Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - I've been doing but stuff wrong

Episode Date: March 9, 2026

Rohan discovers his videos are being dubbed in other languages, Producer Babs has a new blog for us and Jess' dad is doing life wrong when it comes to getting hot chips for the fam!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/jess-and-rohanSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Try the big Brecky Range with Honey Siracha today. Only at Maccas. Here we go. Welcome to the Jess and Rowan podcast. Hello everybody. Welcome to the pod. And by the way, I just wanted to say quickly, thank you for always hitting the five stars. Thank you for following on your preferred platform. Obviously, listeners got them going on, but people listen everywhere.

Absolutely. It's funny on today's show, Rowan, we talk about what are you quietly judging people for? Oh, yeah. And one of my friends, well, she kind of loudly judged me because she did make a point of it. I sent her a podcast. the other day. Actually, my girl Mel Robbins sent her a link. She wrote back being like, what's with the Apple

podcast link? I said, what do you mean? She goes, aren't we listening to podcasts on Spotify? Isn't that we doing? Yeah. And she judged me for sending her an Apple pod link. And now out of spite, I only listen on Apple. Wow. I keep sending her links to Apple. She went, stop it. I'm not going to listen. Not clicking that link.

I didn't know that was judgeworthy. Hey, anything's judgeworthy. Anything's judgeworthy. It's the beauty of being human. Yeah. You can find fault with anything. But we do not felt the podcast, please give us five stars. Absolutely. And enjoy the show. And enjoy the show.

We're going to work for Jess and Rowan. In 2026, something new for breakfast. Do you know, Jess? I've got too bored. You'll get to know Rowan. What am I a piece of meat? It's covered in ink. It's going to be fun.

It's going to be all right. Anything could happen. Most of it probably will. Thanks. Fatty. And Rowan. You like what I did that? This is Jess and Rowers.

This is going to be good. Ah, good morning. Welcome to Tuesday. Rowan, I've done it. What have you done? I was complaining yesterday that she needed to get pieces and paper for home. That's right.

And I kept forgetting. I've had an alarm set for a week at 9 a.m. After the show, kept missing it, getting home being like, damn it, my printer's hungry. So today, set the alarm. for 530. Also, what do you do over there with it off the shoulder piece?

Oh, what do you think? We should I do to me. Too much. Too, too. Look that way. Too tempting. Maybe I didn't look this way. Shiger, how are you?

Good, how are you? Yeah, good, thanks. You don't like the shoulder. Oh, that's the most erogenous zone of, how do you feel that me? Rubbing it? I was going to think. Oh, my.

It's not. I'm just tickling it. No. Oh, you know. I want you to be comfortable in the workplace. You know how you do the... Tickles? Oh, listen.

Comfortable in the workplace. Someone throwing themselves or something like that? Very comfortable about it. I try to do the arm, tipples. Throwing a bit of shoulder. No. You will like this. Well, with the news...

Sorry. The porn block. You get you through it where you can. Maybe that's what it is, bro. Were you? Were you looking for shoulder on Porn Hub, were you? Yes, that's that better? Yeah, if they've got both shoulders out, too much.

Too much. Leave something to the imagination, ladies. You'd have to cover it up. How does this make you feel? Ah, worse. Oh. Whoa. Ankle.

Slow down. You'll take us up here. Oh my God. We're in the Middle East? No, I'm allowed to drive. Okay. Yeah. And vote and have more.

Absolutely. Back to the tickles. I tried to lose it the other day. I just do it. Stop it, you idiot. Yeah, I can't imagine your technique was great. I was... Were your heavy fingers?

No, subtle and... And light. But without warning, you've never done this in your four-year relationship. Well, that would take someone off guard. And then I think I did it again. She punched me. I've told you the little girl now,

the two-year-old in my life. She demands tickles every night. The sweetest conversation I've had with my husband, though, recently. He pulls me aside the other day and he goes, can you teach me how to tickle? Because Lucia keeps saying I'm doing it wrong.

So even she isn't happy with his technique. So I had to give him a tutorial. One had to tickle her arm back. Arm and back. One time she said belly, but that lasted 20 seconds. She goes, I don't like it. And rolled over to the back. The back is superior.

Belly. No one likes their belly being tickled. Especially not a ginger cat. Don't never do it to a ginger cat. A ginger cat. Yeah, you know, big fat cats. Yeah. You start rubbing their tummy.

They'll get you. So specific. I've never tried. Most cats actually don't like the tummy. Really? But it's the softest of the fur. It's nice to touch. I didn't realize you were such a cat.

That guy thought you were a dog guy. You can't be both. No. I'd love to have a cat. No. I would love a big, I would love a big, fat, like British blue thing that is so massive that it can't meow. It's like the length of your torso. Yeah.

Did you grow up with a cat? Three, all the ones. They're three cats. Blue cat. A British blue, they're like the Cheshire cats. You know. Oh, big smiley guys. Yeah, yeah.

And they don't meow properly because they're so massive. They look a bit like they've been smashed in the face with a frying pan. It's the pug. It's the pug. It's the pug of the cat world. Not the ones that look like they've put the whole mouth caved in. They're inverted. Yeah, not those ones.

They're cute, though. Anyway. To each they're wrong. All right, well, I just wanted to brag about my pink panthering the paper. But Rowan's really taking us around the world here. Been on air for two minutes. Why'd you admit to stealing office supplies? I thought Rowan would be proud of me.

Like, look, I got it. A victim was crime. Is it? I would just take it. Left my fingerprints all over the office, though, because I didn't know where the paper was kept. Then I saw it all next to the printer. One step, why you're just taking it out of the printer?

There it is. Well, I was going to do that. I thought, no, that's screws babbs. Who's about to print all our sheets for the show? Yeah, that's true. It depends on what printer. Oh, true. At least it's wrapped and you can take it now.

Yeah, exactly. It's like a little present. Yeah, good. Anyway. Big show coming up, guys. Massive. As you can tell, the porn update is real, and we are all pent up. We're tickling, we're looking for shoulders in the wild.

You know, and I nearly flashed you today. When you pulled in, remember I owe your one? Yeah, you showed me your bum. But not the rags. I thought, I know. It was not nice. Imagine that. You were riding at the same time this morning too.

Well, I was 20 seconds earlier, and I saw Rowan's car coming up. I said, I could do it. I said, nah, this isn't the week. I'd have to go, hey, you know, it's... What was that string? I remember we go, hey, Dad. Can you have a chat to Jax real quick? It's inappropriate.

Yeah, I've got straight on the GM. Mike, man. That would be... And she's still in paper, Mike. Still in paper. That's two strikes. That's two strikes. He goes, yeah, but wrong.

She's on the road, so she can take it to your life. Yeah, she can take it. That's right. Babs is blog. We're doing that today. Blog or blog? Blog. No, we don't.

Sorry. Three eyes you just got from her. She's behind me. I can't see her. Good morning. No blob. Just blog. Just blog.

Fantastic. Hey, you might get banned on a flight. We're going to talk about that next. How to get yourself banned. Yeah, if you don't want to fly again. We don't say bomb and you also don't do this. That's right. And you don't say hi to your friend, Jack.

This is Jess and Rowan. There's an airline based out of the States. United Airlines, you might have heard of them before. Well, they are doing something that no other airline is doing, but I can see it catching on Roro. Okay. And I have a feeling this is Tar-Row. not just punks, but parents as well.

They are amending its so-called contract of carriage, which is the contract you enter with the airline when you bought a plane, all right? It's basically a code of conduct. Updating it. Always good to update policies. It's always good, you know. Air travel's been around since the 40s. What was the first commercial?

I thought it was like 60. Oh, well, first commercial. Commercial fund. It was when everyone was doing it. Yeah, I don't know when the Wright brothers first took flight. 1914. 14. Well, that's what that first commercial.

Oh, damn. The first flight was 1903, so about 10 years later. God damn. I thought 60s. Whoa. That's amazing. So, yeah, this wasn't a thing back then because we didn't all have devices that make a lot of noise. United Airlines has said it reserves the right to remove anyone.

I don't know how you do that in mid-air. I don't know if they strap you in a parachute and chuck you out of the window. Who doesn't comply with their new rules. potentially banning them from flying on United in the future. If you are listening to music, maybe a little bit of Fetty Wop. Loud and just like obnoxiously. If you're throwing social media or watching videos without headphones on. Good.

From out of the plane, then. Now, originally when Shiger guy brought this across my desk, I thought, who's not doing that? Have some etiquette. And then I remembered my last flight with the two-year-old Rowan. She doesn't quite like headphones on her giant toddler head. Pickhead. So we had to listen to Bluey just off my laptop.

Bad, bad. You get off the plane. Get off the plane. Yeah, the eight people at the point in would have been really annoyed at that. That's almost as bad as saying bomb. Well, you know what's funny? The contract of carriage, nothing about the mention of bomb or faking bomb noises. The difference is that's a federal. thing. They all walk on and go, you say bomb, get off. Is that the Air Marshal getting involved?

Whereas this is just the United Staff being like, you're being disrespectful, your band. Well, I think if you're in the air, the Marshall's coming in and going, hey, can we talk? Flashes the badge. But if you're still on the ground, you say bomb. Are they martial people? Is it just an American thing or is that an Australian thing as well? Like on a Jet Staff? Yeah. Could there be a martial? Oh, yeah, yeah, to Bali, definitely. Oh, because we're idiots and get drunk planes.

Australians are idiots. Are I going to get a Marshall tap me on the show? because my blueie's too loud off the laptop. I think you just get a flight tenter going, hey, can you end it off? Do you know one time when I was coming back from Europe, solo trip, I just was sat next to another solo young lady traveller, get chatting, share and war stories, flight attendant came over and said, ladies, you're disturbing the rest of the plane.

Oh, you loud. Please pipe down, charging. What are you talking about, though? Oh, just, you know, our various conquests across Micanos. This is Jess and Rowan. The Girl Scouts Truth. They've got a little bit of buzz from setting up their little cookie stall outside the marijuana dispensary. Oh, fantastic.

This is the headline that shy guy said, this might be the best story of the week. And it's only Tuesday. They're like Girl Scout cookies. Yes. The ones we see, I didn't actually think Girl Scouts were real because I only ever see them portrayed in sitcoms and Hollywood movies. But it's a real thing, yeah? Yeah, and they are like the troops over there. I don't know, how you do the hand things.

The chipmunks. Yeah. Or whatever. Whatever they are. I'm doing Star Trek. I just did two fingers. Like I owed someone or something. No, that's, um, that's Hunger Games, what you did.

Is that? Yeah, no. Ting, ting, however they do it. What are they blowing? Sorry. That's the mocking, mocking Jay. Oh, the mocking Jay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's very section one of them to be selling cookies. We honest. But also, what are we talking? Age bracket. Do you have that? They're Girl Scouts are what? Between nine and ten? I would say.

Yeah, maybe seven to 11. Yeah, maybe like upper primary school. But it's legal. These are genius little girls who have gone, who will be a captive audience that we can sell to? I mean, it's legal in New Jersey. It was legal since 22. Oh, okay. They can do it.

I mean, it's there. So you can just go in and buy weed, I guess, there. Fair enough. So they thought, let's park ourselves out the front. And the owner of the shop, pumped. Pumped. He was pumped. This is the thing.

Do we think this idea, genius idea? dear, came from an entrepreneurial eight-year-old or a parent, who went, I want to win the regional division that my girl scout group is the highest earners. Where should we go? No point going to a supermarket area. No point even going to a playground. A lot of parents bring their own snacks. Who will fork out good money for our thinnments?

I think there's two types of people. There's the dad who goes, let's go and let them set outside the weed shop. And then everyone else goes, great idea, let's do it. And the other one, Dad goes, let's set up the weed shop. And all the parents go, that's so dangerous. Let's not do that. So at least, hey, it's more of an applause for the whole troop. Absolutely, because don't they raise money for us to inject back into the troop so they can do excursions and they can get better stuff for the community?

These guys are just absolutely cooked. And they're like, how much are they? No worries. I'll take five. So if they set up, you brought up the gym. Yeah. If they had set up outside your gym, you get hungry up. for a workout, would they have got a captive audience in Uncle Roro?

Well, no, if they'd set up outside Guzman last night, they would have got a massive sale from me. Guzman, but aren't you full from your burrito? Oh, do you need a little treat? That's dessert. That's dessert, bro. Oh, you'd get a dessert. Oh, I wouldn't be able to help myself on.

Okay. Yeah. So there's another opportunity for the girls'cals. Although, are we still doing Girl Scouts in Australia? I have not seen the Girl Scout cookies anywhere. What do we do? You still won, Babs? No, never was.

You never were one? No. I can see you. being a girl scout cadets cadets is a thing here oh were you a cadet no i thought that was a bit lame no offence don't get the cadets offside bro they're like upstanding members of the community scouts is a thing it's still a thing but it's used to go to jam brew whatever they go out into like the woods and camp and stuff no there was always a thing when i was going up there when they did scouts once a year all went to jambaroo whatever the hell that was yes they do the camp thing

Seeds a thing. Yeah, they do orienteering. Sounds awful. Sounds like a cult, man. Stuff like a cult. Now, the more I get older, I just think it's a cult. Oh, but it's nice. You know, how are young people learning out of time knots these days

unless they go to cadets? YouTube. This is Jess and Rowan. Now, people are saying it's a really hard watch. To watch the Lord of the Rings. Oh, my God. Is this an attention span thing, Rowan? I understand their long movies, but they are epics.

There is eight reasons here. modern viewers sometimes struggle to fully sink into the experience. And let me tell you, I have highlighted all the ones that I disagree with. Eight out of eight, you disagree with. Now, you and I go, L-O-T-R, we are big fans. Hit me. First one, the movies are very long and require a lot of time in one sitting. It's a good movie.

Takes a while to get through it. I get it. Shut up, move on, right? Oh, my God. You don't like it? This era we're living and we can't settle into anything. Agree. Some of the early digital effects look dated on modern screens.

They actually don't. I watched it the other day. It still looks great. Did you watch it the other day? Fantastic. You know what's dated? The Santa Claus with Tim Allen. You want to see some outdated animatronics?

Don't watch that. That looks dated. The serious old-fashioned tone can feel distant to today's audiences. This is how a story should be made, guys. This is a proper movie. If you can't follow along, turn it off. Listen, is this person advocating. because I know we're back in the era of the ROMCOM,

but not everything can be a ROMCOM. Because in a world full of rom-coms, and nothing is ROM or com. It's because the film speaks in formal language and relies on mythic stakes. Guys, expand the brain a bit. Expand the mind. Large parts of the story focus on traveling,

which slows the pace. No, guys. The Gollum, Frodo, it's really important. It is important. They don't fly to Mordor, you idiots. Sorry. focuses on traveling. Some of that scenery, it was filmed in New Zealand, we all know that,

is some of the most spectacular cinema you'll ever see. I'm slow the pace they're travelling. Guys, they have to go all the way to Mordor to drop the ring in. That's the whole point. The premise of the story is the quest. Guys, the movies are travel. Peter Jackson couldn't have got three movies, and who wrote them, Tolkien.

He wouldn't have got all the books. J-R-R. He knows what's up. whole idea is the journey. It's not about the destination. These are horrid. Who wrote this article? Name and shame. It doesn't say in here. Yeah, Babs is trying to protect the anonymity and I respect

that. The formal old style dialogue can feel hard to connect with. Well, you clearly aren't intelligent. Oh, sorry, six, seven wasn't in Lord of the Rings. Sorry about that, guys. Oh, no. The take of the hobbits to six, seven. Shut up, morons. What else have I got here? The clear good versus

evil. No cap, Gollum. I've got to. Oh, you got a skibbidi-out. You, flames, bro. Yeah, it's mortar. It's hot. The clear good versus evil approach leaves little room for moral complexity. Oh, mate.

I don't even have it. What do you mean? Frodo starts to turn. That's not a spoiler. The ring gets to him. That does have moral complexity. The movie's so late. Years of cultural overexposure have reduced the impact of big movement.

Yeah, guys, it's 20 years old. We know. What? They built a whole Hobbiton's dead that you could go visit. It is expanding every year. Made Elijah Wood. Come on, guys. Amen.

What's how you done since? Who cares? Nothing. He's Frodo. And the last one was knowing every story beat removes the sense of discovery and surprise. If this isn't entitlement at its finest, this is someone and this is the era we live in and we've fallen for it,

Rowan, rage bait. It's rage bait. You just go against something universally beloved. Throwing it out. And make up eight silly reasons. It's also the beauty of cinema. You just don't have to watch it. The Return of the King has an extended version, which is four and a half hours long.

Four and a half. I don't think I've ever seen that. I think I want to watch that. They're doing the local cinemas. They're doing a full marathon. I might go to the whole thing. Mate, let's block out the, do we need the whole weekend? I don't think you can do it in a day.

We're doing it on a Sunday. Oh, fantastic. So I won't see anyone under 26 there. Taking the Hobbit's for 6-7. Ha-ha. Oh, very nice. This is Jess and Rowan. Can you tell us what you could win on Friday at 9 a.m.

you contribute to the show this week. Oh my God, you also added to this prize. I did add, and Shaghan, I need you to remind me. Double past to Mel Robbins, live in Sydney, and we will sort the accommodation for you at Ridges, Darling Square, in the heart of Sydney. You're home away from home. And Jess is throwing in two Bloody Marys for you to enjoy at some point during that trip. Like two Amarito Sowers that are like the same price.

No, no. They're bloody Mary or they're nothing. Exactly. Eamaretto Sour, that's my husband's drink of choice. Gross. Oh, that's why we get along, man. You like an amaretto sour. What's with the egg yolk, froth, foam, yuck?

That's the fun bit, man. You know, in Bali last time I was there, I had a margarita sour, which is they made the same. It was like, it was like an amorto. With the egg white froth? I don't care for margaritas either. He loves them. At that charity thing I did on Friday, there was a big auction for a 10-person feast. And Lindel Lell and me mate, in real estate, she goes, I will throw in 10 margaritas.

And I yelled out, what if I don't like margarita? She goes, who doesn't like margaritas? I said, I don't like margaritas. I was a whole back and forth about margaritas. The reason I wanted you to mention the Mel Robbins is because we have had an unbelievable contribution and Jen's name is in the pool. Okay, great.

On 048-8-1069, we get this text from Jen. Hey, guys, I just really needed to let you know I was shopping on the weekend and a lady asked me if I wanted to use my store rewards membership on her order. So she was at the point of sale. She wasn't going to do the store membership rewards. She's turned to me in the queue, said,

excuse me, would you like to get my points? I laughed in that moment. She looked at me like I was crazy. So I thought, oh, I better just double check. Do you listen to Jess and Rowan? She went, oh my God, yes, I do. I know what you're talking about. We both thought it was so weird.

People wouldn't want to get freed rewards of someone. We're doing illegal stuff together, shy guy. Are you hearing this? Yeah. What illegal. Made my weekend. I've never met a fellow cooker in the wild. You guys are starting a movement.

People sharing their points. I said, Jen, where were you? Did you end up taking the points? It sounds like you did. I want to double check. She goes, this is even further, Rowan. It's one thing to just pull out your flybys and scan the card. They kissed?

No. Oh, sorry. They're in best and less. Oh, great. And at best and less, you don't get a little swipey boop. You've got to enter your phone number. So this woman has come up. Now they're homies?

She gives the best and less worker her phone number. So now she's in the draw to go in a monthly prize pool to win whatever the prize is for the month of March. I said, Jen, you've got to keep us updated. Six-pack out and east. Are you joking? It's good stuff for best and less. Can I be honest?

Kids stuff are best and less is killer. If she wins the monthly prize. Yes, because this kind cooker said, look, I don't need to sign up here. Just you do it. We're starting a movement, man. He wins the monthly price from someone else's points. I might be on board.

That's unreal. So Jen, please keep us updated. And by all means, you've got an interaction that happens in the wild. 04-8-8-106-9. I also did drop my mother some more points in the day, so I didn't even keep my consent to mum again. At Maya 1 again. Yeah. She's going to get a new scam pan.

Pan? And she'd be thinking of Roro. She better to send it to me, man. This is Jess and Rowan. Jess and Rowan's 10K alpha bucks on hit. Absolutely. We had a nine asterix yesterday. upon a review is probably more like an eight,

but nine is pretty close to ten. Absolutely, and we have yet to give away the $10,000 for 2026. And playing right now is Renee. Hello to you, Renee. Good morning. Hello. Renee, why do you want our money? Well, I've got a bit of a moat situation happening at home.

Okay, a moat. I mean, are you trying to defend against invading knights and whatnot? You've got a drawbridge as well? Be clear with the orcs. We live in Dora Creek and we're like just below the river level. So every time it rains, there's a nice pool out the front. Trying to raise the block or something. That's upsetting.

Yeah, we need some feel to raise it up. I get it. All righty. A moat is very fun though. It feels very bougie to have a moat around you, your abode. But let's get your 10 grand because, you know, not everyone wants a moat. We're going to Vowel Town to you today, Renee. You're going to work with the letter O.

Okay. All right. Your time will start after the first question. You're ready to rock? Ready. Starting with the letter O, Renee. We need you to name something you'd find in the ocean. Octopus.

A noun. Ocean. A male actor. Pass. A sunglasses brand. Oakley. A lunchbox snack. Oval Tini's.

A shape. Oval? A movie. Oceans 11. An international city A A band One direction

A five-letter word One Damn it Man, you are good That's seven, I was seven rather And with O as well That's impressive I reckon

Something went on there in your mind Because I reckon you were close to nine Potentially to ten Totally Normally like people listening I hear the first answer go quick, we're on. Amen.

And if they get noun, verb, adjective or adverb, they're sweet. Yeah, so. And she got noun. For me sitting here, I go, you get one of those right and you nail the first one. You're on. Amen. And then male actor, damn. Yeah.

Owen Wilson, Orlando Bloom. Yeah. We were just talking about Lord of the Rings. We were Legerless. What else is here? Oslo, again, Orlando. Orlando. Yeah.

For the city. Father the word wasn't, what did you say? Once. Once. Yeah. the buzzer two. Seven's pretty, I'm good with seven. I'm good with seven too.

You can hold your head up high, Renee, but you'll have to deal with the moat yourself. You're still moting around, man. You're still moating. Sorry, duh. I'll play you're at eight. That's fine, lots of winning. But you know what?

Some good momentum here, Rowan. Yeah, it's feeling fun. I'm looking in the log, making sure everything's sorted. Yeah, you've got some upbeat shoes. This is pretty out, we've been playing this. All right, next.

Babs's blog. She's coming in. She mad at her own people. What? This is James. And this is my blog. Commenced Operation Superstar Brass. Oh, Operation Commenced.

Slave. Consider it commenced. Yep. And watch out if you're in Gen Zane. She's mad at you. She's mad. I'm appalled. Disappointed.

Disgusted. Someone's been on the thesaurus this morning. Did a little bit of gusling. Go you. Nearly one third of Gen Z men think wives should obey. their husband. Really? Still doing that?

That's the reaction I had as well. Who's done the recent study then? So there's been a new global study conducted for... Global! Yep, it's global. For Women's History Month by King's College of London. So this is shocking new details about Gen Z's men's views on gender roles. Apparently, they surveyed more than 23,000 people and found that Gen Z men were the most likely

generation to have a more traditionally conservative view of marriage relationship and gender roles. And that's so... The younger one? Yeah. Really? Which is why I was appalled. I don't believe it. What do you think is fueling this?

Babs, you are in this cohort. I don't expect you to speak for the men. But what is driving this attitude towards relationships? They don't know. This is just, they can't make sense of it. It's kind of, I think it has to do with political things, but also, what the hell? What the hell?

Because it's funny to think that a Gen Z's parents would have, you know, been anti-a-lawful. of this. Yeah, well, it's actually saying, modeled maybe in the house. Yeah, that the baby boomers have shocked in and they're less likely now to look at it more traditionally as opposed to Gen Z. But is that maybe not how they were when the Gen Z was growing up? Do you know what I mean?

Now they've been educated themselves, so their views are shifted. But also it's saying that Gen Z women are accepting this as well and saying, yes, like I should obey my husband. Jesus. Do you know, I'm a civil marriage celebrant, so not religious. We don't do those traditional vows. Do you remember those vows? I didn't know that's what it meant.

I didn't know what that meant. Oh yeah, it means not religious. But you know, the old school vows of I will obey and respect. You don't do that anymore. Like that language has been eradicated for the most part. Well, not for Gen Zs, it sounds like. Yes, I had a celebrant friend the other day said, the couple said, we want the obey line.

Made a point of it. Fair enough. And she said, I don't do that. Wait. So you can either... Oh, wait. The couple wanted. And the celebrant said no.

And the celebrant said, no. And the celebrant said, I won't do that. Thank you very much. So you can either dump me and find someone else, and they sort of relented to her and I was so proud. But what, and they were young babes. Just say no, babe. Just say no, babe. Just say no, babe.

You know? Cook dinner. No. I don't know. Isn't everyone talking about this one jerk on maths as well? You've been watching maths. I haven't watched maths a little bit. I haven't been, but I'm seeing a lot of rhetoric around this one bloke,

and he seems relative... Tyson? Am I getting that right? With very misogynistic, old school views. Yeah. This sort of... My mate, Ben's a drag queen. Carla from Bankstown is the drag queen.

Amazing. Oh, yes. So Carla went at him and he went back and was like, are you a boy or a girl legitimately with me asking. She's like, are you an idiot? What's wrong? But people are so, like, people are morons, man. People are morons, but wrong, this is also a big of issue.

He seemed young. He's young. But this is an issue as well. when we talk about the influence for Gen Z. Yes. Where they're getting these ideas from, if not from their own households seen growing up. It's from who we platform on TV, online,

people who get clicks, people who get a platform. This guy was, they called him out and he was like, you know, well, I've actually had it with this experiment. I'm leaving. Because he didn't like his, the mirror being held up to him. He wanted the, like, the queer guys to, like, keep it behind closed doors. Like, word for word. Like, I don't need to see it.

And they guys were like... How is that on private? Time TV. We've got to stop it. You've got to stop it. You've got to stop it. Even though, yes, he's been booted, yes, he's been shamed online. It's kind of not funny anymore.

There is a portion of the public who would be seeing that going, well, he's, he's speaking my truth. Mass was funny, but now, like, all of the headlines are just so rage baity. Yes. And they're, look at us. Look at us. Because such a cash cow. Yes. Maths has turned from this great kind of funny show into this, like, how can we enrage people so much.

Totally. And now we're saying, and I'm not blaming maths. per se, but now you see stats like this for majority of young men. Like, where is it coming from? Exactly. And why are we going backwards? I can see why you're enraged. And as a single woman, Babs, this is to make you worried about like the kind of guy you're

going to meet and the expectations he'll put on you. A little bit. And your relationship. Yeah. Not to get serious, guys, but I just saw this headline and went, what the hell. It's serious. If anything makes you feel, that's what this segment is for, my darling. That's how you feel.

That's how I feel. Which you wouldn't cook for a man? Oh, maybe. Maybe if you were so in love and you cooked a wicked, like Jess cooks. Unbelievable lasagna. Thank you, Rowan. But that comes from love and wanting to do it, not from the expectation I should. Did you end up making those beef ribs?

I have not... And I hate it all. I'm sorry. This is Jess and Rowan. Now, obviously, we keep having these arguments, conversations, discussions, all about AI. Mm-hmm. And I like to say how good I am with AI. Same with shy guy likes to say how good he is with AI.

I'm happy to pull my hand up, say, not so good with AI. I keep sending videos in the group chat. And we joke. We joke about it. Yes, that's AI. I still can't get over. That's not Zendaya and Tom Holland's wedding picks. You got over 10 million likes.

Of course it did. It's Zendaya and Tom Holland and it's good. Can't believe that Garfield looking cat is break dancing. Oh, hang on. That's AI. Shut up. It was a kid and she, I thought, had mad skills. Nils it.

So one thing I've realized I have been caught more than once for this one feature on Instagram. AI. AI. Oh, no. If you're getting juped, we're no one's going on. It's kind of amazing. It's kind of crazy what they're doing.

So on reels, right, when you make a video, I've been making more videos, making more rules. I did one about my time with Kyle and Jackie. Obviously, they're finished, poor guys. Everyone who touched that show. How are they going to eat, right? But I was, I looked at it said, I've turned translations on. I didn't know what it meant, but I turned it on.

But meta AI translates my voice. into the different languages that the translator select. So it's not just if I'm watching from Italy, I can get an Italian caption. No, that's what I thought. That's exactly what I thought. I've seen that tab. You will get Rowan speaking Italian in Rowan's tone and it also changes my like mouth to match the new words. It's insane.

I didn't realize. Got a few little clips here, right? Okay. You got an English. I'll start with English. Sure. And then I've got Hindi. I've got heaps.

Hang on, hold on. So this is English, right? Just reflecting a bit on my time with Kyle and Jackie O, about seven, eight years ago. I was there as a panel op while they needed a new one. I think the plan was that I would... By the way, at Rowan, if you're going to try this at yourself, you can. Birds, very vocal in that. Birds are still the birds.

I don't think you can translate the birds. Now, this is the same, this is Hindi. This might not be the same bit, but this is Hindi. I think it was the way that I would have it. Sounds like you if you were speaking on. Guys, it's exactly my tone. I don't know if the Hindi's right, by the way, would have no idea. I've said, well, you're not getting comments from our Indian friends.

We're huge in India saying this doesn't make any sense. My issue, and you touched on it, I've seen the video, your mouth is perfectly alive. You know when you'd watch a movie on Netflix, you can change the language, but the audio is not synced to mouth movement. It's really, really off-putting. Your mouth has been manipulated to create the shape of the Hindi language. Portuguese. It's a job.

It's insane. Rowan, the destroyer. So I stragged the program. So they've encountered other person. I've been there for a second. But me asked about them. And it sounds slick. And like, this is Spanish.

It's like if you're stuck with Juolingo. Some of my major carcassas that I've been in my life. Good. You'd to know the birds are still birding? Birds haven't been affected. Don't be messing with the animals. But here's what Shiger and I say in off air. If it's a video made, like, in Italy, say about a brand new camera or something.

Sure. Buy an Italian. Buy an Italian with Italian. My cousin Federico. Say Federico made the video and he's speaking in Italian. But it's not got his face. I'm watching it in English. I wouldn't know.

You'd think it was done by Sun America. You would think it was done by an Italian dude speaking great English. Because you can translate narration. Perfectly. I'm okay with this A. This AI is good. Because it's just helping reach more people. Yeah.

It's the mouth manipulation for me. We'll put it on just... Yeah, I want you to see an example. It's the mouth manipulation. As I said, when it doesn't match the language, it's off-putting, but I don't like that they muck them with his lips. Netflix will do this soon, right? Yeah, so Netflix have a pattern on this, actually.

They haven't implemented it yet, but would you be more inclined to watch, like, a squid games or something if it looked like it was in? No, see, my issue is it was... was created in Korean, I will read, because I got no issue reading subtitles. But you still have the audio as Korean. Because it's made for, in Korea. But now we're, you know what my issue is? We're eliminating point of origins. I don't like that.

Now we're eliminating that you're an Australian man walking around a creek in Australia. Like, we're eliminating that. Now, everything's vague and vanilla. What about the Italian, Colin Jack O'Fans that are like? Who want to get that perspective? Yeah, they go, oh my God. They go, I wonder what. the ruiners do it. I remember what the ruiner would do it.

This is Jess and Rowan. Alpha. I tell you what, we could have a $10,000 winner at 8 o'clock. Not to be such a downer-roen, but we could have had a 10 since Jan 25 when we launched this program. Oh, now, hang on. Sorry, that's an ugly shade on me. You're better than that, I am better than that.

You're better than that. Sorry, no, you're right. That was bad. Sorry, shy guy. Have you noticed what's changed? She's done one of... No, she's... Now she's really... covered your shoulder and she turned into a bit of an asshole. So now maybe she's, see, I was free and easy. Well, I was pretty easy when I walked in.

Rowan had a goal on me for exposing myself. Sorry, I think you find that I liked it. Maybe a bit too much. A little too much, am I right? You're right, then he went to the kitchen, started smashing stuff. Oh, yeah. Perfect segue, go. I am in a bit of a mood today because my legs don't work like they used to before.

Okay. I asked if you wanted Fergie. I didn't realize you wanted Ed. No. It just came to me then. What's going on with you, Ro Ro, Ro. I am now on a... So I've been going on the gym heat,

but I've realised, after going to the gym yesterday on a new program with a trainer, I have been going to the gym like an idiot. I've been wasting my time for the last three years, doing absolutely nothing good. No structure. Just pumping through things here and there. This will do, this will do. It was a hard pill to swallow that when I started my little regime as well.

People going, what are you, what program you're following? Leave me alone. It's hard. You know what the heaviest weight of the gym is, Rowan? The front door. And I got through it. So let me live my life. Yeah.

And then enough time goes by and you go, I ain't seeing no results. I used to just tell people my, I used to tell people my biggest obstacle was like getting in the routine. It's like, sure, you're in your routine, but are you actually doing anything when you're in there? I thought I was. Not really. 100%. Found out, I've been doing donkey kicks wrong for six years. Yeah.

No wonder I don't have the glutes of the empress. Donkeys. My glutes. I've gone empress. You've gone donkey kit. My butt cheeks haven't hurt like this in years. And you've been doing butt stuff for a while. I've been doing a heap of butt stuff.

But wrong. But wrong, man. Lucky you now got your friend. Mike, is his name? Good old Mike. He just got out of his chair and groaned. Yeah, I hear the word Mike and I cringe. So Mike had one look at you and went,

let me give you some guidance. Well, Mike is online. So it's an online program. And I know how to do the exercise. I know how to train. I've trained for years and years and years. I used to be quite fit. Can you believe it?

guys, probably not. But. Have to go real far back on your Instagram feed. Oh my God. Oh my God. Someone, one of the guys I used to work with, quite literally, just posted a video of me working in the studio and it would have been 30 kilos later. And I didn't even realize I was in the video.

Not a joke. Yeah. Well, you're so thin, you can't even see them. Shy guy sent it to me and said, oh my God, look at you. And I went, oh, is he making a Mitch Turing joke? And I went, oh, no, I'm in the video. That's you. Yeah.

Mitch Tchuri and I do look quite a little similar. You do. But, but anyway, I'm learning. And then the hardest part about it is, guys, I've got to go back again today. Wednesday's off. I'll go back Thursday and Friday. Nothing puts me off more than being in pain. And my husband always goes, that's how you know you're doing it.

That's the point. I said, no, no, no, my life is enough going on. I don't want to be in pain. So every part of my legs hurt apart from the joints, which is fantastic. Oh, that's good. My calves hurt, quads hurt, butt hurt. Okay, so all south of the equator. All south.

What's Mike got you doing today? It's north of the equator. It's called a push session. So it's everything pushing away from the body. Okay, so now we'll hurt the upper half. Yeah, so now my whole body will hurt. And guys, like I said to Babbers started making a coffee. Fair enough.

She got there first. But I was like, can you move? Like she was like, I wanted to do it. Babs, never get in the talent's way. Don't you know that? Did I just start to go like, give me a go at it first? She went, I started to use the grinder and he came in with like the thing and like push me out of the way. Did he even shoulder you?

Yeah, trying to. Oh, yeah. And then I went, ugh, because she kept going. It was like, just get a well-targeted elbow into a glute. That'll buckle him at the middle. Oh, right now. And then I started smashing shit in there.

It was very dramatic. And then I went, oh, and it was quiet. Then I went, I'm in a mood today, babes. And then I grabbed a mug, and then my arm hit another mug, smash the mug. Apparently someone in the office's famous mug. Yeah, famous mug, who no longer works with us. But that was the only thing we had remaining of Maria.

Good morning to you if you're listening. Not anymore. Maria, I've smashed your mug. I also just want to bring the cookies in. Maria's munted mug. Babs being just so silly, immediately started to clean it up. And I respect, I appreciate you. I said, stop.

But then I said. I literally just jumped over and I went, I ain't touch on that. I said, actually, can you come back in, Bats? I can't even really bend over. This is Jess and Rowan. One of the great Instagram pages, Rowan. I might be funny one. I'm not sure if there's an I might be funny, two, three or four, but I might be funny one.

They posed a great question and it triggered thousands of comments. They wrote, I want to see the CEO of IKEA build a piece of their furniture. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And now people are piling on some other great ones. I want to see the CEO of Juriselle open a pack of their batteries. Oh, yeah. That is so hard.

A follow on from that was, I want to see the CEO of big scissors trying to open a packet of their scissors. Big scissors. Well, they've proved that. You just squeeze it and it opens. Yes, we learned that. I want to see the CEO. of any airline sit in the middle seat of the middle row.

Oh, I like this. Not just up at the pointy end. I want to see the CEO of any flour or sugar company open a packet without spilling it everywhere. Yes. To that, I'd add the chia seed people. I cannot open a packet of chia seeds without them going everywhere. I'm babbed with the big bags of coffee. I've sent you guys a couple, Rowan, what have you got?

I want to see the Planet Fitness CEO try cancel their membership. That's a great one. You trying to get out of a gym contract? I wouldn't have thought so. death certificates. Like if you say they're like, oh, such and such is dead. All right,

one of the certificate. Frodo and Sam Wiser's journey to Mordor was easier than canceling a gym membership. Shagall, what do you got? I want to see the CEO of HP set up a printer. Oh, howdy.

Perfect. How do you? The Wi-Fi? If there's no calling IT. Yes. Babs. I want to watch the Ticketmaster CEO try to buy concert tickets during a pre-sale.

Yep. Fantastic. One I'd like to add. This happened last night. My daughter and I were trying to enjoy an Arnott's teddy bear biscuit, but I got a little too excited and pulled the whole tray out. I'd like to see the CEO of Arnets put a tray of Arnett's teddy bear biscuits, even Tim Thames maybe, back into the sleeve.

It is impossible without ripping the packaging. I want to see Tim Cook, the CEO of Apple, try and sort out his iCloud account and how to sink his photos to his laptop. How do you do it? Explain the cloud, Tim. Oh, my God. No one can.

in it out. Yes, that's a great one. Yeah, I'd like to see, yeah, the CEO of Dropbox try and fire up all the files that have gone missing because you didn't pay your plan. Perhaps you got any CEOs. No, really put you on the spot there, mate. This is Jess and Rowan.

Alfa Bucket. Jess and Rowan's 10K alpha bucks on hit. And playing for all the glory at 8 o'clock is the great Renee. Hello to you, Renee. Hello to you. Renee. What brings you to the Jess and Rowan show today? I've actually got an opportunity to ring today.

Excellent. And what are you going to spend our 10 grand on? There could be so many things. But at the moment, my husband's just, I've just dropped him off at the hospital to have a knee replacement. His second one, so he's not working for a while now. So, yeah, it'll be all very handy. Would you say, Renee, he has a dicky knee? Yeah, absolutely.

With this, your letters D. Dave. Diffa, Dickey D. Diva, Dickey, me. Nice. Your time will start after the first question. Are you ready to rock? I am.

All right. Starting with a letter D, Renee, we need you to name a shoe brand. Pass. An action movie. Oh, pass. An international city. Dubai. An occupation.

Sentence. A reality TV show. Oh. Oh, pass. A car brand. Do I have to. A boy's name. David.

A five-letter word. Dingy. An ice cream. Oh, gee. Okay. Dingy, is that five? Is that a word? Is that slang?

What is that? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. It's not appeared on my word of the day. Try guys. Give him the, give him their, ooh, I don't know, face. So we'll go back to that.

Hey, Shrewbrand, Doc Martin's, Dunlop. You know, die hard, deep impact for action movie. Oh, I love deep in that. Yeah. Routed TV show, Dancing with the Stars, Deal or No Deal. Unfortunately, didn't get that one. We've got an OK from Dingy. Yep, okay.

All right. We are in Australia. We are in Australia. Yeah, that's true. But even the Cambridge dictionaries put it in there, so we're all good. It's in the Cambridge. Okay, well, good luck with the knee, my dear. Sorry, we couldn't get that to you there.

Well, that's what that's five. Four, five with you. Five. Five. That's okay? You know, that was a double Renee. Last time we had a double name play Alphabox, all Sarah's got banned from the show.

Yeah. Which have we officially released all Sarah's. Oh, all Sarah's are good to go again. We're good to go. Because I reckon there's a bunch of Sarahs in the wings being like, they haven't released us yet. Release us, Master. You're out of Alfa Bucks jail.

Yeah, you're out. You can do it. You can try again tomorrow. The Live the Dream code word. We'll do that just after 830 guys and more Alpha Bucks winning tomorrow, 7 and 8 o'clock. Next, we're getting judging.

Amen for a chance to win Mal Robbins tickets. Absolutely. So you get involved in the show next. Big winning. This is Jess and Rowan. What are you quietly judging people for? So much shit. We are giving you the platform now.

Rainy in, thanks. Sorry. We're giving you the platform now to loudly do it. Oh, yeah. But up until this point, maybe you just kind of roll your eyes and snicker. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't actually confront people about it. Yeah.

I don't know if BuzzFeed is targeting you, Rowan. But the first one on my list, men who. wear baseball caps inside. Oh, well, it's actually very bright in here, so I need it. Not only do you have a cap on right now, but it also says, especially when dining. Oh, yeah, I wear hats sometimes. You wear a hats in a restaurant. As long as it's a nice one, because you know, somebody's hats to like 150 bucks.

You're a $150 a hat. What if you buy one of those $500 Gucci hats? Do you wear that inside? I think it's a hat. And that is judgeworthy. Someone said, I judge, having another go at men, I judge half naked men out in public with their shirts off too far away from a body of water. Yeah, okay.

Put your shirt back on. When we did the filthy bingo the other night, see that man who, like, had his shirt open? He had a short sleeve shirt on and I was like, at a pub, but we're doing that. He had a few too many beers, though. Yeah, true. He was shiny. You're right, you're right.

No, that's how you can tell. He had the shame of lubrication. Groups of people who walk together on a footpath, three or four deep, Shoulder to shoulder, won't make room for anyone coming the other way. I will shoulder check you. That's a good one. Right, to this person. I'd like to add on to that at the supermarket where two friends have bumped into each other with their trolleys and they're just chatting in the aisle.

Bash through them, guys. What are we doing? Yeah, bashed them, guys. Now, see, me being so anti-confrontational, I walk around. What you could do is you could accidentally hit them. Oh, sorry, guys. I'm big for that one. Are you doing trolley into trolley?

Yeah, oh, sorry, guys. Oh, my bad, sorry, guys. I'll be chatting in the aisles, guys. It's on purpose accident. Go in front of the milk where it's a plentiful area. Yeah. Someone said, people who don't know, I feel targeted for this one. People who don't know how to hold a knife and fork,

I always get pulled up because I allegedly have them in the wrong hand. Oh. My brain thinks you should put the fork in your dominant hand, whereas my husband and dad always go, no knife, which is doing more, like. Yeah, yeah. powerful movement should be in the domino hand. I disagree. Fork is doing more.

That should be in my right hand. Your fork is doing more than the knife? Yes, of course. It's coming up to my mouth. Over and over and over. But the knife is giving you the appropriate amount you want to put in your mouth. I appreciate that, but I think fork doing more. Who do you think is the hero of the cutlery draw?

It's the fork. Well, you can use a fork for more things, but if you've got a fork and a knife together... You're saying knife trumps fork. Yes. I'm quietly judging you for that silly opinion. I think we have... I think we are both currently judging you. Would you like to add something?

Anything you're quietly judging people for that you would like to loudly proclaim? I think I loudly do it anyway. But I think if I'm at the cafe and I hear you go, maybe just a little bit of caramel. I think, I hate you. I think, what are you doing? All right.

You're going to judge my husband. He likes a little bit of honey. Can I have a cappuccino, a little bit of honey. It's no good. But you judge milk drinkers anyway. You know what? I do, but whatever. whatever floats your boat.

But if you need caramel in it, get a milkshake. Just get a milkshake. Back to the milkshake conversation. Get a milkshake. Shagai, one of the judges people I've ever met. Yeah, that's true. What are you quietly judging people for? If you have the slightest graze or scratch on your car, worst driver ever.

Well done, Chagherg. And it could have been from a trolley. It could have been not even your fault, but I'd get it fixed. You are judging. Don't look at my rims. You would hate my rims. already. I've got a bad, I've got really bad depth perception. So you know when you drive into like.

Not this new car. The current one? You've been scratching the BMW rims? Every car I've returned. We're here to get the GM on. The rims and no one's told me off and I'm waiting. Oh, they'd be talking about it. They know.

They know. But those new BMW beautiful. It beeps at me and I go, oh, you're being so sensitive. But the mirrors go down to show you the gutter. Oh, I hate that. You should use that. I need to see. But it's not reversed.

I think you do need to see it. No, I think you do. It's not in reverse. It's going straight. That's even worse. You know, when you're going into specifically, there's a shopping center. You go through the boom gate, but it's almost got a... An island.

An island show. I know what they are. People hit them all the time. I start swerving too soon. Every time. Just been rimming it hard. So, so unfortunate. Are you judging me?

Yes. Well, I judge you before the strategy. Black rims too, aren't they? You can see. So they're much harder to fix. People who reverse slowly as well, that's another one. Like if you're reversing to a car park. You're not be careful.

You're reversing into traffic or something. They'll be careful. No, but there's a speed to do it at. And you do it a bit slower some mornings. I've got an enormous rant about people in car parks. We should do that tomorrow, actually. All right. 131060 or 04-8-8-18-106. Now, what are you quietly judging people for?

Randoms, friends, family, maybe. I'm a little bit better with the honey in the coffee because the honey is natural. Oh, that's nice for Angus. But I still think, just drink a coffee, bro. But caramel, no. 13, 1060. What are you quietly judging? Take your Coles next.

This is Jess and Rowan. We are talking about what are you quietly judging people for? There's a list doing the rounds I would like to add to it. Yep. When you pull up to the petrol boughs of Rowan and the car in front of you has obviously forgotten what side their petrol tank is on. Oh, yeah. And instead of correcting, they pay.

they pull the thingy over their roof. Oh. Oh, I'm judging you, sir. I wasn't thinking like that. I was thinking if they stop and they try and they try and reverse, they've gone in nose first. So they go further and come back around and go nose back. No, no, no, go out.

I start again. Both are bad, but I watched a grandpa pull it over his roof and I went, no, Grams. Granddad. Start again. Stand dad. Maddie, good morning to you. Good morning, guys. What are you quietly judging people for?

You got the platform to do it loudly. Yeah, right. I've actually got two. I judge people off. My first one is people that cannot merge in traffic. Absolute imbecile. Like a zipper, people, it's not hard. I know.

You shouldn't have your license if you can't. The second one is when you go to an airport and you are waiting for your bag at the carousel and people stand so close to the front that no one else can get their bag on. Amen. Amen. Maddie.

And also, like, when people stand up first as soon as you've been playing land. I know. I've had people hip and shoulder me to get, like, to the front waiting for the door to open. I understand you've got a connecting flight, maybe. Just can't be bothered. But you don't. So just wait. Hello, Gemma.

Hello. Gemma, what are you quietly judging people over? I'm quietly judging people for not basically recycling. Like, a cardboard box goes in the recycling. A tuna can at work. Brins it out first. It's not that hard. It's not that hard.

Gemma, do you judge if the box does make it into the recycling bin, but they haven't flat packed it, you know, like the reverse. Oh, yes, yes, yes. People could just chuck a whole box. You're taking up too much real estate. What about pizza boxes, Gemma? What are you doing with the pizza boxes? Oh, if they're clean, you can recycle them.

If they're really dirty, you cannot. Thank you, Gemma. It's not hard to learn. It's not hard to learn. That is the top one. People get tripped up on the pizza boxes. Absolutely. People like Shiger going,

It all ends up in the same beer anyway. In some areas, it does. You saw one video of that truck doing the wrong. And there was an ABC investigation. Hello, Jody. Good morning. Hi, Jody. What are you judging people over?

How you, someone is walking towards you and they're too busy got their head in their phones and not watching where they're going. Oh, Jody, you walk into them? Yes, I do. Yeah, you've got to do it, Jody. That's smart. With shoulders up and out. Get out of my way.

Yes. Particularly in car parks, people who do it in car parks. That's bad. Have a little bit of self-preservation. Although I'm driving a hybrid. It doesn't make a lot of noise. People don't hear me anyway. Hello, Shannon.

Hey, how are you? Oh, couldn't be better, babe. Judging. We're getting it off our chest. What are you quietly judging people for? So I'm not saying that your teeth have to be perfect, but please brush them. Okay. That feels targeted.

People who haven't invested in braces. I'm judging you. Oh, my goodness. No, like, you can have crooked teeth. I don't have a problem with that. I just want you to brush them. How many stinky breathed people are you working with in your family? that you feel that that needs to be everywhere.

They're everywhere. Husband? Always. Oh, brush it. Oh, the husband doesn't brush his teeth. I have a tic-tac at a minimum. Oh, brush it. Oh, brush it's not that hard.

This is Jess and Rowan. We're getting a lot of texts rolling in. Rowan, we're asking, what are you quietly judging people for? Some great ones. Sarah has got in touch. She said, hey, Jess, Rowan, shy guy and babs. How lovely, the whole crew getting name checked. I'm quiet.

judging people in business wear riding their bike to work. Like, you are getting sweaty in your work clothes and you're going to stink up the office. Just wear active wear and get dressed when you get to work. I think I have the backpack and stuff. It might be hard. I don't hate that one. Okay. That's the only reason I don't ride to work.

Not because I'm lazy. Mel has got a great one. I judge all the Ute drivers with their recovery tracks strapped to their Uts. Like, how often are you getting bogged driving to work? I put to you that they are just gibbets for utes. You just get some decorations on your yute. I see that too, and I actually do think that. I think why, but then again...

How much off-roading you're doing? Yeah, but maybe they do some, and then the time they take it off, is it time they go and they go... Ah, that's fair. Mel's judging you, you take it off. Nick Minot, bogged. And Miranda, I like this one. People that say something, instead of something. Expresso.

I put it to you as well. Three instead of three? Free. And can I ask you a question? No, it's ask. We know that. That's fantastic. Thank you for all those contributions.

Keep them coming. We are a judgy show and we're happy to be. Jess replies it all in the draw to see Mel Robbins are in Sydney. That's right. Sold out the last double pass in town. Plus a couple of bloody merry. This is Jess and Rowan. From New York City, that is somber, not Australia.

Shane Michael Booth is his name. Great name. Great name. At the right old age of 20, I couldn't have guessed that. Samba, what a man. Like, he'd be around for a long time, I think. He's got such depth for a 20-year-old. I didn't know.

I thought he'd be like 26 or 7. Much older. Babs famously, I mean, you've seen Samba live, but you have said you don't like a younger man. You'd like just a little bit older. But would you go Somba at 20? No. Oh, wow, man. Even though it's Somba.

He also is a bit of a string bean. Like, no offense. What does that mean? Wow. He mean he's a bit of a shy guy. Body-shaming. Wow. No, no, no.

She's just body-shaping. I said no offence. Body-shaping. I said no offence. I said no offense in the start. Well, it is. He's gorgeous. Come on.

Look at the way he's handling that mic. Yeah, imagine if that was your face. Shane Michael Booth. I like to learn the real names of artists. Yeah, okay. I do? I do. What I want to you know?

Karen Johnston. Whoopi Goldberg. Oh, wow. Amelia, no, Alicia Moore. Pink. Good, shy guy. Pink. Who else?

Peter Jean Hernandez. Bruno Mars. Very good, shy guys. I know this because you've asked me to Google these multiple times. Stephanie German Otter. Garga. That's Garga. Absolutely.

Okay. All right. Nicholas Coppola. No, you lost me there. That's Nick Cage, baby. I was going to say that. Oh, Nick Cage. No, you were.

I was. I was thinking Nick Cople. It's like a national treasure. I don't think so. And it's Nicholas. It doesn't matter. Oh, you said Cage? Cage.

I think he's a Nick Cave. I was like, that's for real needs. No, Nick Cage. No, I love Nicholas Cage. What about who's Jessica Cornish? No, no. I know that. Oh, I know that.

Oh, I don't know. It's not Jesse Jay. It's Jesse Jay. Yeah. Wow. Anyway, what I wanted to share with you, Rowan, is actually something I could have incorporated. into what are you quietly judging people for?

That's all right. I've been sitting on a nugget about my father. Sorry, I did smell in here. It's disgusting. We played that game a while ago. I think we ripped it off K-J. What's just sitting on? It's crumpets one time.

No, no, that was just playing the ones. What's in Jackie's mouth? Oh, I think we changed it to sitting. Oh, smart. But was that that game they played? Yeah, didn't want to run into the legal troubles. Yeah, I didn't want to get done for trademark. That's all right.

They're not on anymore. We can do what's in Jess's mouth in tomorrow. Oh, my God. What's in Jess's mouth on tomorrow. Why don't we do that as a layer of dips? Tomorrow we're dip and shy guy dibs, but what's the lolly in your mouth? Sure. Leave the dips to me.

Anyway, this nugget about my father has been so upsetting me for weeks, Rowan. I've only just calmed down enough to share it with you. Cool. Get your perspective. Yeah, I'm happy to give it. My father's mid-60s, man, and I'm just worried he's doing life wrong. It's hard to teach an old dog new tricks, but I can't fathom this is the way my father has become. Still going on about that lift in the house he wants to put in?

Hell yeah, the pulley system. So when he comes over and goes to the studio apartment, second story, he doesn't have to lift my mum's suitcase. How am I going to get it up there, Jessica? Angus. Work it out. 100, Zand. I'm struck to the dog, like a sled dog.

He can walk in a big dog, yeah. Like those donkeys in Mickonos. Sure. Anyway, we're at their house the other day, and, you know, it's getting a bit late. My mom's gone, it's too late to cook. Should we just get chicken and chips for the family? Smart. Is there anything better?

No, there's not. So my dad chuffs off, gets the order, comes back. He's feeding like seven people, all right? So he's walked in with a couple of bags. It looks like a good amount of food. Makes sense. For an Italian family. Yeah.

Start serving it up. Dad, where's the gravy? His response was, you didn't tell me you wanted gravy. You just get gravy. Thank you, Rowan. You just get gravy. Dad, you are 66 years old. Especially there's seven people there, even though...

Do you have to ask? You got to get the gravy, bro. You got to get the gravy. Maybe it is part and parcel of a chicken and chips order. I could not believe we were having the conversation. He goes, you didn't specify. Oh, sorry for not specifying the greatest part of the chips. He goes, I got the chicken salt.

I went, yeah, that's also stock standard. Who's getting normal salt? But he did not get gravy as standard because I didn't specify. And I went, I thought I knew you, sir. Maybe it's good. There is no greater role model in my life until this day. What did mum think about it? Oh, you know what she ended up doing, getting the grave ox out.

and making it. She got her fancy gravy boat. Whilst it's good, it's not the same. I want the chicken chop gravy. Oh, so put the Graveox in the gravy boat. In the gravy boat. And then she's lathering it on like we're eating a leg of lamb or something. I went, man, I appreciate you going above and beyond.

I would have rather sent Dad back to the shops. Because you know, people do chicken and chips. They do chicken really well. They also do gravy really well. Much better than the Gravex. Because the grave box, it doesn't matter how much my mum whisked that thing. I can taste the granules. Oh.

I can taste it. She goes, well, I'm not going to whip up a leg of lamb to get the juices to make the gravy. Well, do you love me? You could do something like that. You could do something. Why didn't you send your old man back out there to get the gravy? I said, Dad, gone. He goes, no, because then the chips will get cold.

I don't want to miss it. Take a bag with you and go get the gravy. Take some travellers. Who do you think you are? You know what? For that, bully system gone, not doing it. This is Jess and Rowan. The time may have just run out for your first co-board to help you live the dream,

but we are doing more co-boats today, guys. And into Carrie and Tommy. Amen. So you keep it locked. There's heaps of winning. We are, we're nearing the end of this. Carrie and Tommy are going to call the winner start of April. You might be thinking, that's a month away.

Hey man, time be a ticking. If you've been sitting on your hands thinking, ah, I've got plenty of chances. Time do be a ticking. Come on, it's already March. Let's go. Hasn't that flown? Truly. Well, we always know Jan's a ride off and now we're well into March.

Hands are right off into March. And we want you to live the dream for your 2026. So get the next code word, any opportunity. Just a Wi-Fi connection and hit.com. com. Wham, bam, thank you, man. We're doing shy guy dips tomorrow. He may or may not put one in his mouth and then describe what the mouth feel is like.

No guy's going to dip and then we do what's in Jess's mouth. Of course it's going to be the same. We need a new Monday game. Yeah, what's in Jess's now? We just rip it straight from Kyle and Jackie. No show anymore. That's good. Yeah, but you've seen the headlines.

They are now talking again. No show. Well, maybe we could do what's in Jess's. mouth until the show comes back. We'll never come back. You don't reckon. Every week, it's a different game that we stole from them. Oh, my God.

Every, what, can't, Jaggy? We're going to do five and ten? We're going to pop quiz. Can we actually do five and ten? That's fast. I love five and ten. Five and ten is a fast game. Well, now they're gone.

We could be the show that takes all their good stuff. So five in ten, because what are we currently doing with Alfa bucks? Ten in 30. And then five in ten. But these don't have to be the same letter. Yeah, they can be just five. Yeah, it's just categorisation, isn't it? But in terms of questions, speed.

It's just like video games, right? Like you go video games, go. Grand Theft Auto, Halo, Halo, Call the Duty, Marathon, Modern War Vets. You kind of help, though. Nah, that was a team. No, no, I want to say shy guy do it. Give me another category. Vegetables.

Carrot, broccoli. Oh, no. Cochlor. Worth at. I knew he would be worse at festivals than you were at. Peas. But also, you love peas. I don't know.

I love peas. You run out of time. That's good game. Let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, always often. We'll ruminate. We've got our meeting today. Tuesday is our meeting day. Oh, good one. All right. We're back tomorrow from six. Bye, guys. Bye-bye. That was the Jess and Rowan podcast.

Macca's Bistro Bernays, Angus Range, is here. Chef's Kiss.