Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Grow up, its scrabble!

Episode Date: March 17, 2025

Jess bought in a trampoline to bounce us into the day, we ask whats your man doing wrong and you rice cookers have bought something to our attention that we need to comment on...Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Macca's delicious new Brekkie McRap is even more reason for a pre-work Macca's run. Jess and Darko! This is the Jess and Darko podcast. Hello everyone. Hello. School's in session. Good morning Mr Darko and God bless you. Did you do that? Yeah, we did the God bless you. Yeah, we went to Catholic primary school. Yeah, I did that too. Did you do God bless you? Yeah. I didn't go to a Catholic school. So how did you say good morning?

Just without the blessing. With the same little melody? No blessings. Yeah, same melody. Good morning, Mr. Guy. Feels like it just ends too abruptly with no God Bless You. It feels like you've added something. Yeah, yeah.

Isn't that funny? And may God bless you. You always have that same rhythm to it. Oh, wow. That was quite a flair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ours was quite staccato. And God bless you. Ah, yeah, right. same rhythm to it. Oh, wow. That was quite a flair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ours was quite staccato. And God bless you.

Ah, yeah, right. Hold on to mine. It's a big show. Big show. Big Tuesday. Your big Tuesday. You'll hear a bit of a content warning. You'll hear about how I had to shave my partner's downstairs.

That's right. Help her while she's heavily pregnant. She's doing God's work, baby. Have you ever done that before? No, never. All I wanted to know, though, downstairs. That's right. Help her while she's heavily pregnant. She's doing God's work, baby. Have you ever done that before? No, never. I wanted to know that. I couldn't say it was on air because it was getting too detailed, but I wanted to put it to the team for the podcast because we then had a big discussion about it.

Talk to me about lips, flaps. I don't. Have you ever been faced like really like close up to a vagina? No. The closest I've been is to my own with a mirror. Yeah, exactly. It's a degree of separation because it's the mirror. You know what I mean? I can't bend myself into a vagina recently. No, the closest I've been is to my own with a mirror. Yeah, exactly. And it's a degree of separation because it's the mirror. You know what I mean?

I can't bend myself into a pretzel. They're an interesting thing to look at really close. Now, I've been close to it plenty of times for other reasons, but you're not focusing on it. You're not eyeballing. This was just to eyeball it and not to do anything else, right? Do you know what? I've never asked, not even my husband.

Yeah. Your eyes open when you're doing that? No. Nah. Nah, usually not. You're in zone. You're in the zone feeling it out. Yeah, yeah. And then there're doing that? No. Nah. Nah. Usually not. Yeah. You're in zone. Yeah.

In the zone. Like a kiss. Feeling it out. Yeah. Yeah. And then there's that awkward, sometimes you open one eye, then they look at you, you look at them, you close it again. Like you're playing peek-a-boo.

Ah, jeez. Oops. I've been caught. I've been caught. They've caught me. They've caught me looking. Hello, eye. So that was me doing it.

You want to make sure, you know, sometimes, you know that game, I think we've played it before. Content warning! Content warning! You know the game, sometimes, I? I think we've played it before. Content warning! Content warning! You know the game sometimes? I think it was a trend for a bit. You'd stand in a row back to back to back, and you would have a piece of paper, like if Babs faces her back to me,

I'd put a piece of paper on her back. Yes. And I'd draw. Tracy, we have done that. And she has to guess what it is, and then maybe Shy Guy's behind me. And then we've all got to guess. And with the feelings, we all guess. The Whisper Game. Yeah, kind of. Yeah, yeah. I don't think you can say Chinese Whispers anymore. It's International we all get. The whisper game.

Yeah, kind of. Yeah, yeah. I don't think you can say Chinese whispers anymore. It's international whispers game. Yeah, yeah. Oh, man, you can say Chinese whispers. But what I'm saying is when you don't have a visual, you can go off course very easily.

Exactly. So that must be very difficult. Thank you. It's like, well, that's the butthole. It's tough. Oh, I've gone too low. I've slipped past the perineum, but I've gone. Imagine driving with your eyes closed.

You're going to go off course. Yeah, yeah. That could be very difficult. I've slipped past the perineum. Imagine driving with your eyes closed. You're going to go off course. That could be very difficult. At least that's the excuse. Well, and at least in that regard, you don't have a razor in your hand. Exactly. You know what I mean? This is my point, right? Because I was looking at it, like properly looking at it and taking it.

And I said like, geez, they're an interesting thing to look at. And Morgan's like, oh yeah, they're gross. Like vaginas I find unattractive. And I go, what do you reckon is uglier, a penis or a vagina? And she was adamant that the vaginas all look different. I said, well, penises are all very different shapes and sizes. And the thing about a dude is if you have a smaller one, it's universally more embarrassing.

Whereas in these vaginas, I don't look at a vagina and go, yours is more attractive than yours. Yeah, interesting. Have you been to Mona? Yes. The wall of vaginas. There are some. Have you been to Mona? Yes. The wall of the Chinas. There are some whack ones there. They're all different.

They are all beautiful in their own right. We all saw five together with our Pick Your Partner's Parts. We did. All different. And it was interesting because even though Pick Your Partner's Parts was front on, it's not like we were doing the mechanic skateboard to go underneath. From different angles. Yeah.

Also, different things can be revealed to you. What do you think is more unattractive of the two? To be honest, I think they're on par. Like, they're both, and we're not exposed to them often enough that it's not like second nature. So, I don't know. A good one's a good one. Yeah, I suppose. And an intense one is an intense one, you know?

Like an unpacked kebab. Well, that's, you know. Versus a Tati Taka. Well, yeah. You know, they're all very different. Is it because we might see more? Like out of urinal and stuff? Like we would just see.

Oh, you see. And also it's just like you guys aren't lining up at a bar. It's just a long thing. You know what I mean? I suppose. It's just like a sauce. Yeah, right there. But again, like titties. Titties up at him. Yeah. It's just a long thing. You know what I mean? I suppose. It's just like a sauce. Yeah, right there.

But again, like titties. Titties, very different. Yeah, totally true. Little shapes and sizes and colors. Breast shape, sizes and colors. Yeah, very different. You know? Yeah, yeah. The angle with which they.

But point out. Point out. It's all very unique. But girls don't seem, like girls would get naked in front of each other and not feel nervous or embarrassed or judgmental. Well, maybe they would. I don't know. Whereas guys, it's like.

Stereotypically speaking. Stereotypically speaking. Guys, it's like, well, if you have a smaller one, you know. Yeah. Yeah. But I also think it's your upbringing, isn't it? Maybe how liberal your parents were. My mom was always very, not prudish.

She just, there was never any topless behavior. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We were not allowed to barge into the bathroom. I still remember the first girlfriend who got fully naked in front of me and got into the shower. We were just getting ready for a night out and she went, I'm going to need to have a rinse and just took her clothes off and walked into the shower and I went, hello. Nice to meet you. Good afternoon, Michelle. It was such a, I would never in a million

years have done that. And then went, oh, some chicks are just cool with getting nude amongst their friends because it is the least sexual thing in the world. It's just truly practical. It's interesting, isn't it? And it did open up. And now since having a kid, I'm similar. I go, oh, well, the body is just... Speaking of opening up.

You know what I mean? It's a miraculous thing. Have you looked down since having a kid and does it look different? I have. Again, look down. We've got the mirror and all that. No, it doesn't. I've told you the hours preceding the birth preceding afterwards.

Holy moly. There was change. But that's it all snapped back. Unbelievable. God, it's impressive. The human body is incredible. The. There was change. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it all snapped back. Unbelievable. God, it's impressive. The human body is incredible. The female body in particular. Incredible.

Crazy scene. Because, yes, I thought I was irrevocably changed. And that would have been fine because what my body did to produce my child. But it snapped back. I'm like, God damn. Okay. I wonder if people don't snap back. Yeah, that would be interesting.

Like if the stretch is permanent. If you have more kids. Yeah, maybe. Maybe. Like my titties have changed. For sure, my boobies have changed since breastfeeding. That has irrevocably changed. Oh, yeah.

But downstairs, same. All the same. I'd be interested to see, depending which way your wife does go. Yeah. I look forward to circling back a month's time, six months' time. How are we going downstairs? I think I've decided I'm going to look down when the birth happens. You have to, bro. Just see what the birth happens. You have to, bro.

Just see what's going on. You have to. Yeah. Just to check it out. Just, yeah. Morgan's like, I don't think you should, but I know you will. I'm like, yeah, I will. It's going to be too exciting in the moment.

You'll want to see the moment. Are we taking selfies? As I said, Shaga's going to be there. We're all going to be hanging out. Absolutely. Four cross-stairing. Where did we land on an in-studio? Is that the wrong word?

In-room photographer. No, we're bringing lighting. Where have we landed this day? Do you want, is that the wrong word? In-room photographer. No, we're bringing lighting. Where have we landed? Do you want me to get the midwife to just take photos? They'll offer. And Morgan's like, no, I don't want that. And I was like, you don't want it at all? You don't want to see that?

She goes, no. It's one of those things. You can never look at them and delete them, but you can't recreate them if you don't have them in the first place. I know. Maybe I'll just say to the midwife, like, get a sneaky couple. She's already not doing a maternity shoot. I know.

Do you want to borrow Babs' DigiCam? Oh, can I have your Digi? I just accidentally forget to delete them. You're like, oh, fuck me. Holy shit. I've also got a disposable camera. Oh, you love that. I've got a couple of those.

One's got black and white film in it, too. Oh, how classy. Yeah, that'd be nice. Very. Or maybe, okay, Babs, actually, you can come. Oh, cool. Excellent. You're in the Yeah, okay. Mine's got black and white film in it too. Oh, how classy. Yeah, that'd be nice. Or maybe, okay, Babs, actually, you can come. Oh, cool. Excellent. You're in the studio too. Jess and Taco in the morning.

Welcome to Tuesday Team. And Jess is over there having a bounce. Yesterday I told you about my husband buying a mini tramp because he read somewhere, starting your day with a bounce is a good way to start your day. This is sounding fantastic. How's this going for all your phlegm in there? Do you know what?

It's not great for the braless titties or for the four kilos of hair that I've got sewn in my head. But I've got to tell you. It's hard on the joints, actually. I was on it before having a bounce. It feels fun. So we were talking about Angus on it before having a bounce. It feels fun. So we were talking about, Angus, starting today with a bounce, getting a mini-tramplane. We said, bring it in.

Bring it in. Firstly, I didn't think I could, or I was going to have to get you to swing by at 4.30 this morning because I couldn't fit it in my new mini. It's really hard watching you bouncing. It's making me dizzy. It's making me dizzy, yeah. But, Angus, I had a dinner last night and I said to Angus, can you try and work out geometry, Tetras, how to fit it in my new small car? Yeah.

And he texted me and said, it folds up, baby. Oh. I went, this thing's amazing. How good's that trailer? He bought it once to have it bounce to start his day. Should I be getting puffed? Yeah, maybe. I'm kidding.

So the world record for the longest bouncing session is five hours, two minutes, 37 seconds. Five hours. That's enough for me. That's a lot of bouncing. No. I actually found it quite, like, actually hard. Like, hard to, like, get yourself high.

Let me bring it over for you, Ducker. Yeah, get yourself. Let's just give me a bounce. Give me a bounce while we're here. All right, just walking it over. It's a nice feeler trampoline, trampopoline. You've got to get the high knees. Yeah, you're going to do, like, the workout version.

How do you feel? Can you feel your endorphins? I feel like a child. It is very childlike, isn't it? Yeah, it's really fun. I understand it doesn't sound great on air, but. Who's to say? How are you feeling?

It's a great, I think it is a great way to start the day. Sorry, I can't dance and talk. It's really hard to pronounce. How are your titties going? My titties are good. My berries, though. Pretty loose. Mate, treat those things with a bit of...

I know. Do you know, if anyone needs to start their day with a hit of endorphins... Shy guy. Missed it. We went to shy guy. It's my turn now. Oi, Babs, film this, because I really can't wait to see shy guy bouncing. I'm going to hit the ceiling.

Have you ever seen a stick insect bounce on a trampoline? Because you're about to. That's what's going to film this because I really can't wait to see Shy Guy bouncing. I'm going to hit the ceiling. Have you ever seen a stick insect bounce on a trampoline? Because you're about to. That's what's going to happen right now. And he's in position. We're going to film this. We're going to put this up. I understand this is visual. Look at him go.

This is fun. It's the most fun I've ever seen him have. This is more fun than he had at the lunch with people trying to dance with him. Oh, absolutely. Maybe we just needed a trampoline. It's a workout. On the knees? Yeah.

You're feeling the knees? Yeah, I was feeling the knees. Why? Try and go really high knees like they do in the tramp fitness or whatever. That's actually difficult. Yeah, hold on to the desk. Hold on to the desk. Give yourself a bit of support.

Bounce your knees. Go. High knees. What do you mean, bounce your knees? High knees. As in high knees. Bring your knees up. Kick them up.

Yeah. It looks like Shaga's making love to the trampoline. That's exactly what I was thinking too. Oh, wow. This is going to surprise us with endless amounts of fun. I don't think that's going back home. This now lives here. Can I ask how much it was?

Does he remember? That's a great question. I didn't even ask. Let me quickly go on the Rebel website. Yeah, it's like a feeler or whatever it is. Is it feeler? Feeler? Yeah, trampoline. Now, it's like a feeler or whatever it is. Is it feeler? Feeler. Yeah, trampoline.

Now, are we leaving that in the studio? We absolutely can because our mini trampoline, it's a different brand, but this is going up as $100. Okay. So maybe. Babs, feel free to have a bounce whenever you want to roll in. Everyone needs to start their day with a bounce. Geez, I'll tell you what, it gets you.

What I vote we do is at 8.55, 9 o'clock this morning, let's have a quick little look back at the morning. Has it been more joyful? Has it been more productive? Have we been better? Yeah, okay. Have we been sharper, smarter, funnier? Yes.

Then maybe let's compare it just to yesterday. The only difference would be having had a bounce to start our morning. Having a trampopoline. Yeah. So we'll do a one-day experiment and see if the benefits can be felt. Oh, I like that. I'm already feeling quite... Certainly, yeah, jolts you up, doesn't it?

Quite awake, that's for sure. I could see injuries happening on that thing, though. Jeez, doing a full class on that. I showed you the videos of the training fit yesterday, how hectic they go. It is hectic. You absolutely could get injured. It's got that little safety ring around it. That's not going to do much.

If you slipped off that, goodbye, ankle. Goodbye, ligaments. I wonder how high we could bounce my baby when she comes. Just like, see how she bounces. Don't drop it. Don't do that. I mean, it would be a soft landing. It would be a soft landing.

Maybe. You know what's funny? What's up, Lucia? When I mentioned yesterday that Luuchia was enjoying the bounce, got a handful of concerned rice cookers saying, children should not be on trampolines. It's bad for their joints. Like when they're too little,

compressing their spine and their joints and stuff. I went, oh crap, there's so much. I just put her through. I don't know. Won't drop my child then. Yeah. We'll wait until she gets kneecaps. We need at least five years old to be bouncing, I think.

Copy, copy. Not five years old. Well, I'm glad you brought it in. That's going to be lots of fun. That's going to be lots of fun all morning. I'm already feeling good. Whenever Shy Guy's grumpy, we just go, bounce! Bounce.

Yeah. Oh, if anyone gets a bit snappy or crabby, ah-ah, go have a bounce. Go have a bounce, Shy Man. Come back. You know, your mum used to say, if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say it at all. Yes. But before you snap off, you go have a bounce. Think about a bounce, Charmaine. Come back. You know your mum used to say, if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say it at all. Yes. But before you snap off, you go have a bounce, think about what you were going to say. Maybe we can work this song into our opener.

Yeah. Maybe we need three tramps. Oh, we all get a tramp. Because carting it around is a bit. Yeah, it's so true. It's a bit annoying. It's so true. And then Babs can have a little mini one out there for her desk.

Everyone gets a tram. Everyone gets a tram. Oh, brilliant. I'm glad you brought it in because it's set to be a jam-packed show team. Absolutely. And we need all the endorphins and dopamine we can get. Similar situation to yesterday. My baby registry, you're listening out for the crying baby and you're queued to call.

You hear that. You give us a call. You can win yourself. It's a fantastic prize. All thanks to Baxco Homes. A brand new coffee machine. That's right. It wasn't fantastic prize. All thanks to Baxco Homes. A brand new coffee machine. That's right. It wasn't right in front of me.

A brand new coffee machine. That's exactly it. So you listen out. That could happen any time. Now that we've started the show. Could be now. It could be now. It's not.

We could be bouncing. It could happen. Chances are we will be. You're going to interrupt my bounce with a baby crying. Well, you just don't know. So stick with us. And as soon as you hear it, 13, 10, 60, we've got the Kofod still today. Alpha Bucks is coming up for $10,000.

It's all happening. Lucky we've had a bounce. Because we need all the energy. We are ready. We're tingling and ready to go. Rip and tear. We'll play a song, Babs. You bounce in the song so you can fire up.

Take your bra off. It's a real experience. I'll bring it out for you. It's getting crazy on a Tuesday. Right now it's Dua Lipa kicking off a bit of these walls, guys. Oh, hello. This is just what I want for my Tuesday morning. Jess and Ducko.

Jess and Ducko. Let's discuss eyes, shall we? I would love to What are our eye colours? I'm blue, Shaga, you're blue Hazel and blue Actually, what are they? They're a bit hazely I think they're green, Dad

Because you've said hazel, I've been told mine is hazel Yours are brown Because they're not a deep brown I've been told What's the difference between hazelnut and brown? To me, brown looks kind of similar Like brown, in my mind, deep chocolatey brown Hazel, lighter

Like a hazelnut Yeah, I mean, yours are definitely I've been told they're different colours Yours are deeper than Shy Guys Shy Guys are a bit lighter Yes, that's why I think you're more green The snake. That makes sense.

It does. It all adds up now. And see, sweet Babs, brown. She's got deep chocolatey eyes. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, so we've all got kind of a slightly different shade of eye. Yes.

You know what we should do? Is it iridology? You know, the sort of hippy dippy practice of looking into the eye and ascertaining health and even I think it's a little bit. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Study of the iris. Study of the iris.

You can tell something about someone by their iris. Yeah, and it's literally the shade and the little flecks of vein. And you should get someone to come and dissect what's going on. Oh, my goodness. I'm reading a bit for your eye. Yeah. What a great way to describe it. Or do we do curtomere pigmentation?

What's that? Curtomere pigmentation is the surgical procedure where you can change your eye colour. Oh, wow. Permanently. The question is, are we unhappy with our eye colour to do a process like this? Who would want to? And I know blue is probably here. People want to go blue.

People always want to be blue. I had a girlfriend who really stuffed her eyes because she always wore coloured contacts. Not prescription to enhance her vision. Coloured contacts hurt. She had dark, dark eyes like Babs and she was wearing these glow-in-the-dark freaking costume things. Yeah. So bad. But she desperately wanted blue eyes.

Well, there's an ophthalmologist who's gone viral, obviously, due to telling people about this online. Dr. Brian Boxer-Walcher. What a name. Boxer-Walcher. It a name. Boxer-Waltcher. It's a cosmetic surgery for the eye. Essentially, if people can elect, he says, to have breast changes, facelift, Botox, why not change your eye color as well? This surgery changes the eye color of the eye by injecting pigment into the cornea.

Excuse me? They're taking a syringe of sorts into my eyeball? It's essentially eye tattooing. It permanently changes the cornea from clear to opaque and covers the natural iris colour. It'll cost you, to change one eye, $6,000. Pardon me, who's doing just one eye? Well, if you want two, $12,000.

Is that because he thinks $12,000 sounds like too much? He goes, I'll say six per eye. From $6,000, you can always get the from. Feels more affordable. I appreciate for our friends out there who maybe only have one eye. Perhaps they've lost an eye. You only want to pay for one. Don't be saying it's six grand per eye.

Would you ever rock the, you know how some dogs have one brown eye, one blue, and they look so cute? Huskies. Huskies quite commonly have one. Would you ever rock the one blue? That freaks me out. Do you know who did that? I've got a little book about David Bowie.

Apparently he was punched from a friend in primary school and it changed one eye. That's why he had that really distinctive one was brown and one was greeny blue. Right. Yes. So cheaper than that surgery. Just get your mate to punch you in the face. Apparently he starts the procedure by using advanced laser to create a circular-shaped tunnel in the cornea.

Then he made tools to extend the outer dimension channel. And he basically tattoos it on. He said the colour change is instant. There's not much issues with it. As in, like, there might be a bit of soreness and stuff for a few days after. But you don't lose any vision. And the colour options. There's a big colour palette.

Really? So you can get emerald green, evergreen don't lose any vision. And the color options, there's a big color palette. So you can get emerald green, evergreen, blue, Paris blue. Obviously, that's mine. But the most popular colors are honey gold, steel gray, and olive green. Steel. See, olive green, I think, is what Shy Guy has. Well, Google it. Olive green eyes. And then steel gray.

Would you want gray eyeballs? Do you know what? I reckon that's what Shy Guy has. Look. Don't you reckon? Olive green eyes. And they're still grey. Would you want grey eyeballs? Do you know what? I reckon that's what Shy Guy has. Look. Don't you reckon? Olive green. Oh, yeah. That's kind of what you're rocking.

Yeah, a bit like that. Steel grey feels very otherworldly. Yeah, it does feel a bit, doesn't it? And that's maybe what people want. Yeah. Also, I don't know. I just, any, like, I know people get laser on their eyes all the time. I've had a few friends who've done it, who've gone from, I cannot see without glasses to

I've had laser, I have better vision than everyone. Yes. But getting the laser on the eyeball wigs me out. The eyes are the windows to the soul. And, you know, often when my husband is at night, if I ask him for some sweet nothings, if I'm feeling a bit whatever, I'm like, tell me sweet nothings. He often talks about my eyes and how beautiful they are and blah, blah. You have to tell us what he says.

No. He always says eyes are involved in the compliments to make me feel good. Imagine knowing you've had eye surgery and your partner's going, oh, your beautiful steel grey eyes. Oh, your steel grey eyes. I didn't always have steel grey eyes. These are surgically enhanced. You know, it's just so part and parcel of who you are as a person.

It does feel weird. And also, like, do you not like your eyes that much that you really are desperately to get them changed? I know. Like, I understand if you have no boobs and you want boobs or if your face is getting I know, but you've got eyes. Yeah, you've got eyes. They work.

And as much as this guy saying, oh, it doesn't affect your vision, he's taken a syringe to your eyeball. Yeah. I don't know how much I'm trusting. Anyway, if you want it, six grand from $6,000. From $6,000. The gaming world is up in arms. Okay.

The board gaming world up in arms. One of, I'm going to say, board game royalty has caused controversy amongst its fans. Right. Scrabble. Oh, the OG. When we think of the royalty, I think Monopoly is up there. Okay. First Monopoly or Scrabble? I wonder. Now, that's a great question. It feels- Shy Guy Oh, the OG. When we think of the royalty, I think Monopoly is up there. What came first, Monopoly or Scrabble?

I wonder. Now that's a great question. It feels like Monopoly for me, but is it just more prolific with all the versions? Whereas Scrabble is sort of maintained. It's always stayed. Yeah, yeah. Even the board just seems like an old, dusty design with the colour scheme. Which board game came first?

Operation, I think, is in there. One of the greats. One of the OGs. It's definitely going to be out there. Scrabble was, on a quick Google, 1931. 1931, invented. Monopoly was 1903. Yeah, Monopoly.

Monopoly. Been around for a bit longer, but Scrabble been around a decent amount of time. Yeah. But it's caused controversy within its fan base. People are upping, quitting the game, setting their sets on fire. I don't know if they've gone that far, but metaphorically, they are angry because the HQ of Scrabble have come out and banned some words.

So obviously in Scrabble, you can challenge the person you're playing with saying, that's not a word. That's not on the dictionary. Maybe that's not how you spell it, or that's just not a real word. And then it's either like, you're playing the rules. Like, do you go into the Google? You can Google like, is this a word on Scrabble? And you use that one website because some are all different.

Absolutely. Are we doing, it's the Oxford Dictionary rules. Scrabble actually has an official website. It does. And on this official website, they have just recently removed around 400 words, Taco. Wow. They've done a big cull. And Scrabble fans are angry.

Someone said, it's hard to find anyone in the Scrabble community in favour of the ban. Someone else has said, words can't just be uninvented, people at Scrabble. It does feel weird to just ban words randomly when you already allowed them. Someone said playing these words in a private word game is very different to using them in any other context. And if you once said that they were allowed, maybe back in the day in 1931, 2025, you can't just decide that I don't get my triple word score. You can't flip-flop on the rules of Scrabble. They feel like Scrabble rulemakers feel like the biggest rulemakers of all.

The issue is, Ducko, these are the sort of words that were banned. You tell me why they're carrying on so much. Okay. Racial, sexuality and gender slurs. The people from Scrabble have come out and gone, guys, we're just trying to be more culturally relevant. They're coming at the times. We're trying to be a bit more sensitive.

Just because maybe it was once a bit more used, which is why it made it onto the list. Do we have any words in there or you can't say them? Yeah, I can't say any of these on radio. You can't say any? Any of the 400. Look, I don't have the list. You don't have the full 400 in front of you.

I don't have the full 400 in front of me. You didn't print that out for me, Dale. Babs didn't. But the fact. It says it doesn't exist yet. It is. Show me some of the words. I don it doesn't exist yet. It is... Show me some of the... I don't have any of it, to be honest.

But the person from Scrabble has said, we need to modernise. We cannot be allowing this to be in any sort of conversation, even around a private game of Scrabble in your own home. I see. Whereas, and it's funny, it's all dudes who have been listed. Daryl, he's up in arms. Daryl's not happy.

Just because it's a bad word doesn't mean I shouldn't be able to get my double word score when I play it privately with my partner. Can you still swear in Scrabble? Or could you ever? Well, that's a great question. I mean, when I play with my wife, she's the only person I ever play Scrabble with and the only person I ever will because I hate the game. We allow swear words.

You'll do it for her. Yeah, we allow swear words. Well, that's a great question. Officially, no. According to Hasbro. Like B-I-T-C-H. Is that in the dictionary? Is it able to be played?

Sure, but so is the F word. Is that in the dictionary? What about the C word? I don't know if that's in the dictionary. See, all of these words don't feel as... All of those words don't even feel as bad as the ones they're trying to ban. But the fact these people are going, I'm boycotting the game because I can't use insert swear here.

That was in the Cambridge dictionary. Oh, is it? Yeah. Oh, there you go. I go by the Cambridge famously. I always have. I just love the hill that these people are willing to die on. I know.

I know. You are genuinely a part. This guy is the co-compiler of a website called Official Scrabble Words, and he's going, I'm quitting the game. I'm done. Because you won't let me play a slur. Come on, man. Come on, man.

Come on, man. Grow up. Let's grab it. Turn it up, turn it up. Turn it up. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alphabugs on It's Alphabugs. Yeah, 30 seconds to answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. We have to take the first answer.

Can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, say pass. We'll come back, of course, if there is time. You know we're playing for $10,000. It's no secret. It's no surprise. So we go to the one and only. We go to Matt.

Hello, Matty. There you go, mate. Matt, Matt, Matt. Now, we've all started our day with a bounce on a mini trampoline this morning, Matt, and I've got to say, we're feeling pretty good. You know, energy is high, brain is firing. Have you done something this morning to make sure you're

firing ready for $10,000? I've had an extra shot of coffee. That's good. That's the equivalent. That's all we need. That's good. How about that? That's the equivalent. That'll do. That's all we need. That's all we need. Not everyone has access to a mini trampoline. Oh, no, they don't.

Extra shot, though. Why not? I love that for you, Matt. What do you want to spend $10,000 on when you win in 30 seconds time? Maybe an engagement ring for my girl. Oh! Yeah, okay. Maybe, though.

Not definitely. We love love. He could also head to the casino with the boys. You just never know with Matt. That's true. You don't know which way he's leaning. The supplementary plan. Maybe, though. Not definitely. We love love. He could also head to the casino with the boys. You just never know with Matt. That's true. You don't know which way he's leaning. The supplementary point. That is true.

If you don't get 10 out of 10, you do walk away with cash today, Matt. Hungy cash. Yeah, you do. I mean, you could put that towards the ring, but it feels like Matt could be, his arm could be twisted to go either way. The letter you're going to work with is the letter O. Wait a minute. Wait a minute, Matt. It just says here you've been with with is the letter O. Wait a minute. Wait a minute, Matt.

It just says here you've been with your partner for 20 years. Oh, damn. Is that true? Yeah, 20 years. We just had two little girls, though. It's about time I made an honest decision. She's waiting for that ring. She's waiting for that ring.

Life got in the way, Matt. You're like, we're clearly committed. We've now got two children. Okay. All right, Matty. That's even more motivation. Yeah. $10,000 to get you a nice little ring.

Did you catch the letter, Matt? O. O. Yeah. O. That's tough. Not the best, but I'll give it a crack. Hey, man, that's the cards you've been dealt,

and I'm sure you're going to run with it. All right, you ready? Yep. Okay, your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter O, we need you to name a brand. Olay. A hobby. Pass.

A flower. Pass. An flower. Pass. An adverb. Overt. A snack. Pass. A shape. Off you go.

A celebrity. You know what? I'm going to say that's the hardest quiz we've had of 2025. That was a tough quiz. Can I say, though? You know what? I'm going to say that's the hardest quiz we've had of 2025. Yeah. That was a tough quiz. Can I say, though, Matt coming out the gates with... I ring almost every day and I get the letter O. Oh.

Oh, mate. Can I say, though, coming out the gates with the brand Olay. I know. I must have had. Olay. I don't know how many dudes would have thought of Olay. I don't mean. I don't think that was actually a bad play.

Because a hobby, we're looking at origami. That's tough. A flower, the orchard. That's tough. An adverb, it throws everyone openly or outstandingly. A snack, oranges, Oreos. You could have said anything. You could have said anything.

Yeah, you got the shape. Look, you got yourself two. It was a tough carry. We got halfway through the quiz. You do get $100 to spend on anything you want. $100 cash, Matt. That's all yours. All right.

Thanks, guys. Sorry, Matty. Go read the T's and C's. Find out when you can play again. Yeah, I want to get you back on. Clearly. He wins every day. Oh, no.

He's a player. And Babs gives him all. She's so rude. Yeah, we'll put you back on to Babs. Okay, Matt. You can take it up with her. All right. Thank you.

Get your partner on of 20 years and go. Can't get a ring now. Hang on. Thanks, Babs. It's all Babs, okay, Matt, you can take it up with her. All right, thank you. Get your partner on of 20 years and go, can't get a ring now. Hang on. Honey, we can't do it. It's all Babs' fault. Jess and Ducco. Obviously, as we know, Morgan, my wife, who goes by the name of Migloo now is her pregnant name.

We call it to each other. She loves it too. She called it yesterday getting out of the car. She's like, Migloo needs help getting out. And I was like, I'm coming. And it's my own fault. I have seen Morgan a bunch of times. I've never confirmed it from her mouth.

Oh, you should. You're the only one who's running this narrative and we can't poke holes in it if you're saying she is cool with you calling her Migloo. Migloo the white whale. So she's obviously, geez, what are we now? 34? 35-ish? 35, I think. Anyway, a week's pregnant.

You're on weekly appointments. Yeah, we're on weekly appointments. You've got the go bag packed. Go bag's packed. It's sort of like that, okay, any time from now is go time, right? Which is very exciting. Is she now being conscientious of like not eating spicy food? Yep.

And you're careful when you- She's starting to eat dates. Is it dates or is it prunes? Oh, yeah, one of them. Something about the cervix? Yes. We're ripening. Anyway, let's not get into that.

I'm sorry. I didn't want to tell that. I'll tell another story about that area, but not that. There's a tea for that. I might have some left over. Yeah. All the fun things. I'm learning so much daily.

The nursery's all set up. But one thing that Morgan wanted to do, because it'd been a while, was clean up downstairs. And she goes, look, I'm going to need your help because I can't see over the belly. Because this has been a job she's just done. She's not had laser. She just takes care of it herself, usually. Yeah. Right.

So she normally just takes it with a razor. She never gets laser. Okay. She's clipper and razor. Anyway. She's analog. Yeah, she's old school. She's old school.

So she is standing up. How does she handle the ingrown hairs? Nah, she exfoliates. Yeah, Iipper and Razor. Anyway. She's analogue. Yeah, she's old school. She's old school. So she is standing. How does she handle the ingrown hairs? Nah, she exfoliates. Yeah, I think she's fine. I have an ass, but I think it seems all fine to me. So she gets. Never noticed. She never noticed.

So she's in front of a mirror, right? We've got a standing mirror and she's in front of that and she does a bit of it. And then she goes, I need your help. Migaloo calls me in to the room. She goes, I need your help. Migaloo calls me in to the room. She goes, I need your help. I need to get, like, right up and in there, but I can't reach or see. That's dangerous. You're dealing with a razor.

A razor. You can't be going in blind. Essentially, Jess, I was Jaws. Why are you Jaws? Migaloo Jaws Ocean Shark. Come on. Come on. Come on. Someone on. Come on.

Someone let me have that. I gave it to you. I don't know. I don't know if I agree with it, but I'm going to have it. Well done, Ducco. No. This is not niche at all. That's the perfect reference.

Where are we getting the tech to give me a button for that? Oh, we can't afford a panel. Okay, no. So explain to me. Has she got a leg cocked up on the bathtub? Okay, so this is what we had to do. No, no. So we're in front of a mirror in a spare room.

Is she cool with you talking about this? I'm pretty sure. Yeah, so this is what we had to do. No, no. So we're in front of a mirror in a spare room. Is she cool with you talking about this? I'm pretty sure. Yeah, I told her I was going to do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Honey. I know the line. And a ripe cervix is where it is. So we're not going to talk about that.

We don't talk about that. There's been so many things in this pregnancy. She's like, not allowed on air. I'm like, oh. Oh, she's getting in before. Deleting it from my notes. She sees you writing it down. So, okay, she's sitting there, and I come up with the razor,

and then I have to go underneath her. Has she just got both feet on the ground, or is she elevating? And then she puts one foot up on like a box, like a plastic container that we had there. Not the squatty potty. No, not the squatty potty. Oh, okay. So she puts that one foot up, and so then I'm underneath her

with one foot up. Are you on your back? Yeah, I'm sitting down underneath it. Like a mechanic. If this microphone is her, that's a hoo-ha. I'm here like this. You look like you're on the, you know, those skateboards, mechanics used to get under the car. I'm like that.

And essentially I'm like, but you know how nervous I am because it's a razor. Absolutely. And you're left-handed. I'm left-handed. I'm taking it to my favorite'm like, but you know how nervous I am because it's a razor. Absolutely. And you're left-handed. I'm left-handed. Like the dexterity of it. I'm taking it to my favorite part of her, you know? Is she a, I'm asking questions here, any sort of cream or aid or foam? Or are you going?

No, I was just, yeah, raw dog. Damn. Yeah. I didn't actually ask that. She is begging for ingrown hairs. I know. But like she was telling me which way to go and how to do it and stuff like that. Oh, go against the grain?

Yes. She goes, I don't want you to do heaps because I don't trust you that much. And personally, I didn't trust myself that much. Oh, she doesn't want the triple A. No. She just wants a little tidy up. Just a quick little tidy up. Let's just do it.

Let's just do the maintenance while we can. So when your girl pushes out in four weeks, she's got a bit of a clear thorough through. We're not getting through the weeds. She doesn't need to come out with her own little bushwhacker. She's not coming out as Cousin It, you know? Where's the kid? Hold on, is she in here anywhere? Jesus.

Gee, she's come out with a lot of hair. Oh, no, that's not her. Is this the Amazon? What are we in here right now? Call me Indiana Jones. The Temple of Doom. Oh, man. Anyway, so did you tidy it up?

Yeah, I tidied it up. And I had no cuts. No cuts. Good on you. I'm proud of you. Put that on your resume. Shaves, Lady Cave. All I could think of was that was in the Temple of Doom

when he grabs the skull. Causey Doom. I'm sorry, that was niche. Yeah, play the freaking thing now! Jess and Ducco. Welcome to Tuesday. We have just been, I don't want to say injuring ourselves, but my spine is compressed right now.

You might be injured. Hey, get Calvin Harris ready. Oh, yeah. We need to set the tone. We have been. How will I know that we're talking about a mini trampoline unless you play Calvin Harris? You will now.

We've been bouncing. When did she say bounce? I'll try another part of it. I'll just play the whole song until it's over. Love that. We are talking about the minutes. Here we go. they bounce. And another part of it. I'll just play the whole song until it's over. Love that. Yeah. We are talking about the minutes. Bounce.

Here we go. Bounce. Yeah. Thank you, Khalees. Thank you, Calvin. We are talking about the mini trampoline, and by extension, we want to open it up to the rice cookers, that chance for the co-fod, getting both 13, 10, 60.

What was the craze you put everything behind, and how short-lived was it? I shared with you yesterday that my little girl is trying to jump. She appears to be trying to launch herself into the air, but is not actually leaving the ground. It's very sweet. And Angus went, I've got something that might be able to help, and pulled out a mini trampoline.

And I went, God, what craze was I in that I bought that thing? Because it just fits my wheelhouse. And Angus said, no, God, what craze was I in that I bought that thing? Because it just fits my wheelhouse. And Angus said, no, no, this one was actually me because he read on the internet that starting your day with a bounce is great for your body. It's good for the mind. It's good for the soul. I've never seen this guy bounce on the trampoline. Granted, I'm not there in the mornings, obviously. And he said, yeah, it didn't last too much longer than two days because it hurt my brain. Yeah, and it's actually quite tough on the knees.

We've established today, bouncing on this trampoline, there's videos on Instagram at Jess and Ducker. You can see the stories. Granted, we are trying to do tricks. We are. Oh, we're doing sick tricks. But even just the simple bounce. My lower back is just, I tried to drop on it, like sit down on it,

and I've compressed my spine. You were expecting it to be able to launch you back up into a standing position. Nope. You just hit the deck. Stone cold sea bossing that thing. It's quite taut. Yeah, it is. It's quite taut.

I don't know what these things are actually for. Like, what are they marketed for mini trampolines? Tramp fitness, I guess. Maybe it is tramp fitness, but they's not a butt-focused exercise. It is just you bounce up and down, get your knees up, which Shy Guy gave us a great demo of earlier this morning. Yes. But we wanted to know, so for my husband, it lasted less than a week.

He had two goes at this thing, bouncing to start his day before he realised, not for me. This ain't it. And now I've brought it into the studio. So we wanted to know how short-lived was the craze in your life? Maybe you sunk a bit of money into the gear. One of the girlfriends I caught up with last night, I was saying her partner has just decided he will be a golfer.

Had never shown. Welcome to the journey to greatness. And I went, did he just turn 30? It seemed to be one of those things. You'll never achieve it. She goes, he's never shown any interest in golf, but apparently did it for a box or with some boys and went, maybe I do like this.

Is this just drinking alcohol in the woods with your friends? In a nicely landscaped area. But he's come home and said, oh, yeah, bought myself a bit of gear. A thousand dollars he has dropped on, I guess, some clubs maybe. Maybe some of the clothes. That's not even that much on clubs. You could do some damage. She was pretty shocked for someone who has tried at once to drop that amount of money.

You want to commit now. That she is now going, you better commit to this freaking thing. It better not be just a blip on the radar that you give up in a week. 100%. Yes. So $1,310. 60, what was short-lived? What was the craze you had? Did you buy like the Adbuster 3000?

I'm going to start my fitness journey at home. Yeah. Absolutely. Try to do something like that. Someone else was sharing that their husband has just got into breeding snakes. That's disgusting. So had to buy, as you can imagine, all the equipment, the tanks, the heating lamps, this and that.

I'm going, that is not a craze I want to see anyone pick up on. I can't. Now they've got upwards of 80 snakes in their backyard in a shed. I'm like, are you joking? What happens when they inevitably get out? Which they will. 100%. Snakes always find their way out.

There's no lid on that thing. There's no lid on that. If you have to feed a pet live dinner, I would be rethinking if that's the craze you want to jump on board. Have you ever jumped in any crazes, shy guy? No, not really. You don't strike me as a crazes guy. Yeah. You don't have hobbies.

No. No. I mean, I bought my drone. That was a big waste of money. Oh, yeah, true. You did get the drone. You got your drone license? I don't need a license.

It's a little drone. So you never used it. It was still like two grand. I think I've used it four times. So that's per use, not very financially. No, 500 per use. That's exactly what we're looking for. How short-lived was the craze?

By extension, how much money did you drop? It's only about 15 minutes of fun. Yeah. 15 minutes of fun. Yeah, there you go. How short-lived was the craze? And by extension, did you sink some money into it and then go, maybe this isn't for me?

I have brought in the mini trampoline that my husband bought after reading online that starting your day with a bounce was good for the mind, body and spirit. I've never heard or seen that, but he's just seen it somewhere and gone, you know what? That's me. That's my life hack. I thought I bought it and forgot about it because that just fits my MO.

I couldn't believe Angus Harper was the one to put some money behind this. I brought it into the studio and now we're all on the bounce craze. We've had a great morning so far. We've been bouncing a lot. My spine is a bit sore from trying to do tricks. You tried to do tricks. Don't sit on it. But for Angus, the craze lasted two bounces and he gave up on the new tramp.

He's a two bounce specialist famously. Two bounce and done. Two bounce Bob. bounces, and he gave up on the new tramp. He's a two-bounce specialist, famously. Two bounce and done. Two bounce Bob. Yeah, two bounce Bob. We call him, famously. But someone texts through. Melissa texts through. I love this.

She goes, hey, guys, I grew up with horses, and my friend's daughter wanted to do pony club. So she purchased her a $10,000 horse. We know horses aren't cheap, but that. And it's an expensive hobby. That feels expensive. All the gear, around $2,000 worth. Her daughter went to one pony club event and said, nah, I don't like it.

I'm done. Jeez. Never rode the horse again. You'd want to borrow a few horses before you just jumped into buying and going to a pony club. I love wanting to provide your daughter with everything she got her heart set on. Yeah. But surely when it's something around horses, you go, let's hire it.

Let's join a club. Let's do that. Before we buy our own horse. Before we just jump straight into it. Yeah. We go to Gabby on 131060. Gabby, how short-lived was the craze? Hey, so my partner bought a $6,500 scooter.

The fastest on the market goes 110 k's an hour. Three days later, I know, he broke his elbow so badly they couldn't find all of it. Missed out on three months of work. Wow. You're not getting back on the scooter after that, I imagine. That's going to start collecting dust. A fast scooter is, yeah, it sounds fun in theory, but geez. You do one Europe trip, you know, all the e-scooters are really big overseas.

You think, I could bring this into my everyday life. Nah, not practical here. Jodie on 131060. Jodie, how short-lived is your craze? Well, mine wasn't expensive. I think we went to a garage sale. It was over 10 years ago, and my husband found a compound bow and arrows. That sounds so fun.

Yeah, let's get that and I'll, you know, learn how to use and everything. It's okay, not a problem. It has honestly sat in our garage for the past 10 years in its bag or whatever in case, like, we might be attacked by zombies or something. You know, if there's a zombie apocalypse, Jodie, you and your partner are set. He's never used them. He doesn't have any aiming, but geez.

Have you done spring cleaning or trying to tidy up and go, should we get rid of these? He goes, nah, nah, nah. I still might try it. Yes, I've done that so many times, but I'm not safe in a zombie apocalypse. He is. He is, exactly. You know what?

Flying bow and arrow sounds fun. Like, I want that. Bow and arrow. I want to go shoot trees and stuff. Oh, drink is so hard. You know, you do it at, like, your orienteering camps or whatever in school. You go, this is actually really tough. It's really tough.

Oh, thank you, Jodie. And Fiona, good morning to you. Good morning. How short-lived was the craze? It was about eight months. Eight months? Okay. What was it?

Belly dancing. Oh, get it, sis. Here we go. Oh, I love this. Here we go. What inspired you to pick up belly dancing? Another friend of mine was doing it, and she goes, you'd be really good at it.

No, I wasn't. I love that. I've seen you wiggle your hips, Fiona. Come to a belly dancing class. We'll get you the little jingly skirt and all that. Yeah, we'll do that. I've seen you wiggle your hips, Fiona. Come to a belly dancing class. We'll get you the little jingly skirt and all that. Yeah, we'll do that. You've got a shimmy, shimmy shape. I've been to those restaurants where they have the belly dancers

that come around every now and then and then you get up and you have to do a few. Yes. The way those women can manipulate their hips, it's actually unbelievable. So did you go to the class, Fiona, and then realise you were not good at it? No, no. I went to classes and we even done a little exhibition at our local RSL.

Oh, there you go, Fiona. That's amazing. Oh, what was your team name? Surely you had something fun. I thought I was so good, but no. Looking back now, I'm like, shocking. I love that. It's one of those things maybe in the moment you feel really sexy

and empowered, Fiona, but then you see a video of yourself, you go, oh, my God. Fiona's invited her family. They're like, what? Jess and Daco. Year of the Song. Shy Guy has told us the theme for this week's Year of the Song is space-related, and it assures us there is a very good reason.

Because Katy Perry is going on the next Blue Origin rocket, which is owned by Jeff Bezos from Amazon, in an all-female crew. Katy Perry, Gayle King, who does a CBS morning, which is like the Today Show in America. Gayle King, yes. Is that Oprah's bestie? I think so, yeah. Yeah, Gayle King. Is that Oprah's bestie? I think so, yeah. Yeah, yeah?

I think so. Yep. And then some other NASA scientists are also going to go up, and Jeff Bezos' wife, who is also a filmmaker. Oh, rock on. That's a space theme. Song one, Katy Perry, extraterrestrial. Oh, surely they've got this on repeat as the rocket blasts off.

Even Firework, because you're shooting up. Oh, you're shooting up. I love that. I don't know if I could listen to this on repeat. No, I don't think so. Extraterrestrial. Was this the same era as Firework? Was this the same album?

Surely it's later. Not Raw. Ah, not Raw. Teenage Dream. I have no idea. Ooh, Teenage Dream. I'm going to take a dirty little stab at this. Yeah, me too. Is no idea. Ooh, Teenage Dream. I'm going to take a dirty little stab at this. Yeah, me too.

Is it it? Oh, we've gone into similar areas. 2015 for Jess, 2013 for Ducko. The correct answer, 2010. Ooh. No dice, no points. Jeez, Katie's been around for a long time. Hasn't she?

Song two, the space-themed year of the songs, Elton John, Rocketman. Oh. What a track. Song two, the space-themed year of the songs, Elton John, Rocketman. Oh. Right. What a track. Still stand by. One of the greatest things I've ever seen live. Rocketman, the title of the biopic made about him, of course, with Taron Egerton.

Yes. Fun fact, you know, Elton John wanted Taron Egerton to play him in that movie. After hearing him sing in the animated movie Sing, he was a gorilla, Taron Egerton to play him in that movie. After hearing him sing in the animated movie Sing, he was a gorilla, Taron Egerton, and he sang an Elton John song. Elton saw it and went, God, that guy can do a really good me. You should be me. So good. I'm still standing.

Taron Egerton did it. Elton went, cast that guy. Rocket man. I have no idea on years and dates for Elton. It's got to be ages. It was a while ago. It's a hot minute. It's got to be ages. It was a while ago. It's a hot minute again.

It's got to be. Yeah. Jess is in. Oh, I've gone the exact same. Oh. Okay. 88 for Jaco. Two fat ladies. 86 for Jess.

The correct answer is 72. Oh, we were off by a well away. 72. God, that has stood the test of time. Hasn't it? All his music has. Let's see how he goes from three. Nicki!

Nicki Minaj. Nicki Minaj. Star shit. One of the great tunes. Was this her first sort of entry into the pop world? I'll say this is Forgotten Friday banger. Not forgotten. I would vote for it, man.

Not forgotten. Just because it's a banger. We never play it. Do we? I'm afraid of it. It's just R&B, isn't it? Because we? I'm a bit afraid of it. Is this R&B? Because up until this point, I think we'd pigeonholed Nikki as she's just a rapper. Yeah, yeah.

Whereas this. When did Starships come out? This is in the O's, but is it like the 10s or the 12s? It's got to be the 10s, surely. I think so. It has that 10 production. Like when it has that bad drop, like that David Guetta-esque. I know it was before Anaconda.

Ah, ah, ah. Yeah. Okay. I reckon every, like, year six group of girls had a dance to this. Absolutely. Absolutely. It was a lead single from her second studio album. All right, I mean.

That gives you a hint. Oh, I was going to go a bit later than that. Ooh. 2011 for Ducker, 2014 for Jess. The correct answer is 2012. Yay! Go on! Close as we're going on.

Okay, we're on the board. We're on the board. Oh, Europe. It's a fucking account. One of the greatest. It's actually about space. Is it? Yeah.

It's just for motivational things, running, bit of rocky training. Gosh. This is eights as well. This has got to be the eighties. This is. Surely. I can hear the big hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I might. Yeah, yeah. This just reminds me. Is it early eighties? I'm seeing shoulder pads. Okay, I'm in. I'm going for it. Oh, I've got it. 86 going for it. Oh, I'm in.

86 for Ducker. 83 for Jess. The correct answer is 86. Hey! Hello, space boy. Final countdown time. I'm going to call you Astro Boy from now on. Ducker's one of them.

For fun, what year do you think Coldplay's A Sky Full of Stars came out? This was the exit song for my husband and I at our wedding. Was it? Yes. But you hate Coldplay. I hate Coldplay, but I love my husband. And when he said, can we have one Coldplay, I went, of course, darling.

So this is what we left to the Sparklers. This is when Coldplay started getting average. How dare you? This is the only one I kind of don't mind. I don't mind this song. I don't mind this song. Some of the other ones, I'm like, yeah. But this is, so it's after Viva La Vida.

It's the album after that. I'm pretty sure. So this would have to be. I mean, I've got no idea. Sky Full of Stars would have to be like. Angus, text me. You should know this. 20.

Oh. Okay, I'm in. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Okay, 2019 for Ducker, I'm in. Okay, 2019 for Ducco, 2013 for Jess. The correct answer is 2014. Hey! Jess gets the point, but Ducco already... I just should be so proud of you. He would be proud.

It's because I was fuelled by love. Fuelled by love. But no, congratulations, Astro Boy. You've won that. You've won the space... Call me Jimmy Neutron. Jess and Ducco. I've lost the skill, Ducko.

I don't know when it happened. I don't know if it was since becoming a parent and the bar hopping life is not in my repertoire as much as it used to be, you know, being the giant piss head that I am. Went out over the weekend for a girlfriend's birthday and we went to a bar. And obviously her birthday, so as soon as we arrived I went, right, sis, what are you drinking?

I'll get first round on me. And I found myself standing at the bar. It was not the busiest place in the world. It was about six o'clock so it was still probably a bit early. But I found myself standing there and I've lost the art of pushing in. And I think that's integral when you're standing at a busy bar, right? You've got to get yourself in there. I've gotten so used to deli counters and places with orderly queues where you get a number.

No one at the deli counter takes a counter. You just roll into the deli. Are you joking? You never take a counter. You're in the delis I go to, you get the counters on. When you go to the Woolies once, I have the deli counter takes a counter. You just roll into the deli. Are you joking? You never take a counter. You go to the delis I go to, you get the counters off. When you go to the Woolies once, they have the deli tickets there. You just stand there. No one takes one anymore. No disrespect. They don't even read it. No disrespect.

I do my shops at Woolies. I do not buy from those delis. Must be nice. I don't. The salami that's already... I need my salami cut fresh. I don't want salami that's been sitting there cut for how... I don't. The other half of her sugar. The salami that's already. I need my salami cut fresh. I don't want salami that's been sitting there cut for how,

I don't know how long. But no, I realize I'm standing there and no one was serving me. And people are not necessarily pushing in because it wasn't even that busy. But I lost the art of making eye contact. And no one was going, who's next? It's literally. A busy bar. Who's just standing in front of them at the time they look up after they finish that cocktail.

All right, what would you like, sir? And I go, I can't get my friend a margarita because no one's looking at me. There's always an art to edging into the side of the bar and then being the person just sort of sneaks in and has, you know, no shame and just goes, yeah, I'll take that. And I was watching some other women around me in particular. They have a little tactic. They stand almost side on. So that way the tiniest gap could open up and they just wedge themselves in because obviously that's a smaller angle to fit in.

And then they front up to the bar. I'm like, I've lost all these skills. My friend ended up coming over being like, it's been 10 minutes. Where's my freaking margarita? Were you just politely standing there like two, three deep in the queue, not moving? Because then someone else appeared who was joining the party. So we're having a chat and I'm looking at her and I go, oh, wait a minute. I can't look at you and talk.

We've got to be making eyes for when the bartender is free and at least we can get maybe some eye contact happening. I can't believe how hard it was to get a freaking drink. I like to think that when you get to the front, there's always someone who's there before you and they point, you just point the person next to you, go there first, and then the good karma comes to you. But being two or three deep in the queue, yeah, you just need to go for it.

And everyone, when you start having been waiting yourself five, six minutes, everyone goes, all social etiquette out the window, I'm just going to order my drink. I find blokes, they're probably just like, just quickly, mate. I'm just getting a schooner of two-e's or whatever. Whereas maybe stereotypically, we're getting cocktails, this and that. They take longer. They think, I'll be quicker than you anyway.

But oh my God, I found it so hard to get a drink. I went, all right, this is why we only go to restaurants for table service. You even told me the other day, you don't like bars. You don't like sitting in a bar and drinking. It's not your thing. My issue is I can't just sit down and knock back drink after drink. I just get tired. I need a dance floor.

I need to boogie. Otherwise, I just start yawning and I need to remove myself. Sitting around a bar with Jess watching sports is not a thing. It's not a thing. No, no, no. Even if the lacrosse championships are on. I'm a big fan of lacrosse. Huge. I don't think I could sit there and just watch any sort of game.

No. So it's really, it really does bring a firm, this is not for me. Have you ever just gone to a pub with friends and just gone, we're just pulling up here, not to eat or even people can eat, you know. As soon as I even walk past a pub, I get a hankering for either a chicken Caesar or a schnitzel. I can't just sit there and not order at least a smattering of a few things. So, yeah, no, it's just not for me.

It was a real moment of this is not my scene anymore. I can't do it. I've aged out of bar culture. Oh, no. Don't do that to yourself. It's too hard. We need deli counters at bars. Could you imagine that? Could you imagine that? 67? Yes, me. That's yourself. It's too hard. We need deli counters at bars. Could you imagine that?

Could you imagine that? 67? Yes, me. That's me. That's me. That's why they invented the things for the table where you can order at your table. Except then half the time they don't work or they ask you for a tip, which you know is me. They sometimes don't do alcohol on those.

Sometimes they don't do alcohol. Or you order it and it never comes. And you're like, well, I would have been better going to the bar and just grabbing my spoon. And trying to push it. 100%. Exactly. Exactly. We need to work on that because for people schooner. And trying to push it. 100%. Exactly. We need to work on that because for people like me, you just never get served. It's too hard.

Deli cancer bars would be funny. I would love that. 68. I would love that. 68. Yeah, can I have 200 grams of the prosciutto and a margarita, please? Oh, you're a deli meat as well. I mean, if we're going to do it, we may as well go all the way.

Hey, we need to buy our fucks. Yes, we do. We've got $10,000 to give away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe you want to shout all your friends at the next bar you go to. Why not? Why not? $13,000, $10,000.

$10,000. We had our hardest quiz of the year at 6.30. Yeah. It was O and it was a tough carry. It was a tough carry. So what have we... Oh, no. You want to say where we're going?

Nah. Nah? Nah? Look, my point is it won't be as hard. Surely it can't be. Surely. Surely. On the back end of the alphabet.

Oh, that's tough. That's still not great. Call us. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alphabucks on Hint. Yeah, 30 seconds to answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. Have to take your first answer.

Can't use the same answer twice. If you're unsure of the question, say pass. We come back if there's time. We're playing for $10,000. Our player today is Mel. Hello, Mel. Morning, morning. How are we, team?

Fantastic, Mel. We are ready to give you $10,000 if you are ready to receive. Yay or nay? Oh, yay, girl. Yay, Mel. We are ready to give you $10,000 if you are ready to receive. Yay or nay? Oh, yay, girl. Yay, girl. Take it in, Mel. What do you want to spend $10,000 on? It's my husband's birthday tomorrow,

so I thought I might get him a voucher to Bunnings. Oh, jeez. Will that just get him going? Is he a big Bunnings person? Oh, he loves it, but every year he nags me for a Bunnings voucher and I finally bought him one yesterday, but I'm like, hey, I can trade him an extra $100. Oh, I love that. Of the $10,000,

we can supercharge Mel's husband's gift by another $100. Yeah, that'd be nice. And then Mel can take herself shopping, maybe. Yeah, Bunnings voucher. 100%. I love this for you. It's just their happy place, isn't it? Some of the boys. I swear to God, Angus just walks the aisles. I mean, what did you go for?

He went, I don't know if we needed anything, but maybe something would speak to me. That's what we do. Yeah. All right. The letter you're going to work with today, Mel, as Shy Guy said, back end of the alphabet. You've got W. Right. I'll work it.

W for wood. You'd find that in bunnies. I'm no expert. I reckon that's aisle 82. Think you would. The wood. Mel, you ready to rock? We'll give it a best shot.

Come on, Mel. That's all we can ask. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter W. We need you to name a country. Park. A brand. Waterloo.

A condiment. Worcestershire. A brand. Waterloo. A condiment. Worcestershire. A car part. Pass. A flower. Waterloo. A musical artist. Y2K.

A body part. Nothing. Pass. An accessory. Pass. A piece of furniture. I fail at Nothing. Pass. An accessory. Pass. A piece of furniture. I fail at this. Pass.

A boy's name. William. A country. We got ourselves. I fail at this midway. We're still time on the clock. Don't talk during the quiz, Mel. I think with Y2K, she knew she was doomed.

That's it. Yeah, Y2K got you there. Will Smith got it. Yeah. Well, there it is. We'll give it. You got yourself four. There was a few passes in there.

A country, Wales, a car part, a wheel, a windscreen wire part, a musical artist, Will.i.am, Wiz Khalifa, or yes, Will Smith, a body part, waist, an accessory, a wig or a wallet or a watch, and a piece of furniture. It could have been the old work bench. Oh, look at me go. Sex bit. Oh, yeah, yeah.

That's what I call my boudoir, Mel, the old work bench. That's where all the work gets done. Yeah, you have the same reaction as my wife. Oh, look, we've got to love that dad joke. Amen, amen. Hey, you're not going away empty handed. love that dad joke. Amen, amen. Hey, you're not going away empty-handed. No, $100. You get cash.

$100 cash for playing, even though you played poorly. Thank you. So if you want to use that to boost that Bunnings voucher, you can. Otherwise, buy yourself something pretty, Mel. Oh, it'll be all just like buying myself something pretty. That was embarrassing. It's harder when you come on air, isn't it?

Yes. Oh, 100%, but we gave it a crack. That's all we It's harder when you come on air, isn't it? Yes. Oh, 100%. But we gave it a crack. That's all we can ask. Thanks for playing, Mel. Good to chat. Thanks, guys. Bye. Jess and Ducco. So a woman has sparked debate online over the correct way to pour detergent into the washing machine after she discovered that her man didn't pour it into the, like, the actual

tray in the washing machine. Like the dispenser tray. He just chucks it straight in on top of the clothes. And she was outraged at this. However, it did spark a debate online where people are saying, well, this is what I do. Do you know what's funny? I want to judge him as well because Westinghouse, LG, Miele, they are the washing machine experts.

If they have designed the tray for which you to load your Omo, we should do what they do. Having said that, when I think about the dishwasher. I just chuck it in now. I just chuck it in. Yeah. Do you do that? So why am I doing the wash?

Mind blowing that you can do that. Yeah, I know, right? We bought these eco-friendly sheets. Yep. Yep. For the washing machine? No, no. For the dishwasher.

So I just chuck it in because otherwise I watched my husband having to fold it up like origami to fit in the little dispenser tray. I chucked the little squares in for the dishwasher just straight in. So it would stand to reason, why can't you do that for your clothes? You absolutely can. It does feel weird, though, if you are a liquid. Do you know if this was liquid or powder? This was liquid.

See, that feels weird because some of the liquids are blue. Yeah. So pouring that directly on, if you're doing a load of white, that feels weird. Whereas powder feels a bit more normal. Powder feels more normal, but at the end of the day, it's getting on the clothes anyway. We use the sheets for a little while on the washing machine, but you need like four or five

to actually clean it. My gym gear stinks. Your gym gear and the blood and grass stains. Just from all that stuff I'm doing. All that butchering I'm doing of animals in the wilderness. You need. You guys should see me.

You need. You're doing a whole thing of nappy sand per load. Yeah. Hell yeah. But 13, 10, 60, what's your man doing wrong? You know famously my wife refuses to do laundry with me. Well, I don't split my lights or darks. We do separate baskets.

I don't use pegs either. I hate pegs. I think pegs are annoying. So I just let them. And you know what? If it's a hot day and my clothes blow onto the ground from the clothesline, they're still going to dry. They're still going to dry. I'll tell you how much.

Who cares that creepy crawlies have gone all over them? Maybe a little bit of dirt. Whatever. That's all good. I'll shake them off. You're just going to wear them and dirty them again. Exactly. My daughter pinched some knickers off the lawn the other day and was running down the

alleyway with them. Came back inside. She takes after you, doesn't she? I went to my undies. He went, other day and was running down the alleyway with them and came back inside. She takes after you, doesn't she? What happened to my undies? He went, I think they're halfway down the alleyway. Sick, like sis. Jam on her head too. It runs in the family with you guys.

You know, they just monkey see, monkey do these kids. It really is. Is your man, is he doing anything apart from putting a leaf blower into the toilet? Yeah, that was a mistake. I've mentioned this to you before and anyone who is doing this, whether you be male, female, whoever, he'll do the washing up and leave the sink full of that dirty water to end. I appreciate, don't get me wrong, thank you for tidying up, thank you for doing the washing. Drain

the freaking sink once you're done. His argument is, oh, but you're going to have a cup of tea later on, then I'll wash it in that. No. It's now just filthy dirt water. Empty the freaking sink. Yeah. Pull that plug out.

Yeah. Please. I established the other day that Morgan doesn't know how to soak things. Like, she's not an experienced soaker like I am. Like, any guy there will tell you how good to soak. Not to be sexist, but that is such a dude thing. She put cold water in and didn't put in detergent. I was like, well, what? Oh, hang on. you how good to soak. Not to be sexist, but that is such a dude thing. She put cold water in and didn't put any detergent. I was like, well, what's...

Oh, hang on. She did attempt to soak. Yeah, she's like, these need to soak. And I was like, what are you doing? Let me teach you how to soak, honey. Hot water, bit of detergent, now we're soaking. Firstly, you don't need to freaking soak. But secondly, if you are going to do it, you've got to put some detergent in there.

13, 10, 16. It was just turning into, what are they doing wrong? What are they doing wrong? It doesn't matter who they are. Because let's be real, I know I'm doing some stuff wrong too. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. 13, 10, 60, you're asking.

What's a man doing wrong? That's right. A woman has sparked debate online after, I think, attempting to shame her man the way he does the washing. Yeah. He puts the cap of detergent in its liquid. He puts it straight in on top of the clothes rather than into the tray. Into the dispenser as Westinghouse, I guess,

decided this is the way we are going to do it. People then come out saying when you're putting into the dispenser, the dispenser gets dirty. You need to clean that. And other people didn't realise, I don't think I've ever cleaned my dispenser. You need to clean your dispenser? Apparently so.

I mean, I've never done that. But you just put a detergent into it. I've never really paid attention to that. Neither have I. But it stands to reason I wanted to initially be on her side, but, I mean, I just do that to the dishwasher, chuck it all in. Yep. What's the difference?

It's going on there anyway. Yeah, that's what I think. I do stand by you've got to separate your loads. See, I just put it all in the one, lights and darks, which has bit me in the butt a few times, I will be honest. I know. Your white tea's all coming out grime. Yeah, yeah.

But, I mean, it's not the end of the world. I've got to do what I've got to do. But it begs the question, what's your man doing wrong? Yeah. Do we need to put it to the team, put it to temperature check? Brittany's called through. Good morning, Britt. Good morning.

What's your man doing wrong, Brittany? I'm going to be honest. He stacks the dishwasher wrong. Yep. And it stresses me out to no end, but we also have a rule in our house that if you want it done a certain way, you do it yourself. Oh, I see. I see.

That's a good rule. But also, Brittany, he would know that rule, and so does it just become, okay, well, I don't do it the way you want me to do it, so now I just well, I don't do it the way you want me to do it, so now I just won't even attempt to do it? Well, it turns into a, if you want me to do it, I'm going to do it my way, and you don't get to whinge about it, or you do it yourself. Yeah, I don't mind that rule.

If I work all day and he's at home doing chores, he's sort of like, okay, well, I've done it my way because I've been home, and you don't get to complain because I've done it. I've done it, yeah, I've given it my best shot. But the issue is if he's stacking bowls on bowls on lasagna trays, things actually might not be hit with the water if there is no sense to his stacking. This is an insight into Jess's dishwasher, wasn't it? Bowls on bowls into lasagna trays.

It always gets hit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It always gets hit. I'm not the best stacker. No, it doesn't always get hit if things aren't stacked well. In every relationship, one person's a good stacker and one person just chucks everything in there. You know what I mean?

That's just how it is. Like, I'll chuck things on top of things like, you know, like random utensils. Tongs can go on top of a ladle, which can go on top of. Oh, Jesus. Angus doesn't like using the cutlery basket. Oh, I love the basket. When you put them in, they face up.

So do I. Whereas Angus, our dishwasher, unbelievable, came with a basket but also the tray. Oh, I like the tray, yeah. He much prefers the tray. So when I go in the kitchen, I'm like, what's the basket doing out there? He goes, I don't want to use that because I'm stacking bowls on bowls on bowls. Oh, I see.

He's putting more space in. Yes. There you go, Brittany. You sparked a debate. Thank you. Josie on 131060, what's your man doing wrong, Jos? When he cooks dinner, he will cook everything else first and then put the pasta on to boil last.

Okay, so what? Everything's a bit out of whack in terms of, oh, that's starting to cool down now before the spaghetti's even ready. Yeah, so the food's normally cold, and then by the time the spaghetti's served, it's also still crunchy. As a bloke, though, the pasta's one of those things where you think it's like frying an egg. Like, ah, that's also still crunchy. As a bloke, though. And that's cooked, apparently. The pasta's one of those things where you think it's like frying an egg. Like, ah, that'll take two minutes.

You don't realise it actually takes long. You need eight to nine minutes. You forget. And so you think, I've done my sauce. Wow, I've done everything. Oh, the pasta. Unless your sauce needs a good simmer, you need to be timing that a little bit better. Yeah.

But, Josie, I'm sure it's another thing like Brittany was saying. I've cooked, though. Yeah. Be grateful. I've done it. This is me doing it my way. You got your way. You like it. I'm sure it's another thing like Brittany was saying. I've cooked though. Be grateful. This is me doing it my way. You got your way, you like it. I'm still getting it done. I'm just doing it my own way. Yeah, it's just my dinner's cold now. Jessie on

131060, what's your man doing wrong? What isn't my man doing wrong? Give us your top thing. Every time he goes and has a shower, for some reason he thinks the dirty clothes basket is just on the floor, but it's actually right next to his bloody toe. He's just putting it always on the ground right near the washing basket

and our bathroom's that bloody tiny, so I don't get it. I don't get it. It's next to the washing basket as well. I refuse to use the washing basket and our bathroom's that bloody tiny, so I don't get it. I don't get it. It's next to the washing basket as well. I refuse to use the washing basket. Sophie, continue this for us. What's your man doing wrong? He's got this belief that you can't overtake someone unless you've got an added line.

What do you mean? So you know how like the broken white line means you can overtake? Yes, yes. He doesn't believe that that's true. So he'll sit behind a semi-trailer for 250km. Oh, until the split lane comes in. Yeah, because he doesn't believe that you can go around it. I'm with you now.

I'm with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's easily Googled or clarified. He could go into his local bloody RMS. I know. Is he just like, no, no, I was told this. And doesn't that reek of like mum or dad told him that when he was learning to drive or whatever? And it's just, no, no, that's the way it's going to be.

It's so sensible and safe. It's one of those things I feel like if anybody else had told him, it would be an, oh, okay, no worries. Oh, because it's you? Because I said it. That's so good, though. And then every time they'd sit behind a truck, he would know that he could have a tape. He just won't. No, I can't.

I'm not doing it. Jasmine, wrap this up for us, babe. What's your man doing wrong? Jasmine? Yes, hello. Jazzy, hello. What's going on? Hello.

He's wiping his bum wrong. How many ways is there to do it? I mean, what's he doing? Well, listen, I honestly thought it was only one way. However, he cups his genitals, then he wipes from the back to the front. No. He cups his voice. Who does that?

What, to give him a slight lift? To hide the barriers from getting any. Now, I've had many conversations with friends and drinks, and he's tried to confirm it with his mates, and they all tell him he's doing it wrong. You can't do from the back to the front. You're just spreading the legs. Do you remember the first time you witnessed this, Jasmine?

Yeah, the legs were spread on the toilet and he, yes, as a man does, has his phone in his hand and the other one is cupping. He puts his phone down and then he wipes. That's so strange. So he has to go in between his legs. He's got to get a real rounded back, like the Hunchback of Notre Dame. No, come forward. Getting the back to bring it forward.

That workbench was not working for quite some time. It ain't hot. like the Hunchback of Notre Dame and getting the back to bring it forward. That workbench was not working for quite some time. It ain't hot, Jasmine. When you know that. When you know that. And like Sophie was saying, Jasmine, have you tried to express, one, it's easier, just like ergonomically. Have you tried to demonstrate?

And he goes, no, no, my way is the right way. And then he tried to teach our son. Oh, no. Monkey see, monkey do. Surely not. No, I was like, no, no. Oh, no, goodness me. Wow, Jasmine's husband, if you're listening, that is not right. That is, that's strange.

Wow. I wonder where you picked that up. And I just picturing, like, you know, the pants around his ankles. Yeah, yeah, just coming forward, cupping the berries. Jess and Ducko. Just needed to get you across something, Ducko. We received a couple of DMs on the Jess and Ducko socials. They all had the same inference.

They were really concerned that we were unaware of our images being used. Jess was one of the people who got in touch and she said, guys, thought you might get a laugh out of being the pictures for online smut. Not sure if you want to do anything about it. And I originally, when I saw the link she'd sent, was a bit like, is this a scam? Is this a hack? Is this a, what is this?

And I was a bit nervous to click the link and I thought, no, no, I need to investigate. So I did and it took me to a Facebook page called Happy Day. And I'm going to read you a little bit of the passage. The story is called Sir, Madam Wants to Divorce You. Now it's quite long, so I've just gone the sort of the back end paragraph here. That's when I heard the water running. Timothy was showering in there. The blood drained from my face. We had just signed the divorce papers, yet Timothy was already raring to jump into bed with his first love, Maya. My stomach roiled at the thought of what would happen on that bed.

Still, I controlled myself and packed a few belongings in my suitcase. Timothy came out and said he was the one to pay for all those things I was packing, so I could not take them. He added, I also bought those clothes that you're currently wearing. She said, fine, I'll return them to you as well. I stood there and decided to risk everything. I slowly undid the buttons of my shirt, revealing my delicate collarbones. Slower, demanded Timothy, as his expression darkened. The other woman was still lying there on the bed, waiting for him, but watching us. She looked at me mockingly.

What a show, little bumpkin. And here I was, almost believing you. Next, her shriek splits the silence. For more, click this link. What is that? And it's photo... I have no idea, but the photos that are attached are of the freaking maternity shoot. Yeah, that we did.

That you and I did two years ago. Yeah. I've got no idea how those photos even relate to that passage or the story. What? I have no idea what happy day is, but why, why have they used us? Is it like threesome-y stuff? Because there's three of us in it. And that's exactly what this.

And that's what's in the thing. It says, Sir, Madam wants to divorce you in this article, djnovel.com. But the story, as I read, the story is about Timothy and this woman, and he's already brought his new love into the bed, which would infer it's two women. The photos are two blokes. Yeah, yeah. It must be Thrappily stuff.

It's obviously Thruppley stuff. It's obviously Thruppley stuff. Because maybe, maybe when you click more and read the story, it does escalate into, okay, we can all be happy family. I see, I see. So now they've taken out. But they've used our photos as the face for this online smart story. Oh, no. We're the face for Thrupples.

We're the face for throubles. We're the face for throubles. Hence why Jess, our friendly rice cooker, has gone, not sure if you guys want me to report it. Do you want to report it? They're using you. How do they do that? I have no idea. I understand those images were on our socials two years ago

and I guess they're open for public consumption. It reeks of a bit of. It really does. I guess they're open for public consumption. It reeks of a bit of... I'm looking for someone other than my wife. It really does. Other than my wife. Ashley Madison's right by my side. Ashley Madison. If I actually read the rest of the story, we don't have time for it. Yeah, it's big.

If we actually read the rest of the story, it is big. She was seeing Babs out there when you read it. She was getting hot under her collar. Were you getting hot under her collar? My goodness. It actually starts by saying this main character finds out she's pregnant. Oh, and you're pregnant in this. And Timothy wants to divorce her and has already brought in his mistress

into the, you know, family bed. That's bizarre. So they've used a picture of obviously a pregnant woman being me and then two other people. That's bizarre because we did that as a fun photo shoot. That was meant to be a bit of fun. To be fair, I did try and get those on billboards. I was unsuccessful in doing so.

It also had a lot of, yeah, that photo got a lot of airtime in a lot of different places, a lot of different forums. It really did. And it's still going. Two years on, it's still being used. Because people thought we were genuine as a throuple. And then people were up, random people who don't know the show were commenting who's the partner, who's not.

Which one's the daddy? And people thought it was me and our co-host Nick that were, you know, together. And I was your surrogate. Yeah. So people were commenting that on it. So it's still all these years on, Dago, morphing and being used in various ways. I'm not sure if this is Australian. It doesn't really...

How do you feel to be used as the face of thruffles? I mean, they're beautiful pics. I do love the pics. I don't hate it. You look happy. We all look happy. This story, it's not my cup of tea. The Facebook page is owned by a company called the Beijing Times Technology Company.

China's taken over. We do have a few listeners in China. Shout out to them. Hang on. God, I love a piggyback. Are we massive on Weibo? Huge on Weibo. Are we huge on Weibo?

Yeah, yeah. There's an app called Good Novel. Oh. Yes. So it is a novel app. Yep. What I'm hearing is should we be investigating for royalties? I think so.

I'm happy if you're happy. I'm happy for the image to be used, but I'd like some compensation. I'll buy some money for this. If you're going to make us the face of thruffles. Yeah. If Peter and Felicity in China, obviously great Chinese names, are getting off to this sort of online smart, why are we not being compensated fairly?

Absolutely. That's bizarre. We should look into this more. For our pregnancy, Pjorn, I think we should be compensated. And then we should do one with the four of us. Oh, I love that. And we'll do it for quadruples. An underserved market, if I do say so.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Babs, how do you feel about organising a photo shoot? The four of us can now be the face of, what did you say? Quadruples. Quadruples. It's a little bit weird. Yeah. Mate, I'm pretty sure it's in your job description.

Jess and Ducko. Colourfine. Colourfine. Colourfine. With no crap face April is Newcastle Food Month. Cafes, restaurants, pubs, clubs, hotels are all getting involved for an amazing culinary experience.

And we want to jump on board by giving you an overnight stay at the beautiful Crystal Book Pingsley. It's called a foodie sleepover and hook you up with $500 cash. So you can come from anywhere. Come from anywhere and enjoy. Yep. All that is on offer. You just need to get involved at some point during the show.

Mm-hmm. Like someone did about an hour ago, Ducko. We were talking about what's your man doing wrong? Yeah. A woman has divided the internet after trying to shame her boyfriend for putting washing detergent directly on the clothes. Yeah. A woman has divided the internet after trying to shame her boyfriend for putting washing detergent directly on the clothes. Yes. And not using the dispenser tray of the washing machine.

Yeah. We're sort of split. The internet was split. Beg the question, is there something similar going on in your house? Jasmine told us about her boyfriend. He's wiping his bum wrong. How many ways is there to do it? I mean, what's he doing?

Well, listen, I honestly thought it was only one way. However, he cups his genitals, then he wipes from the back to the front. No. He cups his boyfriend. What, to give him a slight lift? To hide the barriers from getting any. I've had many conversations with friends and drinks, and he's tried to confirm it with his mates, and they all tell him he's doing it wrong.

You can't do from the back to the front. You're just spreading the legs. Do you remember the first time you witnessed this, Jasmine? Yeah, the legs were spread on the toilet, and he, yes, as a man does, has his phone in his hand. And the other one is cupping. He puts his phone down and then he wipes. That's so strange.

So he has to go in between his legs. He's got to get a real rounded back, like the hunchback of Notre Dame. No, it comes forward. Getting the back to bring it forward. That workbench was not working for quite some time. Jasmine. Jasmine just DM'd us, Ducco. Jaz, did your boyfriend just hear you revealing that little tidbit

on the radio? Yes. And was he happy with you? He told me that I'm dead to him. Well, you can text him back and say, well, at least I won the call. Yay! Oh my God!

Yeah, you got a Christopher Kingsley $500 cash for the Newcastle 30-month sleepover. And they're like, you can all take it if you win. What do you do with yourself, Jasmine? Are you a teacher? How old is the class you've got in front of you?

What's the age? Year seven. Year seven. Tell them all to make some noise. Give a shout out. Come on. Ready? Go.

Yell out. That's awesome. Miss just won it because her partner doesn't want his bum right. It's a good lesson for the kids. It's a good lesson for the kids. Well, Miss Jasmine, thank you so much for joining the show. We'll let you get back to your classroom. Have a great day.

You enjoy it. Thank you. Study hard, kids. Wipe right. That's right. Oh, that's so funny. We're scrubbing the curriculum today. We're focusing on how to wipe properly.

I love how she stopped the class. Guys, I'm going to win something on the radio. Babs has just called me back. I'm going to have to take this. I'm how she stopped the class now. Guys, I'm going to win something on the radio. Babs has just called me back. I'm going to have to take this. I'm just going to do this real quickly. Just listen. Follow your dreams, guys. Absolutely.

And wipe front to back. Wipe front to back. We're back tomorrow. Another one of those up for grabs for the Cofod. Plus, for my baby registry, you're listening out for the crying baby and the cuter call. You can have it any time in the show. You can screw yourself a brand new iPhone. That's right.

Shy Guy, our tech guy over here, says this is the latest. He's got a full head over there. And greatest. So all you need to do is be listening out from six. It could happen any time. Hell yeah. During the ads, during a song, in the middle of a conversation. You just need to be the quickest on the phone.

We also have Shy Guy dips. We've also got 10 cow fucks twice in the show. It's going to be a big Wednesday. Last week, Shy Guy and I were both ill and Babs dipped. Yes. I forgot about that. How did she go? It was good.

It was a good dipping. I think it was Fruit Loops, wasn't it, Babs? Yeah, it was Fruit Loops. I just told her before, remember, you've got to be bad at giving clues. That's right. Don't be too accurate. She tried really hard to be bad. She focused on the iron levels.

Yes. A bit obscure. High levels, Hellstar. Love the air check from young Shy Guy there. I was doing phones from home there. Shy Guy was listening. Yeah, he was in. Well, in from home. But yeah, it went alright, didn't it, Babs? I think so. Except it felt weird saying, because at the end of it

we say, I'm so excited to win Shy Guy's box. I was like, I pivoted on the fly and still said Shy Guy's. I think that's a right... Felt like the right thing to do. It was the right call. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Very good. We're out of here. That's back tomorrow.

We will. See you then. Bye-bye. Bye. Had to shave Migaloo's hoo-ha. That's my wife. Jess and Ducko. That was the Jess and Ducko podcast.

Macca's Fiery News Spicy Chicken McRap is even more reason for a Macca's Run.