Jim Cornette Experience - Episode 552: What Are We Doing Here?
Episode Date: October 5, 2024This week on the Experience, Jim talks about the average age of WWE & AEW's roster, Tony Khan & the Jaguars, Toni Storm & Stan Hansen, Grapplers Anonymous, ratings and much more! Plus Jim ...reviews AEW Dynamite Grand Slam & last week's WWE Smackdown! Follow Jim and Brian on Twitter: @TheJimCornette @GreatBrianLast Join Jim Cornette's College Of Wrestling Knowledge on Patreon to access the archives & more! https://www.patreon.com/Cornette Subscribe to the Official Jim Cornette channel on YouTube! http://www.youtube.com/c/OfficialJimCornette Visit Jim's official site at www.JimCornette.com for merch, live dates, commentaries and more! You can listen to Brian on the 6:05 Superpodcast at 605pod.com or wherever you find your favorite podcasts!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Like the midnight and the rock and roll.
He's in a fight for wrestling soul using a racket and some mind control.
He's Jim Cornett.
The keys to the future held by the past and with tag deep art.
The edition of the Jim Cornett experience today,
and you'll find out why I say that.
And joining me, for all of this hilarity,
Hawaiian Brian, the podcasting line,
the king of the Arcadian Vanguard podcast network,
Mr. co-host to you.
He'd been dazed and confused for so long.
It's not true.
The great Brian Last, everybody.
Aloha, Jim.
A pleasure to be here on your show.
Boy, that's what you got today.
I'll tell you what, and you've already been on me.
I'll have you know about my audio.
I've got a hum.
What?
You got a hum.
I was on you.
Yeah, I got a hummer there.
No, you've been on me verbally.
chastising me because I have a hum in my room.
Brian, you either need an ear doctor or a head doctor.
Because you're hearing these sounds all the time.
I can hear pitches and things that other people can't hear.
I have superhearing.
We've established this a while ago.
And it's also been declared by medical professionals.
Yeah, I think you should have heard the pitch that was coming at your head
when you got beaned at the ball game.
that may have been what caused this problem
was a long time ago
and already you're doing this to me
when my energy level is down
and we're both a little burnout
because the big Vince McMahon marathon
that we did several days ago
where we watched an hour
talked about it for an hour,
watched an hour, talked about it over for like a two-day period
and thank you everyone who has said
that our analysis of the documentary was more pithy than the documentary.
So then after we finished with that, we took, what, 36 hours off of watching wrestling and
talking about it.
And then we've started back.
And what we're doing today, folks, is this is the start of the podcast, but this is being
done last, because we've already done the last of the podcast, but that got into the editing
pipeline first, because we have to, of course, think of our audience on YouTube that would
rather get to some of the meat of the matter than undergo our introduction.
And it's all, we don't, I don't know what the fuck.
Are we coming or going?
Are we sideways or upside down?
We're just always there.
And you're in a coma today, too.
I'm not in a coma.
Come on, you're not giving me much and I don't have much.
So I have nothing to give.
So it's a two-way street.
just
one of those lanes
is closed for paving.
So anyway, today
what we're going to do since we talked about
Vince McMahon all over the place is
in this course of this podcasting
program, we're going to try to catch up on the last
several days of wrestling on television
and get some feedback from
the members of the cult of Cordette.
We neglected on your program
because we were talking about the
leader of the
cult of caca, Mr. McMahon himself.
And real quick here at the tarp, uh, tarp.
Here we're going to hear, I wish we were under the tarp, real here, real here, real quick here
at the top.
God damn it, you see what you've done to me?
I didn't have anything.
And now you've made it worse.
Here at the top, I just want to apologize.
We probably are going to have some audio issues, uh, from Jim's side.
There have been weather conditions in the area.
So obviously it affects the, uh, everything.
I'm not in fucking Asheville right now.
Bless those poor people down there.
I love Asheville.
It's a great place, and they just got slammed.
But my power went off, and it's obviously hindered my goddamn,
formerly gigabyte internet speed that I finally got from these people over at Spectrum.
I found the one knowledgeable employee at a 917 speed.
And then the power goes off,
and my internet speeds back down
and my goddamn laundry room light won't come on
and god damn other,
I'm telling you.
Is it connected to the internet?
Is it one of those smart lights?
No, it's a dumb fucking,
that's a dumb, stupid fucking light.
That every time the power goes off,
it takes five or six days
before it'll come back on.
It's a fluorescent type of apparatus.
Goddavin, are we on the air now?
We are back on the air.
We are back on the air.
the air. You told me to unplug
the thing.
What thing? You didn't mean right while we were
No, not in the middle of the show. I didn't say, I said if you want to reset it, you
could unplug it for 10 seconds. I didn't say do it right now.
You were saying, oh, he stopped the recording, ladies and gentlemen, because
I was cutting in and out. And he said, I'll check your speed
and my speed that was 900 and something is now 200 to something,
but my upload, the purple line, whatever
the fuck, my upload was 8.
and it's never been eight before.
It's always like fucking 38 or 42 or whatever.
So as I wonder,
if I unplug this router,
the new one they gave me,
like I used to unplug the other one in Stacey's room,
and blah, blah, blah.
So I unplugged, and the whole thing went out.
Couldn't even get on the Twitter.
I don't know what the fuck is happening here.
Can you hear me now?
Unfortunately, yes.
Because what did I just say now my upla after we plugged it back or I plugged it back in and everything came back on?
And you were wrong.
It wasn't eight.
It was six.
Well, it was six at one point, but it was eight the next time.
But now, instead of having 900 and something on the download or the download or the down low or whatever the kids say, I got 250.
But on the upload, instead of 40, I've got, what did I say, 120?
I've never even seen that number on this thing, but this whole thing is a crock of shit.
They just send you some numbers from Internet Central.
Let's tell him this today.
It bears no goddamn resemblance to what's really going on.
Nah.
Can we do the show now?
Did you hear any more roaring or...
What?
John Amos has passed away.
Oh, good Lord.
coming to America
and yesterday the guy
He passed away coming to him
He's already been here for 50 years
One of the stars of that movie
And of course good times
And yesterday one of the stars
of Beverly Hills cop
Passed away
Two recent deaths that you had not mentioned beforehand
Maybe I was trying to put them out of my mind
The curse is over
What
What do you mean the curse is over
Cursed a bunch of people
By mentioning them on the air
Then they all dropped dead
Oh I thought you meant
I should have mentioned that they died on the show before now.
This episode sucks.
Lazy Jen.
What are we doing?
I'm tired.
I'm worried it.
We got personal things going on.
You've got goddamn commitments up there.
I have by Stacy's mother's back in town, do her follow-up doctor's appointments
because the doctors that she has out at home, they're so unable to keep her out of the
fucking hospital.
So she's seeing these doctors and they're preparing to move out here by the first.
of the year. They've found a nice little place right down the road where everybody can keep an eye
on them. And they can keep an eye on everybody can keep an eye on each other. Instead of watching
wrestling all the time, we're all sick. We're sick people, Brian. We're sick. We watch this wrestling
and we're sick. These wrestling, I feel like Phil Mushnick now. These wrestling people are sick.
But they've made us sick, Brian. Don't you want to get well?
your audio still sucks
but when you say these wrestling people
who are these people that you're speaking of
that you're excluding yourself from
all of these people currently
in the wrestling they're the ones driving us
fucking bat shit
and my audio still sucks even with 120
upload well that's what it was before
I don't know if that's what it is now
run it in the background right now
and find out if it's still 100 it wasn't 120
it was 119 I'm not going to let you round up on that
we'll get by with it let's go to the cult
Can we go to the cult for some comments from the cult?
And by the way, thank you, jacked up Jeremy Bagley
for the birthday gifts he sent.
I actually didn't see him immediately because I thought it was Stacy's package
and I left her, she went out to California and flew back with her mom.
So I left and sent for a few days.
But he got me two volumes of Alex Ross,
art one Marvel 1 DC
which is just
hard back additions
the real nice stuff
they put some work into it
Jeremy Bagley is an all right fella
yeah here he has good audio
well maybe you'd like to do the show with him
the Jeremy Bagley experience
I don't know I don't know
or Jeremy's drive-through
oh actually that's not too bad
maybe we got some
something there. All right. We have an email here is what we got. Can you hear that? Yes.
Can you hear how many fingers I'm holding up? This is from, well, I won't mention his name because
he's mentioning some things about he might still have to interact with any of these people, but
he said, you know, we've been talking about who trained Daniel Garcia. I don't even remember
how it came up. How did that come up? We were asking who trained Daniel Garcia. It came
up either one of two ways. Either you were critiquing his in-ring work and I mentioned that I heard
it or it was in talking about, because we did a couple clips talking about him and contract
negotiations. But it was one of those two things. But it came out that one of his trainers was
Old Thurston Howell the third over at Russell Business of Statistics of what is their name?
WrestleMania, otherwise known as wrestle business of statistics.
God damn it.
Okay, people, this is the fucking blooper reel from now on this fucking show.
I don't know what to tell you.
I'll say something silly here in a minute and it'll be funny.
But anyway, this fucking guy here from this place in New York wrote an email.
I spent some time in wrestling school in Buffalo around.
2016, and at the time there were three groups and two schools.
Sounded like a full house.
One of the schools closed and the other rebranded,
and the third group is now Nickel City Wrestling.
Nickel City Wrestling.
They couldn't even, not even a dime?
I mean, what can you get with a nickel anymore?
So anyway, he continues on this unnamed fellow.
The school that stayed open became grass.
Grapplers Anonymous.
What?
That's the name?
Oh, wait, not anymore.
They've changed it again.
But let's just stop and settle on that one for a minute.
Grappler's Anonymous.
That should be a real thing.
I got some people I could recommend.
Yes, they all ought to sit in a fucking circle and go by their first name and
support each other and getting away from this fucking shit.
Would you go to a school?
Grappler's Anonymous.
And now, but listen to this,
now I believe they're called Grapple Pro.
Not to be confused with Snapple Orange or whatever.
Okay, when I was around,
the real head trainer was a guy named Mikey every night.
An incredibly small but nice fellow who can't go to Canada
thanks to a pimping charge from the early 2000s.
Well, hold on.
Stop right there.
incredibly small.
An incredibly small but nice fellow.
An incredibly small pimp.
Mikey every night he's training,
he went from pimping,
pimping hose nationwide, I guess,
to training wrestlers.
Mikey every night.
So,
I'm just,
why would you go to a wrestling school
and have a midget named Mikey
that you've never heard of,
So here I'll teach you how to wrestle
Because he's got women
And Mikey's always surrounded by a bunch of women
Only if you get to wrestle the women
Well you know you don't realize
That he's going to charge you until you
You know a few weeks into the school
And you drop a few thousand dollars
And it's like hey can you introduce me to your friend
Who's always flirting with me
Yeah that'd be 50 bucks across the border
Well fuck I'd rather pay the 50 than the 2000
At least I'd know I was getting what I was paying for
With the
He didn't say small
He said incredibly small
Incredibly small.
The incredible shrinking wrestler.
I can't believe how small this man is.
It's incredible.
It's incredible.
Every time I look at him, he gets littler.
But now, wait, this goes on.
Incredibly enough.
The guy in charge, as I remember, was meant to be Pepper Parks.
Oh, but he was on the road and got signed to T&A as Braxton.
Sutter and eventually became the baker after training the butcher.
You remember the butcher of the baker and the candlestick maker.
I didn't realize that that was the butcher's trainer, though.
That's interesting.
And Les Thatcher trained a guy named, had a guy working for him named Pepper Parks in the late 90s, certainly to God.
What?
I think it's the same guy because I believe Les Thatcher at some point a long time ago mentioned
him to me or I heard him say something.
Same guy.
Well, he looked completely different 25 years ago
because I would have I would have not known
but nevertheless so he was supposed to be the trainer
but instead we got the incredibly small wrestling fellow
and then he said I believe Garcia started there with that group
and was around when my life happened and I moved home
but he says Thirst and Howl would teach the boys
what to expect to get paid and how to ask for it
That's a course at wrestling school?
Apparently now, as well as some technical and chain wrestling.
The technical and chain wrestling that Garcia does when he tries,
but he's too small for it to look good on TV.
Boy, these wrestlers anonymous meetings sound like a real party.
Here's how you get paid.
Here's how you ask for it.
Let me teach you some chain wrestling.
Is there a special way you're supposed to ask me?
Wait a minute, do you go in, walk up, two steps to the left, drop to one knee, hold out your left hand supported by your right arm at the forearm, and say, please, sir, may I have my pay?
It has been a pleasure working for you. I expect my pay now.
In three, two, please put payment here now.
All righty.
With all due respect, what is Brandon Thursday?
is it just someone like working the Indies up in upstate New York that he would be suggesting to, I don't know. Why is that a course? I didn't know he, I don't know what, what's going on over there. I really don't.
Grapplers Anonymous, not wrestlers Anonymous, grapplers Anonymous. Well, there could be, they could be wrestling or they could be grappling or just shoving, pushing and shoving a little bit. You need to, you need to have somebody help support you through that.
Grapp was Anonymous, which was then rebranded as AEW Dynamite.
All right, I will speak.
You're funny.
You mentioned that, and you have no foreknowledge, young Brian, of the topic of the next email,
but you have led to it beautiful.
Why don't you do segways like that when we do these goddamn commercial spots?
You leave me hanging to the last second on what the fuck where we're going, and this was perfect.
That's not true.
I do them great.
They're perfect when I do them.
Well, there he says.
It was a perfect phone call.
A guy I'm going to call Sam
Because he says I'm Sam
But I'm not going to even say where he's from
Because I don't want to narrow it down too much
Although I guess there's a lot of Sam's
It's a biggest city and estate
I don't want to get this guy in trouble
But what the hell's going on? What did this guy say?
Well he is who he says he I don't know
He is Sam
He is indeed Sam
He is Sam I am
No I'm confirming
He is
He says he is.
All you said was he's Sam.
I don't know what...
I want my green eggs and ham, said Sam.
Sam I am.
His name is Sam.
He's from a major city and he works for a professional sports franchise.
All right.
We've established this.
I don't want to get any heat on him just in case.
You never know how these fucking...
Could be like Costanza and the fucking Yankees.
Now, this could be anything from a baseball team to like an arena football team, right?
He said a professional sports...
franchise. We're not trying to, we're not playing
what's my line with this guy. We don't want to get him fired
potentially. See, that would be fun though. We need people to play
what's my line with us on the air. But not to get fired.
But it has to be some kind of consequence. There's got to be
truth or consequences then. Bring back, that's right. That's right. Everybody
says Price is right with Bob Barker. Fuck that truth or consequences
was goddamn. Anyway, he's, his name is Sam
and he works for a professional sports franchise.
And he says, I have also been a member of the cult since 2018.
Tony Kahn works in professional sports too,
so I thought you'd like to know how we view him in his role
with the Jacksonville Jaguars.
I know you guys don't follow pro football closely,
so the main thing you need to know about the Jaguars is that they're a joke.
They have an overall record of 60 and 100,000.
38 under the con administration and are currently the worst team in the NFL to start the
2024 season.
And I mean, I don't know that much about football, but I would assume that a record of 60 and 138 is not
by any means one of the upper echelons of teams, correct?
No, they're 0 and 4 so far this year, and we've talked about since AEW, you know,
you pay attention a little bit to the other sporting enterprise.
of the con family, we've talked about the fact that
Jaguars, I mean, not a good reputation. They could lose
games. They had the one coach that they fired
for drinking with girl, whatever to fuck that seed was.
For drinking a girl? They caught him on video like at Hooters or something.
Like some bar, like with a couple of girls just drinking when he was
supposed to be with a team or whatever it was. One of many issues.
They had the guy who stole millions of dollars right under their no-beck.
Well, well, hold on here. We're going to get to him in a second
because Sam continues, the Jaguars fans routinely show up to games dressed as clowns
or with paper sacks covering their faces.
The Jaguars are the cons continually make baffling personnel decisions in their front office
and in hiring coaches.
Perhaps worst of all, they continually ruined the free agent market for the other 31 NFL
franchises by routinely overrequently over.
paying to a ludicrous amount players who should in no way command the most lucrative
salaries in the league.
Parenthetically sounds familiar, yes?
They do it in football too.
And he says, almost all of this is due to Tony Kahn, who runs their analytics and scouting
departments by virtue of being appointed to that role by his father.
Tony also let someone under his supervision embezzle incredible amounts of money from
the team.
I don't think I could explain how every other executive in the NFL was either
befuddled or slightly embarrassed, seeing him in a movie prop neck brace trying to k-fab
and attack by the buckaroos, jungle jack, and Okada during the NFL draft.
None of them think AEW is anything more than a vanity project for a know-it-all goof
who picks fights with former players on Twitter.
when they tell everyone what a joke his football organization is compared to other teams.
He's doing this on Twitter in the football world, too?
I didn't know that.
I remember in the past there were some things with him and football players going back and forth,
but that was a few years ago.
I don't know what he's actively doing, though.
Well, now, okay, maybe this was former behavior.
Maybe he did that before he got the wrestling company.
We got football fans in the audience.
and if somebody is familiar with the
the NFL Twitter, what'd they say
that time that they were on right before a fucking NBA game
and they said, oh, NBA Twitter has discovered
that Chris Jericho is still wrestling and it's not complimentary.
Well, if there's NFL Twitter
and you people are on it, let us know what fuck Tony is doing
comparable to his behavior in the wrestling space
as the kids say.
But anyway, Sam goes, oh, go ahead.
No, no, I thought that was the end.
If you have more, keep going.
No, no, no.
Sam is going on.
Yeah, so I'm trying to find my spot.
It's a giant one paragraph.
Ah, here we go.
The NFL does give wrestling a lot of credibility,
but they want to exclusively work with WWE
because they have the actual stars.
Nobody bats an eye when Tony Kahn has his wrestlers
at Jags games.
And then he also tells the story of the guy.
Remember Trevor Lawrence is the player that got hurt on the Jaguars.
And they couldn't find him a cart to carry him back to the locker room.
On TV, they had two trainers help him hobble back to the locker room.
And they just signed this guy to a contract extension worth $50 million a year.
is what Sam is saying,
but they couldn't find a fucking cart.
So when they,
when they limped him off the field,
it further exacerbated the knee injury.
So anyway,
but that is,
he closes with pro football and pro wrestling to Tony Kahn.
Seems just like a hobby.
He's not even in the same business
as people who are trying to win championships
and make money.
And there, you know,
is from another world.
The nether world of real pro sports is,
what the fuck are they doing?
Well, you know, I've said it before.
The con fortune is from Shad Khan's patents.
It's not from starting a business
and building a business just based on business expertise.
It was from having an asset like a patent.
Well, I'm certainly...
An asset that every single car was going to need.
So you were going to make lots of money.
They put that money into various hobbies.
And not everyone has the organizational skills or the people to put an organization together
to run a major sporting franchise.
It's a tough thing.
And we've seen, at this point, many sons of billionaires strike out on a very public stage
because they think they know everything.
and it's clear that they don't.
If Tony Khan manages the Jaguars,
just the analytics and the drafting,
anywhere close to how he manages the wrestling side,
that's pretty scary.
If you're a fan of the Jacksonville Jaguars,
how do you have any confidence in your team?
I know what that's like.
We had Jeff Wilpon, the Tony Conner baseball.
It was rough.
But how do you have any faith?
If you know anything about wrestling
and you're a Jaguars fan, you'd know what's up.
what is his
weak like
how can he be on top of
anything if he's at the NFL
draft and he apparently they're saying that he's
you know giving out the salaries
so he's doing these contracts in football
and he's running the wrestling company
he's booking this thing and he's goddamn
doing angles
and he's you know tweeting
and I know he's a thin fellow, but he's got to eat once in a while.
Sleep, I guess, is out of the question.
Maybe that's why his decision-making capabilities may be suffering.
But what?
And I bet he's on the board of directors of some kind of charitable organization, too, with his spare time.
The NFL drafts like the biggest thing every year for.
an NFL team. You're building for the future.
They've got their most serious people there. They spend a lot of time planning it.
Tony Kahn's there in a neck brace with his dad, who's the owner of the team just giggling and
smiling. His dad, who was overseen this franchise falling into the toilet with Tony Kahn,
if he's in charge of the drafting and finding new players, and he's spending as much time as we
already know he is spending on AEW, that may be the answer as to what's wrong with the Jacksonville
Jaguars, or one of the reasons that there are so many problems, because Tony Kahn thinks he knows
it all, and he keeps adding more and more stuff to his plate.
Well, I mean, dude, do we know, is this public knowledge, because you talked about the patents,
is he getting, he meaning Shad, too many pronouns, pal, but the, the senior con, does he get
like a percentage every time they make
a fucking car bumper or did he
sell this shit outright or is he still
like making
billions of dollars on an
ongoing basis that he just don't give
a fuck ever, ever?
Yeah, I think that's pretty much it.
Let me see.
Hey, can you send me an instruction manual
on how to make a fucking car bumper?
And then fuck all of you. You'll never see my fat ass
again. He received a 50,000
loan from the small business administration
and $16,000 of his own savings
were used to start his own company
Bumper Works in 1978.
In 1980,
he bought his former employer
Flex and Gate
and then
he...
Wait a minute, wait a minute, hold on now.
So in two years, he
starts his own company and in two years
he buys his former employer.
He bought them out and
Son of a bitch. Maybe he's smart except what he's got the blind spot for the progeny, but go ahead, I'm sorry.
Well, he's smart when it comes to making something that other people are going to need.
The company grew under Khan so that it supplied bumpers for the big three automakers.
In 1984, he began supplying a small number of bumpers for Toyota pickups.
By 1987, it was the sole supplier for Toyota pickups.
And by 1989, it was the sole supplier for Toyota pickups. And by 1989, it was the sole supplier.
for the entire Toyota line in the United States.
Adopting the Toyota Way increased company efficiency and ability to change its manufacturing
process within a few minutes.
Since then, the company has grown from 17 million in sales to an estimated $2 billion in 2010
and $8.89 billion in 2020.
What the fuck.
So in 2020, they have...
At $8.89 billion in sales, and it's his company.
So the money's never going to run out, and it's to the point where you could throw it against the wall and just do stupid things and let your son just do stupid things.
Well, speaking of stupid things, we've talked about the forearm exchanges, right?
The trading, the fake, phony forearms, if you prefer the alliteration.
And I asked some people to send in some comments on it if they could that we're inside the business to help us understand why that anybody thinks this is a good idea, right?
And why they don't realize it looks like shit.
And we got a number, but I wanted to excerpt, see what I did with that word there, a few of them that it kind of again goes back to what we were talking about before with the incredibly small man.
at Grappler's Anonymous, the trainer, right?
That's the problem, I believe,
is that too many of the people that are training these days
are remarks to begin with.
Anyway, this guy over and over said,
this is my real name, so I think he wants plugged.
So he don't care if he gets some heat or not.
He's my kind of guy.
Of course, he needs to work on the name.
His name is key.
Breddle.
Did you capture that, Brian?
Keegan Brettel.
Not Brittle.
No, not brittle.
Breedle.
Keegan Brettel.
And I'm a professional wrestler in Australia.
That is my real name and working name.
And I hope this gets heard because this needs to be addressed.
Yeah, I think he wants his name out.
Well, and my advice is going to tell him to tuck it back in.
Because if it's his real name, I'm sure his parents.
are wonderful people, but he needs a new working name.
Because people are going to have too much, what the fuck to that?
But nevertheless, he says, I was taught how to throw a punch in my first few weeks of training
by the Aussie wrestler Jay Law and then had it drilled in again when I trained with Lance Storm.
I've been wrestling for 10 years, and the amount of people who do not know how to throw a punch is insane.
The big company here locally, PWA, this is in Australia now,
apparently only teaches forearms because it's been said that it is safer.
I found this out last week when I was talking to one of their trainees at a football game.
What's even crazier is that most new prospects and trainees go to this place
because of their reputation as the biggest school around.
So at any one time they could have 40 people training in a session,
and they're all throwing shitty forearms.
And apparently, this other email gives some insight in this,
it's the entire, it's the Japanese fighting spirit deal
is what they're trying to do because Cole says,
it talks about the Japanese culture, the samurai,
the videos of Bruce Lee meditating, getting hit with Kendo sticks,
but he doesn't feel it because he's in another,
plane, you've seen that shit, Brian.
You're a Bruce Lee aficionado.
Yeah.
And these fucking dip shits think they're doing
that.
Or giving that impression or showing
a fighting spirit
when they're standing there fake
fucking
poofing each other.
You can't call it fake striking because it's not
even really fake striking.
Fake striking is throwing a working punch
or a working forearm that looks
like it's a goddamn forearm.
and he says with the uh basically with great sportsmanship you challenge your opponent to hit you because he can't hurt you
and you're going to prove you're tougher than him and have more fighting spirit 72 times so that's where
they're and you know a lot of them try to imitate the fry takiyama fight cole mentions that also
Remember they just grabbed each other and just started fucking punching each other.
But it...
That was what Owens and Generico used to do all the time.
Yeah, but this...
None of this looks like that either, does it?
Am I just an old man with foggy memories sitting by a fireplace?
Or did it look like Fri and Takiyama were just punching each other as hard as they could?
It looked like that because the guys doing the forearms look like they're cooperating with each other,
not hurting each other, and it's just like a weird dance.
and Cole says
I would also argue
the reason strikes end up looking soft or weak
on high definition television
is because in front of 200 people
at the VFW hall
you don't have to work so snug
and bad habits are formed
over the years on the Indies
that bite you in the ass on national TV
and then nobody sells it
because again you can cover up
a bad whiff of a strike
if it's a Bobby Eaton
fucking whoosh and it's a Riggie Morton
sell anyway. You can't tell
the difference but
you can hit people and if you don't sell it
it looks like shit. That's the old saying about the
goddamn old timers. Their punches look like shit and hurt
because they hadn't perfected the
modern era yet.
Here's another one, Michael, from West Virginia.
As a former professional wrestler,
the forearm and chop exchanges are ridiculous.
During my training in 2004,
if I would have tried anything like that,
I would have been stretched until I broke.
Vicki, he was trained by Bart and Brad Batten,
the Batten Twins.
And so,
standing there, allowing some dumbass to hit you
with useless strikes
doesn't tell a story. It doesn't present a struggle.
It doesn't make someone like you or hate you.
It's just filler crap that guys do and they have no idea what to do to continue the match.
I was taught to grab a hold if I got lost,
but I guess that's the difference between actually being trained to wrestle
versus shown how to perform.
And finally,
Damien Wayne, haven't seen him in forever.
Hello, Damien.
He says, hey there, guys, this is it Damian Wayne.
I'm an independent wrestler and I think this shit sucks ass.
I hate fake-looking shit, and I absolutely hate no-selling shit.
If Terry Funk can sell everything, so can you.
I preach being believable, and people look at me sometimes,
like I'm speaking a foreign language.
So that's more succinct about the whole thing.
But even people in a business know it's fucking stupid,
and they still do it.
There are these other people, not these people that know it's stupid,
but the other people still do it.
Too many thays.
It's a lazy thing.
It's a lazy crutch for guys who can't put together creative matches.
You know what it does, Brian?
What's that?
It gives me fucking, it just, the sour belches.
It just gives me gas.
Because it gives me poor gut health is what it does.
And you know, poor gut health, it's the next step to the fucking graveyard.
You know that for a fact.
If, if, I'm telling you're not pooping every day,
And you don't have the proper
Germanology and microbiology down there
and your stomach churning around,
producing all the effluvia that goes into the septic tank
of your system that keeps you pure and clean
and sparkling like a freshly deused New Orleans whore?
I'll tell you whether you're in bad shape,
because you're going to be, it's the next step, folks, to the grim reaper.
Gut health emanates to have a gut health
skin health, heart health, immune health, your gut microbial balance and your micronutrient
synthesis, if you ain't got all that working together, you might as well pack it in and leave
everything to your wife. Well, if you're a woman, you might as well leave everything to your
husband unless you're married to another woman. You might as well just kiss your ass goodbye
because you're on a road to death. You know that as well as anybody, Brian. You had to
What the hell does that mean?
Well, you had to reform your intestinal tract to make sure when you found out about our friends over at Seed and their DSO-1 mixture,
the capsules that you can take every day with a glass of water is your daily habit
and prevent your entire stomach from rotting like a neglected septic tank,
you had to refo—because you were eating all that French toast.
and all that French toast
ferments, Brian.
And that's why you were fermenting.
You were turning a light shade of lime green.
As a result of the fermentation of the French 102,
you got on, that's part of skin help.
You got on the DSO1, the two and one probiotic and prebiotic
that promotes benefits in and beyond your gut
and instantly you became the proper color again.
And you didn't have that abdominal bloating.
Remember the time you were leaving that Costco and that security guard tackled you because he thought
that your abdominal bloating was you were trying to shoplift a watermelon?
You remember that?
No, that never happened.
I don't even go to Costco.
I don't know what the hell you're talking about.
Well, you were trying to get, he thought you were trying to get away with something, but he saved
your life there.
Because with that abdominal bloating, well, again, the next step is the abdominal explosion, where
you spray all kinds of innards and gizzards all over.
people. So you were raised, I'm surprised when he tackled you, you didn't pop. But you were able to get on
the DSO-1 and you were able to reduce that. And remember, remember that intermittent constipation,
Brian, that you were telling me about a couple years ago? I have never told you about it, because I've
never had it. What are you talking about? Well, it was intermittent. You didn't have it until you did,
but then it quit for a while. I didn't know. And I wouldn't talk to you about any of these issues
if they actually existed.
See, the DSO-1 is formulated with strains clinically validated.
Clinically validated, ladies and gentlemen, that's better than proof.
To reduce the abdominal bloating and intermittent constipation,
they support clear, healthier-looking skin, you'll glow.
People, you'll glow like you're pregnant.
If you're a 50-year-old man with a big belly and a beard,
you might not want people to think you're pregnant,
but you're going to look like it.
And feel like it, too.
Why don't you get those cravings for pickles and ice cream?
But if you need further proof, ladies gentlemen, what I'm saying about Brian Last is true.
81% of, 81% of members, member, they call you a member.
When you take these DSO1 capsules every day, you'll become one of them, right?
One of these seed people.
Not pod people now, but seed people.
81% of members felt less sluggish after meals
because boy, once you eat that meal,
it's coming right back out, right the other direction.
The pathway is clear.
And 87% of members feel more in control
of their whole body health
since they started the DSO-1 experience.
And so I say, can I say more
if it worked for Brian last
and brought him back from the brink of death,
then certainly it can make you feel better and poop with a more confident air.
If you want to be healthier, if you're looking for gut healthy,
you're looking to all around, all over, just live a healthier lifestyle,
seed is a component for you.
Because from little small seeds, mighty acorns grow,
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But right now, I'll tell you what's not a problem.
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All you got to do is go to seed.com slash JCE and use the promo code 25JCE. See, you get 25% off by using the code 25JCE.
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out. Seed.com slash JCE code 25JCE at 25% off first month and by then you're going to be you're
going to be hooked on this stuff I mean it's like a monkey on your back you're going to feel so good
you're going to you're going to look better you're going to have the glow you're going to
again you'll be unstoppable in the bathroom baby this ad is unstoppable but see one more time there it is
what what do you want to know what the promo code is
What's that promo code?
25 JCE.
25 JCE.
Yes, say it all together.
25 JCE.
I'm sorry to talk a little over you.
What I meant to say was 25 JCE.
That's what I said.
Bunny bread.
With seed.
Yes, with seed.
Do you remember that commercial or is that a southern thing?
That's what I said, bunny bread.
That's a southern thing maybe.
You've got bunny bread up there, don't you?
I never even heard of that until.
What kind of fucking heathens are you?
You don't have, you can't go to the store in New Jersey and in the year 2024 and get a simple loaf of bunny bread.
Maybe you can't.
I've just never purchased it and never paid attention to it or seen it.
Is there a picture of a bunny rabbit on it?
Yes.
That's what I want on my bread.
A picture of a fucking rodent hopping on.
A rabbit is not a rodent.
A rabbit is a mammal.
A friend of the rodents.
A cute, furry
little thing
with pink nose
Big teeth to give you rabies
They eat carrots and give you love
And I'll tell you what else can give you some love
Jump in front of your car
Oh come on
So they do they don't have any respect for the driver
Well you should be on the lookout
Because they don't they're color blinds
They can't see the lights of the stoplight
See
The lights of the stoplight
You didn't think about it
that, did you?
Well, I mean, they can, I guess not.
Yeah.
I didn't think about it.
You're right.
You're right.
I did not think about that at any way.
Well, see, if you, if you can't, if you can't just goddamn keep part of your mind on the
rabbit's rights in this day and age, then what kind of racist, son of a bitch are you?
Rabbits rights?
Rabbit's rights.
I was going to talk about real quickly and we'll get on with this program.
Seed.
Seed.
We talked about seeds.
a while back.
Now we're going to talk about me
and Jimcordet.com
and the holiday sale at Cornett's collectibles
that I will quick,
because when does this show come out?
Are we going to release this thing?
I don't know.
This actually going to the public.
When will this show be finished?
I have no idea.
We don't know.
We don't know.
So nevertheless, then, in that case,
October 5th at noon Eastern, Saturday,
that's when the sale started,
if you don't hear this till after that.
And we encourage you to go,
because it's a holiday sale.
It's going to Christmas.
And boy, howdy, the brand new and final.
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You can see pictures at Jim Cornett.com.
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all the information at Jim Cornett.
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our other fine merchandise and hotchka's feather bottom is standing by waiting to hear from you
jim cornet dot com all right seed yes so speaking of seed again
see i'm going to transition this somehow
You know what?
When you plant something and it starts growing and it gets bigger and it gets older
and then it gets so old sometimes it can't fulfill its fucking purpose anymore.
See, that's the case.
There's a cycle of life to the plants and to the animals and et cetera, right?
So I've successfully segues into asking you,
if you have the information that I've been told has become available
of a comparison of the average age of the AEW and WW
wrestlers on their roster to see who's the
youth revolution and who's the old-timers in this business
these days.
Well, we do have something here.
This was something posted this past week by WrestleMania.
They're on Patreon.
The median age wrestler for TV and pay-per-view events
for both AEW and WW
since 2000,
according to
they pulled the data from Cage Match.
Is Cage Match an unimpeachable source
like Facebook and Wikipedia?
I think for data
that is an opinion
data that is an opinion driven.
Data is not driven by opinion.
It may be a fine source.
Did that answer your question?
Yes, yes, it's fine, it's fine.
What was your other question?
Well, how do you want to explain this to you?
So, so, this comparison is over time.
Where did they start out five years ago or whatever it was?
What was the average age of the AEW wrestler?
And what was the average age of the WW wrestler?
Okay, now this is AEW in 2019.
And this counts pay-per-views, dynamites, and later collision and rampage.
In 2019, the average age was 31.7 years.
Uh-huh, and where was WWE at in that period of time?
And that period of time, W.W was 33.8 years, and NXT, for the record, was 30.4 years.
So, at that time, and I would have thought that AEW would have even skewed
a little bit younger because of all the not ready for primetime period,
players they started signing there but then of course
Jericho's on the roster so that's got to lift the whole fucking thing up what 10
percentage years
him being
AARP and all but okay so 31 to 33
two years
to the younger for AEW
in 2019
in 2020
AEW's average
wrestler age was 32.2
years with
W.W.E at 35.3 years
and NXT at 31.7.
Well, see, now, the only thing that makes sense is NXT.
Because in one year,
the average age in AEW only went up a half a year,
but the average age in the WW went up
a fucking two years.
So that must mean that working for the WW in the last couple of years
the Vince McMahon administration aged you more quickly than normal.
Well, we go to 2021.
I guess we should say 2020 was during the pandemic.
But 2021 AEW, the average age of the wrestler was 34.6.
There's a pretty big jump on here.
W.W.E's average age was 35.8.
NXT. 31.2.
So now,
WWE only increased a half of a half a year.
NXT went down,
and AEW jumped 2.4 years.
So now we're almost,
the WVE, and I know NXT,
but, you know,
for intents and purposes for what I'm going for,
we're about to meet in the middle.
The WWE and AEW,
they're about to meet in the middle here
if we keep going at this pace.
All right, well, the pace brings us to 2022.
AEW's average wrestler age was 33 years old.
WWE's 35.1 year, or one years, 35 years and one month.
NXT, 28.5.
Oh.
And remember, you know, I've got to remember the timeline,
but a lot of NXT's top guys
left, Adam Cole,
Keith Lee,
you know, various people
who were on top there all of a.
a.m. TV. Well, and that's
why the age may be increasing
over in AEW, but now they've
stopped that. They backed up
1.6
years while
WWE
backed up
seven
is this, would this be months?
Seven tenths of a year. I don't know what
the fuck. The point is
WWE backed up, but
NXT dropped
almost three years.
We now go to 20, what are we,
2023.
3.
AW Dynamite or AW's
overall wrestler age, the median,
35.4 years.
WWE
35.1.
Oh!
NXT 28.3.
So now
the WWE held exactly steady
AEW increased 2.4 years
and AEW has now surpassed
the WWE by 3 tenths of a
whatever the fuck and
NXT dropped another two tenths.
And finally, 2024, the year we are currently in,
so this is not complete.
AEW's average age, 35.7.
W.W.
34.7
Nxte 28.4.
NXT is
for three years, been between
283 and 285
and now
AEW has surpassed
WWW by one year
exactly 35.7
to 34.7.
It's crazy when you look at the
WWE at the end of the attitude era
and just as the roster got,
as the roster aged.
2000, average age 29.7,
2001, 29.7,
2002, 30.4,
2003, 31.5.
So, I mean, it was literally that crew from the late 90s getting older.
But here's something that, again...
Look at how young they were on average.
That's...
Remember when we...
I think it was the first year that AEW started up.
when again the AEW fans and there were more of them then
and more of them were on me before they found out that many of the things that
we said were going to come true
but oh you like you would only push old guys push old guys
and we went back and showed that when I was booking Smoky Mountain Wrestling
that the people that I booked in my main event spots were actually younger
than Kenny Omega and a young bucks
and one or two other of their
you know, top guys at that particular point in time
and that pretty much if you looked at my whole roster at the time,
if you took Bob Armstrong out of the equation
because he was in his 50s at that point,
that across the board it was as young or younger than AEW.
Chris Candida or in 1993.
was fucking four was 21, 22 years old.
And so there's just this, these people that couldn't understand,
of course I booked these guys, 30 years ago,
you fucking morons, wouldn't they were 30 years younger?
They couldn't compute with them, but you get to fucking point.
Well, the other thing was people looked older.
Everyone always flips out when they realize how old Dennis Conjory was in Mid-South
or Jim Crocker.
because he was 10 years older.
He was 32.
Dennis Condry was younger.
In Crockett promotions in 1986,
Dennis Condry was younger now
than the average age of the AEW wrestler.
But they looked like they were full-grown adult fucking men,
which therein lies another one of the problems.
But that's...
The point of the matter is that
AEW was the
you know the supposedly
the youth movement here but basically
he's either signed the
guys and kept them all this time
and they're
they've aged five years
which is about what his fucking average is
and that's true
I mean how many is he get rid of or when he does
sign guys it's been
of late
or talent I should say guys and girls
people that
have come from or already had to run in
the WWE, and so they're going to be several years older.
And meanwhile, the WWE is, you know, not only trying to make and find new stars,
but I would think that if you took Orton and a couple people out of this equation,
the roster, the average would be younger than that, but obviously nobody's advocating
taking taking Orton off the roster.
But I'm just saying a few of those guys can still go skew that even further.
They've made new stars.
We also don't know if this is men and women, right?
Well, you just read it to me.
Wrestlers, I'm trying not to be sexist, but I don't,
I don't give fuck particularly if the women are included anyway,
because it matters not in the overall point.
but I'm trying not to be misogynistic.
All right, well, I mean, it's interesting.
It's interesting just because, you know, the Nigel Danielson match kind of makes me think of it.
You know, for the fans of Ring of Honor who attended the shows or bought the DVDs at that point,
that match was a big deal.
But these guys and those fans are aging out.
And like you said, WWE is already working.
on and creating the next generation,
AEW gets their castoffs.
It doesn't know what to do with them.
And then when they get young people,
they either choose the wrong people to get behind
or they don't know what to do
and how to bring someone.
They can't make someone a star
and the people who look like they have star potential
can get pushed in AEW,
but like a Jade Cargill
once they get to WWE,
it's like, holy shit.
Like this is a completely different thing.
what I was doing there wasn't serious.
Well, but also,
I understand the point you're making
and I agree with it, but here's
another problem, let me add this on,
more that
because I remember
a memo that Bill Watts
sent out to all the guys
in Mid-South,
that he had dictated to Jim Ross
because it was J.R.'s handwriting and he just
X-R. took it down.
Gentlemen,
I know all
you are superstars and all and he would put in quotation marks all of you are
superstars quotation marks and all quotation marks of our fans know everything in
quotation marks about you and your gimmick but for the sake of it let's explain it every time
we need to every time you have a gimmick match explain the rules in your interview talk about
the rules. How is this match won or lost? If it's a street fight dress in street fight clothes,
if it's tape, fist match, tape your fucking fist up. Make it obvious for people to understand our
program and what we are trying to sell them. That's paraphrasing all of that, but a lot of it's a
quote. And it's same thing Gary Hart used to say, repetition is the key. Repetition is the
key when dealing with goofs.
He was talking about
trying to get
little John Harris to remember
the finish at Texas Stadium.
But repetition
is the key when you are selling
something to the public
because in case we all haven't noticed
a lot of the fucking public
ain't very fucking swift.
And so you
can't assume
that everybody, when you're on
national television,
knows everything that happened in Ring of Honor in a Manhattan Center 20 years ago, or in Japan, at the Yokohama Arena, 15 years ago.
Because they don't, not on national TV. If this was tape trading, if this was the segment of diehard fans,
that was watching Ring of Honor on HDNet when Cuban still owned it,
or was trading for the Japanese tapes before New Japan World,
or going to Ring of Honor at the Chicago Ridge Fieldhouse,
or the big indie shows in New York,
the big indie shows in New York,
that would draw 1,200 people.
They don't remember that shit on national television,
because most of them didn't fucking know what happened.
It never heard any of those people.
And when you do angles based on the fond remembrance
that Tony Kahn and all of the other people
who were doing the things I just mentioned,
trading for these tapes and DVDs and fucking on the Ring of Honor
mailing list in 2006 and whatever the fuck,
it's great to book like this.
but not for national TV.
And there's...
What is it the kids say there's levels to this?
When I was on the creative team in the WWF,
I had philosophies I would pitch,
I had concepts I would pitch,
or help with stipulations, or a finish, or whatever,
but I'm not suggesting that if I'd had soul control,
I would have booked it like Smoky Mountain Wrestling
because that wouldn't have worked for all the reasons
and we've talked about that at the same year,
ECW wouldn't have worked in Tennessee
and they would have hooted at Smoky Mount Wrestling in Philadelphia.
In Ohio Valley Wrestling had a very different booking philosophy
than all of them
because it was an even smaller territory
but meant to be a local proving ground facility.
You book at levels to what your goddamn venue or your audience is.
Are you doing a spot show at goddamn rec center in Elizabethtown, Kentucky?
Or are you doing a main event fugging extravaganza at the Louisville Gardens and
seats 6,000 people 45 miles up the road?
You don't put Steve Austin in goddamn Elizabeth town.
it's booking to your venue and to your potential audience on television
and talent that can get over on a regional basis
because of who they are, what their gimmick is, whatever
may not fly on national TV
just the same way as a goddamn guy who might be on top in
Dallas, Texas might not translate to New York or Charlotte
but when you're broadcasting a national television show,
you attempt to acknowledge the histories of the veteran wrestlers you have
and pump up their background without going into excruciating goddamn minor detail about the Elks Lodge.
But you tell them your stories and sell your talent the way you want it sold,
not the way other people have done it.
And you explain to your audience who everybody is
and why they're mad at each other
and what they'd like to get out of this thing.
And then you go from there.
And just because you liked it,
when you were a teenager,
doesn't mean you need to put it on national TV 20 years later
with the same people.
That's the people say, I'm stuck in the past.
I wanted to do,
in OVW 20 years ago, I wanted to do wrestling philosophically like it was done in the 80s
with guys that were born in the 80s.
And maybe 25 years old.
Now they're doing wrestling from the 90s and 2000s with the same people that were doing it.
Brian, are you still there?
Are you okay?
Yes, I am.
Have I been going on too long?
Well, it's never too long.
but you're making a point.
Did I get to it yet?
That I haven't been able to determine.
I'm just, that's,
that's the point I was trying to make
is that Tony is narrowcasting
because he thinks that everybody knows.
All the fans know,
and they're in their bubble,
where they're the guys that didn't want to dress
like they were in a street fight,
or didn't want to tape their fist,
or didn't want to explain the match
or their gimmick
because they're so over that everybody knows.
Well, I got news for a lot of you.
Everybody don't know.
A lot of people didn't know that fucking
Chris Jericho was still in a wrestling business.
Remember when he was on AEW television?
So if you're trying to get any more than you've already got,
then you need to fucking not narrow cast
to the people that already fucking know.
and if you always do what you always did,
then you always get what you always got.
All right, that was Smackdown.
Was it?
Oh, no?
No, no, we didn't even get there yet.
Well, I guess now it might be time, Brian,
that we head over to see what the folks down in Jacksonville or do.
Boy, do they still have a headquarters left?
A.E.W. and Tony and our friends over there,
is Jacksonville still around?
What is the status of everything down there in Florida?
Oh, you're talking about it because of the hurricane?
Yeah, no, I figured Jacksonville just packed up and fucking moved.
I thought you meant because of a disaster that is this season for the Jaguars.
No, I'm not even talking.
We'll talk more about that, or we may have talked about that.
We don't even know.
I'm saying, is everyone safe in Jacksonville?
Was Jacksonville one of the harmed cities?
It seems like it's over in that, up in that,
up in that area, Tallahassee, Jacksonville,
depending on which way it went through.
Did it do a 7-10 split?
I'm not sure, but of course we send our best to the listeners,
especially in North Carolina.
I was just seeing that on the news as we are recording,
but the best to everyone and hopefully everyone in Jacksonville is safe.
I sat through...
From the booking and the weather.
Yeah, from the booking and the weather.
I sat through Hurricane Hugo when I lived in Charlotte, North Carolina.
Did I ever tell you that?
I'm not sure.
hurricane
the hurricane
the hurricane
sounds frightening
it was coming through
the hurricane
Hugo
Hugo for short
came to
I had three days off
it was 1988
it was 1988
September
my birthday
right
and it just so happened
and I didn't even ask for it
but I had three days off
and that was a time
where we were never getting days off
right
and so I had all the I was going to sit and watch my TV wrestling tapes because we still had territories
and I was going to have my cake and I was going to enjoy my own bed and my air conditioning
and my puppies and my family and a whole nine yards and the goddamn as soon the first of the
three days off Hurricane Hugo came through knocked the power out my wife
at the time and the dogs are in the bathtub with a blanket over them,
taking shelter and I am sitting cross-legged in my fucking bed in the bedroom,
in the dark with a candle lit, eating my fucking cake with a fork,
looking out the window and shit bending sideways and fucking witches on bicycles blowing by.
Good God damn it!
It's my fucking time off.
God damn it.
And I'm eating that fucking cat.
Guess when the power cake.
back on.
When?
One hour after I had left three days later for the airport to go back on the road.
Kind of sounds like that now.
What's going on in the background now?
What I don't hear anything, Brian?
What are you talking about?
It's quiet as a church over here.
I hope you can get Toto inside and, you know, get some cover.
It's, there is not, I'm not being buzzed by Air Force bombardiers.
The, the friendly lawn gentleman.
The grass cutting people are here.
doing their thing.
It just rained four inches here
and for Christ's sake. So we got
a lot of grass. It's getting tall out.
It's a jungle out there.
The grass cutting people?
The grass cutting gentlemen.
Fine upstanding grass
reapers.
Anyway, speaking of reaper. A noisy ganga guys
if I say so much.
Well, they're raucous.
Everybody always say, we can't hear
these noises, Brian.
The noise that
Randy Orden's got voices.
you got noises.
And then,
and AEW has neither
Randy Orton nor
noises over there.
It's silent as a church
over there as well.
Are we talking about this television program?
AEW Dynamite,
this was the annual Grand Slam
extravaganza from Arthur Ashe Stadium
in Queens, New York.
They've been going there.
This is the third one, I believe.
Yeah, well, they've gone from Grand Slam
to Stunted Bunt.
What do they,
what do they call it when a Bunt doesn't work?
A busted bunt?
You're the baseball guy.
They don't really, I don't think there's really a term for it.
The term for you just cut the guy from the fucking team.
Well, no, you don't do that.
If the guy botches a bunt, you don't.
Well, you know, a botched bunt.
There's the term.
He doesn't get the bunt down.
Usually that's what you hear.
If he doesn't get the bun down.
If he can't even hit the ball just a little dribble halfway to the fucking pitcher,
why do they want that guy on a team?
We're not asking for a home run here.
just knock it 25 feet.
Well, again, it's not as easy as you say,
but again, you want to keep the ball down.
You don't want it to go up, you want it to go down.
If it goes up, they may catch it.
Well, not if it's only going 15, 20 feet.
I'd just whack it straight up
and let it fall straight in front of the pitcher
and let him just be dumbfounded.
So you wouldn't be bunting,
you'd actually be swinging you, like a little child.
Well, no, I might bunt it.
I might...
It's not a bunt?
Do you know what a bunt is?
The bunt is where it doesn't go very far.
That's what the bunt is.
How do you hold the bat when you bun?
You got to work with it.
You're hitting it a working shot.
What do you mean?
Instead of trying to...
I don't know what you mean.
What do you mean you're working?
What are you talking about instead of taking a big swing and trying to hit as hard as you
can and trying to knock it out of the park there, you just you work the swing.
So you don't really put any power behind it and it just goes poof.
It just poof.
Well, I mean, you kind of do like a half swing, but you, you know, sometimes you, you want to kind of push the ball one way or the other.
Which two motherfuckers in this conversation right now has actually struck another human being in the stomach with a baseball bat?
Which one of us has struck a ball with a baseball bat?
No, I asked first.
I'm talking about baseball, not...
I'm talking about working baseball shots.
I've hit people and never, I've never injured anyone with my working baseball shots.
So I'd be a great bunter.
So you call that a bunt?
what you were doing?
Well, I was bunching them.
I wasn't home running them.
That's not what you...
I would hurt somebody.
All right.
I will wait till we have some video examples to show you for next time.
But we are not to dynamite.
It's a Ring of Honor show in Chicago and what was it?
2000, that's when I hurt my knee, as a matter of fact.
2006-ish.
The night before, I'd whacked old Necro butcher in a stomach with a baseball bat.
He was fine.
Of course he had
he had you know
pretty high tolerance for things
but nevertheless he was unscathed
We're not talking baseball
We're talking tennis
We're talking tennis
We're talking tennis
Arthur Ash Stadium Grand Slam
That's right
Was Arthur Ash the only sports personality
That wasn't on the commentary team
Did we establish that Arthur Ash is still living
Arthur Ash has passed away
Okay that's why he wasn't on commentary
But everybody else was
it was like the fucking chorus line
in a Bob Fosse musical.
You had sock face.
You had Chivani.
You had Taz.
You had Jim Ross.
Justin Smiley Roberts was doing the ring announcing.
Do you think they had a run on tuxedos at men's warehouse
trying to outfit the biggest announced team in history?
Boy, those gardeners, I'm glad they don't have to outfit them.
That sounds like a crew of 100 people back there.
Well, no.
that, actually, that's my helicopter.
I'm late for my next appointment.
The commentating, let's just bring it up here,
a very popular topic because it's true.
It's awful. It's so bad.
Excalibur is world-class awful.
Chivani is world-class awful.
And then Taz just has no function
because he's with these idiots.
It's so bad. It's so bad.
And then let's let Jim Ross see
if he can get a word in edgewise before somebody else
takes a completely different direction.
Jim Ross could say whatever he wants.
and sometimes it's really good stuff for the match.
Whatever he says, it doesn't matter.
Scalibor's going to take it and go to different direction
and then shoot the Taz every time.
Isn't that right, Taz?
And the Taz has nothing to say because it's not.
He jumps back in with, and that's what's happening.
It's like, well, yeah, yeah, that's right.
Or absolutely.
Like, they're agreeing with each other instead of just going with it.
But also, he'll go down some line
and you think there's more to come
and suddenly he'll say, right, Taz, Taz.
Yeah, okay, yeah.
There you.
Great call.
But also, I mean, you.
You can't, if you had Jim Ross, Gordon, Sully, Lance Russell, and Bob Caudill, altogether, you couldn't have a coherent.
God, it's too many people.
Anyway, so Nigel McGinnis versus Brian Danielson opened up the Grand Slam.
And by the way, they seem like they had a fair amount of people for their standards these days, but that's a, again, a big,
building because how many they had, it wasn't half the
capacity. So what did
how many did they have there at the slam?
According to Russell Ticks, I don't know if this is the final number,
but as of the next day, estimated tickets distributed 8,319.
I mean, that's better than we thought they were going to do, but were they
still selling tickets the next day? Well, this is the fourth. I was wrong. It's not the
third. This is the fourth Grand Slam. The first one,
2021, September 22nd, 19, 79.
The second one, 2022, 13,321, and then 2023, 11,263, and this one, 8,319.
I'm going to put my money in next year.
It's going to be 6,700.
Yeah, though, let's see.
They went down 6,000, and they went down 2,000.
and then one is 3,000.
I'll put in 5,900.
All right, let's stick with this next year.
Advanced prediction.
Next year, they're doing Grand Slam in Australia,
so we're talking next year, Arthur Ash, if they run it,
and I guess that is questionable, we'll see.
If they run it, I'm saying 6,700, you're saying 5,900.
Yeah, but it may be a moot point, because now that he's dead,
has he left the place to somebody?
Not to AEW, that was for sure.
I just wonder, are they going to close it up now that he's,
passed on or they got somebody else in line to run it.
You know, he was real hands-on.
He was taking tickets and everything.
I don't know where you're going.
I'm trying not to talk about this television show.
Danielson versus Nigel McGinnis.
Yes.
And I think Nigel McGinnis is a wonderful person.
And but this, the muddling of this story, let's talk about the muddled story first.
see if I get this right, Brian, or help me explain this muddled story.
Originally, it was going to be Danielson and Darby, right, for the title?
Is that, that's what they had...
Darby, it had been established won the right to a title match.
Was it necessarily Akron Slam?
That's the only thing I'm not sure of.
Okay, but then the point is, Moxley, whether he's a heel or a baby face,
or in his mind, the son of a sea cook
or whatever the fuck is going on with him,
came out and said,
on TV and said,
after I put the plastic bag over Danielson's head,
he ain't going to be able to wrestle at Grand Slam.
You ain't going to be able to get your title match.
How about you put the title match up against me?
Which actually made no sense.
Well, you're right.
Still doesn't.
So according to Moxley,
it would have been Darby's match in that promo.
So yeah, you're right.
and then in that same television show
that they had established that since
Danielson wasn't able to wrestle Darby
already had his world title match if he wanted it
that Nigel was challenging Danielson
but not for the title just for a match
but then they started advertising it
if Danielson shows up
if he's clear
well if he shows up why wouldn't he
you see where I'm going with all of this shit right so now playing off of that premise that they have set they came on the air with Nigel going to the ring and all of the announcers all 27 of them nobody's heard from Danielson since all out no guarantee he'll be here nobody's seen him all day I'm like how the fuck could he be if
If you're about to play this fucking guy's music on a national television program
that's being broadcast live,
wouldn't he have to be standing there in front of you?
Help me.
There's no help.
It's been laid out badly, but the fans there will forgive it because they got the match
they wanted, which was Danielson versus Nigel.
And I guess the match they want, which is Moxley versus Danielson.
Although after that Moxley match, I don't know how anyone could ever want to watch more of
him ever.
But we'll get there.
But back to this.
So then they play Danielson's music and nobody comes out.
And then Nigel gets the microphone and says Danielson is a coward and asks for a 10 count
from the referee to be declared the winner of the match and for Danielson to be stripped
of the title even though it's not a title match, which the announcer's actually even said.
And then the referee gets to 6 on his 10 count.
and then the final countdown starts playing
so there's another 200 grand
god damn it
used to when if carrie silken
went to the casino when they were in
Dayton or whatever
you know there was a casino nearby
and he lost a couple of hundred bucks
the ring of honor guys would go ah shit
there goes Chicago
but this is it was
to fuck
and they start playing
playing this music and Jim Ross jumps in and says, what a great ovation for the champ.
He hadn't come out yet.
We still don't know if he's there.
They just switched music.
They were playing different kind of music.
And I mean, this thing is snake bit, brother.
And then when JR says that, Tony says, is he here?
And then guess what he walks out?
And I'm like, what the fuck is this mess?
So people...
And this is for a match that, like, does it matter?
Like, it's in this big entrance, too.
That's where I was going with the...
It matters to...
You know, it matters to, it matters to Tony Kahn
because he watched the Ring of Honor tapes.
And it matters to Brian,
and it matters to Nigel.
And it matters to their friends.
And it matters to the people
that are still around, that are still watching wrestling,
that watched
the Ring of Honor
matches in 2009 and all of those people put together that I just mentioned is a very small
group and the rest of the people know again even if they did a package for one week on
TV that Nigel used to be a wrestler and it was that was admirable that they did that
they're saying here's a guy that hadn't had a match in 13 years and he's an announcer
he's in there with the world champion of our company
and boy it's going to be nip and tuck
help me with that
it's so that they
that Tony could give
Brian and Nigel
and that very small
group of really allegedly smart fans
a feel good moment
on one of his big national television programs
in New York City
in 20,000 seat building is not half full.
And it didn't look.
I mean, again, they went a while.
It was a competitive match.
Danielson won as he should have,
as anyone would have predicted he would have.
But at times it was, you know, and again,
Nigel hasn't wrestled in a long time,
and he probably shouldn't be working a stiff, stiff style
considering the layoff alone.
Well, they weren't working a stiff, stiff style.
Exactly.
But they went the other way at times.
And again, their last match in Ring of Honor in New York was my first match,
back with Ring of Honor after T&A.
That was 2009.
And they were great matches.
I'm not saying they weren't.
And Nigel's in great shape for he's had health issues and been out of the ring.
He looks great for whatever his age may be.
but this was a really inside match
and
you know it also
they wanted to kind of do a little bit of all the kind of stuff they used to do
but they went from World of Sport style wrestling
to Nigel was trying to crush
Danielson's arm with the steel stairs so they went from world of sport
to World of Attempted Murder in the same match
and
if what they could have done with this
is Tony could have said, tell you what, guys,
the next time we do a Ring of Honor
pay-per-view,
then you should main event that,
and Nigel, you called Danielson out,
and Brian, you
except, however, but that's the audience
they were going for,
and this just makes no sense
to put on their
current flagship program.
and nobody was going to get hurt
because they didn't want to hurt
each other
but part of the
morbid attraction of their
original matches was that
somebody was always getting hurt
because they were fucking beating a shit out of each other
and themselves
those are really physical matches
and this wasn't that
and it shouldn't have been that and it couldn't be that
and it was all right but
it
I mean, they popped for Nigel's clotheslines.
And as a matter of fact, at one point, Nigel hit a clothesline and got a two count and then hit another clothesline and got another two count.
And a people were really up.
And then they sat back down because the people were ready for the comeback and the finish,
but the boys weren't ready to give it to them yet.
and they did some more stuff
and then finally
Brian kind of got the
Lebel lock and not very tight
but then they were kind of jockeying out of it
and he got back into it not very tight
and then the network
even fucked the finish up
because the idea was
as Nigel is about to tap out
in the LaBelle lock
he's going to scream
thank you
which is a guy
Show respect to his old nemesis, right?
The fucking guy with the audio button
at TBS thought he said
Fuck you and bleep the thank you.
So the goddamn announcers had to say,
I think he said thank you.
Because they audio,
they audio muted where it's like
distorted.
When he said, thank you.
Oh God.
It turns out this whole time Moxley's been telling us to go thank ourselves.
There you have it.
So I guess now they're getting so gun-shy about whatever these wild crazy maniacs will say on this program
that they're just bleeping any time somebody yells something.
But I hate to, you know, hate to criticize these guys, but I got to criticize these guys.
It just wasn't the venue and it was too long.
and it didn't help anybody but make them feel good in the end.
Is that the end for Nigel?
Is he going to be like a wrestler?
Is this the end for Little Rico?
I mean, he did the Battle Royal in Wembley and now this.
Is that the end?
Is he actually in the middle of a comeback or was it all just so he could have the match with
Danielson?
No, from what it looks like to me now, I could be wrong.
I have no inside knowledge.
But it looks like to me, everybody likes Nigel, and they should.
Tony likes Nigel.
You know what Tony does for his friends?
Nigel should get to wrestle in Wembley,
and Nigel should get to have one more match with Brian.
I don't know whether this is a long-continued comeback tour or not.
But in that case, he should have just gone ahead and beat Danielson, because what the fuck?
And then Christian, oh, and they've got to end it with comedy.
Christian Cage's music plays, and he comes out with.
with the contract that he can sign
and get a world title match
anytime and they're going, oh my God!
He cashes in against Daniels said he's just gone
15 minutes or 20 minutes or whatever
with this hard match.
And Pip Sabian sneaks up behind Christian
and steals his pen and runs off.
So then Christian runs to chase him
and goes through the curtain
and comes face to face with Pac and Claudio
and he gets scared
and he runs the other way.
And then we were 27 minutes into the program
by the time that all of that was over with.
Do you think we'll have a match for the pen?
Pin on a pole.
Is the pen necessary?
Do you need that pen to sign that contract?
Well, it's the only pen he had.
It's the first one stolen pen theft was a thing of wrestling.
No, it's the only pin he had
and he hasn't had any lead in his pencil
since the attitude era.
So...
But anyway, speaking of the pencil being poorly packed,
the next match on this program was for the FTW title.
How about FTT?
Fuck this title.
Wouldn't that be more apropos?
Well, that's kind of what the ending was here, isn't it?
In a sense, not to say, fuck.
Well, I think maybe Tass just demanded his property back.
He don't trust these people anymore.
But when we get there?
Hook versus Roderick Strong.
and of course
and he's got Taven and Bennett
and Binnett never wrestle on this show
and they're better than half the people
that are wrestling on his show
and they rang the bell
because this is the FTW title
anything goes
no disqualification
lazy booking
and they were on the floor with
Kendo sticks and interference from the stooges
within the first 60 seconds of the thing
So, seriously, what is the point?
I will get to the meat of the matter.
After taking a variety of bumps on chairs set up in the middle of the ring,
for no good reason, Hook choked him out.
Imagine that.
And then Roddy and Taven and Bennett are standing here,
and Roddy offers his hand,
and shakes Hook's hand and hugs him.
and rolls out, and then Taven and Bennett shake Hook's hand, and they leave.
It was like they were moving to another town.
What was that?
Well, that's it.
It was like a goodbye.
Like, well, you know, it's been great working with you, kid, but it's time for us to mosey on down the road.
And they were just hitting each other with fucking weapons and chairs and kendo sticks and
whatever the fuck and try to drop each other on their necks.
and it oh okay shake hands and see you later
I don't what
shake hands with me and my friends
all is forgiven though
apparently and then
or maybe is it hook that's saying
sionara here
because then Tony Chivani
Ace reporter gets to the fucking bottom
of the thing with
he says
and this is a quote from Tony
In 1998, three miles away at the Elks Lodge,
the FTW title was born by your father, Taz.
Besides the horrible grammar,
what kind of smart mark bullshit is that for national television?
Yeah, we used to wrestle at the Elks Lodge, is what the average?
What?
The Elks Lodge.
They're in a 20,000 seats.
building. It's not half full, but they're talking about the Elks Lodge 25 years ago.
So anyway, Hook says thank you, Tony. But all good things must come to an end, so on behalf of
my family, I thank every wrestler who's ever competed for this title and all the fans who
have supported it. And in this very moment, the FTW title is officially retired. And he hands it
back to Taz and he hugs Taz and hook walks off.
And Taz had a gleam in his eye there.
It was a somber situation.
It would have brought a tear to a glass eye.
So now they've retired the FTW title.
And like I say,
maybe was Taz just calling his property back in?
Like, what the fuck?
I do,
what happened here?
I saw this as a good thing.
they reduced the championship from AEW.
That's something they've had to do.
They probably should do it a few more times.
There's too many titles.
And if this is their way of acknowledging that and getting rid of one of them
with a very happy moment where Hook wins the title,
well, here he was the champion, kept the title.
Yes.
And then shook everyone's hand and then gave it to his dad.
It was a very nice neutral sports-based moment.
I liked it.
Yeah.
Goodbye FTW.
Well, the only way it would make any difference is they followed with another seven or eight belts.
But just besides that, the heels being heels until they're happy heels and then I don't know what the fuck is going on.
You know, Brian, maybe what the thing is is that Taz said, you know, I'm not getting any younger.
And I don't know whether this company is going to last too much longer or not.
I need my belt back, my FTW title belt, so I can maybe auction it off for something, raise some cash for my retirement.
Really? You don't think he's going to leave it to hook?
I didn't, well, he's already left at the hook, and Hook barely hung on to it.
I think now it's time for him to cash in. You know, he ought to go to our friends at Shopify.
Because I bet you they could get him a ton of money. He could just start selling belts and boots and tights and
all kinds of headgear, all kinds of things.
Well, maybe we could wait a few years in Hook and go to Shopify and sell the belt that he now has
when Taz, you know, moves to Florida.
I don't think you ought to wait to go to Shopify.
I think you ought to do it right now because nobody does selling better than Shopify.
I thought you've seen the mushrooming amount of rich people in the world.
People are getting richer all over the world.
It's because they're hooked up with Shopify.
because that's the home
of the number one checkout
on the planet.
I will have you know, Brian,
that shop pay
boosts conversions up to 50%.
Now, it used to be hard to get paid.
What you used to have to do
is you used to have to put your goods and your merchandise
and the things you were trying to sell,
you put them in a big sack,
and you put them on your back and you troged.
You trodged through the mud and the snow
and you went from outpost to outpost.
And sometimes they might give you a dollar bill,
but before that they'd give you a coin of the realm.
And sometimes they wouldn't even do that.
They would give you peltz and skins,
raccoon furs and otter claws and the like,
that served as monetary compensation.
And then you'd have to trudge and sludge that back
to put it in the bank there at the local,
general store with good old Cincinnati.
But no more, Brian, you don't have to do that anymore.
Because Shopify, if you're selling your goods and merchandise through our friends at
Shopify, if somebody wants to pay with a raccoon pelt, that's what conversions means.
They will take that pelt and they'll give you the equivalent amount in United States coinage.
Now, what more service can you want perform than that?
I can tell you what more service.
The truth, none of that is true, ladies and gentlemen.
You cannot trade any sort of pelt off any sort of dead animal.
That is not the kind of converting.
We're talking about converting visitors of your website into paying customers,
happy, happy customers receiving happy, happy, happy packages from your friends, from you, actually,
and your friends of Shopify will be there to help you.
Well, I'm not saying dead animals.
I'm just saying the skin off of dead animals.
You're not saying live animals.
Well, no, live animals.
Now, they'll convert those too.
Now, let's say you want to pay with chickens.
You can't pay with, you can mail them apparently,
but you can't pay with chickens.
You know what?
In Evansville, Indiana, this old guy used to pay Christine Jarrett
for his general admission ticket sometimes
with a bushel of beans from his garden.
And they'll convert the beans, too.
This is why I'm happy Vince McMahon got wrestling out of the smoke-filled
Barnes. But he was there every week for years and years because of those beans. And I'll tell you what,
folks, you're going to be there for years and years laying back and relaxing with farting through
silk with all the money in your bank account because of Shopify. No more carts going abandoned.
Way more sales going just like that, see? So if you're into growing your business,
your e-commerce platform better be ready to sell wherever your cousin.
customers are existing there.
On the web, in your store, in their feed?
If they're in their feed, like, if they're in their feed,
does that mean they're having lunch?
No, in their social media feed, not their bag of food.
Oh, oh, I feel, well, people on the go.
I've seen that's fashionable in the bigger cities these days.
They're just tying a bag around their neck where they can lean over and graze.
But anyway, no matter what kind of business or operation you're trying to run,
shop a file help you take more money in because they will not
they will not take no for an answer if these people don't want to pay you
or buy gum they're going to they're going to get a knock on a door
so right now folks as the lawnmowers
sounds like someone with a chainsaw is coming for you right now Jim
they're working on the wall right now
see they use shopify also I can't not pay them
I've tried to run them off they're unfiring that's
another thing. If you're using Shopify, people can't fire you. You have your job for life.
That's not true. They're afraid of Shopify. They're getting closer, Jim, but that's not true.
It's inside the wall. So upgrade your business right now and sign up for your $1 a month trial period right now.
And for heaven's sake, if you can't afford a dollar, what are you doing right? You ought to be digging a ditch somewhere if you don't have a dollar hanging right.
Anyway, Shopify.com slash JCE, all lowercase, that's Shopify.com slash JCE, to get the $1 a month trial period and upgrade your selling today.
Ooh, that's sweet selling.
All right, well, I don't know about how much sweet selling there was on this show, especially in the next match, but let's go back to AW Dynamite.
Well, that's the problem.
The next match, people were calling this a great tag team match between the Hardley Boys,
Maddie and Nicky and Osprey and Felcher for the tag team title.
And I'm trying to be, it was a great, long, big long match.
Multiple picture and pictures.
Multiple, multiple, multiple.
And you couldn't follow the shit when it was the only thing on the screen,
much less with a douche commercial on the left-hand side.
Did I write down how long this thing lasted?
It was 13, easily 20 minutes.
But here's the problem.
It wasn't a great tag team match.
It wasn't even a good tag team match.
It was a wonderful athletic exhibition.
It was, you know,
Was it more video game-ish or more kung fu movie-ish?
For the things that the kids play when they're bored these days,
it was a lot of that.
But this wasn't a wrestling match, and it's not its AEW.
Brian, what tag team match of the last five years that we have watched
did I say was the greatest tag team match I've seen in 20 years or maybe ever?
what company presented that match
I think it was AEW
I think it was FTR versus Juice Robinson
and Jay White
Yes it was
And they went an hour
58 minutes actually
And it was one of the greatest
tag team matches
If not as I said the best I've ever seen
So it's not like I won't give AEW any credit
It's just that this
Whatever this was
It wasn't a tag team wrestling match
There were no tags
Within 30 seconds
They just all jumped in
started doing four-way spots.
And that desiccated corpse of a referee
just stands there slack-jawed because
why does he referee all the Buccarus' matches?
Because he's their guy.
And he doesn't do anything.
And he doesn't care that he looks like a feckless asshole.
And because...
Every match is a Texas Tornado gymnastics match.
And this was classic Bucks of several years ago
when it was nonstop, big moves, kick out of everything,
the fans going to the indie shows went crazy,
it got exposed on the national stage, people stopped caring,
but again, it was a Texas tornado match.
And, you know, the guys having to stand in position forever
to, you know, catch the dive or the flip or the whatever,
they have the baby face, straining to make a tag,
when both the heels are just in the ring beating his partner up
and the referees then are doing nothing about it
and they stay in for all the spots
and then they'll tag in and out until he'd come in for more spots.
If you pay attention to Rick Knox during this match,
it becomes so interesting watching him do nothing.
At times he just stands in the corner kind of split-legged
with his hands at his side and he does nothing.
He's just watching what's happening.
And at one point he got a round of booze
because he was so zoned out by just every repetitive thing he was seeing in front of him
looked like they were on visual speed search that then Osprey gets a cover
and the referee's standing and not doing anything.
Oh shit and he runs and got one, two and the people booed the shit out of him.
Like, what the fuck?
You haven't done anything in 15 minutes and you're standing there staring at this?
and then one of the baby faces
has to lay on the floor
and sit there and watch the other two heels
kick the shit out of his partner
until it's time for him to come in and make a save
and then they go through the series of
moves where you can't tell who is beating who up
one guy will pick a guy up for a fucking power bomb
and the guy will spin in the air
and grab him by the hair and facebuster him
and that guy will jump up and turn around
and the other guy will stick his foot down his fucking throat
with a flying savot kick
and then everybody will suddenly just decide to sell all at once
when nobody sold anything
and then at one point they gave Feltcher
a spike tombstone pile driver
off the top rope onto the apron
then he's on the floor he was dead for nine seconds then rolls back in
and by the time they come back from the commercial break
he's giving stereo styles clashes to one of the buckaroos
with his partner Willie Boy
and then they did more four-way video is this what the video games look like these days
I don't think you play any video games I don't see any video games that are like this
even their video game wasn't like this and their video game bombed
Well, because, I mean, human beings don't do these moves and they make no sense and they require the obvious cooperation.
And I'm thinking, what are they acting like?
Because this is not wrestling shit.
What are they, is it the live action kung fu movie then?
Or are they trampoline?
That's what it is.
You know, whether they realize it or not, it's a live action, the kid with the golden arm.
It's a Shaw Brothers film.
So that's what this is.
Well, so and then.
here now here the fates were even trying to be kind to me they were 16 minutes into this fucking thing
and i recorded the program on two different DVRs in the house right
and on both of them 16 minutes in i got a sudden black screen and then the dvr would jump ahead
One of them jumped head four minutes.
One of them only jumped ahead two minutes.
But it was like automatically the cable gods were trying to say he can't take anymore, get to the end of this fucking thing.
So whatever happened in that two minutes, they come back, they're doll diving to the floor.
And Don Phallis gets up and gives Kyle a screwdriver.
he was given everybody a screwdriver and then some of them would use it and some of them wouldn't
and some of them would take it away from the other ones and they'd try to stab each other in the
face and hit the turnbuckle or what they were they were using a screwdriver well now the
screwdriver returns don gives Kyle the screwdriver and then Don runs around and draws the referee
and oh Kyle rolls in the ring and he draws it back and he's going to stab
one of the fucking goofs.
And then suddenly, Osprey is there and grabs his arm and jerks the screwdriver away.
And he said, no, no, no. You can't brov.
You can't bribe. You can't stop him brav with the screwdriver.
You think my impressions are going to get over like yours do?
I like to call to your gym, not the screwdriver.
Brov?
Yeah, yours is better, I guess.
way. So, Osprey, the NARC, grabs the screwdriver and walks, instead of just throwing it out of the ring,
he walks over and hands it to the referee. Like, here, I want you to know that we're not using this
that you don't even know is happening because you're complete idiot, you've turned you back on
everything. Really, if all the referees to hand this important torture. Yeah, yeah, instead of
just flinging it out of the ring, here, I'm going to entrust you with this. So then old fucking
corpse referee immediately walks to the other side of the ring
and leans out and starts trying to hand it physically to somebody
and obviously turning his back so as not to see anything.
So Maddie has gotten one of the title belts
and as Osprey turns
and why does everybody, when they turn around to go in the other direction,
they turn at a dead run? They suddenly turn and take off like,
I'm going to go now.
And he runs right into the belt.
Boom, Maddie nails him with the belt
and then Mattie
rolls the goddamn
I think he dropped the one belt
and then Felcher rolls
Mattie up somehow
no wait, Mattie hit Osprey
with the belt. That's what it was
and then
he's got the belt
but when Felcher rolls Matt up
Matt throws the belt out to Nick
and Nick hits Feltcher with the belt or something
but somehow they ended up hitting
Felcher with the belt and the head too
and they cover him and they got a two count
they can't even fuck the fucking baby faces
when the baby faces that they're fucking are mostly heels
and then they picked him up and did that shitty double knee lift
and that did the trick one two three
so it was a goddamn ridiculous finish
and in a match filled with ridiculous finishes
in a match filled with ridiculous non-finishes
and it
and again
who were we so we're cheering for the fucking team
managed by the evil bald guy that gives people
screwdrivers to stab people with
what
The part where Matt Jackson kicked out of the big moves
was the most egregiously unbelievable thing of the match.
And again, wrestling is an unbelievable sport.
But there are certain things that push the imagination beyond what's normal.
Matt Jackson.
Matt Jackson reverting back into Road Warrior Buck again,
where he's the strongest force in the universe.
Ridiculous.
They did multiple finishes for minutes on end, kicking out of everything.
while the referee did nothing.
This match, there are a lot of people who thought it was amazing to a lot of us who thought this five years ago, seven years ago, whatever it was.
It's the same thing we've seen before.
It's just a Texas tornado match where the Bucks get to do the stuff they want to do with their friends.
And it doesn't fit into the world of professional wrestling.
Doesn't fit into the rules of wrestling.
And, yeah, I wasn't a big fan of this match.
And as I've mentioned before, the reason why that they were able to attain a position they have attained is because they found marks that were willing to let them do shit that nobody else could do, wanted to do, or should have done.
And then you get over until everybody realizes that's the only thing you can fucking do.
Yeah, well, that's the problem, too.
This is a stadium show in New York, and it was the smallest stadium show crowd that they've done in New York.
And this was just a match on the show.
most dynamites draw
what equal to if not less than at this point
where the bucks are drawing on the indies
when we were told they were the big drawing card
and going all these random indies
and drawing big houses against
you know the hardies or whoever they were working with
the crowds are smaller now than they were then
and they're in Arthur Ashe Tennis Stadium
what about if they decided to play tennis
where they let one
group of the doubles people
they can both cross back and forth
and hit it on either side they want
and they can catch it and throw it back with their bare hands
if they can do that.
I bet it might pop the people,
but should they just be allowed to do that
because they can't really play and follow the rules?
And the other sad thing is the team that comes out of this looking impressive
is Osprey and Fletcher, who I'd never seen team before.
And they had size and they looked good together.
They're size there.
Because someone recently said to me by Daniel Garcia, they go,
you think he's a big guy, he's a lot smaller than you realize,
but because everyone on AEW TV is so small, he looks big.
Who knows how big they are?
I think Fletcher legit is like 6'5 or something, but they look good in there to get.
Well, that's the thing.
Again, if it's too late now, because Osprey's, you know,
he's closer to the end than the beginning with the way that he works
and the shit that he does.
But if these two guys were producing,
what a fucking baby face team with all the fancy things they could do if they did three of them
per match and had strong heels to call a match you could make money with these two guys as a top
baby face tag team athletically visually cosmetically they got fancy outfits they have flashy
they look but it's just more of this nonsensical fucking parody rest of it's a
that, you know, that they all have to do when they get in there
and they take the feedback of the smallest group of fans possible
to determine what they should do with their goddamn careers.
Anyway, would you like to move on?
Let's move on from whatever that was.
Yes, because poor Prince Nana.
So I don't know what the benefit of this is.
but they have Tony Chivani bring Prince Nana out on stage
and beat around the bush in some again
tortured way of getting to the point
how swerve
and Nana starts actually getting to do a promo
can you remember the last time Nana just did a promo
for the guy he manages?
Never
So he's actually starting to do a promo
and of course he has to start it with
you know what he put and swerve over
said that there's nothing that can stop him mentally
but physically he's not cleared
and as soon as he gets that out
here comes MVP
making his debut and stealing the show
and the way that they had him do it
was by coming out
and cutting a promo on
Nana putting swerve over like, you know, the greatest thing in the world,
and saying all of his troubles are Nana's fault.
And it was a hell of a promo, and much of it was true in terms of that Nana in the
booking and the creative has never gotten to say anything or do anything meaningful.
He never interfered when swerve was a heel for the most part,
when he's been a baby face and he's been attacked.
Nana wasn't even worked in to fight back.
So now MVP comes out and tells him off
and then Nana has to stand there with a blank look on his face
when MVP says, here's my card, give it to swerve.
And he walks off and Nana's again.
You don't let a guy go out there
and just get buried
He doesn't say nothing at all, do you?
Especially when he manages one of your top fucking guys, help me.
And if MVP's a heel, which he is, you know, that's the best way to use him.
He came out there and told the truth.
He just came out there and you agree with him.
As he's saying, he's like, yeah, you know what?
If Swerve really did have a good manager, like MVP, maybe things will be different.
Not a dance, even though Swerve wasn't even out there.
He danced and he had like a bag of coffee.
and then he started his promo
But also then if MVP is the heel
Which it sounded like he was
But I thought Swerve just switched back heel
But then Nonna would be a heel
But they like Swerve and they like Nana
No swerve became a baby face again
When they burned his house down
Oh I forgot about that was the last thing
Yeah he was a heel for three weeks before that
Okay then the heel just came out
And told the baby face off
And the baby face said absolutely nothing
it did nothing about it.
Well, obviously, this is the setup you would think swerve turning down MVP
and that MVP has something, has a problem with swerve,
and that sets up maybe coming in with MVP, but...
But the problem with that is, why would he turn MVP down at this point?
If you saw Nana, if you were swerve, would you say,
hey, why do you tell that motherfucker off?
Why don't you tell him to fuck this and fuck you and fuck you and fuck the other,
something?
you don't have Nana just stand there
and like a mute
even if that was the idea that they had
someone
should have been producing that
should have been well by where's Nana's balls
can we go run find them and give them back to him
he should have taken the card and torn it up in his face
and said if you want to talk
to swerve Strickland I can't do his accent
then you go through Prince Nana
and MVP is
oh we'll see about that
and then
now you've got a goddamn conflict
what do you have there as a doormat
right
what do you think of the idea of MVP
coming in potentially with Lashley or Shelton Benjamin
some people have had a problem with it
because of specifically the age
of the wrestlers
mentioned some people have a problem with it
because they're WWF superstars
superstars, whatever it may be,
WWE, excuse me.
What are your thoughts on MVP,
who I thought came across like a major league star
right away on the show?
What are your thoughts on him potentially having the hurt business?
Well, I don't think it matters MVP's age because he's a manager,
and I think a lot of people know who the fuck he is,
as opposed to the
federal witness protection program participants
that are on a lot of this program.
Yes, MVP should be there.
I'm pretty sure that Shelton Benjamin, however old Shelton is right now,
is in better physical condition and could stretch the living shit out of everybody on the
goddamn Ross.
I'd love to see, we see Moxley in these shoot grappling tournaments or whatever he's
doing up there in fucking Cincinnati with the Home Depot counterboy stretching him.
I'd love to see what Shelton Benjamin could do with that in.
entire goddamn roster.
I don't think he'd start a sweat until he got past number 25.
With Lashley, my only concern is
is he Andre the Giant on that roster?
Who could believably even, you know, be asked to fucking put his boots on for him?
So, my God, he's a, he's a, oh, Jesus Christ,
he's a major star again from the other company that everybody knows who
fuck he is
and the hurt business was a thing
the people watched it couldn't
it couldn't hurt
see what I did there
but no besides Lashley
you know looking like a goddamn
Japanese movie monster next to the rest of the
roster I think they would be in addition
and as I said
you know find me anybody that is in the shape
Shelton Benjamin is in on that roster
and I'll fucking eat your hat.
How's that?
Well, Brian, I know you had to have watched the next one.
The big one-on-one conflict between Maria May and Yucca Sakazaki.
Did you pay close attention to this?
First of all, let me say something.
Maria May, Mariah May.
You know, you got me doing it, your stupid nicknames.
Mariah May.
Maria Maria, Mariah, they call the wind, one of those things.
Maria May is really good.
She belongs in N.
or W.
With that said, there's a lot going on this week,
and if there was a match I was going to skip,
I thought it would be what most people every week on the show
actually skipped the women's segment,
and I went with that.
Who's your favorite baseball player on the Mets up there?
Right now, Francisco Lindor.
Well, what about if old Francisco Landell
Lindor was to have a home run hitting contest
with a fifth grader from fucking East Queens
elementary school.
Would you watch that?
You know, in
theory it could be entertaining, but in execution,
I think it would just be a really sad and pathetic thing.
I probably wouldn't watch it, no.
Well, whoever booked this ought to be executed.
Yucca was dressed like a Japanese genie in a bottle,
and what is she 12 years old?
I mean, she wouldn't qualify
for most of the rides at 6'5.
flags, would she? And then they started the match.
She's 31. She's 31 years old. Five foot two, 31 years old.
Five foot two eyes of blue looks like something from a zoo.
Trained by the DDT Dojo. Oh, I'm sure she was.
31 years old. And she must have been a heavy smoker in kindergarten,
stunned her growth. Well, you know, the genes.
you know, the inside the, uh...
Well, yeah, you need a bigger bottle.
It's like a jockey.
I guess the jockeys and genies have to naturally,
because of the demands of the profession, they have to be smaller.
They got to bring their own smoke.
They stood there and slapped each other in the face over and over.
And then they were laying some of them in.
For some unknown reason, that's a good way to lose an eardrum.
For no reason whatsoever.
Anyway, finally, Maria foiled the magical girl splash off the ropes and won the match,
and then the drama began unfolding.
Now, help me, Brian, with this.
Maria is the heel, and she beat the baby face,
and then was going to menace the baby face further,
but Willow Nightingale ran out to tell Maria,
not to do anything to yuki and this yucca yukah i'm sorry were you just going to vomit
you you ka youka you said yuki it's yuka not yuki sake sake sake okay i'm sorry not sake
not yuki sakazaka but yuka sakazaki again the last name wasn't in question i don't
know why you threw that in there but no yuka well because i had the i where the e was supposed to go
there's an A, E, I, O, and sometimes a U.
Except that you.
Well, that's true.
So then Willow, when the music played,
and Willow was standing guard over Yuka,
so Maria couldn't menace her,
then music plays,
and Willow just turns her back on Maria
to look at the music.
And that's when Maria
Seriously, what is she looking for?
There was nobody else there right then.
It was just music, so she was looking at the music.
Whoa, looking at the music all the time.
On a lazy morning.
Anyway, so when she turned around to look at the music, Maria hit her.
You know what she did, don't you?
She hit Willow, hit Willow, hit Willow, hit Willow.
with the title belt,
boom,
knocked her on her keister.
Well,
then Mitsu Erikawa came out
because of the,
she had,
it was her music.
She was just running late.
Oh,
was Mina Shurikawa?
I didn't watch this at all.
No,
you didn't say that,
but I didn't realize
that's who you were,
okay.
Yes.
She came out,
but then she was shocked
at what Maria.
A shot her?
Had,
no, she was shocked,
I say,
shocked.
Oh,
she was shot.
no we're not talking about what punishment they deserved we're talking about what actually happened
she came out but she was shocked that maria had hit willow hit willow hit willow hit willow
when willow turned to watch mitsu erikaawa's music but then maria ran to mitzu and picked her up and
hugged her and they danced.
And they danced.
Wasn't that the Hooters?
And then Yuka, who's been
down in the ring since she got beat,
she chased Maria
away from hugging
Mitsu.
But then
Mitsu and Yuka
stared at each other
because they didn't know what to think.
I didn't either. I didn't know what to think. I didn't either.
I didn't know what to think.
You talk about how many of the Tony
Con book feuds are about friendships.
This is a big one. It's about hugging.
That's a big deal to him.
Who's going to get that hug?
Who deserves the hug?
Who gets an all-out hug?
No, this is, I mean, you know,
Mina Sherikha is very attractive, and Mariah Mae
is very good in the ring, but
the vision is no.
Yeah.
It's a no, no.
I think we go back to that fifth grader at East Queen's
Elementary in the home run.
East Queens. Like there's a school called East Queens Elementary.
Well, how do you know that there isn't? Do you know every single school in all of Queens?
I'm willing to say there's no East Queens School.
Look it up right now. East School, East Queens Elementary.
Well, maybe it's a high school. I'm sorry, I may be misinformed.
Who's informing you? Who is your informant?
They send me a goddamn list of all the schools I'm supposed to stay away from.
What?
So anyway, now it's time for our main event.
So now the main event of Grand Slam is Darby Allen putting his title match that he earned before in some fashion that I've forgotten at this point.
Against Brian Danielson, or whoever the champion may be, he's putting that title shot on the line against Plummer John Moxley because Moxley said,
hey, since I put the plastic bag over Danielson's face and he can't have the match with you at Grand Slam,
even though he had a match at Grand Slam, just put your title match up against me for no reason.
And Marina Schaefer is there also.
So that's our main event, right?
You know, I got to...
What?
I was just going to say, before you get to the match, you know, even the entrance alone, there were
things to talk about.
Well, I mean,
he's got to come again
through the breezeway or the archway
or the bowels of the building
and out through the thing.
And is he a baby face or is he a heel?
He's got no heat, but people,
the crummy music he's using now
instead of
wild thing, they can't sing
along.
You know, he walked right past the people.
One guy who looked very, very
pleased to be there, patted him on the shoulder.
I'm not scared of him. They're scared of Marina
Shafir. Yeah, and
that's the thing is
you probably
I believe from what you said earlier, I can't
remember now whether it was on or off the air,
you hated this like you hate
like we both hate normal
plumber Moxley matches, right?
This is another Moxley match I could say
is one of the worst matches I've ever seen. The pacing
of it, the dead crowd,
during the pacing of it.
And just his whole style in the ring is
terrible. And this was endless.
I don't want to see Moxley anymore in the ring.
Like, I don't want to see him on a mic either.
I'm not saying, no, you can't say 20 something minutes
of Darby Allen getting thrown around like a sack of fucking dog shit
is endless.
He came out there wearing a camouflage jacket.
That's the first time he's done that.
He looked like that crazy guy in Elaine Benis's office
when he was working with Jay Peterman.
Like all of a sudden he's like,
what are you making about death?
Like all of a sudden,
the really dark guy in there
wearing the camouflage for no reason.
He wasn't in the army.
What was he wearing a camouflage jacket?
He didn't want anybody to see him.
It's become apparent that Moxley
must watch movies
and get ideas.
Because again, his idea with punk was
Rocky 3. Let's do Rocky 3.
Someone has to go back
through the TV guide
and see if there was a Rocky marathon on that weekend or something.
Well, no, no, no, because he's gone to the more obscure streaming shit now.
Well, again, now he's Neo-Moxy.
Moxie.
Moxley, Neo-Moxley.
Neo-Moxley.
Neo-Moxy?
Neo-Moxy.
He's a neo-Mox zoom dweee for all of you,
Moon Unit Zappa fans.
He's in like fucking Green Quareroy.
I don't even know what to think of this whole thing.
And again, the tough one is Marita Schaefeer,
who they never really established until a little bit on commentary here as having a legitimate
background where she can act like she's as tough as she's acting.
No, I think they said that a couple of years ago when she was actually on TV every once in a while before.
Well, then she said we didn't know her, so I'd take her at her word.
But no, here's the thing. I didn't hate this as bad as I hate most of them, even though it was
interminable. And people have done the deed, inseminated themselves.
gotten pregnant and delivered a child in less time than it took to fucking get this thing over with.
But it's more entertaining than normal to watch Moxley when it's Darby because you get to see
which way he's going to try to figure out how to cripple himself next to try to get this
fucking Shlub Moxley over and fulfill his fantasies.
You can tell he has dreams at night.
in his world of bad B movies where he's this tough guy.
Maybe one night he's Rambo.
And then the next night he's the fight club guy.
And the next night he's the Neo-Moxi from the Australian independent film.
And in real life, he wakes up the next day and he goes to get stretched in a fucking amateur
Jiu-Jitsu tournament by his one and only opponent.
but it's just
this kid
if he's willing to take these bumps
then once again
draw him back to one or two
per match and put it on
pay-per-view or would it mean this
I don't know what the fuck
this thing was supposed to mean
otherwise than to
give Moxley a four and a half-inch
stiffy over getting to be a badass
and beat somebody up
and the only way he can do it is
when the other guy's fucking half his size and letting him.
And then,
but even then,
Moxley, at one point,
not only did Darby dive through the ropes
when they had pulled up the mat
so he landed flat of his back on the wood
covering the tennis court,
then Moxley suplexed him back first on the steel stairs,
and 30 seconds later,
Darby was coming off the top with a coffin drop.
So what,
uh,
And then help me out on this because I told you about my other DVR issue earlier in the show
when it tried to skip ahead to the end of the Young Bucks match because it was fed up.
Of course they went overtime.
My DVR froze at 10 o'clock.
I recorded Modern Family after that so that I could see whatever they were going to do for a finish for whatever.
And I tried to play Modern Family and I got a black screen for 10 seconds.
it jumps to the end.
So what the fuck happened here?
That was the lights out portion.
Boy, it certainly was pitch darker than a banker's heart, I'll tell you that.
Moxley choked out Darby.
Darby was frothing.
I guess he had a bloody mouth, so it was just like orange.
It was kind of the...
Orange froth?
I thought that was a new soft drink.
Well, Tony has the money.
But that was the end.
And then someone in a hoodie ran out.
holding a blue object, a necktie, they throw back to when he was suspended with nexus
or whatever to fuck that was years ago.
Brian Danielson.
That was what fucking 10, 12 years ago?
On Justin Roberts, too.
But Brian Danielson starts choking out Moxley.
Of course, Moxley is saved by Marina Shafir.
And then eventually Claudio and Pac also hit the ring.
But Brian Danielson has nothing to worry about.
He is saved by private party, commanding.
and Alex Abramante.
Oh, no.
No.
And then he gets on the mic and he tells Moxley that he declares war,
which I thought sounded a little cheesy the way it was done.
But then he also said he was going to kick Moxley's fucking head in,
how they bleep fucking as well as head and in.
I'm glad he didn't say thank you.
So there you go.
At Russell Dream.
So wait a minute.
So hold on here.
let me just get the scorecard down here.
So there's Moxley and there's Claudio.
And Pack was out there with him?
Uh-huh.
And Schaefer.
And was there anybody else on their side?
No, I don't think so.
I don't think so.
And the other side was Danielson,
two members of private party.
That's right.
And Commander.
and Alex Aberhontes hit the ring too
Oh well and we got Alex
Right we got Alex
So let's see
Commander and Alex are offset by
Marina Schaefer
Claudio who whipped both a private party
You know it's like
Danielson declared war against
The evil forces
The evil forces of Russia
But he's leading the
Armed Forces of Lithuania into battle
possibly even Lichtenstein.
Oh boy.
All righty.
Yeah, I mean, at least private party
got a little bit of a come-upance from John Moxley
no-selling them completely in the most amazing way last week
when they got to hit the ring here.
But another team A-E-W versus weird outcast feud in some way.
Well, the question is, Brian,
did anybody watch this television program this week?
AEW Dynamite, September 25th, Grand Slam.
8 to 10.105 p.m. according to...
Do you think Denny's can sue?
I haven't seen a Denny's in years. Are they still out there?
Well, God, they're just going underground. You have to know the special knock,
and you go down the flight of stairs. It's a dark hallway, and you go,
give me some Denny's.
Well, they have good French toast, I'll say that, but AEW Dynamite, 10, 8 to 10.05 p.
On average, watch by 700,000 viewers.
Even?
Dead even, according to this.
Well, and dead being the operative word.
Well, at least they were saved the embarrassment of being in the high sixes again this week.
It's up 2% from last week, which was 687.
The trailing four weeks, 690, so it's up 1% from that.
Obviously, a big success.
Big, major, big, huge.
Where did they start in this journey into legendary status?
Again, these were compiled by WrestleMania on TBS, September 25th, 2024 for Dynamite.
Why, I said Dynamite already.
Quarter hour breakdown, here it is.
Quarter 1, 8 to 8.15 p.m.
The Nigel McGinnis Live promo, they played some songs,
and then Brian Danielson versus Nigel McGinnis begins, 802.
thousand viewers. Okay, then in that case, I'm willing to say that they're not going to
plummet as precipitously as normal, because if they're within 100,000 of their average,
they're, why, they're going to do just swell. Well, the swell continues into quarter two,
815, 8.30 p.m. Ryan Danielson versus Nigel McGinnis continued, the post-match with Kristen,
With Christian Cage, Pac, Claudio Castignoli, John Moxley.
Actually, no, they skipped the pen and Kipsavian.
The Pac-Cloidio-Moxley thing says backstage angle.
What was the angle?
Did they do that angle?
Well, they were standing there when Christian came around and looked at them
and ran off the other way, and that's the angle.
Oh, and then an ad break, 76,000 viewers.
See, I told you, that's only 30, 30.
36,000 people they lost.
That is much less than they normally lose.
So they're on a path of prosperity here.
Quarter 3, 8.30 to 8.45 p.m.
Hook versus Roderick Strong with picture and picture ads
and the post match with the Undisputed Kingdom
and a show of honor
for the Fuck the World Championship.
Yeah, you know, those Fuck the World people,
they're always honorable.
724,000 viewers.
See, and now they're only down 78,000 from the start,
and normally it's well into six figures by now,
so this is a rousing return to form for these fine folks.
Well, we go now to quarter four, 845 to 9 p.m.,
the postmatch with Hook, Taz, and a retired belt,
the ad break,
the start of the Young Bucks versus Kyle Fletcher and Will Osprey
with picture and picture ads.
679,000 viewers.
Ouch. Okay.
So now they're down
123,000
and they're going into the 9 o'clock hour
with the
buckaroos in the ring, and they normally
hemorrhage viewers.
So did they pick any up at the top of the 9 o'clock hour
even though the buckaroos were in the ring?
Quarter of five, the big 9 o'clock
hour 9 to 9.15 p.m.
The continuation of the Bucks versus
Fletcher and Osprey with picture and picture
ads. The
Conglomeration Rocky Romero
backstage promo.
708,000
viewers. Well,
so they picked up
29,000
people. To be
only the second lowest
rated quarter hour so far,
but now the question becomes
when the people tuned in at the
top of the hour, and they were fed about another 10 minutes of the lollipop guild.
Did they turn around and head out the door again?
Well, we go to, what is this, quarter six, 915 and 9.30 p.m., the Prince Nana MVP ramp angle,
an ad break, and Mariah Mae versus Yucasakazaki, 638,000 viewers.
Ouch, okay, so apparently 70,000 people said, oh, hell no.
And now we are at the official lowest quarter hour of the show so far and down
164,000 people.
Well, we go to quarter 7, 930 to 945 p.m.
The continuation of May versus Sakazaki and the postmatch with Willow nightingale and Mina Shirakawa,
an ad break, and the start of John.
Mockley versus Darby Allen, 615,000 viewers.
Ouch, so even though they knew that it was safe because the buckaroos had already come and gone,
apparently they're as confused as we are about why they wanted to see Plummer versus Darby.
Well, that match continues into quarter eight.
I remind you, we have a six-minute overrun.
quarter 8, 9.45 to 10 p.m.
John Moxley v. Darby Allen continued picture and picture ads.
684,000 viewers.
Six-minute overrun, including the post-match with Claudio Casignoli,
PAC, Marina Shafir, Brian Danielson, private party, and commander,
708,000 viewers.
Okay, so apparently,
they did want to see poor old Darby.
They just had to hide and make sure
that the Buccaroos were gone.
They picked up, hold on, what is this?
69,000 people from quarter 7 to quarter 8,
so we discount the overrun
because it's usually down, in this case, it's up,
but only 24,000 people.
That's people tuning in for the next fucking show.
they started again strong and couldn't stop the people from leaving.
They came back pretty much only at the end after they knew that all the rest of this
caca I was over with.
That's an accomplishment.
Because you know what?
There's been a lot of weeks where the main event stuff was the last segment into the
overrun and people left Brian Danielsson, Swirb Strickland, a bunch of things.
They liked Darby.
I mean, again, it didn't go up to 8.50.
or anything. But that match, it went from 6.15, and the overrun ended at 708. So that's better than
everything else driving people away. Oh, speaking of driving people away. We made have driven
our listeners away with this. It's way too much. We need to cut back on this. All right. And we
shall do that right now. Because we're done with it. We're going to time travel. I thought it was
going to sustain itself for a little bit there.
in the future.
We are in the future.
That couldn't sustain itself.
No.
Yeah.
Thank you for announcing we've landed.
Please put your breakable Home Depot wrestling tables in their upright position.
That sounded like some kind of state early warning system to get people to go to their basement.
Do we have any listeners left?
Or has the rest of the program taken care of that already?
What happens?
All right.
we've established where we are.
Yeah, we've established a lot there with that.
I know we still have more, yet there's more.
Yes, more. There's more.
So I will shoot now to Jim Cornett.
Here's the star of the experience.
Mr. Jim Cornett.
We're doing another segment.
See, I'd like to be able to say that this will make sense to the podcast listeners
when we put it all together, but there's no possible way it's going to.
So, folks, we'll just, we'll fly with this.
We just talked about the AEW ratings for this past week or whatever it was,
whenever you hear this thing.
And there was something on Twitter, and I'm not understanding it.
Tony Storm did an interview.
Yeah, let me pull this up because this was being sent to me earlier today as we are recording.
Because this is obviously one of these, she's in character with Ben Mankowitz or whatever.
this is not like a legitimate statement.
She's not with Ben Mancowitz.
She's in Japan for We Are Stardom.
Well, but I mean, she's in character.
She's delusional over there like she's delusional over here on the screen, on the silver screen.
Well, yeah, I think she's falling in love with the performance, and she's certainly committed to it.
And let's go to this audio now.
Stop it whenever you want to say something.
Oh, boy.
To make a long story short,
I once had a three-month love affair with Stan Hansen
But now last night together
As my back was dripping with what turned out to be chewing tobacco
He turned to me and he gave me some advice
He said when you're in Japan
You are a foreigner
But when they step into the ring with you
She's making a face and looking at her opponent
Whoever that may be
They are in your country.
Oh.
Then he gave me a lariat, but not with his arm.
No.
My own you and time.
Oh, let me stop it there.
You know, things you wouldn't necessarily hear on, well, yeah, I guess you could hear it on American wrestling TV.
Well, there was, there was no profanity involved.
it was all the theater of the mind.
You know, how could I not like her
if she's making Stan Hanson
a fair joke?
Again, for the
people of Japan, especially the
wrestling press and the wrestling conscious
public of Japan, and
again, like the United States, there was a lot more of them
30 or 40 years ago than there is
right now.
Everybody knows who's
Stan Hanson is he was the most
revered
foreigner in all
I guess in history
right for his longevity
he had more tours than anybody
yeah
you know you could talk about Terry and Dory and you can talk
about Abdullah and a few
other select individuals but
Stan Hanson's right up there so if she
had to pick somebody
to have the
menage
of whatever the fuck with it would be
it would be the lariat.
I don't think she said there was any menaging going on.
Well, I don't know what they were massaging or menaging, whatever.
The terminology is of what is the terminology in Japan for an illicit carnal knowledge of someone?
I'm not sure, but knowing how thorough the Japanese wrestling press are,
do you think anyone's going to call Stan Hanson for comment?
You know, there's got to be at least somebody.
Remember, where was the photographer in Mexico?
that took down Don Callas, Conan!
He believed an angle, right?
If the guy was there as a photographer
and took down the heel manager,
there's got to be somebody over in Japan.
It's like, oh, shit, we better verify this before we...
And I don't know if Stan's still married.
I don't know if that phone call would be well-received
at the Hanson household.
And Mrs. Hanson says,
we can't get your husband.
Any comments on Tony's...
Storm saying she had a three-month love affair with him.
In Japan, where you weren't.
Then she'll think, he'll come home.
Were you screwing around with Tony Rose?
I thought it was all platonic with Moolah's girls back in the day.
Well, let's, uh, we'll hear the end of this.
Oh, there's more, there's more.
I thought giving her a lariat without his fucking arm would kind of be the finish of this, but go ahead.
And, uh, the tobacco juice dripping down her.
That's what she thought it was.
She, uh, this is her talking about her opponent,
Mayu Iwatani.
You are stepping into my country.
But your visa is about to expire.
Only you, the same way I did five years ago.
Questioning your life choices.
Godzilla doesn't have my thighs.
Mothra doesn't have my flaps.
Oh my God.
And when I am IWGP women's champion, Japan will crumble at my feet.
So, my son, tits out.
All right, well, there's a time was Tony Storm from Tokyo.
Well, she knows how to get over there.
She didn't even just mention Godzilla.
She mentioned Mothra, too.
Hanson, Godzilla, and Mothra.
She hit the big three, the trilogy of Japanese pop culture.
And again, I'm wondering, and see, I don't know.
Maybe I'm, you know, just clueless, but does the whole Sunset Boulevard,
black and white, old movie, Turner Classic movie thing, does that translate in Japan, or do they
know what the fuck is going on with this?
Or would they be in on it?
Well, this is on their Twitter. Again, it's in English.
When she is shown at the table at the press conference, it's in black and white, her
opponent, who's on the other side of the man holding the microphone in between them,
she's in color.
Well, no, I'm not, I'm not doubting that.
What I'm saying is that they're presenting that way.
What I'm saying is, does the average Japanese wrestling fan or viewer in general,
of this, you know, thing, do they get the American fascination with the classic movies and the
Sunset Boulevard and Gloria Swanson and what she's doing here? All about Eve, whatever movie
they're stealing from. This is probably an audience that does, but a lot of other people
just think she's a wacky white woman. Well, see, there you go, because we've got, you know,
these five-foot-tall Japanese picks. He's dressed up like Barbara Eden and I dream of Jeannie,
and we're going, what the fuck is going on here? We have no right.
to complain. We sent them something from 20 years earlier in black and white. Yeah, so I'm thinking,
do they think the same thing? Like, what the fuck is this? What is happening here? I don't know.
Wayneville Vince ends up running and ending up in Japan and they take pictures of them and like,
oh, look, another guy looking like a 1940s movie star.
Did the Japanese have any concept of Snidly Whiplash?
See, Snitley Whiplash had like a Raleigh Fingers kind of thing going, didn't he?
Well, I'd help me with Raleigh Fingers.
I know he plays baseball.
The mustache curled out.
It wasn't just like a little Clark Gable.
Well, I'm saying Ernie Kovacs then.
Ernie Kovacs works, yeah.
Ernie Kovic.
Do the Japanese people, they have an affinity for Ernie Kovacs and his brand of 50s
wacky, innovative television comedy?
I was going to say at times, WWE was like some kind of
weird perverted Ernie Kovacs version of wrestling.
Can you really think about it?
That's true, maybe.
Vince was watching Dr. Jerry Graham and Ernie Kovacs.
He must have been.
He must have been.
Oh, Christ.
Well, and Ernie Kovacs would fuck up a car and a heartbeat for a gag, right, for 10 seconds.
Should they have brought up the fact in the documentary that Dr. Jerry Graham also went
completely insane and also had weird issues with, you know, his mom?
With his mother?
Yeah.
considering he's such a big influence on Vince
you know I think they should have almost pointed out
yeah it wasn't just this little part he was also a complete drunk who
did some of the craziest things ever
well and of course Vince was not
you know alcohol was not his issue
but the mother fixation of some description
grams was different in that
you know he always of course for the people who don't know what we're talking
about. Even though he was a
proliferous
fucking womanizer and money's
waster and
you know, just wore the suits
and the Cadillacs and lit the cigars
with the $100 bills and a whole nine yards,
Jerry Graham always sent money home to his mother in Phoenix.
And then
when she died, or when she was in a hospital,
he actually threatened the doctor
nothing bad better happened to her.
and then she died
and he went to the hospital
with a shotgun
and a hunting knife
and broke into the place
and golf clubs
golf clubs
and his son
in the parking lot sitting in a car
and
he fought his way to her room
and where her body still was
and stole her body had it over her
shoulder
flinging orderlies against the wall.
The cops were outside.
They stopped him and apparently took repossession of the body.
And he ended up going to, I just want to take her home.
He was screaming.
And they would put him in the mental home for a period of time.
And then somehow he convinced him not to very long a period of time
that he was okay because he was charming like that.
And then he found out that she had left all of her money to some wacky church
that he had left her all that time.
And then he was penniless.
Was it a wacky church?
I thought it was the Reverend Billy Graham, funny enough, considering the last name.
Well, that wacky church, you know, some televangelist, whatever the fuck, some scam.
And then he pretty much was broke from that point on in his name.
his life.
That was Vince's hero.
What do you think Dr. Jerry Graham thought from his perspective when all of a sudden the
teenage son of Vince McMahon, the promoter, wants to ride around town with you and
dyes his hair?
Did they even bring that up in there that he bleached his hair?
I don't remember if they mentioned it.
You know what?
I think I seem to remember somebody may have said it in passing.
But yeah, no, bleached blonde hair on Vince Jr. in the 50s.
That had to be.
It was the same thing they did with Sputnik Monroe in Memphis in the, in 1959.
All the kids in their high school yearbook had bleach blonde spots in the front of their hair.
But still, just the whole idea, you know, Dad, can I talk to you? Vinny, I'm busy.
Go hang out with Dr. Jerry Graham.
Yeah.
Go right around town with Dr. Jerry Graham.
What?
How'd that happen?
I bet you that Vince Sr. found out about it after the fact.
I wouldn't think that he would let anybody
you know
go with much less his 15 year old son
go in a car with Jerry Graham
found that about it when he saw the hair
but that's that's the thing is still there was this just
you know
flamboyance and
extrovert showmanship
and mental illness
of various descriptions and involving mothers
there's got to be something there
Yeah, and also you got to really think about him as one of the underrated, when you think about who he influence, one of the most influential people, because an influence on the child Vince McMahon, obviously Eddie Graham spending as much time with Dr. Jerry Graham, and people did say he had good ideas, it's just he was a reckless drunk.
Yeah.
Who you couldn't trust.
Well, would Eddie Graham have made the money to buy into the Florida territory if he hadn't had that two-year run, would you?
Jerry Graham in the biggest territory in the country.
And right there you have two of the most influential bookers ever, Vince McMahon and Eddie Graham.
No, I should say influential. Vince wasn't influential. Vince was powerful. One of the more
powerful bookers. Well, not even really Booker because he still never booked himself the
nuts and bolts. He gave the direction. He set the feuds. But I don't know that you could ever
call Vince the Booker because he always had somebody.
somebody handling a locker room
from the earliest days
did he always set the feuds
if the ones that mattered
or the ones that were going to draw any money
or the with the stars or the talent
that he wanted to put on top
it was if you had a great idea
he would listen to it but he was pretty much saying
well we're going to go from this guy to that guy
and that guy to that guy for Undertaker
or Sean or Brett or whatever the era was
the top guys
All right, this has been Stan Hansen Pornow Talk.
Well, I'm on the experience.
You know, and I'm warned out.
I'm ready for a good night's sleep.
You know, give her credit.
Those are good lines.
He hit me with a lariat and wasn't his arm.
Good lines, clever lines.
She's obvious.
I think Ben Mankowitz is working for, is writing for.
Yeah, I guess the issue is, I forgive me for cutting you off there.
I was going to say, well, that's all right.
It hit me on this very professional program.
that the issue may be having this three-month
Torrid love affair lost in translation style in Japan,
I don't know if they have a fine mattress
like a Helix sleep over there.
Well, you know, because that could have been part of the problem
as why maybe their relationship didn't work out
because, you know, with the weight of Stan Hanson
giving you a lariat going over and over again
on a mattress that wasn't built for,
well just plus size people
well you might have serious issues there
complete spinal stenosis
possibly a fracture of the sacroiliac
and the coxics on the phroboxics
that's what you're talking about right
you need some support
well of course you need some support
or maybe you want a little less support
well you need some support
where you won't fall through the floor
well of course you want that much support
but I'm talking about on the mattress some like it firm
some want it soft
some like it hot
well whatever you want
the folks at helix have got it for you our friends
over at helix sleep boy i'll tell you what
they make everything
20 unique mattresses
the award winning lux collection
the ultra premium elite collections
as a matter of fact you've got to be
DNA tested to be
personally related
to Maddie and Nikki the Jackson
Boys to purchase an elite
mattress. They only let people
that are blood relatives sleep
on these things. They've got
the Helix Plus, a mattress designed
for big and tall sleepers, so if you're
just, if you've just given
up and said, fuck it, I waste 700 pounds
and just cut the
wall out of the house whenever you have to drag
me out of here. They got a
mattress for you, pal.
And the Helix Kids
mattress that is designed
for growing bodies. Now, Brian, you've
told me that that
that doesn't mean that when the kids sleep on the mattress it will cause them to grow abnormally large.
Is that correct?
It's not actually designed for growing bodies.
It's designed to be there to support the bodies that grow as bodies naturally grow with time here in the ecosystem on Earth.
So it's just then they've only, they've got fertilizer in them, but it's a natural kind.
No, there's no fertilizer.
There are no chemicals.
there are no fertilizers, nothing with manure.
None of this.
Well, if it's for kids, every once in a while,
there's probably going to be some manure.
Well, no.
Again, let's talk about for the growing body.
Yes, these mattresses are designed to help grow the bodies of your children
in every direction, but they won't get too big, is what you're saying.
They don't do anything to change the size of your children.
They are there to support your children as they grow,
and as their minds grow, and they need a lot of rest on a,
comfortable mattress, they can get it from Helix Sleep.
Well, talking about their minds, I can get them a couple free pillows, too, so that'll
work out for their heads also.
Do their heads grow larger?
Oh, my God.
When they, well, it's a children's pillow.
Well, nevertheless, folks, no matter what kind of mattress you want, they've got a hundred-night
trial period.
They've got 10 to 15-year warranties on these bad boys.
and they come direct delivered to your home in a box
that you can just open up and poof, there it becomes,
right there in your bedroom or wherever you want to put in your mattress
so that you can sleep or grow your children.
But I mentioned the pillows and a discount right now.
If you go to helixleep.com,
that's h-e-l-I-X-Sleep.com
slash JCE
you're going to get 25%
off all mattresses
and two free pillows
so I assume you have sheets
if you don't
maybe they can help you look around at the website
but what are you some kind of fucking bum you don't have a set of sheets
oh will you leave them a little I don't even know who I'm defending right now
but you can get that bed you can't defending sheetless people
you can get the bed and get your own sheets when he'll sleep
well you can't get the bed you can get the mattress you got to have a bed or at least a
lore to put it on.
Helix can't do everything for you,
but you're just out here defending the sheet list,
people that don't give a sheet.
Right now, go to helixleep.com
slash JCE 25% off and two free pillows.
This is, it is not going to last long.
The offer, the mattress will last 10 to 15 years minimum.
But the offer will not last long
because better sleep starts now with heat,
Helix, not three weeks from now, so don't dick around.
Have they been suitably chastised about not dicking around?
Who, the audience?
Yes.
I don't think anyone's dicking around, and a lot of people just want to lay down,
or maybe even Dick It Down, and you need a good mattress, Helix Sleep.
One more time, what's that promo code, Jim?
J-C-E, Mr. Dick It Down.
All right, this show's been a great episode.
I'm glad it's your show.
Well, what are you doing?
My show is going to be very professional this week, very tight and professional.
Well, why don't you tell the people what all kinds of professional programs you're doing on the wrestling news
and the Arcadian Vanguard network this week then, for heaven's sake?
Of course, the most professional is the wrestling news.
Get your wrestling news every day for free.
Every morning, get the wrestling news.
Morning newscast with all of the news, none of the opinion, none of the paywall.
Get it directly from the wrestling news.com or wherever you find your favorite podcast.
Arcadian Vanguard's, the wrestling news.
Want to make mention once again
of something I mentioned last week,
the latest episode of Shut Up and Wrestle with Brian Salman,
the best of, volume one.
I'm on there, where Brian tells me his story
about how he killed Crash Holly.
Hear that and so much more,
SUAWPod.com,
wherever you find your favorite podcast,
shut up and wrestle with Brian Salman,
and of course, the 605 Super Podcast.
The Mothership!
Well, thank you very much.
Go through the archive,
605 pod.
com available wherever you find your favorite podcast.
I promise you were working on stuff,
but there's been a lot of outside of recording things happening lately.
But things should be changing soon.
The mothership.
Yes.
And we've got rid of that whole page there.
Well, now we've got to talk about the Smackdown, don't we?
Because we would be remiss if we didn't talk about the Smackdown.
And I don't know if you have this information, Brian,
if it's publicly available.
But is the pay...
And have I asked this question before,
and you probably answered it?
And I just, I don't remember.
Is the paycom center in Oklahoma City
a new building, or is that...
Did we establish that the myriad,
somebody said they had closed it
or repurposed it?
The old arena there in town?
Paycom Center was originally known
as the Ford Center
from 2002 to 2010
and then it was the Oklahoma City
Arena from 2010
to 2011.
Then it was the Chesapeake Energy Arena.
Jesus Christ. And then
Chesapeake Energy became
one of those energy companies that must have run out of money
because then Paycom jumped in
and they stole the arena rights.
Remember what it was
it's been Freedom Hall in Louisville
Kentucky since
1956.
What the fuck?
Um, well the, what happened?
to the Myriad, M-Y-R-I-A-D, if you're Googling.
What happened?
That was a nice, beautiful, that was the nicest building in the Mid-South Territory in
1984.
Just beautiful.
Right downtown, how could they have, how could they have repurposed that or whatever?
Was it the Myriad Convention Center?
Yes, yes.
Seated 13,000 people.
Prairie Surf Studios, which was originally the,
the Myriad Convention Center and later the Cox Convention Center is a film production complex
located in downtown Oklahoma City.
Good Lord.
It was a former convention center and the home of several minor league teams.
So that encompasses an arena that seated 13,000 people and they just said,
fuck it, we're going to make it a fucking film studio?
Well, someone must have purchased it.
WCW. Thunder aired from there February 12, 1998.
well whoopty ding as mama cornet would say
the last stampede emanated from there in 1984
and we had more people
anyway at the paycom center here in Oklahoma City
smackdown on September 27th had a nice looking crowd
do we have any idea how many people were there
have I thrown you a monkey range
how many things you need me to look at at once
well we've seen your keeper out here
you and Mr. I ain't
got it today. If I'm here, you're here.
And we are here and we are all together.
Cuckoo Coo Coo Coo!
You know who gets a big reaction in Oklahoma City while we find out how many people
gave him that reaction? Randy Orton.
Who came to the ring to open the program, got a big reaction,
the Randy Chance.
And again, it was the same formula.
their guys are so over now the main event guys
that all they have to do is come out
a couple of you know
platitudes welcome to smackdown
great to be here whatever and then
in two or three sentences
they just lay out the premise and then they get interrupted
and the people are right with it
they don't can and then you see another
three minute fucking entrance or whatever
but Randy said I can count
the people that I trust on one hand,
but Cody Rhodes is one of those.
And that's why, you know,
Cody's agreed to team up with Roman.
That doesn't sit right with me,
and I need an explanation.
I wish Cody would come out of here
and give me that explanation.
And in, boom, they play Cody music,
and here's another big reaction,
another bunch of Cody chance,
and another three minutes of entrance
while the announcers just get to sell shit.
Do we have a crowd yet?
According to Russell Ticks, 8,196 tickets distributed.
Well, son of a gun, they shoot it big.
I would have thought they had more than that.
So I guess our record from the last stampede is still safe.
I bet the gate here this time was a little bit bigger.
Just a skunch.
And then Cody says,
I may be a fool to team with Roman,
but I'd rather be a fool than a coward.
And he's, you know, he's kept his word with other things he'd done.
I believe he's, I'm going to take him at his word here,
and the fans are going to take him at his word.
And so then, you know, Cody's like, it's time for the rogue bloodline to be killed,
and I hope it's not a problem for you, Randy.
And they look at each other and they shake hands.
and Randy says no problem unless you make it a problem.
And then before everybody gets chance to go,
ooh, and Cody can say anything, Owens' music plays.
Because here comes this professional malcontent.
And as a matter of fact, that would probably,
I would have given him that gimmick.
The malcontent.
He can find the turd in any punch bowl,
the rotten fucking apple.
in any barrel.
He can find out what's wrong with anything.
But anyway, Owens comes the ring.
And Brian, we've talked about the idea
of maybe him, he, he, he, he, maybe he going,
maybe he going to AEW for millions of dollars
to be with his friends because his contract is coming up
at some point.
And have you noticed he's getting
a lesser reaction than the Orton's and the Rhodeses
and the Usoes is and the Romans
and the other people.
Even a little bit less maybe than Sammy now, because Sammy has that
Oh, he's getting a lot less than Sammy.
Well, yeah, that warm, fuzzy likeability.
So do you think it's time for him to
have new scenery and take somebody else's
millions of dollars.
I think if he wants to spend time with his family and make more money than he's ever made
before and not feel, hey, you know, I don't know, I was about saying not feel as creatively
happy, but he would probably be very happy.
He would love that shit.
He would love that shit over there.
Because you can, I can kind of tell, he's already been kind of fucking impatient with some
of the shit he's been given lately.
But he came to the ring and he didn't get a chance to say anything.
He gets in the ring and boom, bloodline music.
And all four of them come out to ringside.
And now the people are booing and they're chanting OTC.
They won't acknowledge solo.
And Solo's deal is the two in the ring with you, Cody,
they're no help.
They can't stop us.
You can't stop us.
so you're teaming with Roman because these two let you down every time and that's when
Owens jumps in and tells Solo off and he says okay they got the Cody's got the match he wants
so tonight Solo and Fatu against Randy and Owens and Cody steps in and so well there's three
and whatever the fuck we can have a six man and that's when Owen says no you have yours
at Blad Blood.
Over at Blad Blood, you've got your match.
Tonight is me and Orton.
So there's the tension there.
But Orton and Cody are still being presented as the buddies
and it's the malcontent that is stirring stuff up.
And I think this is possibly a masterful red herring.
What do you think?
Well, for long-term book,
if they're not going to rush anything with Orton, the fact that he's trying to be the peacemaker here,
it always goes back to what you say.
When he finally turns on Cody, it's going to mean a lot if they don't tease that forever.
Instead, they're teasing Owens, and we'll see what happens at Blad Blood.
That's going to be, everything's going to be on the blind at Blad Blood.
And later on in this program, they have another segment where Cody and Orton and Owens are in the back,
and Cody said, Kevin, we need to talk.
And, and Owen said, I don't know.
Got the match.
Got the thing about the match.
Match coming up.
Some other time we'll talk, you know, afterwards.
And he tells Cody, don't come out there tonight.
Focus on your match.
Your match.
I'll stay at home with the children.
Focus on your match.
Don't come out there tonight.
And he leaves and then Orton says, hey, if those Tongas come out there,
it's four against two, I would love to have your help.
So please come out there.
And then he's, you know, he's going to go talk to Owens or whatever the fuck.
So again, Owens is the red herring, I think, by just being a grumpy fuck that probably
in the end won't stab anybody in the back, but it gets a chance for them to show more
of the bond that Orton and Cody have with each other.
That's why the McGuffin, if you will, is Owens.
But that's just my opinion, and who am I?
And if Owens does leave, they're booking it right now,
so they have multiple options to get out of this.
Yes, and in the meantime, he's not really beating anybody important.
And when I said, but who am I, you were supposed to tell me who I am?
Uh, one of my, swerves house. What do I say here?
What?
anyhow, they had a match then where the winner
would get a match with the refrigerator
and that was for the title
and Bailey wrestled Naomi
and Bailey won with an elbow drop off the top rope.
It was thrilling.
You should have seen it.
Did you see it?
Did you care about it?
I wanted to watch it, but I was running long in time.
I saw parts of it.
It seemed like the fans were really into it.
Well, good for them.
I'm glad they enjoyed their night out.
Hey, it says something that the fans are reacting to the women's division here with stars,
at least some of them, because I see some dead matches on Raw,
but they also have some women there who maybe shouldn't be there.
But you compare that with AEW or anywhere else.
You know, Bailey's a star.
Naya Jacks, whatever you think of her,
I think they successfully got her over as a star.
I mean, none of those fans are watching for her work rate.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah.
So, yeah, it seemed like they had a hot finish.
Yeah, well, you know, the Macy's parade floats are over too every year, so it can be done.
It's coming up.
Coming up.
So apparently, well, L.A. Knight and Andrade and Carmelo Hayes are still all kind of ticked off at each other.
And L.A. and Andrade were talking when Hayes runs in from off camera and just body checks L.A.
night over an equipment case. And when he fell on the other side, it's like he can.
kept going into a hole.
He disappeared.
And you never heard a word.
You never saw a movement.
And the camera lingered as Hayes and Andrade.
It looked at each other and had their interaction.
And then the camera lingers on Andrade.
And there's no, not even like from behind the case,
help me.
Help me.
Nothing.
Just, fuck it.
He just, he fell over the case and he was gone.
it would sound like that right help me
and her
I cook oh my god
good Lord I can't get out
At least Andrade's hanging out in the back
And he's not involved in punching out one of the other wrestlers
So then
They had the
Match between Carmelo Hayes and André
They're having a best of five series
And this was match number six
Best of seven
What is starting
The graphics said best of five.
It was a best of five series that is now is going,
now is going to go to four out of seven, apparently.
But match six.
This was good.
Well, sure.
If you were these people's immediate family, you loved it.
The fans there got into it.
It was a fun match.
Yeah, well, the fans there like fucking wearing other people's underwear.
How's that?
I don't know what that means.
Well, are they stealing it or they just have it?
They steal it or they have it?
Well, there's an entire exchange marketplace where I can give you the website.
I guess it's an insult depending on how you obtain the underwear, but nevertheless, nevertheless.
That's going to be my masked wrestler gimmick, nevertheless.
But nevertheless, back to Smack.
Good match is what they had here.
It was a good match and the fans got into it.
And L.A. night, of course, got involved.
Did you see the finish?
Yes, yes, I did.
L.A. Knight came out, and he went for Hayes,
but Andrade stopped him,
and Hayes knocked Andrade into L.A. Knight,
and then rolled Andrade up, one, two, three,
and then L.A. Knight and Andrade argued with each other,
and my takeaway was dealing with these two fucking slubs,
does nothing for L.A. Knight.
When he got so over, and everybody else that was so over
is interacting with other people that are so over,
and he's stuck over here with these fucking Cretans.
There's something about Andre, Andre, Andre, I can't fucking do it.
Ladies and gentlemen, I have nothing today.
There's something about Andrade that I get a kick out of.
From the promos to whatever his gimmick or personality,
there's something about it.
I almost wanted to see him in LA Nine like a buddy kind of situation.
He could be L.A. Knight's buddy.
And L.A. Night's only way to understand him.
you have just said that you like a guide you could not enunciate or enumerate one single attribute of his that you like but you i like that guy
something about him that something about him you know it's like Naomi she comes out there she glows how do you
not like that she makes you want to get up and move yes away from the television but that was a good
match the point is it was a good match and they're trying you know what they're trying to get carmillo over
We'll see how it goes
The best of seven
They've been trying to cure cancer for 150 years
And well, I guess longer than that, maybe
I mean, when did the effort start?
Who knows?
I don't think they knew what it was before fucking
the Civil War, did they?
Oh, he's got the dry rot.
Is the Civil War 150 years ago?
Well, 160 now, almost.
Who's counting?
Well, I was counting.
That's why I corrected you, but let's go back
back to Smackdown.
Well, what does Andre have to do with the Civil War?
Well, nothing.
There was a Mexican Civil War, wasn't there?
Well, yes, but there was a Spanish-American war, too, so should we still be mad at him?
The point is that I don't think that L.A. Knight is getting anything done for him here,
but you're talking about people marching to the beat of their own drummers?
Well, I think that what? What did you say?
I asked you this a couple weeks ago, I think.
Who would you have L.A. Night work with right now?
Anybody else but these people.
Chad Gable would be entertaining with L.A. Knight, because he could be a little weasel and talk if they get rid of his crew and get him away from the Wyatt's.
He's got some heat.
L.A. Knight could tell him off.
I don't know.
Where was I going with that?
L.A. Knight's one of the only guys not in a faction.
It's becoming like A.W. a few years ago. Everyone has a group.
Well, L.A. doesn't, he's not outgoing and makes friends easily.
That's the problem. He's stuck in his shell. He's an introvert.
Where were you going?
I don't know. But have I mentioned that our friends over at Racon sell everyday wireless earbuds that you just got to have?
Every day?
Every day they're selling another pair. I think yesterday they sold two pair.
Wow.
And they are made to make your everyday, just.
a little bit easier. They've added new features to make them even more easy to use. That's the
way it's written. Even more easy to use. That should be just even easier to use, right?
But nevertheless, it's easy for you to say, the everyday earbuds feature a 32-hour battery
life, multi-point connectivity that lets you pair two devices together. It sounds perverted to me,
but if you want to do it, as long as they're consenting age.
And there's active noise cancellation, which you just stick them in there, you can't hear
at thunder.
You could be run over by a train coming at you from behind.
You'd never know it.
And actually, that makes it easier, because if you know that train is coming,
boy, the last 10 seconds of your life is going to be fucking miserable.
Where is this happening?
You're running away, you're running on the train tracks away from the direction?
of the train?
Well, would you, would you be running toward it?
Why are you running on the train tracks?
Why are you running on the train tracks?
Get away from the train.
What are you, an imbecile?
What, but, there's nowhere else to go?
Well, if there was, you wouldn't be on the tracks, would you?
What are you on a bridge?
Is it a long bridge?
It could be.
It could be, it could be the longest bridge you ever see in your life if you go get away from
that train.
That's why you need recons.
No, the longest bridge I think was seed earlier this show.
Well, there's the, did I mention the quick charge function
where you can plug these things in for 10 minutes
and you'll get 90 minutes of battery, just boom, if you just like that.
That's tremendous. You did not mention it already today.
Well, the ergonomic design to fit comfortably in the widest range of ears,
whether they be giant elephant ears or small little shell-like ears,
you can shove these things in and they actually expand
somewhat to meld with your skin.
No, there's no melding with your skin, no.
Well, because that way if they grow in slightly, then that sound baffles even better.
When the skin grows to the optimal gel tips, then it causes it to be like a spray foam insulation.
And that way you don't get extra outside noise involved.
You don't get any of this noise because none of this noise is true.
Every spot starts out innocent enough and then it turns out the EC Comics all of a sudden.
I'm not, I don't know what's the matter.
Why would you want these things growing on in your head?
Because with the battery life, they've got 32 hours, and the earbud tap functions reduce discomfort.
It says right here the earbud tap functions to reduce discomfort when using the earbuds.
So let's say your hemorrhoids are acting up.
You got these earbuds or your ear, boom, you use the tap functions.
And boy, a lot less three.
robbing and burning.
It reduces discomfort, folks, and...
And comes out of your ear, let's just make sure it doesn't melt to your skin.
We want to make sure we clarify that.
Well, and also, they offer a 30-day happiness guarantee.
So right there, you're going to be happy for a month at least.
And then it'll wear off, and then you'll be sorry you were ever born.
No, you will be happy with Raycon.
Well, if you can be happy with anything, but some people just can't ever be.
happy. Stop the fuss, folks. Go to buy raycon.com slash JCE today because listen to this.
20 to 50% off. 20 is normal. 25 is generous. 50% that's crazy. Crazy Eddie is taking over Raycon.
20 to 50% off sidewide. Of course, depending on what it is, but you will get up to 50% off
off everything on Raycon's website
buy Raycon.com
slash JCE with you
using that code of course
if you don't use the code they won't take your money
they'll say fuck you go home
so use the code
enjoy the earbuds whether you are
someone wants to enjoy the day or
if you are depressed and want to hear sad
song I don't know why you would want to hear sad songs
if you were down but
hear whatever you want the choice is yours with
Raycon one more time promo
with Jim
J.C.E.
Sad songs say so much.
And also, if you're going to plan on getting hit by a train in the next week or two.
Don't plan on that.
Well, if it's going to come up in your schedule, you need a set of earbuds quick.
It won't be coming up in your schedule.
Stay off the tracks.
Avoid the third rail with Raycon.
Back to Smackdown, Jim.
Well, now, that's not train tracks.
There's no third rail on a railroad track.
You're thinking of a subway track now.
Who would be stupid enough to be running away from a subway train?
The Long Island Railroad has a third rail.
Well, all of all the trains that I've seen in the Wild Wild West,
they just got, they just.
Wild West, really.
They just have two rails, one on each side,
and the guy throws the coal or the wood in and the woo, woo, voo, nah.
And the Long Island Railroad, third rail,
because every few years some kid electrocutes himself,
not realizing that whenever it says you're going to electrocate yourself,
it really will happen when you touch it.
Well, it seems like that would be a public health menace.
If they just had that, do they have this walled off or fenced off or something
where people can't just wander and just walk across the railroad tracks like we do down here in the country?
No, it's kind of just right there.
But speaking of right there, right back to Smackdown.
Right back to Smackdown.
There's a place over here in Pewee Valley where the railroad tracks goes down beside of the road.
and when you turn left to go across the railroad tracks, there's a hump,
and then you go down the other side and you turn to go out to Crestwood.
And son of a bitch, there's a truck that's bottoming out and getting stuck there all the time.
One of these 18-wheeler's tractor-trailers tries to go across that,
and it gets stuck right on that hump in the middle,
and then they have to call a tow truck to come and lift it off the fucking thing.
You'd think they'd learn.
I understand that's where Tony Kahn's opening their developmental territory,
Pee Wee Valley wrestling.
Peewee Valley, yeah.
Actually, it's a hell of a market.
It's untapped.
So back to Smackdown.
Mia Yom wrestled Piper Niven.
Piper Niven.
That name sounds like she should have been a movie actress in the 50s.
Like Piper Lorry and David Niven.
Actually, David Niven looks nothing like Piper Lorry.
And Piper Niven doesn't look like anything like either one of them.
and this didn't look like a match I wanted to watch, so I didn't.
Did I miss anything?
I had limited time this week.
Yeah, yeah, time.
I didn't watch the Meechard match.
Yeah, so, and then there was some more fake, scripted, poorly acted interaction with girls in the back.
And then we came to our main event of the evening, Brian.
Kevin Owens and Randy Orton against Jacob Fatou and Solo.
And I know wrestling sometimes has to stretch credibility for the entertainment value,
but watching Owens' fat-ass go toe-to-to-to with two badass Samoans just fucking
stretches that credibility for me like a rubber band, but we will go with it.
Again, Orton and Fatu working together, it gives Fatu credibility.
Orton did the deal where he picks him up and drops him up and drop.
pops him on the announced desk like he does everybody, and Jacob pops up.
And it's like, ah!
And if you did that with everybody, it would be bullshit like it is when they do it with everybody.
But when you do it with this one monster, then it registers with people as,
ah, shit, that didn't hurt him.
But then Orton grabs him and does three more in a row.
Boom, boom, boom, and that he has to sell, and then one on solo.
Boom!
And there's their break spot.
it got a huge pop from the people they were fucking screaming
nobody had to do a dive through the ropes
but it's still
can you remember the last time that a guy came from
relatively nowhere in the wrestling landscape
and got as strong of a push
as a as a monster
as Jacob Fatu has
Oh, geez.
Edcar Blue Thomas.
Oh, come on now.
I mean, it may go back to Yokazuna when Yoko wasn't really anybody on a national basis
when he went to the WWF and he was smashed over, but...
But not the same way, because Yoko Zuna, he was just a guy winning matches until he won the Royal Rumble.
And then it was like, oh, wow, they're doing something with Yoko Zuna.
Because he had just come in.
Jacob Attu was immediately inserted into the main event program.
him. Yeah. So, but anyway, he's holding up to it. And they came back from the break and they got heat on
Owens and the multiple asses to the face spot, blah, blah, blah. I got a, again, the phony looking
open-handed punches that all the Samoans are doing now are giving me gas bad. Because it doesn't
need to be that way.
And I think Solo's doing that thing
now where he's obviously
his hand is not even a fist, it's
open and he's
slap punching the guy
and then making a fucking sudden motion
over the guy's head like, wow, I'm following through,
nobody can tell because I was
David Copperfield's sleight of hand with this thing
and it looks like he's having a spasm.
Did you notice that?
I didn't notice it like that, no.
You've been mentioned David Copperfield a lot
Well, you know, a magician that everybody can agree on
Because Chris Angel, where the fuck is he gone?
He's disappeared off the face of the earth
Copperfield's a pervert, he's in lots of trouble
Is he really?
Yeah, I believe so
Well, fuck what I saw him, he was just making...
Oh, he was just in the newspaper actually a couple of weeks ago
He had this amazing apartment, a penthouse at the top of a building in Manhattan
I used to be able to see it from my office at Sony
And someone said that's David Copperfield's place
beautiful place. He abandoned it, flooded it.
Flooded it.
The pictures I saw in the New York Post, it was just destroyed.
Like, he left it in ruins.
Your buddy David Copperfield.
Or what reason?
I don't know. An illusion gone wrong.
An illusion gone wrong.
What's he in trouble for? Is he lost his money or is he assaulted someone in an impure way?
Or what is his deal?
Hold on. Now you're going to make me look.
This is the main event of Smackdown.
and gentlemen. I saw David Copperfield back in the 80s, wonderful performer. Well, a month ago in the New York Times
the headline, David Copperfield vanished. The problem of his penthouse remains.
Another month ago, the magic of David Copperfield couldn't make this lawsuit disappear.
What's the lawsuit for? David Copperfield sued over trashed $7 million Manhattan penthouse.
Yeah, he got
Well, there's got to be some reason why
that a person trashes a $7 million pin house
and then disappears
besides, there's got to be an underlying cause
of this thing, doesn't there?
Well, in May, Rolling Stone, the headline,
magician David Copperfield accused a grooming,
cropping, and drugging women.
Okay, all right, so when I saw him back in the 80s
and he went out in the crowd and did that close-up magic
where he made a Kleenex in his,
hand dance in front of your eyes.
I didn't know what was on to Kleenex.
Son of a bitch.
Okay, that's where you decided to go with it.
You really saw them live?
Yes.
With a dancing Kleenex?
I've got the, yes, I've got the event program.
Where was this?
It might have been in Las Vegas.
It's been 40 years now.
I'd have to fucking go downstairs and look.
All right.
Well, from the Penn State.
house to the outhouse or...
Back to this match.
So they got heat on Owens.
And I don't like the open-handed punches
from the Samoans, for fuck's sake.
And did you see the camera work?
I'm loving the new...
The new camera crew, the new production team.
Owens milked fighting for...
straining for the tag big time.
And they had a camera shot over Orden's shoulder
of him reaching and Owens reaching
and finally he broke loose and made the tag.
and got a big pop.
Imagine that.
When you actually milk something.
But anyway, Randy makes
comeback. Jacob comes in,
takes one power slam
and disappears.
Both heels never feed for the
comeback in the
W.W.E. And I think that was events
also.
And then they go back and forth, boom, boom, boom.
Finally, Owens makes another
comeback and swan solo and
It's a two count.
And here come the Tongas to the ring.
And they distract for solo to rock bottom him and get the two count.
And then they both played Cody's music for three seconds,
and Cody just ran out there and tackled the Tongas.
Why did they need the three seconds of music just to get everybody's attention?
Yeah, for the pop.
But they could see him doing it by the time the music registered.
It's like the music opens the invisible door where the guy gets, all right.
But anyway, Cody tackles the Tongas, and Orton gives Tama an RKO, even though he's not in a match,
and Jacob dives on Cody and Owen's stunner solo.
And when Owens covers solo after the stunner, Cody got rolled into the ring and clipped the referee's
leg. That was done pretty good.
It was. It was perfect. This is
some old Eddie Graham shit.
I'm just, I'm telling you.
It filtered through Watts and through
Dusty or whatever, but it is
and the referee goes
down so Owens gets up pissed
that he can't count the
cover and he's
yelling at Cody like, what the fuck are you doing
and turns around and Jacob
Super Kicks.
Owens twice in the mush and Solo
covers him
and Jacob cuts off Cody one, two, three.
And then Owens is pissed at Cody when the heels roll out
and he's yelling at him and Cody's trying to explain.
It wasn't my fault.
He threw me there.
And Orton becomes the guy getting in the middle to be the peacemaker.
Now, come on, guys, we calm down.
We can talk this over.
Between that hot-headed Owens and the innocent victim of Soikum stance, Cody wrote.
and you understand everything.
It's very easily digestible.
You've talked about what happens if Orton turns on Cody
and if Owens turns on Cody
and what they could be teasing,
what if Roman turns on Cody,
considering the way they're setting these guys up
as having issues about him teaming with Roman?
If right now somebody suggested to Triple H
that they should swerve everybody
because they'll never see it coming
and turn Roman Reigns back heel,
I have a feeling that Triple H
would take the sledgehammer
and cave their fucking skulls in.
I don't know if he could still swing that around.
It's pretty heavy, and I haven't seen him...
I haven't seen...
No, for...
...weeled the hammer in quite a while.
For that suggestion, he'd find the strength.
No, but no, no, no.
Because not only then would you
ruin a lot of Roman Reins' credibility with people,
whether he's heel or babyface, what he says,
but also you would be...
Throwing merchandise money into the Red Sea.
No, no, that's not going to be a thing that happened.
Is it wrong that I think all three of those guys at some point the next couple of years will turn on Cody?
Yes, because I don't think Steen's going to be around to do it.
And I don't think they're going to waste a turn on Cody on Steen when they've got one on Orton.
Orton, or when they've got one with Orton, I should say.
If Steen leaves, do they finish him up with Orton?
Well, I don't know where this is going.
intentionally, they may already be looking in that direction,
or they may just be, well, here we're putting
Owens in something that will kind of help us later on,
but we don't have to feature him, you know, winning any big matches or whatever.
So I don't think Steen's going to be around for the long term.
Orton's going to be one to turn on Cody.
I don't know that Roman Raines is going to be
wrestling at any schedule long enough to turn back heel again.
Because he's going to be a baby face for the next one to two years and after that, why would
you turn a guy that's only going to be wrestling a handful of times a year maybe?
That's just my opinion.
Well, that was your Smackdown.
And if they have a match with Roman and Rock, the Rock is still the heel, remember?
Oh, certainly, yeah.
So what the fuck?
They have a few matches set up already for The Rock without any effort, which is Cody and Roman, two separate matches set up.
What The Rock has time to do and does with other top guys, there are things there you can create a program, but those two are already set up for whenever they want to drop it.
Yeah, and they're not going to turn Roman before they do a number of things.
including, as I said, make $25 billion on merchandise.
All right.
Well, that was, this is your show.
Well, it certainly is, but it's over now, isn't it?
Yes.
And so you promised to people...
Your audio.
Ooh, that's over, too.
I'll unplug this fucking thing again, and we'll see what happens.
It didn't work out well last time.
But you promised the people that we're going to have an organized broadcast on your program in a few days, right?
We'll see.
I mean, there's a lot going on.
We've got to talk about dynamite.
We just talked about dynamite.
We got to talk about another dynamite.
And NXT will be on, I got to set my DVR.
On the UPN-ish channel, the WB.
No, CW.
The CW.
Something should be a country and western channel.
Well, CW McCall had a big hit with Convoy.
Yeah, right.
That's right, Robert Duck.
Come on, rubber duck.
Let's close this thing on.
should be the country and Western Channel.
And apparently
it might do them good because from what I've
seen from statistics on their
network, we'll talk about that when we talk
about NXT on
CW. They've gone from like 1.7
million
viewers in prime time to like
300,000 in the last
10 years or less.
So, if you're going to watch
one name I mention to you, check out
Oba Femi. I want to see what
you think of him. Oba Femi.
Oba Femi.
All righty then.
At least I have no preconceived notion of what he might look like
because I've never seen an oba or a Femmy.
Is he related to Christy Hemmy?
We will talk about all of that minus the hemie on the drive-thru
unless she does something that puts her in the news.
Well, then I think we're safe.
And in parting, folks, we'd like to...
We'd like to just leave now.
Thank you.
Fuck you, bye-bye, everybody.
