Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | She went straight back to that Thai physio

Episode Date: June 26, 2025

We talk old people smell, nicknames that stuck and why did Morgan bring home a stay dog?Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Try the cafe's new blend today. Smoother, bolder, better. I love it. Jess and Ducco. This is the Jess and Ducco podcast. Hey, welcome to the podcast, podcasters. Oh my God, I always love a Thursday. Yeah.

Do you ever, Ducco, sorry, something just caught my eye. Do you ever happen to look at the time at the same time a lot? Oh, like 11 11 when everyone sees that. 9 11. I've just looked and it's 9 11. Jeez. And obviously that's a just looked and it's 911. Jeez. And obviously that's a very significant series of numbers. Yeah.

I feel like I see that almost every day, whether it's AM or PM. Is there anything like that? Or do you catch 1111 a lot? I mean 1111 I used to but I feel like... Do you make a wish every time? Yeah, no. Obviously, big wish guy.

I feel like, yeah, huge. I just closed my eyes for a minute there. When you're thinking about a number that you always say, you end up always seeing that thing that you're thinking about. Do you reckon it's a self-fulfilling prophecy? A little bit, a little bit. But you know, I can't think of another one off the top of my head that I always see.

And it would only happen in the moment that you're conscious of it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you have a favourite number? Feels like a very primary school question to ask, but do we carry those on into adulthood? I like seven. Seven feels good. Nine.

Feels lucky. I like seven, nine and ten. I like 210. Oh, 210. I just liked 210. Oh yeah. I just liked it being the countdown. Yeah, I like nine was my jersey number when I played rugby,

and then ten was my other one, but I like ten, I just like the seven and the ten, and then seven I just enjoy. Do you pick those? Is that like junior footy? It depends what position you're in so I played half Of course and see isn't that showing my childhood Jersey knowledge is AFL. Yeah my brother You can pick any number any number. Yeah, they don't denote anything like a lacking rug You could be 210 AFL couldn't you? You absolutely could yeah, right? We've got I don't know if you can be a 3 to be honest

It might be too wide across the back. And we all know traditionally AFL players lean. Very lean. Like my brother, tall and lean, number two. Oh, he's number two? It always has been number two. Since under eights, he's been number two. I think if I played AFL, I'd look at seven or nine, I think. Yeah, absolutely.

You'd be an 11, don't you, Shagah? Five, I like number five. Is anyone a 69 in AFL? Don't know. I wonder what the high, like I know there's like a 47. I don't know what the highest. Sweet, you can get to a 50. 11 don't you Shaggy? Five, I like number five. Is anyone a 69 in AFL? Don't know. I wonder what the high, I know there's like a 47. I don't know what the highest jersey number.

Yeah. Do you have a favourite number Babs? Yeah, 13. It's tattooed on me. Is it? Yeah. She's just flipping the narrative on the unlucky 13. Well, yes, I think that's why I like it.

Cause I like it to meant to be unlucky. Cause you're a bit sick in the head. And you're big Swiftie. Didn't she flip the narrative on 13? Yeah, she's a, but I was also born on the 13th of May too. Me too, so was the duck man. Yeah, a couple of 13ths. Yeah, bit fun.

Yeah, there you go. It's like Flo was born on the fourth of the fourth 25. And I'm like, ah. Fourth of the fourth. Yeah, I'm like. No, she wasn't the fourth, sorry, sorry, 14th of the fourth, 25. Like, no, we're close. 14 of the fourth, that feels nice. But imagine 24, 14 for 24.

I'm like, God, that would have been good. I like that a lot. It's like people try and do their wedding dates. They don't care about seasons. It's like, oh, we just want like the 10th of October, 2010. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 10, 10, 10. Yeah. Now that we, 10. Yeah.

Now that we're in 2025 and moving beyond 26, you can't really do anything like that because there's no month that can correlate. I guess you could have the 26th of the second or the 26th of the sixth. If you, if you could go back to any year that you've already lived out, what year would you choose? What year would you pick? I think I took high school way too seriously. Like I just was, I thought it was setting me up for the world. My parents are very academic focused. I'd almost like to sit them down and go, guys, too much pressure. I think I'd like to take the pressure off a bit. Or maybe those like uni days. Uni days

are great. I was thinking that either 09, year 12, cause it was so fun with all your mates. I enjoyed school. Ah, so yeah, I didn't because I just had, I felt like the boot was on my neck the whole time. And then you look back and you go, what was I doing? It doesn't matter. Or like, yeah, 2011, 2012,

when you're kind of like in that early 20, 19, 20 period. I was gonna say, yeah, 21, 22. You're going out all the time. You're still a kid. Yeah, going out on a midweek. You've got your license and you can vote, but you're a kid. Yeah, it doesn't matter. And no one expects anything of you.

And you never think you're gonna be older? Absolutely, you're working casual. Mate, remember the days of full-time study and working casual? And you had all the time. I still remember some of my best mates at nine o'clock on a Saturday, "'Should we hit the clubs?'

Yes, we fucking should. And we're all getting ready in our suburban houses. Drinking a bottle of vodka for pre-drinks. I'm getting my dad to drive me to her, like it was just free and easy. Oh, good times. Sisterhood of the traveling pants and stuff. So true. What about you?

That year at 1920? Yep. Saga? Does it have to be a time that I have already lived? Can I go earlier? No, wait a second. Do you want to go into a whole different era? You've got to have lived it, because it's taking you back to a...

Yeah, Katia, what do you want to go to the Jurassic era? What about you, Babs, grade three? No, actually, mine would probably be when I'm like 17, 18. Because I feel like I was such a loser and I just didn't do anything. And I would go back and do stuff now. Because you say when you were 18, your friends would go out, you'd be home reading books? Yeah, I was just didn't do anything. And I would go back and do stuff now. Because you say when you were 18 your friends would go out and you'd be at home reading books? Yeah, I was just so such a homebody and I just didn't put myself out there enough. I had like a massive falling out with some girls

going into year 11 and 12 and it just disrupted my whole high school. And that's fundamental for those experiences. Yeah, and I just was always like, okay, I'll just stay at home. Like I'm safe here, you know, read a book, have a bath, you know. But even now I still do it. I'm just like, oh, I'll just stay at home, like I'm safe here, you know? Read a book, have a bath, you know? But even now I still do it. I'm just like, oh, I'll just stay at home. You know, it's rather than that. So do you have a new friendship group now? Well, it's kind of stuffed me,

cause then I left school, went to uni and it was COVID. So I didn't get to meet all the friends that you meet through uni. Like I met a couple, but they all moved away. And then like a few of my friends have all moved everywhere. So it's kind of like very, I don't have like a very core friendship group here. Interesting. I've just got like a few friends like here and there and then like close friends,

but not like a group of friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's interesting. That is interesting because that is such a pivotal time. You're living in 12. Performing groups. Yeah, yeah. And then going out when you're 18, 19. Yeah, kind of just mucked it up because like, yeah, we had a falling out and then...

Yeah, that's annoying. What was the falling out? Oh, it was just so silly. Of course it was. They just started like... It's always trivial. I had a boyfriend at the time and like we obviously would be doing stuff on weekends or whatever and then the girls would bar up and just stop inviting me to stuff and I was

like, well, that didn't mean I didn't want to hang out with you. And then it kind of just blew up and I was like, Oh, you're actually being really mean and they're like, Oh, fuck you. Whatever. Did they think you were choosing him over them? Um, not necessarily. I think because they were both single, they just were a bit, not like jealous, but like got a bit weird about it and we're like, well, at least we've got each

other, blah, blah, blah. And then they just started doing things without me and putting it all over social media and I was like, Oh, excuse me. It always goes that way with partners in high school though. Like Pacific guys, but oh, you just so whipped you with them. All right. And then I, what that's actually probably a good one. I, I was a, I was a boyfriend, like boyfriend to boyfriend.

I remember my dad sitting me down going, why do you keep getting into relationships? Like live your life. Don't be tethered. And I reckon he was saying, because I was so, I didn't know what I stood for, I didn't know what I liked, I think he was saying, you conform too much to these dudes in your life, you don't even know what you're about. And obviously at 16, 17, you go, dad, leave me alone,

shut up, he was absolutely correct. So that's interesting. Which in the long run, I'm like, why did I even like, that was so silly. When did you break up with that guy? Um, when I, yeah, when I was going into maybe in year 11, in the middle of year 11. Cause like he was just so like, we need to hang out every weekend. Like you need to come to my football games.

And I was like, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. Like, I, this is a lot. I'm only like 17. And see, I got a girlfriend year 12, halfway through year 12. Was she also in year 12? Or was that the older one? She was first year out. She was old. Yeah. And I started dating her and it was exciting because she was in uni and I'd go to her house and sneak out and sleep over and go to school the next day. And like, yeah, and I dated her for two and a half, three years.

That's a long time. I know. So I was year 12. So like 17, 18, 19. And then all the boys are just going out and making mistakes and whatever. And I was like, God damn, I really just feel like- Get your finger on the dance floor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I still had grade 11, don't worry. Don't even remember that.

But isn't that interesting? Yeah, I reckon that's probably the big thing. And now that we've got kids, Ducco, it feels weird to be like, I'm not letting her have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, whoever, live your life, find out who you are, independent of a relationship in those really 40s years.

But saying that, I've been with Morgan since she was younger, since she was at school too. We found each other pretty young too. When it's the right person though, isn't it? You kind of go... It's a catch-22. You actually can blossom with the right person. Yeah, yeah. But...

A lot of people don't. Nine times out of ten, it's the wrong person and can impact so many things. Wow. But instead, I think for our friendship groups, I opened her world up to my mates, their partners, and then her friends, and then my friends started dating her friends. And then we came to this like bigger group. They were like breaking up and shit. But then there was like so many connections within the group. Yes. Are you the only one standing from that time or are there anyone else? I think we are.

Stood the test of time. Morgan has seen that many iterations of my mates girlfriends. Some of them two or three dates. She's been the constant. Yeah, double dates, dinners, drinks, nights out, whatever. Can Morgan and yourself, can you pick the keepers? Now that a lot of your friends aren't getting married, were you able to go?

There was some that had broken up, definitely majority. There was one or two that had broken up, we went, oh, I thought that one would have lasted. But some of them you're like, oh, this isn't gonna work, watch this end. And then it ends and it always ends poorly for us, cause like we're in the middle and then you lose connection on both sides. And when you're bringing someone new into the group, but you actually become mates

with them, you go, well, last one in, first one out. Yeah. But also now we've lost you. Now we've lost you. Ah, it's a fickle time. Isn't it, Jarnst? Anyway. Oh, wow.

Well, good to know. Thank you for sharing that. A bit of a therapy session. Yeah. Yeah. It's good to get to know a bit more about the person that is bad. I'm gonna lose a lot, I swear. No, you're not.

No, but that's the thing. Like, you're such a well-rounded person. It's just, you know, COVID really stuffed it for us. Yeah, that's interesting. Yeah, for my age. That was that pivotal time where you could have made. And yeah, cause then the times when I wanted to like go out, cause I met people,

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the couple all over Zoom and everything. Yeah. You couldn't cause it was, everything was locked down. So, yeah. And then when, when it was time to go out again, was it... Scary. Yeah.

Yeah. It was weird to go out and everyone was getting sick and then it was like, who's got it? Check in with our phone. Who are you doing your picnic with, you know? Yeah. And then it was like going with three friends and yeah, I felt like we moved to Newcastle at 2020 and Morgan Eye. It was so hard initially cause it was like when people could go out with their like core

group again, it was four or five people, everyone was going with people they'd known for years and you than I, it was so hard initially because it was like when people could go out with their like core group again, or four or five people, everyone was going with people they'd known for years and you're like, fuck. Yeah, I have that experience now that I've moved in here. Yeah, right. So that people have their friendship groups already. It's clicky too. And particularly where we live very clicky.

Because they all went to school together, played sports together, were going out together. Sort of infiltrate. Yeah, it's very clicky. Which has been hard, but yeah. Which just puts the boot in even further that she doesn't want to hang out with us. I know. Or reply to our texts.

I'm here if you need. Outside. Does that make us real losers? I think it does. Yeah. If you guys haven't noticed, I don't like to do anything. I'm just... Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, we're getting that. Why don't you go over? Cause Morgan, did you end up buying her? What did she get? Did she want that Kindle stand? Yeah, she did. Yeah. Yeah. Why don't you go sit on the couch, did you end up buying her? What did she get? Did she want that Kindle stand? Yeah, she did. Yeah. Why don't you go sit on the couch quietly with Morgan.

And you guys can just lie in coffin position. Yeah, don't actually talk. Yeah, don't talk. Have a read party. Yeah, we do that in my house, actually. Well, Morgan, go over there. You and Morgan probably get along very well. I reckon.

Not get to know each other at all. Just real base level talk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, welcome to Thursday team. Good morning. Back end of June. Pleasure to be here. The deep back end of June. Deep back end. This is where Shia Goh does his best work. Absolutely. Because birthday week. Of course. Birthday week. Back deep into June. Back in the deep end. He's celebrating birthdays. He's blowing out candles.

Oh yeah. When you get together with your friends who are not Jess and Ducco. Candles are so annoying aren't they? Where did that origin start? I know, and white candles. Where you blow and spit all over the cake you're going to share with your loved ones. The ones who get most excited about the candles are kids right? And they're going to literally right and they're gonna literally spit

because they're not gonna be able to generate enough oxygen to blow them all out. Totally. When they're turning six that's a tough carry. But equal parts they love it but also can't handle when it's not their birthday and it's not their turn. Yeah. So all those videos of the kid trying to run at the cake, throw themselves at the cake, screaming because it's their little brother's time to shine. Yeah the cake blowing out is a weird tradition. But how will he make his wish? Came from the 1700s in Germany. It's always German, they're making Hoo-Brews and candle blowing traditions.

One per every year for good luck. Yep. Well you turning 30, that's a lot of candles to put on. That's a big cake. Do you like 30, that's a lot of candles to put on. That's a big cake. That's a big cake. That's a big cake. Do you like cake? Are you a cake guy? Cakes fine... on occasion. Do you like a birthday or a wedding or whatever?

Cheesecakes great, yeah. Okay. Who likes a cheesecake? Confirmed Babs. Very good. Hahaha. We took intel from someone, turns out we can trust them. Okay good.

Okay good. Okay good, they're checked out. What's the point in surprising him? There's no point. There isn't. Hahaha. We're this close to, we're holding on to one little nugget. Oh, yeah Okay, yeah We got one more day to get through Birthday, I know birthday is Saturday. Yeah, it is celebrating with everyone, but Jess and Ducco and produce a hot sausage

Yeah, we don't know hot sausage might be there True. She is good at keeping secrets. She's the other Luke that he referred to. You're not trying to get secrets out of her. You can't unlock anything. You can't. You can't. Anyway, morning to you babes, how are you today?

No choking? I'm good, no. I ate my dinner really slowly last night. Good, good, good. I was thinking about you last night, I was eating my pasta. Oh, did you have pasta? Yeah. Okay, you didn't have any rosemary twigs in there?

No. Good, you're not silly. Learn from others' mistakes. I got my pasta from the markets that you love to go to. They gave me some... Talk to me, the fresh pasta or the ravioli? Fresh pasta. Beautiful.

Chilli and... it was like a red, it was like an orange. Like infused into the dough. It was delicious. That delicious that sounds phenomenal that was a bit of prawn oh how to prawn pasta um what garlic and the chili yeah I you know don't eat seafood but it's very good for young people but I don't know how to prepare how did you do your prawns frozen from Woolies yeah my freezer and don't know how he's grilling yeah they look funky frozen, what, chuck them on a Weber or a pan? Yeah, pan. Yeah, yeah, and then you grill them. And then chuck that in the pan. With like the, you know, with your garlic and your chili and your and your oil. And your tomato and your oil and your butter. We had a bit of butter in there as well. That sounds lovely.

It was nice. Yeah, it was good actually. I'll give that a go for Luchia. It's really easy. I don't want to impose my dietary restrictions on her. One, I think people love seafood. And two, very good for you. Yeah, and Angus doesn't really love seafood either, does he? He used to be, before he met me, a bit of a fit guy. He's having salmon three times a week. We've not done that for eight years.

Salmon in a bag, question mark? Salmon in a bag with I think some steamed broccolini. I was like, ew, I can't think of anything worse. Let's go. We'll have pasta six nights away, thank you. And lunch. And lunch. But for the young lady, I think it's important.

Yeah, she needs to- Omega 3, omega 6. Yeah, yeah, yeah, she needs to get some seafood in. Next time you make some, can you put some aside? Yeah, okay. Or come swing by, get her a bowl. We might've had too much chilli for her. Good note, great note. Don't wanna-

They do say to expose the young ones to a variety of spice and flavours, so it's about time she learned. This is chilli, sweetheart. A funny stage, just seeing what you like, just chucking things at the wall and seeing what sticks. Absolutely, 100%. Right now, my child only likes breast milk. Well, you know, she's got a very, very narrow palate. Yeah, yeah.

And that's her prerogative. She wants bitties. What, Mummy? But I haven't confirmed this, but they do say what your mum was correct in what the woman is ingesting can sort of alter the breast milk. Not hugely. It's not like she can eat a bunch of chocolate and the milk's coming out of chocolate. But I wonder if Flo is getting... Getting some stuff. Ooh, busy.

Mummy and Daddy made prawn pasta tonight. Ooh, delicious. Yummy, yummy, yummy. She slept pretty well last night, so the prawns might have helped. You never know. There you go, replicate that. If that's what worked, replicate it every single night. Good good. Hey big show though for a Thursday team. Absolutely. You got wordy-okey on the show today. Bit of fun, producer hot sausage coming in with some words. We also have that call of fame, two tickets to game three Designer in Origin.

Sydney. Did you see, so there's still some tickets available for that game, but the cheapest ticket- I can't believe it's not sold out. Well the cheapest ticket you can get now is $348 I think I read. Probably an individual as well, you know, just those solo they're trying to fill. Yeah. Wow.

So these are hot property. And we'll chuck in accommodation. Absolutely. Somewhere to rest your head. What else have we got? We've got Alpha Bucks. I did say yesterday, god, people have been sucking. Rude. We had a woman get eight yesterday. Yeah. She was. She was good yesterday. She was great. She was very very good. But an anomaly. We've not had someone that good in a

while. But up next, we got some, we've, Shagai, every now and then just send some toilet stats. I know. Just some stats. Guys, we haven't been to the bathroom for a while. Let's go collectively as a team. Do we all own Squatty Potty's now? I don't. Oh, someone's birthday is coming up. There you go. I can't believe that wasn't on our list. Babs, there you go. He doesn't.

Cheesecake? Yes. Squatty Potty. No. Will execute. Also yes. Anyway, we're going to the toilet. There's been interesting studies done about what people are doing on the toilet. Fantastic. I had Indian last night.

Jess and Ducco. Jess and Ducco. Jumping on the toilet. Sitting on the toilet. Sitting on the toilet. Sitting on the toilet. Sitting on the toilet. There's been a whopping 500 people surveyed for this study, but you know, we can't, that's

still a big sample size. That is a great sample size. Again, the Australian Catholic University only interviewing 300 short kings for that short king study. Unacceptable. They couldn't find the rest of the short kings. They only got 300. This is 500 normal human beings, okay?

Normal statured, possibly some short, possibly some tall. Counts for a full vote. It counts for a full vote. It counts for a full vote from a bathroom suppliers company. Surveyed, how much time basically people spent on the toilet on their phones? Oh no, these are always so devastating. They're pretty bad. So 49 hours using their phone on toilets, which is over two full days a year down the drain. In an average lifetime.

Yeah, correct. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Two whole days accumulatively. Yep. Sitting and scrolling, sitting and texting. Do you think about how many times you go to the toilet? Yeah. Now, obviously ladies sit down more frequently.

Yep. If you're a lady and you're doing a one, do you scroll or that's so quick you're in and out? No, I will still scroll. Oh, okay. And this is something I'm trying to work on, Ducco, because everything I read, they pop up on the feed. The urinary tract experts, the gastroenterologists, they're all like, the longer you are sitting on the toot, the more pressure you are putting on the downstairs, you're stretching, you're widening, you're ripping things. Do your business and get out. But I, so I try and leave my phone outside now. God, I feel weird.

Sitting there with nothing. Yeah, see we only get it out if we're doing a two, but even then now. See isn't that funny? I've walked in on my husband, Standen, Johnson in one hand, phone in the other, Ducko. So I thought all men were scrolling while they whizz. To be fair actually, we have urinals here at work and I do that. I do the urinal. I'll whip it out and hold it and just, like, it just becomes complete habit where you can

just like, well, you don't even need to hold it. Yeah. Just stay out. Just stay out. Yeah. I need to find it. I go searching. That's why you need two hands.

I need my phone torch. Hence why I... Oh, like a mid-60s lady. I'm picturing my mom in the dim restaurant. You need the light for the menu. Exactly right. You need your light. And then the GM comes in and he goes, I can't find it again.

I go, same issue as boss. I'm like, I'm going to go and get it. I'm like, I'm going to go and get it. I'm like, I'm going to go and get it. I'm like, I'm going to go and get it. I'm like, I'm going to go and get it. I'm like, I'm picturing my mum in the dim restaurant, you need the light for the menu. Exactly right. You need your light. And then the GM comes in and he goes, I can't find it again. I go, same issues boss.

Anyway. I've got my light on. Here you go. Here you go, Mike. Let me get that for your brother. Let's do a shot. You know how Babs and Chargo get toast together? Chargo and me go, I'm the Chargo.

Can you come help me farm me a snake? No. God forbid you've had a big night. Oh. You are dusty. That thing go sometimes. It's easy to piss yourself You have to get the shy guy in to charm the snake come here little buddy come on and peeps its head out And then you can relieve yourself little groundworm peeps its head out. Do you ever just take your pants off completely? Yeah, absolutely There's nothing when you see a grown man doing that I go, God. Do you ever just take your pants off completely? Yeah, absolutely. Oh, like a little boy. And then around your ankles and you just go, here you go.

There's nothing weird about it. And when you see a grown man doing that, I've seen it before at Ural. Is that because it's now to confirm or deny? At a pub. Because you're walking into full moon. Yep. You're walking in, it's just a bum. Yep, butt cheeks, yep.

Sometimes they take their pants all the way down and they half-leap their undies. Other times it's just, yeah, full butt. I've seen it at pubs. With pants around ankles. Yep. Is it just laziness, do you think? I don't know what that is. Drunk, lazy. That is dropped on the head as a child or something. No, but is that, we've talked about this on this show, is that

who once taught you? Maybe. Cause how were you meant to learn this stuff? You see other guys next to you and be like, oh why is this? Yeah, primary school acceptable, totally. Totally. When you get to that high school, yeah, when you get to that high school period or definitely when I've seen people at pubs do it, I think maybe they're too intoxicated. Yeah, just take it all the way down. But also at the same time, maybe they just need to find it too. But realistically, if my pants are all the way, I'm a man, I'm standing at the urinal trough, my pants are all the way, thank you. What's your name? Johnny. Giovanni. My pants are all the way around my ankles. When you do need to pick them up, what's the technique?

Cause if you're bowing forward, that head in urinal, hitting trot. And arse out. Or you have to like, yeah, ballerina pirouette down up and grab them and put them back up. That's actually quite skillful because now you're locked in because the jean or corduroy if you ducko, nice corduroys, are locking you in. You don't have the mobility. The other thing is well that great that you know we discussed this on the show as well as the great, some guys stand on ideas, some don't, whatever. If you're on that or not on that, your pants are going to, a bit of your pants are going to get on that, particularly oversized pants trend. Absolutely baggy as all hell.

There's always pee on the floor anyway, great on okra. Yeah, there's pee on the floor everywhere. That's actually, I didn't think about that. Yeah. That's disgusting. Cause I know you have to shake, shake, shake, but there's always gonna be some dribble. Whereas these guys are getting it on the exterior as well. Yeah.

Because their pants are touching the floor. I just thought, there'd always be some dribble for them. If they go to bend down and put their thing on, there's gonna be dribble on the leg. Oh my god, because their hose is still out. It'll catch it. Yeah. Oh you're just, are you perpetually damp? You know LBL, light bladder leakage, panty liners are advertised to ladies. I think we need to advertise them for men. Normalise it for the boys. Totally. So you've got some sort of absorbent pad in your jocks. That would be great. I think that would be fantastic.

Let's eliminate one problem. Yeah, yeah, and create another. Ha ha ha. Jess and Ducco. On this very program, we talked about the superior smell. And I said, I am a sucker for that dusty, potpourri, imperial leather smell akin to old ladies. Yeah, you do like the old lady smell. And it's more old ladies than old men.

Cause I think old men douse themselves in those old school fragrances that are just so pungent. At least my pa Borg used to. Big fan of the old spice and those cliche old man perfumes, colognes. But the old lady, it's just, it's potpourri, it's warmth, it's love, it's cooking. It's disgusting. And not many people like it. No, it's old whiskers. It's old whiskers, you're right. And like nothing wrong with that. They bring you in for a

squeeze and you feel the scratchiness. Yeah, the scratchiness. You love that. They've stopped shaving their face and I I think that's what I love the idea of most getting to that age where you don't care about the societal pressure that's been put on women for decades and generations. Yeah. You let it all go. Yeah. And that's your prerogative. But the scent has been described as old people smell. Musty, greasy and oddly sour. Oddly sour? My potpourri is not oddly sour. My Nana Borg was never oddly sour.

I can't imagine sugar mama was oddly sour. I don't think she was sour. I haven't smelled the old lady for a while. You're not getting in nice and close to old ladies. I don't know, because I don't live in the same state as my current grandma who's alive and I've only got one left. That's right. We've got one grandparent left, Meryl. But I don't- And she's met the baby hasn't she? You went to her though. Yeah, so we went to her. Yeah. I'm next. I want to give her a big woof when I go back

and smell. Please do. I want you to give her a nice cuddle. Nuzzle into the area between her neck and shoulder and take a deep breath in. I reckon you'll like it. It's like a stale smell. Yeah. Oh, I like it. Anyway, Oxford Healthspan founder, her name is Lesley Kenny. She wants to help old people stop smelling like this.

Yeah. If you want, I guess. She needs you to eat mushrooms four times a week. She's done all this study that mushrooms have some sort of property in them, a substance that is going to block the skin's natural process of degrading. Because that's what she's saying the smell is. It's not... It's decaying skin.

It's not anything to do with imperial leather. Is she becoming a zombie? Or their grooming habits. It's genuinely that they're rusting. Oh, wow. So the bodies, obviously the processes slow down as we age. Skin and cell turnover isn't as rapid, isn't as fast. The oils that we're producing are essentially rusting on the skin the older we get.

I mean it makes sense and you've lived your life right? Absolutely and yes, Merrell, Nanoborg,. Yeah. But you're not washing off those oils. You can't get rid of that. Those rusty smelling oils. No Old Spice is getting rid of that. No Old Spice. I can't think, my Nana was not a Rexona user, but whatever the old lady, maybe Mitcham,

whatever the old lady deodorant, it's not working on rusty oils. So mushrooms help stop degrading the skin? If you eat, if you actually consume mushrooms, it'll slow that process down. Right. Mushrooms not exactly having a moment in the sun, in the media at the moment. So she is saying... How's that for the PR of mushrooms? I know. Imagine if you were a mushroom PR person you're like wait what? I wonder if they tried to put this article out now being like no mushrooms are great. I have some mushrooms guys.

Champignon, the French mushroom available at Woolworths. Of course. But shiitake and oyster she is saying. Oh shiitake mushrooms. Shiitake mushroom ranked highest in antioxidant content. There you go. I don't reckon I have mushrooms four times a week. No neither do I. I'm so hit and miss with mushrooms. Me too. Like sauteed in a tub of butter and thyme. Yeah. I think I could take it but otherwise. Yeah it's just it can be like the funky sort of taste totally and the texture Yeah, the texture that sliminess sometimes If I get mushrooms for breakfast, sometimes they're good if you get those big ones like a big portobello I can't do that. Oh

I don't mind that because you've grilled that it's like a piece of meat It really is you I know you like your plant burgers from grilled and stuffed you ever've grilled that. It's like a piece of meat. It really is. I know you like your plant burgers from grilled and stuff. Do you ever get the one where it's just a big portobello mushroom? No, no. I don't think I could ever eat that. You like the fake meat? It would make me feel sick. Vegan, vegetarian. The fake meat which probably has so many other issues. Probably. Very high. You take what you can get. You know what I mean? But if the old person in your life is starting to smell a little rusty or oddly sour, get him some shiitake mushrooms. Just feed him up with mushrooms. Load him up!

Is that why your old lady stopped getting you to help her because you were just trying to give her so many mushrooms? Well no, I was trying to take the mushrooms out of her trolley because I wanted her to keep the smell. She's like I want mushrooms for my dinner. I said no, Peggy. I like your scent. And she truly got rid of you because you kept smelling it. She reported me to the volunteer agency and got fired. 30 seconds stands... Oh, froggy boy. One of those mornings. I'll answer 10 questions all starting with the same letter.

Have to take your first answer. Cannot use the same answer twice. If you're unsure of the question, just say pass. We'll come back if there is time. We're playing for $10,000. Our player today is Hannah. Good morning Hannah. Good morning guys.

Hannah, Hannah, what is motivating you today? You called, you got through, produce a hot sausage because you want to spend the money on... Overseas trip, visit my Nana. She's in England. Oh, there you go. Bit of Nana. Bit of Nana. Now Hannah, when was the last time you caught up with Nan? It would have been two or three years ago now. Okay, so not too long ago. Last time you gave her a cuddle, did she have that old lady smell? Can't say I noticed.

Okay, well now that three years have gone... See, Nana, you don't go and smell old ladies like Jess does. Well she wants to. She wants to get back over there to give her a big ol' whiff. She didn't say no to that just then. Test it out. Yeah, okay, go test it. Take her some mushrooms, because if the smell is too pungent, she needs to eat four serves of mushroom in a week. The letter you're going to work with today, Hannah, is D. D for danger. Danger. I love it. Hannah, you ready to rock? Yep, I ready. Okay, your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter D, we need you to name a country. Denmark. A dog breed. Dashound. A shoe brand.

Docs. An adjective. Delightful. A sport. Dancing. A clothing item. Denim shorts. Something that flies.

Dumb. A three-letter word. Day. A singer. Demi Lovato. A reality TV show. Days of our lives. Oh, sis, that's not reality. I know.

No! That was it, right? That was it. That was it for 10. That is scripted to Beyond Belief, Hannah. Oh my goodness. Oh, wow. If you had said Dance Mums, you would have said Dance Mums.

Dance Mums. Dance Mums. Dance Mums. Dance Mums. Dance Mums. Dance Mums. Dance Mums. Dance Mums. Dance M wow. If you would said Dance Mums, oh my god you would have been able to go see Nan. Hannah you were elite Queen. You were absolutely

elite. We have no notes. Yeah. Wow Demi Lovato. Baby, you don't go away empty handed. I'm so sorry it isn't a trip to see Nan, but you do get to spend $100 online with our mates at Vera Flu. You can get custom prints, you get some beautiful art for your home. Maybe even buy something to send over to Nan in England. Perfect. Thank you guys. Thank you Hannah.

You were exceptional. Up next, Adam Elliott, our sports correspondent in studio to have a bit of a sports rap, what's going on in the NRL world and beyond. Yeah, geez that was close. God, she was fantastic. Red hot. Jess and Ducco.

Boom, boom, boom, everybody say Adam. Elliott. Good morning, young Adam. You know what, it's funny, we were just talking about old lady smells. Yeah, do you old lady smells because Jess does. She's alone in that camp. No. Oh don't tell me you like an old lady sniff. It's nostalgic. Thank you. Wow. Do you know what? As soon as you said old lady smell I think I'm like ugly carpet, ugly carpet, ugly curtains. Yes, doorleys everywhere. The smell makes me feel loved.

From your grandma? Yeah. Yes. My nana borg, imperial leather, soap, potpourri, dandruff maybe, whatever it was. Whiskers. Whiskers. What did we just describe? We did an article, apparently old lady smell is literally the skin decaying.

It's the skin getting rusty. The oils coming out of the skin, the turnover of the cells. That might be enough to sway my vote. So I was going to say a man notorious for smelling wonderful. I wonder how he feels about one of the controversial smells and he's all for it. You love the old ladies smell. What's your, because we did this last week on the show, I think it was last Friday, favourite smell. Because like Babs and I both like a butcher smell. I like wood chips. You know what I mean? Do you have a favourite smell? I reckon like for me something that's really

relevant particularly at the moment with the one arm sitch putting a slow cook on in the morning coming back from training hungry lamb shoulder literally going through the house every room in town. Because it feels like you've earned it. Yeah, it does. Yeah. And I'm like useless as. So the fact that I've thought about it, to do it, I'm like patting myself on the back. Yes, it's to get multiple boxes. It smells nice.

You won't be in a sling when your child comes, will you? No, no, I actually get out in two weeks. Oh great. Okay, good, good, good. Which is so good, but I don't know what I'm gonna do. It's been nice having Jess pop my headphones on for me. Jess is your minder. I just come in with my arm tucked in my hoodie and stuff.

Well it's funny actually, that's a great point, Ducco, because obviously just had a baby. Ducco, very hands on in the birth, Adam, taught us all about hands on hands. I was down south and caught floating. That's incredible. Literally he's like, your child mate, you go for it. He was the demeanor to his obstetrician being Patrick Swayze, that scene in Ghost, coming around just in case he needed it. Yeah, he needed me there.

He was right there. Did a part of you think, I'm not qualified for this? 100%. And I was scared. I was like, they're slippery. They're slippery as all hell. And that's when you realize, and they say it, people that, you know, at the hospital and midwives, they do tell you like, don't worry, they're not as fragile as you think.

Exactly. They're just cartilage. And that's when you realize, I reckon, at the birth, you're like, they're not as fragile as you think. Exactly. They're just cartilage. And that's when you realize, like at birth, you're like, oh, it's a tough little thing. Yeah, that's right. It comes out, it was an alien coming out. And also, funny one for me, I don't know if you've seen Down South,

but they come out face down. Like they come out facing- Haven't seen it, no. Facing butt. So I was like, why is it backwards? Thinking, yeah. I wouldn't have picked that. Yeah, apparently spine to spine,

like baby spine to female spine, or mother's spine is no good So either side on or yeah, did you know that do you know what I don't remember Angus was down south I don't know if he caught Luton. I'm pretty sure he was there to catch. There's a photo I can zoom in but I don't remember that. Yeah, it's weird. I reckon she came out face up But maybe that was not idea. It's an old one I didn't know that. We need to be sling free for that. You're in the slips mate. I'll be there ready to go. And you're not finding out the gender, correct? We're not. No, I was actually speaking to a good friend of mine. His missus is 28 weeks pregnant, so a week behind Millinois.

And he's having a little boy, he's a boxer. And he's with an American girl whose dad coaches in the colleges and we're just talking about yeah like you know what sport and all that sort of stuff yeah yeah and I said well I didn't to be honest I don't even know what gender so yeah there's a lot of exactly a lot to look forward to because it'll be I love the idea of Adams down there and then you're the one that lifts and go it's us! Oh yeah you'll see it first! I actually spoke to my mate who did the same thing from from Tarthory back where I'm from of Adams down there and then you're the one that lifts and go, it's us! Oh yeah, you're serious. Well I actually spoke to my mate who did the same thing from from Tarthru back where I'm from.

He's recently just had a little girl, Charlie bless her. And he said he was that excited and he's a tough unit my mate. He's a builder, he's been dropped out at 14 to become a builder. He's just an old tradie now but like was that emotional at the birth that he just didn't check? Yeah he just went down. And he's 10 minutes in Gourmboyne and he's like oh I'm about to text someone and say I just had a baby and I can't say what it is. And isn't that the most perfect, it doesn't matter they come out healthy, screaming, red

covered and all that and you are just elated. There's so much going on in that home. You don't get me excited we're still hopefully 10 weeks off. Yeah yeah yeah. Well speaking of excitement, Knight's going on in that home. I love it. You guys get me excited. We still hopefully 10 weeks off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, speaking of excitement, Knights 2 on the trot. Yeah, so good.

The boys going where they won in Perth. How are they feeling? Yeah, really good. Like, especially the win against the Dolphins because everyone was, the Dolphins was on everyone's tongue at that point. They'd won, I think the score was 158 to 18 was their last three games. So yeah, you know, they were on a red hot streak. We come off the back of that really close game against the Roosters that and I think we probably

should have won. We got really unlucky there but yeah good to see a few of the younger boys playing really well but Jesus good to see Bradman and KP back together. Salt and pepper. Linkin' up. Yeah, yeah. Gin and juice. It is salt and pepper, isn't it? Kind of one without the other. It's meant to be. They have to be on the table? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gin and juice, yeah, yeah.

How's this, so Fletcher's sharp. Ruptured his spleen? Yeah, so lacerated kidney. Kidney, kidney, my apologies. Lacerated kidney, and I think he might have a bleed in his spleen. Sorry, is that from the roughest tackle known to man? How do you rupture?

I know, it's one of those things, you know, like, and it wasn't, you know, Fletcher's been hit harder than that before. Wow. The sport we play there's just so many different moving parts and bodies and and organs yeah and organs in there. So he's still over there isn't he? He came off with a head knock originally. People that are listening would have seen it his arms got trapped by his side which is a dangerous position to be in because there's only one way for your head to go and we're all just concerned about his head knock No, I obviously wasn't in Perth But I've spoken the boys they said he was groggy after the game and you know not feeling real well

And they they woke up the next morning and found out that he'd been Rushed to hospital because it was a bit more serious, and he he'd had the surgery so I've reached out spoke to Fletch He said he's feeling alright. He's just kicking back in the hospital. I think for him the biggest part is just not knowing really. It's not, it's an unprecedented injury. Totally, yeah. There's no rehab for that. It's a car crash injury. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

On one hand, you hope that it's not actually that serious and it's, you know, been looked after early, so he'll be alright. But on the other hand, you've got to take a bit of caution when it comes to that. Internal organs. Absolutely. Yeah, that's horrible. Not to diminish your arm, but an arm's one thing.

An internal organ. Yeah, a bicep's one thing. Yeah, at least you know. I did nearly arm, but an arm's one thing. An internal organ. Yeah, biceps one thing. I did nearly tear up looking in the mirror this morning when I was getting dressed. It's looking like a bottle of dropped yoghurt. The old bicep process at the moment. Hey, we'll get you back, mate. We'll get it.

A bottle of dropped yoghurt. All right, quickly, got one for us about seagulls and footy matches. This was unreal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Watch the video. Well, unreal, but oh, I've got a story about this. Yeah, could be on a little bit rogue here. Okay goals though. Yeah First of all the seagull was it this was an AFL match the actual story

I'm gonna go into the story first and then I bought run the gauntlet and say how I go I'm not really had back on the radio. It's a shy guy launches at you across the desk. You'll get you off My bad will dump it So in a game of AFL though, someone's lined up, they've taken a mark lined up to take, it was quite a long run up too I thought, which builds the suspense. Anyone that wants to Google it and look at the video, but after about a 15 metre run up, hits, come off the boot, sweet, big left foot, and about five metres after he's hit it, it's just smacked a seagull.

Knocked it clean out of the sky. The caption of the video just smacked a seagull knocked it clean out of the sky the caption of the video does say KO to seagull. Nice. I would like to probably... The seagull went off a HIA. The seagull went off. As the player from the opposition picked the seagull up to remove it from the field there was nothing supporting its head and neck. It was just walking. Oh, because are you saying KO would assume you then can get up?

Yeah, KO is very easy. Understood. Oh, valet. Oh no. I've done it at golf with a duck, but with a golf ball. My brother's done it at golf to a kangaroo. And it copped it sweet, got knocked, hopped up, hopped sideways for a bit, like proper like a human would be after a HIA, and then straightened up after a while and off it went. I thought you were going to say squared up to him because kangaroos are the one animal I would not want to get on the forest side. Not when he gets on his back tail and starts shaking up.

No, absolutely not. He pulls out his own golf swing and just... The late great Graham Elliott, wild man, absolute legend from where we're from, high school teacher so known really, really well, but probably other than that, known for how much he loves nature. And could tell you about every single bird, right? You go for a walk with him, here's it, bang.

That's a bird. He knows it. Indigenous man, so loves trees, loves native trees, everything. So one day we're down at the Tarthra Fish and Ship shop. There's about three shops in Tarthra. Yeah, yeah, right. This is a place that doesn't have a set of traffic lights.

It's a one street through it right? Yeah. I reckon we're maybe 11 or 12 and we'd seen the older kids at in-school holidays throw some hot chips out on the road as a car comes past. Seagulls chase the hot chips. Oh, to lure. To lure. Well, man, I didn't do it because I'm a bit of a nature,

nature egg. Well, you got off with something like that. But I'm tagging on, you know, and you learn these things as you get older. Could have been probably a chance there for me to speak up. So I don't think this is right. But it's, anyway, it's happened. The car was in front of my dad who used to always go check

the surf in the morning. He's on his way to check the surf, seen this car hit a seagull. He's pulled over, walked over to the table we were at in front of it, looked at us, the seagull was um not in a good way, he's taken his shirt off, looked at our table said shame on you, picked the seagull up, put it out, it's misery and walked it over to the bush. I've never been so embarrassed in my life, you can imagine 11, I'm there with a group of young girls. Yeah, yeah, yeah school Yeah, so your dad's getting the same fight the same fight the seagull got in the game of AFL. Yeah

What a lesson you'll never forget Never forget you can't look a seagull in the eyes Might be the cousin of the seagull that my dad had to Related Well on that note. Thanks for coming in, mate. Always a pleasure. She's never. Jess and Ducco.

Yeah, I'm mad. Oh, you're mad? Well, you've had a go at me as an extension of my husband, because I like to say we. Oh, yeah. When I talk. You do do that. We love. And I also think I do it to you and I, don't I? Yeah, you do it, yeah.

This whole team, I feel like. But to be fair, have you ever disagreed with the- Yes. A few times. Give me a specific example. Whenever I said, we like it and you're thinking, no, I don't. It's hard, I can't like, you know. Yeah, well then it didn't happen.

You always agree, you're just trying to back out yourself. Next time it happens, I'll bring it up then. I truly am using it when I'll bring it up then. I truly am using it when I think it's appropriate. It's when you get very excited and you go like oh we love that. But the first time I said we was Angus had literally whispered to me at a group dinner I'm getting tired so I announced to the group we're getting. And he then threw me under the bus going, Oh, we're getting tired up. That's different story. That's not fair.

That's, that's, you know, I say, you know, we love puttanesca. That's his best dish. Yeah. Yes. That's a wee. Anyway, it's like, we love Jamie Jury. Well, no, you love Jamie. I never said we.

Yeah. Good friend of the show. I may have called him a good friend of the show. Feel free to chime in at any stage here, if you can think of an example. If you can, I'll take it when you have genuinely felt the show. Babs and Shaggy, feel free to chime in at any stage here if you can think of an example. If you can, I'll take it. When you have genuinely felt the wee. They're not going to say anything. No, no, no.

I can't recall a specific time. If you have felt misrepresented by a wee, I'd love to hear it. It's usually, look, they're harmless enough that you just let them go to the keeper. No, I want to know. Because I... Well, be on the radar. Be on the radar. Do you have one, Babs?

No, I'm scared. You're not scared, you just don't have an example. Anyway. Anyway, sorry, yes. I have an example for you, Ducko. Angus has done it worse. I don't know if he's tried to return serve, but I have now taken offense and he's like, no, it's not the same as the we thing, Cause he, I think he knew why I'd got my backup. We had that fancy lunch the other day and there was a group of us, the table

of 10, we're all mates, we all know each other. Wine is flowing. Table service, Duckett. Waiter comes around, starts, did she start with me? I think she did start with me. And I said, I'm going to have a white wine, please. You know, I've entered my reasoning area. I'll have a white wine.

And she sort of makes her way around the table and there were a lot of calls for red. Angus decided to use the phrase with the waiter completely unnecessarily. I'm going to stay with everyone and get a red as well. I had just ordered white. Do I not count in the everyone? He goes, no, it's not the same as you using the royal way. I went, that's worse because you kicked me out of the way everyone else got read by you exactly I got white yeah but he and he heard that he was sitting right next to

me I said he decided to banner it as I'm gonna stick with everyone and I'll get red do you reckon he wanted white? Or do you reckon he actually wanted red? Well, whether he wanted red or white is a moot point. He kicked me out of the collective. He should have said, I'm going to stick with the majority here and get red. That would have been fine. But saying sticking with everyone eliminates me from any sort of we or collective. I'd imagine it also makes you feel more isolated because it's almost like he's us and them. You're absolutely right because then they go, oh, well, should we just get two bottles?

It's like, well, now I'm paying for just a glass of wine on my own. Everyone looks at you and goes, do you really want a wine? I know, now you're being weird with the bill. And you go, we love wine. Everyone goes, no, we want red. He's the one who introduced me to white, ducko. Oh, that's on him.

It is on him. Jess and Ducko. Commissioners United. What are you the commissioner of, and I mean what are you running, what are you the head of that you never thought you would be? A group, a little Facebook page, whatever it may be. You're an admin. You're an admin.

You're the overlord. You're the, yes. We have an overlord for the book club. Yep. Maybe you're the book club overlord. See, that's perfect. That's what I'm after. It's when you look at yourself and go, am I a big fat loser?

How did I end up here? When we're eating Indian last night and she pulls up the agenda. Oh, at a book club and agenda on a Wednesday night? We need to be kept on task. Totally. We do need to. And she does it. She does it well. And she does it proudly. I'll be putting that on my Tinder bio if I was her.

It's on her LinkedIn. Yeah. OK, good. She endorsed from Microsoft as well. So everyone knows, I spoke about the other day. It's big news LinkedIn. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Good. She endorsed from Microsoft as well. She is. So, everyone knows, I spoke about it the other day. It's big news, half the press. I'm a commissioner of my NFL fantasy. I started a fantasy. Be more specific. Yeah.

Of your third. Your third. It's my third. This is my first time commissioning, but it's my third. I've pulled together some friends and some friends of friends. I have multiple questions. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. First question. Yeah. Did you have to put a campaign together or were you the only one who said you wanted to do it? No one really wants to do it. And I wanted to do it to start a new one again so I didn't adopt someone else's team because I'd been invited into other ones where people had left. So you get dregs and you're like well the only way I can get clean is if I commish. If I shard myself, I'm commish baby. I can hit resets. Yeah. Yeah. I'm already getting

private DMs from people asking questions that are annoying and yeah. Now are you going to be a fair and generous leader or you open to bribes? Or to corruption? Absolutely open to corruption. Because if anyone could be corrupt and I think it's the duck man. Or I'm so open to a bribe. A well-placed compliment, a four pack of Forex on his doorstep. You'll give me a first round trade for that guy. Absolutely. I mean, you know, just little things like that. for that guy? Absolutely. I mean, you know, just little things like that. Corruptible. And what do you actually do as Commissioner of a Fantasy Football League? It's like organising an event. You're the guy who's just got to put the details out there all the time, make sure everyone's there. So we have a draft, we've all got to be on

our phones at the same time on the same night. We have two minutes to pick a player. So you've got to facilitate the draft, make sure everyone's there. So you're doing the outlook invites? Exactly right. I don't know how to use outlooks so Shy Guy I'll get your help on that. You can't print so perhaps I'll be doing your printing. In fact I'll need all of you hands on deck when we have this NFL draft okay? I need my full team. Is that why you bought a new laptop? Yes it is, because my phone's like quick enough and what if I get draft one? What if I get the first pick? Commissioner can't be rolling with inferior tax.

Absolutely. And obviously end of financial year. Well done. I'm sure you picked up a bargain. And the other thing is they'll have a draft order. So one to 10, right? Do you pick that? Yes, but we do it.

It's a randomised order. I'm going to get like AI or someone to do it. Or maybe Shagoy. Right. Same thing. I'm actually going to get you to help me with that Shagoy. I will chat you about that off air. What if I get the first one though? It looks rigged.

Oh, it absolutely looks rigged. So I can't, I don't know if that's, I don't know if I can do that. I think any leader of a governing body has to remove themselves, don't they? I can't go 10th though. I want to win. The issue, oh, that's the thing. You've got that competitive nature. I'm saying. But you're also in charge of the rules and regulations. And there's money on the line.

Like we're all playing for money. Like, yeah, yeah. I'm like, I don't think the commissioner should play. No, the commissioner plays. No, but you're right. You're opening yourself up to too much scrutiny. That's why I'm going to have to show everyone how it was randomized on AI. That's why you do need Shy Guy involved.

Yeah, exactly. Technically, he's the commissioner. He's like the ghost commissioner. I like the commissioner. You're the face. Yeah, you're the... But you're the, he's the commissioner. He's like the ghost commissioner. I like the commissioner. You're the face. Yeah, you're the- But you're the one actually pulling the strings. You're Paris Hilton.

Yes. In front of the DJ decks. Yes. You're just doing the show. Oh, I see, I see. You're the actual guy. You're the USB, that's what you are. You're my USB stick.

Popping up underneath, running the thing. Cause you're right, I reckon you're opening yourself up. Are these friends or are these randos in your group? No, half friends, half friends are friends. I worry for the sanctity of the friendship. We'll have to show from the get-go this randomized thing we were going to do. Yes, yes. Cause what's more important to you, Darko, friendship or winning? Winning this. Winning this. So the people I've got in this group, winning this. Absolutely.

I would lose friendships if I won the fantasy and I'd rub it in every year. I'm happy with this to my first and only time as commissioner because I won. Suck it lads. But on this topic, right? Are you a loser? Are you a loser? Are you a commissioner? Are you an admin? I was talking to my head, Ressa Brandon, big listener of the show. Shout out to Brandy. He listens to us every drive, every day. And he has somehow fallen into being the commissioner, the head of his, his Greyhound dog walking club. He's 38 years old.

Oh, I love this. And he, he now is in charge of setting up the walk meets, the local walk meets. They do dress up some days. They all go to parks. He picks themes. He does the Christmas ones. I have been to some Ridgeback meetups, Rhodesian Ridgebacks. I'm not an admin, but the work

that goes into it, because you actually have to scour the dog park, you have to scour location, there might even be a permit involved. You've got to get there early and make sure you set up. You've got to get there early even. Our Ridgeback group was doing things like, all right, no puppies allowed because they're so active, they upset the older dogs. Of course. So this one is no puppies.

So dogs two years and over. And then you've got to police it. If someone rocks up with a puppy, sorry, today's not your day champion. Jog on. Imagine. That's actually a really difficult job. It's a tough job. Imagine waking up one day and going, oh no, I'm the commissioner of my Greyhound walking group. That's another question. How did he fall into it? Did he nominate? So the other people who was friends with had to move away and they're like, hey mate, we're just going to handball this to you for now. The position's vacant. You've shown good stuff.

Yeah, you're in, you're in. You're in, you're the guy. Oh my gosh. You blink and you're the commissioner. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. What are you running? What are you the admin of?

Maybe you had to pick up the baton and run with it because the position was vacant and it's a group that you're like, well, we need a leader. Yeah. You know, I'm the chosen one. Or like Ducker, you're four tooth and nail. I want to be a commissioner. I want to be a commissioner. Because I want to leg up.

It is a job I'm destined to do. Your third NFL fantasy league. That's too many. The duck man is commish. I'm commish of one though. This will be my priority, but I'm still, I'm still going to make my teams good in the other ones. That's not important. The duck man is commish. I'm commish of one though. This will be my priority but I'm still going to make my teams good in the other ones. That's not important. What's important?

I fear for you blurring the lines of leagues one, two and three. In leagues one and two you're just an average Joe. You know, you can't be bringing that commissioner energy to one and two. True, that's good call. And then be looking at the commissioners of your other leagues going I wouldn't have done it that way. I'm like an extra in movies in the other two. I'm the main character of the other ones.

That's very confusing. God, you've got a lot on your plate. Thank you so much. I'm a busy man. I'm a very busy man. Do you have the same hours in the day as me? Because you are Arnold. Just got to squeeze it in.

Arnold Schwarzenegger would be so proud of you. He's like, we all get one life, milk it for all it's worth. I might do a day in the life if you're ready. Oh, I don't know if you could fit it all in to a 90 second reel. My husband texts me, he's like, remember, he's commissioner. I don't think that was the title, but he is part of an elite, a very, very niche Facebook group called Angus's of the world. And you're only allowed entry if your name is Angus.

He went through, I think it was like a six month. He had to be the first Angus to say, good morning Angus's. Because that's the role of like the admin, the commissioner. Good morning Angus's. You greet fellow Angus's of the world. Good morning Angus's. That's funny. So he was leading that charge.

That's something with heavy responsibility to all the other Angus's of your name. Particularly an Australian based Angus, because our time zone, we're like so far ahead or behind depending on where you are, where you're at. The other Angus's. So there was some infighting with the Angus's going, oh, hang on a minute. It's not a new day yet. I'm in America. It is for this Angus.

Yeah. But it's not for that Angus. Oh, that's funny. That's a tough one. Geez, what a tough, how do you get out of that? Commissioner of Angus's of the world. I think someone else just picks up the baton. Yeah, keeps going. All right, my time's done.

Uh, cause we must say good morning to all the gus. Emily on 13 10 60, what are you the commissioner of? So my last name is True and I've started True Sweeps and I make sweeps on anything that you can have a bit of a bet and a laugh on, like when the bachelor, the bachelor was on, everyone got a bachelor, had to throw in a few dollars to see who was the ultimate one at the end. I do first try scorer for the state of origin. I always run the Melbourne Cubs and now someone at work wants to do me a little logo for True Sweeps.

I love this. So, Em, you just went, I'm going to have a bit of fun. I'll do this. But people are actually putting, you're basically a bookie. You are. That's what you're doing. Like you're having to coordinate all this stuff. I just put my bank details on and I say transfer $5 and if you don't transfer, you don't get paid out. Well, you're not in. You go to the next person. That's a lot of admin.

That's so much admin. Emily. Are you getting any money out of this? No, but I won recently on Toto scoring first in the Origin. And did you, did they get angry when you were in? Yeah, see now it's feeling, yeah. Well, I said I'd share him around and let someone else have Toto for the third one. Oh good.

Oh, she's a generous commissioner. Jess and Ducco. and duck oh okay Bob's is in studio it's gonna catch on now with with a dictionary a dictionary she's gone through it tabbed a few pages the Oxford dictionary to get on you good I know she's no Macquarie gal never has been through and through yeah she's gonna throwquarie gal. She is Oxford through and through. She's gonna throw a couple of words at us. We are gonna attempt to sing a song that has that word as a part of lyrics.

Yep. Gusto, that's all we ask. That's all we ask. A little bit of passion, not looking at anyone in particular. She's looking at me, that's the thing. Death Starat, Shy Guy. Getting Gusto from the Shy Lord today.

Well, some stats, Jess won like four or five times before Ducko won last week. Okay. Knocked me off my perch. Yeah, so. When was the last time Shy Guy was on the board? Jeez, it'd be six weeks. Seven weeks.

Easily. Yeah, we can find out. Yeah, a couple of months maybe. We'll do some analytics. Do some analytics later? Sure. Heaps of time? Alright.

First word. Omni's broken. First word is walking. I'm walking away from the troubles in my life. I'm walking a bit of Craig-y D. Yeah, nice. Point to Ducko, he's on the board. Here he comes.

All right, next word is mum. Stacey's mum. Nice, Shy Guy, there he is. There he is. I didn't even take a breath. He did not. Hell yeah! Alright, Ducco and Shy Guy both on the board, Jess?

Not yet. Nowhere to be seen. Okay. Next word is, it. It's just... Oh wait, no, it's it. Damnit. It, it, it.

Oh my god. No, it's... What? It? Shake, shake, shake, shake, shake it. Is that Shake It or Shake It? Shake it, shake, shake, shake, shake it. Is it, is that shake it or shake it? No, it's shake it.

No, it's shake it. Yeah, shake it. That's right. Shake, shake, shake, shake, shake it. I did not know it was shake, otherwise, yeah. Damn. It is shake it. Yeah.

Good bet. Oh my god. Alright, points are shy. He's back. Wow. Alright. He's on the board. Come on.

Here we go. She's out of there. Yes. Not the swings over. Sorry, I always do that. He's back. Wow. All right. He's on the board. Come on. Here we go. She's out of there. Sorry, I always do that. Not the fear of love. I didn't get off the ground last week either.

I can't do that again. That was embarrassing. It's hard. Next word is never. We are never ever ever getting back together. Nice, Ducker. That Taylor Swift concert has put you in such good stead for this game.

Thank you so much. Oh, goodness me. All right, guys. At the moment. Yeah, we'll give for this game. Thank you so much. Goodness me. Alright guys, at the moment it's... Yeah, we're giving a score update. Yeah, so it's two to Shy Guy, two to Dukko, none to Jess. If I don't get this I think I'm out. Yes, indeed. Goodness gracious.

Alright, next word is... Team. Team. We live in cities, don't ever know none of it. We're running certain teams. Team. You know the song I'm trying to do. Yeah, you're trying to sing more, sir.

A team. Is it teams or team? Team. Team. I know A team at Cheren, but I don't know if- I actually know where the team is. I don't think he says team. Yeah.

Snowflakes. He does. And the society takes. I don't know. Maybe I said none. All right. What was A-Team? A-Team is one.

When does he say it? They say she's in the closet. A-Team stuck in her daydream. Damn it. Drats. Damn it. All right. Well, that was Null and Void.

I got a brush up on me lawn. Yeah, you do. Oh, Lord. Next word is story. It's a story on my life. It kicks us whole. We drive all night. Thank God. Wrong story. Story on my life. You kicks us whole. We drive all night. Thank God, wrong direction.

Jess is back in. I hate that song. Sorry. It's always like you hate most. It is the earworms. All right, well technically this is the final word. Unless Jess gets it. Somehow gets it.

You get it, you take it to tiebreaker. Otherwise it's between me and the car. Oh gosh. Oh gosh. Are you ready? This stage couldn't be higher. Next and Ducko. Oh gosh. Are you ready? Stakes couldn't be higher. Next word is? Punk.

I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hand. Shy Guy wins! Yes I do. Finally! Finally! Today was when I went to answer that question from five minutes ago. You know that cliche thing that I think older toddlers are guilty of Ducko? But why?

But why? Oh yeah. Yeah, they always ask why questions. Exactly. Yep. My daughter's only 18. How babies made, but why? But why?

But why do they do that? Why are you doing that? My daughter's only 18 months, not talking very much. So we've not entered that era, but we had some friends come over the other day and they've got a three year old very much in her why era. And I've never dealt with this before. Yeah. And you tell me if I handled it correctly.

You've got some young kids in your life. I know your nieces and nephews probably have gone through this phase as well. I identified my small child needed a nappy change. So I said, excuse me guys, I'm just gonna quickly deal with Lucia in the room. The three year old though went, I wanna go where the other kid's going. So followed us into the room.

I pop Lucia up on the change table and it starts. What are you doing? I said, oh, we're doing a little quick nappy change, sweetheart, why? I said, well, from the smells. She's poo'd herself. It smells like she's poo'd herself. Why? I said well sweetheart we we try to feed her a balanced diet and fiber is a part of that diet. She said why? I said because when you don't have enough fiber in your diet. You're in full detail. You got trapped in the why train.

Because I try I've read too many books and read and listened to too many podcasts. Speak to children like adults. Don't baby talk. You know, maybe some of the concepts are too big, but I'm on that. Well, sweetheart, if you don't have enough fiber, you'll get constipated. And when this sweet angel is constipated, she's a nasty little gremlin. Why? I said, well, no one likes to feel all blocked up, do they? Why? It's legit just sitting there on the change table like, can you guys wrap this up?

Oh, my legs are exposed. Everything's out right now. Bare bum to the wind while I'm trying to explain to Lottie about fibre. Why? I said, well, you know, you feel yucky in the tummy sometimes, you know, if you're not passing things. Why? I said, well, that's just the way the anatomy works.

Why? I'm going, well, this is the other issue, Lottie, is that sometimes the fiber isn't enough, so we're coating, we're lacing her water bottle with something called a laxative. Why? I said, because of the gremlin phase she gets into when she's feeling sick in the tongue, why? And I went, Lil, I need help here. Why not? Shut up!

I'm in a vortex. I'm in a vortex of whys. I'll show you why. And I don't know how to get out of it. But my god, they're resilient. They are, aren't they? These two, three year olds. And you're right, you can go too deep. And you're like, why am I, I'm having a chat with you not even understanding. Because I'm trying to be respectful and not just dismiss her. My mum was a big because I say so and I don't want to be that kind of person.

I want to take the time and explain. But when you've got one wriggling kid who has a pooey bum and another kid who wants to know why, the tether starts to get a bit shorter and shorter. Good on you though for going into detail about fibres diets. Fibre, laxative, osmo lax or whatever the hell the thing we're using is. You're one step away from getting her to smell the nappy. Here, this is why. Smell this. This is why. Yeah, do you want that in the household? Because I don't. Jetson Ducco in the morning. Jetson Ducco's 10k alpha box on hit. Alpha box.

30 seconds to answer 10 questions all starting with the same letter. Have to take your first answer. You cannot use the same answer twice and if you're unsure of the question say pass. We'll come back of course. If there is time we're playing for $10,000. Our player today is Beck. Good morning Beck. Morning.

Beck, Beck, Beck. Beck it's 6.30 this morning. Oh yeah. Hannah got nine. She was so good. She was so good and so close and yet did not walk away with the 10 grand. Bec, are you going to go 10 for 10? I'm hoping so. Come on Bec, how do you normally go when you play along? Sometimes six. Okay, sometimes six. Sometimes six, sometimes none. That's how Bec rolls. Okay, well let's hope today is more than six, but she's made it through this far, that's all we can ask.

What do you want to spend ten grand on? Hopefully get married. Wonderful. Are you engaged? Yeah, we have been for 15 years. Oh, 15 years. That's the longest engagement I've heard of. It's a long runner, and $10,000 will get us a venue. No worries. No worries. Well it's a solid letter for you today, Bec. You're going to work with the letter T.

T for terrific, which is what you're going to need to be. After 15 years, do you just alope? Oh, do you just have a party? Go out for dinner. I don't know what we'll do but yeah, we'll watch something out. Celebrant can just rock up, you do the paperwork. See you later. See you later. I guess we'll find out what you do in 30 seconds. Absolutely. Let's not dilly dally any further. Your time will start after the first question, Bec. You ready? Yep. Starting with the letter T, we need you to name a Disney character. Tour. A country.

Turkey. An ocean animal. Turtle. An insect. Past. Something in the bathroom. Cow. A colour.

Teal. A job. Technical something. Past. A band. The Rolling Stone. A band. A four letter word. A board game. Oh you were in the zone back. You were in the zone until technical something or other came in there and then you did more than four letters for a four letter word. She was out of the gates. You were giving some great answers too. I thought we had a player there and you know what's funny

you ended up with six. Shut up you did. You ended up with six because you passed on an insect which could have been termite or a tick or a tarantula, a job. I'm a vet nurse so I can't know anything. It's always the ones you know most. A job, well that could have been a teacher, a truck driver, a tour guide or a technical assistant. I would have even accepted that. A four letter word, tail team, you've just gone over by then. But look, you're a good player. You don't go away with a 10k or the wedding. But you do get $100 to spend online at Vera Fleur, okay? No worries, thank you.

Thank you, Beth. We'll eventually get married. Let us know when you do, we'll be there. Absolutely. We'll roll in. You can be DMC, thank you. Thank you, Beth. We'll eventually get married. Let us know when you do, we'll be there. Absolutely. Yeah, we'll roll in. You can be DMC, ducko. You know he's good at it. Yeah, why not?

You know he's good at it. Why not? And Jess can be a celebrant. Oh, absolutely. Oh, without the 10 grand, ducko, I don't know if she can afford me. I'm joking. You get the Alphabox discount. I'll do it for free though, because I'm just that kind of guy. I'll pay you, ducko. I enjoy joking. You get the Alphabox discount. Yeah. I'll do it for free though,

because I'm just that kind of guy. I'll pay you, Ducko. I enjoy it. Anyway, thanks, Bec. Godspeed. No, thank you. That's a rice cooker through and through. That's how we love Bec.

That's a rice cooker through and through. Jess and Ducko. What's the nickname you've still got? We're talking about something that was bestowed on you a long, long time ago. Yeah. Maybe from a parent. We landed on this yesterday with Pruduce's hot sausage.

Yeah, he just texted and said, hot sausage. Babs' dad texted in and just said, that was him greeting his daughter. In greeting his eldest born daughter, one of three, we realised Damo calls her hot sausage from way back. And so we'd thought we'd call her produced hot sausage. Now that's not actually what he calls her, but we just thought it was funny. We thought it was so funny and it is, it just brought up, brought to mind the nicknames you get bestowed, whether it's from a parent.

Daddy. No one calls me that. Do you have, do you have, do you have mummy as well? Whether it's from a... I don't have mummy....Aura. Daddy. No one calls me that. Do you have, do you have, do you have mummy as well? Whether it's from a... Oh, I don't have mummy. ...or a... Daddy. Mummy.

Or maybe it's a primary school nickname that you just couldn't shake. Cause that's the best thing about nicknames isn't it, Ducco? Yeah. You don't pick them. No, so my primary school name is Ducco. That's how I got it. Mine's FartMinistrone. Only one person calls me that.

But she's my best mate. She's still in my life. We celebrated our 30 year friendship anniversary the other day. And she still signs off all my birthday cards, Christmas cards, text messages. I think I'm in her phone. FartMinistrone. And FartCioni. FartCioni. I love that one. Yeah, even how's my Apple CarPlay doing me an absolute dirty when I text you the other day, auto-correcting farch, which I had said to you in text, to fart. I went, CarPlay, please get it together. Sort yourself out. Sort yourself out. I always have the family nicknames, the dad nicknames.

When does it get weird when the mum or dad call you a little hot sausage or a little princess? Yep. My dad used to call my little sister, I don't know where it came from, don't know how it originated, Madame Pops? That sounds fart't know how it originated, Madam Pops. That sounds farty as well. Yeah, Madam Pops. Was she good at that?

Windy Bot. Yeah, Windy Bot. Oh, she was gassy, still is. And he calls her Madam Pops. He doesn't anymore, but I remember there was a period- But as if that's not coming out at her wedding, Dad always does a speech. There was a period where I was like, you can't say that anymore Dad, that feels weird for her, but it's hilarious.

Madam Pops. But it's always the parental nickname, like produce a hot sausage. I told you off air yesterday, let's bring the rice cookers in in case they didn't hear the podcast. A girl I went to primary school with, her dad would call her tiger. And I'm pretty sure he had like a Canadian accent or something. So there was just something. Tager-y. E tiger.

E tiger. And I remember going to her house being like, oh, my dad doesn't call me any big cat related nickname, but that was the thing. And well into Adam. Your dad's like, g'day hippo. One time I did sit on my dad's lap and he went, oh, I've never forgotten that. The chair just broke. Fat shaming me. Now Angus falls me long go. I cannot shake it. You can't win. I get Lord Farquaad.

You're calling that out yourself in bed. I walk up to him. How dare you. Can you grow your hair out so we can get you the bowl haircut? Please. I sure may as well. Please. Some of you may die. It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.

Sorry Jess, that's just far too niche. Yes sir, yes. 13 10 60. What is the nickname you're still rolling with? You still give it to people, you still get it. If there's parents to kids. It's stuck. It's stuck. Maybe it's a little weird. Maybe you want your dad to stop calling you that. Shy Guy is a nickname that is weird. We actually two years ago when we all formed a team, we tried to start something new. I didn't want to call you Shy Guy because I don't love the name. But we were told-

You could be Duck. You could be Shepitartus B, you could be Shep Daddy. The Slim Reaper. The Slim Reaper. Unfortunately we were told no, the reputation precedes the man and we cannot shake it. Apparently that was news to me as well. And now you're the Shy Lord. The Shy Lord.

It evolves. It does evolve. But 131060, nicknames, what are they, who gave it to you, do you still have it? Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. Nicknames, are you still being called something that you got from when you were a kid? Maybe it's from your parents, maybe it's from friends. Like I got Ducko in grade four and it's stuck with all my

friends and you know pretty much everyone in my life except for my parents. Call me that. My biggest issue is that back in that day they did not put the K when they wrote because your wife when she texts me, it spells it D-U-C-O which I appreciate there isn't a K in your name, but for the sake of just phonetics, Chuck Akay in there. I'm always like, who is Juco that Morgan is speaking of? When I came on radio, they made me Chuck Akay in so when it was on billboards and stuff, people wouldn't go Juco, which makes sense.

Yes, and Juco. That does roll off the tongue. Juco is a type of paint. So it's like, you know, we didn't really want that. Think of all the ambassadorships you could have been open to. Yeah, yeah. That does roll off the tongue. Due goes to the top of paint. So it's like, you know, we didn't really want that. Think of all the ambassadorships you could have been open to. Duralux, whatever it is. Now you're just bloody, the bird guy.

I'm just the quack man. Anyway, we're talking nicknames and Babs produces a hot sausage now. That's right. She's actually, her name's Billy, but she got Babs from us. Yeah, we gave her a bit of an acronym, Badass Billy. Babs. And that has caught fire until Dame Otexter, her dad yesterday, saying, hey, hot sausage.

Well, there's roots in that. We're running with it. Hot sausage, do you get a bit of a... People calling you Babs now in your life? Yeah, some people do. Do you like it? Yeah. Yeah, that's fine.

In the past 24 hours though, have they started calling you hot sausage? Hot sausage, yeah. Out of cars and stuff? No, no. No, they haven't. I hope they don't. It'll catch. It'll catch fire. We'll make sure of it. Josie, good morning. Good morning. Have you been stuck with a nickname for a long while? Oh yeah, ever since I was born, my nickname is Cupcake. Cupcake. Out of the womb, cupcake. That's such a cute one when your parents want to look at my little cupcake. But then when you get to, you know, a bit older. Yeah, like are you still being called cupcake? Yeah, and I'm 27. 27. Aww, but your daddy's little cupcake.

I know, that's very sweet. It's like nicknames, you know, when the baby's still in uterus. Yeah. And you might go, oh, little worm or little peach or little someone. Someone I follow is calling them little gremlin. I'm like, that's nice. But that nickname sometimes sticks, you know? Hello, little one.

Ah, Reese is calling through. Good morning, Reese. Born and aware. Reese. Reese. Fantastic. What's the nickname you've been stuck with? I would have moved out from Sydney and promised you'll meet a couple of blokes.

We've become good mates and because my name is Reese, they used to call me Riss-O. And then I don't know why, and then his sister walked upstairs and said what he's calling him ring-hole I said ring-hole and ever since then my nickname's been ring-hole Oh the adaption One of the great mishearings Riss-hole ring-hole

Ring-hole So the boys call you so do they call you like ringy for sure or is it just straight up ring-hole? Ah it's just ring-hole Ring-hole let's get ring-hole Oh I love that. I'm at the pub, who with Jack O'Johnno, Billy, ring hole? Yep, all the boys are in. Yeah, all the boys are here.

I love it, Reece. Love it, ring hole. Call back anytime. Save his name as ring hole, Bounce. Ring hole, please. Will know. Nikki, good morning. Good morning. From Cupcake to ring hole, what is the nickname you can't shake?

Nicky Moo Cow. Oh, that's not fantastic, is it? Nicky Moo Cow or Nicky New Cow? Moo, I thought Moo. Nicky Moo Cow. Oh, bro. Every lady wants to be referred to as a cow, don't they Nicky? Oh my god, that name from like five years old, I'm now 52. Oh no.

Nicky Moo Cow. And so all your friends who have heard your parents call you and they'd call you like Nicky Moo Cow. Oh my god, yes. They love bringing it up whenever there's a family event, something, they will bring it up. I love it. Nicky Moo Cow.

And a 21st as well. It doesn't even roll off the tongue. It does, it's a lot of it. Yeah, yeah. Nicky Moo Cow. Nicky Moo Cow. And a 21st as well. It doesn't even roll off the tongue. It doesn't. It's a lot of it. Yeah. My little Moo Cow. My little Moo Cow. Give us a Moo.

And Bron, good morning. Hi, how you going? Excellent, babe. What is the nickname that you've been stuck with? Stinkpot. Oh Bronny, no. What happened? Well, you know, years ago, your brothers, I had two older brothers and they'd pin me down

and pretend to spit on me. And I got on top of them and let one rip. Oh, you're giving them farts in the face, Brawn, as paper. Yeah, stink-o. Yeah. I love it, they're spitting on you, which is gross, but no, when you fart on us,

your stink-pot. I love it. Your stink-pot. Stink-pot. So now your whole family calls you stink pot? Yep. And I'm in my 50s now and they still do it. I love it. The Christmas card. Dear stink pot, many happy returns.

Jess and Ducco. I hope you've looked in the mirror today and gone, I am hot. I am looking good. I am sexy ass. Yeah. And what else we got here? My 27 year old son gets his nickname Turtle on the text line. I love that. Turtle's not a great one. He got it at six months old. Yeah they stick don't they? They do really stick. For better or for worse.

They stick. Amber text through saying my cousin gave me Ambyur. That's funny. You don't really want to be associated with a scent that is sprayed in work toilets do you? Yeah yeah but Jesper she had the last name Cheezeman for love of cheese from Hayley Cheezeman! Oh my god! Stop it! Hayley Cheezeman is a real person? Hayley Cheezeman that is the greatest name. That's one of the greatest names I've ever seen! Surely she got cheesy. It ain't easy being cheesy. Oh my god, because then it opens up. Like you could be called tasty.

You could be called caminthair. Yeast. What's yeast got to do with it? Oh cheesy, yeasty, artworks. You're thinking of lactose. Yeah obviously, I'm mixing it up. Mmm milk solids. And then Christopher said, hey guys, any chance of my daughter Ruby Crow a special 8th birthday

shout out? Oh happy birthday Ruby Crow. Crowey. Crowey. When your surname's Crow, do you have a birthday? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. And then Chris just said, Hey guys, any chance of my daughter, Ruby Crow, a special eighth birthday shout out. Oh, happy birthday, Ruby Crow. Crowey. Crowey. When your surname's Crow, do you get a nickname or are you just Crow? Crowey, I guess. Oh, Crowey, yeah.

Oh, well, what's a, is it a group of Crows? Is that a murder? It is a murder. Hello, plural noun. I've been reading bird books to my daughter, obviously. I've been seeing all sorts of bird facts. A murder of Crow. Miss Murder. Miss Murder. She's ace. She doesn't want that nickname. Jess and Ducko. I love it. We're still getting some text messages about nicknames that have stuck

Ducko really quickly. Alayna has said my cousin's nickname is Sponge. Even at 30 years of age, she still wets herself when she laughs too much. That's funny. Lucky she's a sponge. Lucky she's a sponge because she absorbs it. Exactly, she needs a panty liner. I had one of the great moments yesterday, team, at home. My wife has an obsession, like I'm going to call it an obsession, with thinking dogs are missing and being like, oh my god, that dog on the street doesn't have its owner, we'd better help it and take it in. And usually the owner is like five minutes behind or the owner's around or it's like at the front of its house. Yes, yes. It's chained up in the front yard. Oh no, that dog's loose. We've got to rescue it. We've got to take it away from this world.

Yes. It needs our help. It needs our help. And I love dogs. We're big animal people, big dog people. We've got Pam, obviously. Pam is on antidepressants. Pam is on tablets to stop her from licking. Pam's just got a baby in the house. So, you know, she's going for a lot. Pam gets a three course meal, handmade by one or both of you. Organic diet. She sleeps in the bed. Pam gets jealous that she can't breastfeed. You know what I mean? Like she sees Flo breastfeed and she gets jealous. She mainly gets jealous when I bottle feed the baby Flo. You wake up in the middle of the night and she's just licking your nips. Yeah, yeah, just trying. Let me get some of this spout. But it's mine, not my wife. What are you? She's dumb, she's a dog. Obviously, doesn't get it.

She needs to work it out. It's Morgan who has the hormones. So when I bottle feed Flo, Pam gets a bit jealous. I'm at home bottle feeding Flo yesterday. Morgan was out and she had a physio appointment, right? On her way home from the physio appointment. How's her pelvic floor? It's a lot stronger. I'm glad to hear it. But she hasn't been doing her exercises as frequently. So she needs to keep going.

You've got to do that. I don't keep going, but it's a lot stronger. Good. I can't confirm. I just meant because the physio said it. No, cause I- Oh, absolutely. They do the before and after.

It's important. Yeah, what do they actually do in there? Oh, okay. I don't know. We'll do it in the ads. They check. Yeah, after. It's important. Yeah, what do they actually do in there? Oh, okay. I don't know. They check. Yeah, right. Anyway, I thought you came back happier from the... She doesn't need you. She's got the physio. I'm still in here in the desert. What's going on over there? Can I go to this physio? I'm satisfied. Thank you so much.

Is this that Thai physio place? Yeah, buy nine, get the 10th free. With the flashing light on the front. I know the one. You could have taken my membership card anyway. You were in the next room. Is that my wife? Just getting a shiatsu. Helping floor exam, are you?

And hold, hold. Just getting a shiatsu. That'll be floor exam, are you? That's what we're calling it. And hold, hold. I reckon 50% of the ladies out there are currently doing a kegel. Oh, that's a good reminder. Quickly squeeze it in. Squeeze it in. Anyway, she'd come home from that and she'd seen a dog on the way home. And she's obviously like, oh my god. And to be fair to her, this dog was actually not near its house. And it was a little dog. It had a collar on named Honey.

Hang on a minute, she picked it up. Of course she did. So she's pulled over. She pulls over. Because that's a skill in of itself. I've once tried to collect a dog I thought was on the loose and it took off. It was scared of me. I couldn't catch her. Yeah well she knew Morgan was in a good mood. She was drawn to her. I want to go home with that lady. What's happening in that household? So she's lured the dog into her car. I hope Morgan's video does not listen. Oh yeah, she knows that you married. Please, Morgan knows what's up.

Come on. It'll be Morgan's friends that listen now and then tell her. Did you hear on the radio and say that I had a weird tie pelvic floor exhalation? Anyway, yeah, she's picked up this dog, right? She got it. And sorry, what sort of dog? It was like a little brown, I don't know, like a little yappy yap dog.

It wasn't, you know, and its name was Honey. Shout out to Honey's owner, cause they exist, and Honey was a fair way from home. Oh, okay, so number on the collar? Yeah, no, no number, but it had a name. So then Morgan comes home and goes, it calls me, I'm bottle feeding Flo, Pam's next to me like, you know, like, you know.

Trying to get your attention. Exactly, Morgan's like, hey, can you come outside? I'm like, not really, I'm bottle feeding Flo, Pam's next to me like, you know, trying to get your attention. Exactly. Morgan's like, Hey, can you come outside? I'm like, not really. I've got a bit on what's up? She goes, I brought a dog home. Was your first thought? Oh my god, she's bought a dog? What did you know? No, I knew this is not the first time this has happened before. And I was like, what do you mean you got a dog? Well, Morgan, this dog was probably fun. She's like, no, it was looking so lost and lonely. And it came right to me. Just come out and don't bring bring Pam. I'm like so I take the bottle out of Flo's mouth. Flo is instantly crying She just wants more bitty. Yeah, absolutely. I'm not done daddy

Yeah, I'm not so I have to pick her up then Pam's getting all you know worried cuz Flo's crying I open the door Pam bolts out and then all of a sudden cuz mommy's home cuz mommy's home Also, we got this little yappy dog in the yard and Pam in the yard and then I've got the baby Sorry, Morgan forgot how anxious the dog currently is And forgot that we have a child that Pam is now protective of like and Morgan's like oh no little yappy dog in the yard and Pam in the yard and then over the baby. Sorry, Morgan forgot how anxious the dog currently is. And forgot that we have a child that Pam is now protective of. Like, and Morgan's like, oh no. Like, see you later honey.

You're not getting, you're not making it up. Honey's become dinner to Pam. Luckily Pam's good with dogs smaller than her. Oh, cause she can dominate. Exactly. And it's just Pam was fine, but then honey sniffed Pam's lady, lady cave. Oh yes. And Pam did not like that.

And then got a shackle up, doesn't like that. No, because you meant to smell the boot. Isn't that how they greet each other dogs? I guess so. Yeah, yeah. She got the wrong end. I think the wrong hole. So then I'm having to get Pam off who's crying. I'm like, Morgan, can you just, she's like, what should we do? We're going to have to keep the dog here.

I'm like, we're not keeping this dog in this house right now There's no identifiable way to contact honey's owners. You gotta take her away to the microchip That's what I said, take her to the vet, get her chipped. That should have been your first point of call, not coming home and disrupting the whole household Bringing another puppy. Was she hoping you'd fall in love with honey once you lay on it? Let's keep honey I think so. Honey's ours now. I'm hoping Pam, because she was little, Pam would along with her and all that sort of stuff. Yeah yeah you know there's not enough on your plate. Yeah why not. Let's take another dog. Normally I have the dumb ideas yet she's rolling in with this. She takes it to the vet the vet chips him and honey was like kilometers from home. Oh wow. Yeah yeah yeah. Honey at hitchhike. Honey at hitchhike but then Morgan's like that night she's like

I wonder how honey is. So is that what happens you leave it with the vet. Leave the vet and they call the owner. The owner picked up. Well, what about a reward for Morgan? I said that. Thank you. Cause Morgan left her number. I said, did the owners contact you? Like to check in?

She said, no, they never contacted. And then she went straight back to that time. Just about done though. Wonderful program today everyone. If you missed a minute of it, our podcast does live on the listener app or wherever you get your podcasts. As always, exclusive bit of content. Didn't we get juicy yesterday? Didn't it just? Babs not revealing anything about herself even though we tried.

We did though. Oops. I'm waiting for a DM from her mum. Being like, stop asking her questions she doesn't want to answer. Great confronting questions yesterday. My issue is she could always return to you know. I just don't think she cares. She's nodding out there. Truer words have never been spoken on this show. Old Babsie can't care. Now yesterday Duc, if we can bring the rice cookers in on something, yesterday actually, speaking of Babs, we were speaking about her generation, the Gen Z gays. It's apparently a phenomenon that boomers are really upset about, particularly posting

a lot on X, formerly known as Twitter, saying, what's happened to good old fashioned customer service? I don't even get a hi, how are you? Hi, how can I help you? I'm walking up to the counter and I'm making the first interaction. Yep. They're upset. Yep. You experienced this in the wild I went yesterday. I was at a shop yesterday trying to buy some pants a cool trendy show Yeah, a trendy shop but a shop that I normally would go to and wear their stuff this girl the camera didn't say hi I didn't say anything. We find the pants. We're looking for sizes

She could see us looking no one else is in the store doesn't say anything I go and try them on even the change room element didn't get her talking to you I'm walking out in front of her and Morgan Morgan's like yeah, I like them we're talking about things Maybe take them up there. Whatever she says nothing Not a peep. Then I go up to her and go and she goes just those ones I was like yeah. That was your first words. That was it and I nearly didn't buy them So I was like I oh yesterday I came in here and said I didn't really experience this before. I experienced it yesterday. Isn't it funny because we talked about it. Now I

was an advocate. That is extreme. Yeah it was. But the alternative of when they follow you around, because obviously that's their training and they've been told, upsell, don't let them leave, ask open-ended questions, no yes or no's. I find that really irritating. Yeah yeah yeah. But to not even engage with someone who's gone to a change room. I know. Why? I couldn't believe it. I also get funny about going into a change room without permission.

I don't know if it's the child of me, but I always have to say like, can I try this on? But I hate asking for permission. Actually, you know, while we're on change rooms, why do all change rooms now have massive curtains and some of them are double curtains so you can't cross them over so there's always like a little gap. Your butt's always out. Your butt's always out. 100%

And even the big curtains are out of the singular and they never fully just close. I'm like what happened to the doors? It's not on a rail. Yeah. It's just sort of like you'd have in front of a window. Yeah like swings. So it's not hitting the edges. It's so annoying.

It might be aesthetically pleasing. I think it's an aesthetic. It's a boho little thing. And cheaper. It is a boho. It will be cheaper. You're right because it's not a might be aesthetically pleasing because it's an aesthetic. It's a bow and cheaper Yeah, yeah, right because it's not a door or a key Less likely to steal or do something in there that you should yes say the one I was I had double I had two doors two flaps on both sides. I was double flapping in both sides Oh my god, and you still couldn't get a high. How are you? So I left the boat, but I still couldn't get anything

Yeah Change rooms are a place that make me a bit anxious like in stores like trying things on and coming out I just don't I just buy them. Yeah, I go home if it doesn't work. I'll bring it back. I say no returning something. Yeah My biggest issue is people who design change rooms who have never ever been in a change room before Why are the three hooks available so close together? Yeah in a change room before, why are the three hooks available so close together? So if I'm taking maybe five or six garments in, I can't actually hang them all up.

Exactly. Because the coat hangers are just fighting. And do you leave things in the change room when you're done or do you give them back to them? Or do you put them back? So I always assess on entry where is the dump point. Oh, I didn't know that. Because a lot of particularly female stores, there's usually a rack Discreetly somewhere where it looks like that's the dump point and I like to clock it because I feel rude leaving them in there I just chuck them on the floor and walk out. No I'm joking.

My issue is re-hanging stuff nicely. I'm a bit haphazard. I can't do it. I can't do it. But you know one of my best mates is in the fashion world You should see her refolding clothes to put back herself. goes have some respect I went I can't do that I'm taking I'm taking a task I'm what you probably wants to kill time yeah I watched enough Marie Kondo I still can't do it you know who'd be a good folder Shiloh would shot I'm pretty good yeah you'd be a good folder a crisp folder you know there's that template I see some retail workers use it it's almost like a stencil of sauce and you can put it square, you put a t-shirt in it's like you fold, fold, fold, fold and it does

the work for you. You could probably do it without the stencil. I learned how to fold a shirt when I worked at Cotton On. Yeah. Of course. I would love to see inside his wardrobe. It'd be pristine. It'll be meticulous. All folded. I could send you some photos later. Yeah, with pleasure. Take a selfie of your wardrobe. No, no, invite us over for gods sake. Yeah. You don't go through my wardrobe. You haven't told us about this date that you've found.

Yeah, I talked about it with Babs yesterday. I don't think the date will work. Oh, why not? Because you're not here. Oh, he's here in New Zealand and I'm in Italy. He's picked a date in New York. No, that was accidental. Babs can attest to that.

Yeah, of course. Oh, also there should just be Babs going over to his house. Which was always the plan anyway. Yeah, who would ever invite him? Why don't we do our last show before we go on our next break, which isn't like, I don't know, three weeks or something. We'll do it from your house. I love that.

Sure. I want a homemade pizza, man. An OB pizza. Yeah, I want a pizza. I want a pizza. I want a pizza. I want a pizza. I want a pizza. anyway. Why don't we do our last show before we go on our next break which isn't like I don't know three weeks or something. We'll do it from your house. I love that. Sure. I want a homemade pizza man. An OB from the Shire Lord's house. That'd be fun. Get that bowl of pistachios ready. I'm more involved, what do you reckon, 10 rice cookers? No rice cookers. No. That's 10 foreign bums on your toilet. Yeah yeah yeah. and a necessity if they come is they've all got to use the toilet.

Absolutely. So we're getting him a Scotty Potty. He revealed he's the only one on the team who doesn't have one. We got you one for your birthday. It's fantastic. A hot sausage one for hers. Have you been using yours? Yeah, and so do my housemates.

How's the bowel movement? Yeah, how you feeling? Yeah, pretty good. Excellent. You haven't been complaining as much though. Oh, and your housemates poo-pooed. Yeah, they did. The poo-pooer.

But they like it? Yeah, well I mean it's still in there and no one's complaining about it. Excellent to hear. Yeah, good news. Alright. It's on the list. We'll workshop that and then we'll hear more about this alleged date that we were going to be invited around.

And then double parcels to Shy Guy's house. That's right. Dumps on Shy Guy. No. Don't make that a thing. I'll workshop that title. Thanks. Nah, I think it's fine. We're out of here tomorrow. Big show, Friday show. We've got Friday bangers, we've got Alpha Box, we are drawing the state of origin tickets tomorrow. Oh my god, the pool is dense. It's good. People are cooking. Yeah, it's fantastic. Because they know that prize is unbelievable.

Join us tomorrow from 6. We'll see you then. Bye bye. Bye. What is going on, ringhole?