Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | I'm a sicko

Episode Date: October 2, 2025

Can a witches blessing lift Duckos Broncos Grand Final curse? Jess asked what did you go out for and come back with and Shy Guy does spon con!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Monopoly at Maccas is back. Play only in the app. Ends October 14. For full terms, visit McDonald's.com.com. This is the Jess and Douggo. Welcome to the podcast, boo-boo! Here we go. Yeah, here we go.

What a show. Biggie. Biggie. Would you say sometimes they're Little East? Today felt like a biggie. Yeah, I'd say. Maybe because we have so many learnings. Yeah, we do.

We learn all. Today we learn a lot about a lot. Camels. There was a bit of camel learning. Did you know what a dromedary was? It feels familiar. I reckon that word came up once in primary school, but I didn't code it away.

Like it didn't feel important. And now all these years later, dromedary has been brought up. Dramadery. Dramadery. Yeah, I didn't know what that was. Didn't she feel like? Didn't it feel like she thought we were stupid?

She did. She definitely did. What was the camel lady's name? Sonia? She had a lot of judgment for us. She was talking about camels like everybody knows. That's, I think, my 100%. You've come to this show to tell us.

you went to a horse show to watch, ended up leaving with a camel you purchased. Not everyone's had that experience, babe. Pardon me for not knowing a lot about camels. I know. And the two hump, three hump thing, one hump in Australia. So can you ride a camel with one hump?

Get her back up. I guess you can put a saddle on it. Get her back up. Shag I Google it. Well, do you put saddles on camels? Or do you, I thought. Yeah, you do. You sit in between the humps.

Yeah. I thought you sat in between the hums and you hold onto the hump like you would a saddle. Yeah, that's what I thought. But I guess is that hard on your own. groinel area Are you just straddling a hump You know? Are you on the peak of the hump?

Yeah, what do you do there? You are asking to slide off. Yeah, well, that just seems problematic. It seems problematic. I don't know if I could get enough purchase. I feel like when I rode one, I had a saddle underneath me. On your, on a big area. They do do saddles.

Yeah. And you could sit between the two humps on a two hump. You're going to slide off the back, doesn't it? Yeah, that looks uncomfortable. It does. See, look at the double humper. Yeah. The double humper looks way better.

Yeah. Horses are comfy. When's the last time you rode a horse? When's the last time I wrote a horse? Not a cowboy, horse. Yeah, yeah. I can't remember the last time I rode a horse. Neither can I.

I reckon I was like five. A while ago. Five, that feels young. Probably in like primary school, I reckon. It's one of those things, though, I still feel very confident. If you're like, I go ride this horse, like, no. I could do it. Yeah, I can sit in truck.

Oh, you know where I last rode a horse. Do you remember? I reckon it was sometime in COVID. It was just before we all got locked down. Angus and I were doing like this very bogey bush stay and there was horse riding as one of the activities. Yep. And we happened to meet a couple of pharmacists who lived literally around the corner from us. There's horse riding and then there's like horse riding where someone pulls you and you're going really slowly.

I like to go a bit like a little trot. But then I've got to say, because again, I'm not particularly well versed with the horse. Mine went a little bit rogue and I got the panic. It couldn't have been slower. It couldn't have been slower, but he just went off the beaten path into the bush. He veered and I'm like, I can't. control this beast. Well, it's like when I did the weather for the today show with the Clydesdale horses.

Yes. And then she was like, I can tell you. Are they the littlies? No, they're the big Scottish horses. They're the massive ones with a thick hair. Like big John? Yeah, yeah, exactly like that. They built Australia.

Pardon me, I thought Clydesdales were little. No, Clydesdales are huge. Clisdell's a huge. They're the big, they're the big, they're the big, they're the big, they're the big, they're the big, they're all about them. And what did the woman say to you? Because the way I was, my nature with it and when I was doing how I treated it, she's like, you've been around horses.

I did you grow up on property you grow with horses I'm like yeah you know horses and yabbies I know how to speak horse I feel like if you can if a horse likes you it's a good judge of character it's like if a dog at the party chooses to sit with you and get a pat similar with a horse 100% yeah yes have you ever ridden horses babes you grew up in the country yes but we didn't have horses but actually had a a horse person came came to my fifth birthday I think and like all the kids just like went around a little shetland pony yeah I was like to be into horses I I can see you being into horses. So for Lucia's second birthday, we're going to, like, the wildlife thingy.

And I'm going, we need an activity. We need an activation. Yeah. Maybe we get someone if you're riding a little horsey. Are we seeing, like, what is that, the wildlife thing? So mainly it'll be a barbecue and you get to have. It's like in an area or are we going into the... We've got an area.

I've got an area book. Is there lizards and stuff? Well, you can book your pay extra for one of the keepers to walk around. Oh, do that. Maybe. Pay for it. You got nothing expensive coming up. Yes.

So the real highlight will be the barbecue And we're going to have a tasting Of the Lucia Rosei Oh, I can't wait for that Yes, it's now settled It's now settled in the sediment and all that Me too Morgan and I'm talking about for Flo

We're like, we're going to throw a first birthday for Flo? Nah What? What? We're just going to pretend We're just going to pretend And just like, sweetie, you look so good on your first birthday By May

Sorry, by April My, famous last words I should be back in my house We'll christen it with Flo's birthday I'm happy to host. Yeah, okay. Get some soft play. What theme should we do?

Oh, goodness me. Flo, do we do an underwater theme? Yeah, it's going to say water. Flo. Flo. Floorrence, yep. Or do you want to do an Italian theme like Florence? Last night we were out to dinner at this pub and she was sitting there.

She was like all chilled and Morgan got pizza and she was like, oh, I just starts like hitting the table. She's ready to start solid. She wants some bad. Did she have a little taste of pepperoni? No, she hasn't eaten anything yet. We haven't started to salt. And I wouldn't start with pepperoni. I think you knew that.

Morgan was reading this whole book on baby food, what to give him. She got the boob to food Bible. Something like that. And I was like, I'm just going to ask chat GPT. And they were saying the same things. Okay. And she, yeah, anyway, she's, don't do that. She's very much like, we're going to give it a nice diet and well-rounded.

And nothing, nothing fucking pure, like, sorry, nothing from woolies or coals. That's like baby processed stuff. Yeah. The, um, how do you reckon you'll go? Because you have to do the allergens. How do you feel about maybe introducing those? things. I'm excited. I just hope she doesn't have any allergies. You hope so. Imagine

we find out she can't have egg. Oh my God. So who did I catch up with a friend of ours? Her little one. Egg. Egg. Egg. Cows Milk. And there was another biggie. Oh, something that's so annoying. And I'm like, oh my God. It would be really annoying. And I'm like,

how do you find that out? Because obviously at that age, they can't tell you, oh, sore throat, this and that she goes, it's hives and they break out. Oh, you're going to go to hospital. Stuff that noise. Because obviously then makes anything like someone else looking after them, daycare. Yeah. Oh my God, just so much more frantic.

So, yes, I hope it's a smooth food journey for you. We've been really lucky with Lucia. I know. She started throwing up bananas recently and I'm sort of like not mad about it. Oh, no. I love you to be intolerant to bananas. I don't want them in the house. Not another nana.

No more narnie. Right. But yes, she's so ready, isn't she? That's what my auntie did actually the other day. We were like, oh, we haven't given her souls. We're going to start. She goes, oh, we were eating chicken, like the bachelor's handbag, chicken from Woolies. And she goes, oh, do you want to start with raw chicken bones?

Here you go. Like, I've got a raw chicken bone. The bone. Sorry, cooked chicken bone. It was the bone of like a chicken. And she's like, here you go. And we're like, oh, no, she's not eating anything. She goes, oh, these are good.

And we're like. Isn't that funny? There is a, there is a camp for that. Yeah. And she was very like. Sucking on bone marrow. So she said. Just sucking on the chicken bone.

But I was like, surely that's problematic. You know what? And this is the issue with asking maybe the internet. You could find anything to support anything. Oh, God. Something like that. can she choke on it? Exactly.

I wouldn't give it to her without, like she would put, it's thin and long. Ah, see, okay, no, so what I, I would have said, no, she can't. But yes, of course, if she shoves it in. And she would, too. But we would give Lucia full lamb chops and my mom would freak out, being like, what are you doing? I said, well, she doesn't have teeth. She can't break this off.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's essentially just sucking the juices in, which is all that protein and iron. And it's probably too long for her to all they put in. Yes. So, but yeah, the bone, fair. That's fair. And if it had any chicken bits, that's then a choking hazard. Yeah.

because she can't chew it. But it's, oh my God, I've heard people, they choke on croissant, they choke on a, they choke on a squished blueberry. You've just got to be so vigilant. Oh, God. And do your back blows. God. Yeah, the back blows.

The back blows. It is funny, though, how anxious you start. And then I'm like, try this. Try this. Chuck into it, catches gravy your mouth. I gave her chickpeas, hard, raw chickpeas the other day. I went, I don't know if this is appropriate. And then I found out my mother-in-law's been giving her popcorn for six months.

I'm like, well, she's fine. What our parents would have done to us. Like, it's just classic. Exactly. The more information we have. I'm like, all my mum did was by process. I know. That's what was told.

It's iron infused. You give them that. Okay. The more information we have, if anything, the worse it makes it. Yeah, and that's exactly going back. You can find anything to support what you want to do. So it used to say what's right, what's wrong, and safe. Yeah.

In other news, Taylor Swift's album drops today. Oh, my God. Babs. Tomorrow. Oh, tomorrow. Oh, tomorrow. Oh, but that's why we're playing a song in the show. I'm with you.

I'm with you. I thought you said, I think you said 2pm today, but we're playing a song tomorrow. I was like, well, that's not that exciting. Yeah, nah, drop tomorrow afternoon. It's multiple emails about this shit. What's the one we will play? Well, you know, it's R&B Fridays. The crack marketing team here at hit have called it R&B Fridays.

Don't accuse them of being on crack. You're getting trouble. That's someone's job. Absolutely. And the other option was Tay Slay's R&B Fridays. That's a lot of rhyme. She feels like a rap Anyway, which song are we going to play?

I don't know yet. Oh, you don't know. Don't know yet. I hope it's one with the savvy cap. So there'll be, um, Taylor's taking over from Hey, it's Taylor. New album at two. Oh my God.

But we get one of them to play. We get one of them to play. That's cool. That's six and. Maybe that one. Yeah. Yeah. Do you know anything about how artists choose, which will be a single in which.

I'm pretty sure it's just like the song they like the best. Legit. Yeah. Orfella. Ophelia. Ophelia. Ophelia. That.

Oh. Oh. we'll be playing. Sorry, that's the song name. That's the single off the album. I'm excited. I'm excited to hear it. So Taylor says this will be the one I want Jess and Duck to play and sends that out.

I'd assume so. Should we take a bet on what one will be the hit? I can give you the track list. Yeah, give us the name. Okay, this is fun. Track two, Elizabeth Taylor. No. Track three.

I can't say that. And Babes, you might have to do this. Can't read again. It's that reading thing. I can't read, man. Opolite? Yep. Father figure.

That feels like a hit. Yeah, but look at that. Look what it says there. It says feet, George Michael. It doesn't say feet. It says written by. Well, that means she's going to use a sample of the song Father figure. Oh, okay.

Okay. Should it say featuring? Well, if you're sampling, do you have to put that in your song title? Well, maybe you're not sampling, but maybe she's using the lyrics from that song. I don't know. So you've got to give credit somewhere. That song's in Nam, that Nicole Kidman song. A baby girl.

Yeah. Elder's daughter, ruin the friendship. actually romantic sounds like a banger Wish list Wood Like wood not wood I coulda shoulder But wood like tree wood

Could that be about nature? Canceled Oh Canceled Because you know why You can tell this gonna hit But what you made me do vibe You know what I mean

It's got an exclamation point In the track title That's a fuck you Kanye That is Honey And then And then Track 12 of the album

Feetcher Sabrina, the life of a showgirl. That could also go on. Title, what is they say? Titular. Titular song. Titular. The titular song on the album.

I can't imagine Taylor injecting yourself. Can I go into, I know Shagai, you said there's many notes. This is how detailed this email Shagai's received. Notes. The song Wish List is stylized as Wish, where the S is a dollar sign and the the S of Wish and the S of List will be dollar signs. Right. Cancelled will be stylised in our systems.

All caps. This is the level of detail in this email. My goodness. Is that you a bit embargoed? Yeah, I was just thinking that. Oh, yeah. No, fuck it. No, it doesn't.

That should be in red and I see no red. No, I agree. Yeah. There you go, guys. Well, tune in tomorrow for that. That's going to be exciting. Oh, Jay's chipped in on the email. Our boss.

Yeah. Track listing below, if you want to reflect. Do we want to reflect? We will be reflected. I think he meant when we played the song tomorrow, but. But we'll reflect a day early. It's fine. Why not?

There you go. Song 1 tomorrow in the show will be Taylor Swift first play. Well, then we're going to have to... That's not going to work then to have... We might have to just do a reflection on song 1, so we have to move. We're going to have to move... No Dunfield Friday to 640. B-105 have to drop Genuine's pony to play Taylor Swift's song.

Shit. Fuck. That is the level of detail in this email. But what's Fox going to do? That's a great question. What's S-A-FM going to do? They've only... S-A-FM getting briefed in the...

morning. They're not even getting brief now. What do you want to do programming, hey? Like, like, that shit is just, like, emails about that. It's just ridiculous. That is so funny. Hamish, you are so detailed. I love it. I love it. Cancel. I reckon, yeah, we'll play cancel. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, well, guys. We'll play the single.

Yeah, yeah, we're playing a single. But we don't know what the single is. The first one. And we just, yeah, no, it says, it says single. Fade of Ophelia. My apologies. We'll play fate of failure. I've already lost the bed.

Yeah. Giddy up right on 6 o'clock. Okay, welcome to Thursday. Good morning. Good morning to you. I love that it looks like it's the middle of the day. It's the best. It doesn't make your mood better? It is broad daylight.

Enjoy it because this time next week, this will be what? This will be, uh, God, not this again. Seven, this will be seven. Yes, this is the equivalent of seven. So when we are coming to work, it'll be dark. It will be dark again. This fortnight, I think it's my favorite time of year. I love.

Putty. The sun is shining. Spring has sprung. Oh, mate. The flowers, the buds in the trees. Yeah, the buds. I'm getting very excited about the buds. You do love buds.

I'm very lucky. I don't suffer from hay fever too bad. It's been a tough season for me. But even you as a hayfeeves sufferer, a sinus sleuth. This is my first spring with hay fever because, I remember I got my sinus surgery last August. Of course. So I was sort of recovering, so I didn't count in September. Yes.

And up until that. that point, what had spring been for? Because you were so stuffed up in the sinuses. I just didn't really... You weren't being affected by it. I was like, look at those spring losers. Yes, whereas now all your pipes are clear, you're cop on the pollen. Yeah, it's the worst.

It's not one thing, it's another. Oh, no. You fix something, something else happens, you know? Absolutely. It's been a tough spring for the old pollen police. What do we call ourselves, Babs? The old pollen party. Come with me on this journey.

Sure, yep, pollen party. The pollen party. I'm upset I wasn't invited to that party, shy guy. No, you guys had your own party. You had your sandwich. We did have our sandwich role play party. You did theatre sports at, yeah, at a sandwich shop. Mate, you should say I've got a swag of costumes for our next date.

Can't wait. I'm excited. No. A lot of wigs. A lot of wigs. We need to bro date, Shai Lord. I'm open. Hey, Bab, do you want to go get a pedicure?

I'm actually going to get one today. Oh, my God. Do you want to come? Who are you going? Is that a solo thing? I usually go by myself. Yeah, remember last time? Oh, yeah, you're good, baby.

Yeah, the same place. I'm going to see the crying lady again. Yes, I like that place you go. Maybe I'll pop in. Hey, this could be fun. You guys, okay, you guys go play theatre sports. Yeah. And we'll go get petis.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, Shugga, we can play golf. Do we have to do sports? No, we'll play golf. No, no. I'll do that. You only act. That's easy.

Wow. Take him to the driving range. Yeah, take him to the driving range. Yeah, take him to the driving race. I got a drive-range, hit a few balls to talk. He could use him as the golf club. Yeah. So long and thin.

Sure. Have a few beers, you know, hit a few balls. He'll have a pair of cider, thanks. Yeah, obviously. Do you know him? Apple cider. Apple cider. Apple cider. He's a huge apple cider guy.

Anyway, it is a bit too crazy. A bit too loopy. It is a good time of year, though. It is. It's beautiful. So we hope you're embracing it, enjoying it. Wherever you're at, you know. Whatever you're doing.

Yeah. Anything else going on anyone's world before we get really underway with the show? Anything else? I had a horrific dream last time, which I won't get into about me and Shagai. You know, I know it's a cliche thing, particularly in radio. It's hack content, wouldn't you say, Shagga, people talking about dreams. You very kindly shared it off there. You guys were all disgustle.

Oh, my God. That is something I would like to dissect a bit more, but I think we need a freaking therapy. Maybe in the podcast. It was traumatizing. Like, I woke up and I was like almost in tears shaking. And it's upsetting because it's not like you would just watch something horrific. No. And I know you.

It's not like you would have had a cheeseboard just before bed. No. Which can give you funky drink. The fact we don't... Yeah, yeah. Cheese. Cheese, yeah, cheese rest before bed. It's a thing.

The fact we don't... The fact we don't... The fact we don't know why this scenario crept its way into your brain. Well, actually, I do blame my dog in some ways. She did something that kept me up all the lot, which I'll speak to about the show. Oh, so that is on air.

I have not had much sleep last night. Jeez. I'm operating today. I reckon I'll have four hours sleep. Oh, and it's got nothing to do with you having a baby in the house. Nothing to do with my perfect daughter, who did not wake up. At all overnight. Cool, doly.

All right, well, we'll get into it. It's my dog. It's my firstborn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you have mentioned how she's a little starved for attention. She is feeling like, hey, I'm not queen of the castle anymore. Yeah. Now that young Florence came out.

Put it this way. I was outside at 1.30 in the morning. So, you know, maybe that's why the troopers were pretty whack after that. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll get into it in the shirt today. We'll unpack it. There is a lot to get to. There is.

We still got Alparks who a chance at 10K. What else we got year of the song today? No, one second song game. That's right. I'm running it. I have a great theme for you guys. Can you tell us now? No, because I think it might give it away too much.

See how annoying it is? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll start thinking. Yeah, I'll tell you a bit later on, but I feel like this isn't going to favour Babs, this theme. Good. I feel like this is going to favour no one in a sense. Like, this is even players.

Could be donuts across the board. Yeah, it could be a really bad game. This could be my time to shine. We have more tickets to Teddy Swims as well for a cool of fame. You get involved in the show any chance you can. Yeah. Up next, though. Babs, what are you got for us?

She said, I've got a headline, I've got a story, I want to lead it. Do I have to? Yeah. What is it? Give us a tease. Experts reveal sex problem that's causing issues for Gen Z relationships. All right. I love it.

I'll just read the article next. Put this one off for you guys, Gen Z. Jess and Ducko. Hey, what are you got for us, Babs? Oh, you know, some breaking news. Experts are revealing there's a massive sex problem with Gen Z at the moment. Would you agree? I guess, sure.

This is the only reason I wanted you to see this story. I know you did, and I don't know what you expect. What's the point of us bringing this information when we are not in the generation? I'm having plenty of sex. Are you, Jess? Plenty. Shire Guy, I am ready. I know your right hands are getting to work out, Shagai.

Sorry, over to you, Babs. Don't you misgender his hands? I've already had enough. Are you done? I'll be done here. You want me to punch you out? Our boss loves it tight and bright. Tightest and the brightest. Apparently, a staggering 49% of...

Wait. It's hard to read articles, isn't it? Yeah, it is. That's why you should have taken in the info. Oh, they're having less sex by a staggering 49%. So it's down 49%. My bad, sorry. Because...

Yeah, sorry, you go. Gen Z are living with housemates or parents. That's just my next question to you. Do you live with housemates? Would you say it's harder? Because I've lived with housemates and trust me in a boy's house. It doesn't seem to bother anyone that much. I mean, I don't really think about it that much,

but I can see where it would be a problem for people. Did you find, though, in your all-boy house, bringing a lady, obviously heterosexual, bringing a lady, you had to sort of be like, don't look at the mess, don't worry about that, don't talk to them and just rush to your room? Like, it's not exactly the most romantic, inducing scenario. I think if they're coming back to that place,

they know what's up. They don't, yeah. If they're coming back to the den, they don't care. To the land. Yeah, yeah, there was no warning. That's, yeah, yeah. Yes, okay. There was water leaking from the light, the lights in the roof.

It was a rat in my mate's room. They know what they've signed up for. There's cockroaches in the kitchen. Welcome. Ready to take your clothes off, honey. So the housemate scenario is now causing issues for Gen Z. Whereas us millennials, we were happy to look beyond it. Didn't mind as much.

Yeah, people are saying it even feels awkward just to cuddle or hold hands in the house when their housemates or parents are home. Really? Yeah. Would you and Jethra hold hands in front of either parents? We didn't really hold hands. Okay, what did I say that? Would you kiss ever in front of either parents? Um, oh.

I don't really think we have. Yeah. Because, you know, it does kind of feel a bit weird. I'm like, oh, sorry. One of the greatest points of contention with my relationship with my parents is, for some reason, my mum was driving ahead of us in her car. my boyfriend and I at the time were in the back seat of my dad's car in the car behind. And we thought we were so sly, smooching in the back seat.

Even though my dad is right there, we were smooching getting away with it, we thought. Yeah, yeah. Not realizing my mum in the vehicle in front was watching us in her ringing mirror. Obviously the tint not very strong she could see all the way through. Absolutely blew up at me once we did arrive home. How disrespectful kissing your boyfriend in your father's car. He could have turned around. I had to witness that filth, yada, yada.

So I get it from Gen C's perspective. Yeah, you don't want to do it. Let's not do it in front of parents. They're going to make it weird. See, when I first started a day, Morgan, I'd be like, let's go right in front of your dad and just tongue punch. You did not. Yeah, I was like, hey, Ward, watch this. And Ward are going, let me give you some tips.

Because he's a dentist, you see. He knows tongues. He knows. What's that tongue angle? That's going to be a rude canal in three to five. Your acidic saliva. Yes and daco. know you've been as concerned as I have, not hearing from Rob and Lisa Fartreone for a few days.

Well, we tried to touch base with them after my dad set the fire alarm off in Lyon. Yeah, they went underground after they basically had sex after trying to set a fire alarm off. I don't even know if they got to the hanky-panky ducco because the candle, which then set off the fire alarm in the hotel, was for the mood setting, for the ambiance. So I doubt they were able to get it done in amongst the evacuation. Now, I tried to touch base, get more information from them. And the only response I got was, can't talk, we're in prison. Yeah.

And we heard that French news. We played that French radio station on this show. It made the local news, which you were able to tap into. Part of me was like, they're not responding. Are they actually in trouble? Like, have they... The joke's gone on long enough. The joke's gone on long enough.

And then I start getting AI images from my dad giving himself a teeth whitening job and putting blonde hair on him. I'm like, oh, he's discovered chatting. and how to edit his picture. So he's obviously out of prison. I think it's hilarious. My mum text me at about 8.30 last night. Hey, can we FaceTime?

And I'm literally getting into bed. And I went... So they're still in France? They're still there. This holiday just keeps going. How long have they been there for? Are you guys home, yeah? Yeah.

There goes your inheritance, honestly. I was really hoping for a really good Christmas present to help pay off some of these tiles we've picked. But there goes that. To help us your Christmas present? Money? To help pay off the Christmas present? These tiles.

Not money. I'm going to send them the tile I want to say, hey, pay for this tile. You can pay for the house we live in, the brick by brick. See, that's smarter. Yeah, yeah. If your family wants to do all cash or a gift, tell them the gift, because more often than not, you can get a bit, get more out of it. Yeah, yeah.

So my mum's saying, can we FaceTime at 830? I'm like, oh, Jesus, they've got to update me on something, something's going on. But all they wanted to say was, it's our last day. We wanted to touch space. She's in her beret, in a red beret. So she was in a different sort of hat, which was a tad to skew on her head. And I'm like, is it windy? Is she smoking a long, thin cigarette?

Absolutely. So they're in Nice. I've been to Nice. They spent the day in Monaco. Yeah, beautiful. They just talk about, see you later in marriage. The only bad thing about Nice is the rocky beaches. That's where they were.

They weren't on the beach. It wasn't beach weather. They were just having a cruise along the promenade and thought, let's face time. Jessica. Just make her jealous. But I said, you know, how's it been? It's gone on for freaking long enough this trip. Yeah.

And they did say, look, we're ready to come home. You know, my mum then went straight on to having six croissants a day, you know, I'm starting to feel it. My mum's a relatively clean eater. Yeah, right. She's the kind of person who has ten almonds as a snack. Not nine, not eleven. She'll pick out ten. Not nine, not eleven, ten.

I'm not going to niche myself. No, that's bang on. Okay, you pay that? It's Harry Potter. I knew it was Harry Potter. Well done, Ducko. That's not niche at all. That's the perfect reference.

Done it again. But I said, oh what, you can't get almonds in France? Like, could you have not have kept up your 10 almond snack in France? She goes, no. And you know what else? That I make good bananas here. Oh, jeez. They don't.

Can you confer? I don't think they do. She's filthy. And as a banana lover myself. She's a banana lover too. No one does bananas like Australia. Between you and my mum's love of wee spas and now bananas. And she's fit and she's clean.

You've got the same pellets, seriously. But she's filthy. She goes, that's why I'm ready to come home. I haven't had a good banana in six weeks. Well, there goes the whole purity of the trip, the joy. You do get sick of the European breakfast, right? Like when you're over there, you're like, I don't want cold meat and cheese. A continent.

Just give me wheat bits, your dogs. Well, that's what she has for breakfast. She has a banana. Yeah. I don't know if she has the almonds for breakfast, but that's all she's wanted. I went, wow, that's the takeaway. That's the final sour note of your six-week trip.

Don't worry about the evacuation and the prison stay. Did you press them about the evacuation again? No, they still, they are keeping tight-lipped. She's telling me they've signed an NDA with the hotel and local authorities. And they are sticking to this. They're sticking to it. They must be so embarrassed. But we can put a pin in their trip.

They're heading home today. They're back. And I hope my brother has. some great bananas waiting for my mom. He better. He better. And not Lady Finger. Lady Finger bananas suck.

Which one of the ladies? They're the little ones, a little chippilada-looking ones. Are they the ones with the little red condom on the tip? No, they're continental, I believe. I never get those either, the waxy. I just get the normal ones, but the lady fingers are little ones. Oh, and they look like a weird little hand. Yeah, they do.

They do. The devil's hand. All right, I hope my brother's listening. My mom just wants a nice. Yeah, big, long, normal banana. Relatively firm. Yeah. Yeah.

Goodbye, nah. 30 seconds and ducco in the morning. Jess and ducco's 10K Alphabucks on hit for the bugs. 30 seconds to answer 10 questions. We'll start with the same letter. I have to tell you first answer. Can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass.

We come back, of course, if there is time. Our player today is William. Hello, Will. Yeah, mate. I don't like a lot. Good morning, Will. We are fantastic, but I mean, we don't stand a chance to win $10,000 right now. That's you. Are you going to take it office? Oh, I'm hoping so.

Okay. That's all we can ask. What do you want to spend the money on? Oh, I needed myself a new car at the moment. Okay. A lot of people need new cars lately. That's been a very common thread. Yeah. Well, William, maybe with your $10,000, you'd like to put it towards a BMW. Maybe a Bentley Because the letter you're going to work with is B

Oh beautiful Very good You're ready to rock Let's go Let's go Come on Willie Your time will start after the first question Starting with the letter B

We need you to name A dog breed Pass A vegetable Broccoli A beauty brand Pass An occupation

Butler A periodic A band. Pass. A band in town? A non-alcoholic drink. Propal. A musical.

Pass. An adjective. Beautiful? An instrument. Base. Battler with one of the great answers. That's fantastic. You got one or two or three.

I'm not really sure. There's a lot of question marks on my sheet here. I love getting a big question mark on. Beautiful. Great, that's a tick. Yeah? But the rest? Yeah. But the rest question marks.

Dog breed could have been a vorticoly or a beagle. A vegetable could have been, oh, you've got broccoli. A beauty brand could have been, well, benefit cosmetics. Is there any others, any other big hitters? Burtz? Yeah, Bert's a lip-barm. A bobby brown does some nicer eyeliner. Yeah, that's a tough one for a will.

Occupation, though. Occupation. Battler. One of the greats. They were a battler or Butler? I think you said Battler. Do you say batler? No, I said butler.

Bartler. I gave it anyway. I was like, Batler. That is so funny. Oh, Butler. Bartler. Oh, well, that actually works then. Still good.

Still funny as well. I thought, oh, it was hilarious. A band, you said, buds in town? I didn't catch that. I think you made it up. Blinklin 82. Could have been one. I'm not an alcoholic drink.

I didn't hear what you said either. Brickvale. Say again? Brookvale. Brookvale. Aren't they alcoholic? They're an alcoholic brand of drink. The question was non-alcoholic drink, though.

Bubble tea or banana smoothie. A musical, Billy Elliott, an adjective. You said something. We were looking for brave or best or bold. An instrument could have been the bus guitar. Yeah, just ran out of time. We had fun, mate. You don't get a car, but you do get $100 of fuel, thanks to O'Brien.

We're staying in the car realm. For the battlers out there, Willie. For the battlers and the butlers. That's so good. Battler. I was like, hell yeah. That's something of that. He's just paying that occupation.

That's a lot harder a bit that looks, guys. Oh, he's really. Oh, fantastic. Thanks, Will. Have a good one, guys. You too. Up next, got more chances at that call of fame prize. You've got to get involved in the show.

Yep. Tickets to see Teddy Swims. We don't have to take McRae. Jess and Ducco. 13, 1060. I said what, what? Nope, sorry, wrong rat. 13, 1060.

What was in there? What was in there? That would have been so smooth. But now people are just going butt stuff? I know. Damn. What was in there? What was in there?

We're asking what was in there, because I think you can get what we're going. You don't need to repeat the dog. People know. People know. An ER doctor has gone viral for revealing the most outrageous objects he's ever removed from a patient's buttox. Dr Kenji Oyeesh, he is obviously gone viral on TikTok. He's a Doctor of the Strange, he calls himself. Yeah, that's fair.

Very good. That's fair. Did you say ER doctor? Yeah, yeah. The stuff they would see. Oh, yeah. So this is him explaining. a patient coming, one of the most cooked things he saw.

A guy came in whose complaint was personal problems, which I always know it was going to be usually butt stuff. He says that he and his girlfriend got a little crazy last night or maybe two days ago put something up there and he can't get it out. I said, you know what, no judgment. I get it. This was a Yankee candle.

And I'm not talking about just the little baby one. I'm talking about the desktop jar. And not just the top, but the whole damn thing. Now, pardon me, Kenji, what's a Yankee candle? That's a similarly sized one. Whoa! That's a thick boy. That's a girthy boy.

So I guess a Yankee candle, I've just looked up, is the brand. For us, Oz's, Glasshouse candle. Oh, Glasshouse candles. Get the thick ones. So thick, girth. You need length and girth in this league. Yes, you do. In the candle league, yes, you do.

But they don't intend the people, the good people at Glasshouse don't intend to stick it up. It says that, I've read that. on the bottom of it. It's like, don't put this up your butt. I was like, oh, okay, well, I don't find something else. He then goes... Morgan was out. Flo was asleep. He's gone, what can I play with? Don't bring my daughter into the story. Well, where is she? In this scenario.

She's not around yet. This was 10 years ago. She's not taking her out to dinner. She wants to get on the margarita. So his daddy watch, but she has to be asleep. She wasn't alive yet. She was a twinkle of my eye. Anyway, he then had to go. He had to talk about how he gets it out. Listen to this. So really the treatment is to paralyze them in the operating room with anesthesia like you would for an operation, although you don't operate on them. But it requires critical care, anesthesia, intubation, putting them on a ventilator. You give them a medication that relaxes every muscle in their body so you can go up and grab it. Go up and grab it.

They're just got to be loose, baby. Because something like a glass house candle or a Yankee candle, they are literally in the glass jar. So it's not like you can use a magnet or a hook. You know, nothing is going to. Maybe a vacuum. Gurney Not wouldn't that push it in Yeah, that would go

You don't want to go further You see that Yeah, yeah Sharkar's ring turns on again That's Kenji's ringtone Okay What else am I dealing with today? Now I know this is niche

And I don't expect it to be Stuff with the butt But 13 1060 You're asking what was in there Specifically there Now my mate I've told the story 20 times He had a cockroach in his ear

That was in there That was in there That was in there A filthy pig of a housemate He's a dirty boy I'll tell you what was in there A pulled pork burrito? Where was it?

My brother's car. So one of his friends playing funny buggers didn't finish his pulled pork burrito. I'm going to leave this under the front seat of the car, the passenger seat. My brother doesn't realize only until the stench. She's so bad. Because obviously in the sun, enough time goes past. That starts rotting. Pull pork as well.

Pulled pork with guck and sour cream. That's taken you off Guzman for life. Absolutely. That's one brother doesn't eat burritos now. I get that. I understand that, but... What was in there? This is the question we're asking.

You see which way you can take it? Absolutely. Could be a vehicle. Could be a body part. We're not going to judge. We just want to hear. If you have something that you don't want to talk about on air, text us. 04-8-8-106-9.

You can remain anonymous, on air or off. Yeah, if you want to keep that secretive. What was in there? What was in there? Where was it? And remember, you need length and girth in this league. That's right. Own up now.

What was in there? What was in there? What was in there? Doesn't have to be an orifice. No. That's maybe where your mind first went. Yep. Could be anything.

What was in there? Could have been what was in your letter box. An ER doctor has shared. He's a doctor of the strange. He calls himself. How's this? This is an American study, but this is classic. 2023, an American journal study of emergency medicine,

4,000 people are hospitalized with foreign objects in their rectum every year. 4,000. I actually thought it would be more. The average of a patient visiting the emergency room was 43 years old. 78% of these patients were male. Oh, please. 93 years old. That's old enough to know better.

Also old enough to experiment if you haven't yet. There's still time, you know what? Is that midlife crisis? Some men go out and buy a Mustang. Other men go, I haven't put that up my butt. Might as well try. Just looking at the same going, you know what? You know that would go well?

My rectum. Because I think men, now, pardon me for just. painting you all with a broad stroke. Here we go, here we go. You would do a massive poo and go, well, if that came out, what could go in? No, we see a child comes out of, you know, a lady, we go, well, surely, you know. If she could do what I can. Ladies describe pushing babies out, like pushing out a bowling ball.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And a guy goes, I'll see that. I'll show you. I'll get me candle and put it up there. Like this specific guy did in this story, what do you call the candles again? He called them Yankee. It's just a brand. We would have glass house.

They're thick white ones. Picture, your mom has a glass house candle in her house. They are girthy. Yep. I think the glass element also freaks me out like those. Because it can break in there. Absolutely. That's somewhere you don't want a shard.

I got told a story from a friend who works at a hospital who told me an emergency. And there was a glass thing up there and it snapped. Oh my God. But we got a few texting on the text line. Now the text line never disappoints. We got a text in from... My name is Timmy L. To Timmy L. All right, as opposed to Timmy J.

Yeah, maybe he thought Timmy J is contributing. I've got to make sure they know it's Timmy L. Don't give my full name it. Timmy L will get them. My girlfriend put one of those hard things up my butt and it snapped and we couldn't get it out not to have a six-hour surgery to remove it. I then replied saying, how was the recovery? That's because you're kind and empathetic person.

I just want to know. Very sore, six months when I went to the toilet. I think Timmy's having us on. But how's this? We've got another text. I think this one's real. Okay. No name.

Let's just say this is Timmy F. I have a friend who was an anesthetist. A guy from a buck's night was dared to stick a dildo up his butt. And doing so, it ruptured his bowls. Idiot. Now that I can believe. Oh, my God. Rupured his bow.

Yeah, yeah. That I believe. Oh, my God. That is either going up with quite a bit of force or it's that. And also, like, are the boys all standing around watching? Like, do it. Do it! What goes on it?

Oh, man, trust me. You don't want to know. David. Hello, David. David. David. Hello, guys. Hi.

Yeah, good. Are you taking us out of the butt world? Yeah, please, Dave. Or are we staying in the butt world? No, definitely so far away from the butt world. Thank God. Let's bring a bit of decorum back to this program. David, answer the question.

What was in there? Sorry. So, we pretty much went. out for a night out on the drink and I thought it was smart to buy five kilos of bird seed and put all over me mate's car but in the meantime I deliberately put it all through his air

conditioning vent so in the morning there were birds all over it and then we thought oh how hot is it forgot about it turned the aircon on and it covered all the inside of the car so all the birds are just blown into the interior of the

car do you go how did this happen you're like I don't I don't know how this happened mate I don't know. Where did this come from? Yep, now it was quite an eventful trip home. Absolutely, it would have been. See, there's two different types of groups of boys, Ducker. You've got the one group of boys at the Bucks Party doing that to Bards. And then David and his friends going, ha-ha.

He clearly is dumb. We're a special species, aren't we? Just as dumb. This is why we maintain women live longer. What would you prefer? The boys stand around watching you put something up your rectum or putting a full car full of bird seed. What do you think?

The rectum. Jess and Ducco. Look, everyone needs a side hustle. It's tough times. You know, you can't be a one brand man. No. You've got to diversify sometimes. Absolutely.

And that applies to young Shah guy as well. About 48 hours ago on this program, Ducko, we were talking about him entering the influencer space. Yeah, what could he do? What could he do when it comes to SpawnCon? You know, the 14 followers he has on Instagram, how could he be selling better to them to make a quick buck in his back pocket? Yeah, yeah.

This is how it played out early. this week. If any brand would like to do some sponsored content with shy guy in it, I'm happy to feel some pictures. What's a long thin brand? Like chopper chopsticks? Oh, yeah, that's a good one. Yeah.

Cycle on icebox? You know, the old school candy cigarettes. Are that still a thing? Yeah. That's good. Let's workshop bananas. Long and thin. So we put it out to the universe, Daco.

Basically manifested. a few things because we were inundated. Brands wanting to work with shy guy. Now, you know, I like to check the DMs on Instagram and I said, shy guy, here we got time to step up, baby. The first one, when we talk about long and thin, tell me if he's influenced you to buy this for your next fishing adventure.

Hey, has anyone seen my shy man o? You looking for me? No, shy guy. I said shy man. Oh, shimon-oh. You mean the superior fishing rod? They might be long and thin, but they're made of a 24-ton graphite blank, which means they cast a mile and are extremely responsive for catching everything from Malloway to sharks. Plus, they're built with added comfort for prolonged sessions. Am I right? Oh, shy guy.

BCF got in touch, Darko, that's a big brand. I'm just surprised you've read. How long did it tell you to read that script. Don't. It took so long. We were in there wherever. We know. Babs, thank God you were there to coach and also contribute. Babs was great in that ad.

Hey, oh, you know, you. I'm surprised she didn't do her southern American accent. We've been into that territory in another day. That's great from Shagai. He goes, yeah, it's one thing for me to be the ambassador. Let me rope in me friends. Yeah, I love it. So I hope Babs is getting a deal on some, uh, the fishing roll.

If she wants a fishing rod, we can make that. Brilliant. I love fishing. It's BCF and fun. But it doesn't stop there. What else do we have? Another brand we often talk about in association with Shy Guy. I thought, wow, this is our opportunity to get involved and have this man be the voice of one of our best selling products.

Hi, I'm shy guy. And when I'm not working 40-hour weeks or getting great business tips from Bonnie Blue, I love knitting little booties for stray cats at my local pet rescue. To guarantee a pleasant and long-lasting knitting experience, I only use Semco. Semcoe knitting needles have a patented cooling metal surface allowing your needles to easily slip through and between all fibre types. Yarn. No issue. Wool?

Give me a real challenge. Nylon. Bring it on. Available at all good spotlights. Spotlight, baby. That was the hardest one to read that one. Really? That was the hardest ad, yeah. A minute.

Yeah. I don't know what the exact line was, but I had to do about 40 times. Well, there's a note maybe for Spotlight. Don't tell us, man. People want to work with you again. Exactly. No, that'll work. But you know what?

He got it done. Yeah, he did. And I'm influenced now to only buy Semcoe knitting needles. Me too. The superior long and thin knitting needle. Obviously. But it doesn't stop there. What else did we have?

Another one? We've gone to fresh produce, ducco. A particular vegetable that went, we're not getting enough attention. Oh yeah. How are we going to get into the? shopping baskets of fruit and veg shoppers at their local supermarket, I know, will hire Shy Guy to get our message out there. Hi, I'm Shy Guy, and you don't get to be as long and thin as me without copping a few

UTIs in your lifetime. Good news is, I've got a mate who can help with any junk funk. You'll find him hanging out of the fresh produce section at your local supermarket. Asparagus. Naturally high in vitamin K and B6, it'll help keep your Python clear. That's good news when you find out it's all. also an aphrodisiac. So this spring,

spear yourself in the right direction, straight to a bunch of asparagus. That's funny, because a single asparagus is called a spear. Now, with that ad. There's a disclaimer at the M.A. Hang on. Authorised by Shy Girls Asparagus Spear UTI.

No, that wasn't meant to be read. So on the script. So when the team at Asparagus reached out, they just wanted to make it clear. Asparagus A. Asparagus A. Spargas R-R-R-S. When they did,

They obviously gave a bit of direction and they wanted to make sure shy guy and you, a single asparagus is called a spear making their tagline very humorous. I see. I see. He freaking read the stage direction. He freaking read the state's direction. He read the client on the script at the end and said MB, and I

said to do get audio producer said, I don't know who NB is, but I'm going to read this line. They were just trying to help. So then we go. You've just heard the start at the end of Shy Guy's Ambassad of Korea. And I don't have a UTI.S. I'll make that clear. Jess and Ducco. I've discovered I'm a sicko.

Just recently discovered this. I could have told you that five years ago, brother. I'll sit on a different area, okay? So I, you know, recently you've heard about my lawn journey with the victim, you know, the lawn morrow I got. It was very much turned 30 and chose lawn as one of your passions. Well, golf and lawn. I can't smoke me. They do, you know, I love, God, God, I love turf.

You love a well landscaped area, whether it's your front yard or 18 holes. 100%. I used to hate doing the lawn so. much. And when it gets hotter, like it is now, like the grass is growing a quick around. When winter, the beauty is, you don't have to do it as much. I used to love that. I never felt... You love a boggy lawn. A boggy soggy log. I love the sod. I never felt the urge like other dudes. You'd be like, oh, God, I get the mower out and get excited. I never felt it.

No, I love the soul. Everybody loves the sow. It's just for us, that one. It's just a... I'm not mad about it. I'm very niche. But I now found myself, what I'm doing is I'm laying the pole. pipe to my wife to do the mowing? Like, I'm trying to, like, lay pipe to get permission to do mowing? Like, are you looking ahead to weekend? Well, I'll see, oh, geez, like, oh, geez, the lawn's getting a bit long, don't you reckon? And then the next day we'll come out.

Oh, God, how wild. I did that lawn to, how wild it's quick, it's growing. I better get back out there with me new mower, maybe me whippersnipper. I'll set a time, and I'm like, maybe, what are you doing Thursday? What day is it? Is it Sunday? And you're going, what are we doing the lawn during the week? Because then on the weekend, I can admire it.

You know what I mean? And then you can enjoy your lawn. But then we've got to plan around my daughter's sleep times, all the stuff. And it just gets me out of doing dad duties because I've got to do the law. So, you know. I would say that's in the remit of dad duties. To be very stereotypical, it does fall into it. You put your big bunnings wide brim on.

I enjoy putting that thing on now. You put your pink zinc on your nose and cheeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Put my jock strap on because I'm getting my buttocks tan. I just go out there and I just do the lawn. You hate a tan line. It feels so weird. but I've already been laying the seed to do it this week.

I love it. Morgan will find, we can't do it Thursday. My cousin's here. I'm like, well, okay. Well, no, but isn't that even better? Let's get it done before the cousin gets here. We don't want her to judge us on these unkept lawn. She'll call child services on us.

She'll take her away. Here's my issue, though. Morgan is now trying to claim that I can't go to the gym and do lawn in one day. It's like pick. And I'm like, are you joking? No, I'm with it. So you have a new boy in the house. It's one activity a day.

It's either an hour and half of the lawn or an hour for the gym. you pick. I'm like, can I do both? She's like, nope. You know what you should do? Take a leaf out of my husband's book and just buy 15 businesses. Ah, I'm flat chat babe. I've got to go here. I've got to go there. I've got a meeting for this. I've got a meeting for that. When really, you're just

getting some you timing. Are you saying your husband's just sitting in a car crying? Well, how busy can one person be? Stay home. Jess and Daco One second song game. Hucko's going to play one

second, a tiny snippet of a song. We're going to try and identify that song. Title and artist, of course. Yeah, a bit of fun, this one. Gets you all involved. It keeps all the kids happy. This theme is AFL and NRL artists. They've played at the pre-match entertainment. Over the years, okay? Of course, we've just had Snoop Dog at the AFL. We've got Teddy Swims coming up this Sunday for the NRL. Yes. But, I mean, this has been a ritual for many, many years. That's a lot of us.

us to go through. Some you might not know. Some you might not have realized they did that. Okay. Here we go. Here is the first second of the first song. One more time. It's not jet.

No. Am I out now? Um, yep. Come on, Babs. This is your... Oh. Oh. Wait, I know that song.

Yeah. Trust me, guys are going to kick yourselves. when you don't get this. Australian. Not Australian. It was at the AFL. I'll say, no, sorry, NRL. Behind these hazel eyes.

Oh, bang. I had to sing it until I got to that. Pardon him one. Kelly did it. NRL 2003. Oh, wow. She must not have been as big. Yeah, yeah.

That's how they got it. She wasn't as big then. No, she would have been earlier because it wasn't, oh, wow. That's wigged me out. This one should be a little bit easier for the team. Here we go. Song two. Oh,

Kid Roy. No. Girls. Shy Guy with two. His last year's NRL. He was last year's NRL Grand Final. Bonus points. Very good.

Okay, here we go. This should keep Jess in the game. Come on, ABA. Here we go. I don't think Abba performed it either F or Rural. No. But this person did. Oh, Robbie Williams.

Get away. Get away. You could say get lost. Was that a time? I feel like that was a great. tie between you two. Do you want to tie it? You're the score, man. Yeah, okay. So, Shaw goes on, three, Babs is on one. Okay.

Come on, Jess. Come on, Jess. Here we go. This is an interesting one. This, I didn't realize. Oh, the In Excess and Terris Park. I mocked that one up, so I was meant to go. But yes, Babs, you got it, you got it. Inexcess, Never Terris Apart, played 2010.

AFL. So Michael Hutchins died in 97. So it was with their new front man that they got. There you go. Isn't it so funny. We'll talk about In Excess just moments ago. I know. One of the dude's daughters just got married. I think she's on Neighbors,

and he sang that for their first dance. Like, magical. It's never the same without Michael Hutchins, though. No, I was wondering who he was. It sounded good. I was watching the performance. It's just not the same. Yeah, yeah, okay.

Okay, here we go. Well done. So Babs is now on two shy guys on three. Jess. Come on. You need to go here. Tell me you put meatloafins on there. These two won't know meatloafloat.

No, we won't. Oh, last asked of Rich and Famous and Good Chillet. Can you turn them down? Lifestyle, the rich of the famous. Good Charlotte, 2012 NRL. That would have been sick. That's another tie. That's another tie.

So, it's been Babs is on three, shot guys on four. Yeah, but this one's worth 15. Jess, you're out. Okay, the song's worth 15. Okay, here we go. Here we go. Oh, oh, oh, that's John Farnham.

You're the voice. Oh, Bab's got the whole thing. You've got to say the title of an artist. I said the title first, but all right, whatever. She's one by... No, she's on tie. It's a tie. It all comes down to this.

It all comes down to this. Now, this one, I need both artists. Both artists. There we go. Good luck players. Jess, you're out. No, I want to play. Don't worry.

I won't get it. Oh, Katie Perry is a new dog. California goes. Well, you didn't finish the census. So Katie Perry, of course, played last year. NFL Sneak Dog played this year. I thought it'd be fun to finish on both. So, shy guys said it, but then Bab sneaks in with the,

But the name. I did steal it. Sorry. My goodness. I stopped. And you were up ahead, too. What did it at my year 9 PE teacher always say, don't pull up till you cross the finish line.

That's a lesson for life, shy guy. It is Mr. Reed, words of wisdom. Well done. Thank you. There you go. I think I tried really hard. Jess and Ducko. These two have been up to something, Ducko.

Some high jinx to better support you and your cohort of Broncos. Of course, the Broncos making it into the grand final. If we have a moment for how nice that piece of Fox League music is at the start. It's a bloody beautiful composition. Just someone playing the keys at the start, getting the keys in there before it goes into this? If you played this for me at any other time of year, I would not connect it with the footy. It's a stunning piece of music.

Beautiful piece of music. Do you reckon the person at the start who played those keys was like just really wanted to get it in there? And that's, I don't know, did he win a bet? Or was he like on his last legs? And they went, all right. Throw him a bone. Let it hear it. All right, take it away, mate.

Yeah, anyway, it's gorgeous. NRL final, Broncos versus Storm this Sunday, as everyone knows, everyone knows I'm a Bronco supporter. It's been a topsy-turvy roller coaster of a week from you. Yeah, yeah. I started off on Monday saying I'm not going because I went on 23 with a mate and they lost to Penrith and it just destroyed myself. You won this mate, potentially a bad luck duo. You said, I'm going to remove myself for the betterment of the team. Yesterday, 24 hours after that statement,

you went, ah, tickets are falling in my lap. Well, here I go. Stuff the superstition. I'll run the back, maybe. Even though a legitimate Bronco player has said, you've heard you bad luck, don't bring that juju to the stadium. Benny Hunt came on and said,

Don't come, Ducco. Beny Hunt genuinely came on. Yeah. the curse, that is me going to the final. Yeah. So we have paid money. You're not going to get this for free. Mate, no witch is free.

When was the last time you got a free witch? Never. Anyway, we've gone to the psychic nunna. Oh, sorry. You mean nomana? Are you mispronouncing? Nona. She's in Turkey.

Yeah, she is in Turkey. Well, then it would have been non. She's in Turkey. It's not the psychic. Did you give someone in Turkey money on our work credit card? Absolutely, we did. And then the card got walked. Because we tried to buy something else later and didn't work.

Oh, no. It's been picked the falcon. The A&Z Falcon has gone, oh. Oh, wait a minute. All right. So you've gone to the psychic nunner. Yeah. And it's funny how quickly it adds up.

Because on the website, it says $6.30. Yeah. And then you say, I want. Is that in lira or in dollars? That's in AUD. We're in AUD. And then as soon as it says, when do you want it? We said an hour.

Yeah. Took about 12. Did you pay for an hour? Yeah, we paid for one hour turnaround. We had to warm up. That was an extra 10. Oh, time different. We didn't know if it was in Turkey.

Do Witcher's sleep, though? I wouldn't have thought so. No, they're ready on demand, I thought. Yeah. And then it was... For six bucks, you better be ready when I'm ready. Oh, yeah. So the option was to get a manifestation.

Yep. And a blessing. Yep. That was a premium package. So that's what we got. Oh, you got the premium. Wow. We got the premium package with one hour delivery, but it turned out to be 12, but that's okay.

Okay. Should we get Jonathan Dirsten or the coach or stuff? Like, they need to be hearing this. How far this show was gone to get them over the line. Jonathan Thurston. The only person. The former Cowboys player now commentator. Has he got nothing to do with the Broncos?

You've been Darren Lundon. I took an absolute swing man. You took a plant. I would have done with that thing. Makes my mind. Anyway. Wally Lewis. Should we get Joey Jones on? Wally?

Is he here? Yeah, Wally, yep. Yeah, yeah. I get my maroons and my Broncos confused. Yeah, the name wrong too. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway.

Press on, press on. So she's got to come back? So I've got. a witch has come back. Doing a manifestation and a blessing. We've given her all of the information she needs, including all of your personal information. Yes.

Oh, God. Thanks so much. I thought my bank account was low. Our bank account, but everything else was you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then. She's going to rock up on your door.

If you get followed by a ducco with two O's today, it ain't me. No, it's definitely not. And then in lies her response, which Babs will read out now. Oh, are you channeling Nuna? Yeah, so how do you want me to do it? With your hat on.

Well, I want you to build a little witch? I want to call you. close my eyes and feel like Nuna is in the room. And I need to find some music to play because I'm getting blessed. I feel like... Oh, this is not... I don't know if the Pope's going to be happy to you. Take music. I don't know what else to put on.

It's either that I'm doing the Zorba, so, you know, come on. Come on, Babs. Do you a witch thing. Actually, you know what we can do? Hello. Nah, no, we'll go back to Jerusalem. Take it seriously, right? I am, I am. This is your team. Yeah, this is for me. What am I doing?

All right. She said, when I look at the energy surrounding this year's grand final I see a different tone than before last time you went you carried expectations heavy like a stone almost as though you were bracing for the worst that vibration can weigh down the joy

this time the choice is to walk into the stadium not as someone who must control the outcome but as someone who blesses the team with loyalty and good spirit no matter what unfolds I bless you now with release from the superstition of bad luck Carrying that belief only feeds fear And fear has no place in a celebration of strength and sport You are not curse Nick

You're a supporter whose energy counts in lifting the atmosphere If you choose to attend on Sunday Go as a beacon of positive intention Before you leave for the match, close your eyes Breathe in deeply three times And say to yourself, I carry joy, not fear I carry hope, not burden I'm here to cheer, not to control.

I'm here to cheer. I'm going to have to write that down, I'll forget that. Yeah, you will. So should you go? Yes, if your heart wants you to be there. Do not let an old shadow keep you from living the memory you deserve. Whether the Broncos win or lose, you will have claimed your place as a true supporter.

Standing in loyalty rather than fear. That is not bad luck, that is love. With warmth and blessings. Not finished. Geez, I'll tell you what, she's used chat GPT 100%. Yeah, we paid her to do something we could have done for $40 Australian dollars for a witch in Turkey to put into chat GPT. Yep.

And she couldn't tell us who would win because that would be a betting thing. It is against the witch code. Witches have codes. Apparently. I feel lighter. Can you give me what I need to say in acre? I'll go in on the weekend. Three deep breaths.

I'll take deep breaths. And don't you be doing it in your head. No, no, no, I'll be out loud. I'll get my mates to film it. I'll be half cut by then. I carry joy, not fear. I carry joy, not fear. I'm here to cheer.

I'm here to cheer. Not to control. Not to control. I carry hope. I carry hope. Not burden. Not burden. That's what you have to say.

I think of it's an amen or something. Yeah. Second answer. Ten questions. We'll start with the same letter. I have to take your first answer. Can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. We come back, of course, if there is time. Now we are playing for $10,000. Our player today, K-pop, we got Christy.

Hello, Christy. Hello? Christy. Oh, no. Christy, you have a chance to. Hello. Oh, there, how we got you? Thank gracious.

Oh, God. What's going on? Christy, take two steps to the left. Yes, okay. I'm here. That's better. The left always works. The left always works.

Christy, you're ready to play for 10 grand. Yes, please. What are you going to spend the money on? Well, my husband wants a you be a fancy coffee maker for Christmas, so I'll probably spend a fair chunk of it on one that can practically make it itself. Yeah, you need at least, what, 1,500, 1,500 put away on one of those. Oh, I mean, you may be away for Black Friday or something, but otherwise, geez, you could sink a pretty, your panty into a nice coffee machine.

Christy, this is great synergy because if you don't win today, I guess he's stuck drinking Ness Cafe. You're playing with the letter N. Okay, cool. The Ness Cafe. Are you ready to rock? Yes.

Your time will start after the first. She sounds out of breath. I know. She ran to the left. The game has not started. She didn't take two steps. She bolted. Are you right, Christy, take a deep breath in

and a deep breath out, clench on clench. I'm good. Okay. Your time will start up at the first question. Starting with the letter N, we need you to name a shoe brand. A path. A periodic element. Nitrogen.

A country. Nigeria. A six-letter word. Knox. An R&B singer. Melly. An adverb. Nearly.

An animal. A night rabbit A fruit A body part A reality TV show The old night rabbit Hey I hate them

They are tearing up my yard Is it a wallaby that we're looking for there The old night rabbit looks kind of like a rabbit I think they're around at night I think they're nocturnal I love it Christy The bilby Be honest you pull that out your bump

I don't know what do you want to that count from Google Night Rabbit Shire I want to see what pops up We've got to make sure I just want to make sure I didn't give it to you Look you got yourself

Six A shoe brand could have been Off the bat Nike or New Balance And then what else An animal The Naur Wall or the Newt Is what we're looking for there

It's not a snake It's a newt Exactly Everything else you answer You did get correct And you do get a hundred dollars Fuel thanks to our Brian You don't get the cash

Where do we stand on the night rabbit Shire guy There's no such thing rabbits are not nocturnal. Christy, we love to learn on this show and you have now just taught us no such thing as a night rabbit. Yeah, yeah.

We all know now the night rabbit doesn't exist. Then it wasn't a total loss. It wasn't. No, we all learnt and you get petrol. Great attitude. Thanks, Christy. Thank you. See you later.

We play again tomorrow, 630 and 8 for $10,000. But up next, Ducco, we've got that call of fame. Come on, I want more people in with a chance to see Teddy Swim, so we best ask a question. Yeah. You went out for X, but you came home with Y. You had a mission to get something, but my God, didn't you pivot at the last minute? I thought we were doing mass equations there for a bit.

No, no, that's not our strong suit. Jess and Duckow. 131060. You went out for, but you came home with something else. I posted on the weekend, Ducko, just a little story. Yeah. Because something in my 34 years happened that has never happened before. that I've got to document this.

Tell my community. I went to the shops to buy pears and buttermilk. And I came home with... What are you using for buttermilk? I was making a tart. Oh, you were making a tart? I was making a tart. Yes, yes, it was a saddie.

I was making a tart. I'm making my way through Alice and Roman's cookbook, and I'm in the dessert section now. She had a caramelized apple tart. I prefer a pear tart. And I went, I'm going to substitute because now I'm getting cocky in the kitchen. So I went, well, instead of buying apples, I buy our pears. You can't be making tart and not bring it in. You know what?

It was that good. We devoured it over the weekend. I would love to make you another tart. I'd love another tart. Would you prefer apple? You want me to go, O.J, because that's what the recipe called for. I think Babs is an apple gal. Shaggy, like apple.

All right, I'll go. I'm making the pie crust, ducco. Oh, what? Look at you guys. Put a little dab of flour on me nose. I am doing my baking best. So, but I needed. The two things I didn't have in the house were the pears and the buttermilk.

That's her secret, the buttermilk. But I went to the shops, bought pears and buttermilk and realized, oh my God, this is the first time in history that I only bought what I set out to buy. You know, you always go to the shops and go, I probably should get toilet paper while I'm here. Oh, geez, I'm going, oh, geez, why not? I've walked back into the apartment going, holy crap, this has never happened before. Put it on Instagram. and it's funny because my followers went,

oh my God, I've never done that. In fact, I usually set out for X, but come home with Y. Some of my favourite contributions, Steph. Well, you're better than the time my dad and I went out for the paper, came home with a budgie, named him Simon. Mum was not impressed. That's a pivot.

That's a pivot. Because like the paper store and the budgie store and not in the same store. That's 100%. Because I love the idea, dad's gone, get out of the house. We'll give mum some just quiet time. We'll go get the paper, maybe run some errands. Wait a minute, now you've brought home a bird. And that becomes mum's problem.

Absolutely. Kirsten gets in touch. I went shopping for curtains. Came home with a Toyota Cluger. That is some great car salesman. Yeah, yeah. And I said, you're going to have to explain that. She went, well, it's actually happened more than once.

What? What do you mean? She went, well, the first time went out to buy the curtains, drove past the Toyota dealership and was just lured in by, take a test drive today. Fell in love with the Kluger, brought it home. Two years later, went to buy milk, got distracted. Went and bought a Holden Tracks.

Three years ago, I was off to do the food shopping. Same thing. Went to have a look at a new Mitsubishi eclipse. Ended up buying it. This person is burning through cars. Yeah, I know. Just burning. Are they trading all these in?

I said, what are you talking about? Kirsten. She goes, it's all right. It was my birthday. Okay. That's doing all right. Every year she goes out for something around her birthday. Treats herself to a car.

But there was an intriguing response. One of Bab's many second cousins. Ask Babs, messages me, goes, Ask Babs about the time Damo came home with a boat. Now, Damo is her father. Babs, what's up with Damo coming home with a boat? You know what? He could hardly remember what happened.

He's your second cousin remembers. No, because Damo was drunk. Yeah, probably. He literally just went out for the day, had nothing to do. So I think he just walked into a boat shop and just bought a boat. Hell yeah. Oh, so that's not even, I went for X and came home with what. It's like a ski boat.

Just walking past the boat store. Ooh, I must buy a boat today. Kirsten's next door, getting the holding tracks. These are big buys. I was thinking this was going to be all low-key buys. Oh, man. People are going crazy. I like this one.

Kathy, a long time ago, my dad went out for Sigis, came home with a goat. He bought it home in the back seat of his courtina, but we had a paved backyard, all concrete. So we took it to Manonnas house, but it. ate all her plans, and then got into the house, slept in her bed. She was convinced it was a husband reincarnated because he'd passed away a few years ago. True story. And Nonna kept the goat. Nonna kept the goat.

Because then she thought, ah, well, this is Giuseppe. Giuseppe, my husband. Reincarnated. That's brilliant. So 13, 1060, you went out for, but you came home with. You went out for Petard. You came home with a Toyota Kluger. Give us a call.

Get you on. Jess and ducco. You went out for... Hmm. But you came home with... Hmm. I surprised the world. Yeah.

By going out for pears and butter milk and only returning with pears and buttermilk. But sharing that on my Instagram had people going, wow, you're stronger than me. Like Kell, who said, I went out for a coffee one time, walked past a poultry auction. came home with a peacock. People are people getting these random? And where are you finding, like, goats and peacocks? Bianca, my husband took our four-year-old out for lunch, came home with a pet snake.

A lot of creatures coming home. I mean, yeah, we've come home with a dog once to Dad. Yeah. We went out to go to the shops and came home with the dog with RSPCA. So you were going for groceries? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Walk past the RSPN and went, well, we've got to get him. Yeah, we got.

Was that Fred? That was Fred. Shut up. R-I-P Fred. Oh. But it's not always pet stucco. Lisa, and this is the site I imagine it happens a lot, went to

Eldie for party pies. Yeah. Came home with solar powered garden lights and no party pies. See, that makes the most sense out of everything that's been said. That makes the absolute most sense. Totally. But we wanted to ask. Yeah. On 131060, remember that Call of Fame, the Teddy Swims tickets.

Nikki, you went shopping for X, but you came home with Y. Hi. I actually went shopping to print off a photo and come home with a 75 inch TV. You're like, I'm going to do some

life admin. I wanted to print and frame these things for ages. You needed to do it for ages. But wait a minute, that TV's looking good. I didn't do it once. I've done it twice. What, buying a TV? No, then I went shopping for motorbike gloves and come home with a

$4,000 dollar lounge suite instead. That's a pivot. That is absolutely money on the gloves. And I've got a new gloves. Yeah, that's actually the question. Did you end up buying the gloves? No, I forgot. Now she's broke.

We got a Brett on 13, 1060. Brett, you went out for but came home with? Yeah, I went out to buy a new Harley because I sold me Harley a while back. And then I thought, oh, yeah, the wife gave me permission. I work pretty hard. I'll go and get myself a new Harley. And I'll come home with a new Havel instead and give it to the wife. And I said, well, she deserves that.

And I think today she still loves that car more than me. Wait a minute. So you went to replace your motorbike but instead bought your wife a car. Yes, I did. Yeah, a brand new Havel. Was she happy with the Havel? Was she like, oh, why did you do that, Brett? Oh, she just said, yeah, I think she was a bit of a bit in shock.

But I'll do some weird things. Don't worry about that. You sound like an absolute rogue unit, Brett. Brett, you work hard. You can do whatever you want. That's right. But now how's Brett getting around? You didn't replace your bike?

I actually went and bought myself a new car after I bought an aircraft. There was always a cat. It was always a cat. That's great stuff. Joanne, what did you go shopping for? Instead of shopping, I went to drop my daughter up to a friend's house, then came home with a tattoo. Okay.

Oh. Okay, so there wasn't even a shopping trip planned in that. Drove past the tattoo store and went, ooh. Today's the day. What did you get, Joanne? A little one or a big one? No, just my daughter's name on my foot. That's so sweet.

So you've dropped her off, gone, I miss her. I'm going to get her inked on my foot. Oh, no. Well, I had the other one already on the foot, so I kept me out. Yeah, right. So I still, my husband came home and my husband's like, where have you been? I just got your own tattoo. And he's like, where's my name?

Sonia, good morning. Good morning. You went shopping for X, but came home with Y? Well, we actually went to a heavy horse day, like to watch the Clydesdale's and how they long rain them. Ah, yeah. This was when we were living in Mudgy. And we came home with a camel.

So you're only meant to be a spectator. At the Clydesd's house. But obviously this camel spoke to you and went... Look how many hump's that? Is that a three hump? She's coming home. Mom, we've got to get it. Well, it actually...

It was actually a hands-on thing. And there was a guy there with a mule. And the guy that had the mule. fuel, we went to have a look. Our kids were little, and he had a camel for sale, so we bought it. But then we had to find the camel of friends, so about a year later, we bought another camel, and I had a baby camel that I raised, and then we had another two camels, so he had four camels. What's the going right for a camel?

How much do the initial camel cost? They're like horses. I mean, if they're trained and things like that, they go for more, but, you know, you pay $1,000, $2,000 for a camel. Sonia, but I know you were going to the horse show, but did you have a way to transport the camel home? Actually, no, and that turned into a bit of a dilemma because camels don't fit on a horse trailer or anything like that.

And they're too tall? Yeah, so we had to hire a horse transport guy, and he actually had transported a lot of different types of animals, but he actually said that he'd never transported a camel before. He's got a first. He just ride the camel home. Wow, yeah, could you, did you consider doing a train? Yeah, on the camel.

Well, the camel had never been ridden. It's been a paddock camel. What kind of camel did you buy? He's been $2,000 on a camel. It's never ridden. How many humps do this camel have, Sonia? In Australia, they only have one. One hump in Australia.

I didn't know that. I didn't know that either. Are you telling me double humpers are a figment of my imagination? Or they're only overseas? No, no. Overseas. So in Australia, we have dromederies and they're single hump. Yeah. You might see double humps in the zoo.

with something like that's where I've seen it. But you'll talk about triple humpers. Yeah, well, you know, that's a rare, it's a rare day when the Duckman spots a triple hump. Is that when a dromedary, a single humper? Yeah. Has a baby with a double hump. Absolutely. Oh, that's a good question for Sonia.

If a two humper has a baby with a single hump, how many humps will they have? Well, that doesn't happen. What do you mean? She's like, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard, Dugger. Sonia, we've got a story on this show or a shark impregnated, a still. rate. You're telling me a single humper can't be impregnate a double humper. No.

No. I love it in the disgusting. Never heard of it. Never. Stop you guys. Anyway, that's a good story, so I don't appreciate it. That's unreal. I can't believe you ended up with four camels. It's only meant to be a spectator that day. Let's wrap it up with Courtney. I'm enjoying these. Courtney, hello.

Hi. What did you go shopping for initially, Courtney? I went to go sign up for the gym And I left with a date And now we have two kids And we've been together for eight years He was a PT at the gym or the guy signed me up On that first visit, Courtney

Yeah That's amazing What do you remember what he said that got you over the line Was there a pickup line or something? He's not too bad to look at A couple of times Couple of biceats Life is pretty good right now

Except for me Is it? Yeah, not for me Is it? Had a horrid night Had a horrid night So As you know, Pam, my dog

Temperamental, beautiful little thing I'm actually like five and a half now She's nearly six. Wild. Where's the time? That is wild I still remember When you and Morgan brought her home

Yeah We went out for a cattle dog And came home with whatever she is Came home with a bitzer Who has given you I don't want to say a run for your money. Yeah, yeah. She certainly drained a lot of your money.

Pet insurance was the best thing we ever did for that dog. Do we have time to run through her medical history? She remember we went blind. She went blind. Her retinas detached and then it was fine again. She needs medicinal marijuana just to get through the day. She's puffing that thing like Snoop. Doesn't she?

Isn't she like allergic to the sun or grass? No, she has a, yeah, she's got sensitive. She got dermatitis. So grass and sand, you know, poor little thing. But she's also got an inverted vulva. Descendant of walls. Yeah, I know. She's also got an inverted vulva.

It gets chronic vaginitis. I mean, it always sounds bad to say, but it's just what she gets. Of all the cards, you've been dealt. And let's look, in just two years alone, Dugger, you've been dealt some tough cards. Nothing tougher, though, than your dogs. Hey, man, they're all beautiful and they're all unique. They're all unique. However, I've never learned so much about, I've got to catch the Wii when she does

things. So basically. It sounds the reason the universe gave you a daughter in human form because you've had so much of all for experience. Who's the vulva guy? Here he comes. Oh, yeah, I've seen plenty. Put my gloves on?

You've seen the worst. Yeah, yeah. You can deal with anything. Yeah. But I cannot believe we're having the... I feel deja vu. Yeah, so last night, when Pam gets like some form of UTI or something going on,

she goes to wee, and then she can't. And then you can tell it's painful that she's hurting. And then nothing comes out. And then she goes to find another spot, then nothing comes out. So usually it's anybody, it goes to the vet, whatever. The worst is when it happens overnight. So like last night, She gets off the bed, and some reason she comes to me.

What time is it? Like, you're sleeping? So there's only 10.30, right? So I go to bed. I've got to bed early last time. I went to bed at like 8.45 thinking, going to get a great sleep. 1030, I hear this like, oh, boom, boom. I'm like, look over, and she's next to me.

I'm like, oh, she obviously needs a toilet. That Morgan's not a toilet. It's not my child. Which one is it? I let her out. She goes and does a wee, and then I'm like, okay, come inside. Then she scurries her and does another way. And then she runs past me to the back of the house.

Because when Pam gets embarrassed, She doesn't want to do her business in front of you She wants to hide in the back of the house I'm like some dogs who lock eye contact As they drop a deuce Your dogs goes, I need a minute I need a minute So I had to go to the back of the house

I'm like come on Pam What are you doing? I can tell she was trying And then then she did a poo And I was like okay maybe that was it So she comes back inside Daddy up and not doing it on the bed Yeah she's good like that

So she comes inside She goes back under the duna We all go back to sleep I'm sleeping I wake up 1 30 in the morning this time And I'm like Oh, okay. So, Morgan's still asleep, obviously.

He has no idea what's going on. She's definitely awake. She's like, if I lay still, if I lay perfectly still, I can get up. She's like, I've got the daughter. She's not the vulva guy. They need the vulva expert, honey, it's you as I go out. Pam does the same thing again, the same routine. But no, wee's coming out now.

And then runs to the backyard, and I go to the backyard. It's at 1.30 the morning. I'm like, come on, Pam, come on. She's trying to we so much. Like, she's obviously just like clenching and squeezing everything. She just goes And then she thinks she's done And comes back inside

She's like something's been expelled from this body I think I can go back in the bed We go back to bed And Morgan's like what was that? I was like I think Pam's got a UTI We're just going to have to ride this one out And then 3am I have not slept now well

Because I couldn't get back to sleep After the second time Because now you're just thinking about your dog's UTI Yeah well now I'm thinking about is Yeah the vulva in the UTI And then your mind is running I can't sleep I reckon took me an hour to get to sleep

And then at 3am She goes again And I'm like And this time she's in more pain. I'm like, oh my God. Is that how fast? They sort of ramp up. Yeah, it'll speed up and speed up. And then all of a sudden it's the point where

she's unbearably whining. You've got to take a vet, has an antibiotic, and she's good to go. It's a process I reckon I've been I've been with like six or seven times. You should just be able to walk into the pet doctor, the vet. And be able to be like, punch my loyalty card. I need another round of antibiotics. And every time

we should do some urine samples and just check. I'm like, no, mate. We know what it is. Trust me, I've done this. Yeah, I can't give her cranberry juice. Give me the pill. And there's a surgery she can get to change the vulva shape. And I'm like, I'm just not doing it. Oh, my God.

Yeah, you can do that. Can you reverse the inversion? Yeah. And then all of a sudden, so we go outside. There's a period. We're outside. This is the third time. It's like 3 a.m.

And my alarm's going off for like an hour. And by this stage, I'm so sleep deprived. So I just start doing a bushwee. I'm in the yard. I'm so I don't care. And then I'm doing a wee next to Pam who's trying to do a wee. She's struggling, farting. She's probably throwing out from the breakfast up.

To it looking in circles, hiding around the backyard. I was like, oh. Now, Doug, was that the right thing to do? You easily wee in front of your dog who's struggling. She would have been like, you bustling. I thought like the sound of me going might help her. It's like when you're busting, your friend's busting. You go, shh.

Exactly. Anyway. Did it help? No, no. She didn't do anything. Go back inside, barely going to sleep. Come to work. Morgan sends me a text being like, Pam's been fine this morning.

She's eating her breakfast. Everything's all good. I'm like, did you dream this? Yeah. I don't know what happens. to me last night. But I swear last night her vulva was playing up. Yeah, again, Morgan's not the vulgar.

You're the vulgar. This program, we have had some learnings today. We are a thinking man's program. Yes, we are. You don't need to go to the ABC or any of the AM channels to learn something. You can have a giggle with Jess and ducco and walk away with a tip of it. Cover it right here. I've got an RBA story for you tomorrow.

Maintain the cash rate. Interesting. Oh, my God, I thought you meant, what's the show, RBT? You thought it was doing breath tests. I thought it was doing breath test here. Waiting for a mate. RBA, great inflation. Of course, I'll be bringing that to you for a front.

It just feels like a Friday one for me. Absolutely. I've been holding it. In amongst the diary and giving away the call of fame, I'd love to get your hot take. Absolutely, you can. Thank you. Friday's a great show too, because we do have that, Dario. We do have the Friday banger.

Oh, that's right. Do we want to theme it this week? Do you want to theme it, the Lwako theme the one second song game? Finals artists. Finals, people. Or, yeah. I feel like you covered so many good. Or artists.

Wait, I mean, we can still do the song. That's true. Artists that have played in some sporting event. Shock on meatloaf. Oh, mate. Did anyone want? You can have it. You can have it.

You did not need a shock on that as quick as you did. Oh, damn. Meatloaf's gone. Oh, no. No, Babs would absolutely be wanting me. I actually like meatloaf. Yes, that means I'm cool. You've been off the boil lately, Bads.

You haven't really been winning as much. Watch out. I won last week No, you did it You did it We can do it We can do it We got to get

We'll workshop Make sure you're following us Jess and Ducker on Instagram Yes And that's where you can cast your vote We'll obviously play that song Yeah Tomorrow

Draw the Call of Fame We got shy guys And they are we We got We got What's a threesome Oh fun Yeah

Yeah Big day tomorrow For the team Massive Let's make sure Well you good luck Getting a good night's sleep I was going to say, let's all get a good rest.

Yep. But hard-pressed, maybe in your house, dealing with your daughters, sorry, your fur daughters. My fur daughters. UTI. I know. I don't, haven't had an update, so I don't know if we're going to take out of the vet or write it out. Earlier in the program, we heard Shy Guy started doing SponCon for asparagus. Yes.

Naturally high in vitamin K, good for UTIs. That's what she shouldn't need. Can you feed? Maybe check that with a vet. Yeah, I'll check that. I don't know if dogs can have asparagus for their UTI healing properties. Just broccoli. tomato, tomato.

That can't be too far away. Yeah, it can't be. Shigai is the asparagus person, the voice of asparagus. It can be tough to chew and digest, but it is safe to eat. For dogs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There you go. Might heal her.

I'm going to come to you for all asparagus things now, Shagga. I go with it, so come to me and I'll go to me. Hey, hey, don't reveal your secrets. You're the voice of asparagus. What are they paying you the big bucks for? They haven't landed in my account yet, so I'll let you know. We've got a few texting on the text line, as we always like to do in read them out towards the end of the show.

At 8 o'clock we were doing, you went out for X but came home with X. What was it? No, you came up with Y. Well, no, I thought X and Y a bit too confusing. No, but X and X is you went out for the thing and you bought the thing. Oh, okay. You went out for the, uh, and you came home with... Uh-huh.

Samantha said, I went to pick up my medication and came home with a puppy. I've done that twice. Hey, the number of people who have said, I went for whatever, but came home with a pet. Yeah. Someone said I went for bird seed and I came home with a guinea pig. Like, I get it. It's at the pet shop, but the guinea pig is a new addition to the. the family. A pet shops, like, in shopping centre still a thing? I don't reckon they are.

I didn't think they were. It must be like a pet barn or a pet quarters. You want to go to like the big ones. Exactly. Michael said went to Costco when it first opened. What a place. Went to look. Got a few specific items. Came back with $700 later worth of merch. That's a lot of stuff. You know what? That could have been one coffin though. You know how Costco sell coffins? I've never been to Costco. Oh my God. It is. It's a bit much. It's a bit on. It's just so overwhelming. It's just, yeah, like you don't know where to look. It's like IKEA. You better know you're going in for a purpose, because otherwise, you'll walk out with $700 worth of stuff. Going into IKEA, just not a fan. It's a maze. It's a maze. Yeah, and then I get

confused with the little rooms and the houses. Fair enough. It's like, do I see myself in this sort bedroom? Yeah, could I be in this little, little racing car bed? I could, I guess. Do I just buy this whole thing as is? Yeah. This is my personality now. Where are the meatballs? I'm bored. One dollar meatballs. They haven't been hit with the inflation. Not yet. That might be what you're covering in tomorrow's RBA update. Could be. Look forward to Put me down for that one, Shagga, 8-10. RBA, inflation. What do we know about it? Not a lot.

Not a lot. Anything else we need to cover off? All you guys are all good? I reckon that feels fantastic. Feels good to me too. Wrap that up in a bow. Feel strong, baby. Put it in the post.

We're out of here. We'll see you tomorrow. Bye-bye. Bye. Read that on the bottom of it. It's like, don't put this up your butt. I was like, oh, okay, well, we're not finding something else. Jess and Ducko.

That was the Jess and Ducko podcast. The new Maccrispia has arrived at Maccas. Try it today. Leroy.