Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - We are a punishment in prison

Episode Date: February 22, 2026

Has anyone on the team accepted a bribe? Jess recaps her girls weekend and we play Wordie-Okie possibly for the last time!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/jess-and-rohanSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Friends meal has landed at Maccas with one of six characters to collect. Here we go! Welcome to the Jess and Ron podcast. Hello everybody. Welcome to Monday. Oh, welcome to the pod. If you're listening wherever you are, this might be two years later. And a Wednesday. And a Wednesday.

Yeah. Welcome to the pod. It's a Monday here. But I'm getting a lot of, we are getting a lot of DMs. They're really enjoying the pod. Oh, they're fucking with the pod. And I don't know if that means, like our friend Tommy Cashar, who's getting way too much air time on this program.

I have to have to have a talk to. about this. Every time you mention him, he loves it. Oh, God. He grows an inch. I get a call. I get a text. You do. I'm the one mention him, but he messages you. Oh, the group chat. Love it. Brother, were you on the radio once? Don't you get it?

Nah, that's been so long ago. That's true. Anyway, what was I going to say? I don't know if like Tommy Casher, people are choosing to not listen to the 6 to 9 broadcast. Oh, yeah. Or, like, he could listen, but he

chooses not to. He opts for the pod. Yeah, yeah. Are people who are pod dedicated, choosing not to listen six to nine, they have their ability to but choose not to. Shout out to the potters, man. Or can they just not listen?

If you're pod on this regularly, can you please. I would just have to get in your mentality. Follow us wherever you can. Obviously listen to a weekly podcast. Yeah. Just rate the podcast. I listen to a couple of radio show podcasts who do breakfast.

Yeah. I need to listen to them on the pod because I can't listen to them live. Makes sense. You know what I'm saying? Please rate the show. If you're in there, you can do a five-star, do a five-star, leave a review. And then DM us and just tell us the psychology. Yeah.

Just curious, what you're doing? Send the five-star. DM is proof. Maybe Jess will send you a voice note or something. I also love to know how far back you're listening. Like is someone going back, you know, to Jan? Oh, yeah, yeah. You know what?

I missed the early days of Jess and Rowland, even though it's still early. Like week one. We're getting a couple of texts being like, hey, new to the show. I'm like, to be fair, we've only had 22 shows. So are we. We've, so are you. So are you. I've been in this chair for eight years.

Hey, it's a new show. It is a new show. All history has been wiped. Yeah, apart from that rice cooker's, uh, yeah, that's right. But have you noticed how it's kind of developed into just cookers? Yeah. Like our weekly prize is cooker of the week.

You know, things have developed. Things change. The roots are there. Things change. But the fruit has almost changed of the tree. Blossomed. Blossom differently. Shy guy, you, I just looked up by reviews.

There's not too many of this. I'll leave one. I don't know her name, their name, his name. It just says four stars. So good. Four? Yeah, out of five. I've been a fan of Rowan since his time with Abby.

Oh, yeah, cool. And I'm a huge fan of him with Jess. And only four stars. That's our most recent reviewed last one was two years earlier. See, now that is where you want to have a conversation. Where is the other star? What are we lacking? What are we lacking?

Because you're obviously a podcast star. Because that's very kind. Maybe no mo now. Maybe that's the problem. No, Mo. What I'm hearing is big fan of Rowan, am I letting us down with the one star? Maybe you're the one star. Maybe.

You know what I'm saying? I'd love to know a little more. No name. Well, I think it's using Lincoln, Lincoln. Okay. You know who you are. Shout out. Would love some more information.

You listen on Apple Podcasts, so we can really narrow it. Wow. The data is incredible. How do you listen to podcasts? Spotify. Are you Spotify? Sorry, most people are. I do listen to when I want to go broadcast live.

too. I send a podcast episode. I thought my friend Carly also gets a bit of airtime. Hello, Carly. I sent a podcast I thought she might enjoy. And her biggest takeaway was Apple podcast. And I was like, how else should I have sent this to you? She goes, Spotify. And I'm like, oh, and I'm still an Apple pod. I use Apple. Yeah, she was really wigged out by that. Why do you use Apple? I just do everything. Forlossless. Oh, okay. Oh, that's smart. He's a one brand man. They just added video abilities. What does that mean? Podcasts.

There you go. So I can watch Mel Robbins, not on YouTube, but all. on the Apple pot. And they have like a word search. Oh, you have microphone, yep. Why throw to her if you're not going to turn her onto? It's just two in one finger, bang up. You could also hit your own off button. Oh, that's true.

No, no, don't put it on her. He's on the panel. Well, it wasn't also. He is the cat's father. What? I don't know. No one knows that. Anyway, what were you going to have your mother?

No, I was going to say, I think you can do that on Spotify too. I think you can. Yeah, you can switch over to video. Yeah, I don't know why you wouldn't use it. Spotify. I can't look at our reviews. I think that's just because Apple was around first as I'm stuck. I also thought Facebook would never take off.

I stayed with Myspace till the dying days. I am not an early adopter. What song was on your profile? Like the last song on your Myspace profile. Yes. Summer, summer by Justin Timblank or summertime. Summer. Summer Love. Great track.

Well, I thought so too. Can you go to slash Jess? Do you remember your username? It might have been Jess Farcioni. I don't think I've ever seen. Have you ever seen Myspace? Did you miss that? that? I miss that.

So you don't know who Tom is? Not found. Not found. I can't imagine I was Jessica Farciani. So if it's not Jess Farchian. They probably deleted them all. I think so. I feel like I've tried to find it before.

Justin Tim like bought it. I'm pretty sure. Off Tom. Why? Tom was everyone's friend on MySpace Babs. He invented my space. You don't know who Tom is? I don't.

Yeah. I missed that. 2001? Yeah. What was your song, Shaga? You could fully customize your profile. That's fun. And have a song playing.

I think I had a Pires at the Caribbean theme as my layout at one point. Oh, as your layout also theme song? You remember your layout? No, the song would have, I would have changed it every two hours. I had Wonder Woman, and I remember, you remember you could customize them. So you could either do a preset one. Yeah. I remember spending hours on Microsoft paint.

Yeah. To get all these Wonder Woman, like a montage. And I remember you used to go to websites and get, like, the code, and you'll paste it into their About Me section. And then it would drop, like, make them. mouse a different color or something. How controversial was your top friends? Well, I never had that many friends on it because A, mom didn't let me because I had to be like she had to know who the people were or whatever.

Oh my God. Did that just say J-Far Gianni? Like J-A-Y? That is feeling familiar to me. Is that you? Try J-A-Y-O-N-E. Yeah, so that one's J-FARge. Okay.

That's why I clicked before. But was that blank? Yeah, there's only one connection. So I can't be here. No, no, I had a... I reckon they were gone. That was my life, Micebred. I reckon they full on just wiped it.

Yeah. Jay Farchiani. J-A-Y, that's feeling very familiar. Did you have Bebo Babs? The heck is that? Okay, no. It was like Myspace. No, my first, like, social media app would have been Facebook or Instagram.

I think it was Instagram. What? Not even Facebook? No. Holy doly. We got Instagram first and then Facebook later. Not you, Rowan? You gone too.

Crazy. I think everyone's going. Yeah, do you remember having drama with your top friends? Did boys fight about that shit? No, I remember that was drama, definitely drama. Always drama. All right, we'll enjoy the pod, guys. We've got with Jess and Rowan.

Jess and Rowan. In 2026, something new for breakfast. Do you know Jess? I'm all about Wii Wu methods to help yourself. You'll get to know Rowan. Hot, Pawnee Happy. Yay! It's going to be good, it's going to be fine.

It's going to be all right. Anything could happen. Most of it probably will. I guess I need to enter the mind of a man. Please enter me. This is Jess and Rowers. Good morning, welcome to the week. How are we guys?

Feeling good. Great, looking good too. Are you yellow? Thank you. So, weo-woo. Our fabulous promotions manager, Danielle, who is not you into the office still 9 a.m. She's already here, this amazing go-getter of ours.

The kids are annoyinger. But we've come around, I've come around the corner and she goes, hello, your little ray of sunshine. And I must say, what a great way to start the day. Okay. Being called a ray of sunshine, he'd be yellow. Extra tan, too. Some more sun on the weekend.

Had me girls' weekend. Did she do the fake tan? No, no. Cup is full, even though nothing healthy about a tan. Tan in a can. Better. Don't get melanoma. But obviously, chemically.

So you can't really win. It's hard, because I think you're meant to, like you're meant. Like you're meant to have some... Vitamin D. And some sun on the front, side, back. And perineum. What? And that's that in between the...

Yeah, sunning. They're sunning for the testicles for gentlemen and sunning for the perineum for ladies. Allegedly, boost of energy and oxytocin. Right up the middle. And that's what me and the girls did all weekend. Obviously, just sun our perineums. Go you.

So it would have to be bottoms off then. Obviously. On the balcony. Obviously. When the girls get together, there's no bra. obviously. Oh, good-a-girls, time to sun the perineum. When it's turning it on the weather, I thought, ladies,

but that's where you've got to be careful. You can't get distracted because if you're in the sun too long, perineum can get toasted. Do you imagine a sunburnt perineum? Forget about sitting comfortably for a while. Then it like stabs. 45 seconds max. 45 seconds max.

That's all you need for the energy? All you need. Really? Wow. Because allovira there. A bit stingy. Oh, really. Yeah.

Everything can be stinging. You've got to be careful. But no, my cup beeth full. Oh, good. Rowan, how are you and how's your cup? Cup is, I think, full. I need, or standing you off here, I need probably a good half a day to myself.

Amen. I need a good half a day to myself to just really refill it. Yes, my cup is full, runneth over, but my battery... Yeah, low. Low, because obviously four of my oldest friends together for 72 hours. It's a lot. It's a lot.

Not chit-chat. Great. The voice is feeling a little strained, but that's okay. Do you sound a bit strained, that? A little strange, yeah. But I didn't notice until you said it. Our group, this group, where we call ourselves the United Nations because we all come from different corners of the globe.

Ethnicity-wise. Right. But the one thing we all have in common, shouters. We're loud. Shout-out. We're boisterous. Oh, toys are a bit quiet. But she's got a shout to be heard at all.

So she got a shout. She got to shout, you know. Imagine you guys in the pool, shouting. I know, and then there's a band playing a little bit of, you know, Shania, into Abba, into a little bit of Olivia Dean. Is that funny? I mean, I can't control myself. Just sent me a video and they were playing Dancing Queen.

Yep. And then as soon as I went on my Instagram afterwards, about four different people had some of DJ friends down in the big smoke, had about four different videos with different Abbas. And one of them was like, why are people still requested Abba? It's like, we just spoke about this last week. Everyone loves Abba. Everyone, bands are doing Abba because one of the band was finished, Rowan.

DJ, one of your kin, popped up, first song, more ABBA. See? Not even remix. No. Just straight ABBA. What did you do?

Gimmee? No, the band had done Gimmy, so good on him for pivoting. I think he did Super Trooper. Oh, really? Which is not one of the fast ones. Started up with Super Trooper. Super Trooper. Very interesting.

I don't know if I would have done that. It was like, oh, I've got a pivot. They play Dancing Queen and Gimmy Gimmy. Oh, my only two, Abyss, what am I going to do? Shit. Panic. They are the two bigies. Super Trooper.

That's a good. Or the 19-year-old's like, no, crap. It did kind of kill the dance law. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. You've got to be careful. It will kill it. DJ's hard.

Thank you. I wanted to text you being like, it's not that hard, is it? Just put on good songs. But that's the whole thing. Well, that's 80% of the thing. Put on good songs. Read the room. Sometimes I barely even mix them in together.

I just one finishes. The next one starts. As long as it's good. Hey, it's a good song. We're a simple creature. You don't need it. Human beings. We just need a good beat.

Yeah. Not everyone needs to be diplo. Like, let's go, guys. Not everyone needs to be Diplo. If we were all Diplo, no one would be Diplo. You know? Morning, shy guy. Morning.

How are you? Famously, not Diplo. You look a bit of Diplo. You got a little bit of Diplo vibe. Do you see in that show where James Van der Beek, rest in peace is a great man. Farley. He played Diplo. What would Diplo do?

The show was called something? No, what's that? I am familiar with Diplo. You look, yeah, but he's to his show. Vannebeek was playing Diplo in the show. And you kind of look like someone who would. play Vanderbeek. Oh my God, that's a full inception thing.

I'll take that. What does Diplo, are you saying he looks like, Diplo or he looks like Vanderbeek? Well, Van derbyc both. I wouldn't know Diplo if I fell over him. Oh my God. He doesn't look too bad. Shy.

Simp, right? I'm going to put it on the Jess and Role on Instagram. Shy guy has millions and millions of dollars. We have found Shy Guy's doppelganger. Lots of H-T-H. What's that? Human growth. Almost.

He's got all the money for all the stuff under the sun. He's almost 50, isn't he? He's 47. Yeah, and he looks like he's 32. Diplo was denied, Diplo was denied entry to a yacht party he was DJing once. That's a bad day. Good morning to you, Babs.

Good morning. How was your weekend? Very busy, but very fun. We will catch up with the weekend. We've got questions about your weekend. There was quite an exciting. She started to say Ronde breakfast exercise. And I was like, stop talking.

Save it for on air. We will have an update. We were inundated on Friday, Rowan. Cookers wanting to know what's going on. Trust me. Babs and the car salesman. We've all wanted to know. We've got an update after 7 o'clock this morning.

Next, these people needed to prove a death. And the way they did it was very good. Very good. They've taken it to the endth degree. This is Jess and Rowan. As I've said, multiple times in our short tenure together. I don't want to just be about entertainment. I'd like to also have a pillar of education.

Sure. All right. A lot of misinformation out there. So let's be, I'm not saying we're not going to also house a bit of that. But let's clarify some things for some people. Good one. The latest education comes out of South Africa. Right.

And just in case you have an experience this week where you need to prove one of your relatives is dead in order to claim some life insurance or payment or maybe. maybe access the savings they have in the bank. How best to do it, all right? They never want to give you the money. It's always like, well, you go, right. Even getting out of a gym these days is hard. Oh, God forbid.

Read the T's and Seas, team. Read the T's and Seas. Please go on. A family in South Africa in the region of Stanga, possibly Stanger. It's about five hours from Johannesburg. Thank you, Shogar. I looked it up. I don't even see him Google.

What a sis. I looked it up when I saw the other guy. The Brom James with the layout. Excuse me. Me? I just thought that might help context. Welcome to the party. Michael Jordan.

Anyway, continue. No, no, you tell the story now. Just, mate. That's the only thing I know. Pass the sheet to I got. That was wrong. I've worked with this young man for two and a bit years. He was waiting.

He's waiting. That was the best contribution of it. You were literally, bro, you're in the bushes then. You're in the bushes. He's going. Five hours. You know what these guys don't know about me? I'm an expert.

I'm not an expert. I'm not an expert. but does know where it is. Because when I saw the article and sent it through, I thought, where's this place in the world? Because I thought maybe it's here. And to be fair to you, where did you find this information originally? Was it like the Johannesburg Post or something?

South African Times or something? Because it doesn't actually say South Africa anywhere. Rowan, I did my due diligence, looked up the bank. I went, where's Capitech Bank? And it said, well, that's a bank branch, like Commonwealth or NAB, in South Africa. I didn't go the further and go, well, Stanga or Stanger. You looked up that. I actually looked at the bank in that suburb.

Unbelievable. You're taking out a home loan in Stangar. He knows the manager. Looking at the rates. A family, sadly, lost a relative. And they wanted to get the savings that this bloke had in the bank, all right? But the bank said, yeah, no worries. You just need to prove that this family member is dead.

We can't be having family members walk in being like, yeah, yeah. Give us some money. Give me all the money. And the bloke's still alive. Now, unfortunately, they didn't go to the level of detail by saying, we just need a death certificate. Right. They just said, you need to prove he's actually dead.

Because a death certificate would do that. Absolutely. But logically, they went, well, how do we prove it? Let's bring in the body. So the family has walked this guy in weekend at Bernie style, our dead body into the bank. Leading to a dramatic scene and temporary closure. of the branch.

So is there any information there, shy guy, you probably know, of when he died to when they walked him in. Now that, I'm going to have to defer to shy guy. Deferred to shy guy. Because are you asking level of decomposition? Yeah, because it's like a day, then they stink, right? Because I've taken some creative license here and said they walked him in. He was in a body bag.

He was in a body bag. Because they've walked the body, well, dragged him in, maybe. You can drag him in like he's an old rug. Don't know how heavy this guy was. So they've dragged the deceased in a body bag and left him on the floor and gone, hey, you're on a seize? He's actually dead in there. So they've obviously called the police.

They've called, well, not paramedics, but morgue people to come and collect the body. Morg people. Social media user said, yeah, all they could have done was taking the death certificate in. And another contributor said, yep, that's one sure fireway to make sure the deceased is really dead. So they can't be scammed out of their life saving. Wow, way. Do we have a confirmation on how long the body had been decomposing? The tradition over there is to have the funeral fairly quickly.

So what, they dig him up? The family had the access to the body pre-barrial, pre... Had it in the freezer? They had access to the freezer and dropped it off of the bank, basically. Wow. What a deposit, am I right, guys? This is Jess and Rowan. Yes, people are revealing the relationship deal breakers

we all pretend don't matter. Okay, talk to me. Let's bring it to the light. Being able to sit in total silence together without it being awkward. See if it's awkward, it's bad. I like that one, because you know we judge these couples out for dinner.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I judge the ones that are both on their phone. Yeah, okay. But I don't judge the ones that are just sitting quietly eating. Mm. You know, some people go, oh my God, they've got nothing to talk about.

Sometimes it's nice to just enjoy your meal in peace. What if they're if the food's there? No, sorry, the food's not there. And they're staring. And they're not talking to each other. may as well have the phone out or something. No, see, I think the phone is worse. Sometimes sitting in comfortable silence.

I think you and I could sit in comfortable silence. Not when the mics were on, obviously. The backup tape would kick in. But you know that whole thing about just having to fill? I'm fine with silent. I know you are. Yeah, you would be. Shy guy.

Shy guy's good with it. Except at filthy bingo, am I right? Oh my God, he's loud and rude. A person's looks. Really important, apparently. No. It's all about what's on the inside. You don't think so at all.

No. Because I've looked back at some of my exes, Rowan, and gone, well, I was clearly in it for the personality. No, no. When you're with them. Only in the harsh daylight of the breakup, do I go, you're actually gross. But at the time, I didn't see it. So now I'm going to put an asterisk on that one. How important it looks to you.

I mean, your girlfriend's a babe, but I'm just sad. Got to be into it. Got to be into it. Do you believe that you have a type? No. No? I thought I did. Then all my, all of them, like I'm such a player.

All my ex-covers have all looked fairly different. Same. I want my type to be, you know, the tall, dark and handsome, Italian sort of vibe. Oh, I bet you do. I've had so many blonde, beechy, gorgeous, blue-eyed babes. And I'm like, I think that might be my type. I thought I thought I'd have these tall, dark, goffs. chicks, like that kind of odd?

I can see you with a goth, with heaps of piercings. Yeah, well, and tattoos. Yeah, you'd love a hole. Okay, let's just stop. In the face. In the face. You say you love a hole? Yeah, like, you know, septum and lip and like all the ear.

That'd hate a hole. I know you. You know my body. Hygiene, really important. Gotta have good hygiene. Again, asterix on that one. No. My friend.

Taking it off. You, my friends over the weekend were like, how did you jag a husband? You're disgusting. Because I forget, because obviously he's the one I live with now. So I apply the same standards I have with him. Like I'm peeing with the door open. Oh, shut up. I'm not warning anyone about gases, things like that.

Bad is going to attest to this. Yeah. What do you mean? Why? Because we obviously go to the bathroom sometimes at the same time. No, I meant like because you shared the hotel room when we went to the radio That's right, and we also shared the Acro Room when we went to the radio awards. We shared a hotel room.

I just don't care. And you just, and you just rip-ass, no problem, don't you? No, because I think that's funny. I think it's so funny. I think B-O is funny. I think Farts are funny. I think Bair's funny. I think Bair's like, blah.

One of my friends tried to have a go with me for not wearing deodorant before I go to the gym. I was like, what's the point? Well, I don't work hard enough. There's other people in there. There's other people there. Not when I go. Wow, there was one bloke. I'll give you the action.

She will give you that. I met Al this morning. Introduced himself to me and I introduced myself to him. Hi to Al. Good morning. He said he was going to listen. Hi, Al. Hi, Al.

Hi. Last one. There's a lot here, but this is one I picked. Body count. It doesn't matter. People pretending it doesn't matter. Have you and Lucy discussed that though? Angus and I never sat down and actually gone to help.

Yeah, exactly. No, thank you. How does that come up naturally to then judge? Yeah. People just asking. Why are people so insecure? Shy guy, you're single. You're dating someone.

At what point do you go and how many people have you slept with? Once they... I needed the content. I just like, they threw a sec guy. Shy guy, how many? I could have asked Babs, but she's not going to answer that. I think it's too personal. I think once you've...

Once they're on the tally? Oh, once they're on the tally. Tally? Big dog talking about Rostin. We don't know. This is Jess and Rowan. I want to thank Blake. Blake. For his contribution.

He slid into the... the DMs over the weekend. Jess and Rowan, you can do so. Take it to cook at the week prize as well too. Particularly if you make our lives easier and offer up a bit of contento. Always. Blake DM'd.

Good day guys, long time listener, first time messenger. Good on you. Got a bit of a yarn and a question for your team. So as you know, the past weekend gone, Howl and Country, the music festival was in town. Oh, yeah. Yep, yep, yep, yep. He goes, I was a bit late to buying a ticket for the day,

but I was very keen to see the gorgeous headliner, Lamy Wilson, do her thing. I'd had a few drinks and was able to eavesdrop from a spot near the festival site. It's the way to do it. But I really wanted to see Lainey live. Thought I'd try out an old trick and bribe someone working on the gate.

Oh, yeah. Here's where things got interesting. As I called the young fella on the gate over, I realized it was the one and only, Angus Harper. Oh, because he would have been packing up the gate by then. Well, at this point, I think, because I asked Angus now about the rest of Blake's story, he remembers this situation.

It was only about 20 minutes into Laney set. Not much gets past the big dog. So things were still going, and things were still happening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I called over the fella, and it was the one and only, Angus. I tried my best to bribe him with a cool pineapple I had in my pocket. 50 bucks. 50 bucks.

His integrity was still clad. He shook my hand. gentleman and sent me on my way. Coward. My question for the team, who has ever offered or accepted a bribe? Oh, yeah. This is where things get interesting for me. Rowan, he goes, I think I may know Rowan's answer.

Well, I don't know you, Blake's. How do you know what I think? I'm not sure what he means. I don't know what he means. And he put the little sly smirk emoji. But I'm curious about the rest, Jess. You can be bought. Can be bought.

Hey, he's assuming that. Well, is he saying that they can be bought or would have offered a bribe? because he's given a double-barreled phoneer here, Blake. Interesting. But I'm curious about the rest. Jess, Babs, shy guy and the rest of the cookers. I love that story. I shared it with Angus and he goes,

oh my God, I do remember that. He goes, would have done it for 100. Yeah, 50's cheap. Lainey Wilson wasn't cheap to bring to the festival, so I'm going to need more than 50 from Blake. Do you flash a green in front of anyone? They're saying yes. Because how often do you see the green notes these days?

Do you see the green notes? We're all doing the tap, tap, tap cards. We're not rolling out the green. I know that a yellow is called a pineapple. What do you even call a green? Greenback. The only time I ever see greens is when I'm hanging out with your husband. I'll be perfectly honest.

Yeah, because whilst Angus Harper is, you know, Ozzy, Aussie, Aussie, Aussie, English, Irish descent, he's got some ethnicity in him. He has embraced the Italian culture. You always carry a little bit of cash, like my dad. Just a back pocket full of cash. But 131060, I want to do Blake's phone topic there. Have you ever, I'm not sure something's whirring.

That's gone now. Carry on. It wasn't me. Okay. Well, you said, what's that noise? And then you looked down and looked up and it stopped. You went, wasn't me. What are those fan boats that you see across the swamps in America?

Are we in a plane? Sorry. Sorry, just you were doing... Blake's phone topic. What do you think? Do you want to try? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, firstly, actually, Rowan, have you ever offered or accepted a bribe?

The only offering of bribes I would have ever done is like in Bali, where it's like if you can throw over like a 20 to like one of the staff. hook you up. They'll hook you up. I've only ever really bribed and obviously when I'm talking about a political official or police. I used to tip really well in Canada because I learnt really quickly.

That's basically a bribe. If you tip hard they will, because I went out one of the first nights was in Vancouver and someone had said tip hard like your life depends on it. I'm got a lot of money fine. I think the three drinks were like maybe $15. I handed over 30. And said keep the change. I said all yours. They went oh

and they clicked and they pointed He got a couple of the bartenders and pointed at me. And I went, and the next one went to get drinks, there was probably five people deep at the bar. He went, red shirt. Oh. And I went, oh. And then I tipped more again. And I realised over there, that's what happened.

And you used to get, if there was huge lines to the club, like an hour wait, used to go to security guards, give them a 20 and they'd let you in. Well, thank you very much. Thank you. The gig economy. That's how it works. Shy guy, to answer Blake's question. Offered or accepted? No, you're a man of honour.

No. Babs, you wouldn't have the Cajunas to offer a bribe to try and jump a cue. Probably not, no, but I'd accept one. I don't know if I'd accept bribes over. For what? Like, what are you doing in this scenario that then you can offer what? You put your fist in your mouth last year for $200. That's so true.

I did. 30. That's a bribe, isn't it? Just take a bribe. Whatever you've interpreted bribe as you. You off an hundred bucks last week to go on the date with the guy. I've tried to bribe it before. All right, bribe chat.

13-1060 or 048-8-8-1069. Have you ever offered or accepted? This is Jess and Rowan. If you have ever offered or accepted a bribe. Yeah, no judgements here, guys. If you're worried about maybe getting judged. No, and I just mean, like, friendly ones, not like political or illegal ones. Gone 170 down the M-1 and I tried to offer him three grand and he said, no, now I'm in prison.

We don't want those. I don't want that one. No. Can people call us from prison? Oh, they might not be listening from prison. Can you get the listener up in prison? Can you get a phone in prison? I don't even know if you get that.

It depends on your hookups. 10, 10, 60, if you're in prison. 10, 10, 60, if you're in prison. Or 04-8-8-1. Maybe a call will get you busted. Who are you talking to? We're a text. They definitely have radios.

Some prisons, they have Netflix in the cell. We are either a positive or a punishment in prison. I'll put on Jess and Rowan. You're a torture show. We could be in isolation. We could be a torch. Not that squawking fatty again. And Rowan.

Ah, you like what I did. Oh, good one. I got you, baby. I thought, I was like, here we go. I'm going to give her a shit about the way she laughed then. No, no, then you slipped it over. No, come on. Here we don't give you enough credit for your intelligence.

I really like, that's good from you. Shut up. We're talking about bribes. Sorry, yeah, bribed. We're getting off track. which we are known to do. Blake very kindly slid into the DMs over the weekend with some content for us.

He had an interaction with my husband. Blake tried to bribe Angus when he was working the gates at the Howland Country Music Festival last weekend. I love that it took Blake a week to DM us that story. Could have told us last week, but that's fine. I appreciate it. And he wanted to share with me.

My husband is a stand-up guy. would not accept a crisp pineapple to let Blake into the festival to see Lainey Wilson, the headliner. Your husband said if it was green, he would have taken it. Absolutely. Blake went on to say, because I replied saying, legend, that's great. I hope you were still able to enjoy Lainey from outside the fence. He goes, ha-ha, another bloke did accept my bribe, and I did get in.

So I want to make his staff. Yeah. So I've just text that to Angus. I'm like, investigate that. Thank you. But it begs the question. Have you ever offered? offered or accepted a fun little bribe.

Totally. Tony, good morning. Morning, how are we? Yeah, good, babe. You out walking the dog? I'll finish. Oh, you finish. Oh, you finished.

This morning. Oh, very good. Have you ever offered or accepted a bribe? Well, maybe you should change my voice. Oh, okay. I'll call you Schmoney. Yeah, the voice changes on now. Okay, Shmoney, have you ever offered or accepted a bribe?

I've bribed the police establishment. Oh, yeah. another country. Okay. What was the circumstance? I'd been warned when I went to South Africa with my family that the police target tourists in high cars. Yeah. Okay.

I got pulled over twice, many if you get out of one without pain. Yep. You flash him a little boob, Shmoney? How did you get out of that one? We're running away to the airport and the policeman said, you've got to follow me into the station. I said, I'm turning right in a hundred meters going into the airport. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

and he ended up, lent me off. Okay. The other one tossed me a 20, 20 U.S. dollars. Okay, just to, that was enough to get you out of the situation. Yep. Asked the officer, if there was any way we could sort this out without the going to court, as he told me, take about a month, big, long story about what I had to do. Yes. Lost me a 20.

A 20. What if he had said kiss me, Tony? What would you? Shmoney. Oh, I had other people in the car. I could have passed over. Oh, pass the kiss over. This is Jess and Rowan.

Alfa Buc. Jess and Rowans, 10K alpha bucks on hit. You have a chance to win $10,000 at 7 o'clock and at 8 o'clock with Alphabucks. 30 seconds, 10 questions, one letter. All answers must start with the same letter. Got to get all 10. But today, Jess, and from today, if you get nine, we're going to hit you with our redemption round.

Give you another go straight away. New sheet, new game. How good is that? Because the most unsatisfying thing, you might think. could be a zero or a one. No, it's a nine. You got so close and yet no cookies. Whereas we are going to rip out a new sheet and let you go again straight away.

Steve, good morning to you. Oh, good morning, you're good things. You're a good thing, baby. And you're the first person who gets to, I guess, have a bite at this redemption cherry. Should you get nine? But let's just, I mean, cut the BS. Can you just get 10 first go, Steve? Yeah, that's easier, right?

You know what, I don't want to muck around twice. Thank you. Let's just have a crack first go. Thanks, Steve. Come on. Who does? Who does, mate? Steve seems like a no-nonsense kind of guy.

And I reckon you only need the one 30 seconds. What do you want to spend $10,000 on? So we're going away in April with costs, and I'd like to extend that to go to the fun parks with the kids. Oh, bloody, lovely. All righty. Well, how's this for your letter, Steve? It's D for Dream World.

Good. All right. You ready to rock? Ready as I'll ever be, Jess. Amen. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter D, we need to name. An ice cream.

Pass. A country. Denmark. A sport. A pantry item. Dill. A DJ. DJ Kali.

A school subject. A comedy film. Oh, this is disgusting, Steve. A soft drink, Steve. Dite Coke. Something round. Don't know. Don't know, Jess.

Ah, I'm sorry, Steve. God, I like you. I wanted you to win back. Have you had a go before? I know of you, Steve. I've had a couple of days row and I thought, nine. Well, I might get another go because I normally get nine. Yeah, you sound like an operator.

You know what's up. Unfortunately, D just wasn't your. I have five. You said darts, didn't you? I did. Yeah, darts. You could add a drumstick for ice cream. Could have had drama, dance for a school subject.

A comedy field. I don't know. Is there a movie? That's disgusting. I mean, even if there was, that's a tea. That's a tea. Dumb and Dumber. Or date night.

Death at funeral. Dodgeball, one of my face. One of the great movies. One of the great. Or something round, donut, disc, drum. Damn, Steve. Damn. Sorry, brother.

Yeah. Well, you enjoy your trip to college. regardless, but you pay for the theme parks yourself, okay? Sorry, brother. Be it were people. After that, I deserve it. Good on you, mate. Thanks, legend.

Thanks for joining the show. Up next, what we have all been waiting for. We have been on edge waiting to hear. Babs' car story, the update. We're going to bring the blog back early. Jess and Ryan, we'll do that next. This is Jess and Rowan. And this is my blog.

Commence Operation Superstar Brat. So everyone has been asking lots of DMs, people have been calling. I'm sure there's going to be more callers that we don't know about because Babbs is obviously just declining them and not telling us about them. She's the gatekeeper to the phones. Babs was potentially set up, potentially set up, with the car guy. That's right.

Your housemate, Grotty. Groddy. Brought a new car and said Babs, I'm going to need a lift to the car place because then I have to drive the new car away. But also, there's a young fellow there who was a part of the sale that I think has your name written all over him. And that was the key we're all waiting to hear. I bribed you and said if you can go on a date with him, I'll give you some money. That's right.

Not just go, you need to maybe action some things because, you know, we're in our era of putting ourselves out there. Totally. Yeah, well, I kind of want to put myself back in a box now. Oh, no. Oh, no. Was it like that? What happened? All right, tell.

Okay, so I did go on Saturday to the car dealership. And Grody was correct. He was gorgeous. Gorgeous man. He was a gorgeous man. Great chat. I thought we had a little bit of ban time, you know? No way, stop.

No, it's not enough detail. What else do you want to know? I need to know how the banter starts. So does she roll up and go, hey Greg, which is what we've named him. Yes. Hey, Greg, this is me, mate, Babs. Like, how did you insert yourself into the convo? I was just there, really.

And there's not much to it. It's very disappointing. Shy guy, this is killing me. I know what you know. No, I, she did, Grotty just said, this is my housemate, Billy. Sure. And I just said, nice to meet you, Greg. And then I just inserted myself in conversation.

And then. Would love to date you potentially tonight. No, we'll just chatty. We talked about Scooby-Doo and G-YG. Oh, no, one does you watch it. How does that bring up G-Y-G? I don't know. Actually, how did you bring up?

Scooby-Doo is the better question. Because Grotty's calling her Carvelma, because it's orange. So then we're just talking about that. Okay, cute. Was he giving you eye contact? Were you feeling vibes? Was there any sort of chemistry? I was like, you are car salesman, though, so that checks out.

He laughed. He thought maybe she wants to buy a new come to. No, I'm not funny. So I was like, oh, okay, like, that's more. You are. You are. Don't put yourself down. Thanks so much, guys.

Can I ask you a question? And answer, honestly. Yeah. So you're preparing to go. Yeah. Get a little spruce stuff. Did you wear a cute? dress um well i put some yeah like i did my hair and everything so amazing

nice perfume um well i just wore the one that i wear every day yeah so no extra bra no bra no bra yeah close no clothes what we're doing uh yeah and then i have like a platformed like thong shoe on you know oh not those they're gross none to each their own we don't know what gregg's into i wouldn't have worn those okay so there's banter about scuba He do. Long shot on the platform phone. Did he like GYG? Was he like,

nah, prefer Mad Max. No, he said he liked YG. And so you were like, cool, can we get married? Yeah, basically.

And then what happened? Then, well, you know, Grady got the whole rundown of how the car works. Like, we're just like laughing about that.

We're talking about my car because my car was there and like, you know, car chat. Can sell you a car. Yeah. Yeah. Well, he made a joke about,

oh, come back if you ever need a new car. And I was like, What, do you know something about, like, coners that I don't. I need a new man. I'm not in the market for a car, but I am in the market for a man. That's some dude. And then we left.

Great work. I'm on fire today, guys. You are. Then we left. No, I had to leave it. Was that out of you? I just said, oh, nice to meet you. But then I was in the car and I was like, oh, it kind of felt weird to just, you know, come out and be like, well, I'm nervous.

So I just didn't say anything. Yeah, yeah. But then we got home and Grotty. he was like, you know what? I have his phone number. I'm just going to send a text to him and say, hey, like, my housemate that you met today thought you were a really nice guy. Good, good, good, good, good. Here's my, here's her phone number. So she did send it. And I was like, really scared. And he replied, and he was like, oh, that's so nice. I actually have a girlfriend. She's too pretty for me. Oh, that was the one thing we didn't consider. That is the one thing we

didn't know. I was like, of course you do. Because you're gorgeous and, you know, half decent sounds like it. Yeah. And he was so. nice about it though. Then what did you ask after? You go, yeah, but is she hot? Like, what did you say? No, I just went. No, she's a girl's girl.

But do you cheat? Like, do you cheat? Are you cool? No, I wouldn't tell anyone. Brody, you need to take me out of the house because now I feel rejected, please. Take me out of the house. You live there. He can't feel rejected.

No, there was never. I know. But I was like, I'm never doing it. It's not like he said I'm single two and no thanks. Those shoes are awful. They're not all for shoes. They're trendy. Calling something trendy.

Sorry. I have a girlfriend. I have a girlfriend. The 90s fashion is back in, I swear. Okay. So, oh, well, I'm so proud of you from putting yourself out there. No, truly. That is an amazing leap.

You could have at least asked if he cheated because they would have been close. That's horrible. Good answer. No, Rowan, I'm proud of you back. I'm wrong. That's better. I'm not proud of you. I'm proud of you bad.

This is Jess and Rowan. I'm feeling very out of the loop, Rowan. There is a monkey trending. I've already seen it. Headlines on the Today Show. You guys were talking about the saddest video on the internet. It really is. You remember that little hippo?

I've got FOMO. What's that hippo's name? Moodang. Moodang. Remember Mood dang with the Tuckoooo? Something like that. You didn't get across Moodang? Yeah, I remember something about a baby hippo and everyone's like, look how cute it is.

Baby hippos are not cute. Well, at the moment, punch the baby monkey in the Japan City Zoo is now the internet's hot little baby animal topic. Okay, so Mood dang off the top of the food. food chain. Sorry, Moodang. Well, Moodang is now no longer a little little baby. So it's probably not as cute. People don't care. Oh, okay.

This video I probably saw the other day and it was so sad that I tried to delete it from my whole mind. And so when we started talking about over the weekend about what to talk about the show, I'd forgotten about it. I went, oh my God, that's right. That poor sad little monkey. Babs has a video. She's going to show you now, Jess.

Okay. This monkey, for people that don't know, you'll start to see it all over the news and everything. It's a video of a monkey and it has a little toy. But basically, I don't know what it is, a white happens, I don't know it's happened to some people, some animals. They basically, the mother has rejected this poor little baby punch, rejected him. Is that a thing in the, is it macake? How do you say that breed of monkey?

I don't know. I don't have no idea. I don't even want to try and say it. Is that a thing in that, that cold chock? Now, Punch's mother. It's her first litter. So they're not sure whether or it's because it's the first, one of the first babies or it's just really hot and she's just ran out of stamina. The video is the baby trying to get a cuddle from mum.

mom's going, get off me, push. Get off me. But it's not, you know, monkeys also kind of have some human similarities every now and again. Wow, of course. This is very much like a get off me. I want nothing to do with you kind of push. Not like a, not now. Not a, I'm touched out. No. Like, I just need five minutes to myself to have a glass of red wine. It's like, I'm actually done with you. Yeah, and the baby monkeys, they look to or normally cling to their mothers to feel safe. That's how they build their muscles. This mother's going, I don't want to know you. Right. So now punch the baby monkey. has found a little soft orange orangutan toy to cling to.

Yes, I'm just seeing in the caption here, an IKEA orangutan plush toy. So someone's chucked that into the enclosure, be like, cut all this punch. So now everyone's going to the zoo to support punch. So this vision that's gone viral, was that released by the zoo? Or was that just released by a punter?

It looks like a punter video. It does. It's not like CCTV. I don't think the zoo would have wanted that to... Oh, it's very heartbreaking. Isn't it so sad? Oh, my God. Is she full attacking him?

Get off me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a bit ugly. It's like an ugly. It is ugly. And then he goes and gets the doll, the little orangutan and he's just cuddling up to that. Oh, natural form of social discipline, the dragging. Yeah.

According to Zookeepers, the adult monkey was likely scolding punch for annoying another baby monkey. Oh, is punch annoying. Well, I didn't know punch was punching. Is punch punch and other monkeys. And this is the mum disciplining. This is one thing we need to get right. Because we are putting a lot of humanness on this story. Yeah, mum's doing.

Maybe mum's doing the right thing. Mum's get a lot of judgment. I'm not denying. I'm not denying the vision is out of him, very, looking very forlorn. Like, this is my only friend in the world, the IKEA monkey. But is this mum just disciplining, you know,

punch for Ben and naughty, boy. That's the thing. We don't always get the full context. And I didn't have the full context. I just thought, mom hated him. Well, this make you feel a bit better. Maybe. An update, whatever Babs, I don't know why you found this,

from the zoo, maybe. You're not turned on. You're talking this way? Thank you so much. It's from TikTok. In recent days, Rowan, Punch is showing significant progress and has begun to be accepted by the troop.

Oh, you know what? They went viral and everyone. Oh, crap, everyone's looking at this. Oh, everyone lost punch. Even being seen participating in social grooming sessions with the other monkeys, you know, they pick the lights off each other. Does that make you feel a bit better for the monkey?

It's been accepted now by the group. Well, I figured maybe if they had some hardship, more resilient and to be more of a big dog. Nah, the monkeys have gone, Oh, crap, the humans are judging us. Let punch in on the nitpicking circle. Oh, yeah, get him in the circle. Get him in the circle.

Get him in the circle. Get him in the circle. That's right. Great ad for IKEA plush toys, though. They'd be cheering. They'd be cheering. This is Jess and Rowan. Oh, did you almost, are you all right?

Sorry, guys. Just got to take a set. I tried to do a dramatic jump off the chair to show I was ready for action. It's word yokey, but it was not as graceful as I hoped. I thought you're going to break your ankle or something. Okay, let's just get a check. Babs, you ready for wordioki? I'm ready. Mike's working, shy guy.

Great. Working. Good. Rowan? Yes, working. We've all heard me already. It doesn't matter about shy guys, Mike Rowan. The question is gusto.

We all need gusto. Yeah, but Rowan and I, it's a given. You? Okay. Babs is going to give us a word. We're going to attempt to sing a song that has that word as a part of its lyrics. The last time we played this game was. versus Morgan Evans.

And didn't we wipe the floor with him? God, wasn't he pathetic. I mean, he might not come back. Good looking man. Shigoy assures us. He did brief him. He was not aware of the rules. So we have no excuse.

Who knows? Shoggo would have said that he told him the rules. But when Morgan blinks at you and looks you in your eyes, you forget what you say it. Amen, brother. You forget what you say it. Shiggo was actually talking to the manager. He was so discombobulated.

Oh. Those dreamy brown eyes. In the heart of a steel town. Good on you, Morgan Evans. Oh, what a song. New album out now. Nice one. Shy guys.

Let's get it happening. Okay, Babs, let's get it happening. Still learn the game, guys. Still learn the game. All right. Sorry. You're right? You've got plenty of time to clear it.

Do you want me to do it? Guys, guys, what are we doing? Guys, what I'm doing? I think I hate this game. No, I'm ready now. This could be the last one. Let's see how it goes. We could try some new game.

Yeah. It could. First word. Found. We found love in a hopeless place We found love in a hopeless place Next word is Bad

I'm bad I'm bad, you know it You know the one No Michael Jackson Is it she's I don't know if you had those right I don't know if that was the right chum

Well if you can't prove it I'm right No well Babs is the quiz master Thank you Well you agreed I'm scared Don't scare the quiz master with your white eyes. Babs. Thank you so much.

No, that was gusto and you've come in quite, you know, you were confident. I'll take it. Otherwise, Jess is just going to keep winning. Good one. So two points are all. Fantastic. All right. Next one is white.

It don't matter if you're black or white. Shy guy. We'll keep it interesting. That was it. Oh, you won't meet it. Do it. All right. We're all time.

Also, hello. You got us on an MJ band. wagon it would appear. Yeah. Can we do it again? He's got a couple of songs. All right. Next point.

Winns. What? Well, we're all one all. Yeah, it's all one all. And she wants to wrap it up. Oh, right. Okay. What was the word?

Well, haven't done it yet. Oh, I thought you said word was wins. No. Next point wins. I hate this game. It's done, isn't it? It's done. 04-8-8-1069.

Do you want to see it in the bin? I guess. Should we bone it? Spin it or bin it? I would say. The word for the win. Are you ready? No.

Yes, thank you, Babs. Is sky. Sky full of stars. I think I found you. Jess wins. Yay. Thank you, Rowan. You win the last game.

Yeah, we'll play a new game next week. This is Jess and Rowan. If you aren't following us on our socials at Jess and Rowan on Instagram, Jess has been watching the same video from last week. Non-stop. Is that very egotistical with me? I just think we're so. funny.

And you are so physical. Like, I'm physical, but that's the ethnic coming out. Yeah. You're just so physical. My favorite video. Expressive. Very expressive. And you put your whole body into it.

No one can see, but me. And the cameras. So how joyful we can share that. Oh, when they were. To the cookers, I know. But you, Avada cada cadavering. If you missed it, we'll talk about Harry Potter somehow. It was a spoiler thing.

I was just pretending to do the Halada cadaver. Oh. And got her again, got her again with the Habama. That's what it is, guys. I've not seen a lot of shoulder comedy and your shoulders. Oh my God. A mother shoulder comedy guy. You're the shoulder comedy guy.

You know, there's a lot of physical comics out there, a lot of slapstick in movie. But I've never seen, do you consider yourself a comedian? I don't know. I've never done stand up. Yeah. Just a funny guy. I emceed something once. And a wedding, actually.

My cousin's wedding. Someone came up and you're a comedian. And I went, no, because I feel like a loser saying that because I'm not. But I like to tell a funny yarn. I think comedians are the ones that stand on stage, tell the jokes, get off the stage. Fair. You are basically a shoulder comic. One video.

Oh, wow. Shoulder guy. Like Steve Harvey, when he did stand up back in the day, he was all about his feet. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? You shoulder. I got some foot jokes. You got some foot jokes.

You're bringing your foot involved? Whoa. I don't know if you're getting him on the camera and the radio. studio. There's no feet. That's going to be a high kick. I don't trust your hip flexor mobility. Goes up pretty well. Give me a high kick right now. You want to see it? Hopefully the camera gets it.

Why are you taking your headphones off how far back? It's scary, bro. Hang on. Wait, I'm going to film another angle. I don't want to kick the desk. Are you ready? Some foot comedy. Sorry guys for listening at home. This is very visual. Just imagine it. Ha! Oh, that was a bit tight.

Hi, though, wasn't it? Not fair. Shut up, mate. 10, 1060, you'll play Alpha Bucks. Call now. This is Jess and Rowan. Jess and Rowan's 10K Alper Bucks on hit. We are looking to give away our first $10,000 of the year for Alphabucks. 30 seconds, 10 questions, one letter.

All the answers got to have the same letter. Hope and Caitlin can do it. Gide, Caitlin. Hello. Caitlin, how are you feeling for a Monday morning? Oh, I'm nervous. I didn't think I'd get true. I wasn't prepared.

Well. Okay. So do you want to hang up? We've got a standby player. who's hood stepping in. Look, you're not, you've got to try at least. Got to give it a go. You've got to give it a go.

Now, have you heard the new caveat we've got to Alpha Barks? If you get nine, Caitlin, usually, up until today, you would have walked away with nothing. But if you get nine, we will immediately give you another go with a fresh sheet. Yep, another go. Redemption round. So you've kind of got a safety net under you. Kind of. But let's not muck around and just let's get 10 now.

What do you say? That's better. Let's do it. All right. Amazing. The letter you're going to work with my friend is F, F for friend. Oh. F as in.

For friend. Friend. Yep. Yep. Very good. All right. Do you want to give an example? F for.

Fandango. Sure. That'll work. I mean, that does work. Sun top, all time. Lightning. Very, very lightning. Galileo.

Galileo. Caitlin. Yes. F for Fandango. Your time will start up. Get it together. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter F, we need you to name.

A baking ingredient. Flower. A noun. A chocolate. Pass. An animated TV show. A fashion brand? Fashion house?

A number? Five. A Disney character. I worked for Disney. I should know this. Oh. Well, we'll get into that in a second. Certainly not 10, Rowan.

No, I have two maybe nine. Two, maybe three. Two, maybe three. Yeah, fashion house is the question mark. Maybe. I've never heard of it. Not to say it doesn't exist. No, we'll say it to know.

Okay. Now you could have had family friend, chocolate, Fredo, maybe, I don't know, TV show, Futurama, family guy. Our favourite. And Disney character. You said you swoop, didn't he? Want to have another go at it? No, there's no pressure.

Okay. Fairy Mary. There we go. Who's Fairy Mary from? Are you making up answers? Fairy Mary. You have a daughter. Who's Fairy Mary, Caitlin?

Educate me. Yeah. So have you seen the Pixie Hollow movie? No. You've lost me here too. Pixie Hollow. Very Mary. Yeah.

So Tinkerbell was born from a child's first laugh. And she actually has a secret sister, but that's a different movie. But in Pixie Hollow, all the seasons. like are separated. And Fairy Mary is in charge of the spring talent, which is, or spring season. And Tinkerbell is a... You got it.

You got it. We could have also said flounder from... It's okay. Ferry Mary is one of the fairies in the spring, and she's kind of like Tinkerbell's boss. Tinkerbell's boss. I love that. I love that she tried to turn it on me.

Like I was the fool in this conversation. You are the fool. Now I've got to go home to watch Pixie Hollow. Oh my God. For the next five years, probably. It sounds like there's a lot of them. There does. Thank you, Caitlin, for playing, unfortunately, not the 10.

We're back in tomorrow. Still doing redemption, round. You get nine. You get another go at it. Next. We're going to throw it back a bit. What was fancy then? May not be fancy now.

We'll talk about that. After Cato on Jess and Rowan. This is Jess and Rowan. A few things here that we used to consider fancy, but no one wants them anymore in any way, shape or form. Oh, see, everything cyclical is. it. All right.

Used to be cool. Now not cool. Intercom systems in the home. Used to be cool. Do you know what I reckon a lot of these will also be when you were a kid, if your friend had them, you would think they were rich. Yeah, yeah, you would. I remember one of my friends had the intercom, double story house.

Already that was like, you fancy. Intercom system. Buzz the house. Oh, okay. Buzz me in the house. Oh, yeah, I'll let you up. Thank you. It's like you have your own person, little but no,

wants them anymore. No one wants them anymore. Kind of important still, but no one wants them anymore. Yes. A portable GPS, Jess. Remember when you had little tom-toms, they just yell at you and they'd always get wrong? So my mum, when she was in town recently,

we went to see Ed Sheeran in Sydney, had to obviously commute back. Yep. And I needed the GPS to literally turn into my street, basically. I can't do anything without it. Yeah. She went, back in the day. We had the book of maps.

Yeah, the book of maps. We used to have that in the back of the falcon. And she remembers when the tom-tom and the nav man were invented, and it blew everything up. I went, oh my God. Now we're getting like five point demerit fines and $450 fines. We're trying to figure out where we're going, guys.

Absolutely. I was using a TomTom anymore. How about when you used to have a full set encyclopedias? And when people have those on the wall, there's A, B, C, all of them? Yes. I love that. Yeah, was that a sign of like,

look how smart our families? Why are we buying these books? Well, I guess that's how you did your homework back in the days. Before the internet, you had to look it up in the encyclopedia and do your assessment, your assignment, your big poster. Got to go down.

What does this mean? Yeah. Oh, that's a lot. Remember this? Remember the six disc changer in your car? You know what I'm out? In the boot? In the boot?

Yeah, there were some of them. We had one in the boot. I feel like my dad had his in the boot. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yes. Had to open the boot to change the CDs. Unbelievable. Well, that's why you stack six.

You put them in there. You don't have to change them too often. Roll through them. Yes. I think a friend of mine had one and it was under the a seat. They used to put them in the glove box. Might have also been in the glove box.

It would appear you could put them anywhere. How you put in a six stacker in a glove box? That's a deep glove box. You sacrifice your glove box space. That's the option. I'm going to keep a driving gloves. Remember the Blackberries? Of course.

Now we love a button. Blackberry to me was like, oh, you have an important corporate job. Oh, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying? You need to send your emails at the same time. What about paying for rings? Tones. Do you ever pay for ringtones?

Absolutely. I've gotten like video hits or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. My phone hasn't been on loud. Eight years. It's to pay for a ringtone. Do people have custom ringtones today?

No, I think it's the same. I really think it's funny when you set a ringtone for a specific person. You know, like son-in-laws will put like the Darth Vader March when the mother-in-law's calling. Funny, funny, funny. Yeah, funny gear. But yeah, I'm not paying for it now. I have the vibration status and a different ringtone when my father calls. Oh, so.

so you know. I know when Dad's calling. Is that a, I must pick up or I must ignore? I just go, I will know. I'll get it later. I'll get it later. I can get this. Wait, custom vibration.

You can change. You go, do do do do. He goes, do do do do do. I go, oh, that's Dad call. I'll just pick up later. That's cool. Someone has text us. Something that used to be fancy.

Now, not so fancy. Inbuilt spa bath that you step down into. Oh, a down bath? A down bath. Let's go. We growing up. How to step up. Oh, like a little in pool.

Yeah. Fox tell? We've all kind of got Foxtell these days, don't we? That was the be all end all. Yeah, because we're all just streamers. I reckon Foxxel was one of the first things to go for us. You know, we prioritised Netflix and Disney Plus. Oh, my God.

I used to go to my mate's place and he had all the channels. Dylan had all the channels. I was like, what can we watch? And then we'd turn it on. There'd be some porn or something on. We'd go, whoa. Leave it on. Your parents need to lock this.

Cheryl would come in. She'd be furious at us. Things that. that were fancy then, kind of lame now. You know, I'm in the interior design phase. Obviously, we're renovating. I loved this. My parents still have it.

Yeah. Frosted glass bricks. Oh, those big cubes. They're big cubes. They're ugly. Oh, they were, I thought they were so fancy back in the day. I think they're coming back. Because you don't need a curtain shy guy.

It's frosted. It's relatively opaque. You get the privacy, but also lets the light it. Yeah. But according to all the blogs, not cool anymore. 131060. What do you reckon was fancy then? That may be a little bit lame now.

Skinny jeans. Oh, yeah. I only just stop wearing skinny. Ah, there you go. Welcome to the party. Take your calls next. This is Jess and Rowan. What used to be fancy then?

Not so fancy now. Maybe even it's tipped into lame. Yeah, tipped into lame. Fox Tell from Shy Guy, Frosted Glass bricks. from me. He thinks, Shagai thinks the bricks are lame. I don't necessarily think they're lame. Yeah, thank you.

And you had some judgment on some of my reno choices, but if I put a glass brick in, you'll be fine with it. Did I? I'm up and about for this weirdness you're putting in your house. Oh, thank you so much. Well, maybe it was a bit judgy. It was when I told you how much the pot filler was. Bonnie got in touch.

Oh, good on your bond. Morning friends, something that used to be fancy, but not so anymore. Yes. Having a fancy dinner party with the Polish cutlery and the Norataki. dinnerware. What the hell's Norataki dinnerware? I just looked it up. I don't know if I'm pronouncing her correctly.

Maybe Noratake. It's, uh... Not a taket. Fancy, you know, your mum will pull up the fancy stuff. Just like fine china. Now we get whatever we can put in the dishwasher. Amen. Not dishwasher safe.

Well, it's not coming in my house. Thank you very much. Hello, Maria. What was fancy but lame now to you? Uh, the old button up jeans or the old butt-up pants or the old zip-up jeans. Interesting. So are you talking about the bit where you tighten them or just on the side the button up? No, no, on the side.

The bit would come all the way up and stop. I was like, how am I doing my jeans? Yes, like the snaps. Do you remember the Adada snaps down the leg? Yes. Snapping. They were. I thought I was so cool.

Pull them out the other day. You had some snaps. Oh, I had some snaps. I bet you. Adidas. It was like our uniform growing up. Oh, not flaring though. No, no, just the snaps all the way up to the thighs.

Hello, Nikita. Hello. Nikita. was fancy then. Kind of lame now. Tengoguchi. One more time? Tamagotchi.

Oh, yeah. Tamagotchi. Well, they have a fancy, Nikita. Well, they were where I lived, and I was one of seven, so we never had them. But my friend had so many of them. Okay.

So it's a bit of like a... You're seen as cool because they didn't have one. Absolutely. Nikita probably had a real-life pet. Yeah, like a digital one. Remember the Digimon? Digimon. You'd get them together and you'd fight you and your mates would go,

the other side of the room. Did your primary school ban the Digimon and the Tamagotchi eventually? They just didn't like fun. They didn't like fun. Emma, good morning to you. Good morning. What was fancy then, kind of lame now? I'm tacking onto the intercom system.

You mentioned that you'd use them for two-story houses. So I'm going to say two-story houses. Two-story houses. Another level on the house is lame. Are you saying now it's lame? Yeah, you want an open-plan acreage home any old day. Just big, beautiful one story. Must be nice.

Much cash you got, Emma. What are we talking to here? Well, I don't want to brag, but I actually had an intercom and a double story growing up. Oh, my God. You were the rich friend, Emma. I'm not a dollar to my name. Okay. Isn't it funny? Also, anything you had as a kid, you don't want as an adult.

So Emma had the double story intercomer now. She's going, now it's all about the one story. Acreary. A agree. This is Jess and Rowan. Rowan, you know that over the weekend, I had me bougie friends come up for the weekend. We did a little girls vacay.

How boosy are these girls? Well, this is the thing. I've coded them as boogie because we have been mates for 15 years. Right. And they're all now at points of their lives where they're quite successful. They're doing well in their own right. So it's just when we get together, we like to do nice, fancy things. But it's one of those things where there's four of them down in Melbourne.

There's one of me here, obviously. So there's a part of me that always feels guilty about all them coming to me. I try and make more of an effort to go to them. You're the anyone with a kid? No. One of the girls has two. Oh, okay. Right, right, right.

Two. And she's amazing. She makes so much effort. It's incredible. Okay. But they've all got responsibilities and lives. That's what a thing. Yeah, yeah.

But it makes me feel so loved when all four of them went, no, no. You came down last time. It's good, in it. We're going to come to you. It is good. It just made me feel so loved. And that's how you keep friendship alive. in adulthood, hey?

Like, literally, it's effort. You do have to try. You've got to put in some effort. And then also take note of who's not putting in any effort. Well, this is the thing, Rowan. So just a little quick sidebar. There used to be seven of us in this group. That was what happens.

Two of them. No effort. Unfortunately, that's how you start a second group chat without them. Yeah, because they don't try. I don't try. It's not your fault. And to be fair, as I said, I'm the one kind of removes. It's like I'm organising the monthly catch-ups.

The girls left behind are going, Guys, I know we're all busy, but this is how we prioritise friendship and adulthood. I had heaps of school friends. I reckon I catch up with two of them now. You know, just because we've all kind of just, us three have just kind of stay in touch, gone and done things. And this is the thing, you don't have to talk every day. No.

But when you do get together, it's one, happens sometime and you're putting that effort in. Yeah, of course. But I really appreciate it. And I had a bit of a little, bit of a moment with the ladies on Saturday night. Okay, a couple of rosé's deep. Oh, here we go. But I looked them all in the eye. I said, and this is another level, girls, experiences together.

Yeah, yeah, that's big. Because in adulthood, don't we just get caught up in the coffee, catch up, lunch or dinner? Yeah. You spend 200 bucks, go on your merry way, actually making new memories via experience or adventures. If you all have different places, you go somewhere neutral. I mean, you're close here, but still, not somewhere you'd normally be. Yes. Yes, exactly.

So we're already talking by the pool, a couple of watermelon dacarees deep. I'm not saying this was completely fueled by alcohol this weekend. But already talking, all right, what's the next adventure? We're talking about Sri Lanka April next year. You got some with Sri Lanka. I do. Because I tried to pitch it to my parents and my dad said no, so now I'm like, maybe I can get the girls to go to Sri Lanka.

Anyway, there was just one moment over the weekend. I don't like this beautiful. You don't like Sri Lanka for me. You don't like me as a Sri Lanka kind of gal. What do you know about Sri Lanka? I don't know anything, but I know that you probably wouldn't like it. Isn't it just like a tropical, beautiful? tropical beautiful paradise Sri Lanka

Yeah Maybe I don't know but I'm not getting Sri Lankan vibes from you What vibes do you get from me Where should I go with the girls? Like Because we did do Dubbo

Well we did do a beautiful weekend Central Coast that's where we just were Orange would be nice Mudgy I batted up orange because beautiful wine country And they as you may have picked up from this conversation Love a drink Oh yeah

But there was something There was an incident there where I had to have, I had to look inwards. Because you know as a kid, I think you judge your parents. Ah, why you do that? Oh, you're embarrassing. Oh, you're lame. Yeah.

And then you get to a point where you go, I have become my parents. Interesting. Everything I had to go at them about, I have now become. I believe that. Growing up when we would do family holidays, my dad was the kind of dad. Run down pool side at 637 lay towels and bags out to bags the beach. Yeah, yeah. The banana lounges.

I'll move them. I don't care. If you're not there, I'm moving them. Oh, see, that's, I don't like confrontation, so I wouldn't do that. But what I found myself doing Sunday morning, oh, same thing. Wolfing down the breakfast, pocketing a mini croissant to have as a snack later. Smart, smart, smart, smart.

That's one thing my dad used to always do. It's clever. Get the cloth napkin and fill it with pastries from the buffet breakfast. And then going, ladies, I'll meet you down at the pool. And running to the pool, laying out our towels. And to be fair, sitting there for an hour. until they were all ready to come down. By myself.

By myself. Hadn't even sun screamed. So I had to sit at the banana lounge on my own. They should have paid you to wait. Lociening up. But it was the guilt of, they've all come to me. I've got to go the extra effort. Oh, right, of course.

So I'm there trying to do my back, this and that. Yeah. Feel some eyeballs on me. Someone's looking at me. Realise there was four grannies. Obviously, Granny's day out at the resort. Okay. In their walker, you know, the walkers with the seats.

They're all just sitting there watching me lotion up by the pool. And I went. this is what my life is right now. Just running down at 7 a.m. What are they looking at you for? They got nothing better than to do. What else were they? They weren't going in the pool.

They didn't have their togs on. Turn around. What are you looking at, lady? I was going to be like, excuse me, grandma, can you do my back? Oh, are we doing the back stuff now. You can do my back? My friends aren't here yet. I don't want to get burned.

But the things that you're going to judge your parents for, you find yourself in position where you go, nah, shouldn't have judged. Interesting. How that we've come full circle. But anyway, it was a hell of a weekend. He didn't want, he didn't get the older. Which one? Did you get them to rub your back or was it?

Oh, one of them was looking at it. Was it to rub the back or was it more for sunscreen? A. A little bit of column A. Little bit of column B. This is Jess and Rowan. You just brought something to my attention. Who, me? Yeah. Inadvertently.

Last week of summer. Oh, yeah, Saturday. Mm, March. Thank God. I'm after some cool weather, to be honest. Ah, yeah, cool change. We haven't got aircon in the house and I'm just feeling it, man. Are you a fan family?

I'm an aircon family. No, but right now without aircon. Oh, yeah. Do you have to be a fan family? We have one of those nice Dyson fans. Oh, hello. But it doesn't really pump cold air. Someone got his first full-time pay check.

I got this a while ago, actually. Oh, okay. And I just was like... On what money? I just had a bit extra. Okay. Yeah. Saved up for a nice fan.

The one with the hole through it. Yeah. No blades. No blades. But doesn't really do cold air. I just pushed the hot air around. Kind of. It depends how hot it is.

Do you notice, isn't that what a fan does? Yeah. But a good, you know, a good cooling fan has the water spores and water. Oh. scores. They're the good ones. Mr. You know what to be better?

Mr. Thank you, Shiger, with a layout. He has been fantastic today. At the top end and the bottom of the show. Just hear if you need, you know. Shy guy's been on. One of the great bottom ends, shy guy. God forbid we ask for his help at 740, but it's 610 and 8.50.

What did you need at 740? No, I'm just saying. In the middle, in the guts of the show, more often than not, you hit us with a note. I'm not doing that. But today, the bookends have been elite from you. Listen to the podcast. You missed it. Absolutely elite from you.

Anyway, I just wish there was some aircon. So I'm fanging for cold. Yeah, yeah, change. Cold breeze. I'm like big, do. You're in Victoria, you'd be the same. I must sleep with weight on me. So yes, I am a doona gal no matter what, the temp.

However, last night, because my husband had the baby for the whole weekend, because as I said, had the girls weekend away, we rolled back in Sunday afternoon and they both look like they had survived something. So I said to Angus last. night, I'm going to sleep in Lucia's room. Nice. Just from the get go, so you can get at least a solid four hours uninterrupted. So yes, the Noduna in her room.

Oh, yeah. So I was just with a sheet. Oh, well. It is what it is. You do what you've got to do. You do what you do with a child. Back in tomorrow, guys, from six. Redemption round again, we didn't need to activate it today.

But if you get nine in Alpha Bucks, you will immediately get to go again with a fresh sheet. I feel like now we've said it. everyone's been getting eights or tens. I feel like we're not needed now. But we did say it and today they got two and four. Ooh. So. The bookends.

It's a really big bookend day to day, guys. Really was. But that's okay? Try again tomorrow. Try again tomorrow. All right. Have fun. Bye, bye, bye, bye.

That was the Jess and Rowan podcast. The El Maco is back at Maccas. Try the new range today.