Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - Well thank fa...

Episode Date: January 27, 2026

Producer Babs explains the viral penguin and Rohan rants about e-bikes!Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/jess-and-rohanSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The mega Brecky McRap has arrived at Maccas. Here we go. Welcome to the Jess and Rowan podcast. Welcome to the pod. Today was a shit show. Today was a shit show. I'm exhausted. It's after, yeah, I'm getting used to it anyway, but some issues.

We had gremlins right across the network. This is no secret to anyone, but we go across the state. I forgot to tell you. Talk to me. You said gremlins on the show. When I was younger, I went to the, I went to, Dream World, the Gold Coast. And there was a Gremlin's ride.

First time we'd ever left Tasmania, mom and my dad took me out to up there and went to the Gremlin's ride, sat in it, started going, saw a Gremlin, screamed my ass off. How old are you? I would have been five. Oh, no, no. Had you not seen the movie? No, no, no, no, no.

Scream, scream, screams, screams. And then they stopped the ride, reversed it, kicked me off, and then kept it given. And then from then, was it like a roller coaster situation or like a ghost train sort of vibe. Oh, a bit of both. Bit of both. So okay for kids. Sorry.

My old man. What's your parents still and taking a five-year-old on a... I would suggest it was Dad's idea. Okay. I was watching Lord of the Rings when I was nine, you know. Well, but this is when you're five. So that's yet to come. That's true. That information for your father is yet to come.

That's true. The Gremlin's movie is fucking scary. Bro, I'm telling you. That is a scary movie. Hence why I use that phrase for when scary shit goes down in the studio. The little gremlins are a thing, though. Gremlins are a thing. Don't feed them after midnight, Ron.

Don't feed them after. to midnight. But yeah, they caused a bit of havoc today right across the state. A little bit. Poor Macquarie is dealing with things that Newcastle wasn't. Griffon is dealing with things that Koftharb wasn't. Is that true? We were inundated in the DM saying, hey, I can hear the news playing over you guys. What are you laughing at? Okay. I don't think her

mics on anyway. Not laughing. Am I not being accurate? Is that what you're laughing at? I looked at Shiger. I was laughing at. Okay, Shiger, Shiger, what are you laughing at? Just, you're listing all the areas we go to. Yeah. It's no secret. It's no secret.

And I want to, and this is, let's bring the rice cookies in on something. Our boss is all for not acknowledging it. But if you are in Coff's Harbour and you are hearing a problem and it is not acknowledged, I think it makes us look stupid. Yeah. Or if there's an ad playing over the top of us and we're told not to reference it. I think it looks stupid. It looks like we don't know what we're doing.

So I don't know how Shyago is going to put. Everyone knows, I know what I'm doing. Amen. You didn't know that that was happening. So I didn't even know there was a problem. That's how good I am. That's right. But the listeners know that there is a problem.

They do. Yeah, I was getting DMs going, hey, man. So I don't know how Shy Guy is going to put the podcast together today, but whatever you do end up hearing, we do hope you enjoy. Please enjoy. There was some still fun. We had lots of fun today. Lots of fun.

We were on fire. We were on fire. Enjoy the show. 26, something new for breakfast. You know, Jess. Truthies, I'll poop the pits. I trust that a fart. You'll get to know Rowan.

Hot, horny, happy. Yay! It's going to be good. It's going to be all right. Anything could happen. Most of it probably will. I guess I need to enter the mind of a man. Please enter me.

This is Jess and Rowan. This is going to be good. Morning. Good morning. How you doing? Couldn't be. better Ro Roe. And I'm saying that as a big fat lie. Why? I've had a shocker start to the day.

What? We have been living on a fourth-story apartment while we're renovating our house. Yes. We've been living in my in-laws apartment. You know this. You visited multiple times. Lovely spot. I thought the apartment was immune to bugs. No apartment's immune to bugs. We've been there for over six months, Rowan. I've not had one. I've not had one. One bug, granted I've had a flying bug, like a moth, but no ants, no spiders, no cockroach. This morning, 4 a.m. I'm in the kitchen. Like, what is that? What is that in my periphery? Ah, big cockrocha.

Big cockroach. What the hell? Genuinely thought they couldn't get up that high. We did a whole thing last... They jump, bro. They jump. You're going to jump four stories. We did a whole thing last year about how ants... can't get up that high because I've never seen an ant in the apartment.

And we're messy people. If ants were going to come, they'd come. If you had more, it's not likely to get ants than cockroaches because they're little than they. They can, they can permeate smaller cracks and crevices. Anyway, so I haven't had a great start to the day. How were you? I feel good.

You know, I was on my Instagram last night. I'm asking, how do we sleep earlier? And I... You were inundated with help. Heaps, heaps, people. Lots of messages. Everyone has their thing. Everyone has what they do.

Everyone has this is how you've got to do it. Some of the bit wee-woo. Some of them are more like, get melitana bro, knock yourself out. I like wee-woo. See, I'm all about wee-woo methods to help yourself. Are you going to try? Are you going to. Yes, I feel like you would lean into wee-woo.

Are you going to try any of the wee-woo? Some of them were like... I also like the phrase we-woo. I don't think I've heard that before. We-woo, wee-woo. I will maybe lean into the sleepy hot chocolate. You like a sleepy hot chocolate? That doesn't feel.

Wee-woo as much as toddler. Well, it kind of does because, yeah, well, fair. I had some melatonin last night. I found some in the cupboard. I think it was Lucy's. I think it was also prescribed. And that just, check with your doctor. Check with your doctor.

How did it hit you? Well, I feel in a refresh. I feel great this morning. Great. That might be the way to go. But a lot of my friends who are up late, like musos, magnesium, all about magnesium. What's the difference between magnesium and melatonin? See, I don't know.

They seem interchanged. in my mind, but this is because I know nothing. And this is because I think the doctor gives you one. The other doctor doesn't have yellow. Ah, the other doctor is Chemis Warehouse. Yes. Isle three? Yes.

Okay. Oh, I think you go to Chemis and go, oh, can I have this? And they have stuff that's behind the counter where they're like a jar. Oh, like the fancy Panadol. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Do you have to give you a license for fancy melatonin? You know, when you get the hardcore neurophon or whatever. Actually, I don't even know. Because I've never bought it. Maybe Lucy, you can get it over the counter. I don't know. I don't know anything to do with it. A firm shake of the head from the left here from shy guy.

What do you know about melatonin? Oh, okay. Why does it say you're hiding something? It might be. It might be. No, this box didn't have the prescription to slip on it. Didn't say her name. If it was prescription, it would say her name.

This is health, careful. So it's just you can't crack jokes of the health. No, you can't. Let's not huck around. It's too early. It's day two at 603. We can't get away with this nonsense. Dangerous.

We're dangerous. We're live and dangerous. Maybe you have a melatonin dealer. I don't know. Okay, okay. Now you're talking about dealers. If anyone sees him down, on a street corner in a dodgy part of the hood.

Just like, the neighbourhood. Just be like, that bloke's cooked. No, he doesn't sleep for four days. Like, give him some me a lot of order. Okay. Yeah. Anyway, it's good.

I'm going to be. We're on this journey with you because as we've reminded everyone, you've been out of breakfast radio. Well, actually, have you ever done breakfast radio? Yeah, remember I work with Kyle and Jackie O. Of course. They are breakfast radio. I had to do, had to get in there about 10 to 5.

But I lived about half an hour away in the inner west. So it was, and that was like no traffic. So it's like an hour coming home. God damn. But yeah, I used to get up just before 4 o'clock. But you haven't done that for many a year. So we've got to recalibrate the whole body. I think I'm just overreacting.

I think I'll get better at it. I think you will. Like anything. You know. Just got to get used to it. Yeah. What time are you getting into the gym? I got there this morning at 428.

And what time are you getting up 4? At 4. Yeah. But I've read atomic habits, Rowan. You showered? Yes, I've showered. Sorry, sorry. I'll tell you the day she doesn't do.

My, you're lucky, shy guy. New Year, new me, baby. Bored a exma sensitive deodorant. So I'm wearing for you. I hadn't noticed, but I'm very glad to give that. My issue is Rowan. I work out, but I find showering very boring. So I have probably a 30,

30 second shower. Like I rinse. But then I find I get out at the gym. I've got a little onsuit situation. It's like a private bathroom. It's lovely. At a gym. At the gym, it's awesome.

Must be nice. I know. I lock myself in there and no one can use the toilet because I'm using the shower and the whole space. Oh, one of those vibes. But I get out, dry myself off and I'm immediately sweating again because my core temperature is still too high. So I don't know if the shower really takes. But chag I will give you a brisk.

The effort is good, though. The effort is good. That's kind of what I'm worried about is that I won't be able to... Cool down. I'll be cool all the time, baby. Oh, you are. But I'm thinking, will I have time to do the workout, do the shower, get to the show and time? Well, which one's going to be sacrificed?

The workout in of itself or the washing? I don't think you should sacrifice the workout. No, I don't think it's sweaty. It's fine. It's a bloody hot box in here. We can stink in here. We can stink in here. Big show today, guys.

Absolutely. We are doing... No, you go. I was going to say, we've yet to give away the time. $10,000. We've been here for two days. Come on. Come on, guys. Just give us one. We'd like to do it now. Right now. It's 7 and 8 o'clock. $10,000 each time. Could be $20,000.

Could be. We'd love it to be. Oh, Shy Guy dips. Not across the law, but we are doing that. Oh, Rowan. I can't wait for you to see your boarion action. On a day that I am fasting as well, there's going to be something in the studio that we can nibble on. I won't be. This will really mess that up to you. Because actually, shy guy, the rice cookers won't know what they are. Dipping this year. It's a hell of a day.

So stay with us for what shy guy will be dipping in 2026. What else we got, baby? Next, Babs is coming in to explain. I have had a bad explanation yet. It's a journey. It depends how she's feeling. We haven't even said good morning. Good morning, Babs.

Are you fired up to kick off the show? Yeah, let's do it. All right. Get in here, girl. This is Jess and Rowan. The good girl of the team. The Virgin Mary. Sweet Babs.

Barbara. Good morning. Good morning. You're in studio. You demanded the top of the show. You kick the door in and said, guys, I know you're not across the penguin. Yes.

That is blowing up the socials. That's exactly what I did. Let me educate you, your old boomerasses. Yeah, so like many on the internet at the moment, I'm inspired by a penguin. One penguin? Just one penguin. And this is the audio that is being shared around at the moment.

One of them caught our eye. the one in the centre. He would neither go towards the feeding grounds at the edge of the ice, nor return to the colony. But even if he caught him and brought him back to the colony, he would immediately head right back for the mountains.

But why? Sounds like my Austrian friend Lucas narrating. What is that from? So it's a documentary that came out 20 years ago. Ah. But for some reason, you know, TikTok and everything has picked it up. now.

Sure. A slow news day. We've got to go back into the archives. Yeah. So it's a penguin who is like chosen to leave his colony just so we can go towards a mountain range.

On his own. On his own. Just wants some quiet time. So he just said, bye guys and he's just left. And this crew happened to be filming at the time. Yes. And they're confused.

Like why would it do that? Why would the penguin do that? They're a pack animal. Yes, exactly. And like obviously it's going to to die if it, you know, it goes by itself over to the mountains. Oh, no. Yes.

Didn't have a little rucksack. You know, like when a kid wants to run away from home, they pack their toys and maybe some snacks and a rucksack? I threatened to do that once. Dad gave, Dad foot up an order bowl of them. See, you champ. How far did you make it? Like down the road and hit under a bridge and then.

Like a little, like a troll. So far. You think you went like another city. And for how long? Would have been six houses. Yeah. Ah, it would have been like 10 minutes. 10 minutes.

They went, hey, mate. I'm hungry. Can I have some cross kids. Yeah, give you some food, bro. Anyway, penguin. Oh, sorry. Sorry. The penguin didn't have a dad giving him a water bottle.

No. He's just... Was he? Was he? So they find out why he went? Yeah. Like, what's going on? Well, they don't understand why he went.

But basically people are saying, oh, wow, this penguin's really inspirational because it's just, you know, it's forging its own path. And it's become this moment where people are like, okay, I'm going to be like the penguin. Inspirational. Break away from the herd. Yeah. So people are saying he may not survive, but he lived. The penguin lived.

But if the story ends in death for the penguin, And how is that inspiring? But he still went to see the mountains, you know. He lived. He didn't just survive. I hate the story. I like it. I don't understand the use of the word inspiring.

So inspiring. If we are... He got over his friends and went for a walk and came home. Yeah. He didn't come home. So he died? Yes. Well, how is that inspiring you, Babs?

Because he's not going with the colony and doing what everyone wants him to do. He's, you know, he's like, I want to go see the mountains. Is the better option death than being a sheep. You're not getting it. Sounds like the penguins is an anti-backer. Sounds like the penguins got some problems. No. So everyone's saying, you know, like, be like the penguin, like forge your own path. Just do what you want, you know. Get out there.

That's not a new concept though. Why is the penguin getting all this credit for for your own path? Mine's being edited over Taylor Swift songs, though. That's really good. This is Jess and Rowan. In 2026, good morning. We would do Alfa Bucks again at 7, 8 o'clock, both for $10,000. Could get two winners. It would be a $20,000 day, Jess. Oh, my God. Nothing would make me happier than giving the people the money. A man, taking it out from under Shy Guy.

He's sitting on this briefcase here thinking he's incubating it like a mother hen. No, no, no. It's not his. It's yours. It would. By the way, sorry, speaking of stuff that Shy Guy's sitting on. Yes. When are you going to move those bloody jars?

Pick them up, Shygoy. Pick them up. I saw them before. I thought they did not live in the studio. Pick them up. Pick them up here. I want to hear it. Rowan.

There's new listeners to the show. Rowan. There's new listeners to the show. You are, um, You're pointing your... Can you hear that? Shall I let me? No, I'm going to.

Rowan, you're aiming your very fair aggression at the wrong person. What are you talking about? There are my jars. So they're not your jars? I've taken blame. What would I do with 62 jars of Muti? There is. Sixty-six.

What's that? Bring them over here. Can you bring them to me? Bring them over to me. Would you like... No, well, now you're doing a job. So. We're doing a juffing.

Hold, whole thing. And he's right about the number. He didn't just make that up. There is 62. No, didn't we give away three? Remember that lady wanted to come pick up some? Are you joking, bro? No, remember the ladies said I want to make those like tea light things.

And I gave her a bunch. Yeah, we did, we did. So there might be 59. There's Lou cheers in here. Sandwich stacker, long cuts, cucumber slice. They're wicked. Get these out of. All right.

You don't even know this. That's Bisk off. You don't even... My apologies. Thank you. Also, sorry. You've been here two minutes. I've been here eight years.

If I want jars in the studio, I've freaking jars in the studio. But won't break on the carpet, though, Willa? Why would you risk it? Also, don't waste a jar. Oh, I didn't break. Don't disrespect the jar. What about this jar? Stop it.

Can you juggle? You juggle, you juggle, please. A jive. One more? Rowan's throwing jars. She's very, she's called all of them so hard. That's enough. That's not being...

That's really good. You did really well. Thank you. I did juggling for a bit. Shy guy was there. I had a coach. Stop. Over one break. Stop disrespecting the jars. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You're disrespected by leaving them by shy guy. Smelly bum. You bought... It's not smelly. You bought in these jars when your house began to get renovated.

Thank you. So when we had to clear out of our house, Rowan, when we started the renovations. Okay. Obviously, everything had to leave the kitchen. I truly believe a jar is the superior form with which to keep goods, whether that is leftover food, leftover liquid, or even bits and bobs around the house. So I've never thrown out a jar in my life. Never. But when we were moving out of the house to go into the apartment, my husband did say, listen, you got upwards of 60 jars here. There is no room in the apartment for you to bring a bag of jars.

Okay. And I thought, who wants a jar? Why? Did you just give them to, did any listeners want them? Well, no. No one wanted them. This is Jess and Rowan. Yesterday I asked whether or not the people, you guys as well, thought I would be lazy for wanting a gardener, B, and or a cleaner.

And or? This is a man who works the same hours as me. Ah, you got a little side hustle. You're still DJing. I'm still DJing. But you're basically free from 9 a.m to 9pm. and I just questioned why you couldn't do those chores yourself. Well, I still do the chores to a sub-pass standard.

I couldn't believe. I couldn't believe. Catch the drive by there, shy guy. You're kidding? Oh, I caught it. The support you got from the rice cookers. Thank you for calling everyone saying Rowan's a good guy, needs a gardener in his life, needs a cleaner. Someone brought up that I must be anti-small business and you must be pro.

You're pro. Rod, I think he's phrasing, well, he's just support. The Battlers. Always pro rod. Put it that way. Pro Rod. I couldn't believe the support you got. Yesterday I was at home thinking about how tired I was.

Oh my God. And I thought, can you get me, can you set the scene? Yep, burnt peanut on the TV. I have had my feet up on the couch and I was like, do I have a nap now? Or I'm trying to get my sleep better, Jess. You know this. Do I have enough in the tank to pick up the feather duster? No, I didn't.

I didn't. I'd love to see you in a little maid. I clear. Hey, careful what you wish for. You might get with, the sexy feather duster from Beauty of the Beast. It is actually just me and a thong. I love that.

You could charge for that. Yeah. There's an only fan for that. What do you mean? What do you mean? Good, man. I think I already do to do it. I don't have that subscription channel of yours.

Anyway, well. So you're there yesterday. So I was there yesterday. It did the hanging out. Kind of did the, did some washing. I was fine. I was like, as I was doing these things,

I thought, cool this, Cool this because I went outside, looked at the hedge that needed trimming. Oh, yeah, you did bring up the garden. We brought the hedge. The gardening is, I'm a bit half and half on the gardening because I can obviously mow, water the plants. Do you own a mower? No, but the rental I have, they left their mower.

They're like, as in a make sure you do it peasant type of way. Well, yes, that's your responsibility whilst you're in there a boat. And that's fine, and I appreciate it. And I think it's a important note as well. You are renting. Renting, renting, renting. Renting, renting. But the hedge out the front, which actually, by the way, is in front of the main

bedroom. I've let it just grow so that it's more private because it used to be lower. As a man who loves to be nude, it makes sense that nature should work for you. In fact, I open the blinds and get nude. Like, that's what I do. Lucy's like, shut the blinds. And I'm like, no, no, no. When I was a go at me too, he's like, you're giving the neighbours an eyeful.

I said, there's so little joy in life. Let them have any way. Let them cop an eye. I say to Lucy, if they try this hard to see me naked, they're allowed to. They deserve it. Totally. So I've let it go out. But then now, it's obviously the hedges when you shape them, they look great.

But then when you shape them, they grow out and kind of a bit mankie. Kind of like your hair. Yeah. Hang on. That's another drive by. That's another drive by. No, no. Once it's shaped, when it gets out of whack, particularly a gentleman's, it starts looking.

I think I'll make a good point. Am I not? It's the intent. How long your hair got last week off? I went, he's due for a cut. When did I get my hair cut last week? Didn't you go see your barber? Was that an old video?

Well, no. Last week I'd had it cut. Oh. You asked for that. How dare you? Anyway, back to the hedge getting unruly. Well, I just realize it's tall now, and rather than me getting on a ladder, I want someone else to.

You're a tall guy. You can't reach the top of it. No. Okay. You need a professional. Well, I want the hedge where I want it to go so they get up. And they'll have the necessary tools to get up and go flat, where I would just go up. Because if you're on the ground, trying to get the top.

Yeah. It's going to be wonky. I got one of them hedge trimmers, but I got like the $250 one. I haven't got the $1,000 meaty. Yeah, yeah. How are you going? Let alone a ladder. Let alone a ladder.

And like if they fall over, I mean. They've got insurance. They've got insurance. If I fall over, I'm an idiot. Yeah. So I'm going to be getting a gardener. So what I'm hearing is 131060, Jim's mowing or Jim's hedges. Do you want to come trim?

Which is a boat? This is Jess and Rowan. Rowan, I want to be a place where people come, not just. just for some lulls. Oh, okay. Not just for some nonsense and funny times. For some jars? You've got them if you want to.

I've got, we've got jars. We've got, okay, that's two things we stand for. Perhaps a third pillar of the Jess and Rowan program, business advice. Business advice. How do you feel about that? You want to stand for business advice? Totally. Because I'm going to take a leaf out of the book of a Kansas City man.

It's got a hell of a business running, all right? What is it? He sells cars on marketplace. Yeah. Yeah, my cousin does that. He's to do it heaps. He's in the car business, baby. Yep.

He's in the car business, baby. Oh, okay. Well, if you want me to play something, either point. He's in the car business, baby. Beep, beep, is that what you mean? I told you this wouldn't work, so I go. Well, there's a whole heap of issues going on. Oh, see that little X?

Should I see that? Little X at the top? That means nothing's working. Okay, great. Well, cool. Let's try it again. He's in the car business, baby. No, I heard you, babe.

That's good. I'm just saying. Prior to going on air, I said to Rowan, you play it when you're vibing it out, but I gave him a doorway. You know what the ironic thing is about? Well, then I don't, I'm just vibing it. So this issue we've got. Let's explain. No one cares about issues, man.

Well, we can't contact anyone about the issue. It's literally not working. There it is. We've got a car issue, baby. I've clicked it five times. Oh, no. Shut up! Hey.

This guy in Kansas is in the car business, baby. Kind of like Memphis rain. I was just going to stop now. Should I go? You know why? Because he's got probably 15 seconds off it. It'll just cut out. No, I got you the whole song.

Great. It's a great song. I learned from yesterday when I got you 40 seconds of jazz music. Way to learn, baby. Because you guys talked for five minutes. Okay. All right, mate. Here we go.

Rowan. Mama do. Oh. That's bed doesn't work, by the way. I cried it. Mama do. He's in the car business. He sells cars on Marketplace.

Great. He, in particular, likes the Honda Civic. Yep. And a Buick Varaner. The issue is he only has two, one Honda Civic and one Buick Verano. So if you only have two items in your inventory... There's the Jazz Ben! Shut up!

Okay, Shryga, have you... Have you guys called the knock? Because I'm back to call them on my personal phone. I called them on my personal phone and it said user busy. Many people are having issues. Someone else called. Mama Doo has one Honda Civic and one Buick Verano, but he's trying to run a business. Yeah, of course he is.

So what he does is he sells. the car's on marketplace. Ooh, good price. I'll take the Honda Civic, thank you. Nice. And then a couple of hours later, he goes to that person's house, steals it back.

Okay, that's crime. Puts it back on Marketplace. That's crime. Tries to sell it again. Crime. Yeah, the cops are onto him. He is currently facing quite the hefty prison sentence.

How long in prison? How long in prison? I'd Google, but there's no way. Mama Doe is currently in custody. He's being a heavy. held on a $30,000 bond. The scam is only estimated at $24,000. I don't think the bond needs to be more than the crime ever was.

But it's funny because one of the women bought the car, I think she bought the Buick, and then it got stolen seven hours later. Same guy. She had CCTV, though, caught the guy. She went, hang on a minute, that's the bloke who sold me the car. Idiot. I think it might be him.

So, Mama Do, not the best business advice. Yeah. But what we're saying is, do the opposite of Mama Do? Do the opposite of my zoo. There's your business advice from Jess and Rowan. So just so everyone knows, that's where I would press, we'd laugh. Ha ha ha! And I would press the button and we go into the song.

Can we not get out? Well, was it going to work, shy guy? Let's find out. Three, two, one. This is Jess and Rowan. Jess and Rowan's 10K alpha bucks on hit. Oh yeah, baby. $10,000 today.

We could do it twice if you wanted, Jess. I think that's a great idea. I would like to do it twice. Mm-hmm. In fact, it would fire me up to do it twice. Well, first we have to do it once. Before we can talk about twice, right? We had a one yesterday and we had a four yesterday.

So we go to Sarah. Sarah, you wouldn't be calling because you suck at this game. You're calling because you think I'm getting 10. I'm hoping so. No. The time for hoping is over, Sarah. It is the time for action. I'll ask you again.

You're going to get 10 today, aren't you? Yes, I am. Yes, we're. And then what are you spending the money on? Well, at the moment, my car is actually sitting in the mechanics, and I have six kids and school goes back next week. And I'm driving my grandparents' grandparents' 2006 yards, which is only five-seater.

Oh, God. Okay. Sarah needs her car back. It needs a car back. Or a new car. Yeah, okay. New car would be nice. A new car would be nice.

Yeah. Shy guy, you're a car guy. Yep. Is there a car brand, make or model, that starts with a little. letter W. The Jeep Wranglers. No.

Are what we use. Sarah, Wrangler, W is your letter. Would you really take Wrangler? It was a brand of a car? Well, it's the sub-brand of a car. No, no, I just asked for make or model. Okay, my apologies. Brand would be Jeep.

You're absolutely right. I love the detail. I am so passionate about Alphabet. Oh, and I appreciate that. So is Sarah. You're locking in W? Are you ready to play? Yes, I am.

Let's do it. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter W, we need you to name. A country. Wales. An adjective. A past. A reality TV show.

Oh, God, pass. A confectionery brand. Wethers? An occupation. Window washer? A school subject. Woodwork? A band.

Oh, God. A magazine. Woman's Weekly? Something in the bathroom. Window? Is that on or after the buzzer window? Well, is that same answer twice? Window, window.

Oh, no, she said window wash. That's separate to me. That's pretty good. I got six there. That's our best for the Jess and Rowan program. Sarah Six. Well done. I'll give you six for sure.

Oh, well, it'll try. You got a try? Great try. Wales, you got whales, that's good. TV show. Didn't get, could have white swap, wipe out. Addictive, could have warm, wonderful. What else can you get? Band, could have had Wolf Mother Weezer.

West Life, that's my favourite boy band. Everything else you answered, though, Sarah. Well time. Sorry, no cookies for you. That's all right. I guess I'm stuck with the Yaris for a little bit longer. You are. Thank you to Grandma and Grandpa

for letting me borrow the Yaris. Absolutely. Thank you for joining the show. We'll try again. Yeah. Six is not bad. We're getting towards 10, Ro Roe. We're warming up, baby.

We are. Warming up for shy guy dips. We're going to do that next as well. Isn't that a bit of fun? Shy guy dips. It's back for 2026. And we haven't even told people what we're dipping for the new year. It's so exciting.

Rowan's never seen it, heard it, done it live. So do you get nude now? Well, we've got five minutes of Harry to get nude. Okay, I wasn't going to bring that up that I didn't put the edit in. So if you guys love Harry Stiles, guess what? You've got the full song. It is the new one from Harry and we're big Harry fans. It could have been done by the time his intro is over.

Yeah, I know. We could have played the game by now. How has it got another 12 seconds to go? Anyway, we'll be dipping next. New item. That's my job. We'll do it. You've got time.

We'll be dipping next. Jess and Rowan. This is Jess and Rowan. Yeah, it doesn't work. Oh, no. No, we'll work. Just wait because I pressed it. Now we have to wait.

It is a momentous day in the history of 2026 because today we're trying to do something. Bring something back. Let's see. Will it play now? The fan favourite. Yeah, we can't click it again because we don't want to. And I can't see anything, so I'm really guessing. We can't be doing the double click.

You know what it is? It's this big X here says it's not working. Maybe it'll play when that thing goes away because it's been coming in and coming out. We are trying to build up to Shy Guy Dips, which is our favourite game on this station. Let's just pretend it play. If you, no, we need it. If you drag into the on-air window, it might work. Because that's got a fail.

I do not want to touch anything in the on-air window. It'll be right. It'll be right. It's his segment, babe. Let him. Above, yep, drop. Are you sure? Click, drag, drop. Yep. Now play.

Are you ready? Put a stop chain on it. Let me do the stop chain first. Then I'll play. I don't even understand what you guys are talking about. Are you guys ready? Oh, no, now you've hit it. This is really bad.

I was gone for three years and it is still as bad. Shy Guy. You built a new jingle, a new intro and the opener. A whole new opener for 2026. Shai Guy Dips. Could you do it live? No, it requires the production. Babs and I worked really hard yesterday.

Do I press the other one again? Let me try the other one. No, still bad. Great. Okay. Okay. So, Rowan, have you heard Shy Guy Dips? No, I haven't even heard this opener.

So Shy Guy Dips, it's our favourite game because your boy over here, he's good at many things. But unfortunately, one area his skills be lacking. describing stuff. Okay. So what we do is we get something in the studio. Right. Something edible. He describes a series of clues.

If you can guess what he is describing, you win. A fresh unopened version. We might have to play after eight because the phones have just died. The phones? Oh, okay. We'll go to some ads play a song and we'll come back. Oh, no.

I tried my best there to save it. You're very good at your job. I'll give you one of those nominations for that word of a quarter. Yeah, I press play. Oh, you can't go to the ads on the hour. Oh, hang on. No, look, Sid says stop. Rowan, are we doing AM?

Are we talking for two and a half hours? We're going to do AM. What have I been talking about? Thor. This is Jess and Rowan. We were trying to revive something Rowan. For two years on this program, we have played shy guy dips. Your boy over here, someone you've known for the better part of two decades.

Has many skills. You've probably seen a lot of them develop. But here on the show, we really. one skill he doesn't have describing stuff. Hence the game shy guy dips was born. Well, this is the thing with shy guy. He's so efficient and intelligent. He doth not need to go into detail

because he just told you what you wanted to know. Absolutely. Am I right? Thank you. When we're trying to eke a little more out of him, build a game around him. There's no eking. Well, this lack of leakability.

He leaks, though. Is fantastic and we've had a lot of fun with shy guy dips. We've dipped biscuits. We've dipped cereal. Hey, there was a crazy couple of weeks where we sipped. And he described drinks. Okay. Late last year, we licked.

And he described ice creams. What was your favorite lick? The gay time. Just what did you lick the most? Probably the drumsticks. Oh, you liked it. You liked it. Did you just lick or did you?

I don't care for your interchangeable use of drumstick and cornetto. They're two different things. Yeah, don't do that. I passionate about those. It was a drumstick. Was it a drumstick? I could remember what we had. The streets of the Peters.

Did you lick or did you chuck the whole thing in your mouth? Oh, lick. Hello, the game. It's not shy guy bites. It's shy guy licks. Not shy guy shoves. Shy guy shoves. Write that down.

Now that, right back. Have you got your pen poised? Write that down. Shy guy shoves. So what we wanted to do is continue it. Children, bring children in. Shy guy shoves. Can we tell the rice cookers what you were going to dip?

No, because we'll play. later. I haven't got time to go to Coles and buy more. No, no, no, no, not the exact thing. The category. Oh, the category. They are lollies this year. Lollies. Lollies. That was going to be so much fun. Lollies. The unfortunate matter of facts for this Wednesday, the 28th

Jan. Nothing works. Nothing is working except the microphones. And hey, that is the most important part. Should I try the jazz bed? I love that we can hear the click. We can hear the click so clearly. Okay, just going to lay that up. We need the rice cookers to play shy guy dips. And unfortunately we cannot do that because nothing is working in the studio.

We do apologise. We are furiously trying to get everything fixed because not only is there another shot at Alphabarax $10,000 coming up. We need calls for that. We were going to get the Lorax on. Oh my God, the Lorax is coming on the show. The Lorax is coming on the show. And no, not Danny DeVito.

No, not the Dr. Zeus character. That chick that's just going to get some money. The woman in Victoria who dressed as the Lorax on a first date with a real estate agent who were so disgusted, made the outrageous claim. I'm a real estate agent. Okay, here's what we're going to do from now on. If you can sell one of my properties, dress as a law rags, I'll give you $100,000. Shy guy got her.

Yeah, she was going to come on. You better message her, please. I don't want to keep the Lorax hanging. How long do you reckon that took? Do you want to just, what's the time now? Wait, until it says 30. Go. All right.

We'll see how long. Hang on. Hang on a minute. That was zero. Okay, hold on a minute. Does that mean we're back? Does that mean we're back?

Can we like shy guy dips? No. Oh. I'm not taking that as we're back. Okay. One more bed. No, no, no.

Anyway, so what we're trying to say is we apologize for shy guy dips. We are working furiously. You know what it is, Rowan? What is it, Bev? We've come out the gates too strong. The gremlins are going, oh, I've going to rain these guys in. We've launched too hard.

Too hard. Too hard. The gremlins have gone. It could have been the guys down the hall. Oh, crap. This new guy's fantastic. We've got to put the brakes on him. Maybe.

Did anyone notice Jerry, their producer, come under and pull a wire? Did anyone see that? It feels like that's what's happened. Steve's in the hub getting handy with the wires. Writ. Gross. Anyway, try this. This is Jess and Rowan.

I'm devastated. With the phone line problem? We've got many issues in the studio. We thank you for bearing with us. We couldn't play shy guy dips. God, Alpha Bucks is looking. like it's in jeopardy, but at this very moment, we were meant to be speaking to the Lorax.

Oh, yeah, the Lorax girl. It's a Melbourne woman by the name of Terry. Good at Tez. Who rocked up on a first date, dressed as Dr. Zeus's The Lorax. Full orange bodycon suit, big bushy eyebrows and a mustache. And yeah, it was like a dare, wasn't it? She dared herself.

No one dared her. She just trying to have a laugh. He said, I think it'd be nice if you dressed up. She went, I'll show you dressed up. But this guy. Deserved it. arrogant sounding, dude, real estate agent said, you want to try and sell

one of my properties, if you succeed, I'll give you $100,000. I wanted to ask Terry, aka the Lorax, is that real? We will ask you. Because I fall for everything on the internet, Rowan. I am a sucker. I fall for all the AI videos. Well, thank for... Nothing. That wasn't...

No, you didn't. I don't think the dump works anyway, so don't worry about it. Should we try it out? No, it's fine. Push on. Oh, not dump? I thought you said push on as into the dump. Just keep going. So wait, did we don't? Did you press it?

Should I press it? No, it's too late now. It's way past 10 seconds. Yes, what were you going to say? The more you pause. I'm completely forgotten. All I can't call her. And I fall for everything.

Is that what you wanted to drill down? Oh, yeah. I was going to say, thank goodness that you don't care for AI. Yes. But the issue is... Yeah, why don't I have six toes? But the issue is, I keep sending. videos to Shy Guy and Babs being like,

look at this monkey, take this woman's umbrella and fly off like Mary Poppins. And Shy Guy goes, AI. I know that video. My mother sends me videos all the time of ginger cats. Have you seen? All the time and they're always AI, Mum! Have you seen the videos of like the little little kids? They're like, I don't know, three or four and they're really good dance.

Music. Music. And they do that hell of it like, music bump, bump, bump. I fell for the first one. Yeah. They're really good. I've seen it where they put people's dogs and make the dogs do that too. I see dogs. See, dogs, I hope I would fall. I wouldn't fall for, but the kids, I commented on one, shy guy. I said, what a little superstar.

So I wanted to get the Lorax on and just ask, is this real, Terry? Are you pulling my leg? We'll ask her this time tomorrow. Great. This is Jess and Rowan. I think we've established on this program just in the last 24 hours, Rowan. You are either PP or AP. Prop peanut or anti-penet.

Well, I am both, actually. You might be... You're anti-pean. You're number one in the fan club of PPs. Cannot eat the peanut? Yeah, you're allergic. Can watch the peanut. Now, you either know what I'm talking about, or you're about to find out.

Rowan off the cuff yesterday, when I questioned what he is doing with his day, from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. Without missing a beat, you revealed someone's got you in a chokehold. Yeah. It's the burnt peanuts. Yep. On Twitch. Yes. But he has videos on all the socials.

He's a live streams on YouTube as well. Hoolie doly. Now, I had never heard of the burnt peanut, let alone could comprehend why it's taking up so much of your life. Come on down. Babs was with me. Shy guy. You're PP.

Yeah. You're pro peanut. Yeah. More so now than ever, thanks to. I sent. I sent shy guy. Peanut videos. Well, it was just one a day.

But now it's like four videos a day. Have you forced him to become PPE? No, I know he enjoys it. I know he likes it. I know he's sending some back. Is he closet PPE? No, I think he's open PPE right now. Open PPE.

So we had a couple of women in particular message are saying, my husband. Yeah, man. But we got a DM from Nicole. Cassidy. Good morning. Hope your appointment went all right yesterday. Nicole DM'd us last night. I've just seen it this morning.

My 15 month old is obsessed with the peanut. And that to me. Me, Rowan, is the kind of company you keep. You have the sense of humor of a child. I showed this to Cash's baby. My buddy, Tommy Cash is our friend. Yeah, Louie. Lily is nine months old.

So he was sitting down on his bum, mid-spew, probably because he's always spewing, both. And he was probably pre-spew. And then I was just like, let me help him with the peanut. And he started crying. Hey, hey, hey, no screen time for nine months old. You watch, you're getting the screen out for a month. Oh, my God. I introduced this child to a phone.

He's first. His first screen time interaction is the burn pain. That little baby. This is Jess and Rowan. I'm exhausted. It feels like we've been in here for six hours. I am exhausted. It's been too.

We appreciate you bearing with us. We're having a few little gremlins. I'm just like getting my like show endurance back up. Absolutely. So I realized yesterday about 8.30 I was like over it's not the right word, but I was like just like. Well, it's almost like you've been running the aircon with the windows down, which I heard from a mechanic ones, is not good for your fuel economy. And that's what you were doing yesterday. You were flying on all cylinders.

So by 830, you went, I don't have much gas left in the tank. You needed to pull into the servo. Totally. And as I was thinking, you know what, this is going to be a good day. This has been more little things going on. And I think I've overexerted myself more so that I want to do. By the end of the week, two days, I reckon I'll be up and about. You also...

Oh my gosh, it's a short week too. What am I doing? But you also have put a challenge against yourself. What's that? No consumption of anything. You've got a blood test. A blood test later. I don't know if you should have done that on a weekday.

Listen to me right now. Can you get that done on a weekend? The doctor said, you are so, so handsome. We need to test your blood. You are so genetically blessed. Advanced. A blessed. Can you come in?

We've got to test it out. That's how I always feel. Got the show. Because I never tested positive for COVID. I'm a novit. And I'm really worried that a doctor's going to tap me on the shoulder being like, we've got to strap you down to a table and investigate. A bit of last of us, actually.

I meant to. Is that the zombie one? With the mushrooms. Yeah, yeah, I never watched it. And then Ellie, obviously, Ellie, were, never mind. Well, actually, I can talk about it. Who's Ellie? Ellie is like the main character.

Oh, in the last of us. I thought Pedro Pascal was the main character. Kind of. But she's like the, one who is immune. Oh, okay. Look, I've never seen the show. I only know something about mushrooms.

What do you mean? Because didn't it coincide with the mushroom murders down in Victoria? Mushroom murders? Am I blurring my lights? You can make it up, mate? Mushroom murders. Did you play the game show guy, the last of us game? No.

Hey, listen, you're a gamer, bro. Don't use that tone with me. No, so. This is a lot going on right now. He's just picked his phone up and started texting. We're on air. Who are you texting me? It doesn't matter.

Four people texting you does not overarch us talking to you in real time. This is our job, bro. And I'm doing my job, which relates back to the texting. What are the texts? Boss? Babs. Boss Babs? GM Mike. Why is Babbs texting you? Feel free to just talk if you want that.

You know what Babs, just tell them. We've got two things playing at once, guys. No, we don't. Don't tell me it's the jazz bed. Oh my God, is it the jazz bed? Well, if you let me read by text messages. Oh, shut up, babe. What's playing?

I don't know. Well, I'm about to play another thing. Can we go to the triple? Oh, let's chuck a little Taylor Swift on top of the colors. Oh, it's a mashup. No, it's not. Well, it is when there's multiple things playing. Okay.

Something texture that. Who knows what's going to happen. Jess and Rowan. This is Jess and Rowan. Why don't I give you details or something? I'm really over at the moment. I'm pissed off and I'm angry. I'm actually not too bad.

You got your knickers in a twist. You know what I think we could have left in 20-25? E-bikes. Oh, they are here to stay. Are you an e-biker? Absolutely not. So I was with some girlfriends over the weekend

and we wanted to pop down, just down the road. There were five of us and one of the husbands goes, just take a couple of the e-bikes. Shut up, mate. Who said that? The family's got a few.

And I went, you could not get me on one of those death traps. I walked. I walked. I walked. Totally. You're smart.

You are not dinking me. No. The only bike I'm comfortable on and even then is a spin bike. I want to stationary. Why don't you dink this? Like this, I don't, I just, I'm not into them. And I think, I'm not into them. Can I just say, you see him all the time. I've got, I've got no problem. Oh, the fat boys. The fat boy. Oh, just take my fat boy. Who's spending thousands of

dollars on a fat boy? How does so many kids have fat boys? My parents are buying them. I get it. And my issue actually with the e-bikes and the fat boys is not so much the 14 year olds going on the beach, core memories, you know, like good on you. Yeah, but do your helmet up. What's the point of having it on your head if you're not going to buckle it up? Just be so, you know, You know, be saying, my issue is actually more so with the people in their mid-30s writing it to them from work. It is a footpath, not a road. Shit.

What was that? That was the bell. You know, before. Funny that the bell fell off, because you know what they sound like because they come past? But this is the, now, now, just to play devil's avocado. No, don't do it. We're in a climate crisis, Ron. Oh, mate.

If you can get on a fat boy over a car. I think I'm okay with that. No, because these foot cards... I've got more of an issue with the teenagers, but that's because I'm scared of 13-year-olds. Listen. They're a bit too sassy in this day and age. I don't have a problem with the cyclists being in a pack right on the road,

getting out there getting exercise. You're like a middle-aged man in Lycra. Totally. A mammal's a good man, right? You know, it's fine. You prefer a middle-aged man in ice hockey skates, but that's a whole other conversation. I prefer to ice hockey men are hooking up with each other.

And now I'm thinking about it. Thanks a lot. But the cyclists. Heated rivalry, if you know, you know. If you know, you know. So the cyclists always do their best. If they know they're in a pack, they're good. And they go on the roads.

They respect the road rules sometimes. Come on guys. You know you don't all the time. And then they keep it moving. We're all safe. We're careful. People on the e-bikes. But if your issue is keeping it moving, the e-bikes go faster.

No, no, no, no, no, no. Because the e-bikes don't go as fast as cars. And they sit in the middle of the road, like, they're a car. And they either don't have a helmet on or they're like, it's my right. It's not your right. It's not your right, champ. Oh, that's funny. See, that's the 14-year-olds for me.

We're obviously driving in different places. The 14-year-olds that have ride the right where I live have like those e-bikes that look like motorcross bikes. And they're doing monos. They're going faster than cars. Oh, the monos freak me out. I mean, it's not good. Don't do it. But I got no problem with it.

I have a problem with the 35-year-olds riding these dumb e-bikes on the footpath combined with cyclist paths. You know those ones? Where do you stand then? Only use the analogue bikes, not the digital bikes on the ones where people are walking their dogs. Where do you stand on the scooter then? The e-scooter. I'm okay with scooter. At this girlfriend's house, they had a couple of e-bikes and a couple of e-scooters.

And I went, no, thank you. Scoot is fine, scooters-wide. Because scooter might go. You can't do a wheelie on a scooter. No, you can't do a wheelie. We're not putting that challenge out there. You can probably do like... Don't try.

30, I think. That's too fast. And the cops will stop you if you don't want too fast. So the e-scooter for me is a tourist thing. Like you do it in Rome to zip around to dinner. That's a bit of fun. Yeah. When are we going to start throwing these e-bikes in the water?

Like we did with the line bikes. I think people, oh, that's the line bikes. Let's get rid of them. Like, I'm sick of them. It just, I think I've started to feel like if you are riding, and I'm going to say, I'm going to get some hate for this. But personally, I think if you're riding a fat boy to and from work on the same paths that people ride their bikes like push bike, you know, the ones that,

back in the day, we had pedals where if you use one foot down, the other one, you got to actually use yourself. and the same path that the parents were walking their dogs on or they're at the prams. I think you've missed your calling. I think you are, it's a character trait and you're a bit of a flog. Sorry, Sarah. You have been in radio for 15 years. I think you should go into urban planning.

What you need to do is redesign the cities. Okay, so now we've got to do a whole new lane for these idiots and their e-bikes. Because they're not going anywhere, Rowan. They're not going to. So we've got to work with the people. Unless you're going to become mayor and get them banned, which I can't see you having the attention span to run a campaign. Sorry.

So you're not listening. Anyway, we're learning about Rowan in his list of dislikes, E-bikes and fat boys. E-bikes. Which is judgmental from you. Write that down, shy guy. Which one? It was too easy.

I'm sorry. Wow. You see me as an easy fat guy. I'm going to have some real. words after the show. Ow, my hand hurt. Jess and someone new soon. This is Jess and Rowan.

Have you ever done the love languages quiz? Yeah. What's your love language? I always forget them, but mine was like, I can just really remember first. Lucy tells me about it all the time. My first one was like gifts. Like, give me stuff.

Now this is the thing. Is it the language that you like to give out or the language with which you like to receive? Oh, this is okay. Because it's two different things. So do you like to receive gifts? That's how someone can show Rowan love. I went on a podcast once and they made me do it.

I completely forgotten them. But I remember mine was receiving as I like gifts. You like gifts? And like I don't really care for touch. That's like my last one. Sure. And how do you like to give out love? Compliments.

Compliments. So words of affirmation, maybe. Yeah, we're very similar in this regard. I do love buying stuff for people. Okay. So a bit of gift giving and a bit of gift receiving. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think that's definitely up there for me.

I love ice hockey as well. I don't know if that's a real thing. I know your birthday's March 19. I'm writing all these things down for you. So for me, words of affirmation, obviously it's up there. You do look fantastic today. Thank you, baby. I like to say something to her.

I just said words of affirmation. Don't just stare at her. Thank you, Rowan. It is so hard to get a compliment from Friday. Can I tell what you said when we were in the lift this morning? Mm-hmm. You look like the art teacher. That's not new.

You have told me that many. My mother was an art teacher. I got nothing wrong about teachers. Don't you? Just saying Jess dresses like that. You did they look good? Do you think they're hot? No.

It's not what I said. It's so mean. It's so mean. I can't win here. I think you look good but isn't attracted to you. See, would you say that... Sorry, let me rephrase that. Says you look good, but you're not attractive.

Do you think Jess is attractive? That's what I said. That's what you implied. I'm not answering that. Do you think... You don't have to be attracted to her. They're going. But do you think she is attracted...

No, we're not doing this. No, no, no to your questioning. Do you know how fragile my self-esteem is? Not very, so lucky to get away with that. Especially with their hair looking like that. You poor thing. What is that? My apologies.

You didn't want to brush it this morning or something. That's why I didn't have time. Your mum. Sometimes busy. Words of affirmation. Is up there for me. What are you getting at with this fit? Words of affirmation.

It's up there for me. It really came for crux the other day. We had a bit of a double date play date. Oh, yeah, yeah. A couple friends of ours have one little girl. Yep. Angus and I have one little girl. It's nice to get all together because the adults are friends and the little girls are friends.

Play their blocks and stuff. Unfortunately, my daughter, two years old, little bit young to just play unsupervised, all right? She needs a bit of mummy's attention, daddy's attention, interspersed with some alone time. So I often, because I'm the silly one of the four of us, I will take on the role. I'll go down and play with the little girls. Good one. But we're always within earshot because I like to obviously stay. in touch with what the adults are talking about too.

But I found myself getting a song request from the three-year-old. Oh, the older one. The older one says, do you know Frozen? I said, hell yeah. I know Frozen Lottie. She goes, can you sing it? And Rowan. Hard song to sing.

I gave this thing my all. Too much, maybe. I got my Indina Menzel on. I was in that moment. She can really sing. Elsa. Yeah, yeah. She can sing.

And Lottie and Lucia, they were loving it. They were dancing. and they were twirling. Great. But I know, as I said, I'm in earshot of the three other adults in the house. My husband and our couple friends. Yeah. At no point did anyone go,

Oh, sound great, Jess. You're doing good work there, Jess. Thanks for entertaining the kids, Jess. Nothing. What'd they say? Nothing. There's nothing at all. And I kept upping the volume because I thought maybe they can't hear me.

Oh, showing off. I was trying to show off. I was trying to show off. I'm aiming to please. And I got nothing. Yeah, the little girls were having a good time, but let's be real. I want a pat on the back. I want some words of affirmation.

Right. Why am I putting myself like an absolute fool to get no accolades? Well, I don't know. Well, for just the enjoyment of the children, please. We need you to sing next. You want to hear a bit of let it go? I want to hear it. We're having enough issues this morning.

We've got nothing planned for the next break because we can't do what we're going to do. So I think next, you sing. And you tell me if it was worthy of a words of affirmation. Yeah. And if we give you nothing back like they did, you know it was nothing. And you'll just hearing three minutes of let it go. No, just do the hook. Just do the hook.

Oh, no, no, no. It will be three minutes. You're right. We need a pat the time. We need a pat the time. This is Jess and Rowan. How long have you and your partner, Lucy, been together? We have been together for four years.

It's coming up to four years. Are you an anniversary celebrator? We're doing a dinner. We're getting presents. Well, she messes me on Valentine's Day, which I love. That was the first message, which I love to bring up. Yeah. Desperate at home.

She's looking for a date. It's like, good on your doll. And he picked up the radio boy. But just so you know. Hang on, is that how you guys got together? She slid in. That's how Angus got me. Sorry, sorry.

Different kind of slide. We were on hinge. Oh. Yeah. And she saw something in. I would have loved to have that in common. That would have been fun. But I was like, oh, desperate.

What do you message in someone on Valentine's Day? You good, babe. But then again, I replied. I replied to her sitting on my couch on Valentine's Day. Okay. But you had full-time employment back then, so you had some disposable income. I did. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then you lost. that in three years she had to carry you. Sorry. That's true. But that's how you know. She really did have to carry me. That's the one. You know what I mean? She was there through the highs and the lows.

You're back on top. Back doing really well. So how would you say the health of that relationship is? Solid? Do you need some tips? You may as well just give them. A relationship expert. I wouldn't mind hearing them.

Amy Morin. I like what she has to say. What she got to say. Five things couples can do on the weekends to keep their relationship. ship's rock solid. Hump is the first one. No, number one is spend time apart. Why would do plenty of that?

We must be the tightest couple ever. Respect each other's me time, says Amy Moran, the relationship expert. Okay. Even though I'd argue most couples, I think, would have a lot of time apart during the week. Yeah. So weekends would be nice to spend time together. I barely see my husband Monday to Friday.

You got hump on that list or not? There's five. Let's get to it. Okay, okay. Number two, Yep. Connect. Okay.

So once you've had your me time, come back to connect with a ritual. She likes a weekend ritual. Ah. That could be the H word. Or it could be. You don't want to say it. A Sunday night passagata. What's that?

A walk. Okay. After a meal, after your dinner on Sunday, one of my friends Tyler, she calls it the fart walk. Nice to digest. That's what we do. We do the fart walk. You do to digest. Literally a fart walk.

You've had a big roast dinner. I could fart now, actually. Well, you're not walking. Okay. Number three, I guess some of these could be applied to friendship relationships. Okay. We spend time apart. Yep.

We connect with a ritual. What's the ritual? This? Well, I reckon we fight after the show together. Totally. I'll rip ass hard. Number three. Share a meal or an activity.

Yeah. That's one for the modern era. I'm trying to do that a lot more. All serious. I'm trying to do a lot less screens after a certain time. I like that. Even if it is, your ritual becomes we watch. rivalry together of a Sunday afternoon, phones away.

Lucy can have her pants on. Mine have to be off. Okay, but as long as your phone is in the other room, I think Amy Moran, the relationship expert, would be happy. I was even thinking I was like, nothing is more important. Just put the phone away. Nothing is so important that I have to have it like after five. Would you even argue?

Sometimes I try and leave my phone at home, just take the dog out for a week. That scares me. But I always got, I better take it in case there's an emergency. You got to take it. No. Do I have to? Yeah, you got to take it. I'm trying to recalibrate that.

How often is there an emergency? Because the one time you don't take it is one time you'll need it. Think about if like you're walking the dog and someone you don't know and you're the only one around, someone you don't know, maybe like an older lady passes out and you need to call an ambulance. You're the only person there. You go take your phone. When am I ever going to be the only person there though? Well.

But now you've the jeopardy of the woman surviving. I know CPR. I don't want to put that out there. Well, now you've got to do CPR? I did a first aid. You'd still have to do it. You'd still have to, but you've got to take your phone. But if you're at home at night on the couch,

then you can't do phone. Something really happened. You'd just be like, oh, I can't. I know I'll be able to get around. Let me just call. Let me call Lucy. Fair. You know, if it's a big deal.

Number four, to keep your relationship solid, reflect on the week's highs and lows. So maybe Sunday morning. You've popped off to the farmer's market. On the drive there, you can reflect. Reflect. The week's highs and lows. Yep.

And number five is the big one. I like it. It's still not hump. Oh. Well, show appreciation. Yeah. You could show appreciation with your body. Give me a hump.

Or just with your mouth. Yes. That's what I was thinking. This is Jess and Rowan. Well, tomorrow, big show, guys. Are we doing dips tomorrow? Because we couldn't do it today. We couldn't do it today.

I think we must, Rowan. We must do the dips. But also, it's not our call to make. No, it's not. That's also, maybe when we get off here, let's discuss shy guy shoves. Wouldn't mind shy guy shoves. That is a little seed that needs German.

The law axe? We can get the Lorax on. This woman in Victoria, this woman in Victoria, dressed as the Lorax on a date, which has somehow snowballed into a $100,000 bet. Yeah. I need to know if it's legit because I am a sucker and I fall for everything on the internet.

We're going to get her on tomorrow. We're going to get her on. We're on away and back again tomorrow. Goodbye. Bye. That was the Jess and Rowan podcast. The Al Maco is back at Maccas. Try the new range today.