Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Fraturday

Episode Date: September 24, 2025

Did a French radio station cover the news of Jess' parents evacuating a hotel? We ask what fell on you and hear how Duckos sister became a bridezillar!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Monopoly at Maccas is back. Play only in the app. Ends October 14. For full terms, visit McDonald's.com.com. This is the Jess and Ducco podcast. Time to the podcast. Everyone's here. You got Jess having a blast.

Shagga, doing what he does with his big, big pain. Bats is here, too, with a dirty, dirty spleen. And what are you doing? Ducco. He's four foot eight. And life is great. Punch you in the groin because life is great. Remember there's AI themes that we have made last year?

Oh, that would never get off the ground. There's a copyright issue. That's right. Do you know what does pop in my head every now and then? I don't know if it's a testament to the efficacy of AI. Fly first class forever. Rest easy, Jed. The funeral song, you guys.

I was going to say you guys wrote. Well, you prompted. Jazz and nine girls, first class, That was, that was, that was, that pops into my head sometimes. It was fun to put you down. It was into my head sometimes from our show opener, Jess. Just that. We're not always on your mind.

I always get the babs, babs, jazz, yes. Sometimes it's randomly, I'll be cooking, dinner, yeah. Oh, that's wonderful. Sometimes it's randomly, I'll be cooking dinner. It is funny what permeates. Yeah, it does. It was the Pope always pops into the mine. It wasn't a, Bauden.

Braden. We had a Brandon on the other day. I got so excited, then remembered, oh, it wasn't Brandon. It was Briden. So that was upsetting. Any show where a dump is involved, which is where Ducco has to basically take us out of the future and put us back into life. Well, I pissed on yours the other day for a thousand bucks. So, I mean, it only was fair.

We didn't do it. It was off. It was an off air. Yeah, yeah. Shy guy, stop ruining it. It was filled it. No, I don't know about it. It didn't actually happen.

Between that and the smart. That was in the podcast, wasn't it? I forget what the conversation. I think we talked about what you have to pay for someone to pee on you because we're talking about Pony Blue and then... Oh, that's right. For a thousand. You're being obsessed with Bonnie Blue.

So smart, Babs. That's right. For a thousand, no, she's a millionaire. And you said she slept with a thousand dollars. We were trying to work out the maths. Yeah. So Duck and I obviously, you know, a thousand bucks here. Oh, no.

No, no. That's a just penetration. That's a deep cut Bonnie reference. Yeah, that's another video that I'm unaware of. Well, anyway, it was a great try. I did have to dump today. We had a loose Bronco supporter caller play Alphi since he's 30 who sucked at the game. It was fantastic.

But do you love, I've just popped a little video on Jess and Ducko's story. There is a bit where he clear as day says, I'll back myself in. I reckon I'm going to go all the way. That's a real Bronx support. Just fantastic. He loves Reese Rolls. Also thought I was asking him how good he is as a supporter when he's in the crowd, which is never a question that's ever been asked ever.

So funny. So, so funny. You'll hear that in the show. You'll hear a lot of good times. I've got the unfortunate job. they of driving up to Byron. Do you need to chuff off? Well, pretty well, so normally the drive is about six, six and a half hours. I think, what is it? About six and a half hours.

Have you done this drive with Florence before? Yeah, we've done to Brisbane with Flo. Yes. But we did, we stopped off, I had to stop three times. She was also a lot younger. Yeah, a bit more sleepy. Yeah, a bit more sleepy. Whereas now she's going to be a bit more awake.

Like, she's going to wake up from her nap and we're getting straight in the car and going. Oh, God. It's almost like, you want a time that to start the nap, but obviously the schedule that you're on. So she's going to be awake for two hours and then we have to stop. Have you entered Wiggles, Quokers, teeny, tiny giants? None of that yet. She still just likes Kendrick and Rufus. Fantastic.

Sit down. Yeah, shut up. What, wah, wah, wah, yeah, yeah. They're not laggers. Yeah, yeah, she bops to Kendra. Well, that's good because on a long journey having to listen to that sort of stuff on repeat. I'm actually all right with it, but Angus can't even do it for about 20 minutes. I've got a few podcasts.

I'll see how that goes. Okay. I don't know if that'll land. Yeah. Maybe with extra voices, she might actually find that. interesting. She's not taking it in. The problem is with the car,

she just associated it to with sleep. So she'll be up and then she'll just fall. She'll just conk out and she'll sleep too much. And then Morgan will have a bloody connipion that she's over sleeping and I'd have a word to Morgan. I'm like, look, the routine with her is going to go out the friggin' window. For the next five days, yes.

Yeah, yeah. Like, we're going to just have, like, it is what it is. Like, when you stop off for a pie, one of you just goes out by as the pies come back in the car. Yeah, it's just, even like the day after the wedding is the AFL grand final day. It starts at 2.30. It probably ends at like 530. Is there TV's at the recovery?

Like wherever you're at the pub. But her nap is at like four. And Morgan's like, we're going to take her home for a nap. I was like, whew. You can. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly what I said. I don't want to.

I'm like, it does become, and it's unfortunate that kids don't bring you closer together. They actually divide you more because you go, no, I don't want to do that. You do? Well, then you do it. Do you know what I mean? Like, obviously you're a team. Yeah, yeah. But at the end of the day, I'm the sport guy.

We don't both have to suffer, you know? I'm a sport guy. So if I want to watch the Lions on Saturday and the Bronx on Sunday, like this just falls into a category that I'll get the next one. And that's what it is. Compromise. Exactly the lunch we went to with some of Angus's close mates. I went, well, you go early.

I'll wait until she wakes up. Bring her later. Yeah. It's compromise. Compromise. Oh, they'll have to take two cars. Well, that's the sacrifice you have to make. She had my sister's hands a fortnight of guide.

Flo. Then the weekend just gone on. Our friend was in town from Sydney. They went to a nice, bougie dinner. And I stayed at home with a child. There you go. I just stayed at home watching Bonnie Blue dockos. You know what I mean?

I don't want to do it, but compromise. But, God, you need to learn about business skills and that's the person. You look at them for. Shai guy came over. We cracked a bottle. Imagine me and Shiger hanging out on a Saturday night. What is your beverage of choice when you guys get together and you're watching the Bonnie Blue? And then subsequently, what meal?

Oh, yeah. Best accompanies that sort of view. We went a bit bushy and got a few cock-sucking cowboys. Well, again, appropriate. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then the meal you chose Shagai, which was interesting. Tacos. Oh, of course it was tacos.

Extra cheese. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We were eating Tark, watching Tark, baby. Pussy, pussy. Pussy, man, I get that. That's how you get ducco from out under the car. Pussy, pussy, pussie, puss, puss, puss, me. You need you want to add, Babs?

Give us your best. If you were trying to coax a cat. Oh, you know, you're trying to coax me out. I'm under, okay, I'm under the car. You're under the car. He's been startled. Yeah, how do you go there? Oh, stop touching me.

How do you coax him out from under the car? Hang on, ready? Doon. Meal. Oh, Baz is the car. She's run you over there. Cat ducco? That was...

You're just dead. Jesus. You flattened him. I hate this so much. What are you doing? I mean, I appreciate your attempted improvisation. Yeah. I don't like cats.

Sorry. Clearly. You just ran him over. You just killed me. That's a flat cat. That went really dark. Sorry. No, I know what Babs are doing if she was trying to get me out from somewhere.

Shy Guy and I had a pussy pussy, pussy. And these bats are turning the engine on. Yeah, come on. Stay there, pussy, pussy pussy, pussy. Here I come. Shiger was shaking the box of. whiskers to get me out. Yeah.

And you were just there just trying to stop on me. I don't know. I don't like that. Doesn't like the pooh. Well, that's a learning, daco. Never hide under a car. I'm hoping Babs won't run you over. You ever had a love affair of women at all Babs?

You ever gone that way? No. Pussy, pussy, pussy. Hang out with me a bit more. It'll catch on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, when are you meeting up with your girlfriend? Oh, which one?

Bro, there's like three new women in my life. The one that you... I had lunch with my Brow lady. Oh, yeah. So I messaged her. She did that charity thing. She raised heaps of money.

So now we're going to go out for celebratory cocktails. Be careful. Is Angus to be like, should I be there? Yeah. It's like, get out there. He feels so, this is the beauty of a husband who works so freaking much. He's got so much guilt. He's like, yeah, you go, do whatever you want to do.

No, no, I don't mean, how you're going. I mean, you with this girl. Like, if you two, like, tongue punch it up up. He hasn't, he hasn't said anything. Okay. He's such a close. his book, he won't tell me what his fantasy is. This might be one.

He's trying to encourage. Who's to say? He won't tell me. Yeah, this could be his fantasy. Can't even get him to wear freaking glasses, pretend to be a sexy librarian, you know? So maybe this is the one. This could be it. He's like, yes, he is.

Take the family credit card. Have a good time. Oh, the family credit card. Who's to say? Okay. Anyway, don't worry. You'll be the first one to know. I look forward to that.

I look forward to that. I look forward to that, indeed. It's the family credit card, isn't that? It's not like him giving you your car. Yeah, it's just like, but, you know, I've got my own money as well. So he's saying, you don't have to use your own money. Use the family. Right, I see.

That's what I'm saying. At what point in, he doesn't realize I use the family one for everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that's the one loaded on my phone. At what point into your relationship do you share? I thought so, yeah. We've been shared down. But how long into?

Oh, we did it before we were even engaged. Or maybe we were just engaged and we did it. So I've been, we've been, I don't have any of my own money. Right. So you get paid into the family pool. I get paid into one. bank account which goes for like our mortgage, etc. And then her money comes into the

other one, which is play money and, you know, MCE Vensel comes in there. Interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So my money comes into my own. But then I have a like fortnightly contribution to the family account. So mine is mine and I give, we feed the pool. Yeah, yeah. But we have our own.

No, we're, yeah, we're all linked. You're all linked. Yeah, yeah. But yes, I'm trying to think when that would have even happened. I guess it was a conversant, I reckon it was the first time we traveled and it became, do we get a joint credit card for these sort of big expenses. Yeah. So that's why that pool was created in my head.

I just assume once you get a mortgage, that's when you would pull in my head. Dracking will ever go all pooled? No. No? And I want that for him too. I don't want to ever have to question or be questioned what I spend my money on. That's my. That's my issue.

It's my responsibility. And obviously every couple's different, but no, that's mine. Yeah. And this is the issue. Our tax is linked, mortgage, link. The big things are linked. Yeah. But my little egg.

That's my little egg. To do what you want. That's right. Yeah. Well, her little is pretty little and mine's rather big, so she gets a good egg. You know what I mean? Who? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And that's another, that's another factor there, isn't it? No, honestly, it doesn't bother me at all. No, but that's the thing. Some people could, it could be, but that's the healthiness of your relationship. Yeah, I like us all being linked. Like, because it's like we're going to. I like the idea of that too. Yeah, we're going to pay, like, it's our mortgage, it's our electricity, whatever may be.

So it's like, you know, whether she's going to. has a $400 dinner one weekend and I don't, then I do it next, or I go to a bus, like some weekends are busy than others or whatever. But for the most part, there's no, there's no real issues. We have similar spending habits. Say, again, another important factor. You see, like, finances, I'm pretty, this got real deep, real fast. I didn't even, I was just doing in the curious.

No, no, no, and that's a fair question. Finances, I think, is the number one thing couples will fight over or will break down relationships. So you need to be aligned, however it does look. And it works for you. Exactly. Yeah, exactly. We don't shop too much.

We have similar spending, I think, so that helps. Yeah, absolutely, it would. Because can you imagine, like, she's coming home to another parcel with Ducko's name, another parcel. Oh, and that still happens, but it's like things we need, you know? Things we need, yeah, yeah, okay. And then with a kid, obviously, that's another element, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Who's paying for what, or who has to come from. So how does that work? So anything for her comes again from the pool. Right, right, right, right. Which has the accompanying cards. Yeah, exactly. So anything is on the pool. So he's got a full separate bank account that you don't,

know what comes in and out of. No, can't see it. That's his. And I've got mine. Exactly. And then, to be honest, I've got even another one because my dad does some funny business with whatever, my little nest egg. Laundering.

I want that off the record. Strip that from the record. Kaman Island, Kretika. Jess and Ducco in the morning. Stop what you're doing and listen. You know I got that shit that you like. There's only one show to wake up with you. I'm not that easy to tame.

Yes. I put something in my mouth the other day that have not been in there for a long time. I ain't got to explain. Don't eat your, don't eat your sister's poo. Stop pooing on the deck. I got him going insane. Like when you buy a phandrant Thailand. Can you only get it in a bag? Fast. Naprod sausages.

Fuck yeah, talk it. This is Jess and Taco. Yes, it is. Right on 60 o'clock. Hey, it's that halfway mark, Tim. It's Wednesday, baby. It's Wednesday, baby. Oh, yeah. Have a big week for your family. We touched on it yesterday. The Royal Wedding is upon us too. The Royal Wedding, your little sister. Oh, yes.

Getting married on Friday. Yeah, already sent a few texts. A bit windy. Hope the wind doesn't save for my wedding. Guys, bring a jumper. We're going to Byron, sweetie. We'll be right. We'll be fine.

I don't know if she's factored that into her runchay, Ducko. Wind. It's probably going to slow things down the wind. I've got a six and a half hour drive today, but with a child that's probably going to take us eight. Yep. To get in there tonight. And mum's like, I've got some dinner guests coming over tonight as well.

God, we're going to be rolling in hot, I don't know if I'm going to be making small talk. I'm doing my radio show from the living room in Byron tomorrow. I'm going to set that up while we get our daughter in. I'm going to need to go to bed at a decent hour, mum, so you just keep that pin noir to a minimum. I'm on the clock. I'm on the clock from tonight, guys.

So say goodbye to me. Oh, it's exciting. It is exciting. Yes. We're looking forward to it. Big family wedding. So yes, I chew off after the show today. Yep, so you'll do it.

Remote tomorrow. Yeah. And then it's just me and Shagga and Babs on Friday. Oh, hey, it'll be fun. Yeah, it'll be. Shagas got some surprises for you. Do you remember the last bit of feedback he got when you were away? Oh, speak.

Speak up. Smile. Yeah, smile. I don't know what that means. Yeah, yeah. Smile on your voice. You can hear it through the big stick if you are. All right, okay, okay, let's test it.

I want you to not smile and speak. All right, should we close our eyes? Yeah, yeah, okay. Just go normal, shy guy. Good morning, everyone. Now put a smile in your voice. Good morning, everyone. There's an inflection.

You can't work for three hours like that. Well, I can. What do you think he and I do? But you guys are up anyway What I'm saying. Yeah, yeah. Anyway. Well, you've got 48 hours.

You don't know we need to sit like a Cheshire cat with a big smile on your face. But a little bit of joy. Just a bit of joy. Just a bit of joy. That's what we're employed to do, shy guy. I love what you do, mate. I love who you do it with. Yeah.

Do you know, I heard a fantastic philosophy. Oh. Don't find a job you love, but love your job. You know? It's all about your attitude. Hang on. Yeah, hang on a minute. That needs a...

Wait, did I get it right? Don't find a job you love. I found a job you love. Job your love. Don't, no, is it... Don't love your job. The end of it was, job your love.

So like whatever your passion is, make a job out of that. But the phrase job, your love, she's copying a lot of shit, this woman online. Like Babs always says, don't live to work, work to live.

Work to live. Work to live. Yes. Just go get your salary. Yeah. Put in some good time. Got your pay ticket, you know? And then use that to fuel the extra.

Yeah. According to career buddy.com. Yes. Don't love your job, job your love. That is the popular phrase concept. It encourages people to make their passion or true interest in their livelihood. Stuff, I want to be a painter. I'm going out on a limb.

Don't make those things work for you. What if the job you love pays nothing? You might need to side hustle for money Anyway, see, when you don't have a smile He was smiling when he said that, just saying you can tell You can tell And he's such a poo-pooer He's going, oh, you can't do that

You can't. If you love what you do That's it, yeah, yeah That's why when he's sending emails He's just smiling And he talks on air and he just frowned He's much better on an email But come Friday you'll be sitting over there

I'm going to need a little smile Actually, you were in trouble in my household last night, Shagai. Because I said to my wife, I said, hey, we've got to watch the Bonnie Blue documentary. Shire Guy's watched it, he's recommended it. She can't blame that on me. Shagai said she's really good. She's an amazing businesswoman. She's a clever.

And Morgan's like, who's Bonnie Blue? So I just showed her a few little clips. I just said, ah, you know, this chick, the Thousand Guy Chick. And she's like, what? We are not watching that. You know, Bonnie Blue, the pay bars. She'd heard, had she heard of it once. She'd never heard of it.

Never heard it. Wow. To be honest, to be fair, Morgan was pregnant during her peak and everything. I mean, Morgan doesn't check social media that much of it. And when she does, she just serves me the same memes about new parents. I'm like, I know, honey, I've seen iterations of that now 14 times. Thank you so much. Yeah, yeah. So you're not allowed to watch it?

Well, actually, we didn't. It doesn't mean we won't, you know? It's just hard when we've only got like an hour to be able to watch something. Do you take turns driving when you do big shifts in the car? None of you all me today. It's all you're going to say, when she takes over, can you just have a little... Oh, yeah, put a ponnyville in the back. Me and Flo in the back seat.

Get the iPad out? She's actually sitting in the back for the first time with the baby with Flo. because Flo is now going to be a wait for a lot more of this car trip. The last one we did, she was only three months old. That's usually my freaking job. So she's going to sit in the back while I'd drive. I'd much rather drive. I'm going.

Prepare yourself, Drucker. You're going to see a side of your wife. You've probably never seen. Yeah, I know. The silliness, the ridiculousness, what you have to pull at your bum to keep these ones entertaining the back. God. Yeah, I know.

It's not fun. I know. I can't wait for this six hours. Hell of a day. What, you know what's going to make it better? A great show with my pals. Well, here we go. So shy guys.

That's a lot to put a smile in your voice about. Yeah. Smile. He's just smiling on Mike doing nothing. And then I gave you a thumbs up. Cool, man. Yeah, cool. But also, let's keep thinking about the rice cookers out there who can't see you.

Yep. Big show. Alpha bucks, your chance at $10,000. Of course, as always. Shire Guy dips on the show today. Promise he'll be smiling for that. Oh, my God. More chances of the call fame, and you have plenty of chances to get involved today

to win yourself NRL Finals tickets plus accommodation. We had some unbelievable contributions yesterday, so you need to put your hands. Hat in the ring today. Yep. But I'm next, Ducko. I hope it is early enough. I look forward to this. I need to vent.

Yep. About my in-laws. Yes. Nothing's better. Because you know they're local. Yeah, so I've got to be very careful. Jess and Duckow.

Jess and Ducko. I take back what I said. I don't want to talk about my in-laws. I just want to talk about two people. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just two randoms. Two wonderful human beings.

Great humans. Love them. Love them for what they do. do. Who are really upsetting me and aggravating me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just these two people, random people. Yeah. We're very lucky to have these two people.

Help us out. Yes. A couple times a week with our small girl. Yeah. And yesterday, Ducco, they were on shift. And when they are on shift, it doesn't matter what I'm doing or what I'm not doing. I could have nothing planned, but I will avoid going home. Yeah, you go and get lunches out.

I will find something to do. You know what I did yesterday? What did you do? I had packed my laptop, very smart. I thought I've got a couple of ceremonies to write for some weddings in October that I'm celebrant for. Because it was blowing a gale, couldn't really sit anywhere for very long without, you know, getting a bit too cold or a bit too breezy. I sat in my car at the front of our apartment building. I could have probably gone now that I think about it to a library or another public.

That is apparent appreciating just alone, silence, peace and quiet. Because I actually find I don't want to take up real estate at cafes because it's lunchtime. Like, yeah, I could eat, but then what am I sitting there for two hours? I feel guilty about doing that. You know, it's that cliche thing in Hollywood movies or writers just sitting in a cafe. I feel bad. Yeah. So.

I can never go to a cafe just over my laptop and just start working. I'm just not that kind of person. I've tried. I'm too distracted by people around me. There's things going on. I don't know because I'm not tech savvy. I might need shy guys. Tech tips.

I don't know how to connect my headphones to my headphones to my. to my laptop like blue two so I don't so I can't block out people and then my Caesar salad comes and I'm getting bloody Caesar dressing on my laptop because I try and shovel it in whilst working with one hand it's too hard yeah it's too much going so I find myself just sitting in my car anyway just watching the clock basically going all right I know they need to leave at three or whatever yeah I eventually go up and there is one one request we have please follow the schedule when it comes to naps. Routine.

Because you know we're having big issues with sleep, okay? So I'd actually said to my husband in the morning, hey, can you make sure, because we're trying new things, are they across it, make sure they are across it. Yeah, that's his job. It's his parents. It's his job. I feel, even though I've been in the family for like eight years,

I don't, you know, I'm gutless. I can't tell them what to do. Even if it is, hey, this is what we're, I can't. I just feel wrong telling these people, strangers, how to be and how to, how to, grand. parent. So he said, yeah, yeah, no worries. They know the schedule.

They know when to nap and they know how to do it. Okay. I come back at three. She's bouncing off the walls. And I was like, this is not a kid. I can tell the bloodshot eyes, the bags. She has not slept. So my, I do get a little bit upset, but I also understand it's hard.

It's not easy to just click your fingers and make her go to sleep. So I'm already pissed off. But then I go to the kitchen and I hit the roof. they leave they do what Angus does and I've bitched about it before the sink filled with the yuck sink water when they've washed up and they don't pull the plug

so they're there apologising they couldn't get her down for a nap and all I'm thinking is I don't give you shit about the nap now unplug the sand The dirty sink water Oh my God So Angus eventually comes home

And I'm like oh they couldn't get her down for a nap He starts you know trying to apologise I don't actually care about that Tell them to unplug the He goes in the grand scheme of things. Is that really the worst crime? I'm like, yes, it is. Yes, it is.

It just bugs you. Yeah. Talk about perspective. I went on to give a crap about the routine when the disgusting sink water is left in the sink. So did you just leave it? You didn't touch the sink water? I don't touch the sink water. I'm not putting my hand in that.

It's like putting my hand into a deep lagoon. You can't see the bottom of. Food scraps in a sink plug hole. Yeah, well, it's poo in front of each other. That's fine. That's fine. That's fine. I leave the door open when my in-laws are home.

Hey, you guys want to come and it's a party. But unplug the setting. Jess and Ducco. Childcare's wonderful place, obviously. But I know you had a run in with your child care a while ago about trying to get the artwork. Bro, great memory. That was her first day at a daycare where they, she came home with a piece of art. But I compared it to some pictures I'd received during the day of the art in progress.

Side by side, I went. It's different. She's giving us the wrong piece of art. I've got some other brats, freaking finger painting. I want my brats. Hang on, and you went to full investigation to try and get your artwork back. I'm zooming in. You're calling them?

I called old mate from NCIS. What's his name? Jethro. Is he Jethro? Is he Jethro? I don't know. Well, I know a Stabler for more in order. Oh, we love.

I should have got Stabler and Benson. Yeah, Benson. I think I called the wrong guy. Yeah, yeah. Stabler and Benson, they had sex here. Are they a thing? Oh, no, they're just friends. It's a great question.

Some of Google that. No, I think Stabler. Have he had a married spot line? Google it's Stabler and Benson. He's still looking up who Jethro is. Do they sleep together in law and order? No. I reckon you're reading some fanfic, you know?

Maybe, geez, I got confused. Maybe it's what I wanted. Maybe it's what I always wanted. N-C-I-S special agent, Leroy, Jethro Gibbs. There you go. We're learning a lot about the crime shows. And you know what's got nothing to know what I'm about to talk about. I'm glad we went on this journey to go.

We've learned. Hey, there's a childcare in Queensland. It's a childcare centre holding children's artwork at ransom unless parents cop up a $2,200 donation to keep the childcare alive. Okay, now I feel like this is appropriate to have brought up the cops. Yeah, yeah. Your Benson and your staplers and your jet throws,

we need to get some authorities involved. Craigsley, kindergarten and preschool, which is in Chermside up in Brisbane's north, sent an email home to parents demanding thousands of dollars in return for their children's art portfolio over the years to help pay for the kindi debts. Apparently, this centre's more than $4,600 in the red last financial year. Not for profit.

Supposedly, I've got volunteers. However, a mum allegedly reported to police for stealing the artwork when she went in because she thought, I'm not paying for my own kids' finger painting. I already paid them to come here. I don't want to disrespect anyone else's. I'll talk about my own. They're all that. They're all bad.

Who's going to pay a port? I want my daughter's portfolio of finger painting and macaroni art? Like, I wanted that first one because it was the first one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But everything she brought home since, I'm like. Trash. You know she doesn't have. it. She doesn't have it. I don't think of my daughter's. Can you tell when you're a kid. She's no

Frida Carlo, let's put it that way. Like can you tell when your kid does something? Here you go and you're like, thanks. And you just know it's bad. It's not even that it's bad, Ducco. It's just nothing. It's a scribble. Yeah. It's an interpretation of daddy. And you're like, what is that? I literally say to her, can you draw Daddy? And she does a line. Penes. I mean, I know he's got a lot. Good interpretation. Yeah, yeah. Because I know he's got a long head. He's got a few more features than just a line. That's daddy. She, if it was shy guy, perfect, drawing.

A line. Maybe she misunderstood. I'll bring it in for you shy guy. She thinks shy guy's daddy. Hang it up on my desk. She thinks the shy lord is daddy. Mate, she points at anyone on the TV. Daddy?

I was like, nope, that's Idris Elbaugh, but sure. Could be, though. In another life. Anyway, apparently they've asked all these parents to donate to pick up the portfolio. They need money and they need money stat. You can't be holding art ransom. No. And then apparently right before the holidays,

The school holiday's up there. The centre closed. They blacked out their windows. They took all the artwork with them. They've bailed on it. What? Yeah, yeah. Completely suss. The police are investigating in it.

The premiere came out on national TV on Tuesday and described the centre's request as a desperate attempt of emotional blackmail. It is. It is extortion. Yeah. They're basically trying to say, you want your beautiful kids finger painting.

Great memento of their time. You need to pass money. And if you want the whole thing a portfolio. Thousands of dollars. Yeah. This actually wreaks now that they've shut up shop and fled. Maybe one of those kids did have some like prodigy talent And they're like, we could probably make money of this

And have now legged it. You reckon we'll see it like on the black market somewhere. You know, some kids are actually amazing. Mozart wrote Twinkle, Twinkle and he was like four. Did he? Yeah, unbelievable. So maybe there's a kid at this daycare that they went. At four?

I'm pretty sure it was at four. Gurgle it! Mozart! What age was Mozart when he composed Twinkle, Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star? Pretty sure. mild prodigy that guy. I mean, set, you know, he's genius. But also, at four, finger paint or something, mate. Bote's not.

It didn't write it. Was it Beethoven? Uh, uh, Babs. It was one of the big ones. A biggie. He didn't do the original. There's a woman named Jane Taylor wrote it. There you go.

I've completely made up a bit of trivia. One of them did. Good facts, though. I'll do my own research. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll come back. One of them did something really good at young. And that's what I reckon's happened at this daycare. They could have.

They found a modern Picasso. This could be great. And now they're going to look on the black market. Upside down face. What does Picasso do it again? He does all the... He does those cubism things. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He does all that. They found a bit of that. I found a bit of that in the daycare. But you have to imagine if you just like your kid was the trash one. You're like, what? I'm going to pay. I'm going to pay $1,000. A thousand bucks for my kids?

Like, Macor, I don't want it. If someone asks me, I'd be like, no. I'll do it myself. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alpha Bucks on hit. Alpha Bucks. You have 30 seconds to answer. 10 questions all starting with the same letter.

We have to take your first answer. You cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. We come back, of course, if there is time. Now, we are playing for 10K. Our player today is Vince. Hello, Vince. Hey, hey, how I are?

Oh, mate. We could be better. We've got 10 grand to give you, Vince. Are you going to take it office? Oh, I'm taking it. I'm going all the way to Brisbane with it, too, to watch the Broncos play. Oh, you're a Bronx fan, Vince.

Yeah, I'm a Bronco supporter. Yeah, baby. You've got Ducko on time. Go to the Bronx. Yes, really. We're a few and far between these parts, mate. How good? I was about to say, 10 grand just to get you to Brisbane.

That don't go a long way. Watch the pre-lim, baby. Watch and beat Penrith and the dynasty. Come on. Yeah, we know what you'll spend the money on. How do you usually go at the game? Yeah, no, I'm like, I'm pretty good. Like, I get into, I'm yelling now.

Yeah, he's still. I'm a Welsh fan. I'm a Reese Walsh fan. Yeah, baby. Can't knock on what he's in your team. Yeah, well, hopefully he's drinking toilet water in his weekend. I do agree. I hope so as well.

Or get sent off and comes back on and kills it. When I asked, how do you go at the game, I meant Alpha Bucks, but you turned it back into NRL chat. I thought you meant NRELA too. Yeah, I was like, why is he talking about Reese Waltz? Yeah, no, sorry. To be honest, I don't really play it. My friend said, oh, call up, call up.

And I was like, I'll give it a call. And God, I know, you know. So you just thought I was asking how you go at NRL? How's he got to support? Is he get nervous? Does he get loud? Who asks, how do you go supporting? Well, you've been talking about the NRL finals.

Yeah, I don't know. I feel a little bit dumb now, to be honest. No, no, no. I was with you on your same level. You're motivated. You're not dumb. You're a Bronx supporter. And the fact that friend has said you should call Vince,

Obviously, your friend believes in you. You'd be good at this game. Yeah, I believe in myself, too. I reckon I'll be good. All right. Let's give you a crack. Come on, mate. The letter you're going to work with Vince is Jay.

Is there a player starting with Jay in the Broncos? Ducco. I can't think of that I can't. Jesse Arthur's. Oh, of course she gets Jesse Arthur's. Oh, it's he the hot one. Everyone goes nuts for. Vince, you're playing with Jay for Jesse Arthur's, all right?

All right. Let's go. Here we go. Your time will start after the first. first question. Starting with the letter J, we need you to name something shiny. Jury. A cartoon character.

Um, a Jasper. A dog breed. Um, pass. An occupation. Um, Justice of the Peace. A five letter word.

Um, Jackie. An Olympic event. Um. He hung up, he hung up. That's not a good look for Broncos. It's not a great look, isn't it? It's not a great look for us. He started off, Will.

Have we ever had that happen? Someone bailed. Mid-mead call. I reckon he's hit the hang-up button on his phone. Oh, you don't think it was purposeful? He didn't say, I know him. He's not a quitter. Maybe his friend hit it, because could you hear his mate in the background?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, it was, and that also got occupation wrong. I don't think that... Justice of the Peace. That's not an occupation. That's an occupation, is it? And also a five-letter word, he said a six-letter word. Yeah, you're right.

And I don't think we accept names, do we? You can't say Jackie for a five-letter word. I don't think so. But also, yeah, anyway, look, Jasper out of the gate, though. I was like, we got a self-suppler. Who's Jasper the Ghost? Or was that Casper. Oh, geez.

Hey, no, there's a knock-off Jasper the Ghost. That's not a good item for the Broncos. You are so kind. Vince never call back. So nice. We're not all like Vince. You were supportive. He's supporting him the whole way.

I feel my kid, you know? I never need Broncos. Does he get the Crocs now, the supplementary prize? Yeah. I don't think he does. Oh, you have to wait. You've got to finish it. You've got to sit through the learnings to get the prize.

Oh, Vince. He hasn't tried to call back either, which is alarming. Maybe his phone died. Oh, no. This is my phone die. It's actually giving me a game this Sunday. Oh, that's not a good moment. I reckon if you're on sports bed.

Oh, no. That you could. Holy hell. The Bronx fans are in absolute. He'll lose shambles. Vince, he's calling back. Get along that. Get him.

Quick, he can't win. Maybe he's found a charge, a shy guy. Yeah, yeah, quick. We can't keep guys on. I want to speak to Vince. That is, that is not a good time for us. No, it's not. Let's find out.

Vince. I was packing my bags. I thought I was going to Brisbane. Vince, you hung up, mate. What happened? I definitely said, Jasper, not Caspar. I know you did, mate.

Yeah, I don't think that's going to pay that. That doesn't help. No. And also, why did you hang up? What? No, to be honest, I got excited. I don't know. I was like, I was nervous.

I got excited and I just pressed. I hung up. To be honest, I don't know. Content dumped. Not suitable for broadcast. Oh, dear. Piss, someone was naughty. That's okay, though.

The show is back in three, two, one. Also, we had to do. dump Vince because he saw You're all nuts. Hey Vince, mate, I'm the Bronx, baby! Yeah, go to Bronx, baby! Vince, you call back any time, sweetie.

Anytime, buddy. You got all the same. You got to press with Vince. You got some crooks to be in there, go. You too, mate, up the Bronx, we're going to do it. Oh, no. Jess and Ducko. That was fantastic. That was so fun.

That was just wonderful. If you missed it before we had, at our first ever Al-Fox player hang up intentionally mid-game. Well, he tried to tell us he was so sure he'd gotten 10 out of 10, even though we're only on question 5, that he started packing his bags to go up to Brisbane to watch the Broncos. Your boys play in the prelim. Two of those were wrong.

But we love his energy, and we love him fronting up. He called back. I think he wanted that supplementary prize in the Bronx, and he wasn't going to get it if he remained hidden. Bad omen for the weekend. It's not a good open. It's not a good at. But we get to play Alpha Bucks again at 8.

Yes, we do. Right now, Duck, I'm going to need you to take us over to the UK, please. Of course. Specifically, we're in Manchester. You're right. In a place called Spinning Fields. I'm assuming that's a suburb. Yeah.

We're at a very fancy restaurant. It's called Sexy Fish. Now, if I was going to name a restaurant, I don't eat seafood, but the name Sexy Fish is fan. That is a good name. That's a great name. It makes the fish sound good. It does.

They specialise, I think, in like the raw sashimi and the sushi. You want that to be sexy. You want it to be sexy, right? And it's a beautiful space. We're having a look on the Manchester evening news. Gorgeous. A lot of people celebrate anniversaries, proposals. Right.

Birthdays. And that's where we meet Julie and Peter in their 70s. They're celebrating Peter's birthday. They're having a grand old time enjoying sexy. Fish tacos. Shannon Noel was at the table next to them. When all of a sudden, in the restaurant, they have this humongous sculpture. The thing looks like it would weigh a ton.

It is, how tall do you reckon that is shy guy? Two by two. Two by two, maybe even bloody three by three. It's a picture of two sword. It's an art, a sculpture of two swordfishers, like clanging their swords. It's quite impressive. Crossing swords. Crossing swords.

A bit of a sword fight. When all of a sudden, Julius, telling the Manchester evening news, I could kind of hear some creaking. I could kind of hear something that sounded like bolts and nuts falling and slipping out. No, not a swordfish. When the piece of art,

these two gigantic swordfishers have come crashing down. From quite a hive. It's a tall restaurant. Oh, that's a big restaurant. The sculpture has fallen essentially on Peter the body's back, so it's launched him forward. He didn't get sorted through the chest. did he? Luckily he didn't. It's hit him in the

back but thrust him forward, which has thrust all the sashimi and the glass where the crockery onto Julie. No. So it's just absolute pandemonium. That could have killed him. genuinely, a swordfish through the back, that's a horrible way to go. I mean, a real swordfish could, can absolutely do. Those fishermen have to be very

careful because they launch into boats. Marlon, similarly. Look at you watching that dangerous fishing show. Wicked chuna. I bloody love it. Julie told people, told the Manchester Even News. This, he absolutely could have killed it. It certainly could have killed Peter. Actually, they sue now.

Unfortunately, she was left very wet because all the champagne has fallen onto her lap. So one of the sexy fish staff has run to a shop, Marks and Spencers, got her some fresh pants. What time of day was it? Night time. It's like a Kmart sort of. Yeah, Marks and Spencer.

I think it's like a part, it's like a Walmart vibe. So there's some food and some clothes. But so she had to take Peter to the. the hospital, but she drove him himself. Of course. They offered them a free meal. Oh, they gave us champagne and made sure we were all right. They haven't said they've comped the meal.

I'm assuming they've combed him. Sexy fish closed for the rest of the week. Because obviously they've got to work out now what to do with these swordfish. Do they put it back up? You can't be putting that back up. Imagine the person at the restaurant who's like, guys, I reckon we should hang these swordfish here. Everyone's like, ah, a bit of a risk. It's like the owner.

No, this is what happened. The owner's wife has gotten into sculpting. Can't you put it up in the restaurant, honey? All right, babe, no worries. Oh, it's just killed two of me patrons. They are confirmed in regular contact with Julie, Peter and other customers because everyone's traumatised. But we wanted to know 131060.

What fell on you? It doesn't have to be swordfish. I don't imagine we'll find another swordfish. I wouldn't be surprised if art has fallen off a wall, though. Yeah. That could happen to anyone. We were talking about art above the bed. Has that fallen on you?

Terrifying. Terrifying. Whether you're just using those sticky 3M hooks or you've nailed it into the wall. I would not trust a frame to not come smashing down overnight. We've had frames for them, but not on us, but just with those sticky hooks. And that sound of the class shuddering. 131060, what fell on you?

Huge heights. Maybe you're wily coyote. You'll have a few stories. NRL final tickets up for grabs. What fell on you? We'll get you on next. What fell on you? Can I pat your puppy?

Julie, 69-year-old lady from Manchester. She was looking at the huge art sculpture that was hung off the wall at her favorite sushi restaurant. Sexyfish. Sexyfish is a great name. It's such a good name. Simple but to the point. Trying to celebrate her husband's birthday. He's turning 72.

They go out for sashimi at sexy fish. Hell yeah. I think she was looking at that sculpture going, I know you were trouble when I walked in. Yeah, yeah. Because the sexy fish, swordfish has fallen off the wall from quite a height. Goodness me.

Hit Peter. Now, we're lucky it didn't pierce him. He did go to hospital, but he's all right. She ends up with wet pants when the drinks that they were enjoying splacked off all over her. You can't recover from that. No, you can't. I'd rather get the swordfish to the back. The staff were absolutely distraught because it could have killed us.

Yeah. It was just shocking. Everybody was in shock. and everybody was shaking, says Julie. I'll get a bad review. A hundred percent, while the video's trending, obviously. They closed for the remainder of the day while a full safety inspection was conducted.

All remaining artwork has been checked. Yeah, you can't be hanging the swordfish again. I think that's the end of them. I think it's the end of them. But now the issue is that was a big space that the swordfish took up. Now it's going to be empty. What are you feeling with that?

I don't know. You know what they need? Paper mache swordfish. Yeah. So if it does fall... Gentle. It's got to hurt anyone. Yeah, I agree.

The swordfish will break. not the human beings. Yeah, yeah. But it begs the question, what fell on you? We go to Taylor on 131060. Taylor, what fell on you? We were at our local pub with our friends, and my friend's husband decided to get up on the bar,

and he was doing a bit of a dance on the bar, and then thought he'd tested out the beam on the roof, and he grabs onto it. He has a few swings, and then his hands just gave way. And I was sitting at the bar on a stool, right where he dropped and fell and knocked me off the stool.

Sorry, Taylor. And people were filming him, though. Like, so they were filming him on the bar. They filmed him fall on me too. Well, we need to see that video, Taylor. We're going to, you please send it to us. Just and Ducker on Instagram. Yeah.

On what planet do we coyote ugly and get up on bars at pubs? Oh, we're a little small country town out at Gresford Basie Way. Sure, but is that a thing? I didn't think that was part of the bloody RSA. At the local pub and Gresford days, just getting on, hang and swinging. Oh, it was his night to perform. Did everyone, he's like, what's his name? What's his name? Throw him under the bars.

His name's Josh. Yeah, and his classic Josh gear. Just getting up having a swing and then all of a sudden, bang, Josh lands on Taylor. Yeah, living his best life. That is amazing. Send us the video. Jesse Nakko on Instagram, Taylor. We got a Cam on 13, 1060.

Cam, what fell on you? A horse. From quite a height, Cam? No, no. Well, not really. I was only 18. I'm 54 now, so it was a long time ago. but I was at my boyfriend's farm

and, you know, me being 18, I thought I knew everything and he wanted to go in the round yard first just to make sure the horse and I were comfortable with each other and it was a really windy day and I was like, no, I'm good, I'm good, I'm going out now so I went to go out through the gate but the wind blew and it blew on the horse's butt

so the horse reared up, bucked me off. I would have been fine, but then the gate hit the horse again and she stumbled and all I remember is seeing this big horses, but just coming down on me. Oh, no. Ended up with... Yeah, they're big.

The horses outside. Oh, they're big. Yeah, yeah. You ended up with what? A fractured pelvis. Oh, fractured pelvis. Yeah. It fell right, right there.

Yeah. Well, that's what's on you. Yeah. That's a different one. And then when it got up, it trot on me, and I had a distinct horse shoe mark, like bruise on my thigh. She said, yeah. Damn.

I did get done. I did get done. Oh, it was like, oh, it was like, week, months, actually, it took quite a while. And I was only 18, so it was, yeah, it was horrific. When you break your pelvis, Cam, I can't imagine you're putting a cast. Like, what's the recovery? You just have to be dead ring for months.

There's nothing they can do for it. You just got to lay flat for a long time and just let it heal. And no shagging, I'd imagine, Cam. Oh, God, no, no. And even just to go to the toilet was absolutely excruciating. Big enough your shoes. I reckon tomorrow on that we'll do, what's that on you? What's that on you?

Yeah, yeah. Cam, just one more question for Cam? Did you ever get back on the horse? Oh, great question. Not for a very long time. Probably about 20 years later I decided to get back on a horse, yeah. Oh, do. That would have put me off a life.

Cam, thank you very much. We go to Kim on 13, 1060. Kim, these have been fantastic. What a fell on you? Well, not me. It was my grandmother. Back when I was a teenager, we, as when we were growing up, we used to melt lead to make our own lead sinkers for fishing.

Oh, hello. Very handy, yeah. The cast iron skillet was full of lead that we had melted all down and things. And for some reason it was off, you know, hanging off in a garage just off a little hook type of thing, or it might have been just an old nail, that gave way when my grandmother was standing in front of it and it's come straight down across the top of her foot, breaking multiple bones. And her foot was like black and swollen for about two months. She could hardly walk, so.

Not man. Poor man. Poor Nen. Just trying to save a buck making her own fishing tinkers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's the punishment. Well, it wasn't her that used to make him. It was my grandfather.

He'd only just passed shortly before this happened. Oh, I know. Which, of course. Do you think it was a sign? Yeah, his old wheelchair we had to use for Nen for a couple of months there and that until she could actually use a foot to walk again. Well, at least he came in handy then, you know, because he sort of, I feel like it's his fault that happened. Absolutely.

That's a sign from the other side. The least he can do us give her the wheelchair. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you, Kim. Wow. Well, they were fantastic. weren't they?

great, they were some great following stories. And they've all suffered way more than this bloke. I got knocked by a sculpture. He was actually fine. She got wet pants. She did get wet pants and she had to go buy new pants. Jess and Ducko. I reckon producer shy guys having a glass of milk.

Glass of milk and a little biscuit, aren't you? My milk, man look, my milk. Shy guy. I'm so excited. I want shy guys. As you should be, you join, well, amazing company. You do. Sorry, Dougo.

I'm just distracted. Did you feel that? That thought as today's box was slammed on the desk. We just did 131060 what fell on you. I'd hate for this to fall on me. I reckon it could cause some serious injury. Knock you out, you reckon. It would knock you out.

There's a free clue for you. It's a simple game. Shagas, good at a fair few things, but not describing things. So we get him to describe certain things. It is all serial this year. So he gives you a clue. They're very average clues. You've got to guess what it is.

You can win a jiz bit. You can win a magnet. Bottle opener. No more. jars of Muti? No more. I've needed to take jars back. You've taken your Muti's home? Now I'm scared of plastic. I'm going to put everything in jars. So what you will get is, as you said, Darko, the glory. That's the real takeaway. And an unopened, but we cannot confirm whether or not it will be tampered with box of today's cereal. Yeah. What are you

got for us today? Shaggot, first clue, please, sir, from Audi. Ooh, can I see the ball? I haven't actually seen this one today. Oh my God. I grew up with them. I thought it was washing detergent when he slapped it on the thing. Don't you reckon? Don't you reckon? Yeah, we grew up with them. Did you? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.

They look horrific. There's another clue. You know what? They taste pretty spot on to the OG. Oh, that's another clue. Oh, geez, we're giving extra clues left, right and center. 13, 1060. Call us.

Call us. Let's play shy guy dips. Yeah. You get another clue on top of that as well. Oh my God, you've already had 15. If you don't get it now, it's no hope. Come on. Jess and Ducko.

Daco. I reckon produces shy guys having a glass of milk. Glass of milk and a little biscuit, aren't you? My milk, man, my milk. Shy guy dips. I'm so excited. I want shy guy's box. He's got many skills describing things he's not one of them.

So we've challenged him all year. Yeah. Pick a cereal. Try and describe it to the rice cookers if they get it. Not only do they win said box of cereal, they win the glory. Absolutely glory. Of being able to speak shy guy in ease. Tough language to speak.

It's not on duolingo. This is the only way you can learn and get better at it. We've heard, it's from Aldi. Yep. We've also heard Ducko grew up with this. Yep. And I mistook it for a box of washing powder because the box was that dense. It's a thick boy.

And rectangular. Yeah. It's very confusing. So we go to Alex now on 131060 who's called in. Hello, Alex. Morning, go. Alex, you've already had about three clues. But Shy Guy is going to give you officially another one.

What are you got for her? Alex, your next clue is flaky. I don't know if he's ever described a serial like that. Look at him. Watches the Bonnie Blue, Docco, and just rolls out with different clues. He's learned some new vocab. Alex, what do you think? I was originally thinking something else, but I'm going to go with the Audi cornflakes.

Oh, that is a great guess. That makes a lot of sense. Because it does make a lot of sense. It's not that, though, Alex. I would argue, though, Daco, if you were to thud a box of cornflakes, I don't think it's making as dense of a sound. That's another clue. I think it's another clue.

Mel, good morning. Good morning. Mel, we've heard they're from Lundy. They're flaky. Flaky. You get another clue. The box is predominantly blue, but there's a red ribbon along the top and the bottom on the backside. Jeez, he's feeling good today.

Ribbet, like even ribbon, I would think he's confusing, but that's fine. Yeah, yeah, that's him, mate. What do you think, Mel? All right, you're throwing me with a red ribbon. I had breakfast bubbles. It's a blue box. Oh, breakfast bubble. Is that like the Aldi rice bubbles?

It's like the Audi rice bubbles. It is not that, but I do like your guess. Once again, I think too light for what we're going for. And also, would you say a bubble is flaky? I don't know. I don't know. Let's put it all together, people. 13, 1060.

Call us. We've got Glenn. Hello, Glenn. There you go. Glenn, we're fantastic. It's not the Aldi bubbles and it's not the Aldi Corn Flakes. You get another clue. and I'd like to report shy guy has opened the box.

He's opened it. Oh, my God. Geez, you're going to have a bite? Go, go Raw Doggers. Well, the next clue was going to be something, but I'll do that. I'll break one in half. Oh, we're going to do an audio clue. Glenn, turn your ears on down.

We're doing an audio clue in itself. I'm going to break it in half. We're doing an audio clue here, Glenn. This is radio. Oh, jeez. That was flaky. It was great. It's all out.

What a day, Glenn. What a time to be alive. Over to you, good sir. What do you think? Is it the Whipix? Wait, say that again, Glenn. Is it the out of the wittics?

Ah, but I need the name. We need the name of it, Glenn. Oh, Is it a wet box? You also need a new phone, Glenn. Are you in the tunnel? Where are you? Glenn, this is important.

What do you have a name for us? Is it weak box? Oh, God. Oh, God, you are close. Different box. He is flirting with that. Oh, sorry, Glenn. He's tickling it.

He's crawled so someone else can walk right now. I reckon. 131060. He did all the work. He did everything. Aldi Wheat Bix is not called Wheat Box. No, it's not. It's called it. I'd like a wheat box. It's called something else. We're getting to the business end now. We absolutely are. A lot of people calling through. Full phone lines. The stakes couldn't be higher, Duccoe, because if you fumble now, how embarrassing. Shagha, can you please just give us your next clue? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It starts with a V. Start with a V. Jake.

We go to Jakey boy. Yeah, how you going? Yeah, we're fantastic. Jake, what is Shagai's box today? The wheat biscuit. Wrong. No, Jake. No, Jake.

No. Starts with a V. Oh, it starts with a V. Yeah, he said V biscuits. V starts with a V. It's in Aldi. It is a big blue box. It's dense.

Ducco grew up with it. I grew up with it. Come on. Another clue. How many do you guys do? I wouldn't eat that crap. That's not food to me. I have five or six.

What I used to have it with, we used to grow up with it with Activite on top. Oh, yeah. Now, Activite is the poor man's. Milo. And this is the poor man's. That's an interesting combo. Yeah, thank you. Ashley, good morning.

Good morning. How are you? Yeah, good. Do you need another clue, darling? Or are you good? No, I've got it. I know what it is. What is it?

It's vital wheat. Yeah. Wait, what did you say? Wait. Vida. Vida. What? Vida.

Vida wheat. Vita wheat. Vida, moz. Sorry, I job, I went half-pice. No, you heard Vida. I'm not excited. I just wanted to get out. Ashley, it's not Viter Mour.

Oh, my God, get in there. What do you call a POMBIN person? It's not. I'm looking at the box. Don't argue with us. Oh, yeah, yeah, Vitermur. Damn it, can I have another clue then? All right, the second part of the word starts with B.

You're a room. Oh, damn it. What the heck. You're ruined the chance of the NRL tickets anyway, just for getting involved. What a day. I'll give you the hot TV. You're not going to win him. Is it Vita Bits?

No, you are so close. It's not Vita Bits. Is there anyone else on the line that has it? We have a full board of calls and not one person has it. Ashley, we're just going to keep hitting Ashley. What about the home number? Ashley, you get one go. One more go.

What is the cereal? What is that? What is it? Um, oh, I don't. No, you're done. Oh, you're done. Oh, that's so... Brendan, put us out of our misery, please.

Brendan. Is it Vita Brits? Yes! Thank you, Jesus. Oh, God. Brendan, good boy. Have you enjoyed a Viter Brit recently, or did you just put all the clues together and work it out?

I put all the clues together. My old man, you see them all the time. What a legend. They're great. They're good. You know, they do the job, you know? Babson, she answered 10 calls we said vital wits. Anyway, Jess, can you please quickly get Brendan to do this?

Okay, Brendan, come on. You obviously have got, you're switched on. And I know you're going to do this in one take. Hi, my name's Brendan. My name's Brendan. And I'm so excited. I just won Shy Guy's box. Okay, rolling and action, Brendan.

Hi, my name's Brendan, and I'm so excited. I just want Shy Guy's box. Oh, my God, yeah. Jess and Ducko. We did it. We're halfway this. there. At 6.30, we let a Bronco supporter play Alpha Barks, and it went as well as you can imagine. He's the first player we've had to pull out halfway through and quit. And then claim me one.

That's your people. That you Bronco support us. Actually, I was feeling good about this weekend against Penrith, and now I'm actually shiting myself. I think that was the first time Vince has contributed to the show, because I got really excited. I love the name Vince. So he's going to be a player. He said, oh, I'm good. Yeah, yeah. He wasn't. He wasn't. And then you had to dump him because he dropped an S ball. So, if you're a Penrith supporter, maybe you'd like to have a go at 8am, you might be able to do better. Hey, right now, this is a bit of fun. Jess doesn't know what we're about to do.

So, all this week, all this week, you've been giving us an update on your parents overseas. Yeah, it's right, they're in the south of France. Yeah. Can you explain what they did? Just briefly. Touched base with them earlier in the week and my dad said, sorry, we're busy. I've accidentally set the fire alarm off in our hotel, caused a mass evacuation.

I went, what the hell happened? He revealed he'd lit a scented candle. We're assuming to woo my mother. Yeah, yeah. You cannot have an open flame in a hotel. And it's so funny, I was literally about to say to you, they've kind of gone, am I having? Yeah, they have.

Because, well, I've got up there to know that because you tried to then get info out of them. I wanted to know what scent of candle my father chose. They evacuated an entire boutique hotel. There was outrage among, the French authorities, and we thought, imagine if this had made the news over there. Like, we do silly little news stories all the time. We literally just touched on a news story from the Manchester evening news about a swordfish sculpture,

nearly killing a bloke. So, yes, these things can go global. So Shagall and I and Babs yesterday, with the help of our news team, because our news team obviously have, like, other French connections. Correspondence. Pipelines. We just looked everywhere through French stuff and radio shows. We sent someone to France, too.

Oh, he's got cousins. These French heritage. Then there's a famous radio show over there that broadcast to a lot of friends called Julian Stefani. And they call them De Les Grosse Tetein, which translates to The Big Heads.

That's obviously that funny radio show. We then found audio, which we had to translate. Luckily, I've got, you know, minimal French heritage. And it turns out, this was big news over there. It made the news.

This was covered. I've got the French radio audio of Jess's parents trying to have sex and setting a hotel nearly on fire. RTL Hello, it's Sebastian Rauxhall I'll give you a rendezvous

each day at 18 hour on RTL and the application RTL for a new episode of Choir InfoRTL a story to care of the

actuality and the info that it never boogie boogie boon boon that you can see they got grabs with your parents

your mom basically said he said You too nearly set the place on fire. Your dad said, what? And they said, what were you trying to do? Your mum said, the willie. And they said, these silly Aussies now need to pay thousands of dollars. They need to get out of here.

For wasting the French authorities time. Exactly. Your mum said, boogie, boogie. And that's before they, I think, were sent to jail. So you better check it on them. I've tried. I sent them. And I thought, I'll piss them off asking for too much info.

So now they're not talking to me. So I send videos of my daughter that usually can get them responsible. I've got nothing. Genuinely. Truly. They've not... You better check it. You better pay their bail. My God. And you know I don't answer phone calls. It's certainly from numbers I don't have saved.

I've had a few missed calls. For France? From the France? Like a different plus like 9-48. This one says Victoria, but still, maybe it's rerouting through a weird tower. So anyway... I bet a call back? It's making local radio over there. There are people taking the piss out of your parents.

They've become a news article. On the big heads radio. Jess and Ducco. Big weekend of finals, 40 all around. AFL grandfinal, Friday. Saturday, the lions take on the cats. Well, the celebrations start Friday and go into Saturday. So technically, Friday. It's a Friday, baby. I'm calling that new phrase. Mate, Victoria takes the Friday as a public holiday, so they can have the parade.

That's a Friday. That's what I call a fraturday. When Friday rolls into Saturday. Yeah, Fradley. Oh, I think you've just coined a new phrase there, brother. My dyslexia has just coined us a new phrase. You're welcome. Fraturday. Anyway, Snoop Doggy Dogg, we know he's the pre-show entertainment for the AFL final

Friday. Which is a contentious role. It's had a lot of negative press, mainly looking at you, meatloaf. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, Snoop Dog, big shoes to fill. Huge shoes to fill. He was basically just at the MCG yesterday, a bunch of footage going around where he kicked an AFL goal.

No way. He literally kicks the goal and he's like... But it's a hard goal. It's not like he's 50 metres out directly front. He snaps a banana from the side. It's incredible. And I only saw a snippet. that the Dacost brothers had given him a bit of coaching.

Jesus, it's pretty good coach. I don't realize how tall Snoop Dog was. He's long. He's long, isn't he? Like, he'd be a rockman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't imagine him taking shots at goal. No, he'd be in the middle.

He's fantastic. So he's kicked a goal. If the cats need a fill in, get Snoop Doggied up. Can Snoop Dog play for the cats? Probably not. Probably not. Different cat. A cat and dog ate each other.

He's more of a lion guy. Maybe. Yeah, yeah. Didn't he try and get his name to be Snoop Lion for a bill? Yeah, there was when he went. Um, reggae. He went and it didn't catch. And he's like, I'm going to go back to Snoop Dog.

I'll go back to Snoop Dog. Yeah, yeah. So if maybe the lions need someone to come off the bench, Snoop doggie Dog is there. He was fantastic. His form was great. First time holding an AFL ball. I'm thinking it was the first time he was even on the G and he worked out what AFL was.

Yeah, he was there to do some choreography. And he's like, I'll pick up one of those balls. I'll do it. Let me have a go. And he did it all high. Anyway, but that is Friday. Friday. Very exciting times.

Up next, I go, there's a bit of a trend. I was doom scrolling on tiki-tocky yesterday. Oh, yeah. I thought we could all jump on board this trend. So the young ones think we're cool. Okay. And I'll run you through it on the other side of it. Jess and ducco.

You know, I'll look for any excuse to feel connected to the youth. To look cool. Like I know what's up and what they're talking about. Hell yeah, man. There's a trend I want to jump on. I thought we could all have a go. It's how lucky am I to be alive at the same time as. I see.

Now, I've seen a lot of people do it. Originally, I think it started as the same time as my boyfriend or my fiancé. It's cute vision of them living their best. Boring. Boring. It's kind of morph now into like modern, and I use modern in quotation mark, and invention in quotation marks. Right.

So one I saw yesterday was, how lucky am I to be alive at the same time as strawberry matcha? Not lucky at all. March it is disgusting. But for her, she feels so. lucky to be alive at the time of strawberry marcher. If she was born 50 years earlier, she would never have had a strawberry marcher. I see. So it's like, we're grateful

for these modern inventions in our time. Exactly. And it could be very unique to you. You've seen this trend babes happening a bit? No, you're on top of the trends. That's up. I'm on top of the trends, baby. So for me, when I saw this, I was like, I'm so lucky to be alive at the same

time as Instagram spawn con. Why's that? 50 years earlier, wouldn't have got a couple of discounts that I really need to get this Renault over the line. Thank you, Instagram. Ducco, anything come to mind for you? I'm so lucky to be alive in the same time as spell check.

Need that. I'll tell you what, even on my phone. Spell check, but also now how just the iPhone will correct it for you. Doesn't always get it exactly what you wanted the word? Yeah, yeah. Like you wanted definitely, not defiantly, tries to have a go. At GPT, we're like, I think you meant this. I'm like, you get me.

You get me. Shagai, what about for you? Finish the sentence. I'm so lucky to be alive at the same time as my air conditioner having Wi-Fi. So I don't have to get it and get the remote to turn it on and on. Is that all your phone? Yeah, it's all on my phone. I don't know where the remote is anymore.

Really? Yeah. Oh, that's like my brother absolutely losing his mind over the Bluetooth connectivity to his kettle. So he didn't have to get off the couch. Is it your split system unit, does that? Yeah, yeah. That's exciting. Crazy bugger.

That's great news. I'm just on the lounge and I feel a bit hot and I go, and that makes it so dangerous to just whack it on whatever. Can you turn it on when you're... I can turn it on right now. Can you say... And the house will be cold. Do it.

Do it. What can I add before we get to Babs? I'm so lucky to be alive at the same time as the rearview camera in McHale. Because I'm lies. No one needs that thing more than you. I need a bobhead camera as well. Kind of links into the Instagram SpornCon. Yeah, yeah, it does, doesn't it?

Sweet Babs. All right. I'm lucky to be alive at the same time as sexy Bokeyrexona deodorant. Hey. What's the... What's the... What's the...

What's the? Sexy bouquet. It's the best. I've never seen you so passionate. Is it just a deodorant? Yeah. Have you tried the other sense, but sexy bouquet. This one I've been running with since I was like 11.

Yeah, and it just gets you going. Yeah. And if I didn't have it, I just don't know what I would do. Sexy bouquet. That's just the boy equivalent of links. Links Africa. Yeah. Yes, is it quite pungent?

Like, it's a strong smell. It just smells so nice. I don't know if it lasts a long time. It's just like, you know, the best. You're going to have to bring it in one day and we'll all have to the sexy bouquet party. Yeah, you'll like it. It's good. Hell yeah.

Anyway, well done, guys. Great luck. We're cool with the kids. We're up with it, guys. Jess and Ducco. Yeah, a Bronco supporter at 630. I got very excited by it. He was the first ever player to hang up on himself halfway through the game intentionally.

Oopsie. And we can confirm he tried to say, Jasper the Ghost for a cartoon character Casper doesn't have a cousin. I tried to let that one slide through to get him two out of ten and you guys like, no. Anyway, that's coming out of. Great support for you and your comrades. Unfortunately, not a great look.

Die for the game this weekend. I'm nervous now because of Vince. Well, speaking of nerves, ducko. There were nerves rolling around the studio yesterday. We had a good friend of the show, Ranger Mick. Ranger Mick. He came in from the Australian Reptile Park. They do great stuff there. They do great stuff.

they have great activations, particularly around school holidays, which we know are around the corner, and everyone's favourite, blueie and bingo, I'm assuming mum and dad. They're there. God, maybe Indy will be there as well. Who knows? They're going to be there roaming around for school holidays and have some fun stuff. Yep, so you can book online, save up to 21% off tickets, reptilepark.com.

And so rang jimic came to tell us that good news and brought some friends. He did yesterday, yeah. Because, well, I mean, I let slips more like snakes. What have we learned on this show? You've got to be careful what you say, because shy guy and Babs will use it against us. Did you notice how they took up position firmly in one corner of the room behind cameras? To film.

I had to film. You and I stationed with Ranger Mick while he showed us while we were blindfolders. We got to feel a range of his friends he brought from the reptile path. And there was a turtle, fine. But there was a lizard, fine. Fine. Then there was a some, what was it called? Corn snake.

It was a brown and orange snake that looked deadly. I know it's not. But the way it moves so fast. And it's funny because you, exactly. Your logical brain goes. goes, there's no way this guy's brought in a lethal snake. I doubt it even had teeth. But also, the survival instinct, and he goes, it's a snake.

It's a classic thing where blindfolded. We're going to put her hands out. And he moves my hand. I touch the snake. And you can see the video now. It's up on Jess and Ducko. I flip out. And then the snake pretty much goes in Jess's crotch.

That's straight for it. You startled the little corny, and she's come straight for me crotch. Yeah, she's gone straight. And you didn't move. She's like, where can I hide? You were speaking parcel tongue to that thing. I don't know what you were telling it to do, but you didn't move. It's funny, because I am a lizard queen.

I love a lizard. I'm not a huge fan of the snake. Lizards and conspiracy theories. You're really painting a picture for yourself now, aren't you? Lucky I'm already married. Angus can't leave me. Well, you're right. He's not, he's not chained to the bed.

That was a pre-n-up. But you're right. Maybe I'm a snake guy now as well. I didn't mind the corn snake. Oh, it was gross. And the fact it came to me after you scared it. No, I don't like them. I like that it shows me as a safe place with which to borrow in.

Just like, come on in. I haven't seen this much action for months. He works so much, Ducco. Check the video right now, Jess and Daco. Yes, do that. Big shout out to Australian reptile park. They do great things. But right now, shall we give away some money?

Absolutely. We've got $10,000. And hey, speaking of school holidays, imagine what you could do with school holidays, entertain the family, keep the kids occupied. Yes. So get involved. But again, if you follow the broad.

Enough damage has been done. Do we need to make reparations? Make reparation. Reprimanding. Okay, this could go either way. It could. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alphabucks on hit.

Yes, indeed. You have 30 seconds. 10 questions all starting with the same letter. I have to take first answer. Can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the questions, say pass. We come back if there is time. We're playing for 10K.

Our player today is Jack. Hello, Jack. There you go, mate. Jackie Boy. Now, we did ask for a Bronco supporter because at 6.30, we had one of the all-time. I was going to say great. Well, it was one of the worst performances we've seen. One of the worst.

And a hang-up mid-game, which is unprecedented. Jack, are you a Bronco supporter to try and correct the tide for Broncos? No, I go for the rabbits. Oh, I go to the rabbits. Okay. Further thing from a Bronco supporter. No hope for you in the finals then. But so who are you going for this weekend then, Jack?

Probably Penra. It would be good to see him to see him doing it again. No, man, it wouldn't. Never wanted someone to win less, Jack. Well, let's see. Maybe Jack will go all the way. Filled by this. If Jack wins is bad omen for me.

Really bad omen. I think you can hang up your Broncos beanie. They're not going to win. Jack, what do you want to spend 10 grand on? Oh, just family and the holidays and stuff like that. Yeah. Love it. Somewhere.

Definitely. Well, maybe you'd like to consider Kazakhstan or Kenya? Beautiful this time of year I hear, Jack. Take the kids, it's cheap. The cherry blossoms are blooming. It starts with K. I don't know why the place is starting with K.

Killa Mujaro. Anyway, you're working with K, all right, Jack? All right, can't change it now. For Kazakhstan. Let's do it for Ballarat. Your time. We'll start after the first question. Are you ready?

Yep. Starting with letter K, we need you to name, a female celebrity. Kim Goddash in. A car brand. Pass. A verb. Pass. An instrument.

A pass. A water sport. Pass. An occupation. Pass. A rom-com. Pass. A five-letter word.

A household item. A musical A car brand A verb She got one The Broncos got it better And he's got it better And he hung up halfway through

To be fair What did Vince walk around Three And Jack got Jack got one One Uh yeah He got Kim Kardashian

He's a strong one He said Robbcom Something nice with an end Look Kim Kardashian You came out of the gates Flying big show up And then a car brand Kia

Averb Averb kick An instrument Keyboard water sport, kayaking, an occupation, kindergarten teacher or a knife maker, a rom-com knocked up, a five-letter word, there's plenty, kebab could have been one, household item, keys. Jack, I mean, unlucky. Do you say knife or nice, sorry?

Knife or nice? Nice, nice. Oh, sorry, you did get that, man. My apologies, I thought you said nice. Sorry, you got two. You got a hundred-old suspended crocs, though, mate. Your feet are going to look delicious. Thank you very much.

I'll give you a Justin Ducko Giz bit. Yeah, we'll give you that. You can wear it with pride. We'll give you kids the Jess and Ducko gibbets, okay, Jack? Oh, thank you very much. You're welcome. Cheers, mate. Have a great rest of your week.

I will do. Thanks, Jack. How can he go worse? You know what? Actually, that's an interesting study for the end of the year, Ducko. Bronco supporter ended up on three. A rabidoh supporter, too. Like, who are the smarter supporters?

Oh, the smartest. With Alfa Bucks, that could be a fun little behind the scenes. When we get above three? When we get above three? Maybe we just do the worst. Oh, Cindy Roosters got 10, has it? La Dita. La Dita.

Up next time. My sister's become a bridezilla. I need to unpack what she's done. This is a hell of a transformation for young Laura. Oh, my goodness. Or do you want to change her name? No, it's too I know. Yes and Ducco.

Calling all Bridezilla's. Was your friend? Was it a sibling? Hey, man, I'd love to hear from one themselves. You can say, I know I went nuts. Yep. How nuts did the Bridezilla go? Yeah.

How Bridezilla did Zilla? Did Zilla go? That's right. We're looking for peak Zilla. Peak Zillars. We may have found the queen of the pile, though. We have a royal wedding coming up this week. It's my sister's wedding and my entire family is treating it.

Well, my mum and my sister. Like it's the royal wedding. Bigger than Ben heard this thing. Truly. This has been, well, obviously a month's long run up because you have to plan. But what you've been sharing behind the scenes about how nitty-gritty some of these details are becoming, I've never really heard anything like it. It started off with we're not allowed to bring Flo to the ceremony because there's no babies allowed

and their uncle has a kid but they don't really like the uncle's new child or something like that. So if our child comes, if our child comes, then that child has to come, they don't want that. So Flo just can't come. And we're like, okay, sure. Then my grandma had a white dress with black polka dots. Now, it was really just a black and white dress. It was totally fine. Laura is outraged, my sister. She's not allowed to wear white because the bride is obviously wearing white? Because obviously the guests will be confused. Which one is the... Which one's the VIP? Is it the old lady in the

wheelchair? Or is it that gorgeous young thing in a wedding? And she's 90 and it's literally white with Poconos. You can't say no to a grandma. That's where she got me offside. Yeah, you can't say no to Merrill. I mean, my older sister's wedding, so I wore a white tucks so I was like, really, you can't be mad. Anyway, cut to this weekend.

We get sent an email. The bridal parties all in a group message. She's been very active, very excited. Wedding week, lots of photos. We get sent a run sheet, an itinery, that starts at 11 a.m. tomorrow, so the wedding's on Friday. So my, I'm planned out to, within 15 minutes of its life. 15 minute increments. Yep. From tomorrow at 11 a.m. until Sunday night.

So that covers day before, day of recovery. Yes. And then when you're meant to sort of be slowly making your way home. Yeah, correct. She's still accounting for where, well, not just you. How many people? There's 12. The rival parties.

So 12 people, and there's a separate grooms run sheet and bridesmaids run sheet, okay? So, for example, like the bridesmaids, Morgan sees it. Morgan's like, wait a minute. On the morning of the wedding, I'm going to be at the house at 6am. My makeup's at 9. She's supplying vibes. She's obviously there for the vibes. And, you know, she wants to be enjoying the croissant platter that I'm assuming Laura has provided.

Yeah. Well, I get there at 9 for mine. Now, she's leaving got it to, like, what time we arrive for the lunch tomorrow, who's meeting where, what time we need to be there, She's even got, when we have lunch on the wedding day, boys, eat lunch, 12, in brackets, take jackets off, close brackets. 1220, bow ties on. Make sure watch YouTube. Link to YouTube tutorial.

Sorry? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1230, bow ties on, sitting, waiting, ready to go. Like, it is... Oh, God forbid you standing. I know, I know. If she finds out you stood... Can I eat lunch when I'm not meant to?

Wow. It has got ever, like, take jackets off when you're meant to, what you drink and enjoy yourselves for this time. She has used the word enjoy yourselves, that she? Yep, she's using the joy yourselves. It'll be tough on. Recovery Day. We've got to arrive at 11 a. And Bridal Puddy needs to be there first.

I'm like... Who cares once is the recovery? You're rolling when you roll in. That's what I would have thought. Yeah, we've got... It's literally planned every 15 minute to half an hour intervals. Does she have this sort of personality, ducko? She's a planner.

Sure. She's a planner. We're a planners, I suppose, in the family. And she's in, you know, promotions and marketing events. But, geez, I didn't see this coming. Like, the fact that we have... Next level. We have a run sheet for three days of what to do in intervals.

It makes me nervous for her. Is she going to be able to enjoy her day? Because you know what they say, and you and I can attest, it goes by in a blink of an eye. And if she is beholden to the 15-minute run sheet, I don't know if she's going to be able to actually enjoy it. I don't know either. Because God forbid she finds out you sat when you're meant to be standing or vice versa.

You go off script. I'm also a groomsman and I'm seeing it. So don't get me wrong, I'm not enjoying anything. They've also got the celebrant emailing me what she's saying about them so I make sure that she's on the right track. What she meant to, like, approve my script? Yeah, Laura's put me forward to approve the script. I was in about four group emails last night with the planner.

I've never heard that before. No, the celebrant. I certainly don't offer that. Yeah, yeah. And what a responsibility for you? What are you meant to read a 15-minute ceremony, which could be 12 pages and go, oh, no, sorry, I don't reckon she would like that phrasing. Exactly.

I'm not going to, I'm just going to say, yeah, looks great. I was in like, man, I was looking at seating plans last time. I was looking at what the decorations were, what time we're doing this, I'd celebrate. Because you know what the danger is? If anything falls down, does it come back on you? Ducker, you were meant to have checked it. Yeah, it probably does. And you didn't.

It probably does. Because she might never see the celebrant again, but she's going to see her brother again. Oh, my God. That's way too much. I could send a list of a full page from the art. That's another plan that's got for the housekeeping. I was like, mate, people know where the toilets and the bar are. Like, what is this wedding?

You know, people know where they want to vape if they want a vape. This is like a meeting of the U. Crazy. I've done events for big corporate companies as an MC. They've been less archives and less chaotic than this. This is unreal. Now, I can't relate because you know me. I was the opposite of a bridezilla. I wasn't even involved.

My husband. Angus was the groomsilla. He was the groomszilla. But even he, similarly being in events and marketing, he didn't even have something like this. Laura has taken it to another level. But we'd love to find anyone, anyone who can relate. Who can relate?

What they do? Were you the family, or the MC or would love to hear from one themselves. Can you admit to being a bit of a Bridezilla? You can look back now and sort of laugh and have a joke about it. Hey man, you can take credit being like, because I was a Bridezilla, I had the best freaking day ever. Yeah.

If you want to admit to that. 13, 1060, NRL final tickets, of course, up for grabs of the call of fame. Bridezillas. Unite. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. I've got to leave post show today, drive to Byron. I'll be doing my show, my show, this show, from Byron tomorrow.

You're part of this show. Yeah, part of this show from Byron Tomorrow because I have my sister's wedding. It's on Friday. Your little sister has found the love of her life and she's planned quite the affair. Yeah. So much so. You've received a run sheet. It's about 300 pages long.

Ridiculous. In 15 minute increments. It says when to take the jackets off when we're eating lunch to enjoy ourselves. It has a link to the bow ties being tied. It tells Morgan that she's going to be there at 6am for her makeup, which starts at 9. We've three days of planning and run sheets. Three wedding, day of. wedding and recovery is all timed

out. It's all timed out. I thought Bridezilla's were a bit of an internet thing. You know, you see those stories go viral. But no, we've actually got a live one. We've got a real one. My darling little sister. And look, she's doing a great job organising her own wedding. And I'm emceeing and I'm a groomsland, so I'm very busy. You know, and I'm on a lot of group emails now about run sheets and

seating plans and styling. This better be the best freaking wedding ever because it's been planned with an inch of its life. It has been. God forbid something goes, have you reminded her of all the things that went awry at your wedding? Like, you could have had a run sheet that detailed. It doesn't stop your dad getting stuck in a lift. You know what piss me off more than anything? Our wedding got moved twice because of COVID.

Plus, the morning of a wedding was like a hurricane or a cyclone or some ridiculous weather events or got moved from outside, inside. Dad got stuck in a lift. All his bad things. Couldn't have it out on the beach. It was rained out, whatever. It's like perfect weather and barren this week. Laura sends a message and goes, geez, I hope this wind dies down for the ceremony.

I've not factored in my veil being blown around for the photography. I was like, oh, God forbid there's a gusty breeze. Anyway, hopefully they're not listening. 13, 10, 60. Nah, she'll be getting her makeup done or, I don't know, nails done. Something. We go to Jen. Jen, there was a bridezilla and your family's wedding.

Sure was. Tell us about it, Jen. Hello. Jen, how are you? Fellow celebrant, Jess. Oh, here we go. You would have seen it all then, Jen. Have seen a few.

Yeah, great. Oh, my God. Have been copied into some things that you really don't want to know. About the couple that you're marrying. Like what? Well, this one may or might not have been a family member, but right down to the pre-wedding girl clean-up. The little trim-trim down below.

The landscaping gen. Being sorted out, not just for the bride, but for the bridesmaids at what time and with their preferences for front and back? No. No. Yes, indeed. That's hilarious.

Julie, you're a Brazilian. Jess is getting the buddy is. What was going on? Yes. Chen. I know. That's, I'm thinking I'm your celebrant love. That's.

This is not information that I need. But let's just add in. Yeah. My husband was the MC. Oh, I'm not sure. He was loving it. Okay. Good intel.

He could look at those brides mates quite the same way. Oh, my God. You don't want to know. I've heard of the bride. you know, paying for the makeup and the hair, maybe the outfits. Was the bride also covering the waxing for the bride trying? You hope so. That's a very good question because did they want a little Tasmania or Atlantic strip?

I choose to know. Like my triple X is expensive. Are you paying for that? Yeah, they are expensive. Oh, that's funny, Jen. That's great. Oh, wow. We go to Ali.

Allie, you were the brides. This was your wedding. It was my wedding. Yes. Good morning, guys. Good morning. All right. So you can look us in the eye, Allie, and say,

yeah, I was one. I believe I potentially was, yes. What's the most crazy thing you did? Oh, look, I don't think it was crazy. I just like to be organized. And I'm a little bit of a stress on myself. So I found if I had a list, I could give it to people and I could say, all right, I'm going to enjoy my day.

Don't bug me. Don't annoy me. This is what the plan is. And to be honest, it worked to treat. Everyone had a great time and I was not annoyed once. Now, when you say everyone had a great time, including the person, you've given you a hundred point dot to do list too, not that person. The ducker of the wedding.

They had a great time. I didn't have any complaints. It was a great night and everything run really smoothly. So I was stoked with it. Oh, there you go. See, I don't know if anyone's told Ali the truth. Did you, yeah, what was anything specific on your list like my sister, Ali, with, you know, timings? No, oh, look, there was timings.

I had like a, I wasn't super strict on it, but I did have timings be here at this point. We've got our pre-wedding dinner, the rehearsals the next day, this is a time to make-up. Like, I had a timing, but it wasn't strict in terms of take off your jacket. Lori, Lauren, even that's a Bridezilla pointing out another Bridezilla going, she's in a category all on her own. She is. And Glenn, on 131060, says here you worked in Hospo at weddings. Yes, I did heaps of high-end, like five-star weddings.

I worked at the Sherrick on the Gold Coast and stuff. And as you can imagine, there's more Bridezillas than you can. could ever imagine um but i met uh we had a woman once it was very she was a very very painful human being uh she spent she was like detailing down to the finest point and to the point where she had she walked down the aisle she had her vows and everything uh she came back to the bridal table she called me over and she said glen i can't get over the fact that while i was walking down the aisle two of the bows on two of the chairs were undone oh wow and it turns out it turns out that they were her children had undone them while she was walking down the aisle.

Oh, no. Wow. So she's trying to leave your bad review during her wedding and you've had to go, it was your bad bags. So she's walked down the aisle on that momentous moment of your life and she's held onto the fact that two bows are undone. That's what she was fond of this on. She held onto it for about an hour.

It would have been to be about an hour. How dare you, Glenn? How dare you? You've ruined my wedding. You ruined her day. Jess and Ducco. All thanks to the legends at Maccas because the Monopoly game is back. There's a one and three.

chance of winning over 49 million prizes every time you play. You've got the Azuzu MUX, $52,000 rent mortgage top up, and over 200,000 gift cards. We've got brands like Amazon, the Aconic, WebJet, David Jones, BP. So to play, simply get the My Maccas app today, get your code and place your order. It ends though, October 14, full terms. Visit McDonald's.com.com.com. Tucker, you know how in recent weeks there's been a lot of contention in the team, these two, Shagai and Babs, allegedly working so much harder than us,

We get to clock out hours early. Your Chalk always says about this job. You need length and girth in this league. That's right. Got to go work long, got to work hard, baby. Well. 40 hour weeks, isn't it? Yeah, minimum.

Well, duck on. I'm putting a bloody time sheet in. Because I was working overtime for this show yesterday. Yeah. Just out there, boots on the ground getting us new listeners. Oh, yeah. Well, you're doing some marketing, guerrilla marketing. Were you standing outside with the show?

Jess and Ducker sign, like waving on the side of the road. The next best thing, in the dental chair. Wait till I tell you about my experience. Oh, I hate the dentists, though. Yeah, but, no, no. We're on board now because I got one of them. Is it a spawn con? No, I paid.

My GMHBA. Free filling. Yeah, my GMHBA. And guys, use Jess 20 for a filling. What I'm saying is I got one. Yeah. But I want to tell you something she revealed to me about the judgment she's copped in the past for radio habit.

bets. Oh. Yeah, I'm going to tell you. And maybe a gap we can fill. Okay. I'll tell you on the other side of this one. Jess and Ducko. I made a new friend yesterday, Ducko.

I had an unbelievable connection with my dental hygienist. Said no one ever. Yeah, I know. You know how I feel about the dentist. I've shared this with you before. It's the people please are in me. I like going and being told. It's a goody two shoes.

It's the, oh, you're doing such a great job with your teeth. Because I genuinely do brush twice a day with an electric and floss every night. I've had too much dental work not to now take care of these pegs. And I'm often complimented. I'll get a sticker. I get a pad on the back and I get a swag of goodies. I just go in there asking for the happy gas. Like, you're too old.

I'm like, come on. You don't need it. We're doing a checkup. Just give it to me. Just give it to me. I've never had this lady before. Oh my God. And what a pleasure she was.

And we did that thing where she was asking me questions. And I wasn't responding because she had the tools and her fingers in my mouth. And when she had to take a minute, I said, sorry, can I just ask. Can you understand me? She goes, I can. I've been doing it long enough. Feel free to keep talking. So I tried to answer one of her questions after she restarted, I bit her finger.

Like I needed my teeth for maybe a tea sound and I bit her. I went, okay, are you sure you want me to chat whilst we're doing this? Was the dentist also that's working away? No, so this was just the clean appointment, not the dental checkup appointments. It was just her and I for the duration of the appointment. But we got on to, what do you do with yourself? I said, oh, I'm on breakfast radio and she was quite surprised. She'd never heard of us, didn't know, didn't know me, anything like that, but was very curious about the industry, which most people are, but she did drop, I'm sure you get it too.

People either say, oh, I don't know who you are and they feel the need to follow up with, oh, I only listen to Triple J. I'm like, no worries, because that's probably a different end of the spectrum to what we offer. So if you're a Triple J, that sort of quirky sort, like, you know, these sort of, this sort of music. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got an example for you. Oh, so this is Triple J. This is the Triple J, you know. We don't, this is not us.

Yeah, this is what you'll get. This is Babbs. This is Babs of staff? Yeah, yeah. But she revealed something, which I thought, geez, is there a gap we need to be tapping into Ducko? So this woman, I don't think she'll mind me revealing. She's in her 50s.

She's got a young son, 20s. When she talks about Triple J, if it does come up in conversation at home, he hit her with, oh, ma, you're so woke. listening to Triple J like it was an insult. And I went, hang on a minute, I thought that was a good thing.

I thought the young ones would use woke as a compliment, but he's hit her with, oh, you're so woke listening to Triple J. Because Triple J have gone all woke. Well, I'm confused that the 21-year-olds now think woke is a bad thing.

You're actually the wrong guy, Babs. And associating that, I was confused, too. I went, hang on, so the 21-year-old's coming to us because we're not particularly PC or woke. Yeah. Babs, over to you. I don't really understand that either. Yes.

Oh, wait, there's a gap here. Yeah. There's a gap if you are enjoying Team Jesus and the Gene Teases. Oh, yeah. On Triple J, maybe. I'm more of a King Gers and the Liz Whiz, but that's fine. Are you woke or not woke? I don't know, man.

No, I don't know why. I've never heard a 21-year-old accuse someone of being woke like it's a bad thing. Oh, yeah. And that being associated with radio habits. I said, well, is it flipping around the other way now? People are like, oh, woke is... It's gone too far. It's cyclical, you know.

I don't know. But she did say, well, now that we've met and we had a great time, we're having a laugh, particularly after she complimented on my lack of tartar and pluck. Tell her we've got Olivia Dean's nice to each other coming up and Sabrina Carpenter at least every hour. She did make a crack about, oh, you know, you never hear the same music twice. I went, well, bear with us. I guarantee a laugh. That's what I guarantee.

Jess and Ducco. It's been a wonderful show thus far. You missed any of it. Grab it on. Listener or wherever to get your podcasts. We've had some fantastic. Fantastic contributions, everyone, in with a chance to win a double pass to the NRL grand final. How good would that be?

That would be unreal plus accommodation. Let's not forget that bit. You might be thinking, I'm going to win and then have to spend all this money. No, no. We'll look after your bed for the night. We sought you out. I sought you out. Draw that on Friday. More chances tomorrow.

Been a great show, though. You missed any of it. As I say, get on the podcast because you might have missed Babs coming in with one of the great references to sexy bouquet. Oh, my God. She's done a lot for Rexona. Yeah. I wonder if we can get her some spawn con. Sexy bouquet deodoring is her...

We already got her a pillow. What more did she want? And that wasn't even for her birthday. That was just a Thursday. Just get rid of her flea-rimmed yellow pillow. Anyway, people are replying on the text line, 04-8-18-106-9 saying, yes, Babbs, sexy bouquet is the best.

Babs, try watermelon freeze. Ooh, are you going to try a new fragrance, Babs? Are you a one-cent woman? I'm a one-cent woman, so probably not. All right, well, take your watermelon freeze recommendation and put it in the bin. Bring your sexy deodorant in tomorrow. We'll have a little sniff.

All right. You're not going to be here. I'm doing the show from bar. I'll smell it through the Comrex. All right. I'll smell it through me Kodak. Do you know what we should do? No one knows what that means.

You're good. You've got a great nose. No sensitivity in nipples. It's like all your nipple sensitivity went to your nasal. I have a keen sense of smell. You know what we should do? Get a line up of armpits. Can you pick the sexy bouquet?

Oh, that's good. I need to smell it first and then I can pick... Sure. Yeah. And you guys just open your outfits up. You have the test? We get a bunch of girls in the office, and I'll just come around and sniff their armpits. Doesn't seem problematic.

Two, two things you have to pick. Who's got sexy bouquet and which one's shy guy? Oh, I like that. I like that. That could be a bit of fun. I'll wear the sexy bouquet. Oh, I can't. Even if a spanner in the world.

I'll go, that sexy bouquet and that sexy bouquet with shy guys. Like today, Ducko played with snakes. You can see it on the Instagram. Tomorrow he'll play with shy guy. Yeah, same thing. Yeah, you can check that video out on the Instagram. From one python to another. I know.

Yuck. I jump out of that seat. like an alley cat. Like, I get out of that thing pretty clear. You could, as soon as you're blindfolded, as soon as your fingers touch those scales, you knew. Yucky.

I should say as well, hits five-star fly away. Final chance to see New Zealand. Ed Sheeran in NZ. Don't forget, after the boarding land, you know, the boarding lounge opens in like a minute. Okay? So when you hear Ed Shearin, go, uh, go do that.

I've never heard you say, yucky. Yucky. Yucky. Oh, man, that was great. You know what's not yucky, Ed in NZ. And me driving, I'm going to drive to Barron today with our five-month-old daughter. Oh, you've got a big, I've got a big day. You've got a big day.

You've got a couple of days. All the best to your sister. Obviously, we're going to chat tomorrow, but you will be down the line on the conference. I'll be down the line tomorrow. Shaw goes on the Pots and Pants. Be gentle to it, would you? You know what?

If you want to win 10 grand, try tomorrow because he's going to be just all over the shop. He's on the tools. What do you mean? You can still win 10. The Alphabet questions don't change. Yeah, no. but you on the buttons feels feels like it throws everything out of whack.

It does, yeah. Thanks. Remember to smile when you talk show, guys. Smile when you talk. Yep. That sounded angry. That'd be great. You guys will do fantastic.

I'll be on tomorrow. We'll have heaps of fun. I might try and get my mum on the show tomorrow. I would love your mum. She will be peeking out. I wonder if she can carve out some time. You know what you need to do? Yeah.

Get on the run sheet and carve out 15 minutes. Kate Allen Duckett to join Jess and Ducko. Yeah, because if it's not in the run sheet, she might not deviate. She might not deviate. Yeah. Mom's got her own run sheet too. So try.

I'd love to chat to Kay. Yeah, we'll get Kate on tomorrow. Do you reckon I can get mum? Do you reckon I can get mum to do the rules to Alphabetux? She'd do better than shy guys. Yeah. Why don't we give her a crack? I'll give her a go at that.

Because you know who she has a permanent smile in her voice. She always sounds so pleasant and happy. She gets scared on the radio though. Oh, it's like my parents. I know, it's weird. I can get Chris Allen to do it. He's got that, you know, sexy dulc at times. He is fantastic.

You could be waving a hose in his face and he would be unflusted by it. Are you from his little? That's another shy guy. Reference. No, it's obviously an ode to his A Current Affair. Yeah, yeah. Investigative Journalism. Anyway, your family will be on. Yep, yeah. You will be down the line. Yep. But business as usual.

Boarding line is now officially open team. Very good. We best be off. Nothing yucky about that. We're out of here. We'll see you tomorrow. Bye-bye. Bye. I, to be honest, I got excited. I don't know. I was like, I was nervous. I got excited and I hung up. To be honest, I don't know. Jess and Ducko. That was the Jess and Ducko podcast.

Monopoly at Maca's is back. Play only in the out. Ends October 14. For full terms, visit McDonald's.com.com.