JAR Media Posdact - the FINAL afternoon...

Episode Date: February 3, 2025

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Find us on Spotify and iTunes under: "Jar Media Posdact" Find the original episodes under: "The JARChive" Timecodes: 00:00 Intro 09:13 Housekeeping 21:48 Alex has figured out how to be Normal 25:36 The Flee Flee 34:59 Mid Break 36:28 The Final Afternoon 49:11 Don't even TRY IT 54:02 Bioware is back! 1:01:33 The Final Message

Yeah Rui Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Ree Tottie Dottie. Didn't Wallace go out with Tottie? Tottie. Tottie? Oh, Lady Tottingham. Is that what? He calls her totty, right? There's something like that.

Tot. Oh, Wallace. Oh, Wallace, lick it, will you? Isn't it cheesy, Wallace? Oh, dude. Well, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, what was that? Hmm? I haven't...

Introing. I just... I hate introing. Aww. I find it hard. It's difficult. You know, we don't talk about how difficult it is to do this. You know, we don't spend enough time talking about how difficult it is to do this. Yeah.

It's really difficult to do what dream the use. Dream the YouTuber singer does. Yeah, I want to cheat at speed running. Yeah, I want to pretend to accidentally cheat at speed running and then make music. Oh yeah, I forgot he's a musically. My, uh, my Marvel rivals main is Dream. That's funny, because my Marvel rivals is meme is nightmare. What? You okay? can you can you at least do you can do good afternoon and evening and i'll do the others good afternoon morning evening or night and let's get right into the news i feel like that's too extra that's like a level of coordination where it's like it's almost like false advertising

yeah it feels like performative and fake yeah and we hate performance i i i um so symbiotically simultaneously despise both realness and fakeness yeah it's an awkward equilibrium or like thereof yeah well I hate being real

but I hate being fake yeah and it has to flip on a dime as well and then when you start being real then first chance to flip it yeah yeah yeah and vice versa yeah yeah so you're constantly He's just bouncing back and forth. No, this one I have is, um, like,

if I'm asked to do something menial, that I was going to do anyway. Yeah. I will say I'm not going to do it. Even though I'd still, I'll do it. But I'll say, I'll verbalise that I'm not doing that. Or just saying, no, just saying the inverse, just for the sake of it. Yeah.

Just for saying it's sake. Yeah, it's like the, when, when you have no choice, but like you want to rebel, you know? Yeah. You want to be like, I'm, I'm number of. one the instinct to rebel yeah it's in our British DNA to just be punks yeah that's why you come here punk behavior punk attitude and bichy punk goodness i think by croakie is the least punk yeah term ever conceived i don't think i've ever heard anyone say that outside of

that that's like his catchphrase i've heard one other person say that that. Say by kriky. Yeah. No, not by kriky, but crikey. Kriky, yeah. I've heard kriky, but not by kriky. But I mean, in person. Is it more of a British thing or a kiwi thing? It's definitely more like, Steve Owen. Oh, of course, yeah. But they're the bi-kriky, a bisexual kriky. By-crock. Bifobic, kriky?

Very focal kriky. Oh, not focal This episode we're going to talk about focal lengths Yeah What's your favourite F stop? Um 15 I mean F stop

Don't You can't record smoke anymore Or is that steam It's smoke? No, that's steam I'm beckoning to the water What are those called? What is that?

An indent stick Oh, the incensed stick huh do you know where I buy him the shop how did you know that educated guess my friend

can we do a whole episode where it's like coordinating like finishing each other's words okay scrap that fucking awful idea okay did I said a butt

shirt That one went well You said you didn't want to do that I wanted to do a whole episode in my language Why don't you want to do that I've done it before Me haven't yes I have Maybe that's like sick of it I'm fucking sick of it

Okay maybe not maybe not for a whole cast But how about Jaffter hours in my language Not this week another day Another time Okay only if it's two hours Can you withstand 10 minutes of my made up language That's gonna be the challenge okay

and can we converse well let's no let's let's let's let people decide if they want if they want that also they have to be aware that when you say made up language it's nothing it's like like

like like Tolkien made a language he made up a language he created a language you just make noises it's what you might like that um before we get too deep into

is that racist to who what language is that that is oh come on um i rest my case yeah before we get too deep into the show let me just uh let's get right end of the news yeah um i guess this is the part we thank the patrons over at the patreon and then i i thank them in my made-up language Better be that boy Bad a bitum boy Um That's god

That's so much easier to do Than the normal way I do it What a relief Well that was me just like condensing it Like I've done it Oh okay Thanks for the patrons Bada Bid that boy

Bada Bidum boy Uh huh You know the rest Yeah you know the regular role at this point No I gotta do it You have to do it It's that annoying thing about YouTube Where it's like call to arms

actually work call to arms you know like they call it's not normally called call to arms because that's quite a violent way of phrasing it I mean more um call to action yeah that's how they say it let's say call to arms though because that's cool

um your right to bear call to arms so what do you actually get over there on the Patreon well I tell you so fucking much so much yeah I've had to make a list otherwise I forget I always forget to mention things like uh first off you get you make the show and audio version

possible. Full stop. Full stop. You get the raw, unfiltered MP3. Also add free. Don't forget about that. Yeah, full stop. Then there's the patron names, debiterer above, on the first or second week of each month. We're recording this on the 30th,

and I don't like doing the next month's one when we're still in the previous month as of recording it, even though you're in the new month now as you're hearing it. So get those names in if you're a debiterer above. We'll be reading those next episode. Full stop. Full stop. on Patreon. We already mentioned it a little bit. It's kind of a extra show thing that people

seem to be enjoying. What we've done lately, we did Better Man, the controversial Robbie Williams movie that's like a half an hour full review over on there, all this Wallace and Gromit content that's up on there. I might make one of those public soon. And even when we don't have a full ja after hours, I've been cutting out, instead of just deleting things out of the episode and losing them to the ether, I've been putting them on Patreon. Like last episode, early on, when we were recording, my, what, our mother, called me on the phone asking about Pizzi. I cut that out, put it on the Patreon, people seem to enjoy Mama Belkman's Pizzi moment. Everyone likes Pizzi.

Everyone likes Pizzi. And finally, JAR Media Group Chat, another feature over on there. Before we go and record, I'll chuck a little message in there asking for ideas and things to talk about. Get it nice and fresh. And we can go into housekeeping now with one of these patron chat messages from D.E. Zeroni, Phoebser, who says, do you even need to ask for suggestions this time, unless you plan on ignoring the elephant in the subreddit, so to speak? You know, you don't know?

I don't know. Good. Put a pin in that. We'll come back to that in a bit. Doing. You got some other housekeeping sitting first. That's the sound of a pen being put in it. No, wait, hold up.

You can't hear me do my little doin't, like four times. It wasn't good enough. The funny little sound effect and then you just go and like destroy it. It was like a perfect cartoon. No, I'm not doing it again. That's like you can't embarrass. That's, yeah, that's brutal.

Can, okay. Edit it so that your one is on all of mine and then my one is on yours. I might do that. Zellington O commenting on the, I don't know, we've had kind of some different crazy angles the past few weeks.

we've we've been low now we're going high you know we've been low now we're going high it's like a wavelength well like Michelle Obama they go low we go high or whatever what I know um this angle makes me feel like those jarlings that list all the episodes with feet in them and now the itching won't stop because I guess you could only see my feet sees from behind cherries go check out the video version of the previous episode if you don't know what I'm talking about. Ryan Coomber says, at a buffet, I personally sneak

corn dogs into the buffet so others can enjoy them. I hide six corn dogs in my jacket pockets. It then is a joy for me to see other patrons of the establishment, eat my corn dogs, thinking they were part of the buffet. Lie. Creative lie, but a lie.

Yes. No one buys corn dogs. Yeah, they do. No, they don't. Americans do. We have corned They don't. They're corn dogs are offered everywhere in America and nobody buys them. They're like a quick improv weapon.

Yeah. They're just something they have to differentiate themselves. Shit, we're America, we're this new country. What can we make? Just make anything. Oh, I've got some sand and a sausage. We have one of lots of thing, that being corn. Yeah.

We have corn reduced to sand. used to sand and sausages um i noticed gremie jame i guess he's got multiple accounts because he was commenting on like different named accounts this one is gremie jame three right this is the one who lost their mind right one of the ones there are two currently that are losing their mind oh okay he's losing his mind less he's the one who's an ai tendril probably right right gramie jame three might even i thought gremie jame was the one who couldn't handle not being read like having their question yeah not read yeah yeah and they're losing their mind yeah yeah but that's like tame compared to what's been going on in

okay fucking universe um but he says go higher so Grammy get what you want we're lower though you're higher from the video perspective um she wave says anyone else feel like a sneaky little rat not really yeah sometimes I guess And Larege says, these guys are nutters. I mean, okay. Sure. If you're, whatever. There was some controversy.

An ongoing thing that Jarlings do not like us talking about is the richest man in the world. Eli. Eli. Yeah, fucking Eli. Eli. Eli Rust. Who isn't talking about Eli? Well, we've got a couple of different perspectives here, and it was, it was mixed.

Okay. Mixed. Reese Sterling said, please don't be discouraged to talk about Elon Musk. I can't get enough Elon hate from based gym. But then Kno K says, I think, at least I hope, the reason some audience members dislike the Musk discussions is probably because he's already all you hear about on the news, and they're just tired of it. I'd be disappointed to hear that they don't like the discussions because they are Musk's stands. And finally, Jake says, Keep talking about Musk.

The guy's low-key ruining my country and more people should bring attention to how disgusting he is. How are you feeling on that? How's your gut telling you to react? It makes sense. Which one? Which perspective do you side with?

Well, both. I mean, I understand being fed up from overexposure, but at the same time, it's like this isn't something you get to ignore. Yeah, I can't be doing with apathy yeah like he's the most evil thing

on the planet now at the moment he's like he's he's um godzilla he's like randall from monsters ink he's he's he's like um he's like that freaky kid from toy story we need to send him to the uh isn't he sent wind up in Australia getting beaten up by

uh in the outback he does yeah Yeah. I'm going to fuck. Yeah. Fuck apathy and fuck siding with Elon Musk. So all that's left is talk about his cringy ass and his straight up Nazi behavior.

The man is a Nazi. Yeah. And I guess I hear what they're saying with the you can't avoid it. Because I was at that level. I was in like a good. play sort of and I was getting my car, M-A-Ted, and I was waiting in the waiting area, and there was like a TV. And what comes up? It's the news is playing, and they're just showing Elon Musk tweets on the fucking news. So it's like, what am I supposed to do? I didn't even want to watch the news.

Get angry. Get angry. Get angry. Like Randall. Get angry. Take drugs. Play Black Mesa. Hypothetically. In-game, I think they say. They say that, right? okay Alex very funny what's up with the if you made it this far comment x thing does it give you sick pleasure to make people do things or is this some sort of engagement algorithm thing is it a hidden message um i'm not making anyone do anything you have your own free will what are they talking about um you know and like sometimes when i'm just feeling a little bit cheeky we get to a certain part in the episode where i'll say something like if you've got this far oh yeah yeah yeah it's not an algorithm thing it's just a fun little thing and then you go

oh yeah just a way of and it helps the algorithm which helps us yeah exactly it's kind of like chuckle brothers to you to me to you to me you to me you know yeah one of them died yeah sad that um well speaking of sadness jack says this the reason i can't bear bear to listen to any sonic discussion on the cast is because you only engage with sonic in bad faith we all are well aware you do it on purpose with the intention of pissing people off and call Blimey. Governor, it works. We just got a blimey in there. Wait, no, what is it? By-crikey. By-cricky, yeah. Nothing to do. Blimey. But spiteful conversations don't make for good listening. Yeah, they do.

Sonic stands alongside characters like, this is gonna piss you off, bro. Spider-Man, Bart Simpson, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Characters that are corny by design that you wouldn't think twice about saying cowbunga, spouting one of their catchphrases and making quips. It's all a part of charm and you have to be real lame if you think you're too cool for that or maybe you're too slow dude you fucking idiot you stupid fucking idiot you fucking idiot you fucking idiot you can't get away with that you can't get away with that Sonic and Spider-Man in the same fucking conversation too far even the T even the turtles don't deserve that I'm gonna say I put Sonic in the

turtles on the same level no no sonic is blow hey yeah turtles are way better yeah so much better and the turtles are shit now they're cool they've been redeemed for me I didn't watch the the spider verse fucking turtles I'm happy with spider verse fuck the turtles now they're cool I do you know what I will put Sonic on the same level as uh jinx What, the Pokemon? No, no, I remember that weird Sega game. It was called, like, jinx, and you, like, fly around this, like, weird...

What the fuck are you talking about? Genie thing. I have no idea what that is. Um, I was gonna say, like, stoner Bart Simpson. Ooh. That's more, like, the level of coolness. Hype B's Simpsons. Like, like, Bart Simpson with, like, the red eyes.

And he's wearing, like, the green cap and the green, like, weed. shirt like cringy fucking um stoner butt speaking of going too far I was I was unfortunately I was on TikTok right and speaking of Sonic I got to a you know I think I'm to show you the screenshot this is just how completely fucking unhinged TikTok is right on my homepage this just comes up and it's like a picture of Sonic 3 and in text it says full screen to watch or tilt phone so then yeah i tilt my most not that's not yeah i tilt my phone and then just the movie's just playing like sonic three the movie's just playing on tictock and people in the chat are just like watching it what is that legal no um but that's just how it be yeah

at the top of the screen was like the subway surface yeah yeah yeah that's probably the best way to watch the I hate Sonic God he sucks Um Right one more for this bit From Bath Tub Tom Hello jar Dardias and surrealist Jarling here

First one of those Because we're talking about the urinal The tape modern Um The urinal A.k.a fountain By Marcel du Chump Is one of the most fascinating

Historically important artworks It was basically submitted To the inauguration of one of the largest art exhibitions in the US, half as a troll and half as an example of what Deschamps called ready-made art, highlighting the ability of anything to be called art when displayed as such. The piece was accepted to the gallery and as it had a rule where any art would be shown as long as the artist paid a fee.

However, the urinal was hidden away out of sight because of the obscenity of it. This sparked outrage and debate over the exclusion of the piece and the nature of exhibiting art. Deschamps was aligned with the data. Alice, yes, that's their real name. Artists seeking to ridicule conventional realistic artwork largely as a response to the rise of fascism in Europe. Also, the urinalysis. Urinalysis. Is that a fucking word? Urine analysis. Displayed intake modern is not the original, which makes it really funny to me that so much the arising in time has been put into perfectly replicating the piece that was originally basically somewhat of a heartfelt shitpost. Have an awesome one, lads. Cheers. it gives me um it gives me the the vibe of when danny de veto and always sunny is pretending to be like an art mogul yeah he walks up to an air conditioner he's like i love it i love it yeah yeah i uh i remember learning about da dais and stuff like that um i thought i forgot about it until that comment and uh basically

or something to me yeah or something um there's two things i want to talk about if we go to the mid break and the drama the first well it's a drama of my own um number one number one drama uh so everyone knows i'm unhinged right and i finally figured out a way how to become hinged. Uh-huh. We talk about social media, right? Uh-huh. How it's...

Just a little bit problematic at times. Uh-huh. It's kind of got problems at times. Uh-huh. And I figured out... Social media, more like anti-social media. Thank you. Exactly what I was thinking and trying to get across.

Uh-huh. But I've discovered a way, and this is something, this is like a life hack, I guess, something you guys can do, um, out there in the field. Uh-huh. Um, on each social media that, at least I'm, allows you to like Twitter where you can schedule posts you know every single one you can do it this includes YouTube Twitter whatever can you do it on Instagram I don't know I don't know I

don't know I don't hate Instagram I'd never use it but if you can do it why not try out in there what I've done on Twitter on YouTube on all these schedule apps the most heinous things videos of me like saying slurs saying evil things videos of them scheduled I schedule them for one week in advance. Huh? If I don't change the schedule, I'm in danger. Ah. Ever since I started doing this, my efficiency is, my memory's better.

I'm like not on edge as much. I'm on, I'm on edge more, but weirdly that brings it down because I'm like... It's the only thing you're on edge about. It's that only thing you're asking. Yeah, yeah. It makes everything seem kind of less stressful. The only time you're edging is when you're nearing. Yeah, it's kind of...

a form of edging you know yeah yeah yeah yeah you're like um anxiety stress edging yeah so um let's not hope i like have to go to hospital or something or like yeah you're done if i like passed out at the wrong time man it gets to 1201 and you've got a different opinion to me you're not going to like this version of me is this your type of grind set i guess like it it keeps you motivated yeah is it do you have goals in between like you have an objective that you have to do before you can cancel there's one objective and it's just remember right okay and it's it's like coffee you know it keeps you alert it keeps you alert it yeah yeah no I understand that that's some smart clever uh uh ingenious uh huh that's what you're thinking

uh-huh okay yeah yeah i mean keep doing it there's different layers too of course yeah i think everyone should do this yeah and you can have it like be you could have a 24-hour version of it where it's like yeah it's a bad word but it's not as bad as other ones you know well in theory if you had it like the worst possible yeah and it was daily would in theory you'd you then become almost like superhuman. Because of your memory. Yeah, you're having to like put so much thought into that and... Well, you could, yeah, if you take it there, you could do that.

It doesn't have to be a day, it doesn't have to be a week, it could be literally 24 hours. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Schedule something dangerous, something that you know you're going to lose your job. Yeah, if you're losing everything. If your boss finds out about this... You're losing freedom. Yeah, when Kea finds out about this, you're going to be in prison. Yeah, yeah.

yeah you know yeah I get maybe maybe all those people were just playing this game it will fail the game yeah um and kind of speaking on that actually this kind of segues nicely into the other thing I want to talk about has your YouTube algorithm started turning into maybe this is like self-report all these videos of these like random British people saying the UK sucks I'm leaving the UK and you should do type thing not my shorts but no like proper videos yeah yeah yeah yeah a lot of my videos yeah yeah like we're like a uh um developing country now and yeah because i want to know what you think that is about because there's there's there's two sides of this coin right we're allowed to

hate on the uk i mean anyone's allowed to but like i'm not going to listen to you necessarily Especially if you're an American and your opinion on it is based on what you've seen on Twitter, right? In which case you may believe that we're in a totalitarian communist hellscape, which is often what people say in like, oh, if you don't, if you jaywalk, you're going straight to jail over there in that police state. What an American? And it's like, no, here. Oh, right. That's how they talk about this. Yeah, I know, I know.

But do, no, you keep going. Because, like, if it really was that bad, I've tweeted, like, anti-royal family stuff before, anti-monarchy stuff. Would I... How would I say, I like, I've never had any issue saying anything like that. Yeah. And not even specifically to do with the monarchy. Nothing on the cast has ever been restricted. We've never been approached by the government in any form about anything we've said regarding, like, speech or this kind of thing.

And yeah, the country has fucking problems, duh. yeah i think um can we just talk about like the the actual problems yeah i i i think our since i mean since before we were born i think our opinion our nationalism our our we were born like kind of at the peak no we were born already in the decline no you if we could be our age now during the 90s that would have been peak i think no but i mean in in terms of like nationalism but like in regards to what i'm i'm talking about like the consensus the global stage yeah how people yeah obviously like it and like it's it's not a good thing to be a superpower necessarily that that normally

comes along with a lot of like very immoral behavior and like abuse of other nations basically that's what it boils down to but along with that was a lot of like British like Britain is the best like we're the fucking we're the main I remember literally thinking as a kid like isn't it crazy like how big the world is but I was like born in the main place. I was, I was, I, like, I'm in the, yeah, yeah, I'm in, I, I, I'm British, you know, that's how Americans feel. Yeah, yeah. And, and they, they are it at the moment. Yeah, um, but like, we've come out of that for a lot and there's no, there's no pretending now

that we haven't, like, post-COVID and post-Brexit, we're like cold alone and embarrassed. We don't have a queenie anymore. yeah queen fucking died queen checked out she met trust and was like fuck this I've had enough yeah I've seen enough this is done it

yeah she had 10 years in her yeah I'd say but yeah it I think what we're seeing in terms of that YouTube stuff and like it's going to be exaggerated and if you watch the videos of which I've watched a bunch

they're way less extreme than you would think Yeah, it's more about like the branding of the eye-catching Yeah, yeah, so obviously it's going to be exaggerated, but it It does make you feel like you're in more dire straits than you are Yeah, it's more just like We're an island of complainers That's one of the things I actually like about us But we're inactive complainers, though

We won't like do anything about it No, no But like, I don't know, can we just say relax? That's what I want to say, can we just fucking relax for once in your fucking life? Can you calm down? Me? Yeah, you. Not you, no, not you.

Yeah. Now I'm getting fed up with all these British people in their bullshit police state. Let's go to America. Yeah, let's go be free. Finally. I think um I think every other country other than the UK is better well yeah it goes about saying everyone already knows why are you even making videos talking about the UK shut up yeah let's just pretend like it doesn't exist yeah

just go back to how you were yeah know what I'm saying but you want to bring the empire back ideally yeah You want to be the Darth Vader of the new empire? No, I want to be Sidious. I want to be, I want to be the emperor. Really? Yeah. I guess that makes me Darth Jaja.

You can be Darth Mool with robot legs. That's just cool. Now, I want to be Jaja because it's like my fault that everything goes wrong. Because of the emergency powers by the Chancellor. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is how Liberty does. Mm-hmm. With five thunderous booms.

Is that the actual line? This is how... I thought it was how democracy... Um... I thought it was like, this is how liberty dies with thunderous applause. And then George Lucas win. He tip the cap. And then he said to no cap.

That was no cap the most fire. Yeah. Thanks, George. Yeah. So, in conclusion, stay far away from the UK, and if you're a resident here, you need to get out now.

Yeah. You need to go now. Before they start building the walls around the coast. I'm fucked because I've got no passport. I'm trapped. No, just get a New Zealand passport. Can't. They look cooler.

They're making passports illegal. Finally. In this country. Finally, they just ban travel. Yeah. no i mean there is some good shit coming out of the uk right now we're coming down to like a a four-day work week yeah we got um lowly young we got lowly young being the biggest fucking shit stain on the planet like like we we can release fucking shit head pop stars just like

america like we always could and we still can i'm so clean then i filled my nappy I'm fucking shit myself She's on the new Tyler album there I know and she's good on that song Because she's just screaming in the background I'm so messy Or am I clean Well the thing is to me it's like just

If you're rich just accept that shit Own it, yeah Yeah don't fucking act like your Your auntie didn't write the guffalo Yeah don't act like you're not one of the fucking rats With the rest of us in the fucking rat race running around the fucking little rat traps getting our cheese with your chasing our

cheese you're living in a palace of cheese yeah you know and that doesn't mean you you haven't suffered and struggled and put effort in but it makes it look like you haven't when you pretend to be the same

does that make sense lowly young and the palace of cheese lowly young and the rat race for fucking cheese if she releases an album called rat race race for cheese and suddenly my opinions flipped well if she releases an album called like rat palace or something that would be sick as fuck yeah that'd be cool yeah then then

opinions would flip yeah everyone would hate her apart from us because I'm so poopy I'm a little bit stink oh god we're just playing we're only playing we love Lola we love Lola we love Lola we love um I spelled Lola L-O-L-E-R. L-O-L-L-R. Lola. Luller? Well done, Lula.

We love Lola. Oh, messy Lola. Oh, ain't she Gorge? Um, I'll tell you what's Gorge and it's the drama that's going to hit after these messages. Bye Bear Bear, Bear, Bear. I do declare by Bear Bear Bear Bear. Bear bear shirts and mug available now. Check the description below.

I'm so stinky. Got a pooey, but... I always come first in Mario Kart. I stay in second till I get my shell. That's actually a good idea. Stay in second till first gets blue-shelled, then you plow. Um Welcome to the second half of the podcast

Er What That was a weird Second half intro Do it again Let's get right Let's get right Let's get right

Why did the Suggestion thread Um What are other things That DJ Killer Keem says Let's do it DJ Academics

Ooh, we don't talk about him Yeah, right? Something happened, right? Yeah, yeah, he's fucking creepy. Um I don't know what I was doing it Um, yeah, this is the part where we head over to the suggestion thread,

which is just completely fucking ruined and obliterated because one jarling is just fucking gone like completely. fucking gone, like completely un-y-un-hinged. Onion-hinged. Do you- Do you know who it? No. Look, we, this is the part of the show where you go to the comment section and you say this in the comments. If you got this far, comment, the final, final, finally.

The final, final, comma, finally. Okay. because you remember the evil jarling right so long ago now we haven't had an evil kind of jarling drama since then I guess like quite on this level I don't remember what the previous one was the evil jarling yeah but he was like lying that he was no I remember him as a character but like the last his his like his last joker outing you know his Joker scheme. His thing petered out, yeah. He didn't have a good ending, you know. Yeah, he just kind of disappeared. Yeah. He had a good, he had a good first act, but a week third, you know?

Mm. Uh-huh. Decent second. Kind of a intriguing second. Yeah. Which amounted to nothing in the third. Exactly, yeah. Yes, yes, quiet, yes. So this is, this is a war. This is single seat versus final afternoon, three, three, one nine. Okay. There is a war. Okay. A lot of war happening on the Spirondering on the biggest one. This... This... This question is what has started the war.

Um, it's more so... Okay, I'll try and give context, but this is... Bro, this is fuck beyond. This is fuck beyond. I... I... I guess I just have to show you. Because last episode, there was this whole...

Wait. This whole nonsense, right? with this character final afternoon who on the in last week's suggestion thread which is where you can go and leave comments for us to answer in future episodes he replied to every single question with an answer he thought we would have but from his perspective so it was mostly wrong yeah yeah i remember that was a different guy there no that's final afternoon keep it straight oh the so that that is the the human centipede the human centipa guy yeah yes so we I don't know if we've made a mistake acknowledging him or maybe no but I went on his account and I looked how long he's been leaving that comment and bro he's been leaving it so long where it's like I'm not taking responsibility for this is on you man this shit on you and there's 215 comments on the suggestion through because of this um so what he did was because I guess we made fun of saying we're never going to answer your fucking human sense to be question we're never going

to do it and he sabotaged the whole whole suggestion threat so now I'm in a position where it's like you cheeky motherfucker you get one you get this no one has ever done this so you get to do this once if you try this shit if I see one reply to a question you didn't leave in that suggestion thread the next one isn't this one instant ban baned really I don't really ban people but this you might be you might get the first mega ban I actually have to put a post up on the subreddit saying this is your last fucking warning it's Jesus Christ

I didn't realize he's he's like the uh he's the guy that we burn on fireworks night yeah look you read my warning post is at the top yeah right that's it that's fucking it look I'm a chill guy kind of like snorlax in real life but final afternoon this will be your final afternoon if you do not stop this chicanery. Jokes are fun and games until someone, bracket, me, gets hurt. Do not be the first jarling to get the hyperband. Bracket, two steps up from a mega.

Bracket, we'll stop. I'm eyes emoji. Yeah, okay, that's pretty serious. So I don't know bro. What are we supposed to do about this? And the mods have also, they've helped him. Look at what's happened to the suggestion thread, look. This is my thread now, your comments will be consumed into my gut.

If you wish to assist, upboat my selection and downboat everyone else. This is the final afternoon. And look, you put an attachment picture of the grave mind. And then a bunch of like creepy pastors. Bruh! bro look i'm gonna hand the iPad this was a suggestion i didn't actually screenshot it but this guy's scaring me you're gonna get scared by what you see i'm gonna hand you the iPad okay um and you just scroll through and just just tell me what you think what you're seeing what

what goes through your mind i think he he must have a bunch of alt accounts or something that he's used to uh upboat this or like i don't know charling's like chaos i'm sure but bunch of them are helping him for this one and you get this one I get to do this once are these all like AI they will look like kind of creepy pastor images yeah AI creepy pastors

they're all like spookies yeah but look look go back to the top and start looking at the replies to final afternoon because a hero jarling has come in and he's fighting the good fight he started is it single seat yeah single seat

yeah single seat yeah single seat started replying to every final afternoon. Yeah. Saying the same thing and what's he saying? Fuck you final afternoon. He went through every single one in the Justin 3rd replying. So this is actually like a back and

forth battle. It's an actual war ground. To me, to you, to me, to you. It's scary though. I don't like the imagery. Is it freaking you out? It's spooking me. It is scary. And I'm scared that he has all these images saved because I bet he already had them too.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't like it. It's freaky, man. Is there nothing else here? It's like, scroll right to the bottom, because obviously he downvoted all of the real questions, and they're all that hidden.

So you've got to, like, free them. This one's deleted. Ooh, that's scaring me. All of these are scaring me. So, yeah, maybe next time don't do that. Maybe you do something a bit less scary. Yeah, this would be funny if it wasn't scary to me. Really? Did he scare you too much?

It went too scary. I'm good... It went too scary for me. I don't... Like, I... I've never really handled scares that well. That's not scary in you. No, I'll not want to the camera. Now, how about this? Is this scary?

Yeah, that's a little bit scary. Yeah. Um... I wouldn't like to see it. Bro. So, everything's ruined? Um... Is this our final afternoon, morning, evening or night?

You did kind of... This is why I'm okay with it for this one episode, okay? Because he's turned it into a gimmick episode. Which is found by me. I like gimmick episodes. Singular. Singular. Well, you should have said episode.

them because you just said episodes yeah because that made sense within the context of the sentence that I was saying for you for everyone why you treat me like this why they treat I've got a theory I've just come up with the theory I think final afternoon is a year it's funny you say that it's funny you fucking say that why it's not me I think it is. It's... Conspiracies are being born.

Oh, shit, really. Some people think it's the J-R-R-G-R-G. Oh, okay. Oh, fuck. Holy shit. Yeah. We have talked about that before as well. Mm-hmm.

Okay. So, uh, I guess you can... I mean, you can decide. Um... I'm quite good at being convincing, though. And I promise... I pinkie, promise. I think it's you.

Not me. I genuinely think it's you. But this is what is so good about this. I hope at least one person genuinely does think it's me just because how low of an opinion they must have of me to think that. You know? Like, they must think I'm like a scumbag. Like, I spend like 12 hours concocting this elaborate ruse. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Going over years. and it's all been building to this and not only that I'm like talking to myself I'm replying to my own threads I'm making new threads threatening myself and then on my

alt's alt replying to my old do you hear me yeah I wouldn't put it past you well yeah final afternoon is me

I mean isn't me what did I say is me or isn't me can't remember but I'm suspicious um well that's pissed me off though what bit I'm so messy final afternoon is messy yeah and then way too fucking clean I would say final afternoon is the messy single seat is the clean yeah you know the dichotomy yeah I don't like being scared I don't like um i like being scared in a controlled safe environment yeah genuine fear is frightening

really i'd say it's ruined i think this this might be a throw in the towel moment this might be like well yeah final afternoon finished the cast yeah this is the last episode we've been beat he's fucking ruined it for everybody yeah he won and this was this is what's he's funny I'm letting him ruin it because guess what he's not me ah I have I have three hundred pages of unused comments and questions three hundred hundred the internet could go off and we'd be good for years yeah okay you've had like a even even even holding toilet paper since COVID exactly and look I'm gonna prove it to you right now look at

Look at this. Look at this. Look at this. Look at this. Look at it. And these are unused. Okay? Look how many there are. Oh my god. Look how many there are. What the actual fuck. Look how fucking many there are. Look, it's still going. It's still fucking, what is at the bottom of this? So I read the very bottom. Yeah, the bottom. No, the one. Don't read the very bottom. One up from the bottom. bottom. Oh boy, another episode where someone bates James into ranting about porn for an hour. Yep, this is a gold mine.

Yeah, so, uh, I'm just on principle, I'm not going to fucking do a single one. A single what? One of the 300? No. No. Well, unless you want to, of course. I don't know, what is even the time code? That's only 51.

Nah, no, we probably should do a couple. No, fuck. He's fucking killed it. Should we talk about Elon Musk for nine minutes? Yeah. That was some new cringy shit he's done. Do your best Elon impression. Because a couple episodes ago, I did one, and in the moment, I thought it sucked.

But I don't, and listening to it, I was like, hold it. You've just got to like, just. Drain yourself of like charisma yeah of personality and make sure you have like zero Just energy mm-hmm like a lifeless husk dark mega I think I didn't even know what he like says is the thing Dark mega what's dark mega what's dark mega Maga. Dark Maga?

Oh, do you not know about that cringy one? No. But he likes to- he says he's not Maga, he's dark maga. What the fuck does that mean? You know, like, uh, I don't know, like Dark Link. You know, it's like the... Right. The cool, edgy, like Batman version.

Shadow. Like Dark Beggar. Yeah, Shadow. Yeah, he might as well be saying, I am Shadow the Hedgehog. Yeah. Wow. Okay. Uh...

I feel like my... I feel like my, I kind of sound like Elon Musk already a little bit. I didn't want to say anything, but... I feel like I do. Like, just that, just that. Your political opinion is definitely line up with it. Don't. No. No.

That's your final afternoon. No. No, it's speaking of final afternoons, I think we should Minecraft. Elon Musk. I think we should... I think we should Minecraft. Yeah. Maybe final afternoon is.

Final afternoon is Elon Musk Yeah Look at his His uh What is it Dota or whatever What's that fucking game Oh the one he like paid someone to grind in

Yeah Lola Young I think that was it Yeah He paid someone to grind in Lola Young Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ew Um

What's Do people like Lola Young I don't really know Yeah, they love her. They're obsessed. Because she's so messy but also so clean. Yeah, she's the Elon Musk of British jazz funk pop. I kind of feel like she's, um, the second Amy Winehouse passed away, this energy was like lifted into the air. And when the second Lola Young was born, it went into Winehouse.

Into Winehouse? You mean into Lola? And she read the Gruffalo so many times she could lyrically. spit fire whenever it fucking matter yeah it's all ghost written by the gruffalo rights that's why these rhymes be just clapping yeah yeah

good book good character design I'm gonna be honest I never really gave a fuck about the gruffalo really was the grufflet wait wait wait there's the better one you know the where the wild things are

what totally different children's book irrelevant no the witch the witch the fucking ugly witch the fucking jelly the witch no not bad jelly the witch the witch with the the witches the same no the same art style do you remember the witch the gruffalo the witch oh that shit same art style is that the same writer because if that's the same writer i don't know it might be a quentin blake situation yeah it might be just the artist and different writers or something i'm i'm breathing too much although i'd recommend the cockatoos by quentin blake

awesome illustrations in there yeah is that roll doll there is it called the cockatoos because roll doll was famously no he wrote that one i think oh really i believe so i could be wrong it's been a well since i've read it's it called the cock i don't know the cringe cringe cringe cringe sorry i was going to buy a quentin like framed image from you can't do that why of what don't worry it's not road roll doll you're not going to cancel me if having the twits on the wall Yeah, rolled down. I'm not even going to say what he did. I'm not going to say it.

A little bit nasty, a little bit nasty, not as nice as final afternoon. Nothing's as nasty afternoon. He's ruined everything. I've lost my... My... Your tachunculus. I've lost my... Your tachunculus.

I've lost my... your tachunculus have you seen that the uh the new dragon age sold really badly yeah it's the cringiest fucking game i've ever seen that shit's lame i took a screenshot of it um it was a bioware writer uh-huh um saying about how yeah here it is i was a writer at biowair for five years 2011 to 2016 i learned a lot during that time from exceptional folk in many disciplines um but also specifically from my fellow writers and are amazing editors on both mass effect and dragon age brands today not a single one of those writers and editors remains employed there there was a bunch of layoffs again obviously

it's a dragon age thing and uh i'm still hype for mass fact though there's hope um just pack it up just fucking i'd say yeah disband biowa it's not biowa it hasn't been When was the last time they were biowahua? Mass Effect 3. MassFect 2. Hey. Yeah. It's been a while. Let it go. We just need to start letting things die, you know? Yeah. I don't need another Mass Effect. It's already ruined. Star Wars, ruined, Halo, ruined. Fallout, ruined. What ruined Fallout? 76? No. New Vegas. Oh, yeah. Spicy. No. Three. No. Yeah, everything's just learned to let go. Yeah, Skyrim, shit.

The Witcher, woman, female protagonist, gay. Yeah. Fuck that shit off. Yeah, I was excited for the new Witcher till they revealed that there's a woman in it. I was like, oh, I'm not a man. Gay, not by. Like, not by or not bisexual? I'm not buying it, is what I mean.

Because you are bisexual? You want to play. It doesn't matter what I am. I'm not a woman, so I can't be a woman. in my game where I fight monsters and aliens there's not alien in the alien ones as well I don't want to be like why would I want to be oh his halo seven but you're not master chief you're a woman so why the fuck would I want your master woman yeah you're woman chief it's like no you know um what are the women

The woman has to be a naked hologram. Yeah. The woman has to be bound to a little chip I put in the back of my head. I don't want her to have autonomy beyond where I put the chip. Is there not like a level in cyberpunk where Siri comes in? And it's like, I'll have one of those. Siri? Yeah.

Like Apple Siri. I thought that was the character's name. Spelled differently. Spell like Sirius Black. Oh. Oh. Like, Siri is in the Witcher. That would be a good little joke, like the whatever,

what's his fucking name? Shadow the Hedgehog, idiot. Keanu Reeves, he pulls out his phone. Nicest man in the world. Yeah. Pulls out his phone. Hey, I'm here. Who's calling me?

And it's the Siri voice playing the character from the Witcher. Is this Siri calling me? That would be cool. Wouldn't that be cool? That would be really subtle and fucking sick. I'm going to have. I hate Steve Jobs.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to be a terrorist now. I love Luigi. Yahoo? What, the Google? Do you know what I think about regularly, and this is a deep cut? In the movie Inspector Gadget, the movie version. Yeah.

With the killer in the makeup. Yeah, the murderer. There's a weird joke. I guess it was early 2000s and Yahoo was a significant player. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It crashes into a sign that has the website Yahoo on it. And then, like, a sound effect or something goes, Yahoo! As it falls.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's like, is that like a baked-in ad for Yahoo in this weird film? Yeah. That's why Google is where it is today. Because of Yahoo and Inspector Gadget. Yeah, not only did Inspector Gadget kill that civilian, but Inspector Gadget killed Yahoo. Yeah. I used to like a Yahoo answers at least.

The one good thing Yahoo has ever done. Yeah. A Yahoo! Because I'm so Yahoo and I'm so Google. But I never asked Jeeves. Do you remember Firefox? I mean it's still around. Really?

Yeah. Do you remember Linux? I mean Linux are still around Huh? Doesn't it isn't SteamOS built on it What? Like on the Steam deck?

No The Penguin Linux Penguin Penguin Yeah Are you serious? I don't know I don't I literally know nothing I could not know less

when I get home I'm converting my MacBook to fucking Linux there's one thing I know and I've gotten everything out of my brain so I can remember there's one fact well it's not even a fact it's more of a status want to know uh huh well I'll tell you

or Samsung well as I fucking talk oh yeah the one thing that's one thing that you know is what you were talking about to pause for drama the only thing I know yeah is certain plants when they're thirsty what their leafs look like that's it is it is it not leaves no not it's not leafs when they're thirsty their leaves look a certain way it's leaves leaves what with a V right fallen leaves tell a story

when you get so scared you start shivering have you ever smell a fart just like a a disparate fart in the wind some like from from another person that you don't know but it smelled good like one of your own uh uh no no is it possible it fucking farting fucking possible fucking so brain rotter bro and the farting thing I think no yes yeah no oh nah uh no no how very what one more thing before I we do a after hours um and this is one you're gonna like okay normally you hate after hours and the whole time you're like fuck sake yeah I am like that until I press record and then you go but I want just each of us to round this episode off

with a final message to final afternoon for what he's done how he's ruined it yeah yeah and and a want one more what this is my one one more warning that's all you're getting and maybe one more weeks worth of warnings after that but then it's really finished uh um i'm gonna say if you do this again i'm i'm not gonna but i will self-harm in minecraft you hear that his blood is on your hands final yeah i feel like that's reasonable i'll cut my leg off. I'll cut my foot off. Professionally?

No. Myself. Really? That's even more dangerous. And that's on you. I'm... I'm... yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, you're not allowed to say that. Say it in Minecraft. Um, in Fortnite.

What's the game when you, where you can cut your leg off? Um... Like I'm a necromorph and you've just gone for the arms. Isaac, cut their legs off in Dead Space Do you know why in Dead Space there's like writing all over the walls saying shoot their limbs?

Why? Because in playtesting people were so dumb and weren't listening to the like audio for characters speaking that they had to write it all over the walls so people would start not shooting them in the head. Right. That makes so much sense.

Yeah, because it was a way like why is it like it's made so obvious yeah really hammered home uh-huh i love that i love that but yeah i listen final afternoon if uh if we hear from you again we're going to hire someone to kill you in Minecraft and uh oh uh can you just like can you say just a couple things right now that I could plug in to maybe some things I'm going to have to edit out or edit around. Okay. Like what? What are some things you said? Um, anything to do of like Minecraft. Killing. Oh, okay. Um, what can I say instead? Like...

In Minecraft. In Minecraft, um, Roblox, play Roblox. Uh, well, I know what you can say. Like, just say like, um I didn't mean that that was in Minecraft so I can just put that audio recording like just roughly over it I didn't mean that that was in Fortnite and in Minecraft so just layer that like again and again yeah yeah um should I use more games that was in valiant heart. Now you just make me sad.

Um, that was in Child of Light. Uh, just kidding. I mean in. Can you do one more? Can you say, I'm going to protect you?

I'm going to protect you. Why'd you say that? Huh? I thought I had to. Well, yeah, you contracted to. It's the only way to make a living these days. Yeah.