Jess & Ducko - Hit Breakfast - Why did you get a lobster?

Episode Date: February 5, 2026

Rohan reveals Jess' mum slapped his once, Jess thought she was a badass in front of an 11 year old and do tattoos make you boring?Subscribe on LiSTNR: https://play.listnr.com/podcast/jess-and-rohanSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Al Macco is back at Mac is. Try the new range today. Here we go. Welcome to the Jess and Rowan podcast. Hello everybody. Welcome to the podcast. Thank you for tuning in again. You're right.

Am I right? You're okay. No. No. I'm certainly not thriving. I'm not thriving. No way. You've been chugging juice.

You've been sucking down lozenges. We've got rice cookers sending us supplements. Do we actually? Well, Tyler. Oh, yeah. She's a rice cooker. She might be a good friend of mine, but she's still a rice cooker. You actually someone sending someone?

Who? Tyler. Tyler gave you that recommendation, the one that we didn't know what it was. Oh, I thought you meant sending here. And I was like... No, no, sending screenshots of what you should go on. Oh, yes. They're not cheap, the ones she sent.

No, that's expensive brand. Mm. So I asked, we sent her a video, Tyler. So what the hell have you just sent? She sent a video. Should we go live with Tyler's response? Yeah. Look at us.

The thing in the future communicating via video. Oh. That shit. Life-changing. I'm telling you, eat me from period flu every time. I don't get that. TMI, sorry.

But it is the best. Whenever I feel a scratch in my throat, taste like shit, worth it. It will fix whatever the fuck's going on with Rowan's husky stripper voice. And upon quick inspection of the tattoo,

I initially wanted to say crab. Fucking bitch. I'm unsure. Right on. Sorry, I call her that because I know her. Yeah, no, she's a good friend of ours. She's a delight. Crab.

I shouldn't have called that. Crab arm. Pretty crazy. I'm going to call you, Mr. Crabbs. Don't you dare call me Mr. Crabbs? Because it sounds like you have crabs now. I don't have crabs. I'll spread that rumour.

Rowan has crabs. You guys got crabs. I see you scratching. I'm not looking at me like that. Behind my knees. I don't have crabs behind my knees. Let's level jump to friendship. What's the situation downstairs?

Bush? Manscape. Jesus. I try my hardest. It's clay. What the fuck? Clean? Clean. That's not a category.

What I mean is fully gone. Oh. Sorry, that shouldn't be clean. I should have said bear. No, no way. No? I thought men like to go bare makes it look bigger. Not a thing.

I need all the help, but it still doesn't help. No. Because I thought if you were hiding behind a big bush, it's like, oh, little. Whereas if it's bear, there's nothing to detract from the eye. It's weird, man. Gives you the illusion. Bear would be all over. Yeah, I got a little bit going on.

You got a little bit going on. Why? You look at me like that. Babbs, weird. Babs doesn't like this conversation. her lip when I said bear. Because Babs is worried that you're going to ask her next. I'm not going to do that.

He's no, no, eight days. I assume Jess would not use. No, we've had this conversation many times. I need to ask again. On air? Babs and I am private. You don't know what we talk about. You don't know what Babs and I are teamsing.

Good luck. As if you've ever opened teams. Man, sorry. Man scaped. With a razor? With clippers? No, with like scissors. Clippers little film.

One blade. And do you do it in the shower and then rinse or do you do it outside the shower? the shower. The best part is to stay out on the balcony and just come around. With a hedge trim. You know my view is it... Didn't you want to get a gardener? Is that...

Was that just a euphemism? What did I say about trimming the hedges? You said a lot of our trim in the hedges. I mean, it's like, if I'm in my house nude and you can see me, you deserve it. If you're trying hard, fine. I agree. I was making myself some lentils last night and Angus is going, can you put something on? Were you nude?

Yes. Nune in the lentils. And I'm like, I know, I know what's fine. Can you put something on? Fourth story apart. It's fine. How insulting it is, Shirendt. When your husband, the love of your life goes, can you put something on?

Lucy hates that. Lucy, when she's getting changed and she's nude, I will go, I go, nice! I wish. Because obviously it doesn't get changed anyway, other than the bedroom. So when she's getting changed. Really? She won't duck down the hallway.

Get herself a baby bell. Maybe really good. That's just your life chance. That's what I'm in amongst the lentil prep. Get herself a baby bell. A lot of baby. fell. Sometimes when she's stark as she'll be in the bedroom until getting changed and then I'll

like walk past and then she would literally when she hears my feet stop, she goes, no. I go, grabs the towel. Why don't these partners avows? Come on, man. Opposites attract. I don't understand it. I beg him. And you put something on.

It's hilarious. It is so odd. It's so bad because he's going. We've got a hotel and other apartments coming in at both windows. That's fine. Thank you. What are the others that they're looking? We have this here.

We have a hundred. And even if they are, there's a guy over there, he's got a shirt on, who cares? What, you've never seen a boob before? Give me a breath. And you've had a long distance. What are you got a telescope? They're not going to go to like, oh, that's Jess from the radio. They are, and if they...

If they do, please tag us. We've only got 18.8. I'd love to, love to boost that. For about to the Daily Mail. Sex sales. What are you doing over there, calling Lucy? Oh, Angus. Oh.

He might pick up. He's too busy. He is busy. We tried. I was going to say, did you really tell Jess to get you put something on. Put last night. Hot off the presses. Come home from that Newcastle Food Month event.

He had come home from a meeting he had. He's so funny. So he's never naked then. Oh, in the onsuit. To shower. That's fair enough. I know. Turns around, he knocks over the bloody past.

No. That's why we have no nice things in our house. He's broken them all. Am I right? That's why you want the leg for the table. That's why I want a decorative leg. There's just a peen. Turns around loose she starts screaming.

Ah! Daddy! Put something on. Fucking insulting. No, no, no. He was, can you put something on? The tone. Had the frustration.

There you go. It is the tone. And it is all... You're a big nudist. Don't ask her questions. I live in a house. She doesn't like it. I can't walk around naked in my house.

I mean, I do get dressed with the windows. Your housemates might get horny. Remember my neighbour saw my boots at one time. You saw who? Sorry, one sec. Shut up, shut up. Everyone shut up. Hey, just quickly.

Tell him he's on air. You got to because it's illegal. It's on it. No, it's a podcast. But we're recording. You can't record people without their permission. Just quick. He's fine.

He's married. He doesn't make you. Hi, baby. Just quickly. See the tone. Did Jess make dinner last night nude? And you go, can you put something on? Um, well, making dinner is a bit of a stretch.

She was just walking around nude. She wasn't making me dinner. Are you? When I was prepping the lentils. But can you confirm? The tone was, can you put something on? Don't deny it. Yeah, it's about that.

Yeah, get them up, yeah. So not only has insulted me cooking there, also basically said I'm an eyesore. Barely wasn't cooking. Cooking's a stretch is what I think he said. To me fair, I cracked open a can, strained it, put it in a bowl. Yeah, that's cooking. That's cooking. That's cooking. Thank you, Saigon. My big show, and I see that again.

I'll get it. I'm going to drop for Jess and Rowan. In 2026, something new for breakfast. Do you know, Jess? I'm all about wee-woo methods to help yourself. Get ready to come to take a ride. You'll get to know Rowan. Hot, horny happy.

Yay! This is going to be good, it's going to be fine. It's going to be all right. Anything could happen. Most of it probably will. I guess I need to enter the mind of a man. Please enter me. This is Jess and Rowan.

Yes, welcome to Thursday, everybody. Jess and Rowan, back in the chair. You were three minutes later than I was, and I went, he's not going to rock up. He has called him sick and no one's told me. No, I want to come to the show. It's the highlight of my day. You change your tune from yesterday? I feel better.

My voice doesn't sound any better. If the boss says I don't sound good, do I take the rest of the week? But you're here? Yeah, I love it. We've inadvertently matched. We're couples dressing already, Rowan, without... I look better. coordinating. Who looks better in dark blue, shy guy? There is a correct answer.

Ah, you do, Jess. Get your hand off his leg. I have to sit closer to him. He knows. Keep me happy. You have that beautiful Italian. Complexion. Yes, and does I work with the blue. I get it. Also, it's not a jersey guy. Yeah, what jersey is that? No, no, it's just, it's just from jacket pants. Oh, it's not a sporting. It does look like a soccer jersey. It's even worse. Why? Because if you're going to commit to a team. I'm not committed to anything. I'm just pleased to wearing a shirt.

That's right. What does that say, shy guy? Miss Guzzy. That's right. Look at those titties. We are on today, baby. We are. Today feels good.

But no, Rowan, I'm so glad. One, that you're here, but two, feeling better. It's been a big seven shows. And you were pretty worn down, not only vocally, but just in the bod. It was, to be honest, it was the change in sleep. Then it was all the blood, all the blood they took from me. That's right. You had to do a blood test for your naturopus.

and they sucked you dry. It's completely, shine the complete top of it. You need to have a tomahawk every day to replenish your iron stores. And then there was all the smoke and my body just went, good luck this week, bro. Well, I'm going to need you to clear your afternoon, because I've organised someone to come to your house. Good one. Lady. Nude.

No. Okay, all right. Well, let's see what I'm. No. Okay, no. A lady's going to come to your house to help with your... Cleaning? Hydration.

Oh, yes. Nutrient and vitamin levels. Thank you so much. I said I was trying to organise it behind your back, and I hesitated like, oh, what if he's got something on, shy guy? And then I went, he's not going to have anything on it. What's he got? It's too busy watching the burnt peanut.

That's still happening, by the way. Which you could, I guess, watch the burn peanut and enjoy this service. So we'll sink up after the show. She also offered it to me, and I said, no, thanks. Rowan can have it on his own. Two arms, both arms. Well, I guess. You give me one arm, and I'll have the Jess's one on my arm.

You can have a double. Oh, double shot. Yeah. Anyway, so that's organised for you. But I've been trying, I've been trying, guys. Like, don't just think, oh, Rowan's phoning it in, leaving his voices in these. I'm trying all the teas. You were steaming, you're teeing. Still got the pineapple juice here, but maybe you try that in a bit.

We don't need to send babs out again like he did yesterday. No, absolutely not. Lozenged, you're lozenged, you're lubricated. Plants can help, so I've been having lots of plants. Had a massive bucket of soup last night. Just a big bucket of soup. Huge bucket of soup. Having a bucket of soup?

What flavor bucket of soup? The big bucket of soup. Wasn't a fresh onion by any chance because you'll trigger shy guy. Don't say French. Oh, guys, if you're just listening, you're like, what are they talking about? Apparently shy guys only have had one soup in his life and it was a French onion. He didn't care for it. He had it in Thailand.

Whilst he was holidaying in one of the hottest, humidest destinations, he chose to have a French onion soup. No wonder you've written of all soups. My mum is en route. She is coming up. Can she actually make me like a dope vegetable thing? She is killer soup. Yes, she absolutely good. Minestroni?

She does a good minestrone. Oh, Row, doesn't she do a good minstroni? And do you know what she... You know what she puts in her minestrone? Cannellini beans. Oh. Having a bucket of soup?

That's like her own thing. I am going to get my mum, not nude, before you ask, to rock up at your abode. Sweet. Big bucket of soup. When did she get in today? Tomorrow. Okay, make sure I clean hands.

Do I fly her in 24 hours earlier? Just dedicate soup time. Just for ro-ro. Thanks for Rowie. Good, ma. I have flown her up before and I'm like, Ma, you're here to cook. Good. I'm going to need six lasagnas for the freezer.

Go. Is she Nonna? No. She technically... This is just me out of ignorance. I don't really know. No, no, no. To be fair, she's not Italian.

She's Maltese. Ah, what's Maltese then? Nana. And she doesn't care for Nana. No disrespect to my Maltese compatriots. But she felt that sounded a little bit old. And she's not Italian, even though her repertoire in cooking is unbelievable. she may as well be.

So she made up her own grandma name. What's that? Nana Lee. Nanalee. So her name is Lisa. Oh, yeah. She's got many nieces and nieces, all my cousins are girls. They call her Auntie Lee, Auntie Lisa.

Makes sense. So she made it Nanalee. And it's very sweet to hear. That's better than Lana. Nana, it is. Nana. Nana. But my dad, non-no.

He's non-no. He's non-no. He wanted to lean into that. He would love that. Absolutely. But I love it. But I love when the grandmas make up their own grandma name. It's a bit of fun.

Yeah, that's good. Nan-a-Lay. What do you call your grandma? Nan. Nan. Marguerite, isn't it? Yep. Yes, it is.

Nan. Granddad was G-dad. G-dad. Was he a baller? He's just old. But he was good. He sounds cool, G-dad. Yeah, he had a gold watch and stuff.

Oh. You know what I'm saying? Big chunky gold. Nah, just like a little one. A little casio. Little Vite. Yeah, actually. Rock on from the chemist.

Go on your granddad. Respect that, G-dad. Well done, gee. Anyway, big bucket of soup. Big bucket of soup. Try a minute. I'm having a bucket of soup. And a vitamin injection coming your way, wrong.

We will keep you fighting fit to get to the end of the week. But legally, we're not allowed to do it here. That's right. That's why I had to give them your address. I hope that's okay. That's fine. It's coming over to stick me with some needles. Give them my address.

No worry about it. That's right. You seem all right. Shy guy's in a background check. I trust shy guy. Reputable, absolutely. But we got a big show to get through. Roan. So I need you at optimal level.

Happy to do it. Alpha bucks twice today, seven and eight o'clock. $10,000. We'll tell you when it's called, guys. Absolutely, we will. We'll get you across it. We want you to play. I want you to win some money.

Oh my God, it's the last shiphorn. Oh my God, it's the last shiphorn. Guys, this is an example. If you want to get on the boat, our great cruise, thanks to the legends at Royal Caraband. Tomorrow, we call the winner. We call the winner. Today's last day.

So today is the last chance. Sometime before 9 a.m. You hear the shiphorn, you call. Yep. Answer some questions. You could win a cruise tomorrow. Absolutely win a cruise. But next, we are talking about a boxer.

Getting hit so hard, some fell off. This is Jess and Rowan. Someone who could probably do with a day off. Who's this, me? 37-year-old American boxer, Jarrell Miller. 37's old to be boxing, isn't it? Oh, maybe he's boxing, been boxing. Not for very long.

If you've been boxing since you were 18, that's a long time to have been taking blows to the head. But if you just started at 35, you know what I'm saying? I think boxing is lifespan in terms of how long you've been getting hit. I don't know Jarrell Miller's backstory. Never heard of him before. Not a huge boxing fan. The reason we're talking about Jarrell, though, because he was in a clash recently. With an unnamed other boxer.

that is not obviously important to the story. But in the middle of the fight, obviously he's getting smacked around the head. Things are getting sweaty. Heart rates are rising. Yep. He gets hit so hard, body part falls off.

Really? Let's let the commentators explain further. He's losing his hair. Oh, no. This before, but a fighter is getting to hair knocked off his head, Sergio. Wow. That social media, that's like a cartoon.

Looks like a cartoon. The guy, now to be fair, it's not like the guy did one hell of a punch and the toupee flew off. It slowly starts disintegrating off. And the toupee completely pops off by the end of the competition. He is left just with that halo ring where the glue and some of the tufts of the two pay are still stuck. He goes on to win the match.

You'd have to win. If you lose and lose your wig, not good. You're digging a hole and living in that hole for the rest of the days. It's like the women's basketballers that leave the extensions in. Oh, my God. And then they, like, go off a lap and they score and then they run down the other end. And it's a huge trip. And the full 100%.

What are you doing? They're the tapes. You've got to get them sewn in if you are going to do it. Like Shakari Richardson, the amazing American sprinter. That's all sewn in, baby. That's not going anywhere. And it's flying out behind her like a main. Jarrell goes on to win the football.

And as you say, I think he had to rally. Had to. In the post-fight interview, obviously they don't care that he won. All they want to talk about is the toupee flying on. Yeah, of course. He goes, I blame my mother. He goes, I... Another mum getting blamed.

He goes, I had a beautiful head of hair. I never had a toupee until I stayed at my mumma's house and she had some shampoo bottles, obviously, in the bathroom. I've picked one up, not reading the label. used it on me locks. His fault. It was ammonium bleach. I literally lost my hair

two days ago. Didn't want to fight without a head of hair. So I called my manager and said, get me one of those mains. Idiot, that's his fault. Pick me up a toupee and some glue. I slapped it on real quick. Obviously, didn't adhere it correctly.

Couldn't you just go? The sweat would have weakened the glue. Couldn't you just go, oh well, I have no hair now? 100%. And it is interesting because the ammonium bleach, If you look at the head left behind under the toupee, that is bald. Yeah. So that has clearly dissolved his natural hair.

But he goes, I'm a comedian. I make fun of myself. Plus, I won the fight. He did win. But it's funny now because when you Google Jarrell Miller, the first picture that comes up is toupee off. Forever. He's forever the two-pay guy.

Not going to know that he's made. This is Jess and Rowan. You just talk to Shagai for a bit. I'm messaging my mum. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Making sure she's prepared to whip up a bucket of a minute. Estrone for you when she arrives tomorrow. Hey, so it's Shy Guy.

Here's a question. Go. Should you and I, we're talking off air yesterday, should you and I go to that enormous esports arena and play some games soon? We absolutely sure. Because I was thinking about yesterday as I was watching Twitch,

watching these people play. You watching The Peanut? I was watching The Peanut. Yes. And I was like, maybe Shy Guy and I can go down to Sydney and we can play at Fortress. I'm not very good at the games, though. That's okay.

I'm a better viewer of. I'm a better viewer of. But I suspect at a sport if you're at that arena. When you say you're a better view, as in if Rowan was the one competing, would you support? No, but would you be a good support person? You'd be like the coach in the boxing ring that runs over and wipes their brow, takes the mouth guard out and in.

It's like, this place is like games mecca. So it's like there's all these, like, there's like a big, big room where it's like a hundred computers. Yeah, it's in photos. Let's play, play, play, way, we've got to go. We got to go. Yeah, we'll go. You can come if you want. To each.

No, no, Babs and I could do a girl stay out. Yeah, why don't you come play video games? No, I was going to say we could go get pedicures and talk about our favorite Bridgeton sex scenes. But you do it in Sydney so we can all go together? Yes. Work trip! Work trip!

Sound good, Babbs? Yeah. Babs, I'll pay for your pedicure, don't worry. Do you like video games and stuff, Babs? No, no. That's okay. Just like fantasy, erotica, dragon porn. That's not what it is.

It's a book called Fourth Wall or something. Fourth Wing. I think we need to wait for them to have an event, and then we go. Oh, yeah. want an event at the esports place? Yeah. Okay. Send an email.

You're very good with the fingers. Come on. Typey, typey, typey. Jess and Rowan. Good at typing and sending emails. Anyway, thank you for padding. I appreciate you, Shagai. I just really wanted to make sure my mum,

because when she comes to visit, sometimes she's in tourist mode. She's in holiday grandma mode. Nama. You're in cook mode. Sorry. She's very good and it's not fair to keep her skills just to ourselves.

No. I want to look after Ro Roe. Thank you. You know? Speaking of cooking. Talk to me. A Florida man has tossed away $4,000 worth of stolen meat when he found his girlfriend cooking with another man.

You would think we scripted that. Wow. I'm learning for the best, babe. I appreciate you. My skills are contagious. Cuban man. It's accused of stealing nearly $4,000 worth of meat from a Florida grocery stores. It sounds like a lot.

But you get a decent cut of what, scotch fillet, rib-eye? Yeah, yeah, two scotch. Well, two scotch fillets are like, say one of the big three. Yeah. Or big two. What is it, a bank? The big two. That'd be the big four.

It's like 40 bucks. Amen. So four thousand. Shy guy, if you don't mute that computer, I've been waiting. Every time it's gone off this week, I've gone, tell him off there. Tell you my fair. If you don't mute that computer, I'm going to break it. Sorry.

Sorry, guys. I know you're listening to the foreigner man. But I had to address that on me. No, I love that because if you keep forgetting, you've got to address it when it comes up. Unless you're going to write yourself a note. So why are you blaming me? Sorry, Jess, are you... Was it your beat?

Would you like to check my little microphone symbol on the laptop? It is muted, Rowan. I'm a professional. Also, also, sometimes I hear this from shy guy. Sometimes this is what I hear as I'm talking to Jess. No, you don't. No, you do. You do.

No, you do, mate. Okay, well, I'll sit outside then. Sounds like like... No. Sounds like Kim Possible's over there doing it. We don't want you to leave.

But did I not say he's good with his fingers? He's always emailing someone when the mics are on. I'll tell you who's good with his fingers. The Cuban Natchel. 30-year-old from Jacksonville. $1,574 of beef and lamb from Publix around 743

must be an American place. G, C. Lambs expensive. 20 minutes later, $2,084 worth of pork, sirloy, brisket, What's he planning on doing? Has he got an industrial freezer? Because all that's just going to go bad.

It does also say, and personal care items. That's creepy. And then as he was driving home. If he needs some ointment, he needs some ointment. The police were like this man stealing all the meat. He's having a hell of a cookup. But then they saw the meat on the side of the road. There's all this meat on the side of the road.

He went to the house. He's about to surprise his girlfriend, honey. We are eating like kings and queens tonight. Look at all this meat I stole. Nah, she was cooking with another man. Was it another criminal? Because what I'm hearing is the circles these people are rolling in, maybe a little dicey. It's a crime of love is what it is.

It's a crime of passion. It's a crime of pork. But all of that was just wasted. That is awful. It's all gone. It's all gone. If you've gone to the effort to steal $4,000 worth of meat, I would have thought you had, I don't know, a bit more compulsion to eat that meat. Wouldn't have just been turfed because your missus was frying up some chops with another blow.

Oh, just chopping it up with another dude. Well, I mean, while the suspect selection was choice, his method was not kosher. Was that you or was that on the article? This is Jess and Rowan. This is Jess and Rowan. Good morning. I sound so bad. You're not getting a day off.

Everything is doing what it's meant to do. My mum. But nothing was working. My mum has text. Hi, Mum. after I said Rowan needs a bucket of soup. Oh yeah, just a bucket of soup. His throat's not feeling the best.

A bucket of soup? Can you help? She said, of course. Yes. My mum's issue is she flies up from Melbourne. And her issue is often criticizing the supermarkets locally. Am I going to be able to get bollotti beans? Yes, mum.

I'm not in a bloody... Where do you think I... Where do you get baltie beans? From anywhere. Coles, Woolworths, Aldi would have them. 7-11 might happen. Last time, hey man, we found out the quickie mart across from the station had pineapple juice, which blew mine mine.

Can you please go to the fridge and get my pineapple juice for me, please? Right now, quick. Quick, quick, quick, quick. Last time, I'm not going to throw this to the phone so you're released. Shagai, last time my mum visited, she wanted to make stuffed shells, Conchillia, which has ricotta and spinach, and she goes, I'm not going to be able to find ricotta where you live. Ma, stop insulting. Insulting.

Luchia's birthday, she bought her own bakeware. Isn't that? Last year, Rowan, do you remember Lucia's second birthday party? The butterfly cake. My mum made that.

She brought up all her own ingredients, including... Just for ingredients and bakeware. Including, yes, the pan, including the pipe to pipe the icing. I wondered why she grabbed me by the scarf. I was like, try this cake.

Now it makes sense. See? She did three practices at her house And then two here, one real cake, one backup cake. So how many soups do you want? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Do you say backup cake? Yeah, there was another cake in my fridge at home,

which I ended up bringing into work on the Monday. Just in case it didn't go well? Yeah. She almost wanted to do... Thank you, Babs, for the Bible juice. Thank you, sweet angels. Are you swinging from the, no glass, Babs? Just swinging from the bot.

Yeah, baby. Little bot bot bot. I'm drinking from the bottle. We'll wait. I thought you guys were just going to keep talking. I just wanted to watch the pineapple juice go down the gullet because it's a wide mouth on that bottle. Just to wrap your whole mouth around. You got any other mum gear?

Remember when I spent that? We went to that event at your husband's business. Yeah. Which one? That sounds vague. Shut up, man. Don't say which one. Where my mum was there.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You took a very hot pick. That was with my dad where he was holding your leg. But your mom got to sit next. me and I spent the whole time flirting. Absolutely. She's a gorgeous woman. And then, God love her.

And then I would go from flirting, classic push and pull. I'd go flirt and then. And then I'd trade a man. And then I'd trade a man. And then she slapped me in the face. Remember that? She went, she went, oh, because I was I was talking. Yeah, by how many Prosecco's deep was she at that point?

A few. Because I was talking about your brother. I was going. Oh. I was going, hey, like, what's like, got one, like one grandkids? What about another? Like I just, I was really poking at it, right? And I was, I'll be honest, shy guy.

How many prosocoes deep were you? A few. I don't normally drink white wine unless I'm around Angus Harper, right? And so I was. He brings out the fancy side of us all. I was throwing it down. And then I just, and then she was like, oh, well, I was like, may as well just practice Lisa.

And they practice them. And she's, and she was like, well, I've been telling them. And then she's, I won't go and do now. Then she started telling me the best ways to get pregnant. And then I was like, I was like, I was emceeing this event. I was no way. Yeah. too busy. And then she was like, we could do this and this. And then I overstepped and went,

yeah, well, maybe if you threw it this and then did this and she went, whack. But then she like, winked up me. Well, when she lands tomorrow, you keep that, you keep that to yourself, all right? We've learned our lesson. She might not remember that that ever happened. She still texts me. This is Jess and Rowan. Jess and Rowan's 10K alpha bucks on hit. Yes, we did just talk before saying we would love it golf today.

This is why we play. We don't play so Shy Guy can keep sitting on it. We play so Simon can call. Answer 10 things in 30 seconds. He takes the 10 grand cash. Simon, is that the plan for this morning? That is the plan, yes. We'll see if it all pans out.

All right. No, we need, yes, it will pan out, Simon. Yeah, mate, it'll pan out. Yeah, man, it'll pan out. Yeah, that's what I like to hear, brother. That's what I like to hear. Once Shy Guy delivers the briefcase, full of cash to your doorstep.

What are you spending it on? I'm looking at upgrade my caravan, so that'll go real well towards it. Simon, Simon, guess what your letter is? Oh, let's go with Pete. It's C for caravan. Nice. That is a hell of an omen. Wow.

I love that. All righty, Simon. Ten gram would go a long way and then we'll get you off around the country. You ready to rock? I am. Your time will start after the first question. Starting with the letter C, we need you to name something round. Circle.

A board game. Oh, Cludeau. A male singer. Pass. A pantry item. Pass. A reality TV show. Clueless.

An adverb. A pass. An instrument. Ah, fast. An international city. Ooh. Passed. A beauty brand.

Oh, geez. Got me there. Damn. Oh, dearie me. That is a lot harder than you think, isn't it? Yep. So we're told. Simon, you came out really well there.

And I was, you know, just we haven't had anyone go through the whole ten yet. No. You're right. Yep. And you were moving. Anyway. All right, mate. Simon's like, all right, mate.

Well, thanks a long. I don't need the learnings. Go through quickly. The learnings, Rowan. The learn, listen. You heard Simon then go through it quite quickly because you can't get the $10,000 and you don't hear all the answers.

That's true. You know what I'm saying? You could circle back. You can circle back. It'll pop up in your head because you hear the question twice. Oh, is Rowan giving out some little tips. Some little hats. Yeah, I have actually.

Because that's what I want to do. All right, what we're talking about? Okay. Shall I guys look at me like, we're going to move on. Mail Stinger could have been Charlie Puth. Pantiaram could have been crackers. calmly for an adverb. Cello, clarinet.

Chello, you got a bass. Chalo, you got a bass. Ah, we will play again an ace. Yes. I thought there was momentum. That's all right. We can rev it up. There was, to be fair, there was momentum in there.

But it just didn't get the answer. You're right. You're right. He actually just didn't get the answer. All right. Hey, shy guy. You're looking for a house, mate. I got the next app for you.

Jess and Rowan. This is Jess and Rowan. tattoos, you may be boring. We'll talk to you about that after 7.30. I got heaps of them, but I'm... You and I both tatted up. Well, a bit different. Okay, I don't have a scorpion across my whole arm. Justin Rowans.

What's the three-song? Rip-bud and laughs. Pardon me, sorry, you're so much cooler with me. I almost get, like, fighting words because some people go, yo, love your tattoos, man. Why did you want to get a lobster?

Go, you're an... asshole. Oh, damn. I will forever refer to it as a lobster from now on. You're a big fan of the sea. Trying to convince me that I should eat octopus. So it stands to reason you would have a lobster on your arm. I said you don't need to eat octopus, but...

He said, I'll get you with a grilled octopus. I went, no, you won't. How do you swallow them? I don't understand the suckers don't suck to your asophagus. You chew them. You chew them, mate. Oh, my gracious. Yes.

Shy guy, please get us out of this. Deep water. They crawl up your arm and they give you a kiss with their beak. You know, they punch fish? Yeah. David Attenborough caught an octopus punching fish and said, for no reason. They're just jerks. Yeah.

I hate them. Babs hates them too. Speaking of jerks. Shy guy. We're in. Oh, you're Mike next to. You're the jerk. Turn the mic on for God to speak.

Let me say. Classic man trying to mute up. Yeah. I'm careful I'll meet you. All right. Three things, all have one thing in common. You need to tell me what the one thing is in my own style. Yes.

Shy guy and ease. Copy that. Shai guy and ease, yeah. First one. Bluetooth Wi-Fi. Phone. GPS. Connections, things you connect your phone to.

Wireless. Car, car, Apple Play. Airplay. Bluetooth, Wi-Fi. Connectivity. Ways to connect. That's stupid. Tech connectivity.

I'll give it to you. Wireless technology. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were getting. He paid it, you all shut up. It's his game. Next one. Sam.

Shut up, lobster boy. Sam, Freddie Carly. They're from I Carly. They are Babs. Never seen that show. It's a great show. It's very good. It's not that great.

Anyway. Howdy? Medica, Skytree, Birge Califa. Big building. Big buildings. I get it. I get it.

I win. No, I get that one. You know what? give it to Rowan. Let's make it interesting, shy guy. That's the only way he's going to get a point. If you're not careful, I'm going on my clothes and clampy. Next one. Snippy, snippy, snippy.

I'll put you in a pot of boiling water and cook you. Yum. Stampy. Snowball. Elephants. Seners little hopper. Pets on the Simpsons. They are. Stampy's the elephant. Where's my elephant?

That's our niche. And snowboard. They had a couple of snowboards. So what next one you wins is three or where. Yeah, let's wrap it up. But if you would like to. Keep the game alive. Yeah, I'm involved.

Mark's working. Great. Good to know. Yeah, great. Sorry. I've already got a point. Volvo, IKEA, Spotify. One more time.

Volvo, IKEA, Spotify. Swedish companies. Swedish brands. Excuse me. What did you do, Justin? Oh, nothing. Something very highly inappropriate. To me.

That's by the way. Oh, it was a small. of you. You're the only one paying attention to me because classic men weren't looking. And it wasn't to you shy. What did you do? Why are you going red? What's happening in my peripheral? Yeah, by the way, if you're listening in your car, Jess, it'd be up your... I did you? To bavats. Yeah, because you weren't looking. She just surveyed the room with. Yeah, she was like, directly made our contact with me.

Because instead of going, congratulations, Jess, you gave me bub kiss again. Yeah, well, you just came loose. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is Jess and Rowan. Have you had a period of your life living with friends? I know you currently reside with your soulmate Lucy. Yep. But have you shared houses with friends?

So much. Not even strangers. Strangers. They're always strangers. I've never actually done a friend house. Okay. How did you meet the strangers to secure that room in the house? Well, there's always online, flatmate finder kind of things.

Yes, that was my first experience living. with strangers. Where? I've only lived with family, partner, uh, in Newcastle. Oh, right, right. I had to do,

housemates here? Yes. Did you really? Before I met Angus. Did you get along with them? So I lived with. At the time, at the time, yes.

I thought she just lived by yourself. No, when I moved here. Over there. Yeah. You had housemates? Two. And I've never seen or spoken to them since. They still live here?

Couldn't tell you. Oh, wow. There was, so one of them was Bryce. Who? And there's Bryce. And where I currently am living in the apartment building, there's a car who parks behind me in the complex, personalised Roger Bryce.

And literally when I saw that, I went, could it be my Bryce? Your Bryce? But then I saw the Bryce get in this car. Ah, it was a 70-year-old man. That's not my Bryce. But yeah, I think we must have left on bad terms, right?

I did break the lease because I fell in love with Angers and said, see you later, fellas. Oh, so it's your lease and then they had to figure it out. No, we're all on together. There were three of us and we're all equal. And I said, I'm going. It's all about numeral one when you're sharing. 100%.

But Bryce, and this is why I think we left on bad terms. God, I hope he has moved. We left on bad terms, Rowan, because I said, I need to leave. The love of my life has just said, I'm going to clear some wardrobe space moving with me. Can I go? And he went, well, not till you fill the room. That's pretty standard. But I'd already...

Let me leave. So I had to pay. weekly, until we filled the room. I wasn't living there. That's normal. That's normal. That is normal.

Oh, I didn't like that. I tried to get a lawyer involved. Let me out. I want to know. Yeah, but what's this their job? I went behind Bryce's back and went to the real estate landlord person. And I said, excuse me, how do I get out of this? And she went, I don't care how the rent gets paid.

But if you don't pay your portion, well, I'm going after the other two. I went. I don't want to do that. Oh, well, you could have. No, no, exactly. That's why then I felt bad. She made me feel like a bad person. Sorry, what are we talking about?

So that's flatmates. That was flatmate finders. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Old news, Rowan. That's not how people are finding flatmate. Flatmates. Handing out, what they're handing out, brochers and stuff? Nah, dating apps.

Your hinges, your bumbles, your tinders. What do you mean? One woman, Rachel, she's gone viral. She's a 23-year-old from Sydney. She has taken to the internet to share her experience. She matched with a fella. The fella said, how's your day? She went, oh, I'm a bit tired.

I've been interviewing potential flatmates. roommates all afternoon. Wow. It's exhausting. Of course. He said, oh, what's the place like? Are you subletting? Because I am currently in the market for a new place.

It's the worst place to find someone. And she went on to say, excuse me, this started as potential romance. I'm now not going to let you move in. They're hooking up for sure. Under the guise of you just need a place to live. She goes, are people now using the connection you're making on the dating apps because of the rental crisis and the cost of living, she's going, no way, I'm already suss.

Yuck. But I would say to Rachel and to anyone in this situation, you were going to let anyone move in anyway. What's the difference if you connect on Bumble or Hinge or if you connect on Flatmate Finder? Because you are both her and the other guy were both on Tinder looking for romantic interest. What are you saying?

Men and women can't be friends. Not if you're on an app looking for romantic interest. Well, can't I turn that off and go? What are we on, Binder, best friend Tinder? Like, is Binder a real thing. Wait, but it's trade market ASAP.

I think there is friend finder. There's, no, there's friend bumble, bumble friend or whatever. What's the difference of meeting a person going, cool, you're single,

I'm single, we're going to live together and then a relationship developing. Are you kidding? Is this a joke? Are you like, are you, are you adding mayor for the radio?

No, I'm genuinely asking, what's the difference of someone? Because when you meet someone online as a housemate, your meeting is like a platonic housemate thing. And then when you're on Tinder,

you're meeting to hook up or spend the rest of your life with someone. It's the first conversation she'd had with this. Let's call him Jared. Who's to say romance was going to blossom at all? That's true. Thank you. It's not.

It's the first conversation they've had, they've not slept together three times and gone on four days. But you're going on Tinder to find a romantic interest. That doesn't mean you find a romantic interest. You could find someone. So you let them live with you, the people that you are potentially looking to find to talk up with someone. Not necessarily, but why not consider them as an option to do?

take the room and pay the rent. Pass. A huge pass. You're saying if you meet under the guise of romance, you are stricken from the record. You cannot then have a friendship, a housemate situation, God forbid you bump into each other in the street.

Friendship is okay, house, no. What, you can't live with a friend? You can live with a friend, but what... So how long has to pass before Rachel can say to Jared, cool, you can live in that house? Interesting question. I would say there needs to be time, maybe... Does one of them have to have a friend?

new partner. That would definitely help. Wow. Six months. I think where you meet someone is where you meet someone. A six months friend. Babs, you live with two girlfriends, to be fair. If you met someone on an app and they just happened to start talking about needing a place, would you have the idea, no?

Come live with me. I've locked you in as romance or would you consider, we need to fill that room. You're a person and you can pay. I think I would have to do very, like a lot of vibe checks first. But that would apply to anyone, right? Imagine the crazy sentence. Hey, I know we're looking for a housemate. Found a dude on Tinder.

That's essentially what Rachel's saying, but she's going, there's no way. That's kind of what happened. But she said no way. She's in Rowan's camp. Have you ever hooked up with a housemate? No. Have you ever had a housemate? No.

Yes. That wasn't your mum? No, I've had housemate. Have you? I thought you went from your mom to living on your own. No, no. Girls? Hot ones?

No, no. Not friends. Friends. He doesn't want to insult his friends, Rowan. So, careful. No. No. I can't believe you want to just see a person as a person.

I do see people as people. No, you see them as romantic interest or not. On Tinder? Yeah. I absolutely see them as romantic interest. This is Hinge. That's the grown-up one. This is Jess and Rowan. One thing I'm going to do this year, Jess, is you've obviously seen my tattoos on my left arm.

That's right. You got a big lobster. Is that a ladybug? It is a scorpion. Thank you. Yeah, but now that you've told me some people get it confused for a lobster, I can't see anything but... Lobby Lobster. Lobby Lobster.

What lobsters are in pop culture? Shy guy. Mr. Crabs. from Spongeb. Is that a lobster? Pardon me, isn't he a crab? I actually hate SpongeBob. If his name's Mr. Crabs, he can't say.

It's not the same. How dare you? Sebastian is a crab. Mr. Crabs is a crab. Are there lobsters? I can't think of one animated lobster. Me or ever. I know there's a friend's reference.

Where do we get Lobby the Lobster from me? Be my lobster. Be my lobster. My best friend Mel will be very happy with me mentioning that because I'm not a friend's fan. Lobster's not getting a huge run. in Disney. Rock Lobster.

Rock lobster. Anyway, so you chose a lobster and a ladybug? What's that other? It's a red and black? It's a red and black? I saw red and black. Oh, it's a love heart with a mouth. I've got nails.

Anyway, I'm going to fill this arm up, down here, up there. And I'm going to start on this arm. Well, you have started on that arm, which is actually a tattoo I really enjoy. It's a blue whale. Is it a blue whale? Yeah. Humpback, sperm. Walker?

It's not an or hawker. It's that whale that used to go up and down the East Coast. Oh, did you bring in real life inspo? Yeah. If you care, because I actually do care about these stuff, like why you get tattoos and then what they mean, we'll do a little video on Jess and Rowan if you want to learn. Yeah, maybe about most of them.

Maybe not about all of them. Oh, have you got exes? Have you got exes? Which one do you reckon is the ex? Is it the lobster? Oh, is it the whale? I would have said the love heart. Hang on, hang on.

It's the whale. No lady wants to. to be connected to a whale. That was a mistake from you. Is that why the relationship? No, no, no, no. It's not Lucy. It's an ex.

No, no, no, no. Oh, yeah, it's an ex. Listen, I'd already broken up. No, no, no, what I'm saying, I missed if it was a relationship current. Well, she used to refer to herself as, because there's a whale that happened down the east coast, Migaloo. Of course, megaloo. Of course. And when she was really pale, she used to refer to herself as Migaloolew as Migaloo.

the white whale. I was going to say Miglo was an Albano whale, wasn't he? I reckon I'm going to get covered up to be honest. You absolutely should. I would rather see a big black splotch. We literally, you freaking hypocrite. We literally spoke on this program. Skin's different, man.

Shy guy. You can stop eating the bean dish. Days ago, shy guy. Daydreaming about your old love. Days ago, less than 72 hours ago, your mate had a ripen rip and tear on me for making a delicious bean dish that yes, an ex taught me. He's got a tattoo. I've got two, mate, actually.

Same chick. Diggleoo? Different chick. Have you got two migaloo? Different chick, but the second, but the first one. What's the other tattoo? And where is it? Can you show me?

It's like actually the first tattoo I got. Is it on your derrier? It's right in between my, and my. No, it's not. It's on my ankle. But I've got a big crossover it. Love that. Like a line through it.

Because I've been meaning to get this arm done, and that's the first place it's going. But I just haven't had the money, because I've been broke for three years as a DJ. Thanks a lot. That's fair, because you're not a very good one. Never got booked. Obviously, I'm joking.

I'm joking. I do the bookings for your husband's venue. Okay, I've booked them. I do the book. Is it not paying you enough? Do we need to have a meeting? I think we should have a meeting. Oh, let's have a meeting.

I'll advocate for you. I can't believe you have a whale tattoo for an ex. And up next, Tattoes are trending. They are actually trending, yes. Hollywood actor has had a go. He's got a crack, man. And I quite like this Hollywood actor.

So what he says, I'm on board with? Yeah, a bit of a controversial statement. Very controversial from Will Arnett. Well, we should definitely talk about it because I think... Batman Lego has come for tattoos. It could be true. Oh my God, he's Batman Lego. He's Batman Lego.

So we're the next, Jess and Rowan. Good morning. This is Jess and Rowan. So you love Will Arnette, don't you? I do. Relatively new to his fandom. I do like a rested development. I loved the movie Blades of Glory. And I did like Lego Batman.

But he was a recent guest on my favourite podcast. Yeah. The timbre of his voice, Rowan. He has a great voice. Unbelievable voice, but he's a very funny dude. He also was married to Amy Polar. Oh, they married? But they are divorced now.

So I don't know what that means. Well, he was on a podcast talking about. He's dislike for tattoos, I would say. I have a very controversial position on tattoos. There's a proportionate sort of relationship between how many tattoos you have and how little personality you have. And I find a lot, people who have a ton of tattoos often are super fucking boring. Like truly boring people.

He basically said it's a manufactured edge, which I can almost agree with. Is he a clean skin? Is he saying he has none? Or is he like, I've got two tasteful ones and that's a... enough. Yeah, no, he, I think he's a claim. By the way, he's talking, it sounds like he's a clean skin. It does sound like a clean skin.

Because my thing is, I want to get more. How many do you currently have on your body? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. You don't know off the top of your head. No. It's that many. About nine or ten, maybe. I've got two.

Yeah. Babs, you've got a few. I want like 25, 30. Yeah, I have a few. More than two? Yeah, more than two. But less than nine. Yes.

And shy guy's a clean skin. No, nine. So as the clean skin in the room, shy guy, do you agree? with Will Arnett, do you think it's a manufactured edge, a manufactured thing that may be conversation starter? Rowan doesn't have enough to bring to the table so all he does is floppy's

lobster arm and hope someone asks about it. They just do nothing for me. I just don't care either way. Do you just? I'm not going to ask you about him. I don't ever ask you about yours. No, exactly. He doesn't care. Oh, so yeah, I find it an interesting

conversation starter, but Will he's saying you're boring. That's boring. I intend to ask people about. their tattoos anyway. Like if I, if they have full arm, I don't, like, both like everywhere. I don't really care. Isn't it funny? Full arm, where do you start? What do you ask about? That's why I think just a couple, like your lobster, that is worthy of a, what's the motivation there? The only time I ever ask people about their tattoos is if they're really good and I go, who did that? Ah, you want a recommendation. Yeah, who did that? Who did that? But you're on the backstory.

I don't care why you have it. Couldn't care. Wow. And I was, and I don't really. What a way to bond with your fellow tattoo lover, finding the inspiration. Like, I love learning now that that whale, which I thought was cute, is now connected to an ex. That is interesting to me. And I would have thought

Will Arnett would find that interesting as well. Tattoo regrets is one of my favorite conversations. Well, interesting you say tattoo regrets. My mother is so against tattoos. And I think I was a bit like, oh, I'm going to get a million. And I thought about it. I heard Harley Breed. Remember that name?

Harley Breed? I love Harley Brin. I heard Harley Breed talk about it. It was one of his stand-up bits. And he was like, oh, they always asked me Do you regret your tattoos? Do you regret your tattoos? He's like, there's a heat more shit that I regret that I regret more than a couple of things on my skin.

I heard that and I went, I'm getting tattoos. Absolutely. Totally. So when you got your first tattoo, how did your mother react? Was she upset with you? She didn't know because it was on my foot. She didn't care. Okay.

And then she saw this one on a radio, the eagle. The big eagle on your forearm there, bicep. She saw that on a radio clip and went, what is that? That was how she discovered it. It's for me. It's not for her. Get over it, Garon. Let's go.

But she has to look at you. you. I'm going to look at my face. What am I, a piece of meat? It's covered in ink. This is Jess and Rowan. Jess and Rowan's 10K alpha bucks on hit. Yes.

Can I just let everyone know that it is doable if you're sitting there going, ah, feels so hard and everyone, no one's doing well. I mean, granted, she had a lot of practice, but we did a test run off air with the timer. And Jess got it, got 10 out of 10, probably in 20 seconds. Thanks, Rowan. It's actually, I love to. But you are right.

I have played for many years. But people tell me they play in the car every day. They play around the dinner table. Yeah. The kids love it. So they're playing, you know, in the car outside of the breakfast show. I really thought I'm going to hit, this is what I was thinking, guys. I was like, I'm going to hit Jess with the timer as she's doing it to stress her out a bit.

And I'll make it loud. It actually made it go quicker. And it can be done. It can be clearly done. What did you teach me this week? Diamonds are formed under pressure, baby. Well, diamonds also, pressure can also crack pipes. That's the thing.

Well, are you, well, this is the thing, are you a lump of coal or are you a pipe? It would appear I'm a lump of coal. But now I'm a diamond. Riley, are you a lump of coal or a pipe? Is the pressure going to crack you or turn you into a diamond? Oh, I don't know. I'm probably going to crack, but I'll give it a go. Now, Riley, what I'm going to ask you again?

Come on, mate. There is an answer I'm looking for. Come on, man. Riley, are you a lump of coal and is the pressure going to turn you into a diamond or you're a pipe and you're going to crack? Diamond. Yes. Yes. Riley, would you like to buy yourself some diamonds with our 10 grand or what's on your shopping list?

Well, it's hubby's birthday today. I actually haven't bought him anything yet, so hopefully he's not listening. So I would be calling him straight away. Amazing. I'm saying, what do you want to spend the money on, babe? You've clearly got company in the car. Can we have 30 seconds? I do.

I've got my two-year-old in the back, but I have called you guys eight times and never got through, and I'm surprised they got through. Okay, well, today's the day. We're motivated by hubby. I've got a two-year-old as well. I'm sure they'll be respectful of you just needing 30 seconds. Totally. This is a great omen for your Riley. Your letter's H.

H for hubby. Oh yeah, there we go. And for happy birthday, nice, Rowan. Your time will start after the first question. You're ready, Riley? Yep. Starting with the letter H, we need to name something you'd find in the bathroom. A hairdresser.

A fabric. Um, pass. A chocolate brand. Um, pass. A school subject? Um, uh, fuck. Um, honest. An instrument.

Humpet? A dip. A comedy film. What? What did you say for instruments? Did you say humpet or trumpet? No, I was thinking of a trumpet, but I didn't know if it was like an off-brained about it. So, so just, so Riley, just.

for you listening and everyone else listening. You can't just say a word and put the letter in front of it and think it's a thing. It's not a thing. To be fair. The hump, it's not bad. You know what? You know what? I'd rather that.

I'd rather that than a part. No, you can't pay it. But I appreciate that. Well, she didn't win, so it's fine. Go on your Riley. Thank you. Riley, sorry. Hubby's birthday present added your own back pocket, not ours.

Could have had hemp for fabric. Could have had Hershey's. Could have. Monica. You're not paying honours for school subject, are you? Just give her another one. Honours? That's not a subject.

Not a subject? No. I'm doing honours? You're not... Of what subject? Yeah, thank you. So two, okay. Fair enough.

Yes, you got hummus. Fair enough. I didn't get hummus. But yes, it can be done, can be one. Back again tomorrow, seven and eight o'clock. $10,000 each time. Look at this. H for Harry Styles.

Why is this? This happens every day, guys. New for breakfast, Jess and Rowan. Morning. This is Jess and Rowan. 13-1060. Be honest. Do you not really know?

What did I say about that bloody computer? Babs, was that you on teams messaging him? It was, yeah. Just write it in the phone box. No. No, because I bitch about us. It's like private stuff. What is it?

What is it? What did you say to him? Bring that shit. She goes, am I classified as an assistant producer? What did you? Say that again? She's clarifying her job title. Yeah, I'm doing some admin.

She's changing her email signature. I hear that one more time. Well, someone's calling Babs. It's fine to do your work. But answer. Pick it up. I'm watching you. I'll pick it up.

Not you. That's her job. Thank you. Lucky. She bet you do it. 13, 1060. Do you not really know what your partner does for work? I actually don't really.

I love it. So, well, you know what? You are with a chance to win our cooker of the week price. So basically, and I laugh because Lucy and I've been together about four years. Has she been in the same role the whole time? Basically. Oh, kind of bounces around back and a couple of jobs, same business. Right.

And she said to me the other day, well, someone said, what do you do for work? She was like, I'm a case manager. And I was like, why haven't I just said that to everyone the last four years? Yeah, but see, I don't really know what that means. I'm always like, oh, she kind of does a bit of this and a bit of there it is. And they go, so what is it? No, you know how you've headlined her to me. She's a great person.

Salt of the earth. Salt of the earth. You've described her to me finds homes for homeless people. And I get frustrated with dings on computers while I'm doing my job. You've got a lot going on over there. I appreciate a ding is going to upset you.

So glad I heard that. But thank you for being honest. Yeah. You've been with your partner four years and you don't really understand what she does and only recently learned the phrase case manager. I kind of understand what she does,

but I couldn't really describe it to people. That to me was exactly the same thing You just said. Okay, good, good, good. I met a new friend recently. I went to a, I went to a good mate's baby Sprinkle. You're familiar with the Sprinkle? No.

Sprinkle is a baby shower for a second child. Oh, I never, never heard that. You never heard that. So instead of having the big shabang baby shower, why do you have it twice? Just have it twice. Get more shit. Well, that's the thing.

People think that's a little vain. It's a little bit materialistic. But I'd still like, I'd still like to celebrate that another kid is coming. That's imposter syndrome. bells and whistles of a shower. So I went to a sprinkle. Now, I knew no one, but the expecting mother. So I had to get me charm on, make some friends with her friends at the sprinkle.

You're very good at that. Thank you very much. And I go deep. I go straight away, you know, what's keeping you up at night? Do you have children who gets them if you die? Have you sought that it out in your will? She's a grim. You ask it.

What? I don't, I don't want to say, I don't want to start with what do you do for work. It's a boring. You start with what's your after-death plan? Yeah. Okay, sure. You know, things like that. Really important stuff.

But once we get that all the way, it's fair enough to say, you know, well, what do you do for work? You know, what's going on in your day-to-day life? And this new friend who I was sitting opposite at the Sprinkle, she revealed, well, actually, big life thing happening for me in the next couple of weeks, I'm moving to Townsville. Did I? Can you just stay on top? Yeah, sorry, yeah, yeah. I'm moving to Townsville, packing up the family. We're moving up north.

I said, wow, what's taking you all the way up there? Hubby's work. Naturally, I ask. Naturally, shog on, man, I've been trying to do this story for freaking four days. Every time it gets derailed. What it was like, why did you send another team best? Jesus Christ. I was just doing it to be silly.

Do you not want to do this phone? Does no one want to do this? No, I really want to do it. Keep going. She's moving to towns, but what? What's taking you there, hubby's work? What does he do? She goes, I can't tell you.

I mean, is he a spy? Does he work for ASIO? What do you mean you can't tell me? She goes, no, no, no. It's not that I can't tell you like it's a secret. I don't know. Oh, okay. To uproot your whole family, including two small children,

and drive for days up our whole country. You'd have to worry about this. You don't know what he does for work. She goes, I think it's something to do with big pipes. Big pipes. And I was like, does he build big pipes? She goes, he might fix big pipes. Does he build them, fix them?

She doesn't. I don't know. She doesn't know. And I found it so amusing. She's moving the whole family, two small children. She's got her own business here. She'll relocate it up. But a whole switcheroo for a job.

She doesn't even know what he does. And you don't know this girl, really? No, I made her then and there. But she, mate. I met her then. And I know she has since moved. She's done the drive up. This lady's too trusting.

I would worry if I was her father, what the hell? Well, apparently he earns a pretty penny and the job is going to be. Oh, so he's loaded. He's loaded. So 131060, it's why I wanted, wanted to ask. Because there was a hairdresser. There was a hairdresser at the sprinkle and she goes. Cut's hair.

That's what she does. Yeah, that's easy. She goes, nah, no one knows what their partners do. I went, how many clients do you have who have also answered the question of, I don't know. I mean, that's pretty fair. I don't really know, but I kind of get it. 131060, do you not really know what your partner, your soulmate, does for a job?

Describe his fake job to us, 1060. Yeah, we'll try and guess. This is Jess and Rowan. On 131060, do you not really know what your partner does for work? I don't really. I mean, even my partner describes her job as a very broad job. People do broad jobs, but it makes sense. People do broad jobs, but you've got to wonder.

One thing for like your best, mate. It's another for your partner. I can't tell you what my mum does for work. She's still working? Yeah, she is. Oh, okay. She's contributing to the economy, babe. Yeah, good on her.

My mum works at legal aid is not a lawyer. So I can't understand that. You can't really say she's a legal aid worker. Well, she works at legal aid. But there's a whole bunch of other stuff people do, apparently. She could say she works in law. That's, she does. And you know, my in-laws both lawyers.

So she was like, well, I have plenty to talk about with Peter and Georgia now. I went, do you? I don't understand what you do. Like the sales here could be like, I work in media, but really they're sales. See, this is where we're getting at. Do you not really understand? Because maybe it is fake. But I met a girl at a baby sprinkle moving her whole family, herself, hubby, two small kids all the way up to Townsville.

And when I said, what's taking you there, hubby's job. What is it? Naturally, I said, what is it? She went, I don't know. She said, I can't tell you, which made me think he was a spy. No, she just doesn't know what he does. Works radio. Said something about pipes.

I went, you can't be moving your whole family. Queens and makes them, picks them, hudson. If you don't know. Lillia, good morning. Hello. Do you not really know what your partner does for a crust? Not really. He talks about like O rings and hydraulic stuff.

And I've got no bloody idea what it's about. Like, I've got an engagement ring. And that family ring I really know. He talks about O ring. Do you say, oh. And hydraulics? So like diesel fitter, turn out kind of stuff? Yeah, I called him a mechanic one day and he got really offended at it.

What? So not a mechanic, but yeah, did you guess plumber? I said plumber first, but if it's hydraulics, it could be something to do with... Is it like civil engineering? Well, I would say something... I think it's really big machines. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but not a mechanic, not a grace monkey.

Not a mechanic, not a mechanic. So, Lily, are you plan on marrying this person? You said there's an engagement ring. Like... Yeah. So, okay, just not, that's the least interesting thing about him is what I'm hearing. His work, yes. Yeah, exactly.

I love that. That happens. Yeah, that happens. Priorities. Sam, good morning. Morning, Sam. Hi, how you going? Yeah, we couldn't be better, babe.

Are you in this camp? Do you not really know what your partner does for work? No, I don't. He got a job in a factory. And when he first described to me what he does, my first instinct was to think of home. Simpson. Like a nuclear plant? Yeah, like he described it as sitting behind glass in a control room, but he has to move really

quick if a buzzer goes off. I just, I still don't actually know day to day what he does. Isn't it so funny, Sam? So obviously you had this conversation. Did you just get to a point where you're like, I've asked too many questions now? Yeah. I feel dumb for not understanding, so I'm just going to bail out. And for the last 12 years, I ask every now and then, and I still don't know.

Just trying to put it together. This is Jess and Rowan. How devery would it be, Rowan, to ask every time I enter this room for you to fire off my own personal theme song. That's more devarish than me getting bad to go get the pub. That's more devarish than you sending her out on the street to buy you. You want someone else to play you a theme song? Do you want someone to walk behind you and say, you're out of a human as well? What else do you want?

I want to keep my feet on the ground. My mum growing up would always say, you're getting a big for your boots, Jessica. So that's a way to certainly. burst a bubble, but something happened to me recently, Rowan, I think I deserve my own theme song. And it's this? Because never in my life have I felt like a bad a mamma jama shy guy. In something that happened recently. Okay, bad mama jama.

What did you know? My mother, speaking of, Lisa Pachioni, my mum and I took my two-year-old daughter on a little gal's three-generation vacation. Oh, yep. It was very nice. All right, it was bonding time for Nana Lee and Sweet Lucia. Yep. And we're in the Gold Coast, and we're walking up and down Caval Avenue,

trying to find somewhere for dinner. And Lucia spots these like... Oh, see then. Animatronic animal things you can ride around on. They're four children, obviously. You have an eye on on Caval Avenue. You've got to get on with cows. Yeah.

Well, there was cows. There was puppies. There was a couple of unicorns. I was iron off a unicorn. Totally. Absolutely would. And Lucia went, oh, I want to have a go on that, please. Yeah, yeah, yep, yep.

In her two-year-old speak. And my mum, very generous woman, said, absolutely, we weighed in line. It's busy at school holidays at this time. And the woman says to me, how old? She can't go on her own. She's too little. Fair enough. I said to my mum, do you want to have this experience?

Absolutely not. You'll be going on with Lutea. I think we got a puppy. Anyway, we're having a grand old time. Now, with my weight, wasn't exactly going super fast. They are for children. They're not heavy. No, but they are meant for children.

They're meant for children. So there were... You'd be a pretty heavy kid. That's true. If you're a kid, you're a kid, you're a kid. You're a kid. And it kind of has the... It's got like motorcycle river.

That's how you turn it up and off. Sick. So you're scooting around, but we're going very slow. But why I reference my weight slowing us down is because there were a couple of kids, Zoomin. In particular, one punk. And I would have said... Rowan.

What animal was he on? He was on a panda. Oh! He was pissing me offside guy. The panda man. This punk on a panda, he would have been. The punk on a panda. I reckon he was 11.

It's a very punky age. Punk age. Yeah. Punk age. And what this punk on the panda kept doing to everyone, but to me, no, to me and sweet Lucia, aiming his panda at my puppy and then swerving at the last minute. It's a bit of fun. It's a bit of fun.

I didn't care for it. I'm watching and doing it to the last one. a little girl on the unicorn. I watched him do it to another little boy on like a crocodile. And he did it to me three, four times. And you know me, I'm not like you. I don't like confrontation. Yeah, you don't at all.

But part the mama bear came out. I said, if he collides with me, if he doesn't swerve correctly, he might take out my puppy, which would knock out my two-year-old and myself. So I worked up every ounce of confrontation. in my body. What just had to him? And the next time he did it, I said,

stop that. I think he could just put your leg out. And I don't think it was well enough because he did it again. And then I hit him with, can you not? Can you not? Then he avoided me for the rest of the time.

I thought it was. Second, second, confrontation. Can you not? Because I feel like I got on his level, you know, stop. That was a bit, mum. So the first one was a bit pathetic.

What was a bit punk myself. And I felt bad. I felt good and I felt like I protected my kid. I'm not a bit, look, look, I wouldn't say standover kids. I feel like he just stood up. But you do need to yell. The punk did not respect me. He did not respect my stop.

I was giving him eyes when he did it the first three, four times. And he kept doing it. And the people, because I'm always looked at the adult in the room. I go, hello people who are running the thing. You look for the adults? I look for the adults. Where's the people running the thing? Found one.

You. I was in a car accident recently and I had to call my dad going, I don't know what to do. This is Jess and Rowan. Rowan, next week, Valentine's Day. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. We are doing something very fun for couples. We were just talking about gifts.

We were just talking about gifts. Love brainstorming things we can treat sweet Lucy. Of course. For our couples, we once had a dude come on to play. And he wasn't really. interested in the 10 grand, if we can be honest. He was more interested in racking up a score better than his partners. Funny.

She had played weeks earlier and his motivation was to walk away going, ha-ha, you got six and I got eight. Didn't really care about the 10 grand. So what we are doing, if you would like to be involved, partner one plays at seven. Yep. Partner two plays an eight. I like that.

Love that. I like it too. Still 10 grand on the table, guys. Yep, definitely. But more than anything, bragging rights. But you need to enter. Hit.com.com. You obviously, we've got to make sure you're both available and free,

so we need your deeds now. Now. Hit.com.com. You know what? I make it really easy. I'll put a little link in our story. Oh, yeah, great. And Rowan, make it really simple.

Click that. Leave us your deeds and our wonderful promotions manager, Danny. She'll get in touch. Yep. Make sure you're both free. We're doing it all week. Bit of fun. End of the week tomorrow as well.

The couple that is Jess and Rowan played. Yes. You can see the results. That'll be up on our Instagram shortly. Three guesses who wins. Give you one guess. You didn't need three. There's only two of you anyway.

That's true. If you say Rowan three times, you'll run. Shall I go? Anyway, a lot of fun to be had. Yes. And tomorrow. Giving away our cruise. Thank you to the Royal Caribbean.

That'll be awesome. Absolutely. Absolutely. And more code words throughout the day. Flip the tree. We drop back in a lot. A drive we drop back in. Oh, we do.

We do. You enjoy carrying Tommy? Oh, there me mates, Jess and Rowland. Oh, good one. They're back. Fabulous. All righty guys. See you tomorrow.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye. That was the Jess and Rowan podcast. The L Maco is back at MacKIs. Try the new race today.