Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Is there an alarm in this?

Episode Date: January 20, 2025

Jess' husband Angus fell victim to the 'boy look', Year of the Song is back for another year and we ask how far did you go for the craving?Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The new loose change menu has dropped at Macca's. OMG. T's and C's apply. Jess and Duggo. This is the Jess and Duggo podcast. Alright everyone, welcome to the podcast. While we're doing the podcast, we're pilot testing new things, games, or whatever we may do on the show. That's right. We don't want to just go live willy nilly.

No, we can't do that. We're professionals. The one thing we did let go onto the board day one was dregs, and look how that turned out. That's the only thing we didn't test. Yeah, haven't we learned our lesson? So now, with Shy Guy, you know, with his little jam, it left Sweet Babs without something to contribute.

She is, I mean, she wants to feel, you know. She wants to be included. She's got a desk and she's got plants for her desk now. She's got new computers. She did. Unbelievable. You know, like she's got a desk and she's got plans for a desk now. She's got new computers. She did. Unbelievable. You know, she looks good. She looks good.

She's moving up. She's moving around the world. So anyway, we're going to launch it. Are you ready, Babs? We've got an opener here. Yeah, I'm ready. I'm going to launch it. She doesn't look ready to me.

I am. I've got my newspaper. This is Babs' blog. Here we go. Three, two, one. Hey, it's Babs. And this is my blog. Commence Operation Superstar Brat Slay.

I love it. Put her on the board. That's pretty good. I love it. Slay. The Slay was what made it. That is great. Hey, and this is my blog.

Like we were going to deny. No, it might be Duckert. No, it's my blog. Fuck you all. Shark Eye was in there going, more sass, more sass. Great direction. I sent a 3-2-1 in there to make Babs nervous, but I actually didn't mind it at the top of it.

I? It was pretty good. It kind of like kicked you off. Oh. Um, um. All right, so Babs' blog, you can come to us once a week with any content you want, personal, topical, things happening, things you like, you don't like.

And a peek behind the curtain for the rice cookers, this was our way to force Babs to do some work because she went through a phase of sending a few tidbits and then just fell off the radar. Yeah, you would just stop doing that. Just stop doing it. You guys kept making me do it, like on air, and I was just sending it for you to do, not me. Oh, not always.

We enjoyed your content. How are we meant to tell the story of your sister licking butcher's glass? That's true. You have to do that story. I didn't do it very well, apparently. So that's a theme in this show. So what have you got for us today? Okay, so I thought I would come with some Gen Z news.

Yeah. And so there's been a study that's come out that's been really mean, actually. And I just wanted to just kind of draw attention to it and support my friends because it was quite harsh. Your cohort, yes. Yeah, so basically a study has come out to say that apparently Gen Zs are a generation full of snowflakes and we're scared of everything. I'm not hearing the lie at this point. Yeah, I'm still waiting for that. Just wait.

So they've unpacked it a bit. So it was conducted by a motoring and cycling retail to start off with. That's a weird person to conduct a survey. Anyway, so they've found that one in five younger adults don't know what a spanner is, and they seek help from a professional for even the most basic of household tasks. So basically that's what the whole study's about. And they've come out and said that people aged 18 to 27

were most likely to pay a professional to fix a problem, even if it's something really easy like hanging a picture frame. And nearly a quarter admitted they couldn't change a ceiling light bulb or climb a ladder because it's too high. All right, you lost me with ladder. Yeah, that's bad. Yeah, exactly. Okay.

Anyway. Yeah, what's the... The whole thing is I just wanted to get on here and say that's not true. How many ladders have you been up recently? I have gone up ladders. You change light bulbs? I can change a light bulb. Do you know how to use a spanner?

No. I mean, why would you? No. Do you know how to... Do you think that anything that required a spanner... That feels like you should get it professionally. Yes. I don't know what you need a spanner for.

Are you... Can you hang a photo? And I don't mean those sticky things you buy. 3M. I can put a nail in a wall if, like, it came down to it. Well, you're renting. You can't be... Well, that's the argument that I'm getting to.

So basically, the study has come out and all Gen Zs kind of bought up and said, yes, but none of us own houses. So where are we meant to practice? None of you own houses because you're all probably freaking famous on TikTok and it's too saturated. That's right. You can't do what you're going to do. I've never seen you defend the Gen Zs because you're like

a Gen Zer who's not a Gen Zer. I know, but I just saw this article and I was like, that's not very fair because none of us can afford to own houses. And then can I just, can I come back with you at something, Babs? I read on Body and Soul the other day, I think Shy Guy sent it through, that your generation are getting grey hair earlier and earlier. Yes, that was also...

Because you're so stressed, but you guys don't know how to do anything. What are you stressed about? Is it the climate? I think just the climate? The climate, really? The economic climate. Yeah, it's all these things.

Oh, very nice. Gen Z is love. This has gone political. Sorry, it wasn't meant to be. Gen Z is love to, I'm not saying you do this, but Gen Z is love to, woe is me, even if I've had a beautiful upbringing and a great life. It's really tough.

I mean, some of us are bad for that, but I think for us to be able to hang a picture frame or do any of that, we have to construct a really nice message to our landlord and say can we do this? The thing about you the other day, we're really lucky our house just randomly

has those picture rails so we can just hang everything. It's super easy. But I was thinking about the other day, you know I've got a cockroach problem at my house and we're getting the spray guy in. day, you know, I've got a cockroach problem at my house. Yes. And we're getting the spray guy in. What do you do when you're in a rental that's cockroach infested? You have to call your landlord. And can they just be like, nah.

It's on you to get the bug and pest person, though, I believe. Is it? Yeah, in rentals. It was on it. That was my last house that we now own, which we were renting. You've got to get it bug and pested once a year. But who pays for that? I think you do.

What? Check your contract. Yeah, I have to check. I'm pretty sure that was in our last one. Oh, that's sucky, isn't it? Because we never did it, and then we bought the house, and now it's been like four years. There's been no bugging.

I'm like, oh, that's annoying. That is annoying. But normally if something breaks in the house, you get them and they send someone, they pay for it, they fix it. Yes, like we've had a broken window in our house now for a month. And we've called them and it just hasn't been fixed. Because it's out of sight, out of mind for a landlord. It's like, oh, they're dealing with that.

How bad could it be? Yeah, yeah. Because you's out of sight, out of mind for a landlord. It's like, oh, they're dealing with that. How bad could it be? Yeah, yeah. Because you're dealing with gale force winds and a broken window. Yes, and window leakage and cockroaches. It's really hard out here. And you know what? No wonder you're going grey. You know what I often think about, though?

How are any of us, and we're included in this with you, going to have enough money to retire? Oh, we can't. We're working well into our 90s. But even then, I don't think we're going to have, like, it's ridiculous how much money you need to retire. Yes.

Like, it's out of hand. Yes, absolutely. Remember the old lady who used to take shopping? Yeah. And she would get her pension out or whatever that was, the payment. It must have been a pension. Yeah. She would get it out in cash every fortnight so she could see how much money she could

deal with. The woman was 94. Yeah. And, like, how terrible is that to have that pressure on this woman? Yeah. At that age, You just think, oh my God, there's got to be a better way. It has to be. It has to be. Well, there you go.

Look at you defending the agency. Sorry, that wasn't meant to be, like, a political argument. I was just, you know. But that's the beauty of live radio or live podcast. You just don't know where it's going to go, Babs. I don't know where it's going to go. I was just defending us. And I must say, your knowledge, you were able to roll with the punches. You know, if you'd been stuck on your train tracks, you might have gone, whoa, whoa, whoa.

That's all I brought to the table. I thought that was very good. Shaga, what was your take on that from a producer perspective? Yeah, I think she did a good job. So are we keeping Babs's blog? We're keeping Babs's blog. Once a week. Once a week, yeah.

Once a week. Gosh, I don't know if she could do that daily. Shit, no. Once a week, Babs' blog, and it can be anything. Personal thing happening in your life. Sure.

Yeah. I'd love a few personal. Don't keep bringing me articles every time. I want to hear about your grandad and swingers, et cetera, et cetera. I can talk to you about

how I lost my Birkenstock at Guzman the other day. Oh, where? I mean, you should have left with that. Next week. Next week. Holy hell.

Did you find it? Don't tell me. Was it in your burrito? Yeah. Love ya. Holy hell. Did you find it? Don't tell me. Was it in your burrito? Love you. We actually got a really juicy DM, Ducko, that I was excited to read to you. But I reckon we hold that. We're going to hold it.

I don't want anything to – that was perfect today, Dab. Okay, good. Don't you have to apologise. That was fantastic. There you go. That'll be on the show. So what day are we doing that? We can maybe do that on a Monday. Monday.

Start of the week. Yeah, I like that. Oh, I like that too. 6.20 or 6.40 on a Monday? I think depending on the topic, it could go later. Ooh. Okay, 6.20, 6.40, 6.50. 6.50.

We'll keep you in six so you can get naughty. Oh, great. When I think Babs, I think you. Naughty, naughty, crazy. Butt plug chat. Yeah. Okay. Jess and Ducko in the morning.

Welcome to our favourite day of the week, Tuesday. Great attitude, Duckman. Great attitude. Good morning. Good morning. Babs and I hate Tuesdays. You do, but we've turned over a new leaf in 2025. And we're not going to be shit canning any of the days.

Yeah, we're trying. We're trying, you know. Because what you put out is what you get back. So true. Carpe, carpe. Carpe, carpe. Que sera, sera. Ah.

Babs has already had a doozy riding on the board, Shy Guy's wedding chat is coming up. We thought, wow, is this some sort of soft tease? Is this how Shy Guy's announcing he's got engaged in the past 24 hours? Or he'd just tell us he got married in the holidays. That's exactly what Shy Guy would do. 100%. Would have been invited us. Wouldn't have had you involved.

Wouldn't have had me as celebrant. Wouldn't have had Babs as flower girl. Just, I guess I should tell the team, chuck me up on the board for Shy Guy's wedding. Never ever met his partner. Conversation. No. No. Would you do that, Shy Guy's wedding. Never ever met his partner. Conversation. No. No.

Would you do that, Shy Guy? You'd do that, wouldn't you? I wouldn't do that. But I reckon he would do that to his whole family. Like, no one's invited. We're keeping it low key. Except his dogs. His dogs are invited.

Oh, the dogs. Well, someone has to be the ring bearer. And the robo-vac. Oh, well, I think that's who he's marrying. That's insulting. I jest. I jest. Do you? I do. Of course.. Digest, digest. Do you?

I do, of course. Hey, man, I see all our DMs, people thirsting over you. Don't worry, you could get a human. There was a couple of mummies there going, ooh. That's right. Really into the long legs. Long, yeah. The limbs.

The Slim Reaper. On this man. It's because you're in a bit of an enigma, you know. They don't quite know. Yes, you are a mystery wrapped in a riddle. I don't think I am, but I'm sure. Maybe in the love space you are. Would you consider yourself an open book?

No. I don't consider myself an enigma. You don't share anything. Yeah, you say good and fine. Yeah. You never ask and you, you are an enigma, sir. You are an enigma. You're a man of mystery.

What did you do on the weekend? It was fine. Yeah, you are an enigma. You're a man of mystery. I was with you on the weekend. It was fine. It was good. Nothing. Just chilled. You're like Austin Powers, international man of mystery. I'll take that. Do you have a really hairy chest?

No. Do you have mojo? You know, he's got mojo. It's been a while. It's been a while. It's been a while since I watched the movie. And then you lose your mojo. That's right. Dr. Evil sucks it out of you, Johnson. I'm Dr. Evil. Oh, wait. No, been a while since I watched the movie. And then you lose your mojo. That's right.

Dr. Evil sucks it out of you, Johnson. I'm Dr. Evil. Oh, wait. No, no, no. No. No. I didn't listen to what you said properly. I just thought it was funny.

Radio 101, Ducko, always be listening. Timing was impeccable for that. I just fell into a trap. Wow. And you wonder about your DMs. I wonder why ladies never hit on me. I didn't want

to start that way. What a great great start. See, Tuesday sucked. Stop saying sucked. Babs, good morning to you. How are you going out there? I'm going. I'll see. I'm not leaving, good morning to you. How are you going out there? I'm going. I'll see.

I'm not leaving, but it's going. Guys, my back's already hurting having to carry the vibe for today. We're going to need to have a key change. The team is flying. Let's go. It's only week two. How good is that, hey? Of 2023. You know, it's like an old marriage we've all slipped into, isn't it?

Week two. It's gotten a bit too comfortable. Hasn't it? A all slipped into, isn't it? We do. It's gotten a bit too comfortable. A bit too. Hasn't it? Where's the spice? Where's the romance? Come on. We've been peeing with the door open for too long.

Yeah, we have. Come on. We do have 10k Alphabucks, though. 6.38. That could spice it up. I love that. What else we got today? Year of the Song today.

We love Year of the Song. Shy Guy, what's the theme? Oh, yeah. Songs with alarms in them. Sound the alarm. That's right. We love year of the song. Shy Guy, what's the theme? Oh, yeah. Songs with alarms in them. Sound the alarm. That's right. We had this exact conversation yesterday. We've also got the CoFOD. Oh, yes.

Call the fame of the day. You don't have to wait till Friday to win a great prize. We're going to draw it every morning at nine. Yep. 250 bucks to spend at Officeworks. You said Officeworks? I said Officeworks. Wow, that's fantastic. Get the kids ready to go back to school. Absolutely. Pick yourself up some new pens.

Oh, yeah. Highlighters. If you want a nice pen, you know I'm a celebrant, and I have to obviously get people to sign some official documents. Do you use an ink pen, like an inkwell? I'm currently just using a... A Bic? No, like a, what's it, like a promotional pen for the Regal Inn in Tanabas. Oh, yes.

You always grab those. But I really want to get a nice pen. Mate, upwards of $60, some nice pens. Does it feel nice to write on it? Yeah, it does. You know how Officeworks has that pad of paper? You can test your pen out. Penises everywhere.

It feels beautiful. Stop bringing up. Yes. What's on your mind today? That is what every dude will draw when they see a pad. Officeworks is family friendly. Don't you be graffitiing. Dictation. But yeah, upwards of $60.

If you're in the market for some nice pens, get involved in the show. You win that money to spend at Office Works. I'm not allowed to write with nice pens. I'm just too messy. I'm too messy. It would not be worth it. Do you remember signing your marriage certificate? Were you very conscient? I do remember seeing that. I was nervous

for the signature. Oh my god. And you're lefty. You're probably going to smudge it. We're both left. Oh, I do remember seeing that. Sorry. I wasn't nervous for the signature. Oh, my God. And you're lefty. You're probably going to smudge it. Well, we're both left. Morgan and I are both left. At least they're both smudged. Yeah, they're both smudged. No one can read them.

Yes. Lucia, my one-year-old, is showing signs that she might be left-handed. Always picks up food with her left hand. Throws the ball with her left hand. My dad, the other day, wrenched something out of her hand and tried to shove it in her right hand. I went, Dad, just watch with people that do that. It's so archaic. I don't know. It's very

Catholic. Yeah, it is. You know that? They used to punish you. My brother-in-law tried to do as well to their son who's now left-handed. It didn't work. I don't know what the big deal is. I know we have a bit of a laugh about it. He was telling me, I was like, I am left-handed. It is okay. My dad got really weird about it. Yeah, some people do.

They get funny-ass about it. Yeah. Anyway. I hope Lucia is on our side. Yeah, you're left-handed. I forget you're a lefty too. Yeah, me too. I think every producer we've ever had left-handed.

I think so. Yeah, yeah. That's why none of them can run on the whiteboard. That's right. Babs clearly right-handed. Beautiful hand-run. We do. Lefties, horrible teachers.

Can't run on whiteboards if they still do that in class anymore. Up next, though, we need to tell you about something happening in Japan. We're ducking over Japan. You know, we're big with the Tokyo audience. Absolutely. The Tokyo Times loves us. You educated us about the Shibuya Crossing the other day. The Shibuya Crossing's fantastic.

Why are we going to Japan next, Ducco? Well, something's happening with the old people. They're sick of being lonely, and they're doing something to take the loneliness back. Oh, okay. I think we can learn from it. Oh, all right. We'll unpack lonely Japanese people after Sunday. What a way to start Tuesday.

Tuesday! Jess and Ducco. Jess and Ducco. Right now, let's duck off to Tokyo. Been a while. It's wonderful to be here. Been a while a while. It's wonderful to be here. Been a while between ramens. It is good to be here, you know.

Hit me with some korage chicken. That's all you'll be eating for the next couple of days. That's all I'll be eating. I don't want any of your seafood. Keep your seaweeds away from me. And tempura can get in the bin. I actually don't know if you'd vibe Japan that much, if I'm being honest. No, no.

I'm scared of tech. I don't love the food. It's cute. Yeah, yeah.'m being honest. No, no. I'm scared of tech. I don't love the food. Yeah, yeah. You'd tower over them, too. They're way too advanced in Japan. They are doing some... Hey, everything's fast and moving quick. I did like Tokyo Drift.

It was the worst of the Fast and the Furious. It was horrible. But I do like that movie. Yeah. So maybe that's the only thing getting me there. How about this, though? Japanese elders are so fed up with being old, the conditions they have to live in, being lonely,

not getting much support, that they are intentionally trying to get themselves to go to jail so they can live in jail rather than live in society. Wow. Just for some companionship. Companionship, but also... Japan's one of those countries where they do live well... In jail.

I meant well old, but that sentence doesn't make sense. They do live pretty old. Pretty old, yeah. The majority of the time. Because, I mean, they're just on rice fields walking around, just cruising. Yeah, yeah. I'm pretty sure they were somewhere in Japan was featured on that Blue Zones doco. All that doco said is if you own a donkey and you walk up mountains, you will live old.

And eat beans. And eat beans. Yeah, beans and rice. You'll live for ages. I think there was somewhere in Japan. Yes, there was. And I thought Japan was one beans and rice. You'll live for ages. I think there was somewhere in Japan. Yes, there was. And I thought Japan was one of those cultures where they look after their elderly. So maybe you bring the grandparents, even the grandparents, into the home.

Oh, yeah. But if they're lonely, maybe that's shifting with the modern times. In the Japanese prisons, though, you get regular meals, free health care and elder care, along with the companionship that they lack outside. Oh, my God. Well, you're a force with a roommate. Well, that's it. You have to get along.

If your roommate is an actual hardened criminal, you just get stuck with one of these old people who did some petty crime. Yeah, yeah. Not like, oh, I'm in here with a murderer. Yeah, someone's actually murdered someone. That would be an unlucky, you know, Julie's walked in, Julie's 85 thinking, here I am in the home. Your knowledge of Japanese names.

I know, I know. And then she's got it with Aoko. That's a bit better. That's better. Because I was in the home. Your knowledge of Japanese names. I know. Just. I know. And then she's got it with Aoko. That's a bit better. That's better. Who's actually a hardened criminal. Julie's like, I just wanted a friend. Yeah, I shouldn't have come to this Japanese prison. I just stole batteries.

I'm Julie, by the way. What's the health care like? When's the dentist come? How's this? They're so polite over there. They're offering to pay 20 or 30,000 yen in order to go to prison for a month or two. Like a hotel stay. Like $130 to $190 a month.

They'll pay per month just to stay there. Surely there are villages. What's like the retirement village situation in Japan? I don't know. Maybe it's more expensive or it's harder to get into. Surely jail isn't the first option. How's this though? Yoko tried to go, didn't get let in for

shoplifting, so she's been imprisoned on drug charges five times. Oh my god, she's had to level up. Shoplifting wasn't enough. We've got a drug ratty. She's found out where to get something and she's like, look, I've got drugs. Bang, off she goes. She's looking for the undercover cop. Are you an undercover cop? Are you an undercover cop? Yoko, we're going to let you go.

That's sad. It is kind of sad. It's a cry for help. They're doing it on purpose to get Looking for the undercover cop. Are you an undercover cop? Are you an undercover cop? Yoko, we're going to let you go. That sucks. It is kind of sad. It's a cry for help. They're doing it on purpose to get into prison. They want to come. The number of prisoners aged 65 or older has quadrupled from 2003 to 2024. Wow. And now they've got a real problem where all the inmates in the,

this is the National Tokyo's Women's Prison, they're all too old. That's why you said Julie. Yeah, yeah. They're all too old. Yeah, that's why I said Julie. Thank, yeah. They're all too old. Yeah, that's why I said Julie. Thank you. See? It all makes sense.

I was wondering why when your brain, just maybe very sexist to me, didn't go to a man for a criminal. The women's prison. Because it's the women's prison. I'm sure it's the same with men as well. Ladies, what I'm hearing is there's an opportunity here. Instead of you all just going to prison, start a group. Crochet.

They could do something more basic. Bowls. Mahjong. I don't know if they. They could do something more basic. Bowls. Mahjong. I don't know if they do bowls in Japan. Obviously, they probably do. They don't have bolos, though. They don't have bolos. They're not going to rock up to a bolo.

What I'm hearing is gap in the market. I see. Julie. Julie. How about we make some sort of place where everyone can get together? We could. Anyway, so, you know. Don't just become drug dealers for the sake of a friend.

Jess and Daco. No, I don drug dealers for the sake of a friend. Jess and Daco. No, I don't think so. It's a no. I don't like it. I don't like it. Uh-oh. Shy Guy's Drinks. We have been moving this thing around the board,

trying to find its permanent time home. We've been workshopping with how it's delivered. Yep. But the one thing we haven't changed is who delivers it. And that's the shy guy. And that's what we can't change. We can't change that. We have asked multiple times. How about we crank up the gusto?

One. Two notches. Change the delivery. Sell it to me. Do you even like this I asked him yesterday? Because it sounds like you don't. Oh, you said yeah, it's fine. So anyway, shy guy drags. Don't overthink it, Jess. I'm going to punch. We get so much content on the show, Shy Guy's got leftover bits, and we go through a couple of them and see what we like

and what we don't like to do. Now, I believe today we're changing how we're doing. Slightly, yeah. I'm just going to give you a couple of headlines. Yes. You have to pick one. Ooh, and we can expand on one. Okay.

Okay, all right. This feels good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I've got actors who used prosthetics and who didn't in movies, scenes and stuff. As in like sex scenes? Just in nude scenes. Not necessarily sex scenes. See, the key there was the nude scene.

I think it was. Otherwise, I don't care about Mel Gibson's prosthetic nose. No, yeah, we're talking. I know Nicole won an Oscar when she wore her nose. We're talking bits. Okay, bits. Yeah, you didn't say that. Yeah, but they have nude scenes.

But you need to sell us this headline because we're picking. Because I thought it was, yeah, noses and ears. I know that they weren't Orlando's ears in Water of the Rings. They weren't? Anyway, that's headline one. That's one. One, one, one, okay. Medical facts you didn't know.

I've got a bunch of them here. I can just read them out. Oh, yeah. Oh. That's one. One, one, one, okay. Medical facts you didn't know. I've got a bunch of them here. I can just read them out. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's interesting. And I've got the most common pin numbers and the least common pin numbers. Okay, not that. No. I actually like that one.

What do you mean you like that? Well, because I might read out your pin number. You go, oh, that's quite common. Okay, what's the most common? Oh, no. I think medical facts. Don't you do that. Yeah, medical facts.

This is how he tricks us into doing the ones we don't even want to do. The most common is 7498. Was that your pick number just then? No, no. I thought very hard about it. Or was it? Medical facts. Go!

This is on BuzzFeed, and this is submitted by people. So it doesn't necessarily mean there's any medical backing behind it. Oh, what's that? I'm sorry. Don't leave with that. Duggo, I think the headline Shy Guy shared was medical facts. You didn't know? And now he's just refused.

Let's go to the doctors. This might not be real. Let's do pin numbers. Are there good medical facts in there? All right, here's one. But they might not be facts. Well, this is just submitted by people. So I don't know if they were doctors or not.

Babs, can you cross-check some of these while he's doing it live? All right. All right. The death knell dock toll for this segment. Okay. I don't know what that means. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry.

The Grim Reaper is coming for this segment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay, hit us. If a man falls over and he gets a boner, don't move him because it could be a sign of spinal injury.

As in, like, he falls over. You had a bad fall. Why are you asking questions he doesn't know and we don't even know if they're true? No. Yeah. Why did he? Well, this is from a New York City medic.

Okay. Oh, a medic. Okay. Medic. That's an all right source. So if you fall over and you. A bad fall and if you're erect. It means you've got a a medic. Okay. Medic. That's an all right source. So if you fall over and you... A bad fall and if you're erect... It means you've got a spinal injury.

Spinal injury. That's wild. But the boner isn't attached to the spine. The nerves, though. The nerves. The nerves. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's come from your spine.

Well, if you have spinal injuries, sometimes you can't use it again. You have erectile dysfunction. It's all linked. Yeah, it's all linked. Your bone is connected to your... Backbone. Okay. It's all linked. Yeah, it's all linked. Your bone is connected to your backbone. Okay.

Your stomach gets new lining every few days to prevent it from digesting itself. Oh. That doesn't feel real. Yeah. It could be, though. I mean, now I don't trust anything that's being said. No, exactly. Babs is furiously Googling it, but she can't keep up with the pace.

She's like, boners falling. Stomach lining. Stomach lining. Babs, is that one looking pretty good? Is that real? They're not thinking of the uterus. Use your mind. You're peering that. It was real, yes, but I couldn't find out if the boner one was real.

Okay. She was out there nodding to me and then shaking her head. I was like, use your mind. Come on, team. Let's be better. All right. Here, let's do two more. Two more.

You can live with just one lung. Yes, I did know that. Yeah, yeah. But it's not a pleasant life. I don't believe. You could never take a deep breath. It says it's not the most pleasant existence, but people have made it up to 30 years.

Okay. Don't forbid you need to blow up a balloon. Forget about it. You are not a weapon at kids' parties. No, no. If you're a clown and you have one lung, that's the end of that. You best go to juggling

because you can't be blowing up things. Okay, give us something real good. Oh, that's gross. I don't want to do that one. Okay. Are you editing on the fly? Yeah, yeah. Just, you know.

Once again, this could be the last time we're hearing Shy Guy Drake. We hope not. 048881069. Yes. We'll take some votes. Do you like it or not? Some opinions. Actually, let's do that.

Text the text line right now. Flood it in. If you like it, we keep it. If you don't, we don't. That's right. 048881069. Shy Guy, let's do that. Text the text line right now. Flood it in. If you like it, we keep it. If you don't, we don't. That's right. 0-4-8-8-8-1-0-6-9. Shaga, give us one more. All right.

If you have a rib removed for like a surgery reason or something and you're very, very young, it doesn't say how young, the rib is likely to grow back. Wait a minute. That doesn't feel... That's what it says. That's what it says. I don't think ribs can grow back. Source ABC News. Stop.

I do trust ABC, but... Really? That's what it says. You can grow back a rib? If you're incredibly young. Oh, if you're an infant. It doesn't specify how young. Are you looking that up? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That looks true. What? Rib bones show an unusual capacity to regrow and repair themselves. Oh, we're out of the bed. Even when alive. But it was right, though, and you learned something. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alpha Bucks on hit.

Yeah, giddy up. Let's rip and tear. Let's do it. Let's win some cash. 30 seconds to answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. We have to take your first answer. Can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass.

We come back, of course. If there is time, stepping up today, we have the one and only Christy. Good morning, Christy. Good morning. How are you? Yeah, look, Christy, we're all right. I'm okay. Did you hear that Shy Guy Dregs segment we just did?

Fan, do you like it or not? What do you think about it? Look, I'd be happy to give it a miss. It was interesting. Was it interesting, Chrissy, or does it just feel like Shy Guy might have lied to you for three minutes because he doesn't know if the facts are in fact facts? Look, we did have a lot of text lines come in saying it's terrible radio,

no more. Jerry said sucks. It sucks. Someone said I like it, but it's did have a lot of text lines come in saying it's terrible radio, no more. Jerry said, sucks. It sucks. Someone said, I like it, but it's like watching a train crash. Someone else said, keep it going. And someone gave us baby facts, not being born with kneecaps. So, you know, we're on the fence about it. But that's not about that, Christy.

No, Christy, thank you for your opinion. We're building a case for or against dregs. But what we're doing right now is trying to get you $10,000. Yes, please. What would you like to spend the money on? Look, we need to get a new car, so it would certainly help to go towards that. Okay.

That'd be good. Maybe you should have a little look at Nissan. Oh, yes, the X-Trail. Yes, the X-Trail, because that starts with the letter N, and that's what you're going to work with. Okay. N's a good letter, Christy. Okay.

Yeah, it's a solid letter. All right. You feel good? Okay. Yep, let's do it. All right. Put that key in the ignition. Let's do it.

Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter N, we need you to name something you read. Novel. A country. Nicaragua. An actor. Me and Leeson. A space term.

What was it? A space term. Oh, my God. North Star. A fruit. Nectarine. North Star. A fruit. Nectarine. Something sharp. A needle.

A movie. Notting Hill. You know what? What happens to Notting Hill? You weren't actually bad at the game. No, I mean Nicaragua instead of New Zealand. I know. You were actually pretty good at the game.

No way. But unfortunately, Liam Neeson's Liam Neeson's cousin. Oh, my God. Nicaragua instead of New Zealand. I know, you're actually pretty good at the game. But unfortunately, Liam Neeson's Liam Neeson's cousin. Oh, my God. You got a case of the Tuesdays today. You knew you'd done it then, too. You could have said Nick Cage. Our favourite.

Our favourite. We love Nick Cage. And then a movie. You said it was after the buzzer, Notting Hill. That didn't fall. Everything else was correct and not bad responses. No, they were great. I missed by one last time I played.

How many have I missed this time? Oh, three or four. Yeah, but I mean, you were out of the buzzer. Did you get nine last time, Christy? Yeah. You can tell you're a good player. It's just damn Liam, Leeson. Damn Liam.

It's kind of fun to say. Damn Neham. Damn Neham. You can go away empty-handed. Hunter all suspended in Dota. That is all yours. Oh, that's awesome. Thank you so much, guys. You're very welcome, Chrissy.

Thanks for getting involved in the show, and thanks for your feedback on dregs. Yeah. Jess and Ducco. Hey, just quickly, I really want to dissect with the two boys in the room the phenomenon of the boy look. I know it's a bit of a thing.

It's a bit of a joke, the idea that the man look, the boy look. Oh, sorry. The look as in look for something. I thought you meant like look on our face. No, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought you meant the clothing. Oh, like baggy clothes.

Let me explain for you. We all had a different interpretation of your email last night. We're simple creatures, right? When I said boy look, Babs, did you pick up what I was putting down or did you too have a different interpretation? No, I got what you meant. You got it. Okay.

We're talking about the pink pony club. The idea that men, very, very stereotypical here, have the inability to find things right in front of their faces. Do you suffer from this, Doug? Absolutely. As your wife called you up on it before? I think it's gotten worse as I've gotten older. I don't think I used to be that bad, but now, even yesterday, I was like, where's Pam's

food bowl? Where is it? It was right in front of me. And I was walking her in the house and Morgan's like, it's there. And it's more often than not, not something that's hidden. No. It's not like we're asking. You guys have witchcraft.

Like you put things from places. I don't know how they fit there. So this is why it came up yesterday. Angus and I are trying to be really good in 2025. We're not meal prepping, but we're meal planning. So we're not having to buy takeaway at the last minute because we haven't thought about what's for dinner at six o'clock. It's huge from you.

I know, right? You know how anti I am deciding. So what are you doing? What are you planning? What meals? On a Thursday, we decide what we're going to eat Sunday to Thursday of the following week. It's too much. It's too far in advance. I couldn't agree more. It's a tough time. But it's working all right.

Okay. Just in terms of, all right, Wednesday comes around, we're having tacos. So you might be like, Friday we're going out, Saturday we're doing tacos, Sunday we're doing Friday and Saturday. A bit of a rest. Loosey-goosey. But just the idea, all right, Monday we're having the butter chicken that is in the freezer. Tuesday, Angus, you're up for bolognese.

Okay. Wednesday, whatever. And it seems to be working so far. Right. I think because it is far enough in advance, I've almost forgotten. So it's not like I've just thought about it for a week and I'm over it. It's a nice little surprise. But last night, Angus was in charge of the dinner.

It was his bolognese. He knew. And that means he's in charge of shopping for it. He takes care of it. And he comes over. He's like, I'll start dinner, whatever. I'm sitting on the couch and I'm playing with Lucia doing something. And he storms over and he goes, oh, I didn't buy tomato paste for the bolognese because

we usually have two or three. I can't find any of it. And I went, I'm on the case. And the first thing I find. It's like I'm really there. Have we met? Of course. I storm over to the pantry, fling it open, and it is right in front of him.

It's on top of the canned beans, but it's right there. But he had one of the great comebacks of all time, and I tried to make it a big, like, oh, boys, what's wrong with you? Oh, my God. And I said the line, what would you do without me? And he hit me back with a very succinct, I don't know,

the Bolognese would just be a bit thin. I'm like, okay, so it's not that big of a deal for you. So it's not the end of the world. Really trying to make mountains out of molehills in my family. And Angus went, it's not that big of a deal. It doesn't really matter that much. Sit back down, young lady. I don't know what it is.

It's like when you know, it's like you know that, like for me, I know Morgan knows where it is and I don't. It's almost like you don't need to use your brain for that. It's like, oh, I've got 50, Angus especially, 25 things on his to-do list before 9am most days, let alone what else is going on. So knowing and looking for tomato paste, it's not high up on the agenda. It's just easy to go, where is it?

Rather than me going and looking. And me trying to make it like I've saved the day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not really working for it. How was the bolognese though? It was really good and thick. Jump on. Otherwise, 0488881069, still getting a lot of feedback about Shy Guy's dreg stucco.

People wanting to see it stay. A couple of people like it. But a lot of people saying put it in the bin. Or to use a Shy Guy-anism, bone it. Bone it, yeah. Right now, how's this out of the Australian Reptile Park? This is a story from last week, I believe. A gigantic funnel web spider. Record breaking

Yes, I saw this. Out of Newcastle. Now, I love this little line. Newcastle is a particular area where we tend to get a lot of large boys, spiders, likely due to the genetics in the area being very big. So, Novacastrians, well done to you. Hang on a minute. Couple of big hitters. She might be talking about spiders, but you could take that and run with it, I believe. Yeah.

Anyway, this was captured by- Well, as in Newcastle's home to lots of big spiders. Yeah, the genetics in the area being pretty big. Really? This is a woman from the Australian Reptile Park. I wonder why. I wonder why. Head spider keeper, Emma.

Oh, Emma. You should have said that. She knows what's up. Yeah. But it was captured by a civilian and donated to the reptile park because they do their amazing anti-venom work. Yes. And they thought, well, this big boy's going to be, hopefully it's not all for show, and

he actually has some good venom. Hopefully he can do something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's doing great stuff. He could be a grower. He could be a shower. He could be a grower or a shower. Let me give you some stats.

The previous record holder for biggest funnel web at the Australian Reptile Park, his name was Hercules, and he was 7.9 centimetres long. This big boy blows him out of the water 9.2 centimetres foot to foot. Wow. Emma, the head spider keeper, she said he is pretty much perfection in spider form. So we thought it was only fitting to name him the spider after perfection in spider form. So we thought it was only fitting to name him, the spider, after perfection in human form, hence his name, Hemsworth. Oh, they've called him Chris.

Well, they've called him Hemsworth. And now people are saying, are you trying to give it an ode to Liam as well? And maybe even the lesser known Luke? Why don't you just call him Chris? Yeah, Chris Hemsworth. Or call him Thor. Or call him Thor. Yeah, that's yeah. Why don't you just call him Chris? Yeah, Chris Hemsworth. Or call him Thor. Or call him Thor. Yeah, that's what they're really going for.

Yeah, wouldn't that be great because the previous record holder was Hercules. Yeah. And now we've got Thor. Oh, that would be good. But no, they've called him Hemsworth because, yeah, I think Emma's got a crush on Chris. Yeah. We've yet to have a comment from Chris. Okay.

But what an honour to have the biggest spider at the reptile park named after you. Not as good as this, Ducko. Someone got in touch. Sky on the Jess and Ducko Instagram. We asked, do you have something named after you? And she said, I'm a volunteer koala rescuer. Okay. And I responded to rescue a koala with suspected chlamydia that was hanging out in a cemetery.

Oh, no. What a call. That's the koala you want to be named after. I really want to highlight volunteer koala. Skye's putting her body on the line. Yeah, someone's going to get Gary out of the cemetery again. She had to wait for hours in the dark to find this koala with chlamydia, hanging out in the dark at a cemetery.

She finally catches her, finds out her name, the koala's name, is also Skye, and she is a geriatric female koala with urinary incontinence and an insatiable appetite. Skye said, I think I found my spirit animal in koala form at a cemetery. So how was the koala named Skye? I don't know, because she rescued it, then they named it Skye? They named it Skye. Yeah, that's got to be what they've done.

She said, I found out it was named Skye. I don't think the koala went, oh, hi, I'm Skye. Yeah, that's got to be what they've done. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She said, I found out it was named Skye. I don't think the koala went, oh, hi, I'm Skye. Yeah, yeah. I was going to say, was it tracked and named? I have no idea. Had they already named it? But it had incontinence and a UTI and chlamydia. We know the UTIs and koalas can get banned.

We do. We do. Macca said, I have a star named after me, but that just sounds like his grandma did something cute for his birthday one time. My mate once got his girlfriend at the time a star. Did the star thing? Oh my God. It is one of the biggest money traps.

So you can buy a star and you get the coordinates and the exact location of the star. And you can say, this is now named Donna. Yep. And hand them a certificate. Babe, I got you a star. This is after you because you're the star in my eye. It's no. And did.

You're the star in my life. Oh, his girlfriend at the time. He would have. She would have loved it. Oh, she fr at the time. He would have loved it. Oh, she frothed it. And every time it's not, we're like, where's your star, mate? Because she said to us, we can see it. We found it.

It's near Orion's Belt. I was like, shut up. You don't know where that is. Would you rather have a star named after you or a stretch of highway? You know, you can adopt a highway. At least you can see the highway. At least you can pretend to. I think my star's that one.

It's that one. Recepos. Yeah. Receptionists. Do receptionists like to be called Recepos? I don't think so. It doesn't feel good coming out of my mouth. I apologize.

It feels like... It feels like... I don't know. It feels rude to them, but it's not. It does. I've tried to nickname receptionists, but maybe that's... Recepos. Come across as drug or treatment. I apologize. I've tried to nickname receptionists, but maybe that's... Receptos. Come across as drug or treatment.

I apologize. Receptionists, what have you seen? You are the front line for your business, whatever industry it may be, but you're not the one maybe seeing the client. They've come to have their appointment with whoever, but you're the one who has to deal with them before or after. For me, what comes to mind, I once called, you know, those therapists on the phone?

Yeah. I was in a bit of a spiral. I called one of the therapists on the phone. Yeah. You know, the work ones? It's like, get three free counselling services. I think it was COVID time. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I called. Sorry, I shouldn't laugh. I just didn't. You just don't take me for that kind of. No, it was dark. Yeah. So I've called and I was, it was a low spot for laugh. I just didn't. You just don't take me for that kind of. No, it was dark. Yeah. So I've called and it was a low. I'm sorry.

I don't know why I'm laughing. It was low. Yeah, yeah. And I'm just. Is this real? Yeah, the woman answered, lovely, soft-tempered woman, mild-mannered, and I've launched into what I was feeling and how terrible life was and I needed help.

And she went, thank you so much for sharing. I'm now going to connect you with the therapist. I was mortified. I could see you doing that and you had gone on for minutes. And you should have seen my mum didn't get me as many Christmas presents as you because I have a daughter now. I was mortified. That is so funny.

But she was so professional about it. And my issue is, I don't think they have attorney-client privilege. What's that called? Yeah, I don't think that. Confidentiality. Confidentiality. She's the recepo. So she's probably gone off and told everyone about this crazy radio.

Because I launched into, I'm a radio host and this and this. And I was very detailed. I reckon I spoke for three minutes without taking a breath. She went, I'll just patch you through. Oh, no. Anyway, but that's not the story I want to tell. And then did you retell it with such gusto to the real person? No, because then I felt so ashamed.

And she sort of went, are you okay? Like, do you even have a problem? Can you go into a bit more detail? Do you even have a problem? Is everything all right with you? She was like, why are you holding back? And I went, I've already told your colleague. I've told her everything.

Sweet. No, but that's not the story I wanted to share. Okay. I'm glad you did that. We were having some drinks. We were having some drinks the other day. And I think one of the guy's partners is a medical receptionist. She wasn't there.

But I made the comment like, oh, she would have seen some stuff. Just thinking, you know, illness and people coming in maybe when they should have gone to the hospital. And he went, oh, the best time was an elderly bloke who had to give a stool sample. Now, we're all familiar with the little thing they give you, the little specimen jar. And apparently he had been given that at Standard Protocol and he'd left, used the bathroom at the doctor's. He'd done it then and there. On-site stool. That's tough as well because it's really tough navigating that little cup. But you know, what do they usually give you? I know you've done samples in your life. For the

cup, they put it in a little paper bag usually, yeah? Yes, yes. So it's not see-through. It feels a bit more discreet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's walked back out just with the bag and tried to hand it over the desk. And the medical receptionist, this guy's girlfriend, went, ah, where's the cup? And he went, I didn't know what that was for.

I thought the bag. Well, the bag, to be fair, can fit more in it. You can get the full sample. Here you go. Enjoy this. And now all I was asking this bloke, he went, I don't know. Stop asking me questions. Was, has he hovered himself over the bag?

Has he had to, did he use the cup as the scoop or whatever? You're asking this guy how the old guy did it. You've brought out this story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway. Oh, that's gross. So that was a medical receptionist. Oh, they would see some things.

Absolutely. Mine was obviously a, I don't know, on-call therapy receptionist. You know, when I had to do my IVF stuff, the nurses and the receptionists that would see when you have to go and do your business at the clinic, when you've got to go and shoot your shot. And then they look at it in front of you and then they've got to weigh it. I didn't think they were nurses per se. I thought they were just employed to demand reception. But could they be?

They could be both. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you're a nurse, sure, that's your bread and butter. Yes, that's what you do. That's what you do. But if you're just paying, you know, you're getting paid your contracted salary. Yeah, and you're just like, what am I dealing with today? What am I dealing with today?

What's being handed over the desk? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wild sense. Okay. So what, you want to do 13, 10, 60 receptionists? Receptionists. What have you seen? Because you're the front line.

You're the front line. That's it. You're having to deal with a lot more than I think you get credit for, and we'd like to celebrate that right now. Yeah. I really want to get audio of your call. It was not a high point for me, Ducko. That call of fame prize was up for grabs as well.

So the co-fob we're drawing today before nine. So get involved. We'll get you on next. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. We're calling all receptionists out there. No'll get you on there. We're calling all receptionists out there. No matter where you're a receptionist for, it doesn't matter. Yeah, whatever the industry.

Whatever the industry. What have you seen? Because we appreciate you are the first line of defence. You know, people might be coming for an appointment with whoever, whatever the job may be, but you're the one who has to deal with them either side. You've probably seen some stuff. A friend of ours sharing that his partner is a medical receptionist and she's had to deal with bodily fluids being handed to her in bags,

even though specimen cups and all that jazz are given. And what do you even say then? You can't be rude. Oh, sir, you're meant to use the little jar. And, like, obviously the training and all that goes with it, but she's not a nurse, you know. She's not a doctor herself. She's just doing a job nine to five to pay the bills.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? She doesn't get paid enough to do that. She gets her four weeks leave a year. That's right. Yeah. Like the lady on the end of my phone call, the receptionist who had to deal with me dumping my trauma on her before she went, I'll just transfer you through to the council.

Just word vomited to her. Got a little out there. I feel bad. Like, that's OH&S. Surely she's got to have skills to deal with that. Yeah, she's not allowed to. I can't be the first person to have thought she was the therapist and just launch in.

She said, how can I help you? She shouldn't have said, how can I help you? I feel like that's the place where she should start. How can I help you? What's up today? I'm not the therapist. What do you need? Yeah.

Anyway, Colette called through. Hello, Colette. Good morning. You worked for a chiropractor. Yes, I used to work for a chiropractor. And, you know, we would be in the back room waiting for the patient to be finished, to, you know, serve them at the front desk. And we'd walk past and the next minute we just hear this loud.

As in they were in their appointment getting cracked? Yeah, so like obviously when, you know, you're pressed down on things. Yes. So things come out. It releases like gases. That's a very farty industry. You're having to deal with the back end of that part of the park. And then they'd come to the front, they'd come to the reception

and they're like, I'm never coming back. And they'd never come back. You've lost me as a client. You've heard some things that you shouldn't hear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't even think about that at the time. Yeah. That's funny.

Oh, that's great. Lucy, good morning to you. Hi. You used to work at a vet. I did. So I worked at a vet when I was about 36 weeks pregnant, just as the receptionist. And someone brought in their dog just for a normal procedure,

and they asked to use the toilet themselves. So they went in there. They were in there for a while. Their partner even came in to ask where they were, and I said, oh, they're just using the bathroom. Anyway, when they came out, they said, oh, I'd made a little mess, I tried to clean it. And when I went in after, there was diarrhea all over the wall, all over the floor, all over the toilet. And me being the receptionist had to

clean it at 36 weeks pregnant. You can't be touching feces at 36 weeks pregnant. Not a chance. Did you do it? I did. I did. I had to. Sorry, did you say that the customer had said, I've tried to clean it?

I tried to clean it. Had they just made it worse? I tried to clean, but it was not. Did you go and see, like, were they still there when you saw it was on the walls? They were not. They left pretty quickly. I would love to know how that happened. How do you get it on the walls? How do you get it on the walls? I don't know.

Don't be doing a handstand while you're having intestinal issues. Is that just like you're just getting up and it's just spewing out everywhere and you're like, ah! Oh, like a loose hose. Yeah, exactly like that. We've had some bad things happen in these toilets at works.

Doesn't Babs know about it? Doesn't she, Chugs? Very similar situation. Send Lucy back to Babs so they can have a little support group. Jess and Ducko. Year of the songs. Shy Guy's going to give us some songs. Yeah. We're going to tell him what year they were released.

He's told us the theme is alarms. Songs with alarms in them. Why? Because I thought of it. For no reason, mate. I just thought of this last year. Didn't put it in his back pocket. Then we had to do Christmas songs because it was our last week.

So I thought that was more appropriate. And he was looking forward to this all off-season. I really was. Did your alarm go off one morning and you went, alarms! Yeah. It's a great thing. This is Riri. Did your alarm go off one morning and you went, Alarm! Yeah. It's a great thing. This is Ring Ring. This is Ring Ring.

Shut up and drive. What's it called? Shut up and drive. Is it that or is it? What's this got to do with alarms? It's in the song. The alarm. Mate, this is going to be deep cut references.

No, only because you think it is. The alarm is in the song. Well, he can't think of any other way. In all the songs you hear In this scene There is an alarm sound effect Oh a sound effect So they're not saying alarm No they're not saying alarm

So we're not going to get Pound the alarm Is there Yeah there is an alarm Hold on hold on Is there an alarm sound effect in this Yes Play again

Where Where I think that's a drum Where? There. Where? I think that's a drum. No, it's there. Anyway, year of this song, I don't know. I can faintly hear something in there. Oh, don't you support him.

What is this song year? What a laugh. I don't know. Oh, no, what are we doing here? Yeah, we're going to play the game. What song year is this? It's got to be After Ponder Replay because that was her first. I don't know enough about...

She hasn't released new music in a while. She popped out a couple of kids. Shut Up and Drive, I'm going to say, is earlier than you think it is. And I'm going to go with... Ooh. Ooh. All right, Duckers in 2017. Jess, 08.

The correct answer is... Not yet. Oh, my goodness. You're having a day today. No. What is happening? Do you have the answer when the song is released? Glad we can keep listening to Rihanna. It's 2007.

Oh. So Jess. Yes, just over. Ah, damn. Next one. We got it. Now that's an alarm. Did you hear the alarms in that one?

I think you're going to have to get on to Rihanna's people or Rihanna herself. It's in the song. I'm telling you. So Pound the Alarm. Pound the Alarm. Pound the Alarm. What year do you think that came out in? This is Minaj, yeah?

This is Minaj. Oh, I have no idea when this came out. I can't tell you much about Nicki Minaj. Is this before? What's her other big one? I think she's from Trinidad and Tobago. tell you much about Nicki Minaj. Is this before? What's her other big one? I think she's from Trinidad and Tobago. That's my one Nicki fact. Is that Rihanna?

No, that's Barbados. That's on me. Do you know what? I've never heard the verses to this song. I've only known the chorus. What the hell is this? I have no idea when this song... It's got to be early because it's trashy.

Like, it's got to be... See, I reckon it's after Riri and that was 2007. Oh, here we go. Build it, it's got to be. See, I reckon it's after Riri, and that was 2007. Oh, here we go. Build it, Nicky. Oh, it might end. Oh, I'm in. All right. Doug in 2011.

Jess in 2010, that is. Yep. No, the correct answer is 2012. Oh, closest lap going. Yes, I got one. That's a point. Okay, next song. It's clear as day, that alarm. Oh, Cluster Slap going on. Yes, I got one. Okay, next song. It's clear as day, that alarm.

Oh, track. They're delicious. This is London Bridge. I think there was controversy with this because in the film clip, she was in front of Tower Bridge, which is the more iconic of the bridges, and people were like, you don't even know your bridges. You don't know your bridges, right. If you're going to do a song called London Bridge,

at least be in front of the London Bridge. 100%. Yeah. And I get it. Tower, tower, tower, bridge. Doesn't really work. Doesn't really work.

Does it? No. Jeez, Fergie. Was this solo to Black Eyed Peas? Yeah. Okay. You know, Will.i.am came out recently being like, Fergie was never part of the band. She was just a female vocalist.

And she was like, rude. Oh, really? On the cover of albums. Yeah. They must have had a split. Oh, really? I was on the cover of albums. Yeah. They must have had a splash. Yeah, I think they had a little split. London Bridge. I think this is the same album of Glamorous.

Was this the code for when the Queen died? London Bridge has fallen? Is that the code? I think that's a movie with... I think it was Tower. With Gerard Butler. Yes, it is. I love that movie.

Of course you do. Yes. Oh, no. London is falling. London is falling. Close enough. All right, we've got to get that movie. Of course you do. Oh, no. London is falling. London is falling. Close enough. All right, we've got to give it a year. It's London Bridge is Down.

Yeah. What's the code for when Chuck dies? Oh, I did hear someone tell me so. It's a tower bridge is down. He's Operation... Palace? Manai Bridge. Oh, yeah, okay.

All right, I'm going to go with... I don't know. I have no idea. Neither do I. All right, 2013 for Jess, 2008 for Ducko. The correct answer, okay. All right, I'm going to go with, I don't know, I have no idea. Neither do I. All right, 2013 for Jess, 2008 for Ducker. The correct answer, 2006. Oh, wow. No one got that.

Okay, next one. Mystique. Scandalous. Now that's an alarm. Oh, man, I don't know any of these. I can't attach a memory to any of these songs. When do you think this was out? This could be a banger.

This is a great song. Really? Yep. Mystique, Scandalous. It's earlier than you reckon. It's earlier than you think, I think. Yeah, I agree. I think this is...

Ooh, we've gone really early. Ducco's in it in 2006. Jess is in 2002. The correct answer is 2003. Oh, yes! Jess gets the point, which means we go to a tiebreaker. Oh, you can't write this stuff! Last one.

Pussycat dolls. Where'd I grow up? It's there, don't question it. Where's the alarm in this? Anne-Marie, 2002. Pussycat Dolls. What's the song called? When I Grow Up.

Of course. I don't know what you think an alarm is. Okay, you know what? That's why you sleep in. Over the four minutes of the song. Oh, yeah. It's in there. You just didn't put it in the grammar.

Then you wouldn't know what the song is. That's going to be the hook. When was the PCDs when you were up? Thank you, Beth, at the very beginning. PCDs? Jeez, when were the Pussycat Dolls big? I don't know. Shirtsingers going back to Broadway.

It's a fun fact. I can't tell you anything about it. I can't connect to any of these songs. Do you remember Melody? No. Jess? None. I think there might have been a Claire in there.

Oh, jeez. When I grow up, I'm going to say, oh, man. I love this song. I don't know if this is like pre-high school. No, I reckon you're in high school. Ashley, Kimberly, Robin, Nicole, Melody and... Jess. Yes.

Thank you. No Claire. Pussycat Dolls. Okay. I'm going to say... See, this was Buttons area. I reckon it was after Don't Ya, which was their breakout hit. I'm saying 05.

Oh, crap. Wait. All right. I'm saying 07 was their breakout hit. I'm saying 05. Oh, crap. Wait. All right. I'm saying 07. Okay. Ducco's in 05. Jess in 07. For the win.

This is the top. For the win. The answer is 2008. Yes! Jess wins the game. She takes it. She gets it. What's the cap dollars?

Year 11 Jess really enjoyed a bit of PCD. Good win. Good get. Thank you so much. Great alarm song. Great alarm song. They're all there. Fact checkD. Good win. Good get. Thank you so much. Great alarm songs. Great alarm songs. They're all there. Fact check it.

Jess and Ducco. We're all a big fan of the coffee, coffee, coffee. That's what we teachy teachy. Amen, we are. Big fans of the bean. Big fan of the bean. Love the coffee. I've been a new article doing the rounds right now because coffee's getting, you know what's

funny? I don't, I can't even tell you the average price now for, say, a small coffee. Oh, my God. Because like women's clothing sizes, everyone runs their own race. Sizes are all different. It is made up. It is. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I paid, I like cold brew. You know, I like my cold brew. I think I paid $7.50 the other day. That's ridiculous. I couldn't. And it was before I'd had my coffee. But even some places. I couldn't grapple with it.

You get like a small, like a throw down small. It's like $4.50 to get a flat wine or whatever it may be, a cappuccino, whatever you might be getting. Well, the Australian Restaurant and Cafe Association have come out today and warned that the cost of a coffee could reach double digits in some cities due to the high price of beans by the end of the year. You could be paying $10. For a small latte?

For a takeaway coffee by the end of the year. You could be paying $10 for a small latte. For a takeaway coffee by the end of the year. Oh, my God. 7-Eleven are licking their lips being like, we're going to have a monopoly on coffee if we keep our dollar coffee. And you know what? It's not that bad. At 7-Eleven. Like, from that machine you get.

Like, if you know it's a dollar, like, and you're on a road trip. True. Are you telling me my brain can overlook the. Yeah, when you know, because the machine's okay. Yep. Suppliers and industry experts agree that the price has to go up because they're not making any money because the beans are starting to cost so much. Cost of living.

Everything's expensive. Of course. Beans are going up by $8 a bag in six months. Wow. And obviously, you want to respect the growers. If we're getting our beans from your Kenyas, your Columbias, wherever, if their prices go up, well, the consumer gets hit with it at the other end. The Kenyan beans going up.

It's going to be more expensive here. It's going to be more expensive.. It's going to be more expensive. Thus, my flat white becoming $10. Would you pay $10 for a coffee? Not a small coffee. I don't think I could justify that. That's, well, I was going to say it's a schooner of beer territory, but now beer's like $18, so it's pretty hard to.

Yes. They're now saying they're trying to liken getting a coffee to getting a meal out. Like, you can make it at home for cheaper, but you come for the experience, which I also understand. We do love someone, a barista who's properly trained, doing that for us. We did that study last year, whereas if you walk with a takeaway coffee, you look more powerful.

And you feel powerful. You feel more confident. So are people going to start, all right, I'll go out for breakfast with you, but I'm going to bring my own coffee. So they rock up with a water bottle, but in fact, that's their Piccolo in their water bottle or something.

Or their Keep Cup. But then with the Keep Cup thing, do they bill you for that as like a small, a medium, you know? Yes, yes. It's a slippery slope. Some places, it won't be all places that go up to $10. Some might be a small flat white, could be $7 by the end of the year. Yep.

But either way, everywhere's going to go up just for a small coffee. I mean, God forbid you get your grande. Oh, God forbid you want one of your alternative milks. They're usually 50 cents extra. They are, aren't they? Oh, you want a macadamia milk? That's going to start. I'd rather pay more for alternative milks.

This is coming from me as a long black drinker. Keep me beans precious. Yeah. Charge me extra for the superfluous stuff around it. Like your breakfast or your fancy milks. 27,000 cafes across the country are facing down and tough conditions, not making money. So now we're talking about the impact on small business.

Yeah. All comes back to the bean. It does. It'd be interesting to chat to someone who owns a cafe or a barista to see what they make per coffee. Yeah. What the markup is. What's the markup on coffee?

Yeah. Or is it one of those things you can mark it up because people are willing to pay? Yes, that's true. So your coffee can absorb because people maybe would forego the meal, but I must have the coffee. The coffee is the meal now. The coffee is the meal. Yeah.

You know what you can buy a lot with? $10,000, coffees. Coffees. You know, you win Alpha Bucks, you can get small flat whites for at least a good couple of months. A good couple of months. $13,000, $10,000, $16,000. Yeah. Would you like to play Alpha Bucks? We need months. A good couple of months. $13,060. Yeah.

Would you like to play Alpha Bucks? We need you. We need you. Well, actually, you need us. Well, the best we've done so far is eight. Yeah, we're getting there. So we're upholding our end of the bargain. Yeah.

Providing you with one letter and ten questions. What you need to do is lift. You've got to lift. What a song. Should have played Nulzy. Thank you, Shannon. There's no alarm in that song. Throwback to Year of the Song.

Throwback to Year of the Song, 10 minutes ago. Hey, 13, 10, 60. Give us a call. Play Alphabucks with you, Ned. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alphabucks on it. Well, we're playing for $10,000. The stakes couldn't be higher.

30 seconds to answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. Have to take your first answer. You can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. We'll come back to you, of course, if there is time. Today's player is James. Hello, James. Hey, guys.

How's it going? James, we are excellent. We're so excited at the idea of giving you $10,000. Be nice. For a Tuesday. What do you want to spend the money on? Probably some bills and maybe a bit of a holiday with some mates. Oh, yeah.

Oh, with some mates. With some friends. Love that. Would you consider Fiji a holiday destination, James. Or maybe France or Finland. Maybe. Maybe. Well, you should because they all start with F. Possibly.

Have you heard of Bali? Bali doesn't start with F. The letter's F. I know. It's just in James' head. James wasn't picking up what I was putting down. No, he wasn't. Those are all places that start with F.

Yes. And that's what you're going to work with, James wasn't picking up what I was putting down. No, he wasn't. Those are all places I started with F. Yes. And that's what you're going to work with, James? Righto. Does that feel good? I'm feeling kind of confident. There we go. He is. I think James is a confident player.

Yeah, he's quietly confident, isn't he? Okay. James, let's lock and load. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter F, we need you to name something you'd find in your living room. A form of transport. A fabric.

A cartoon character. A kitchen item. A horror movie. A kitchen item. Pork. A horror movie. Right over for you. A breakfast food. Fruit loops. An occupation. Flight attendant.

A baking ingredient. Pardon? A baking ingredient. A baking ingredient after the buzz there. You got yourself six. I could tell James was a good player. He was a good player. Calculated with his passes as well.

Fabric, James, could have been felt. A cartoon character, Fred Flintstone. That was Fiona from Shrek. That's a tough one, though. Cartoon characters are a tough get in the moment, I think. A niche one. And everything else was correct except for baking ingredient greeting I'm sure you would have said flour

That would have come out That would have come out Look you don't go empty handed it's not for $10,000 But you do get $100 suspended in DOTA So maybe you can take the boys to in DOTA Ooh spa day Thank you You're welcome

James is like I'm going to get on with my day. Well, that sucked. I'm out of here. Facials for the boys. Facials for the lads. All right, James, you enjoy that. We do play again 6.30 and 8 tomorrow. Jess and Ducco.

13, 10, 6. You're asking, how far did you go for the cravings? You've already had the bed, Kem. You've got the baby coming. And now you've got the cravings, okay? That's right. And you just don't know when a craving will strike. No idea.

If you don't have that thing in the house, how am I going to satisfy this craving? And you never have it in the house because they don't want anything that's in the house. Exactly. Now, this could be how far maybe your hubby went to get it. It could be how far you went to get specific item. Yep, yep. What you had to do. This was the other night in our household.

It was about 8.30 p.m. Okay. You're winding down? Yeah. Was it a school night? Well, it was actually, it was when we were in our last week of holidays. Okay, okay. So it was like, but it was a Friday night, but still trying to get into the zone.

Yeah. You know, trying to get ready to get up the next week. All your jobs are done for the day. Yes. We're settling in. We'd had dinner, obviously. We're watching something on the couch and Morgan's a bit, you know, she's pregnant. She's 27 weeks now.

She's sort of a bit uncomfortable and huffy and whatever. And then she's like, I really, I really feel like a baked good. At 8.30? Yeah. I feel like a baked good. And we had nothing in the house. We had no like muffins or cookies or cake in the house. My brain went to croissant.

I'm like, you got those frozen croissants. You know those ones you can keep on hand? She does love a croissant. We had nothing. I just feel like a baked good. And you're not a house that just has baked goods on standby. Absolutely not. Let alone ingredients to make a cookie.

No way. So I was like, well, let's go to Woolies. Let's do it. I was like, this is fun. We haven't had a craving yet. Are you in your gym jams at this point? Yeah, we were in our pajamas. And I was like, let's go to Woolies.

I was excited. I was probably more excited than her. I was like, it's our cravings. We've got cravings. We've got a craving. It's taken 27 weeks, but we're here. So she was like, you reckon? Okay, we got changed to trackies and put something over the top.

Went to Woolies. Good on you for not going in your pyjamas. I don't like that. Good. I went to one of my Berks, though. I think she wore her Crocs. Went to Woolies. Take what we can get.

Woolies, by the way, at like 8.30, 9 o'clock at night, great time to shop. What time do they close? 10. 10, okay. Great time to shop. No one's in there. It's so fun. I mean, you walk in and the checkout people are like, what are people doing in here?

There was still a couple people there, but I was like, obviously, we do breakfast ready. We can never go to Woolworths that late. But I was like, this is cool. This is fun. All the cool people hang out at Woolies at 9pm at night. I told myself that on a Friday night. For baked goods. Now, did you go to the bakery section or did you go to one of the aisles?

So, I went to the bakery section, but the downside of going to Woolies late at night is they didn't have much left. I was about to say, for that sort of fresh produce, that's going to be no man's land. What about a Woolies mud cake? Because Morgan loves chocolate cake. I don't consider that a baked good. Oh, really? Does she?

Yeah, I mean, it's a cake. Anyway, they didn't have any of those either. Oh, okay. So,'t consider that a baked good. Oh, really? Does she? Yeah, I mean, it's a cake. Anyway, they didn't have any of those either. Oh, okay. So we went to the bake dial, got the Betty Crocker packet mix. You know what I mean? I got a minute. We're cooking. We actually are doing it.

Well, I said to her, she goes, I don't feel like cooking. I was like, I was just so excited. I was like, I'll go home. I'll cook this. Like, come on. Did she narrow it down? I do want cake. No, she was just saying baked goods.

Okay. She wasn't making much sense. I was really pushing this journey. I was like, come on, let's do it. I don't know what's harder, giving just such a blanket baked good, or if she'd been really specific and then maybe you can't find that thing. So maybe it's better. She was a bit, I'll take anything.

I'll take whatever. I was like, we'll get a Betty Crocker moist chocolate cake mix. Hello, not devil's food cake. It was a devil's food cake? Were you naughty? It was just a chocolate cake. And I was like, I'll make it. She about not devil's food cake? I don't know. It was a devil's food cake? I don't know. Were you naughty? It was just a chocolate cake.

And I was like, I'll make it. She's like, I can't be bothered. I was like, I've never made a cake in my life. Okay. And she's like. Of all your strengths, Ducco, I don't think baking is one of them. Hell no. If you can't throw just a mishmash of ingredients into your slow cooker,

I don't know. Well, I'm an excellent slow cooker. That's what I'm saying. Baking is quite precise, though. It is. Anyway, Morgan's like, okay, should we get some ice cream to go with the cake? Oh, okay. Now we're making a whole thing.

So we went to the ice cream aisle, and how's this? She hates Neapolitan. Doesn't like it. I'm a huge Neapolitan. Neapolitan is stupid. I love it. No one likes strawberry. Just buy chocolate.

Are you kidding? Strawberry and vanilla are the only flavors I eat. What? I love green. You're an elf nut. Of course you'd want the fruit one. I'm the best person to share Neapolitan with because I don't like the chocolate. So Morgan can just have the whole chocolate side.

I'll just have the white and the pink. What? Yep, that's all I have. Okay. She calls me a child. I'm like, uh, they're colourful and nice. Do you swirl them up too? Yeah, obviously.

Oh, and you have them together at the same time? It turns out, by the way, I can't have Neapolitan anymore. My guts were not well. Oh, no, you paid for it. That was the last chapter for Neapolitan for the duck. So you had to at 8. By now, what, it's 9 o'clock? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

9.30 by the time you've landed on this. So we get Neapolitan. She doesn't even like Neapolitan. She regretted it the minute we got home. She's like, why did I get this? Your hormones are everywhere. The mood is going up and down. I'm having the time of my life.

So do you even own a cake tin? How did you make the cake? I think so. Yeah, we do. And like a sifter and stuff like that. So I'm getting all the stuff out. Hello, sifter. So I start getting stuff out.

I'm reading the instructions. Is that Adriano Zumbo? He's like, no, it's just taco. I'm reading it. I'm like, five tablespoons of butter. Okay. Soften three eggs. Get room temperature cake mix.

Eggs in large bowl. Beat it. And I'm there going, this is going to be more complicated than I anticipated. I was going to say, do you have a beater? No. You just do a handheld. Fork. You didn't even have a whisk?

No. I was going to say, because that's another thing of baking. You've got to really make sure everything is combined because once you cook it, it's going to separate and get all weird. But Morgan, who knows me so well, I think anticipates, goes, let's get the ice cream because she's like, the cake's never going to happen. She always needs an entree. We're just going to have the icea goes, let's get the ice cream because she's like, the cake's never going to happen. She always needs an entree.

We're just going to have the ice cream. So she serves herself the ice cream. She sits on the couch and she's eating that like, oh, this is pretty good. I'm like, just chucking eggs in bowls and doing stuff. Hello, Channel 9's calling. Dessert Masters is on the line. Duggo. I looked up her at one stage. It was like 9.45 and I was like, I don't think I can do this.

Oh, hang on. You haven't put it in the oven at this point. It's still been an hour. We're still in bowl town. It didn't get that far. I just ended up having the pink and the white ice cream. Hang on. You wanted to do it.

How far did you go for the craving? I took my wife to Woolies at night, baby. You didn't go very far at all. I tried my hardest, okay? It's a packet mix. How did you fail on a packet, Kate? It wasn't good to start that late at night, all right? Then I was hungry.

Then I saw her eating the ice cream. I wanted the ice cream. And by then she didn't care. You're not the one who had the craving. By then she didn't care. I think by then she was over. She wanted to go to bed. I was pushing a dead horse.

So why did you just leave it all there? That's tomorrow morning's problem. We're not cleaning that up right now. Went to bed. I was like, was that a dream? Wow. So we went very far for the craving. Wow.

Yeah. So 13, 10, 60. How far did you go for the craving? Whether you executed or not. Did your partner step up or not step up? Or not step up. Because I really thought this was going to be a hero story for me. As I say it, it doesn't sound too good.

What does my mum always say? It's the thought that counts. That's it. You had great thoughts. How we went to Woolies at night. No execution. Jess and Daco. Jess and Daco.

How far did you go for the craving? Did your hubby or partner, whoever it may be, step up for you for the cravings? Yeah. And were they successful? Were they successful? Morgan had cravings. She wanted a late night baked good. So we decided to go to Woolies.

Nothing left. I said I'd make it. I'd step up for the Betty Crocker packet mix. She also wanted an ice cream. Which is like all done for you except mixing an egg. I also don't think I was reading it right that day. It was like 9.30 at night. Don't play the dyslexia card just because you can't cook.

What am I doing? The thought was there and Morgan got ice cream instead, which is a far cry from a baked good, but she seemed happy. Baby's happy. When she was eating Neapolitan, she was like, this sucks. I don't know why I got Neapolitan. And I was like, well, we wanted it. We like Neapolitan.

And then I ended up getting bad IBS from it, and we didn't have the cake. Morgan, I don't think you're allowed to have any more cravings. You're done. You're done. I was just so excited for her to have a craving. Please have a baked good craving at 7 a.m. on a weekday, because that's when the bakers are firing. But 13, 10, 60.

How far did you or your partner have to go for the craving? Heidi, good morning to you. Hi. You were craving something when you were pregnant. Yes, I was craving spring rolls. I was working at Macca's at the time and I had to ring my sisters to bring them to work for me. Okay. Oh, to bring the spring rolls to Macca's. I don't want any of the deep fried food Macca's at the time, and I had to ring my sisters to bring them to work for me. Okay.

Oh, to bring the spring rolls to Macca's. I don't want any of the deep-fried food Macca's can provide. I specifically need a spring roll. And did you eat them at Macca's? I did. While you were on your shift, like, holding the chip machine and stuff? She's flipping burgers, being like, I just need to get this springy in. No, I went and sent out the back and ate them.

Okay, very good. Like a plate of spring rolls to eat. Had your sisters been pregnant before, like they understood when a pregnant woman needs something, you get off your bum and you get it for her. I was the first one to be pregnant out of my sister. Okay, good respect from the sisters executing. Jamie Lee on 131060, how far did you go or he go for the cravings?

Hi, Daco. Hi, Jess. Hi, Jamie. I am a single mom, so it was me doing the running around, trying to get my cravings. 9.30 at night, I Ubered dumplings. I don't even like dumplings. I don't like the texture, but that's all I wanted.

Isn't it so funny? Your brain is like, you don't like this, but this is what you want? Yeah. It was delicious, but it was gross. And they didn't deliver soy sauce. So here I am messaging my neighbours, who's got soy sauce? Who can bring me around soy sauce? And one of my neighbours brought me down a bottle.

How good is that? Everybody needs good neighbours. Everyone needs good neighbours. I can't be having no dry dumplings. Dry dumplings, you can't do that. That's blasphemy. That's funny. They were disgusting, but they were great.

That's great. We go to Liam here. This is good. Liam, it says you failed your pregnant wife. I sure did. Back when we were having our first child, she was pretty heavily pregnant. She asked me to run and get a cheeseburger from Macca's. So, yes, I thought I'd run, get myself a little something on the side as well.

Got to Macca's, done the order, made it all the way home. I should probably check the bag before then. Wait, Liam, it broke up just then? What was that? I should probably check the way home. I should have probably checked the bag before then. Wait, Liam, it broke up just then? What was that? I should have probably checked the bag beforehand. They didn't put her cheeseburger in. Oh, no. And it was late at night.

I refused to go back out. So I still never been able to be, she's never let it down. Liam, so you got your order and we'll just ate it in front of her. Well, I attempted to share, but she was already in a bad mood. Yeah, you can't recover from that. Oh, that's like the worst outcome. Exactly. Sally, on 131060, wrap us up here, Sally.

What was your craving? Mine was Coke, but it specifically had to be in a glass bottle. I lived in rural North Queensland, so we lived in a mining town. I drove two hours. Stop it. I went to every shop in the town, nowhere. I drove to the next town, which was an hour away. No, they didn't have the glass bottles.

I just had to drive all the way into Mackay to get my glass bottles. Oh, my God. I spent about $100 just to make sure I had enough for the next craving. Had your craving subsided by the time you actually got to it or had only intensified on the drive? No, not at all. Not at all. I was adamant.

I had to have it. And I don't drink Coke. I'm not a busy drinker. It's so funny. It's what you don't like and what you don't have. And when you had that first sip of the glass Coke that took you out. It was like the best thing I'd ever drank on Earth. Yeah.

She's like, give me all of them. I need to take them all home with me. And I had that specific craving with all four of my boys. How bizarre. Isn't it? It's interesting. And I can't stand Coke now that I'm not pregnant. Awful.

There you go. Isn't it funny? That's funny. I don't even really like Coke out of the glass bottle. I much prefer a can. Oh, see, glass bottle Coke is good. Yeah, see, when you've got a craving for that, that is specific. That's what you go. Isn't that funny? That's funny. I don't even really like Coke out of the glass bottle. I much prefer a can. Oh, see, glass bottle Coke is good. Yeah, see, when you've got a craving for that, that is specific. That's what you want.

That's what you want. And Betty Crocker packet mix. Jess and Ducco. I know there is a big conversation. It's been happening for a while. I think I'm going to credit Gen Z with coining the term. Social media ran with it. I think it might have been like word of the year in 2020 or something.

Right. Mansplaining. Yes. Which is basically when a dude thinks he's got more knowledge about a topic than you and, you know, is a bit too confident, is a bit too cocky, a bit too condescending. It tips from just straight up explaining into its own category of. Let me show you how to do this.

Exactly. I'll tell you how to do this. My favourite memes are when it's like a dude saying to someone in a professional field, I think you need to read more. You should read a work by so-and-so McCartney. And she's like, I am that person you've just quoted. Those are the extreme incidents. Yeah.

But I had a situation where I actually asked for it and it kind of backfired. I had some friends around for dinner the other night and I was trying to show off. I had about 15 things going on the stove, one of them being flaked almonds. I wanted to top some green beans with a flaked almond. Oh, that's nice. I like that. Same. My mum used to do that for dinner parties and it's like, you know those memories you have of just the pinnacle of hosting?

Yeah. The flaked almond. I don't even like almonds. They make it though, don't they? The look of it just elevates it to something, I don't know, Gordon Ramsay might play it up or Lisa Faggioni. But I've not really worked with flaked or slivered almonds before and I was just like, I'm going to toast them. How hard could it be? I guess I put them in a pan. I'm not dumb enough to put them in the toaster. I'll put them in a pan. Now, one of my friends is an ex-chef, and he happened to be in the kitchen

because he was also prepping something that he was going to serve alongside my meal, and he saw me. Were you nervous cooking in the kitchen with an ex-chef? Well, not really because I was on my high horse. I was like, I'm doing the flaked almond on the beans. I'm going to impress him and the rest of our friends. So I load up the pan and put the fire on or whatever. And he went,

I have an induction. I don't even have fire. You're starting a fire, are you? Do you go get some sticks? I hate our induction. I'd rather work with fire. It feels more authentic. Put it on level six, my stupid induction stove.

And Dan taps me on the shoulder and he goes, nah, don't worry about it. I went, no, no. What were you going to say? He goes, no, no, no. It's your, I don't want to mansplain. Did he say that? He said the words, I don't want to mansplain and went on to say, I'm in your kitchen.

Yeah. Yeah. Your house. But he is a chef though. So I feel like it's different. Exactly. So I went, oh no, no. I don't think this is whatever you're going to say.

Yeah. I don't think it's mansplaining. I think you might be explaining. Yes. Which is different. You're not condescending. As long as it's not cond to say. Yeah. I don't think it's mansplaining. I think you might be explaining. Yes. Which is different. You're not condescending. As long as it's not condescending. Totally.

And he went on for about, not too long, but he sort of went into the nitty gritty about nuts are sensitive. Nuts are very fragile. Yes, they are. Trust me, I know. Yes. Coming from a man. This is your area of expertise.

Nuts is your area of expertise, Dan Not just with your chef experience But he went on to say Be careful with the nuts Because even if you toast them For however long And they're perfect Make sure you take them off the heat And even out of the pan

Because if they're around heat They'll keep cooking They'll keep toasting Oh, right I didn't know that That's not mansplaining at all So you can't just leave them in the pan But the pan because if they're around heat, they'll keep cooking. They'll keep toasting. Oh, right. I didn't know that. That's not mansplaining at all. So you can't just leave them in the pan, but the pan's off. Exactly.

Don't even take them just off the element. It'll keep cooking. And he went on for a bit. I went, no, I appreciate that. I'm trying to impress my friends. No worries. But knowing me, I start to get a couple of wine, this and that, just make sure they're topped up, this and that.

All of a sudden, I don't know how long has passed. Oh, no. And Dan goes, I think something's burning. Oh, no. I tried to tell you. And they had basically caught a light. I went, Dan, if you'd been harder with your mansplaining. Oh, so you wanted to mansplain her.

You wanted to be more ruthless. I was like, you needed to be more condescending. And you were trying to be polite. Because I took it too gently. I went, you weren't condescending enough that this was your area of expertise. And now me nuts are burnt. But if he went and took over in that moment, took over everything, you'd be upset. Absolutely.

There's a fine line here. This would be a whole other conversation about my mate who's... Yeah, took over from you. Took over from me. And mansplained. Jess and Daco. Welcome to a glorious looking Tuesday. Just about done here, team.

It's been a glorious morning. Hasn't it just? Mainly because we have a co-fod, I think. We're dangling a little prize to walk away with every show, not just at the end of the week. $250 to spend with our mates at Officeworks, just in time, I guess, for school to go back. You need those school supplies.

I used to love resetting the pencil case with Mum and Dad at the start of the school year. Of course you did. Oh, my God. I remember my first set of Crayola pencils. Oh. I hated it. I was so bad at, like, I had bubbles in my books and everything and the contacting.

Oh, God. Do people still contact their kids' books? Is it still a thing? I don't know. I didn't know if they had books. It feels very anti-environment, doesn't it? It feels like more plastic. Yeah.

Anyway. So that $250, we thank everyone for getting involved today. Always. But we can't go past Sally. Yep. You just got involved earlier talking about driving two hours to find Coca-Cola in a glass bottle to satisfy a late night craving. Wild.

When she was heavily pregnant. I do like this one. That's just come through on the text though, Ducko. 0-4-8-8-8-1-0-6-9. I think you'll like it. Kira has said, I was 39 weeks pregnant and all I wanted at 6.30am on a Sunday was a finger bun. Oh, God.

How good are finger buns? It needed to have pink icing. I know you like those ones. Yeah, yeah, yeah. With coconut and sultanas. Oh. She wanted a sultana-y finger bun. She goes, I drove around for an hour.

I could not find one at any of the bakeries in the area. Walked away with a bloody lamington. Oh. Hey, substitute. Substitutes matter. Sorry, Kira. Sorry. Sorry that happened to you.

Finger buns are so fantastic, guys. And I imagine that's one of those things. If you want a finger bun, nothing is coming close. Nothing's tickling that itch until you get it. You're going to need to have an actual finger bun. Oh, yes. A lamington's good, but it's no finger bun. Yeah.

And sometimes if you get those big square lamingtons, it's too much lamington. Yeah. You need the little squares. Yeah. The ratio of chocolate to coconut to sponge is better. It's just a bit odd. It's a bit too much. It's like, what am I eating?

How do I hold it? How do I hold it? What do I do? Which corner do I start from? And then it'll be chocolate and coconut all around my mouth. Yeah's better. It's a bit too much. It's like, what am I eating? How do I hold it? How do I hold it? What do I do? Which corner do I start from? And then it'll be chocolate and coconut all around my mouth. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I get it. You understand.

Hey, make sure you join us on the podcast, though, because today in our podcast, we're doing a special Babs' blog. That's right. We're beta testing a new idea. Babs will bring us a piece of content, whether it's from her personal life or something she's seen in the news. Yeah. I hope she's covering the inauguration.

Maybe she'll cover the inauguration from Babs' perspective. Oh, wow. I'd love to see that. There's no limit. The sky's the limit for Babs. Did you see, so Trump just got sworn in as president. He's now president of America. Did you see Melania there?

She looked like a white lady's funeral advocate. She had a strong hat on. She had the hat on, the white lady's funeral hat. What had a strong hat on. She had the hat on. Which someone is saying is basically, it was acting almost as a barrier. Trump has gone in for a kiss on the cheek and he can't get to her because the brim is so wide and stiff. He tried to and then she just like brimmed him. She brimmed him.

She brimmed him. She brimmed him and he had to move away. She kept her head down that whole inauguration. That was so uncomfortable. She doesn't want to borrow it. She does not. Oh, but no one more so than Kamala. Kamala Harris is obviously in the background there.

It's tough for her. Alongside Biden as they hand the baton over. Unconfirmed, but I think she was drunk. I've just... Oh, do you blame her? She's just trying to get through. I've just seen a thing that says the team, like the White House team, has five hours to kick Biden's stuff out and get Trump's stuff in.

I saw that. I could do a complete Airbnb handover switchover. I thought I'd allow just a day to do in. I saw that. Like do a complete, like Airbnb handover, switchover. I thought it was just a day to do that. I know, why is it five hours? I suppose when one's sworn in, the other's gone. So that's the time you've got to do it, and they've got to come in then and there. They're not staying in an Airbnb down the road.

I wonder how old the mattresses are. Like, is it weird to think how many presidents? Like Obama and Michelle have been on these. Yeah. Biden, he's been on these. I wonder how far back they go. Has Roosevelt been on those? Has Roosevelt?

Uh-huh. Reagan? Yeah. Oh, what's the controversial? Nixon? Oh, Nixon. Has Nixon been on this mattress? Kennedy?

Have they? Kennedy. Surely they've upgraded their mattress game. That would be... I can see Melania and Trump going in being like, we want new stuff. All new stuff. Have to be extreme king beds as well. I can smell Biden on this mattress.

Yeah. You've left one of Biden's diapers behind. You know sometimes you go to a hotel and as thorough as the housekeeping team might be, you find something. You do. Imagine in the White House. It'd be crazy. Imagine if the walls could talk. Oh, they get new mattresses

every time apparently. Is that from Babs or Shy Guy? That's not me. Babs, excellent from you. Thank you. They also get their windows washed, carpets vacuumed or replaced. Well, I'd hope they vacuum the carpets. And all carpets will be stocked with fresh linens and towels. Okay. They get carpets replaced?

What are they doing in there? Yeah, carpet replacement. What are they doing in there? A new mattress. Oh, that feels very wasteful. It's only four years old. Mattresses have like a 20-year lifetime. I don't want someone else's mattress, though.

Yeah. You know? The president gets to pick the colours of the carpets and the curtains. I think. Okay, there you go. There you go. Learning a lot. Learning a lot.

But we're out of here. Back tomorrow. Tomorrow is Wednesday, so we've got Shy Guy Dips. Shy Guy Dips, which this year we're dipping cereal. It's good, too. It's off to a good start. It took us a while to get to Milo last week. Yeah.

So let's have some fun. People have already been stopping him in the shop saying, what's the cereal this week? I'm trying to do some insider training. Yeah, we're looking at you, Melanie. We know you're listening. We know you're doing, Melanie. We know you're up to it.

We're out of here. We'll see you tomorrow. Bye-bye. Bye. Also, I shouldn't juggle for Jono. Not. Jess and Ducko. That was the Jess and Ducko podcast.

The new loose change menu has dropped at Macca's. OMG. T's and C's apply.