JAR Media Posdact - This Might Break You're Brains - JARCAST Episode 181

Episode Date: August 26, 2019

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Good afternoon, morning, evening. Good afternoon, morning, evening on night. Good afternoon, morning evening on night, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome back. Get off your fucking phone. Yeah, James, come on. We've got a palindrome episode. A paradox.

No, palindrome. Why? Oh, okay. Welcome one. Yeah. Good afternoon. Good afternoon. Good afternoon.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to this episode of the charm media podcast. What? We have with us. Ruben. I know. He's not here. Sorry. This is...

Jamie. Alex. Jordan. He's just embraced it. You know, that's not your name, right? He's actually forgotten. Everyone at his, you know, in his workplace thinks his name is Jordan. I literally, my name at work is Jordan.

That's what I told them is my name. Seriously? Seriously. Yeah. What the fuck? You just embraced it. Nah, he's a joke. Look at him.

He's smirking away. Shout out to the patrons. over at Patreon for supporting the audio version. Over on Patreon at patreon.com slash patreon dash patreon underscore Patreon. And everyone out there who's buying the shirts. At Patreon. Peace out.

So, so, so, where are we? Where are we? Today's podcast is recorded on the same day as last week's podcast. That's why James's clothes hasn't changed. James wasn't here. James wasn't here. So they still haven't changed, though, have they, since...

Ours haven't changed. Mine has changed. They don't know the truth, though. We could just be lying. You could just be wearing the same clothes. For those on audio, James is wearing a grey tuxedo. Looking sharp. Everyone is actually wearing grey tuxedos.

We are... Professional. Yeah. So, how have... How we've been doing recently? ladies what have we been doing what have we been watching what we've been we did that at the end of the last one and nothing's

changed but you can do what I was sitting at work today like I'm going to bring some subjects and then boom that's not a fucking that's not a subject dog that's just that's the thing we do on every episode not every episode well anyway I think we should rebrand as like a far right cast and we're all individual pundits of our own or our own equally

egregious tics Jim I fucking knew you were going to say that it's not true You knew it because you know that you are Can we stop this agenda? Rank Jarvin In what? The communists? Communists all the way to the Nazis.

I'm not a fucking communist though. I'm not. It's fucking boring, boring take. Get a new take. It's the truth though. It's as fresh as today there. What? It's a fresh take.

James is a strange combination of Libetard and alt-right. How? It breaks my brain. How? We've never, no, literally, none of us have ever seriously talked about what you believe. You're against gay rights, but you love trans rights. It's crazy. That one confuses me a lot.

We've never ever had a serious talk about how we are politically. Yeah, no one even knows the truth. Yeah, because nobody gives a shit. Yeah, I don't actually care. I don't care. All I know is we're all pretty much the same. Funny meme. Ben Shapiro, smart guy.

Stephen, Crowder. Epic debater. Genius. Genius debater. Genius tier intellect. You could ask me take some individual people

and I'd be like, well, he goes to college campuses and debates people who are in no way trained or prepared for it. Yeah, he debates like film students about fucking socialism. Yeah, and they're just like,

look, man, I just would prefer it if people were nice. That's all they've got. And it's like, okay, I mean, why did you even bother debating him? He was always going to show. Does it make some look good, though? I just hate that.

I find it, it's a concerning trend let's say why debate people who are actually competent when you could just make yourself look smart in the sun's paper

my problem with that whole debate culture is that like debating is a skill in and of itself you can win a debate and still have a dumb opinion at the end of it yeah

but debate tactics like your opinion on Star Wars yeah yeah yeah whatever do we really

we're really gonna that's really gonna set us off on a good foot so anyway straight into the politic bullshit and then Star Wars holes which is its own political thing in itself it's one in the same it's not even different anymore no it is let's just say this star was a little bit overweighted i've always thought that this is a

quite tasty cider that's proof that james is this is 4.1 units in it conservative no it's not jamie 4.1 units in this bottle i'm just trying to shift them away from whatever the janey would would make the drone army that's all i'm saying the drone army yeah what it's not even a thing the clone army whatever the fuck there's the droid army or the clone army okay you made both. This is James being alt-right, and Libthud at the same time. You want to drone army. It's the middle ground between clone and droid.

Well, isn't a droid a drone? Literally, it's a fucking machine that kills me. A drone as well, as long as it's controlled from somewhere. Speaking about technology, though, in this scary future that we're heading into, that was a topic I had I got a few stories I want to

talk about. Is it about Amazon leaving your packet of condoms to your door with a drone? No. Amazon is one of them, so I might as well start with that one. Supposedly, Alexa listens to you having sex and arguing and, like, stores the information or whatever, the language or whatever. Of course. Do people not think how to it?

It's like, you're putting a microphone in your home. What do you expect? No, that is super stupid. Just because it responds to Alexa doesn't mean it's not listening if you don't say that. And then people are like, wait. what, it's actually listening to me all the time. I'm not listening unless one of you says my name. Like right now, I haven't been listening.

The same is with our phones, though. They're always listening. The reason it can respond to you saying, hey, S word, is because it's always listening for it. Everyone's fucking, it's how Instagram delivers those, like, specific ads to you, because it's listening

to fucking buzzwords, and it responds based on what you're talking about. It's like, if I message, let's say my auntie from, you know, in Brazil, If I say Byron Munich, I will get updates on the Bayern Munich football matches.

Yeah. Happen, do it. Try it. Try it. And you'll get it. Genuinely, it works. It's fucking creepy. Just talking about bullshit and it's like, yeah, I'm thinking about going camping. And they'll get notifications about camping.

Suddenly, you'll start getting tents recommended to you and shit. I miss a good old days when it was just if you Google or a search time, you start getting ads related to it. Yeah. That was fine. That was simple. It was funny when it was archaic. Like, you look for like a USB cable.

And then every advert, no matter where you go, is USB cables. Which is cheaper because you probably already bought USB cable, so it's irrelevant to you after that. See, there's an advantage to that. Say you're building something like a garage or part of a conservatory or

a car. You search your stuff and then when you're searching for stuff. It's building anything. Building anything. When you're on other websites looking at prices, the ads on the website be from the other website of the prices. You're just like, you can compare directly on the page. Boom, advantage. But so I remember when I was

buying all the foam for in here once I'd bought it all there was like some Instagram ad for like here's this great deal on foam bit late Instagram Facebook fuckers but yeah is that like does that do you even think about that

like for me it's like whatever I feel like that's my agreement as a like we're so one with our phones at this point like fuck it just listen everything I do one of my lecturers an academic he uh

he wrote like a compelling book about just saying yeah we're pretty much already like androids or cyborgs or whatever we're already attached to these phones such a great deal on all of our technology that we may as well be a part of us that's bullshit that's cringe you can't get away from it that is Jamie's

rebuttal that's his academic paper no because that's bullshit that's cringe if you reject it then you're actually doing yourself a disservice you are not a part of society in the same way you are a huge disadvantage you can't get away from it now modern fridges you can put go on Twitter on them they're listening you your fucking alarm clock but it's that syndrome it's that syndrome thing we always talk about

where it's like if every device we have is always listening to us then like listen to this nice and it did Apple was listening to that dog that fbi fucking meme oh I think I may have alerted something by saying that your phone let up the moment I said it you're not your watch even that fbi I mean it's kind of true which mean I don't think we I don't think we have like a designated FBI agent for every single person. That would be ludicrous. Then they'd have FBI agents. They'd have... The eye agents.

Yeah, it would be just infinite. It's all algorithms just detecting buzzwords. It would be a huge circle jarge. So, a massive circle. Can we test this then? If we or someone for like four months, fake plans out like a massive terrorist attack, do you think... Bro. Why would you ever

do that? No, no, it's a hyperfetical situation. That should get you arrested, man. But if you fake it all and plan it all to be fake, and someone comes can just be like you've been listening to our time to prove that they they'd still arrest you for conspiring yeah no i know but like on your phone you know apple has like this shit like the terms and conditions it'll all be in there and you're just saying yep i'm okay when you make your instagram account yeah yeah yeah yeah who reads terms and conditions

who's him no one what the fuck yeah exactly we're signing our privacy away lawyers and librarians read my contract for my flat that's it because that's important I read to the whole thing yeah I normally read that kind of stuff as well do you ever do that thing though when you're reading a contract for like a job or something and you're reading it and it's just like those are words I don't know what that means it's not but you don't know what it means the correspondence respondents despondents you're just like yeah the thing about legal way they've just defining really boring things.

The thing with job ones is all the same. All you look for is holiday, sickness, something else. That's all you need to look. If you want to leave, what are they going to try and do to? That's all you need to read. And if you want to be there for a long time, I guess pension, but right now that's like... You skim through, look at those... How's your pension doing, James?

This is my topic, by the way, pensions. It's quite a lot of money. What age is our generation going to have to work to? Like, 80, because we're probably going to come up with, like, a thing that keeps us all the age of 40 forever, and we'll never procreate. it again will all just exist as we do now but in our like prime 30 to 40 i think how the fuck is the prime 30 to 40 i don't know i figure that's when people like the strongest probably is in their 30s

already 30s but i figured we won't be there till we're in our 40s so we'll be stuck in 40 for it depends strongest as what physically yeah and and like you know no that ain't true though 20 people 20 i guess it depends isn't it on what you're doing some people die at 40 can i just say Look at Ben Affleck though, he's only 15, he was Batman. Yeah, but he's shit. And he's already gone. Um, I don't want a pension because I'm no, I'm not going to ever see any of it. Because I will die before I get there.

What the fuck kind of logic is that? You don't want it because they'll have them so fuck. You know, because if I die, I want my pension to go to charity. They don't. If you die before your pension, the government get like 85% of it. That's just bullshit, man. They get pretty much all of it. You can designate a family member to get it, but they get like 20% of your

You may as well not have the pension, just have a savings. Exactly. I suppose it's when your business has like a pension deal where they'll match your pension. That's the thing where they put it in as well. So that would make sense why the government takes some of it. I don't see the point. I don't. Shut up, communist.

The point was, what age are we going to get our money around on stuff? I don't. I want it for me. I can tell you right now, most of us won't make it. What's the point of having all that money there? I'm going to make it. What do you mean you're not going to make it? you're not going to make it. Why would you not make it?

No, what type, what age do you think we're going to get to our, well, I mean, it depends on the person. Yeah, it's so far in the future. It depends. I haven't even got started, like, my career yet. So I'm not even halfway through our lives. And slow down there. I think the current pension age. I was actually born only a few minutes ago.

Really old people now is like 66. Yeah. I arrived. We've got 10 and 60 years to get there. It's not going to be 66. It's going to be more like 90, 80. 100%. I'm not going to make it. Do you think With the way I eat

Is absurd With the way I eat and live Do you think I'm going to make it past 60 Yes I'm not going to make it by 60 People eat I reckon I will live in some awesome country in mainland Europe

It's going to be awesome But going back to something people actually care about What the fuck are we talking about? This does matter How have you remembered what we were talking about I have no idea where this came from Alexa listening in on shit Oh yeah

How the fuck did we get there In our How long is it going to be until Or do you even think this is going to happen that we will reach a point where there is no privacy on the internet I'm pretty sure we're already there yeah I mean you've got like the onion rooster obviously I'm talking about like a world where you can't be anonymous you can't anonymously comment and you have to comment as like a profile or something you create

that's built around your actual name and shit we'd have to reach a point where every country was on the same page like China does that you know there's not much anonymity there I don't think with your internet presence Russia is pretty much in the same direction but we'd have to have every country agreeing like the EU I guess is the thing that you know might dangerously do that but

I don't know we're gonna be in that much longer it's like yeah maybe we'll leave maybe we won't probably won't probably fuck it up and not be able to or whatever I don't always um so you know yes you can if we actually leave the EU shut up I'm even Scotland okay

what about this then when are we going to start installing technology into our bodies. Oh, that's, I'm not doing that shit. I'm 100% doing it. The only thing I would do, look, I play DeusX, man, I know the risks. But are we going to be those old people

that are like, we look at people with phones and we're like, nah, forget about it. But our equivalent would be people like putting phones in their arms, putting shit into their bodies. I wouldn't want my phone in my arm. That seems inconvenient to me. I'd like the ability to... No, you're thinking very linearly. No, what about if it's a way to integrate?

Yeah, if it's like somewhere over my brain, I'd be sort of tempted to, but then I've played DersX, man. I've played DersX, what we'd have it. It was written by Japanese people. They don't know what they're talking about. They were all nuts over there. They've already got like robot legs and stuff from Japan. Let's be 100% will. The moment, augmentation has become real.

I'm going to spend all of my life. They are real. There are people in this town that walk around with robot legs and shit. No, I'm talking severe. Like, fucking full robotic arm. Mechanical arms. I don't think he wants a robot leg, but that. obviously not but I think that was a choice the moment it's not the fact that that even is

no reality is no his leg isn't comparable look to this yeah choosing to replace your arm because a mechanical arm is superior to your body yeah no but this leg that he has isn't robotic it just is very well my point is it's already like we're already getting no no we're not we are no that is undeniable you can't deny that what we're talking about is like day of sex shit and the moment that happens I'm spending my entire life savings to get a fucking roboi fuck this robot is gone be sick let's be real yeah if we can design by like because you know I'm just going to put down to this Adam Jensen he famously said I never asked for this and you know he didn't ask for it but if you did ask for it that's fine there you

yeah but you would ask for it that no I feel like it would be irresistible not if you're Jensen he just wanted to die he was kind of hot already was the difference none of us Listen at this. Maybe if you watch Battle Angel Alita, you'd actually understand what you're talking about. Adam Jensen has a fucking sick coat. Listen to this.

There was, recently, this fucking crazy Tesla owner implanted the keyless entry chip into their arm. They chose to do that. They went out of their way, even though there are a bunch of laws that are stopping people

from doing this kind of thing. Well, isn't it great? You just go, boom, open your car. That's incredible. No, it just opens when you walk near it. What if your arm got cut off? And then you'd have to, like, carry your arm around with you. Like, if your arm got cut off, I didn't think.

Hey, guys, it's me, buzz. I remember reading. I could be wrong on this, but there was somewhere, it might have been Sweden or something, where there were, all these people are, like, lining up to get, like, keys that are, like, built into their finger or something. So they don't need keys anymore.

Some crazy stuff like that, where, like, people are, like, they're eager for it. No, I don't want it. No, all it takes is for, like, fucking Kanye to do it. And then, like, everyone's going to be on this shit. When Taylor Swift gets a fucking robot.

We start getting movies about how awesome it is. Everyone's going to fucking do it. I'm not. You get Logan Paul doing it. So does that mean if I don't do it? I'm like being a hipster by not doing it? Well, there will be a huge backlash. It would be that thing where it's like, you can't stop it.

It's too late. We've already gone down this path. No, it's good. The ideal thing is a USB slot in the back of your head. No back of the neck. I'm just saying. That makes more sense. That's way more.

It was good enough for the master chief. It's good enough for me. Like, what is the endgame, though? It's just to replace us with robot bodies. Yes. With human brains. No, you see, that could be an issue. Well, actually...

Well, because then... I think you need robotic elements. Like, we had, like... No, but the thing is, like, people need to die. People do need to die. It would change the face of everything, though, if we had a robotic society and, like, the way we reproduce is completely different based on the fact no one is dying.

No, but why... We wouldn't need to... reproduce. I think D.SX is the best example of this shit in modern media. One of the best examples of it. Ghost in the show is really good. Yeah, but DASX is closer to now in time. It's only like 2020.

And I think lots of, they're still like comparable elements. It's saying like 2026 in Diasex, like the Adam Jensen ones. But there's like a huge, mankind divided is about the fact that the, you know, the pure humans and the, what do they call them?

They've got like a name for them. It's like a meany word. Anyway, robot people. There's like a huge divide. because all the humans are afraid of robot people but if they wanted to or people could fucking like kill everyone

if they wanted to because they're robot people and they're like just stronger and faster see in that world though aren't they don't they have like machine guns and shit on their arms yeah I don't think you'd be able to just go and buy like your arm that shoots machetes are civilians don't have orgs that make them like that it's just people like Adam Jensen that can

because he's Adam Jensen it's going to be a crazy hundred years coming would you get sunglasses implemented I would so would get sunglasses in my fucking head he looks so cool and just goes it is cool it is cool let's be real

what about this one I read this today microchips implanted in obese people's brains electroshock them when they think about food surely that'll kill you I would 6 morbidly obese people have agreed to take part in a trial aimed at controlling binge eating and improving their health

I guess it would de-exhares them when they start thinking about eating and showing Yeah, but what about when you actually need to eat? I guess, yeah, they must have set hours, a set times which they're allowed, you know, the thing stopped shocking, so they can eat dinner. That happened right with me. That's literally the South Park movie. Like in real life where he swears and gets shocked every time he swears.

That's real life now. South Park's irrelevant now because the absurd shit they used to mock is just real life. Like they were famously fucked when Donald Trump went into office because they were so convinced that Hillary was going to win. a win. But like, it just fucked the trajectory of whatever season that was. And they were just shocked by it all. They can't, you can't satirize like this insane crazy tech world we live in. But is it bad? No, I never said that. It is bad. Why? Because old is better. James is is a stick in the mud. James is an idiot. Old is the one that... Old is worse, dog. You said you don't want orgs. No, I'm not sure if I would want them in me. I'd be a little bit... because of

DeSX, the government, they could just make us all go crazy and be... Yeah, but why would they do that? I don't know. So, let's just say... The government didn't control it, I guess. Yeah, but how...

No, it would be corporations. It would be... And you couldn't just have one megacorp, you'd have to have multiple. That's the only way. My concern would be when it's like, I just get adverts in my head, and it's like, like in...

Eat beans. Blade Runner, when they're dreaming and shit. You know? That's when I'm... But it's like when you're already at that point, that's just reality. Like, we're one step, everything, everything we're already looking at is full of ads. Like, TVs come built with, like, these smart TVs.

They have, like, ads built into the fucking OS. It's bullshit. Let's see how long until I get an advert when I open my phone. Exactly. We're not even noticing it, like, ads and that kind of stuff, we're just so used to it. Every social media thing is lots of ads on it, so. And that's what most people are used. their tech for is for social media for connecting and you shouldn't quite literally

don't be a crazy we're talking about um social media is bad social media fuck off fuck off hey no i'm actually i've i've without social media no one would be listening to our words right now okay yeah we're on social media right now well i'm social media can be dangerous but so it's the reason like everything's just like changing so rapidly is because we're not constrained to these like little towns or little places anymore like everyone is community like now we know what japan is doing we know what germany's doing we know what the government we didn't know what the fuck anyone was doing before and the big deal of when we all live on different planets and it's like what are they doing than that planet yeah but then we'll

have the galactic internet the galactic internet the g internet the g unit the g unit the g The G-Net G-Net G-unit I was thinking today I forgot that you can literally buy Sorry for the slap of

like shit in my mouth just then Um Electronic self-controlled fucking vacuum cleaners That's just a product you can buy on Amazon And they're smart enough where they can drive around your room vacuuming up the shit from the carpet

And they know not to bump in to things and they learn as they vacuum and then they go back to their little charging point and they tell you there was that story recently you know the guy who's one went through dog shit on his carpet and they just thinking it was cleaning just took the dog shit around the whole fucking house do you know so the only good thing about them is the videos you see where dogs are standing on them that's really good it's the only reason about it isn't that that's just a product that is like boring to us now like whatever it's old as fuck the That shit was in Breaking Bad.

Roomba's crazy. Yeah. Oh yeah. When Jesse's having a non-stop party. Yeah, but it's also a massive like plot thing. The Roomba. Yeah, it is. I can't remember anymore.

Yeah, the thing is in it. I'm just interested to see how, how like, drug smuggling is going to adapt and crime is going to adapt to this new world. Yeah, but I mean, if you got a robot body, why would you need drugs? Why would you take drugs? I don't know. Epic. You can't.

Look at Cyberpunk. There's another great example of the dangers of it. yeah no that is actually something I could see happening people getting addicted to like it's the same as like body dysmorphia with the yeah so they just keep going that's literally the subplot of every fucking cyberpunk thing ever no it's not it is ghost in the shell has it no no it doesn't yes it does no games just like ghosts and shell invented it actually cyberpunk is old ghost and the shell can suck my balls I watched the movie yeah it's super edgy but the same

Airplunk must be the one to, like, do it, like, first, right? But then all of it stems probably from, like, maybe Shelley or, like, Frankenstein or some shit like that, where it's, like, don't fucking mess with what humans are meant to be, because you'll only do something bad. No, but that's such, like, a reductive way of looking at it. Yeah. Because as bad as it could be, it could also be incredible. Yeah. I don't think the book says that it's necessarily bad. It's just, like, yeah, he fucked it up, and then he made everything really bad for his creating.

Do you think it's this weird way of like Mother Nature Because we've defied evolution as humans Like we've ascended it But that's Mother Nature's fault For making us be able to No we've It's still Mother Nature though

Because we are continuing our evolution On natural progression based on We've accelerated it from our intelligence That's where we're fucking headed A big fiery pit See everyone says shit like that But I don't buy it man Which when you don't buy it

We're going to a bad place Literally guarantee I mean, climate change could fuck us up a big deal, but, I don't know. People are going to get addicted, then it's going to become massive, like, divide. Yeah, but if we're 100% robot, then what? When everyone's robot, what's the issue? No one is robot. That means, like, the, you know, the military and police are.

Very strong. Yeah, they are. They will also be military, like, robot people. How long do you think it would be down the line for people to be fully robo? It's the classic, every generation that all the people who see new technology coming in and will be like, this is it. It's the end. You know, what is the issue of road? the issue of robots being

humans that's melding with them yeah I didn't no that's being robots there's obviously like the concerns about the politics of how much freedom do the robots what do you mean like individual robots

and we have relations with robot people or do you mean like us no we're robots being roboticised a bit we're already robots we're in a simulation already so like I don't know my only concern

is just how much control government corporations potential for them to fuck with my brain that kind of thing if we're robots don't even need money food isn't an issue what if we become so mechanical

that we just become like a group collective you wouldn't need money we are the guess yeah at that point not even an issue what if that's the ultimate end goal is like just to become

like an ant hive where like we're all just given exactly what we need to do and we don't even rebel or anything because we're all just part of this mechanical system that's just like we need this now I would prefer not to be that

but that's the thing though like more likely we'll just end up when I look at like sci-fi things and the futures, the one I look at like Mass Effect for example you know, that would be

an okay way. The mass effects predicated on finding tech that's way advanced. Which is we don't look like we're going to do that any time soon, so. Don't know, we can't predict it. It'd be kind of awesome if we did. We don't even know what's in our own fucking oceans

or under our own ground. No, but we don't even know what we're capable of. We so far have not met a limit. I want the limit to just be, like, J-Go level of strength. I want that. You want everyone to be J-Go? Yeah. What if you're like robot people,

then we could just have soundtracks playing in our head that were, like, custom being composed as we go around? We all, like, if we're all thinking, you know, let's say this group of people, and they're doing that thing where people think we're having, like, a big fight to a song. It's like, yeah, epic. And there are other people around doing it,

then our robot brains ink and we automatically choreograph an awesome fight to a song in our heads and it's great and we just shake hands in camera by day I mean that shit will be real baby shark epic fight scene

what do we give James for meaming again I'll drink that I'll drink to that nope nope yeah man yeah it's kind of I'm looking forward to it and you be you just said a second ago that like

Yeah, maybe you goddamn mind it. I want a robo eye. Like, I would take, I will pull my own eye out. And what if the government gets control of that eye? Good, they can look at, they can look at what I'm looking at. No, but they can control it. So they make you look at birds. Well, I was born that.

Okay, you were talking about the high point. We've got to consider as no one of us is so unique to the government that they give a shit to spy on you individually. You are just the collector anyway. No one gives a fuck. They do. Yes. No, they don't. They don't care.

The government doesn't want to look at what James is fucking looking at. Oh, yes. I don't give a shit. Ooh. They don't want to look at what Alex. Well, maybe they do. They might think he's committing like tax fraud or something.

So they might look at you. They're listening to us right now. Nah. Me? Nah, whatever. Yeah, that's the truth. Yeah, it is. That is the most likely truth.

Alex, genuinely, they might look at just, is he committing tax fraud? Can I, I'm going to annoy everyone. Ben, people get all moody about privacy now. I'm just like, they don't give a fuck about you. Don't have a phone then. Yeah, idiot. Don't engage in it.

Because what you consider is when, when, it's like the thing of whenever, when no one's, Everyone's private because... We'll be back after these messages! They don't actually care! Life can be a dick sometimes. So get your dick from out your hand.

And don't be a dick, wear a dick. Dick the head t-shirts available now. Check the description below. Well, welcome to part two. This is the part where we go over to the jar Reddit. Tinfoil hats come off. Reddit comes on. We're calming down now.

We're just going to answer some civil questions. Whoa, this is my robot hand there. No. If you want to leave your own questions, head over to the Reddit, and we'll answer whatever you suggest. Let's do this thing. Alex Scott 1811 asks, what are your favourite jarcast memories? I don't really remember them. Every time James has said the M word? Never. That is the M word. I have a very fond spot for the smoking episode. Oh yeah, which I wasn't there for.

I like the fact. I just remember loads of... boo. That was it. There's lots of that. I don't have fun of memories. Everyone getting all pissed off that like we were smoking. Yeah. They were fucking fake Chinese like floral cigarettes.

No, they were actually like anti-malaria cigarettes or something. Yeah. Cigarettes. I remember the cast opening with the crow and then the mayonnaise. That's one of my favorites. James' most hated episode. Future Jim and past Jim. and the

the ghost from the west coast the ghost of the west coast the eminium onesies one was good so basically every single like skit-inth era yeah no flat era basically that's like our Berlin era isn't it those were our Berlin albums and we were like calm down

and stop taking drugs and shit the cave episode as well that's a fucking really good one I love that yeah that was the first one here yeah that was really good And it had like the fireplace. Yeah, that was awesome. What, but...

I remember doing a lot of sound. I actually did sound design for that episode. Yeah, because there was like a howling wind and a fire. Yeah. A firecracking, yeah. You know, we can have to look bad? Because that was like a hundred episodes ago and we stopped doing that. You stop, you mean you stopped doing it.

No, I don't know. You gave up as our editor. What do you hear me stop? Like, we just based it... I'm talking to James. We don't force shit at Jal Media. We just do what feels right. The only thing I force is.

my shit in the morning. Sometimes it has to be done. I can't force a shit. Have you been able to... It'll give you... Hemorrhoids. Piles. I've never had hemorrhoids

and I've pushed a lot of shits out my bum. Your shit must be pure liquid though by now. No, Jane... No, it's the opposite. He's got no fibre. Yeah, it's like just... Solid. It's like shitting pebbles. Oh, I remember what we talked about last week.

I was having diarrhea, wasn't I? Oh, yeah. last week it'll be the week before that but we're recording on the same day episode one seven nine yeah yeah so basically what you're saying is um I'd prefer I'd prefer to have diarrhea every day than just

normal poos every day that's completely irrelevant I don't have diarrhea right now so we've gone way too far away from the original it was just favourite jarcast memories it's supposed to be a nice pure one we had some nice pure ones and then you started talking about poo I didn't do anything the fuck I think my

this on me just because I'm the stereotype poo guy my favorite charm moment is when it's a poo conversation what

some of those what about that that review of fucking that ubersoft game the division the division and the camera angle it was just like

just put it in some random fucking position and like P-Clux was involved for some reason yeah in some no peak

what was our best review? It was Black Ops. Oh, old, old, old, old, uh, the game reviews. Yeah, they were some gems. They were funny as fuck. What's the funniest? Because we watched them. The Fallout one. No, that wasn't the funniest.

Fallout 4 triggered me. Yeah. Um, no, that wasn't the, I'm pretty sure James is right. The cod one. Yeah. What happened in the cod one? No, we're going to have to watch it. It was fucking funny, though. It was a funniest fuck video. Yeah, we're going to have a movie. I'm pretty sure that's the best one.

I don't know if I can cope I prefer to forget about things like that No Ruben they're funny No no no because I was expecting it to be way worse But they were actually incredible They're at least on pile With an Angry Joe video And we're fucking children

Sorry Angry Joe You weren't a child You were like 20 Yeah but I wasn't like in the video It was Ruben presenting With fucking children there carried a lot of like Woody going like you are a toy And it had that energy to it

that denial, that fucking realise it. Yeah, my brain instantly thought of Woody then for some reason. I actually leaves JAR. Great video as well. So I've realized recently is there's so many.

A lot of people I know are really desperate to go back to a few years ago when we were still in sixth form. Films that are really terrible but because they watch them and they were children they like them still. But it's like, why can't you just accept that it was fun then? If you look at it now, it sucks.

Or that sixth form is over. It wasn't that good. Things like that. It was shit. People are so desperate for nostalgia all the time. And I'm just not really like that. I said today, like, I think the only thing I'm, like, nostalgic for... Because the only thing I really liked was just sort of, like, playing Halo 3 and stuff like that.

That's... But that has a like... Yeah, like... I would never want to go back. Fuck no. I can still play Halo 3 if I want. Yeah. I don't go back to 6th one, obviously.

That'd be weird. But it's the memory that makes it good. Like, I don't want to go back to it. I want new things. Yeah. I want to look to the future. I just wonder, is this like it? Lots of my people that I know, or a few people, that's it.

They've, like, plateaued now that's it. They think they've, like, totally reached the full of their potential. Yeah, if you think you've peaked at sick form. And they don't think that anything now past this point could be better. That's, like, really sad. I hadn't quite got that far of the thought process. It's the stereotype, though, of, like, the jocks in high school that are, like, spend the rest of their life just reminiscing about how awesome, like, high school was.

you can't own really fast cars in ice school so um yeah i'm enjoying like you can but you can't literally can't maybe your dad buysy one ollieholic asks what was the most painful thing you have ever experienced the most physically painful thing when i was seven years old we were in new zealand you and me this is a good one and uh there was a this i feel this story much been told you before and I lent on the exhaust and I just like second degree burnt my entire

fucking left hand that that I remember seeing a hand to me in like Christ that's that's hardcore right there No I remember because we immediately put it in like a a bowl of water and

God it was fucking stupid but um we left to go to the hospital and my parents wanted to take my hand out of the so we didn't take this other person's bowl to the hospital because I guess they prioritized the bowl over my hand so they got like a wet cloth and the second I took my hand out that water it was like it was like I was touching the exhaust pipe again it would you reckon that's a second degree I think it you know scars or anything from that

do you know no there must be I guess maybe you were so young yeah yeah it was yeah it was Yeah, but um... You don't feel like any weird nerve. Because the third degree is the most extreme, right? Because that's like all your skin. Mm-hmm. Second degree, because the first layer of skin turned into like a balloon on my hand. Because it completely...

It's blistered. Yeah. And then the skin under that was burnt, but not like through to the next one. So that's second degree, right? I guess so. Yeah. but burns are so painful. No, I can't think of anything that was worse than that.

That's why I'd rather drown than being burnt alive. I've twisted my ankle. That hurt, but I was like really young. I don't remember how much it, I just remember it hurting. Have any of us ever broken a bone? No. Really, not one of us. No.

Christ. But I can't even begin with my painful ones. I was at judo and someone did a really, they did a throat, they executed a throat very badly. And so all that happened was they lifted me up and then just dropped me really badly onto my back. So I didn't even have time to, like, break for it. I just landed onto my back. And I was winded by it.

Yeah. That was bad because I couldn't breathe and I couldn't. And I landed on the small of my back really badly. So my legs didn't really want to work either because everything had just been like my boy was, oh, it was like a reboot. Like, oh, we better not do anything for a bit and then see what's going on in a few minutes. So I had to be like sort of limp to my car. I was carried out to my car to go home. And I was just sort of like scared, I remember.

And I was just annoyed by it as well So there were tears because I was like angry about it as well I remember it was the Wheat Morphor 3 had come out Because I just remember thinking I'd go home, fucking play cod or something But I don't know what the most pain Nothing crazy painfuls ever happened to me I have one that's popping up in my head

It was when Argy had meningitis So he was trying to eat shit all the time And I was on a walk with him and he tried to eat some shit off the floor and I put my hand in his mouth to try and get it out and I managed to get my finger nail underneath the back teeth those teeth that on dogs are designed to like

grind bone apart and he bit down full force on my finger and it was so painful it felt it was similar to you know when your finger gets crushed in a door or whatever that full force fuck me it was so painful

I've seen more like pain things happen to people I didn't hit him no I've seen more painful things happen than to people than I've had actually done to me Like I've seen my brother got his hands Shut in a boot, his fingers shut in the boot car Fuck I can't believe that that happened

Yeah it was absolutely ridiculous But it was just so stupid that that had happened I'm being like angry about like Yeah The fuck is wrong with you That had happened to Not at him but Yeah

That's that blunt force Yeah and he was really upset. I remember I was in the car and the cigarette lighter I was like three or four apparently the cigarette I looked at it and I was like

why is it look and it doesn't work you can like just touch it if you want so of course I touch it turns out it just fucking work so I just put my finger straight onto one of those old cigarette light in an old car I remember the ones

and it just burned like I could see the imprint of it on my finger as well as my fingerprint just like scorched around all the skin where yeah that hurt my mom accidentally put cigarette ash onto my hand when I was it was an accident it wasn't yeah she did it on purpose but I was sat on a wall outside my house she doesn't even smoke

anymore she stopped I think quite soon after that um and I had my hands either side of me I must have been like six or something and she just well like looking we're waiting to be picked up someone just tapped the cigarette and the ash landed on my hand that hurt when I was a wee boy little burn yeah James you got one I have a tiny scarf Okay. It's split between drowning and having a chunk taking out of my foot. What do you mean?

Explain the first one, drowning. I was a young kid being, I just accidentally jumped in deep end, sucked in those water, hit the bottom, passed the fuck out, woke up. What the fuck? You've never told me that? I woke up on the side and the amount of just water that I just threw up. And that was really painful. The pain of just like not breathing for so long and then just like...

How old were you? Seven? Seven-ish. You jumped in the deep end and... I fucking, I drowned. Where? You didn't actually drown. Where?

No, I was at the bomb. And bypassed out. Fucking Christ. And then my sister pulled me out and then there's the time where it's a jar episode where I crashed from it, but I took a chunk out of my leg. Oh, yeah. That's the type of pain where you physically can't scream because it's that agonizing where you can't, you don't have anything. Yeah. But then, then it's like, it's burning as well under an exhaust pipe.

And there's a... You're trapped. Quite literally, if the fuel hit the exhaust pipe, I would have burned to death. Because the fuel would have united and I'd be trapped under a burning motorcycle. And I've permanently fucked the entire ligament up my leg. So if I do any extreme exercise, I can't walk. And the James wins that round. Let's not to slam your foot onto the fucking death.

The scarron is still there. The scarron is very visible there. It's still completely away there because it's much a chunk. It's healed a lot, though. It has healed a lot, but it's like there's permanent damage to my leg. Honorable. mention though um calf cramps oh i get those i had one of those the other night yeah i have one the other night when they wake you up and you're just delirious yeah and i i just lie there like i

can't move because it hurts so bad yeah i guess that's what you think of it like with it like what happens is i'll go to stretch out so i'll do this yeah i can already feel it i'll be on it you want to cramp you want to cramp you want to cramp right now you've got to immediately do that yeah counteract it i actually i never knew to do that and Until you guys were like, fuck. Because I was like, thing. I was like, what would relax the muscle there? Do that.

Yeah, you've got to do the opposite. Yeah, do the opposite of what is, yeah. Now, like, they get rid of them instantly. It's just boop. Yeah, because every morning when I wake in it, I stretch out. And I'm like, oh, I have to stop. I always say, I get their leg cramps quite often as well. Yeah, I get them.

Probably because I used to get them a lot. I used to get this thing where it felt like the soul of my foot was tearing through the middle. Every time I'd walk, it felt like it was splitting. That was a weird one. It's probably something to do with, I'm flat-footed. So it's probably sent to do with that. Well, that was a good question. Christ, I'm amazing.

Yeah, it was. Nothing terribly painful has happened to me as we discovered. I'm a walking. Fucking disaster. Definitely. Everettto 21 asks, if each jar member was a David Bowie era slash album, what would they be in why?

James House replied saying, Jim is heroes, Ruben is Black Star. Alex is Ziggy, James. his prince what does he mean by david bowie era like which character yeah like characters oh right am i black star just because of the fucking name because that's so boring everyone gets their own like zany thing it's like rubin whose defining trait is he's mixed race i'd hope it it wasn't that i would really hope it was something else black star wasn't really a character no it was just like i'm david bow and i'm done well the question was era or album yeah what what

about david bowie prince what we can have to explain this one to me It's just me doing it I thought it was the ghost I don't know James is Aladdin Sane I don't know James was a thin white Duke if you ask me Well that works as well

Aladdin Sane Ah shit White Duke you would have looked like that as well Just more like James That was his fascist character I guess that one is James actually Well done James with a thin white Duke

I'm let's down and Alex is the creepy dog thing from Diamond Dogs Okay now What is 9 inch nails are you Nobody cares This is an interesting question from Billy is the best jarper At what age do you think you were the coquier slash

Thought you knew everything 16 Um 19 No it is a toss up 16 to 19 prick I don't think I've ever thought

that I've known everything No Not literally But like acted the most like Thought you know You knew more than everyone else Or like walked into a room and thought Man I'm the shit

I've literally never know That's fucking horses It's not true I've never done that 16 17 18 I just I was actually quite When were you the biggest cunt then in what sense like been a cunt to people

no when when you look into yourself do you think you were like the most unreasonable most arrogant twat but I wasn't I was the opposite of arrogant though I was like too far the other way like introverted to the point where like arrogance was so far gone that it wasn't even like in my mind no but there's gotta be a time

there has to be a time everyone has a time where they're just like the shittest version version of them so yeah but the shitter's version of myself was when I was 17 18 but that wasn't because I was arrogant it was because it was the opposite where I had no confidence to the point where I no but I wasn't I wasn't confident but I still thought I was cleverer than like well that's the thing you develop that complex don't you were because you feel a bit shitter in yourself you then develop a fence we're like actually on clever and I'm kind of

fucking awesome I'm so fucking sick I mean it didn't last long it it was like the um summer between year 11 and 12 For me it was always in the summers It was peaks and troughs It was like the more I was away from certain people The bigger prick I became And then the moment

I was around other people Or certain people in certain places It was all like oh now I'm grounded again I guess just normal Right Yeah it was peaks and troughs Mine's completely different Yeah what about you James

When I was probably nine Eight You thought you knew everything James always was an early developer No no I'm not saying It's not about being clever being the worst I was a fucking bully

who used to pick on people I was a terrible person That's a very introspective of you James Yeah We've been just been like that since forever so No I'm consistent at least Yeah For every horrible thing I say

You know that If genuinely it mattered I'd probably be like Yeah you have to come out with something nice It's come up with the biggest Dick in jar Yeah I bet it's really smooth

And nicely shit It is nicely shaped. Thank you, Reuben. I don't actually know that. He's just declared it right now. Who? James just declared his dick is nicely shaped. Well, from the peoples I've seen for my year. Not different.

Anyway, antibody hijinks asks, question for James. Yay. Will you be buying the new Call of Duty modern warfare? Has the return to modern warfare enticed you? Yes. Or has Activision's general scuminess and previous wank games turned you off forever? I don't care about Activision. Have you seen what Modern Warfare looks like?

It looks incredible. I'm a hardcore cod player. I'm definitely buying... That's it, just break the mics. I'm definitely buying it. What did you do? Nothing. He's just fiddling and undoing everything.

What the fuck have he done to it? Oh, he just unscrewed one of the, like... Oh, it's only a shield. It's just extra weight. This will move fast to side to side without it. What I'm saying, James? Yes, I'm buying cod. I'm probably going to pre-order it.

I'm probably going to play it nonstop until I get... Then a month later, you... would be like, that name's sacked. I'll hit like, I'll hit seventh prestige and I'll be done. You know what? I might buy it. Jim's definitely buying.

I knew Jim's going to buy it. No, shut the fuck up. No, I fucking knew it. I have not legitimately, like, bought a cod game since Modern Warfare 3. So I think it's quite fitting. What did I buy? What was it? No, I mean, like, new cod game at the time.

I haven't. I don't think I ever bought them when they were new. Yeah. no the last one was at christmas when the christmas one warfare three came out yeah i got it for christmas the last one i got new was advanced warfare because kevin spacy campaign i really came back to bite them i played possibly no world war two i've not played that's the that's the mostly someone i bought yeah yeah because i like world war two yeah so i think it'll be quite fitting to get uh modern warfare yeah warfare if jim gets it i'll get it i'll get it i'll

get it oh wait so if I get it you're all gonna get it James will get it all gonna get it maybe the outer worlds can wait oh fuck off I just get both doom can't wait I kind of want doom a lot okay let's do a quick talk about dude just listen to the soundtrack on Spotify and then just imagine playing it so he needs to do just imagine super violence to the music is doom good Alex yeah why why do you go put it on me dog because I want you to speak the truth what why is it going Alex I've got the 9.5 game of points I got I need the truth. I've finished the first doom.

You know, yeah, but the first doom was from like... The reboot. It's got the same name. He said the reboot, all right. James, don't be difficult. Ooh. Sorry? But the soundtrack is 10 out of 10.

Soundtrack is very good. Soundtrack is very good. 10 out of 10? The game... I like the game a lot. I thought it was good fun. I haven't played it because Jimboed it when I wanted it. It left no impression on me.

It should. That's all, but whatever. I get why it does for some. yeah for like ignorant I don't know if I will buy it new or anything I'm a little bit I have no idea what games but usually I decide the night before and I'm like yeah

games have been really shit right lately Raged 2 um oh yeah young blood yeah holy fuck that sounds bad because doom will hopefully be the best one we've seen the quality of doom

it's same people like whatever it'll be good it's not from like a B team and also it's yeah it's not like it's not one of those games it's gonna be the peak it's just not what I care about in games though, like it...

I don't care about the the world really of Doom at all but not only that, but like in my experience of the game it does nothing to shake things up ever It does within its confines already, like it's confines a very confined

you get all like different abilities and new weapons and shit if you're not already into the gameplay loop from the first level it's not going to compel you might just not be for you it's not for you, it's not for me. And I can accept that. And that's why it's shit. I'm not buying

the new one. I don't care. Jamie's just won on every level with human intelligence. You couldn't even finish it. I didn't get to play it. I know Alex finished as well. But yeah, with any ones that I finished? Yeah, I finished it. I tried like three times and it was just born.

It took me of many tries. It took me like three years from the first date of creating a stage. I didn't finish it for a long time. But I didn't own it at any point. So it was always just like random bursts of fancy playing it. but you want to play do you want to buy the new dreams so i don't get that mostly i just get hyped about the idea of ultraviolence and music

i just listen to music that's yeah i don't think i will buy it is the thing immediately because usually of games it's never the one i think i'll buy it's just some fucking random i'll get that so you'll just buy out of worlds and you'll love it or i'll buy it and then you'll love it like rich are playing game past dude i'll buy it on pc because i'm a new PC Reborn gaming? I'm a PC Reborn gamer but I just don't have a That's why we're more gamer

That's where yeah No get a lot of gatekeepers Go gate keep some Alright Jim let's keep some gates What about I could play games on my PC But I choose not to That makes you more of a loser Is there an actual question we can answer

Because we've just been rambling about bullshit now Sorry for the past eight minutes probably This has been complete nonsense It's been like three Acrylic alloy If you could make one animal extinct So without any environmental consequences, what would you do? Wasps?

If so, what animal and why? No, no, not wasps. Mosquitoes. Oh, holy. Things, no. Yeah, because they give you malaria and shit. My worry about... Ticks.

Tics. My worry about mosquitoes is that you remove them, population... Yeah. Population control. Population of what? Humans. Population control. Yeah, they are malaria.

And shit. do you know how many people in that part of the world yeah exactly dying of malaria here i don't want fine pinnets get rid of ticks maybe just wasps though wasps are scarier they are horrid but they're also quite easy to kill it's the thing they are quite i've never like had an actual like man wasps are an issue in my life well i mean i have with yeah mosquitoes and ticks and all this shit i have a wasp story okay turtles story panders no actually what's a really like cute thing from new zeal what's a really cute oh kiwis all right well then they're gone key no um actually though all their stupid birds i was in austria one summer and in

this part of austria we were in and because i was with my uncle auntie who go there every year you know for a long time you know each summer and they were saying well yeah the wasps can be better or worse sometimes i'm not here at all and the one summer i went they were saying this is actually the worst we've ever seen it. There were just the fucking wasps everywhere. You couldn't sit down and eat anywhere or drinking it because wasps would be just all over it. You couldn't. It was awful.

And I was just a whole time. I couldn't relax in this holiday when I was like 15. Because all I could think about was getting stung by a wasp. The thing is I haven't been stung by anything since I must have been four. I've got an insect bite on the side of my like foot right now, but... That doesn't count.

I'm thinking stings like B-W-W-W-W-W-W-B. just never ever been stunted so mine goes to parasitic animals yeah but you don't get them as often I think you do worms constant problem all throughout the world I don't know my last time I'm

me when did you last have worms Jim do you look at your poo I would get rid of something like ticks because wasps are easy to kill aren't they? No but like you're string of wasps and tearing them limb from limb is fun it is yeah need that in our lives no we don't was it we need fear am I correct in

thinking that recently scientists discovered that insects do feel pain. They feel actually searing pain at the point of death. It is awful the pain that they feel when they die like the same as a human. Yeah. So why did you kill them? Because they're smaller than us. Because they're fucking horrible and they're small than me.

That makes you a bad person. No it doesn't. It just means fuck them. They should have been born as one of me. Bruh. That's the Buddhist way. I don't go out of my way to attack people. Like the way wasps do that. It's just the circle of life, man. I didn't know my way to attack people to secondary school.

If they were like, you did. What about this predatorial ancient birds that came about after the dinosaurs? These fucking 10-foot birds that were run around, just killing anything they could. That sounds like what seagulls do to Chihuahuas. Did you read that story a few weeks ago? Yeah, yeah, no, I did, yeah. That's like funny. If seagulls could kill humans, they would.

They would. Yeah, but then everyone would be armed of swords and guns to kill the fuck. I'm going out to the shop. Have you got your fucking assault rifle? Yeah. Speaking of animals feeling horrible pain. I've got a quick story about Billy. Oh God.

It was actually so fucked up what she did. So she'd been hunting this like mouse rat, either baby rat or a mouse. Right. And she'd got it to the point where it was hiding around this plant pot. And she like put her two front paws up on the plant pot, tilted it up. and then it went under the plant pot and then she let go what the fuck did she

and it landed on the rat mouse thing she's really terrifyingly and it started screaming what did you do did you put it out of his misery misery no like just let her do what she had to do to it no i i'm i'm pretty sure we saved that one because that was fucked up too far like i don't know if she did it intentionally or she probably worked out i can move this yeah she must have worked it out it was they must get like pleasure from screaming and shit she is one fucked up motherfucker she did have a pretty bizarre like first few like weeks of her existence so yeah true complete psyche yeah she's just completely turned it into a Well, I think that's it, fellas.

We've done it. 181. 182, baby. Oh, also this is my last one for a while. Why? I won't be here after next Friday. Oh, okay. Oh, okay.

Well, that's how it's going to be then, I suppose. I'm pretty sure that this podcast will be the one, the Monday after I have then moved. Yes? I don't know. It's so far in the future. Yes. It will be. But I'm sure we'll work a way out because, like, now I won't be back anywhere near.

is often at all really for as long anyway we'll work something out well thanks for tuning into this episode we'll see you on the next one fellas and ladies I'll be ripped the next time you see me

I'll be fucking ripped Basinga Basinga