Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Introducing to you Pablo 1, Pablo 2, Pablo 3, Pablo 4 and Gary

Episode Date: July 18, 2025

Ducko's wife Morgan freaks out at an open home, Jess gets ditched from a lunch date and Producer Shy Guy wrap up the week that was in his diary!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Delicious Maccas breakfast is available till 10.30 a.m. Frecky comes first. Jess and Dougo. This is the Jess and Dougo podcast. Welcome to the podcast. Time to say goodbye. How fitting. Oh yeah.

We are off on three weeks professional development as of now. Three sounds nice, doesn't it? Doesn't it? And we must say on behalf of well at least Shagai and myself. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah, you actually did this because of now. Three sounds nice doesn't it? Doesn't it? And we must say on behalf of well at least Shy Guy and myself, thank you. Yeah, you actually did this because of me. You squirreled us that third week from your Mat leave and said, I want to put it out there so everyone knows who a good guy you are. Thank you.

Taco said, I'd like to split my paternity leave. I'd like to take a little bit of family time in August, but I'm only doing it if Jess and Shy Guy get looked after as well." And Boss Jace went, Darran. That Babs has to stay. That was the compromise. Oh, she was never in there. I had Jess and Shy Guy wrench my contract. That was the compromise. It was us traded for Babs and that was- I said, I'd only take it if the team got to take it as well. I'm not just going to go solo on it.

I don't think I could do a weekend away and just be like, See ya fuckers. Just not, just wouldn't like it. And to make myself look good as well, I did say, No you do you, babe. I'm happy to hold down the fort. I remember what it's like having a six month old. It's tough! You'll need a break. Do it! But you said, no, I will not. And we're also getting another one at the end of the year, guys. Hahaha!

That's because we leave nothing on the field. Yes! I mean, we leave nothing in the tank, we leave it all on the field. We leave it all on the field. Leave it all out there. People think this job is a joke. It's not, mate. That we don't work that hard.

We do. You don't understand. Content never sleeps, and nor do I. No! I've had friends- oh here it is, the crescendo. Just for time's sake,'m going to keep it going. Oh please do. Seamless.

But we leave nothing in the tank. That's what only stands to reason. We need to develop professionally every so often. You'll be developing professionally in... New Zealand. I'm excited, I'm going to Queenstown. I was about to say Queenstown but you're also popping up to see the tree in Wanaka. Yes, and I'm going to Twizel as well, also up near Wanaka. Is that where your cousins are?

No, they're in Wanaka. Oh, they're in Wanaka. They live in Wanaka, they just bought a fucking house in Wanaka. It's a beautiful place. It's meant to be nice, rich as well. Are you gonna go see the tree? Have they told you about the tree? No one's told me about the tree. Oh, there's like a lake Wanaka?

Oh yes, yep. And there is a tree? It's quite a bit, I mean, I went around the similar time as you, so there's no leaves on the tree. Maybe it grows some trees in, grows some leaves in the spring. It's a naked tree. It's a naked tree, but just in like the middle of the lake.

I think it's some sort of freak of nature. It's completely submerged up to about halfway up its trunk. And it's just the most stark, beautiful site, Lake Wanaka tree. I'll pretend it was in one of the rooms. You're grimacing, Shy Guy, is it not a thing? It's just a tree and water. Show me, show me, show me.

I thought it was quite beautiful, pardon me for seeing the beauty in nature. It's pretty, sure, but. Oh, that's nice. Isn't that awesome? In winter though, it'd be a bit different, but chilling. It's a bit stark, isn't it? I'm excited though, and we got Flo in her little snowsuit.

Oh my god! Oh, she looks so cute. What's a bit of an age for tobogganing? She probably needs it. I'm genuinely pondering just going for aogganing? I don't know, I'll take it. She probably needs it. I'm genuinely pondering just going for a ski and having her on my back and just hoping for the best. I haven't skied in years.

Do one run. Yeah, just check it out. Just get your sea legs back, so to speak, your snow legs. I was talking to a mate and they're like, can't you and Morgan just go skiing and put her in kids club? I was like, well she can't hold up her neck. We're going to kids club? I don't know how kids club's gonna go.

I don't know how to- Well, to learn how to ski herself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know how tater tots is gonna go. I mean how to ski yourself. Yeah, yeah, I don't know how Tater Tots is gonna go. I mean, I love spoken like a person who does not have children. Yeah, I know a hundred percent. Yeah.

When are you going to Italy tomorrow? Tomorrow. How are you getting to the airport? You driving? Angus will drive. Leaving the car there. We're gonna leave the car there. And it's funny when my mum was questioning me the same way.

God, you and my mum are in sync. She said the exact same thing. Hey, get into the airport. I said, we'll leave the car. They went for three weeks. Yeah, it's expensive. Ma, the exact same thing. Hey, get into the airport. I said, we'll leave the car. They went, well, for three weeks. Yeah, that's expensive. Ma, I appreciate that. But when we land to come back, we don't want to muck around.

We get the train. We're not doing trains. No, that's Babs territory. I've got the lowest expectations. Joking Babs, sorry. No, the jokes are new. I'm not going anywhere. Hey, hey.

Babs could have picked you up. To be fair. She could have come. She could have come. She could have come. But she took it as a joke. But I reckon if you two went away and you leave three eggs, no disrespect, you'd come back less rested from each other.

And the vibes probably wouldn't be that hot. I feel like I'd be rested because she would take all the parenting loans. I'd get to do the cute shit and take Lucia to like, oh, we'll take a picture in front of the Dwar more, but then she'd have to do the hard stuff. So I would have had a great time. No wonder you didn't want to come. Batters would come back and be like, I'm too exhausted. I need to resign.

I need to check myself into some sort of facility. Yes, but no, we head off tomorrow straight to Milan. That's exciting. Oh Milan. Milan. No, neither. So I'm really excited. It's going to be. Good luck with the plane too. I really, I can't wait to see how that goes. I don't think we've packed enough for the plane. Like I've got a Lego set, I've got a poppet,

and I've got like some books and coloring and some stickers, but it's a 24 hour flight. Like you obviously are going business, which is good, but how do you feel the other business characters, the other business flyer passengers are gonna be when they get in there and see Lucia? And they're like, mother fucker. The only thing I can compare it to is,

I know this sounds so bad, last time we flew business, there was behind us a couple with three small children. No doubt, three. How well are they doing? I almost want to be like, what do you guys do? How many points did you get? Because the boys would have, three boys as well, they all had matching PJs. They looked like such a picture of whatever.

Wealth. Wealth, but a picture of rich, but the three boys had matching PJs. They looked like such a picture of whatever. Wealth. Wealth, but the picture of rich, but the three boys had their own seats. Like they would have been maybe eight, six and four. That's five. So they may, and to be honest, they were fine. Eight, six and four though. Bit older than 18 months, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah. Da da da da. I just really. My only saving grace is in business class as a bar. So hopefully all the other passengers are blind. Yeah, yeah. Da da da da. I just really. My only saving grace is in business class as a bar. So hopefully all the other passengers are blind. Yeah, yeah. And. Do you have to stand up, is the bar you stand up at?

Mm-hmm. Oh my God. I just, I've one day I'll get to the front of the plane. There's bench seating in the bar that has seat belts. So if you need to, I guess turbulence hits us. I quickly take a seat. I'd be just as excited to fly than I would be to go to Italy.

You know what I mean? Like I'd be just as excited to fly. That's why, like I know it's gonna be challenging, but I will not complain. I'd be just as excited to fly than I would be to go to Italy. You know what I mean? Like I'd be just as excited for the flight. That's why like I know it's going to be challenging, but I will not complain. I can't complain. I know it's going to be challenging, but I'm not. We looked at- I get Bloody Mary's endless Bloody Mary. To New Zealand, we looked at going business with the flight just because it's not that expensive. Yes. But it was still like an extra 1400 bucks. And we're like, it's a three hour flight and it's a business class flight. They don't have anything that good. So we're like, no, we're just going to sit in economy and just cop it.

And I know it does sound weird, but it's like the longer the flight is obviously worth more because hopefully she will sleep. But on this one, they don't have the, when you have babies, they have the bassinet seats at the front. She said they don't have that on this to New Zealand. That is weird. So we just have to seat belt her to ourselves and she's just basically going to hang off Morgan's tit.

Yeah. How are her nipples going? I haven't checked in in a while. Her nipples are fine actually. That's amazing. I know. This kid of yours, you fit the absolute jackpot sleeping relative to touch. And no nipple. She feeds well, sleeps well and she's good. That's because Morgan's nipples are so well trained. We both breastfeed at the same time.

So it's like the nipples aren't even confused now. They just get it. We both get it. Her supplies are unbelievable. She's got a plethora. I thought you were looking a bit more swole. Yeah, I'm trying to, you know, I'll do anything to put size on. I'll do anything.

That creatine you've been having in the morning, that's just powered in breast milk isn't it? Gotta do something. It's going to be weird when we're on the flight and we're both hanging off them and the people walking past like, what the fuck? Yeah, you're worried about how my business class passengers are going to react when they see the kid. What about your people?

That feels like economy. It does. And someone will walk past and go, can I have some? Get a cup. Those little plastic cups. Yeah, but no, she's a sweet angel. Absolutely. Where you could.

Yeah. You're going to have such an adventure. You know what I say though? Cause people say, geez, you're some of Morgan's like friends who have kids like, oh geez, so jealous. Like Flo's been so well-behaved and sleeps well. I'm like, yeah, but we paid $32,000 for her. I'm a turn on investment we've yet to see.

She's genetically a perfect embryo. You fucking hope she's good. 100%. Have you seen these stories? I don't know. We wouldn't have covered it on the show. They're now going to use DNA from three people. Have you seen these stories? I don't know. We wouldn't have covered on the show. They're now going to use DNA from three people. What?

Have you seen these? No. I was just seeing headlines. Did you? I chose not to send it in our email. I thought it was too newsy. It's a bit newsy and a bit medical. I thought you might be very interested in that.

Yeah. To be honest, I'm not spying on it. It was in the UK. What do you mean? They're going to use, talk amongst yourselves. The reason they did it was to eradicate an incurable disease out of the genetic makeup. But who's the third person? So the couple. Who is the third person?

Great question. A couple and then what, your mate? Like me and Morgan do it and we're like, all right, well Babs, can you just give us your DNA? Like could you denote that Babs has superior genes and is it true? It's obviously true. Obviously, yeah, I've seen you kick a soccer ball.

An IVF technique called pronuclear transfer being used to combine the DNA of three people to reduce the risk of mitochondrial disease. But that means you'd have a child that's yours and someone else's. Who is the third person? Yeah, you have to use a family member because otherwise that's fucking weird.

But then isn't weird to technically your mom is not just the grandmother, she's also part mother? Well, you know, my sister said if Morgan had any trouble carrying that she would carry a child. Your sister said that, I remember. Yeah, when you put the embryo in her. Which is the most beautiful act of generosity. How did you feel about that though? Was it a bit too much of a wig out?

Or was it like no, that would be... We were hoping it didn't ever need to get there. Who would you rather, Abby or me? Carry the child? Well I'm going to do a show with you and then you'd take time off, so probably Abby. But me, you would see what I was putting in my body. Be able to be a bit more involved in the don't do that. If you were carrying, I'll be at your house every day.

Just like fanning you. Don't hate me. I'll nominate. I'll put my hand up if you need it. I'll do it. So they're basically, it's still like the mom and the dad for the, in this example, but they're just taking from the donor the healthy mito. Oh, so it's an anonymous donor.

Well, they're just taking the portion out that they need for the embryos and then the bella. So it's not a make up of three people? It's still the two people. Mate, that's fraught with danger though considering they've had a few embryo mix-ups already. That's what makes me think of it in the IVF. Yeah, I don't know, I don't like that. I wonder where that case is at because there was going to be like a full investigation.

Did you see there was another one? Yes, yes, the same company. The same company but different city. I think I believe one was Melbourne and one was Brisbane. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why? I know, I know. Honestly, like that's, that's a nightmare fuel stuff. The next time we get our next embryo transfer, whenever that time comes to have our next baby, whenever that is, I'm even sure. I will be like, can you triple check this is the right fricking one? 100%. Yeah, yeah, because they've been sitting on ice for so long, I actually just got my sperm, I'm due to pay rent on that. In the facility, the storage facility.

The landlord's come for you. How much is the rent? Let me find it and I will tell you. So this is the sperm that is sitting in the, ooh, let's play a game. So it's, is this quarterly? Oh, they believe it's, okay, so this is the sperm that is sitting in there. Ooh, let's play a game. So it's, is this quarterly? I don't believe it's, okay, so this is quarterly. Quarterly, how much do you think my sperm pays for it?

Quarterly? To keep your sperm on ice, you're paying $330. You're very close. Ooh! 270. Oh, you're fucking on the money, yeah, 275. Wow! 275 a quarter for my sperm. And the thing is, I don't even know if I

need it anymore because we've got five embryos. So we're not going to the sperm. That's like back up, back up. We're going to the embryos, but it's if the five embryos fail that we need to start again. And part of my ignorance, you can't put it in your freezer. But what is it doing in that freezer? You need some cryo freezer or something, some deep thing. I don't know. Right. I mean, how different is a freezer? I know. I know. This is me not understanding medicine at all. Because now we're paying rent on the embryos, which are more expensive, and then the rent on my sperm.

Are they at the same facility? Different. One's in Sydney, one's in Newcastle. Yeah. My DNA is all around this bloody country. You fly to Melbourne? My embryo's been there too, Babs. Does this stuff just go all over your head? A little bit. I thought you meant physically and I was like why you putting sperm on my head?

Is that making your hair grow? Babs has got some of my sperm in her freezer too but I just told her keep that, hold that I might need it. Just to do a test. I'm on sperm everywhere. It's just another one of my jobs. Print trivia and hide sperm. And then go pick up Jess's drive-away. Which I had to fucking do myself but I actually had to angus it yesterday. print trivia and hide sperm and then go pick up Jess's driveway

which I had to fucking do myself but I actually know Angus did it yesterday you can walk a dog you could please I'd actually prefer you take him to the park could you do that? probably oh now you've got a big car he'd fit in he wouldn't have fit in the beetle

he'd actually fit in the Kona if you'd like to quit the record store I I will supplement your income. Yeah, come on. You could be a... Nah, you won't need to do the record with these new things we've got you. Yeah, yeah. Careful, we have a few records. There's a few records I want before you leave the store, so let's discuss. Before you do full-time dog walking for me, get done with some records.

But all being well, you'll be in here for a few days, but you get to work from home, yeah? You'll have some time. Yeah, I'm actually going to stay with my parents for a couple days. You're going to head to the farm. Back to your roots. That'd be good. What are you going to work from home. Yeah, you'll have some time. Yeah, I'm actually going to stay with my parents Good what are you gonna do with them? They're doing those things where the first meal will be nice You'll wake up. You're like what the fuck do I do today? Pretty much I said to mom because she wants me to go there now that Jethro's gone Yeah, you know have some time time. I said you're all going to work during the day

So what am I gonna do? She's like work from home read a book and then we'll be home and make your dinner I said, okay, sure. Do your parents work? I mean, I don't know why they wouldn't. Yes, they do. But Damo, he's in aircons. Oh, that's right. Hot sausage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, then mum's working at schools now.

It's like in learning support and stuff. Oh, I was in learning support. So yeah. So Shigah. So I'll just be at home, just hanging out. Okay. You know how we usually do, what's Shaggy doing right now? What's Babs doing right now?

Yeah, might catch up with some friends. Actually that could be funny. We'll do a quick center pick of what you're doing right now. Yeah. Ski fields, I'll be having an anti-pasta platter. Babs just looking at promos and going, what the fuck does this do? Babs, you got to come back with, you know, I want what 15 trends that we can jump on video wise. Yeah, a couple of vids. Maybe a, uh.

We never do that one, we got to do our sexy stare, but sort of misted it. And I also, I promised a rice cooker, they want to know what we all do after nine each day. So we'll do that when we return. Oh, it'd be that interesting. No, I was going to say I go home and lay down for a bit. That's what other people want to know. Actually, make sure you do yours crying. Go home and just like cry. It's not what happens. Make sure we film it on a Tuesday because it is what happens. You're going to get really fit in these holidays.

Sure. Yeah. You can go to the gym all the time. You know, you went for a run the other day. I know, but I had pizza for breakfast. So that was just to work out. Yeah. But what happens on Contiki stays on Contiki.

Now you finish Contiki. Yeah. Now I can lock in. Where's he now? Have you spoken to him this morning? Is he drunk? He's in Bordeaux. Was he drunk? He's at a festival actually. What festival? I don't know just a random one. A wine festival? What happens in Bordeaux? No it's like a music festival but apparently there's just random ones that pop up and they're like free. Europe man! Rock on! Just festivals galore.

What a place! I know, jealous! Is he um... Pingers. Is he on... Pingers. No. Okay. Why did you need that clarified? I don't know. I had that, did you hit me arse and all? It's there. It's there whenever I need it. So is this... Shitfiddler. Shitfiddler's on the ground. Oh he's definitely not doing that. Yeah, nah, well I don't know. Well he's in, he's in Oosh, not in plumbing. Anyway, time for us to get out of here. I know, hey, hey, we're eating into our professional development time. Oh yeah, I'm gonna put time shit in. Absolutely.

Have a great time, I'll see you in a few weeks. Bye. Take it up, turn it up, turn it up. Justin Ducko in the morning. Hey, welcome to Friday. Welcome. Indeed. I reckon you're going to pick up on something today, team. Shagaz chose a BDE today.

Sure I got it. Cause he already has, I guess, anatomical BD. Yeah, we have. But today, we're going to add- Autonomy wise, BD is huge. Autonomy wise, but I don't think that's reflected in his energy every other day of the week. Today the energy. However, today, not only is it the final destination on Babs' Contiki Tour, Oh, God, I've had a fun on that.

It's the last time for Shy Guy to really lure Pablo to him. Oh, yeah. But also, we're heading on three weeks professional development after today's show. Oh that's right, yeah I forgot about that. So there might be a different vibe emanating through your speakers. I forgot about that. So did I, I've been obsessed with just our last destination for Contique. Yeah yeah yeah but this is our last show for a couple weeks so let's let it all hang out team. I think we should leave nothing, what's the saying in sport? No stone unturned. Nothing left on the field? Yeah leave it all out there. Leave it all out there.

Yep. Are you going to leave it all out there, Shy Guy? Sure. Oh no, come on. I want to see you push. You're going to leave it all out there. I'm tired. Oh, gee.

6-0-1. We need a break. That's what we're having for our last show. So leave it all out here. That's what you've got to do. Okay. We're in the last quarter of the game. The coaches have given you the ball.

You're going to say, I'm tired? You need to rally. You're going to say, I'm tired? We're talking about practice. quarter of the game the coaches giving you the ball you say I'm tired You say I'm tired. We talk about practice the game Three hour game. Yeah doll if the game just started and this is what you're bringing It'll get high. I'm talking about you BDE Take that all back. Maybe I think we might Babs you're locked in today? I'm locked in. Yes, queen.

Yeah, come on. Yes. Leave it all out there today, Babs. I know you don't get the full three weeks, but you get some time. Yeah, one week. We'll. Few work from home days in there,

and you don't need to see us every day, which I think you'll benefit from. If it's anything, it's a break from us. A Babs would happily come into work every day if you and I didn't show up. Yeah. That's not true. Nah, I know.

God, that's nice. We all need a break from each other as much as we love each other. It's just a great time to have a break. I don't know what you're talking about. I mean, no, we don't. I mean, no, we don't. I mean, no, we don't. I don't need a break from you guys.

Not me, but- I pay to be here. I don't know what- Actually, it's just Shige who wants a break. He's going skink. I've got a bit on at the moment, okay? Oh, the house. Are we allowed to- Yeah, we can talk about that. Oh, okay. I have to leave my beautiful home got a bit on at the moment. Okay. Oh, the house. Are we allowed to?

Yeah, we can talk about that. Oh, okay. Let's leave. Leave your shit at the door though. Like once you come in here. I don't want to hear. Oh, I've got so much going on. Yeah.

We have the privilege, the honor of talking into this big stick. You leave your crap at the door. Yeah, but then we talk about our crap on air sometimes. Let's talk about it now. Only if we can make fun of the crap. You can make fun of it. Yeah, let's put this back out. So Shaga's been told by his renter, he's been told by his real estate agent of this

townhouse that he loves so much. That he's a bad tenant and he needs to leave within four weeks? It's eight. Eight, yeah. And you're now trying to sue him, et cetera, et cetera. No, that's not happening. I'm working out how to get money back because I've paid in advance. Yeah, because you pay've paid in advance.

If you work in civil law, we'd love to engage your services. Anyway, it's the whole thing. I've got some real estate mates. Do you want me to reach out to them about where Shire Guy can find a home? Oh, Dukkow will do some SponCon for you. That's very nice of you. Hi, I'm Dukkow and this is Shire Guy's home. I'll use the code Dukkow10. Have you got a friend like Shire Guy who doesn't have a place to live?

Well, you should engage. Do you have BDE but you're lacking in BDE today? Do you have BD but no E? Well, here's the real estate agency for you. Has there been an update or something? Is that why you're more grouchy today? No update. That's a great word for him. We should get him a bin to broadcast from like Oscar the Grouch. Actually, we can put the recycling bin on his head. Love that idea. Oh nah, that's a pretty dirty bin. If anything's gonna spark him up, let's put a bin on his head.

Nah, we'll be fine guys. We'll be fine. Oh, with pleasure. Do your dance to him. Do your nudie dance. Woohoo! That's not necessary. It's a bit more butt focused, so let me just turn around. Okay. Thanks. Yeah! She's bumping and grinding on him.

Does that turn you on? Sure, we're sparked up now guys. Yes! Oh look at him! Because we've got a big show team. We're giving away our last gift. Okay, you have to dance on Babs next. I think she would go to HR straight away.

You wouldn't hear me ever again. Through that. You know what? Good call, ducko. That'd be the end of me. Don't do that. No, no, no. What have we got?

We've got Keith Urban tickets. Keith Urban tickets. Our last Keith Urban tickets. Double pass plus that accommodation. Yep. Got to get involved in the show today. Yeah, you do. Anytime. We've got a few opportunities. the show today. Yeah, you do anytime.

We've got a few opportunities. We've got, oh, Friday Bangers, go and vote. Oh, yeah, you and I have obviously just really missed the mark. We're down, are we? Yeah. Down. God damn it. I think all the young people voted this week.

Yeah, all the Avril lovers. All the Avril lovers, which- It's not my favourite Avril song, but I like Avril Lavigne, so I'm happy with what's getting out. I remember, I reckon the first iteration of this game, you batted up Skater Boy. Skater Boy. And everyone was like shook. It didn't win either. And I don't think it got up.

No, but this one, that was back when we had people call in to do it. Oh, that's true. There was only one selector, wasn't there? Yeah. Oh God, this. And also, I think the listeners know Babs needs a win, so I'm not mad about it. You're absolutely right. I wonder if people are getting really good at picking who's picked what. Oh, surely. I wonder maybe people play that game for themselves being like,

Hmm, can I decipher who played? Who picked what? I still scratch the record every time on the Insta stories. It's fun, isn't it? It is fun. I forget that that's a feature. I show people all the time. I'm looking at this cool feature.

That's fun. Who taught you that? Um, I think I accidentally saw it one day and I showed Shaggy, I was like, do you know how you can do this? He's like, yes, I did know that. He's reading the iOS updates every time they drop in you. I cut to Shaggy's like, I'm going through a lot. I was like, all right, I just want to talk about some Instagram features.

Yeah. So the first time we did Bangers, you did Skater Boy, you did Blue Zone by Jackie and I did Ricky Martin, which did win Ricky Martin. That's right. And it's before we knew Babs was allowed to play. Babs didn't have a vote. Because she needed to be impartial because she picked the caller. That's right that was in March last year. That's right. And then Babs didn't join the crew until... When did we let Babs in? June? Do you remember feeling left out of that Babs being the music aficionado? Yeah I did that's why I asked

if I could please play. Oh and then we had to rejig the whole thing to make it a bit fairer. Oh yeah, the bads came in October. Wow! That was a good few months after we started. Jeez, we really just let you watch from the outside. Left you out in the cold. Well hey, welcome to the big leagues, kid. Thank you so much. It's an honour to be here.

We've proven your place, because yes, you are. You do reign superior. We've also got Alpha Max today at 10k. Jump on the phones. But next, I would love for someone to call in on 13 1060 for No Dumb Thought Friday. I would love to give you Keith Urban tickets for giving us a brilliant dumb thought. We could play to push shoes or something. Oh my god. Come on.

That's hello. Have we got something? You could spend. That's your impromo, what have we got? Have you checked the price cupboard? I'll have a look. Babs has got something. 13 10 60. No such thing as a dumb thought.

We got no dumb thought Friday. You got one. Give us a call. We're in a mood. Jess and Ducco. Jess and Ducco. There's no such thing as a dumb thought. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Babs has just raided the prize cupboard. Oh yeah. Not only. You get your voice on the air, you're in with a chance of winning the co-fod. Get some tradie undies. Love tradie undies. They're so comfy. We love tradie undies. Did you bring any of that bamboo toilet paper in by the way? I was telling Morgan about that. Because we're going to have a slippery time if we...

Sorry, I was meant to, wasn't I? Because you wanted to try it. Do you know what? No. Angus took it all to his workplace. I see what he's doing. What is he doing? He's loving it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll bring- That's fair. I don't want to take another man's bamboo paper, you know. I'll just leave that. I'll get my own. Mate, there's 60 rolls. He can spare you a roll. I just want to be Slip Brothers. You can text- you both have squatty potty's. Yeah. You may be slipping and sliding with your bamboo toot paper. We both have animated smiles in photos. Ah, anyway, no such thing as a dumb thought. Give us a give. You like that one.

You do? Yeah, mouth open. You could put a peen in there. Jeez. Matt, save us. Good morning to you, Matt. Hello, Matt Matt. Good morning legends. How are we? Yeah good this is not your first dumb thought is it Matt? No definitely not. What was your first one? Yeah what was it? What was it again? I don't know I think I have ADHD so it's bad but I think we got lost in like a hippo versus something chat. Yeah, Rhino, you were winning a fight. Yes, Matt. Hippo all day. Hippo all day. You're a big hippo guy. What have you been thinking about in recent times? Have you ever looked at mashed potato and just thought it's Irish guacamole?

Hey, it could be. It is. It really is. And if tomatoes are a fruit, does that just mean tomato sauce is a smoothie? Oh my god. Matt has been working overtime. There you go. Tomatoes are fruit. Does that make tomato sauce? Technically it makes it a very sugary smoothie. Yes. That's weird. I'm dipping my chippies in a smoothie. But I love it nonetheless. Tomato smoothie makes it sound healthier. Oh my god. You're right. And if boosts come out with a tomato smoothie, you heard it here first. Well, you know what, Matt, my cocktail of choice, Bloody Mary.

You do like a Bloody Mary. So that is essentially. I'm not the biggest Bloody Mary fan. An alcoholic smoothie. You're having an alcoholic smoothie. It's an alcoholic smoothie. That's healthy. Every time I have guac now, I'm gonna say,

can I have, can you pass the Irish mash? Yeah. Yes. No. I tell you, I've been doing it all the time you pass the Irish mash? Yeah. Yes. No. I tell you, I've been doing it all the time. I had Irish mash and steak last night. It's Irish guacamole, Mexican mash. Sorry.

Mexican mash. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, geez, sorry. That's right, Matt was enjoying it. Me and Matt were on the same page. You were like, I think we're wrong here. Hey, thanks, Matt. Hey, Matt.

Do you want some Trady Undies? Do you want some Trady Undies? Oh, 100%. Send them my way. I'll send you back to Babs. You take those You should get your size Hahaha

I already know you're gonna be Egg Legends have a safe trip You'll be an extra medium It's not a trip, Matt It's professional development Professional development, yes Thank you, we're developing I too need some business development

Thank you Hahaha Hey, I've got one for you Oh, please I was thinking about this the other day when I was driving to work and it was misty and foggy Why have you said that so sensually?

Oh, no, it just kind of felt like it. I like it. Is fog just clouds on the ground? Think about it. I think it might be. Think about it. Is that what it is? I don't know what fog is. Are we just driving through clouds when it's foggy?

So next time it's foggy, let's not complain about it. 34 years I've been on planet Earth, never thought about what fog is. Yeah, look at how two producers furiously googling. No, I can tell you, foggy is considered a cloud. So fog is cloud on the ground? Yeah, you're driving through a cloud. Are we paying that for quick fingers? Yeah, we'll pay that.

Babs, you didn't get on. Yeah, but I had the scientific explanation. Oh, go for it. What did you get? Fog is a visible aerosol consisting of tiny water droplets or ice crystals suspended in the air near the earth's surface reducing visibility. Nerd. Yeah see but no what ducko asked is it a cloud? You can answer it.

Shy Guy answered it. It's actually a cloud that forms close to the ground. Which is nice. Give me your last story babs. It's one thing to google it's another to filter out. You're just filling time and time in a point. You're just saying things now. Don't try and bamboozle us with your fog knowledge.

So I guess that's really not a dumb thing at all. That's exactly what it is. You're not as dumb as you think you are. I was thinking about that for so long, I can't wait to tell the guys this. It's a cloud on the ground. That makes it feel really magical. To quote Benson Boone, mystical magical. It really does. Like it makes it... How are you singing about clouds? It makes it feel so much better driving through fog now. Yeah I like that a lot. It's very Super Mario. It is isn't it? You know, on the rainbow road going through a cloud. Look at you with Mario references. Thank you very much. David,

wrap us up here mate. You got a no dumb thought for us? I do. What have you got? Why do some letters of the alphabet look the same as the capital and the lower case? I like the letter I. The I's got the dot. Like the C. C looks the same. You're right, whereas in their grown up form some letters get a different one. E gets an evolution. Q gets an evolution.

Yeah, yeah, I see what you're saying. Whereas R doesn't. G gets an evolution. Yeah, yeah. I see what you're saying. Whereas R doesn't. G gets an evolution. N doesn't. K doesn't. No. Why do the some not grow up and others do? The one example Shaggy gave, wrong.

It's so mean. That's actually a David. I wasn't dancing at first, but now I'm really intrigued. David. That's a good one. Quick Google. Why is that? Who decided?

Sesame Street. Oh my god. Even David had to juggle that. Today's show brought to you by the University of New York. Why is that? Who decided? Sesame Street. Oh my god. Today's show brought to you by the letter P. That's a good one isn't it? David. L? Like L gets a little fancy little thing at the bottom of it.

L. You know what I mean? Again, the English language. Maybe some letters just haven't grown up yet. Maybe. They're like the Lost Boys. Yeah they're the letters that never grew up. Yeah. That was developed in 1700 BC. Awesome. To blame those people in the Middle East. That's right. I wonder why they decided. You can have a glow up. Nah you'll stay the same. You can have a glow up. Nah I don't really get anything. It's just complex writing systems, my Google says.

Hey David, would you like some tradie undies as well? Absolutely. Alright, we'll send you back to Babs. She'll ask for your size. She'll ask for your size. Don't take it personally. It's all above board. It's appropriate, because obviously.

I'm a small as well, David. It's fine. Jess and Ducco. Bowling. Who likes bowling in this team? You like Timp and Bow. You use the slide though. That's what I want to put out there.

How I bowl does not affect how you bowl. Let me put the gutters up. Yes, you there in the bird t-shirt. Yes. Let me put the gutters up and let me use the slide and I'll have a great time. But people judge you as an adult when you want the gutters up. Yeah. And the slide.

I think the slide's the worst of the two. Helps me aim. The slide, the gutters, it makes it muchters up. Yeah. And the slide. I think the slide's the worst of the two. The slide helps me aim. The slide, the gutters, it makes it much more fun. Yeah. Because when you are not great at sport and it just keeps going in the gutter. Yeah. Sorry, not the, what am I saying? The guard rails. You know what I'm talking about?

Yeah. Bumpers? What's the technical term? Yeah, I think they're called bumpers. Bumpers. Yeah. Cause if it keeps going in the gutter, no fun. See, I could see Shaggo being sneaky, good at bowling.

I'm not great, but I don't need bumpers or a ramp. Yeah, yeah, no, most people don't. Take the judgement out of your voice. We should go for a team bowl. I would love that. No bumpers allowed. Because it's something that no one's good at. It's one of those things that like, I'm not good at bowling.

But you're right. I reckon Shaga probably would rock up with his own ball. Yeah, and shoes, obviously. Shaga's would put, Shaga would rock up with his own ball. Oh, and shoes obviously. Shaga's so, like so close to the pins, you know? Absolute, and his long leave is, he could just get there. Oh yeah. My uncle Fernando, he was in a bowling league. Fernando sounds like a bowler.

Bro, it's in my DNA. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fernando could spin that ball. He was a bowler and a darts guy. Darts is always fun. Darts is also tricky. Babs, do you like a bowl? Yeah, I don't mind a bowl. We'll go 10 pin bowling. How's this though? He was a bowler and a darts guy. Darts is always fun. Darts is also tricky.

Babs, do you like a bowl? Yeah, I don't mind a bowl. Oh, we're going to team pin bowling. Okay, after professional development. Yeah, team bowl. Team bowl. Do you want to do this bowl that they're doing in Pittsburgh? It's called Balls Out Bowling and it's nude bowling. I love the sound of it.

Yeah. Shark, I'll be tripping over himself. He will be the ramp. He's got his own ramp. You can be my slide. I don't think you're my services, Jess, but you know, just won't work. I'm trying to, I'm trying to get a strike. Sorry. Yeah. You also go to the gutter with mine. I can't get any purchase on yours. You know, the balls got nowhere to slip off. Where does it go? Where is it exactly? I go to, I go to position

the ball, just drop straight onto your foot, you'll just be injured. Hurts me toe. So it's called Balls Out Bowling, this is happening in America right now. Of course it's in America. Yeah, you've got to be 18 years old to enter obviously. And how's this? You don't need to be a good bowler. In fact, you don't even have to bowl. If you pay your $30 for a ticket, which includes four hours of unlimited bowling and shoe rental, you're good to go. Thank you. So the balls are out but we still need to protect our Tootsons and have those clown

shoes on. How funny would that be? Everyone's naked in the clown shoes. Now you've said balls out bowling, ladies invited. Ladies are invited. I'd imagine there's like... Balls out, boobs out. If we were thinking this would be a fun thing to do when you're a nudist, you rock up.

I reckon it'd be a lot of dudes, a lot of saggy old dudes there with the bowling balls like waiting for the one female. You're absolutely right. Because if we are going to be stereotypical, if we are going to put people in a box, the kind of person that bowling does attract, it's a certain physique, wouldn't you say? You don't need to have an eight pack to be a champion bowler. No, I do not think so. Long leavers and a bit of sag, you'd be right.

And a bit of sag and you'd be right. And a bit of sag. And a great little wind up. If anything though, I think guys are more disadvantaged going nude because there would be bits in the way. Things slapping around. Yeah, and doing that bend to get the ball down the thing. You're absolutely right because if, again, if I'm picturing- It is compromising.

It is compromising. If I'm picturing the bowling position, you know, sometimes you're almost getting onto one knee. Yes, you are. Everyone's looking at your butt. Elegantly. Everyone's right down the crack. There'd be a lot of crack on display. Yeah, you're right. Yes, you are. Oh, it's elegantly. Everyone's looking at your butt. Everyone's, everyone's right down the crack. Yeah. There'd be a lot of crack on display.

Yeah, you're right. It's not even the front because everyone's behind you. But is that the advantage of a balls out bowling? You can really knock off your competitors by flashing them, you know, the moon. Oh, got you. That is throwing me off my game. Yeah, leaving some. Shia Guy's in front of me and I just get,

Ugh, I've slipped. Chocolate starfish. Shia Guy keeps slipping on the side rails. Yeah, that's throwing me off too, knowing that you're looking at get chocolate starfish. Shaga keeps slipping on the side rails. Yeah, that's very me off too, knowing that you're looking at my chocolate starfish. Hey, everyone's staring at Shaga's mud button. That's right. How's this? No tickets will be sold at the door though.

Online purchase only. Thank you for clarifying. Sexual activity is not permitted, so lay off. Nothing turns me on more like a bowling alley. And finally, no photos or videos are allowed. It's just the good times we have together in the alley. Oh I love that. You have to hang in your phone. A little bit of decorum thank you. This is their ad we're gonna have music blasting, drinks flowing and prizes to be won. Amazing, tradie undies for everyone. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10k alpha bucks on Hit Alpha Bugs.

30 seconds to answer 10 questions all started with the same letter. Have to take your first answer. You cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, say pass. We'll come back if there's time. We are playing for $10,000 our player today. Well, look at this. It's another one of you. Hello. Jess, say hello to Jess.

Jess. Hello, great hello to Jess. Jess. Hello, great name Jess. Great name. Do you get weird when people call you Jessica? Nah, nah. Look, I say call me anything except late for dinner. There she is. Oh, I like that.

So I get weird. Only my mother is allowed to call me Jessica. Otherwise, you've called me a couple of times and I know I'm in trouble. Jessica. You know? Jess, good morning to you. Thanks for being with us. This is only the second last time You've called me a couple of times and I know I'm in trouble. Jessica. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jess, good morning to you.

Thanks for being with us. This is only the second last time before we go off on professional development. So if we can give you the 10 grand, I think it'd be a great day, Jess. Oh, it would be an amazing day. What do you want to do with the cash order? I'm 31 and I need a hip replacement, so I'm getting my... Oh, no. Is that an injury, Jess, or just an issue you've been dealing with for far too long?

Just bad genes. I've bled my mom like that. That is horribly unlucky. That is! Hip replacement, that's horrific! And what does that mean Jess? Is that some sort of titanium situation? Yeah, and they're actually going to cut off my femur bone and then grasp my femur bone into my fit and then put the fake hip in. It's gonna be a good starting. It's a big recovery.

Oh my goodness. Well if we can get you 10 grand to either cover some costs of the surgery or just spark a little joy for Jess, you're gonna need a hell of a Netflix subscription. When do you have to do this Jess? In October. Oh my god, okay. We need something for Jess. We need something for Jess. We need something for Jess.

Let's get you the 10 grand. Absolutely. First and foremost and then we'll talk. Jess the letter you're gonna work with today babe. God it would have been great if it was H. H for hip. We're one off it's G. Alright. G for go Jess go. Go Jess. Good one. Good one. Your time will start after the first question babe here we go. Starting with the letter G. Good one. Your time will start after the first question, babe. Here we go. Starting with the letter G, we need to name something you find in the shed. Pass.

A school subject. Geography. A musical. Glee. A fruit. Pass. A board game. Pass. A verb. Pass. A board game. Um... Pass.

A verb? Pass. A sport? Golf. Something scary? A joke. An actress? Pass.

A chocolate bar? Pass. Something you find in the shed? Oh no! Damn it! No. We ran out of time. We got ourselves four. Four of the best. Oh no! Damn it! No! We ran out of time. We got ourselves four. Four of the best.

Four of the greatest. Some of you find it a shit. That's a tough one. I was trying to think of that too. It's like gate? Great? Gears? The garden hose or some gloves perhaps? Yeah, that's a left of centre one. A fruit could have been grapes, a board game, guess who? A verb, grab, an actress, Gal Gadot, Gwyneth Paltrow and then a chocolate bar. You don't think of the galaxy or the golden rough? No. Or Shy Guy's faves? Absolutely, he's a big rough man. Huge golden rough guy.

Jess, we're so sorry, that feels bad. That feels... Look, let's give her a three month coffee subscription thanks to the absolute legends and weapons at Lords. You get the Lord's Supply of Coffee Jess. Awesome, thank you. Thank you Jess, good luck. We'll be thinking of you. Yeah, yeah, that's it. You'll get there, you know. Keep us updated, call the show in later this year. Yeah Babs, can you make sure you save Jess's deets please? Yeah.

Thanks Jess. Thank you Jess. Jess is like, I didn't win, let me go. Let me leave. We're like, ah we't win, let me go. Let me go. Let me leave. We're like, ah we feel so sorry for you. I know. Anyway. Hip replacement at 31.

Oh mate, that's, yeah. God, I like what you said though, bad genes. Bad genes. I blame mum and dad. Jess and Ducco. Now if you've joined us early every day this week, you would have been part of the Contiki. Absolutely. I mean everyone needs to Contiki at once in their youth.

Wouldn't you say Ducco? We all gotta contique together. Travel is how we broaden our minds. We get out of our own little bubbles and go, there's a much bigger world out there. Didn't broaden my mind on contiquing that one. I damaged it. Can you remember any of your contiquing?

Killed some brain cells on that contiquing. But yes, Babs, sweet Babs, producer Hot Sausage. She was abandoned by her boyfriend. He went, you know what, sweetheart? I know you wanna go to Europe, but I'm gonna go with me, mate. Catch your big wheels. So lucky she's Lucky she's got Jess. She's got Ducco. Yeah, she's got Shy Lord She's got Shy Lord and every day this week we've taken. And Pablo who's been over there for us

Investigating on Jethro to make sure he ain't out there cheating. Unfortunately Pablo kind of fell off the rails I'm gonna say day one in Paris, France Where he started trying to seduce Jethro himself, which was an interesting pivot from your mate Pablo. But every, every destination he's had a cousin to introduce us to. Fablo Gablo, Mario Pablo, my favorite yesterday in Amsterdam, Clogolo. Clogolo is great. He was a leash.

But today we are off to El Espanola. The final destination on our Kentucky. We are here in Barcelona. Barcelona. Espanol, possibly Pablo's home nation. Well it might be, yeah. I'm checking with him today. There's an asterisk over his passport.

We just don't know where he originates from. No. But we are here in Barcelona, which you could tell by Shaggy. Shaggy. Oh yeah, we got... See the budget cuts have hit us Babs. But we are here in Barcelona, which you could tell by... Shaggy. Shaggy? Oh yeah, we got... See, the budget cuts have hit us, Babs. We were dressed up the first couple of days and now today...

With four course feats. And soccer ball. And Shaggy got us all a soccer ball. In the colour. I only got two because they only had two. Oh! We didn't even get one each! Colours of the country.

Colours of Spain. And you play soccer. I do. I was kicking the ball around yesterday in here. Oh my god, are we going to talk about who we met yesterday? We will, a bit later. We met one of your teammates. But also... What?

Your captain actually. We met the captain of the eggs. She works in this very building. No she doesn't. Yeah, well we met her. She told us she was the captain. That's the... No, level below, like level four or...

Oh, that's the weirdest lie. She's like, you guys know bad. She's like, can you marry? You're related? What are you, a cousin? Are you married? You never know. But anyway, look at Loving Nation.

Hence it's our final destination, but what I've really enjoyed a lot is the culinary journey we've been on. Yes, what have we got to hate? We've obviously got a Spanish feast. Yeah. Jeez, budget cuts have hit the Jessaduck age. It's a big sausage.

It's a charitso! For producer sausage. Why is it shaped like that? Cause that's our charitso. Have a bite. Go on, have a bite life on air. It's very bendy, isn't it? It's a curvy boy. Hey, hey, that's how they do it in Spain.

Hang on a minute. Who's that coming in? Oh my god. Of course, as soon as the charizo comes out, here he comes. Oh, hello senorita Baberela. Ah ha, Pablo. Are you going to share your charizo with Pablo? Oh, look how bent it is. Very big. What do you think of the length?

It's got nothing on this shy guy. Now, today we are in Pablo home country. That's right. El Spaniola Az Azatampica. So you are Spanish, Pablo. No, well I have exciting for you. Yes. My cousins are here.

Oh. My cousins and brothers and sisters. Now you've done, okay. They're all here. Because everywhere else we've only had one. Yes. Whereas are you telling me we get to meet a lot of the family. Babi, my girl, hot sausage.

Introducing to you. Hot charitza. Hot charitza, that's a hot tampa. I have Pablo one. Babi, my girl, hot sausage. Introducing to you... Hot charitza! Hot charitza! I have Pablo one, Pablo two, Pablo three, Pablo four, and Gary. Say hello, boys. Hello. Hi. Hello, Babs.

Hello, Jess. Hi. Oh, they're all here. Oh my god, I'm actually getting a bit of a contact flash. Oh, well, true. Now, you guys got to behave today. Be good, okay? There's so much sexual energy in here, Babs. Now you guys are going to behave today. Be good, okay? SEND THE BASTARDS TO THE POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOPTA POOP I don't know if there's enough chorizo to go around, but... It's just that, yeah. Wait, you're dreaming of Pablo?

We like! Okay. Anyway, update. I've lost your boyfriend completely. I got caught up with my family eating paella. Paella! Paella! Big potatoes bravas family? Whatever she said, yes. You probably... I'm probably not getting the pronunciation right, my accident. You're Italian, Massa Pa... Of course, yes. I'm probably not getting the pronunciation right, my accent.

You're Italian, man. Of course. We go to football match, we have fun, and I forget I'm here to look after the Jethro, but I know I'm coming to you. But I thought, Babi, you see my whole family and you like my family. Yeah, they seem nice. Yes, except for Gary. Gary, we think Gary adopted.

Not sure about Gary. One of the great Spanish names. Gary, where are you from? Where are you from, Gary? Anyway, not sure about Gary. One of the great Spanish names. Gary where are you from? Where are you from Gary? Anyway, not important. Pablo one through four. That's so nice to have you here. Are you going to eat your sausage Babby because I'm very hungry. You don't need a fork and knife. Can I have just one little bite? I just want to touch the tip. Are you a bit of a nibbler Pablo? Pablo like to nibble from time to time. Nibble on what? That is the question. Present your elbow, Babs. I want to say, it has been an honour.

Pablo, don't! Oh, we like! Did we take another week but we got a good playing, Babs? It has been fun, you know, Babby, but Pablo must go now he must he has pulled through clean and wife to seduce. You might you might be questioning the budget cuts we've had to pay Pablo obviously for his PI services this whole week so please thank him. Thank you Pablo.

Even though we've got no data on your boyfriend. I tell you he's hot though. Pablo say goodbye. Hey, Pablo stop arguing. Say bye to him and daddy, daddy. Ciao. Bye. Hasta luego. Au revoir.

Sayonara. Ah, farewell. I was married Pablo, you too. You guys know I'm sort of the unofficial captain slash mayor of my street. You know that. Self appointed, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got Catherine Kim across the road who keep taking me to look at their garden. And they want to meet my daughter all the time. of the unofficial captain slash mayor of my street. You know that. Self appointed, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I've got Kath and Kim across the road who keep taking me to look at their garden and they want to meet my daughter all the time. Between you, Kath and Kim, that's a hell of a neighbourhood watch. Well, yeah, nothing, no stone goes unturned in our neighbourhood. Wasn't there works happening in your street

and no one had been letter dropped and the three of you staunched on it. Me and Kim staunched on it. I let her do a lot of the staunching. I regretted it as soon as I rocked up. So yesterday, the house across the road has gone for lease, like for rent. Okay. Right?

And there was all these cars parked in our street. Naturally, as you do, you're like, why are all these cars in our bloody street? Who's taking our spots? One of those relatable memes I saw this week, it's like when you don't have a garage or a driveway parking. So you're parking on the street, but someone parks in front of your house. Oh, it's the worst. You're like, that's mine! That's exactly what happened. Okay. There was all these cars and I what's going on then we realized it's a walk through of the rental. It's an inspection. Open home vibe.

Of cross the road. So Morgan and I parked the car, get flow out and I said should we just go over? Like because we just don't live in a day and age where we're popping over to our neighbors. We barely know their names. So let alone seeing inside your neighbors homes, I understand the lure. Yes and it's a house and I thought maybe Shy Guy who's looking for a new rental. I thought maybe- Let's do a legwork for the Shy Guy. I said to Morgan like, let's go check it out. Shy Guy needs a place where he's been kicked out of his rental.

It's a house, he might suit him. It's two bedroom. I don't want to recommend it until I've laid eyes on it myself. And also I just think it'd be really funny to live across the road from Shy Guy because I would just do some weird things to him. You know what I mean? Absolutely. Be spying on him.

I'd be in his backyard hanging up my washing. Absolutely. You'd be putting a poo in a paper bag and lighting it on fire, leaving it on his doorstep. Oh yeah, I saw this place on Real Estate. Did you? I thought, that's too close to dark. It'd be so funny. He'd be lighting it.

I'd recognise the street and I was like, oh yeah, nah. It was actually, you'd be proud. Morgan's like, we dark. It'd be so funny. I recognise the street. I was like, oh yeah, nah. It was actually, you'd be proud. Morgan's like, we should look at it for Shy Guy. Oh, that's really nice. It was actually her idea. I was like, oh, you're so right.

Who's Shy Guy? Yeah, we definitely should. So we got, let's take- It's after nine. I don't think about the team. So I was like, have you heard the rumours too, honey? You can't have the pipe and we've been across the road from you. Can't have the pipe and man in my street. I can't have the python man in my street.

So we take Flo and we go to do the inspection and Morgan starts freaking out and she's like, what if we, should we do this? I'm like, just leave it to me. Should we do it? As in like, what if this isn't allowed? I'm like, honey, it's an inspection. Like, oh, trust me, I've got a story. I'd argue 99% of people who go through open homes are not in the market.

They're all living on the street like yourself. They just want to have a look. It still feels naughty. Like it still feels like I'm just going through my, cause the neighbours were still, had their stuff in there. Cause they haven't moved out yet. The tenants, of course. So you weren't allowed to go in through the drawers

or touch anything, but you could just see how they live. I mean, you're not usually in an open home. No, but I mean, everyone does. Jess did a poo in one once. I need to make sure. I have the lid on it though. I need to make sure the plumbing can handle J-Fudge. It's a house we ended up buying, thank you very much.

I own this, that's how I mark my territory. That's how we won the auction. That's how you do it. Oh, she's done it again. Do it over, obviously. We roll in, we roll in, and the agent, like classic real estate agent, does not care. Like, she goes, she's like, hi, what's your name? And I was like, oh, we have a... Oh, because you need to register. to register. Cause they want to then hound you. Are you going to buy it? Are you

going to do it? Oh, I thought you had to pre-register, but she just meant, give me your name and number now to register. And I go, oh, sorry, we haven't booked it online. I'm just looking at this for a friend. And she's like, okay, but I still need to know the number. You're such an actor. I'm such an idiot. What's my motivation? Morgan, find your truth. And then Morgan... I'm going to channel Javier Bardem. I am down on my luck. All of a sudden I'm Spanish.

Hello. Don't tell me Pablo got it wrong. So then Morgan's taken over because I've just completely capitulated. And then Morgan's given her real number and her real email address. Oh, don't change a digit, Morgan. And we have Flo with us. I'm just holding Flo. And, darn. More on. Change a digit. I know. And we have Flo with us and Flo, I'm just holding Flo.

And we look around the house. Also, it wasn't right for you, Sharga. I was like, I was like, Sharga would not like this. No, not my vibe. I saw the photo. It wasn't sterile enough. It was actually a lot worse than I thought it would be, which made me interested because it looks like a nice house from the outside.

It does. A lot of yard. Never judge a book by its cover. Anyway, then Flo just starts wailing. Just loses it. She's trying to communicate. This is not the right place for a show. We've walked in, looked in one room, looked in another, she's crying, I'm like, well,

thank you so much. All the best. Please, please do call my wife 15 times till she exits. Jess and Ducko. One, two, three, three, three. Jess and Ducko's. What's the threesome? So we need a welfare check on Babs. We gave her a whole chorizo. I think she's in the toilet.

Her final stop on Contigui. She's either choking on it or she needs to go poo it out. She's not here because she plays this game with us and she's just left her desk. I think she's in the bathroom. I can't see the chorizo on her desk. I think she's taken the chorizo. I think she just pelicaned the chorizo and went to the toilet. What does she think she's me? You've got to work up to that. You can't be doing that as a rookie. Oh there she is. There she was on the toilet. Come on. We're playing a game. Move at your own pace. So this is the game where Sharga gives us three things.

And we have to tell him what they have in common. Now Babs, were you in the bathroom were you? Yes I was. Everything all good? Yeah, I just thought I had more time. No, never when Cyril plays with the moonlight in the last. Minute 39 that goes. Okay, sorry guys, that was my bad.

That's fine. Did you finish that chorizo? Everyone listening now, now half a million people know that you were in the bathroom. Okay, let's play the game. Ha ha ha ha! To wash your hands, you filthy pig.

Nah, do you wanna? Ha ha ha ha! Ah, She's playing today. She's cool. She's not going to see for three weeks. She's excited. First one. Antarctica, Greenland and Iceland. Ice things. Places with penguins. Cold places. Jess was close to it. Something about an island? Like it's on its own covered in ice? Cold, very cold destinations. Penguins. Cold regions, I'll take that. Really? Out of all the things we said it was cold regions.

He went real niche and we let him forget about it week one so now I think he's gone real generic. Zeus, Poseidon, Hades. Great gods. They are great gods. Come on, babes, we're getting off the floor. Get out of the toilet. Batman, Joker, Pangolin. Oh Batman heroes, Batman villains. DC heroes.

You've done this before haven't you? Vigilantes. Vigilantes. Batman, oh characters in Batman. The characters in something around that area. In Gotham. In Gotham. Oh get out. Are you joking? The TV show Gotham. Are Gotham. Oh, get out! The TV show.

Are you joking? The TV show Gotham, yeah. Are you joking me? Hey, hey, hey. Oh. Will Boss For The Reason be back after professionals and alimants? Oh my.

Hobart. Wellington. Dunedin. Cold places. Tasmania. South places. South places in the south. Southern Hemisphere cities, I'll give it.

Oh, right. Oh, yep, that's exactly what I said. Yeah. K2, Mount Everest, Kilimanjaro. Mountains. High mountains. Mountains you can hike. Mountains in...

K2? Keep going. Mountains. You can hike. The highest peaks in the world. Just say it in a different way. Mountains you can walk up. I don't know if they're the highest.

You can wear shoes and hiking boots and walk up. No. What? Mountains? K2 Everest and Mount Kilimanjaro. Mountains. Mountain ranges. Snowy mountains.

Oh yeah. People die on the mountains. Something about mountains? Mountains with base camps. Oh yeah. No. What are you? Okay.

That's correct. Just famous peaks. Oh my god. See No. Okay. That's correct. Just Famous Peaks. Oh my god. See? It's impossible. Famous Peaks. It's not impossible. You've gotten some of them.

Coachella, Glastonbury, The Music Festival Loser. They are music festivals, Babs. Well done, Babs. Thanks. Just spreading the lights out here. Good on you. Bardo, Killing Heidi,

and the Veronica's. Girl Bands. No, they're Australian girl bands. From? Brisbane. Hey. From the 2000s? Yes, yes. Oh!

One more. Asgard, Arendale, Narnia. Oh, fictional places. Mystical places. Fictional Kingdoms. Obviously, it's just what I said. Big Asgard. I gave you the point.

Jess and Ducco. Jess and Ducco. Right now, Ducco. Five weeks old, this new friendship of mine. Hard to make friends as an adult, you know. It is. Now, I'll give you a quick backstory. Mutual friend sends me a DM, Laura.

She goes, babes, a friend of mine has just moved up from Sydney. I reckon you guys would get along. That's always, that's danger to town when someone says that. It is, but she gave a great pitch. She goes, she's got a daughter, basically the same age, also in media. I give her a thumbs up. I reckon you'll, you'll get along. She loves Gorman. She didn't go that far. If she had, I would have said, this is my address, send her over.

But I trust Laura. So I went, I'll give this chick the time of day. So we DM, whatever, get the girls together. We thought that's a good buffer. It's like a first date, adult first date as a parent. Get the kids together. Get the kids together. Isn't that risky if the kids then just don't like each other

and your kid like slaps her or something? You've met Lucia enough times now. She is a very independent lady. She doesn't engage with other children. So we go to this playground. Lucia and Phoebe did not spend one minute of time together. And it's also, you'll come to learn this yourself. When you're at a playground, as much as they're designed for babies, there's a lot of problems and potential disasters. So you've got to be on. Yeah, you've got to be on. No, I know that about playgrounds. You know that. I still go to the playgrounds.

For yourself. Yeah, obviously. So you go there to actually get to know someone, even to catch up with a friend, I imagine. You spend no time talking because all you're doing is making sure your kid doesn't neck themselves jumping off the slide. Yeah, you've got one eye on them the entire time. Which actually was all right because again, first dates, whether they are romantic or friendship can be awkward. So at least with a little bit of a buffer, we weren't stuck with no

conversation or awkward silences. True. So we sort of worked out this was nice. Should we do it again without the babies? Yeah. I think we'd had one dinner and the mutual friend came. So we had that buffer, but we've worked out, yeah, there's something. Ditch Laura, do it without the mutual friend. Yeah. That's what but we've worked out. Yeah, there's something ditch Laura do without the mutual friend

Yeah, that's what I tried to do last Friday. Okay. Okay. I message her name is lies I'm sure she won't mind me outing it. I message her in the morning. I say babe My day has cleared up. I was meant to have a couple of appointments, but I actually had this string of bad luck They all canceled on me. Do you want to go for lunch? I know it's, you know, I know it's last minute, but I know your kids in daycare. You should be free, right? She hits me back pretty quickly with a message.

I'm so sorry. I've got back to back meetings. I went, no worries. She's a freelancer in media, as I said. No worries, no harm done. I take myself out for lunch. It's a pasta special at one of my favourite restaurants. I said, harm done. I take myself out for lunch. So pasta special at one of my favorite restaurants. I said, I'm going to take myself out for spaghetti lunch.

You saw. Yeah. So I'm sitting there and you take the photo of the food. I wanted to send it to Angus being like, living my best. When I get a tap on the shoulder, it's lies. She's rolled into this restaurant and she goes, well, this is awkward. Oh, no, she's having lunch with another lady. Oh, but that's is that her meeting or is that social? Yeah, she tried to tell me that was her meeting. I call BS. Oh, she goes, ah, I clearly to be honest, I didn't even let her finish.

Hahaha, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the end of that. Back-to-back meetings. Oh, hustle culture, gotta earn my bark, whatever. I have no time for a quick power lunch with you, Jess. I've got back-to-back meetings. Did you meet her person she was meeting with? That lady had, I think sensed the energy and chuffed off. She did not hang around. Got scared. Lies did not introduce me to her, but she clearly went, you know, it was midday. It was relatively relatively quiet it's not like she could have snuck around and blended into the crowd yeah and from my position I was seeing the whole restaurant. If I'm if I think I'm

correct about who you're talking about this was the restaurant you guys initially met at wasn't it? This is where you initially met her. This is where we had our date with the third person. You're absolutely right. It was the scene of the crime. Exactly. Yeah. Cause she said to me, hang on a minute. When you offered me lunch, when I text her that morning, I had suggested a different restaurant because I had said, Hey, do you want to meet me here for lunch? So she obviously has gone, well, even if she goes there with someone else or by herself, I can go to this other restaurant.

She's never going to see me here. She's never going to see me here. Who is in, who, who, who is at fault here? Well it feels like she's got another friend that she didn't want to merge with. Like she's making lots of friends and you're thinking it's you and her with this special bond. See she's new to town. Here I am thinking maybe there could have been an opportunity where she goes oh well I'm actually having lunch with Emily. Why don't you join us? But then maybe she didn't want to. Here I am like a lunch with Emily. Why don't you join us? Here I am like a big fat loser.

Maybe she didn't think you and Emily would get along. She thought you might ask Emily what's keeping you up at night too early in the conversation, scare her off and she couldn't handle it. Scare off her new friend. No lies, I'm the only one you can be friends with. Did you then continue to she have her lunch and you have yours? Yeah and I stared at the back of her head trying to give her bad juju vibes like burning a hole in the back of her head. Yeah that would have been fun for her and Emily. And I don't trust her even though as I said in media, she's just sent me a voice note.

She goes, I'm listening, but I'm just about to walk into Pilates. Please find my voice note. Is she walking into Pilates or is she going to another radio station? Oh, that's a great question, Daco. Jess and Daco. I did just mention the saccable offence a new friend of mine committed after saying I've got back-to-back work meetings. I can't meet you for lunch. And then she appeared at the restaurant I happen to take myself to to drown my own sorrows guilty tap me on the shoulder and went well, this is awkward

She was clearly Just having a nice little lunch with a different friend. Yeah, didn't want to mesh the worlds. You didn't want to mesh the worlds, you didn't want to collide worlds. By yourself and you had to eat your cacio e pepe. I had to eat my cacio e pepe and my glass of wine which was just superb. Would have been nicer with a friend across the table. Wouldn't it? Liza just text me, she went listen I'd call, I want those Keith Urban tickets, but I'm walking into Pilates. Oh yeah. Is it Pilates with a group of friends?

Probably. Who's to say? But she has sent us a voice memo. So, this is totally unfair because I'm just about to walk into my Pilates class. We get it. But in my defence, Jess and I had locked in lunch and then on a Monday she cancelled. And then I booked in for lunch with my friend who's just had a newborn and then on a Monday she cancelled and then I booked in for lunch with my friend who's just had a newborn and then on Friday she cancelled so I was like well bugger and

I did have a lot of meetings but I was like you know what I'm pregnant I'll take a lunch meeting am I in the wrong probably maybe but she did cancel on me first. Oh hang on a minute you didn't tell us that side of the story. Oh, yeah, I don't think you needed to know that Okay, so you'd actually canceled on her initially because me at those appointments I had I was like it's too much on my plate So you booked in with her then what I've actually I too much on then your schedule free up You're free again, and then yeah, hang on a minute Yes in the morning Hang on a minute! I don't think... how is that relevant? All aboard the Dollar Train! Toot toot! I just did some live sound effects.

Hey, you got 30 seconds. Sends you 10 questions all started with the same letter. Have to take your first answer. Can't use the same answer twice. Have to take your first answer. Yep, said that. But probably for $10,000. That's an A show cross you did from Thomas the Tank Engine World has just put you in

good stead for any train references. You're the fat controller made fit. You're the fit controller. The fit controller. Oh, geez. Doesn't have the same ring to it does it? And we don't like to call him the fat controller anymore, what is his name that they gave him? Oh, BMI over 20. Oh yeah, it was something ridiculous.

Yeah, yeah, something that I kind of remember anymore anyway. The jolly controller. The jolly controller. Anyway, we want to give you some money! Corinne, good morning. Good morning. Corinne, babe, as of today, Ducco and I are heading off on professional development as he's shy guy because he takes his job seriously. Babs will be hanging back. But this is the last chance we've got to give ten grand. Are you gonna take it off us? Absolutely, I am. Yeah! What do you want to spend the money on?

I'd love to get a caravan for my family. I've got four girls and a husband obviously. And him. And he can come. Where would you have your sights set on if you got that caravan? First place you'd go? Probably up the North Coast somewhere. Take the girls to Queensland. I haven't been there before. Oh wow, what a beautiful drive that'll be. 4X comes out of the water there Oh yeah

First thing we need to do though Is get you the 10 grade. Oh, yeah, and then you can start planning this adventure for your family I'm acting like she's already won. And you know what? That's the great energy to put out into the universe Thank you. Corinne don't freak out when you hear the letter That's okay. What is it? It's towards the back end of the alphabet you're gonna play with the letter V. V for victory. Oh V, V. Yeah no good I'm glad we clarified. V for victory. Yeah okay. Your time is gonna start after the first question you ready? Yep. Starting with the letter V Corinne. We need you to name a TV show. A non-alcoholic drink. Veggie juice. An Aussie singer. The Veronica's. A medicine. A girl's name. Veronica. An occupation. An international city?

Venice. A food? Vegetables. A condiment? A path. A type of vehicle? Ah, damn, I think we knew what we'd done with the Veronica's. I know!

They are Australian. Absolutely. But it's the Veronica's. The Veronica's, I know. But it's the Veronica's. The Veronica's I know. You're after Vance Joy. Vanessa Amaroff. Vanessa of course. Big fans appear on this show. Look a TV show could have been Vikings or Veronica Mars as well, one of Babs's favourites. A medicine could have been a Valium or Shaggy's favourite, Viagra. A condiment could have been vinegar and then a type of vehicle, a van, a Ves Vespa a Volkswagen look we don't get the money

Corrine I'm sorry. We don't get the van, but you do get You do get three months coffee subscription. Thanks to Lord Supply embrace the chaos with Lord Supply absolute legends No worries. Thank you so much. Thank you Corrine. Thanks Corrine Have an awesome holiday guys. It's not a holiday, it's professional development Corrine, I'll be developing and you know, we're all upskilling. I've signed up to a course in Milan. Like I'm traveling that far for my PD. I'm gonna go to the Apple store and take like a Word course with all the oldies. Yeah, it's gonna be good. Just gonna learn my way around a computer. Mate, you and that genius, you're gonna have a hell of an afternoon. Thanks Corinne. Shigoy, is that you? Thank you Corinne.

Damn it, so Shigoy that means you need to keep that $10,000 safe for three whole weeks. Are you gonna take it to your ski fields? It's not safe that I do that. Oh no, I want to see you with the briefcase handcuffed to your wrist. Yeah, like the ball. What do they call it in America? The nuclear. The codes, is that the ball? Oh yeah, football. The football. The nuclear football. Yeah, Is that the ball? Football! The football.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Take it as seriously as that. Come on. Yeah. Up next though, or jeez, this story broke overnight at a Coldplay concert in the States. Was it the States? I don't know where they were. It was...

We'll find it. We'll get the sheet printed and we'll let you know. Where it was doesn't matter. Yeah, it's what happened. Because who was involved is what is making headlines. It will be all over your feed. It's all over the telly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've got to talk about who got caught doing what at a Coldplay concert. Do it next. Jeff and Ducko. When did you have to hide? As an adult, you had to hide. Something went on. Maybe you're doing something wrong. Maybe you ran into someone you didn't want to and you literally

had to hide in public. There is nothing quite like your brain going, DUCK! DUCK! It's the only option. Do not confront your problems head on. Just hide. Yeah. Now speaking of Duck, that is exactly what happened at a Coldplay concert.

You've recently seen Coldplay. My husband is a massive fan. Yeah, he loves Apple and Chris Martin. His brother, his mum and there was a fourth ticket so I was like let me go see what the hype is. And you don't even like Coldplay. I shouldn't have taken the seat if I'm honest with you, Ducko. I appreciate arguably the biggest if not one of the biggest bands in the world. I don't get it. So I love a bit of Coldplay. I like old school Coldplay. He's quite live. They're all great live. They're all good live.

I just, it's just a snore. Well, it wasn't a snore for two of them, right? So Andy Byron, so he is the CEO of Astronomer. Astronomer's a tech company, okay? Yes. So Andy Byron, I actually don't know how much he's worth, but he would be worth a fair bit. Look, people really want these Keith Urban tickets, so people are already calling for When Did You Hide, so our Googlers are taking calls.

I'll have a look up Andy Byron Net Worth. Yeah. So it's an astronomer is the company and the company is meant to be some big tech company, right? He's at this Coldplay concert now to set this thing. Between 20 and 70 million estimated net worth. He's going all right. Because you just need to Google Andy Byron today.

And everything is up. It's not exactly a weird name. No. People know who we're talking about. So this is the modern age of technology we live in, right? He's at a Coldplay concert. Now he is married with two kids, I believe. They are not there. He's at the concert when like the kiss cam or like the Jumbotron, whatever they call it, pans on them. He's in his like private suite area. I can confirm at the Coldplay concert, Chris really, Chris Martin obviously leads singer,

the camera they know that Chris wants to do it, they pan to different people exactly like in a stadium and he sort of plays off it, maybe sings a line of a song or references it. He likes to sort of engage with his crowd in that way. Well he does that here right, the camera pans on him and he's not with his wife, he's behind straddling dancing slowly and centrally with Kristen Kabot who actually works for him as his Chief People Officer in HR obviously, okay? It looks very intimate, it looks very couple-y.

Couple-y, and then the camera pans on him, he then turns and ducks and then she- And he shucks out a frame. And then she ducks away and Chris Martin says this live. He hit the nail on the head. It is unbelievable because I have been at shows like these and people do freak out. They don't want to be on camera whether it's at the footy or at a concert, then they do panic, maybe hide behind their hands. But the way Andy and, is it Kristen?

Kristen? Kristen. Kristen turn away. It obviously leads Kristen going, something sucks. He has one of the great brain panics. He just ducks, he just loses it. And she just turns around so you're gonna see her back. Turns out they're having an affair.

So they've just been caught on camera coincidentally. Chris Martin has said that coincidentally. It has now gone viral. People have spotted them. His wife has now changed her, like changed her married status and stuff like that online and tried to change her name. So it doesn't have his name. It's moved so quickly as it would.

I mean, it's caught fire around the world. To make it worse, the girl he was with having the affair who's the chief people officer, she just got a promotion only a couple of weeks ago at work and the person next to them also works in HR for their company so other people are there. Oh, I see the one giggling, sort of smiling awkwardly. So there was a few people there who knew it was happening. So the office romance is no secret in the office.

I guess not. I cannot believe, because you think in a stadium of what, potentially 80,000? Yep. That's who they've panned to. And then Chris Martin happens to say, ew, they're having an affair or they're just shy. Cause he's been touring for 40 years, 30 years, like he would have seen so many people react differently and he says that line and hits the nail on the head. But it begs the question, Ducko.

Oh yeah. When did you have to hide? When did you have to hide? It doesn't just need to be an affair, like it can be, you had to hide from a boss did you have to hide? When did you have to hide? It doesn't just need to be an affair. Like it can be, you had to hide from a boss, you had to hide from a friend. Hey man, we've all called in sick and then you accidentally see your boss at Woolworth

looking very happy. I remember once, an ex-girlfriend years and years ago, she was house sitting and so I was at her place. One thing led to another and then all of a sudden her mum does an unexpected drop in. While the mum's coming, we hear her open the front door and say, Hello! No clothes on in the nude.

There's a panzell stucco. Yeah yeah. I had to fully grab my clothes like a scene from a movie, hide into the cupboard. It's almost like the husbands come home. 100% hide into the cupboard while she's coming in and then my ex-partner at the time has walked out and spoken to her mum, then I've had to go under the bed, then I've had to go out the back door and climb over the fence while trying to reach my undies on to run into my 91 Toyota Corolla and get out of there.

I love the neighbours just doing their lawn across the road being like, hello, what's going on here? Nothing is scarier than being naked in a cupboard when your girlfriend's mum is there and she doesn't really know much about you. The girlfriend's mum going, sweetheart, why are you so flushed? Arse is warming here mum. I don't know.

It was. I was doing calisthenics in the bedroom. Hiding as an adult is funny. Like hiding as an adult when you really have to and there's a lot on the line. 100%. It just takes you back to childlike, but the stakes are a lot higher. Very high. Oh my God.

So for Keith Urban tickets. Yep. When did you have to hide? What did you do? What did you do? Who were you hiding from? It was either that or did you get caught like, but the stakes are a lot higher. Very high. Oh my God. So for Keith Urban tickets, when'd you have to hide? What did you do? What'd you do? Who were you hiding from? It was either that or did you get caught in the Jumbotron? We'll take either. We'll get you on next.

Jess and Ducco. Jess and Ducco. When did you have to hide? Maybe we should actually send Keith this podcast episode. Just to keep him up today. What can go wrong at a concert? Oh, true. Like what happened at Coldplay's concert in Massachusetts,

the Gillette Stadium yesterday. Coldplay like to do a thing. They pan the camera around so Chris can acknowledge different people at their concert. How you doing tonight, everyone? Looking so beautiful. Maybe sing a line of a song, dedicate something to the different fans while the kiss cam it's being referred to pans up to a

couple. The man behind the woman cuddling in swaying back and forth they are in quite the embrace. They do they look like a cute couple. They look like a cute couple. And you realize it's Andy Byron who is the CEO of a massive tech company called Astronomer, which is worth $1.3 billion that company. He is straddling up to his Chief People Officer in HR who just recently got a promotion, Kristin Cabot, who is not his wife. His wife and kids are at home. They've been caught. He ducks, hides.

She then turns around. Chris Martin makes a comment about hopefully we didn't uncover an affair. He didn't know what to do. And now the internet has absolutely... It's a lie. ...come for him, come for her... The wife. The poor wife.

Oh my god. But like, I'm surprised how fast this story has moved. Unbelievable. We've got people in our wiping social media, this and that. It makes me feel like someone who had the camera new, like, I don't know. It's a racket. You know what I mean? I mean, when you're worth that much.

Yeah, exactly. Like, and he's from that ta, not town, from that place. I think that's where Astronomer is based. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my God, what an idiot. So we thought, when did you hide is the fun way to go with this. When did you have to hide? We don't need affair stories on air, we need hiding stories.

I'd actually be happy to not have an affair story. But Claire, good morning to you. Good morning. When did you have to hide? I had to hide in Kmart the day after dismissing an employee for professional issues. What do you mean? Did they come back to confront you or something? No, so I was shopping at Kmart. So I'd been involved in a dismissal and then went shopping and randomly sort of came up. Oh no. Just behind the corner track. Yeah you can't see them again.

Not in a public place, not that quickly. No. So did they see you hiding amongst the exercise gear or whatever? No. I was lucky, it quick ducked down and they walked away. Aww. What's that giant exercise ball doing? I can't tell who that is.

Who is that? Claire. That's I can't tell who that is. Who is that? Claire. Oh, that's a good one. Avoid that. Lily, good morning. Good morning. How are you?

Yeah, pretty good babe. When did you have to hide? I had to hide as an adult at a church funeral. It was my partner's grandfather's funeral and I started talking to a random lady and it was actually both of our partners when we asked, how did we know the grandfather? So we had to, yeah. So I had to jump in and in the garden next door to the church and hide. And he found us.

Um, let's just say we didn't go to the funeral and neither did he. It ended up in a brawl at the front of the church. You and this other woman. No, no, I didn't really care that much. No, it was the other woman and him. She got her keys and hit him across the face. So you were both in the relationship with him for how long? She was really in a relationship.

She loved him. It was just fun to fill in time in between. I see. So why did he go, yeah, come to the funeral and knowing you'd both be there. He wanted me to go. I didn't want to go, but he told her she couldn't go because of the different, she was Aussie and he wasn't and the family wouldn't accept it. So he just thought she wouldn't go, that he had her sorted. But she's probably going, well, it's your grandfather. I've got to pay my respects and... Yeah, she found out and yeah, that was it. And so anyway, her and I ended up going to the pub and having a great afternoon after that.

Are you still mates with her? No. No, fair enough. But you can bury the hatchet. She brawled him, went to the pub. What a funeral. And you know what, that's cool. I hate it when I hear about the women fighting.

It's like, ah, no, he's in the wrong. So Lily and this woman have gone. Yeah, I said, you can have him. I've never liked him like that anyway. And also you don't have to sit through the funeral now, Lillie, to wash a wind. Oh my god. Wow, that is wild. Luke, good morning.

Good morning, how are you? Oh look, we're doing better than this bloke who got busted on the Coldplay Kiss Cam, that's for sure. But when have you had to hide? Oh, so I was living and working in Bangkok at the time and then I'll COVID hit and they'd shut down everything in Bangkok as you can imagine and then there was one flight going back to Australia. They'd cancelled three or four beforehand. This was the last flight coming back but before I got in the cab I was like all right let's just see how we go. Got in the cab the cabbie said to me listen there's military checkpoints there's cops everywhere they're not going to let you through.

I said right what if I give you 50 bucks and you chuck me in the boot and we'll just see how it goes. So I ended up hanging 50 bucks, jumped in the boot of the car, he covered me in blankets, in with my big suitcase. Absolutely no room at all and we got through and I got on a plane, that was the last flight back from Bangkok after this. Shut up! Oh, it's only $50? How good is that? Oh my god, look! That's a lot of money for him over there. Your heart rate in that moment must have been

you would have felt like you were pounding through the boot. Are they going to hear me? I'll tell you what, there was no aircon in that boot. I was sweaty. It would have been hot, and also you're just trusting this cabbie that he's taking the wrong place. He could take you $50 and they'd go, yeah, there's a guy in the boot. Did they ever open the boot or anything or they never even opened it? No, no, nothing.

Just snuck through. How good is that? That's anyway he would get home. Wow. Luke, thank you. It's a great one. Mel, let's wrap up with you. When did you have to hide?

Hi, how are you both? Good. Great. Good Mel. This is not something I'm proud of. I was known to be too friendly to Jehovah witness door knockers. And this particular family that used to come, they were elderly and then, you know, brought all the hangar on us.

Um, I saw them, we were busy. I had three small children and the blinds were open. I saw them coming up the driveway and I said to the kids, oh my God, quick, jump behind the kitchen bench and sit on the floor and hide. So we sat there with hands over mouths because the kids were laughing, waited for them to knock on the door and they're going, ha ha, Melissa, hello, and waited for them to leave and I was so embarrassed. But yeah, the kids were quiet and they left without me having to confront them at all.

Well, Mel, I mean, talk about mixed messages. Every other day you're letting them in, three course meal, cup of tea. Today's the day you don't wanna let them in. I mean. Yeah, yeah, yeah, come on. They're just, like, this one's a guarantee. She loves us. Melissa! Melissa!

They used to even drive and park in the driveway. Oh, they're just visiting a friend now, they don't even try to convert you. Jess and Ducko. Hey carve out two minutes of your day, head to the Jess and Ducko Instagram. If you missed it yesterday we dropped the dancing diggers, we went out to Gatto Sales and Repairs, they said we've got diggers, we can make them dance. We got you. We got you. The team at Newie Digital putting together an unbelievable recap. It was very funny. Oh my god, it was so good. Highly, highly recommend. My brother who's in construction, Ducco, very hard man.

Please look at his giggle. He texts me and he went, that digger dance. He texts me and goes, do you guys have your white cards? Are you authorized? He corrected himself, he wrote good job. No, in fact, great job. I went, Jesus Christ, that is the highest praise I've had from my brother in a long time. A lot of people message in saying how much they loved it

but now they want just the video of the diggers doing the dance. Yeah, they're like less Jess and Ducco, more dance and digging. Can we just see the diggers do the dance? But the problem is, when you're doing to the window, to the wall, the diggers take 20 seconds to get to the window.

And by the time you're on the wall, the sweat's dropping down the ball. This is the classic thing. People think they want the raw, the unedited, give us more. It's like, no, no. Yeah, yeah. Trust us, what you've got is exceptional.

Is the best version. Yeah, that's the best version. Go check out for yourself though. We might try and cut up a video. Sure. Of just them. And I'll try and carve out a video of just them. Sure. And I'll try and carve out some time in professional development.

Yeah, I can too. Jess and Ducco. It's pretty cool that we've got the diary to look back at the week that was, because it's been a hell of a week. And we forget what we did yesterday, which is why we need the diary. You and I have both read The Power of Now, and we are true subscribers to Living in the Moment, so it's hard to remember. Do I tell you, when I got my haircut the other day, one of the other barbers was like,

hey, I heard that thing you do on the radio the other day where you're talking about tall people. And I was like, ah, what did I say? What did I say? He's like, well, you were saying like, heightest. My God. Because he was short as well. People are listening.

He's like, I get you, bro. I was like, thanks man. Because our boss is skewed out. He's like, I get you bro. I was like, thanks man. Because our boss is skewed out. He always goes, people are half listening, they're busy, family's getting ready for work, no one's actually paying attention. People are paying attention. Yeah.

To be fair, this was a promo. He didn't hear the full thing. And he didn't know the context. He heard it at 3pm. Anyway, here's the diary. Well, what a wicked spin with Jess and Ducco. Producer Babs has been up against it since her boyfriend left her for Europe. What do you mean?

There's someone coming up to you guys. You guys are so insidious. Yeah, yeah, because, yeah. We've obviously said something that we both like and have found someone for us. What are you talking about? Ah. Well, Ducco, I'm gonna put a little...

The surprise guest they've got at seven. Oh, sorry, I wasn't listening. Oh, my God. I'm having a morning. Can you stop guest, they've got it at seven. Oh, sorry, I wasn't listening. Oh my god. I'm having a morning. Can you stop throwing it at me? How are you not listening? We just-

Can you stop throwing to me, please? We just chatted to you. But everyone else seems to be doing okay. We launched Daco's acting school where Jess and I reenacted an iconic scene from the movie The Notebook. So prepare your Oscar speech now. Lights, cameras, action! So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard and we're gonna have to...

Work for it. Line? It's in front of you. So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard and we're gonna have to work at this every day. But I wanna do that because I want you. Tell me more. Say it again. You and me every day but I want to do that because I want you. Tell me more! You and me every day? Will you do something for me?

Please? Will you pitch your life for me 30 years from now? 40 years from now? What's it look like? If it's with that guy, go. Go I lost you once, I think I could do it again. If I thought it's what you really wanted but don't take the easy way out. I didn't mean to take the easy way out. Man, I need a piece.

What easy way? There is no easy way. No matter what I do, somebody is going to get hurt. Would you stop thinking about what everyone wants? Stop thinking about what I want, what he wants, what your parents want. What do you want? He asks again. What do you want? It's not that simple! What do you want? God damn it, what do you want? He asks again. What do you want? It's not that simple! What do you want? God dammit, what do you want? I have to go.

And scene. Scene, cut, cut, cut, cut. We went through some insulting names like Champ and Muscles, but there was two of us stuck out over the rest. I think this is my favourite of all of them. So if you're talking to someone in conversation, I'll address you, I'll go. Yes, you're talking to someone in conversation, I'll address Shaga. Yes, please do.

How you going today, big wheels? Oh, I've never heard big wheels. Oh, I love that. What's up with you, big wheels? Big wheels is so condescending. It's like a giant child. Oh, I love big wheels. I'm gonna start using it around the office.

Okay, big wheels. Is it too late to drop Rice Cooker and pick up big wheels as our term of endearment? And then this one, this is a great one, I'll address Sharga again in this one because he's loving this so much. Sharga, hey, you're producing the show today Turbo? Oh I love Turbo! Yeah!

Big Wheels keep on turning! We thought we'd test out some of these new names with NRL player Adam Elliott to see his reaction when he came in studio. Good morning Big Wheels. Big Wheels. We were waiting to see how you'd react. So we did today the most condescending names you can call people and Big Wheels. Well Big Wheels isn't up there.

Big Wheels is up there. Big Wheels is up there. Isn't it so sub-gen- My coffee this morning went for a swim. Yeah. What's your name, Buddy? Oh, Buddy, bud. How did Buddy not get out, Lee?

Because people call him champions on there. I see, champion. I love champion. I say it as a term of endearment. Yeah, it doesn't come up. Clutchioni. Champion. Thank you, there's a connection there.

We thought Big Wheels was hilarious. We started calling Shy Guy Big Wheels. We're like, when Adam comes in, let's call Big Wheels and Turbo. Chief Turbo Buddy's a connection there. We thought Big Wheels was hilarious. We started calling Shy Guy Big Wheels. We're like, when Adam comes in, let's call Big Wheels and Turbo. Chief Turbo Buddy is a great one. Turbo rubbed me up the way. Yeah, I can tell. She said Big Wheels and I was like,

Turbo, you're like, hmm. Hi, my name is. Big Wheels? My name is. Buddy Bud. My name is. Champion. Things got awkward between Jess and her dad

after he brought up her toe sucking thing during a phone call. Telephone. Papa Fart calls me yesterday, Ducco. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He wants to check in. Yeah. And then goes, what's this I hear about Ducco licking feet? Or was it toes? Hang on, that's you. Hang on a minute. Ducco. Hang on a minute. Ducco.

Hang on a minute. My dad. When, no, no, there was something about toes. Wasn't he licking toes? I said, before I remembered who I was on the phone with, I went, No, Dad, that's me. And he went, what? Oh, no. He goes, was it licking toes? I said, technically, it's sucking toes.

He went, what's that about? I said, oh, well, it kind of came up on the show because I told Ducco, I don't mind my toes being sucked. And he went, all right, we can leave it there. See you in a few weeks, Rice Cookers. Jess and Ducco. It is time to draw our final Keith Urban ticket. Double pass to Keith Urban's Newcastle show plus a night at Newcastle's iconic beachfront

destination, Noah's on the beach. This is a hell of a prize and we've had it every single day this week. Big thanks to Keith for being so generous. Yeah, Keith. We've got more tickets as well when we come back from professional development. Absolutely, because Keith wants rice cookers in his crowd. Yes, he does. They're a good sort.

Earlier this hour, Ducko, we asked, when did you have to hide? When did you hide? After our mate who works for- Andy. Andy, who works for- Astronomer. Astronomer. The company has 1.3 billion. He is very rich, Andy Byron's his name.

He was having an affair with his, well, somebody who works in HR- Alleged. I mean, they were just cuddling. True, they were just cuddling. They were smooching. When Fix You plays, you cuddle the nearest person. You and I are often seen in this position. Me behind you, just wrap my arms around you, swaying gently to Fix You.

We call it the Titanic pose. That's right. You want to be king of the world. She's the chief people officer, works in HR. Her name is Kristen. They were cuddling. The kiss cam goes on them. He then ducks and hides and she turns around and Chris Martin says, oh, I hope I haven't uncovered an affair. And the internet has blown up. Obviously. So it begs the question, when have you had to hide? And Luke gave us this absolute ripper.

So I was living and working in Bangkok at the time and then I'll COVID hit and they'd shut down everything in Bangkok as you can imagine. And then there was one flight going back to Australia. They cancelled three or four beforehand. This was the last flight coming back. But before I got in the cab, I was like, all right, let's just see how we go. Got in the cab, the cabbie said to me, listen, there's military checkpoints, there's cops everywhere. They're not going to let you through. I said, right, what if I give you 50 bucks and you chuck me in the boot and we'll just see how we go. So I ended up hanging 50 bucks,

jumped in the boot of the car, he covered me in blankets, in with my big suitcase, absolutely no room at all. And we got through and I got on a plane, that was the last flight back from Bangkok. Back to the show. Shut up! Oh, but it's only $50?

Like, what is that? Unbelievable tale. Amazing story. Oh, it's only $50 like Unbelievable tale amazing story because imagine what Luke would have had to sort of go through if he'd been stuck there I know couldn't get home Luke. Thank you for that amazing story. You've won the call of fame You're off to Keith Urban doll, do you like a bit of Kee Keefy? Oh I do like a bit of Keefy, yeah. I think I might give it to my folks though. They're massive fans, so I might do an early Christmas present and give it to them. God, well tell them you pay full price. I mean don't tell them you won them on the radio. You stay at Noah's though, they can just go to the concert.

You make sure you get the accommodation. That's a good call. Awesome, thanks Luke. Thanks so much. Have a great rest of your Friday and to everyone else have a wonderful three weeks because we've got to go develop professionally. And funny that all our professional developments are in different parts of the world. Yours is in Italy.

Mine's in New Zealand. Absolutely. I've got into a very prestigious course right on the border of Lake Como. Good on you. I can't believe I got in. I know. I go into the next best one. They sent me to New Zealand. That's right. And your essay was superb

I don't know how you didn't get picked for the late con. Lots of spelling mistakes and they said okay We'll take it down there. The Italians are quite finicky that way. Very much so. The Kiwis are a bit more generous. A bit more lax you know Shagos go into Threadbo that's where yours is. That's where yours is and Babs Where did you get into again for professional development? The office. Oh, we're great. It's a great place to be Babs Vibes are high and positivity is always here. It has good views. It does have good views. It has good views and free coffee. Oh, there you go. What a great attitude. Hey, you're gonna come back the most developed I reckon? Yeah, or tired. You know, if that is some subtle foreshadowing that you'll still be yawning in three weeks time,

you get it together, sis. You'd leave it at the door. But now we are off for a couple of weeks, professionally developing, so we won't be here but we'll be back on August 11th? August 11th and the number of superstars that are coming to Australia in the back end of the year. We're talking Gaga, we're talking Capaldi, mate, we're talking Kravitz, we're talking Kendrick, we're talking Ricky Martin. You added Kravitz in.

I added Kravitz in. We have got tickets to Kravitz. Thank you! We interviewed Kravitz, he's friend of the show. Good friend of the show. And did you see his daughter just got nominated for an Emmy? Oh my god. For her role in that show you've been enjoying?

Yes. The studio. The studio, yes, yes, yes. The Kravitz family. The Kravitz family. They are very talented, but we are going to have tickets to all of them. The hottest stars. The hottest stars, let alone Fridays Live. When we come back, we have got more tickets to Fridays Live. Mariah Pipple, Lil John, Wiz Khalifa.

That's going to be so exciting. Your girl Jordan Sparks. Yeah, Sparks. He's there. Have a little Sparks in months. She's coming down under just for you. It's going to be good. Yeah, months. Oh yeah, we catch up semi-frequently. Absolutely, that's why I didn't say good friend of the show. She's just good friend of Ducko's. He's the Duck Man's friend, yeah. She won't return my calls.

Well, you guys have a good time, I miss you guys. I know, right? Our time zones are gonna be all out of whack. So even if I do message and say, what's Shy Guy doing right now? It might be 3 a.m. Geez, we won't know. I might have to wake up early.

That might be up. Hey, good luck with your house hunt buddy. Thanks. Hopefully you have somewhere to live. If not, you can always bunk with us. You know, we have a child. You can be in the next room. My house is being kind of demolished, but you could always go bunk there if you wanted.

It's saying your sinkhole. You can see it. It's big enough. Oh god. Thank you for finally acknowledging. No, it's not. It can only fit me, not you. It's so funny.

So we had a meeting with our builder and Angus was like, I'll show you this sinkhole and he went, won't be a problem. Look at my sinkhole. He's like, what's that? What's that weird? It's just a hole in the ground. That little hole that someone dug? Babs, you enjoy yourself too, you have a great time, okay?

Thanks. Don't miss us too much. I'll try not to. Yeah. Oh, we're out of here. Hey, we us too much. I'll try not to. Yeah. Oh, we're outta here. Hey, we appreciate you guys. Absolutely. We're so grateful.

We've had such a great couple of months, but let's go get better. Yeah, obviously. Our service to the rice cookers. We will improve. We will improve. We'll see you in a few weeks. Bye bye.

Ciao. Bye. Hasta poi. Au revoir. Bye bye. Sayonara. Fog is a visible aerosol consisting of tiny water droplets or ice crystals suspended in the air near the Earth's surface, reducing visibility. Nerd. Jess and Ducko! That was the Jess and Ducko podcast.

The rumours are true. Macca's new Mitt griddles is finally on the Brekkie menu.