JAR Media Posdact - the POET that didn't know it

Episode Date: December 15, 2025

https://www.patreon.com/jarmedia Timecodes: 00:00 Intro 05:21 Housekeeping 31:51 Jaden Smith CBT 40:17 Mid Break 42:32 Best Letter to Live Inside 45:35 When you find out your such badass 48:29 UK Conscription 56:51 Erase a Bug. Become a Bug. 1:05:39 Performative Music Taste #BroCastS6E7

It was 1943 I was a cabby at that time I used to drive three cabs one of them always smelled like Chipalitis Have you ever been to New York Me? I was born there Southside

I was born off 38 on Broadway He got into my cabin he said poo dash we are in a fault I never forgot that line all different vibe change vibe um I don't have to change vibes that quick

uh you put some smooth jazz in the background and my inner new yoy comes out I was stranded out in the Chippelotin mountains I was stranded in the Cumberland mountains I hadn't had pizza for weeks all they wanted was a slice

with that beautiful Cumberland No yoy pepawoney That's my shit Is this the last accent That's left That's allowed to do Allowed to be done Yeah

Yeah The rest have been swallowed By the woke liberals Finally Finally Me and Saigon Hand in head He got into the back of my cabby and he said

My name's Sargon Take me to your leader I'm Sargon of China What's this China you speak of You just have to go and take a dad, didn't you? You just had to go and take you to China, huh? Why last episode were you keep saying Bubba? when i was like um what are we doing here bubba yeah who's bubba

uh bubba bubba bubba we know who bubba is sorry this is just engrossing my mind jim's watching screensabers for anyone wondering yeah but what are the like strings of water Pooh, dolphin poo Ha ha ha ha ha ha China poo Good afternoon morning evening or night Ladies and gentlemen No Baba I'm from Singapore

Broca's season six episode seven I'm Alex joined by Jim Baba I'm Singaporean No His name was Baba He did me well He said he was from Singapore but I wasn't sure

I wasn't convinced Yeah Gabby I'm from No I'm from Singapore Cabby Have you ever been a member of the Chinese Communist Party Said of that I'm Singaporean no

Well I'm from the Jaya Media Patreon Hey bloody nice one And I've got a message for you From the Jiao Media patrons Over at the Patreon That make the show and the audio version possible Get that raw Unfiltered MP3

ad free on your favourite host of choice do you understand me are you fucking understand me were you rhyming that on purpose what what do you mean you were like

you can get the MP3 for free do you understand me no I thought I was like completely fumbling I was like panicking

yeah you were like doing your poem I'm a poet and I didn't even quite know it yet the poet that didn't know it I was some sort of poet And I guess I didn't know it

You said he was a bubblish poet He didn't really know it though But that's not Well you don't just get the raw unfiltered MP3 Are you serious? You get more than that Oh there's more Patreon names First or second week of each month

They did that last episode We read them out We read them out Cringe dosage for the years Yeah After Hours Supplementary show Big ass playlist

Growing over there last week we watched a donkey con country show from 1997 we watched the first episode of that that was pretty cool it's a good show it was a good show um that's not all those there's a good show matt walsh talking about superheroes my unhinged uh ticot likes uh sonic dot e xe reading neo robot reveal pays his chance a few chances going on over there um any that stand out to you um i like Billy's... Billy crunching meal.

Yeah, meal devours, Bickies and Geel. Yeah, that's... Neil devours, Bickies and Geel is probably our most premium.

Yeah. And I guess last but not least, you get the JAR Media group chat. It's a group chat. Everyone on Patreon where you can leave suggestions

and things we'll talk about, like what we do in housekeeping, which we'll transition into now type thing. Um, yeah, so let's round off some of those conversations from the last week. I'm starting with some from the Charbadia group chat.

Starting with Phoebe, the number one mendicant bias appreciator. Was thinking of getting a jar tattoo. Should it be the current logo or something else like Dig the Head? Bear Bear, my funny honies. Get Sandy. Get Tim. Smiling Tim. Yeah.

in full colour they yeah no I think the sandy frame is the shout because like that's like the it's like a dog whistle nice

you know because like the layman will see sandy yeah it's just a particular frame I loved from SpongeBob yeah it's just a classic sandy moment yeah you know Sponge girl want drink drink

I would say yeah you got Sandy is an option redacted redacted apparently I forgot to do it last episode for one and it upset people because they were like I'm trying to wean myself off and like

yeah you cause relapse excitement you cause relapses like dick the head with the flowers on yeah that is a cute one there are cute options or a gun yeah a gun would be

yeah that would be fucking cool we get a gun as long as it's some kind of weapon yeah swords swords are all right I was in London yesterday and I was um he saw someone walking around with a sword

you probably wouldn't no no I walk past a house in Greenwich um and I could see through the window like Christmas tree and then sword like a like you gotta defend yourself

like a gerald silver sword from the witcher I want of these right it's like a yeah this is because I love the witcher not for secret defense. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, when you, when like, a gang breaks into the house,

there's like five corpses, and they're trying to figure out. When you start spamming X real hard. Yeah. He's like, well, I have the sword not as a weapon, of course, just I love the witcher. Five corpses. They were coming at me.

They were shocked, man. It was just there. Yeah, I got to go to poo. um what's sit and do tomorrow no I was just

coming to London yeah yeah it was just on the screen and I'm just like oh fuck that place man it's Moss Isley

yeah but you know people love Moss Isley especially Destiny fans at the moment this is how you summon Red Bull guy oh yeah

you hear that his ears prick up someone's calling van to van yeah what are you saying how much you love London's Corosan yeah

and it fucking rocks on Corrisson I'm going to meet Rebel guy and we're going to go do rebel rounds or whatever would you want to go to like a fancy meal at the top of a tower in Corrisson or get fucked up

down in like the club where the the changeling gets glopped i want to be with the changeling's getting glopped yeah you know you know i remember titanic they have it like oh right yeah the bougie lame shit at the top yeah yeah yeah everyone's getting fucked up down under low down under down under yeah let me just uh crack this bad boy open oh like in china oh they they've like properly made chorus on in china like with the aliens and everything well There's like now highways Jedi in China now Yeah they figure that

Well they've had Jedi for ages But um They they've got those roads that are like Halfway up skyscrapers Oh yeah I've seen those Yeah so everything beneath is like The the dark zone You know can you imagine living at like the bottom of that

Yeah yeah and like You never see the sun So you just um Get fucked up Maybe What's it called the Jedi city? the fucking that building

Jedi Temple Yeah That's where it would be On planet Earth Is on In China Yeah, it would be yeah Yeah for sure

It's not gonna be in fucking London Is it Or maybe it would be like In the heart of Russia You know what I mean Yeah Yeah North Korea

North Korean That's pretty cool man That's a cool concept yes well speaking of cool concepts mr blue pumpkin said has jim ever thought about playing lisa p i'm usually not a fan of souls games that aren't from frumsop but lisa p is so good to the point where i think it surpasses some of fronds own catalogue while this exploration is not as good as combat more than makes up for it's like sacro and bloodborn had a baby although the parrying works a bit different to sacro also it delivers on the pinocchio theme really well to the point where

It's one of my favorite interpretations tied with Guillermo's, um, Pinocchio. Guillermo's. Is that what the P? Yeah, I was pissing people off in my Frankenstein review because I kept saying it wrong. What were you saying? Gia. Gielmo? Giamo.

I don't know. I was saying one of them wrong. Two L's like, um, like Los Poyos Hermanos. I don't know. I'm not fucking Mexican. Poi. Pipp. Yeah, Los Poyos.

Because 2Ls makes a yur sound. So, Guilmo. Gaei-Gi-e-e-M. Gamo. Yeah, I'll just go with that one. Yeah. Yeah, I've thought about playing it. I don't have a PC at the moment, though, so.

What you do is just broken. Well, yeah, I physically have all the parts that make up a PC. Yeah. I hope you don't need any RAM. I don't actually well unless that's what the problem is that would be typical yeah yeah I bet that is the fucking problem um we just realized we kind of need a lot of ram um we need all of it actually kind of need to order all the dedicated wham yeah my robot friend kind of needs all the

ram in the world right now yeah my Neo is running kind of low on the RAM that's why um I don't invest in anything outside of ram luck just conveniently i've been finally it's it's bought buying ram for 15 years yeah and it's like yes you're where it's all gone yeah finally it'll be like when i was hoarding toilet paper like i always do and then got in trouble do you still have lots of poo-poo paper of course i do i call it poo-poo paper for those listening i'm glad you made that understood brother i'm glad you that I understood. Okay.

But yeah, Lies of P, I want to play it. I just wish I hate the name. Yeah, the name's Lies of Pinocchio. Yeah, Lys of Pinocchio. Why have you shortened it to P? It's fucking weird. Yeah, it is weird. Also, I, like, I still need to finish Bloodborn.

I'm still, like, always bumping Eldon ring. When that mine runs dry, then maybe I'll get it. Or if it's just cheap enough It's been in my wish list for ages Is there a Eldham Ring mob where you can play Sackero, like literally As someone's modded in the The Night Rainerang one

No, not good enough, I want literal Sackero with his mechanics in Alderming. Yeah I mean Really, it should just be an option Make it a fucking deal see how about it Um Groo by my owl pair

This one's kind of interesting from Podge Thoughts on the Australian social media ban for under 16s Have you heard about this? Yeah I have some questions It's pretty pointless, right? How do you monitor that? I would need to see the data as far as like

Yeah, they just can't get it now But I just don't believe that they're not on it Yeah Like they'll find a way Right, surely Yeah, I don't know, I feel like it kind of makes it more dangerous for them because now to go on it they have to pretend to be

older right which is dangerous I don't know if they've got like the ID check thing that we have here or how they right yeah but even then like that is fakeable right yeah but I mean if there's a way to make it work then sure but it's more the implementation I would question

and like the actual on its face i guess i don't really but it's like how do you you've given people the freedom to buy ipads for their eight year old yeah yeah yeah but also like what there must be so many of these devices why why why

why why ban it yeah um I guess the argument is that it's bad for like development and socialization and radicalization and

I don't know It'll stress me out. Like, do you think parents that had to worry about that compared to parents that have to worry about all the things from before, but also now social media? Which one's, like, a better situation to be in? The thing is, I feel like we've almost proven that people are just as radicalize a, ball as like 30 year olds and if not if not like if anything we should ban like 40 up they're all the people who get really fucked up like yeah no i get what you're saying where it's like a band-aid kind of solution where it's like a government stepping in where in a place

where it's so extreme and so out of control when actually we take a step back it's kind of extreme and out of control for everyone who's using it. Yeah, how about, um, how about we, we stop allowing these, like, gambling algorithms. Yeah, we should be furious about this. We should be like, yes. Why are we letting our children have this? Why are we letting ourselves? Like, it's fucking crazy.

Yeah, but normally when it, like, impacts children, that's when people are, okay, that's too far. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think it, I think it impacts adults more. I think it just impacts everybody. yeah yeah what's funny is like I guess a family member

he gets like lessons on like how to use the phone right he just doesn't get it yeah yeah yeah um I found out he's been he's had multiple years of these lessons and he's like learned nothing

uh huh but like hand an iPad to a three year old and they just know yeah yeah yeah yeah what's i think they're designed to be um so accessible and simplified yeah yeah the three-year-old is probably the prime age to use an ipad they're supposed to be like idiot proof yeah it's like what they're designed around like like you can't break this you can't fuck with this yeah yeah yeah yeah i don't i don't understand um because it's like social media like uh instagram facebook youtube tictock they're all banned right mm-hmm like in australia yeah so what

what isn't what can they use any way yeah I don't get how yeah I would need to like do way more research and how they've actually actually like what there's also so many phones and so many like cheap ways to get the shit like you can get a phone for so

cheap you can just go into like an SEX and get some like refurb's yeah yeah yeah yeah get a phone super easy and I'm sure you can in Australia too well and like VPN's is super accessible now um I feel like this stuff is

driving people to a bunch of like free VPNs which just farm your data and sell it to the highest bidder. Even the VPNs you pay for do that. Really? Yeah. Well, there you are then.

I mean, everyone does it. Like, fucking Tesco does that now. They're all just in the business of data. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's, yeah, it's, all of it, we're targeting the wrong things. Like, this, this is um,

The, the issue with like liberal belief, um, and not to go too deep into like another political escapade, but like, when you put all of the responsibility on like the end user, on the individual, so then you are going to start implementing policies like this. It's like, it's not how it works. We, we have, like, they, they are in control and they give us the access to all this stuff we're like everyone's just fucking monkey people reacting to stim they built it and implemented it it should be on them to build and implement it in a way that's better for all instead of yeah instead of being like well no you you should um treat it differently you know once you hit 18 then then you can um like have a gambling addiction then then you're

allowed to you know substance abuse and like yeah stupid it's like yeah stupid it's like yeah dropping a bag of coke next to someone and just going, good luck. It's like walking off. It's like... Yeah, yeah. Like leaving a bottle of whiskey with an alcohol.

It's like, yeah, I wonder what's going to happen there. You know? And this shit is so designed to... But it's also, yeah, it's their prerogative to not implement this. Then it's, they don't want to tweak it in a way that makes you use it less. Yes.

That's bad for them in every economic way. So they're not going to do that. So they have to be forced to do it. Yeah. For the good of everybody. And it's not like a country thing. It's not even like ideological at a certain point. It's just like...

It's not, but we live in an oligarchy where they almost have more power than... Like lobbying type thing. Than government. Yeah. Because they can just say, okay, I'll give money to your opposition. You know? Like, yeah. Everything's bought and paid for.

So that's what I think about Australia. Well, a perfectly run had an interesting follow-up. Hi, educator jarling here. A few eps ago, you two mentioned the Pythagorean theorem a lot. Honestly, I can't remember why. But if it's common knowledge or not, I don't know if it's common knowledge or not, but did you know Pythagoras led a cult of sorts?

Why many details are shrouded in myth, his cult believed that numbers were the centre of life. They also believed that reincarnation and banned sex and father beans, believing that beans give you gas and farting takes away the breath of life. And each bean holding a human soul. Anyways, would you join this cult, bear bear? I'm not joining the banned bean cult. Yeah, that's crazy. If it was like the opposite way around, the bean cult, maybe.

You know? Yeah. Pro bean. Yeah. The gas of life. Because I thought at first, oh, it's just another joker. Fucking with me. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then I researched it. Some of the... On Joe Rogan. Pythagoras was actually a bean hater. He had a Pythaguerus AI, like, as a guest on an episode. And now he's like... How do you feel about beans, Pythag? Pyth.

That's right. Pithe. Yeah. Don't get me started on beans, brother. But yeah, the ancient explanations include... food, as to why they had, they banned them in this bean, anti-been cult. Beans resemble testicles or embryos, taboo for purity reasons. Beans cause flatulants, making them impure.

Beans contain a soul-like substance. Beans were used in democratic voting, so refusing them symbolized avoiding politics. Beans resemble gateways to the underworld in some ancient beliefs. where did like purity come from purity yeah like this fear

it's all sex stuff isn't it yeah but do you think like some some like priest wasn't getting any so he was like

not fair I think it's more like being so protective of your bloodline and wanting to make sure you have control over your bloodline you know

because if you know who's demonizing i right yeah right yeah um bartender homer says hashtag porn addict to you i'm a bartender 27 love the work but thinking about getting out into a different avenue i remember jim would often mention he worked at a pub does he still do bar work work or if he did switch avenues how did he find that? Does he have any tips with someone in my position? Also tell him to watch Andor. I've been told. Um, yeah, switch. You, you don't really need. Did you have a specific, like, thing or was it just like, now's the time to, well, like, I, I, I wasn't really finding it, um, like, rewarding. Um, I don't feel like I was, like, I don't feel like I was contributing very much um but i mean when when you work in a place in like a pub through

covid era right yeah you don't really feel like a pillar of the community you know um but like i i don't think you really need advice to be honest because when you change and do something different it's it's just that a matter of time until that becomes the new normal you know and it's not actually that much time for a brain to no it takes like two weeks and then you're like oh shit here we go again yeah yeah um yeah so but i mean it's it's it's all depending on circumstance and like what you want to do um do you want to like get educated and go for something like that you already educated i mean i guess in this current climate it doesn't really matter job wise if you're educated or not it's more like if if you have the

passion and means to do it yeah yeah exactly because yeah the job job market out there's crazy if you're um crazy bad if this comment is in the UK at least I can't speak for other places true yeah um yeah the job market is insane it's kind of a little bit dukey fresh yeah it's what um your favorite marshal would refer to as how you say dukey fresh yeah something like that yeah dukey do dokey um or two more before we go to a break nude gargoyle says thoughts on chris stuckman promoting a gambling app for half of his wicked for good review I thought this was really lame and bad for his brand after receiving praise for Shelby Oaks.

Do you watch slash watched Stuckman reviews? I've seen a few, yeah. Do you know about the change he made when he started making Shelby Oaks? There was some controversy, right? Well, he made the kind of decision to stop doing reviews that have any like kind of negativity in them. um right so he did that and then recently there was this kind of drama of the we're just talking about the gambling shit it was like a wicked gambling app thing

there's a wicked gambling app yeah we get children addicted you know yeah I more have the kind of philosophical issue with reviewing things without really including criticisms yeah I don't know know because he he's going from the perspective of like okay i've been made i've made a movie i've seen like how ridiculously difficult it is and i don't want to throw shade or come across like i'm throwing shade at people um so navigate industry is less uh there's less tension or something or but it's already like i don't know you've already done you have the whole backlog of reviews and that's kind of like part of the job right well i guess it it depends what you want to be

right if he wanted to go just full film then just make film make films like don't stop it's a bit cake and eat it too type thing yeah it just seems kind of redundant because now who's gonna go to him for an opinion like what's the point yeah I don't know if it really would have actually hurt things if you still just was honest about his film takes I guess in the industry it could yeah in the industry that's the motivation yeah because fuck Paulano fuck that fucking asshole he's a piece of shit man he's an evil man

according to one quentinine yeah no shade pulled down it we might be getting Paul dana on the carst for the record like we have that kind of rapport where um yeah I can like kind of jokingly throw shade like he gets it he's on it um he's gonna be dressed

as the riddler as well yeah yeah riddle me this jar mhm ha ha ha ha ha I heard a rebel guy's going to be the villain of the next Batman. Oh shit, really? Which is going to be a... Vantavidble, Vatman!

It's going to be like a Netflix. They're going to put more true crime in it and shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, Batman v. Zodiac. Yeah. With egg unit. Oh, can they, can they do like a crossover with, um... What was that Netflix?

The murder show about the gay? Monster. No, the gay one. Yeah, monster. Is that what it was called? Yeah, because the, first it was just about that guy, the one you're talking about, season one. But now it's on, like, season three or four, and they've made it into, like, one of the biggest shows on Netflix, and it's called Monster now.

Oh, really? Yeah. I've only seen... Jeff the Killer? Jeff the Killer's next season. Right. It was Egg Geen, and its shock and, like, structure kind of, like, the Avengers. I'm not joking.

I saw, like, a bit of the last episode of the Egg Gein. season yeah like towards the end that they do they're trying to go for this dream like tone thing at points well like again is I guess he's like going insane or something or having a dream my in the dream he's like meeting other serial killers and like characters from like psycho and shit like that what the fuck it's really bizarre what the fuck man yeah um if I wasn't if I didn't have to watch all's fair then maybe I would of uh watch that instead what's that will feral and um ryan reynolds minted mint it's not called minted i can't remember we gifted minted spirited spirited some shit like that i haven't even

seen it but it looks like the worst thing ever we should watch it for a christmas like special let's take ketamine and watch it just like the whole video is just like Yeah. Don't take catamine. It's really dangerous. Yeah. Yeah, you want to stick to the, um... You know, the good one. I've found, um, microdice... microdicing. I've, I microdose now. I microdose, um, alcohol.

Just a shot before I do anything. Well, no, so throughout the day I'll have like, six or pints or so just like gradually through the day you know you put me in one of them like runners bags on your yeah I'm just running around town full of fucking lager

anything like a little bit challenging you reward yourself with a sip or two with a pint you can do the like knife thing um well let's wrap this half up with a CBT oh fun

Suggested by Bumper Munch. I won't reveal what it is yet, though. It's a secret Until Jim perhaps guesses it. Do you think I'll get this one? I don't know. I don't know if you've gone down this rabbit hole. Put your money where your mouth is, son. My instinct says no. Okay. But you do know who this person is. Is it Bubba? Some might call... What are we doing here, Bubba? So I've got 25 quotes here. Jim needs to give them a cringe-based or tough.

and perhaps guess who it is along the way. Are you ready? Yeah. People tell me to smile. I tell them the lack of emotion on my face doesn't mean I'm unhappy. That's based. Yeah.

Yeah, it is based. If newborn babies could speak, they would be the most intelligent beings on planet Earth. Oh, fuck. I know this quote. Everyone knows this going. What is it, though? Treat it as it is.

It's cringe. Is it Jaden Smith or something? Let's just keep going, yeah. Okay. They want you to believe the sun is hot. I urge you to ask yourself, have they ever touched it? Think about it. Cringe.

All the rules in this world were made by someone no smarter than you. So make your own. Cringe. We want to create a society that is working. working for us and with us and we're working for society, not against it. Read it again. We want to create a society that is working for us and with us, and we're working for society, not against it.

Cringe. The only way to change something is to shock it. If you want your muscles to grow, you have to shock them. shock them. If you want society to change, you have to shock them. Cringe. Lots of society you want. Yeah. People say, I want to change the world.

You can change the world for better or for worse. I want to heal the whole world like a superhero would do. Is it Kanye? I'm going to keep going. Cringe. I have a goal to be the most craziest person of all time. And when I say craziest, I mean like, I want to do Olympic level things.

That's tough. Yeah. When the first animal went extinct, that should have been a sign. Cringe. Jesus Christ. I'll never read every single book or go to every single place. But I'll die in the trying of it. That's her fucking cringe.

Jesus Christ. I love that phrasing. Yeah. Being born was the most influential thing that's ever happened to me for myself. Okay, that's based. I can't argue with that. Being born. I'll watch movies I like to see.

Steve Jobs interviews, something that's going to make me smart and then go to sleep. That's fucking cringe What the fuck man I want to be the most durable person on the planet Cringe When life gives you big problems Just be happy you forgot all your little problems

That's pretty based The world is going to keep bashing me for whatever I do and I'm going to keep not caring. That's tough. I like all types of music. Even though rap music is 80% of what I listen to, it's not the only thing I listen to. Okay.

Cringe. Everything that I talk about in my music is pretty much just trying to evolve consciousness in the world and help everything become better. and brighter. Cringe. If everybody in the world dropped out of school,

we would have a much more intelligent society. Oh my God. True that. The cringest one, yes. Jesus Christ. You can discover everything you need to know about everything

by looking at your hands. Cringe Be careful with how you make the world perceive you Because they'll perceive you like that for the rest of your life I'll give that one a best Hmm I feel like a serious revolution needs to take place in order for human beings to evolve in a way Where we can truly exist as a society

Cringe and finally how can mirrors be real if our eyes aren't real I fucking caught it immediately wow um so that is of course jaden smith a kind of modern philosopher

he's fucking stupid I love the one about school that's awesome if everyone in the world dropped out of school we'd have a much more entourage intelligent society. Oh my God. That's smart, man. That's a good idea.

It's just abolish school. Yeah. He says from like, imagine like the level of education. Yeah, yeah. And he's still dumb as fuck. All the resources, like you couldn't have like a better like chance.

Yeah. And you're still the dumbest motherfucker. Yeah. Yeah. He's been handed literally everything on a silver platter. No, I was just looking at my hands long enough and I just kind of figured it out.

Like, can we try and break down the mirror one? I'll repeat it, those who might have forgotten. How can mirrors be real if our eyes aren't real? There are a few things you have to buy there. That he's come to the conclusion that mirrors, the objects, the reflection isn't real because our eyes aren't real.

I guess he's trying to say, like, Like, if you think deep enough, like, nothing's real. You know, like, I've taken a hallucogenic, and it's opened up this is another part of my brain. And, like, whoa, I've seen that everything is actually like a matrix of energy just moving. So it's like, nothing's real. Eyes aren't real. We're just seeing what we're being forced to see when there's actually everything is to see. Yeah, but that's a fucking stupid, like, tapes.

I know, but I'm trying to, like, think of, like, from his way. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. How he's breaking it down. yeah how do you come because the main statement that is confusing is eyes aren't real yeah but i'm thinking from someone like him yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah that must be like what he's getting at right like nothing's real because we can only perceive what our limited eyes that have evolved this way can see yeah but that doesn't make the eyes not real yeah they still exist like

yeah it's a very strange thing to say i'd love to hear him like explain that one what do you mean jaden i'm looking at you jaden sit down here with paul dano and explain eyes yeah and um and i guess as we normally say before we transition into the mid break minute minute minute is we say minute three times minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute have you ever been associated or affiliated with the chinese communist party No, Senator. Again, I'm Singaporean. Yeah. Hello there.

Hope you played the new Destiny Star Wars expansion. This episode is sponsored by Star Wars Destiny to Renegades. Is General Drivience on Destiny? Yeah, you can buy a skin. You can buy General Greber's skin. Can you get a Hello There emot? I bet you there is one. Cool.

Yeah. I love crossovers. I love crossovers. Welcome to the second half of the cast. Where we do our normal destiny update. How's your guardian getting home with the power grind, brother? How are you finding the destiny expansion? Shut the fight.

This is a destiny podcast, right? Or did I open the wrong portal and go into the universe where I'm not? not doing it as I'm not doing it as to the body of us. So this is about the show. We answer questions from the Jal Media subreddit. It has been cleaned up of the diseases.

It's been, um, you know, what's it called? Occulated. Oculated. It's been occulated. Oh!

You know what I mean? You fucking occulate that shit. Occulate, does that mean turn into eye? If you got this far into the episode, I need you to leave a comment. Occulate the eye. How can oculates be real if eyes aren't occulated? Well, um... Have a sip.

Sorry, got a bit of a tickle. Have a sip. I had a little sick. right you ready no because this is going to be an onslaught of sorts of questions like this one from big whoops hello Alex I need you and your compatriot to rank the best uppercase letters to live inside of for the context of the question imagine you are a 2D soldier taking refuge inside of a letter I attach an image for a rough example of what I'm talking let me see let me see let me see Good luck and Godspeed.

So they've taken an uppercase B and put a stick man in each sort of lump of the B. That's cool. That's a good one. Like a two-bed flat. Yeah, B is safe. I think A is comfortable if you're a solo soldier,

if you're like a lone wolf. Yeah, as I would be if I was a soldier, you know what I mean? Would you? I'm a kind of lone wolf type guy. Yeah, so you're going there? the up bit because like it's like off the ground

no I'd live in the in the line on the queue yeah in the line no the lines are like the walls no in the line of the queue what you know a cue is like an

an O but you put a line yeah I'd be in the line you know like no you can't be in the line that's like a wall like Osama bin Laden

lying in it no that's not how it what is confusing because the other one showed the two guys in the space of the bees oh so you have to be in the you can't be in the line I want to bury inside the line no yeah you'd be like

well in that case are you no because then you get cold no in summer you would be good an A is just like a teepee then yeah but off the ground Like you're in a triangle with legs That's what I like about the A C doesn't work

R D D could be loungy R would be nice In an A type way But S Nah No top of S would be good

No Yeah it would No because you're You're open to the elements I guess if you want like a sniper perch That would be a good Like a sniper Yeah

that's cool yeah that's fucking awesome I wonder if they designed S's that way for that so 2D soldiers can snipe from the giant S's that they're taking refuge in yeah

yes yeah getting esoteric it's just getting esoteric you know it's getting abstract you can live in it and go oh dear

oh my it could be a sign as you go into the O oh fuck even a lowercase so even though it might be a bit of a squeeze we're not doing lowercase that's for another episode saving that one

shaving that one L B Siquegoydick says imagine if you work up in the middle of the night for a glass of milk and out of nowhere you were attacked by a serial killing intruder but this time you were just way too fucking epic to an extreme degree. And although you're terrified, you just beat the fuck out of that loser. How extremely

epic do you think that would feel? Would it be an all-time moment in your life? What kind of one-liners would you hit as he lies in a mess on the floor? What emoes would you hit? And would you hit a final special move on his pathetic shell? You could hit the classic. This might be my favorite comment This would be like a peak life moment Yeah So like what's the line you've been saving Fuck you

Fuck you asshole Take that idiot A loser You gotta make like a pun With whatever weapon you'd like kill them with you get you chainsore him that's off the chain motherfucker die you know what I mean

yeah get him with the um gerald sword in the granite house winds howling yeah something wolf related would be cool how'd you like that doggy they call me the lone wolf swing swing swing head off

for real though I'd like kick him I'd be all kick I'm mostly like a kick type character so I'd be like kicking kicking and he's down like final kick kick and then I'm like

what are we doing here bubba where I'm kind of more like ranged weapons based I like projectiles type thing yeah you strike me as like a sling um

slingshot of broken glass Bart Simpson no like like a water blines with acid in them yeah

no just water oh with booze in them have your final drink yes yeah drink up last orders bitch yeah

yeah yeah but like an esoteric drink like Lefroig in there you know yeah this is like Marmite like it's such a smoky

flavor. I love it. You hate it. Yeah, there's two intruders. One in one. Yeah. It's the nicest drink. Yeah, the other one's bombing.

Makes my tummy ticky. Well, speaking of awesome questions, Mickey is stupid, said, I'm going to the army soon. Conscription. I'm not a bloodthirsty yank. And this has forced me to start getting into shape. I also had to stop smoking the devil's lettuce, and honestly, these have been some of the best things to happen recently.

Just the fact that I have no choice made these things happen pretty much automatically, and they don't feel like such a burden. I wanted to ask if you've had any similar experiences, and if you've lived in a smaller, non-warmongering nation, because... What? Where are you? Because fuck Bush and Blair and the rest of those cunts. They had to rely on conscription for their defense. Do you think you'd go serve or would you still rather do civil service or other alternative given? Well, what, Norway has conscription, Israel? Germany now?

Does Germany have it? It does now. Maybe they're German. As of two weeks. Maybe it's the rebel guy. Oh, shit. Got space for me, or was that? He had to quit Red Bull when he's conscripted.

Okay, so we got Finland, Norway, South Korea, Ukraine, Austria, Denmark, Estonia, Greece, Israel Switzerland, Brazil, Cyprus, Sweden Taiwan, Lithuania Turkey Taiwan, you mean China So they're You're fine?

Sorry, yeah I'm so sorry Don't take where my social credit please I got my points up big My points just fucking shot up up saying that they give us like extra 10 points to every mention of it on the cast yeah yeah bloody loves yeah what was we saying um have you ever been forced to into being healthy yeah why when i went to the doctor and they were like your blood is

90% Harrybo like Yeah Your blood is like Golden Syrup Like you need to chill son What we're doing here Bubba

Shouldn't be eating a bag of gummies Every night Yeah The other doctor Prescribed me A bag of gummies every day That wasn't a doctor That was the German guy

The German military I'm the German doctor Who prescribes you Harrybo for all the efforts Yeah And Red Bull Yeah, that guy's a doctor He gives you one of those mini bags of Harry Bowman

Yeah, on a night out He's just all he's hanging about This will heal you right up Thanks, Red Bull Doctor Um, but as far as like Would I go to war for my country? Was that the question? Yeah

I would in like World War II, I guess Yeah, if it's like an exercise essential threat to I'd kill Nazis I'd happily like yeah fight against Nazis yeah that's quite a good one to fight yeah maybe the best ever has there ever been like a fight more like hell yeah like a I mean it's that uh that sketch with the Mitchell and Webb yeah we're the bad days yeah we've got like skulls on our fucking yeah they're fucking knew they were the villains they liked it yeah

let's just be the world's bad guys let's just reinvent being bad guys let's define being a bad guy forever um yeah I feel like there's something about if the if the UK was being like invaded

yeah then that would be like a what if it was China invading man well then it wouldn't be an invasion because we'd be, come on in, you know. Yeah, you roll out the right carpet. Or would you switch, like, if it was an invasion, would you switch sides and fight for

China? China, yes. North Korea, yes. No, what if, what if, like, um, like war broke out and you were conscripted just to China? Not to fight against China, but like, you were conscripted into the Chinese military. What has the UK been like absorbed into China by this? Yeah, China like buys the rest of the UK. Sure.

Like they just make a smart investment. Yeah. They buy Swindon. And so everywhere surrounding it gets conscripted. Does that mean like, I don't know. I guess I'd just be Chinese by that point. So probably yes. For China

Are we allowed to joke about this? I don't know if we were making the accent shit earlier That accent We're not doing like race as accents No but like We're just accepting the future There's nothing wrong with that like i feel like is that general rule of this episode for china i feel like there's a general rule of

like humor that punching up is what you want to do yeah right so like yeah i feel like all of china feels a little bit more powerful than just that's yeah like we got to stop with the america jokes because they're so down in the fucking gutter down in the they've already lost like they're boring yeah they're in like the sewers you know yeah they're rolling around we just want to like side with the winners that's all yeah yeah it's a we're like um like america is our woody that we're dropping into the bin you know when andy drops woody in the bin i don't need you anymore i don't want to play with you anymore we're taking china yeah because like all of my algorithms have just turned into like i'm a single man in china this is what

my day is like yeah like videos or like the whitest guy you know i'm chinese now like i just am yeah i just decided like fuck it i'm chinese now fuck like who cares like late to the party in my opinion you've been secretly chinese for decades yeah yeah next it turned out like like there was that um like investigation done in the UK and they found out like most of

the population is just Chinese spies most of the the majority 85% of the world's population are Chinese spies weirdly yeah yeah at least one in two

yeah so One of us is undercover. Yeah. Well, no, we're... We're both just out. We're out the closet. Chinese citizens.

One of us is a Chinese asset. One of us is a Russian asset, and you've got to guess here. Yeah. Who's getting the... I don't even know what Chinese currency is. Yeah, I only read it for the first time. I don't know if you say it the same way. It's called like Chinese yen, I think.

Oh, really? But Yuan. I don't know how you say it. I've never, like, heard it spoken. and I've never heard someone English say it. Do they have gambling in China? They love gambling more than anyone. Really?

What's their like Vegas? Vegas. They probably own like most of them. Yeah, they probably do. Um, yes, I don't know how to hope you there, my friend. Usurp Noodle says, I have a hippopotamus hypothetical for you. You can erase any bug from existence. but doing so means that you will also be turned into a bug.

What bug do you destroy and which bug do you become borned? I would erase mosquitoes because I get sucked so often. And I'd become a bed bug so I could sleep in a nice warm bed. Buzz, buzz. Was that their answer? Yeah, that wasn't my mind. I was going to say, like, did you prepare that before? I just like the phrasing of getting sucked so often.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that's real. Yeah, mosquitoes are the obvious ones But I'm gonna go controversial pick and get rid of bees So I don't really like that bug Yeah, I don't really like honey You're annoyed by how they get like way more credit Than any other bug

Yeah, yeah Even though they're all equally as important to the ecosystem You know Yeah, true But bees just because they're cute and fluffy They get all the kudos Yeah And the flies, they don't get much loving

Yeah, bot flies They've evolved to like look kind of like bees They're fucking cool But none of the capabilities You know They're kind of like Yo, I'm a mimic Yeah, I'm pretending to have a weapon

But I'm actually just chill That's cool They're like aura farming Yeah And they like float perfectly Like that's fucking crazy So I'll be a hoverflow Um

But wait no Because if there are no bees No there's still wasps and hornets So the colour scheme still works I'd pick like a parasitic bug Why? Like those wasps that lay in caterpillars Why?

Because it's horrible Yeah, but Why do you give a shit about caterpillars? Because they're cute And then I'll become a human-sized caterpillar Hey, it's Dune part three Yeah No, I'd want to be like

I'd be a beetle No, yeah, I'd want to be a stag beetle Like, I mean, just a human-sized Stag Beetle And I get to still make podcasts and shit like that Okay But as a Stag Beetool If you're like sat with like a vodka tonic Like as a beetle

Like big ass like horn Yeah Knocking it into shit and Ali, you're a nice guy Imagine the rounds Like Stag Beetle human hybrid goes on Joe Rogan Yeah

And then you actually take him to task You're like I think you're using your platform Really responsibly People really listen Because it's a Stag Beetle saying it It's like, yo, I think he is being irresponsible with that platform. What's he going to say about that?

Yeah. You can't, like, retort against the... The only thing he says is, like, if you're human, I probably wouldn't take this, but the fact you're a stack beetle is kind of blow in my mind, so... You're right. You're the new Joe Rogan. Hey, I'm Joe Rogan, but the Beatle at this time. Joe Beetle Rogan is the new most popular podcast.

And I'd say, you're going to give me your golden retriever too. You don't deserve that. blockhead, he's mine. And Paisalian blockhead? No, that's... That'd be a good combo. You think that's too fast? Yeah, you shouldn't take a man's dog

just because he's a fucking piece of shit. Um... Oh dear. I'd be a ocean bug. Uh, one of them... One of them riders. You know, surfers radars. No, one of those...

Skimmer. One of those, uh, worms that, like, is in the sand and they're really long. Yeah, I want to be a bat fly I want to live in the skin Let me live in the skin E bugs are gross but cool They are fucking cool

They're really cool I think being a praying mantis would be cool I think like a cricket No being a mantis would suck What? Because you just fucking get eaten Yeah No a cricket

Like a bouncing thing Doin That should be One of them One of those What are they called? The ones in the ones in Zealand oh shit they're fucking crazy what they're wetter that's a bug that's right yeah

they're terrifying they're very slow they right they can freeze in winter they like get frozen solid and then they thore out and just keep doing what they're doing really yeah bugs are hardy yeah yeah and the most brutal they just like walk around and like well if it fits in my mouth I'm just gonna eat it I guess yeah yeah they're so they're they're like um like like low requirement AI yeah they're like base level function yeah like they that's just what they do yeah they they're they're like to me the most similar um like animal to plants yeah you can like see how plants like evolved into or not evolved into but like it comes from the same thing mm-hmm you know i get where you i get where you're like

multicellular living thing. Mm-hmm. You know? Bug. Tree. But there's also, like, more sophisticated shit than we would give credit to these bug ecosystems as well. Like, when you watch ants, like, solving problems. Well, have you seen, like, the ant draft?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, stuff like that. It's insane. Like, termites and termite structures and shit like that. It's all, like, really cool. Well, I mean, beehives. Hmm. Like, they, they have, they have genetically built into them, like, construction, like, knowledge.

Yeah, like, architects. Yeah, naturally. Yeah. Which is fucking crazy. But I'll never get over the ant raft. Or the ants moving, like, the T shape through the space. And doing it, like, more effectively than humans. Yeah.

It's like, they're talking. Their level of coordination. To me, T.O. To me, Tio. Yeah, I love it. It's really fucking cool. Yeah, it's really fucking cool. So I'd be, um,

I'd be the hive-mined ant. The termite queen. Not the queen. I'd be like the, like, all the ants. Like a colony. I am the colony. Oh, you're the hive mind?

You're the We Are Legion. Yeah, yeah. With a geth. Yeah. Oh, Rick and Morty already did that. Rick and Morty's done everything. No, Simpsons has done everything. Rick and Morty is just Futurama, but cringe.

And Futurama's kind of cringe as well sometimes. It has some cringy episodes, but it also has some of the best episodes ever created. I think the best episode of anything ever is The Devil Hands Frived. Oh, that's a great one. That's some, like, my head canon the last episode. yeah because that was the like proper last episode when it first got ended i think future armor has for its like cast of characters has some of the most consistently funny like range of them yeah and it was so different and so wacky yeah it's not like oh they're

getting an episode yeah yeah yeah yeah where i feel like every other show has at least one of those was like god damn they're getting a fucking episode he's got who's like the worst futureama episode character out of the main crew yeah so i don't know because i think they're all funny yeah that's the thing like whenever there's the mars stuff with amy is funny funny the um zyberg it's all so funny and crazy i like when zoeberg eats the flag oh yeah it's freedom day but they're all like no you can't do that uh yeah well the like leila mutant shit there's like so much yeah that's just fucking great yeah bender's obviously when bender becomes like a a cat addict

he's plugging into the mains he has like a relationship with the ship in that one that's pretty funny and weird oh shit yeah doesn't like a Star Wars movie do that that's right yeah the Millennium Falcon turns out to be Lando's like side ho that's right yeah

good remembering of Star Wars law yeah that's 10 points I hate that movie it's too good it's too fucking cool you're by yourself or something some sort of hand solo or something Classic line. Classic fucking line.

Yeah. Um, so what was the question? Poo? Hey! Right, we got three more. Before we wrap this one up. The Cosmic Jarling says Bear Bear, I saw it in a cast from a while ago that Jamie mentioned Lofi, Loufi? Levee.

Levee. And that he was going to go to a concert. Is this still happening? Yeah. Is it the UK concert that is next? year i recently went to her new tour concert in the states and it was amazing love her vocals and almost felt like it was the opera thoughts on her music i like i like how do you say it lay vee yeah she's from like iceland so is that a thing and a the u f being i don't know okay because i used to

just call her law fee mm-hmm yeah i just um actually yeah i can't wait till like everyone just speaks through like thought it's gonna be so much fucking easy yeah yeah yeah just read my thoughts yeah it's levy actually but i don't want to say shit anymore just fucking read my mind goddam yeah give me brain bot now yeah um yeah she does good good music um i i i the only thing is i'm hugely keen on like big stadiums. I feel like Where is it? It's the O2 I think. Oh yes, I have been there myself.

We've been there. Yes. I believe you're right. So it's... Well, no, I know I'm right. You know I'm... From your perspective, you might think you're correct. You just said I am. Rot?

Yeah, she feels like an artist from a bygone era. The thing is, there's, there's this weird, um, and really fucking annoying thing on the internet, right? That's like, the, she's, she's being classed as, like, a performative man's, like, female artist token pick. And, like, yeah, I've already got the accusations that, like, I don't listen to, like, any. Oh, why is that? I don't know. I genuinely don't know. Oh.

There's just something about her music, I guess, that resonates. with men despite being, like, feminine? I don't know. Oh. I really don't know. But I've seen it, like, from multiple sources. And I'm like, for fuck's sake, because I genuinely like her music. But, um...

If there's a meme about it, then it means you can't do it. You can't like, you can't see, you can't touch it. Like, I'm being accused of a thing that I've already, like, been accused of. You know? And the meme's not on your side. Yeah, the meme's against me. Hmm That looks like you've got to start listening

Charlie A bit of chapel room I think Charlie might be In the same memes Good The more popular she is The happier I am I don't care what labels are on me

That doesn't, that's not what it Huh Hmm Anyway I've never been to an opera So it's interesting you say that I'll be um Hopefully she brings out

Ed Sheerin or something As a supporting act Something you can really get your teeth into. Yeah. Ed Sheeran followed by Little Mac from Punch Out. Nice one, you corrected it before the game has got

mad. Because I said Little Mac from Smash Bros and people like... When did you say that? I said it on the cast. I was making some throwaway comment. This year, I think. Maybe last year. It was in a brokast. I made a throwaway comment You said Little Mac from Smash Bros and...

Yeah It's actually a fellow from Punchout And he's my favourite Of the character from Nintendo so far Fuck off You're not a real person Like that Russian bot Raged bit at me good

Yeah Oh Russia See the Chinese bots never get me like that I'm always just agreeing with them Yeah that's why they're winning The Chinese bots like They just get it Isn't Lave great?

Yeah. Yeah. Chinese bots are like, I kind of was more on Kendrick's side. It's like, yeah. You like can't disagree. Yeah. They're just right. Yeah, man.

Can I leave all that in? Is that insensitive? No, we just periodically beep. Like, not even on words, just like when there's. Do you like, um, more scared? Yeah, Morse code, like... A message to China. A message like...

Yeah, to China. We come in peace. Yeah. Like, let us join. Let us... Give us passports. Hello, China. This episode is sponsored by China.

And a huge thank you's to China for sponsoring this episode. Before we get too deep into this episode, let me. shout out our sponsors for this episode, China.