Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Can we say the word slit?

Episode Date: September 9, 2025

Ducko runs us through an acting class and Producer Babs gets some life advice from the rice cookers!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Monopoly at Maccas is back. Play only in the app. Ends October 14. For full terms, visit McDonald's.com.com. This is the Jess and Douggo podcast. Hello, friends, family, foes and everyone in between. Welcome to the potty. How many foes do you reckon are listening to the pod?

Well. Keep your enemies close. Yeah. No, keep your friends close, but your enemy's closer. So people out there hating on us keeping up to date. There'd be a few other radio announcers listening to see one of those. I remember that guy who commented. on the Kyle and Jackie O getting in trouble.

And he said, Jess and Ducker, you guys are next. Maybe he'd be listening to get a running tally of naughty things we say so then he can go to the tribunal and try and get us cancelled. Isn't that funny that? Like Kyle and Jackie are getting in trouble doing some peeing thing with their producers who were trying to work out who's we was who. Oh, that's right. I couldn't even remember what the thing was.

And someone on their comments totally gets our show and goes, Your Next. Thousands of comments tagged us. I don't think all the shows around the country. Any radio show. We're, you know, we're not the top one and then they just, they hit us. Which just makes me wonder, what was it? What was it?

It could be accumulation, but I just feel like this energy, there was one thing. It was something that happened. And he wasn't. You know what I reckon it was? It could have been. I reckon he was. Or I'm going to constantly talk about Shagga's massive dick. I don't know.

Yeah, that could be a build-up. Geez, he'd have a lot to tally up for that one. Content warning. God day warning Yeah, that's right I forgot about that Was all parts like Because he's a foe

Offended but also like Kind of like flatted Like well Same Same and there's Yeah Equal parts for me Wanting to ask more questions

Of him And equal parts Not wanting to poke the bear Yeah But yes When we talk about foes He'd have to be on the list He might be leading our

Our foe Our foe chat Whatever the opposite Of fan club Yeah Fo club The foe club It writes itself

It really does Folclub and fan club He's just the only one If you're that guy Yeah. No, I don't want to. You don't want to, I'm going to say message. I'm just curious.

You reckon he's still listening? Great. Wow, that's why. You're the one who greeted the foes. Yeah, who were you thinking of? So true. Yeah, no, him. Yeah, very much just him.

I was actually just thinking of you are, like, maybe other announcers who were like, who were gunning for us? Yeah. You know, the sharks always circle. Ah, well, there's blood in the water in this industry at all times. You are never safe. At risk of you playing the sting. Here we go.

I don't even know what the name of the movie's called. How is this for a niche one? Yeah. That movie with Blake Lively, and she's the only one on that rock being circled for two hours. Yeah, I don't know that's cool either. Like, that's the analogy. I actually never saw that, but I heard horrible things. Same.

I watched it. I can confirm. Yeah, it was bad. The shallows. The shallows. Yeah, yeah. Well, because it's an exciting premise. Just Blake Lively.

Gorgeous for two hours on a screen. There's not a lot going on. She has sex with the two guys and she's like constantly dating. She's like with them both. What's that movie? What is that? That's Aaron Taylor Johnson and. Strangers or is it like?

Yeah, I think they lived, they live like above each other and she's goes in between? One of them makes love and one of them fucks. That's literally the voice of us. Savages. That's literally the voice out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that movie I enjoyed.

I got around that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's that other one with Reese Witherspoon, and she's also caught in between, and it's the two spies, and they're both trying to win her affections. Oh, yeah. What's that one, shy guy?

Here we go, come on, quick fingers. A little shy, thing, thing. One of them's really hot. This means war? Yes. Yeah. Who's Bain? Tom?

Hardy. Hardy. He's in that. See what I googled to get those. last in the Rovers. Go, because you were unbelievable fast. Blake Lively has sex with two guys. Bang, got it.

Savages. Yeah. And then spies with Rees Ruther's Boon. This means war. This means war. You know what really disappointed me today? You and Shagai Babs have really disappointed me. We're talking about 60 seconds.

A movie that's like, I think it's two hours. And then I was saying how good laws Babs is like, my mom said I should watch it. We're talking about. And then Babbs like, oh, it's two hours. I'm not watching that. And then Shagga's like, oh, that movie's an hour and a half. I guess like, that's doable. It's too.

What? And 90 minutes. It's the classic thing. It's not that I have anything else to do. I know, which is what's even more disappointers. No, but it's that classic thing. I'm sure, Shagat, correct me if I'm wrong. You'd watch six episodes of your favorite show back to back.

But committing to a movie feels so much. Because I know when the episode's over, I can stop. It's killing the film industry. Like, eventually the films are going to die. Because of this mentality. Babbs, you like, you like content. You like good shows and good movies. Nah, she likes three second content on a constant scroll.

No, my argument is I can't watch movies during the week because then I feel like I have to finish them, which means that I stay up late. Yeah, I'm not a during the week movie watch really, yeah. So I will watch it, but when I have a free weekend. I appreciate you have to stay up late. Why are you starting at 8.30 p.m. and not at 5.30 p. That's true. This is my routine. This is why.

Here we go. It's because I have a very strict routine of a nighttime. It's a bit crazy. Tell us. So I go for a walk at like exactly 3 p.m. every day. And that's your, that's your. No, that's my music. audio-free walk where I just like become one with nature.

What's that called? Unplugged. I unplug. Then I come home and so it's about four o'clock and then usually like I just chill out for half an hour like read a book and then I'll think about showering. So then I'll have dinner at like 6pm. Showering before dinner. Yeah. That's interesting to me. I do that. Do you? Yeah, shower before dinner and you can eat dinner and then clean your teeth go to bed. I think I just assume I'm going to get slop on myself. So I should shower the very last thing. I'll be all like on the couch.

If shout, everything's done, you just eat, then you have a tea, and you go to bed. Because I'm naturally so sweaty. Having a tea makes me freaking hot. So I got to, it's got to be the last thing. Okay, yeah. But then I have to. So you're cleaned for dinner. Yep.

And then so by the time I'm finished dinner, it's like 6.30. Have you already decided what you're making, what you haven't? Yes. Yeah. I, like, I planned my groceries a week before. But then I have to be like laying in bed reading at 8 p.m. So. Yeah.

I need to have a good routine. This is a good routine. And when do you want it to watch corn in 60s? Exactly. It's got to be Friday night. Even if I start at 6.30, it won't be done by 8. Yeah, it's got to be the weekend, I guess. Wow, okay, well, Friday night, we'll send a group text.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you watch? No, she's going to Melbourne this weekend. Yeah. Okay, next week. Are you away Friday then? I am, yeah. Okay, that was her way of telling us without telling us before? I'm going to Melbourne this weekend.

I was like, I was just waiting for her to go. To be fair, better than old mate over who doesn't tell us shit. What are you doing this weekend? Nothing come Monday. Oh, I had the best weekend of my life. I didn't say that. Well, you may as well have. You did have a great weekend.

You didn't even tell us about it. I want one bit of content a week out of you. Actually, Ducko, should we? On air meeting. Personals. On air meeting. We built the blog. I'll throw Boss Jace into this.

We built Babs' blog to get more out of this young creature who has so much to offer but was holding back. So we built a whole segment. I understand he's got dips. I understand he does some other games. Why isn't he under the same? Yeah, content microscope. Yeah. I appreciate you're reading Al Jazeera and the Mumbai Times to bring us.

We'll give you one of the one. One a week. Topicals. One a week at any day, any day you want. Oh, no, but don't fucking throw it like you did the bloody shy guys' leftovers and get canned from the board. That was not my idea. Yeah, but you suck that delivery.

It's got scraps. I can't do stories that he reads, but maybe a story that's a personal. If I don't do anything, so I won't be delivered. No, no, but you always say that and then miraculously. It was a 30th. We hung out, had dinner. Well, this is called being in radio. What did you eat?

As a producer, that's not interesting. What did you eat? There was pizzas Where'd you go? It was at a property Did you have to pay? No Did you get a gift?

Yes Gift card For both of them or joint? For both of them It was a restaurant gift card thing Gift cards for parties Yes or no See already we've got a conversation

We're talking We're talking We're learning about you We can deliver that once a week Ten bucks are fucking Ten bucks we do one of them And it gets scrapped We'll still give it a go

I don't think it's fair that Babs is doing so much mining her own life and all he does he does is get some grabs for a year of the song which is once a fortnight now by the time do. Do you want to leave in a list

the games that I do? We should follow up with that I'm scared of chewing stuff tomorrow like we should be a phone topic on it. You think that's exciting? No. Did I do it anyway? Yes. Why are you coming at me? Jace wanted you to do it. To give yourself credit it was exciting. It was interesting.

And we found out you're a bit of a psycho. Yes. She's complex. What do you want to do? tomorrow? More on the misophonia? Yeah, just like, yeah, maybe... Or irrational anger. Yeah, rational anger. A rational anger. I like irrational anger. What makes you a rationally angry?

Because I think we've touched on irrational fears, but a rational anger. People who lack spatial awareness just fuck me off. Oh my God, that annoys me too. I just can't handle it. We need ATM rules for any cue. I don't need you breathing down my neck while we're both waiting to pay for our headphones at J.B. Highfire. Let's do a rational anger.

I like irrational anger. Yeah, that's fun. See, shy guy, this is called Making Radio. Off a little tidbit. Is that a little bit? similar to what we did on Monday? What are we doing? Jalable offence.

Jailable for. He was similar, similar to me. That's my opinion. You could do, like, what phobia do you have that's a bit weird? Yeah. You could even, yeah, are you doing, a phobia? So it was it left of centre phobias. Yeah, yeah, do we focus on that?

I don't know. It's called brainstorming shy guy. Such a poo-poo-o-a. Are you, you said we're having an on-air meeting. The meeting's still continuing. Oh, yeah. So he's not going to like anything now. He's just a poo-poo-up.

Yeah. You know what, 3V-1. and surely we out rank him. And Babbs controls the board. She does. Just write it on the board. Babes controls the board based on what I've written. Yeah, we know.

And when the computer's wig out, instead of communicating, Babbs was like, no, I want to write. The steam coming out of her ears. Maybe, maybe we do. Babs, you wrote the wrong way. No, shy, I was shy guy right. Babs just writes whatever she's thinking sometimes. That's why we can't talk about things while she's riding the board.

That's right. 620, it's always tears. Like, what? What? Tears. Tears, tears. Wet down my thighs. What, perhaps, Jesus.

Well, maybe we do something on the phobias. What's your phobia? Yeah, what's your, do you have a phobia? Like, people who are scared of birds. Yep, yep. Weird phobias. Like, my irrational phobia of my Achilles tendons being touched. That's right.

Remember that time I took a pair of scissors still? That was fucked. Well, you threaten me with a bucket of octopause. I think about that. A bucket of purse. Are you afraid of pus? Massively. I've told you this.

I'm a titing. I'm a titing. Let's get one in here. We should. You've done it once before. The gag's over. We didn't do it, though. We pretend it.

We sat in a bucket. She's like, doho, doho, no, no. I will break you. That's what she's like, I will break you. That's why I'm not friends with Sophie anymore. Because I think she just, once she was able to get away from me, she went, that was fucked. You threatened my life?

Because we know fish people. We could get. Yes. You reckon Kyle from Finn Vision has access to an octopus. Do you reckon we could get a pus away from me? Do you reckon we could get a, um, a mini puss for the tank? I don't want a mini push. Yuck.

In the tank. I don't think it would work. No, but you know how octopuls are jerks. Like they punch fish for no reason. Yeah, yeah, they're bad. You want that in the tank. Kind of. I want to see who's fish.

The puss is going to bully your fish. Not my fish, mate. You can't bully something that's already down the bottom. That thing is, that thing's not getting bullied. It has nothing to live for. Oh, they're fucking gross. No, please. I can't be in the same vicinity.

How are our fish? I actually haven't had a look at them for a while. They're great. Are we going to name any ruskos after them? Oh, yeah. Where are we out of that? One of them actually did die. We don't know.

No, well, I thought they were going to be to... No, they're the rice cookers. Yeah, we're going to name the random wrong rice. Yeah, yeah. Hey, how's that stowaway? I haven't seen her for a while. She's fine. She's fine.

Everyone's just vibrating in there, you know? Babs has quit a nice little ecosystem. She really has. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How do you feel when shy guy does a little clean? Does that irk you? It irks me when he comes out. He's like, have you fed them yet?

Have you fed them yet? And I'm like, no, and he's like, I'm doing it. That's an unbelievable impression, by the way. That was bang on. Was that shy guy? Yeah. I closed my eyes and I thought it was him. Who was speaking to us then?

Feeding them is the fun job, the rewarding job. I know, and then he does it. I'm like, can I? Can I feed him? Oh, yeah. Hang on, you don't even fucking say hello to them and you want to feed them. You can't take that off of him. Dad is home, kids.

Do you get to clean the fish tank in a couple of weeks? Nah, fuck out. You're the dad that works away. Your Fifo dad? You've flown in. Oh, this guy. It's me, Papa. And they're all like, oh, hey, dad.

I'm so excited to see you. It's like, okay, fuck you. I've been taking care of you the whole time. I've been keeping you alive. It's just like your normal household dynamic, isn't it, Bab? Yeah. It's like you with everything. Oh my God, actually, do you know what happened the other day?

What happened? Sorry, after I got home from being away all weekend, I hadn't seen Lucy the whole time, and she walks into their house and goes, oh, hey, where's Lottie? I said, oh, am I not good enough? She's like, oh, I just want to know where Lottie is. And I was like, oh, well, fuck, okay. You are the mom. Yeah.

It's because they're coughing and you're fucking leaving the house for a week. Did they notice you were good? Yeah, they noticed. Because no one cleaned up, no one cooked. Do you go out and party with them or hang out socially with them? Yeah, sometimes. We went to the farmer's market all together, I saw the other day. Yeah, yeah.

Snap to pick. And we go, like, out sometimes. But I also have other friends. You know? Yeah. You just put so little on social media. We don't know what you do in your spare time. Yeah, look on Jessand do.

Yeah, look on Jessandoco. Yeah, she tells them people at pubs. What do you do? Oh, like, you'll see it on Jess and dachas. You probably on Babs. My colleagues fart every so often and guess each other sounds. I'm in the background of those pictures. Rolling my eyes.

According to Pillow Talk, your bubs. Isn't she gags? You know, and gabs and gabs and gats. We've got a huge team, apparently, according to phillots. Good recall. Yeah, Craig. Oh, anyway. So where do we land on it?

Oh, yeah, the phone topic. No, shy guy sharing more. Yeah, you got to share more. Tomorrow, I want some content from you. Don't worry, you'll do one and it'll get scrapped. I'll tell you what, I've burned a few today. I actually did have the 1980 slang terms that I was going to deliver. Well, that was a story, but yeah, you can do that again.

Yeah, well, I'm going to deliver. Yeah, well, I'm going to deliver it. view content. Personal. I don't do anything. I don't have any personal. But that's why I think it's funny because we could do like

Shagga's mundane life chats. Yes. And you know what? The challenge is on us. Yeah, to get something out of it. Let's make it out. We'll do it. We'll break you down your day.

What did you do yesterday, Shagga? Let's walk through it. We'll take them. Because is that what boss Jason has to you Babs? Genuinely just makes you go through stuff and then pick a thread. Yeah.

And he'll sometimes ask me weird questions like, has anything happened with this certain friend. Oh, my God. Or, like, do you have, did this happen? Like, it's really funny. God, I wish I was in those meetings with you and Jays. It'd be so funny.

Duck, I'll bring in some hard hats because we're going on mining, baby. Oh, we're going deep. We're going to deep into shark. I got a head torch. You can bring a pickax? Can you bring a pickax? There's a reason those conversations has done off air. I've got a hatchet.

Not interesting. Well, if you're not going to do it for us, it has to happen on it. I want you to be honest, too, though. Don't just say nothing when really think back on and go, oh, actually, no, I did do that. Like, in the moment. I would tell you, or I'd, I just don't do any, ask anyone that knows me. We can't, you've not introduced us to anyone in your life. Never, we don't, we don't meet your house.

The other loop? Who the fuck is that? When are we all going to hang out socially? Have a beverage. Great question. Have a beverage. Well, actually, we, we were invited to a lunch that we keep. Oh, yeah, it's really hard to sink up our situation.

Oh, yeah. That's awesome. I noticed that died. Yeah, yeah, where did that go? I can, I mean, I reckon if we're doing a lunch like that, the best would be Thursday or Friday. Thank you. I couldn't do. I think the last day was a Wednesday.

For me and Babbs. Well, Friday. Friday. If we can get a Friday ahead of time, you know what I mean? Friday it is. God forbid we interrupt their March a Diary Day. Not this Friday though, because I'm going to know. Oh, Babbs is you here.

Oh, that's off. Okay. What about next Friday, Babs? You free? Uh, what's the date? The 19th. I can't do the 19th. It's the day after roast chicken.

Oh, I deleted that from my calendar. Oh, it's sad, isn't it? The 19th I can't do. Oh, you know who I'm having lunch with that day? Who? Who? Who? Who, who's having a date with her?

Yeah, we're having a date. I saw you can't do it because of that. Yeah. It's already, we've booked it in. I'm not canceling on Linda. No, I've booked in something for the 26. No, I've got my sister's. This is why we got on.

It's not on me. I got my sister's wedding. So, show-down, you want to go out for the first? What about a Thursday then? Well, it has to be after midday. Yeah, it's a lunch. It's like one, one-thirty. Yeah, I could do a one-thirty.

I could do one-thirty. Next Thursday on the 18th, in memory of the roast chicken day. That's actually pretty cute. Done. One-thirty. You know, I'm going to change my blow away for you. Yes. Hang on, but can we confirm the menu?

Because I just don't believe you that they don't have nothing but seafood. Okay, they're a new client. Yeah, they are. Okay, can we just check that they've got something that I'll eat? I'm going to put in lunch with the team, 1.30. You go back and you're going to sort it out, shall I go? Yeah, Babsville. That's her job.

Are we going to have a couple of cockies? I'm going to go pick up the kid from daycare. I can have one cocky. That's all we have anyway. Lots of bread. Yeah, we can all have a cosmo. There you go. Oh, cute.

Let's do our own hit boarding lounge. But also let me see the menu first There you go Lunch with team Done That'll come back Oh that was an offer two weeks ago It's expired

Yeah never mind Yeah We'll put up a nice photo Look at that Does it take you that long To do the diary Plus everything else Do you not know what we do

No I really don't care I'll see you for lunch I Tuckin'all in the morning Stop what you're doing And listen You know I got that shit

that you like. There's only one show to wake up with you. I'm not that easy to tang. Jess, Jess. You just go, bip-p-p-b-b-b-b-b-poo-poo-poo. I actually haven't seen my dad's butt in a while. Got him going insane. Yes, I got.

Your hole was well over. Babs. Babs. I've never had hemorrhoids. Look, yeah, I'm talking. This is Jess and ducco. Right on 6 o'clock. Welcome to Tuesday morning, team.

Good morning. It's the 9th of the 9th. The 9th of the 9th, 25. Feels nice to say, the 9th of the 9th. Yes. Maybe it's your birthday, maybe you're getting married. It's a great date. Ninth and the 9th is a good date.

Don't you feel it for the 9th of the 9th? Good. You know, I didn't realize we were this deep into September already. Oh, I know. It's just going, isn't it? It's final season, baby. It's a vapid. You know, if you're getting burned in September, you're doing something right.

Absolutely. On the footy field. Absolutely. Yeah, it is final season. Hey, a couple of big weekends of sport coming. Absolutely. Yes. You know, a couple of people celebrating their mad Mondays.

Oh, yeah, fair few. They're out. Fair few. They're out of the comp. They'd be going through right now some Mad Mondays. In fact, our mate, Adam Elliott, because we know the night's got the spoon, he was meant to, you know, obviously we're waiting for the birth of his child. He went to Mad Monday.

I saw her on Instagram yesterday. That's right. His wife posted, because she'd be 40 plus now, posted, if this doesn't send me into labor, I don't know what will. And it was Adam dressed as a jockey next to her humongous belly. Yeah. Imagine if he, because you know him. He'll go.

He's all or nothing, our boy, Adam. Waters are broke. We're going to the hospital. rolls in maggot from Mad Monday. I don't, like, do you even answer your phone when you're that deep? Imagine missing that call because you're doing, I don't know, belly shots off your team mate. I'm not sure how Mad Mondays work.

You're doing the bubbler into each other's mouths. You get it. Mad Monday stuff. I've seen one. That's right. Well, you have to. And he'd roll into the hospital. It would be a great story.

I know you asked him last time he was visiting if he was getting in on the action like you did with the hands on hands. Was he going to be at the business end? And he did say, no? I'll be up at the holding hands. Dabbing brows. You definitely don't want him down the business end if he's 15 schooners deep. Maybe he'll go down there now, though.

Maybe he'll just chum down here. And I know he's an athlete. I know he's a professional sportsman. Are you trusting those catching hands when you're that deep? When you're that, when you're that, when you're that, sourced. Oh, geez. I don't think you would. I don't think you would.

Oh, he might take over. He might be like, look, I've got this from here. I've seen videos. Just hip and shoulder the obstetrician out of the way. Here you go, push, honey. Oh, geez. I kind of hope that he did have to get called in really drunk. As we said, it could be any day now.

Yeah, it really could be. Go-N-Monday is, like, I understand him wanting to do it, but him getting allowed to do it. Do you think, Ducco, there's an element? Because, yes, you're absolutely right. Do you think there's an element because she's also an athlete? She's also a sports star. She understands.

Because I give you a hot tip. You wouldn't know. No, why? I didn't let Angus go further than about a 5K radius. It gets to that point. He's like, I'm going to go to Woolworth. I went, no, you're not. Do a delivery.

You're staying right. Even, just moaning on the couch. Because I didn't want to go out. We went to a wedding when I was, I think, 38 weeks. And even then, you know, the go-bags in the car, this and that. You don't want them out of your sight. No, you want to keep them close. I don't want to be alone in that moment.

Woosh. She's taking longer than we anticipated, though. Absolutely. Oh, the weight would just be. Oh. The female form. I know. It'll happen when it happens.

It will. We're thinking about them. Yeah, we are. Deeply. I lost. I'm going to send a text, actually, and go, as it come, are you still have drunk? I'm going to do that now. We'll get updates.

Please do. Let's see if your replies. How many emojis and how many spelling mistakes? Good morning to you, shy guy. Good for the ninth of the ninth. Good for the ninth of the ninth. You look like you're in your element this month. This is your month.

Okay. I'll take that. I've never thought about it. Yeah. You're not doing anything consciously? Just live in your best. I don't know what that means. Consciously?

Like purposefully. I just go with the flow. I wouldn't say you go with the flow. flow. Would you? No, I wouldn't describe him as that. But hey, this is a man who has kept us at arm's length for two years, Ducco. I don't actually know that much about him.

So if he thinks he's go with the flow, maybe he is. There isn't anything else to share. That's not arm's length. He went to a 30th on the weekend. How was your 30s? You ever told us that yesterday? It was a joint thing. So two of my friends are married.

Should we got some stories from us? Do you remember asking him on Friday? What are up to this weekend? Said nothing. Thank you. He's arms and around. See, that's arms length. I had a 30th.

Huh? And you got really drunk? No, I didn't. And was it a couple, did you say? Yeah. See, that's something to talk about. Who has joint parties? Joint 30s.

Unless they've literally got the same birthday. That's weird. Have your own celebration. Wednesday. And then one's next week, maybe. Tough times. You know, you're going to share it, I guess. You got to share it.

And I guess a milestone, that's maybe big expenses to do too. Huge. Well, I think the wife's having another one, allegedly. Are you invited to that one, too? Oh, so you're mates with the guy. Yeah. Okay. Well, yeah.

Share more. Yeah, yeah. Like, watch this. Look how much this one shares. Hey, Babs, how are you for the 9th of the 9th? Good. Yeah. See, what an open book she is.

Speaking of Sherry, though, she got the legs out today. I'm doing exposure therapy for the legs. Yeah, get those. You had your knees out yesterday. You started something. Yeah, the legs are out and the pins out. Yeah. And they're so pale.

You're getting your kneecaps tanned. Gonna try. A strong gingham on the. young lady today? Yeah. Bare legs. I saw her in my Gingham skirt today or skirt dress. I went, yeah, she's getting the legs out.

It's getting hotter. Did you run her hand up her legs to check if she'd shaved? No, I certainly didn't do that. Just to see how the lasers, no, you didn't do that? Oh, okay. No, no. That would be weird. I went nowhere near.

A way to keep his arm, lame. But I did shave, so. Usually the babbs I can tell from a distance. Oh, look at those hairs. Wow, pale lady, dark hair. It's unfortunate. It's annoying. The combo that your parents have bestowed upon you genetically.

You know. It's all right. Fake tan exists. Amen. You're a big fake tanor? Not really, but sometimes. It's nice. I was going to fake tan, but I couldn't be bothered.

Yeah. You didn't look, you didn't actually look that pale on it from memory. You were blinding. It was like the moon was in the lift with us. I couldn't. Oh, Jesus. Big show team. I call it your moonbeam ice cream.

Moon beam. Okay. It is a big show, Ducky. Yeah, massive. Yep. Of course, as always, my acting class on the show today. Thank goodness, okay, last week, or Harry Potter? What have you got for us this week?

I think it had Titanic. Do we have Titanic last week? Was it Harry Potter? I think it was Harry Potter last and the Titanic before? Oh, well, we could be going in 60 seconds this week. Oh, my God. Jess and Ducko. Some pants have gone viral for Tajay. Tajay pants.

I love when Target goes viral. Target has teamed up with the sportswear brand, Champion. You're champion? I love champion. Do you? I'm not a champion fan. I knew you wouldn't be.

Because you think champion is an insult. I love champion. Yeah. Because then I write my own E in and make it champion. On all your clothes. On all my clothes. So they've teamed up with this brand. And they've got these new pants.

Only for ladies. Then there was a woman's health specialist. You can't write this stuff. Her name is Dr. Marcy Crouch. Right. Fantastic. These pants are doing something bad on the crutch.

Okay. Crouch isn't happy with what's going on in the crutch. Exactly right. So when you put these pants on, they're meant to be,

I suppose, like athleisurey pants. I mean, how much difference could there be in the legging, in the tart in the athledger world?

So this is specifically for the groin. Okay. So if I show you this photo right now, when you put the pants on. Oh, I see. So you're right,

they don't look like a legging per se. They're almost bordering on a trouser look, aren't they? Can we say the word slit on it? Yeah, yeah.

There is a, giant gaping hole in the middle and it looks a lot like a female anatomy and it seriously you can't write this stuff. What makes you say they're just for the ladies? You can't wear those? I think they'd be too much bulging out.

What's with the... Doesn't slit feel like such a dirty word? I'm okay with it. What's with it? If we know you are. What's with it? Is the fabric underneath breathable or something? I've no idea. idea. It doesn't say... I need to hear it from a spokesperson from champion.

It just says... What the design. So obviously when it's on the rack, right? Because Target's one of those places. If I'm getting a top or something from Target, I'm probably not going to try it on. I'm probably just going to buy it. Couldn't agree more. I'm probably going to buy that $25 top and be like...

And hope for the best. And at worst case, it becomes a mowing shirt or sleeping or whatever. Or shy guy's next present. Whatever. Exactly right. But this one, would you try pants on and... Pants are a different beast. I don't know if I would.

And again, anything in the ath leisure space, maybe I would. Because, you know, it's meant to be a bit more form fitting. And if it is only, like, small, medium, large, it's such a wide parameter. I just don't understand if that is a functional thing. Well, it's saying that you can't see it when they're on the rack. And then you put them on. So someone's done this, not tried them on. Come home.

And gone, oh, my goodness. Don't say come home. Yeah, you go. Literally. It looks like an entry point. Do you know where that belongs? Yeah. In the wall of Volvers.

It does. In the great museum down in Tasmania, Mona. Volvo City. Someone saying is the color camel? That's fantastic. Oh, is that what they're trying to avoid? You know that what I'm trying to avoid? From the cheap seats?

Yeah, I like that one. Is that what they're trying to avoid? You can't get camel toe in pants like that if the fabric is slit open. But, geez, everyone's going to be staring at that. Because it looks like you just got, it looks like, if you look from a distance, I would think you weren't wearing undies and it was just there. Yeah, it was just out. It was just sitting right there. Breathing.

Because, you know, they also recommend, I've had a GP genuinely look me in the eye and say don't wear knickers to the gym. You've got to let it breathe down there as much as you can. So in your leggings, you're already scrunched in there. Don't wear knickers. So if you're not wearing knickers in those. Jesus. It would just feel like,

things are going places they shouldn't. It would feel, it would be all fitting. What are they retail for? How much do they go for? It doesn't actually say. Oh, it does. It does. $30.

I mean, yes, I wouldn't have tried those on and definitely come home with it. And I'm all around the house and gone, Angus, what do you think? I'm like, whoa, you know. Geez. Watch when you dance. When I read this headline, women prefer action-oriented partners. I thought it was going to be like, Jackie Chan, do a parkour. Yeah, like action movies.

Jean-Cla-Bandem. Yeah, like adrenaline junkies. This is a good lesson in, read the article first. Oh, no, what have we got? It's about love languages. Do you even want to hear? Yeah, what do you got for me? He's in China, so thank you for taking a fair.

I just preempted that too. I know you did. Good on me. You know. I picked a country. You can smell when the study's been done. Yeah, I can smell nasty growing from a mile away. I was Indonesian, but sure.

I can smell hoikin beef. Yum. We're in China. I can smell peaking duck. Yes. Oh, good, the peaking duck pancake. I think we say that every time we come here. Dip me and hoi sit.

For the second time this show. We are consistent, if nothing else. We're in China because a new study's been done. Yes. 500 heterosexual adults. Yes. And they have deemed that women prefer men to do the acts of service over the words of affirmation. The action is the acts of service.

Action is the acts of service. Have you ever done that quiz? It's like 60 questions to determine what your... I don't know if I did the 60. Maybe it did a shorter version one. Sure. Do you remember what your love language is? I believe it is positive words of affirmation.

And is that now what you like to receive or how you like to show? Receive. That's what you like to receive. I believe. Oh, a bit of showing of that. And I don't Morgan likes acts of service. The issue is you might like to receive one thing, but what does your partner like to receive? Like, I am definitely, I'm definitely a physical touch.

To be honest, I feel like I'm all of them. But I like... Oh, geez. That's a tough carry. But I'm definitely a physical touch and a gift giving based on the survey thing I do. You're a gift giver, for sure. I think that's your main... But Angus is an acts of service.

So him doing the groceries. doing the, God, I sound like an absolute nightmare, but him doing the groceries, doing the chores, doing all this stuff. Doesn't do it for. Take it or leave it. You want a gift. I'm tickle my arm for the length of the movie. Or buy me present. Yeah, like, present. But similarly, I love

gift giving, and they're not always received that amazingly. It's sort of like, I don't need this. Moines does active service. I'm just like, here, I'm ready again. You know, like, and she's like, that's not that kind of service. You need to read this study, you're more in China. Oh, what do you mean the dishwasher? Okay.

Exactly. So this survey is saying, instead of saying, I love you, I'm here for you, I miss you, which Shy Guy will give us in Mandarin very shortly. What's his active service? What's his love language do you mean? Sorry, Shy Guy. I don't even know what they are. It definitely wouldn't be physical touch.

It definitely wouldn't be words of affirmation. It's not gifts. Could it be quality time? It could be words of affirmation. It could be like, you're doing, hey, you did a good job. Like, I think he likes when we do that stuff. Actually, you're right. Yeah.

That all time. But my issue is, like, I go, we see. say stuff like that to him often, and I don't feel like anything changes. He likes to compliment shy guy, you know, I mean, we all do. I compliment everyone. I compliment you babbs every day. No, but see again, shy guy, again, you're blurring the lines. It's what you like to receive, not what you give, what you like to receive. I think you like a few, I like a compliment.

You like knowing that you're doing a good job, when we everyone does. On occasion. Maybe I'm not doing it enough. I never see a smile. I never see a glint. I never see anything behaviorally changed. Babs, what shy guys? You see him more than anyone.

Good question. Well, he's, he's, he's, he's, I'm taking it all for myself. He's got none. Okay, all right. But anyway, maybe you can do, carve out some time today, do the 60 question quiz. It's literally called love languages and see what you're falling. Because it's nice to know what people in your life genuinely like to receive. Similarly, like, Angus, me touching him, because I like that for me, he's like, can you not?

He doesn't want his arm tick-up. He doesn't want to play footsies in the bed. So it's really about working out. And according to this survey in China, women, they've blanketed, prefer the acts of service to the words. Ah, so take with that what you will. Okay. So women before those kind of men.

It's got nothing to do with Jean-Claude Van Damme. No action heroes. Not action heroes? No action stars. Just unstacking the dishwasher. There you go. I mean, that is a lesson in life. Isn't it?

Shagai, can I get, I love you in Mandarin, please? I don't know it. Okay. I gave you like three minutes to work on that. I need to hear it. I have it at a Jersey. hear it. Just have a crack.

I can't understand the Chinese symbols. No, I don't want to be insulting. Can't do accents on the radio. His love language is don't set me up to be cancelled. Yeah. Okay. Trey love, turn in love. Jess and Ducko in the morning.

Jess and Ducko is 10K Alphabet on here. Yes, it is. You have 30 seconds. Answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. We have to take your first answer. You can't use the same answer twice. If you're answer to the question, say pass. We come back, of course, if there's time.

Stepping up today, we have Leighton. Good morning, Leighton. Good morning, how are you going? Good morning. We are fantastic, Leighton. The question is, what would you like to spend $10,000 on? I'm not going to pay the family on a holiday. Yeah, where are we going?

Oh, I've played the other side of the country, just to Perth, I'll say. Oh, well, you're not going to believe this, Leighton. You let us pee. It's pee for Perth. Well, there you go. Hopefully that's a good stuff. The stars are aligning for Leighton. Yeah, it's good.

Are you ready to rock, my friend? Oh, best as good as I'll ever be. Yeah, that's it. You're always ready, Leighton. Don't lie to us. Okay. All right. Let's do it.

If you say so, Duggo. When do you say it? Your time. We'll start after the first question. Leighton, let's do it. Starting with the letter P, we need you to name. A snack. A movie villain.

An offer's item Layton A soft drink A pepsy A sport A spice A spice A verb

A musical Your phone went from very normal And then you were getting very soft and soft I don't know if you're holding it further away. Yeah, I thought he was holding his breath and just not... He only just heard pineapple, and then I heard the second pass, and it did not hear the third, which is why we had the big paws. He didn't know what to do.

Yeah. Oh, well, sorry about that. Ah, it's all right. I don't think you were getting it anyway. We got ourselves too, Leighton. Let's go through him a movie veal and could have been the penguin, uh, or pinhead. What's pinhead from? I don't know.

I don't know. Bab's put it in there. An office item could have been a pen. Uh, a sport. Powerlifting, pole vaults, polo, a spice paprika. A verb play or. push. Look, Leighton, unfortunately we're not going to Perth, but you do get, you do get a custom phone case, or thanks to case of fire. All right. Thank you very much. Thank you, Leighton. Pinhead is the

villain in Hellraiser. I've just looked him up. Bro, I've never seen anything more terrifying. Oh, he is scary. He's literally got pins. I've seen that before. I didn't know it was called Pinhead. He's literally got pins in his head. Real horror. That's like a real horror sort of buff. I've got to delete that from my internet history. I never want that popping up. Anyway, thank you, Leighton. Well done, Leighton. We do play again. Eight o'clock, $10,000.

Up next. May I? Yeah, go. We don't tell each other everything that's going to come up on the show, but we give a little headline. Just have an idea. No headline here. Just says ducco.

Like, ducko talking. Yeah. What is that? Well, it's a ducko talking. It'd be me chatting a little bit. Um, we have a follow-up. We have a follow-up to something that happened at this time yesterday. Shut up about the pyramids.

Shut up. Are you on board with a conspiracy theory? No, God, no. Oh. We just have you got giant. We have a follow-up. We'll do it new. So this time yesterday, you came with one of the more bits of cooked content I've heard from you in a long while.

But maybe I'm wrong because we have been inundated with messages. For anyone who missed it, it'd be my pleasure to recap briefly, just briefly. How'd the pyramids get here? Yeah. Some friends and I discussing conspiracy theories, we cannot fathom human beings, even with the hordes of obviously slave labour. Back then, they are gigantic, but they also go so deep. And my friend, proffered what's being kept from us were their giants back then.

And I... Shy and I didn't know quite how to take us. We were like, what's this going to be? How are we going to do his theories? And then we've realized we're like, this is more on the vibe of No Dumb Thought Fridays. How do you? It was a genuine great Monday conversation that I thought was a safe place to bring it. It still is.

It turned out it wasn't. No. It was like a one mate call up. Good morning to Jesse. He's my new friend. We're starting a club. He was cooked. And a podcast.

And a podcast. Yeah, yeah. So that's what I mean. The support didn't come yesterday on the phones. However, it came on the Jess and Ducco Instagram, the Jess and Ducco Facebook, the Jessica, it came on the text line. And then all of a sudden now, you know what they're keeping from?

us, the history books. Giants. Are we just doing anything now? Jess's conspiracies. We've got Jay Farch's Conspiracy Corner. Is this a daily? Can I have this spot daily? Weekly.

Can I have fortnightly? Fortnightly. I love it. I love conspiracy theories. Hey, can I get my mate Jesse on? Which we also didn't know. Shogany said this yesterday and Babs. We didn't realize that about you.

And it's so funny. Because you talk a lot about, but we know a lot about you. Absolutely. And I'm an open book. I guess it's just. never come up for us. But then you also did tell us that your husband didn't know this about it. No, I actually don't think we've discussed it. So it makes me think that you're

nerdy about the conspiracy theories. No, I just genuinely I just don't know how they ever get brought up. It's not like I sit down and go, hey Ducko, have you read the latest on Roswell in Area 51? Like I don't... Usually conspiracy theorists do do that. Okay, well, maybe I'm not fully fledged. We caught up with someone in the office yesterday and he was, big time. See, he put me to shame, didn't he? See, maybe I'm an amateur.

You got your training wheels on I've got my training wheels and I'll be honest with you, Ducko, I don't know if I'm smart enough or analytical enough to really take it all in like someone will just tell me something and I go, there might be something to that,

there might be something in that. Following loose threads everywhere. I'm a big loose threader hence the giant thing why I got so excited to bring it to you because it's the first time I'd heard that one. Yes. But if we can carve out some time

I would love to tell you about my other ones. We had a bunch of people message in and strangely messaging me as well. And they've got theories that they wanted to... We just need to know if you are on board with these theories. Sure. So no one else on the Giants? Are we putting that one to bed?

Chagai Babs, do you guys see that one come through the interweb? Okay, so we'll put that one to bed. Just sleeping for now. Thank you. See, this is the support I need. Talk to me. Someone says a sleeping giant. Oh, yeah, there you go.

Chuck has messaged in. Chuck. The moon landing is fake. 100% it's fake. Sorry. The Americans just wanted to beat the Russians because the Russians were in that space race. And they were like, we can't have Russia taking that claim,

putting the Russian flag in the moon first. So they staged it. The Russians dropped out. That one I think has merit. That one I think has rights. How is their wind? How is their wind? Wind.

You know, have you seen the vision? Bro. The vision of the moon landing. Oh, sorry, I thought you meant in general. I thought we moved on conspiracy theories. Sticking with the moon? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's laughing.

I sort of, anything America like that, I can, you know. If I brought the moon landing first, you would. would have maybe warmed up to the Giants. I went too hard with Giants. What about this? Julie said, now this one I can also maybe JFK assassination. 100%.

It's all stage. It's all about power. It's all about control. Don't get me started on some of the other ones in the states, ducker. Okay, what about this one? Roger, we're getting into the weeds here. Pigeons are government spies.

Oh my God, I have heard this one, Roger. Yes, 100%. They're trained. You know, they are now. He trains them. The Russians do it. The pigeons. have had such a PR shift because they had to get the focus away from them.

So rats of the sky, that's just to get our focus away from them. Oh, they're pest, they're this, they're that, they defecate on statues. Nah, man, they're probably the smartest of the birds. What about this one from Bob? The modern influences are time travellers. Now, this is a relatively new one, Bob. This is new. Bob's up today with the Tickokkas. Remember me, mate, even yesterday bringing it back to the Giants.

My mate said Scotty Cam was a time traveller. And he had him been involved in the pyramids. Yeah, that's right. So I can't. You can't discredit it. I can't discredit it. Do you believe in the time travellers? I can't see how it hasn't happened yet.

Like some of the smartest minds have been working on some dumb stuff. Dumb things. So you're telling me they haven't also worked on some actually smart stuff too. Top secret. What about this one from Betty Lou? These are, yeah, Betty Lou. Global leaders are reptiles. I've just realised.

Oh, see, nah, the lizard people. The lizard people. The lizard people. Elon Musk. No, the lizard people. I draw the line at lizard people. That's what I believe that. I see, I'm more into lizard people than the giants.

You're more into lizard people than giants. Have you seen Elon? He's not real. What at this one? Last one. Yeah, what's this person's name? Angus. Oh, yep.

5G isn't real. It's just my big head. No, see, if he said it was him and his daughter's head, that's 5G. I didn't know where the line was. Forging, I appreciate you having some control. Jess and Ducko. Just and Ducko. Quick relationship quiz, Ducko.

A few of these opportunities have come up. Found myself in a scenario this morning. I want to see if you can get inside my head which avenue I took. You know, I've been jimming before the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we're still doing that? Still doing it. First time today, though, forgot to pack a towel.

And you know, I'm trying to be more conscientious. being a human being in this air-locked room, particularly for you and shy guy, got to have a rins. Yeah. You still, yeah, I was showering. So you didn't have the towel to shower. Didn't have a towel.

Okay. What did I do? Ooh. A. Yes. Just not shower. Well, that's pie. B.

Dry off using the paper towels. C. Use the T-shirt I had just been wearing that was kind of stinky and sweaty. Mm. Or D. Shake off like. like a dog and air dry. Well, you do have short showers.

So the shakeoff could happen, but I'm going to say you use your T-shirt. He knows me. Yeah, yeah. I would do that. I think that's the way I'd go. Okay, because I tossed up paper towel and I went, well, that's obviously a drying device.

Yeah. But it felt so wasteful. But also, I don't think it would go far. You'd need like 40 of those just to dry. You absolutely would, and you know us. We try and be friend to Mar Nature. T-shirt, I mean, unless you were doing hectic cardio, it's okay.

Just, you know. Thank you. Because I felt a little bit of a sweat on. It's not ideal. We're not saying that. Did a full nine minutes on the treadmill. I'd gotten a bit sweaty. What level are you going on the tready?

9.4. Is fast walk or are we jogging? Now, jogging. Okay. And I get really conscientious because I've obviously got my headphones in, blasting a bit of Demi Lovato. Hell yeah. And I take them off at one point and I just don't realize how much I'm stomping.

Oh, how loud you are. I don't think I have very good running technique. No one's taught me how to run. So I just feel really heavy and clunky. And then you catch yourself. panting and sweating and stomping. You go, this is quite the sight to behold. Do you reckon you're like fast breathing when you're listening to it?

Absolutely. Because whilst I can pick up a dumbbell, running, I find very challenging. But I'm trying to push myself. You are. You're trying to get your running. So I got my sweat on. So, yeah, using the t-shirt and I had a big graphic on it. It's my peers' brothers' t-shirt.

So it was really quite yucky rubbing on my skin. I actually pulled you yesterday. Oh, my God. Talked. Oh, that could mean a lot of things. So me and Morgan were walking the dog and the child And then I saw a girl running And then ran past us

And Morgan's like, ugh It just looks horrible And I was like, well, you know Jess is running now? Because she knows that you're a water creature, not a runner. Absolutely. But it was like, you being like a duck who would do a fungus. Absolutely. Doesn't go down well, does it?

It doesn't. It doesn't. Did you do? Ristel walk was ruined. You did it on instinct. You didn't try and heard it. I was like, oh, Jess is running now. Like you could be a runner.

See, every time I do it to Angus, it just slips out. It's bad that we're going to rain that shit in. Jess and Ducko. Chagot, I block your pants. Bad, stop crying. I need energy. Just stop eating on camera. Rolling camera.

Rolling lights. Rolling audio. Ducco's acting class. And action. Becoming a staple of the show, you know, a fan favorite. I think we're all better for it. I think so. People just enjoy hearing you three act.

shy guy, if I'm being honest, you know, because... You're getting him out of his comfort zone, Ducker. You're making him read, you're making him write, all things that he's really good at. It's his least favorite time of the Fortnite. I thought you were giving him the scripts 24 hours in advance. I was, but he still wasn't reading him, so I was like, oh, stuff it. You just get it, whatever else gets him. That's extracurricular activity.

You just want to do that, yeah. Okay, you're just trying to help out your dyslexic brother, but... Yeah, it was. Yeah, we got to stick together, left-handed dyslexies. Uh, so, today's movie is from the iconic. John in 60 seconds. Which we all agree. Top three, Cage.

Great Cage. It is such a good film. Came up naturally on the show. You actually watched it. Yep, that was my suggestion. On Apple, did you say, Apple? I can't remember where I watched it. But yeah, it was good.

It was great. It ticked all the boxes. It's so stupid. So excited to revisit it. So this scene is the iconic scene where, for those that don't know the film, Nicholas Cage's younger brother's got on some trouble. They need to steal 51 cars in like 24 hours. He's got a crew together.

It's his old friends and some young guys, too. And this is him talking about how to do it and what to do. You guys are the crew. I've combined a few roles for you there, Babs. I think Shago will play the role of Memphis, Nicholas Cage. I don't know how we could compete with that audition. Well, it was strong. Of Cage's most famous lines.

So I'm happy. I'm not even going to argue that, director. He has earned the role. So we'll play that. And at the end, I've got a car-stabing sound effect, Shagga. When it doesn't start, that's when you can say you're very last line, okay? You've got to bring it home with that line. Because Eleanor is Nicholas Cage's unicorn.

It's his car that he cannot seem to steal, you know? Yep. Sure. Okay. You feeling good over there, guys? Let's do Cage proud, shy guy. This is like the greatest actor of all time. Okay.

We're ready, people? Okay. Babbs, chew your toast. All right. Cue lights, cue audio. Okay, 50 cars, one night. We pull this off. Kip walks.

We screw it up. He's done. You all in? Like I got a choice. Let's do it clean, kid. As long as I get my cut, I'm good. Man, you had me at cars. Just don't let the cops ruin my night. Yo, we're going to shine, baby. No mistakes. We move fast. We move smart. Let's ride. Oh, no, Eleanor. Don't do that to me. Hey, cut, cat. Hey, you know what? Not bad, team. Not bad.

I really liked what you two ladies were doing with your accent choices. Thank you. Strong choices. Thank you very much. And what I loved is that Memphis show, I guess character that all of a sudden got your accent towards the end of the scene. He got quite gruff. I did.

Okay, let's raise the stakes. I want to see those accents again. I like that Southern in what you guys were doing. Babs, you were a bit criminally, a bit gruff. Yeah, oh, Babs had a pass. That was great. Yeah, you had a past. Shagga, this time, I want you to do this scene, right?

Like you are walking the plane called a pirate ship and you're, just petrified you're about to go in. Your little brother, did you not... We pull this off, keep walks, we screw it up. He's done. That means he's dead. He's dead. Yeah, yeah. This is it. This is high stakes, man. Okay. Am I still Memphis? Yeah, we're going to keep us here. I think we're going to keep us this.

To put in layman's terms, your robo vac is about to accidentally be killed. I don't have anything more. And you've got to save your robo back. Okay. All right. Okay. Rolling sound on audio. Okay. And remember shy guys, more. Action. Okay, 50 cars, one night.

We pull this off, Kip walks. We screw it up, he's done. You all in? Like I got a choice. Let's do it clean, kid. As long as I get my cut, I'm good. Man, you had me at cars. Just don't let the cops ruin my night.

Yo, we're going to shine, baby. No mistakes. We move fast. We move smart. Let's ride. I don't want to feel this one. Oh, no, Eleanor. Don't do this to me.

Well done, hey! Wow. I mean, he took it from point A. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To point A. Jess and Ducco. Jess and Ducco. Hey, it's Babs, and this is my blog.

Commence Operation Superstar Bratsley. The best supporting actress herself. Babs, here I am. You put on an Oscar performance before. Thank you, thank you. I'm actually a good actress, you know. Another one of my hats Fish cleaning

And actress Well fish killing Fishing down drained And then Supporting actors How are our fish A side note Yeah good

Okay I fed them this morning They look good Yeah They're all safe I saw shy guy cleaning the tank With that little magnetic Squaboxy

It's oddly satisfying It is quite nice It is Okay What do you got for us today Well you guys know I'm a little bit dramatic Sometimes

Oh yeah I mean No Like, say the other line. If you say so, but you're sitting next to me. Okay. So it's true. In comparison, it doesn't feel.

Well, I think sometimes it's fun to add a little bit of GST on to things. You know, it keeps things interesting. Bit of mayo. Yeah, good. Anyway, I had to check myself a few times over the last week because there's something wrong with me. So you guys know that I went and stayed at my parents' place for the weekend. You wanted to wake up so you could give Dameau breakfast in bed. Yes.

Well, yes. But another reason why I did that is because, one of my housemates is sick at the moment. Like, she's quite ill. Yeah, like a flu-y kind of vibe. Like a fluy sick. And it freaked me out that much that I had to leave the house for the weekend.

Oh, you had to quarantine yourself. Because every time she coughed, I would get irrationally angry. Wow. Now, you are on the record as saying any bodily fluid in particular. Yes. But it's basically... Sneezers, you don't like things.

And hiccups as well. Yeah. But when she would cough, it would make me really angry and I don't know why. Was she not covering her mouth or anything? No, just the sound of it would just like... Did you say it to point you said something to her? No, I didn't. I just left.

She's anti-confrontational. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm out of here. She's coughing. She's doing it again. I didn't think you were quite the germpho. But is it just any bodily function? You're like, I can't be around me. Well, that's what I'm kind of get to. I think as I'm getting older, I'm becoming more germ.

And I don't know if it's because I live in a share house. And now I'm like, oh, you know, it spreads quite easy. Yeah. You in that house, you're the mother who's like, I've cooked dinner, I've done the laundry, I've done everything, and no one appreciates me. I've not had a thank you. Not how to thank you.

No one's unstacked the dishwasher? You're an old soul. I think I am, but honestly, I don't know. I sat back and was like, okay, that's a bit, that's a bit silly. Wow, so it had nothing to do with Father's Day. You just wanted to get away from your sick house. Yeah, and they're like, where are you? I'm just like, I'm stinging with my parents this weekend.

Did you, did you do it really bitchy, though? Where you're like, obviously there's a problem, and they knew that there was a problem, She didn't tell them. It's fine. They know me well enough that they kind of came to the conclusion. They're like, oh, like, she's gone because we're sick at the moment. Now, here's the question.

When you're ill, do you chuff off to protect them too? I usually stay in my room. So you're happy to infect the rest of the house, but they're not allowed to. No, no, no. Like, I'm very conscious. Like, I, like, will spray Glen 20, like, wash my hands. Like, I stay in my room, stay in bed, whatever. But, yeah, I don't know.

for some reason. Well, we've been sick in here. Like, Jess or me or shy I've been sick here, and you haven't or whatever. You haven't been that bad around us. Oh, maybe internally, but like, yeah, like, it freaks me out. Actually, remember there was a time when I was having to blow my nose heats. This is probably before a whole. Maybe you just got back from the holidays.

I was sick. And Babs did look at me a bit like, oh, then like left the room. There you go. She's not saying anything because she's sweet and lovely. Yeah. But what she is doing is internally. Babs is actually raging. She's not sweet and lovely.

We thought she was, you know. I think she's a bit more Karen than we give her credit for. Yeah. Well, apparently. Interesting. And so you've always been like this, but it's getting worse as you're getting old. It's getting worse as I'm getting older, and it's really weird. And you're only 24.

Yeah, like, even sniffling really gets me too. Like, if someone needs to blow their nose, like, I'm like two seconds away from being like, just go and blow your nose, please. How do you feel about people chewing food? Oh, yeah, okay. Me and Jethro have to listen to music when we eat because it freaks me out. Yeah. To drown each other's mouth noises out.

Really? Yeah, and now he doesn't even have to ask. He just, when we sit down to eat dinner, he turns music on so that I don't have to, get freaked out by the sound of people chewing. Do you chat as well? Yeah, we chat as well, but it's just like in the background. That's interesting. You just hate all those sounds.

Yeah, I do. What's he doing for you? Well, that's... Shy guy, get in on this. Disgust is yesterday. Yeah, well, you told me I was allowed to say it. Has anyone noticed the noises Jess makes when she eats her... Everyone notices the noise I make.

Eat her apple in the morning. When you're in your morning, apple. Oh. What? It was a bad. Anyway, the last thing, couple weeks. They're crunchy, the bravos are crunchy. But then it's the talking with the eating.

Was this whole blog just a message for me? This is bad just letting us and know what a noise out. If you do it on air, it's a safe thing, you know what I mean? Jess and Ducko. So this time yesterday I told you about the car that it parked over my driveway since Thursday night and was there until Monday afternoon, yesterday afternoon. You'd been door knocking. You'd letter dropped the neighbourhood.

Whose vehicle is this? Thinking on the last half an hour to an hour, We put a note under their windshield. That didn't work. That didn't work. No, snapped off the windscrimed wipers. That didn't work. You bought spray paint.

I assumed to tag the car. Duck or war's ear. It was to draw, don't park here again. Don't you do this. It was to draw lines on your roads. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it hasn't been an issue for a while, but I've had drive-way issues in the past. Sort of old neighbors.

It's a bug bear, of course. It's a bug bear. You don't want that to happen. We had then people coming down the road, the street being like, oh, what are you going to do with that car? What's happening? Like, Kathy Kim, Kim, across the road. were asking, they were asking their fellow neighbours, no one knew whose car it was.

You're trying to call the Guinness World Record people being like, you're saying one of those blokes who can pull the cars with their rope and their teeth? We wanted that. I need him. I wish I was friends with someone who had a tow truck. I was really wishing I was. That'd be fun. Would a toe bar work and you put a piece of string or a rope or something?

You just said. Not string, like strong string. Strong string. Strong string to work. Because Angus's car has a tow bar. Strong string it would work. I've got a tow bar too on my. Oh, you've got a toe bar.

Yeah, yeah, mate, I've got a forward baby. Do you need it? I don't think the Mazda would have had one. No, I don't know how I got the Mazda. No. Yeah, right, exactly. Oh, yeah, we don't want that. So I couldn't do any of that.

Ask the neighbours, the sharehouse on both sides. They said, not ours. They then asked the next sharehouse next door. Not theirs either. So we went, okay, this is no one's car. We're now going to take it to the council. Council came, got a fine. We're like, geez, that happened fast.

Yesterday. Paul is right in the carmic universe. Yes. A person's been punished. Then we found out that it was actually our neighbour. It was two doors down. It was a new person who moved here. She'd parked the car there.

She's from Cairns and she'd gone home to Cairns for the weekend. And the issue is their house, inactive driveway, and they park over it. Yep. So she's wrongly assumed, oh, this whole street must do that. I'll just do this here. I'm going to park over this guy's driveway as well. They mustn't use theirs either. Even though supposedly she'd been there for a week and seen that we park in the driveway.

Anyway, her, the mother, the matriarch of the household. She was very nice. She's the one who said, it's my housemate. I'll get her to apologize. Yada yada. I said, no worries, whatever. We know now. Yesterday she came, moved the car.

I didn't see that. We, Morgan and I come out to go for an afternoon walk and we're like, fantastic. The car's gone. Beautiful. We come out, the matriarch of the house runs out and she's like, oh, oh, she's been sitting at the window. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, okay, you're here.

I told her she's going to come out and apologize to you guys because that is not on. And I was like, oh. How old do you reckon these people? Early 20s. That's amazing confrontation. And I was like, oh, really? And she's like, I told her. And I go, oh, look, as I said to you, we wouldn't have given her the fine.

How do we know it was you? And she goes, no, no, she deserves the fine. This is unbelievable. I would have moved to avoid this confrontation. Then the neighbour comes out, like, she liked the chick who's car it was, and she was so sheepish. Caught tail between the legs. Yeah, yeah, she comes out to me.

And then the other houseman's watching from the driveway, like everyone was watching, everyone's watching. Morgan, can I just add, stayed in the car, didn't come out for this one. So brave behind closed doors, honey. Happy to write a note, little Morgan. Oh, yeah. So it's just me. The duckman just rolls out to them.

And she's like, I'm so sorry. I didn't know it was a driveway. I shouldn't have done it, rah-rah, rah, and can I just say, it goes a long way in today's age apologising and owning it. Because instantly, I was like, you made a mistake, it happens, it's all good.

Can't take that $300 fine back, sweetheart, but... Well, I did say to her, I wouldn't have given you the fine had everyone said no one knew whose car it was. And she goes, no, no, that's fair enough. I deserve it. I cannot believe how well this has gone. And I was like, look, I don't know you want to do it again.

I just want to stress, we're not those kinds of people to call a council, but when we thought it was a random car, blood in the water. And she's like, no, it's fine. I was like, I hope you enjoyed you a trip up north. She's gotten a lot more expensive. She apologised. That's actually amazing.

Yeah, and then they're like, thanks so much and whatever. And then I walked by being like, oh, it's not awkward now. Like it's now... Oh, see, that's the best part of it. Yeah. The negativity, the ripple effect, the or having to avoid if you see them arriving at the same time as you. And it's fine.

Yeah, it's good. The power of the big stick, don't you think that's fantastic. It went a long way. Yes and daco. Jess and Ducco. Just quickly, Ducco. I had the biggest parenting win of my 23-month journey so far. There's been highs, there's been lows, there's been wins, there's been losses.

But what happened yesterday takes the cake. Here we go. Had a big day of solo parenting. My husband was working a wedding, so he was out. He was out all day. It's fine. But the apartment we're living in while we're renovating our house, unfortunately, is not equipped with blackout blinds. So getting her down for the midday nap

So I can have two hours apiece Hasn't happen in recent times And you know some days You just need a minute You just need a minute Or you got a five month old Whether you've got a kid or not Sometimes you just need a freaking minute

Yeah yeah yeah quiet You just need some quiet Just need some brain rot scroll time Whatever it might be Maybe you need to chop a frickin onion And if she doesn't sleep Well there goes any of that time Hey

For the first time in 23 months And I'll say maybe a year where the vocab has started a bit, she's been able to ask for things where screens may have been a little helpful and she has up until this point not really engaged with them. Yesterday for the first time,

Ducco, she asked for Bowie, which I was able to work out meant Bluey. Which gave me like half an hour, baby. She has... Booie. She's not sat down and watched anything. How good's that?

Because, yeah, you said she doesn't really like doing that. She doesn't like watching things. Which is probably a good thing. It is absolutely. And I don't want it to become a third parent and all that. I've read the research. I get it, he's warping our children's brains. Yeah.

But if she ain't going to sleep, I need a minute. Yes. And she actually asked for booey. How good's buoy? I don't even know where she learned booey because I've tried to put it on before and she's walked off. Yeah, I was going to say, you haven't talked about showing her booing I've tried.

I've tried. Yeah. And she's walked off. I've got friends who have two, three-year-olds, and their birthday parties are booey themed. I'm like, my kid doesn't know booey. She's not engaging with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Maybe it's the daycare. I don't know. She asked for it and she sat through. And watched the whole thing? Mate, they're like seven or eight-minute episodes. And they're great too. Good for you to watch. Good learning.

They actually are. I ended up getting out of the kitchen and going, this is quite impactful, isn't it? I can't, I want to get a voice of a gig on Blui. Oh, my God. That is for the honour to be a part of it and lucidate. But anyway, it was just the best parenting win on my journey so far because I went, we now have booey in our arsenal.

Yeah, we can buoy it. Firstly, we'll work on Baluy. Yeah, yeah. Were you thinking like, because when she said buoy, it's like how you say boy, like in the ocean thing? So I was like, well, she wants like a, she wants like a... It was a nice day. I thought, did you want to go swimming in? Yeah, nautical.

And she's pointing at the TV. Booy? Booy. It's the cutest thing ever. But it's so powerful. Brilliant. It's such a tool. I'll only use it as that.

And now make sure you just keep it with blueie dipper and so don't be like, all right, now we can watch Encanto. Now we can watch another one, which one she said today, Charlotte. Oh, she listed about 12. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I tried to get it to watch. You're not going to, Saturday night. I put on the Jimmy Neutron movie because I like Jimmy Neutron.

Because you think your husband looks like Jimmy Neutron. The hair, man. But it's Daddy. She was not into Jimmy Neutron, which was such a bummer. The animation on that's really poor. Yeah, booey is better. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alpha Bucks on hit.

30 seconds to answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. Have to take your first answer. You cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, you can say pass. Of course, we come back if there is time. Stepping up today for the $10,000. We have Christine. Hello, Christine.

Hi, good morning. Good morning. Christine, what are you going to do with $10,000 when you win in about 30 seconds time? Probably a new car. Ooh, got your eye on anything specific? Not really because I haven't had a good think about it because I didn't think it was in the near future. It was feasible.

Yeah, Chuck 10K, to the mix, anything's possible. Maybe you'd like to look at a Hyundai. Maybe you'd like to look at a Honda. Because they start with Haynes. Okay, cool. That's what you're going to work with today. No, no. All right. You like that?

Come on. Yeah. All right. Your time will start after the first question. Christine, you're ready to rock? Yeah, let's go. Let's go. Let's do it.

Starting with letter H, we need you to name. A sport. Pocket. A Harry Potter character. Hermione. A flower. Um, her high danger. An animated movie.

Um, Hulk. A five-letter word. Harry. A food. Hamburger. A drink? Um... A school subject.

History. A Marvel actor. Um... Gosh, it was good. Yeah, we got ourselves. We got ourselves seven, maybe six. Animated movie Hulk. I know there's obviously been real.

I don't know if it's been an animated film, though. And the issue. The Hulk. Is it the Hulk? It would be a tough one if we were playing for 10K there. Happy Feet or How to Train Your Dragons, what we could have had. A drink, hot chocolate or honey tea. Oh, love a honey tea.

A Marvel actor could have been Harry Stiles, Henry Cavill, Hugh Jopkin. There is a few. Look, Christine, you're a great player. Everything else you answered, you got correct. You don't quite get the $10,000, unfortunately. But you do get a custom phone case. All thanks to case to fire. They're fantastic.

Thank you. Thank you, Christine. You can hold your head up high. Fantastic work. Thank you. Have a good morning. You too. We do play again tomorrow, 6.30 and 8 o'clock, as we do every day. The only show to give you potentially $20,000 in one day.

Right, the only show doing a co-fod as well. Oh, you call up. You're on top of the 20 grand. Enjoy the money. Every night o'clock, we're sending someone for a boogie night stay at the QT, Newcastle with some spending money. Every single day we're doing that. This is unbelievable generosity. You need to get involved, though, on the airwaves.

Yeah, have a chance. Next. No, the chance of the show next. Lucky we've carved it. out some time. Otherwise, I don't know how we would have given this away. Shigai and me going again. You know, a little boy's trip. Hey.

Hell of a big story, Shagga. You've heard how good that bath is? Hell yeah. Bring a bath bomb? Yeah. Beautiful. Oh, yeah. You bring the bath bomb again, big guy?

I'll bring the bath. And you bring the Lufa? Always. He'll do your back. You do his. Always. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Up next, though, we're asking, I'm 13, 1060.

What would you tell your 20-year-old self? This feels deep for us. Well, doesn't it? It does feel deep. But you can take it any which way you want. Oh, totally. We'll give you some examples. Let's get a service level.

Yes. Yes. Let's get philosophical. We don't do it often. No. But when we do, packs a punch. We cook.

I mean, they call a fame prize up for grabs. You can say the QT Hotel Pust Cash Roller. 13, 1060. What would you tell your 20-year-old self? I'll take 30-year-olds telling their 29-year-old self if you must. You know? Absolutely. You get five minutes.

Yep. With your 20-year-old self. Yeah. How you're setting them up better. This has been a list that's going around online. These are always great fun. Some of these I really concur with and believe with. First one.

Injuries. It's cumulative. Yes, it is. Just get your shoulder once? Twice. Three times. That's going to hurt you forever. And these are hard, aren't they, Ducco?

I know you've only shared one. But can you imagine trying to tell your 20-year-old self? Hey, look after yourself. Do your rehab. Do your rehab. Oh, boy. 20-year-old Ducko would punch you in the face and go, I've got life to live. Can't be bothered.

But now, even 34-year-old ducko. Can we rotate a cup's week? He's suffering the consequences. Protect your hearing. Wear earplugs, so live music events. Massive. I'd even expand that out. Be contrientious of your headphones.

You know, we grew up in the iPod era. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No one's talking to each other on the school bus. We've just got our headphones in. Blaring. Blaring. Listening to Kylie Minogue. Obviously.

I don't think you can fix hearing. You can't. You can't. That's the problem with it. Your body will remember what you did. I'm a doctor, and it comes up a lot. You can't cheat your body. You can't cheat your body. What about this one? This one's a my personal one. You can never pack too many pairs of underpants on holidays.

You just can't. I'm still learning that lesson. Always keep packing them. And it's one of those things as well. They don't take up that much space. No. Do yourself a favour. Do you want to say?

Stayed down south, actually, for mine. Yeah, go for it. I could have five minutes with 20-year-old Jess. Yeah, yeah. Just have a second think about getting laser. Because trends with body hair. Oh, yeah? They're cyclical.

They're as cyclical as fashion. The bunny is coming back. I've gone laser from my eyelashes down. Everything's gone. Everything's gone. And now all I see, TikTok, fashion blogs, hair's in. Hair's in. Hair down there's in.

I don't have that luxury You can't do that anymore You can't do it anymore You hope the laser fails If anything if it comes back I remember seeing an article I don't want to misquote Angelina I feel like it was Angelina

Could have been She had done laser And then for a movie role Needed to be a hairy natural woman They had to glue Hair on her Hair on Oh so there's ways

There's ways But I'm saying I don't say do or don't do it Just think twice Think twice Because bald was in for a bit I suppose it's like tattoos as well Think twice before you ink yourself when you're 18.

I would argue think twice at least about getting a partner's name. Oh, definitely. That's what I would really say. Or at least have a conversation with your tattoo artist. How easy will this be to change into, I don't know, my favourite chip? Or a different pattern. A symbol or something like that. Yeah.

Leave it twice. And don't put it on my neck or face. Oh, goodness gracious. No. Whoever you pick as your bridal party, For your wedding. It won't necessarily be there in five years. Or who you invites your wedding doesn't fully matter.

Couldn't agree more. You know? At risk of getting the entire New South Wales education system offside. Here we go. Oh, but I guess we're talking to our 20-year-old selves. Yeah. Oh, here we go. Just don't jump into a career, a line of study.

Too fast. Live your life. Yeah, I can agree. We make 15-year-olds decide subjects that are going to impact what they do in higher education, which will then impact their career. They're 15-16. Yeah. What the hell do they know?

Even at 20, you might be thinking about uni or TAFE. You don't know what's up. Also, like, you're over-a-school you get at the end of school. It matters a little bit. There are ways to your path. Yeah. You know? Like a road closure.

There's going to be a detour. You'll still get to your destination. Yeah. That's it. One for me. Floss. Just floss. God, I just...

Babs is only 24. If I could get her future self to come back now. Oh, God. That's one for her, too. The chalkiness. You're taking all these down, Babs? I am. I have started flossing like every night, too.

See? And you stopped eating brown rice upon my request? Yep, got health. Actually, do we change this? Got health is key. Are you older? Yeah. And what do you want to tell Babs?

Yeah. We'll get Babs in here, 13, 1060. Of your own personal experience, obviously. Help Babs. Let's get it. a list for Babs and other youngies, but mainly Babs. She's the vocal point.

You're rethinking that neck tattoo Babs? Of course. You rethinking laser Babs? No. It's too late there. She's six appointments deep. 131060. What do you want to tell Babs?

That's right. The youth. Give us a call. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. 131060. What would your oldest self tell your younger self, aka what do you want to

tell Babs. That's right. She's 24. She's still got so much life ahead of her, darker. Us seasoned people. I was like chickens? No, it's like veterans. Veterans, thank you. There's a lot of wisdom. We can...

We're young in the scheme of things, you know? Yeah, but we've lived some life. I'd like to hear like a 90-year-old come on and just say... And there's a thread going around online. It was 40-year-olds telling their 20-year-old selves, things. Obviously mistakes that they'd made. sunscreen, ducco.

No 20-year-old takes sunscreen seriously. Yep. I'm here to tell you. If nothing for the, obviously, melanoma and that sort of skin safety, wrinkles, man. What a shogger always said. Nothing healthy about a tan. That's why he loves the pale life.

He's embraced it. So is barbs, actually, to be fair. Yeah, I know. Have you seen it? Today? I told you what I'm doing. Spring is just that weird period where you're a bit pasty and you just got to expose yourself a bit.

You do, but sunscreen it up. Babs. We go to Sophie on 131060. Good morning, Sophie. Hi, Fran. Sophie, how old are you? I just turned 30. All right.

You've lived some life, Sof. There's a bit in there. Yep. Yep. What do you want to turn around and tell maybe your younger self, i.e. Babs. Fiber is just as important as protein. Start eating beans, guys.

Start eating beans. Eat your beans. And legumes. Yeah. And legumes. Sophie, don't you think. think it is such a psychology, marketing, PR, whatever it is, we don't know enough about our guts.

Oh, yeah. And we think, oh, God, sugar is the enemy. Fats are the enemy. It's like, no, no, they're a healthy fats. They're a polysaturated. There are things that we just blanket. God health is just so, so important. And if you can get it right, it's so much easier to prevent it than it is to fix it.

Just eat your beans, guys. Eat more beans, Sophie. I like it. I love that. Tony, good morning. How are you guys? Fantastic. How's your morning walk?

Oh, no, I'm driving in a bad area, actually. Oh, okay, well, we won't keep you then? Yeah, yeah. What do you want to tell your younger self? My Bitcoin. Oh. Okay. Don't forget the password.

Oh, okay. Has this happened to you, Tony? No, but it's happened to poop. It's happened. And once you forget that password, you know, Tom's a 117, 1, 2, 3. Yeah. Nothing's gone. Absolutely.

You can't reset. Here's my security questions. It's gone. Your Bitcoin going all right, Tony? Oh, yeah, it's going great. Yeah, there you go, Babs. Getting to the Bitcoin. Ellie, good morning.

Good morning. How are you? Excellent, babe. What do you wish you could go back and tell your younger self that maybe Babs can take on board? Stick to puppies and don't have kids. How many skin babies do you have, Ellie? I have two children.

Two children. You regret both of them? It's just one. One always seems to be like the first one's great. And the second one comes, everyone goes, ugh. The first one. And then you forget, you go, we'll breathe again.

You should have done it. So people have four kids. Shame on you. Shame on you. Terrible memories. Take notes, Babs. Jody, on 13, 10, 60, Jody. What's your message to Babs?

My message was to my 20-year-old self. when house prices were $100,000 get more investments and the same house is now $800,000. Oh, at least. And, you know? Inflation, baby. Now you're coming.

Babbs is never going to be able to get a house. No, the Australian dream has changed. The Australian dream is renting forever. The white picket fence has changed, that dream? Jody, that's a great one. But it's hard in retrospect, because at the time, that seems just as unachievable.

But you look back and you think, oh, Jesus, I should have jumped at that. We go to Glenn, good friend of the show. Good morning, Glenn. Good morning, Legends. How you doing? Great, Glenn. I don't know if we have time for the amount of wisdom you could impart.

But give us your top one. What do you wish you could go back? Tell your 20-year-old self, maybe Babs can run with it. Be prepared to waste so much of your adult life trying to work out what to have for dinner. Yes. There's no advice there. That's just going to happen. Yeah, it's just acceptance.

You can't get around that no matter what happens. And the side note is that when your wife says, she doesn't care what you have, she's going to say no to the first thing you recommend. Yeah, that is going to happen. I saw a great hack the other day, Glenn. Maybe you can use it. Go on, the wisdom from me to you.

You ask your wife, what do you think we're having for dinner? Guess what I'm cooking? Oh, yeah, there you go. You haven't got anything prepared. But she goes, oh, I hope it's chicken cacciatore. You're going to love it, honey. Guess what happens not? And then she inadvertently reveals it.

You quickly go buy all the things for chicken catch to her. And then you know what? You buy it chicken cachatore and come home and she goes, I don't even want you. I chase my mask. Jess and Ducco. Morgan and I, we got a bottle of wine that's really expensive. That was really nice to open for when we could finish it fully together.

When she could drink again, we're now moving off breastfeeding complete. So she's now, flows like formula bottles. So you've had this bottle waiting in the wings? Waiting there since before she was born. Wow, special. It's an expensive bottle of wine, which we don't normally do. Like, this thing's pretty exy. You're happy with Goon.

Yeah. Usually. Goon of Fortune, baby. But this one is pretty expensive. However, annoyingly, it was 12 years age. And apparently the sweet spot's 10 years. So it was like not as good as it could have been. And knowing that, it's like you've passed it now?

You can't go back in time. We'll put it back in the cupboard for another two. Anyway, it was still delicious. It's cork, obviously. Oh, yeah. Fancy. On our Monday? No, to be fair, this was the weekend.

There's a bit left over. You're a bogey boy. On Monday night, I wouldn't be as firing today if I'd had a bottle of wine last night. So we'd had a fire, Flood had gone to bed because now she can go to. a bed and settling in a cot and whatever. So, like, there's a bit of freedom back. And it was this nice moment of reflecting on the journey that is parenthood thus far. Okay.

And we're talking about what we're loving about it, what you don't like about it. And then we're talking about it. And then individually, right? From your own perspective. Yeah, yeah. And together, well, we're working well as a team. And we're sort of just, you know, we're just blowing smoke up each other's ass. Like, yeah, let's go, man.

Come on. This is beautiful. We deserve this. I love it. It was a great, honestly, it was a really nice moment to just sit back and go, hell yeah, we're doing it. She's not dead yet. We're surviving.

Absolutely. And then it quickly turned to, what do you think we can each work on individually? Be honest with me? Who took it into that territory? I think I did. But then I said, because I know I can be better at screen time. I know when she gets all I'll need to put my phone down more. We do a lot of work on our phone, present on there, yada yada.

I need to get better on that. I know that. And Morgan's like, yeah, you do. You do need to get better on that. So you got in first. I know mine. Yeah, yeah. No, I said, I'm pretty sure mine screen time.

She said, yeah, I think that's yours too. And then we talked about it for a while. Strategies used to get better at it. Great. And I said, what do you reckon yours is? And she goes, I don't, I can't think of anything that I need to. Okay, now we're getting into choppy water and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I went, okay. She goes, I'm not being, honestly, do you have anything? I actually would like to know something. Yeah, I know. Oh, I know. And I went, I'll hear the basic. And I went, you are a bit. of a germaphobe, and I didn't realize how much of a germaphobe you were until we had

a child. I think you just, you can loosen up a little bit on the, on the cleanliness and the joke, like it's going to happen, whatever. Because you're looking ahead to when the kid is mobile, literally sucking on everything, putting everything in their mouth. Literally yesterday, Lichia was licking a pole down by the beach. Exactly. Licking a pole. Exactly.

You're going to have to. It's going to happen. You're going to have to lighten up in that. That's a fair one. And she's a nurse, right? so she's germaphobe and whatever. She's like, no, no, I'm normal. All the other people are not normal because of her cleanliness.

And I was like, okay, all right. Okay, so that one may be to land quite where you go. But I can't, you know, think of anything. What about not sweating the small stuff? Like if Flo's been in the car seat for longer than the recommended, whatever it is, hour and a half, or hasn't had enough tummy time that day, or the room isn't perfect temperature. Like, it is what it is.

Like, it's okay. And she goes, no, no, but I'm doing that. Okay. I think it's a lot about getting louder for you, Ducker. Oh, you continue. Look for one. We went quiet. And I went, why don't your feedback can be working and taking feedback?

And then she laughed. And she's like, yeah, okay. She's a proud woman. She's doing great work, obviously. And she is. And you're the only one at fault. Jeff and Ducco. Welcome to a brand new Tuesday.

I was sort of just about done now anyway. Absolutely. If you're just joining us, you're going to have to catch the podcast. See you later. It's a hell of a shot. Fantastic show. But it's done there. It's done.

But we do need to award the co-fob. We have this every single day. You're not to stay at the QT, beautiful QT, Newcastle. Plus, we give you 100 rolls cash. QT, immerse yourself in otherworldly luxury where new age possibility delight. That room service menu also delights. Oh, yeah.

Our winner today, Sophie, getting involved earlier in the show when we asked, what would you go back and tell your 20-year-old self? Yeah. Which, by extension, Babs, can take on board. She being the youngest of the team. at a ripe old age of 24. And she did take notes, bad. She did.

This was a big one from Sophie. Fiber. Oh, no, you've got Sophie. Are you playing Sophie? No, no, no. Oh, sorry, you were getting Sophie. You say it, you say it. Fiber, just as important as protein.

Fiber hasn't got a good enough PR or marketing crew. Yeah. But they've got Sophie. Beans, legumes. It's important for your gut health. Beans, beans, beans, the musical fruit. The more you eat, the more you tooth. Is that what you're doing?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was just going to compliment it. That great gear. You're going to bring that in. Great. Great. break in. Yeah, eat your beans, Babs.

That's top of the pile. Yeah, Babs' beans. Oh, you can't say, you're a bean company. Do you know what I've got in my top drawer at my desk? What? A can of baked beans. Rolled out the other day when I was looking for some scissors. Don't you dare whip that out at work, please God.

Babbs are so good. Oh, of course you'd froth baked beans. I can't do them. I can't do them. Yeah, with a bit of butter. Oh, they actually aren't nice. I just don't ever buy them. I just don't buy them.

You want the one and you can have the tin in mine? I've already commissioned it to Babs. Actually, yeah, give it to Babs. Okay. Well, we'll see how many time she let some rip tomorrow morning. Love it. And it's a biggie, too. Not those little crappy minis you buy in the fore-past.

Why is that in you? It's only where I work long enough where you need to break up in your emergency can of beans. I've worked you for eight years. There's been time throwing through a baked bean phase. Like, I think you might have missed that. Beans for Brecky. You might have missed that phase. Yeah, I don't think I was around for that.

Lucky you. Beans for Brecky. I remember your Avo Toast phase. Yeah, there was an Avo Toast phase. Yeah, there was an avatose phase. I don't think about that with breakfast. I've had the same thing every day now going on when we've done this job like six, seven years. Oh, no, you bring in your banana?

Oats and banana. And oh my God, when we're out of honey. Don't. Doesn't the receptionist know about it? Sally, we're out of honey. My goodness. Oh, my God. But you're a creature of habit.

Yeah, yeah. The boy needs his hun' honey. Every now then I might bring in a boiled egg, but I have to boil it the night before. I don't know if I've ever noticed you bring it a boiled egg. That's way worse than a can of beans. I've never noticed that. I don't think I've ever done it. But every down then I might.

That's very farty. Isn't it, a boiled egg? Yeah, well, yeah. I like a good boiled egg, though. Do you peel it at home or are you peeling it free? Bring it here, peel on the kitchie. Yeah. Maybe I'll get that off Babster peel.

I tried to make my kid a boiled egg the other day. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't eat boiled eggs. Oh, my God. Trying to pick the shell off and all the divvits. It was probably soft boiled. See, the hard of the boil are easier to peel. Okay, because it looked like a meteor.

There's so many crevices in it. When you don't get that, like, there's that little film part. If you don't get that and you get it in between, it rips the egg apart. and destroys it. It's annoying. I literally tried to serve it to her. She looked at me like, what is this garbage? There's actually nothing more sad than a really, really badly peeled boiled egg.

Like, it's quite sad. That's why cafes don't boil it for. You boil it yourself. I don't want the responsibility. Yeah, I always get poached when I go to cafes. I mean, who's ordering a boiled egg? Can I got one boiled egg, please? All right?

You weirdo? Hey, if you like it, you like it. I want to do that. Now, egg soldiers is one of the great things to have. Is that where you dip your toast in? Soft boiled, chop off the top. You can leave the shell on and you can dip your toes. You can't do that with a hardball, can you?

There's no yoke. Nothing to dip. There's nothing to dip. Yeah. Don't want to be doing that. No, thank you. I'll stick with me a can of beans. Oh.

You don't have to peel a can of beans, too. I just pop the lid. Yeah, you just do that. Put in the microwave. Does she like beans? Yeah, she's a big eye. Huge bean gal. Open to a can of Borlotti.

We just ate them for a snack. What's Borlotti? A type of bean. I know. It's wonderful. Just eat it. A little one bean at a time. Yes.

You have a bean? One for you, one for me. You're a baked bean, guys, shogar? No. Not a ban. I don't eat them often. Shaggy roll. Canned spaghetti also no.

Can't spaghetti's trash. Shokka rolled in with two bananas today. I did. That was strange for you. It's a big day because we got a meeting. We've got a meeting. Don't we, Shogar? Yeah.

You're going to be in a potassium overload today. Well, I haven't eaten any of them yet. Oh, I only bought. Well, I bought the good one in the studio, but I haven't eaten it yet because you don't like to smell of bananas. No, I don't. It hasn't stopped you before. What's so different about today?

Oh, thank you for once in your life. Between these eggs and your bananas. Goodness me. I'm the stinky one. I'm going to bring boiled eggs in tomorrow just for the team, you know? Who wants a boiled egg? I'll bring a banana. You bring the eggs.

What are you going to bring? Yeah. Baked beans. And I won't shower. It'll be a whole thing. We're out of here. Grab the podcast. We'll see you tomorrow.

Bye. Bye. Let's do it clean, kid. Long as I get. Market, I'm good. Jess and Ducko! That was the Jess and Ducko podcast. Take a trip to McDonald's Land today

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