Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Stick your finger in there its funny!

Episode Date: August 27, 2025

Will Taylor Swift & Travis Kelce let Jess & Ducko be part of their wedding? We ask what did you spend too much on and can Ducko work out the one thing all of Jess' conversations have in common?Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Take a trip to McDonald's today and try the new McDonald's meal with one of six collectible souvenirs. This is the Jess and Ducco podcast. Hi everyone, happy podcasting. I'm proud of all of us. We persevered. Yep.

We were able to do some non-Taylor and Travis Gier. It's a big day, you know, and you're also between doing all their content and then not that much. How much should you do? How much is too much? Because it's one of those things. I wish her well, but I'm not a Swifty.

No. Do you know what I mean? But God, you get sucked into the universe. What's the last celebrity engagement I cared about? I can't even tell you. But this one? You care. I care.

Yeah. Why is that? Yeah, it's funny. She's got gravitational pull. Because I woke up to your tech saying they're engaged. And I must admit, I did have, I turned the shower on. I just had a smile and had a, good honor. You should have seen me do my, whatever this is at the gym.

I was pulling something. Yeah. And I just was like. Back rows? Were you back row? It was like on the pulley cable? Yeah, yeah. And I was pulling it with one.

Yep. Seated row, seated cable row. But I was standing. Oh. Should I've been sitting? Well, it depends on your pot. Oh, yeah. You know what's funny?

So I was just Googling free, Instagramming. Yeah. Body weight workout gym just to look for some ideas. Yeah. The chick was kneeling, but I couldn't work out how to drop the cable down at the gym. So I had to stand. She was doing this up here? But one.

Oh. That bad. Why won? Because the lady on the Instagram was doing one at a time. You can do one at a time. And also that's the handle, the pulley handle. Oh, you can take those off and put rope on, you can have a double handle on. You can click it usually on the metal button machine.

I've got to come up in asking. When are you going to just pop in? I don't do free gym anymore. I do like a strength and conditioning gym. I thought you meant money free. No, no, no, no, no. Like, you've got the integrity. I will pay.

Gotcha. Like, I don't, I really go to them anymore. I like them. I'm a class man now. Yeah. Or like, you know, there's like cages set up with barbells and free weights. Yeah, yeah. But, I mean, yeah, you...

I don't know how to... And it's funny, because at 4 a.m. There's no one that I'd ask. You know who give you a good workout? Chatsy-P-T. Oh. Chat-G-P-T. Because who, what are you doing to follow a workout right now?

Like, what is your workout? Just make it up. Yeah, so you need to... So last night. We need to hone in. We need to hone in on something. You need to set a goal. Is your goal weight loss?

Is it to tone up? Is it muscle? Can I just like my goal be to get up and do something. My goal, do you can move, for sure. This is, I know, a long-term goal. For sure, for sure. When I'm 65, I want to be able to get up and down off the floor. Yeah.

Like, genuinely, I look at my in-laws, I look at my parents, and I'm so impressed. Yeah. My mom especially, she's amazing. Yeah. And I fear, I'm struggling now when I'm 34. So that's my goal, to be functional in old age. I don't.

So you need to put your muscles and bones under load-bearing tension, which is weights. I did you keep thrust today? Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's good. Oh, yeah, yeah, wait. You need to be going into it with the right body groups per day. Like, are you going back of buys? Ah, okay. I am conscious of that.

Why do I tattoo, Peter? I've got my mate, ducker. Chest and tries. I'm doing. Legs. I trying. Maybe it's wrong. You tell me.

Kind of one for everything. A big leg movement, a big back movement, a big chest movement, and a big either arms, sort of either buys or tries. So it's like a full body every day. It's a full body every day because I know me. And when I used to train with the PT and it would just be chest and shoulder. I'm fucking bored and I didn't like it and now I'm on my own

without someone breathing down my neck I'm gonna entertain myself Yeah Do you know what I mean So I'm like at least if I'm moving around a lot Little full body stuff Little full body You see I reckon you'll get more benefit

From honing in on the muscle group per day And then yeah Then you can find more exercises To vary that So you can do different iterations But you know like Mondays I'm doing legs Tuesdays I'm doing chest And then a pull

I think it's all a mental shift for me Because I that to me sounds so boring Right Like, I have to do 35 minutes of just legs. My shoulders are going to get lonely. Would you do like a hit high intensity sort of vibe? So I have contemplated. Yeah, getting one of those apps.

You know, like your Kayla Itzines, your Steph Claire Smith, they've got those programs. But I'm also like, why do I need those? There's so much available for free on Instagram. And literally I watch other people at the gym. I'm like, oh, what's that guy doing? Oh, he's doing something where he drops. I don't know what things are called. But I copy, I watch him.

I go, I'll do that guy. No, that looks like it would work your bum, maybe. And then I do it. I go, oh, this is actually doing more for my legs. Okay. I think it's some sort of deadlift. It could be. He had two dumbbells in his hands, and he was slowly dragging him down.

Romanian deadlift. Yeah, I reckon that's what it was. Good for the hammies, good for the glutes. Yes, that felt very nice. Yeah, yeah. I like those. Yeah. Perhaps you want to come with me before the show?

Ah, no. Okay. Ah, no, thank you. So, and again, my thing right now is, let me see if I can actually keep doing it. Because 21 days the form I haven't. You know me. I'm a flash in the pan.

It's more now. Let's see if I can actually get into a routine. Then maybe we'll hone in. Are you finishing off each day with cardio? Oh, no, I finish each day with abs. Should I be fit? Oh, you can do ads as well. I remember you're on a step machine.

I start with cardio. You can, yeah, warm up. As a warm up, I did the stuff of machine today. I think finishing with cardio is better. Is that, I think, is that like to keep burning throughout the day or something? And it sort of helps. So how should I warm up then? stretch, dynamic stretching.

All right. Is that maybe, you know, doing some banded things? Banned things. You can do like the world's greatest stretch where you sort of bend over to your toes and you walk your hands out and you do the Spider-Man. That sounds like I feel great. Yeah, you do those. Do some of those.

Then you can do your weights and then you can do abs and then you can do cardio. And then end on cardio. Actually, that does make me look more impressive because sometimes I feel like people have started arriving as I'm leaving and I look like I haven't broken a sweat. Because when you finish with a side plane or a couple of crunches, it's not exactly. sweat-inducing. So I'm wrecking people, I'm leaving and people going, what should you even do here?

What she gets here so early? Yeah. So what time are you arriving at the gym every day? Ah, just for 4-4-30. Oh, man, I can't, I just, I'm... And I train till 515, I have a 5-minute get ready, and then I'm in the car by 5-20, 5-21. I just can't believe this is happening.

Bro, neither can I. Like, it just, it feels so... I'm so proud of myself. What world are we living in? I don't know. We're living in a world where I'm genuinely creaking. And it freaked me out. Hey, take something to get in to do it, you know?

Exactly. Like, man, I don't know if I'd train pre-show. Don't reckon I could do it. I, if anyone could do it, you could do it. Yeah, for sure I could do it. Because one, you're a morning person. Two, you prioritise exercise. And honestly, I won't be surprised if you go down this route once flows a bit older and

Morgan's back from Matt leave and you're on dad duty during the day. It's fucking impossible to prioritize yourself. Yeah. So the only time I can do it is before a show. It's before where Angus is still asleep and sometimes she's asleep or she's awake. Yeah. And Angus is. already feeding her breakfast.

It might get to that stage. I reckon, mark my words. God damn it. I don't wish it for you. The only thing for like, my gym does a class at 5am and it goes till 6. So it's like, ah, you know, there's no. Do you know what, though, if you're still with them in a year's time when maybe I think this transition will need to happen, maybe you can be like, guys, 430 class.

It's just me. If you do a 430, I'll come with you a 430 class. Yeah, do a 430. I can still go to my gym whenever I want, so I could roll in at 430. But then the thing is, I'd be there training and then they'll, rolling for the class at five. Exactly. And I'd be like, yeah.

Yeah, it'd be awkward. It does feel weird. Yeah. But anyway, hey. You do what you've got to do. That's it. You're going. Keep going.

I mean, ask me again next week. We'll see. Have you paid, though, now? I have paid. And it's month-long membership. So I'm locked in at least for a week. A month.

Okay. All right. Let's keep this up. Are you still a training show, guy? Yeah, you haven't in the last year because I've been moving and doing other stuff, but just haven't. You want to come at 430? Yeah.

Team 430. Team 430? Yeah, team 430 jog? Do you know, it's funny When I couldn't enter the gym today My past didn't work I literally was like I either go home

Or I go run around somewhere And then a nice lady let me in But I contemplated that for a hot second A little run But also in 430, it's terrifying Yeah, dark It's dark It is dark

It is dark It is dark But also there's something special About training when no one else is Like I'm grinding I'm grinding I'm out here working I always think

Arnold Schwarzenegger would be so proud of me Yeah, he would be He would He's a big advocate of like sleep quicker, you know, you're only got so many hours in the day. You sleep on your dad. Exactly. I always think, Arnie would be so proud of that.

He would be. His body's fucked now, though, from the years of Royce. And he's such, and he's such a contradiction. He's like, massive fitness, obviously, but smoke cigars daily. Yeah. Massive, like, Enviro Warrior drives a hummer. I'm like, bro, what are you about? I like Stolgi and my hot tub.

Big family man, cheated on his mishoe. Did he? Had a lot with the nanny. Yeah. I didn't do that. Yeah, I don't know if it's the actor son. I think it's another son. Yeah, had a baby with an annie.

And he was the mayor. He was the mayor of California. The governor. That's right, the governor. And did the Simpsons movie too. Yeah, I mean, he's done a lot. He has done a lot. Okay, we've all given an arnie fact, shy guy.

I don't know. He was Mr. Olympiad. I don't know. Many times. Yeah, bodybuilding champ of the world. That's how we got famous. He famously, no one believed in the movie twins with him and Danny DeVito. So he and Danny DeVito.

went to the production house and was like, you know what, just make it. You don't need to pay as a salary. We'll just take a cut of the film. It's one of his highest grossing movies. Good choice. Like payment-wise, because they were like, you're all right, you'll earn 20 bucks.

And he ended up earning a lot of money. Killed it. Killed it. Yeah. What an amazing man. It's like Matt Damon for Avatar. Same thing. He was offered not much money for the role,

but at 10% or maybe it was even 3% in the film's earnings. And he's like, ah, fuck you, I'm way too big for this. And then he's like, ah, that was the biggest earning film of all time. Was he originally going to be Sam Worthington? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's why they got an actor, I think, level of Sam Worthington, because it's kind of like he's sort of a nobody, but he is.

But, yeah. Because they backed the filming. Yeah. Why hasn't Sam Worthington exploded? Like, being in the biggest movie ever. I don't find him very watchable. And isn't it funny because, like, in Avatar, it's hardly him, is it? Yeah.

But I don't know, do you like him as an actor? It's all I know him from his avatar, and I love Avatar. But do I love Sam Worthington? That's a good question. He was in Animal Kingdom, wasn't he? In the Australian film. I believe. Okay.

But I don't know. Yeah. I would have thought if your name is attached to Avatar, you become a hot commodity. But not really. No, nothing really happened to him. Did you like Avatar 2? Yeah.

It's no Avatar 1. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not like, The Avatar World doesn't really do it for me that much. I'll see them. Yeah. But I'm not like as wowed by it as people sort of were. I fell asleep in the second one.

Really? Yeah, right in the middle. And then I woke up and I feel like I didn't miss anything. It was still going probably. It was still going. I enjoyed the second one. I enjoyed it. Oh, I like the Avatar world.

Yeah. I mean, it's just a rip-off of Pocahontas, but I loved Pocahontas as a kid. Ah, it really is, isn't it? Yeah. The navve. Besides the tails intertwining, he's literally Pocahontas. How sexy is when the tails intertwine?

That's hot. Fanny Flutters, you'd have sex as an avatar. For sure. I mean, if I could have the choice. What have I told you about role playing? Yeah, yeah. If I could dip Angus in blue. Oh, yeah, he'd be tall.

Become an eight-foot fucking thing running around. God, with like a penis tail. Don't, man. You're getting me all. bottom of the collar. Maybe tomorrow I can give you a list of the actors that have turned down movies that were meant to that were the first voice.

I always love hearing those. Yeah, yeah. I'll pick themselves. I was just say like a list of characters that you'd sleep with. We could do that. Best role play characters. I don't hate that. Well, as in like,

what you want your partner? Like, what would you love? In the bedroom? What would get you jizzing in your pants if Morgan dressed up and walked into the bedroom? I just couldn't take her seriously if she did role play. Yeah. I just, like, what the fuck is going on?

Like, he looks so ridiculous. I don't know how she would dress up as this, but if she dressed up as Margo Robbie in Wolf of Wall Street, you know, she does that pantiless and then puts her heel on his cheek. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I guess. Yeah, no, I've never, I've never been into role play. But you're an actor. I know, but I don't know.

Is that because he works, you work? That's it. That's it. I want to separate my lives. Yeah. What were you going to say, show I go? Play that student that you were. Yeah.

Preppy student number one. She does like to see me in the glasses and the polo. I'd love for you to come, like she comes home, and you're under the desk, recreating the earthquake scene. Quick, get down. Morgan, you be pulled to your Marty. I'll be. The size of the plates are shifting, Morgan, we've got to get down. You're telling me that doesn't get her hot and bothered?

It should. Me typing furiously on a keyboard. Wow, we've got to get down. He's print a lot of papers with that line on it The problem is Very good, yeah The problem is then I'd be like Then I'd be like

No sorry stop I just want to do it again I can do it better I can do it better We've got to get down I've got to find my truth Yeah You like that didn't you I really did

I'm gonna go home and say Hey Ang Wait I'm gonna record Angus I'll ask him Hey can we do a role play Can you be prepping your number one And I'll be Paul Chiiamardi

From San Andreas From San Andreas I didn't Fuck Paul Giamati Oh, Alexander Adairio. Yeah, but you're not in the scenes with her in the movie. You're in the Paul Giumardi world. She's in the rock world.

I shared a coffee with her, though, on set. She's gorgeous. She was a nice person. She was really nice. Her and the other guy in it, nothing really happened to him. And the kid was in Game of Thrones as well. Yes, yes. We all are there thinking, well, this is going to blow up our careers.

Next step for me, straight up. Alexandra went on to do Baywatch. Yeah, she did. The Rock again. Yeah. And you came to do. the radio show with little Jess Farcioni

I came to Newcastle I came to Newcastle Where would you rather be? Jess and Ducko in the morning Welcome to Wednesday

Good Morning friends Oh wow I mean big news guys Big big news overnight I don't know how we're all here Could we be the first

To share it With some rice cookers Like could you Have missed it If you've been awake For more than 10 seconds Possibly Okay, well, you heard it here first.

What have you heard? I had to break my noseband. Nah, we can get to that later. You actually did break your noseband. Oh, my runners gave me a blister yesterday, and I went, I think that's official. They're cactus. And Angus encouraged me to go and buy some new shoes. But that's not what people want to hear, don't know.

That's not the huge news that you may have missed. No. She's engaged. Travis proposed. Oh. You'll see this everywhere now for the next month. It's going to be really interesting today, especially. Yeah.

Because the news still has to be the news, you know, and there's some hard-hitting stuff. There is. Between every grim story, they're going to pepper in a new angle. Between the Mushroom Killer Trial, it's Taylor and Travis engaged. Absolutely. Insert another horrible development in Gaza, Taylor Swift engaged. Let's all go around and give one word to describe how we're feeling.

Shagai. happy for Taylor. That's a couple of words, Babs. I'm also really happy for Taylor. It's also a couple of words. Excited. Yeah. How you feel? I'm unsurprised, ducco. People are going, oh, called it. Of course you did. They're both consenting adults, clearly puppy dog eyes for each other. Yeah. It's all part of the plan, baby. It's all part of the plan. It looked beautiful, the engagement. Yeah, it looked, it looked bougie. And the ring. Well, we're speculating off of how much the ring costs. We're thinking. Babs with the

unbelievable insight somewhere between 13. 30 grand or a million dollars. So we're going to narrow it down, hopefully. I think it's going to be closer to the mill. No, no. I reckon Travis is a tight ass. Yeah, yeah. Imagine that.

Here's a 30K ring, Taylor. We know she's a billionaire. Yeah. What's he pulling in? Millions. Millions. I don't know if he's a billionaire. Like NFL contracts a million.

Yeah, yeah. He's in the millions. Yeah, yeah. He has been for a while. But she's the breadwinner, though. Totally. I wonder if he's gone, hey, can we join credit cards yet? Yeah, sure, honey.

I see our future. Cool. I've just got to make a big purchase. I want to buy this ring. Can you keep Tuesday afternoon free? When you join money, buying the ring's always tricky. I had to do that for us. What did you do?

Because you guys combined finances really early and started your lives together. Luckily my uncle was the jeweller. So I had to go, hey, I'll pay you. I just give me the ring first. And then I had to get it. And then I just had to pay it from our combined money, like even though it was both of ours. But it was like, what do I... Because it is that classic thing.

Like even if you had separate money, separate accounts, at the end of the day, you are joining your life. Exactly. That comes with a joint responsibility. finances. She needs to share the burdens. I'm still paying off that ring. But you're right, doing stuff like that. You have enough trouble buying Christmas presents that you don't see the ring. Yeah, 100%. It's ridiculous. I've got zero shared like individual accounts. Yes, yes. I'm sure Travis has some separate accounts. I don't have there be a pre-up in this. Surely. Surely.

Spoken like a true unbeliever in love. What's the pre-nup? I mean, there have to be. She's not silly. She's a proper business woman. She's got to protect her. herself. The empire she's built, she's already had to fight off a lot of scoundrels to protect it. Not calling Travis a scoundrel, but yeah, they'd be a pre-num. Will this Babs? Will this affect her music quality now? Because now she's in love, it'll be happy. There'll be no sad stuff. I think that'll be nice, though. For a bit, and then you'll want some sadness. You'll want the darkness. Ask Shark Guy how he feels about that.

The sad music. Oh, Taylor needs divorce for albums. That's what I told Babs in the lift. All over all the relationships have meant album success. Yeah, well, that's all thinking. So, no, this will be the test shy guy. She's about to release the life of a showgirl, right? Which we know will be upbeat and positive. It's bubbly and upbeat.

Because she's written it while she's in this relationship, which has not ended. And it covered the Ears to her, which was very successful. If this album tanks, we know Happy Taylor does not. Yeah, it does not sell. But also, could this be the end? Is she like, oh, I'm done now? No, she'll never stop. But if you don't like me happy world, I'm not going to, I'm not going to give up my happiness just to make music.

People will like her happy songs, even if they don't like them. You know what I mean? I think she's done enough for us. Go to the back catalogue for the sad songs. What's Travis net worth? 90 mil. He can afford one on a ring. Isn't it,

isn't it hectic when 90 mil sounds so pov? In comparison? What is Taylor? Taylor doesn't have to be... It's billions, right? Or at least like... She was one of the first hours to crack the billion marks. Yeah.

Her and Jay-Z. 1.6 billion in October last year. God damn. So it's only grown. Probably. My wife, you know, a huge Taylor fan. Obviously, we were at the concert in a box. That's right.

You both love folklore. Huge folklore people. I woke her up this morning. She'd had to feed the baby at 3 a.m. But I thought, I got a text from you, Jess. You brought the news to me saying, Travis and Taylor engaged. I was ecstatic. I went into my room.

Well, I wanted you to be prepared to start making a package. Well, yeah, and I've prepared it. I know you did. I went into my room and I woke Morgan up. Forgive. I'm going to have to translate a bit after. It's only quick, but there's rain sounds because we sleep in a tsunami. But this is me telling Morgan.

The Alan Duckers can't sleep unless it's hurricaneing in their bedroom. We can't. I have a rain machine and so does she. Okay. Here we go. Morgan. Travis and Taylor re-engaged. Travis and Taylor are engaged.

I just thought you wanted to know. If you had to have to what you do. Oh, this is big, f***, use. All right. Just the moose. She goes, can you open Flo's door when you leave? I was like, Morgan, who can you open? He's about flow.

There are priorities here, Morgan. There are priorities. She's like, thanks for waking me for that. Damn it. I should have gone into my husband. My husband's probably learning it just with us right now. He'd be full wood at home right now. Oh, absolutely.

Just loving life. Massive bad blood guy. Hey, it's a big show, though. That won't dictate the show. We've still got Alpha Bucks. We got Chagai dips today. We got a core-fame prize. Box of cereal up for grad.

Taylor's out there getting one million-dollar engagement rings. What we're giving you rice cookers? Jeez bits. Yes and daco Yes and daco Big news Oh my God Do you reckon they need a celebrant?

How do I? You should jump in I reckon I can afford you I reckon The only people who can Yeah How do I get in front of them

Yeah Taylor and Travis is getting days If you miss it You're going to see it everywhere On socials That's a good one You should try to do it Oh I'll tweet her

Yeah Hey Tay I'll do your discount I'm in Yeah, I'll pay for my flights. I get a lot of rice cookers asking me for a discount. I'm a big fan of the show, can have a discount.

I'm like, no. Not helping. Mommy's got bills to pay. Yeah, but for Taylor. Taylor, though. The richest person on the planet. Yeah, I'll give you a discount. Think that's how the rich stay rich, ducco, because they keep getting discounts.

Free stuff. Oh, I'll work on that. Send her a DM. I reckon she'll see it. I'll send her my packages. Grande or piccolo. She just wants to do an elopement. I could also just do the paper.

Imagine if they eloped. Their wedding's going to be so big. It's going to be ridiculous. Maybe that's why they are low. Oh, yeah, because they invite to be people. And they just release the photos, sell the photos to Vogue or something. As if they weren't, as if they weren't do a full wedding expo and then have a doco on the wedding leading up to it, plus the actual wedding itself. I mean, if Kim Kay did that, Taylor and Travis, why wouldn't they?

It would be big. It'd be big. Why wouldn't they? They've got so many friends, big families. Yeah, it's going to be big. Oh, my God. You made a great point. His brother, Jason, hell of a character.

Best man speech will go off. Oh, my God. He'll obviously, would he be like a you? Best man MC. Oh, what are they going to get to MC? Oh, man. Do we do a do-a-do package deal? Little old Jess and Ducko from Australia.

Are you happy to cover your own travel? Yeah, I'll cover my travel. I'll do that. Who's to say they won't pick Australia? They'll probably go, hey, like everyone else. Can we get you to MC and not pay you and just do it for the love? What? It's an honour, Ducco.

It's an honour. It's not. All right, I'll submit us as a package. Yeah, okay, good. Celebrant MC. Oh, good. Come on. All right.

Here we go. We'll just let her into their DMs. It'll work. Actually, Shargo, can you get on to them? Yeah, maybe it'll look better if we had a manager. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're a manager. Why don't we take the show?

We'll do the show from the wedding. I like that. I like it a lot. Except perhaps it doesn't have to stay here to answer phones. Yeah, we'll put something else on. That's so annoying. We won't need phones. It'll just be war-to-wall wedding coverage.

No phone is necessary. I love that. You like the Royal Wedding. Let's get the show on the road for the wedding. Wall-to-wall wedding coverage. Oh, I've... There's something here, guys. There's something here.

I reckon we're the only ones who have thought of it, too. Yes and Ducco Hey you got some fun stats on men Male haircuts Fun and stats don't often go in the same sentence But I love that that's what you brought to the table today About just like different cuts men like to get But also the haircut anxiety men get

So apparently this survey of 2,000 people Great sample size Right, good size right Wow 1 5 men get hair cut anxiety They 21% feel nervous asking their stylist or barber For a new hairstyle And 23% have been afraid to ask for

specific hair cuts, so just get the same cut. Have you ever felt like this, Ducko? Absolutely. You have, we take great pride in your hair. It always looks good, but have you gotten into a habit of like, this is what looks good, so I better not... This is what I do. Go out of bounds.

Well, that's when it goes into, you need to know about your hair specifically to know what looks good, right? Because you've tried before. I've tried. So I can do, I've got the, like, the 1960s classic comb over, because of my massive cow lick, or I can shave my head. There's not what else I can do. So I went into my hair.

dresser, Brandon. You know, I love Brandon. Brandon's a great friend of the show. I think we love Brandon. I never met him. Brandon's been a character on the show a few times. He listens in on the drive. He's probably listening right now. Good morning to you. Brandon. And one of the great names. No one cuts hair like Brandon. The man's got the mightest touch. Have you got Spongon? No, I don't. I pay for Brandon full prize. I still gets all these love. Yeah, yeah. You must be a very happy customer. He's just, he's a real friend, you know. He sometimes gives me lollies. He loves Halloween, Brandon. Huge Halloween guy. He always gives me lollies. Oh, that's fantastic.

But Brandon, I went into him with a photo of Tom Holland once. I had the fringe down. I said, I want this. And Brandon said, you can get that today and it will look good. But the reality of this hairstyle, the up keeps ridiculous. You won't be able to maintain it. And then you're going to look like an idiot. Do you know what?

That's what you want. Yeah, you're the truth. From your beauticians, your hairdressers, stylus. You'll want people to go, you don't look like him. And you don't have the resources to continue this. So he said, you know, Fury, the movie with Brad Pitt, where we had the big undercut. Fury. Yes, the war movie.

And Shilabuff's in it. And he had the big undercut and he had the shave sides. Everyone was coming and wanting that. And he's like, I can give you that and you'll look cool today. But then you're going to look like an idiot for a while. You're going to have to come in for a week and I'm going to have to give you lessons on how to do your hair. This is the classic thing. I'm sure Babs can back me up.

When the ladies go through, I think I want a full fringe. I want the bangs Dakota Johnson style. Oh my God. Fringe is a statement where something's happened to you. You know? My 21st birthday. The day before, I was like, I'm going to cut a fringe. And exactly that, Darko, it looked cool the next day.

Oh, my God. You spend the next six months trying to grow it out. You do. Okay, so I appreciate men a go. I didn't know men felt this way as well. Yeah, so apparently 36% say that they go and show a reference photo of what they want. I know, our boss, Jace, went and showed a photo of me, you know, when he wanted to grow his hair out again. I was going to say, what, when he just had this.

Now he's just shaved it. Now he just shaved it. So he said the men get so much anxiety. Majority of them will let it grow out, fully. shaved is the second most common or bald is the second most common hairstyle. You've had a panic and you don't know what you're on. Middle part long hair's up there. Getting the side, the high side part. I presume that's what I have. The side part. Yep. And then the mullet surprisingly low. You don't see too many boys with the middle part. That feels very... But like, my and shy guys are very different. Yes, but also very

different textures. Textures. Consistencies. Like what he could do, I couldn't and vice versa. Yes. You got to play to your strengths. That's what they're saying. But they're saying a lot of men get anxiety about it. The average man gets a haircut 10 times a year. I would have thought less. That's more than, that's less than once a month. I go every five weeks. Okay.

One of my mates, one of our mates, every two weeks. Yeah, so some people who are really, yeah, who are really into it, get the fades and stuff. The fade? Yeah, it's financially. Which is your hair growing that you need it every two weeks? Doesn't want a hair out of place. It's a bit ridiculous.

Yes. But anyway, they're just saying that the key is getting a good barber, learning them, and learning your style. And having open comms with your barber. You know what I mean? Maybe you take in a packet of lollies. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Start that relationship with your barber. Yeah. Well, I'm in a fantasy football team with Brandon too. So, you know, we have a lot of connection. And he's not giving you any discounts. Brandon, what are you doing? Hey, I don't want to, you know, I'm not about that. I'm happy to pay for a price.

Jesus Christ, I haven't paid for hair in about 10 years. Jess and ducco in the morning. Jess and ducos 10K Alphabet on. It's up for bugs. 30 seconds, 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. Have to take your first answer. Can not use the same answer twice. If you're unsure of the questions, say pass.

We come back if there's time. We are playing for 10K. And our player today is Craig. Hello, Craig. Good morning, team. How are we? Craig, we couldn't be better. We have the opportunity to give you 10 grand.

We are pumped up. Are you pumped up as I can be right at the moment. So let's go. Craig's all fired up because Taylor and Travis are engaged. That's the main reason he's fired up. I mean, Craig. Are you feeling the love, Craig? Completely, absolutely.

Craig loves love. Huge love guy. What's not to love? Amen, brother. What do you want to spend with 10 grand? Look, I really want to get the kids out and about. They've had a few rained out weekends with sports, so a quick trip up the Goldie and a theme park run around could do the trick, I reckon.

Fantastic. Do either of your kids play lacrosse, Craig? No, lacrosse is not on the radar. been good if they did because your letter's L. Oh my goodness. You're going to work with L. L's not bad. Come on.

Come on. You're ready, Craig? Go for it. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter L. We need you to name an active wear brand. Lululemon. An international city.

Lima. A four-letter word. Long. A body part. Leg. An instrument. Lime. A singer.

A pass. An insect. Pass. A verb. Lengthen. A type of pasta. Linguini. A musical.

Lion King. Oh no. God damn. Craig was out the gate. He was good, was he? Wow. We're on he. Lion King would have given you eight.

It was obviously after the buzzer. Even instrument, liar. Oh, my God. Oh, where your brain went like that? A leap up international city. Hello. Gee, someone can play. Someone has...

So the only ones then you didn't answer, a singer, Lady Gaga. Of course. And an insect. Ladybug? Oh, my goodness. Two ladies. Fray. Let down by the ladies.

Let down by the ladies. Oh, my God. Oh, wow. You're a great player, mate. You're unreal. Look, you don't go away empty-handed. You do get $100 suspended woolies, though, okay? Love your work, guys.

Thanks very much for the chance. You can't take the kids to the Gold Coast. But you could take them down aisle four and get them some cereal. Hey, how fun's that? Some fun cereal. Serial is the best. Craig. Isn't it, Charles?

Be listening to Shy Guy Dips after seven. Oh my God, Craig, come back. Play Shy Guy Dips. Oh, that'd be fun. He's sorted out. Thanks, Craig. Have a great day. Cheers, guys.

We play again, 8 o'clock. $10,000. What a legend. He's a good, dude. He was a good player, too. You can tell. His kids are going to grow up smart. Up next, though.

What have got, Jess? Speaking of smart. More chances at the call of fame. No, no, what are we got? What are you got? I have a big question to ask. What do you got? What's the worst thing to come on your face?

All right. I want to put this out there. This wasn't my idea. What are you thinking of? You dirty bird. Jess and Ducco. 131060, I want to know what's the worst thing to come on your face. Yeah, the face!

Okay. And where, and what are you thinking here? When I opened the dishwasher. Oh, yeah. After it's been on. Oh, that's what you're calling it. The worst thing to come on your face is that. puff of air.

Oh, steam. You know, that's steam? Yeah, yeah, I do know that steam. It's hot. It's hot. And it smells funny. It does smell funny, doesn't it? Hence, for something that should be clean.

It's like, it's like, I imagine. You lead this. You lead this. I'd imagine hosties would say the flight from L.A. to Australia when I open the door. The disembarkation crew who are on the ground. Oh, man. What does the captain say of flight attendants? The cabin crew is clear for opening.

You can tell someone's had a bit in a coddle. I think they actually turn the mic, the speakers off in business. They come and tell you firsthand, you're allowed to leave, get out before the peasants, quick. Do you know all my favourite parties? Just quickly pivot, how the flight attendant, the flight attendant stands guard. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And blocks us off, yeah. All the zombies are back there like, eh.

When we landed back in Sydney, the guard hadn't put it, got into a position yet. And some bloke in economy opened the curtain, and Angus literally went, whoa, whoa. Get back. Yuck. I can feel I'm catching whatever you have. It was such a Freudian slit from me. He literally was like, whoa. I'm like, I guess they're allowed.

They are people too. Yeah. Anyway. Back to the dishwasher. Sorry, yeah. You get it, man. It's exactly it. Empting the dishwasher yesterday.

And maybe because the dishwasher thinks, ah, I finish up. And I'm going to have 10 minutes an hour, maybe even overnight to dissipate and calm down. But I don't muck around, man. I'm like, oh, it's done. Open. Yeah. Hot, yeah, it gets out. That hot, steamy, stinky, puff of air.

Yeah. That's the worst thing to come on your face. Interesting. For me, I mean, I get a similar vibe when I boil my veggies. I steam my veggies and I open the Tupperware container and I get that hit. I get that hit up the heat. Wait, how do you steam? Are you doing in the microwave or something?

And it's hot. I always grab it with my hand. Open it. What? Why is it so stinky and I get, why, it's hot. Yeah, the hot veggies. What is that? I don't know.

So you put that up there as the worst thing to come on your face. I reckon it's the worst thing to come on your face. Okay. Interesting. Shy guy. Don't shake your head at me. Come on. The dishwasher is a good one.

Thank you. What else you got for us? I hate when it like rains sideways. Oh, it's raining sideways. And you're walking. Thank you, Ali. That is a bad thing to kill with you. Because even with an umbrella or your hood up.

I don't carry an umbrella. And the hood up doesn't matter if it's coming sideways. Because then you've got to like squint and your hair's all wet. What are you walking in the rain and when it's raining side? Like when does it? that actually happened to you? It's happened a few times. What have you got against umbrellas?

Are you too cool for an umbrella? Way too cool for one. No, I've gone in the car, but I'd never go get it. I often think that, like... Yeah, I never use money either. I was having it. I'm like, you know, what's the point?

I'll just cop it. Yeah. I picture, but it's funny because I've got one. When you're raining, when you're, sorry, when you're raining and your hair gel that you've got in as a dude, gets wet and then it leaks into your eyes. That comes in your face. That's the worst thing to come on your face.

For me, that's on board now? That's on board. Sticky. Yeah, and then you look like it looks like you're leaking. Everyone's like, why are you pouring up? Are you anti-umbrella as well?

I'm not a huge umbrella guy. I feel like nothing looks more dumb than walking with an umbrella. Yeah, agree. See, but I picture a sad guy with those umbrellas, you know how the handles a hook? Yes.

And you can hook it over your wrist? Oh, absolutely. I picture him doing that. And he's swinging it around. You're too mandy for an umbrella. I will never. We got another Jess who loves this segment. Jess, worst thing to come on your face?

Yeah, hey guys. I'm going to top you one and say, what's the worst thing to come on your face? end in your mouth. I work in health, and we call it granny glitter when you have to assess someone's foot and you take off their sock and all the dead skin cells come out on your face and you swallow it. Oh, that is rank.

Granny glitter. I've never. Yeah, we don't get paid enough. Let me tell you. No, you do not. Yes. Oh, my God. In the face.

That's a double whammy. We've got a two for one. Yep. Yes. You can taste it. You took tomorrow's boat topping. What's always if to come in your mouth. That's face and mouth.

Oh, just give her the call of fame now. She needs a dinner out. Yeah, jeez. That's a doozy, Jess. I mean, that's a better thing to go in the mouth, that's for sure. Amen. I'm sure EXP, Frank Faulkner, head chef. I'm sure he's really happy about this.

I love Frank. I love Frank. The best food ever. Oh, there you go. Someone's working hard. Get some more granny glitter. Yes. That makes my dishwasher steam look like bloody child's play.

All right, 13, 1060. You get the gist. You get the juice. What's the worst thing to come on your face? That's cool. What's the worst thing to come on your face? My nomination was just after the dishwasher finishes. It's had no time to, I guess, swallow the steam.

Yeah, I guess it does, it dries it a little bit. Yes. When you open it damp and moist, it ain't good. You immediately open, Jesus, like being punched in the face with this waft. Why is it so stinky? I don't know. Why is it my finish leaving a nice over? But that puff, it's got to be the worst thing to come on your face.

Like when we had the rice cooker call up and tell us, have you actually looked when you open the hinge of your dishwasher door, how dirty it is in that thing? You've got to clean that. That's probably why. It's none of my business, okay. That's the dishwasher's business, not mine. Nicole DM'd us.

What'd you say? My husband and I were in a park eating fish and chips when he opened one of those little ta-tah sources. Tartare? Tata. He squeezed it, but it was a dodgy one. So instead of going down onto his fish and chips, it's gone straight into Nicole's face.

Oh, that's a bad one. Not a great thing to come on your face, a tart air. In the eye. Mine was hair gel on the eye when it rains. Yes. We don't like that. We don't like that. But we just had Jess say she works in health and pulling off an old person's sock and getting a face and mouthful of dead skin come off with the sock.

God, they do good work, don't they? She said it and we'll reiterate. Not paid enough. Shaz, good morning. Good morning. You're going. Yeah, great. You are shas.

Yeah, Shaz. Worst thing to come on your face. What are you got for? us. Well, brace yourselves. So I work in animal care. So just like healthcare, I will also echo the in your face, on your face and in your mouth. I've worked in an aquarium and I also now currently work with cats and dogs, but I have had all manner of things on my face from like fish guts to dog we. Oh, what's the worst? Like surely fish cuts is up there with the worst. Yeah. I mean, it's hard because like when I was in the

aquarium, I was pretty much constantly in the water. So constantly wet, it would kind of wash off pretty easily. How is the guts getting on? Are you cutting them open? Yeah, yeah, because we cut them up. We feed them to the animals. Yeah, but sharks and stingrays. Oh, isn't it funny?

Say, here I am going, no, but fish are the creatures. No, but for Shaz, fish of the food. Fish of the food. Oh, I don't want to see. That'd be gross. And dog pee as well. Yeah, dog pee. Yark.

That's fun. That's just rude. Oh, Shaz, you've had a few things there. You've had a few things where you don't want. Do you have a part? partner, Shaz? I do. Lucky, you come at home, give us a kiss, and you've just had fish guts in your mouth.

You know, it's tough. Yeah, he's actually, he's got a really sensitive sense of smell. So pretty much the first thing I do when I come home is I have to have a shower. Yeah, yeah, get the gurney out. Get the gurney out. Get the piss and guts off your chest. That's what I do to my wife. I should come back from cardiac surgery.

I'm clean. I don't care. Is that a bit of organ tissue, honey? Don't worry about it. Kayla, good morning. Hi, how you doing? Yeah, good. Ask Kayla, Ducker.

Kayla, worse thing to come on your face? So, it's not my face, it was my husband. Yeah, yeah. So, a friend's cat jumped on my lap, but his butt was facing my husband. And I patted him, he got scared, and, you know, the cat's anal plan? It, like, squirted right at my husband's face

and into his mouth. And he said it was, like, the consistency of, like, balsamic glazed vinegar. And he can't eat that ever again. Okay. I have learned so much in your conversation, in this conversation case. Oh, that makes me so sick. I didn't know cats express from the anal glands. Now, I'm not familiar with the cat's anal glands.

When you give a cat a fright, they express, like, vinegar-esque stuff. Oh, man. sell it anyone. Your partner can't come back from that. Like, that's the end. No. Do you think about that every time you smooch him, Kayla? No, but it is a great conversation and, you know, laughing dope with friends and everything.

What do you do for work, mate? Well, I can tell you of what I've had cat's anal glance discharge in my face. You can never go back to that friend's house. You can't. I'd move countries. Oh, Pete. Petey Yeah

Hey guys No yeah you ask Pete Pete Pete Pete worse thing to come in the face What do you got Uh mate Look happened the other week

Actually Um mate of mine rings me up Says he's got a 12 set of minivan He does a bit of work With kids around the place Horrible smell in the back of it He says oh look You've got this horrible smell

In this minivan Do you want to have a look at it He said I think it might be The air conditioning and duck So Pete In his whiz and jumps in Has a look ribs the back panel out of it Finds the smell's in the back panel of it

Get me phone out Take a photo Yep no worries at all It's full of water thought, all right, dank water in the back corner because we had all that water recently. So how are we going to get his water out? So Pete proceeds to grab a Phillips head screwdriver, get underneath his minibus with a hammer

and build a hole in it. And as I did, yeah, the water was a bit dank, so it splashed a load me and a bit on the face as you do and down the arms and probably inhaled a bit of it. And we thought, oh, yeah, no worries, we got all this out. So I stick your head over the back inside the van to see when we got all the smell out. You use this dead rat or mouse laying in it. Oh.

Was it like the fluid from the rat, Pete? He's been marinating in this water. You'd be full of marinating in this water. I'd actually taken a photo of this rat in this water, and I had to deluge it out of my phone because there's no way I can look at it again. No. It was like puffed up. Oh.

Oh, so bloated like a dead body. Sick. Yeah. It was probably more like a mouse because it had blown it up. Yeah. Yeah. Mouse rat. We don't discriminate.

This animal had been in there for a couple of weeks. Oh. Oh, Pete. And then, you decide to float, yeah. Oh, Pete. I've done some disgusting things, and then proceed to get it out of there and throw it in the garden. I'm like, see, I'm out of here. Yeah, get out of there.

Get some Colgate, Pete, and get out of that. Jess and Ducko. I reckon producer shy guys having a glass of milk. Glass of milk and a little biscuit, aren't you? My moot, my milk. Shy guy dips. I'm so excited. I want shy guys fuck.

As you should be, every Wednesday, we dip, baby. The stakes couldn't be higher. Uh-uh. You could win a swell. of exclusive JD merch, fridge magnet, bottle opener, jiz beer. But you win an unopened box of cereal. And that's the big key, I think.

Which will put in one of my glass jars. The Mutti. Today's a huge day for cereal. Shiga came in with a pep in his step this morning. I don't want to give a clue where it's not my place to give a clue, shy guy. But if I may, clearly went back to one of the main supermarkets. He's gone to a big provider, I believe. We're not, yeah, we're not down Albi, I don't think.

He was getting a bit concerned. Oh, run out of Woolies and Coles options. Which are obviously the big staple shops. Yes. He was going to American super stores. He was going to your LD's. This one looks a little more generic to me, shy guy. Mm-hmm.

That's a good clue. Okay. Are you going to give another clue? I'll give another clue. Okay. 131060, by the way, first came off the rain and gets this clue plus another. So really, you're sort of getting three. This is a triple.

It's a triple crown. There are three, four, five types of fruits on the box. Three, four, five. Just have another count. Just in the bowl of cereal also on the box, and I saw more. Do five types of fruit on the box mean there are five types of fruit in the cereal? Oh, he's not giving any more. It can't be a quadruple ground.

It can't. It's a big day. Shai Kamey said, oh my God, it's Shogga-Dips and Taylor and Travis are engaged. And I said, mate. I'm pulling out a biggie. Jeez. You sit down. I'm pulling out five types of fruit on the box.

Jess and Ducco. I can produce a shy guy's having a glass of milk. Glass of milk and a little biscuit, aren't you? My milk, my milk. I'm so excited. I want shy guys' fuck. One thing that Taylor and Travis are engaged. Yeah, snore.

Yep. We got a box of cereal to give away. We do. And a jeez bit and a fridge magnet. Eternal glory. Maybe naming rights to a fish. I don't know. You know.

How good this game is for you to win it. It just keeps getting better and better. We have heard there are five type. of fruit on the box. Definitely five. Whether that means they're also in the cereal remains to be seen. He hasn't told us that. So true.

You also gave away another clue. I did. I said he's gone back to Woolworths or Coles. I don't think they stock this at Eldie. It's certainly not one of those American Superstore ones. No. Sophie's called through. Good morning, Soff.

Good morning. As the first caller, you get another clue, babe. What have you got for Sophie? There's a red ribbon across the top of the box. Oh, wow. I don't know about the word ribbon. Borda? Yeah, I'm not going to say ribbon, but...

Ribbon is confusing. Yeah, border works. Anyway. So if you've got to translate shy guy here, what is the cereal? Oh, I'm not sure anymore. Oh, no. The red ribbon's throwing you. I think the red ribbon's thrown it.

What did you have? I had trick-six fruity shape. It's not that. Not that, so. 13-1060. If you think, you know, Or you want to have a crack at it. We give another clue to Val.

Good morning, Val. Good morning. Val. There's the red ribbon, which ribbon in inverted commas, five types of fruit on the box. What else have you got? Hang on, Val. We'll give you a clue.

Yeah. It's like... Hang on, Val. Hold on. All right. Shagai, you go then, Val. I'll go now, Val. Okay.

It's kind of like... Val, hang on. Shy guy, get in there. There's a lot of these, or with sort of like one or two words. There's a big variety. Jesus, that's give you. Jesus. No, you know.

Oh, Val, that should definitely seal it for you. Okay, now, Val, you go. Yeah, you go. Yeah, it shouldn't be easy, but the boxes I'm looking at doesn't have a red ribbon on it. So that has really thrown me. Are you at the supermarket now, Val? I wish I was. But no.

Oh, bugger. Yeah. Let's go through this. is you going to get a val what are we got are you in your cupboard looking at all where do we find val today uh no i'm sitting in my work truck and uh yeah sort of just trying to google

have a quick look oh i see you're on the google when she said i'm looking at him i'm like where i understand val what's your nomination what's your guess no i was thinking just right because it has the has the fruit on it but it just doesn't have the ribbon unfortunately yeah that's correct val thanks for playing though call it next week

Andrew on 13 1060 huge Serial guy, good morning to you. Morning, guys. Andrew, you get another clue. Yeah, quick shy lord. Yep. Yeah, Andrew. Babs would love this cereal.

Oh. Bads. Considering she's probably the same, same sort of mentality as my daughter, who's a five-year-old. Kellogg's fruit loops. It's a sledge. Savage! It is not, though. Andrew had that locked and loaded ready to come.

He just wanted to do Babbs clip. I love that, Andrew. Um, fruit loop. Does fruit loop have actual fruit on the box? This has five fruits. It's a main player. It's got a red band around the top. Ribbon.

Ribbon. Sorry, ribbon. I banned ribbon. We got to Zanthe. Good morning, Zanthe. Morning. Zanthi, we've heard there's a red ribbon. There's five fruits on the box.

Babs would like it. Now, that's, that is actually a good clue, but you've really got to know the inner workings of Sweet Babs, particularly. Why would Babs like it? Her body, her body, her, you know, what, by extension, you. Yeah. But Zanthi, you get another clue, Dahl. Yep. Okay.

That's really true. What are these little, what are these things called? I think they're rice puffs or something. Like five of bits? I don't think I need another clue. Oh, hang on. I'm struggling, so. Okay, because Shaga's not really doing his job.

No. What are you got for us, Zanthi? I think it's the Uncle Toby's fruit bites. Oh, Jesus, you are flirting with it, sis. Uncle Toby is in the realm. It is in the realm. He's Uncle Tobeys. Oh, you've done the hard yard, Zanthi.

Oh, my God. Now, let's put it together. Yeah. Nick, good morning. Morning, guys. How are we? Yeah, great. You heard Zanthi say Uncle Tobis.

I really didn't think it was Uncle Toby. Well, it is. So come on work with us. It's Uncle Tobies. It's fruit. The big one is Babs and Ducko would need this cereal. Yeah. Have that in your brain.

Shy guy. Give him another clue. It looks like there's some sort of like a wood grain background. Oh, Jesus. He's really chilling down on the box. What about not minus? Because it's a very simplistic packaging. Nick, come on.

Come on. Special pay? 13, 1060. Ducco literally just gave it away. Not minus. Who was listening? 13, 10, 60. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We need to get this thing out. Grainy wood on the box. You're closing getting worse. This is a very simplistic looking packet. Talk more about the name of it. I want to give it away. I think it's too easy. I think it's gone on long enough.

Give it away. I think we're ready to give it. I think, by the, you know, they're coming in now. Not minus. The giveaway, really. Shire's it doing that I gave that clue away. What is it? Ducco dips?

No, it's shy guy dips. It's a great clue. Thank you, mate. You can take that clue and learn from it's green. Like, it's green. You can go. There's a big circle. Yeah, yeah.

There's a big circle. With one word in it. This is, yeah. This is what makes this show great. This is what makes this show fantastic. Talk more about. about the rumballs on the back. Maybe that had helped someone.

What are they? Oh, for a tasty brecky treat on the go. Try blending apricots, chigger seeds and almond butter with your favourite, not minus cereal. We've got a full board of calls that Babs is desperately going through right now.

She's just trying to see if someone's cold. She's trying to pick the best wine. I think she's trying to find someone here. Katie. Okay, here we go. Thank goodness. Katie, Katie, Katie. Put us out of that misery.

Okay, let's do it. So, it's the Uncle Toby's purple box that says plus antioxidants, cranberries and blueberries's flavor. You're so close. It's not right. It's not right. Really? It's plus. It is plus, but she's gone.

If she stopped there, we could have given it to her, but she said antioxidant. Oh, there's no antioxidant. It's not, it's not. You know what, Katie? Yeah. It's not the antioxidant one. What is it? Okay.

Quickly. Okay. Quickly. It is the... Yeah. Protein? No. Plus, the almighty.

You've got two choices. I hate this game today. It is Uncle Toby's plus. It's not antioxidant and it's not protein. Oh, yeah. I think there's one more. Yeah, there's one more. This is it.

I mean, clearly no one buys this cereal. I actually love this cereal. There you go. That's why you're so regular, Dahl. That's why your fibres and poos are all gravy. The fibres and poos are green. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

Do we go back to Katie? Here we go. Here we go, all right. Ebony, come on. Do you need a clue, Ebony? No, I believe that it's Uncle Toby's plus five off. All right, Ebony. You need to get this in one pair.

Okay, I'll try my best. Okay, here we go, here we go. Hi, my name's Ebony, and I'm so excited I just want Shy Guy's box. Okay, Rowland, Ebony and Echo. Hi, my name is Ebony, and I'm just so excited I just want Shy Guy's Box. I know we don't have the time, Ducko, but it's got it. We've got to get it. We're just out of there.

We're running very late, but you're doing so well, Ebony. Hi, my name's Ebony, and I'm so excited. I just want Shy Guy's Box. I just want Shy Guy's Box. And action. Hi, my name is Ebony, and I'm so excited. I just won Charga's Box. Yes!

Yesterday had the pleasure of doing some daddy-daughter content for something that's coming out for Father's Day. Your first Father's Day, Ducko. Correct, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Very sweet. Very exciting. And Flo obviously remembers everything and it's just so with it. Absolutely. She's a great little co-star.

Co-star. She's in all your content. So first spawn call, and I'll tell you what, she turned it on. Like she was, when the cameras were on and the people were around, got cute, looked at the camera when she needed to. Like, I was like, all right. I mean, the girl can barely hold her own neck up. Yeah. When she knows the camera's on, she turned it on.

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, doesn't it? I was very proud of her. I was very proud. She's a little show girl. Good on you. Hello. But I had to bring, I had to bring,

my wife came along because. Great pivot. Thank you. When we were filming this, I knew I needed a Flo Rangler, as in like, we're getting changed in different outfits and we're doing things.

You can't be player coach. In times like this. I'm also co-star, so it's like I had my own trailer. Oh, there's a lot. Flo had her trailer, like all that sort of year. Yeah.

So Morgan had to come along to, you know, just take flowing between the shots, whatever. Yeah. So you're the star. I ain't changing no poo-wey nappy. You're going to need to be on,

On hand for that, Morgan. Actually, luckily, she didn't per se if I were filming. She knew. She did a lot, though. I was like, don't bomb on the clothes, sweetie. We've only tucked the tags in for these, for these shoes. We don't actually own these clothes. Don't do this.

But Morgan started off, because she doesn't normally come to those things, but she started off not saying much in terms of when I was trying, because, like, I was getting stalled to things, and they were giving me clothes to wear and I'd come out of, you know, change room, whatever. And then by the end of the day, like, a couple of hours we've been going. But a few hours later, I'm in the change. room. And I hear one of the people who works at the shop coming with the clothes and a hat. And Morgan's like,

oh, no, no, no. Flapperum hats don't suit his head shape. He can't wear a flap room hat. He's going to look ridiculous in that. And it was, oh, no, those pants are way too baggy for his size. So she's built up a bit of confidence here. Oh, no, his waist size will not match that. That don't work. I don't think that looks going to look good on him. It went from just being like, whatever you want to. That's great. To be like, oh, no, he's going to look ridiculous in that. He'll look

like a clown in those pants. She's like, by association, this is going to bring me into disrepute. So I best Step in and speak up. It was, oh, it's going to make Flo look bad if he's looking ugly in that kit. Because she has to match. Exactly. So if you don't look good, they're going to get her a crappy little outfit. Exactly.

So it was like, no, no. That's that mama bear. She's like, I've got to protect my kid. The mummerger's coming out. And I'll walk out of a change room. I'm like, can you tell her, mate? Can you tell her she's really relaxing to this day? She's not calling her Chris Jenner.

Taylor Swift is engaged. This, come back to me. She just posted it Oh my God Oh my God Oh my God Oh it's huge The ring is ginormous

Oh my god Oh my God It's on her Instagram It's on her Instagram Oh my God oh my God Oh my God oh my God oh my God Oh my God oh my God oh my God My God oh my God

My God has absolutely captured The sentiment of the world That was a reporter in front of the White House Doing a serious story Then found out that Tailswish is engaged And stopped mid-story Come back to me

I just love the idea That she wasn't on air but obviously her might. Come back to me. Come back to me quick. I need to report on this. Breaking news. Shut that other reporter up. Come back to me.

Huge news this morning. You're going to see this everywhere. Whether you love it or hate it. You're certainly going to hate it, I think, by the next couple of weeks. How can you hate it? It's love, Ducco. Love always wins. You might not be a huge Taylor fan, but love is love.

Yeah. They've got engaged. A lot of speculation. People saying that this is the closest thing America is going to come to a royal wedding. To be fair, yes. I mean, Miga Markle was the actual American who married into the royal family. But when we look at the beloved couple, America's sweetheart, Taylor Swift and Killer Trave, have done a joint post on Instagram.

Collaborated. Who's to say it actually happened yesterday? There's now... Bab's looping us in that this could be weeks old and they've just dropped the photos. Like their photographer obviously needed time to edit. Totally. The beautiful picks. It feels planned.

They did a collaborated post yesterday, which was early hours of us this morning. We all woke up to the new shot. I was trying to do hip thrust. Yeah, yeah, and you were like, oh! I wanted to check how many of these are women to do. Shark I saw the news then did hip thrusts. And then I got out of bed. Yeah, then I got a bit.

Oh, my mom, I'm off to work. They only got together, well, officially, October of 2023. It's been a whirlwind, but all eyes have been on this. Yeah. And it's official. So what we're going to discuss is the ring, right? Because people have come out. Babs initially this morning reported between 30,000 to a million.

And then we, oh, thanks, bye. Crossing life to Babs. Hey, Babs, how much? Hey, you asked me. It's a good way to cut your losses. Like, I'll give you a ballpark. Could be between. To be honest, when she said 30 grand, my initial was like, what a cheapscape.

Yeah, 30 feels, yeah, for him. She's a billionaire. We know that. But he is an NFL superstar on a pretty penny. We've done a deep dive into just his salary, beyond endorsements and how much he would get for the podcast that he runs with his brother. Shy guy, what was the salary you were able to find? So his last deal was $34 million.

That would just be from the Chiefs. That wouldn't be from the endorsement. Exactly, exactly. So $34 million across a two-year contract, I think you said, which is about... April 24th and... You know, $17 million annually. What's the Cardinal rule? You spend three-month salary on an engagement ring.

So when you're earning that much... That's the worst rule ever. It's a crack rule. I don't know who made that crash up. Yeah, Jules did. Well, apparently this rule... ring is 10 carrots. Okay.

That's a lot of carrots. It's a few carrots. I think, I don't even know what, I don't even know what Morgan's is. I don't actually know what mine is. No, I don't actually know what mine is. Obviously, the more carrots, the better. The better. The bigger.

Does carrot mean size? Is that what carrot actually infers? I actually have no idea what carrot means. The four seas of diamond. Carrot, cut, clarity, colour. I think carrot is the bigness. Crossing a babes. Purity of gold.

Oh, okay. It's the diamond we're talking about. I don't know. Somewheres. Of, of... Yeah, but carrot has got to do with... Purity of diamond. In this regard, doesn't it?

I don't know. I honestly don't know much about jewelry. I'm not... That's not my wheelhouse. No, no, Mars is to be believed. 24-carat magic. He's talking about a gold. Oh, never mind.

A unit of weight, not size. There you go. Thank you, Babs. Ah, so it's a heavy ring. 10 carrot. She's not got dainty little guitarist fingers. Hopefully doesn't affect her guitar playing. Anyway, the estimate is between 3.5 to 5 million I'm seeing.

Then I'm seeing a million. I'm saying $150k. So everyone's just guessing. But $5 million would be close to his salary rule. The three-month salary rule, which I don't know the last time a man actually believed that. But when you're someone who has proposed, I go. When you were thinking about, I think I'm going to buy a ring, I think I'm going to propose. Did you have that rule in your head?

No, not all. I just went, what do I think is an acceptable amount to go over for when she inevitably finds out how much it was? What makes me look good, but not too hectic, but not tight-ass? Because I can imagine a lot of blokes would be going, isn't that the rule? I feel like I've heard that rule and then just bend to the societal pressure. So I wonder if Travis went, well, it's public knowledge what I earn. He's probably told her, she's obviously the much wealthier in the coupling. So he's got to stand on his own two feet.

He can afford it. So that three to five million dollar mark, that's probably what he spent. Probably bang on. We don't want to lose that. Yeah, what, have you seen, sorry, just pivoting to another celebrity engagement in recent weeks, Cristiano Ronaldo, proposing to his girlfriend of eight years. That looks like a clown ring. That's ridiculous.

She wouldn't be able to lift her hand up. If you're not seeing the size of this rock, it is genuinely baseball. Like, it is humongous. Who would want to wear that? For a guy who plays soccer, he found a baseball. He really did. God knows how much he spent on that. Five.

Well, that was five. Well, speculation. Of course, it's all speculation. But that is a lot to spend on an eye. So what we wanted to do on 131060, not ring stuff, not engagement stuff. We wanted to do, what did you spend too much on? Yeah. Any item, anything, but you spent too much on it and you know you did.

Because you can imagine Taylor's reading all these reports. Maybe he hasn't been honest. It's not a thing for a bloke to share how much you spend. You don't want to wave that over him or her, but you kind of go, she's going to find out, be like, Jesus. Holy hell. You spent that much money on what? We could have gone to Hawaii. I'd rather a holiday.

What'd you spend too much on? Like, for me, the first thing it comes to mind is I got, like, a Boston Celtics basketball jersey, authentic one that I found online, bought it from a US store. So it was US dollars. And I thought this thing was on a good deal. And I got it for $200 US. $200 US, which is like four? Pretty much 400 Australian. 100%.

On a jersey. It came to Australia. And it comes and it's a kid's jersey. Yeah, what's your point? It didn't even fit. It was like, I couldn't wear it. It was not usable. Be honest, were you like, off it into an extra large kids?

I try. I definitely tried to put it on. It was like coming to my belly button. So, I was about to say, for a $400 garment, I've never seen you wear that. So stupid. So what did you do with it? It's just, I didn't, nothing. I didn't know where it is now.

Could Flo wear it? I've since lost it. It's very much gone. I'm not going to judge you. Yeah. Because you know me, I can be. It's so funny, sometimes I can be real tight-ass and sometimes. I can be very frivolous.

When I first got my full-time job, my first full-time salary, the paycheck hits my account. And I went, well, I've got to treat myself. And I bought $900 legging pants. Jesus. $900. I blew my whole paycheck on leather pants. What kind of pair of pen is $900? $450 per leg.

Great math, right? That's my cap. I can't do any more than that. I got suck it in. $900 leather pants. I got suck it in, but the issue was... Your butt better have looked good and those things. My goodness.

This issue was similar to you, Ducco, I got warped by the sales assistant because she goes, leather will stretch. Yeah. So you've got to get a size down. So I said, okay, I can get those things up. I couldn't get them up to stretch them out. Yeah, yeah. The swamp crotch would be real.

Oh, yeah. And you run hot anyway, so, geez. You can imagine when I took those things off. You were in Shrek, you were literally in Shrek swamp. So bad. Bad. It's got too much on those. 1310.

And then hung on to them for six years thinking, I'll fit into them, I'll fit into them. Try to resell them. No one wanted them. What are these things stink? What are all these stains? 13, 1060. Where'd you spend too much on? What'd you spend too much on?

That core fame prize up for grabs as well, a night stain accommodation plus food. Felt like a good idea at the time, and then you looked back and you went, oopsie. Dats and Ducco. What'd you spend too much on? Yeah, and the huge news this morning,

there's no way you've been able to miss it. Travis Kelsey has proposed. Taylor Swift has said yes. Obviously, she said yes. They collabed on a post. A lot of people commenting like, imagine collaborating on your engagement post with your handle Taylor Swift and your fiancé,

Kill a trap. But a lot of speculation now about the ring. Hey, look, man, what's more subjective than fashion, jewelry choices? Some people saying, not my taste. Other people saying that's the most beautiful ring I've ever seen. What we're drilling down on is the price.

The price tag, because it's speculative. From Babs, from $30,000 to $100,000 to anywhere from $5 million. Exactly. Now, the jeweller that he has collaborated with, an American designer, has rings on the website upwards of $30 grand. I think the cheapest ring they make is $30,000. Okay. If Travis has bought the cheapest ring, hilarious. Hey, man, your love doesn't come down to the rock you give you misso.

Yeah. But if he spent $30 grand and he earns $34 million, there's going to be a question asked. Yeah. But if he spent $5 million, too much. Yeah, it's that sweet spot. Five million also feels ridiculous. What do you spend too much on? Here's the question we're asking.

We go to Bell on 13, 10, 60. Good morning, Bell. Hi, how you going? Pretty good. I mean, we love love, so we're happy with these news. But the question is, what have you spent too much money on? A leather lounge. And it was supposed to be this beautiful Italian leather.

And turns out it was actually like vinyl down the bottom and then some kind of plush leather at the top. So now, like, nine years later, we're still stuck with this big leather lounge with chase that seats like, you know, you could have a party on this thing. But it doesn't even look like the same colour anymore. It's like this horrible grey that we can't get clean. And I hate it. And no one likes it.

No one wants it. I mean, leather already. It's a temperamental fabric. But if you're going to spend the money, you want real leather. Bell, can we ask? How much did you spend on the couch? I think it was about 10 grand. Oh, no, no, no, no.

That's too much for bad leather. For cheap leather. I don't understand who thought putting leather on a couch was a good idea. It's freezing in winter and gets sticky and hot in the summer. The grape of stains, you know, you're not saying that thing. You wipe that thing off. You're right. Ellie, good morning.

Morning. How are you? Yeah, great, thanks, Beth. What did you spend too much money on? When I first got my first job at 15, I saved up all my money to buy a pair of Jordan shoes, so the basketball lot. Yes, yeah, I know him. I didn't realize that it was an American site to start with. So I bought a pair of very expensive shoes, and it turns out they were actually doubled the price.

Oh my God, I'm at 15, there goes all your paycheck. Did you have to go to your mum and dad being like, um, I need more. money. Yeah, Jordan's bankrupt me. Well, it turns out they were like, nope, I don't care. This is your stuff up. You can learn from your steak.

It's good lessons. And they were too big on me, and the material all ripped straight away, so I think they were fake. Oh, Jesus, she got scammed at 15. Oh, no. There's all your bloody Macca's money out and down the window. Please tell me you at least kept them until you fit into them.

I still have them, yeah. Good. And I got them qualified. They are real. It just must have been a dodgy material. It was a dodgy batch. Dodgy batch of Jordans. We'll tweet Michael.

Get it out to him. Hey, should we play Alpha Bucks? We could. You win the $10,000. Hey, you could spend it on whatever you want. You buy a leather couch. One leather couch coming your way. Just make sure you get the fabric protector.

Oh yeah, you need that. Yeah, you need it. 13, 1060, 10K for Alpha Buc. 131060, 10K for Alpha Bucks. I'm excited for leather couch. Yeah, you are. Oh, yeah. How easy you used to wipe down.

So easy to wipe down. I've never actually owned a leather couch. Oh, God. You know how we're staying at my in-laws house? Yeah, they've got leather. It's leather couches, babe. You want to come and have a sit. Yeah.

Wipe it down after the load. I feel like you're going to have its pros. Easy to wipe down. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alpha Bucks on hits. Alfa bugs. Yes, it is that time again. You have 30 seconds to answer.

10 questions, all starting with the same letter. I have to take your first answer. You cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. We'll come back, of course, if there's time, we are planning for 10K. Our player is Jordy. Hello, Jordy. Hi, Ducco, how's it going?

Oh, so good. Hi, Jordy. Hello. Hi, Jeff. Sorry, sorry, I acknowledge you there. We're just bonding. Georgie and I. We've got a podcast.

Absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The chemistry is electric. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jordie, what brings you to Alfa Bucks today? What's motivating you? I want to get a puppy, and my boyfriend won't let me. He says it's too expensive, so this would be the perfect excuse.

Yes. What breed have you got your eye on? I want a cock a spaniel. They're so cute. Georgie, you're not going to believe this. Guess what your letter is. Oh, goodness. Is it a C?

It's C. Oh, yes. I'm feeling lucky. God, that's an omen. This would be great. You get a good dog for 10K. Cocker Spaniels are so sweet. It's one of the only small dogs I actually think are good.

Yeah, I'm not a huge small dog fan. Not particularly yappy, the Cocker Spaniel. At least the ones that I have interacted with. They are cute. It's the ears. They're good for Hocker Walks as well. Amen, I see. Yeah.

Ducker, you know when I went truffle hunting in Florence? Yes, Cocker Spaniel. It was a Cocker Spaniel. They are skilled, intelligent dogs. No, they are. Jordie, let's waste no more time. We want to get you this Cocker Spaniel. Will you let shy guy name it if you win?

That's fun. Or, yeah, you know what, I'll allow it. All right, all right. Jordy, here we go. Your time will start after the first question. Come on. Starting with the letter C, we need you to name. A country.

Canada. A drink. Um, pass. A reality TV show. Um, pass. A shoe brand. Mel. An adjective.

Palm. An actress. Kay Blanchett. A mathematical term. Calculus. A musical. Cinderella. A video game.

Call duty. A five-letter word. Calm. A drink. Oh, Coke. Oh! We came home strong. We started off with two early easier passes and I was like, oh-oh.

I think Coat. Why didn't they say coach? I don't know what I, Jody. Or coffee, Judy. Oh, my God. You could have said camomal tea. If you got that, it was after the buzzer. That would have given it.

you nine, everything else you answered you did get, what would you have said for a reality TV show? Can you think of one? No, I still can't. Celebrity Apprentice. Oh, yeah. Kepos, catfish. There is a couple.

There's a tougher one. Cheaters. Remember cheetahs? That was a great show. Damn it, Jordy. We were too away from getting that dog. Well, did you think of names, shy guy, whilst, because I thought she had that.

I did cheat. I just got some names. Chat GPT. I did you. What would you have named, Jordy's Spaniel. Spaniel Jackson. Spaniel Jackson. Oh, yeah.

That's all right. That's right. Come here, Spaniel Jackson. I'll save it for the next. I'll save it for the real dog. Yeah, except for the real dog. Spaniel Day Lewis. There you go.

That was also on the list. Famous Daniels. $100 to spend online at Woolie's coming your way. Do you already no dog, but you do get, you can buy some dog foods? Spaniel Ricardo. All right, yeah, I'll stop up. You just go for Daniel. I can't even know.

All the Daniels are gone. Yeah. Daniel. No, I've got nothing now. Yeah, I got Ricardo, Day Lewis and Radcliffe. There's no less. That's the big Daniel. All right. Well done, Judy. Thanks for coming on.

Thanks, guys. See you. Bye, Jordy. Hey, we are speaking dogs next. Oh, well, what a great segue from Jordy. I know. We want to know all you crazy dog lovers out there. Oh. What do you let your dog do?

Yeah. What do you let him get away with? What are you doing? Too much. Because one chick from Julie Shaw, poor. She's done something. Jess and Ducko. How much do you love your dog? Yeah.

It's not gross. It's not crossing boundaries. It's just you love your puppy dog. Yeah. Vicki Patterson. Maybe a name you're familiar with if you are in the reality TV space. We all remember Jersey Shore, that iteration from America followed those bunch of very tanned fit people.

Well, the British response, Jordy Shore. Jolie Patterson was one of the stars. Obviously, has now gone on to quite celebrity and fame. Here's a little super cut to give you an idea of Vicky's vibe. What this kid needed was a boob job. Vicki Patterson, human boob job. She's vicious. It's cally tight on me fanny.

Oh, yeah. Hello. I just got me lady section on a boat. I actually don't know my left from my right and can't drive. I can't be lady section on a boat. I can't tell my left from my right and I can't drive. I've never felt more connected to a celebrity than I do with Vicki Patterson. The reason we're talking about her, she's gone viral.

She's 37 and she's doing a collaboration with a dog food brand, all right? And they're promoting a new series she's going to do. She's got two chocolate labs, Ducko. Yeah. She loves these Labrador's Max and Milo. Everyone loves their dog. Everyone loves their dogs. Everyone thinks their dog's the most beautiful dog on the planet.

Vicky maybe lets Max or Milo, we can't tell which is which because they're both chocolate labs. Maybe let's Max or Milo get away with a bit more than the average person. In this promo video for this new series she's doing, she's there sitting on a table The dog's right up in her grill. She opens her mouth to accept a big old kiss, a big old lick from her chocolate lab. This is how it played out.

You are gummy. I know. I'm so sorry. I do that too. And let you know it makes them happy. It makes them happy. When you see a dog lick their butthole and then they lick you in the face or on the face or in the mouth, I mean, come on.

It's one thing to be licked on the cheek. Yeah. It's another to open your mouth. and willingly receive that. That's her co-host there saying, you're Gammy, which I'm assuming translates to disgusting. But then goes on to admits it, admit it as well, that she does it too.

You don't let Gianni lick your face? I don't let Pam look mine. Not my face. I do. Because my thing is, the Rhodesian Ridgeback has a naturally furrowed brow. So I always think Gianni is a little bit sad. And obviously that's putting human emotion on him. So when he's happy to see me after I come home.

And he's a bit friendly, greeting, licking. I let him, because I'm like, yes, this is some emotion. You're so sad. You're so sad. Let's have a cuddle. Let's have a lick. Not in my mouth, though. Yeah, the mouth is rank.

It's disgusting. And it's so funny because now Luchia is very much into Gianni, gets up in his girl. He licks her face. And I'm sort of like, I don't think her immune system is built up enough to handle this. Yeah, yeah. But the question is, what do you let your dog do? I mean, your dog's under the covers.

Yeah, well, my dog sleeps under the duna. Is she got her own pillow? No. Or she just ends up taking yours yet. See, there was a period that she was sleeping in the middle of Morgan Lai under the duna on a pillow separately. Oh, I mean. But now she's got her own, she definitely goes under the duna. She likes that. We've given her her own duna so it can be on top of our duna so she doesn't come under the covers anymore. Oh, that's fantastic.

Because the sheets were just getting too dirty. Was there an element as well once you had a kid in the house? You were like, we've got to draw some boundaries here because Flo's in her own room. Yeah. Pam's on hers. Pam looks like the superior being. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, we've kept Pam in the bed.

We got Flo out of the room real quick. We kept paying him in our bed. Just so Florence knows the hierarchy in the house. Yeah, this is ours. Yeah, we definitely, yeah, she's got her own duna. Yeah. You know, she takes a good spot on the couch. She has an organic diet.

Oh, that's right. You cook all her own meal, her meals and this and that. She's got, I've had to, you know, I've had to get plenty of urine samples. What do you let your dog do? Yeah. What do you, yeah, well, 131060, that's what we want to ask right now. Got that great call of fame. Yeah.

Do you let them lick the inside of your mouth? That's the level. We're working here with Vicki Patterson. The weirder, the better. Absolutely. And we're not going to judge. No. We're dog people as well.

We love dogs. Jess and Ducko. What do you let your dog do? Yeah, reality stand. Vicki Patterson? Vicky. You'll know her from Jordy Shore. Maybe you're one of her 5.5 million followers on Instagram.

And you saw this video of her doing some promotion with her beautiful Labradoros. I think it's Milo. Classic Labrador name. Choc Labrador. Milo. Milo. She's a creative lady. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She obviously loves this dog, and the dog loves her, lick in her face, but at one point in this video, she opens her mouth to receive the dog's snout and mouth and tongue. Tongue lick. Inside her mouth. She's tongue punching with her dog. She loves this dog. And she was like, oh, God, I know it's gross, but I love him.

And it makes him happy. She just put it back on the dog. Yeah. The comments are ferocious. I love my dogs like my kids, but no, I could not. I love my dogs more than anything, but after seeing them licking their bits, I would not let them lick my face. Or like when they eat, they vomit, then they eat their vomit.

Oh, Jesus Christ. That is foul. I don't understand how people let their dogs lick their face. That tongue has been to some horrible places. It's been to places, yeah, yeah. So we want to know, non-judgment. No, no, no, judgment free. What do you let your dog do?

It's a dog show. We're a dog-friendly show. We are a dog. Don't you be bringing your cat here? We're not the show for cats, unfortunately. It's funny babes when we were workshoping this topic. She said, should we make it pets? And we said, no.

We don't want to hear what you let your cat do. I would take a lizard, though. What are you let your lizard do? Axolotles, if you got them. We've got fish. We do have fish. How much can you let your fish do, though? Well, Babs siphons our fish wooler out with her mouth just to clean the tank.

That's how far she goes. She's essentially doing exactly what Vicky did with the dogs. She's kissing her own fish. Do you fish have tongues? Can you french a fish? Google it. Babs. Babs, what's your...

Can we cross life to Babbs? Babs, can you french a fish? Yes They have time Oh yeah I got yes too Oh well done Actually no that's talking about French cooking techniques

Sorry I thought the paws I thought her paws was her scooping up her catfish And trying to tongue it No I used to stick my fingers in the tank at home And let them suck my fingers Babe I reckon you'd like a toe suck then If you like that

Don't don't even try and tell me You're not the next step away from toe. You're in the realm of toes. Because it used to be a thing, you'd bring your friends over and be like, stick your finger in there, it's funny, and then it would come and suck on your finger, and then you'd run away. Let my fish suck your finger. Then you'd run away.

Ah, there's strange girls just let her a fish suck my finger. All right, I'm going to broaden this out. I still don't want to hear about cats. Nah. What do you let your dog or your fish do? Ash, on 13, 1060. What do you let your dog wee on the toilet? What?

This is a Bruce Almighty. Impressive. Did you obviously train it to do that, Ash? No, not really. We're trying to train it to Wii on a Wii mat as a puppy. And I think he's just seen us weeing in the toilet. So he's just decided now he goes in and he cocks his leg and not we've in the toilet, but just weaves on the side. Sorry, here I am.

He's aiming into the bowl. Oh, that's so cute. I'm pretty sure he won't ever get to that. But I'm not mad about it. I think it's not a bad place for him to be weeing. Better there than the carpet. Absolutely. Not enough, if he's gone to a midnight weed, then you've gone at 2 a.m.

The other toilet, and you've slipped over in his wing. Slippery doodah? Yeah. Yeah. I haven't happened yet. That's actually amazing. That's hilarious. The copy cat.

He sees you. Yeah, monkey see monkey do. Doggy see donkey do. Leslie, what do you let your dog or fish do? Hey, good morning. Good morning, Leslie. Oh, well, I let my dogs drink out of my tea and coffee cups. I don't care.

Even if I'm halfway through my coffee or tea, it's luke warm for them. Leslie, what sort of coffee is your dog ordering? Is he a cappuccino guy? Well, no, we're definitely a latte. Latte. So you could be halfway through your latte, and then you let Spike just come in and lick it. Absolutely.

And then you drink it after the dog drinks it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Leslie, do you notice the caffeine impacting the energy levels of the dog? Like, does it affect them the same way it affects us? I don't think it does, actually, no. But they do prefer tea, if I'm going to be honest. Just the English breakfast? First?

Yorkshire, my apologies. Yorkshire, obviously. Yeah. There's fine. Has the dog ever turned around being like, more sugar, mummy? Like, it's not sweet enough. I don't like this. It's sugar, but the best thing is of all of it is when I have people around and they're having a coffee or a tea, when they put the cook down, they've got the dregs left in it.

The dogs will just sit there and bark at them and bark at them and back at them. They're not real. But they want their coffee or tea. Yes, hand it over. That's so funny. Are you finished? I wanted it. Oh, I love that.

Thank you, Leslie. Courtney, something your grandfather did. So my grandfather used to sit there, well, he still loves, so he still does it. But he used to sit there with his feet out. And the dog used to lick his feet and just sit there and lick it and lick it and lick it. And then we would try and get it to stop. But he would be like, no, it's okay, it's okay. But I just thought of something else that I was.

reminded about that my mother-in-law is not in the country so she won't know I'm talking about her but my mother-in-law we would sit and have ice cream or whatever it is a dessert with her puppies and um she would let the dog lick the spoon and then she would put the spoon back into her mouth and keep going and then eat and then carry on eating and then I was like really Yeah, yeah. This is who I'm marrying into, this family. Which do you think is weirder, Courtney? Pop letting the dog suck his toes or mother-in-law sharing the tiramisu with the chihuahua? Well, my grandfather really enjoyed it as well, but I don't know.

Pop's there like, give me a moment. Can relate. Do not forget hits five-star fly away. Your chance to experience a five-star getaway to see the world's biggest artist's live. We're talking Ed Sheeran in New Zealand before he hits Australia on his loop tour. January next year. This is unbelievable. To get in the boarding lounge, you've got to be listening for Ed Shear and

after nine. Yep. People are already waiting there. Yeah. Because they've been listening and calling. So people are already in the lounge. Well, absolutely. Started Monday.

Yeah, it'd be a long stay in that lounge though. Well, lucky the buffet. They just keep replenishing. Oh, it's like the Qantas lounge. Absolutely. Goodness me. The hit boarding lounge. Is it.

Even better than Qantas. It is a step above. Uh-huh. It's glorious. Someone will make your Bloody Mary for you. You don't have to put it all together. He finishes at 9 with us and he goes and works in the hit boarding lounge. Oh, he does like Tom Cruise cocktail style, he's doing tricks and flips

He can do anything He always looks so excited of doing it Absolutely Don't you show I go Yep, I've got a lot to do now that we've launched this one What's your speciality? If someone goes, you pick bartender What are you making?

What's your cocktail of choice? Cosmo Cosmopolitan, hey? You sexy boy I'm not a drink up. All right, okay, big Cosmo Someone's been watching and just like that Yeah, sex in the city much?

A couple of Cosmos with a boy It's the only one I could think. Okay. Of all the cocky teas, I was not expecting him to say that. Five-star luxury accommodation as well in Auckland, yet your private driver to the gig. It's everything. So pit boarding lounge, be listening for Ed after nine.

That's right. But up next, Ducco, I have, it's a quiz with zero stakes. Yeah. I'm going to give you scenario that all my conversations now that I've got a kid have in common. I want to see if you can pick the thread. All right. Jess and Ducko. Dougo, I wanted to give you a little challenge now.

Stakes couldn't be lower. But there's a... No, no, no. The stakes are high always. A challenge accepted. I don't know if you're in the headspace as a parent to guess this correctly. You'll get there, don't worry. All right.

But there's something I've noticed in every conversation I'm having with other parents, particularly friends who know I've got a little girl who maybe we haven't seen each other in a little bit it is a natural way to start a conversation now with people I'm friends with who also have kids they'll ask me how are you how's Lucia so I've got genuinely five things I've responded with

when people have asked that question but every time with different people the response back has been the same I want to see if you can capture the thread so can you you'll be be my parent friend. You're going. Hey, Jess, how's Lucia? Okay. Hey, Jess. How's Lucia going? Oh, she's been a little unsettled lately. Oh. So another friend. This is someone completely different who hasn't heard this conversation. Give me the line again. Yeah. Hey, how's Lucia going? Oh, Ducko. She didn't

sleep well last night. Give me another one. How's Lucia going? Oh, Ducko. She woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. One more time. How's Lucia going? Oh, Ducko. She's been a bit funny with her food lately. She's not eating heaps. So different scenarios, different people. So that's the answers you gave to different people. Each one of my friends in recent weeks, Ducko, has come back with the same line. Now, I know your daughter's only four months. Yeah, yeah.

So not settled, not sleeping, not eating well. What did they all identify and question me if it was the problem? What could have been? I'm trying to think. The food? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's in that realm. Yeah, okay.

Is she eating too close to bed or is she eating too close to bed? or is she eating not enough, not the right food? You're flirting with it. They all came back with... Eating too much pasta? They all came back with, oh, was she constipated? Oh, yeah, okay.

That's like the one-trick fix. Oh, constipated, is it? Because when we got back from Italy, the first time I saw someone, oh, how did Lichiko overseas? I said, oh, to be honest, she wasn't great. First comment, oh, could she have been constipated maybe from planes from?

That's funny. saw someone, how's Lucia? Oh, man, she's not sleeping well. Could she be constipated? They always, like, even floor people go, oh, stomach pains. Oh, she have tummy pains. Oh, she vomited. She has tummy pain. You're like, no, I don't think so. And we're, we're big advocates on this show. We know. Gut health is paramount. It's the second brain. We've got babs. But you, we've got you. But every conversation I'm having now, because I want to be honest, it's not all hunky-dory, let alone what you think on social media. So I'm honest with my friends, but they all bring it back to you, as she constipated. Do you then start to get annoyed? Like, no, she's not. She's

not constipated. I have been seeing them. Well, it's funny because we went to the doctor a little while ago and they went, ah, could be getting into suppository territory. Oh, so she is constipated? Well, but isn't that normal for a kid? Yeah. Isn't it famously you who's never been constipated? Never in my life, Ducco?

Even as a child? You have to ask your parents, I guess. I'll text my mum. I'll text my mum. I asked you remember how I was conceived. Now I'm going to text her. It was like constipated as a child. You was learning. Maybe it's my ego getting in the way, Duccoe. I don't want to admit because I I'm so proud of my free-flowing boughs. I don't want to admit my daughter.

I'm the leading expert in suppositories. Okay. So, you know, I can give you tips and tricks. Do you reckon she's constipated? Jess and Duckow. Just about done here, team. A couple people ring, ring, ringing, Ducco. Oh, yeah.

Hits five-star flyway to see Ed in New Zealand, Ed in NZ. Oh, that's what we should have said. Yeah, that's nice, isn't it? Yeah, it's better. That's after nine. Yep. We're just the messengers.

When the messages. It's not happy yet. We don't have access to the boarding lounge, unfortunately. Shaga doesn't let us in. He works there, making his cosmos. La, la, la, la. And then we don't have access. No, we don't have access.

He's the gaykeeper, and he has said, after night. After nine. We're just here to tell you about the flights, luxury accommodation, the driver to the gig, and of course, the tickets to see Ed. Jeez, it'd be good. So stick with us. Congratulations again to Taylor and Travis, guys. She's big day on the show.

She manifested that love story in 2008, okay. You can all point it back to there, love story to the OG. We will keep you abreast when we finally get an actual dollar value of the ring because Sweet Babs, our resident Swifty, has speculated anywhere between $30,000 and $5 million. Could be anything. It's a huge, it's a broad range. We will whittle it down before the big day.

Surely it'll come out eventually. I think so. Because the jeweller, the jewel is going to come out and go, we were the jeweller. We did it. Do you want Taylor's Ring or do you want a knockoff of Taylor's Ring? There you go. Something like that. Taylor's Ring.

We'll also keep you updated on pitching for celebrant, and Ducko is pitching for MC. We're going to get the show on the road. We're absolutely going to tell. Where would they get married? Because she's from, what, Nashville, and where's he from originally? Cleveland. Like, will they do it in one of their hometowns?

Will it be a destination wedding? I don't know. Who's to say? It could be destination. I feel like we'll be there. I think so. I think we'll be the only radio show who guns for it. Don't you reckon shy guy?

No one else will be doing. We'll have the official rights. We'll just be outside. the car park of the venue they're getting married at? Sometimes I think if I was as big of a celebrity as Taylor Swift, I just throw little small potato radio shows a bone. I tell my PR team, hey, find someone. Find a random show anywhere in the world.

I'll do an exclusive interview with them. Just why not? Like, why not? For free, I'll just go for it. We could, that could happen one day. Just shy guy gets an email. Hey, Taylor wants to tell you. Jess and ducko's been picked.

God, but do you know what will happen? Someone will get wind and they'll, steal. Yeah. The network could be like, oh no, we'll give that to someone else. Oh,

you reckon our own network would be like, oh, Kerry and Tommy should happen. To me before. Not with this show, but similar as happened. Oh, no. I get a guest.

I'm like, great, we've got this guest. They'll go, no, I worked for this. Yeah. Oh, no. It's not how it should work. We need to keep it on the DL.

DL. Stick with us. You never know. It could happen. It really could happen. We are big fans. You love folklore. Oh, huge folklore guy.

And we got Babs as well. Babs is a huge fan. Babs is the reason she's a billionaire. She's spent so much money on streaming, on the concerts. Yeah, yeah, yeah, loves it. It went a couple of times. So what I'm hearing is Taylor owes us. A chat.

Let us come. Let us go there. Let us do it. Hey, we're back tomorrow, though. Big Thursday show, as always. Is the Year of the song back tomorrow? Yes. I believe it is.

No, it's a wordioki week. Did we do it last week? Oh, no, no, we don't hear it. We did. We did wordioki. Oh, well, Dukkah, it's up to you. Do you want to play Wurdyoki? I'm easy.

So you guys played a year of the song last week? Ah, how did we go? How was it? That'd a bit a weird addition. It was. He ended up doing the DJ one. Oh. Highest earning DJs. And I just got hung up on how much they'd earned. Yeah, a bit of money. But you know what, surprisingly, because I thought DJs were my area of expertise.

Old music guru Babs out of them. Oh, she floged me. I didn't play on my own. I thought maybe you and Shago played or like that. Yeah, Bats was amazing. There you go. It's a wordyoke week. So, yeah.

Fantastic. See, I've written last week off when you weren't here. Yeah, I've completely forgotten. Yeah, forgot what happened. Yeah. Ah, geez, it was just this time last week. I didn't come back here. Cool little week on Wednesday.

How are you feeling right now? Feeling good. Oh, actually. There's so much going around. Yeah, the black line. Plus, of course, Call of Fame. We have Alfa Bucks. It's another big day, but we will.

See you tomorrow. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Say, nada. I used to stick my fingers in the tank at home and let them suck my fingers. And lick it and lick it and lick it. Jess and Docro. That was the Jess and Ducko podcast.

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