Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | I don't think I want to sniff bulk armpits all day

Episode Date: August 12, 2025

We unpack the new fake wedding trend in India, the team call Shy Guy on his "day off" and we ask you 'have you broken the unbreakable?". Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The rumours are true. Macca's new Mick Griddles is finally on the Brecky menu. Jess and Ducco. This is the Jess and Duggo podcast. If you've got kids, maybe. Yeah, probably a bad part to listen to it. That is a bad part. Remember my doula?

Yeah. She messaged me one time being like, Jesus, you need to put a warning on the podcast. Got it. Morning! Yeah, we can get pretty loose. Because whilst the show, we have to have some semblance of a leash, some semblance of a muzzle, particularly as we get later in the morning,

which is reflected obviously in the order. of the show. This, no hold to bar. Yeah, this is a... So if you've got little ears around... Yeah. They better be ready for an education. You two,

you two had a bonding chat today over laser. That's right. Because shy guys away, so it's just Babs and jazz. How did that come up, Babs? Oh, one of the stories we cover on the show... Speak with confidence there, Babs. No, I was like, oh, I'm not the right microphone.

I don't know. It's going to work. Yeah, no works. I got you on. Okay. One of the stories we were covering pre-show was about armpid hair. Yes, that's right. And we started talking about, well, I don't have it.

any anymore because I have laser. But you can still have a scent from there because that story is about how the scent now men are into it. That's right. We just got nothing to do with hair. It's actually two different things. You're absolutely right. Which I think we are moving.

I keep seeing, I don't know if I'm in an echo chamber on my social media, but I feel like I'm seeing a lot more women going, I'm stopping shaving. I'm not doing this anymore. Whereas ladies like us, and men, I guess, if you've done laser,

ah, you've committed. armpit hair is disgusting. I don't like it either. I don't like men or women. Like, like it's gross place to have hair. I have just a gross place to have hair. I read I read this whole thing

I don't know what rabbit hole I went down It was this whole thing of like Do you think it's gross or is that how society has trained you And I'm like no I think it's gross I think that's my own opinion I don't like it To be fair you do you it's your armpit Nothing looks weir than a dude without armpit hair

I'm sorry My ex you know the crazy man He was from eyelashes down Smooth Because he was an athlete If I put my armpits on around you saw bald You'd be like what's going on there Yeah you know what that's a good point

Which is the lesser of two evils? Full bush or nothing? For a guy? For a guy. Yeah, I think full bush for a guy. But maybe that's just how I... See, I think bald. Are you like, you think bald is better on a dude.

I think Angus, shape his armp hair, waxed it. Angus is blessed. Obviously, being Caucasian, ancestors, Irish English. It doesn't have a lot there anyway. You know what I mean? He's got the minimal smattering on chest. Yeah. He maintains downstairs very well.

So yeah, armpit hair has never been an issue for me on him. Yeah. Well, I've been reading all these articles saying that, that the hair down there is coming back. Yes, that's the thing. Like the bush is coming back. Similarly to the armpit hair. I've seen a few articles about it now.

Similarly to the armpit hair rhetoric. And it's like, do you think it's gross or a society told you to shave it? What did I see a campaign for a razor company? But they're very much like, you know, the whole marketing thing? It's like, we sell this product. But if you don't want to use us, it's fine. They're saying, bring back the bunny ears. I'd never heard that before.

When a lady, stereotypically, would wear a bikini. the bunny ears of hair Oh, pop out in the outside They say it looks like a bunny I've never heard that comparison Before the tufts Of hair Either side of the bikini line

Bunny ears Could you imagine seeing that I mean golf appeared Those girls who now Wear like G string bikinis And there's like a piece of string Oh my God While we're over in Europe

Geez The amount of flesh But the Europeans are much more open With their bodies And they're much more Embrace Did you wear a bikini over there? You would have felt like you were in a full body suit

I only brought, I only bought, do you know what? How's these? I only brought a one piece. Ah, yes. So yes, I did feel like I was wearing full top to toe coverage when all these, we went to a pool. Because we're in the north of Italy, it's not beaches, but, you know, it's hot. We've got the kid. We're like, let's find a public pool.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They made us buy swimming caps, but not the latex ones. Like, we're familiar with, like, Thorpey or Kay Campbell. It's like fabric, but they're so hygiene. Yes. I think it's a home. Paging thing, they don't want hair in the pool. So everyone was wearing these material swimming cap.

That would have looked so ridiculous. It's so so ridiculous. They were three euro each. We had to buy them. I've got the freaking extensions. I look like a cone head because I'm trying to shove all my hair into these stupid swimming cap. It's weird. Yeah, that is weird.

Everyone was wearing them and Angus and I like, did everyone bring these or do you have to buy them? Can you rent them? There's one guy like, three euros. We tried to get into the pool. pool and we got the whistle being like, and he started not yelling at us in Italian, but I went, oh, me disbiante Nepali English, and he's like,

you must, you must cover. Oh, we're to go buy them. Just in a pool. Just in a public pool. That just feels bizarre. We looked stupid. Between my stupid, long, long hair trying to shove him in and Angus's giant head. I would love to have seen it. And we looked so dumb. Yeah, the cone heads.

The cone head. It looked really stupid. It would have looked weird. I hate wearing swimming caps. It's a weird thing to wear. Yes, yes. A bit harder for girls. Exactly, with all the hair. Yeah. And then you end up with the bloody, it's like dug into your brain because they're so tight.

Did I just get the DTs out? No, he's not a DT man. Look how stupid we look. I like the traditional water polo. Yeah. That's so funny. He wears, what do you make of this? He wears DTs underboard shorts.

Yeah, that's what I do. Okay, yeah. Yeah. Because then it's like they can get wet and dry quicker than undies. 100%. But I can't wear it. D.T. swimming. No. It feels weird. I say to him, like, we're in Italy. Like, you can do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They are so, as I said, they embrace. No one cares.

But he can't do it. He's not. Yeah, yeah. I want to see him in a jockstrap. Just getting, getting wet. Don't worry. I've tried. I have tried. I try and get him to wear the blue light glasses. I try and get him to dress up. Just love me for me. I'm like, I don't. You're boring. But can't we just have a bit? I can't. Yeah, yeah. While you're sucking his toes? Yes. Ah, good times. How did we get onto this, laser?

Lays, yeah. You know, so Babs are sure as me. Her journey is going well. Yeah, that's good, Babs. Yeah. Really happy for you. Thank you. Yeah.

Do you want to give a plug? Maybe get some spawncon. Oh, yeah. You get free laser. Hey, I'm Babs. And do you need to clean up downstairs? No, because I lied to the lady yesterday because I didn't want to know, like, where I were. Just in case.

Yeah. You never know. You never know. You never know. When she's up in there deep, you don't want that. I would find that really weird. It's so weird. It's so weird.

I went to do my taxes the other day, and the chick's like, I know who you are. I was like, oh, okay. Very different, the tax lady from the vagina lady. How did she, how did she know? Like, did she? She just listens all the time. That's great. But we don't use your real name on air.

Her mom told her, because she also works out. I don't know. Did you get your return? Oh, not really. But you got a return. I did, yeah. Yeah, it was good. But I was like, hopeful, you know.

Yeah. I'm doing mine next week and he's like, do you have any receipts? I'm like, fuck, no. I got transaction history. Yeah. He's my highlight. You know me, man. I could not do that.

Have you given to charity? I swear I have. I swear I have. I don't definitely give it like 300 bucks to charity, but I can't prove it. I know. It's a tough thing to say you did and then not have any proof. When they send the email, you should screenshot it and put it in a file, but I just don't. I'm like, I swear I did.

I know. I'm going to go back and think about everything that I've like done. I'm like, head cuts. Every time my dad goes, do you keep the logbook for your fuel and your mileage and your kilometers? I'm like, no, dad. No one does that anymore, though. I know.

Hence why my dad's asking. I heard a mate who said, if you just get one card, like one credit card, and you put like all your petrol, all your clothes that you get, maybe that you can claim back on that card and you don't cross-pollinate cards. Like, you don't contend. That's actually a really good idea. That card is your tax card. Then all those receipts on that card, a history of worthy.

Never going to not cross-contaminate, though. I know. It'll be like, what's his one Woolworth sort of? Oh, crap. Oh, damn, I use that then. At least we've got shy guy dips. We could always, you know. Well, the Woolworths was for a segment.

I claim clothes. I do the Today Show, but I also claim clothes for that mainly, but also we get filmed every day, you know? Yeah, he's not funny. See, I tried to do that, but I think my account's too straighty 180. He's like, but you need clothes. And I was like, yeah, I know, but mine is loose, man. Mine is a loose.

Sometimes I'm like, whoa, pump the brakes. I can't say that. He's up. He's amazing. He's good. That's fantastic. But he does take a big cut, so, you know, each their own. I think because of the Today show, because I'm on TV, I can claim close.

See that. I generally had to go and buy. buy, like, new button-ups or t-shirts to wear. I think my dude was like, but have you ever worn those clothes outside of work? And I said, well, yeah. And he goes, well, then no. Oh, fuck that. Yeah, I know.

He's straight. I'm never getting ordered it. Let's be real. Like, as in, because of him, he's so. Yeah, yeah. Oh, every time he's like, this is your return. I'm like, oh, holy shit. You are on a tightrope.

You are on a tightrope. Hey, he's been serving my family for years. He really has. He's just the, he's the court accountant. Oh, he is. Babs, you should go to him. I'll give you my guys, did you. You're not convincing me.

No, trust me. When you see what you get back. Her pie doesn't come back big enough for him to take a slice of the other. Yeah, I was going to say. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I used to go to him, and so did Jace. But they've all moved to the other guy. They're all a bit too worried. Yeah. How this guy's still in business? The day you get ordered, please make sure you tell us. Well, I've been red flagged before a couple years ago.

This was like three years ago. Yes. And they just said it was suspicious. But ever since then, like, I actually don't claim anything that I couldn't. Yeah. Maybe you put up. Hey, man. And you're not doing this on your own.

Your guy is a guy. I probably just don't have the proof for everything that I'm saying I do. It's like, oh, fuck, I couldn't find that receipt from industry where I got those two shirts to wear on the Today Show. But what you do have is a social media clip of you having been on the Today Show wearing that. So there is a level of proof. Yeah, exactly. But I'm at my account, I text him. I'm like, hey, mate, ready to do the return this year?

He's like, yeah, yeah, let's go. Like, we're like, we're on that kind of basis. That's an unbelievable relationship. It's great. It's fantastic. I know. I never want to change. It's just so.

boring those meetings. Oh, they fucking suck. Because now Angus and I have, like, combined whatever. Again, I'm so useless. And we have to go to meetings with, like, the spreadsheets and stuff on the big projector. And I'm like, I don't know what I'm looking at. I guess it's, like, four accounts. Brian, tell me about it.

I'm like, I don't understand. They make you feel more immature. How's this? Morgan has to pay tax every year. Has to pay. Despite her salary being, like, a nurse salary, not fantastic. It's like something to do with, like, our combined income and it's, I get returns. and she still has to pay.

I'm like, how does this work? How does it work? I don't know. I don't understand how that works. I know it's not a wrought because it's actually quite regulated. But I just can't fathom because it's like one of those areas where you go, you're the only ones who understand. Do you know what I mean?

I don't understand. So you could be saying anything. It's like a mechanic. You could be doing anything. Yes. Yeah. Oh, my radiator's broken? Sure.

You're in complete control. You have all the power. You have all the upper hand. It pays to have an accountant in the family. Yes. Well, even my dad is. as a financial advisor, but it is such a different specific thing that I've asked my dad questions that an accountant asked, and he goes, I don't know.

Like, have you spoken to your dad about getting into like Bitcoin or anything? Because he's like a traditional financial advisor. No, exactly. I talked to my dad about investments, but he's old school. He's like gold and optus and stuff like that. Gold is king. But like, my dad's big super. He's like put it all in super, super, super, super, super, super.

Because I'm looking into Bitcoin right now. Okay. I've never, I've never like done it. Right. She did it. I'm like, fuck, is it one of those things that, like, you're going to get left behind if you don't do it? Angus and I opened an investment portfolio for Lucia.

Yeah. Because we were like, let's start growing it now. Maybe by the time she turns 18, it'll be enough for her to buy a car or something like that. And then we thought, well, what we're doing it? Do we open one for us? But again, we go, I don't know what it means. Yeah, yeah, I don't get it all my passwords to my dad and go,

can you pick some stuff? Yeah, yeah. Oh, 100%. No idea. I hear gold's really good, but I would know where to find that. Truly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do I get a gold bar at my house?

And I just wish I really want to latch on to something because I think it actually would be very exciting. And it's profitable if you could play it properly. But you need to be on top of it. Yeah, I'll totally. And understanding it. That's why I'm like, you see some Bitcoin success stories. Obviously there's a lot of bad ones out of two.

It's volatile. But I'm like, I feel like, is that going to be, you know, futuristic. I still don't understand what Bitcoin is. It's not tangible. I don't get it. God forbid you ask me what an NFT is. I'm like, if I can't go to Woolworths and do my shop with it, is it money? Do you know what I mean?

Yeah. Like, you've got currency in the title, cryptocurrency. Yeah. But I can't, I can't, I can't pay for my laser appointment with Bitcoin. Oh, God, that should be the test. Can you pay for your laser with it? I got one Bitcoin for laser. Can you tidy up me bunny?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can you tidy up my bunny ears? Can I pay on this? No. Well, then it's not money. I should say our own coin, bunny coin, bunny coin. Bunny your coin. I love that.

Yeah, that'd be fun. Do you have Bitcoin, Babs? No. Do any of your friends? No. Surely they'd be young enough and like into it. I know a couple of friends that did when it first started, but not now. Maybe that was crypto.

I can't remember. Some form of crypto. Isn't that the same thing? It's a same. It's a cryptocurrency. I think Bitcoin is a type of cryptocurrency. I feel like Shagga, I'd have Bitcoin. I have a feeling Shagga is like a secret millionaire.

Like as in, he's got an investment portfolio. I want to text him right now and see if he's got Bitcoin. Can you ask him, what's your net worth? Yeah, yeah. Actually, you know, I'll call him because he'll think something's wrong. Yeah, very good. And then I'm going to say, just quickly, do you have Bitcoin? He'll definitely think something's wrong.

He's probably with Fabrizio still. Probably good remembering the name. Thank you. Pick up, Shy Lord. Maybe they've broken something. Oh, fuck, I'm not picking up. How rude. I know.

I thought he'd see my call and be like, scro you, shy lord. Screw you, shy lord. Yeah, okay. Well, we'll find out tomorrow if he's got a bit coin. Absolutely. I'll ask him the top of the show. Do you have Bitcoin?

How much are you worth? Bring up your bank account. Yeah. in the morning. Good morning. Good to be here. I'm in the dog house, ducco. Early dog house.

So obviously you and I both leave our sleeping partners and hopefully sleeping children as we exit our houses to come to work. Make no noise. Which means, you know, the bathroom routine getting changed, maybe grabbing keys, drink bottles has to be done in as much as close to silence as possible. I sat down on the toot this morning and went, what's my friend Mel sent me, clicked on it? It was a Moulan reel. My phone was on full ball. Woke the kid up. So I had to leave.

Oh, that is so annoying. I had to walk into Angus's room with her. We're doing morning number two. You were back on one out. I was on my squatty potty. Yeah, yeah. See, I say it was the Moulin. Maybe it was just me.

But my kid woke up. I think it was that. My stupid phone was on phone. When do I ever have the volume up? That's why I thought I could click into it. Oh. And maybe read the caption or whatever she'd send me. And would have worked at everyone.

Everyone had the biggest fright. Exactly. Did she cry? She didn't cry, but I just, as soon as it blasted through my phone, I quickly tried to shut it down. Two seconds later, Mama? Oh, no, no. And I went, can I just leave?

I went, no, because if I don't go in, not only will she feel abandoned, because she definitely heard something. Angus is just going to have to deal with the escalation. So I went in and I couldn't settle her back down. Oh, so I walked into our bedroom and went, Here she is. She's all ready to go at 5 in the morning. I feel so bad.

And was he just like, what is happening? He was very asleep. So he was like, what? Yeah, no worry. So anyway, when I get home. Did you check her in the bed and just say, like, I just was like, yeah, bye. Sleep in there.

Sleep in there. I just thought if they're cuddling, maybe she'll goze back off to sleep. I feel really bad. That's a word to the wise. Don't open Mulan. Do you always go to the toilet number two pre-shut? Not always. Yeah, because I'm.

I'd say four mornings a week. Wow, I don't think I've ever done it. I don't think I've ever done a pre-show back out. I don't know if it's a good or bad thing. I think we might be if opposite ends of the gut health spectrum. You obviously have a few issues, one end. I'm so... It's just regular, bang.

I don't know if it's regular, though. I'm so over like OTT. Yeah, it's like you put anything in there, it's out. Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that a fast metabolism? Can you imagine if I don't know what that is. I don't know what it is either.

Babs, what is that out there? Babbs to give me eyes. I don't know what that is, evil. Yeah, yeah. Babs and I don't have this. Angus and I've got into a habit. This is what my relationship looks like, guys. We'll have a big meal or whatever.

Maybe an hour or so later I come out of the bathroom and go, well, no more steak. Or like, oh, no more carbonara. It's gone. It's gone. Yeah, yeah. Ah, isn't marriage sexy? I, isn't it hot? It's so, yeah, yeah.

Honey, I was backing one out today watching a clip me, friend sent me, I woke up our child. Here she is. I'm off to work. What do we have last night? nachos. No more nachos. It's got. Oh, nachos would have run right through you. Beef? And it was leftover. So he makes the

mince for tacos Monday and then we have nachos Tuesday. That's a good way to do it. Oh no, sorry, that must be Sunday Monday. Exactly. Yeah. Because he makes so much. What kind of meat we're talking? A beef mince. He's a beef. He's a beef. He's a man. With the kidney bean. Obviously. Obviously. I just hope my body is actually extracting some nutrients because it just moves so quickly.

You do eat a lot of carb, though. I do eat a lot of carb, so it must show that it's, it is flush and through. Truly. I should be the size of a house. Well, you said it. That's what I mean. It's probably working.

Can you imagine if I actually trained properly? You'd be in bulk of season. Lucky. Nothing changed, please. I'm just cruising through. Hold on to this forever. Because Angus's guts, it'd be very different to yours. Very different.

Yeah. Very different. But he also doesn't eat what I eat during the day. Yeah, he doesn't have two balls of pasta. He'll have like a proper meal. Yeah, yeah. Salad. My muscle chef?

What the hell's? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, they're easy. I say, what do you have for lunch today? Because I obviously want to know everything is eaten. And he goes, my muscle chef, my muscle chef. Yeah, yeah. What is my muscle chef?

It's just like a pre-made meal. I'm a bit over now. I think it gets it from like a seven-ele. You can get them from bullies. I used to like them, but like, ah, they're a bit, yeah. Yeah, because every soul of it would be like, I didn't have a good one. I went, ah. Lunch is the worst meal of the day to prepare.

I couldn't agree, ma'am. What do you have? What do you have? This is why he pasta every day. Yeah. What are people eating for lunch? I don't want a sandwich all the time You can't have a pie all the time

That's what Angus says to me He goes, people eat sandwiches What? I can make chicken and veggies and rice so much Yes, yes, absolutely Yeah I wish I liked tuna Yeah

Tuna rice and avocado You do what I did And you overdose on canned tuna And then you get sick from that Because you have too much can't So all right So now your guts are resisting apple Now the resisting tuna

Was it brown rice? You also could have Brown rice is the thing That I have completely cut out of my diet That has helped That's wild. Yeah, brown rice is the thing that just, it was no love for me. Because isn't it funny?

All the blogs I read about health, it's like brown rice over white rice. I know. No, no. Breaks down slower in the body. Badd's, you shouldn't be having brown rice either, okay? Actually, I've cut it out, because you said. And it helps? Yeah, I feel the same, but like, it was bad.

You should, you know, every second influencer and celebrity's got a cookbook. I remember we should do the ducko cookbook for healthier guts. What to avoid. What to avoid? What to avoid. Brown rice and apples. That would be a short cookbook. Yeah, that's it, all right.

Give me 20 bucks. Hey, we have a big show, though. Obviously, Shaw guys aren't here today because he's taking the piss. He has taken a day in lieu after we've had three weeks off to move house. And I just can't fathom they couldn't come at 9.30. Did you notice yesterday we were talking the boss about? The boss didn't care. I was like, something's fishy happening here.

The boss backed him. Oh, do you reckon? I was going to make a joke about something we probably didn't talk about. Okay. No, I want to hear it. Because I've got in a mental health day. Sorry, she shouldn't talk about that. It's not funny.

No, no. If he is, then more powers... Day two, Shire's having a mental health. The boss does not back any of us up on anything. And yet, needing to move house at 7am, the boss was all cool with it. Interesting. There is something fishy going on. So Babs is stepping up today in that role.

Yes. Babs, you feeling good today? Yeah, feeling good. Okay. She's good in the guts, good in the mind. Hey, we're good to go. Here we go. We got her cheering tickets on the show.

We got Alpha Bucks on this show. show. Oh my God, let alone a lot of laughs. We're going to probably call Shagai, I think, and try and confront him, maybe when the removals are there. Let's if we can catch him out. Yep. Yep.

Great. I'm going to need to be put on to the removalist. Obviously. I don't believe that they're there. I want to speak to them. Something is a ride. And then I'll know what he does for a profession. He'll hate it.

Yeah, he'll have to make small talk. Up next, though. You could be moving into a realm that I think you might like. Okay. Women's armpit hair can be relaxing for men. Talk to me. Talk to me. Because my laser's kind of like,

wearing off. Is it coming back? Well, while we're overseas, I kind of looked at one point, I went, whoa, whoa. What's that? Where'd you guys come from? Oh, yeah. Interesting. So, because you need maintenance and it's a whole thing.

Yeah, yeah, keep going on. So, if there's a benefit. Apparently armpit hair fetishes are coming in. Here we go. Jess and Ducko. Shagga sent us a text as well, Jess. Oh, Tidi, I haven't checked my phone. He said, Mental Health Day, lull. Spoken like a guy on a mental health day.

Yeah, it sounds like someone's having a date. It's not a laughing matter. It's not. We'd never, but if... We send our best. You had three weeks to organise your mood. Don't tell you when I was best, because I was going to do something yesterday, it didn't work out, but I was messaging about it before show one.

And I said, did you, have you missed the team? You missed it. And he said, yeah, yeah. But like, I really enjoyed not working and sleeping in. It's one of those things where we've got such a joyous job, where you should feel guilty saying something like that, but he's just free and easy. I really enjoy not coming in. That mine.

Hey, right now, we're ducking over to... J-Pan. It's great to be here. Good to be back, really. You love J-Pan? I've been a couple of times. Chose that as your destination to propose. Yeah, yes, I did.

I don't like Tempura. Don't you? I don't want to go. You don't like ramen either, do you? Don't like Rama, don't tempura, and don't like... Katsu Kari? What's that? Chicken Katsu Kari?

Oh, so I like chicken. Yeah, it's like... You don't know what a chicken Katsu Kari is? No, I honestly, don't eat Japanese. It's the one that comes out. looking like poo. Oh, like, yes, it's great. But you don't like sushi either, do you.

I don't like sushi, don't like seafood. Don't go to Japan. And this is the thing, I'm scared of the robot takeover. Yeah. Japan is so technologically advanced. But they're so friendly and it's so clean. I have heard they're very polite people. And I'm very tall there.

That's one of the main reasons I enjoy it. I walk through, I walk through the Shibuya crossing. I'm like, look at me. People look up at me. You're ruffling the hair of all the smaller Japanese people. Oh, hey, my little buddy. Hey, big wheels. Oh, you?

People trying to take photos with you. Yeah, they're like, oh my God, look at this bloke. In shops, I'm like a large. I've never been a large. It is a fair. You have to shop in the kids department. Absolutely. I'm flat chat, you know?

This baggy gene trend is killing me over in Japan. Woohoo. I saw a billboard the other day and I thought of you. It was for a jean or a jacket company and it said like, oversized has never looked better. And I went, talk to my friend, okay. Talk to anyone under six foot. Yeah.

It's like, well, I'm getting these suit. fitted for my brother-in-law's wedding, my sister's wedding, I'm a groomsman, and he wants us to get these suits from this specific suit company, a well-known one, that is kind of known for okay jackets, but they don't do like a good fit. And I was like, brother, I have a unique body. I'm getting my own. I'm going to Rundles and I'm doing my own thing. I appreciate that you want us to all look uniform. I don't look good in that. It's like when people put their bridesmaids in all the same. They're different bodies. We've got a tailor to the person. It's a, it is a suit jacket with a shiny lapel.

Actually, I'm picturing your brother-in-law, he would look good in that style, right? He's a bigger guy. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, the reason we're in Japan, we've got to get to the point. Sorry, armpits. What do we know about them? I'm not a fan. Not a fan of this.

I just find that area, not from stink or anything like that. Yeah. It's just a, I don't know. It's a weird position. I was friends with a girl once who her boyfriend had an armpit fetish, like Licking. During. I am not going to judge. No, I did.

I'm not going to judge. I was like, what, sorry? He does what now? She's like, yeah, I got him going, so I just let it roll. So he liked to lick hers. Yes, yes. Particularly after a certain... During a session.

I was going to say, like, after a long day at work or a session at the gym or something. And she's not particularly hygienic, so... That must be weird. A weird feeling. Did she have, if she had remnants of her Reksona on, is he just getting a tongue full of chemicals? I don't know, or is it all natural? Is it all natural?

Maybe he's like, can you let it go or natural? Let it go. Because this new study out of Japan has scientists had men, smell women's armpits and discover that their body odor can subtly sway male behavior and help males relax. Oh, here we go. This is some pheromones stuff, is it? Imagine saying up to this case study.

Oh, my God. We need 10 people, all you're doing all day. You're getting good money. You're just smelling armpits. Would you rather be the sniffer or the armpit? I'd rather be the armpit. You'd rather be the armpit. I don't think I want to sniff bulk armpits all day.

Because you don't know who you're going to get. That's true. You know, help them relax. So do they, you know, take men off the stock market, that crazy sell, sales. Hey, guys, come over here. Come on in. Does this make you relax? Smell this.

Smell this. Apparently, it's based around the women's menstrual cycle. So the armpit has different odors based when it comes into the cycle. You are the expert on the Luteel face. Am I? Gave us that trivia question about that one time. I now associate Luteil with Duck Men. Hang on.

So when it's shark week, is it more conjoint? Yeah, or ovulating. So when you're like in that sort of period, whether it's right before. I don't know. How bad's that, I don't know. I think it's in the middle. Isn't ovulation in the middle? Yeah.

Hey, there you are. Nice. Didn't even need to Google it. Well done, Babbs. Okay, so when you're ovulating, can men smell it? They can be manipulated more by women's behavior. They can also be more calm, relaxed. And apparently, they found the women who,

were ovulating and had that armpit. They found them more attractive. Shut up. That is the most primal thing I've ever heard. We are wired to reproduce. So there's something in our noses that is going, hmm. Yeah, I want this.

There's something about this. I want. She's good to go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so apparently say, imagine me the woman who's nowhere near menstrual cycle. And they're like, oh, no. That's just steep.

Yeah, get Penelope out of here. That's crazy. Yeah, it's apparently it's a full study. It's a full thing. The University of Tokyo has done. done this. Oh, and we trust them. I mean, they've pinpointed the body odor compounds to three different things that fluctuate through the menstrual cycle and spike during ovulation. Wow. So, try with Gussie.

I actually want to know if he could maybe pick it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. Give it a sniff. I'll give it a sniff. Get in here, Dad. We want to help. We want to help plan your next family getaway, maybe your next couple's adventure. Hey, maybe you've got a honeymoon on the horizon. Ibiza. Ibiza? Ibiza. Summer Villas. Ibifa. Ibifa.

A bea. Summer Villas. They are a property rental company, Ducko. Yeah. And they've commissioned a study. I mean, good on these guys. Good old Ibifa. Have you seen the bloke out of Ibitha getting around who's trending the Ibitha final boss?

No, what's that? Oh, he looks like the Lego man. He's got like the really bold hair. He's a real person. He's a real person. He's just filmed an Ibitha by his partner. Yes. They're like, Ibitha final boss has been unlocked and he's just gone viral.

Yeah. Is he a tourist or is he a local? He's just a. He's just a dude. Look. Oh, my. He's got a big gold chain and he's got the silver. He has the biggest bowl cut you've ever seen and he looks like the biggest brus.

Sorry, is that his hair? That's his hair. That's not a cap. Yeah. It looks like he's wearing almost like a pinkie line. It looks like, so they've made like all these like they made fake look. I know. And he's just dancing.

His girlfriend filmed it. And then apparently it's just blown up. And then he got like a private jet from Ibitha. They're flying him back to a DJ set like him and his mates. Do you know where he's from? Newcastle in the UK. Oh my God. He's British.

And he's just his British Bogan. Oh, because I'm Bifa. I'm Bifa. It's a huge party destination for young Brits. It's like Al Barley. Yeah, yeah. I've just never seen anything take off just from one guy being filmed on a D floor. Have you seen it, Babs?

Yeah, I tried to explain this to Shaga yesterday. You told me to shut up. Shagga's not the Obie the final boss. Shagga's the O'Beefer, like first boss. He is. He's the doormat. Can you imagine Shagai ever going to a place like I beat? I can't.

Imagine him surviving if he did go. Yeah. Isn't that the world we live in, though? Four seconds of vision, and it blows up millions of views. Now he's getting all this star. And it's sad. It's like the hock tour girl. He probably thinks now this has made my life.

I'm going to get really rich. Maybe this will open doors. Oh, babe, that's already died down. Like, everyone's moved on. Give it a week. So, yes, the Ibiza, summer villas. They're a property rental company. They're trying to help you decide where your next holiday or vacation will be based on stress.

Oh, good. They want you to avoid the most stress. stressful cities in the world, so they've done a huge ranking, 51 of the world's most visited tourist destination, tourist density, crime rates, humidity, search trends, and the frequency at which visitor reviews mention stress. So maybe the local landmark or the restaurant scene, whatever it is. Yeah. I'll run you quickly through the top 10.

Coming in at number 10, I probably can agree, but I think it's part of the charm. Rome, Italy, the capital of Italy. Yes, it is stressful over there. People who say they don't like Rome. because it's busy, irk me. Of course it's busy. It is amazing tourist destination.

The Pope's there. And the Pope is there. Everyone's got to see Le Pop, Le Pop, Le Pop. A hop, skip and a jump. While, the Vatican has not made the top ten. Vatican, quite stress-free. It was a the Pope! Number nine, Cairo, Egypt, eight, Hong Kong, China.

Seven, London. Oh, yeah. Totally get that. The hustle and bustle, and it's a relatively small place. Getting the tube everywhere. It's hot. 100%. Another place I have been, with my family, actually.

You should have seen Rob Farch commanding the streets of Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia. Great shopping destination. But yes, stressful, mainly the humidity. Oh my God, it'll kill you. Jeez, you'd struggle. Can you imagine? Maybe my dad both run very hot.

Number five, Ho Chi Min in Vietnam. Number four, Berlin, Germany for stress. Rounding out the top three. Here we go. Shanghai, China. Now, I think we could have guessed one of the Chinese cities would have made it up there for stress. Just busy. Population.

Easy, absolutely. Coming at number two, this has actually surprised me. Hanoi in Vietnam. I would have thought Vietnam would be really chill. Isn't as, as would I. A couple of my best mates are Vietnamese, and they are really relaxed women. And on my case study of three people, I thought Vietnam would also reflect that. But coming in at number one.

What do we got? With 47.5 million tourists squeezed into just a 105 square kilometers, doesn't leave much room for relaxing in Paris, France. No way, not my place. The most stressful city to visit on holiday, apparently. I'd attest to that. France is, Paris is chaotic. France is the number one most visited country in the world,

Ducco. It's held that title for ages, and obviously because Paris is the jewel of the country, the most stressful. I reckon it's because the people are mean. Like, stereotypically, French do not care if you're trying to speak French. They've got no time for tourists.

And again, very generalising. And if you try and say, like, Bonjour, they just look at you to hate it. Because they get so many tourists so regularly. They're worn down. one memory of Paris. It was my first time like overseas on my own with a boyfriend at the time. We chose the city of love. Yeah, yeah. It's not romantic either. It's not. Did you go to the Lovelock bridge where you put a lock on it? Yeah. I actually think that's what we were trying to find. And we thought,

who can we ask? Everyone's hustle and bustle. And you think every second person's a tourer. So why would they know? Yeah. We'll ask a police officer. Oh, yeah. They're sworn to help and protect. The judgment and the, just, he was so cold and so rude. I'm pretty sure he went, look at Yeah, yeah, Google it, idiot. It might have been in French. Like, I don't actually know what he said. He certainly didn't help us. Yeah, yeah.

He probably just said forget and just got out of there. Probably. Yeah. We've been here for three hours and that's the welcome to Paris. Yeah. It is very stressful. It is stressful. And going to the Apple Tower, it's so busy.

Oh, you've just got the people trying to flog your red roses and souvenirs. Let alone the pickpockets and the crime, which comes with such a touristy place. Yeah. So there you go. If you're considering Paris, France, for, yes, maybe a honeymoon or a getaway or God forbid a family holiday. Family holiday would be a tough character. Maybe. Imagine trying to give a 10-year-old frog legs?

Oh. Can I just have chicken nuggets? I've been to Paris twice. I've never eaten frog legs. Fair enough. What about snails? I did eat snail. How was that?

I did eat snail once. I don't remember being that bad. Really? I didn't think I'd taste like chicken. Yeah. It's kind of like oystery for me. Oh, gross. That's not a good thing.

Jess and ducco in the morning. Jess and ducos 10K alpha bucks on hit. 30 seconds, 10 questions also with the same letter. You have to pay your first answer. Can't use the same answer twice if you're unsure of the question. You say pass. Of course, we come back if there's time. We're playing for $10,000.

Our player today is Ozzy. Hello, Ozzie. Morning, guys, how are we? Mate, couldn't be better. It's day too back from professional development. Oh, yeah. Unfortunately, we haven't given away the $10,000 yet. But it's early.

Early days. It's fine. Yeah. Ozzie, are you going to be that person to take it off us? I hope so. Yes. I heard you. last segment, and I was like, maybe this is a, you know, the calling for the misses wants

to do a lope. She wants to know on holidays. Oh, all right. Well, make sure you take Paris off the list, Ozzy. It's too stressful. Don't go to Paris, man. Actually, I have the list here of the least stressful really quickly. Oh, here it is.

I would not have picked that. Neither. Would not have picked that. Also, would not have picked that. I would pick somewhere Nordic. Pitch those to the misses as your elopement destination, Ozzie, when you win the 10 grand, of course. Yeah, make it easy for me, hey.

Absolutely. Yeah, love it. Got a good vibe about, Ozzy. So do I. He's a man of business. Absolutely. The letter you're going to work with, babe, it's solid. It's tea.

Tea for terrific. Yep. Okay, you ready to go? Tuesday. Tuesday. That's even better. We love Tuesdays. We do love Tuesday's great attitude, Duckow.

Thank you. Your time will start after the first question. Ozzie, you're ready? Yep. All right. Starting with letter T, we need you to name an animal. Tiger. A periodic element.

Titanium. An electronics brand? Tesla. A band? Um, the living end. A verb. Throwing. A condiment.

Tomato sauce. A director. Director. Oh, geez. Pass. A horror movie. The Shining. A Mexican food.

Tarkas. A video game. Oh. Mate, you are elite. You were elite. You were very. I can do so much better when the pressure's not on. Oh, I tell you what.

Did you have anything for video game? I guess you'd just go with tea, but yeah, no, nothing that comes straight ahead. There's Tomb Raider or the last of us, of course, turned into a TV show. But, mate, you got everything you answered was correct. Because, Ozzy, you have been paying attention, my friend. I can tell. With tea, you can use the. Yeah, yeah.

So you just nailed those. People get really panicky about that, but Aussie was bam, bam, bam, bam. There were tough ones in there too. They were. I went blank on Tiger and wasted too much time enough. No, no, that's what you made up for it. No one gets periodic element, my friend, well done. Now, the only one you missed was a director, which could have been a Taika or Wattiki, or it could have been Tim Burton.

Of course. Yeah, I think of a tent lasso, but... Oh, the show, yeah, the show. Look, a great showing, Oz. You don't get to go to Paris, but you do get 100 old to spend... Or Dubai or me, Nick. You get 100 old to spend at Temple and Webster. Imagine the glow-up you could give your home with 40% off furniture,

homewares and renovations, templarwebson.com.com.com. That is all yours. Thanks, guys. May, you were fantastic. Hold that head up high. Thanks for joining the show. What we'll do. Have a good day.

What a legend. That was elite showing. I thought we were on there. So did I. Anyway. Titanium. Datta yes. Welcome to it.

If you're just joining us as well. Shagai not in today. He's, I don't know. Taken the P. Yeah, he's moving house. So we're crossing to him. We're going to call him about 20 minutes past seven. We just had three weeks off, Ducco, and he booked the moving truck for 7am on a workday.

Interesting, isn't it? We finish at 9. And I understand. Well, he said he puts in big days. I appreciate that. Could he not have taken an hour, 9.30? Yeah. Maybe tacked on that hour in the afternoon.

Hey, delegate. Yeah. I could have helped out. You could have. I could have. Imagine you moving house. No, I meant whatever delegation he needed. Yeah, like if he had an email to respond to, I could have done that.

You could have done that, yeah, yeah, for sure. Anyway, stuff him. Wouldn't have. Anyway, it's time for this. Hey, it's Babs, and this is my blog. Commence Operation Superstar Bratsley. Babs is in studio. She's also boss lady today.

Oh, yeah. Good morning, Babs. Good morning. You are unflappable. You have just been. There's not a sweat that has arisen on your brow. Yeah, it's all internal. Yeah.

She's internally raging. Everything's fine. Have you noticed how many times she's now saying, fine? It's fine. It had concerned me yesterday. She dropped it about three times. I went, have they been hanging out over the break? Because why?

God, no. God forbid. I can't even get Babs to respond in the group chat. I don't think you're hanging out. You are boss lady. You're running the phones. You're organising the alpha box. But you also have your blog.

I do, yeah. And you gave us the headline that you had a Jess moment. I did. Over the break, your spirit. It came into me, and I did something really strange. You two are polar opposite people. Could be more different if you try. All we have in common.

Yeah, is that you do radio. Oh, no, I was going to say that we get... Oh, they get laser. The downstairs. We bonded over our laser. To be fair, even that is weird, that you've got that in common? I know. Because we also just realised this morning, we might actually have had the same technician.

We went to the same... I went to where Babs is going, granted, five years ago. Yeah. The same technician may have seen both our bits. That's a pretty cool thing. The lady actually asked me yesterday where I work, and I was like, oh, oh, in promotion somewhere. I'm an accountant. But yes, we have very little in common.

We get along, of course. Yes, we do. Very little in common. So what has happened? Okay, to set the scene, I'm watching Avengers and eating fish and chips with my boyfriend and his housemate and his housemate's girlfriend. Okay. So these people don't spend enough. time with me to know how funny I can be sometimes.

Oh, they don't really know the bad friend. You've got to get to know you, to know the comedy, the humour of bats. So usually I'm quite, like, I wouldn't say, I'm quite, not reserved, but, you know, they're more of an introvert. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't really say a lot. You only give someone the blurb until they really know you, then you'll let them read the book. Do you know what she is?

She's like, you don't deserve the full picture. Yes. Until I can work out, you've earned it. Yeah. I'm going to hold back a bit. 100%. Yeah. Well, we're just laying on the lounge watching Avengers.

Like, it was just a rainy day. You know, everyone, some of them are hung over. Like, everyone's very quiet. And we're watching Avengers. And someone on the screen says, you're a monster. You're a totally, like, you know, normal voice. Me, it's completely silent, goes, you're a monster. Oh, you're a monster.

Because the grab that we always play from Shrek, the gingerbread man. Yes, so I just quoted a movie. So you did a nice niche quote. It went silent. Everyone looked at me and said nothing. I then felt like I wanted to play. punched myself in the face. Bab.

That's just far too niche. When the spirit, and I like that you use that word, when the spirit overcomes, you forget your surroundings. I know. If I was at work, people would have laughed. We would have laughed.

Did you reckon you said that quote because I play it so much on the show and it was in your head? I literally had a bleed and it just came out. And I was like, I would never do that. I think it's not even that niche. I think it's quite funny. But no one laughed.

And I see, spoken like a true, you're forgetting the real world. You're in the vortex. with us. Yeah. Yeah, I see it. Her cool band boyfriend and his mates and the girlfriend, they're not like us. Do they know the quote?

Oh, I don't know because everyone just looked at me and said nothing. And I was like, oh, okay. Jethra's like, I'm so sorry about her. She's been spending a lot of time with Jess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how it feels to be Jess. I know. That's where my brain went.

I was like, wow, this is how Jess must feel all the time. When we meet her. I've never felt close to a sweet bad. Like, look at you two tonight. Lays up. Yeah, quoting movies together. Another thing to have you. Wow.

Let's move, gals. Jess and Ducco. Ducco right now, you've heard of my big fat Greek wedding. Yes. But have you heard of my big fat fake Indian wedding? That's the sequel, yeah? That's the first one. No, there's already three, my big fat great weddings.

That's three too many. The third one was so bad. Oh, the third one was so bad. The first one is a masterpiece. How it didn't win best picture is beyond me. Yeah, yeah. Tula. There's a couple of people that liked it.

You and the Greeks. No one else. Is that with Nick Geinopoulos? Nick, Nick. That's a log boy. You've got your Greeks mixed up. My bad. I've come across really bad there. I apologize.

They're not all the same. The Wog Boy, though. That's got to be my top five films. I appreciate Nick Giannopoulos getting a mention on this show. You can see why I put Greek waiting a Wog Boy in the same. I actually can't. They are vastly different. I was going to quote,

I'm withholding because we need to get to my big, fat, fake Indian wedding. Yes. I need you to get inside the Gen Z of India because I can't really understand what they're doing with this. You know me, I love to jump on a trend. I love something that sizzles fast and bright and then it goes away, that's fine. I can't really understand this trend. We all love a wedding. Of course, they are joyful, they are fun, but Gen Z in India have decided they're a bit too stressful.

Yeah. How can we take the stress out of attending a wedding, having to deal with maybe family or relatives that we don't really like and just capture the vibe and the party element, the essence. But isn't like the vibe of a wedding, the fact that you're celebrating love? Like, it's like a fun... Thank you. So what they're doing, hotels and large clubs across Delhi, Mumbai and Bengaluru, they are putting on wedding theme party nights. So they are ticketed, about 1,500 rupees, it's only about 17 bucks. But you get dressed up, dressed to the nines, and in India that might be the traditional sari

or the beautiful suits that the Indian gentlemen wear. Yeah, they go all out. They go all out. But it's basically the wedding party without the ceremony or without a couple. You're just there to have a kind of wedding without a wedding. So no one gets married. There's no fake couple. It's all, and it's strangers.

Like it could be you and your mates, but it could be me and my mates. It's open to the public. But the idea is it's like a wedding without the stress. And anyone can go. So it becomes essentially it's like going to an event. It's literally a night out. It's $17 to go to an event, dress up like you go to a wedding and celebrate nothing but fun. Exactly.

People are saying at family weddings, there's so much pressure. The rules around dressing up, the judgment from relatives. But here it's just fun. Especially we get to do it with all our friends. We decide our outfits the day before. We get ready together, but we don't need to worry about gifts. We don't need to worry about some of the ceremonies in Indian culture can be three, four days long. See, that's the fun of it, though.

That's what I think. I think that's the best part of the wedding. Weddings are so stressful. Nothing breaks a family apart or, you know, can my uncle's new partner come or my cousin's new girlfriend of two weeks be there? We had RSVPs from people who just put their girlfriend's name. It's like, nah, bro, you were invited. Not your girlfriend. Shock horror, you broke up two months after the wedding.

That's annoying. We had that so many cousins as well. Oh, it's my new partner. I love him so much. Yeah, he was gone a couple weeks later. Then you're trying to cut them out of all the pictures or Photoshop them out. I get it. But that's all part of it.

That's a part of the wedding. That's part of the stress. If you want to have a wedding and you want to host it, and everyone's going to come and bring you gifts and celebrate you, that's part of it. And this is not just me, speaking, because I am a marriage celebrate now. But even that element of it, the love story, as you said, celebrating the history of the couple to get to this point, it's part of it.

It makes the shin dig after it even better, even more. joyful. Even more, you want to crack out the shots and the, and the food and that celebration and hit the dance floor. Because you've had that romantic, you know, beautiful part at the start. They are expensive, though. Like, I was just telling you. They're not $17, that's for sure. I was telling you off there about my sister's weddings coming up next month. I'm now, I've been called in to be groomsmen because she added in an extra bridesmaid, so he had to match it. So we just asked me. I'm like number six. And then I'm emceeing it as stock standard. Why not? That is no surprise.

And it's away in Bar and Bay. So everything is so expensive. You're going to a wedding and not working is the surprise. Oh, goodness gracious. So you've got the travel. You've got obviously suit, I'm assuming. You've got to all get. Yeah.

Are you getting a gift as well? Like it's your sister. You've got to give a gift. My gift is my embassy work. I said tomorrow, I was like, it's unpaid labour. That's very fair. Oh, let alone. Hang on.

Now you've obviously your wife's going, you've got to work out. You've got to work out. Oh, we've had to pay for her parents to come too because they've got to mind it. Because your parents will obviously be invited. And Flo's not invited She's not allowed to come to the wedding Your sister To the ceremony

Doesn't want your kid Like her niece Yeah So because she's so young She's so young Which also like it doesn't matter She won't remember it No

But the other side of the family Has a baby that want them there And my sister didn't want them So now it's like a blanket Oh so no babies at all Yeah yeah yeah It's bizarre We get it

But again as I said It's all part of it It's what makes the party part So much better Exactly But if you want to pop over to as I said Delhi Mumbai or Bengalaroo and just have the party without the stress.

Be a good time. That could be an option for Laura and Alex, maybe. Remove the stress. Don't worry about Byron Bay. It's certainly too late now. The deposit has been paid. Okay. Yeah, it's very much been paid.

Hey, still to come. Of course, Alfa Bucks, but we are calling the Shy Lord next. That's right. Taking the day off to move house allegedly. Yeah, we don't, you know. We just, there's holes in the story. There's a bit of mail. We want to talk to the removals.

If they're not there, oh-ha, if they haven't packed down the coffee table and the bedroom suite. They'll be held to pay. Now, one of the members of this team is taking the absolute piss for day two. Couldn't agree more. We just had three weeks off, Ducko. Three weeks. You and I spent it professionally developing overseas.

It was meant to be two, but we all took another week of my paternity leave. You're so kind. So really. So kind to have spread the laugh for the team, you know. But over that time, Ducco, you know, whilst I was professionally developing, I also got some life admin out the way so I could hit the ground running once I returned. you know, to make sure focus was back solely on this career of ours. I know you did the same.

I think I can speak for Babs. Well, Babs worked the whole time and then cry because her boyfriend was away. She actually didn't take a break. But one member of the team thought, nah, I'll save some life admin for once we return and just take a day off. Take a day in lieu. Day two after returning from a break. You knew he was stressed about moving house before our show went on break?

Yeah, he got flicked out of his place. And I understand that adds a level of anxiety. and where am I going to live or am I going to sleep, yada, yada. He was outraged. It was outraged. But he secured something. Yeah, you got something. And thought, you know when I'll move all my stuff?

Yeah. On a Tuesday at 7 a.m. Instead of maybe asking, hey, could you come at 9.30? Just post 9. Hey, Ducko, can I take you up on the offer that you so vehemently suggested and said, I'll help your brother? I'll do it. I'll pay some people.

I'll pay some people. So we go to him now. Mr. Shilord, good morning. This is absolute slander, guys. I couldn't help the day that I'm moving out. You know, after 7 a.m. is all you need to say. After 9 is all you need to tell them. No one's arguing you couldn't pick a Tuesday.

Pick a Tuesday, darling, it's fine. You couldn't have picked 9 to 30. Well, I drive a Monday, but they weren't available. Oh, you drive for the day one? So, okay, are the builders there yet? They said they were coming at 7. Yes, they just rocked up. Yeah, yeah.

Put them on the phone. Yeah, I want to speak to one. Who have you got there? No, I'm not, no, I'm not putting me on the throat. Yes, you are. I'd just say it's your mom and dad. We don't believe that they're saying. Yeah, because right now we think you're on a menti B day.

How'd is not true? I might need one after this and talking to you guys. What's their names? Yeah, yeah. What's their names? Prussian and Fabrizio, I think. We put Fabrizio on. I want to speak this year.

Just tell them to your mom and dad. He might be a long loss relative of mine. You don't know. I'm assuming. No, I'm not doing that. They could be fans of the show. They could be rice cookers. They know what you do?

You are denied? I'm the chance to speak to Justin Ducco. Yeah. Thank you, well, you are on in the house and they're moving it. I'm sitting in my car right now, pretending I'm doing the work. Oh, hang on. So, can they hear this? We're in about two minutes because of their delay, but yeah.

Sure, Fabrizio. Foribrizio. No. Call us for Brizio. We need you. We do not believe there is anyone in Shagai's house right now. Where did you say you are hiding in the car? I'm in my car.

Are you not even helping them? No, I told them I had a work meeting. Oh, well, yeah. The meeting is to put them on. the phone. That's what we want. There is no proof of life. You know what?

They're on the clock. Shagga is judging them hard. He told me that it's an hourly rate and they've got to get it done quick. And he's got all those toys to move. I need those back, Shagga. That's why he didn't want you. Oh, that's right. That's why you're mine.

That's what you don't want. No, my. Your toys being cleaned. It's all fun. I'll return that later. Thank you. That gets a separate removalist truck. It needs its own truck in itself.

Oh, yeah. Are they moving to your standards? Ah, yeah. So far they're great. He has to say that because he's got the radio on the house. You can't bitch about him. I'm really disappointed. You're not going to put them on the phone.

Yeah, I just don't believe that there's anyone there. If you needed a day off, you can just ask for one. We'll still give you crap. Yeah, obviously. But, like, be honest. Yeah, yeah. We'll say you have diarrhea or something. Oh, the scabies flare up.

The scape, oh, we love when you. You've got a permanent excuse still. Yeah. I, you know, well, I was expecting other excuses all morning. I've been listening and, no, you've just been not. He's just not coming in. He's not true at all. Poor Babs is stressed to her eyeballs.

Oh, she's fine. It's good for a development. No, I just pulled out a clump of hair. And she's got thin hair. She has no hair. She doesn't have any follicles to spare. She doesn't put her back. And she's got cowgirl boots in today as well.

I've not noticed her boots. Have you tried to see any of her boots? She'll chuck your leg off. How low yellow stone. Yeah, she did the classic thing. She drew my attention to them because she knew I was going to take the piss. So she was like, I was surprised you haven't noticed. She told me yesterday she was very excited to wear the boots today.

Well, I'm not going to be there, though I don't care. They're power boots. Oh, well, this has been absolutely lacklost. This has been a monumental waste of our time. Oh, my God. We should have just played year of the song. Jess and Duckow. Right now, Ducko, I'm going to challenge you

to decipher something that my brother is, and I quote, very, very passionate about it. He said, changed his life. Okay. Takes a lot to get my brother very excited. Growing up, it was probably the biggest difference between us. I would carry on and get excited over the smallest minutia of life. Take a lot.

Take a lot to get him with a double thumbs up. Yeah. Our relationship now in as adult, he loves a voice memo. He's a voice memoer and he's one of the few people I'll allow it. Because we don't talk that often on the phone. Feels like a bit of a chat. It feels like a bit of a chat. It's nice to hear his voice and catch up.

But he sent me a voice memo that had my eyes popping out of my head. I've never heard him this passionate. Okay. about a recent purchase. Now, his voice memo basically went on to say, you need it. It has changed my life for the better. You also need it.

Okay. So what I've done is record the voice memo and bleeped out... The product. The product. Now, a little tricky for you, because not only do, I want you to decipher what the product is, he's that passionate. There's a couple of swears.

So I've also had to bleep out the swears. So don't let that confuse you. Will I know this product? I hope this isn't a clue. It's a normal product But there's almost like been an advancement In this technology He's just purchased this thing

Advanced version of something Every single person on the planet Would know This is what my brother was talking about It's changed my life It's changed my life It's a new era of AI technology And I'm on board

And started off a little bit Because at about five or six guys And trying to connect the blue tooth and I'm like, yep, they suck me in. This is a loaded shit. It's like a kid's Batman belt with those crappy little things that come in it and they don't really work and it's sold as this big eye, but it doesn't live up to expectations. But once I fucking got it connected, oh my God, it's just everything you could ever imagine. Imagine you want a d'u K and you just, nah, how many

went begging because you just couldn't be asked getting up off the couch? But now, with the magic of this technology, you just click the button. And b-hies have never tasted better. Oh, tasted technology. Get off the couch. Yes. I'm trying to work out what... It was very passionate.

That is the most passionate. Yeah, yeah. My brother is two years younger. He's 32. Yeah. I have never heard him like that. Trying to think, get off the couch. He doesn't need to get off the couch.

You can taste it. Mm-hmm. So it's obviously something to do with food, but it's only you can press a button that helps you get it? Yes. Now, you've thrown yourself already off. It's not food. Oh, okay.

He's just meaning tastes like... It's a beverage. Oh. He's not making food with this product. It's a beverage. Again, I feel like I've given you the bumps here. Is it like one of those things that makes fizzy water? You're in the right realm.

Right. I've also realized I've given you the bubble. bumsteer because the bleeps had to bleep the product, but also what the product makes. Oh, yeah. I mean, this is a tough carry for me. And I realise I don't have the unedited, unbleaves, so I'm going to have to tell you. So, okay, it's not a fizzy water. No, but you're flirting with it.

Oh, did you get a fridge that has the water thing in the middle? You're flirting with it. It's an appliance. It is an appliance. Is it, what's another appliance? That makes a beverage? Oh, is it a slushy? Like a ninja slushy.

No, it makes a hot beverage. Oh, a coffee machine. No. Go, go, just tell me. It's a kettle. What? My brother. What kettle is it?

It's a Bluetooth kettle, so it connects to an app so you can hit boil. So that's why he's making his tea. He is a big tea drinker growing up. We were all tea drinkers. In fact, if you drew the shorts raw, you had to make the family teas. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're all watching TV. We are big tea drinkers.

And he is saying how many teas have got. begging because you couldn't be asked getting off the couch to boil the kettle, whereas now he has the app and on his drive home ducker, he can go, start boiling. I know I'm six minutes from home. So I'll hit boil by the time I pull into the driveway.

So he's going to pre-fill it up, so you know there's water in it. Yes. And so it's always filled. The AI tech hasn't quite gotten to walking the kettle to the tap. How far away from the kettle do you have to be? I would have thought you need to be in the Bluetooth vicinity. I didn't ask.

Can you do it from driving home? He needs to be on the cab. Well, he told me there were subsequent voicemen. messages. He does it from just the app. He does it from just the app. But yes, most of the time, it's on the couch. So he's in the middle of his Netflix show. And he just goes, I'm going to boil the kettle. He goes, it has changed my life. What brand is it? Do you know? He sent me the link. I'll get it up for you. He's what I say, yeah. He has sent me, honestly. That was while we were away. Okay. So it's been a while. That's some passion right there. Every couple

of days, Ducko, he has text me. Have you bought? The kettle. Does it make you want one? It does make me want one. I kind of want one now. I actually have never not made myself a tea because I couldn't be asked. It's the easiest appliance to turn on, right? It's the ceremony of doing it.

It's the ceremony of doing it. I've never had a tea gone wanting, but his passion, you know, I love a passionate recommendation, whether it's a restaurant or a service. This product and the passion from my, it's a Kogan, Smarter Home, 1.7 litre. What does that set you back, though? How much is he spent on a kettle? Because there is definitely too much money to buy in a kettle. What do you think is too much?

Oh, okay. Uh, geez, I think our kettle's like 20 bucks from Kmart. Oh, okay. This is significantly more than that, but not, but not, it's not even over 100. Oh, okay. I was going to say, is it 60? $69.99. That's good enough to get me.

Like that, I feel like I only have like herbal teas, but I still want one. Fast dispatch leaves the warehouse in one to two. Your birthday's coming up. Maybe I can see if I can get a two for one deal. Oh, wow. The passion. The passion We should get one for this team in the mornings

Can you imagine? Even though we don't have tea in the morning We don't have tea in the morning We don't have to get along It's nice to know We never have tea We may have coffee I think I'm finally on board with AI

If this is how it's changing our lives Faster T's I had a peak Classic marriage moment Last night we get into bed Is there anything worse When you get into bed You're about to go to sleep

I find my wife does this a lot And speaking to other blokes I find they also agree That their partners do this you're just about to go to sleep and then all of a sudden it's, bang, have serious important conversation. And you're like, can you not right now?

Like all of a sudden Morgan's like looking at things we need to buy that are not urgent or... For me, it's not so much at the point of going to sleep but it's at the point where Angus is just like exhausted or he's had this massive day. He's jet lagged at the moment and I've now trained myself to start asking, are you in the mood for a conversation? Can I have a chat?

Well, that would be nice. Last night, Morgan basically realized that this morning she's going for coffee with a friend, and that the pram is in the boot of my car, the car's parked outside. Hang on, you're in bed. You're in bed. It's about 9.15. I'm trying to doze off. And Morgan's like, oh, I'm like, what is it? And she's like, I need the pram. The pram's in your car. I need it for tomorrow morning. And it looks at me. I was like, well, I'm not getting up now to go outside of the street to get the pram and bring it in. And like, flows asleep. I'm about to go to bed. And she's like, but I really need it.

And I was like, remember those vows you made? Morgan, why didn't you think of this earlier? I was like, okay, I'll get the pram out tomorrow morning. She's like, don't forget, I'm going to text you. I'm going to text you. So you see your text tomorrow morning. I'll text you right now. So you see it in the morning.

Great. Sends the text. We got to sleep. Whatever, eventually drift off. I wake up the next day, having my shower. Look at my phone. Great, there it is. Pram.

I'm tiptoeing around the house. I tiptoe outside. I get the pram. I bring the pram in. Then I hear up. What are you doing? Shut up. What did you forget?

Why are you coming back in? Why are you being so loud? I was like, I'm getting you the pram. And she goes, oh yeah, love you. Thanks. It's like, what more do you want from me? You should have done it last night. Jess and Ducko in the morning.

Jess and Ducko's 10K Alfa Bucks on Hint. 30 seconds to answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. I have to take your first answer. Can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. Of course, we come back if there is time. We are playing for $10,000, but you know that. Don't you, Chantel?

Good morning. Good morning. Shantel, what's motivating you today, babe? What do you want to spend 10,000 buckaroos on? I just want to get away and go on a holiday. Yeah, I love that. Go find some sun. Yeah, well, we developed professionally.

We had to take three weeks off. I need to go and develop. Yes, good, okay. Hey, I'm sure your company will love it. Absolutely. Then it becomes a tax right off. You know? Totally.

Because what you're doing is trying to get better at your job. Shantelle, let's waste no more time. I don't want you to freak out when you hear the letter. Anything towards the back end of the alphabet,

I think gets people a little bit nervous. Does, yeah. And you are at the very back. You're going to work with the letter Z. Oh, geez. Okay. Come on. No, freaking out.

All right, pump it up. Start with Z. Exactly. Z, Z. I think we say Z. Zism. Well, that's not confusing, Shantel. Sorry, Shaq, don't listen to me.

I haven't developed professionally well enough. You've got Ed Shear and on the break. Yeah, I do. I do. Chantelle, are you ready to rock? All right, I'll give it a crack. That's all you can ask. Your time will start after the first question.

Starting with the letter Zed, we need you to name. A country. Zimbabwe? A clothing brand. Path. An actor. Zach Ephron. A periodic element.

Buh. Path. An adjective. Stop pass A three-letter word Zick Something you study Can I say zoology?

A KFC item Oh, no Zingerberger There it is Just in time too To get yourself four Oh There's a few passes

Let's go through them A clothing brand could have been Zah or Zimmerman, a periodic element, zinc. An adjective could have been zen, zealous, or zippy. I'd describe you as zippy. Zippy, yeah, I feel zippy. When you're wearing red, you're zippy.

Oh, I'm so fast. I need more developing. I was sitting on zinc going, hang on, is it Zed? Like, I questioned my brain. Then you would have had it too. And then, I'm not going to say Zip, three-letter word, Zik. Did you say Zik? Zip?

I don't know what you said. Zik. Zik. I don't know. I mean, it could have been Zit. Could have been Zin. Zip. Zip.

Now, actually, when you really think about the Z, it does confuse you a bit for Donald. Start to the Z and what does it. Now that I'm really getting into the weeds with it. Ah, well, look. More developing to be had. More developing to be had. That's great.

And on someone else's dollar. And you don't go away, empty-handed, Chantel. $100 to spend at Temple and Webster. Imagine the Globe. You could give your home with up to 40% of furniture, homewares and renovations. Temple and Webster.com.com. That's all yours.

Awesome. Thanks, guys. Thanks for joining the show, Chantel. So no $10,000 to give away today, Ducco. Yeah. But more chances at the double pass. Oh, yes. To see the Galway girl's boyfriend.

Oh, Ed Sheeran. Hey? You got a chance next, Ducko. Yeah. I didn't know you could break that is what my husband said after he broke something in a hotel room. What did he break? That's scallywag. Jess and Ducko.

In 1060, right now, we're asking, did you break the unbreakable? That's right. My husband said to himself, I didn't know you could break that. We recently spent three weeks of professional development in the motherland. We're over in Italy. Yes. It was a challenging, wonderful time. Challenge is key word.

Mainly because we have a nearly two-year-old. Yeah, it's a tough age to travel. I mean, it's, yeah. She had nothing to do with this incident, though. This was purely A.J. Harps. Now, it's funny, I just said to you off air, I think I'll bring the rice cookers in to this. I said, oh, babe, I need to talk about this. But I know, you know, I rip the piss out of you enough.

I'll change it, I'll tweak it. I'll say, oh, I didn't. He went, that's all right. I'll own up to it. Oh, okay. Because I think almost he's proud. Yes. Because it displays maybe an epic feat of strength.

I didn't know you could break this thing, Ducko. I'm about to send you a video of what he did to our hotel room in Florence. We are in this beautiful, beautiful old, I think it used to be, what did they tell us? It was like the mistress's palazzo of some rich dude of, Florence, like he bought her this amazing, amazing, like homestead to house the mistress. So it's epic, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're in one of these rooms.

And what happens when you're two and a half weeks into a trip, right? You start running out of clothes, clean clothes. We don't really want to waste an hour or two at a laundromat. So you start doing a bit of a bathroom basin wash, okay? I had done my undies. Get the skitties out. You get the skitties out. You know, he'd bought some detergent.

Put that in. No worries. I did my undies. I was like, oh, everything else. I've packed enough. I'll just do some undies. He's like, all right, my turn, can you get out? I was like, I'm happy to do yours.

He goes, I'll do them myself. It's fine. He doesn't think my level of cleanliness. Oh, that's probably more it. I don't think he thinks my level of cleanliness is up to his standard. Turns out it's not because he loaded the sink with some undies and I think maybe two t-shirts. The way he tried to wash his clothes, I just sort of let mine soak. Yeah, just let them sit in there.

And then wrung them out and hung them up over the towel rack. Yeah. he was pushing down on them, almost like Bell in Beauty and the Beast. You know where they drag them along that old school plank of wood? I mean, are you hitting me with a beauty? You know what I'm talking about that's all right? You know, back in the day, she'd be on the side of the river with that plank of wood. It almost looks like a shutter.

Yeah, it's almost like he was doing that. Yeah, old school. In the basin, he's really, I guess, trying to create a washing machine vibe, It really dirating everything and rinsing them out, pushing down. And I just hear, oh, God, and this clunk. Now, I've sent you the video. What he's done is completely bust the basin through the bench. Yeah, it's popped through underneath.

It's popped through. He must have really been given that some heat. He was really taking out some frustration from that holiday. Oh, I love holiday with my wife and two years. year old, there goes the sink. That may have been it's like, to describe it, it's like the sink has popped through the middle and it's

fallen down underneath the cabinet. Yes, yes. It's literally inside the cabinet now. It is a full cavity. Maybe I'll put that on the Jess and Ducko Instagram story. That is a complete marble bench top and marble sink. He has pushed it through. Who did you say built that again?

Pinocchio. Who was? I think it was Meredichy. That's a cheap build for his mistress. Or it just has not last the test of time. To be fair, like a lot of stuff in Italy, it's 2,000 years old. I mean, that sing didn't, didn't contemplate the strength of one Australian bloke coming in needing to wash his, his undies. Really go for it. So I, I'm panicking. Oh, there's water everywhere. The basin was obviously full. Yeah. The waters everywhere. I'm like, we've broken seemingly an

artifact. Like, as I said, this building has history. This is going to cost us a fortune. It looks like it'll be expensive. Absolutely. So I go out. Thankfully, the, the receptionist is there and in my broken Italian I'm trying to say. I'm like bonjournal. Sink roto. I know broken in Italian but I didn't know sink and I was like we roto the sink and she's like what? I said I'm so sorry we've broken the sink the sink has fallen through

her first question were you trying to wash something has this happened before? I don't know she goes no no no it's so old it's so delicate you can't be doing that you pretty much can brush your teeth and that's it. I did not know She's like, did that Australian man take out anger and frustration on sink? How heavy were his undies? What was going on?

But I did not know you could break a sink. Yeah. I didn't know you could push a sink through itself. Yeah. Through the bench shop. He broke the unbrokable in my eyes, Chuck. So did they charge you for it? No, so she was very gruff.

Like, all the Italians on our journey had been very pleasant. We obviously got the baby. They were very family-focused. They loved children. So everyone had been really accommodating and nice. She was the gruffis I'd seen. Thankfully, she did not charge us. They didn't charge us, but they did say,

when are you getting out of the room? Because we've got to call a plumber. But it was a Sunday. And no one works in Italy on a Sunday. It's the Lord's Day. So we were brushing our teeth in the shower, which is fine. Yeah, yeah. But no, so we had to vacate the room and the plumber game on the day.

But did you pay for it? No, no. Oh, that's nice. Oh, granted. They already had our card on file. I'll check that. It's probably coming out. I don't look at the adornment.

been stuff, so I'll double check with Angus. But 13, 1060, I wanted to ask. You didn't know you could break it. Yeah. And yet you broke it. Yeah, what'd you break? What'd you break? You broke the unbrokeable?

Could have been on a holiday. Brokable? Unbreakable. A man's house. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Didn't know you could break. Did you break the unbreakable?

I didn't know you could bust a sink through the bench top just by trying to wash the undies. Wow. In the Motherland, things are obviously made cheap, you know? They're all. This was a marble sink in a marble bench top in our beautiful Palazzo. In my daughter's city. In your daughter's namesake city, Ferenze, Florence.

Ferenze. We're in this beautiful hotel. And my husband, oh God, love him for saying I could put his name to this because he's a proud man. He is. But he also doesn't break things. He's a fixer. But he must have had some bad, he's hiding some bad stains in his clothes to get rid of those. All right we said, he's just frustrated with the holiday that he had.

I had washed my undies, no issue. No issue. Oh, I might have a quick one too. Get some bonds back in rotation. Save us going to a laundromat. Save us going to a laundromat. Do you hear him just like... He's trying to tell me...

I really want to question his technique. He's trying to tell me he was like pushing down. Like needing dough? Like needing dough. I get it. We'd just made pasta. We'd done the truffle hunting course. There was pasta making involved.

Maybe he got confused. Yeah. But he has busted the sink literally through the bench. It has fallen through. I think a pipe snapped. There was water everywhere. That could have been. the water that was just in the sink. In a sink pouring everywhere. It's obviously happened to them

before. We had to walk with our tail between our legs. What I did to reception in my broken Italian try to explain, we busted the sink through the bench. That's very nice and not to charge you though. Oh no. Because that's probably a relic. Like I actually, we left the hotel one time and there was a tour group out the front of it because it is a bit of a landmark. People explaining, oh, this was the mistress. I hope you left a review. Don't use it. The sink sucks. Don't wash your things in the sink at least. Beautiful location, though. I've popped the video on the Jess and Ducker Instagram story

if you would like to see. I think I'm going to start calling him the Hulk. He's clearly very strong. Oh, okay. But Mark, good morning to you. Morning, guys. How are you? Good, Mark.

Did you break something you didn't think you could break? Yeah, a marble toilet seat in a hotel room. Oh, no. Okay. Where were you, Mark? We're in Queensland for a family holiday. Why was it a marble toilet seat? That feels very fancy.

I was expecting you to say Europe or something. No, I was only in Queensland. So how did it happen? Something fell off the wall, so I decided just to stand on it and then, yeah, foot straight through the bowl into the toilet. Oh, so you're perched on the toilet to try and fix what's fallen and, in fact, has made the situation worse. Yep.

I was thinking maybe you'd sliddle off its hinges, but you've gone right through it. Like he was busting and he just... snapped right down the middle. How was that phone called to housekeeping? Yeah. We sort of replaced it without them knowing. How do you... Did you go to Bunnings and get what looked like a cheap fake marble tour and put it on?

Yes. That's so good. Genius. And you never heard from them? That never heard from. Oh my God. That is genius. Because in Australia, I feel like I've got away with it because, you know, I don't know, the economy,

it's very touristy. In Queensland, I feel like, no, you're just an Aussie who broke our thing. You stepped on the tour. You're paying for that. What a genius you are, Mark. Thank you. We go to Sam on 13, 1060. You broke something in the Airbnb, Sam.

I certainly did. It was my Hens weekend away, and I broke a key in a lock. I'm going to start calling you the Hulk, too. How hard and viciously were you turning the key? You've snapped it off. Look, to be fair, the key was as old as Moses. It was one of those antique keys. Oh, okay.

Really real peculiar shapes? Yes, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So you're fiddling around. So what happened? You're on the outside of this point, so you couldn't get back in, obviously. Well, no, we were told that there was two fridges in the property.

So we went on the hunt for a second fridge, and it turns out it was locked away in, like, their own personal kind of book quarter. Okay. You're like, I paid for an Airbnb with two fridges. I'm finding that damn second fridge. Where's the other fridge? You lied to me. So do you have to pay for locksmith to come out? No.

Thankfully, they were really understanding, and they accepted that it was an old key. Okay. So you're similar in Florence. They know they're crap sold. And Tammy, let's wrap up. You broke something. You didn't realize you could break. Yeah, a whole kitchen bench.

How does that happen? They're sturdy. Well, they're meant to be. Well, we're up to. Very sturdy. So my husband was renovating. And you know, like, the part where your microwave goes into, like it's in its own little box.

Yeah, it's own little cavity. Yeah, so that hadn't been installed yet, but I didn't realize. And I went to do the old jump up. backwards through it and went straight through it. Oh, my God. So you're just now, I picture like, you know, when you don't realize the toilet seat's up,

so you sit down and then you just fall in and you're like collapsing on yourself. That's the one picture, Tammy, like a home. Just falling right through the cavity. Oh, I bet your husband would have loved you after. Yeah, I was going to say, how much was that to fix? I think like another thousand bucks because it was the main piece of the bench.

Oh, and you're already probably way over budget because Reno actually stays true to budget, and your wife's just put her ass through the kitchen bed. I'm bald. I absolutely bawled my eyes out, and he's just like, oh, well. Yes, and Docco. Hey, we've got a slight issue at J.D.H.Q. Talk to me.

You and I have a, we have a meeting after the show today with our boss and then our boss's boss. That's right. We've got a big meeting. I thought I wore some nice stuff to this meeting. And then look at how I went to the bathroom just before to take my jumper off because I'm getting a bit hot. Yeah. And I didn't realize that on my,

shoulder, I have a bunch of vomit from my child. I thought you're about to say, you just went to the bathroom and didn't shake hard enough. So now it looks like pissy pants. There's always dribble, but no, no, no, no, no, questions me. Oh, no, put the jumper back on. You've got vomit t-shirt. I've got vomit all over my t-shirt. I didn't know it was there.

And it's so funny. I thought this was clean. Because I think you have done an excellent job of not making dad your whole personality. You know, you're still the duck man. Yeah, thank you. This is very dad, though. I can't go to the meeting with our boss's boss and our boss with this vomit on my You know, you've got to put the jumper back on.

I know, but I'm so hot now. Hey, it's funny. I tried to wear a shirt. Like, I tried to wear a shirt. Are you look good? Yeah, you get your pills on. Take, I got my pills. You got my bird shirt.

Babs wore her nice boots. The team's firing to them. Yeah, you need to. I know, you know, I don't even know anymore. I don't want to, like, my clothes are covered in it. I don't want to get everyone offside. Like, oh my God, what a boastful B word. Didn't really deal with the baby vomit.

Oh. Once. Lutea is 20 70 months She's nearly two She's vomited once I know And you know what You're not gonna happen today

Projectile Yeah So I'll shut up now I'm gonna projectile on me the other day Yeah you've dealt with that a big Yeah a bit of bonbon Because usually I thought they fall into One of two categories

Spewers or Poohers She's both Yeah she does love her She does love a good turd My goodness Doesn't she just Anytime she gets frightened Or startled

Just goes We were gifted She takes up for her mum No sudden movements around either of your ladies and your dog. Oh my God, there's a trend. We do diaper changes in my family for everyone. Are you a burp cloth family? Yeah.

That raggedy thing you put on your shoulder. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What happened there? She went around it. Obviously, I didn't have it on. I didn't even know it was there. And black as well. I know as a black t-shirt.

I was trying to look sleek today. Instead, I'm just covered in vomit. You know what? Why don't you switch shirts with Babs? Yeah. Babs, can I have your shirt? And then I look like I'm homeless. Oh, Zing!

Come off it. No, I'm joking. I like your rusty shirt. I don't want it. It's not rusty. Oh, sorry. All right, Babes, I'll try it on. I'll try it on.

You need a clean shirt for the meeting. Yeah, is it? It's a knit. So you have a shirt on that? No. Mother, it's a knit. Well, bad is you're going to have to cop it, aren't you? Yeah, Mother, it's a knit.

Anyway, we'll sort it out. Shog, obviously, I would genuinely take his shirt. Yes and Docco. Oh, hey, my parents, you know they're on their caravan journey time in their life. That's right. Your dad retired. Your mom's sort of semi.

Retired. You're like, you know what? Let's see this great Red Land of ours. Yeah, they're going around. Because they only go to like nice caravan pass. Like they went to one inertia. Oh, and I imagine a powered side.

They ain't going off right. No, are you kidding? In their little caravan? No, sir. Oh my God. I love it. Is there, is they the bedroom in their caravan? Does it come from the ceiling?

No. It's all in the, it's like a sink of basin. That's the boo. where it's a proper bedroom. Everyone's old school, like 60s kind of ones. Sick. They went, like, they're experimenting now. They usually go with friends who are like campers

and stuff, but they went for the first time on their own and they sent us a photo. I love that the confidence is built. They're like, all right, we don't need the buffer. Yeah. We're doing it ourselves. Because you know, my dad, like, not handy. No. Where are you not get it from?

Exactly. So he's great in front of a microphone and a camera. Absolutely. But, you know, not able to pay. build anything or do what not. Or connect to the poo pump, I imagine. Oh, God, no. We get a text from Mum and Dad

into our family group chat and they pop it in there and they send a photo and they've got their caravan backed into a car park. And they're like, oh, staying here for the night. They've just parked up at a car park. So I went to a caravan park. They said that they booked. The caravan park realized that they'd overbooked and they had no space left. So mom and dad got relegated to the car park.

So just the asphalt car park. You guys can set up there. There's no power. They parked over like six car parks and they're having a shardinade. Oh, I love. They've put the awning out, got their deck chairs. They're like, cheers everyone having a shardanae. And we're like, are you guys in a car park?

Like, oh yeah, the caravan park was full till tomorrow. So we're just in the car park. There's like people walking across the street. Like, look here. And you know what? Kudos to your mama. I thought she'd be the kind of woman to be like, oh no. Yeah, me too.

You know what I mean? I'm kicking up a stink. Yeah. She sounds like she's rolling with the punches. A little bit. As long as she's well-fueled on Chardonnay, she'll be fired. Oh, they packed bottles of Chardonnay. But our whole family was like, you guys can't just be in a car park.

Surely not. And they back your trailer in there. And they said, well, the caravan park stuffed it up. So we're going in tomorrow. So tonight we just sleep in the car park. This is where we are. That's what they did. Is the caravan one of those, it's attached to their car?

Or is it its own self-driving? It's attached to the car. It's attached to the car. It's like a separate caravan. Gotcha, gotcha. Yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. I love this for them.

But it was full. They were full Captain Kim. Absolutely. Just rolling with it, guys? We're in the car park having a shot, I don't know. We'll make some friends with other car park dwellers. It's fine. There was no one else in that car park.

Jess and Ducco. It's about done here, team. What a show it's been, hey? What a show, if anything. This is like when I watch the footy. Oh, yeah? Particularly of those big games where the superstar has been knocked out, maybe they're injured, maybe their origin or whatever.

Yeah, yeah. But the team does just find. and they go, do we really need the superstar? Do we need that person? Oh, I see what you're saying. I was like, where are we going with this? Shark guys on here. Well, superstars are a generous term.

Do you know what I realise? The analogy makes it sound like he's our Nathan Cleary. Yeah, yeah, no. Oopsie. What I mean by that is, I'd be worried if I'm in. You could say a team when the coach, the coach is away because they're sick and they don't have a coach on the day of the game. I love that.

Coach is better. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's not our 5-8. Yeah, yeah. Nah. You and me are in the halves. We see Babs his fallback. We're the spine, baby.

Yeah, we're the spine. We're the spine. The cohesion. Between the two of us. You're right, coach is much better. I would be worried for him. He'd be like, ah, they didn't fumble without me. Have you heard from him, Babs, have we got the...

As the removal is done, actually? I don't think so. He keeps sending me updates, even though I'm not replying. And you don't care. The boy, the boy lives alone. Looks like bare minimal stuff from the few glimpses he's given us. A couple boxes and tissues and some toys. How much stuff did he have to move?

Yeah, and I can't be much. And his robo back, he threw it out because he got over it. Oh, that's right. She kept bumping into the walls, scuffing them up in the rental. Malfunctioning. We can't be having that. Absolutely not. But I'd be worried if I was him.

Yeah. You know? Be warned, Shy Lord. Don't take another day in lieu. I'll tell you. Did we know if Babs, did he take today as leave? Do you know? Do you put it in?

No idea. That's a no. You know how we get this company very kindly gives us a birthday leave? You're meant to take it around your birthday so you can celebrate with friends and family, but you really can do it. Yeah. Maybe he counted this as his birthday leave. That's true. He probably could have done that.

Maybe. But it better be in the system, is what I'm saying. He's not getting a free pass. Oh, no way. He'll be back on deck tomorrow, but we'll see. We might not need him. Well, because Wednesday's shot guy dips. Oh, good.

Dips is back. Dips is back. Oh, my God, there's been three. What do you do? Serial. What do you do? It's been three weeks. He's been whinging that the cereal aisle has big, yeah,

in front of his very eyes as we make our way down it. Do we have enough to see out the year? I think so. I think we can. Oh, I think he started shopping at Aldi, he just didn't want to go to Aldi. That's right. Oh, remember he had like a spate of American ones.

Yeah. Lucky Charms, Reises, pieces, tricks. Yeah, yeah. So let's see if he's gone shopping tomorrow and where he's gone shopping. Yeah, that'll be back tomorrow. You can win a Gizbit, a fridge magnet, plus some good times. Oh, my God, I've not heard the word Gisbit in three weeks. And how I've missed it.

It's good to have them back. It is. More chances at Alpha Bucks tomorrow. More chances at Ed Shearing tickets for that call of fame. That's right. That's right. Get involved in the show. Now, did we come to a...

We went to have a wordioki. We didn't do it because I go guys away and stuff. You mean, Year of the Song. Sorry, Year of the Song. But I had a fair few people message to me saying, don't can year of the song. They want to keep it. They'd rather canned wordioki.

Now, I did say we'd put a poll on Instagram. The day got away from me. I did not. I will do it today. We will get a temperature check. Because I know, are you now bending to the pressure a bit? Well, I'm thinking Year of the Song I'd have to stay. Yotis.

We're going to put a poll. Justin Tucker on Instagram. You vote. We are going to can. one of our segments and you get to decide which. We might refresh the new one. We might bring another one. And please don't reply being like,

you'd get rid of both of them. It annoys me. It's like when we put our bangers selections, oh, these all suck. Can you just vote? Just say nothing. Just enjoy. People can't say nothing.

They cannot not say nothing. They'll want to cancel both segments. That's right. But we're out of here. Back tomorrow. If you missed any of you grab the podcast, well done today, Babs. Great job.

Excellent work from you. Thank you. Yep. New bits look good too. I know. She slays She's so funny in her own right She's going to get to know it

Just give her time to warm up Just give her time We're out of here We'll see you bye Bye bye Bye bye Cato curry What's that

Katoo curry What's that Chicken Katoo curry Oh so like chicken Chicken chicken Ducon Ducco That was the Jensen Ducco podcast The rumors are true

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