Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | drikk ansvarlig

Episode Date: November 16, 2025

NRL player turns Mayo spokesman Kalyn Ponga calls into the show, Jess realises she's queen on the AUX and Ducko runs us through his colonoscopy!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The new macho range is here at the Maccaffe. Jess and Douggo. This is the Jess and Douggo podcast. Podcast, fuck yeah. Recall the power. We live in the day yet. Podcast, fuck yeah. Hi, podcast, people.

I'll tell you what, even my, we're having some tech. Have some tech issues. Even my headphone volume, it doesn't feel as loud. Like, where I normally sit, it's not feeling as loud. I don't think you're the same person this week as you were last. Like, you've been flushed. I'm clean. I've repented my suits.

I reckon it's changed to you. I have purged. I've perched. You've perched. Yeah. Lost three kilos in the process. After the conoscopy, lost 3.2 actually. That's crazy.

And it's annoying because you do feel good because everything's out of you, like in that regard. Is it like a detox? Yeah, it is. It's like a juice cleanse. But you don't feel good because you're so hungry and malnourished. Yeah. So like... How was the brain?

Like in terms of... You know what? I was okay. Like, I was like on the phone. Like talking to mom, I was doing some things. Like, I was, yeah, I was pretty with it and together. Like, I wasn't. Not that sort of delirium.

You know, like when you're tired, you get started getting foggy, silly, losing words, bloody crash on the car. Not the same. Not the same. Not the same. But even Morgan was like, geez, you don't seem too bad for someone who hasn't eaten in like 46 or 47 hours. Jesus.

Yeah. It gets to a point where you get so hungry that you're just like not hungry anymore. Yeah. Like you get over that hunger, you just sort of. How psychological it all is. Yeah, it became a bit of a battle. It became a bit of a mental warfare. Honestly, though, I can't fucking begin to tell you how shit wiping your ass becomes when you are on the tour that much.

Like, it is just... And it's not solid, is it? No, it is like you turn a tap on. Jesus. You feel your guts gurgle, and then you just sit on the toilet and you don't even need to put... It just all just comes out of you. Evacuate. Evacuates.

To quote Giscata. Evacuate the dance floor. Vacuate the dance floor. It all just, it falls out of you. That's crazy. It's like the vomiting bug. That's squatty potty must have. Yeah, but you know, in the end, I couldn't use it because it was almost getting me up in too much of a position.

You just need to sit there. Oh, just let it happen to you. Yeah. So the first time, the very first time, I had the juice and nothing happened. I was like, oh, I don't feel good. Two hours later, I felt fine. And then I needed to, like, fart. And I was like, got up and I like let out a bit of a fart and then just trickled down the leg.

Tricled down the leg. And I was like, oh. Was your senior moment? You should have that. Yeah, incontinence moment. When you misjudge a fart. And then I realized from that moment on, any far of the next 48 hours, can't be trusted. Even the day after, like, it was like, couldn't be trusted.

So you just, you didn't sleep? No, I did. I probably got to sleep at 1.30. Yeah. And then I probably, rubber sheets? Yeah, yeah. Well, by that stage, I was on the couch because I didn't want to go on the bed. And Morgan's like, coming to bed, I'm like, no, you don't, you don't want this.

Nah. You don't want this. Let's, let's, I'll see you in a few days. Yeah. So I slept on the couch and then I woke up, like, I think I came off the toilet one. And then I woke up and it was like 6.30 or seven. Oh, that's not too bad. I got like five hours.

Wow. Yeah. Oh, it just sounds brutal. It's not fun. And you can't like... Everyone's going to have to go through it in their lifetime, guys. Totally. Totally.

Yeah, yeah. I really misjudged. What's the one where you're shit in an ice cream container and send it off? That's, um... A bowel cancer. I think that... They scint. Yeah, colonoscopy four.

But if you, if your shit came back with something worrisome, I think they'd be like, go get a colonoscopy. I don't think it's as much as an ice cream. It's like a swab. It's like a little swab, yeah, yeah. But you do shit into a container they give you. I mean, that's a lot of shit. That's a lot of shit.

You should say, I've done that much. I could send it up. Yeah, have you already been pretty regular today? There's part of me just you say, yes, I have actually. Good, good. Part of you talking about this process, not obviously the starvation. Yeah. But just the mental fortitude.

Yeah. You know you have to do it. Like I've done a juice cleanse before for detoxing. There was no stakes. So I gave in after about. 12 hours. Yeah. I didn't like it.

I didn't want to do it. Whereas when the stakes are that high, I almost want to challenge myself. Because then, you know, if you muck it up and you go on there and they say there was any poo in there, see you later.

Start again. What's a colonic irrigation? I don't know. Have you heard of a colonic? You're the arms. Yeah, yeah. Shoot water up your arthur. Yeah, see, that feels nice too.

Oh, yeah. Put the pipe in there and you see it all come out. So I don't think that's medical. I think it's more wellness. Why can't you just do that to then get a colonoscopy? That's what I'm. Yeah. Like, why do you have to starve yourself?

Like, it feels like such an old thing to do. Do you know high up the bowel that goes? Well, your intestines twist around. Yeah, it must go all the way. They gave me photos because you can see inside your thing. It just looks like, you know, circles, whatever, like a little worm. But there was like 12 photos, I think I had. So I must just keep going around every corner.

What's the difference between intestines and bowels? I don't know. Are they into changeable words? Or is the bowel its own body? I think is the bowel, I don't know. Is the bowel the end? The bowels are lower, I think. Well, your colon's at the bottom.

I don't know. How bad we don't know our own anatomy. Oh, here we go. The bowel is part of your digestive system. It's made up of the small bowel, i.e. small intestine. There you go. It's the same. And the large bowel.

The bowel is made up of the colon and the rectum. Okay. And the rectum? Yeah, but the poop shooter one. That goes up and around. Up and around. Yeah, the poop shooter. Yeah.

Whereas the one's inside is your other. God, the bowel is working very. very hard. That's where we're getting all the nutrients absorbed from our food. Without a breaking it down. We are effed. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's a full thing. It is very interesting. There you go. It goes like this. See the little torch?

Is that how high it goes or it goes through all of it? Does it get into the large? I don't know how high it goes. I don't know. Google. Maybe how high it needs to go? Yeah, how deep. Look at all that.

Yeah, Google that. There's fun facts about how long your intestine. I'm pretty sure if you pulled it out. Yeah, they're long, aren't they? It's a few kilometres, I think. Something insane like that. Maybe it's your veins. I can't remember.

All right, Duck on Babs, you talk amongst yourselves. We'll get bowel facts. Babs, how are you going? I'm good. How are you? You had a great show today. You really enjoyed yourself? Yeah, I did.

It was really fun. All right, I got it. Small intestine, 5.5 meters long. Wow. But that is... Colomitous, yeah, yeah. That's very... Is that me on your shoulders?

I guess. Like, that's tall. Yeah, that is long. It's just all inside you, too. Crazy. It is wild. It says one and a half metres is the usual length of the scope. Scope.

But that doesn't necessarily mean they do that. And I got the thing for, if you were to take every, like, vein in your body and lay it out. Okay. It would be between 19,000, 9,000 and 19,000 kilometers. There you go. So veins, veins. In your body and just laid it out. So mine's more on the 9,000 side.

Yeah, yeah. Shire guys more on the 19K. That's right. That's right. He's got longer veins, being a longer boy. Long vain boy. There you go. Let alone the veins in the Johnson.

Oh, my God. Goodness, man. Do you want some punny business names just real quick? Oh, we're back to that, are we? Really. You need a sick way that way better. Yeah, what we say? You'll hear that in the show.

In about half an hour. Yeah, you will. Yeah, we're talking about puny business name. Or do we save it and do... Oh, we can maybe do it tomorrow. Do you want to do on the phones tomorrow? Yeah, I can even put a question box on the story. I like that.

I like that. Because people were texting in with a few days. Save that. And did you want to do, like, my gastroenterologist was wanting to be a radio announcer? There's got to be something. You wanted to be X. You ended up doing what. Yeah.

What'd you want to be? What are you? And what are you? Yeah, yeah. I love it. That works. Because I also, I mean, Babs, you'll have to filter out. I don't want to hear about, like, failed dreams.

I just want to hear about life's pivots. Yeah. Right. You know, what do you want to be, Babes? Meteorologist. Meereologist. Sorry. How did you?

I did not know that. It did. You know what I heard, numeralogist? I was like, oh, specialising numbers, that's weird. Yeah, I wanted to be a meteorologist for a while because I like the weather, obviously. You do like the weather. If anyone knows anything about the weather, it's bath. It would be the person on the today show at the bomb who's way too close to the camera all the time.

With all her colleagues in the background pretending to type. I actually looked up how the path to get there. And what is it? It's quite hard. You have to do like physics and be really good at maths and stuff. And that's not really me. Really? You can't just read the charts and go, oh, it looks like it's going to rain then.

At a theme part? Yeah, see, so they are the meteorologist. Trust me, I've done weather, and it's not that hard. Apparently. Yeah. It's one thing to be a presenter and it's to be a meteorologist. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it would be cool to just be like,

holy shit, look at the weather system coming in. You should be on Twister. Yeah, I love those movies. You should be like the guy who won the South Australian Senior of the Year. He's a volunteer, research scientist, specialising in climate. You should do some volunteer. You should volunteer. Do volunteer at the bomb.

You'll get more. and you're getting here. Hours in the day. That's true. Sorry, guys. I've got to go. I've got to go volunteering at the bomb. Imagine that.

Let's wrap this up. What are you up to, Babs? I'm just going to volunteer at the bomb today. Babs just sitting behind someone. It's raining. Okay, cool. Babs is the person who changed the warning from red to yellow and copped all the shit. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you want to be, so shy guy? I want to work in music. I want to be like a music manager. Like you represent Justin Bieber. Yeah, like a scooter brawn when I thought he was cool. Yeah, what he ended up in. Yep.

Or like an Rory Gold. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like an agent. Yeah, like an agent sort of vibe. Yeah. Yeah. And then I just ended up here. Do you reckon you're bulldoggy enough?

No. Yeah, I don't think so either. It could be. I think I could be, but I mean, you know. Yeah. There's no. I feel like all the agents represented in at least Hollywood. They're all bulldogs, you know?

But they can be some nice ones. In the early noughties, they were. I don't think it's the same. Nah, nah, no. Kill them with kindness. Yeah. Yeah. You want to be an actor?

Yeah. Yeah. Always wanted to be an actor, yeah. And you want it to be... A jeweler. Yeah, that's right. Worker bevels. Beavils.

Here I am. Here we are. Succeeding. When I wake a wake, wake up. When you wake up, it's Jess and Taco. Stop what you're doing and listen. You know I got the shit that you like. There's only one show to wake up here.

I'm not that easy to pay. Jess. Anyway, oh, yeah, poor butthole. I'm got to explain. Ducko. What do they look at me? I'm in the nude and they go, Oh, the room is hard for a year's time.

Got him going insane. But all that he called C, C, C, C, C, C, C. Um, yeah, good show. Fuck yeah, talk it. This is Jess and Taco. Yes, it is. Right on 6 o'clock. Hey, welcome to a brand new week.

Welcome to Monday. Hello. Hello. How's your butthole? Ah, question, one should always be asked at 6 o'clock on a Monday morning. You know what? Why have I never asked before? You should always ask?

Five years of friendship, never checked into you, do it. Yeah. And I apologise for that failure of friendship. It's been probed, hasn't it? It has, but the past week or so, it's been a topic of conversation. Yeah, just breaking that stigma down for... Friday afternoon. To colloes, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You obviously, and we made sure I muted you on Instagram, didn't text, because I wanted the real raw rundown. I've got my full conoscopy review, but I had a bunch of people probe me. Just to make sure it was right as rain. Yeah, and everything's right as rain. That's fair. Squeaky clean inside. Squeaky clean. And you know what?

The peace of mind now that I know it's just IBS. Good times. Because you've done bloods. You've done allergy tests. You've done this is now the colonoscopy. All right. It's just me. Yeah.

And you know what? It's just me. And I feel better for it. You're next. You are next. I look forward to you doing yours. It's the amount of people who ask me, why are you getting done? because obviously I'm only, what, 34, and normally it's like 40s and 40s,

and everyone who was doing that when I was there. My dad was very concerned. Yeah. Why is he getting a colonoscopy? What's happening? Is there blood in his stool? No, it wasn't anything like that. Would we share a lot?

He's never told me about blood in the store. I would tell you that, too, if there was. It was nothing like that. Jess, come look. Come check this out. I'll send a photo. It was purely, there was a few times I did bring my wife in the toilet. Is it?

No, it's not. Anyway, I'll flush it. Yeah, we had Beatrid in the burgers. It's okay. Yeah, yeah. Capsica, man. passed away from bowel cancer recently, so I was like, I'm just going to get it checked out. So good, so smart.

And you know what, now I'm good till 45, baby? Here we go. No polyps, no none. You seem lighter. I feel, oh, I lost three and a half kilos. Don't tell perhaps that because you will. It was so, I was so, no energy, though. That's crazy.

No. Yeah, yeah, three and a half kilo. And I put back like two kilos on like that night or the next day when I ate again. Just keep eating. Oh. What was your first proper meal? I know they gave you a sandwich. Hot chicken and chips.

Oh. Yeah, chicken and chips and salad, bit of potatoes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, went paying for that. The sandwich in the hospitals is good, though. Okay. First thing you can eat. Do you reckon they could have given you anything?

Yeah, it would be great. Yeah, yeah. I said, no egg sandwich, though, please. Just give me a chicken or a ham, which they did, which was great. And a little ice block and some Jats. You deserve it. And the funniest thing is waking up for the Klonoski, because everyone who's in there is like, you know,

there was people in there 50, 60, some, even older. And they're all just waking up from the anesthetic, just like shell shook. Just taking so long. Just like, ugh. And I'm just like, Spritly as all. Just energize the buddy. It's like you had an on-off switch. Just turn him off for the procedure.

Turn him back on and he's right to go. And they were playing Rufus when I woke up. Swear to God, woke up through Rufus playing. No, it just happened to me on a playlist. It was a specific playlist that I know. I know the playlist. And it was just on. I said, who's playlist?

And she goes, it's mine. Well, this is, yeah. This is all coming up. This is all coming up. That's when I knew it was going to be no polyps. This cannot be a sign from the universe of bad things to come. Oh, that's, well, I'm glad to hear it. Thank you.

Good on you for taking control of your health, man. Yeah, all check, all systems go. How are you going? Very good. You know what? A weekend away? Weekend away. Yeah.

Caught up with some of my oldest girlfriends. We do this kind of annually around Christmas. This is our thing. They'll see each other during the year because obviously they're all living around each other. But I'm into state. So when I go down, we make it a weekend. Yeah. Hit some wineries, do some fancy lunches.

Get lose. It's not really my thing. They'll be too fine dining. Some of my friends, I'm like, you boogey bitch. See, you're pretty bougie. You're pretty bougie, but you're not like... See, I'm bougie, but not when it comes to fine dining. Yeah, you don't like degastation.

Yes, I'm a jam. I don't want people throwing garnishes on and coming out with the nitro, you know, where it like smokes up. I don't need that on a dessert, thank you. Yeah, you're going to your pizza. I'm happy with a pizza, a wine tasting and megalse. But no, it was, it was wonderful. Lovely to see them. Cup is full.

Cup is very full. Cup is very full. How's the flight home with Lucia? I've been hung over. Was it a bit cooked? It wasn't great. And she is now too, which means you have to buy them, their own seat. Oh, yes.

So, Ducco, you'll look forward to this. When she was carrying on, if she was on my lap, I could just sort of bear hug her. Yeah. And we can make it work. Seat belt stays on. She's in her own seat. She's taking the seatbelt off. She's standing up.

The pilot's going, please remain seated like with your man. Sit down. What are you doing? That was a bit challenging. She starts kicking off. Wasn't interested in blue. He wasn't interested in the toys I'd brought, but hey. And what do you do?

We had a good time. I was like, obviously you're in business, so, you know. Oh, you weren't. Oh, my God. I don't know what I've done to upset my husband. How did it feel flying with the common folk? I didn't think seeing it on Instagram.

I was like, I thought the business seats were bigger than that. Yeah, no, I didn't say anything. I'll be honest with you. I was like, maybe you're just flying a different airline. I don't know. I'll be honest with you. When I saw the seat number, it was still relatively high. And I was like, all good.

And then I had to keep walking. And I went, whoa, whoa, whoa. What am I doing here? People are coughing and stuff. Excuse me, there's a bit of mistakes. Yeah, yeah. People are begging for money. Why, no meal?

No meal. Also, who'd you fly with? Well, I don't know. Quantus? Yeah. Yeah. But surely there's a meal still. No, because it's a short flight.

Like, you get a snack. Oh, yeah. I thought Victoria from here would be like a longer. There's an hour or two hours. It's an hour 10. Okay. You get a snack. I want a meal.

Oh, yeah. I'm hungry. And I like plain food. Did you eat the airport? airport, though. Very much so. Yeah. Calories don't count in the airport.

Guess how much I paid? All right, quick price game. Okay. How much did I pay for a small, you know, the half tubes of Pringles? $7. From the airport. Oh, $8.50. I will pay you the amount if you get it on the knocker.

Okay. You're both incorrect. $9. You're incorrect. $12. All right. Chai guys just gone over. $12.

$1.15. For a half-fing. So you see why I wanted a fricking meal. Yeah, airports are the biggest rip-off. Oh my God. Yeah, they are so bad. I couldn't believe it. Airport tax is just ridiculous.

It was insane. Yeah, it's ridiculous. To be fair, it got me three minutes a piece on the plane. Luchet was enjoying her $11 brinkles. Worth it. How are you today, Shire Lord? I'm good. Yeah, I'm good.

I don't have anything. Yeah, you went to Sydney on the weekend? I did go to City on. Catch out with your birds? Yeah, on Saturday night and got back here, like, I don't know, just before midnight. Oh, jeez, gross. The next day I was scored, so I texted Mom and said, I'm going to come up. Beautiful.

So I did that and she's hung out. How is Sharon? She's good. Fantastic. Babs, how are you? You got your gingham dress on today? Must be a big day. Yeah, I'm good.

I'm good. I thought it was ginghamy. Stand up. Kind of. Like, yeah. Give it as well. Is that us? Go on.

Oh, wow. Is that new or just new to the rotation? I haven't worn it in a while. I didn't think it fit me anymore, but apparently it does. It's giving clueless. Oh, my God, I don't know that reference. Okay, sure, thanks. She wouldn't know clueless.

She didn't support you, clueless. Yeah, she knows Clueless. The movie. Alicia Silverstone. Or the Iggy Azelior thing. You're 204. How do you know clueless? Yeah.

It's a staple, isn't it? Evidently. Is it? I don't know what Babs knows. Her breadth of knowledge is so huge. It's bizarre. It's bizarre. It's bizarre.

Well, do you know who Oprah Winfrey is? Yeah, I know. We got tickets, Oprah on the show. It's our co-for. No, call her. That's right. Only one double. Only one. We got one. You get a ticket and that's it. But you also get accommodation.

Yes, you do. So you get involved in the show, any opportunity. Yeah. You could win that on Friday. We got that. We've got Alphbox. Of course, your chance of 10K. Kael and Pong is jumping on today to talk about Mayo. Wait, is the embargoes released? It's after six. Very good. Yes, he's talking about Mayo.

We don't really know why. So we can't wait to ask him why. We also don't know why it was embargo. But it was. But we're in the clear now. Where his first interview, I think. Oh, yeah, he's his first exclusive. Who else can talk with Mayo? We got him, man. We got him.

Can't get him for any night stuff. To be fair, I've got questions why I'm not a Mayo ambassador. Yeah. And Caleb Tonga is. When Shaga, because you were, I think you'd left for the day. Shagga, I was like, do you want to talk to Cala Ponger about Mayo? I was like, Jess loves Mayo, mate. Yeah, so yes.

It's a real synergy. My guy knows me. I'm going to fight him. I'm going to fight him for the crown. Yeah, do it. I'm keen. Why not? I'm leaving.

Let's watch it burn. I want that sweet, sweet, sweet mayo money. 100%. Hey, up next, there's a new study about binge drinking, which we need to be across. Oh, okay. About how it could actually be good for you. Well, after my weekend.

Jess and Ducko. Hey, right now, though, ducking over to Norway. I was going to guess three different countries before I guess Norway. Could have. It's the same music. I'm so keen to go to Norway. Yeah, yeah. I've heard it's very nice.

Yes. Growing whale watching. Ooh. Well, we're here because studies have shown that heavy booze during one's youth, could improve one's chances of success later in life. Now talk to me because I would have thought that's bad for your brain. Yeah. Well, yeah.

Okay, so the beauty of pain and drugs was written by Norwegian psychologist Willie Perston in the University of Oslo and they argued that common drinking when young in groups with friends can help ease inhibitions by acting as a social lubricant. Okay. It can help you get ahead. Socially. Ah, that's the key. Not mentally or physically.

You'd be a great networker. Great networker. You're also exposed to different things at a different age. And different challenges, different challenges, different situations, different regrets. Has Dr Willie gone on to talk about like specific age? Like, are we talking 17? The professor and his colleagues spent 18 years monitoring the drinking habits of 3,000 Norwegians from the ages of 13 to 31.

Mate, Willie did muck around. That's a hell of a study. What a weird study. Hey, we just want to, we know drinking's bad for you as a whole because alcohol is a poison. However, we just follow these kids from 13 to 31. I feel like we could see something. 13 feels too young. Like if a scientist knocks on my door being like,

you've got a 13-year-old, can I just monitor her drinking habits? I'd be like, what are you talking about? She doesn't have any. Exactly. So these are either very honest parents or very sneaky kids. Yeah, true. Who gets their 13-year-old nominated for this study, you know?

But he said that some of the young ones that they really, they followed people who drank a lot and people who didn't. And the ones who drank a lot, particularly in those young, formidable ages, they came out and had more successful careers. They seemed to earn more. They had better relationships. They had more contacts. That's so, I would not put those two things together.

Those who started hitting the stores hard in their late teens and early 20s, both of those high levels of education and income, also because alcohol was so expensive, particularly there. Yes. And it's so expensive now that they had to work to get the alcohol. So basically they were motivated. They were motivated, exactly right. Liberation during one formative years can make one's career age like a fine wine, the study says.

Well, we need an alcohol reference to continue the alcohol study. Obviously. Then they came out and recommended both, Not recommended, though, drinking by yourself does not do anything for you. No, that's just depression, isn't it? You need to call someone. Whereas if you're drinking in a group, it's like, you can be successful. You could be successful.

Because then you don't know in that group who will also go on to do something. Exactly. So then you call them in the 30s, you'd be like, remember the glory days now. Do you want to invest a million dollars in my startup? Yes, I do. Come on in. Maybe we know about crypto. This guy, this guy, man, he could drink.

Anyway, crypto, what do you know about it? That's a hell of a study. Hell of a study. They've really looked into it. I look forward to all the scientists now coming out, being like drinking at 13 will mess your brain up. Well, they've said, yeah, they've said drinking lots has higher, lower life expectancy and, you know,

higher illness and yeah, yeah. Oh, okay, but you'll be rich. But, you know, you're young, man. The connections you would make to brotherhood and sisterhood for the age. How do you say please drink responsibly in Norwegian? Babs, I think you... Quick. Yeah, Babs, how do you say drink responsibly in Norwegian?

Can we show guys out of the room right now, helping pads is some tech issues. So we've asked the worst Googler in the team to Google it in Norwegian. Do we go to a song and come back? And I need you to say it. So drink responsibly in Norwegian. I need you to say it for us on the air.

And I'll know if your pronunciation's off. You're really going to commit. You ready? Drick On's vlog. I bought it. Jess and Ducco. We've got our Alphabox with chance at 10K coming up at 7.

Then Kael and Pong are joining us to chat Mayo, which we're not 100% sure about. I want to fight him. Yeah, Jess is going to fight about mayo. I've been a Mayo ambassador. At least in my own house, since I was like 14. I know. You're drinking the tubs of mayo.

I'm not getting any mayo money. How do he get mayo money? Well, because he's two million followers. Rude. I have more passion. Obviously. Just quickly, Ducco. Yeah, what do we got?

I want to, um, just want to make anyone aware of, I guess, the latest of endangered species, you know? You might be thinking, oh, the bumblebee. Oh, the silverback gorilla. Yeah. Oh, the Tasmanian devil, no. What do we got? Karen. Oh.

The names, the human names. Lauren. Sheila. Oh. Classic Aussie names. Sheila. That were once in the top 100, at least in the 80s or 90s. It was last time you met as Sheila.

Oh. You know, like, I've met a few Karen's and Lauren's and stuff and whatever, but Sheila. You reckon Sheila's already extinct. When was the last time you, if someone goes, I'm Sheila, you're like, are you? It's funny to think there might at one point in history be the last Sheila. Yeah. And when she dies, there is no baby Sheila's. There's no more Sheila's.

Unless someone in her family maybe is pregnant. And then they go, we'll name her after. In your honour. Granny Sheila. Probably just be a middle name though, you know. Yeah, that does seem to be a, or even they go, oh, her middle name is Samara. But that is in honour of the Grandma Sheila. Yeah.

It has the S in common. But Lauren, Karen, Sheila, Amanda, Michelle, Diana. Rounding out the ladies' names that are going extinct. They're in danger Okay. So if you are pregnant, expecting, wanting to have a child,

maybe. Yeah. You'd like to consider these names. Keep it going. They are. They are about to be no more. And no one's going to have them, you know? No one's going to have.

Oh, sorry, I forgot to mention Gladys. Gladys is also endangered. Gladys Bericholian, she did wonders for that name. I wonder if she did. Obviously everyone was talking about Gladys COVID days and she had that scandal. Did Gladys Berogelian put the name back into the pop culture, back into the Zygote?

I didn't know too many Gladys before Gladys was, you know. Funny, we're talking about Kalyn Ponger coming up on the show. I remember meeting a family who had like a two-year-old named Kalan because they loved the player. Yeah. When you feel like he's only been on the scene himself for five, six years and yet people already enamored naming their children after him. Yeah.

So similarly, maybe Gladys did good work for the name. I would have thought so. When we look at the gentleman. Yeah, what do we got? Sorry to say to the Johns. R-I-P. John. Look, to be honest, specifically on the list, it says Johnny.

But, like, are you calling your kid Johnny? It's John, right? You call them John or Jonathan, and then they'd get Johnny for sure. This is particularly listed Johnny. Yeah, right. Johnny's such a little rascal name, isn't it? Such a little rascal name. But can you imagine being 45 and, you know, you're a dentist named Johnny?

Yeah, it doesn't work, does it? It doesn't command respect, in my opinion. It's like Johnny Knoxville, the rascal. Yeah, yeah. Bradley. Oh, Brad's going. Maybe Bradley Cooper and Brad Pitt have not done enough. Yeah, there's some big hitting Brad's.

Julius? I don't know any Julius. I do. I know Julius. My mate's dad. There you go. Well, tell him. He might be one of the last flag bearers.

I thought Caesar would have done a great job for the Julius's. Unfortunately not. Geez. This is a biggie. Who we got? Gary. Gary is in danger. No, Gary.

Nice. Go bowling, Gary. Because all the Garries I know, exactly. Friends, dads. They'd be 50 plus. I've never met a teenage Gary. We're about to have the ashes. You know what I mean?

Nathan Lyon. Gary. Gary the goat. His name's Nathan. Yeah, but Gary the goat, because he's the goat. Who's Gary, though? Nathan Line. Gary the goat.

Why are they called him Gary? Because he's the goat. Gary the goat. So he's Gary a character? Nathan lines his name. Gary the goat, goat, me and grace of all time, because he's your finger spinner. Yep, I know, goat.

And so they call him Gary. He also kind of, I suppose. But what's the Gary connection? Gary the goat. Is it just a name the suspect? Yeah, yeah. Could have been George? I guess, but Gary the goat.

George. The goat does that ring. What's there to get? It just, it all works out. But he's named Nathan. Yeah, Gary. And his name's Lion. Now we've got a goat.

A lion. Nathan and a Gary. Or L-Y-O-N. Oh. This is like our friend named Greg Matthew. Yeah. Who gets called Moe. Yeah.

Because there is, isn't there a cricket? Is that what? Yeah. It's all very confusing cricket nicknames. Gary. You know Nathan Lyon. You know Gary the ball's finger spin. He's playing the ashes this Friday.

I know Mitchell Stark. Oh, you know Nathan Line. Now, I'm going to get a photo. I know Marnas. You know Marnas. You love Marnas. I know Uzman. Wasn't Usman Kowajar the goat?

He's very good, isn't he? No, he's certainly not the goat. He's good. He's not, he's not Gary. Look, Gary. What's the, what's the hot cap. Oh, you can't see. What's the hot captain?

Nathan Lyon. Type and Nathan Lyon. Who's the hot? He's good. Yeah, yeah. He's just nodding. Why are you nodding? Are you nodding because he's hot or because of Gary?

Cummins. Um, Pat Cummins, yeah. Pat Cummins is hot. That's Gary, the goat. I've never seen that man before my life. You've never seen Gary the goat. Are you joking? Bowling, Gary!

Hang on, there's a picture with hair here. Yeah, yeah. He's lost hair now. Oh, he used to be a groundskeeper at the Adelaide Oval and then worked his way up to actually play cricket. Sorry? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is a, what an amazing story.

Why don't I know anything about this person? I don't know. Have you been under a rock? Evidently. Nathan Lines. Anyway, sorry. So, Gary. he's going.

So you're telling, yeah, well, the name is going to become extinct. If it dies with Gary, fair enough. Nathan's all right. Yeah, it's right. Also, Neville is on its way out. Is there any players called Neville? Is anyone's nicknamed Neville? No, there's never Longbottom for Harry Potter, but he didn't do wonders for the name.

He hasn't done. I suppose he got hotter, though. Do you reckon? He had a glow up. Yeah, Babs is not as hot as Pat Cummins, but yes. Oh, all right. Jess and Duckow. Happy Monday, and hey, going an entire day without getting a little troop from Mick Caffee

deserves a little troop from Mick Caffee. Oh, God, you pat yourself on the back. You get yourself that little treat. You get the treat. You got an ice strawberry matcha latte. It's new in their range because you deserve a little treat from a cafe. Why not? I can imagine very aesthetic.

Take a little selfie with that, bad boy. Chuck it on your story. Got a coffee with some friends yesterday. One of them got an ice strawberry matcher. And I was like, what is that monstrosity? Did you have a little sippy sip? I haven't tasted it. Did it look super cute though?

I've grown up. Would it look to set it. Yeah. Yeah, it's like half green, half pink. Yes, it's like the caffeine equivalent of the apparel spritz. Yeah, it's all for the piquis. It is. And then Morgan got her own marcher, and I'm like, oh, she a marcher girl?

Love marcher. Okay. She loves dirt. She's a woman of the earth. She takes her shoes off. As you can tell, I'm not a huge matcha fan, but if you like Marcher, you do you, man. Bart, you're a fan of McDonald's? Yeah, she like, she likes doing marcher, you'll get on board.

Whenever Maccas do it, Morgan does her own marcher at home. So, like, she's got, like, the marcher thing, and she, like, blends it. She goes out, snips the grass, puts in a blender. Yeah, I just give her some of my Sir Walter Buffalo. Your cooch, is it a cooch? Yeah, me Cooch. I'll give us some of me Cooch, we just put it in and this will do, honey.

I had a double take the other day. There's a bloke who drives around. He's obviously a landscaper. And it says like, the Cooch doctor. But I was like, what a name. Yeah, I went. The Cooch doctor. Yeah, because Cooch is.

Yeah, it's another one. No, hooch, you're thinking of. And then Gooch is the other one you're thinking of. Yeah. But see, Cooch, you're just flirting with it. That's why I went, Oh my God, he does mobile appointments. I went, oh, is it a turf guy?

It's allowed. Cooch is another word for a woman's genitalia. Is it? Yeah, that's what I thought. C-O-O-C-H, yep. I think you're talking about like, Oh, that's Hooch. Yeah, that's hooch.

Yeah, no, come on. That's multiple. So Cooch is another word for a ladies. Yeah. But that's not what we're talking about. We're talking about the lawn. I've never. Talk about matro mac as in how good it is.

Absolutely. But we've gone on to the cooch, doctor. There you go. Free advertising. This is not sponsored. I thought just Cooch sounded close to Gooch. I don't know if cooch. It was actually a...

But he's rolling around. And then I was like, why is there a little lawnmower? I was like, oh. Because he's the turf kind. Jeez, what a name. What a name. Take his business. I want to get the Cooch to.

I don't know his number. I'll look him up. Don't leave your wife at home with him, though. Hey, big show still to come. We've got Alphax. Your chance of 10K. K.P. joining us up to seven.

But up next. That's right. I'm going to find him. Yeah, we've got to talk whales next. Oh, I'd love to talk whales. Babs is going to run us through some whales content. The sperm, the humpback. Yeah.

What are we got up next? Babs, which one is it? You got your sperm? Which one is it? I think it is the sperm whale. Excellent news. The blue? We love a blue.

We're going to unpack some whales. They can make sounds like humans, apparently. Jess and Ducko. We were just discussing funny names. You had one for a, it must be a landscaper. That's right. I was driving behind the Cooch Doctor. Yeah.

Great. Which I really enjoy because, yes, we all learn together. I thought Cooch was a euphemism. I didn't know that. For, well, a different sort of landscaping ducco. Yeah, yeah, yeah, which makes it even funnier. But he had a lawnmower on his branding. He wasn't just an ad home.

It depends how long it is. Waxer. We've got some text in on the text line. 04-8-106-9. Aaron said someone in our town has a pet grooming service called doggy-style grooming. Come on. Come on. I'm talking Gianna-Vee.

You've got to pay you these. That is fantastic. If you're going to start a business, you want to have a little fun. You want to have a little fun. You want to have a little fun. Oh, that's nice. If you have more, texting me in 048-8-106-9, because these are funny. They get free shout-outs.

Yeah, these are free shouts. Right now that we need to talk whales. Holy sheet. Sorry. My dad, my dad's here. Holy sheet is good. Yeah, yeah, they sell sheets. That's really.

I got that. Or they clean sheets at least. Could be both. It's double. You never know what they do. Buy the sheets. Bring them back. We'll clean.

Holy sheet, you'll say, when you get it. Wow, look at this, mom. And your mom goes, holy sheet. See, that's also good. It's the name of the business, the service, and the slogan. It really takes care of itself. Now I want to start a business just with a catchy name. Yeah, yeah.

Do you start with the name and then just then work the business out? I think so. Yeah, yeah. Because I feel like otherwise you're pigeonhole. It's like, I really want to be a manicurist. It's like, well, then you've got to stay in nails and claws. We can do this together, guys. We can put our brains together right now to come up with our own cool business name.

What do we sell, though? No, no, that's the point. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Let's come up with a great name. Come up with a great name first. The service will come second. You know what I mean?

That's how all the great ideas are generated. That's how Holy Sheet was generated. And Doggy Star-Grooming. They're like, I'm not even interested in Manchester, but I am now because I want a business called Holy Sheet. I suppose it would help if we knew what we were selling, though. It feels a little blue sky. It would help if we just had it. We don't play by the rules.

Let's just honed in it on an idea. You reckon the Cooch Doctor was already a landscaper? No way. I reckon he came up with Cooch Doctor and went, I will be a landlord. I'm now going to move into landscaping. Same with doggy style. Doggy style's fantastic. That guy just liked it.

And then he's like, hang on, I don't know what I could do. I can clean dogs. Yeah, what do you got, Shaughey's doggy style, Grail?

You're furiously Googling over there. I found someone read it, just some fun ones. All right, all rightle some off. Hit us. Hit us. There's a company that toes camels.

And it's called... Camel toe. Yeah. You can say that. I don't know if I can... Why? Why can't you say that? We just said doggy style.

We've said cooched dogs. There's another one. Curl up and dye, as in curl like hair curls. It's a hairdress. Hair dress. Oh, that's not bad. Curl up and die. Yeah, do we do that?

Do we co-opter saying? Yeah. Oh, I know. A bird in the hand is worth doing the bush and we're waxes. What's with the bird though? I like, okay, we're waxes. Bird, ladies. Yeah, yeah.

We do ladies waxing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or, yeah. A bush. We could start a tire shop and we can call it totally independent tire service or tits. That's great. Is that what someone's done? Yeah, someone's done.

Yeah, that's in her. Totally independent. Oh, see, that's another wrangle. We look at an acronym. Tits is good. Yeah, that's fun. CEO of Tits. Do you reckon these companies that have these funny punny names actually get work?

Because people like us would be like, oh, let's get them. But you reckon about people thinking, geez, Tits doesn't do good tires. I'm not going to go to them. Like, do you take the kooch dock seriously? A bird in the hand in the bush or whatever. I don't know if I want any of them near me. It's an expensive. signed to if we're paying per letter.

They're coming to Shiregard, me on reception. Welcome to a bird in the hand, a hand in the bush or whatever we're doing. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. You need to learn the saying before we call our business. Welcome to a hand in the bush. How can I help you? Okay, now I know the business. You and I have talked about if radio doesn't work out starting a deli.

Oh, yeah. Remember? And we only sell ham. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, the ham deli. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ham guy. Yeah, yeah.

What about? The ham bros. No, they're not funny now. Pork brothers. The pork swords. The pork, the porksons. The pork lutenants? Porkslingers.

The pork slingers. The porkslingers. The porks is good. Sorry, are we on edge? Yeah, we are. I was going to tell you about sperm whales, but this has been more fun. This has been way more fun. Wales can make vowel sounds and this is the sound.

That really, does that mess with your frequency? It messes with the system. Sorry, I thought my headphones were just winking out. That was the whales. Oh, no. Anyway, sorry. Anyway. It's disgusting.

Funny names. It's funny. Yeah. Did you have, hit us with one to get out of here, Shagga? Take your time. Yeah, you know. All right. All right.

You got a florist. Name Florist Gump. That's funny. I don't hate that. Jess and Duckow. Want to hear me fight an NRL player? Yes. Coming up after seven.

I look forward to it. Kael and Ponger, Daly M winner. I don't care. He stole my ambassatorship. Yeah. Mayos. Oh, you should be the. The Mayo ambassador.

What's the Mayo brand? Helmonds. He's a Helmonds, is it? I don't, yeah. I'm not, too versed on my mayos. Actually, let's just get this in. I'm a cupy guy. Let's just get this in the sand right now.

Yeah. Whose side are you on? Yours. Thank you. Yeah, yeah. Because I know you like, Kaelan. He's a good person. Yeah, yeah.

But in this fight, I need you pick a side. Yeah. Oh, hey. No Switzerland here. I'm team mayo, you know. And that's team Jess. And that's you. He doesn't suck it out of the bottle from the fridge in the middle of night.

Thank you. Are these the questions that were asked? I don't know. Anyway, Kailen's joining the show after seven. Anyway, just now, this is a bit of fun. This crossed my feed, and I thought I need to share it with the team. A clip has resurfaced from 1982, and I thought, why not bring this up? I love when I see these headlines, and I go, oh, that's as interesting, 15 years ago.

Huh? This is 1882. This is even longer. There's a choir from Australia, and they were known as the Australian tongue choir. Obviously, didn't quite catch on. Tongue choir. Yeah, the tongue choir. So they basically sing songs.

Well, they make songs, but it's only with their tongues. I mean, tongue is vital to speech. Vital, vital. So you could argue every choir is a tongue choir. Well, this is no words. It's all just sounds. So the song was the Moscow Knights. And instead of the traditional singing, yeah, of course you are.

You won't know. But I just want you to listen. I just want you to listen. This is a group of dudes only making sounds with their tongues. It was quite religious. It's nice, isn't it? I feel like Pope Leo is about to pop in. Some of the comments are fantastic.

Like, wives tagging their husbands going, can you practice? Join the tongue. Or any of these like single? Or even looking like, they may be ugly, but I know when they've all got hot wives. How to keep your wife? Be 101. Yeah, yeah, join the tongue choir.

Honey, I want to take out the tongue choir. Oh, is that your audition for the tonguequ? Jess and Ducco's 10K Alphabet on Hidtabbergs. 30 seconds, 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. I have to take your first answer. You cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. Of course, we come back if there's time.

We're playing for 10K. Our player today is Jade. Hello, Jade. Hey, how you go? Jade, we couldn't be better, Dahl. How are you for a Monday? Not too shabby, I believe. Not too shabby.

What's motivating you? To come to the Justin Ducko program, why do you want our 10 grand? We're building a retaining wall and I need some fun. Okay. Retaining walls. Cont cost cash. Oh, yeah, they do.

And that's the letter you're going to work with today, J. C for cash. Okay. All right, you ready to rock? Yes. All right, your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter C, We need you to name.

A chip flavour. Cs. An ocean animal. Pass. A noun. A flower. Camellia. A vegetable.

Collie flower. An action film. Call of juicy. An Italian dish. Cheesy macaroni. A beauty brand. A fabric. Poth.

Mans is there, Ducco? There's a bit to get through there. There was some things going on there. We got ourselves three, maybe four. A chip flavour off the bat. You said C, C. That's a brand. Okay, you want to... Yeah, we need a flavour.

Chip flavour. So chicken or cheese and onion. Yep. An ocean animal could have been the humble crab. An action film. You said, Call Judy. That's a video game. We could have had Conair, Casino Roy. Connie, what a helm.

Now, here's what I wanted to hear down to the pointe An Italian dish. You said cheesy Mac. I'm all in happy to accept that. Cheesy Mac feels Italian-like to it. Hey, I'm not the scorer. Ducco is the scorer. Canola. That's what we could have had.

I'm Carbonara. I couldn't talk about Carbonara more on this show. But, you know, in the sake of Monday, cheesy Mac, I think I'll allow it. You're pioneers. I think I'll allow. Take yourself four. Thanks, docker.

No, no stress. A beauty brand could have been a set of. fill and a few others. Look, you don't get the cash. I think we know that. You do get $100 to spend at Pillow Talk, though. That's all yours. Amazing. Thank you so much. Jay, thank you for joining the show, Dahl. Have a great day, guys. We too. We play again, 8 o'clock. I mean, you're going to give her points for creativity. Nope.

Jess and Ducco. Joined by a guest right now. Interesting collaboration as well. That's one way to put it, Ducco. Mayan's. We're talking mayonnaise, Jess. One of your favorite things on the planet. Hellman's mayonnaise. Top three favorite things. Definitely up there with my favorite condiment. Never had a knock on the door like a friend of ours has.

And there are questions to be asked. So Helmonds are serving up the world's first mayo dispensing bow tie with the one and only, Kaylin Ponger, who joins us right now. KP, good morning. Good morning. Good morning, guys. How is? Well, I mean, mate, not good.

It's tense in here, Kaylin, because Jess loves her mayo. You're lucky you're on the phone, champion. Because if you would come in, this would have been much more awkward to your face, where do you get off being the mayonnaise ambassador? How much do you love Mayo? And is it more than me? She loves mayo. I can feel in your passion that you have a, you love your mayonnaise.

So maybe I don't love it as much as you, but you might be in for a treat. You might be able to sneak your own mayonnaise into some restaurants, which I don't think you do at the moment, do you? This is true. Now, this is the beauty of the bow tie and that you are the face. base of Kalen, it's got a secret compartment. You load up with the mayonnaise. So if your meal comes and there isn't enough mayo,

or God forbid, no mayo at all, you can secretly squirt it out, right? Yeah, yeah. So it was a fun campaign, teaming up with Helmand and Rainer, the designer of the bowtie and the suit. Interesting enough, one in five Australians sneak, actively sneak.

For their food in? Like their own, yeah, their own sauces into restaurants. and that's over 4 million people. And, yeah, that was sort of a, this is sort of a play on that. So, Jeff, now you can sneak your sauce in even easier. It says here, mayo's the second most smuggled condiment in barbecue sauce number one, 37%. Mayo, 34% of Aussies are smuggling in their mayo into restaurants. See, this is the thing.

I've got some mates who smuggle in hot sauce, which I also know is in the top three. They've got the tiny Tabasco on their key rings and stuff. So the mayonnaise bow tight, this is amazing. So, yeah, how does it work, K. When you've got, so you've just got this on and you've got to lean over, I'd imagine while the bow tie is on and you squirt in? Do you bring the burger up to your chin? Which, what's the logistics here?

No, you've got to lean a little bit. Look around, make sure no one's looking and lean into it. Just lean into it. What's the squirt velocity like, Kaylin? Yeah, how's the squirt race? It's got some power? You'll see today. It launches today, the promo and everything.

Okay, okay. So it's going to be a video? There's a video of it. Don't get too excited. Or get excited, either one. You make up your mind not going to tell you what to do. So my question with this is, do you just need to be in a suit at all times? Like, if I'm going for a casual dinner out, like Chinese on a Tuesday, they don't have enough mayo.

Like, do I need to turn in the tux? Yeah, can I? Wait. Yeah, once you see the bow tie in the suit, you're going to have to dress up. It's a fancy dress sort of dinner. But you can take it, you can take it down to your cafe if you want, put it on some toast. Honestly. Do whatever you please with it, really.

Camels, I'm the face of it. You now do whatever you want. I'm just gifting you the bowtoe, baby. K.P., when you got the tap on the shoulder from Helmans, from Rainer, I mean, we follow you on Instagram, obviously. I thought I knew you pretty well. Would they like, this guy likes his sauce? Like, he needs to be the face of it.

Or did you go to them saying, hey, this is one collaboration. No one's approached me for. I want to expand my horizons. Nah, I think it's a sort of a fun, playful, sort of, like serious at the same time, but there's definitely a fun playful sort of campaign. And I, that must have looked at me and said, this guy's fun and playful. He's a little rascal. What do you think, K.B.?

He's in fun and blackful. Yeah. I like, yeah, it's, yeah, it is like a, it's a sort of a, not a gimmick, but, um, on those stats. But it's sort of playing on that. And, yeah, no, once you see it all, it is pretty fun. But at the same time, semi-serious. So, how do we get our hands on one? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You can enter the draw, which the information will be on my Instagram post. Okay. I'm not too sure if you can enter multiple times, but it just pops up a hundred times. I think we know who is. I've got my personal email. I can use one of my husband's email addresses. I'll be, I'll get my hands on all these. And then last question before you go, KP, can you re-top up the mayo bowtie when the bowtie runs out of mayo?

Yeah, it's recyclable. You can put as much mayo in there as you want. Right. Refills. Lots of refills. Well, mate, this has a bit enlightening. I look forward to the post that comes out. The other players are like, oh, yeah, I'll have a break before preseason starts.

Not KP. No, man. Yeah, yeah. Always working. If you see Kalen at the local cafe wearing a bow tie and a t-shirt, you know he's got mayo in that bad boy. He keeps leaning over his burger with the bun. No, it looks casual.

Okay, do you give out the listeners permission? If they see you in a bow tie, you have to give them mayo if they ask. You have to give him a squirt. Yeah, he'll squirt. There's nothing going on. It's secret. It's B-I-A. Oh, secret squirt.

The first rule of mayo bowtie. Don't talk about them. Just a little headnone. We need to delete this whole conversation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just the headnode. Hey, thanks for coming on, Mayo, man. Appreciate it.

Thanks, guys. Thanks having me. I spent the weekend with some of my oldest girlfriends. We all met probably circa 2010. We all worked at the International Airport in Melbourne, where I hail from. And we've maintained a friendship ever since, and it's so nice to have known these girls. You know, early 20s, I think I was 19 at the time. And now, obviously, in our adulthood, a couple of kids amongst us, a couple are married,

but we've maintained the friendship. What are you called? The United Nations, because we all have different ethnicities. Yeah. And we've been at an airport. It feels like it works on a couple of levels. But I am certainly not the cool one of the group. What?

I'm just, I don't know. You're the cool one everywhere else. I'm absolutely. I'm going to not just be there. You know when, like, you've got your new friends that you've met maybe at adulthood, maybe through work or social sport or whatever, you're locked in as you are in your 30s, for example, whereas these girls knew me from 19. Right.

So when you go back to those groups, it's like we go back and we're locked into our original. Yeah. Even though all these things have happened in our lives, I'd argue I have the coolest job. But it's one of those things where it's, I go back to being kind of. The same as you were at the airport. The loser of the group. Yeah. But I had arguably the coolest moment on the weekend.

So we were doing a wine tour and we'd spent the afternoon getting lit, having tastings, having nice lunches. And we had a driver for the day. One of the girls had organised, we're going to be looked after. Fabio's with us the whole day. Fabio. Fabio has got a great sound system in his, you know, eight-seater fan. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And my friend...

The suss bus that he drives? I love suss bus. That's fantastic. Because he's also doing multiple jobs. He's like, well, when I drop you guys off, I then go and get group B. Of course. So everything's changing. He's hustling. Fabio is hustling?

Fabio is hustling? How many girls is Fabio hitting on? Just with that name alone. Oregon, he's gone through 18 girls in a day. You know, he's making bank. But my friend Emily, she's kind of the, she's kind of table captain in this group. She organizes everything. She's admin.

Wow. So we do what Emily says. She's in the passenger seat because she is on the speaker. Right. She's on the phone. She's on the Spotify. She's hooked into Fabio sound system. Yeah.

Cranked up. And she's like, ladies, text me, what songs you want. Instead of trying to shout over. Yeah. So, loud. I'm in the back, Ducko. You flinging off text. Right.

So this was my first song choice. And it gets the girls absolutely. So basically, every forgotten banger that you've ever done that's never gotten up, you put forward to the girls. Okay. I thought you might have picked that up, maybe song three or four. You've absolutely, now, I went through my bang as this. I remember this bang and I didn't get up.

This is song too. Yeah, okay. And the girls again, like, yes. This one won. This one did win. Yes. And I'm getting all these kudos. Yes, Jack.

So you just go through your layers. One of the girls bats up glamorous by Fergie. Oh, I don't mind being glamorous. G. It's a great song. El. Immediate buzz kill. G, getting the bin.

Jess Farch, another option. Another loser for bang is, my friends, absolutely loving it in the car. I'd be like, I'm out. Song forward, Bucco. Yeah, this works. Geez, we're really going on a, you know, on a path here. We are going on a journey. This works.

I've never felt more in charge of the vibe and nailing the vibe. Yeah. Because here when I butt up music, I am made with such derision. Yeah, except for Sean Paul, they all sound the same. This was my fifth song. Here we go. When you've got a group of mid-30s women who are buzzed on a wine tour,

heading to the bloody pub to have a boogie because we heard there's a DJ. Med by 8 p.m. Obs. I've just never, obviously. Fabio's picking us up at 9.30. Don't be silly. I've just never felt that kind of rush. So you... You've been table captain before, but you've never been

awesome of your iPod captain. Playlist Poncho I've never been playlist head head poncho I like iPod captain iPod captain

I've never been iPod because I still feel like Jess's whip and her iPod being like Hey guys I found a new song on my nanow I'm going through my roller decks of songs

It's a hell of a feeling isn't it nailing the barn This is the first time in history Jess has had anyone ever liked the songs that she liked Yes

Yes Wow Anyway it was really just That's cool It's quite a moment for me Jess and Ducko Come on baby Let me grab a book from my shelf

Let me sing all the lines for you You know you gotta pick the melody So you could score a point or two Book top box Babs is in studio She's pulled a book What have you got This one's called Shield of Sparrows

Ooh fantasy Yeah it says Fear the Monsters we make Fear the monsters we make. That's deep, man. I don't remember reading this, to be honest. They're all the same. She is.

There's fairies and sex. No. And sparrows, isn't it? Sparrows, yeah. She is keeping the physical book trade alive and well. 99% of the population has moved to Kindle, an e-book. I do have a Kindle. I don't know.

Oh, there you go. Well, anyway, first song you got for us today. All right. But there had been no. No reason to exclude me today. I was a nothing princess can tend to blend into walls and cold play. A cold play Skyful Stars. Coldplay.

I was closing. Avila Vita. You can't play the handicap. You do start singing it. You were on that one because you saw Coldplay lie. I did. God damn it. It's all right.

Point to doco. Next one. It's always good to start well. That's why I can never get off the ground. All right. But there had been no reason to exclude me today. I was a nothing princess content to blend into the walls and stand a pace behind my sister. I was father's insignificant.

Oldest daughter born to his dead wife I was already engaged to his general. I thought I had it. Yeah, so I had it at the start and kind of lost it. There had been no reason for anyone in my family, too. Suspect that catch Prince Xavier's eye. Oh. My hands begin. To shake, I'm not a spy.

I'm not a warrior. I'm sure as hell not an assassin. Can we have a clue? I can do this. Who's the artist? The weekend. Oh, I can feel my face. Yep.

I was still thinking about it. Anyone gets a point for that. I think that's just a... No, I thought that was obvious. It is when you say it. That's one of few directions for me. Yeah, dear. Really?

Yeah. Yeah, that was on you, Bab. Yeah. I agree. It's so it's okay. Then I saw it lost it. I was getting to the weekend, but then I'd pivoted. Oh, sorry, guys, I'll do better.

I'll take you. No, lift. You should probably give us a point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, all right. I'm sorry, Majesty. Breel's cheeks were flush, sweat, beating. How to tell you're in the voting,

her brown, The, her, above, the... Don't stop believing. Yes! Yeah! They're out between me and that's... I'm going to do my Christmas shopping. It was that opening no, and she went high.

We got it. Yeah, okay. All right. For the win now? Yeah, for the win. Unless Jess gets it. Then we go to a time break. I only got it last word because she gave me half of the title.

No, no, no, no. You can get this one. Oh, here we go. Riky Martin. It's not really hard. All right. Since we'd left the throne room Margaret had done exactly

His father had instructed Oh It's all-star smash ma'am It is Hey now You're an all-star Get you game on Say that

Shag I wins Maybe I should train Yeah, you should I train We could do some practice Yeah, maybe we could do practice Yeah, how do you train for it though You're going to have bads drive around with you And just say

Maybe I'll go back and listen to your podcast Yeah just read Just comes over from three to four on a Monday This game's got about three or four goes left, so. Are we bringing her back? Oh, I mean, it's up to you guys. I won't be here. Actually, yeah, you're right.

Let's kill it. Hey, you might, whoever replaces me, you might beat that person. I could. Oh, I'll train in secret over Christmas. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alfa Bucks on Hint. 30 seconds to answer, 10 questions all starting with the same letter. I have to take your first answer.

Cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. Of course, we come back. If there's time, we are playing for 10K. Our player today is Anna. Good morning, Anna. Good morning. Anna.

What? Do you want to spend 10 grand on? I want to take the family to New Zealand so we can see the snow. Oh, lovely. Beautiful skiing, snowboarding, tobogging, just beautiful sights. Yeah, they haven't seen it before, so they're pretty pumped. Okay. Yeah, you want to do that.

Has it been a great season over there this year, I believe. I think maybe it poured. late, you know. It dubs late. It dubs late. It's done like. All right. Well, make sure you check the dump.

Before you book your trip. Ten grand, obviously, will go a long way. I'm trying to think, Doug, you've been to New Zealand. Help me out with the letter. Wanika. Oh, my God. Of course, we're your cousins live. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

A nice place to visit might also be Warnika. Starts with W. Anna, and that's what you're going to work with. Okay. All righty. You ready to go? I'm ready to go. Your time will start after the first question.

Starting with the letter W, You need you to name. A kitchen utensil. With. A flower. Istonia. A clothing brand. Witchery.

A reality TV show. Pass. Something in the bathroom. A window. A breakfast food. Sweeping. A musical. A wind in the willow.

An accessory. Pass. An adjective. A Wink. A mythical creature. Great player though. We had some toughies in there. Look, he got yourself six.

Damn. Okay. No Winnaker. No Wannica for you. A reality TV show could have been Wife Swap or Wipe Out. That one's come up a bit. It's come up a bit, hasn't it? Let's lock in Wife Swap team.

What else is that? A musical. You said Wind in the Willow. I also think it's the wind. Yeah. And is that just a movie? I don't even know if it's a musical. I don't know.

Could have been wicked, though. Or West Side Story. Yeah, wicked. An accessory was a watch. And anyway, everything else you got, you correct. $100 coming your way to spend at Pillow Talk, though. You don't get the money. And Wind in the Willow is a musical, but it's the Wind in the Willow.

Oh, okay. That's a frog, man. That frog. That's all I remember from it. Yeah, yeah. Look, Anna, I'm sorry. You do not get the cash. Enjoy the Pillow Talk, and thanks for playing.

I will. Thank you. Thank you, Anna. Oh, dang. We do play again tomorrow. Seven and eight. But we're talking about Oprah Winfrey. Ooh, W for Winfrey.

Oh, yes. We've got a chance, your first chance at least for the week, to win the call of fame. You get involved in the show. You could walk away with tickets and accommodation. Up next, we're talking seniors' moments. You don't have to be a senior to have a senior's moment. Yeah, everyone can have one. You don't get discounted bus prices, but I can still have a senior's moment.

It's just fun calling at a senior's moment. It is. It is. We're going to take it. We're going to celebrate them. Yep. After there was a doozy of a seniors moment Probably in the right place For a senior's moment

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're discussing having seniors' moments. That's right. I mean, no disrespect to the seniors out there, but that is a well-known phrase For a slight oopsie daisy. Oopsie. Your brain has just failed you.

Ooh, brain fart might be another way to describe it. Yep. Have you had a seniors moment? When was your last senior moment? Because the one that's making headlines. today, Doco, it couldn't be at a more perfect place for a senior moment. It was at the 2026 senior South Australian of the Year awards. So you might have seen this on your social media feed, even on the news.

All the states are currently doing their New South Wales Australian of the year finalist, Victorian Australian of the year finalist. I didn't realize each state had their own. So each state is doing it and then you go into basically the national one. So for New South Wales, we obviously said Alison Thompson and Ned Brockman, Good friend of the show. Vic announced there's Carrie Bickmore, of course, from our own hit family, Vic Australian of the Year.

And you've obviously got Senior, you've got Ozzie of the Year, got young Aussie of the Year. But South Australia, it was their turn over the weekend. So they're going through their nominees and the winners of the different categories. They get to Senior South Australian of the Year. Now, the two presenters, I mean, I don't know what's happened, Ducco, but we've pulled this audio from obviously,

the press conference. Nine News is replaying it. This is them celebrating, declaring who has won Senior South Australian of the Year. The 2026 Senior South Australian of the Year for South Australia is Malcolm Benoit. Congratulations Malcolm. The judges are conferring for a second. Is this like the Oscars? It is a little bit like the Oscars. A senior Australian of the year is in fact James. Is it James? It is James. James Curry. Okay. So, I don't even know how to justify

because it didn't look like they're wearing earpieces. It was like they were feeding off the people in the crowd going, oh, sorry, did we read the wrong thing? We're reading a piece of paper in front of us. They've now said the name James Curry. But then it gets even we're even, sorry, can we just flag the whole senior South Australian of the year for South Australia? Well, it's obviously not the senior South Australian for Victoria.

Yeah, yeah. We know where you are. you're doing. But anyway, the National Australia Day Council Chief Executive Mark, he's in the crowd and he goes, I'm just bustling in here. These guys are butchering my awards. So now this is a third person presenting Mark Fraser is his name. Hold, we need to hold for a second. It's a bit like a show when there's needs to go upstairs. Okay. All right. We're moving along as we hear this now. Apparently it's that the 2026 senior Australian of the year for South Australia is Mac Benoit.

And she said the name wrong. Is she calling it, Mac? It's Malcolm, is she calling it Mac like their best mates? Anyway, this is Mark Fraser coming on to apologise for this absolute cacophony of senior moments. Excuse us for a few moments. My name's Mark Fraser. I'm the CEO of the National Australia Council

based in Canberra. That is just a miscommunication. We had it right all the way along. I don't know what has transpired behind the scenes, but it's incorrect information. The trophy is correct. The press release is. correct. It is Malcolm Benner. I'm terribly

sorry for the embarrassment. Can you imagine being James Curry, the guy who got called so the real winner gets called up first? He's actually meant to be the winner. They say, no, no, no, sorry, it's James Curry. Because he's a senior, let's not forget. So he's slowly shuffling. He's like, I read the press release. I knew this was coming. I don't think they're shocking the seniors. I think they get the tap on the shoulder.

Hey, make sure you look nice. Do your hair. You're going to get called up. Everyone kind of knows. They go, oh, sit back down. Some bloke called James. And then James goes up and goes, holy hell. happened. He kissed his wife. He walks up there. It's like, to me. And they go, wait, wait, wait. Sorry. It's not you, James. It's back to Malcolm. It's the OG. And then Malcolm gets up there and he's made some, like, joke about, at least there's some doctors in the room or

something about having a heart attack. Oh, very good. Very good. But that is, to botch it, so many times that had the CEO come on. Like, that's worse than the Oscars. And apologize for you. Yeah. How does that happen? I don't know. Because the fact he also references a press release was written. It's like, this has been through multiple hands. I know. I know. I know. So we thought it'll be fun to do. Those two presenters, and I appreciate it. I can't find their names anywhere. They're like strip our names from all of these.

We don't want to be blamed for the senior moment. Like, if they got given the wrong envelope, even though they've read the right name, then said the wrong name. Yeah. It sounds like it was really on them. It's like someone was just puzzled in the crowd and they went, oh, did we get that wrong? Sorry, don't worry about the audience.

You plow on through. The show must go on. Someone's looking and pointing at the other guy. There's this guy. The seniors need to get to the 430 dinner special. We can't keep them any later. It is late, guys. Let's push through.

Half of them are asleep. Anyway, no one's going to know. And I just don't care. Congratulations to Malcolm, Mac, whatever we're calling him. But, like, this has completely overshadowed the other Australian of the year winners. Yeah. You know, the Australian of the young Australian. All we're talking about now is Malcolm Benoit and James Curry, who didn't even win anything.

James Curry's a real winner out of this. He didn't win anything, but he actually did win? He's going to get so many more followers out of this. 13, 1060. What was your senior's moment? What did you have? Did you forget something? Yeah.

Did you leave something behind? Maybe to the person's face. You thought you were doing X, but you know, they were. actually, whoever they might have been. I think I'm having a senior moment. You had a big weekend. That's your seniors' moment. Jess and ducco.

13, 10, 60. We're talking seniors moments. You're only 34. You can have them too. Actually, I'd like to find the youngest person who can admit to having a senior moment. We're talking about this because the 2026 senior South Australian of the year was announced over the weekend. Unfortunately, we won't play the audio again. But the presenters started by saying it's Melville.

Welcome Benoit, who is a climate change researcher. Of course. A volunteer citizen scientist, Tucko. Have you heard of anything sweeter than that? Volunteer citizen scientist. I don't know what that means. That sounds like he doesn't have a degree in science. It sounds like he just goes to the lab and he's here again.

You just play with those beakers, buddy. But he's in. He's just pouring things in? He probably does great work. You're like this. Meteorological. He's in the weather stuff. That's so sweet.

A man of my own heart. And I can confirm. nickname Mac. So Mac Benoit, he's announced, but then the presenters go, oh, sorry, no, it's wrong. It's a guy called James. James gets halfway to the stage and they go, sorry, wait. Back to the original.

It is Malcolm Benoit. Oops. The CEO has had to apologise because he's so embarrassed. Yeah. But we want to know, when have you had a senior moment? Oops, he'll slip up. We go to Blaze on 13, 1060. Good morning, Blaise.

Morning guys, how you going? Blaise, we couldn't be better. Firstly, can I ask how old you are? I am 36. All right, 36, you had a senior moment. What happened? I was on the phone to my mom on my way to work, and she asked me how her granddaughter was going.

I looked around in the back seat and realized I got halfway to work and hadn't dropped my daughter off to daycare. Oh, so she was just in the car coming with you to work? Yeah. She's just sitting in the car. Was she making any noise? No, which is why I didn't realize she was still in the car. Just forgot she was saying.

She was just peacefully quiet. That's the time you started earning a living, sweetheart. You're coming away with Mummy. You're coming with Mummy. We go to Jasmine on 13, 1060. Jasmine, when did you have a scene in this moment? Hey, guys. My partners then asked me to post an envelope for her in the mail.

So I walked to her, got the envelope, walked up the top of the driveway, put it straight in the mailbox and walk back down the driveway. No thought would I just done then. And a few days later, my partner opened the mail. box and found the same letter that needed posting. Oh, you put it in her letterbox. I'm sorry, I was having a senior moment. I was like, yeah,

that's how it works. I put it in her own letter box. I come home from work and they're both laughing. I said, what are we laughing about me, guys? And they said, so, Jasmine, did you post that letter? I said, yeah, I put it in the mailbox and, yeah, in that moment I've realised what I'd done.

Yeah, that's not how Australia Post works. You know what, though? Posting a letter's hard. It was the last time you did it. I don't even know if I know how. What are you right in the front and the back? I was going to say I've posted a letter. Well, I don't post letters. I actually don't think I've ever posted a letter. How many stamps?

How many stamps had the nan put on the envelope? What do you roll in with these days? Honestly, I could not remember what I was even doing that day. Like, you know, you're asking the road version. Jess and Ducko. So, obviously, had the old Killin' Us to be on Friday. Everything is fine. For those of asking, clean column.

Squeaky clean. Squeaky clean. My father, very concerned. You had blood in your stool. Yeah, no, none of that. I was just getting a check just for a piece of mind slash, you know, you know what? We always talk about me, IBS on this show, me a Babs. It's no laughing matter.

No, no. So now I've got to check out. It's all fine, squeaky, clean, good times. I love that. But the process, right? So you, I was covering it all last week. You start on, you one day of like no seeds and nuts or something. And then the next day it's whites only.

So white foods, you're on the white diet, a lot of white bread. A lot of boil chicken. A lot of chicken. All that sort of gear. And then the day after that, it's liquids only. until you can get your colonoscopy. So it's kind of a Russian roulette and pending on importance of the case

as to when you get seen by the doctor. She starts, or my doctor, for this instance, she started at 7am. Okay, that was when her first case was, all the way up until 3.30 in the afternoon. And how long does it take? They give half an hour time slots for the colonoscis. They literally just churn and burn.

She's still on 25 but holes in a day. Literally what I wanted to ask her when she came out, I was like, how many butts are you seen today? Yeah. How many butts have been inside today? Because, like, you know, we often question podiatrists. You know, why have you dedicated yourself to the foot? Yeah.

The gastroenterologist also deserve the question. Found out she wanted to do radio, my gastroologist. She said she wanted to get into radio initially, but she couldn't get in. Did you tell her your leave? Does she want a demo? Did she want to jump in? What do you reckon? She's in gastro.

This is here. God, I mean, we already talk about a lot of butt stuff. Imagine with a former gastroenterologist. I don't know if she'd have as much. fun. Oh, okay. You've got to have a sense of humour if you've dedicated your life to the do. I said what, what in the bus.

She was very good, though. This is my answer. This is what I do. This is what I come out to. So anyway, I couldn't eat food. This is a big one that I wanted to pack you. I couldn't eat food from Wednesday night. I had dinner 7pm.

And I didn't get let in to go do mine scope until 1.15 p.m. On Friday. So Thursday, no food. No food. And all the way. Day Friday. And I couldn't eat until 4 p.m. How did you sleep the Thursday?

Because not only are you starving, but that's when you started the drinks, right? There's not much sleep. The leaky juice. So you get this juice. And can I just say, everyone said it tastes so bad. The juice wasn't that bad. It just tastes like sour lemonade. Like, and I like sour.

I like lemonade. People are saying it is the most foul. Yeah, it really. It wasn't. It wasn't that gross, the actual taste of it. Like, I didn't mind it too much, which could say a lot about me. So you have one at 3pm and you sort of, you know, rumbles a bit. And you have another one at 6pm.

Okay. And then all of a sudden. sudden buy that. What's in you to flash? You haven't eaten for bloody 36 hours. Yeah, a couple of days of backlog, I presume. I lost three and a half kilos in just releasing. And Shagga actually messaged me. Yeah, beforehand and after, I lost three and a half kilos. Shagg actually messaged me and it was a round of time things were kicking off. And like, honestly, my stomach, we were just, it's like, you just hear it go and you like, oh my God, what is that about? You got to the bathroom and it's just unpleasant from, I reckon,

And 8 p.m. that night until 1 a.m. How? I was just on and off the toilet. Are you farting as well? No, if you do that, you... Because you're scared. So the first time I actually did and then came out. And I was like, oh, no!

So like, you actually need... You can't... Morgan's changing flow at the time and I'll just lie down. I'll do you too. So actually a rice cooker, they all give me their tips because lots of rice cookers were replying to my stories playing along. They're like, get the flushable wipes. There you go.

You had those. I saw them in your kit. Thank God. How did you go with the flusable wipes? Because we talked about those the other week. Yeah. Very good. That were very good.

Nice on the... And like, somebody else was like, don't wipe. Make sure you just like tap because like... Oh, Pat. It's just... Everything is just in flame. Like a carpet stain. Oh my God.

And it's just, it's a sting central. Oh, it would be. It's so unpleasant. And I saw you guys going out to dinner on the Thursday night. And I was just like on the toilet over. Oh, no, I think I texted it to you didn't. Yeah, yeah. We did toast to your butthole.

Yeah, yeah. I thought you would get the positive vibes. I did feel it. It was nice. We got free champagne on arrival. It was very nice. And we toasted. Must be nice.

To Duckers. To my anus. Anyway, the funniest thing was going in the next day. So you're going, sure enough, the nurse was like, come on this way, Ducker. She's like, you've done with breaking people's hearts this week because you're leaving. I was like, oh, yeah. Well, she's like, I'm going to a rough on you. You've hurt me.

A little bit. And then, and then she was lovely. But then you go into the waiting room and you're in there in a robe. You got the hospital gown and you got a little hospital head thing in the socks. I got the hospital gown, open in the back. And you're naked because that's what's happening. And you go into this waiting room. And I walk in the dress.

room. She's like, there's a few people before you walk in. There's 10 people seeing various doctors all getting colonoscopies. All in the waiting room in their robes. They're all sitting there in their robes, sitting there looking depressed and hungry is all hell. Everyone's starving. And no one's got any energy and then the doctor will come out and be like,

Mrs. Johnson, and like she'll get up and like hobble in. Yeah, just a flash of her ass as she walks into her appointment. Yeah, totally. It was me and like all the oldies and then you finish the you get, you know, you come out from the drug. My exam, I think, took eight minutes. Gee, so like four and a half, five days of prep for seven minutes.

Yep, I know. That was the best seven minutes of my life. I was like, can I be awake? Nah, damn, you're going to put me down, eh? Anyway, I wake up. So it's immediate all clear. Yeah. Like, it looked beautiful.

Yeah, wake up and they give you a sandwich and it's the best sandwich ever. Everyone always says that and you see everyone else waking up. But all the people in their like 70s were like just looking like they'd been shell shot. Like they'd been on a five-day bender. They're getting flashbacks. I'm just popped right up. I'm like, oh, can I have a sandwich and get out of here? Anyway, all clear, all fine.

Wonderful. Would recommend. Review five-star. Would recommend a probe. Yes and Ducko. Welcome to a glorious Monday. Miss any of the show. Grab it on the podcast.

I'll review your podcast because we are just about done here, team. You may have missed us. I'm going to say interrogating. Yeah. The newest mayonnaise ambassador. His name is Kaelin Ponger. You'll know him as an NRL superstar. A Dally M winner.

Mm-hmm. He is now the face of Hellman's mayonnaise. They've partnered with a fashion designer and come up with a bow tie. Bizarre. So you can smuggle mayonnaise in. Now, I'm quite offended that I have not been asked to be a mayonnaise ambassador. Well, you would have been the perfect fit, the perfect candidate for it. I genuinely.

You go into the fridge and middle of the line, suck on to Maya. My brother constantly brings that up. Now, it wasn't Hellman's. My day, it was praised, but that's fine. Same thing. So we gave Kalan the third degree. You can hear it in the podcast, but one of our brilliant rice cookers ducco. Oh, yeah?

She wasn't happy either. She goes, you're Mrs Mayo. She said, yes, I am. She's just created an image. I've sent it to you. I'm assuming she's done this on AI or one of the grocks. Probably. One of the grocks.

What are you drinking? Oh, it's mayo on the head. It's a mayonnaise apparel. It's elevate every moment. I see. That's done with Gemini, which is Google's AI. The little star in the corner, that's Google. Oh, well, there you go.

So she's made me Mrs. Mayo. God, our rice cookers. Well, that's a whole egg mayo. That's the best kind of mayo. Yeah. This is what Helmans could have. What are you drinking? Is that an April?

No, this is a rosé. This is a campaign shoot for a food month. She's obviously pulled this photo. Oh, that's good. You're Mrs. Mayo. You know what she should have done. She should have made me the little bottle of mayo on your head. Oh, I like that.

You know, then I could have, anyway, go for, walk on that, okay? Work on that. Yeah, yeah. And Helmans, if you're listening, there's an opportunity here. Absolutely. Jess and Duck are on borders, mayonnaise and that's the best of it. You'd be cheaper than the current. I surely would be cheaper than KP.

Didn't he come on and rattle off stats. Didn't know what he was talking about. Loves Mayne. Loves Mayer. Because all healthy athletes loves Mayer. Second most smuggled condiment, allegedly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd like to see that too, babe.

Hey, a bit of a great show, though. If you've missed it, grab the podcast. We've had some fun. Oh, so much fun. From colonoscopies to whales to baby names. To me learning who Nathan Lyon is. Gary. Gary the goat.

Yep. Bowling, Nathan. Different to Gary Lyon. The AFL. In this last conversation, we've covered three different sporting codes. Geez, we're good. Don't put us in a box. Don't put us in a box.

You're just excited for the Ashes this Friday, aren't you? Yep, that's cricket. Yep. Marnas. Let me chat to Howie last week. We did. I actually would like to listen to his podcast. I won't listen to The Ashes episodes.

No, fair. But I think there are other ones I'd find interesting. Plenty. So once you're done with us, listen to Howie's. Yeah, I'll just stay with us. Yeah, just listen to our back catalog. There's plenty of JD back. Because, hey, look, man, I'll bring the tone down.

What are you going to do? 24 more shows to get the duck home. Today was our 25th. Geez, we're on the countdown, are we? The countdown to the end of an era. J.D. will be no more. Unless I got a new co-host whose name starts with Dave.

I imagine you get Derek. Jess and Derek. Jess and Drew. Jess and David. Jess and Duncan. Come on, Babs. Have a crack. Play.

Jess and Dee. Have we done, Dave? Oh, God, damn it. Jess and David. I did, Dave. Were you listening? Come on. Jess and Dirk.

Jess and Denny. Danny. Will you get another bird naming guy? Oh, God. Sparrow. Jess and Ibers? Maybe Sam Sparrow. He liked a demo.

Sure. We'll get him on for a demo. Jess in the Ibis. Should that be a prerequisite? Yeah. I'll even take an animal base. Jess and the crow. Jess and the crow.

Yep. I don't hate that. Whoever it is, I'll just start calling them the phone. How many times do you reckon you'll call new me, me? I think a lot. I think a lot. To bring the rice cookers in, I have had one audition, and the guy did say, oh, it's Justin Ducko.

I mean, it's Jessen. Insert his own name. So it's going to be hard to shake. It's a bolted on brand. It is. It's going to be very weird. Good morning to that guy, if you're listening. Thanks for saying my name.

Hey, we're out of here. We are back tomorrow, though. So, plenty of fun time in our lives. The last 24 shows. Tomorrow is Tuesday. 24. Crazy, isn't it? I know.

Don't get emotional. Come on. We've got so well. Tomorrow's Tuesday. We've got Alphox for 10K. More chances at Oprah tickets. What else we have? Shall I go.

The blog. The blog will be here. You've got some audio from your dad. Then we'll go through. Tease us some blog stuff, Bats. What do you got? Don't know. Geez, the team's cooking.

24 shows and we have phoned it in. What are you? You good today? You're not listening. brainstorm on a Monday. You get drunk on the weekend? What did you get up to? No, I didn't actually.

Okay. No excuse. I believe you. Anyway, anything else else want to add? No, we'll see you tomorrow. See tomorrow. Bye-bye. Nathan Lyne, Gary.

Gary the goat. His name's Nathan. Yeah, but Gary the goat, because he's the goat. Who's Gary, though? Nathan Lyon, Gary the goat. Why are they called him Gary? Because he's the goat. Jess and Ducko.

That was the Jess and Ducko podcast. The new macho range is here at McCaffee. Thank you.