I've lost like a stone in the past six months. Can I have that stone teeth? But do you feel good for you?

in a stone? Or did you prefer having a stone be in a stone heavier? I don't know. It feels exactly the same. Or do you want to be jilled? Yeah. Do it. Do what? Moving on.

What does he want? He wants me to shoot him with my handgun and I'm asking to move on because I'm not going to shoot him. Well, we have a question here from this is an egg who says When you were kids

Did you ever do anything extremely odd For example My brother Loll time to expose him Used to run around our house In his underwear And my mum's high-heeled shoes

While singing this SpongeBob Square Pants theme song It was epic One of our fans Like probably used to like One on naked or something When it wasn't a Batman Like he went

He went outside in like The Summer just sprinting Along the road naked with just the Batman capable. How old would he have been then? Like 12. No, not 12. He's only than that, surely.

It was in primary school. 10. I can't remember. I'm younger than 10. You must have 10. It was like 7. Because that would be quite like... Well, you know, I did it sometimes.

When I was young, I sometimes just sleep with my dog in his bed. He's quite comfortable. I don't feel like that that's weird though. Well, it's like when you get a nightmare, it's like, I can't go upstairs for pounds, so I'll just go lay with my dog. Apparently my dog. facial expressions my early facial expressions were learned from Thomas the tank engine so I just do like weird shit like that because all the trains were just like yeah

they've got like four frames for the different apparently that's what I'd do um when I was quite young three or four just smoke loads of weed addicted to token I fucking loved it I bet Alex had some weird shit oh yeah he's Why does bicycle, like blindfolded it? Really? What? How would you know that? We, we pooed in the garden and our dog ate it.

That's the best one. That's not funny. I feel like we've mentioned it before. Yeah, we've mentioned all this shit before. You pissed in the marble run. You. Why? I feel like we've mentioned that as well before.

I don't know this one. Why did you piss in the marble run? I think I've said this as well, but it was in a, like a plastic barrel for some reason so it was like well that barrel forever stank of piss as well

I think it's still in like garage or whatever it's gross um that's the new jar pop pop you need to go find it with the pissy marble it was like this white barrel

with a red top it was quite strange it was just the top looked like a cog yeah why did you piss in it what was your thinking Alex loved pissing in things He pissed in a bin

Multiple bins Yeah I'm pretty sure Do you not just ever walk up Just sink And it's like almost cock high And you just think I'm just gonna take a piss in it

Always I have and I sometimes do it It's just like That's gross That's why you wash your hands Don't do that It's my sink That doesn't matter

You're gonna get piss on your hands You run the tap Exactly And if you're going for a silent piss At night Well piss in the toilet And flush it Like fucking whatever

rim. We could just piss into my mom. There's piss in the toilet. I got very used to just pissing in the sink. What the fuck? Have you ever pissed in the sink? You don't know that. Am I alone in this? I think you are.

I've had the... I just turn on the tap and piss. That's fucked. At night I'm normally so delirious. I just default to the toilet, so... But you have pissed in a sink is what you're saying. Well, I probably have. I can't remember when.

No, but... These two are saying in their adult life. Yeah? I've done it in my bloody sink downstairs in the kitchen. Just went downstairs one morning. You strike me as someone that cares about your cleanliness. Yeah. And yet you're pissing where you wash your hands.

No, because I run the tap. It's going down the train hole. It doesn't touch anything. And then I streamline the washing the piss off my dick process as well then. I don't understand. Where's the link of, why would urine get on your hands? Yeah. All your hands touch.

is the... The cock. The metal of the tap and then the water. Molecules splashing. Yeah, but if we're going to that level, I mean, there's probably all sorts of horrible bacteria around sinks anyway. No, but this is your place to wash your hands, you know? Nothing puts you off about pissing in that...

Well, James, I don't put my hands in the sink and rub my hands around. No, but the water that you're... You're splashing up and hitting your hands touches the same spot that your piss is touching. But the piss goes down the... It touches the water. and the water touches the sink. No, Jim, you're touching it straw. I'm hot, I'm not.

Okay. Yes. Does that mean because I shave in the stink, I'm washing my hands in hair? No? Shaving isn't like tiny liquid molecules. No, tiny hairs. It's kind of gross. The liquid molecules run down the drain with the water from the tap.

If you go in that sink. But you wash your hands of warm water and soap to kill the bacteria. Anyway, yeah, sorry, Jim. You've just been. No, you guys. No, we only care about. Go to a hospital and see if you can piss in the sink and they're okay with that. We care about facts, not feelings.

And the facts are laying on my shoulders. I thought you were Ben Shapiro. I'm launching facts your way and you guys are fucking delusional. Turns out, you're just Ben Shapen. I'm the host of this show and what I say matters. Jim, do people put their penises in bones? It sounds like Alex Films. You could have just said, I'm the host of this show.

Exactly. And what I say matters. James is right. Penises do go in bums. So why would it matter if you're pissing in a sink? Because you wash your penis in the shower And you're putting your penis So I'm on poos

And What? You don't put your hands You don't wash your hands You don't wash your hands In people's assholes Oh shit Pissy sink joins the brawl

Dick and ass joins the fight Might be able to sneak one more in Dick and ass fucks the fight Dick and ass is the fight. Yeah, yeah. Uh, one more quickly here. Happy Satan 999 says, What do you hate the most about England compared to other countries?

Off. You guys. Wheeh! What if we went to another country? Yeah, you'd still be with us. Well then I'd be here and I'd be happy. England, compared to other countries. I haven't lived in other countries.

Well, to be honest, I'm just going to stay up say to recently. recently. Shit reason. She's fit. Can we mention what James said right before we press record again? It's probably the best James moment of all time. Yeah, what did he say? It was funny, but I don't remember.

Jim, like, insulted James. And without missing a beat, James spins around. Yeah, Jim said, your shit. And then Jim said, you're, well, your face is shit. No, he said, your shit. your face yeah that was so quick that makes no sense of it but jim was like but you no i just burst into fucking laughing immediately that was hilarious it was said

with such fire as well really aggressive not even thinking it was like you've had that prepared or something yeah i do i have them all laid out months but Anyway, what are we talking about? What's bad about England in the last 20 seconds? Well, we don't actually have any free speech laws. It's pretty bad. The weather, it's pretty rubbish. Yeah, that's probably the bang-on answer, right there.

The people are fucking useless. Yeah. I mean, look at us. Yeah, look at what we're doing. Hey, I'm pretty productive. You know what's good about England, though? Music. Pink Floyd.

We're good in music David Belly, Beatles Beatles Queen The movie looks quite good I saw a clip of it Oh Jim Ah my fucking

The camera's gone out guys No one can see what's happening No don't Oh James come No James don't James don't Oh come man James stop pissing in the sink

I can't fill it back up here Because the fucking bottom won't fit under the thing.