Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | Then share some ya dog

Episode Date: February 10, 2025

Jess regreted forcing Angus to get her a treat, what are you still fighting over and the pregnancy hormones got to Ducko's wife Morgan!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Macca's new McSmart Meal is here. Get a cheeseburger, small fries and soft drink, plus your choice of a side for just $6.95. T's and C's apply. Jess and Duggo! This is the Jess and Duggo Podcast. Hello everyone and welcome to the podcast. You might be able to hear some... There's a bit going on. Some faint bell ringing. Yep.

Some faint squawking. Yep. Some faint things being thrown. That is because a 15-month-old baby has commandeered the studio. Yep. Daddy needed to go to work early, which meant the child has been dropped off. And Babs is doing a horrible job of taking care of it. Babs is over there.

She's plucking multiple pens out of her mouth. That's all you can really do. Yeah. I know how busy babies are, but until you're with one all the time. Truly. And it's one of those things because I've completely forgotten. You've got a newborn, obviously imminent. But you forget what a potato they are.

Because when they're like this, whoa, scissors. We had scissors. You're going to be on patrol here. When they're like this, you forget. I saw a great meme the other day. You're going to be on patrol here. When they're like this, you forget. You forget. I saw a great meme the other day. The biggest thing of parenting that you never consider is how often you have to get back up after you've just sat down. Because I'll go, oh, we're all good.

Oh, hang on. She's grabbed something. Oh, hang on. She's trying to stick a fork in her power point. The bell's in the mouth. Oh, bell is in the mouth. Yes, I can see. It's a busy age. Oh, we've dropped the mouth. Yes, I can see. It's a busy age. Oh, we dropped the bell.

And it's funny. We were talking today, Ducko, about you trying to plan a trip. Yeah, yeah. And your daughter will be... Like a couple of months old. A couple of months old. Which, from the internet's perspective, everything I keep seeing, great age to travel. Yeah.

Because they're blobs, maybe they're on the boob. Yes, yes. Or they're easily satisfied. And they sleep a lot. Yeah. We're also planning a trip around the same time. That's going to be tough. Everything the internet's telling me, 18 months, worst.

Worst, yeah. Also, if you're going to Europe, it's a long flight to get over. It's a long-ass flight, and she's not really in the screen or iPad phase. She doesn't seem... What are you going to... I have no idea. Are you going to put yourself here? We're going to have to do shifts.

We're going to have to do three-hour to six-hour shifts, and it's like the other person gets to rest and recharge and watch a movie, and the other person has to walk up and down the aisles. But even when you're actually over there. Oh, yeah. But see, you know I'm biased, and I love Italy and Italian culture and all that. Everything I hear about the way even cities are set up, they're so family-focused. Yeah. Piazzas and the big wide spaces are set up, they're so family focused.

Piazzas and the big wide spaces, it's because they want to see free range children. Kids running around. Just let her go. Take her to Italy and let her run. That seems to be the vibe I'm picking up. Unless I'm on some weird- And because she looks so Italian,

you won't even recognize her over there. You're like, where is she? I'll just be looking over and she's joined another family in spaghetti bolognese. It's like, all right, sis. She's embraced the culture. You do you. You do you.

Yeah. I told you I wanted to originally give her the middle name Lasagna. Yeah. So when we did travel to Italy, we would get some sort of royalty status because it would be seen as like, oh, this is unbelievable. We've gone with Margarita instead. I still think we're going to get special treatment. I think so.

I'm just going to flash her passport everywhere. Yeah, you should. And just see what we get. We have to get our unborn child the passport to go to New Zealand. I'm like, oh my God. So the minute she pops out, you have to start the passport application. Ridiculous. I'm like, so seriously, she need a passport?

Are that hilarious? So stupid. Because she's literally going to be a week old. You probably have to start it. Yeah, genuinely. And she'll look different in those four months. Do you have to take her to the post office to do that? Hold her up in front of the white background?

I don't know. Or can you just get the photo at home? But you've got to meet their parameters, which is always hard. Exactly. The lighting. How much shoulders. I'll take her to the post office. We'll get her dressed up.

I love that. You know? You remember what a saga it was for me getting her Lucia's passport? How old was she then? Ooh. So we were going to New Zealand as well. She must have been eight months. Okay.

Maybe a bit younger. Maybe seven when we tried to do New Zealand as well. She must have been eight months. Okay. Maybe a bit younger. Maybe seven when we tried to do the passport. Yeah. And I chose the wrong outfit. So don't make the same mistake I did. Okay. Don't do overalls. I just want to hold her up like a little baby burrito.

Yeah. But I wonder, like, she won't have neck control. I've seen this at the, you know what they do? I saw this at the post office a little while ago. Because I was about to say, you'll be able to see your hand holding her neck up. Yeah, I would have thought that. They lay him on the ground. They pulled the white cardboard, whatever that was, paper, onto the ground and lay the kid there.

And took the photo like a flat lay. Yeah, right. To try and get them. That would be so weird. So funny. It just feels dumb. Like if they're younger than two. They're not going to attack another nation.

Yeah. What does the embassy need to know? And they're still going through the metal detectors and everything like that. That is the best part though, because you get through special lane. Special lane. Like even we did, we did, where, oh, even when I was pregnant, I got to go through special lanes. Yeah. Which makes me freak out.

I'm like, what's going on through that scanner that you can't walk through normally? So I get put through a different one. Oh, you get put through a separate one. Yes. Interesting. So with the kid, make sure you're always holding the kid through security. You get to go through this fast route. Next Friday, we're flying back to Queensland for a wedding, for our friend's wedding.

And Morgan has to get a letter from her obs to say she's allowed to fly in case the airlines say no. Yes. I'm sure they won't. Because you know, that's the thing. We did the same thing. I think I was seven months pregnant. And we said to the obstetrician, oh, we've been told by the flight attendant, the travel agent, we need a letter.

And the obstetrician said, yeah, it's not our problem. It's the airlines. Yeah. They are the ones who don't want to take responsibility. And fair enough. In case your water breaks on air. So you need to get a letter to say you're all good health-wise, yada, yada. But they have cut-offs.

Like, I think 33 for some airlines, 36 for others. And she's going to be close to 33. Like, she'll be, will be 31, 32. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because Morgan's like a bigger, like, frame, I reckon. She doesn't look as maybe, say, someone who's, like, small. And it is funny, the difference.

I know we had a friend come in the other day who's a week behind Morgan. And she's like a head smaller than me. Yes. And she looks double Morgan size, but it's funny how differently you carry. The bodies take it. Yes. Yes. Also, she was in the top 90% of child size.

Mine's in the bottom 20. I once was flying while I was pregnant and had paid extra for the emergency row. I wanted extra leg room. And I got booted out of there. They wouldn't let me sit there. Really? In case something did go wrong. In case of emergency.

They didn't think I could execute. I was like, so rude. But do they know, even if you were pregnant, you wouldn't help. You wouldn't be doing it. If there was an emergency, you would sit there and you'd put your headphones on. You'd be doing a prayer. You'd be touching your rosary beads. No, I play Whirly Word.

Whirly Word? What is that? It's an app and it's a wheel with letters and you make words. I'll show you Whirly Word. Anyway, that's what I'd be doing. You'd be like, pretend it didn't happen. Oh, I didn't see this. Jess, the plane door's open. Come on, go.

I didn't notice. So yeah, don't buy, don't bother spending the extra $35, whatever it is. Good to know. Yeah, good to know. Yeah, good to know. This is whirly word. Well, it looks fun. How to play.

That's what I do on it. Oh, sorry. Yeah, with the wheel. You make letters. You make words out of the letters. Oh, man. That and Bananagram. You are really killing it. Real hoot.

You're a fun person. Jess and Taco in the morning. Welcome to a Tuesday team. Good morning, indeed. Good morning, everybody. It is a pleasure to be here. Absolute pleasure. How are you feeling today, brother? You know, tough game yesterday, team.

But hey, hell of a day. Big day. Horrible game to watch. Bad if you're a Chiefs fan. Good fun to be at a pub drinking beers on a Monday, though. You don't often hear, now correct me if I'm wrong, I don't quite have my finger on the pulse of the NFL. I don't often hear about Super Bowls being a complete blowout.

They're not usually that bad. Like AFL Grand Finals I've heard being a blowout. They can get bad. You still kind of go, how? You're the top two teams. How have you dropped the ball? It's a shame when it does get a blowout because then even the people who don't can get bad. You still kind of go, how? You're the top two teams. How have you dropped the ball? It's a shame when it does get a blowout because then even the people who don't care for either team are not interested in the game.

Absolutely. I think yesterday that led to more drinking for the majority of the people that were there. Well, I mean, if you're not on the edge of your seat constantly getting up and down, cheering, commiserating, all you can do is keep going up to the bar and ordering drinks. And keep drinking those $7 scooters. How much bud do you reckon you put away? Oh, they ran out. They ran about.

Also, chicken wings. Someone, get this, because there was dollar wings until the first points. Yes. A guy went up and ordered 100 wings. Now, pardon moi, was he with a large group? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. He was with a group of maybe 15.

But in one go, the kitchen went. There was so many wings. It was ridiculous. That is so many wings. I had like, I reckon I'd had nine wings before 11am. Oh, I love that. That, your body must be going, whoa, whoa. Whoa.

What time zone are we in? Yeah, yeah. What time zone are we in? It was a bit like that. It's like being at the airport. Yeah. Where calories and money don't count. Doesn't count.

I'm like, I'll have a beer and a pack and a crinkle cut salt and vins at 9.30am. It was very much like that. Yeah, right. It was a fun day. You know, lost the battle, won the war. I love that. I had a good time. I love that for sports fans.

Yeah. It's becoming such a big thing here. Huge, yes. There was like 140 people at the pub I was at yesterday. It is funny, though. I got into a bit of a TikTok scroll at like 7.30 after dinner. I didn't see anything about the score. All my feed was about Kendrick Lamar.

Did you watch it? I watched the bits that TikTok was serving up to me, so not in its entirety. I didn't think I was a huge Kendrick fan. I'm not, let's get me on the record, I'm not on the Drake bandwagon. But I just don't love

rap and hip-hop. It looked like he put on a hell of a show. And now that I'm reading and learning more about the pettiness and the dissing, bringing out Serena Williams, I went, oh, that's a bit of fun. What she got to do with the price of fish. Why is she dancing on the stage? She's bloody Drake's ex-girlfriend.

I would not know they dated. The plot thickens. The amount he goes to to shit can Drake in songs. Yes. Or just to get back at it. It's quite funny. You know, he's also a very short king. He's like 5'5".

And I have a feeling, Ducko, everyone on that stage would not have been over 5'6". Everyone looked of a similar height. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's quite little. And he had flare jeans on, which weren't a hit. To be fair, Serena is tall, but she was like not right next to him. Yeah, yeah, really far away. He was on a step. She was doing that sick dance

off to the side. And I hope he doesn't bring the flare jeans back. Babs is in here going, yes, I love them. And she's of the age who would never have seen the flare. Oh, you probably don't know what they are. So she thinks this is the first time. Is that the person you've seen them? No, I've seen them before. Oh, okay.

I just thought he was rocking them. They looked cool. Okay. It's hard for a shorter person to rock the flares, I reckon. There's not a lot of leg. Can you imagine if I rolled in in flares? It'd be a statement. It would be a statement.

With my moustache, anything's possible. Anything's possible. You've granted a new identity for 2025. That's right. He's about to become a dad. He's got the mo and now a bootleg jean. Yes. A sled jean.

Next year, people are like, are you going to bring your baby to the soup hole next year? I'm like, yeah, why not? Strap her to the chest. She'll be right. Put the little headphones on. She'll be fine. She'll be fine.

So if you're looking for a gift idea, a baby chief's onesie perhaps for the little lady. That'd be cool. That would be good. That'd be very cool. But hey, we've still got a big show for you today. Don't let my beers yesterday stop us from having fun. No, no. You're bright out of bushy tail.

I'm here. I'm doing my job. You're ready to rip in. How are you going today? Good. All right. You were much dustier after the origin. So you're fine today.

But that was at the night. That's the night. That's because it ended. It was the same. It's because it ended at 10.30 or 10. You're so right. So I was sleep deprived, depressed. You got all your drinking done in the day.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. How good's a day session? It's so much better. I wasn't even hungover after the hour. I think I was just actually completely deprived of everything. I was depraved. But everything. I was depleted. But a day session, way better. Yes, but we've got a great show.

And we're here firing on all cylinders. 10K Alphabucks, your chance of that. 6.30 and today. Oh, we have Alphabucks Couples Edition at 8 o'clock, which will be fun as always. That's right. We had our first couple yesterday, Sky and Caleb. And look, they got six or seven. You know, can our couple today do better?

It was never going to work with Sky. Two. She had a strategy. Didn't she? And she stuck with it. What else we got? We got Year of the Song on the show today. Our Call of Fame column in O tickets.

Plus, we'll get you cash to get you there. Oh, my God. You just get involved in the show any chance. You don't need to wait for that opportunity. You never need an invite. If you hear something, you go, I have my two cents to add. 13, 10, 60. Up next, something, you go, I have my two cents to add. $13.10. $13.60.

Up next, though, we're talking text message etiquette. The worst text one can send to you has been revealed. I have an emoji question as well. Oh, okay. So I'd like to remember what we're doing. One blanket. One blanket. Jess and Ducko.

Jess and Ducko. All right. Now we're talking text messages. And this has just been an online poll, really. But, jeez, the internet. They're saying everything. Don't they just? Don't they just?

They've come out with what they believe is the worst word one can text to you. Oh, I reckon my dad's guilty of a few of these. Just no heart, no soul. Too blunt. Too blunt. Now, this isn't an emoji, I will say. It's not just a thumbs up emoji which you get from a dad or two. Yeah, we don't love those. Yeah, they're meant to be pretty passive. The, this isn't an emoji, I will say. It's not just a thumbs-up emoji, which you get from a dad or two. Yeah, we don't love those.

Yeah, they're meant to be pretty passive. The younger generation don't like this. But maybe, Babs, you can see if you agree with this. The word that is the most passive, they believe, that doesn't conjure up anything for anyone, it's dispiriting. The person who would text this would be apologising for violence, but also trying to appear easy and breezy kind of vibe. Yep, sure.

And it's the simple word, sure. Okay. You know what I thought you were going to say? Okay. Okay. Which is the same vibe, isn't it? You're getting bupkis. That's what it is.

You're getting nothing. And they're saying the younger generation, they say that they want a bit more energy and a bit more sass and Shaw just doesn't cut it for you. Makes me sad when Jethro messaged me Shaw. Oh, hang on. They're doing it to each other. See, here I'm thinking it's boomers doing it to the youngies.

Is it like, can you get me something? Can you get milk from the grocer on the way home? Shaw, is that rude? It kind of sounds passive aggressive in my head. All the time? Yeah. Like if you say, do you want to hang out today? Shaw. Like, okay,, do you want to hang out today? Sure.

Like, okay, I want more than that. Sure does feel like I'm doing it against my will. Sure, if you want to. Sure, why not? Yeah, even with the milk, it's a very simple request. They're on their way home. Maybe they've even asked, do you want me to get anything? You feedback, we need more milk.

Sure feels like I'm doing it because you told me to. It does feel a little bit that way. Sure. That's what they're saying. It's synonymous obviously with yes and shouldn't be associated, but should be associated with sarcasm and attitude. It's that classic thing. It's the same as work emails.

Boss Jase, he puts no flattery, no frilly language, and it always feels angry. I'm like, thanks in advance. Well, I never said I was doing it. Yes. Even he doesn't hit us with a high team. It's just team. Team, comma, goes into the email.

Yours in broadcasting, Jason. We need more frill. Because even though there's not meant to be tone associated, there's tone. And it's all passive aggressive. You know who on this team loves a sure text? The shy man. Yep. He's been sitting there.

I've probably sent heaps. You do. You like a sure. You like a fine. We know we have issues with fine. You like an okay. I like the okay, A-Y, not the two letters. Do you think that is less passive aggressive?

It's like you've spent more time writing it out. It just sounds more friendly. Okay. Okay, I hate K. K is bad. K, K. What do you think is the worst text you can get from someone? Word or emoji?

To be honest, yeah, emojis do it for me because I just don't understand them. Do you know what people are hitting me with a lot? And this is what I wanted to ask you, Ducko. It's the head that's melting. Oh, I always send that one. What? The sideways melt fight. Because it can be so many things.

That's my issue. I've had it responded to me a few times. Yeah. What is it meant to imply? It can be like, let's pretend that we've got to stay late today. Let's pretend you and me have to stay late today at 3pm this afternoon. Let's say our boss is making us do something. We've got to stay till 3pm, right?

In this fantasy land. Yeah. And I'd go, oh, I can't wait for tomorrow. Melty face. As in like, oh my God. So it is. Is it sarcasm? It can be.

Yeah. It can be like sarcasm. It can be funny. You know what I mean? All right. I mean like, what about when Babs did that thing on air today? Melty face. Melty face.

See, I've had people use it in, oh, it's going to be 38 degrees. I guess you're melting your heart. And I'm like, well, no, I feel like people have used it for sarcasm, but now they're actually using it for their heart. I go, is this a literal one? Your problem with emojis is that you really think them literally. Do you know what? I accidentally used on the Jess and Ducko Instagram the other day,

because God forbid I would ever put my own name to using an emoji. The smiley face that has the teardrop on its forehead, not out of its eyes. Yeah, on the forehead. Like, I'm sweating. Like, uh-oh. What the hell is that? That's the Babs emoji. Like, anything'm sweating. Like, uh-oh. What the hell is that? That's the Babs emoji.

Like, anything she says that she's not sure about. Okay. It's like, take this with a grain of salt. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then people just use the emoji reply. I go, I don't know. And then I spend 20 minutes Googling it. I love it.

And the internet can't agree with what they mean. They're all different. They're all different. Don't Google the emoji. He's right back. Sure. Jess and Ducko. Ella Henderson.

Well, share some, you dog. It's filthy rich. It's filthy rich. What, he wanted to share her best friend, Georgia? She doesn't have cash. She's got good people. Come on, Ella. Share some.

If you've got some. Invite us around for dinner. Wouldn't mind some. Come on. It's Jess and Ducko. It's 6.21. I really do want to drill down on that song a little bit because she really wipes her whole family out in basically one sentence.

And then her friend Georgia gets a whole verse. I'm like, hmm. She's got something going on there. There's something going on there. Right now, I love this, Ducko. When even the government can understand, we're at our wits end. We've tried everything. But you know who we haven't asked?

The 27 million people who live in this country. Let's get the public involved. Finger on the pulse. On how to make this country better, specifically our economy and our levels of productivity. Because if we increase productivity, the economy surely will benefit. So the government has launched the Productivity Commission's latest initiative where they're asking for the public's ideas. And I had some time yesterday, so I went through all 450 submitted ideas. You went through everything.

I went through everything. A busy Monday. Because there was an article in the Sydney Morning Herald, in the opinion piece, but the dude just wrote like three out. I went, well, I want to see what other people have said. Yeah, that'd be interesting. I think so too. And look, some of them were very serious and they seem very legitimate

and I'm sure the government's going to take them on board. And then there were some other ones. I wanted to run you through my favourite. Okay. This is what happens when you ask the public for their opinions. On how to improve cost of living. How to improve cost of living and increase productivity. All right.

Offering free or affordable childcare. Yes. That's actually a great one. They don't really go into how we'll make that work. No. Taxes. Taxes. I guess it's taxes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Staying in the childcare realm, paying grandparents when they look after the kids. So, you know, we get the grandparents once a week actually subsidising and giving them some cash. To do that. So then they're in the economy. They're a part of the system. Okay.

Who's paying them that? Great question. Government taxes. Government. Good. Someone suggested the four-day work week. Yeah. I mean, that's getting a lot of steam.

Someone suggested three-day work week. Okay. Now we're taking the piss. It's a fine balance, isn't it? I love a four-day weekend. We love a four-day weekend. Oh, me too. I'll take a Friday and a Monday off.

Our company does the power down days. We don't get it. We're not eligible. We're not eligible. What's the power? They get to pick a day? Yeah, pick a day where they power down for that. It's once a fortnight.

Is it once a fortnight? So it's a four-day working week every fortnight. Love that. Oh, so it's a nine-day fortnight. Yeah, something like that. But I mean, we know they don't work Mondays and Fridays. So it's a four-day working week every fortnight. Love that. Also, it's a nine-day fortnight. But, I mean, we know they don't work Mondays, my brothers. Someone said we need to plant more trees.

If we get more oxygen in the air and we have nicer green spaces, the country will be better for it. Okay. I like that. Better bus shelters. Have you ever planted a tree? Like, actually planted a tree in a park? Maybe as a kid. Like, you know, when you do maybe like the year four excursion.

Or you're going to plant as many trees as you can for something happening. Yeah. You know what? I haven't done it in my adult life. We should all go together and plant a tree somewhere. I don't want to, you know, A show tree.

be a slave to the man. Yeah. But can we just go to a park and dig a hole and plant a tree? Let's go to a park near all of us and plant a tree. I love that. Babs, you're our resident green thumb. Pick a baby tree. Yeah. And we'll go plant it. Yeah. that. Babs, you're our resident green thumb. Pick a baby tree and we'll go plant it

somewhere. And it can develop like our show. I love that. Someone has said we should make dentists AI. Oh no. Absolutely not. I do not want AI poking around in my cavities. I think the point they're trying to make is free up dentists because they're obviously a smart cohort

of people. Get them working on something else and we'll just get AI to do their current job. What's a job you don't care about if we erase dentistry? Literally. Let's just brush it. That seems to be like someone who doesn't care for the dentist. Someone has said, I mentioned the toilets too. Someone has said, to increase productivity and thus the knock-on effect for cost of living and the economy, we should all have the Japanese-style smart toilets in workplaces and in public bathrooms.

It talks to you, it heats the toilet seat, puts you on an angle. The only thing is, that's not going to increase productivity because I'm never getting off. Oh, Casey, they're saying- Unless I can get Wi-Fi on the toilet. They're saying if you have a better toilet experience, your day will improve, and then when you come back to your desk, you'll just be firing on all cylinders, so to speak. I see. So let's make that experience as enjoyable as possible.

And the final one, which I think we can both agree on. We should be providing better, higher quality coffee in all departments, in all workplaces. I was going to say, Australia has great high-quality coffee. No, no, it should be a standard that the government... Can management here get a word of that? We have raspberry and chocolate-flavoured coffee beans here. I appreciate that someone is working out we're getting beans, but the bean people are going, let's get rid of the...

It's like when cafes do a special just to get rid of the excess barramundi they have. We know it's not special. You're just trying to clear out your rid of the excess barramundi they have. We know it's not special. You're just trying to clear out your fridge. Why is barramundi in everything today? Better coffee. I love the suggestion from that person in the public. You know what we need? More caffeine.

So these are all real suggestions. You ever made these up? I swear to you, I spent way too long. And someone said better air. Maybe that's the better trees. Yeah, that's trees. Maybe it's the better trees. But it's a cost of living crisis, Darko, so we've got to...

We're doing everything we can. We've got to do anything we can. Pay the grandparents, plant a tree. That's right. Three-day work week. Your cost of living crisis, though, Alpha Bucks. Oh, my God. $10,000 would help my cost of living crisis.

This is your only chance to call in and play today, because it's Alpha Bucks couples coming up today. That's right, that's right. And they've had to register. So, 131060. Yep. Give us a call. Imagine all the trees and the coffee and Japanese-style toilets you could buy.

Oh, we could plant Japanese trees. Oh, hello, bonsai. Oh, good little bonsai. Anyway. We should go native. Yeah, we'll go native. Yeah, we'll go something good. A Ned Kelly or a Billy Bonkers.

That's right. Thank you so much. It's into me knowing my plant knowledge. Anyway, let's play Alpha Box 131060. Let's go. Jess and Ducko in the morning. Jess and Ducko's 10K Alpha Box on hit. 30 seconds to answer 10 questions, all starting with the same letter.

We have to take your first answer. You can't use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, just say pass. Of course, we come back if there is time. And look at this. Today's player, we have Nathan! Nathan. And Nathan's having a good day.

Oh, Nathan, it's your birthday. Nathan! Nathan! Happy birthday! How are you going? Thank you very much. How old are you turning today? 26 today.

26. A great age. Great 26. A great age. A great age. A good time to be Nathan. You've gotten through the quarter life crisis. Now we can really focus on our goals and our bucket list and our dreams. He's selling in for a long haul now. What's on for the birthday

Nathan? After you win 10 grand of course. Well after I knock back 10 grand and win that, I've got the boss has actually taken me out for lunch, so that'll be really handy. Okay. Yeah, nice. And then the partner is also going to take me out for dinner,

so I'm going to be full as the day. It's Nathan's day. It's Nathan's day, as it deserves to be. Always should be. Nate, the letter you're going to work with, she's solid. We've seen her win a few times in the past. It's H.

H for... Hello. She's solid. We've seen her win a few times in the past. It's H. H for hello. Okay. Yep, no worries. Oh my god, H for happy birthday. That was a rare miss from me. Happy birthday, okay? Perfect, perfect. Sounds great. Nathan, let's do it. Your time will start after the first question. Come on, Dave. Let's go. Starting with the letter H, we need you to name a tool. Hammer. A film series. Harry Potter. A chocolate bar. Hershey's. A city. Hobart. A cleaning product. Pass. A shoe brand. Hocker.

A type of flower. Pass. A condiment. Pass. A girl's name. Hayley. Damn it. I mean, Hayley's after buzz, we'll give it to you.

Only end up with six, but could tell you're a good player. Very good. Methodical. Methodical player. I can tell you had some good responses. Hershey's, Hobart, you know, some good things in there. Very good. A cleaning product could have been Handy Andy, obviously.

Top of the tongue. Or Harpic. That one's right there. That's a tough one. A type of flower could have been a hibiscus. A condiment could have been hummus. Yeah, right up. Yeah, look, it been a hibiscus. A condiment could have been hummus. Yeah, righto. Yeah, look, it's a tough carry-on for that. But you don't go away empty-handed.

$100 to spend at Budgie Smuggler. That's all yours. Perfect. Thank you very much. I appreciate it. Happy birthday. Nate, you can get yourself some new budgies. That's a bit of fun.

Yeah, don't mind strapping me stuff in a pair of budgies. Thank you very much. Go out to dinner with the missus and then the budgies are after her. That's right. Absolutely. Jess and Ducko. A couple of blokes who are just doing their absolute most to raise money for an amazing cause.

They put the of in love, don't they? And spreading a lot of love are the two Montys, two Newcastle celebrants, Monty King and Monty Harron, who have been doing something for many years. And this year is no exception. We go now to Monty Harren, also known as Holy Matrimonty. Oh, Holy Matrimonty. On Instagram.

Monty, thanks for your time this morning. No worries. Thanks for having me on, Jess and Dr. Ed. We are talking about your amazing charity auction that is happening Friday, Valentine's Day, where couples right across the state, where couples right across the state, hey, right across the country can get involved and bid on a wedding package that you guys have built.

You've put it together thanks to some incredible vendors. Tell us about this year's package and where all the proceeds are going to go for 2025. So we've just tipped the scales at over $90,000 worth of included wedding package. Amazing. Wow. So she's a big one and you know that includes everything from the venue to your jewellery, your rings, your suits, your dress, everything you could possibly think of and we've chosen the Westpac Rescue Helicopter Service this year as our beneficiary. So it's a pretty amazing cause and, you know, an even better story for a couple if you were going to spend

some big money on your wedding anyway, but instead of paying all of these vendors for your wedding day, they do it for nothing and you get to donate the money to charity instead. That's such a good cause. So let's strip it right back. Let's say I'm sitting at home. I want to do this. Me and my partner have just been engaged. I can be anywhere in the country. I can jump on

and I could win a 90k wedding for let's say it goes for a $15,000 or $20,000 bid. That's it. In the past, this is our sixth event. So in the past, I've always gone for about half the value of the wedding. So you're looking at maybe $40,000 to $50,000 is what's So in the past, they've always gone for about half the value of the wedding. So you're looking at maybe $40,000 to $50,000 is what's happened in the past. But absolutely, you could get it for less, might go for more. Who knows? It's like any option. But also it takes the stress

away. It takes all the stress away. I know the Montys who are such pros in their field, who have worked with all these vendors before, who have seen, God, between you and the other Monty Monty, how many weddings have you guys done, seen, been to that you're like, we know what we're talking about now. We've seen it all.

We'd probably be close to 800 or 900 weddings between us. Wow. So when you're curating a dream event, you guys only get the best of the best. They're some of the Hunter Valley's best vendors and, you know, some of them have been involved for every event over the last six years. So they're very generous of them. And like you said, you can get involved from anywhere.

So a couple of years ago, it was a couple bidding via Zoom in Queensland that got the package. Amazing. Well, there you go. And, like, we know that the Hunter in Newcastle, it's just, we've got everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So why wouldn't you bring all your guests here too and make a whole weekend out of it or do whatever you want, all for a local couple, of course.

Just going through your Instagram, Monty underscore, the two Montys underscore, you've listed all the vendors who are very kindly donating. I'm seeing here pet care. I'm seeing signage. I'm seeing here pet care. I'm seeing signage. I'm seeing fireworks. I mean, this is not your average wedding. This is the bougie wedding, yeah.

Yeah, when the average Aussie couple spends, I think it's $60,000 these days is what the average couple are spending. You've created a $90,000 package and you've got things like fireworks. Crazy. It is crazy. And we've taken the stress out of it. So, for example, you know, we've got $5,000 worth of rings from Whittaker's. So all you have to do then is go and pick what rings you want.

And the same goes with every vendor. You florist and, you know, you cater, all those sorts of things. You don't have to go and find the vendors. All you've got to do is decide from what they offer what you want to make that value up from. Amazing. As we said, you can be anywhere to enter www. to make that value up from. Amazing. As we said, you can be anywhere to enter www.thetwomontys.com. Make sure you check that out. Dot au, sorry.

Make sure you check that out and get involved. But before we let you go, Monty Harrow, now you obviously know a lot about love, celebrate, been doing it a long time. We're doing Alphabucks couples at 8 o'clock. Now the couples have to work together with your better half to try and win the money. Do you have any advice for couples in working together to win cash?

Planning a wedding, winning Alphabucks, it's the same sort of teamwork. Come on. Oh, gosh, that's tricky. Yeah. I think if they have a good mo, always compliment the mo. Oh, okay. Thank you. Thank you, Monty.

Let's start with some positive mindsets. That's great, Monty. Compliments go a long way. Compliments do go a long way. So you've got, you know, an hour and a half to work on the love. Yeah, compliment each other. And the teamwork. And build it up.

The wedding, the auction is happening at Ravella in Newcastle. You know, it's a very nice venue. This Friday. But, of course, get involved at the2montys.com.au. They're all over Instagram. Monty, good luck for the auction and thank you so much for this amazing work you do for our community. Thank you so much.

We're very excited. We just got sent a funny text on the text line. You can always send texts. 048881069. This text took me by surprise. I will not lie to anyone. Took us all by surprise. But I love, I love that, again, as we've said, you don't need an invitation to reach out

whether it's on the phone, via socials or 0488881069. A whopping compliment. Huge. Not undeserved, but I'm just saying it's a compliment. Yeah. Do you want to read it? You can read it. Well, I feel like I can't read that.

Someone has texted through, unnamed, unfortunately. Please always write your name. And said, I'm a straight, happily married man. However, I have said to my wife before, if I was ever gay, I reckon Ducker would be the one I would turn for. He's good looking, funny, quick with wit. But most importantly, do you want me to read this bit? Yeah, go for it.

He's only small, so wouldn't be able to be too dominating. I'll decide that. Again, clarifying, I am as straight as an arrow. Digging down on the straightness. But respects to the Duck Clan. I guess I take it, you know. Did you want me to read that out loud so everyone could hear that? Leave your name next time. It's, you know. That's. Yeah. What? I wonder sometimes, like, dudes, I reckon I can hit on by more dudes. Like, well, actually.

You have shared. My God, we got that comment I sent to you the other day. Do you want me to, when that happens? When people say, Ducker was a gift to the sex gods. Do you want me to show you that stuff? Once again, no females are saying this. This is a gentleman. Do you want?

I screenshot that. Is there a world out there where I'm a 10? I should have been gay, shy guy. I'm fishing in the wrong pond. If you could choose your sexuality, you would, because that is a big pool of fish for you.

I think I was talking about my persona, because I held a Super Bowl event yesterday. Bunch of dudes with the Super Bowl. Oh, you said there was a compliment you received. Well, I don't know if it was a compliment. Obviously, I was going with the Super Bowl. Oh, yes. Oh, you said there was a compliment you received. Well, I don't know if it was a compliment. Oh, a comment. So, obviously, I was going for the Chiefs.

They got dismantled by the Philadelphia Eagles. Not a good day for me. You've been a Chiefs fan as long as Taylor Swift's been a Chiefs fan. Well, let's not do that. Hey, I'm stuck with them now. But there was no one else in the pub except for me and my two friends were going for the Chiefs. Oh, my God. Was everyone from Philadelphia? Everyone was going for the Eagles.

Everyone was, like, yelling. But I was also the guy who was presenting and on the mic. That's right. You're running the show. Yeah, I'm on a Chiefs kit on and stuff. And when the Chiefs were getting absolutely pummeled and I was having to come on the mic, I'd be like, there's still time. There's still time.

But it was a great day. You're the forever optimist. Exactly. People ordered. There was $1 wings before the first points. Someone ordered 100 wings. I mean, you've got to take advantage. You've got to go for it. I was going to say, before the first points. Someone ordered 100 wings. I mean, you've got to take advantage. You've got to go for it.

I was going to say, before the first points are scored, that could happen relatively quickly. It could. So you've got to take advantage. You've got to go nuts for it. We did a hot wing-eating comp at halftime. Oh, yes. Five grown men or four grown men had to eat wings

with different levels of spice. Oh, so basically a tap-out situation, the last man standing. Then they had to wait two minutes after it. They couldn't drink milk, eat the ice cream, or poo themselves or vomit themselves. Otherwise disqualified. Otherwise disqualified. Was there a tarp laid down?

No, there was a bucket, though. And there was a bloke called Stegs. Stegs was loving it. Stegs got so excited. He was around the lads. He rubbed the spicy chicken from his hands on his face. You can't be getting chili in your eyes, Stegs. No, and then he started, like, crying.

And he's just up there, like, crying. And you're there with the milk being like, ah, you've got to wait two minutes. And he came second anyway. I was like, ah, you win a free schooner. What did the winner win? More wings. Like $200. Yeah.

That was a good price. Yeah. But there was something someone said to me after all was said and done, which I've never had before. And he came up to me and he's like, Duggo, great to meet you. And he's like looking me up and down and he looked really like kind of betrayed. And I was like,, Ducco, great to meet you. And he's like looking me up and down. And he looked really like kind of betrayed. And I was like, oh, you know, good to meet you. And he's like, oh, it's been a fun day.

And he looked like he was going to say it. Then he didn't. And then he's like, I just got to say, mate, you just, you sounded tall. Okay. I was like, I looked around. When have I ever claimed to be tall? When? When you meet?

Like, I have never once said I'm tall. I'm extra medium. I got a small package. I'm 5'8". I don't help. Shagard doesn't help. We all pile on. I looked around, I was like, seriously?

But he was like, being like, yeah, you just sound taller. The most common thing, and correct me if I'm wrong, the most common thing I hear people say to you is, oh, you're not that small because we pile on so much. People have a go at me being like, you make out like he's such a shrimp. I'm like, he is. But you're telling me this person has not heard any of that and just thought you sounded like a 6'1".

But he was so disappointed, like I'd cheated on him. You do have a big personality, so people think that comes with a big body. And he was really tall. And he's like, I figured you were just tall. And he was so betrayed. Was he basically saying, we can't be friends now? I just kicked him in the shins and ran off. Screw you.

You're weaving in between his legs. Jess and Ducko. Year of the Song. Controversial game we play here at JDHQ. Shy Guy is going to give us a bunch of songs. We're going to tell him the year that they were released. You can get involved. 0488881069.

Text in. What's our theme? So the Philadelphia Eagles won the Super Bowl yesterday, so we are doing artists from Philadelphia. Ah, Flybirds Fly. Or surroundings. Of course. Oh, my God, the Fresh Prince.

The Iconic. Willie Will. Oh, jeez, when was this song? God, when was the show? When was the show, man? I must say, one of the greatest moments in television history where Will breaks down to Uncle Phil. Oh, yeah.

I never really watched the show that much. I won't lie. No. I cemented in my brain that. Oh, my God. Jesus. This has got to be 90s, right? Well, I reckon it could be earlier.

80s. Well, it's pretty. The fashion. You're right. The fashion. I'm in. I'm in. Ducker's in at 89.

Jess is in at 94. The correct answer's 1990. Oh, I get it. Oh. in. Ducker's in at 89. Jess is in at 94. The correct answer is 1990. Oh, I get it. Oh. That's it. Yeah, it's very late. Very early. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I wasn't even born. Joan Jett and the Blackhearts. This is a great song. Joan's from a suburb called Penwayne. Penwayne. Penwayne. Oh, jeez. When was this?

See, this feels big hair. Yeah, big hair. Shoulder pads. This feels 80s too, doesn't it? It does. What was I doing when this song came out? I reckon you were a twinkle in your father's eye. I was in dad's sack, wasn't I?

Let's go with... I'm going to go... Jess is in. You've never been cozier. I've never been cozier. It was a warm bed. 87 for Ducco. A hair between us. Cheap rent. 86 for Jess.... Jess is in. You've never been cozier. I've never been cozier. It was a warm bed. 87 for Ducco. A hair between us.

Cheap rent. 86 for Jess. The correct answer is 81. Oh! Two overs. Okay, okay. Next song. Oh, Pink!

No way, is she from Philly? I didn't see her at the Super Bowl yesterday. She should have been in the crowd. Doyleston? Doyleston? Doyleston? Yes. You're telling me a story, babe.

Doylestown, I believe. Really? She's got the Philly special. Doyleston? Doyleston? Doyleston? You're telling me a story, babe. Doylestown, I believe. Really? She's got the Philly special. Pinky. Okay, what's this song again? Don't let me get... Has Pink ever done a halftime show? I don't think so.

Because wouldn't she be fantastic? She'd be swinging from the roof, wouldn't she? She would. Geez, I don't know when this song was out. This could be Chuck a Blanket over Pink for me. This feels just like a pill territory. It does feel that time. It feels early.

Jeez, but like what is early for Pink, you know? You're right. She's been around for decades. She's got that many songs now. Oh, no. I think I'm going earlier. Okay, I'm in. Hang on, hang on, hang on.

When did I start high school? Where are we going? Jess is in 02. You're in 14. 2014. The correct answer is 01. Oh, damn it. You were in it. 14. 2014. The correct answer is O1. Oh, damn it. Yeah, jeez.

Just over. Just. No points. Boyz II Men. Oh, a bit of Boyz II Men. Headlined R&B Fridays a few years ago. I don't have the suburb they're from, but they're from this. I'm going to need Boyz II Men suburb.

Yeah, how do you have Doylston for Pink? Because she's one person. Where did this song come out? Is it giving 90s or early noughties? Yeah. Well, oh, crap, I've got no idea. Yeah, neither do I. They're so smooth, aren't they?

They are very silky. I'm going to take a stab, though. What have you gone? Which decade? 87 for Ducko, 99 for Jess? They're very silky. I'm going to take a stab, though. Jess is in. What have you gone? Which decade? Ooh. 87 for Ducko, 99 for Jess. The correct answer's 91. Oh, jeez, okay.

Wow. All right. Not doing too well today. God, that has stood the test of time, that song. Taylor Swift. Oh, yeah, she's from Philadelphia. She's from West Reading. Exqueeze me?

Yes, I did know that. So yesterday was a very big deal. Well, she used to go to She's from West Reading. Exqueeze me? Yes, I did know that. So yesterday was a very big deal. Well, she used to go to the Eagles pre-dating Travis Kelsey. Did she? And obviously now she goes for the Chiefs. Now, how do you feel about that? And then the Eagles fans booed her on the TV yesterday.

Yeah, we don't care for that. How do we feel about just following because your boyfriend is a... You have to, don't you? You've got to. Yeah, yeah. But your loyalties. Oh, that's a tough conundrum. Your loyalty goes to where those multi-million dollar paychecks come.

I think she's fine with the moon laughing. What song is this? Sorry, yes. You need to calm down. Oh, yes. You need to calm down. You need to calm down. Don't tell a lady to calm down.

You need to calm down. It still sounds like he's saying it to you, even though I know he's saying it to someone else. Jeez, I don't know when this song came out. You're the Swiftie. What album was this? What era was this? Was this Red?

Lover. Was this Red? Lover. Oh, now I know. Crap. I reckon. I'm not even on the board, Ducko. Okay.

I had 11 too. Oh, look at us. That's 10. 2010 for Ducko, 2011 for Jess. The correct answer is 2019. Ducco's won the game. With one point. That's one of our lowest scoring rounds.

One of the lowest scoring games we've had. Because we're clearly not Philadelphia Eagles fans. No, that's the thing. Chantella's just texting. 0488881069. We knew about Jordan Mailata, the Australian who plays for the Eagles. First Aussie to play in a Super Bowl and win it. She said, my hubby played footy with Jordan.

Fly, Eagles, fly. Well, he used to play in Aurelian. He was for the Rabbits too. But I read something like he was too big. Yeah, he's a big boy. He's like 150, 140 kilos. God damn. Found his place in the NFL.

Good on him. He seems like a lovely dude as well. Yes. Well, there you go. Wow. That was the Philly Special Edition of the Universal. And you've won it. Hey, thank you.

With one point. It's a good, I'm coming back in the games now. That was the Philly Special Edition of the Year of the Song. And you've won it. Hey, thank you. You're going to. With one point. It's a good. It's a good. It's a good. It's a good. I'm coming back in the games now.

Yes. Yeah. Here I come. Here you go. Here I come. Jess and Ducko. I've entered a weird space in mine, Ducko, with asking my husband to do stuff for me. He is.

He doesn't want to suck your toes. Okay. We've been through this. You can't keep asking. I stopped asking. And you know what? It'll be better when he just does it. He doesn't want to suck your toes. Okay. We've been through this. You can't keep asking. I stopped asking. And you know what? It'll be better when he just does it because then it's not like I begged. Yeah. Yeah.

When he's in that toe sucking mood, you know. He's not taking me out for Valentine's Day this year because he's got a big day on Saturday with a festival. So he's already said, look, I'm out this week. Yeah. So maybe next week. Okay. No, no.

My issue is for as long as we've been together, Angus has proven himself as the doer. His love language is acts of service. He's much more efficient and just level-headed with executing tasks. He likes executing tasks too, though. And he does, exactly. So now I've become pretty dependent on him to do stuff. Yeah, yeah. That's your role.

It is. It is. And I provide things to our relationship, but he does a lot of stuff. Yeah. You provide like the cheese boards and the shirts with cheese on them. And the lols. And the lols. The good times.

I provide a lot of lols. Yeah. I cleaned the sink the other day. Nice. I do stuff. No, but if I'm in a mood, I turn to Angus to fix the mood. And sometimes what I need is a little treat. Sometimes I just need a little treat.

Like a snack? Yeah. Yeah. And last night I was in one of these moods. And just forget what I've said about how busy this guy is and he's got enough on his plate. I was in a mood and I needed Angus to execute. So Lucia's crying, you're crying.

I'm just setting the scene. I'd put her to bed. Okay. I'd put her to bed. No, it's your turn to crack it. I did dinner setting the scene. I'd put her to bed. Okay. I'd put her to bed. No, it's your turn to cry. I did dinner and bath last night because he's working late. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I was in a mood. I was tired. You spent a lot of time with Lucia during the day as well so you probably got a bit crazy. She wears me down, man. Yeah, yeah. Sometimes.

She's a 10 out of 10 young lady but sometimes she wears me down. Have a conversation. Could she start talking already? I know. Go on. Hey, she's coming in today because Angus has to work early.

Oh, yeah, yeah. So we can try and make her speak because- Okay, good. We'll get her on the mic at 8.10 and try and make her speak. That'll go. It went well last time we did that. Yeah, that'd be so good. She can say more now.

It's very exciting. I hope you love dead air. I was in a mood and we had no treats in the house. Now, I'm not a huge chocolate fan. I don't really go for chocolate. I'm more of a savoury lady, but we didn't have, I try not to eat cheese after seven, eight o'clock on a weeknight because it gives me funny dreams. God, you're maturing.

I am. And I was like, I want a treat and I want a chocolatey treat. The only chocolate we have in the house is fricking fruit and nut because I married a 65 year old man. He loves fruit and nut. I went, I don't want fruit and nut. And he could see I was getting a little agitated. And he goes, do you want me to go get you something?

I said, yes, I want a chocolate biscuit. And he said, all right. What sort? Mint slice? You know, they're like mint slice. I went, no, I feel like a Tim Tam. Oh. Because we know Tim Tam's been in the news recently.

They've been in my head. They're marketing, yeah. And he's like, I'll go get you a Tim Tam. I went, yeah, you go get me a Tim Tam. But as he picked up his car keys, I had this wave of anxiety, which I have noticed the past couple of times he's gone to execute a task for me that purely has nothing to do with him. It's all me.

I get this real wave of fear. If something bad happens to him on the drive to get my treat. Get your Tim Tam. How could I ever forgive myself? Right. So we spend 20 minutes arguing. No, don't go. I've changed my mind.

I don't want you to leave. It's dark. It's starting to rain. And he goes, you want a Tim Tam? Now you're getting more angry. You want a Tim Tam? I'll go get you a Tim Tam. I went, no, no, no, no, no.

I take it back. I take it back. If you get into an accident, if there is a drunk driver on the road and he T-bones you because you've gone to get your Tim Tams, my Tim Tams, I'll never be, how can I go on? And he went, I'm just, I'm going. It'll be fine. I went, I can't let you leave. And it became this whole rigmarole.

And then you got angry at him for leaving. Did he go? He ended up going because he thought the Tim Tams would solve this anxiety spiral. I'm sure they would have. But the whole time I was basically sweating, pacing the house for him to return with Tim Tams. I couldn't even enjoy the freaking Tim Tams. It's bizarre. It's happened a lot.

That's interesting. I'm not getting much sympathy from you. You are not. No. Do you ever ask your wife to do something and then regret it? Like think about what if a bad thing happened? How you meant to look her parents in the eye? No.

She was on the road at night because she was going to go buy me some burger rings. Oh, you just leave that detail out. Oh, you got T-bone by a drug. What was he doing? Not sure. He was just heading to the shops. Yeah, see, I just think about having to face Peter and Georgia and going, he was going to buy me Tim Tams and the bad thing happened.

And then you didn't even fill out the Tim Tam anyway. No, they tasted sour in my mouth. Just want to point something out here. You did a chat yesterday just about how your friends are leaving you out of things. You're a bit difficult. I think you opened it with, am I annoying? Yeah, yeah. Well, we've all

answered that. Why don't you just Uber Eats or something? I'm going to pay a $6 fee for Tim Tanks, please. It's well worth Angus getting T-bone. What I came here for was some support. You're never getting that. It is clear to me I'm not getting that here.

Yeah, that's funny though. Yeah, you don't get, you never get this. No, but I don't ever get cravings for Tim Tams at 8pm. I'm not a psycho. Well, the theory is I just need to have a constant supply of Tim Tams. So he never has to leave. The problem is, no matter what you've got in the treat, you'll feel like something else in the treat cupboard. You're so right. Yeah, it's not, I don't think it's, I don't think it's about the Tim Tams. So he never has to leave. The problem is, no matter what you've got in the treat, you'll feel like something else in the treat cupboard.

You're so right. I don't think it's about the Tim Tams. Having an abundance of Tim Tams will make me want to feel like a Milk Arrow root. Yeah, I think you just like giving him a task and you like him doing a task for you. Maybe all I need is the fact that he said yes. Yeah. And then I go, actually, never mind. It was just a test.

Maybe it's because you're seeing him do things for other people, his job, what he's doing. And then you're like, no, do something for me. It's going down to the psyche. Oh, hello, therapist, I heard. Yeah, so really you just like it. It's just a cry for attention. Yeah. Oh, I'm a child.

Jess and Ducco. 13, 10, 60. We're asking, what did the animal break? What did the animal break? Maybe it was your animal. Yep. Could have been a pet. Yes.

Or you just witnessed a rogue creature doing something crazy. Like a rogue monkey in Sri Lanka. What's a monkey, Doug? The monkeys in Sri Lanka are getting out of hand. The monkeys are cheeky. We know they're a cheeky species. I'm pretty sure we share like 99% of our DNA. So we know they've got some cheeks and sass.

Eat fleas from each other. Absolutely. Fling poo. Fling poo, yeah. Just for a good time. They're running their own race. They're doing whatever they need to do. But they caused a complete power outage in Sri Lanka

to about three massive suburbs for four hours. That's a big power outage. What were they doing? Just being monkeys. Just being monkeys? Did they have the air con, the fridge, the toaster and the stove going? They had everything going at one time. That's how my power goes out every couple of days.

Apparently a monkey came into contact with a grid transformer causing an imbalance in the system, the energy minister said. What? About to do a full press conference, monkeys have basically snuck into their energy grid. Oh, my God, they're flicking switches. Surely a monkey's getting zapped in that. Like, surely, surely.

Yes, have we heard from the monkey spokesperson? I have not heard from said monkey. The monkey has walked away, okay? Or is the monkey fried? The monkey's fine. Yeah, monkey is fine. Okay. Little guy's all good.

I love the idea. Whenever I see, like, birds not getting out of the way of my car, I always think because another bird has dared them to play chicken. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, stay there. Because it's always the last minute that they flutter off. The last minute. This is the same.

The monkey, the older brother went, I dare you to go into the human power. You won't do it, Larry. Larry's like, I will. Yeah, I will. I'll do it. Next minute. All of a sudden, Larry's dead. Power outage. Oh, sorry. Power outage. So anyway, it happened at 11.30 a.m. in the morning and it was going until 6 p.m.

That's a long time. It's longer. That's like six and a half hours. Yeah, yeah. The energy was out for that. It was fully restored across the country at 6 p.m. that local time. Did that get the monkey tradesman in, being like, now your mate did the damage, so now you have to fix it. You've got the monkey tradie. The thing is, they'd had a lot of power outages recently over there due to storms and things like that.

Were we just blaming storms or was it other monkeys? Yeah, well, this is what they're saying. There was no storm in this one. Everyone's like, hang on, why is there power outage? They had to call a full press conference. As I said, the minister for the energy minister had to come out and give a full press conference and say basically it was the monkeys. Is this just a Sri Lankan version of a dog ate my homework?

Ah, that monkey flipped the switch. I know monkeys run right in Sri Lanka. Oh, yeah. You want a fun fact about Sri Lanka? I do. 200 types of banana. What do you mean, in Sri Lanka? In Sri Lanka. I used to work with want a fun fact about Sri Lanka? I do. 200 types of banana. What do you mean? In Sri Lanka?

In Sri Lanka. I used to work with a nice Sri Lankan lady, Kamani. She told me that fact. They have 200 types of bananas. Yep, stuck in my brain. So they've got ladyfingers,

they've got Cavendish. Plantains, would be Cavendish, plus another 197 hours. I'd like to see all those bananas. Sri Lanka looks like a paradise. I'd love to go to Sri Lanka.

It looks beautiful. Don't know a lot about Sri Lanka. Oh, wow. How mysterious. I know we beat see all those bananas. Sri Lanka looks like a paradise. I'd love to go to Sri Lanka. It looks beautiful. Don't know a lot about Sri Lanka. Oh, wow. How mysterious. I know we beat them in the cricket. Yep. I know you and your wife are talking about, you know, maybe a trip to New Zealand at some point.

Maybe we pivot to Sri Lanka. We take the show to Sri Lanka? That'd be good. Show in Sri Lanka would be good. We'll go to the power grid where the monkey was. Let's feed Shy Guy to the monkeys. That would be fun. That would be fun. That would be fun.

Shy Guy dips monkey edition, but we dip him in the monkeys. In Sri Lanka. In Sri Lanka. Remember those toys? Sure, Sri Lanka will pay for it. Did you ever have that little barrel of monkeys? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They were all linked up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Shy Guy with the monkeys. Yeah, we'll put you in the monkeys. Sure. Do you get scared? Have you seen a monkey rogue in the wild? Because they are scary. In the zoos.

No, no, no. Like, I've been to the Balinese monkeys. Yes, at the temples. Oh, they're crazy. Mate, and all the warnings about don't leave your windows or your hotel rooms open because they come in, they are brazen. But Shy Guy's had scabies, so if he got rabies, it wouldn't matter. Just cancel each other out.

It's all good. Anyway. 13, 10, 60. What did the animal break? Did the animal ruin something? Your dog used to chew on walls. Oh, Pam used to break walls all the time. She would literally chew on the wall in our rental house.

Yes, yes. Like, genuinely chew through the wall. It was ridiculous. Ridiculous. From monkeys with the power outages to dogs chewing walls. You tell a great story about what an animal broke for a radio station. Oh, yeah. So there's this touchscreen panel in one of the very important rooms

where all the computers and stuff live and keep the network on air. Yeah. There was a moth flying around and the lights were off in this room, but the touchscreen panel was bright. So the moth kept going around. Torn to the light. And it was put in Triple M Brisbane or Mix in Perth. Yeah, yeah.

Newcastle or Aeron Albury. So it was changing. The moth was changing the stations. Because it was bouncing around on the touchscreen going beep, beep, beep. Oh, yeah. Newcastle on Aaron Albury. So it was changing, the moth was changing the stations. Because it was bouncing around on the touchscreen going beep, beep, beep, beep. Oh, I love this. Someone got fired for that

but really it was the moth doing it. It was a moth. The moth did it. The CCTV revealed the moth was doing it. Yeah, you're just going nuts. Oh my God.

Flickering. So 13, 10, 60. You never suspect a moth. Or a monkey. Or a monkey. What did the animal break? What did the animal do? Give us a call.

Get you on there. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. Jess and Ducko. We're in Sri Lanka. Beautiful part of the world. Right. I'm learning that. Yeah, yeah.

How many different types of bananas did you say? 200. If Kamani is to be believed, a woman I worked with back in the day, 200 times. Imagine if Kamani was lying and you'd just come on here and said that. Well, 048881069, we are open to corrections. No one has tried to correct me. No. I don't think anyone knows.

No one knows. Except for Kamani. But we're here not for Kamani. No, no. We're here because... For the monkeys. The monkeys. The energy minister came out and said the reason we had a six and a half hour blackout,

nationwide blackout, was because a monkey got into the power grid and was just, you know, up to hijinks, causing a mischief and pretty much sent the entire place into a blackout. It's giving the dog ate my homework. It is. The monkey sent the country into a blackout. Yeah. Imagine doing that press conference being like, what are we saying? Tell them the truth.

Tell them the truth. They ain't got to buy it. Yeah, it's monkeys, man. And we know they're mischievous little buggers. I want to get a pet monkey and have, like, things in the house for it to hang on and swing around with and stuff. Do you want it as a pet or do you want it as a little butler? Oh, a bit of both.

But I want it wearing a diaper at all times. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Was it Michael Jackson? Bubbles. Remember, he had the pet monkey. Here I am, blanket. He did, I think.

I don't know what became of Bubbles. I don't know either. I don't know if I've made that up. His might be the same as the 200 types of banana in Sri Lanka. Hey, can we find out what happened to Michael Jackson's monkey out there, guys? Thank you. The producing team is looking into that. I'm also trying to look up how many banana types.

Bubbles and blanket. Okay, bro. I've just looked up how many types of banana are there in Sri Lanka. Yeah, what have we got? What have we got? 29. I apologise. That's so many types of bananas.

Kamani's giving me the bum stick. Kamani just lied to you. Oh, hang on a minute. On another website, $1,000. Okay, we don't have... That's definitely not $1,000. I think Kamani and Sri Lanka is lying. Leave it with me. Tomorrow, I'm going to have a definitive answer.

Do we have a Bubbles update, Sharguy or Babs? Was it Bubbles? Was it Bubbles? Do we have an update on said Bubbles? It's at some sort of ape facility in Florida. Okay, that sounds bad. Ape facility. Okay.

And also Bubbles was a chimpanzee, not a monkey. Let's not be getting. Let's not get monkey-est. Right now, 13106, we're asking what did the animal break? What did they break? Nick, good morning. Good morning. What animal and what did they break? Nick, good morning. Good morning.

What animal and what did they break? So I have a little border collie pup. Sort of kind of still in his mischievous phase. And he decided to chase the wife's cat through the house, didn't he? Okay. Cat thought, okay, I'm going to jump behind the TV, use it as a little hidey hole, and, well, Border Collie thought he could fit there as well.

Oh, no. Silly boy. Oh, no. Knocked it straight off the TV cabinet. Mind you, it was a brand-new 70-inch. Not your 70-inch. Papa. Oh, that would have... How are you meant to watch the darts without your TV? Three days old.

Three days. Oh, that stinks. Did you get insurance on the TV? I didn't. Oh, that is a killer. No. As much as you love your puppy, you look at him being like, I'm not happy with you.

Geez, that would be. You can't forgive that easily. Oh, that would be rough. I think it's the cat's fault. I agree. I blame the cat too. We've got Lisa on 131060. Good morning, Lisa.

Hey, how are you? So good. What did the animal break? I got my brand new prescription glasses. I went to my sister's house because I was feeding her dog while she was away and he jumped up on me, knocked my glasses off my face chewed them up and i didn't have the heart to tell her so i had to go down to the optometrist see that they had the exact same frame get them again the problem was next week i went away with my sister and she kept saying because i always

wear my glasses where are your glasses where are your glasses because i was still waiting for the new ones to get made. Oh, jeez. Yeah, and I was just like, oh, I forgot them, I forgot them. But, yeah, $2,000. And to this day, my sister still does not know. Pardon my ignorance. I did not know glasses were that expensive. Neither did I.

Two grand? Prescription. These things must have been. How blind are you, Lisa? Yes, bifocals and, yeah, pretty frames. Okay. Very pretty frames. Oh, the pretty frames. Okay. They're very pretty frames. Oh, they're pretty frames.

The coloured blue frames will get you. I love the relationship Lisa obviously has with her sister. I know, not to tell. I'd be like telling my brother, pay up. Yeah, your dog did this. You will pay. We'll wrap it up here with Brittany. Good morning, Brittany.

Good morning. What did the animal break? It was my pet in primary school. She was a bull terrier. So very, very crazy. One day she decided she was going to bite a hole in our hot water tank. Oh, wow. She full on like dug in underneath it and then, yeah, took a huge chunk out of it.

It was out there for hours before we noticed. How did you even do that? That jaws of steel. On the hot water tank? Yep. How did you even do that? That jaws of steel. On the hot water tank. How did it get through that? I have no idea. Gosh, she had a vendetta against this water tank. Did anything go wrong?

No, she was fine, surprisingly. We took her to the vets and everything. Obviously, I had the guys come out to check the hot water tank. Everything was fine. Wow. Monkeys put Sri Lanka into power outage. No water for Brittany because of the dog. Yeah, there'd be no hot water for you, Britt.

Wow. Yeah, we had to block it off after that. I can't believe they're a hot water tank. Oh, no, that was all dogs. I was seeing some people saying birds and bears, but Babs obviously didn't like them. We won't know about the birds and the bears. Dogs mainly mischievous.

Yeah, naughty things. But up next, speaking of naughty things, we have AlphaBucks couples. We do. You can work together to win the $10,000. Yes. We were unable to execute yesterday. Let's see how Lavinia and Rihanna go today. I bet their names.

I believe so. Lavinia and Rihanna. Okay. All right, fine. I'll do it next. Take it up, take it up. Turn it up. Jess and Rihanna. Okay. All right. Fine. I'll do it next. Chess and Ducko in the morning.

Alpha Bucks. Chess and Duckos. Alpha Bucks. Couples. Oh, yeah. Valentine's Day coming up Friday. So we thought, why not work with your better half, your beloved, to win $10,000? Two minds are better than one.

However, we have that pesky rule of first answer in we must take. Yes. So you've got to make sure you're on the same wavelength and you're coming in correctly. Because it's all the other same rules. 30 seconds, 10 questions, all starting with the same letter. We have to take your first answer. Can't use the same answer twice. But yes, we have to take your first answer, which means Laveena and Rihanna today are our couple.

Guys, have you come up with a strategy for this? Oh. We're on the same page already. They both brought it. Oh, sure. I don't know. Ladies, you've been together for six years. I mean, you know, the last task you did together was someone taking the lead and someone was more the follower and the support.

Like, how are we going to attack this today? Normally my anxiety kicks in, so I take the lead because I feel that she does everything too slowly. And who is that? Is that Lavinia? Yeah. All right, Brianna, how do you feel about that? Are you going to take a back seat here, are you?

Oh, no, sorry. Other way around. Lavinia's the slow one. Okay. Lavinia, would you agree with that? I'm happy to agree with that, yeah. Now it says you guys have been together for six years and you met at work. Is that correct?

Yeah. Okay. Can we say what the job was where you met or are you not allowed to? No, we were disability. They're on the same page. Look at each other's faces. This is feeling like good synergy. Yeah, I like it. I like it. And we love supporting our healthcare and disability support workers.

So we'd love to give you $10,000. What do you want to spend the money on? I don't want to spend time. We have a lot of work to do around the house, but we would also really like a holiday. So I don't know, whatever comes first. I love that. All righty.

Well, ladies, the letter you are going to work with today is the letter P, P for perfect, which is what you're going to need to be, 10 out of 10. All right? Okay. Good luck. Good luck. Make sure someone answers. Yeah, yeah, someone do something.

Your time will start after the first question. Let's do it. Starting with the letter P, we need you to name a country. Portugal. An electronic item. A kid kids TV show a hobby a car brand

something circular a flower a flower an instrument Pyramid. Flower. A flower. An instrument. An animal. Chaos. It was absolute chaos.

It was carnage from the get-go. Both saying Portugal. And that was as good as it got. We got ourselves four in the end. You would have got five. A kids' TV show. One of you got it, but one of you had already had already passed I know I've got to take the pass We need it to come back

Look we got ourselves four Kids TV show Peppa Pig Yes a hobby Painting or photography A car brand Porsche or Peugeot Something circular Not the pyramids unfortunately

No Pancake or pepperoni Or a pizza I would not have done that No look Look we had fun We don't go away empty-handed. We've got $100 to spend for you guys at Budgie Smuggler.

Thank you. You're welcome. Happy Valentine's Day, ladies. See, sometimes it shows that two brains can kind of muddle you up. I know. I know we make fun, like, the strategy of you've got to just get in first and bulldoze the other one. You kind of have to.

You kind of have to. You kind of need to, yeah. Well, anyway. If one of you is going to say, are the ladies stilldoze the other one. You kind of have to. You kind of have to. You kind of need to, yeah. Well, anyway. If one of you is going to say pyramid, are the ladies still with us? Yeah, they're still with us. I was going to say, if one of you is going to say pyramid, you've got to get in before that. We started for the wrong letters.

Always the way, damn it. Thank you, ladies. You have a great day. Enjoy your Valentine's Day coming up on Friday, and we do play that again tomorrow. See, we're asking, what are you still fighting about? We're looking for those long-running feuds, arguments, debates, maybe just those little niggly things,

possibly in your romantic relationship, maybe within amongst the family, something that you guys can't shake. Yeah. Yesterday, in Alpha Bucks Couples, we just met Lavinia and Rihanna, but yesterday we met Sky and Caleb. They're our first cab off the rank for Alpha Bucks Couples. And Sky dropped a little tidbit that we went,

let's explore this a bit more with the Rice Cookers. When we were trying to learn about their relationship, she mentioned this. We've known each other for five years, but we got together four years ago. Four years, that's a good amount of time. So you met at the pub through a mutual friend and you ended up in an argument. Is that true? Yeah, because I'm telling you, it's send it and he was saying feed it.

It's not. Wait, wait, wait, wait. The argument's still happening. Kale, what's the argument here? I don't understand. No, I said send it and she was like, no, feed it. Send it and feed it for what context? As in when you like show a drink?

No, we were in the car and I was like, he was like, oh bloody send it and I was like, it's feed it you loser. So we finally got to it. There's that thing, there's a bit of a trend you're like, send it and you knock back something or activate.

She thought the saying was feed it and even though they've been together four, known each other five, they're obviously still arguing about what the correct one was and even who said what. And who said what, yeah. I think the story's been so diluted now they didn't even know. They don't even know. Hey, they're still together and happy and there's children involved.

It's always the way with couples though, right? Because you both, you know, you love each other, but you're both probably stubborn in your own ways and you don't want the other person to be right. And as you say, the longer time goes, the more the story kind of gets vague, but you get so staunch in your beliefs. For me, it's not with my husband, Ducko, but with the second longest male relationship in my life, my brother. He and I have been arguing over something for 21 years. I've just done the maths.

I would have been 12, meaning he was 10. We still to this day argue over who choked on a grape, trying to show off about popping grapes and making a, like a, when you pop them. What? When you suck a grape. What do you mean? If you put a grape.

Yeah. We don't recommend this because you could choke. No, no, no, no. I need a grape as an example. If you put a grape in your mouth, like purse your lips and put a grape. Yeah. We don't recommend this because you could choke. No, no, no, no. I need a grape as an example. You put a grape in your mouth, like purse your lips and put a grape, and then go and suck it in. Oh. Makes a fun pop sound.

That can't be good. Yeah, it sounds dangerous. You could choke on that. I believe he choked on the grape. Right. While we were showing off to our older cousins. Right. He believes I choked on the grape.

And for 21 years. Grape gate. Grape gate. Oh, jeez. I can see where we were on a beach in Phillip Island. He choked on the grape. He thinks I choked on the grape. And for 21 years. Grape gate. Grape gate. Oh, jeez. I can see where we were on a beach in Phillip Island. He choked on the grape. He thinks Zaya choked on the grape. He made a comment about it in my wedding speech.

I made a comment about it in his wedding speech. It's just a decades long feud. It's always the stupidest thing. Stupidest thing. And now so much time has gone past. The older cousins don't remember. No one cares. And no one else cares as much as we do.

But to the day I die, he choked on the grape. It's always trivial. It's so trivial. Morgan and I are fighting over our, what day is our actual anniversary? Oh my God. You guys have been together for 13 years?

Yeah, 13 years. And it's in August sometime. I think it's August 11, but you know, I'm really bad with dates and numbers. So you've got no credibility. I've got no credibility,

but August 11, the reason I've latched onto, I think it's because it's one of Morgan's friends, Anna, or our friends, Anna's birthday. Okay. So I'm like, I must've just latched onto it. And she think it's because it's one of Morgan's friends, Anna, or our friends, Anna's birthday. Okay. So I'm like, I must have just latched on to it.

And she's like, it's not August. It's a special day. Yeah, but she doesn't know when it is either. Oh, hang on, is she debating it's not even in that month? Yeah, it's a very grey area. But I'm saying it is in August, and she's saying, no, I don't think it was in August. For a guy who forgot about his dog's birthday and then celebrated a week later, you guys aren't a dates couple. No, we're not a dates couple.

You're not a dates couple. You're not a dates couple. We forget dates. We're at our wedding anniversary. We forgot like four days after when I was asking her to get some milk. Oh, by the way, happy Annie, sweetheart. Someone has DM'd us, Jess and Ducko, on Instagram, of course. Paige, she said, for 11 years, my husband and I have been arguing over who has to change the empty toothpaste. And for 11 years, it's and I have been arguing over who has to change the empty toothpaste.

And for 11 years, it's always fallen to me. I'm like, Paige, I think you start hiding your own toothpaste until your husband realises I better lift. I need to get some more toothpaste. 13, 10, 60, what are you still fighting about with anyone? Can it be a partner? Can it be a friend? Can it be a parent? Could be a younger brother.

Jess and Daco. Jess and Daco. Jess and Daco. 13, 10, 6. You're asking, what are you still fighting about? Could be with a partner. We met Sky yesterday and Caleb, who are doing our Alphabucks couples. That's right. That's right.

We said, you know, how'd you guys meet? Like, we've known each other five years, but together four. The nightmare, we had a massive argument because Sky thought the saying was, feed it. Yeah. And Caleb was trying to educate her, not send it. Send it. But Sky was getting quite worked up. saying was feed it. Yeah. And Caleb was trying to educate her not send it. Send it. But Sky was getting quite worked up. She was very animated.

So it sounds like they're still arguing. Yeah, they're still going. Over what the correct, I've never heard feed it. Yeah, nah. I love it. I've heard feed it like he fed him like it was a fight. Oh. I've heard that.

But in the context they were sharing, we think Caleb was first. It was send it. It was 100% send it. Yeah, it's not feed it. But it begs the question. If someone turns to you and goes, floor it, and goes, feed it, you'd be like, what? What? What did you just say?

We understand alcohol was involved, so memories are hazy. Blurry. But that one was about four or five years, so we want to know how long have you been finding, arguing, debating something, whether it's in a relationship or with a family member, maybe a colleague. We go to Amber on 131060. Amber, it's with your partner you're still fighting something? Yes, good morning.

Good morning, Amber. What is it? And let us, what are we trying to help settle these debates, Ducco? Oh, yes, yes. What do you need, Amber? It's pretty simple, but it's the bins, all right? Oh, the bins, yeah. Okay?

I work this manly little job. I'm in the mines. I'm driving trucks. Yeah. When I come home, I don't want to do the manly job job. I'm in the mines. I'm driving trucks. When I come home, I don't want to do the manly job of taking the bins out. I just don't want to touch it. It's gross. I have nails and I just don't want to touch it.

And we've been arguing for three years. This argument's been going on. I tell him, this is your job. It's a blue job in my mind. And I'm like, can you do it? It's gross. I don't want to touch it. Take the bins out. I want to go to Kylie Minogue.

Take the bins out, albeit a simple activity, is the most but not as annoying job. Oh, I couldn't. And as soon as the sun goes down and it's dark, you go, now I'm scared. Yeah, what am I doing? It's best for Monday. I don't want to go outside. I want to relax.

It's raining right now. I don't want to be outside. I don't want to be's raining right now. I don't want to be outside. I don't want to be touching the bins. And Amber, what's his argument back? Is he like, no, but I've worked a hard day too. I'm getting over it. Yeah, he tries to hit me with, oh, I had a long day as well. I don't even care.

I had a long day. I've had a long week, mate. She doesn't care. She doesn't care. I've been to mines driving trucks. You do. I'm driving trucks. You've been on the laptop.

Do you know how hard that is? I have to, like, put my foot on the accelerator. Yeah, you've got to drive. And reverse. It's draining. Amber, you're not paying that. I hate to see when dinner time rolls around, the division of that. Laura, good morning.

Good morning. How are you? Wonderful. Thanks, Laura. You're also arguing with your partner about something. Yes. Not as long. It's only been about eight months.

Okay. But on our very first date, we started playing the game spotter. You know, you see a yellow car, you give someone a little punch on the shoulder. Yes. A gold car drives past, and I gave him a punch. And he thought that was absolutely ridiculous. And it just sparked this debate. All of our families and friends, whether or not gold is a shade of yellow, which it is.

Oh, hang on. So was your rule when you see a yellow car, you punch? Yeah. And you punched on gold. So it'd be like my ute rolling around, which is gold. Do you punch on that? Because really, it's not yellow. It's gold. No, hang on. So Laura, you punched on gold. No, no, no. Hold on a second. Gold is a shade of yellow. Well, that's a real grey area. I think gold's gold. No, hang on. So, Laura, you punched on gold. I don't... No, no, no. Hold on a second. Gold is the shade of yellow. Well, that's a real grey area. I think gold's gold. I think gold's gold too.

I feel like... I don't think you could have punched... If you're chucking in gold cars to the yellow... You're punching on a lot more cars now. I called for validation. I'm sorry. Sorry. I mean, yeah, you're right. I think gold's gold. What did your families all say when you got them involved? The more switched on family members were on my side.

I love it. Still going there. And that will be an argument until the day you get married. And now that we've got, like, all these custom paint jobs, you know, champagne and there's all these. It's tough. That's a slippery slope. That is a slippery slope.

All of a sudden, orange looks gold. Yeah. Cream looks yellow. Chrissy, on 131060, you and your hubby are fighting about something still? Yeah, so about 10 years ago, he handed me his key card to go and get some money out. And I said to him, what's the PIN number? And he told me the PIN number. And my stepson goes, oh, that's my mum's birthday.

Oh, so it was his ex-partner's birthday. Okay, okay, okay. So now we're three married. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on, hang on, hang on. We've been married for seven years. We've been together for ten.

And yesterday, when he asked me to activate his new key card, and I said to him, yeah, that's fine. You just need to put a PIN number in. I said, oh, what's your PIN number? And he goes, oh, the same as it's always been. Okay, so we've had an opportunity to reset. We've had plenty of opportunities. Here's the thing, though, Chrissy, to defend him and mankind.

Oh, good luck. Good luck, because I am staunchly with Chrissy here. It's hard to remember dates as it is. And when you get your first four pin code, you feel you can never change that. My pin code is still the same one. He made that decision to put that date in as the four pin code, you feel you can never change that. My pin code is still the same one. He made that decision to put that date in as the first pin code. I'm sure it would have been your date had roles been reversed, and he wouldn't have changed that either because it's so scary

changing your pin code. It never feels right. No, that is that. Wow. It's a tough carry. We need to put a poll out because I'm really annoyed now. Yeah, no, I can hear it. We're going to put a poll.

Yeah, that's interesting. Jess and Ducco will get the rice cooker's opinion. Temperature check, yeah. But what I'm hearing, Chrissy, is someone needs to change their pin code to your ex's. You've got to fight fire with fire, sis. Oh, I said that. It was so long ago, too. Like, Chrissy probably can't even remember her ex's birthday.

Yeah, she's like, oh, I know. Make it up and tell him you've gone with an ex's. Oh, that's a good one. Renee, finish us off here. It's not a partner. This is a best friend you're fighting with. Good morning, guys. Good morning.

Excellent, Renee. What's going on? So, me and my best friend have been fighting for 25 years over the fact that she stole my Spice Girls lunchbox and you won. Your what? Sorry? My Spice Girls lunchbox. Spice Girls lunchbox. How dare she? How do you make off with a

lunchbox? Like you would have had it one day and not had it the next. It's pretty obvious whose it was. Right? In my exact argument. She's adamant that she never did. I think a guilty conscience got her on my 30th birthday because she actually gifted me

the exact Spice Girl. So now the story is muddling who it belonged to. She said that she spent forever trying to find it but I believe it was just in her kitchen. I see. She's just had it for the entire time.

Does she still have it? Like, did she have possession of this lunchbox? No, I do. Oh, we're just arguing over it. Jess and Ducko. We have a special guest joining us in the studio. That's right. This is exciting.

Someone even smaller than you. That was, like, this hard? Imagine. Imagine. No. My husband has an early start today, so he just dropped on. We're trying to get Lucia on the microphone. Babs, can you bring her up and put her on mic? Yeah, come and get her on mic.

We've got Jess's child Lucia in the studio. That's right. Making your radio debut. Come here. Oh, here we go. We love Uncle Ducko. Okay, we're on the mic. Lucia, you say hello.

Come on. This is high pressure moment, Lucia. You say hello. Hi. Ducko. Ducko. Lucia, you say hello? Come on. This is high pressure moment, Lucia. You say hello? Hi. Ducko. Ducko. Lucia. Shoes.

Oh, wow. She said it. Mummy reckons you're shy. She's not a performer. She likes all the buttons. I'm going to put her on the desk. Yes. She just wandered into our tech engineer's space.

Oh, that is a room of dreams. Oh, that will take us off air. Don't press dump. Actually, you can press play. Press that one. Press play. Press play on the song. Push.

I realise this sounds good. Push. Oh, yeah. Did she actually hit that? She did. She's a genius. She pushed play on Charlie XCX. It's a genius.

It's Lucia. Oh, it's Apple now. Jess and Ducko. Charlie XCX. It is Apple. Tip now. Jess and Ducco. Charlie XCX. It is Apple. Tip breakfast, Jess and Ducco, 8.42. Happy Tuesday. Jess has charled Lucia's in here.

She just hit play on Apple for us. She did. That was... Genius. That was scaleful. Is she a prodigy? I think she's a child prodigy. You don't hit play.

She's going to be so smart. I wouldn't know. You're more skilled than you at this point. You can't do it. Now she's outside crying with Babs. Yeah, I'm going to... Don't look. I'm's outside crying with Babs. Yeah, I'm going to. You don't look. I'm going to keep my back to her because otherwise I'm going to have to go out.

Did you find this when you first had her? Because I find it now. I obviously don't have a child yet. We're on the way. I speak to her like I'm speaking to my dog. Yeah. Like I'm like, hello, chief. Sit.

Like I can't help it. I totally get that. And your Instagram feed will slowly start to change, like mine has. All I get is parenting stuff and mum hacks, all that jazz, until I started getting inundated with speak to the kid like a person to encourage language skills. I see. She's 15 months and says three words.

Yeah, yeah. So, you do you. You do you. Speaking of the kid's 15 months and says three words. Yeah, yeah. So, you do you. You do you. Speaking of the kid that is on the horizon. Yes. 30 weeks, I believe, we are now pregnant. Wow, we're close. Oh, my God.

Morgan held up one of the 1,000 onesies you gave us the other day, and she's like, in eight weeks, we're going to have someone who's coming into the world that's fitting this. It's wild. And it's funny, because we haven't seen those clothes, obviously, for ages. Yeah. Pulling them out, you go, when were they ever that small? Yeah. But it's crazy to think.

So we had our first real case. Morgan's been very emotionally stable throughout this entire pregnancy, I would say. Like, we've had our moments. You've had your ups and downs and whatever, nerve-wracking moments. She is naturally very level-headed. She is. Yeah, yeah. But pregnancy does wild things.

It does wild things. To your head, heart, everything. The emotions were flying. We were trying to plan a trip to New Zealand right now for when the baby is just in blob phase in the first couple of months. Which everyone will tell you, best time to travel with them. So that's why we're sort of trying to do it. We figure New Zealand's easy.

Blob phase. I'm not sure it's the medical term. When my skin baby is blob phase and we can get the fur baby looked after by a dog sitter. So we're trying to plan this trip to New Zealand and Morgan loves planning trips. I was planning it and she's taken she went to work that day and she came home. She had all these ideas and she'd seen things on Instagram. The South Island and we're going to travel around and she plotted it all out. We're going to drive up here, go to Queenstown and like full plan. I was like, okay, geez, you've really taken this and run with it.

And then we cracked it over something. I enjoy the use of we in that sentence, but I appreciate maybe it was coming from the more emotional person. It was coming from the more emotional person. It was coming from Morgan over a mountain. So we'd spent the entire time working at this trip and she'd planned all this itinerary out. And I was like, okay.

And then she looked at it, and she's like, wait. We can't get from this part here on the east coast to the west coast. I thought we could just drive through, but there's a mountain there, and we can't go through the mountain. Can't go over it. You can't go under it. Can you not go around the mountain? To go around, you've got to go all the way back down the bottom and go back up. Oh, it's not an easy detour. No, it's going to add, like, days because we're driving with a baby.

Who put this mountain here? And we found ourselves, it was like 9pm the other night, and she's in this full situation where she's, like, crying. And she's being like, Mount Smart is in the way. Mount Smart. Never heard of Mount Smart. Oh, no. It's okay, honey. We'll go around the mountain. That's right. We've got a decent amount Mount Smart. Oh, no. And I'm like, it's okay, honey.

We'll go around the mountain. That's right. We've got a decent amount of time. It's fine. Everything's okay. You know what? We're going to go around it. She's like, no, run.

She was so upset. And she was crying about the mountain for so long. How much extra time would it add on going around? A day or so. Okay. Yeah. So her whole itinerary is shot. It's, yeah.

She's going, I've got to cut a night out in Queenstown so we can add in a travel day. And then she's telling me we can't do the Hobbiton tour because that's in the North Island. We don't have enough time. That's like the one thing you wanted to do. That's all I want to do. It feels like it's the only thing we're not going to do.

Well, I mean, you take it up with Mount Smart as well. Tell you what, I've never seen someone so small command so much attention. Oh, amen, brother've never seen someone so small command so much attention. Oh, amen, brother. Lucia. She'll do that to you. Lucia's in the room. We've had people come past from sales.

Nick from promotions is rolling in. You never feel more like you are in an enclosure in a zoo when people are just standing at the glass looking in. Yeah, looking at us. But to be fair, we appreciate what she's... Oh, she's speaking. Yeah, she's saying on the phone. Take that away, Babs.

No phones for little babies. And you just dropped off Lucia. Is she coming to our meeting after this? I did text Boss Jase and I was like, I'm going to have a small kid. He's like, we can, with me. He goes, we can reschedule if need be. I kind of want to see her in the meeting.

Okay, we can do that. It can kind of be a bit of fun. Give her the whiteboard, Mark. Just let her go. See what she says. Take the minutes. Oh, no. But no, thank you for bearing with me. I mean what she says. Take the minutes. Oh, no. It's been a good show.

But no, thank you for bearing with me. I mean, not bad. For 15 months she's been around. I've not had to actually bring her in. Not too much. I was going to say daycare. I'm the parent. Babs is about to be on daycare right now.

Babs, come on. To be fair, Babs did say, do you want me to take her outside? I was like, no, no. She can stay with me. She's now got a pen. Yep. Things of arts and crafts. Very busy. Very busy. Oh, God. That's the with me. She's now got a pen. Yep. Things of arts and crafts. Very busy.

Very busy. Oh, God. That's the only look in I think I got DNA-wise. She looks exactly like Angus, but she got the can't sit still bug from Mama. She does look a lot like Angus, but I do see a little bit of something of you in there. You don't understand how much that means to me. I do. I'm still getting friends say, you really didn't get a look in, did you?

But thank you for saying that. Yeah, a little bit of something. The majority of it for the poor Lucia Margarita Harper. It looks completely Australian. Very Caucasian. Hey, if you're seeing this show, make sure you grab it on, listen, or review your podcast. It's a great show today.

Very fun. Very fun. Everyone, really, really delivered. Everyone was lifted. We sent it. And fed it. Well, we fed it and floored it. Up tomorrow, Shagai dips for your Wednesday.

Oh, yes. We're dipping cereals for 2025. And we also have more opportunities. Are you just pretending none of it's happening? More opportunities for Kylie Minogue tickets. Oh, yes, we do. It's all happening. Lucia, you want to add anything to the conversation?

Anything you want to say? Okay. Okay. Oh, you're excited. All right. Okay. All right. She's very excited now.

Lucia wants Kylie tickets. That's right. Was that enough of a contribution, do you think, Shy Guy? I mean, you've got to technically call in. Yeah, so true. No nepotism here. And Shy Guy will. He'll be like, that's fine, but you can't win, Lucia.

We're out of here. We'll see you tomorrow. Bye-bye. Bye. Ella Henderson. We'll share some, you dog. Jess and Ducko. That was the Jess and Ducko podcast.

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