Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - FULL SHOW | They're not birks!

Episode Date: November 24, 2025

We talk horrific injuries, Jess' daughter climbs the Christmas tree and Producer Babs talks the team though the 'flow state'Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/nick-jess-and-duckoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The new macho range is here at the cafe. Jess and Duggo. This is the Jess and Duggo podcast. You bring Nesquick into a fucking freezer. Yeah, it won't be good. You were there too. Under your instruction. Yeah.

Podcast, fuck yeah. Recall the power. We're living the day yet. Podcast, fuck yeah. Kids are fighting about the ice cream maker. That's on tomorrow. Ice cream is meant to bring people together. Isn't it?

It's one of life's great joy. Should we go for ice cream? Yeah, what are you going to get? Yeah, can I have a taste of yours? Yeah. Unfortunately, ice cream on this program has ruptured the relationship between one shy guy and one bad. It's frozen us. One of us didn't read the instructions the first time.

That's fair. We've established that. I'm on Team Shy Lord here. And I... It's not common that I... Don't make this agenda thing. You hear all is at the end of the show about an hour and 20 minutes from now. It's not common that I take Shy Guy aside.

But he told you to read the instructions. You didn't. You mucked that. We didn't get our eyes. You saw a TikTok. I know everything. Can you confirm Babs? Because we've put a lot of just detail around this and it's not come from your mouth.

What did you see that you went, I don't need to read the instructions? My brain and some TikToks. I wanted a bit more like a very confident TikToker. And Jess has left Babbs aside. I'm trying to assist. I don't want to leave my fellow lips. I just, I knew how to do it already. Yeah.

But you didn't. You messed it out. You were there too. You did. I didn't know. And I watched you mess it up. You also could have, you know what, hang on, la la la la la, la. You could have also looked up.

Whoa. Shagar, you've been in radio long enough. Just let her finish. You could have also looked up the instructions, but then you wanted to make me look like a feel. Now, give me the highlighter. You have the highlighter. You were too proud and too stubborn, and I let it happen as the executive producer.

Ah, good leading. You have the highlighter now, Babs? Well, that's just bull. Shagah, you have the highlighter again. One more. Closing statements. And now we try to. try again this week.

Yeah, but then somehow I'm going to look like an idiot because you're going to be like, oh, you didn't do that. Well, it's solely on you this week, I think. I back you in to get it done this week to cream on. I'll leave and you can do it. No, but someone needs to film. Don't we need to do socials? Oh, yeah.

She's got selfie camera. We'll get one of someone else in our team to do that. No selfies. We established that. Gen Z don't selfie. Yeah, we don't do that. Don't Gen Z selfie? Not really.

Not like videos. So I'm like blogging and stuff. I'm like, hey, what's up? Like, that's not cool. Sure. If you want it to be. God damn, I don't have any no traction on my YouTube channel. Hey guys, what's up?

Just down here at the beach. Where are we are with our YouTube? We're not. We're not, okay. Maybe next year. Okay. Possibly. With 19 shows to go.

I don't see why we can't start a YouTube channel. Hey, join Jess and Duck on YouTube up now. You know, it would be good because we'll get all our people coming. You'll chuff off and at least we have a base. Yeah. I've got to start fresh next year. That's fraught with danger. Yeah.

But you can find, I'll break. Oh, I do my own YouTube channel. Yeah, there you go. And then we'll go to court over who gets that brand. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, do you get to take it on your next venture or do I get to keep it having stayed? And your argument at court will be, he's a man. Exactly.

And as long as I got a lady judge. I just need a lady judge. Anyway, I'm looking forward to seeing you rectify the wrongs of last week. Are you tearing up? Yeah. Oh, geez, what's the matter? No, you said the word man. I started crying.

Oh, I was joking. I'm joking. No, you're good. I'm looking forward to seeing you rectify. Make sure you're following us on socials because Babs is going to give us a flawless demonstration on how to make ice cream.

How did you look like that? I thought we weren't going to put it on socials today, but we can. I didn't say today. I just said make sure you're following. You'll see it around. You've got to try the completed one. It has to be in the freezer.

Are you still doing next squick flavor? Yeah. I don't like Nextquick. Can you do a different flavor? Well, they're the sponsor. Nextquick's not the sponsor. T-Found. I was the sponsor.

teaming up with Nesquick. Oh, that's why you're doing Nesquick. I wasn't actually sure why Neskir. I was like, that's a rogue choice, but I was just saying you got, I was like, oh, we can't, we can't afford Milo. Yeah. So when they win it, they get. Neskriek was good. Anyway, I'm looking forward to the ice cream tomorrow.

You would like it, I reckon. But don't you put it in milk? Yeah. So I don't drink milk drinks. But that's, do you like chocolate, strawberry or banana? Not banana. No, banana. Sorry, are you talking about the drink or ice cream?

Ice cream planner for tomorrow I don't mind either I don't really like chocolate ice cream that much Is it a funny Of the three I'd have chocolate But Okay I'll make quick

Oh god banana banana You want banana? That could be fun A bit of breaky banana With me oats Now that you've got the clean bill Of hell from your colonoscopy Honestly

Honestly I am Now that I know I don't have colon cancer I'm like What else can I put in me guts Guys I'm fine It's just like if I get pain It's gonna go This two shall pass

She said I don't need to come back Till I'm 45 Obviously I'll be coming back at 40 Obviously Because I just want to get probed again. Imagine if you let poll ups go unchecked for 10 years. Wouldn't you just feel silly? I did think it was a bit roe when she was like, I'm 34 and she's like 45.

I was like, that feels too long. I know. I know I'm squeaky clean. And it just when they change things around medicine, and I know it's because they get more data, more research, more surveys, more science around it. But like, it's not the lady equivalent, but the only thing we get you guys don't, the PAP test, that used to be every 12 months. And then the science changed.

They went every five years. I went, mate, that's all. Long time for something to potentially happen. Even though they're the experts and we should listen, I'm sort of like, look, it's not pleasant, but I'll book in for another one. It's all right. It's a lot. It's the age for that, too.

Say again? They've changed the age for that. For when your first one should be? Got younger or got older? Got older. Oh, there you go. I think it's 25 now. Probably the most people asked me ever, like, why did you get a colonoscopy?

That was the most common. Did you find more from men? Yeah. Freaking out of it? And you're like, did you find blood or what? Because there's people like, I've had that before. Like, there was a lot of like, why did you? Why did you, though?

Like, that's weird, but also really wanting to know if they should. And you didn't have any issues getting the test? No, because I had family history. And because, you know, and I'd shown signs of what could be. But the thing about IBS and bowel cancer, and it's like all the same signs. It's like how COVID is the same as a common cold. You know what I mean? It's like all the same signs.

It could be anything. It's funny. You could get that. Yes, you had the family history card to play. So they took you seriously. But I feel like it was easy for you to get a colonoscopy than it was for meeting. get checked fertility-wise? Yeah.

It's like, oh, you haven't been trying 12 months. We're not going to do any investigation. Whereas you go, hey, can I have a test? Family history. Absolutely. You need to say, you need to go, I've got family history of infertility. Of whatever.

Yeah. Please let me have a test. If you want to get attention, you make it up. 100%. You know, 100%. Got to go on there and make it up. I couldn't agree, mom. It's your body, your health.

Yeah, yeah, checked out. If you want to take some bloody accountability for it, yeah. You should be able to. And now that I'm squeaky clean, guys. God, it's like a party in my bells. Banana ice cream Yeah, you're all invited

For Brecky You're all invited I want you to jump into my boughs We'd be here We didn't need to be invited Yeah Although Miss Frizzle It would be fun to get you guys

Inside If you had to pick one of One team member's body To jump in Come Right on the magic school bus I feel like we'd see some shit In Shire Guy

I want to know What's going on inside? Would we see nothing Like would it just be like You know what I mean Where are you travelling though All around Like the magic school bus

We'll go on the mouth And we'll just go all the way down I'd like to go up to the brain And then go down Theesophagus Look around the guts Check out your heart And then we'll go down to, obviously

downstairs You'd get into my brain It'd be the two monkeys close Hitting symbols Oh yeah Well he's doing pretty well This is what he's got Colman squeaky fucking

Yeah You'd squeak through that Oh mine would have Obstacles You would have to get over some stuff Yours would just have a whole chunks of pasta How is she functioning My blood would be like fondue

It would be thick It'd be cheesy It'd be cheesy Yeah yeah Babs what are we finding in you We'd get blocked in Babs a little bit I reckon No I've been pretty healthy lately

Have you? How's your guts been? Yeah, pretty good. I've been eating chia pudding for breakfast. That's a good omega-3sies. Yeah, been having heaps of water, having like steak and vegetables, like every night for dinner. I'm eating mean, man. You know, no dessert.

Is that too much red meat? Yeah, it could be. I don't know. Yeah, there is a limit. You know, you can find anything. But not every night, but like I switch up. Like, sometimes it's chicken. Sometimes it's rissol.

Sometimes it's steak. Sometimes it's curry sausages. Why did you get just so ethnic on me bra? Hey, she got a bit in Yorkie. Hey, sometimes, you know, sometimes Babbs has a fucking bit of salmon. Yeah, yeah. Fish tacos. Sometimes it's, yeah.

Are you guys going to the Christmas party this Friday? Yes. You? You. You got to say goodbye to everyone. You've got to say goodbye to everyone. You've got to say goodbye to everyone who hasn't said a single thing to me. 100%.

Not one person on that side of the building has come up to me and said a thing. Really? Only the people I've seen in the kitchen in passing and it's like, they go, oh. But it's like incidental bump-ins. Correct. Everyone on that side has. Not one person on that side has. Wow.

Not even a message. No, actually. He has it. Okay. That's surprising to me. I think he's sad. I think he's hurt. I think he's said like...

Do you know what? I reckon he's sad he found out on air. Oh. I reckon he's like, I would have thought we were closer. Yeah, maybe. You know, like when you're announcing your engagement or pregnancy,

you got to text all your people, you go they can't find out on social media. Yeah. I reckon he's probably going. Could be that. Hang on a minute. He let me find out on air with everyone else. Yeah.

Well, they probably found out on social media. No, well, no, they all got fan out the day before. That's true. That's right. Oh, my God. So, we heard it from Bosch, Jay. And only actually only said, I lie. One of them message me and said, like, oh, I made a herd, good on you, yada, yada.

And then I saw one in the kitchen like two days after. But apart from that, nothing. Oh, man. Yeah, seven years in the can, eh? Well, thank you so much. Yeah, I know. So come away for the Christmas party. I'll be seen with you guys.

Absolutely. And if they try and do a sign seating, don't worry, I'm going to go early. I'm going to change the name cards. To see if they are. But they're not. Who gives a fuck if they are? I'm not sitting in a song team. We'll change the names.

We'll get my makeup done. So this is, come on up. I've got a new dress, actually. Hell yeah. Wear it. This will be, this will be our last. Shut up, shy guy. Oh, now you see how it feels.

When someone else in the team fucking high fives. Or yours, I never needed when you do high fives. I'm getting my mother. Hey, can everyone just fuck off with the judge her on high fives? If you want to high five, someone, high five them. I'll say, if I'm going to get a fucking new dress, I will. Yes, sis. So now you could have high fived for that.

The team's falling apart. What's we thought did you do? Let us high five. Um, yeah. Well, it's just, I'm too far. way to high five because I've got like all these buttons around me so it's like just too far to reach that's okay but enjoy other people's high fives what i what i was going to say is the christmas party it's our last hang yep is it that's our last lunch you don't know that or last dinner

you don't know i'm pretty sure i do no you don't don't don't give away surprise of it to surprise anyway it's our last team intimate team hang with all the friends who yeah i know yeah yeah It's the friends guy. Can't miss that. Can't miss that. Yeah, it's going to be nice. And we do like the place we're going. A couple of, yeah, we do.

A couple of rosettes. Absolutely. You know what I mean? Some good bottles of rosé there. The Gilbert. That was nice. An Arvo, it's a midday so we can start and finish early. Absolutely.

Angus and I are doing odds evens for, he's got a Christmas lunch with these boys. So we're doing odds evens who will pick up. I know. Can you play the me card? I could. I could. Yeah. But he always plays the social cup.

is empty. It works so much. Oh, which... A tough one to go. It's a hard. No, come on. No, no. You can go, but... I respect that card. You can go, my social cup is completely coming to an end. That's me. Yeah, but see, my issue is I'm like, it's not goodbye. It's just, just see you later.

He gives here and me say that. That's what I said to your mum. She's like, yes, you're right, you're right, Jess. We'll still be each other's lives. See you soon. And they never saw each other again. Now, what I'm going to do is... I'm always doing this.

Can you just say where you're going eventually so I can stop feeling like having a trip up? Yeah, as of next Friday, I can. Next Friday at 8.30, I can. We'll revisit what I was just about to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah, next Friday, 30. Anyway, the point is, this Friday, it's our Christmas lunch, and I'm excited to hang out with you guys all.

Likewise. I want to see a few rosé's had from you. Yeah, I need one. Oh, no. He's demised. Yeah, Babs are going to have a couple, Jess. Fuck off judgment on the people's high vibes. Oh my God, it's got nothing to do with you.

What was you saying? We're a happy team. Enjoy the show. When I wake, wake up, wake up in the morning career. When you wake up, it's Jess and Taco.

Stop what you're doing and listen. You know I got the shit that you like. There's only one show to wake up for you. I'm not that easy to pay. Yes. Hello, how's your butthole? I'm got to explain.

Ducko. Here he is. I'm my husband. He was in Woolworth. Looking at the cleaning products. I'm going and saying, yeah, hi-bye. Don't put it back in during the song. Fuck a bass.

No, it wasn't. It was just like, well, it all flopped out. Fuck yeah, talk it. This is Jess and Taco. Right on 6 o'clock. Welcome to Tuesday, gang. Welcome to Tuesday. Mm-hmm.

25th of November, which means there are only a certain number of shows left for us to. Yep. Make each other giggle. We've only got 19 to go. 19. 19. Yes. 19.

These are our. These are getting better. These are getting more and more niche, and I couldn't be more proud of you and Babs. Did this start off for something that Jess got and did? And then it was like... Do you know what it actually started off with, Ducco? It must have been 24 shows, and I just threw to you in the moment and quickly play the 24 theme, which you always have on. I came home that day, and Angus, who, you know, loving husband listens from 6 to 9 and if he misses it, catches up on the podcast.

Without me asking, he goes, oh, that 24 thing he did. was great. You should do it every day. So it's his fault. Audio gear. And I messaged shy guy and Babs. I said, hey, Angus really like the audio gear. We've got to come up with everything. I've not then come up with another one.

These guys have done all the heavy lifting. So Angus has double thumbs up to you guys. We're trolling through the transcripts of every movie and TV show for a good reference of a number. Okay, so tomorrow's 18. Oh, there'll be heaps of 18. Yeah, yeah. I can't wait until we get to, I can't wait until we get to, when we get to... 6-7, 6-7. It's a big thing.

I thought about this last night. that yeah we'll play that when it's six plus seven whatever that day equals oh my god oh don't tell me 13 13 oh shagga's ruined it you can't do it on 13 now the whole point is it's a surprise for him shy guy he worked that out i didn't give him the answer no you did just then anyway well have i you today shagher i'm good yeah you're looking frisky today am i yeah you got this friske about you but that's okay oh well this is what happens and you the parents will get it shagai you don't sleep well that means you have to overcompensate the next day?

Yeah. So that's what your headspace is. Yeah, I'll probably end up having a nap today. Oh, I didn't nap yesterday, actually. I never nap, but I was exhausted. Are you unwell? Well, Thursday night, Rufus and a Saturday box will do that to you. In your mid-30s, fair.

Yeah, I woke up, I'm always like, a hard-rated, hard-rated solos. Morgan literally went from the couch, I was like, are you, are you dead? Like, are you okay? Wow. I was just like, I remember the last time you told me you took a nap. No, I had to go to the beach and have a swim. Oh, wow. The way.

The ocean. A little wake up. Yeah, you know, that's what happens. Oh, my God. But it was good because I messaged the group chat that people were with. And I was like, how are you guys feeling? And someone's like, I fell asleep at my desk at work and had to leave. Was that the buck or just an attendee?

That was the Rufus crew. Oh, the Rufus crew. Sorry, the Rufus crew. Yeah. Jeez, from last Thursday still struggling. Yeah. That's great. Yeah, it's true.

Yeah, just don't bounce back like you used to. You get your mid-30s and you just, you know. Do you even remember, like, Du Bois, messaging you at like 10 o'clock on a Saturday? Let's go out. I remember clear as day getting ready. You start drinking at 8pm. Yes. And I lived in like suburb.

So to actually get into town was such a mission. But I still remember one of my mates, Emily. Should we do it? Yeah, Emily, we will. And then having to ask Dad to drive me into the city. Yeah, yeah, and then pick you up again. And the thought of that now boggles the mind. I am not getting ready if the sun is already down.

No. I'd have one. One sip of my temperaneo and be like, well, I'm tired now. You go up to the bar and go, do you have any in a Greece? 20-year-old Jess didn't even know what that was. Now, yeah. Oh, God. God, no chance.

We're over the hill, man. Kids do that to you, know what I mean? Absolutely. How's our youth going today? How are you babes? Would you ever start drinking at 8pm? I have before. Yeah.

I have before do? You mean you currently do? Yeah, that's what I'm doing? You're at that stage of life? Yeah, I'm fine. Yeah. Because what are you now, 23? 24.

I get it wrong every time. 24, yeah. See, I reckon you've got a couple more years and then hangars will creep in worse. And it's that classic thing, she won't know what she's got until it's gone. Like, we can sit here like old fuddy-duddy's going, Babs appreciate it.

Even Shy Guy are just 30. Appreciate it. They're not going to appreciate it. Yeah. How do you? You can't. You can't. You can't appreciate the moment.

You're in Babbs right now. I had to try it. Oh, well, I tried to have a heart to heart with Babs the other day going, you will never have more time on your hands, Babs. Pick a hobby. Write a book. Do something with all this time. She goes, you will, please learn from my mistakes.

You know, you keep busy in her own way. Like, you got hot girl walks, you got afternoon cries, you know. Her calendar. No afternoon cries. Yeah, well, you know. Calendar is chocka block. Yeah, that is a busy afternoon. I'm pretty sure after you told me that, Jess, I went home and took a nap.

You were meant to go home and write your first transcript. I know, but I was tired. Her hobbies are Guzman, napping and walking. And Gomez. She's like a cat. She presents her belly just for a little rub. Oh, good girl. She sits at licking her stomach in the corner, looking at you in the eyes.

What's my abstering? I also had to say something so awful. You know what cats do, they just lick themselves and look at you? Exactly. And the way they, like, can get their leg up. Yeah, I know. It's crazy. Hey, look at you with your Jesus shoes on today.

My goodness. Listen to me. Listen to me. I thought someone didn't like Birk and starts. Now, child, I don't know. I didn't know. Jesus was here. All right, listen. You didn't like Birks.

They're not Burke's. Oh, they're worse. They're not... Look at those. Show them. Oh, man. That's a thick sandwich. You poopooed the ones I wanted to get.

The ones with the ugly diamonds. Yeah. Just saw those pop up. You would never want those to work anyway. I got these instead because of you. I like them. They're not burks. They're very...

They're very on the... I don't mind them. They're just very on the burke. I thought you didn't like that look. But they're not. But they... Well, I mean, that's like... They are.

I've got my stinky... You're eating a green apple and it's not a red apple. It's still an apple. It's got a bit of a different taste. I got these gifted. They add a height. But now that I do add high. I want them for the height.

Look at that. There's a quite a large flat. It's like two inches. I didn't really notice that on the website. Yeah. These were gifted very kindly. Yeah. And I agonized over the truth.

I mean, what's the difference between those and these show I got? Well, yours are normal. I got my books. Thank you. Thank you so much. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.

I've made the wrong choice. No, you didn't. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, she did. No, I think they're great. I just mean, like, I like sandals. Oh, no.

You're one step away from those ones where you can strap them around with the Velcro and just be the everything shit. These are Velcro! Yeah, they're... Ooh, no. You should never wear them out of today. I have to do spawn console. Well, this is it.

Just tag them. Look for that today. First I've got a pedicure. My toes are awful. Hey, big show. Big show for the team. Massive show. Jesus and the disciples have a big show for you.

We've got Alphabucks. We've got a chance of 10K. We've got Babs' blog. We've got more tickets for you and three mates to Ed Shearing. That's right. It's our call of fame. Blessed be thy call of fame. Yes.

Up next, though. Red flags. The careers with the worst red flags, according to Reddit. Ah, if you've got one of these, I'd be quitting today. I'd be quitting. Jess and Ducko. This is a bit of fun. It's only a Reddit thread,

but people have just basically asked, when dating, what jobs do you consider as a red flag? Oh, okay. We judge everyone on their careers. Obviously, you've chosen to dedicate your life to this. Yeah. Says a lot about you. A few big ones, and we get to some niche ones.

So, someone said crypto or an entrepreneur. Gee, see, entrepreneur could be anything, though. It could be any field. But crypto. A crypto. A crypto, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yep.

Anything I can't wrap my head around. That's what I'm like. Crypto. Someone said, I've dated two professors. So, like, you know, teachers at uni or whatever. I would never do it again. Okay. Two is too many.

And you know what? I would go, one, that could just be a bad egg. Two, we can wipe out the whole industry. At home personal trainers, because they've got to go, either people come to their house, I guess, or they go to people's houses. Okay, but PTs, they're often, you know, look after themselves, stereotypically hot. And look after other people.

Oh, is that what you say? Finish that kettlebell swing and then let me take you. Let me spot you. Sorry, yours is a bit aggressive. I missed that. Let me take you up to the kettlebell swing. As you swing up. Up to the bedroom, obviously, is what I meant, gently.

So I said cops. I've dated a few cops. My sister's dated cops, and they're all arrogant to doches. Oh, hang on. Your brother-in-law's a cop, shy guy. It is. What's say you on cops? I got nothing against cops.

He's a great guy. Good answer, sir. Good answer. I like this one. This one would be true. A psychologist. I had a psychologist girlfriend many years ago. The first few weeks were bliss,

then slowly the analysis gets in and she starts analysing everything I do and say how do you argue with a psychologist, a counsellor, a therapist, they'd always be turning it back on you, dissecting everything you're saying. I've got a friend who's a

psychologist and she is great but you have a chat with her, she gets everything out of you and then you try and get stuff out of her and she just flips it. She just flips it. It's just in her nature. Yeah, her nature. She's never used to talking about herself. It's just more about you. Let's dissect. And how did that

Make you feel ducko. Yeah. And she's only a good mate of mine. Oh, okay. Who I think needs a psychologist more often than not. He's a cop. A comedian. They're not great to dad, apparently.

Oh. Yeah, I could see that. But I mean, sense of humour is often top, if not top three qualities we look for in a partner. A comedian's always funny, though. You've got to find a comedian, you find funny. Or, no, I mean, like, you know, some comedians can be, you know, light and shade. Yeah, right. You're right.

I have heard some comedians. it's all the performance and off-stage, very dark, very grim. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Very grim. I've never dated one. This is a funny one, a mime. I mean, again, who are we to judge? I too have never dated the mime.

It would be hard. What about for dinner? You know what? Come on. Don't you mind getting me the orange juice. I don't hate charades. I mean, how long could you make charades feel fun? You couldn't stand two seconds with someone that didn't talk back.

I know you would talk a lot to them, but when we were. He gave you silent treatment on air for 20 seconds if you can handle it. I do love a game, though. And I find it hard to play games with people because people give up too easily. A mime, they're enough for life. They are playing the game. Yeah, but you would get so sick of their silence. Could you imagine that?

The dog would have to start learning out of talk because someone's going to talk to me. You want to have sexy time? He throws the fake lousseau over you and he's like pulling you. Right, that's hot. I don't hate that. Is it? Angus refuses to role play. I take a mime roleplay.

With his white gloves on? Oh. He has to have the white makeup with the frown. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll turn that frown upside down. This one's funny. I dated a horse girl. I always came second to the horse and she was weekends away and horses are expensive. That is true.

Horsy people are very horsey. Yeah, but again, the get-up, that's hot. The jodpers and the big boots and the whip. And the whip is hot, but the horse gets whipped, not you. Oh, you're right, you know. Why are you whipping patches and not me? Yeah, yeah, yeah, can I have a go? Yeah.

Put the saddle on me. Way too big. I need a miniature saddle. Take it off the rocking horse. Yeah, get it off the rocking horse. An influencer, an influencer, tough to date. But the perks, a lot of dinners, comp. A lot of comp dinners.

A lot of film everything before you eat it, then it's cold. Yes, that's a very good point. And then this is my favourite, I think. A life coach at the age of 22. Okay. Anyone who's a life coach or has a life coaching podcast. Can I also add to that? I listen to a podcast with a very successful.

woman who said her 21-year-old daughter was learning how to be a management consultant? Can you imagine being in a workplace and a 21-year-old comes in to tell you how to be the boss? I'm like, no, similar with the... I need like a 75-year-old life coach. Coach me in life that you've had a bit of skills. You've had some runs on the board.

You've had some experiences. If I had a 22-year-old, I'd be like, man, just get crypto and move to Bali. What are you waiting for? I'd be like, oh, God damn it. I'll take the mind. I think it's fair to say that, like, the cost of living crisis has dominated headlines this year, past 12 months or so. Well, not November, baby, because Black Friday's around the corner and now all this data's come out about how many billions of dollars were all set to spend. Ozzie's expected to splurge a record amount this year, Ducko.

$6.8 billion on Black Friday and Cyber Monday. day deals. So Black Friday officially is this Friday, the 28th. But if you're like me and have given your email address to a couple of brands over your time, your inbox, text messages, your social media

would have been inundated. Blowing up. I don't understand Black Friday. Neither do I. It obviously started in the States. It's something around Thanksgiving. Obviously in the run to Christmas and the big sales around shop now, get yourself sorted. And because we co-opted

everything, but it's just blown up. The whole month of November is Black Friday. I've been getting these emails for weeks. Yeah. Saying 30% starts now, 40% starts now. And it doesn't just get bigger and bigger the closer we get. Well, that's the thing. Shigar, you flagged there are some brands who are doing 30% this week, but on Friday,

they might do 50. You probably noticed a few weeks ago they started like 30% off, which they do every couple Sundays. But then like this week, they're 40% off. And probably Friday, they might go more. So when, if I bought last week thinking, oh, I'm jumping on early, I'm a sucker I'm a sucker and I'm just going to see that same item be discounted even more. When's the prime time?

Like, when's it not going to get any lower? You know what I mean? Is Friday the day? Friday will be the day. So this Friday. This coming Friday. But then you've got Cyber Monday. Like Cyber Monday surely is even better.

We've got Terabyte Tuesday. Terabyte Tuesday. But this was the interesting, actually just on the Black Friday, shall I ask you to find some of the great Black Friday deals? Oh, what are you got? What are you recommending? I've scoured every shop that I like. Maya, up to 50% off women's and men's fashion.

Bad's his favorite love honey, up to 70% off. Oh, these are. A new little toy. A new little toy. These are some good deals. KD, up to 70% off. 70? Yeah, yeah, wow, that's a lot.

Nothing upsets me more than buying something during the year. And then seeing this time again going, that, those pair of leggings I bought are now 70. But to get new airport for 170 bucks at Amazon. Oh, that's cheap. That's good. Because they're 300 on it. A prices now or a place is now putting their things up to like 300 bucks when they were 200. So the discount feels better.

It just feels like no one in this climate is giving you 70% off something. I saw a TikTok are absolutely putting brands on blast going back in the day. It would be a genuine 70%. Not mucking around with prices. And now she goes, one brand is offering buy one, get the second pair half price. That's not a Black Friday deal. They're meant to be way more extravagant. again for this time of the year.

But the one little tidbit I really wanted to just share with you, how interesting is this, the Australian Retail Association, you'd have to argue the fairer sex, us ladies, probably are considered to be bigger spenders when it comes to shopping. Well, in 2025, the lads are expected to spend way more, $132 more on average than women, at around $882 on Black Friday sales. Does it say what, like we're getting?

Tech, sporting stuff. hardware and premium accessories. I do not know what a premium accessory is. I don't even think about like golf clubs on Black Friday. Well, yeah. They're saying women are focusing sort of on Christmas gifting. The men take this time to go, Daddy does need a new set of golf clubs.

I need some new undies in a golf club. Daddy does need some premium accessories. So on average, $882 on Black Friday sales alone. Wow. What cosy living crisis? Because then you end up spending $800 that you were never going to spend in the first place. Exactly.

And none of those are for Christmas. Yeah. Just for you. And then you end up spending $1,000 on Christmas. So that's why we need Cyber Monday. Yeah, yeah, of course. Treat yourself on Black Friday. You know what I...

And then think about your miss-o on Cyber Monday. I'll speak to the good people at Westfield recently. Boxing Day sales aren't really a thing anymore. I have heard this. No one really does that. I don't know if your family was like this. Oh, you and your dad used to enjoy shopping together. Yeah, yeah.

Me and my mum, we would hang out for Boxing Day. It was an event and you'd fight people and your hustling. rush to the shops and get the sales. Now, it's all about online Black Friday. Yeah, it's all early leading up to it. It is. Oh, good luck. Good luck to everyone.

20 to 30% off tailor-made. Golf clubs? I don't know about clubs, but the kit. Let's go ahead, golf kit. Do you need a discount of balls? Balls can be expensive. And you lose a lot of balls. You lose so many.

You are literally just knocking those balls into the forest. Into the water, to the forest, into the house. There goes $25. later luck he was on sale. Jess and Ducko. Why'd you end up in hospital? Grey's Anatomy? It never rings true, does it?

It never does because I always think the Grey's Anatomy song is the Snow Patrol song. Yeah, what about this? Why did you end up in hospital? Oh my God. He's flatlining. Get the paddles. He's flatline. It's a code brown.

We've got a Coat Brown in here. I learned all my codes from Grey's Anatomy. Yeah, I don't know if they were real. Oh, I don't know if they were real. Apparently, if there's a bazooker canister in someone that hasn't blown off, it's a coat black. Oh, yeah. I'm not sure how many times that comes up, but it came up a couple times on Grazenatomy. Well, it's got to be real.

It's got to be real. Just a funny list of why people ended up in hospital can be minute, can be serious, can be a funny way you got it, whatever you think. Everyone's got a great emergency story or injury story or... I don't think I need to go to hospital. Neck minute, appendix explodes. Yeah, something really bad happens. What about this? Someone said, I'm not too bright.

and I thought the air freshener was ear freshener. So I plugged the end of the febrize. I plugged the febrize into my ear and let loose, got a burning pain and damaged my eardrums from all the pressure. Okay. I really appreciated that person started their story with I'm not too bright. Saves me from having to say it. Imagine going to the dogs,

I was just using that air freshener, like that ear freshener in my ear hole. I know with the Kiwi accent. Sometimes air, e can sound similar. But that. You get that. When you read it and it says air. People put some weird things. Like, have you done it on the candle wax thing in your ear and lit in it?

Yes. I've never done that. I've done it in Bali because, yes, they offer it as sort of a health and wellness thing. Yeah. The end of the candle gets put in the ear, but then the top gets lit and it's allegedly meant to draw out the wax. That is not a thing. No, that looks bad. I don't think the audiologists recommend that.

I don't think so. No. I went to ER for stomach pains, was worried about appendicitis, spleen, gallbladder, etc. Turns out I was just very constipated and they had to help me get. get it out. Oh, fantastic. Is that a suppository? Birth for turn.

There's a few things like, I think they can literally like, you know, open it up a bit and, you know, help you get it out. Get you out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I had sores on my tongue. I thought it was an STD. I went to my doctor.

I was super worried. Turns out it was my new toothbrush. It was firmer than I was used to. And I was brushing my tongue so hard that it caused damage. This was like I went to the dentist once and he went, I don't like the look of this welt on your, the inside of your cheek. Yeah. I need you to go see a, like, a. a maxo facelist, I think they're called,

where they specialize in jaw and mouth stuff. $400 later, Ducko, just to be told, I think you bit down on your cheek. Wicked, thanks, man. You told me it could have been cancerous. Just what I needed. Yeah, 100%. Yeah.

I thought I had a tapeworm. This is fun. I brought my specimen to the doctor in a plastic bag. A specimen of what he thought was the worm? Yeah, like so he sample. Doesn't even get a Tupperware container. Just in a plastic bag. I showed the doctor, had them look at my butt,

everything like that, when they looked at my specimen, they told me it was just the vegetable matter from the spring rolls I'd eaten the night before. Well, that's like, have you had spring rolls? I have heard when people forget they've eaten beetroot. And then I think there's blood in the stool. Yeah, totally bit. Capsicum and beetroot can do that to you.

Yeah, there you go. Vegetables, man. They're not our friend. They're not. I had bilateral hydroisleys, which is safe to say, no one would know that is. If me, my scrotum was filling with fluid and was swollen. to the size of a volleyball. The doctor, who was a young man at the time, sits there,

and he was just staring there with his jaw open. And the first thing he said was, can I get a picture of that? You do not want to be researched for your issue, and you do not want your medical professional going, I've never seen that before. I need a picture to show my friends. And also, Philips up, they're the biggest balls I've ever seen.

Way to look for the silver lining, Dougo. You take that in the heartbeat. I had a CT scan for kidney sturt. Since all that they were looking for, the notes, it said, this would hit you. It said, penis, unremarkable. Is that a medical diagnosis? When nothing's happening.

Like when it's normal. Unremarkable. You don't want that. Someone's having a laugh. I get that, shot guy. You should never get that. If you get that, you need to go get a second opinion. Even when shy guy is getting something looked at his face, they still says penis,

very remarkable. Well, he just always deroges. Like, they don't ask him to. It was like when I had my MRI recently, everything was fine. clear, but in the statement from the MRI specialist, they were like, they pretty, in summary said, brain, they're working.

Like, in real lameness terms. Well, you were going to read it, so they're like, let's not use too many complicated terms. You have one. It's right. And it's fine. Give me more details. We got to Ash on 13, 1060. Ash, why did you end up in hospital?

Hi. So, it was quite a while ago. I, um, my ex and I will live in parents. at the time and the dog started getting into a fight so i had to jump out of bed and ran down the hallway to um try and break them up and at the time my the dog's mouth closed on my hand and my finger went flying across the room oh snapped your finger off yeah yeah so i've lost the tip of my finger but to make it worse at the time like where it happened was right outside of his mom's

bedroom door and she heard the commotion so decided to come running out i had i was leaning up against her bedroom door. So I felt backwards as she opened it. She comes running out naked with a guy that she'd just snuck in the house. At the top of me. Wait a minute. So you've got no finger and your mom's come out naked with someone she's been sleeping with. My mother-in-law, yeah.

Oh, my God. And I love the phrase snuck in the house. Like, she's the teenager amongst this. Yeah. It's not her house. She'd stuck him in. So then I'd slam the door shut. And then I'm stuck in the room with this guy who's standing there naked,

holding a pillow. over him. So that's how we met. I did go on to date for a while. Yeah. So that was... Did you have conversation in that moment? She's like, can you go ahead and find the tip of my finger, please?

Yeah. It was very awkward. I was like, oh, hi. And he's like, hello. I'm like, well, I'm Ash. Can you find my finger? Ash, so if you win the Ed Shearing tickets, will you take your mother-in-law and this new guy?

Maybe. No, no. It was an ex. Yeah, he's gone now. And they're out of the picture. And he's got a story to tell for it. You can pick another free face. But as well, my argument now is, like, you know how shark survivors get back in the water?

And everyone's like, you're such a hero. Yeah. I have dogs again. So I feel like I deserve just as much heroism. Absolutely. Cudos to you, Ash. Did you get your finger reattached? We took it back, but because it was bitten by a dog, they said that it was too risky of infection.

Oh, so you're tipless now. I am. You're losing a tip. How's a goat? How does it? It was my nose-picking finger, too. It was your what? The nose-picking finger.

Wait, is that genuinely yet index? Which one did you prefer to pick your nose? Yeah. I love you to call your index, your nose-picker. Of everything the thing does. So when you unlock your phone, Ash, do you have to use your rude finger or your thumb? Yeah, my thumb now. She's your thumb.

She's tipless. She's tipless. She's tipless. Ash, thank you. Oh, Ash, thank you for your contribution. That is fantastic. You get the gist. 13, 10, 60.

Why'd you end up in hospital? Ah, do you have a crazy story that can top that? If nudity is involved, bonus points. Jess and Duckow. Why'd you end up in hospital? Hopefully you didn't flatline. Well, if you did, and you're still with us, give us a call. Oh, actually, that's awesome.

So I'll say if you're flatlined. Yeah. Hey, go on. Emergency reasons end up in hospital. Never fun. Never fun. You never want to be in hospital, no matter what it's for, particularly in the ER. I literally just last night said Angus, hey, how's so-and-so a guy he hasn't just mentioned in a while?

And he goes, oh, you're not going to believe it, actually. It was complaining about stomach pains at work, happens to work with a casual who doubles as a nurse. Yeah. She went, I don't like the look of you. You actually look, your vitals looking a little strange. Go to the ER. Seven hours, he was waiting. Just to be told, oh, your appendix is about to burst.

Quick emergency surgery. Oh, man, you do wait some time in there. Seven hours. I mean, the system's broke, but, oh, crazy. Yeah, it's a long time. But we'd love to know why you ended up in the ER. Emma texts through, 04,88,000. 1069. She goes two years ago,

I woke up with a squeaking noise in my ear. And I felt something movie. That is moving. That is not something you want to happen in your ear. Rush is up to emergency with a newborn and the 10 year old, only to be told by the doctor, there's a little brown ant in there. She goes, I was so embarrassed to be

told it was just an ant. But you still feel it moving around. To be fun, I don't think there's just about it. There's still a creature inside you alive. My mate had a cockroach in his ear. Remember that story? Yeah, in the grot house. Yeah, in the grot house, in our share house.

He had a cockroach in his ear. They had to, I think it had to, like, kill it and then break the legs off and then get it out. Because that's the issue. You pull a bit of it out, you go, this is not the whole road. Exactly. There's still some remaining. And he could feel it, like burrowing around in his head. Yeah, it's gross.

Nate has called through, good friend of the show. Hi, Nate. Hello. My friend. Did you end up in the ER? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, what happened? I think so.

All right, we'll be the judge if you did or did it. You tell us the story. Tell them what happened. So when I was four, I got this like Lego barbecue set and I was making a hot dog and I was really hungry and I ate the Lego song.

You were like, well I have done a great job on this barbecue Lego. I'm going to eat it now. Yeah. And then my mum took me to the hospital and we found it on the x-ray and then she had to dig through my poo to get it out.

Oh, that's fun for mum. Because did they have to make sure you had got it out, Nate? Yeah. Yeah. So we need a visual contact. The hot dog has left Nate. Yeah, the hot dog's left Nate.

It has, it is. I don't know mum had to do that too. Yeah. Yeah. How come you didn't rifle through your own poo to find the hot dog, Nate? Why'd you make mum do it? I don't know. I didn't really feel like it.

Yeah, obviously. Fair enough. Yeah, he didn't even know if it was in the ER or not. For all, Nate knew he was in the McDonald's drive-thru. I hope he hasn't eaten any more Lego hot dogs, but it doesn't sound like Nate learned his lesson. No, it doesn't sound like he learned his lesson. Matt.

Jess and Ducko Jess and Ducko's 10K Alphabet On hit Alphabugs 30 seconds to answer 10 questions all starting with the same letter I have to take your first answer

cannot use the same answer twice and if you're unsure of the question just say pass we come back of course if there is time we are playing for $10,000 our player today first up

Jeff Hello Jeff Hey how you going Jeff we couldn't be better We have one month till Christmas so with 10,000 $10,000 up for grabs. What do you want to spend it on?

Probably a holiday after Christmas, I suppose. Oh, that's after how big this year's gone. Yes, absolutely. What, we're talking about, the family, just the partners. Yeah, take the kids, wife and kids. All right, beautiful. Yeah, they can come along. Beautiful.

Well, maybe you'd like to consider Turkmenistan. Who? Maybe Trinidad and Tobago. Turkey, eh? Turkey, yeah. I've been there. Beautiful part of the way. world. These are all places that start with T, Jeff, and that's the letter you're going to work

with. Okay. All right. Solid. My name is Jeff. That's yep, Jeff. You ready to go? Yeah, ready to go. Good job. Go, Jeff. Your time will start after the first question, starting with the letter T. We need you in a name. An animal. Tuchamp. A periodic element. Tungsten. A clothing brand. Tommy Hilfiger. A female singer. Pass. An adjective? Pass.

A condiment. A director. A pub. A sitcom. A puff. A flower. Damn it. Came out of the gate strong, Jeff at those first three.

I thought he was booked and flights to turkey. I know. End up with four. Ended up with four. A female singer. One of the big ones, Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift. Yeah.

Yep. An adjective, tall, tiny, thick, tasty. A director could have been Tim Burton or Taekalakiki. Sitcom could have been the office. A flower could have been the humble tulip. Look, I think we'd sort of given up. We'd lost steam by then, Jeff. Yeah, yep.

We don't get the trip. We don't get the cash, but we do get $100 to spend a tradie underwear. Oh, awesome. Thank you. No worries. Mike, Jeff, I mean, toucan, tungsten. some of the most creative dancers of the I know, I know, he came out of the gates.

Came out of the gates, you. Yeah, I'll burnt yourself out there. Yeah, yeah. Start a hard early and just fizzled, you know? Like a horse that's leading the race too early. You never want that, Jeff. Went to the hard ones too early. Yeah.

Yeah. Jeff, I'm just, I'm not many really flattened me like this, but I just thought Jeff was on. Yeah, I thought Jeff was the Jet. You know what I mean? I think Jeff was the Jeff. Are you a Jeff with a Jay or a Jeff? Jeff with a G.

No, I'm a G-off. You're a G-off, I see. Well, you've got a G-off now, Jeff, because we've got to move on. Yeah. Thank you. Great good shot. Good luck with everything. Thanks, bye.

Bye. Damn. I couldn't believe. Too can. I thought we got a winner. I can tell. I can tell, Ducco, and I'm pretty sure you can too. Yeah.

From the first answer, if they're going to win it or not. Yeah. And I thought he had it. We thought we had a guy. But we don't. We didn't. So we play again at about, oh, 44 minutes of time. Alphax.

Your chance of $10,000. Up next though my wife got very offended It's something someone said about her in mum mode But this is great Because I've been copying these for a while And so for her to get a taste of it was kind of nice Okay Jess and Ducco

Ray, it's here breakfast Jess and Ducco with you 19 minutes No 18 minutes past 7 Jeez, why get that one right You look me in the eye, I know I dare I know you only got 19 shows with me But let's not start lying How could I do?

No, that's why I said 19 Because I'm just so used to that number It's actually 18 You know 7, 17, 19 left of me me. There's a lot of numbers. You're beautiful minding it. Yeah, I've got a lot of maths in my head right now, which is just clogging me. No one understands. That's why we're having such a hard

time finding a replacement for you, don't know, because you don't understand the maths that goes on in your role. People think it's just chitter-chatter and a couple of funnies. No, no. I'm always clock watching. He's basically an engineer. Do you have a civil engineering degree? Yeah. Because that's all we get. Sort of what you need. And a degree

maybe in maths and all science. I'll take one, but probably both. You have to at least on three-four chemistry in all. Oh, goodness me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I dropped science after year 10, but, you know, I did biology. Like, who did I think I was dissecting a frog? I did the frog dissection in grade 10.

I was like, that's all I wanted to get out of this, and I'm out of here. My school, we're obsessed with dissecting frogs. Why don't we dissect so many frogs? Did we do a toad? Might have been a toad, not a frog. Oh, Queensland, of course. Toads are in abundance. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it may as well.

I brought one in. And I brought a box in from home. When here you go, everyone's take one of these. Toad. Toad whacking, yeah, with golf clubs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A pest, mate. That's a community service.

Yeah, that's it. Ruining the crops. I was just doing my bit. Me and Bob Catter were just going out there fighting the Toads and Pauline. The biggest acubras known to man. Barking at journalists and whacking toads. That's you and Bob Catter. That's what we did up there.

And then we had a banana and we sat down and we went, God, that was good. You know? God, that was good. That's right. You both had your 4X tattoos. Just chatting to a bloke at the dog park the other day and you had a 4X. And I just was like, oh, duck. Oh, 4X at the dog park.

Yeah, yeah. What's the big one? Tully. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Anyone drinking at Tully is a real man. It was like 2pm on a Sunday. I went, bro.

It's knockoff time somewhere, I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 2 p.m. on a Sunday is pretty good. I mean, it's a weekend at least. Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? How do we feel about public drinking at the dog park?

I've always wondered that. Yeah. Like, my old dog park that I was used to go before Pam went, you know, a bit rogue. Yeah, couldn't be trusted. Couldn't be trusted around other dogs. Was that they used to have, like, dog park parties. And they'd bring platters, and then they'd bring beers and drinks. They'll have, like, afternoon drinks.

They brought platters. They brought food to a dog park. Isn't they just asking for trouble? Stupid, right? But they'd all bring drinks. They'd all go around and have bottles of wine and stuff like that. There you go. I thought this bloke was a bit rogue.

It was a real click, though. When you're in on it, it was when the minute sort of Pam turned and I was sort of getting bitched about it and Pam wasn't, you know. Doesn't matter how good your platter is. Yeah, I'd just watch from the other side of the creek, just like, remember my times? Skimming rocks with Pam. Being like, Pam, you've ruined this, it's got kicked down on the party. She's just there growling.

But no, drinking at dog parks is an interesting one. Yeah. It's a weird one. It's funny. He wasn't the only person. Like, he sort of chuffed off with his dog. And then I watched a young couple roll up.

I couldn't tell what they were drinking, but they had things in stubby coolers. You're not putting a can of Coke in a stubby, are you? What, I don't think so. No. What dog did 4X guy have? Yes.

Ooh. Like a, like a... I don't know why I'm making to guess. It was a bridgeback. Yeah. How was I was I ever going to guess that? I was like a stabby. Because it was the same as me.

Of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why we bonded. Yeah, yeah. We walk over. So, yeah, you bonded with that other Queensland. We bonded with, but then, well, yes, I wonder if he was a Queenslander. Probably drinking 4x.

Mother's milk at the dog park. Absolutely. Good morning to that guy. Would you take a glass of wine to the dog park? Well, now I feel like this guy's open the door to it. Yeah. When I'm wrangling, I had the kid with me. You got the dog.

That's the one I used to go to. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. I think I've adopted some of your old friends. Probably. Yeah. Heavy drinkers at that dog park. Is that where the parties would happen? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe I'll bring a platter next time. There was a full dog park hierarchy. I mean, I was captain of that place for a while. I had my time. Pam had her friends. Pam, ruined it for you. Yeah, Pam, you know, now she just sits at home, heavily medicated.

And I built a massive fence so she wouldn't bark anyone, but she still does. Just runs through the flower bed. I try and bring Gianni over and she barks at him from the gate. I'm like, Gianni chuff off. She doesn't want you on her turf. No one's on Pam's turf. No one can be on Pam's turf. So, anyway.

Even if you are bringing a platter and a forrest. Yeah, you can't be doing that. Like, no. I was going to tell you something about Morgan, but we've just, we've just carried on too long about dog park drinking. Let's go to a song and come back with it. Yeah. Well, we've got perhaps this blog now, because I don't want to bump. Oh, we can bump it.

I think we can bump the blog. As we are want to do, kind of took a left-hand turn about 10 minutes ago. You wanted to tell me about Morgan being offended by something, and I would really like to learn. Have you had this before in your, since you become a mum, right? Obviously, a bit longer than Morgan has. But I found I got this, and I spoke about it on air. I got it straight away. Like, right before.

Flow was even born. Oh, dad jokes. Oh, you're telling you a dad joke. Then she's born and, oh, you're so daggy. Oh, you got a dad joke. Or how you dress now is like a dad, even though, like, nothing had changed. You shopped at industry pre and post kid. And all of a sudden.

People see you with a different lens. Exactly. Hang on, Mork, got something in this realm. Yeah, so she posted, like, a story on Instagram. It was like a scenic story, like a good view and said something, whatever. And then a few of her friends replied being like, oh, my God, you're such a mum now. Like, this is such a mum, Instagram. story and post.

Doing just a nice view. Yeah, like a nice view and said the caption. Like, how good is that or something like that in the story? Oh, she didn't write Live and Barry, did she? Because even, I'm going to pull her up. But then the other day, she was wearing something. I think it was from your neck of the woods, Gorman. Don't tell me someone's called her.

And someone's like, pink mum mode. I look at you in your peak mum gear now. And she was so offended. And I said to her like, hey, when I got called dad, and when I got called dad jokes and like my dad mode, now and Daggy, you laughed, and now look up. Yeah, because she's young and hot and vibrant, you know. This would hit differently.

Oh, she didn't like it. She wouldn't have liked it. To be honest, I can't relate, because I've always been kind of lame and a loser. So nothing really changed for me. So no one could be like, oh, she's on the other side of the owl. So I sort of just skated through. Whereas Morgan, that's hit her hard as it. I was shocked at how hard it hit her.

Like she was thinking about it for so long and then double-guessing it. I was like, you told me not to worry when it happened to me. I think she needs to lean in wear it as a badge of pride. Yeah. You know what I mean? Don't fight it because fighting it is worse. Yeah, that's true. To try and prove that you're still, and I'm going to use the word hip.

Here we go. But that is a word I would have used 10 years ago. Yeah. That's going to be even worse for her. She's got to embrace it. I mean, when we went to the music concert of Rufus on Thursday night just gone, literally we didn't have flows. the first time both of us didn't have the daughter and my parents were looking after it and Morgan got the

best sleep she had because she didn't have to wake up at all overnight. No anxiety. We all woke up, slept in. We all woke up, bit worse where. Morgan's like, oh, I feel like I've been on a holiday. I feel so good. She is so recharged. Just from having 12 hours away from the little bundle of joy. I was in bed by tent.

Jess and Ducko. Hey, it's Babs and this is my blog. Commence Operation Superstar Bratsley. We've started noticing a trend with the young That with the nature of TikTok, where everyone can share an opinion, share their two cents, they think they invented a lot of stuff because they're the first one to maybe go viral with it on TikTok. And I have a feeling that I's going to be the same.

Yeah, what are you got for us, Babs? There's a new trend on my TikTok that's been tickling me pink. And it's a great color to be tickled. It's the flow state trend. Okay. So I was going to explain. in what flow stage is to you guys. Go for it.

Please do you. So basically, if you experience flow state at some point, it means you're like really absorbed and deeply into a task or something that you're doing. And like, you don't feel hunger, you don't feel pain. You're just fully engrossed. And then you kind of have that moment where you go, oh my God. Like, I've been doing this now for an hour and I've just totally lost track time sort of thing. Yeah, yeah.

Athletes often talk about getting in a flow state if they play really well. Yeah. Well, then TikTok has gone on to. say, well, this is kind of applied to my life, and they're finding really niche ways that they reach flow state, and it's just been really funny. Okay, please. For example,

someone said, when I'm eating super crunchy and crispy green grapes, then I genuinely reach flow state. I mean, a crunchy... Just keep going. Yeah, because you keep going. You're just like, oh my God, these grapes are so good, so good, and then it's like, oh my God, I've been eating grapes now. I think the grapes now. And grapes's

not cheap right now. You're like, I just ate $25 worth of grape. I mean you start holding them from the stammer, just like eating them like Julius Caesar would? Yeah, sure. Trying to train your dog to be the slave. Feed me. Yeah. When I'm going from his mom's Facebook to his Spotify to his ex-girlfriend's TikTok

and I reach flow state. Like stalking him? Is that what you mean? And you're like, oh my God, I've been stalking this person now for 40 minutes and I've found out what they're on his mum's man. You can get into deep scrot, like, um, scrot, deep brain rot, rot, like, um, scrolls and stuff like that. Scrolling on Instarling. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yep. When I have a meal from McDonald's, and I start switching from nuggets to fries to make chicken to drink, and then I reach flowstead.

These are different flow states to what I'm used to? To be fair, I cast a lot of judgment quickly. They've just found a way to apply it to the modern era. Yeah, it's funny. So like Michael Jordan, when he, you know, wins a game six, he gets in a flow state, nails that shot. But no, when I eat my chicken nuggets and my chips and my burger. Without even conscientiously thinking about it, then you reach for your sip of your drink.

Yeah. And you just like, you're a monk, man. You're a monk, man. You're a monk. When I'm rubbing my eyes and start to see, I'll turn it dimensions and I reach float steps. Trying to get rid of those little wiggly worms in your vision. The floaters? Yeah, the floaters.

How does Babs reach flowstall? Yeah, what do you do? For me, like, pretty relatable. It's like when I'm comfy in bed and I'm eating and I've got my favourite show on and like a really cool, like, icy water. And you just like, a really cool, a really cool, icy water. Do you mean cold or do you mean like it's awesome? Yeah, like cool, super cool. No, it's really cold.

It's like you've got your Yeti and then you've got like heaps of ice and it's really cold and you've just like snuggled in bed with food and you're watching tea and you're watching sex and this. What a state to be in. Yeah, Flo State. How does Shy Guy get into Flo State? What's Shy Guy's Flo State? That's hard. Yeah, you can go down. I'll just keep driving just because I like it.

Are you one of those guys who just likes to go for a drive? I'll be like I'll do another lap. Really? Yeah. I'll drive around my suburb. Or if you're doing it like a highway drive, you can. can really get in the flow state, where you just, like, forget. Isn't that scary, though, you arrive home and think,

I don't remember stopping at traffic lights. I don't remember putting my indicator on. Yeah. Sometimes you get it in this show when you get the flow state and things are just jiving and going well. You're like bantering. Yeah, bantering, everything's building. There's a lot of videos on that.

And Shigergo goes, you've been talking for 14 minutes. Go to a song. Wrap it up. Wrap it up. Flow state. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, TikTok's had a lot to say about this, and it's basically people your age going,

you mean you're in the zone, lull. Yeah. So you're, like, locked in. I thought this was about menstrual cycles. It's applicable. It's applicable. I see you did their flow. Yeah, I get it now.

That's what someone said. Yeah, yeah. I thought the flow state was when you were just... Ah, good times. Very good. Well done. Go home and get on your flow. Yeah, find your flow state.

Find your flow state today. Whatever it may be. Whatever you're doing. From eating grapes to driving. Yeah. To just eating McDonald's in bed watching teen wolf. Jess and daco. 30 seconds answer.

10 questions, all starting with the same letter. Have to take your first answer. Cannot use the same answer twice. And if you're unsure of the question, of course, you can say pass. We will come back, of course. If there is time, we are playing for $10,000. Our player is Cody. Hello, Cody.

Hey, guys, how are you? Cody, we couldn't be better. We have the chance to get you $10,000. The question is, are you going to perform today? I'll do my best. Okay. Well, that's all we can ask. What do you want to spend 10 grand on?

Family and I go to Bali in a couple weeks, so we'll spruce that up. Yeah, that'd be nice. That'd be nice. That up indeed. Upgrade that villa. Yep. Maybe get one with a chef included. Yeah, that'd be great.

Yeah, that'd be great. All righty, wonderful. Well, Cody, the letter you're going to work with today is N for. Nice. Nice. Going to Bali with the family will be nice. All right, Cody. All right.

Let's do it. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter N, we need you to name. A comedy film. Fast. An Aussie athlete. Pass. A fruit.

Nectoring. A technology brand. Nokia. A phone app. Fast. An ocean animal. Marwarp. An occupation.

nurse A country Nigeria A periodic element A verb A comedy film Well In the good news

We got through every question Which is a rare thing to know himself A lot of good passes We got ourselves five Passmark Five passmark It was a passmark for all the passes A comedy film

Napoleon Dynamite An Aussie athlete Could have been Nathan Cleary Amongst a few others A phone app, Netflix A periodic element, a nitrogen, and a verb. Nap or nod. There's a couple there as well.

Look, Cody, unfortunately, you do not get the $10,000. You still go to Bali and enjoy the bin tanks, not an hour dollar. But you know what you can get? We're going to keep your berries safe. Oh, love this. I'm going to give you 100 bucks to spend a trade-y underwear. Oh, nice. Thank you.

Nice bamboo jocs, breathable, which is good in humidity. Yep. You don't want to get swampy. You never want to swamp. That's what the, that should be. trade his tagline. Never want to swam like Cody. Am I right, Cody? Absolutely, absolutely. Your wife can thank us. Thank you for joining us. Because he gets hot and barley.

It does. He doesn't want to be putting telcom powder down there. No, that's what you can put down there. Exactly. The days of telecom powder are over, Cody. That's it. Particularly when you're traveling. You don't want a cloud of white powder following you. Just get yourself some trading undies. Anyway, Cody, I'm talking about your berries. Have a good one. Awesome. Thanks, guys. Have a good day.

Clay again tomorrow, seven and eight. Up next, so your last crack for the morning at Ed Shearing Tickets. Come on, it's our call of fame. Yes. Can ask one of the great petty questions. Jess and Ducko. Samba, 12 to 12. Got some...

You good over there? Sorry, I'm just rocking out. I reckon love that as well. What do you call that dance move? So that's what I call, Shaga? Sad. I never claimed to be cool. You know what?

You were in your flow state. I was in my floest. She was just dancing yet. She was jiving her. arms from side to side. Do you know what I like to do? When? Yeah, here we go.

When somebody in my family does something good. Yeah. We do the, you know, go Angus, go. You know, you pump it. No, you don't. No, you don't. So that's sort of what I was like. When you say someone in my family, you mean just you and Angus?

The kids sometimes does good stuff. Gianni, the dog sometimes. It's just you and Angus doing the go Gianni, go Gianni, go Jani, you're cool. It's a birthday. Yeah. It's that, it's that move. What do you call that? Go, she, join me.

Go Angus. That's so funny. because we put the tree up. We'll get to that in a sec. But there's a photo frame bobble. It has a picture of her baby's first Christmas. She holds it up to her ear like a phone and goes, Hello Goose!

Which is how I answer the phone to Angus. She's mimicking it up. Yeah. Hello goose. Freaky. Anyway, if she started copying some of the other crap, we say, that's not getting into it. She'd get bullied. She'd get heavily bullied at daycare.

She would. Maeve would stop playing with her in the mud kitchen. You're a loser. Can you take us in Japan, please? Of course I can. It would be great to go there. Chuggas already in a kimono. Did not take long.

Nothing underneath. He likes to be free, channeling his inner geisha. Yeah, yeah. Sure. He looks free. He does look free. I don't know they made kimonos that tall because I'm a large in Japan, so you must be double X.

No, but he's got the issue, like the large on you, very short on him, dangling out. Yeah, oh yeah. You got to be careful. It's kind of disrespectful in Japan. They're a bit more of a conservative nation. I'll remain inside. Have you ever, you don't be in Japan, hey? No, I'm not interested.

I travel for food, man, and I don't want seafood. Japanese food is so good. Sushi. Yeah. And I can get chicken terriaki down the road. I did the naked, the nude onsens in Japan. What's an onsen? Like the baths.

Oh, you get in their naked stuff. You love a bath that you're pee in there too. Yeah, obviously. In the onsend, the natural onsent, it'll filter out, right? But I remember going there naked being like, this is the best thing ever. And then three other guys came in, and then we all came in there and they sat and started to talk to me. I was like, this is.

Not sumos? Were they sumos? No, they were just... Just average Japanese men. Yeah, and I was like, this has become the worst afternoon ever. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I've probably done an equivalent.

I've done a Turkish bath, which is a similar thing. It's like a whole building sort of thing. Is it naked? You can be. Yeah. There's a lady section and a man section. But, you know, there's the pool element, the spa element, the sauna element. Yeah.

So I assume it's similar. Yeah. I did not we there, though. We're in Japan. Thanks to clarify. You're welcome. That's his schstick. It's my domain.

That's right. You'd be proud of me yesterday. I took my spirit for a swimming lesson. Did not be in the pool. Nah, what a guy. The kids did, though. To be fair, the 14 children in them. There's enough bodily fluid coming out of Florence.

You don't need to add to that. We put her under, she came out of the vomit. I was like, well, did you vomit under the water? Jeez, that's impressive. It's liquid in liquid. I know. Defies the laws of physics. Always comes up shocked after I dunk her.

I'm like, you know what's coming. We've been doing it now for 20 times. She's seven months. Oh, ready, go. What's happening to me? I'm talking about my friend who had like a four-month-old. He was like to his son, you're four months old now. It's time to stop acting so silly.

I'm like, you do get to a point. Did you actually say that to your baby? He goes, yeah, got to forgot where I was for a second. I'm going to say to Morgan. I was like, oh, her grip strength is just so bad. I'm getting worried. Morgan's like, she's seven months. I was like, no.

And she also hasn't been training. She embarrassed me. She's all neck. So now, yeah, she's got a strong neck. She's doing all neck. Could be a boxer. How about credit where credit's due instead of picking on no default, her weaknesses.

I'm here to make her better. You know what I mean? We always find the next best challenge. Now I've been really practicing a grip strength. Yeah, yeah. How? I saw this video and it was like, babies need grip strength.

And grip strength on the most important strength to have. So I've been just trying to get her to grip onto my hands and lift her up. And then when she lets go, she falls. Good way to learn. There's monkey bars near my house. You want to bring her to the monkey bars. She keeps getting a fight. It's concrete underneath, but who cares?

She's got to learn. Yeah, she's got to learn. No, I would never. So we're in Japan. Yeah, why are we here? I want to introduce you to a couple. The pettiest couple, I think, in the history of the world. O2 is the man's name and Yumi is his wife.

And, you know, that's not fair to Yumi. It's the pettiest man on the planet. Yep. O'Too, the husband, stopped speaking to his wife in 1997. Whoa. How had I been married for? A long time. 20 years goes past.

One of the sons, they got three children, a son and two daughters. the son goes to the media and says, I actually can't remember a time my parents ever spoke to each other. While he was growing up. Mum, mum would speak to my dad, but I've never heard my dad speak to my mum. Is he a monk? He's been giving her the silent treatment for two decades.

What? We do a little bit of digging, and we find out that O2, the husband, jealous of how much attention the wife was giving the children. He just goes, you know what, you're not giving me what I deserve. You were different. Before we had kids, it was all O2, O2, O2. Now it's, oh, the kids have needs.

Oh, it's all, Yoshi, Yoshi. Come on, give it back to O2. Actually, Yushiki is the son's name. Mate, I've been to Japan four times. Is every firstborn son, Yushiki? Yeah, and Mario. That's like in, it's like in Indonesia. It's like four names.

Katut. Yes. Ronda. There are, they're genuinely. I learned it in Eat, Pray, Love. But now it's he. I'm like, I'm just quoting that Amy ad. It does.

Are you sure? Quick, the four names that everyone's named in Indonesia, please, shy guy. But Yushiki goes to basically the Japanese Jerry Springer. Unfortunately, I don't have the name there. Babs has done half a job. They go to the Japanese... She was in the float state for half the time. She was.

They go to the Japanese Jerry Springer saying, my dad has not spoken to Mum in 20 years. Can you please help us? So they air all the dirty laundry on the TV show and O2 speaks, apologises, says, Umi, up until now, you have endured a lot of hardship. I want you to know, I'm grateful for everything. I'm sorry.

Shottagai, can you just name the names that you've typed? Babs, put that in, Babs. So circling back to the four names in Indonesia, I wasn't being silly. Katut is one of them. What are the other three? Way on? Made. Nehoman?

Naoman. Made. Yeah, I think it's Marde, to be fair. But yeah, it's almost like firstborn, second born, thirdborn, fourthborn, and I don't think it matters gender. It makes it easy, doesn't it? It does it make it. Easy.

You don't think of names. Anyway. Anyway, what we wanted to do here, because we do have that excellent call of fame prize. You and three mates to Ed Sheeran, that's a total of four tickets. Yeah. How long have you given someone the silent treatment? Yeah, because you can enter the chat on this discussion. I absolutely can.

It wasn't silent treatment per se, but I think we should open up to Grudge. How long have you held a grudge? O2 held it for 20 years against his spouse. I'm going on five years, doco. And I don't even know if she knows the girl I'm mad at. Probably not. it's a good friend of one of my good friends. Yeah.

And back in 2020, as lockdowns were lifting coming back in place, lifting coming back in place, our friend, Cooley, yeah, coolly organized a little boat, a little day on a boat in Sydney Harbour. Just as a like, oh, guys, you've enjoyed some stuff. Yeah. But then another lockdown sort of restrictions were put in place, and it was sort of advised, don't be doing group things. It wasn't punishable by law, but it was sort of advised.

I, being a goody-to-shoes, was like, well, we can't do the boat now? So I opted out of the chat. I went, guys, I don't, can I have my 200 back? I don't want to do this anymore. An old mate had to go with me in the chat. Being like, we're not canceling our plans just because you're a chicken. And I never said anything. Did they all go?

Well, they all went. Did you get your money back? No. She fought me and I chickened out of fighting her. For five years, I've held on to a group. Have you spoken to her since? No. Oh, my God, we hate her.

No, yeah. Did you not speak to your mum for two months? I wasn't two months. I moved out. Why did I move out? What was that about? Your tattoo? No, that was my dad who didn't speak to me. Oh, my dad did three days. That's a long time living in the same house or someone.

For Italians? Oh, my God. But to not speak. Three days about the tattoo. So I want to know, 13, 1060. How long did you go not speaking to someone? Yeah. How long have you held a grudge? But what have you got?

Maybe O2 will call. Look, that's me. He's a big listener over there. However, we've already covered his story. So we would like another one. How long have you held a grudge for? Yep. Have you done the silent treatment?

Yep. Like me, maybe they don't know you're mad at them. Yeah. But you're holding on to that little nugget. Yes. Jess and ducco. How long did you do the silent treatment for? Are you holding a grudge?

Holding a grudge. I love holding a grudge. Yeah, it must be. It's very toxic. And it only poisons you. Because like in my case, I don't even reckon my chick knows. One of my girlfriends just messaged being like, oh my gosh, she's going to hear this. I went, she probably doesn't remember.

She doesn't know. with her. She didn't think it was an issue. Yeah. We're holding this because there's a Japanese husband, Otto. Otto. Otto. Who held the grudge to his wife. 20 years, Ducko.

Silent treatment. Living in the same house, sharing the same bed. Three children who are now in their adulthood, who went to the Japanese version of Jerry Springer, saying, we actually can't remember a time where our father spoke to our mother. He would speak to us. She would speak to him.

He would never respond. And when it finally came out, It was because he was jealous. This is very problematic. He was jealous about how much attention she was giving the children. Was there never a discussion like, hey, you're okay? The last 15 years you've seemed off. I just want to check you.

She tried to. He never spoke back. She probably knew me. I'm sorry for, she would have just had to list an array of things to find it. I'm sorry for not cleaning. I'm sorry for not giving you a present. I'm sorry for, what is it? What is it?

Otto? Yeah, yeah. Finally it comes out. He was jealous. Yeah. She's not the problem, I think he is. But hey, he's apologised for 20 years of hardship. I know they're happily married.

I don't know about happily, but they are married. Norel on 13, 1060, you seem like a grudge holder, silent keeper Norel. What have you done? Oh, well, I held a grudge towards my daughter for three weeks. Oh, three weeks? All right, what happened? Well, she told me she was going for a holiday to Melbourne. So I thought, yeah, she's in Melbourne.

and that's great. Five years later, I found out she actually flew to Broome to meet up with a fella. And I was so shocked. I said, you could have been murdered or anything could have happened to you. That's right. She didn't tell you where she was. She knew you wouldn't have a lot of trouble. But Broome, a whole lot of kettle of fish.

To meet a man. I know it. Did she end up with that man? Yes, and they've got three kids now. Hang on. So you find out all of this five years later. They clearly happily together. It's all worked out fine.

She wasn't murdered. and yet you still gave her the silent treatment for three weeks. I did because it could have ended bad. It's the lesson, Jess. It's the principle of it, Ducco. The lesson. Thank you, Norel, completely justified. That's very funny.

We go to Jeff on 13, 1060, Jeff. How long did you give them a silent treatment for? August 2013. Until now? It's continuing. Oh, my God, that's amazing. Great math. That's civil engineering background coming out, Daco.

Jeff, winning. need to hear the facts of the case. What happened? Oh, there's not a lot to it. We were down the pub one night. A former friend, I'm going to call him a former friend. Ask to borrow 50 bucks off me. Lend it to him.

Never seen it again. I don't know to him until I get that money back. How long went by when you went then, hey, mate, where's that 50 I owe you? And he was like, yeah, yeah. Like, how long did he string you along before you then went, you're done? Oh, probably about three weeks. Okay, oh, Jesus. And 50 bucks isn't a lot of money,

no, but it's just the principle, you know? Again, it comes back to the lesson. At the bucks on the weekend, my mate, Chris, who's listening to this show, he could, for some reason, all his, you never trust anyone when they're trying to bet on horses when they're not allowed into any of their betting accounts. As in the betting account, has locked them out. Yeah, he's, oh, my car, my password, locked and it maxed out.

He's like, can you just, you put on 40 bucks where the bets to me and I'll get you back. We didn't win. Didn't get me back. Maybe I hate Chris for a while. Well, take a leaf out of Jeff's book. Start the silent treatment now. Jasmine, good morning. Good morning.

You're giving someone the silent treatment? Yeah, actually, my brother. Okay, how long's it been? 12 months. Well, happy anniversary. We just started talking again, actually. Okay, I take it back. What was the original dispute?

I broke up with my ex and he thought he'd go befriend him. Well, they already mates, though, like that. had good times, they played golf together, and he's like, oh, no. Oh, no, they weren't. Oh, okay, well, that feels just targeted. Jasmine. So how did you find out that they'd become buddy-buddy? Did you see something on social media, or did he mention it?

One of them actually posted a photo of them two together on their socials, and I was like, what the hell? Yeah. Did he say why he did? He said why, but to be honest with you, it was just a complete load. a BS. Oh, okay. So I took it to heart and, yeah, cut him off for 12 months and he hasn't spoken to my ex since. Ah, there you go.

He picked you over the ex. Good. That was the right choice to make. But I like to hold grudges, you see, so it did last 12 months. Yeah, mate. You're preaching to the choir. You're in good company. Yeah, yeah.

I'm glad they've resolved it, you know, siblings are important. Belinda, good morning. Good morning. Bell, wrap this up for us, babe. Are you given someone the silent treatment? My mum gave me the silent treatment for six months. Your mum to the daughter. What did you do?

We speak every day. We moved into a rental, me, my girlfriend. We're wogs. She's Australian. She popped over that week to give us a lamp. One of her lamps, it was really ugly. We didn't want to say anything. So we put it somewhere.

and she came back the following week and the lamp wasn't there because we gave it to Vinny's. She was like, where's the lamp? And my flatmate didn't say anything. And I said, oh, look, we gave it away. We gave it to Vinny's. We didn't really like it with, you know, what we've got here. She gave me that look. That death.

Sorry, can I just reestablish, Belinda? You looked your mum in the eye and said that things. you gave us was so ugly, I donated it. You are the bravest woman on the planet. It's just a rookie mistake. Just put in a cupboard and whip it out when she comes over. I wasn't thinking, less than one. Then that led to her not speaking to you for six months.

Yeah. And my girlfriend did not believe me. I was like, oh no. Oh, no. That is, I've never heard of a more dangerous, treacherous act than telling your mum, I don't like what you're doing. Your lamp has gone to Vinny's. Your lamp has gone to me. And even Vinny's said no to it. So it's hard rubbish now. Bell, what led to her rekindling and chatting again?

I mean, I had a daughter. She helped me look after her because I was working. So every time I did the drop off, she'd just like give me the shoulder. Oh, my gosh, so she'd take the kid. Wow. Yeah, just the kid. Wow. Did you end up, did you go, Mom, this is ridiculous.

I'm sorry. Or were you sort of holding strong being like. No, I was scared. You should have been scared. get before you told them. That would have avoided all of this. Oh, my God. Can you imagine if I told Lisa Vachioni?

Oh, I'm just thinking when Lucia started saying thanks to you, you're going to hold a grudge to her for. No, but see, I'm good. What do you want? Pick the thing you want. I'll just go get that. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.

I'll never buy her an ugly lamp, I promise. Jess and Duckow. Just realized I might fracture us. I have a bone to pick with you. With me or with your daughter? No, no, no. You. Here we go.

Firstly, take us to the North Pole, please. I see a lot of arguments for December 1 being when you should put your tree up. A lot of arguments for November 25, which is today a month out. Well, I was feeling festive over the weekend, Ducco. It's been a long year. It's been a tough year. May as well. Been up against it.

You know what will bring us all together? A bit of festivity in the home. You sent me a text on Sunday because I said, we're not putting our trail. We're moving. You're clearing house. So you can have our tree if you want it. And then Angus was like, please God, no. And then you said, hey, I'm feeling festive.

Can I come over on Sunday, grab the tree? Last year, stupidly, because you know when a kid comes around in the family, and they do say this, you kind of reignite the magic of Christmas because you're seeing it now through a younger lens? And I don't know, it was really special. So last year, I bought a six-foot humongous tree and all glass baubles. That's right. Because I'm an idiot.

That's very Italian of you. that my kid would grow up to be very grabby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Very breaky. Yeah. And now we're renovating. We're in a freaking apartment. Definitely can't put a six foot tree up.

Too big. And definitely can't use glass ball. So when you said, I need to clear. Into my Kmart. I think it was the F of the K tree, the $50 one. Maybe it was $70. Maybe I splashed. How old?

Six years old? Do you reckon you bought that when you first set up this house? I reckon it. I reckon I got it in 2022. Okay. Four years. Three four years. Yeah.

But when you said I'm clearing house and I've seen photos of tree. I've seen it in real life. She's a shorthy. I mean, you don't want anything outshining you too much. I'm going to be able to put the star up. And I thought, oh my God, well, two birds, one stone. Let me take it off your hands. That's one less trip to the tip you need to do. And it helps me because now I can have some festivity in the apartment with a shorter, shorter tree. Yep. Very kindly. Yeah, offloaded all your plastic baubles as well. Yeah, we gave you those. Gave us the ball balls.

Safe. I appreciate. It's funny. We got in the car. And Hangers goes, why did you take the baubles? And I went, why not? He goes, I found our original plastic bobbles. Because we didn't throw away the plastic when I upgraded to glass. Doug was like, suck up. Angus was like, oh, they're loose as well.

You had the tangled lights in there. Angus goes, was there lights in there too? Damn, wasn't meant to give you those. I've now got two sets of lights on this tree. I swear I put those away neatly too. When I was giving you the three, I was like, Angus is going to be so upset with how I've put this away. Like, it's such a me way to put it away.

He's not impressed. Because he's quite methodical. He's got the Mount Franklin water bottle, which he whines the lights on every year. Oh, that's a good hack. And he leaves it on the bottle? He takes it off, that slides it off? As in, that's the way then he unwinds to put it on the tree, but then that's the way he wraps them up nicely. And then slides it off the bottle, so they stay in that.

No, no, just unwinds from the end. So it almost is like a coiling out. I'm confused. So you've wrapped it up. Let's say, I don't have a string to demonstrate. So you've wrapped it up. So then just slowly one at a time. Yeah, but like, does he wrap it up back up on the water bottle when he takes it down?

And then he leaves it off. the water bottle for us for 12 months? Oh, yes, when he packs it away. So the water bottle is unusable for 12 months? Correct. Oh, that just feels. It's just a plastic, Mount Franklin. I thought he must have wrapped it and then slid it off the bottle and then it stayed.

That stays as the anchor. I see. That is commitment to the line. It is commitment to the organisation. I always think you want to do something like that. Then I start falling into my, oh, stuff this. You'll like me. Yeah.

I carefully take all the baubles off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Even when I'm putting them on, oh, we've got to make sure it goes red, green, In gold, and then I start going, ah, chuck some silver on there. There's two greens next to each other. So what happened? But we were feeling festive on Sunday. We get home.

Angus, you know, vacuums the space. I start setting it up. Lucia could not be less interested. She was putting nappies on her Paddington bear. She was not interested in the festivity. Obviously, Paddington did himself. Much more important work. I thought it would be a nice family moment.

Maybe she's too young. we finish we're admiring it I wanted to get the cute photo of her putting the star on with daddy kind of like we did last year mate you gave us a star it's kind of broken but it's still a star we don't have another one I was like can I put a Santa hat as the star

we've got to just go with the broken Alan Duckett star she absolutely kicked off Angus trying to pick her up to put the star she didn't want a bar of it that's fine can't force her to do anything we take it in for a whole hot second, no worries, go about our, go about our rest of our afternoon. Yeah. You know that classic thing, Flo, I don't think is old enough for this yet.

It's a bit too quiet. I think I was doing something in the bedroom. Angus was doing something in one of the, like the bathroom or whatever. And I went, it's a bit too quiet. What's the kid doing? I come back into the living room, she's climbing your Christmas tree. Dirty? No, that's the thing.

Basically, I have caught her just as a sort of toppling. She's never climbed a tree at the park. Park. I don't know what about this. It was a little tree. It was attainable. Because it's little and all the prongs, obviously, are perfect. I don't know how she's done. Maybe she got up on the couch and then started. It looks comfy to jump on if you're a kid.

It looks like it would catch you. The play thing. And obviously, we've had such a good time decorating it. She's like, this is a toy. This is fun. This is just another toy. So I don't know if the tree is even going to see December 1st, let alone Christmas. You know what was funny.

When you guys left, I said to Morgan, I was like, I think that's the first time in my relationship with Jess that Jess and Angus have taken something off us, not the other way around. And I was like, and I don't think it's going to work well for them. And it didn't. Yes and Docco. Nine o'clock.

Look at that. Right on time, team. Do you remember a few weeks ago, I told you about spotting the landscaper who drives around in a work van? Yep. The cooch doctor? The cooch doctor.

We've just received a photo of it in the wild. A rice cooker has spotted. Cooker has spotted the Cooch Doctor. No way. Sent us a photo on the Jess and Ducko Instagram page. Thank you. I feel like it's bingo. I want you to win a prize.

I've got nothing to give you. You see the Cooch Doctor in the Wild. Always snap a photo. I think that's prize enough. Yeah. Spotting the Coch Doctor. Isn't that beautiful seeing the Cooch Doctor in the flesh? Very good.

And the Cooch Doctor's never phoned in. Didn't hear it. No. I can't believe. You know, no one's passed it on. Yeah. That's okay. Let's keep it elusive.

I want it to be organic. Elusive cooch. Goodness, that are better. Yeah. No. Oh, that's cute. That cooched is zooming around. Absolutely.

Now, Babs, 15 minutes ago, you lit a fire under us. Yep. Added some extra fuel in the tank to bring us home. Yep. Did we do you proud? You did. Good job, guys. Oh, my God.

Thank you, Babs. Thank you so much. Thank you, Babs. No thank you to shy guys. Yeah, no. You had zero motivational speak for us. You're welcome. That was me breaking the glass.

That's right. You booing and breaking the glass. Just throwing plates at walls. That's right. But Babs and Chaga have a big day today because they've got their Dolce ice cream makeup. Yeah, we're making ice cream. Can you not stuff it up this week, please? No one got to have a taste last week.

Babs spent two months talking about it and then mucked up. My instruction, which was to read the instruction. That's not what happened. Yes, it is. I said, what did the recipe say? You said, I've washed a TikTok. I know how to do it. I felt like I was being mansplained.

So then I was like, well, I've got to take child here and just do what it all. Then you start to say that's all it turn out of you. You lose all integrity. His mansplaining was read the instructions. No, but to be fair, I did get it right. I just forgot an ingredient, which is not my fault. Well, that's getting it wrong. I think you forgot too.

You didn't know that ingredient either. It wasn't my job. That was your job. She still can't admit she was wrong. She won't do it. I wasn't wrong. But you missed an ingredient. And then she calls me up a mansplaining.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't win. I'm allowed to accuse you of that. Perhaps I really want to be. Both of you shut up. She tried her best, all right? No, I'm trying to support my sister here. Not that I want strawberry-nest quick ice cream, fine.

Without cream in it? Without cream. And did you need condensed milk? Yeah, who knows put condensed milk? Hey, the resume. No one knows that. You can make us like margaritas tomorrow or something, because it does that too. Exactly.

That'd be a bit easier. I'd actually like to showcase one of the other features. We know we can do ice cream. It's in the title. But it's got so many other buttons. I got some tequila at home. That next week. Hell yeah.

No one tell her how to do it. No, no. Let her watch a TikTok So she's doing that tape Because we've got Shagai Licks tomorrow On the wind down to the end of the year Shagai is not dipping, he's licking

That's right You can win one of these Teafel Dalchi ice cream makers Perfect for summer And it will come with the instruction Leaflet If you want to read it or not That is your prerogative

Yeah If your husband just do TikTok Just do it If you want to just do TikTok It's your prerogative It will then become your ice cream maker Yeah But he's gonna

He's gonna lick something You're gonna lick it good God there was controversy Last week Because he was licking cyclone and someone said, you said it was an ice cream. Cyclones aren't an ice cream. Cyclone's like a sorbet.

It's always that sort of texture. Like a melon. Do you know what you're going to lick tomorrow? No. All right. So it might be an ice cream. It might be an ice cream. Are you getting it today?

You getting the cream of choice today. Oh, someone sent me a really funny message about what to say when you, damn, what did they say? Because I was like, I'll use this. You know, when they go, I'm so excited. I just, um, we kind of workshop that. Yeah, damn, what was it? Something about lick?

I was no cream, but... Ooh, cream old. Yeah, something like, yeah. I'll have to go find it. All right, go back through the DMs, we'll come back with it tomorrow. I think it was really funny. I had a laugh at it. I was like, I'll use this.

And then I forgot my memory. Funny, but not memorable. I know. I don't know how I'm going to find in my DMs either. You know, you can search? Just in your search. In your DMs, in your DMs, I did not know you can... Not in the Instagram search.

No, no, in the DM search. No, no, type in lick. You've got to assume it's lick. They've referenced lick. No, no other result. Oh, here we go. Did you find it? Guys, that's incredible.

Call me tech guy. You should replace box with cream for shy guy licks when they win. Hi, my name's Jess, and I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I just won shy guy's cream. Licked. You can't say licked your cream. Yeah, but you could do Lickshed cream. I'm so excited, I just want Shagai's cream.

I'm so excited, I just had Shagai's cream. That works. Okay. You'd be saying it at 7.43 minutes. Do you want to give credit to that person? What was their name? Metab. There you go.

I said, I love this. We want to bring it up next Wednesday. Will, I did it a day early. Tabby, Tabby's his name. Classic daco. Yeah, that's why we're not, that's not sure. Docko licks. Yeah, we wouldn't get through it.

You wouldn't give enough clues away. I'd play the opener. It's over. Very challenging to then guess. Very challenging. It's an opener, to be fair to me. I'm only human Hey, we're out of here

I insist you get the podcast Yeah, yeah, you must You must We will, see you tomorrow Bye bye I didn't know, Jesus was here They're not Burks Oh, they're worse

They're not Oh man That's a thick sandal You poopooed the ones I wanted to get I like them Jess and Ducko That was the Jess and Ducko podcast The new macho range is here at McCaffee.