Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Mischief Managed

Episode Date: October 21, 2025

Do you have a tattoo you regret? Jess' husband has softened her landscaping plans and we ask where'd you bleed?Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The new spicy Frank's red-hot sauce range has arrived at Maccas. This is the Jess and Douggo podcast. Podcast, fuck yeah. Recall the pole. We live in the day yet. Podcast, fuck yeah. Here we are. Another juicy day.

Another great day I had by all. Absolutely. We learned about Loquots. We learned about pot fillers. Yeah. We learned... Pumpkins. We learned about pumpkins.

McKent pumpkin. Absolutely. Yeah. Isn't that amazing? We actually learned about pumpkins at the top of the show and then the woman who played Alpha Box was a pumpkin grower. I mean, that was some beautiful synergy. What are the odds of that?

What are the actual odds of that? That is interesting. She grew that Queensland something. Queensland blue? Yeah, something... Amazing synergy. I love when life bats up those little things. Yeah.

A billion people on the planet. And we got a pumpkin grower. We spoke to a pumpkin grower. Unbelievable. Yeah, you'll hear her on the show. She was fantastic. Great of the game, too. Very good.

She was disappointed. She got the nine. You're right. She was upset that the subject was are, and the one she didn't answer was a school subject, which I would have thought religion is a biggie. That's a biggie because particularly, does your mind go to,

when you have the question school subject, does your mind go to primary school or high school? High school. Yeah, see, so does mine, and I just feel like, I guess you didn't go to a, oh, that makes sense. We went to religious high school. Did you study religion at your school? Yeah, I had to.

And then for HACC, you have to do religion as well. You're a religious school, Catholic school? Yeah, we went to a Catholic school. Oh, okay. Shogai did you? No, we did not have to do. Religion? We did up until year nine, I believe.

But it was all religions? Yeah, yeah, yeah. All religions. All religions. See, my religion was only mandatory. Yeah, same to unite. It was only Catholic. You could choose to, you could electively do it.

Absolutely. I can't believe you were mandatory, had to do it for your exams. Yeah, you have to. do? We had to as well. Really? Yeah, yeah. Up until grade 10?

Wow. Yeah, yeah. Oh, but not for your... Not for... Yeah, yeah, not for our thing. No, no, no, no. Yeah, but you had to do it to contribute to the ATA. Yeah, to my ATA, yeah.

Jesus. So you could be much... But you could choose to do one unit or two, I don't know. One of them was, like, one unit was more, like... Intense. ...collective religion, but I think the two unit was more intense. Yes, yes. And, like, really got into it, so I only did one unit.

Ah, there you go. Yeah. I know a couple of girls that I went to high school with chose religion because they thought it would be easy and it turned out to be very difficult because even though it's a very, I guess, you know, philosophical and it should be very open-ended, it was very like cut and dry. Yeah, yeah. Falling flat a little bit. I mean, religion was one of the great bludge subjects to go to. You know what I mean? Absolutely.

But dependent on your teacher. Yeah, some of them took it really seriously. Very serious R. Yeah. You needed an R.A. teacher. That was also English arts. They always doubled. something else. You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't have any dedicated R.

Well, yeah, there was a head of... That was their whole wheelhouse. There was a head of religion. Oh, they see, they would have taken it seriously. Oh, geez. Encouraging you to take it up for a year 11 and 12. How does that happen in your life? It's like, Duck, oh, I see you following the path of Jesus. You should do it for your exams. No, thanks, sweetheart. No one's ever said that to me, surprisingly enough.

I can see you follow the path of the great man. You're a Eucharistic minister. I know. I work in mysterious ways, but I was... He was going to get nailed to a cross. I was more of a Moses guy, you know? Your part in the Red Sea. Part of the Red Sea. Just moving things for people. You know what I mean?

Just leading some flock. Yeah, always steering the sheep in mysterious ways. That big stick. You are a Moses guy. Yeah, huge Moses guy. Through and through. Always, always, always. Yeah, yeah.

But no, it is a great show today. You'll hear a lot of that photo shoot we did yesterday for an update. Yes, make sure you're following. Justin Ducko, some great behind the scenes. Yeah. Shy guy and babs on the tools, working it. Yeah. Capturing us doing some great stuff with a chair.

Yep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Was it fun for you guys to get involved in the photo shoot? Yeah, it was fun to watch. To play, to be in. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, it was fun. Cool up. He's not asking if you enjoyed watching us. No, I mean, no one enjoys watching fucking photos shoots, mate. I don't enjoy watching it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was great watching you guys post. Yeah, you guys looked so hot.

I mean, I've been showing everyone that photo with me jumping. I'm like, look how good I was looking at the photo. I was like, I looked really put together. It's like, my housemate was like, wow. It's like a full-on glam shoot. I know. It didn't even mean it. Yeah, I know.

Maybe you need to take all your photos jumping now with Deadpan. That's not a bad idea. You know what we should do for Babbs's birthday next year? Hire at a billboard and just get her up on it. Just jumping. Just cropped out. Happy birthday, Babs. You look hot.

Bleed home. Bleed home. Bleed on. Yeah, no, you did look good in that photo, Babs. You look very like natural. Thank you. Yeah. We're all doing through different emotions in that photo.

We really came at it with different motivations. Yeah. I think absolutely. We did. Yeah. And we'll see which one of those ends up on the new market. Yeah, I don't reckon they're going to go for any of the jumping. I think that's just going to be ours.

I think it'll be ours. Lucky we're in charge of all our social media. We'll do whatever we want. Yeah, what happens with that? Nothing. Like, yeah, yeah. I wouldn't be surprised. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if marketing go, oh, we'll just stick with the ones you did two years ago.

Probably. And we just end up doing whatever we did. It doesn't matter. We just put them in ours. Like, who's seeing our marketing photos? They weren't even on. They're not promoting us anywhere. Genuinely, they weren't even on board with, I gave this analogy to someone the other day when I was talking about

a little, how tricky is. it has been to organise this thing, and they were like, but isn't like advertising you guys important? I went, Mac is one of the biggest brands in the world advertisers. Like if they are brand you would think wouldn't need to market, markets, does that not tell you that marketing is important? But that's okay. We do it ourselves.

It's fine. Marketing is important and they market some shows. Yes, the channels. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The river is only flowing in one direction. Where at the end of the stream? We are the end of the street. We're a pond

way back. We're still water a pond that hasn't had any fresh water for a while. We're not connected to the river. Yeah, right. We're a pond. We're a puddle.

We're a rock pool. You and me are on a couple of lily pads. Sharky and Babs are just swimming around. You and I. We're all four of us are jack frogs hanging on to this one lily pad. Just hoping. Just hoping for the best.

We use those photos when we send out to marketing and stuff. Like clients and stuff. They work with the truth. They see the photos. There you go internally. Oh, there you go. That's nice.

Send the jumping. When I send out stuff, too, it's on like the PowerPoints and stuff. Yeah. Oh, what do you send out? I send out briefs to clients to get us. Pricing? Pricing. So when you email Birkenstock, you go, this is all the guys will climb.

Yeah, and I give them all these numbers and figures and what the show's about and what Alphabox is. Yeah. So isn't it funny because, you know, the photos that we did have, they're a bit stiff. They're a bit boring. The new ones, the jumping, carry, whatever. That'll capture the show and make it get. The awkward family hugging ones. You want to be a part of this program?

Get involved. Get involved in this. We want to hug you. Yeah. Insert brand name. That's a bit of fun. You could be at the end here. Yes.

We can superimpose like, for example, let's say we were pitching to McDonald's. Yeah. We could superimpose Ronald's face over shy guy's body. Yeah. Insert you into the team. That's a bit of fun. You know. You can brush up on your Photoshop now.

That's right. That hugging one we had to do is funny because we're all sitting down hugging and I was like, I'm either going to have Babbs hugging me or I'm going to have to be hugging Babs. And I was like, I don't which one I prefer, because I know how stiff she's going to be and how uncomfortable this is going to be. You were hugging her. I was because I had you behind me, Jess, and then you were like really close. I was getting right up in there.

And then Babbs was in front of me like, oh, Babs, you should need to move in a bit more. Like, she was like, at least daylight away from me. Could have parked a car in between how far she was. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I could just, I could feel how rigid, which then makes me feel rigid. I'm like, ah. And then you got me really up to the way. And I was trying to be like.

Oh, you, don't worry, you were doing great work. What does that mean? You were just nice and close. The rumours are they? You were like, get in clothes. I'm like, I'm drying here. Can you speculate on the shy guy in a condo room? Man, I might be pregnant.

Jesus Christ. Was that quick, was it? I just had fucking bleeding big bleeds. Okay. You came home, Morgan goes, what's up until your jeans? Oh, Bab sat on me. Jesus. The plug fell out.

I told you those diva cups, man. The diva cups, you can't trust them. I don't have my period. I know. Don't you, though. Don't. I don't. Let's go back to how good bab's looked in the jumping photo.

Hang on, diva cup question. Yeah. Here we go. When you take it out, do you have to hold it? Like, so it doesn't fall and then. No, you just let it fall over the ground. I can go everywhere. Do you do it over the toilet bowl or like in the shower?

Like, yeah, I see it. If you take it out wrong, it's going to just fall out. Absolutely. So it's full. It is genuinely full. Hey. Yeah.

So you've got to be careful. Because like if you put it out and it was wrong, it would be like... 100%. So you try and do it over the toilet. Depends if you're low on iron. Yeah, yeah, of course. So you try and do it over the tut,

so then you're right there, capture any spillage. I've got mates who do it in the sink because I like to rinse. Yeah, because I like to rinse it out. Yeah, because I like to rinse it out. They stand up on the kitchen bed. You need to, what do you mean? They're re-sing, like bathroom sink. This is the flat alarm.

The bed, do you know, no doubt. I mean, they pull it out, walk it over. You think you've got to get up on the sink. You reuse them, right? You reuse them, you know, you just. Absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. So people like to rinse them.

Yeah. But how often are you in, like, a public toilet? There's no sink in there. So you've got to leave the cubicle, rinse it. Yeah. Go back in, get it back up. It's a whole thing. Oh, I see what you're saying.

Very good for the environment. Very good. There's no waste. But. Have either of you tried one? I've not tried one. I can't fathom trying to scrunch it into that board. Yeah, and being comfortable that it's going to work.

I know. Yeah, exactly. I'm a period under gal. Never let me down. I remember when my sister showed me a tampon in a cup of water. Oh, how much it expands. I really thought that was going a different direction. Yeah, me too.

When my sister showed me how to put in a tampon, I was like, fuck, man. Your house is odd. I'm pretty normal. They're close, man. It's nice. It's fine. She was like, hey, what's this? No, he's gone.

Your technique's all rough. Yeah, let me go. That was well. Jesus. I don't know how old. You seven, maybe. Jesus, podcast took a turn. He really did.

We need to yell content warning. You know, it's funny. I grew up with two sisters. I never remember seeing anything to do with periods at all from growing up. She had a bathroom. She had a bathroom growing up. I never remember seeing anything. You know, like Babbs keeps dinging the bell.

Sorry, I think it's like a wrap up here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm done. Yeah, yeah. It's the Hamish and Andy wrap-up. Yes. It's taking me in. I'm like, where are we right now?

It is fun to ding the bell, though. Why is that bell in here? I don't know. It's fun. Who brought it in here? I think I bought it in here when I started because I had a bell on my desk and I never made it. What was the bell for? Anything we wanted it to be for.

Okay. I had to ding the bell at a target yesterday when there was no service at the customer service. It is because I'm literally like, well, let's see what happened. But the issue is I could see her behind the thing. So I could have probably said excuse me But I'm like, so infrequently do I get to ring a bell Yeah, it's fun, it's like pressing the button You want to do it

Yeah, yeah, I get that It was nice Yeah, yeah I had to pick up me blueie toy I'm here to pick up a blueie toy Where's my blueie toy? Where's my talking blueie toy? Yeah, yeah

Anyway, anything else you want to touch on babes? Not really. Nah, you diva cup chatted out Yeah, sure. It's your menstruation handling method of choice. Did you show your family the photos of you jumping. No, no, I didn't.

I did. You showed them to friends? Yeah, like my housemates. And they were like, damn. Yeah, Lottie was like, wow. You look like not real. I was like, so true. So true. Fucking so true. Do the dishes, Lottie, you bitch. Jess and Dunker in the morning.

Stop what you're doing and listen. You know I got that shit that you like. There's only one show to wake up for you. I'm not that easy to take. Jess. Kissed him? Yeah, I don't know. Have a look at this.

It's a notice. I never have the courage to say harder. Got him going and saying, yeah, shy guy. He would do anything you want. Bass. Can we just have one week where we don't talk about doodles on this show? Fuck yeah, talk it. This is Jess and Dunker.

Yes, it is. Right on 6 o'clock. Hey, welcome to Wednesday, gang. Welcome. Wednesday. Firebans. Firebans in a lot of parts of the state. Hey, look at you coming on straight off the bat with fire gear.

Bro, it just shocked me so much. You know, I don't often look at the bomb. No, that's Babs' domain. That is Babs' domain. And I'll be honest, you used to tell me the weather every day, and we got rid of that because we all went... While you're doing it, man. You know, you still do the time, don't shop.

Yeah, you do. Do you? Yes, every break. Every break. Double jip there, I went, we get rid of time and weather, that was just the weather. So I often, because I lay my clothes out the night before, I don't even look. I just, I guess, I go, I'm going to be hot, whatever, shorts and a t-shirt, a dress, it's fine. The Apple Watch has been warning about fires.

Has it? Well, the only reason I went on the bomb was because I'm a celebrant tomorrow, and I just wanted to check what it's looking like for their day. Right. But my eyes obviously caught what it was looking like for today. I went 39. 39 today's just going to be warm. And yes, all the alarms going off. Five-Bend.

Because Babs told me this pretty quickly, and she told me a couple days ago. She pulled me aside and said, Oh, Duckman, it's going to be windy and 39. Ah, well, we know how you feel about the wind, my friend. Not only do I hate wind, but hot wind in this climate, man. Wind is not good. You know what it's good for? I guess getting a load of washing on and off the line within the day.

But other than that, hoolly-door. So, yes, I was just in shock. So it's going to be, tonight going to bed, how's this? At 10 p.m., it's still going to be 28. 8 o'clock at records it's going to be 32 degrees. That's too hot for bedtime, Ducko. That's disgusting anymore. My husband did say at dinner last night, he goes,

I think we need to get a pedestal fan for the bedroom. I was like, I don't want that oscillating the sound of it. I'm not like you with the rain. I need silence. I need silence. But he is sweating up a storm. Can't actually sleep. I mean, nothing's worse than sleeping hot.

No, exactly. He already has no duna, no sheet. Very minimal pajama situation. He's sure what that nightly jock strap. That's all he's got on is the minimal fabric. He goes, I'm still too hot. I'm sweating up Like a grease monkey in here

So we're entering pedestal fan in the bedroom And yes The fire warnings I thought we got to get it out at the top Yeah People have missed it No barbecue safe out there

Please do Or a fire band No fires No Avvo fires If you are still on Analog darts No flicking them out the window Yeah

That's true actually That's the big one That's one That's one positive Of a vape You know what I mean True Yeah

I think vapes exploding They can Yeah they can do that I don't know There was that vision That went viral I remember that young kid What was he doing?

I think he was behind the desk at some retail job. Slot in his pants or his face. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can do that. No good. No good. But hey, look, stay cool today. That's right.

It's always too hot today to, like, be at a beach or, like, even be out of pool. You want to jump in and jump out. 100%. 100. I couldn't agree more. That hot sand or the hot, oh, careful walking your dogs. Yeah, you can't be walking the dogs, too. It's going to be too hot post sort of 8 o'clock.

I feel like I see people look at me. I'll be halfway through a walk with Gianni. And I'll go, oh, my God. I haven't. check the ground. Oh, my God. So I bend down on all fours and I'm touching it with my hands, get my knees on there.

See, if you could handle it. Exactly. But I see people walk past me like, what's this lady doing? Who's taking who for a walk? You're like sniffing your dog's butt, touching the ground. Everyone's like, is she all right? Is she all right? We're too far away from anything.

When I take Princess Pam for a walk, I just carry her when it's too hot. I was going to say, I'm surprised you don't have little shoes or beauties for the princess. She would just stop and not walk. She would just go dead square and not walk. She's like a goat. You know, is it goats that gets to go sheep or whatever, and they freeze? When you pick them up and they go, like, rigam water. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's Pam.

When you pick her up, she goes rigaboard, she goes dead straight. And she's a big girl, like, so that would be. She's so big, yeah. Can you try and do that trend where you, like, spun her around? That's right. Like, years ago, when you, like, film yourself from their perspective, spinning them around. That's right. Or film them from, like, you put the phone, like, in your mouth.

And they've got the triple chin obviously, just the way their bodies are. She hated it. She, I can't imagine. She enjoyed that. Hated it. But hey, we've already covered, had a great photo shoot yesterday. Team was looking, oh, fire. Fire.

I'm going to put it on the record. I think we're the best looking team in audio. Yeah, you'd have to think so. Because there's some ugly pricks in what we do. I was about to name so people, and then you said that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you go. You go.

Now, they know who they are. But check us out. We did say there might be some behind the scenes. If you've missed any, it's on the Jess and Ducko story. Yeah. Before Shy Guy and Babs got in front of the camera themselves, they were doing some great work capturing us. that our best.

Some BTS. Some BTS. If nothing else, I got some great LinkedIn shots. You know? Docko, did you see the catalogue of what the photographer got on you?

There's so many, I did not. You got headshots galore, babe. Yeah, that would be my latest acting head. I'll be signing those sending around the office. I was going to say, the next time you're on a science panel, send one of those as your headshot. Yeah, yeah, not my headshot from a decade ago.

I'm a murderer up. Because, to be fair, when you Google Nick Duck O'all and Duckett, your old, old old head. It comes up. even though obviously we've inundated social media. It's not a great Google real. I did the other day, it's old headshots that look bad,

and then it's sperm fertility issues. I'm like, geez, I'm more than that. So let's flood Google Images with these new hot shots of you. Struddle in a chair. Fireman. Yeah, thank you. You look good, too. Appreciate you.

Yeah, yeah. Someone did say, oh, I know what happened to pluck a duck because I am wearing a pink feathered outfit. That's a good one. That was not bad for them. The feathered outfit. I love a feather. You do.

like a feather. I don't even know if that that image will be used anywhere. Yeah. I just like a feather. Yeah. And the team ones are fun. We've got some good team ones

which will post up when we get all that. Well, are they good ducko? Because I've just been inundated with Is shy guy okay? Yeah. I mean, Shark guy, you cannot take a photo.

You get so rigid. We found it yesterday. You struggled to jump. Well, no, I struggle to jump because I'm not confident that I'm not going to hear my head on the lighting above. I see.

You got to jump that high. No, but it's just a, it's like a mental thing. It's a mental walk into like a lift. I see. So I've never, ever in my life had that issue. And that's why you're able to sort of heaven.

I just go high. Ducko, what I'm hearing is we need to get him in a field. Yeah, a meadow. Where there is no... Yeah, let's have some jump practice. Let's have some jump practice. I think I was jumping at the wrong time too. Yeah, it was okay.

It was really complicated. The direction was jumping on. One, three, two, one. And he just, it was a little complex. You jump on two, and that would sort of level him out. The choreography, I understand. It was a little advanced. And you'll hear later in the show how one of us had an issue, had a photo injury.

Oh, there was, there was first aid required. It was blood. I was cleaning a team member's blood. There was. Off the ground. Where did the leak come from? Who leaked? That's the question.

Oh, that's the question. Who leaked? Where did you leak? That's right. Who leaked on you? Were you wearing white pants? You know, any sort of question. And also, cleaning somebody else's blood is a disgusting thing to do.

I really want to get to that, Ducco. We can, let's get into it now. We can touch on it again in a couple of hours. How did you and I snap into parent mode? You know, Shaw got I didn't clean the blood, but he was attending to the, ah, it was bad, let's be real. Yeah, we've eliminated all the lots of the matter. We was attending to say you were at all the hands and he's scrubbing blood off the floor.

I'm so proud of us. Like, when I got home, I was like, we were telling the story, and I sort of went, How's Ducco and I just snapping into, I think, parent mode is what I landed on. I was just really worried for the studio because I didn't want to blood stains. That's the thing I realized we didn't actually tend to the, let's call her the child of this meeting. Well, shy guy had her. Shy guy had her. You and I went, let's clean.

And we got paper towel and you found detergent and wipes and this. And I just went, how's us? And I found the first egg kit. Look at you go. Yeah, you did. The only person who didn't take responsibility was she who leaked. And Babbs was just like going, oh, what happened? I didn't even feel...

Well, I didn't know what to do. I was shocked. Yeah, yeah. She was in shock. You were just glad it was from your toe. Yeah, yeah. Big show, Tame. Absolutely.

Huge show. Got that call of fame, 500 at Reflections Holiday Park. Yes, we do. That'd be fantastic. Well, we asked where Jalek. Get involved. You could be going. Sharon's on the phone.

Grandma's birthday. Hey, up next, though, we're talking... Those diva cups, man, you can't trust him. Up next, we're talking the giant floating pumpkin race at Oregon. And I appreciate it. Let's bring the rice cooks behind the scenes. Shirego goes, let's start sporty. Yeah, yeah.

That's his breath of sporting knowledge. And had the word races in it, that's sporty. Yeah, Bazel put a photo in the article, I'm sure. Yeah, great. Jess and Ducko. Just and Ducko. Right now, I didn't know they did this in Oregon over in the States. They have a giant floating pumpkin

Race. What do you mean you didn't know? How did I not know? Where'd you been? Yeah. You've been under a rock. I should have been there. God damn it.

You're the sporty one of the team. You should be across all this. How am I not across the cheese race? The cheese wheel race. We love the cheese wheel race. People just knock themselves out. You're across the squirrel kite surfing, but you're not across pumpkin raising. Obviously squirrel kite surfings are main event on my calendar.

My family will sit down and watch it. I know you say, I get up at 3 a.m. On a Monday to watch the Chiefs, I know you're watching Squirrel Kites. And I pay a pretty. I pay a pretty penny to do it because the YouTube stream is just me. Pay per view. It's me and a guy in India and we're just pumping it out. Yes, he's a big fan also.

Oh, Ganesh loves it. Anyway, the West Coast Giant Pumpkin Race in 2004. Started this race, this race started since 2004. I know. Yeah, you get it. Well, you should be doing this article. It draws... No, no, no.

I'll pretend like I don't know stuff. Okay. It draws large crowds who cheer on. They dress in costumes and they race around a small human man. made lake in huge pumpkins that have been carved out, allowing them to float. Is this like a Halloween thing? Obviously, Pumpkin in America is very synonymous with Halloween.

It's, you know, next weekend or whatever. Is that an anticipation of Halloween weekend? Gary Christensen, who won it, was dressed as Buddy from Will Ferrell's elf movie. Oh, you know how I feel about that movie? I also don't love Elf. Did he have to grow the pumpkin? You know how farmers will do those comps of growing giant veg? Where are they getting these huge pumpkins that can double as a boat?

Well, I can tell you. The pumpkins weigh 425 kilos. Jesus. So you must, I don't know if it, this thing's built on a lab. I don't know if you get natural pumpkins like that. No, no. How's this? It's much more than a one annual affair.

Earlier this year, he claimed a Guinness World Record for longest journey by pumpkin boat after paddling 58 miles, aka 94K. This guy is committed to his pumpkin boat. He won that because no one else has ever tried to go for that. That's the only reason. That's a great point around Guinness World Records. Can you claim the title or the record or whatever? If no one else is trying it because it's ridiculous. Stupid.

Stupid. One of the pumpkins was 624 kilos. That's a record for one of the heaviest pumpkins ever. You need a boat trailer for that. How are you actually transporting that to the man-made lake? And then how long does it take it to gut it? You know, to sit in it, you'd have to gut it, right? Yeah, you'd have to gut it.

Like a jack-o-lantern. So workers operated forklifts and heavy machinery to lift the enormous pumpkins and transfer them to the water. Growers and competitors then wielded sores and knives to cut the hole on the top of the pumpkin, scoop out the goopy insides with spoons and scrapers by their bare hands so you can sit inside. So you've got to do it all there. You're going to do it all there. So I guess they've got to show it's illegal pumpkin. This ain't no fake pumpkin.

Oh, like I didn't just paper mash this thing. Yes. Have you ever actually made a pumpkin thing? I've never done the Jacko' Lantern. Do you know how difficult it is, a Jacko Landon? I'm trying to think the only time I've what carved a pumpkin is to make pumpkin soup and you're not carving it and I just peel it off. Getting the innards out of the pumpkin, the seeds and the gooey stuff takes forever and it's gross. Well, I guess when you do scrape out the guts of a Jap or a Kent pumpkin, that is difficult.

Look at you with your pumpkin, Kent and Jap Pumpkin. I don't even know the difference. Lucia has a off-to-the-market book and there's a whole bloody chapter of the pumpkins. Yeah. So it's fresh in my mind. But you're right. It's funny what you pick up from a kid's book. Like blue tongue lizards, they're loners.

I know that. I like lizards. I'm going to get that book for me too. But yes, scooping out the guards to make pumpkin super leeks, imagine trying to do that with a 600 kilo pumpkin. It would be ridiculous. They'd need a team. You'd be exhausted by the time it came to actually row.

So the more innards that are removed, the light of the pumpkin becomes, giving its captain a competitive edge by allowing swift travel. This is interesting, as I read on team. We're all discovering this for the first time together. Well, not me, but yes, you educate everyone else. They have a time limit in which they've got to open the pumpkin and scoop out the unit. Oh, you can't be doing that for three hours.

No, so the more scooping out you get, the light of the pumpkin, the more chance you have of competing. And they're calling it the pumpkin captain. That's a real life peak moment. I'm the pumpkin captain of my, what do you call them? Which kind of pumpkin? Kent or cap? I'm the Kent pumpkin captain. So that five times fast, shogar.

No. It's dangerous. Come on, you Kent. Exactly. Exactly why I won't do it three times. Lean in, you, Kent. We're saying Kent shy guy. Yeah, yeah.

I know you are. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is a wool. Yeah, Kent pumpkins. That's right. Anyway, apparently it's a big thing. So, well done to our good friend who picked up the victory. That's, um, Gary?

Yeah, Gary. Yeah, Gary. Gary. To the Kent Pumpkin captain. We honor you, good sir. We salute you. Just quickly, Ducko. I'm mortified.

Yeah. I'm embarrassed. I am regretful. Oh, no. I tried to show off with my pumpkin knowledge. Yeah, you were talking about the Kent pumpkin and the Jap pumpkins. We were talking about the Oregon World's largest pumpkin competition where they dress up as characters and sail around a man-made lake in pumpkins.

And I tried to show off to you being like, what were they Japs? What were they, Kent's? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you were impressed. Well, I don't know pumpkin speak. Hey. When you want to make pumpkin soup or whatever, do you just go and go like, that's a pumpkin or buy it? I've never personally made it.

Mum's made it a few times. Have you ever bought a pumpkin? Like gone to Woolworth with the purpose? Yes, yeah, I've done that. Okay, but you're just like whatever. Yeah, just sort of, yeah. You know, there's different varieties, but who cares what they're called? Yeah.

I was trying to show off. Yeah. I just wanted to have a little Google. What were the other ones? I didn't maybe rattle off. Maybe we could have spent a bit of time on it. Yeah. Jap and Kent are not two different pumpkins.

Oh, same pumpkin. The Kent is also known as the Jap. I made out like they were two different species, and I want it on the record that I'm emotionally mature. I can put my hand up. And you can own a mistake. made a mistake. You've always been able to do that, you know. The same pumpkin.

How did that work out? So a Japanese pumpkin, obviously, I'm presuming it hails from a Japan. So I looked up Jap pumpkins, and they're probably the ones you know as a pumpkin. Like, that's a pretty stock standard. Yeah, that's what I think of. It's like the green, very round, kind of oblong, whatever. Also known as Kent. Not the one you'd see in Halloween.

No, no. The Jacko Lantern pumpkins are a whole different. I don't even know if they're edible, to be honest. They're really decorative. Yeah, yeah. But now I'm calling into question all my pumpkin knowledge. I just wanted it on the record. Kent and Japp.

Different things. One in the same. The same thing. You go to Woolies today and you learn all your pumpkins. Butter nut. I bought a butter nut. That's what I normally buy. Oh, there you go.

Kent and Jap. Yeah. Same. What's your pumpkin knowledge, Charlotte? The Big Macs is my favourite one. Oh, what's that one? Is that because it's a long boy? I don't know.

It's the first one that came up. Is that a big boy? I can see you pumping a pumpkin. Oh, Babbs would love a bag of baggy bear. Yeah, pumpkin soup. I could see you doing that on the farm. I do like pumpkin. suit, but I haven't made it myself before.

Oh, okay. I think you need a butternut. Butter nut pumpkin. Button nut for that? Yeah. Well, if you love a pumpkin and you love cash, you love us. Who's to say type of pumpkin won't be a question? Right. If it's a letter J, chat.

Is it on the quiz today? Put that on there today. Put type of pumpkin on there today. Let's see who's listening. Oh, we'll have to say what the letter is, but yeah, yeah, yeah. We need a J. Let's hope it's K and they're like, Kent. Sorry? It won't work.

Oh, okay. What do we got? Give us a letter. You want the letter? Yeah, let's go rogue today. Ar. Ar, me hearty. 13, 1060.

I, aye, captain. You heard the letter. You heard the pumpkin chat. Put it all together. Give us a cool. Win 10 credits. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alphabet on hit.

30 seconds, answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. First answer, you cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. We come back, of course, if there is time. We are playing for 10K. Our player is Cassandra. Hello, Cass. Hello, how are you?

Oh, Cass, we're pretty good. Like, we're feeling good and it's just an average Wednesday for us. We're not staring down the barrel of 10 grand like you are. So how are you feeling? Oh, I'm feeling okay. I think I might be able to do this. I'm hoping I can. I know.

Well, Shy Guy gave you the letter. Did you catch that about five minutes ago? No, because I was on hole ringing through. Well, that's the danger of calling too early. You miss any breadcrumbs. Yeah. And how are you on pumpkin knowledge? What's your favourite type of pumpkin?

We grow Queensland Blues. You grow them fantastic. I've not heard of the Queensland Blue Pumpkin. Obviously, the superior pumpkin, am I right, Cass? Yes, it's an easier one to grow. There you go. Is that good in a pumpkin soup? I'm just looking at Queensland Blue now.

Yes. Yes, I love making my pumpkin soup, so yes, they are very good in the pumpkin soup. It has that distinctive blue-grey skin and deep sort of ribbing on it? Yes, it's up. You know your pump. You know why. Queensland Blue. Yeah, well, obviously.

You know the things. Speaking of my language. Amen. All right. Cass, well, you missed it, but the letter is R. And that's solid, baby. I wish there was a pumpkin starting with the letter R. I don't know one off the top of my head, but R.

Okay. Oh, the Russian Ritz. Oh, there you go, the Russian route. It's a niche one. You might not have ever been. Yeah, you might not get it. It's a tiny breed. You ready?

Yes, I'm ready. All right, your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter R, we need you to name. A non-alcoholic drink. Red Bull. A beauty brand. Red one. An animated character.

Roger Rabbit. A school subject. Pass. A fruit. Rock melon. An adjective. Round A famous Australian

Rebecca Givney A car part Radiator A sport Racquetball An international city Roa Raura

On the buzzer What, yeah What amazing You, okay The only thing stopping you If everything is correct Which I think it is From getting 10K

was a school subject and you're going to kick yourself. Yep. Religion. Oh, I didn't do that at school. No, no. I mean, we've also got robotics in here, which must be an advanced school subject, but R.E. I did revolutions in, like, HSC. Yeah, you can do reading.

Reading. Reading. Reading we could have accepted reading. Cass, you were elite. We've not had a player as good of you since like a month ago when Sonia won the 10-K. Rebecca Gibney, bang. The funny thing, when I got online, I went, okay, let's think of things. And the words R came out, because I was to see a lot of Roger Federer.

Roger Corsa is a actor. And you didn't even say him for the famous Australian. He said Rebecca Giffin. I know, because I had female Rebecca Givis. Let me just be a lesson, though. If you do get through to Babs, you still got yourself five minutes to do some study. You might not know what the letter is. Get your head in the game.

I did research adjective when I got through. Oh, good girl, because adjective, adverb, verb and noun come up a lot and that very often trip people up. Cass, you nailed it. Cass, you don't get the money. You do get our accolades and $100 at Birkenstock. Okay, thank you. Thanks so much. You can hold your head up eye, Cass.

Can't wait to try one of your Queensland blues soon. Yeah, send them in. Send them in. Thank you. Thanks, Cass. Oh, bloody religion. Damn it. That's what, yeah.

Ah, we talk about religion a little bit on this problem. And it's definitely a subject that has studied at, you know, a lot of places. Church hym that slack. We've covered that a lot. Pooly, duly. That was wild. Well done. Well done to Cass.

Up next, we're talking tattoo regrets. We've got some doozies online. We'll do it after Taylor and Opelite. Jess and Ducko. That's my credo. No regrets. Now. No regrets.

No regrets. No one letter. These are always fun, right? are always fun because I'll even take, you know, I was 18. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And now I'm 55, you know, you can begrudge your younger self. I'm happy to take text lines if you are embarrassed to call in 04-8-8-106 line or give us a call, as we said. Yeah, you don't win no call of fame from texting.

One guy came in. Okay, so this is a Reddit thread from various tattoo parlors. Oh, so it's a tattoo artist. Tattoo artists coming in saying, like, their horror stories, okay? One guy came in and wanted a semi-truck with kick an ass and eaten. You know, I can imagine. Nice. A few days later, he came in to get alone and beating it.

Completely unaware of the irony. Now when someone's going through some tough times, I say, hey, sometimes you kick an ass and eaten, and sometimes you're alone and beating it. I mean, to each their own, it's your body, it's your choice. Why would you get that inked on you? Alone and beating it. I can see Sean having that, just railing on his hip.

And we're like, what? Underneath the big semi-trailer, obviously. I had a man come in and asked about getting a name cover that was placed right above his genitals. He brought him to a drawing of a tribal dragon that he did himself. After explaining that his drawing really wouldn't work for the area to cover up, he said, well, I guess I shouldn't have got my daughter's name there, huh? Like right above his genitals. Like, he thought he was being a good, like, oh, I'm going to get her name.

Got it, went in the mirror and went, why did I get Shelley above my... Because that, to me, I was immediately assuming X. Daughter. I understand where sperm originates from. Yep. No, I don't like it at all. You can't be doing that. I don't like it at all.

A couple tats obviously. No, I love a couple tats. Fraught with danger because breaking up. She said, I hate doing these. I was, you know, telling them the warnings about getting couple tats. She was getting hers across the lower back. And he was getting on his stomach. He was a bigger bloke and he was big.

She insisted, a lot of stomach. She insisted he went first. When he got it and the tat was finished, the girl then slapped him and said, that's for cheating on me. Now deal with that. Shut up. Oh, that is beautiful. Oh, my God.

So obviously he had just got her name tattooed and she was going to return to the tramp stamp. Yeah, yeah. That is poetry. My girlfriend's mum comes in for a tattoo off me, so the tattoo artist. Oh, can you imagine tattooing your mother-in-law? Imagine Robin comes to you and goes, Ducco, I trust you. Tattoo me Yes

She wants a giraffe Okay that's cool So I'm doing the giraffe on her bikini line A bit weird I'm a professional And then she said Giraffes have 10 inch tongues As in did she want the tongue

drawn on tattooed on? That's why she was getting the giraffe That was the symbolicness Oh Lauren has called through very quick on the phone Lauren I'm picking up That you might have a tattoo regret

I do indeed Talk to us I have a pig in mud on my hip that I got when I was 16 A pig in mud Obviously to infer You know happy as a pig in

Mud Is that the saying Let's go with that What was your motivation As a 16 year old What were you thinking My nickname was pug And I just decided

Yep bug I'll get a pig in mud. Hang on, your nickname was pug. So you got a pig in mud. Yes, yes. Sorry, am I dumb? I'm not making the connection between the pug nickname and the pig in mud.

It's just like, is it like a play on words? Well, 2016 and... Yeah. Okay, made sense in your brain. Yeah, yeah, yeah, she just got it, and then all of a sudden now we're looking at it. Sorry, where is it, Lauren, on your body? It's on my hip.

On your hip. Oh, that's why you get everyone's looking at, you don't even have a good story for it. And that's the thing every time you'd have to explain it to friends, or to family, to a new partner, and it just not even makes sense. I got one more for you, 13, 1060 calls. We'll get your calls on next. If you've got to text us.

This is a true story. A friend of mine who works in a tattoo parlor in another part of the country. Someone came in and got mischief managed on their lower back. Now, for those that know Harry Potter, for those that know Harry Potter, you'll know when you read a specific map, you need to tap it with a wand to say, mischief managed when you're done. When you're finished.

I mean, did they have a partner? Or were they just trying to attract the right partner? Well, they weren't alone and beaten it. Let's just say that much. 13, 1060. What are you got for us? You're a wizard. What do you got for us?

Tattoo regrets. It doesn't need to be dirty. It can be just like a pig and mud. Do you know what? I'll even take it if you don't regret it. If you think it's a bit of fun. Tattoos, what do you got? We'll get you on next. Death and Ducco Tattoo regret

And I'm even going to take the word regret off there Have you got something that, you know Maybe gets the piss taken out of you a bit But you're proud of it That's my credo I'll regrets You're not going to judge your 18 year old self Even though you're in your 40s now

Like you're back tat No one knows what it means Not even me We don't know if it's number 12 with black beans sauce Or if it means Carpe DM Who's to say It was in, what's it in again?

I don't even really know It's meant to be Tibetan Which I totally don't really know. It's a real language. But any time a monk is walking behind me, I make sure I turn. So they can't tap me on the shoulder being like, I know what you were aiming for. Oh. Oh, no, but that's not what it says.

I don't regret it, though. No, you don't regret it. I'm proud, baby. You were young and dumb. Amen. Some doozies on here. Plenty of people getting involved as well. There's another one, because it's a Reddit thread.

I've read plenty. But there was a stripper that came in and wanted a star tattooed on her lower region. As I was doing this, her seven-year-old son and, and, um, And husband came in to give her lunch. How long was the star taking? She needed a lunch break. You should see where it was. Here's your cassidias, boy.

Let us know when you finish. That's beautiful. We'll be at the time zone. Kyle message us on the text. 04,000. 28-106. Of course, you can always get involved on text. It says legends, obviously.

Tattoo regrets come in from the old southern cross tattoo on the calf. Yes, Kyle. I was 16. All the mates got it. Our mum sign. that decks in everything. Now we take the piss out of each other. The southern cross tats had a real moment in the sun, didn't they?

They absolutely did. I just love that a group of the boys had to all get their mums involved. Yeah, the mum's like, you've got to regret this. We'll be at the pub, boys. Come find us when you finish. Yeah, sign it away. It's fine. Let's go to Matthew.

Good morning, Matt. Good morning, guys. Legend, you have a tattoo that you kind of regret. Yeah, I've got a tattoo that says new tattoo. New tattoo. Whereabouts on your body and how big. big is it? It's on me leg, and it's about, I don't know, 5 centimetres, 10-timetres long.

I mean, new tattoo. I want to ask, what were you thinking? Yeah. It was just a bit of fun. Oh, it was COVID times, and I thought it was a good idea to buy a tattoo gun. Oh, you did it yourself or your friend did it. Yeah, the good stuff. Oh, that's a lot of trust.

You've got to put in someone. New tat. I want a new tat. Just put new tat. Just do it. It's punny and ironic. Emma, good morning. Morning, guys.

Do you have a tattoo regret, Dahl? I recently got my tattoo eyebrows because they were very blonde and now I have hairy, patchy caterpillars on my face. Okay, I mean, it's one thing to get it on your lower back, on your butt, on an ankle.

This is straight up on your face, Emma. On the eyebrows. Yeah, that's forever. Every day. She's just furiously exfoliating every night, fade, fade, fade, fade. Kyle on 131060 If my computer work

There we go Carl, your partner's cousin Got a tattoo Yeah, so he's actually got a couple One of them He got one he was in Thailand And his dad asked what it meant And it says like

It actually means it says I couldn't tell you So his dad just kept asking And he's like I couldn't tell you And then he's got another one on his hip And it says 100% Italian leather Is he of Italian descent? Yeah, who you've never paid it.

You need that, you know what, I don't hate that one, that's loud and proud. But I've got to go 50% Italian leather, 50% Maltese, love that's getting a bit wordy now. Jess and Ducke. I reckon producer Chal Guy's having a glass of milk. Glass of milk and a little biscuit, aren't you? My Mook, my Mook. My Gye Dips. I'm so excited.

I want Shy Guy's fuck. As you should be, it's time to white your whistles with a bit of Shag Guy Dips. No. That's you slurping up your breakfast. Mmm. I love Shire. guy tips. Yeah.

These are all real endorsements. It does. It gets you going. If you can guess what Mr. Shilord is trying to put down, he's very bad at describing things. We are the only program in the country. Yep.

I did a monitor. I'd say the world, perhaps. I haven't monitored to the world. I've only monitored the country. Yeah, yeah. Who is giving you the chance to not only win breakfast for the next fortnight in the form of a specific cereal, but also some JD merch.

It'd be weird if another radio station was giving way our merch. Yeah, yeah. I would mind it, though. It's Inception. Bottle opener, magnets. Yeah. Hot property light mode, yeah. All you need to do is just guess the cereal first.

Cab off the rank always gets a supplementary clue. So two clues, 131060. If you want that to be you, but shy lord, first clue today. Blue box. Oh, geez, hang on a minute. Blue box. Jeez. That's, you know.

We'll get into whether there's ribbons or not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But blue box, they ain't many with that. You know what I mean? There ain't many with that. 13, 10, 60. Yeah. As you said, Ducco, first caller gets another clue.

Yeah. And if it's as bad as that one, I might even help. 13, 10, 60. Jess and Ducco. Jess and Ducco. I reckon producer Shy guy's having a glass of milk. Glass of milk and a little biscuit, aren't you? My milk, my milk.

Shy guy dips. I'm so excited. I want Shy Guy's box. You just got to decipher a series of clues. Tell us what serial shy guy has in his hot little hand. He's told us Blue Box. Blue Box. Tracy, very quick on the phone.

Good morning, Trace. Good morning. How are you? Couldn't be better, babe. Live in the dream. We are going to give you a supplementary clue so you can put all the pieces together. Shy Guy go. Two words.

Tracy. Oh, Trace. Just give it to it, Tracy, you know? I'd like to say rat bubble. Yeah, and that is an absolute logical guess. But it is not Tracy. I feel like you had to crawl for others to walk. That's right.

Tracy, I'm going to put it on the record. has done a lot of the work there. Unfortunately, what's not doing a lot of the work is our phone system. Doug, we're good. Joel, good morning. Morning. Joel, we've heard blue box two words. Tracy guessed rice bubbles that is incorrect.

So put it together with the next clue. Joel, there is a raccoon on the box. Oh, my God. Come on, John. Is it fruit loose? Oh, we've gone a bit off on a tangent there. Joel? No, we've taken a left-hand turn when we were meant to stay going straight.

It isn't fruit loops. Let's, let's, um... Let's go to Mel. Yes. Hi, Mel. Hi, how you going? Good, babe. We've heard rice bubbles and fruit loops, both incorrect.

Let's put it together with another clue. What do you got? Hang on, hang on. I know it's wrong. Oh, no, Mel. Well, you get another clue, though, so this could pivot. Here we go. Yeah, see, I go with this, Mel.

There's a game on the back where you can draw a picture of, of said raccoon. It's a big box, too. That's a thick boy. What's the Grammage? Or is that another clue? Yeah, that could be another clue. Grammage?

Mel, blue box, two words. Mine was frosties, so I know I'm wrong. Yeah, that's not two words. Do love the good, frosties, though. Geez, they are good, aren't they? They are very. Blue box. Well done.

Very good. Glenn has called through. Good morning, Glenn. There you go. Yeah, great, babe. We've heard blue box, two words. Raccoon on the front. Picture of raccoon on the back that you can draw.

Yeah. You get another clue. Always. The cereal pieces are yellowish, creamish coloured. Oh, that is a horrible clue. That is just such a bad clue. No, Glenn's going to get it. I know it.

Oh, do you? Glenn, what is it? What is it? Come on, Glennie. Breakfast bubbles. Circling back to our first contributor, Tracy, who guessed rice bubbles. This is the Aldi cousin of Rice Bubbles, of course. Remember, we've been deep in Aldi's territory the last couple of weeks.

We have Glenn. Are you a fan of the breakfast boobel? Ah, me, sonny. Yeah, of course. Oh, I wouldn't dare touch a breakfast bubble. Not me. Only the young fella. Yeah.

So now you get a jiz bit. You get a fridge magnet. You get a bunch of Jess and ducco merch plus the breakfast bubbles. But we need you to say one line for us, Glenn. This is the important imperative for the promoter. Over to you, Jess. Glenn, we need a nice crisp and clear. Hi, my name's Glenn.

And I'm so excited. I'm excited. I just won shy guy's box. Box, hit the beat. All right, rolling, and action. Hi, my name is Glenn, and I'm so excited. I just won shy guy's box. Oh, my God. We're doing it.

Jess and Ducko. Something funny happened at dinner the other night. And, you know, you're a mum. You get it. You're not new to the game, but two years in, I suppose. Thank you. Morgan and I, what, six and a bit months in now. You always say, like, you want to be those parents who, you know,

the baby fits in. with you. The kid fits in with your lifestyle. You don't, you know, you can be relaxed, like you're not going to be structured. I'm going to be free range, baby. Yeah, but then you realize how important sleep is to children. If they don't sleep on schedule, your entire night and rest of week and month is screwed. 100%. Whoever came up with that whole concept of, you know, they'll fit in with us, was obviously pre-kid. Having a child's actually... Because you don't know what you don't know. And you don't know until you're in it. Amen. Having a child's actually taught me how important sleep is. Sounds dumb,

but how important sleep is for human beings. Like, I get it. I've always known that, but really you can see how important sleep is for us, right? So, man, we're going to have to dinner the other night. Morgan's mom, when she was in town, was minding Flo. Now, the night routine is old bath flow, and Morgan puts her down, and she goes down really well. But Morgan's mom, obviously, when the grandma comes in, as you know, they...

It's a different energy. And they get a bit more flustered if there's a bit of crying and maybe they do things the wrong, whatever, not the wrong way, they're just doing it their way. It's not what the child's used to. Yes. My mum said one of the great lines, because we were doing controlled crying. Yeah. And my mom goes, oh, yeah, I did that with you, but I'm not doing that with Lucia.

Yes. You know, the few times they've looked after. It's a sweet angel. So you're happy to do it to me. Yeah. 30 years ago. Yeah. She's like, oh, no, Lucia's different.

I mean, what? But yes, it's different with the grandparent. So we're out at dinner. And then Morgan, I can tell with some friends. And I'm enjoying myself, having a few wines. And Morgan's worrying about Flo. Oh, geez, I wonder if she's gone down. Oh, it's 730.

You haven't heard from mum. Oh, it's 8 o'clock. Oh, she can't even enjoy the night on. And I was like, honey, like, it's fine. Come on. Like, we're okay. Let's just enjoy this dinner. And you know that other people who were we with didn't have kids?

So they were kind of just like, oh, I'm sure to be cool. Whatever, not caring. No. And then Morgan said one of the great lines that we all stopped and had to check ourselves and laugh. It was really how do we get here a moment. So Flo then didn't go down until just after eight. So she'd been awake for two hours longer than she needed to. And Morgan's like, oh, oh, show me the phone.

in front of everyone, stop the conversation, mid-conversation, and she, like, really was like... She wants you to be as worked up as she was. Yeah, and I wasn't, because I was like, man, it's what I hate, we're off the clock. You know what I mean? My watch has ended. I'm not going home now to fix this, whatever. Yeah. And then I said, Morgan, like, it's okay.

And then she goes, I'm a mother and it is my child. And then we all stopped and looked at each other. And I just started bursting out laughing. Did she hear the words? Then she started laughing. And she was like, I've just heard what I've said, and all these people around us who don't have kids have heard what we've said. And everyone's like, started laughing. It does do something too. I appreciate. And then

you have this out-of-body experience. Like, did I just... It is my child. And I was like, well, okay. Yeah, it's our child. I get it. You're the mother. She's not sleeping. But she's... The responsibility is on my shoulders. Totally. Yeah. It was so funny. And then Robin, you know, her mom is like, I am the grandmother. Jess and Duckow. You're about 17 minutes away from potentially winning $10,000 with Alpha Bucks. Oh, God, that would be good.

Actually, that had really come in handy if you're in the middle of a renovation, which would have to be top two of the reasons people give that they want to play Alpha Box because they're doing a reno, maybe bathroom, kitchen, maybe backyard. You know, I'm in the middle of one at the moment, Ducko. Yeah, now, this thing's bigger than Ben Hurd, the money's gone up a lot. The time limit's gone up. It was meant to be done by the end of the year. We're looking at maybe February March.

We're living in an apartment now. So we've started to order appliances because there's a couple of deals. bills going around where it's like, buy an oven, get a free range hood, but only until the end of October, it's like, well, we've got to, we've got to book it in now. But, you know, the lead time is not delivery till fair, but I'm like, okay, so where are we pulling money from this account to that credit card to this? There's only so many flypoints that can go around, you know? You're so right.

I get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I went to go pay the deposit on this oven range hood deal. God, that's depressing stuff. Like, some people get their rocks off to that, but geez, are you just going, bro, the invoices. are insane. And yes, I'm very lucky to be in a partnership where my husband has taken. I'm going to say 99% of the mental load with this.

So I tried to put my hand up. I'll organise the oven and the rain chort. I'm going to get this deal for us, babe. And he went, what card are you going to pay it on? I went, the card. I was like, he's like, no, you've got to use X, Y, Z. I'm okay. Now it's going over my head.

You're going to have to pick this up. But the issue is doing something as big as a project like this with someone like me, because I'm shooting all over the place. He's like, there is an order and a procedure. And I'm jumping the gun. I already want to talk about backyard. He went, mate, we haven't even picked where the toilet's going to go in the bathroom. Why are you talking about backyard?

That should be. Last. That's last. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If even in this project, do you know what I mean? You might not have enough money for backyard. That could be a couple years away. Whereas I'm earmarking the different fruit trees I want to plant.

Of course you are. You know what Angus needs to do? Just let you run with it and let you just put. plan away. Just let me say stuff. Sure, honey. However, the reason he wants to catch it now is because the last time I didn't consult him on a fruit tree, I planted a fig tree in our backyard.

Now, if anyone knows fig trees, they are quite girthy. They are quite tall. The root system is hectic. It goes everywhere. It goes everywhere. I grew up with a fig tree in my uncle's house, Uncle Fernando. Fernando fig tree fits. It fits.

And he had a humongous backyard with the one. fig tree, it took up the whole backyard, I go. And I wanted to honour his memory. I wanted figs on tap. So I planted this thing and Angus went, it's going to pull up the sandstone. The root system's going to go into the neighbour. I went, ah, it's a problem for later.

But Fernando, when I flat. He's looking at down upon their fig tree. The fig tree's a good man because I think Fernando's blessed them. But I've recently discovered... Yeah, here we go. What's new? It's a Maltese fruit. In Maltese, it's called Naspi. but it's a low quots.

Are you familiar with low quots? No, are they related to cum quots? They actually aren't, which is a while. I know, it's a similar name. But I went, oh my God, low quots are so good. What do they do? Are they edible? They are.

They're almost like, imagine an unfurry apricot. So they're small, they're beautifully tart. And I saw them at the farmer's market and sent them to my Maltese babysitter and went, oh my God, Marissa. I found the spleen. And she said, you should grow. They would grow really well in your climate. So I came home and said to Angus, I'd like to honour my Maltese roots with a loquot tree.

And Angus is going between that and the fig tree. There's no freaking room to grow another ethnic food. You're not going to eat the loquots. They look disgusting. Bro, I eat loquots every week. I buy them from the farmer's market. Really? I'll bring you in a low quop.

Ah. Do you just eat it like a little, like do you eat it? Like, do you raw dog in that thing? I just raw dog a baby. And I'll have to, I do cut them in half a luchy here because that pip is obviously. Obviously, a trojan has it. Look, I can't judge a loquot before I try it. You never had a nusspley.

Yeah, no. You didn't grow up with a Maltese babysitter. A lot of people haven't, yeah? Yeah, I don't think a lot of people know what you're talking about. Why does the farmer sell them at the market? I'm not the only one who buys them. Can you bring us a low quart next week? I would love to put.

I would love a lot of apricot peach and citrus. Yes, it's a beautiful, slightly tangy. Yeah, slightly tangy, yeah. I just, but Angus is sort of flaggy. No, we're not having this ethnic. Why not just a lemon tree? You know, you love lemons. I've got a lemon tree.

Yeah, but are you going to put that in the backyard? Yeah, but that's, but that's in a pot. This can't go in a pot? No, the Loquot can't go in a pot. I wanted to be next to the, I wanted to be like a, like a pocket of Europe in the backyard. I want to be next to the fig tree. A pocket of Europe to you, though. I really want to do a heritage thing on her and just see how much percentile she is.

Because I reckon it's less than 10. I'm so multi, so I was like, between the, the fig was voted. I've got more Italian to me than you. Oh, then you should get the... I'll dig up the fig tree. You know what you've just volunteered to self out. Yeah, come get mine. You're going to have the fig tree.

You should have the fig tree. Maybe you've got some Maltese in your too. I'll get you a low quat. Yeah, give me a low quat. We can propagate from my lowquot to your backyard. Mate, I kill natives that can't be killed in this climate, so I don't know how I can be trusted. Marissa, my Maltese babysitter, she said,

Nuss, please, good for our climate. So I reckon it'll take in your backyard. Jess and Ducco. We need to take a trip to China, Ducco. Oh, are we going to... China? China. China. China. I've been saying China. China. China. China. China. Sorry, he's just... Is Trump talking particularly about the Fujian province?

I believe he is. Good, because that's where we are in particular. China's obviously a big nation. We are in the Fujian province. Yeah, of course. Unbelievable scenes unfurling at a restaurant. Stone pot seafood restaurant. Always, always like the seafood swimming around that you know you're about to eat. The freshness is key.

at the Stonepot seafood restaurant they have a giant aquarium in the middle of the restaurant full of fish which I assume patrons walk over and go that guy and then the waiter comes and grabs it out of it and goes

no worries will be within 10 minutes out of nowhere CCTV has captured the moment the fish tank exploded what that was glass and water yeah I got it that was a fish tank that's CCT TV

This is it. I'll play it one more time. No one had poked it. No one had touched it. There was no obviously C4 involved. It just out of nowhere. That would be scary. Obviously for the fish, first and foremost.

I love that your first concern was the fish. They're just swimming about doing their fag. And then all of a sudden, bang, not they're getting eaten. They're getting washed upon the restaurant. Hang on a minute. There was no human intervention that we can see. Do you reckon it was an inside job? One of the fish.

This could be what it was. This was a breakout because. Because patrons who've now spoken to Chinese media have gone, you could see the fish like swimming away because it was a tidal wave of water. And then others quipped that the rest... Where would they swim to? Yeah. Just the other end of the tank.

Escape. Yeah. And then they're like, hey, guys, one fish had the idea. If we break this glass, we'll all get out. Everyone's like, Gary, I think we're going to run out of oxygen. And Gary's like, no, guys, trust me. Other patrons quipped the restaurant's ingredients were so fresh. They're swimming over to the tables by themselves.

Oh, yeah. It wasn't immediately clear how much damage the restaurant had suffered, but there you go, guys. If you've got an aquarium or a fish tank in your midst... There you go. Could explode if the fish, if the fish are unhappy. I've always wondered what that would be like at a restaurant if that happened. Like, would it hurt?

Would it be a bit of fun because there's sort of water and fish getting around everywhere? It is literally litres and litres and litres of worse. Oh, those things... The volume of water those fish tanks hold is just remarkable. It's a tidal wave. But the reason that we really wanted to touch on this, Jess, now... We needed a segue, ducker. We did this, our fish tank here, obviously your fish,

rest in peace. Valais. It's up with Dr. Fernando, just hanging out. Talking about the fig trees. Eating figs. Yeah. So our fish tank, I went, I walked past this morning and I always come past and say, morning fish, like they always see.

Yeah, you do. You do a gala. You be quiet. And you tap on the glass. Morning fishies. Daddy loves you. And then I go back and I go on my day. No, no.

You only said it to your fish and you flip off all the other fish. Yeah, yeah. I hate you, I love you, big guy. I went, I went this morning. I saw the tank looks like it has been urinated in. It is that yellow. Babbs, what have you been doing? What are you been doing, Babs?

Why do I have to clean the fish tank? Are you joking? You know, we got fish because you wanted them. Ducco tried to clean it the other day. Um, excuse me. Ducco touched the cleaners the other day and you literally don't touch me cleaners. Smacked his hands away.

So what? To be fair, he then let it go. The magnet fails. That's right. Whenever he touches it, the magnet under, like, and then I have to stick my hand in the fish tank. Because then I get bored and I walk away. And then he goes, what, whoops.

Hey, great impression. Great me impression. Um, so, what. Why is it so yellow? And are we going to get them cleaned? And how many times have we had that tank cleaned? I have to clean it, but it takes 50 minutes. Well, it took us 50 minutes when we did it.

It was really fresh. To be fair, I just filmed you doing it. You were helping? You got 40-hour work weeks to fill, guys. You can't be cleaning the fish tank? Yeah, that'll add 41. Oh, chuck a timesheet in. Because you've got to drain the water, don't you?

You have to, like, scoop out old water and put, yeah, new water in the conditioner and then clean all the filters. and get all the gunk out and stuff. So if our fish don't ever explodes, Ducco, we know it's bad, just being like, I'm sick of this job. You know, it's funny. It sits behind her, so we'd only explode on her.

She'd be out there. We probably wouldn't even know it's soundproof in here. Jess and Ducco in the morning. Jess and Ducco's 10K Alfa Bucks on hits. You have 30 seconds and 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. Have to take your first answer.

You cannot use the same. game answer twice. If you're unsure of the question, you can say pass. We come back, of course, if there is time. I say that twice a day, every day, Monday to Friday. Yeah, and some people still don't acknowledge the 30 seconds. Yeah. Some people talk it through and eat up their own time. I think it's a really pivotal thing. You don't have all day. You don't have all day. Sarah, you don't have all day to win 10 grand, okay? Yeah, perfect. You understand the assignment. Yes, I do. What are you going to spend 10 grand on?

I have a three months old. We're renovating and we're planning our wedding for April. No, Sarah. That's way too many big life things in one hit. Duck, I know $10,000 is a lot. I don't know how Sarah is going to make. That's going to stretch that. Three month old in the trenches,

you're renovating, which is the worst thing people can do, and you're planning a wedding while you're postpartum. That is just... That's a lot. Madness. Crazy, right? Yeah, that's madness. How's the motivation levels for the wedding after having a kid?

I've always wondered that. We want to do it so that, you know, know, get it out of the way before we try for another one. Yeah. Okay. Motivation is timing. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Well, let's get your 10 grand and we'll see what you can do with it. Let's see that. The letter you're going to work with today, Sarah, we're going near the top of the alphabet. It's B. Oh, yeah. It's a baby. Okay.

Yeah. Yeah. All right. She likes it. Your time will start after the first question. You're ready? Yeah. Starting with the letter B, we need you to name a school subject.

Biology. A horror movie. Pass. A shoe brand. A periodic element. Oh. Pass. A ball sport?

Basketball. Something in the kitchen. Oh my gosh. A band? Exactly. Yeah, Backstreet Boys, in there on the buzzer. Nice. We can tell the stress is getting to you.

You got yourself. Three, yeah. Three, yeah. Three. Look, that was, we always knew we were up against it with everything you had going on in your life. Because a horror movie, Beetlejuice, that could be tough. A shoe brand, we're giving it away to you right now. $100 to spend a burkenstock.

Birkenstock's what you're after. Do you talk about burqs a bit. A periodic element. Boutanian. Of course, one of the great. Boutanian. Could have been, I would have accepted Boutanium. I would have accepted Boutanium.

We're about an ailment. Or boron. Oh, boron. Let's not forget boron. Sorry, guys' favourite. And something in the kitchen, I mean, there's a few, a bowl, a blender. You really could have said anything there. You could have said, Brandon.

Yeah, Brandon. Oh, Braden. Sorry, Briden. Yeah, yeah. Briden. Disrespect. Brighton. Brayden.

Look, Sarah, you do get $100 spend of Burke. I'm sorry, that is not going to be a wedding. That's not going to be anything for the child. I guess you could wear the burks. We could take care of your wedding shoe if you want to wear the burks. Yeah, wear the burks. Do they come in, why? white?

Yep. There you go. There's a wedding shoes. Covered. A boho wedding. At least the recovery shoe. Yeah. Yes.

Yes. Dancing shoe. Yeah, that's right. Dancing shoe. Thank you, Sarah. Good luck with that massive to-do list. Go with everything. Thank you so much, guys.

Have a good one. We play again tomorrow, as I mentioned. 6.30 and 8 o'clock for $10,000. Up next, though. Oh, B for blood. Be for bleed. Where did you? Bleed.

You won't believe one member of the team What they did yesterday in a beautiful space. And where they bled from? Just, there's a lot to unpack next. Oh, Bifabbs. It's really working on a lot of levels. Jess and Ducco. Taylor Swim.

God, she's just doing things, isn't she? Favitha. Poor Ophelia. Do we know Babs, just you're the Taylor Swiftie. I'm sort of second tier. What is Ophelia's resentment? Like, what is that? Where's that come from?

Did we discuss it comes from Hamlet? Shakespeare. Is that what she means? I thought Ophelia could be like a code, you know? No. Wow, well, the fate of Ophelia, because Ophelia, I think, came to some, yeah, some bad conclusion. Spoilers, guys. Sorry.

Don't want to ruin Hamlet for you. Something, Ophelia, you know, didn't turn out too well. Yeah, yeah. It's a metaphor for tragedy. And she's saying, you saved me from. It's actually a love song. So Travis saved her from tragedy. But not that being single's tragedy.

Thank you. What a wonderful spin. You should tweet Taylor. Yeah. Should respond? Right now. Oh, right now. Let's get down to business team. Come on.

We've got that $500 to spend at Reflections holiday parks. It's a call of fame. Shy guy just had a... I just saw a light bulb. A light bulb went over Shy Guy. There's a Veronica song that we could play. Oh. That would stick perfectly in the past.

Oh, perfect. We'll do it in the next point. Yeah, we'll do the next one. The call of fame, of course, up for grabs. 13, 10, 60. Where'd you believe? And that is open to interpretation. You bled.

Babs? Babs? Where'd you bleed? Oh, let's get Babs out of these. She's in my therapy tent. Get out of here. Get out of there, Babs. We're going to talk.

Come on out. All right. We're going to talk to you. There's her to come. Oh, my God. This is what happens when you eat curry tosses every day for two weeks. You got a mouth full of now. Look good, feel good.

Hey, I preach, Ophelia. That's what Ophelia said right before she carked it. That was cause of death. That's on the death certificate. Carrot sausages. Did the curate sausages make you believe? Yesterday we had a photo shoot for marketing photos for this team. And then Jess and I being the grape of we are, said, hey, let's get the young ones in.

Come on. Let's get some group shots. Let's get a group photo. So when we eventually go number one, Ducco, it's a team sport. We have a photo of the four of us. We are number one, Jess. Depends where you look. Well, that's fair.

That's very fair. That's very, love that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We can have a group photo where we look cohesive, not just one of us, you know, at our various events, maybe something where we're all tied in together. We're all wearing similar things. Yes.

So we all put on the matching denim with the white, you know, a la family photos circa 1999. We get Babs and Shy Guy involved. We're taking a few cute picks, hugging, awkward prom style. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then out of nowhere, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip on the white background and floor. Like the perfect white background and floor.

It's in a studio. It's a photography studio dedicated for this purpose. So it is pristine white. What is this bright red blood? Yeah. The pose that had preceded us seeing the bright red blood was the jump shop. We're all trying to do the Toyota jump. Yeah.

We'd take it about six goes at it because shy guy doesn't know how to jump. Shai guy can't jump. He can't tuck his knees for some reason. His legs. What's that white boy can't jump? Yeah, yeah. He could not jump. He was fearful of going through the roof.

We understand he's tall. But we've all come down, seen the blood. I'll be honest with you. I went, I'm wearing jeans. How has that gotten out of me? Yeah, yeah. I looked down. I was like, geez, who's bleeding?

First thing, I looked over at you two, and I was like, uh-oh. How was it gotten out of jeans? I hadn't taken me spanks off either. That was a hell of a driplet to have escaped that. I would have expected that at your postpartum photo shoot we did. That's very fair. But not now. Because you got on my back at one point.

I did. That was scary times. But there was no driplets there. Yeah, yeah. So we've kind of all looked at Babs. Was it you? And then Babbs looks down at her toe. What toe was it?

It was my pinky toe. Your pinky toe was sliced. Yeah, I'd sliced up in my toe. And there was blood everywhere. And it was like, you had such bright red blood. No. Oxygenated. Yeah. If House, the medical, obviously, documentary drama has taught me anything.

Very bright red blood, highly oxygenated. Our photographer did have a glass panel on the floor to reflect light. You know, it's a technical thing. And to stand behind. Babbs jumped on the glass. Didn't even jump. You know, you know how you have no sensitivity in your nips? Yeah, yeah.

Have you got no sensitivity in your pinky toe? Maybe I was just having so much fun. You were just in the zone. Or you were just completely, you were washed over with anxiety. Yeah, maybe I feel anything. Yeah, maybe I was like, hanging by a threat. We all looked at ourselves to see who's hurt or injured. We were, it was Babs's toe.

There's blood everywhere and there's more blood now underneath her foot. So as she's walking on this white studio. Blood's going everywhere. So it was that awkward. Like Babs and Shago rush off and Babs is going in a state of shock. Shaggo's trying to help Babs. And Jess and I kick him. into parent mode.

We really did. I cannot believe. It was actually quite amazing. I'm not. Well, I literally had just walked off the thing and next minute someone's handing me like, here's a towel, here's a bandaid. And then I look over and you guys are just scrubby. I'm like, wow, okay.

I was worried about the integrity of the floor and not getting our bond back because it was so white and I was like, oh, blood stains. I can't believe though, Dougger, like, I am a little bit. I'm not a germapho, but I'm relatively squeamish. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And cleaning up blood, like, I don't know what Babs has got. someone else is nothing. No, that's fair, but like, it's blood, man.

I'm pretty sure they don't. They actually, I'm pretty sure that's silly from us. It was probably pretty bad. I think it's pretty bad. Did you tell your wife you did that? Like, she is in the medical fear. I mean, we washed her hands after him. I didn't get, oh, man, I bloody cut some more cheese off the cheese board.

And then I saw you washing yours. Yeah, just as eating the cheese, everyone said, I'll bet I'll wash my hands. And I was like, I'm not having the camera bear now, am I? Yeah, don't touch the camember. I'd tainted that with her, whatever she had. But there was blood all through the studio. We all had to clean it. It was one of those awkward moments with the photographer just had to stop,

and we all had to stop down. I almost wanted to say, capture this. Yeah. Talk about team. Yeah. It's one thing for us to do the Toyota jump. True. Look at us cleaning up the young one's blood.

How did you feel? Was that a nice moment for you? It was also really stressed because I felt gross that you were cleaning up my blood. Yeah, you could tell you were stressed. And I went, Jess messaged me yesterday. I was like, I'm sorry. Like, I feel really bad. Oh, did you do a follow up?

To be honest, well, not about the tone. I wanted to make sure she'd thrown away the Guzman and didn't leave the trash at the studio. Did you clean up? And then I said, how was that toe, by the way? We got a band, and to your credit, you trooped through and we got it going. Yeah. And we did it again. And I text the owner of the studio.

I said, hey, there might be some red driplets around. We did our best. If there's any issues, please tell me. I'll send Babs in to do another round of cleaning. And he went, no, we actually were due to repaint. So I saw J. That's lucky. Which I had a conversation about him, like about that.

Repainting. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. An hour before I did that. It was good to see, like, everyone kicking a gear, though, because you went silent and And you were just like, Babs. And then Chaghani was just like spending, I know, five minutes looking in every cupboard for a band-aid. And Jess and our parents just clinging the studio.

I was very proud of how we all handled the situation. In the face of adversity. Yes. Just like aphelia. Just like aphelia. We stepped up. You are Ophelia, Babs. You know what you say to us?

You saved my heart from, sing it. Sing it. Sing the line to us. You saved my heart from Fed of Phile. You're welcome. You're welcome. Where'd you bleed on 13, 10, 60. Yeah.

Who came to your bloody rescue? Oh, who came to your blood? Bloody rescue. Never a good time to bleed, but there's some worse than others. Jess and Duckow. 131060, bleed is your night. To bleed is to be human, duck. To bleed or not to bleed?

Oh, that is the question. Where'd you bleed? Babs bled our photo shoot on a perfectly white canvas. While we're wearing white teas and jeans doing awkward family photos, we had to stop the photo shoot for what was the best part of an hour. It really wrapped up the shoot early, wouldn't you say? There's a couple more things I wanted to do, but I went on. It killed the momentum.

Blood rule. Blood rule. Yeah, yeah. And then Shaga. An umpire ran out of nowhere, blew the whistle and went, blood rule, send her off. She had to go off. Shagga then was putting it on his thumb trying to make us all blood brothers and sisters. And we're like, no, mate.

He pulled out a dagger and got real weird for a second. Yeah, his eyes glazed over. But you know what? It showed me. She's a human. She bleeds blood. She bleeds blood, baby. And it wasn't that time of the month.

It was toe blood. It was toe blood. And you and I, I think, the real takeaway, yeah. Very proud of us. We kicked in. into gear. Parents.

More because we didn't want a dead stung with a cleaning fee. But we kicked into gear and cleaned up someone else's blood, which I actually don't think they recommend. I think it's quite unsanitary. We didn't touch it. We had like towels and stuff that washed our hands, but yeah. Blood rule man. Courtney, good morning.

Good morning. Where'd you bleed? I went to see Beetlejuice the musical first preview night in Melbourne. And I walked around. the back after the show to go meet the cast to get them to sign myself and on the way I ate it and fell down and ripped open my knee and started bleeding all down the leg on my nice stress and it still made it around to meet the cast and I'm like can you please sign my thing and they're like you're bleeding and I'm like yeah let's not focus on that beetle juice

I just want your signature shut up beatle juice and sign me yeah it's that's kind of like a horror vibe I would have thought maybe could have gone away with that. Like, I'm fully in character here. Just on my knee. Seeing blood any time, though, on someone, you automatically panic. I know. You can't help it. Chuck a band-aid on that, thanks.

Gabby, good morning. Good morning. Where's dad bleed? My dad actually bled meeting all of my mum's record exec colleagues. She was working at a record company. First time he was meeting them all, they went to a gig. He showed up in a full tuxedo and white shirt. and he was so bored during the gig

that he managed to rip one of his own teeth out, which caused a huge amount of blood to come out of his mouth and down his shirt, so his white shirt became blood red. And that was the point that, you know, mum got to introduce her six-foot-six husband covered in blood to all of her colleagues. Why had he rub his own tooth out? I think it was like one of the baby teeth that had never come out

and it was wiggly and he was bored and he just sat there wiggling it until it came out. Doug, I've been bored before. Never to the point, Rufford. You know, I would have learned to say me. Rip it out of tea. Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's when you know you really want to get out of a meeting.

Like, are you at like an Aussie Osbourne gig, you know, back in the day? Like, at what gig? You're not seeing Olivia D and going, I'm going to rip out a tooth. Not for O'D, not for Olivia D. No, it's got to be part of the vibe. Yeah. People who bite the head of bats and stuff. Yeah.

Daniel, hello. Hi, how you going? Good, Dan. Fantastic, Daniel. Where'd you bleed? Downstairs, I'm in manhood when I was about seven years old. No, dear. We never liked these stories.

What happened? I was getting ready for a little athletics, wide shaw, green shirt, and I went down to my friend's place down the road, jump the fence, and I was getting on their trampoline. We'll have a good old time. And they had these two big black dogs, huge. It looked like bears. Anyway, one of them jump up on the trampoline and bit me.

Oh. On the crown jewels? On the who, huh? On the crown, yeah, on the crown jules, that's it, right? And the owner of the house came out and said, oh, you. bleeding. I had to go home anyway. I was walking up the road and when my white pants weren't white anymore. Amen.

They were a bit. And I got home and shaved me muff and she said, I think I got a band-aid that's going to fix this. I might have to go to hospital. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, they don't want a band-aid there. And also, you don't do lifelong damage to Little Daniel. That's right. No. Was there anything wrong

permanently or did we just get that thing stitched up? Just got it stitched up, about four or five stitches and on my way. Oh my God. That dog's going We can play Crack the Egg. Surely there was a nickname. Did you get a nickname from that, Daniel, from your friends? No, I didn't tell too many people.

Yeah, fair, that's fair. Never got on our house again. No, absolutely not. Hanging out with that dog. No way. Marie, wrap this up for us, babe. Where'd you bleed? Hi, yeah.

I live on a small property and there was a lot of maintenance to do. So I had a large hedge trimmer. so I was trimming and I stepped forward and cut into my legs what are you doing like you're holding it down or something yes

go low and you know like you had the action of moving forward with one of your legs and I just cut through the hedge into my legs so there's blood like I spray painted

the whole greenery oh my God with a freaking hedge trimmer yeah I got to the front door, wrapped it up in a towel, which was white, that made me panic more. I thought, I've hit an artery. I'm going to die.

So I thought, I'll drive myself to the hospital, and I thought, no, I won't because I'll bleed your death on the way. Jeez, you're thinking a lot in this moment. There's a lot of interesting thoughts. I feel like we're eating up time as well. By this age, it's been 45 minutes. She has no bloodline. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I rang an ambulance. and they came because blood was just spurting, you know, like you lift your hand off with the towel and it just kept burning. Oh, geez. I cut a muscle.

So, yeah, that's my farmer story. Oh, mate, that's what a head strimmer will do to a leg. That's why don't use head trimmers? No way. I was scared about it. What was the recovery on the muscle cut? Um, oh, it was good over a month. I still got that scar to remind me every time I have a shower or I'll have short.

So, yeah, it's... Yeah, you're just letting the hedges grow, I reckon. You're not trimming those bad boys again. Jeez, that's a horrific bleed. It's like, Marie, geez, your hedges are getting out of control. Last time I used the hedge trimmer. Yeah, cut me muscle. Yeah, make you feel a bit better, Bats.

Yeah, Bab, sure you're feeling better now. They feel way worse stories than, yeah. Yeah, I feel okay. Good. That's good. Well, good chats, everyone. Jess and Ducco. You're going to educate us, Ducco.

Yes, I am. Renovation and the trends. Oh, my God, take me back to the 90s, baby. Changing Rooms. Changing Rooms is Susie Wilkes. That's where I used to get all my inspo from. I was 11. I had nothing to renovate, but my God, that show, full of ideas.

Yeah, so this has been a list. Now, this isn't via experts. This is just what people are saying in forums online. We've collated lots of different forums. BuzzFeed, Reddit, you name it, home design. Everyone's got an opinion just because you're not Shane ablaze. It doesn't mean you can't drop in your two cents. Some of them I agree with.

Some of them I do not. Let's go through. Luxury vinyl flooring. It's gross under your feet. getting that vinyl flooring. People say, I don't like how it is. Also, it looks tacky. Save money until you can get afford real wood.

Yeah, see that is a big call. I have vinyl flooring in my house. My whole house is vinyl flooring. Because the price difference. Yeah. And it looks good. It's easy to clean blood. You just wipe that stuff up.

It's so easy, Pam. That is a huge discrepancy in cost. You save up and afford real wood. All white kitchens, because they look like an autopsy room, people are saying. You know how. how I feel about colour, Duck. Oh, so yes, all white people gravitate to things that are neutral, as we touched on, for resale value.

I would argue you're the one who has to live and use that kitchen. Yeah, yeah. So why wouldn't you have a pop of colour to make it more you guys? Yeah. Yes. Now, I don't know about this one. I like an electric fireplace. Like, I don't mind.

What are they're on the out? Yeah, they just don't look right. We want to go back to wood. Yeah, but you can't. I mean, electric fireplaces are easy. I couldn't agree more. And they look kind of nice now, TV above it. We're actually looking at.

fireplaces at the moment. A reel or electric? Well, isn't it funny? The judgment in my head, I thought I loved the idea of a reel. Yeah, hard though. Till my husband, who grew up with a reel went the wood, the cleanliness. And the smell. That whole room. You need to put it in a separate room. We've got a little one. Yeah. You know, let alone the dog.

Electric, I think, is the way to go. That seems very snooty, that one. Yeah, yeah. Gray and gray and gray with a splash of white. It's like an office lobby. Absolutely. Again, people think neutral is safe. It's so boring. I mean, your house is going to look like something out of a librarian's dream. You should see. An art teacher's design. You should see the wallpaper choices to go. Wallpaper. Wallpaper's on here. It's funny because we have an interior designer and her one brief, at least from my

perspective, was no grey, no white, no beige. Right. Hidious large ceiling fans in bedrooms. I mean, aircon obviously ducted aircones in, whatever. Sometimes you need a ceiling fan. I was going to say, what's the alternative there? Okay, so just investing in. in a split system or ducted. Yeah, I suppose. Or like my husband is going to do today. He said, I'm going to bunny's buying a pedestal. Yeah, pedestal fans.

Where does that fit into your interior design? Yeah. What about this? I don't, what's a pot filler tap? Don't tell me these are out. Yeah, apparently. Oh, no. Waste of money.

Hang on, this is number one. This was number one on my kitchen plan. So a pot filler is literally an extendable arm, itchy a kitchen seat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Attached to the splashback. So when you are boiling a pot of water, let's say for your pasta.

God forbid you turn around and put in the kitchen. It does feel a bit unnecessary. Take the two steps. No, I make, I'm doing it every day, literally. I saw it the first time. In Jess's house, it's 48 steps. It's that big. It's an extendable arm so you can tuck it away.

It'll be flush to the wall. And then when you need it, you pull it out. It's instant boiling water duck. Oh, instant boiling water. That changes it. Oh, right. That I would like. Thank you.

I thought it's just water. I was like, well, that doesn't make sense. No, you get it. Well, I guess maybe that could be a version. But to save you time and energy, it's essentially a zip tap right over your stove. So you go, we have zip taps here at work, which is ice cold or boiling water, and it's so good. Fantastic. So you imagine that right over your stove.

I saw it in Kendall Jenner's house tour a couple of years ago. Of course you did. And you're basing your house off that one. I said, hey, if it's good enough for Kendall, it's good enough for me. A zip tap. No, no, not the zip. Well, yeah, but the pot filler. I don't.

Yeah, of course you don't know. I just said that's my one non-negotiable. And then lastly, which are the minimalistic all-white look in general, people are saying it's boring, has no personality, no one likes that. Someone else had, a few people have voted for glass, shower doors and walls, but like glass. Being on the house? Yeah, glass shower doors are the way to go. Sorry, the alternative is what, a shower curtain, which are the most moldy, mm-hmm, mouldy, tacky, ugly. There's no glass or curtain, it's just.

Yeah, we've got nothing in our shower, so we've got like it sort of, it's an inlet that goes in and it's stone around the side. So you've got a deep enough cavity. But also, sometimes you need that glass to come. So when the drafts don't get in, you know, particularly in winter. You want to feel like you're in a cocoon. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Without any door. I love a double shower head and a couple of seats.

Of course you do. I'm only two shower heads and two seats, mate. It's a party. This is not for a solo shower. You're picking up what he's putting out. No, you're not. Jess and Ducko. It's been a great show so far.

Hell of a Wednesday. Wednesday. The hardest of the days to spell, you know? We gave away breakfast bubbles. We did. I mean, that's a, that's a hell of a Wednesday. Great Wednesday. And also hot Wednesday today, tops of 39 in some parts.

Also, very windy, high fire danger. Exactly. So to our analogue dart. Yeah, smokers. Yeah. Now you'll be flicking your butts out. Don't flick your butts out. Never flick your butts out.

You've always said that. I've been a big anti-but flicker. You always have. For a while. Remember the ads that came out? Nobody smokes here anymore. I don't. We're not trying to get people off cigarettes.

Yes. Do you remember the ad, don't be a tossing? Yeah, don't be a toss-up. I thought they were very effective. Yeah, yeah, they were good. But you've got your friends, Jess and Ducker, here. Just a gentle reminder. It's going to be windy and hot.

8 p.m. tonight, it's still going to be up there, upwards of 28, 30 degrees. How many people go on a bunnings today to buy a pedestal fan, you reckon? Geez, the energy bills today are just going to go off through the roof. Oh, do you reckon your solar can handle it. Hopefully the grid. I can go off grid. Yeah, I'm going to go off grid. Yeah, you're going to go ahead of your bare grills.

You're going to be drinking your own pee soon. I already do that. That's just because I like the taste. And you can't judge me for that. I'll call your patches. I'll hold him then. Why? Because I like the taste.

I'm not going to hear myself with a niche thing because I won't niche. No, geez, son, you're about as useful as a favorite lollipop. I mean, you can't. You can't do the line and not say it. I know, but it's 8.50. Oh, you can't say it. I'm sorry, I went down the wrong rabbit home. I'll do it in the podcast.

Let's do it. Let's do our favorite dodge ball. Oh, gee. Oh, no. Get your beaver. The beaver. God damn you, Bernice. God damn you Bernice.

God damn you Bernice. God damn you Bernice. Is it a beaver tranquiliser or a horse tranquiliser? When you said, get your beaver, I must sit when I was confused. That's very fair. And the fact that she was like, why don't you know what I'm saying? I thought we were jiving. We often are.

I was close to just going, here I am, blanket. That's tomorrow's podcast. That's tomorrow's podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, hell of a show. As you said, our podcast lives on the listener app or wherever you get your pods. We'll be back tomorrow. More chances at the call of fame.

More chances at Alpha Bucks. Jesus, we had a nine today. We had a nine. It was close. I can feel it. Very impressive. We're going to go off soon. Get the streamers ready.

Get the pom-poms ready, Shy Lord. I can feel it happening. Yep. And what are you up to today, buddy? Apart from your big work day, what do you got on? No, no plans, yeah. We'll start diary prep, I reckon, today, Oh, diary prep, I reckon.

This is less to do tomorrow. Since he got rebranded into producers diary. Since I got rebranded into producers diary, shy guy has taken this thing so seriously. Oh, absolutely. But also, I feel like he's taking his foot off the gas. Oh, he's making Babs do more work. Because now he's got a little bud to shoulder.

the load. I already do enough work. I know I do. Yeah, you do. And I actually did more last week. Do you think you do the lion's share, Babs? Like, is he getting the credit when you're really the worker be? Of course.

Yeah. You know, like, the analogy about the duck on water. Yep. And the smooth sailing duck, that's shy guy. But underneath the service, Babs is those legs. I would actually say you and me in the duck and these two are the legs. Can't argue with that. Take shy guy under the surface as well.

You couldn't be more accurate. All the glory, all the attention. Here we go. How far off, do you reckon we are rebranding the show? Jess, Ducco, Shy Guy and Babs. Oh, man, it's a tough sell. On the mornings. I'd be like, oh, you got Jess Ducco, Shy Guy and Babs at 7.38.

That's the way they call it a crew. Oh, what do you mean, Jess Ducko and crew? No, no, it's just the morning crew. Oh. The zoo, yeah. So no one gets a name. I see what you're saying. I got you.

I got you just have a collective term understood. Can't be that. Hey, you got the crew, man. Yeah. Crew, yeah, yeah, yeah. What about, like, What about Jess and Ducko and the Funky Bunch? Oh, I love that.

Hello, then Mark Wahlberg can get involved in Sue us. The Funky Bunch can come and go. Like, you know what I mean? If Shire Guy leaves us, we get a new shy guy. Does it actually matter? Yes, smart from us. I don't think it matters. Yeah, no, you don't want to be naming the show anyway, do you?

No. You don't want to be part of the Funky Bunch? No, I am the Funky Bunch. Yeah, he is the Funky Bunch. Yeah, he is the leader of the Funky Bunch. God damn it, Jess. Can you tell? When I think Funky Bunchy Bunch.

When I think funky, I think shy guy. Just have a look at our Instagram stories from our photo shoot yesterday. Quick is the 24-hour time's about to expire. Yeah. No one brings funk. Oh, yeah, like shy guy. Like the guy. Oh, yeah.

It's funky. It's funky. It's going to be in his tombstone. All funk, baby. All funk, no junk. Oh, yeah. Yep. I don't love that.

See if it rhymes, it rhymes. We're out of here tomorrow Thursday. which means proud or pov. Proud or pov. I love that. Another great addition of that. Fantastic. More Alfax chances, more chances at the call of fame to spend it reflections.

But, you know, go forth and enjoy the heat. Absolutely. You and your funky bunches. You and your funky bunch. Whoever your funky bunch is. Look around today and go, you're in my funky bunch. You're in the crew. You're not in my funky bunch.

And who's the lead character of the funky bunch? Yeah, who's bringing the funk. Who's bringing the funk? Who's just the bunch? Babs. Oh, bunchy babes out there. Bloody bleeding bunchy babes. Oh, bloody bleeding bunchy babbs.

With bunyips. Oh, my dad's a contagious. Stop robbing me with my dad, you sicko. Well, she's just saying nothing. Say something about it. I have nothing to say. Yeah, we'll see you tomorrow. Bye.

I'm a mother and it is my child. Jess and ducco. That was the Jess and ducco podcast. The Boo Bucket's Happy Meal is bad. This Halloween at Mackers.