Jim Cornette’s Drive-Thru - Drive Thru Special - Commercials Omnibus Volume 5

Episode Date: December 31, 2025

A special for Drive Thru listeners today: By popular demand, Here is Jim Cornette's Commercials Omnibus, Volume 5! Support our sponsors! SHOPIFY: Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com/cornette.  RAYCON: Raycon audio products are up to 20% off this holiday season. Go to https://buyraycon.com/JCEOPEN to save on Raycon audio products sitewide. PRIZEPICKS: Visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/JCE and use code JCE to get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup! RIDGE: Upgrade your wallet today! Get 10% Off @Ridge with code JCE at https://Ridge.com/JCE #ridgepod DRAFTKINGS CASINO: Download the app or go to https://casino.draftkings.com and use code CORNETTE. Play $5 to get 50 spins a day for 10 days on Cash Eruption slots. BRUNT: Get $10 Off at BRUNT with code JCE at https://www.bruntworkwear.com/JCE #bruntpod AURA FRAMES: Exclusive $45 off Carver Mat at https://on.auraframes.com/JCE or use promo code JCE. HELIX: Go to https://helixsleep.com/jce for 27% Off Sitewide exclusive for listeners of the Jim Cornette Experience! FACTOR: Eat smart at https://FactorMeals.com/jce50off and use code JCE50off to get 50% off your first box, plus Free Breakfast for 1 Year. CORNBREAD HEMP: Save 30% on your first order and free shipping on orders over $75! Go to https://cornbreadhemp.com/jce and use code JCE at checkout. SURFSHARK: Go to https://surfshark.com/JCE or use code JCE at checkout to get 4 extra months of Surfshark VPN! Send in your question for the Drive-Thru to: [e-mail]  Follow Jim and Brian on Twitter: @TheJimCornette @GreatBrianLast  Visit Jim's official site at www.JimCornette.com for merch, live dates, commentaries and more!  You can listen to Brian each week on the 6:05 Superpodcast at 605pod.com. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello again, friends. And you are our friends. The great Brian last here. You there, we are back on the bus. Another very popular series that we have done, the latest installment, Jim Cornett's commercials, Volume 5,

the fifth installment in this series, with this man, the leader of the cult of Cornett, Mr. Jim Cornett. You know, that's the thing, Brian, is that we have our fine sponsors and we do these commercials and the people love them because we give them great value and discounts and wonderful products

that we call her attention to. And some people think that they're sometimes amusing. And that's why these series of omnibai have been somewhat popular. But just remember folks that some of these commercial spots are older and therefore our code might not still work. But we encourage you to support our current and brand new. sponsors in 2026. That's right, and we'll have various links up for the sponsors in the show descriptions,

but let's go to it now. Jim Cornett's commercials, the Omnibus Volume 5. What? Honestly, Brian, especially now more than ever, with these programs just lulling you, lulling you into a somnambulistic state, you know what you need, don't you, to be able to watch wrestling on TV in this day and age? What's that? You need the perfect sleep chair.

That's what you need. I could use it right now, apparently. Apparently you could. See, I was going, you need the perfect sleep chair, and then you'd jump in, and it was just my whole timing. But I'll tell you, did I tell you what I did? I haven't told the folks out there, I got the perfect sleep chair. I mentioned that when we've done their spot before, and I said it goes up and it goes down.

It goes up. It cools down. What it was? I got. the perfect sleep chair. I got the perfect sleep chair. I don't know what you're ruining the spot. You should stop.

You're singing and you're snapping. I'm brainstorming their music now for the, because it heats up, it cools down. I got the perfect sleep chair. I got the perfect, that's their new spots. But what I did with my perfect sleep chair that heats up and vibrates and sits up and lays back and reclines and moves in an infinite number of positions, I gave it to my cousin Larry

because he got out of the rehabilitation facility last week and he was at his house and still because you know and this is all in all seriousness they used to say it

on the wrestling programs we're going to have a main event today for all you sick and shut-ins but we have not talked we've just talked to the lazy portion of our audience the part that wants to be not only comfortable but positively

sloth-like as they sit and veg out and watch TV, but this thing is therapeutic. If you have a member of your family that has, you know, issues with being able to get up and down by themselves and they need to move around, but still while they're in a chair, this is perfect, because now instead of the recliner he had

that he had to crank the thing, and the feet would go up and the back would go back, and that was it. now if he wants to put the feet up and lay the back down at the same time or one or the other he can do that it tilts you up into all kinds of positions and it's making it easier for him to change his positions while he's still weak and you know it needs to be supervised when he actually stands up and moves around because if you've been in bed for weeks and weeks it takes a while after an illness like that for your muscles to come back.

So that, according to what he said, made a big difference and is something that we might consider for those of us in our families or social circles that are more than just couch potatoes and actually need to be chairbound for some period of time. Thanks a lot, Mr. Kiljoy. Why don't we talk about all the fun things you could do in the perfect sleep chair?

Well, no, well, it's not. go back, you can go forward, you can, what did you say, you can heat, you can cool, you vibrate, oh yeah, now you're going to heat up, you cool down, I got the perfect sleep chair, I got the perfect sleep chair, I got the perfect sleep chair, but they don't skimp on quality and it's available in fabrics of all kinds, including genuine leather for those of you in the audience who may not only be homebound but incontinent. So it's easier there and they've sold more than 100,000 perfect sleep chairs, the folks at Journey Health and Lifestyle,

so, you know, there's a bunch of people, apparently, are pissing themselves over this thing. And they deliver the chair directly to you so you don't have to worry about packing this thing home from the store. They brought mine right in, lift at the top of the box off, and anything that comes out of a box is over. You know that.

So whether you want the therapeutic heat or the vibration to soothe aching or weakened muscles because of some debilitating condition or you just want to crank back in this thing and stuff twinkies down your neck until you vomit you can do either one you want it's the perfect sleep chair and you can once again make yourself uh uh do yourself a favor in a holiday season not only is it going to be cold for most of you out there well this thing heats up but also when you're watching wrestling,

you don't have to get up and go to bed when you've already gone to sleep, you can just be there. And you don't even need a blanket. It's got heat. So, all you got to do is head over to shopjurney.com. That's shop journey, as in the band, formerly starring Steve Perry, shopjurney.com slash JCE

and use the promo code JCE for $125 off the order of the perfect sleep chair. Is that the largest cash discount that we have ever offered here on the program? You've asked that before, I think so, just because I can't imagine, unless you buy like thousands of dollars worth of stuff using a promo code to get a allotted percentage as a discount. Well, you know, this is a minimum guarantee. See, that's different now. You're talking about the old days the way that people.

paid to wrestlers on the percentage, but this is a Gary, you're getting $125 off of what you order. I would leave WWF for this deal. Well, there you go. Sign the papers now, folks. You don't even need Barry Bloom to represent you. Go to shopjurney.com slash JCE. Use the promo code

JCE at checkout $125 off your order for the perfect sleep chair. And you can do more than sleep in it. We've established that. You can sleep. You can sleep. You eat, you can watch TV, you can bump uglies with your significant other, and if you

get the leather one, well, then you can probably just go wherever you need to go and worry about it later. Shopjurney.com slash JCE.E. Use the promo code JCE at checkout. A wonderful chair

of the perfect sleep chair. That's right. Well, thank you little Sir ECHO. I really like that chair. I want to make sure that people know that we're really endorsing it. When nobody was questioning you. Well, you would your whole downbeat, oh, if you're an invalid and you have no legs. Well, I was, I was suggesting other people.

He's got legs. He's got legs. He knows how to use them. If your life isn't bad enough, I'll sing. Yeah, he knows how to use his lap. Okay. Well, perfect sleep chair. And she knows how to use hers, too.

Who? She, that she's got legs. Yes. All right. Whether you're able-bodied or feeble-minded or whatever you are, you can get something out of the perfect sleep chair. That's right. It's for everybody.

It's for everybody. It doesn't discriminate, Brian, over race or creed or color. What is a creed? Hold on. Let me look at it. I guess perfection is really what it implies that it's perfect for everyone. That's why they named it. It's perfect.

And it's for everyone. Because everyone sleeps, right? Everybody sleeps. Everybody poops. Everybody sleeps. These are common things. Well, it's perfect for everybody then. I still can't find creed.

Let's see, what exactly is that? Creed, a formal statement of religious belief. All right then. Yeah, we don't discriminate at the perfect sleep chair. Against any race, creed, or color. They discriminate against people pretending they work there. You don't work there. Well, I feel like I'm one of them because I was at one with one of their chairs for

about a week till I gave it to my needy cousin. I feel like I'm... Now he's needy. Now he's needy. He didn't say he was needing to be a chair. No, he's got plenty of money, but he didn't have a goddamn good chair. Now he's got a goddamn good chair. See, sometimes rich people that can afford anything they want still would not know that this thing was a thing that was available until somebody else gives them that thing. So give me dad, give me dad, give me that thing. Because it's the best.

Or, you know, rich cousin could just use the problem. code. What's that one more time, Jim? JCE at shopjurney.com slash JCE. Well, you know, you know what I'm always excited for, Brian? Not the wrestling programs on a monthly basis, but when I get my box of awesome in the mail, that's when I get excited, don't you? I, in fact, do, and I use my previous month's knife, because I've gotten a few lately, to open the new box and see all the new awesome.

this. And did you get another knife or have you branched out into any, is there something we need to know about you? Should there be a red flag law up in New Jersey? About you and these knives? I'm not doing anything with them. Are you throwing them at Suzanne while she's standing in front of a wall? No, she's good with a knife. I wouldn't mess with her. Well, then you practice with the kids. No, they're good with knives too. I wouldn't mess with them. Well, in that case, then, you're just taking these things and you're just flinging them at the wall for no reason. I don't fling, I'm not talking about flinging knives, although we can fling a great box of awesome to all the listeners that may potentially have a knife or other fine, awesome-like products.

Now, wait a minute, folks, ladies and gentlemen, I want to tell you that is not what's going to happen. They're not going to throw boxes at you containing sharp implements. No, that's not what I'm saying. They're going to deliver them right to your front door via the U.S. Postal Service or whatever fine courier they decide to use. Or if you leave your front window open, they'll just sidearm it, just pitch it right in that thing.

And in that case, if you see it come and duck, especially if it's going end over end. It will not be delivered that way, and they in that case would be the courier. And if that does happen, please complain to the courier that has nothing to do with bespoke post and the box of awesome, which you will love, and gets delivered once a month,

right to you, filled with awesomeness, upon awesomeness and just more and more and more awesomeness in a box. Awesomeness in a box, ladies and, by the way, what's the Courier Journal ever done to you? It's a fine paper. Don't complain about the courier. Folks, no matter where your adventures are taking you this fall, our friends at Bespoke Post has a box of awesome or have a box of awesome to make it just that. An adventurous and awesome fall.

Because they're filled with carefully chosen gear as we've talked about from the best small businesses and brands around the world. Not just this country, but the world. I'm telling, they found the smallest business on the country of Iceland and there's stuff coming from that business in your box of awesome if you pick the right one. Smallest business in the world.

This guy actually had both of his legs amputated. And he works for himself. So he's not even a one-man business. This is not even a one-man story. I don't know where you concocted this. And this is nothing of a box of awesome. third's there. He's the smallest business in the world. He works for himself out of his house and he's got no legs. But folks, there's all kinds of small businesses, some with four to six legs. Is it a

regular size house? It's a little tiny house. You've seen those on the on the television program, the little tiny house. He pulls his bed out from under the stove in the kitchen. I've seen that on the television program, as you said. Yes, it pulls right out. Anyway, and the box of awesome helps him because it's not too big, so it'll go at his tiny house, and folks, it'll go in yours. And once you open it, that's when everything that's in the box of awesome springs out at you with pleasure and vibrancy. For the record, nothing will be springing out of the listeners. Well, if you have your wife or husband or significant other, when you open it, throw it up in your face,

all the shit will spring out at you. Let's not do that, and let's not even... Well, there might be knives. That's right. Yeah, but besides knives, they've got barbers, barbecue rub. Yeah, who wants that on their face? The Great American Spice Company in Rockford, Michigan,

you remember my brown, I mean my bourbon nosing kit where you can identify the various odors and not odors, but the sense and the ingredients of bourbon or if it stinks, you need to know that too. Nose your bourbon is what that one, it's in the swirl package. Swirl strickland. There's all, yes, swirl strickland.

There's also hot sauces. There's cocktail smokers. And boy, it's hard to get that liquid into that small little pipe. But there's an amazing plethora and variety, the weekender bag with the quality leather straps and the metal hardware that you can carry various things that you might use over the course of a weekend, depending on what your weekends are like.

And just so much more. And you just, you go to boxof awesome.com. and you take the quiz of what you're interested in. They don't want to send you just things you're not interested in because, well, that just wouldn't be awesome. They want to know what you want, and they'll send you things that pertain to those things that you want. And each box is valued at around $70,

but you pay only a fraction of that price because they're patronizing the small businesses. They're going to these mom-and-pop stores, small up-and-coming brands, and they're saying, look here, you ain't nobody, it's worth something. You better sell us what you're making, and you better sell it to us cheap. Because we're going to turn around and sell it to our customers, and we want to save them money. So they strong arm these innocent...

No, no, they have a wonderful working... You're practically giving these products away so they can pass the savings on to you. Well, that part is true. They pass the savings off to you, the listener. Well, who do you think they're pulling... Whose asses the savings coming out of? They're coming out of mom and pops. This is a cooperative effort between the small business and Box of Awesome to deliver

awesomeness. Box of Awesome comes in there and they're like, you know, it's a nice business you got there. Be ashamed if something happened to it. I like how they keep sending me better boxes of Awesome than you, just like, because I'm more awesome than you. Well, I just answered the question's wrong. But nevertheless, so then when they take this shit from Mom and Pop and Leave them Broken and busted and disgusted in an alleyway somewhere, they will give them the advertising. So that's how these small businesses prosper.

A broken leg or arm here or there is nothing compared to the publicity that they're getting from having their products placed in the boxes of Awesome. None of this is true, ladies and gentlemen. None of it, not a word of it? None of it is true. What do you mean even Box of Awesome.com enter the code JCE? That's true. 20% off your first monthly box?

20% off the first box at boxofawesome.com enter code JCE.E. That's factual, is it not? That is indeed factual, but these fantasies of thug life that you're presenting to the audience are indeed fabrications of your mind. I have no recollection of any of those events. Folks again, go to boxofawson.com, use the code JCE, get 20% off your first box of whatever awesomeness in whatever genre of awesomosity that you pick

when you take that slight little quiz there and then they start sending you stuff that you're going to love forevermore and hug and squeeze and call these things George because that's, you're going to form a bond with these small business items and potentially also get stabbed by one of them

if they throw it in your open front window. They won't be doing that and you won't be getting hurt because that won't be happening but you will be receiving at your doorstep the box of awesome or in your mailbox or your P.O. box Safely and securely delivered. Box of awesome.

A box of box and a box and a box. And you will not get injured. Just don't let the people know that you like hand grenades. When you fill out. Again, again, no. There will be no. No. No.

No. No. You can see some of the fine products on their website. What would you get? What would you get if you took the, quiz and you said I like hand grenades and nuclear fission material and uranium what would you get in your boxes of awesome you get the FBI up your ass that's what you get and you deserve it too well there you go get your life together sicko but if you have your life together if you have your life

together and you want some awesome this brought right to you courtesy of your friends here at the jim cornet experience his show for the record what's that promo code one more time jim JCE for Box of Awesome.com, 20% off. We can't do this all day. I'm not ready to be brought in yet, Brian. All right, well, that's good to hear. And I think that, Jim, this past week's collision was one of those rare episodes where

you would probably start in the sleep position on the perfect sleep chair and end in the TV position or sitting upright in the perfect sleep chair to watch the Drake. of AEW. Well, you know, I remember when you used to actually try to think about this for a second and make some semblance of sense and your words were put together in the manner in which

the English language deserved to be treated instead of this tortured syntax. When was that? Verbal diarrhea to try to get to a topic that's so easy. It's so easy to talk about. Everybody wants to be comfortable. and everybody has trouble getting exactly in the right position to be comfortable, whether they're sleeping or watching TV or whatever. That's the problem, but everybody's got.

Now, we cannot help you if you've got your drawers tucked up between the boys too tight, and that's what's ailing you. However, if it's just you can't get in the right position because you've got a lumpy surface that you're on, or it won't go into right shape to fit your, you know, maybe your bucket seat, is not big enough for your bucket or whatever the case. The perfect sleep chair from shopjurney.com handles that quite well because they can get in any combination of positions. It's an infinite number when you take into consideration the back moving

and the footrest moving and the seat moving up and the down and the whole thing straightening out flat or stand it almost up straight. and then the move in and down again and up and down and up to down. There's an infinite number of positions. A virtual arena experience. Yes. And I mean, and boy, when it tilts you sideways and then you go up like the roller coaster and then when it does the loop-de-loop, actually, is there a loop-de-loop setting, Brian?

In the arena? What arena has a loop-de-loop? What are you talking about? In the perfect sleep chair. They don't have a loop. That would be so dangerous and so, no, they do not have that. Well, and don't give one of these for your mother-in-law, Because the accident, well, the accident probably wouldn't be believable unless it has a loop-de-loop set.

Go the other way. That's where you can really find the loophole in that. Get one for your mother-in-law so she could tell her daughter how much she loves you. I was thinking if it had a loop-de-loop and you could get it and she hit the button. If she fell on her head, then, you know, plausible deniability, you weren't even there. But nevertheless. Have you ever been on one? A loop-to-loop?

A roller coaster? Oh, I don't go upside down. You've never been upside down? No, I don't. Well, sometimes against my will. but I don't purposely put myself in a position where I'm going to be hurled upside down. Other than your snappy pappy behavior, have you ever been upside down on a ride? No, that's what I'm saying to you.

Never. Wow. Except in the course of wrestling and or vehicular accidents and or a few skirmishes, I have been upside down but against my will, but I would never purposely get on a conveyance or a vehicle or a compartment or holder of anything that would turn me upside down on purpose. You came to this conclusion in life or even as a little kid you were like, I can't do this.

No, I wasn't an upside down kid when I was a kid either. No, that didn't make sense to me. But now the tilt a whirl, I love that tilt because as long as I'm right side up, I'll spin around in circles and go fast, but it's just it can't be... What about the gravitron? Well, now that thing, I mean, I see what they're going for there,

but it made me more uncomfortable than anything else and hurt my little gonads when I was plastered up against that wall. When I was a kid at the Gravitron of Adventureland, the Long Island, some kid threw up, and it just went right out, right back into his own face. Well, see, those kind of things, and especially on roller coasters, too, those kind of things can happen. And I don't want people just projectile vomiting,

especially if they're in front of me on a situation like that. no one wants that, but Jim, I think what I want to say is that the great thing about the perfect sleep chair is there's no loop to loop. Oh, we're still talking about that. No loop to loop. So you will be safe and you will be comfortable and you will be asleep and awake and enjoying your day in a comfortable perfect chair. You'll be, your right side can sleep while your left side is watching television. And also, if you hit the Gravitron button, it'll suck you right into the fucking lining of this thing. You'll never be able to get it. It'll be like you weigh a thousand. It'll be like you weigh a thousand pounds your head is getting very sleepy. It is a hokey-pokey of comfort.

Okay, well, I'll take the hokey and you get the pokey. But nevertheless, if you're in the perfect sleep chair and you feel something poking you anywhere, that's an optional attachment that's going to cost extra. Nope, not your life-for-like. Maybe from some unlicensed third-party vendor, but not from perfect sleep chair. Some kind of bootleg, oh, that was the perfect sex chair. I'm sorry. confused the advertising. And you know what? You made fun of me. Unbelievable. Yes, I did. I'm sure. You did? What? I don't know when, but I'm sure I did. Well, I'm trying to tell you, you made fun of me last week when I tried to mention that I'd given the perfect sleep chair to my cousin Larry when he got out of the rehabilitation facility and was in the hospital and everything was able to

come home. And he's been doing his physical therapy, but the chair still helped him be able to move around and even stand up a little bit, get him started there and he can sleep in it or he can move around and get his circulation going and it vibrates and it heats up and cools down because he's got the perfect sleep chair, he's got the perfect sleep chair, he's got the perfect sleep chair, and you made fun of me for bringing the jocularity and hilarity of our spot down because I was talking about a real-life individual with mobilization problems. He's not directly as completely mobile as he should

be and the chair is helping him. There's a lot of the sick and the shut-ins out there that deserve a main event on television and deserve the perfect sleep chair not only for a lazy type of comfort for your own self and your own self-indulgent pleasures and whims.

You decadent people out there, you cretans, you're living a life of debauchery and you want to be perfectly comfortable in a perfect sleep chair. Or, for the needy and the and the and the and the and the and the and the people who really need something like this it's it's therapeutic heat and and and help with their if their muscles can't do the job of moving the chair on it it can move on its own and everyone in between the needy

and the uh whatever the first option was the well the first option is just you slugs out there and you decadent debauched individuals that all you cares your own pleasures and carnal desires and this perfect sleep chair is good for carnality also if you want to because it'll hold two people if you do it right and they don't squimp on quip skimp squimp they don't squimp or skimp they are a fine company they don't skimp on quality or squimp on it either and it's available in several fabrics

including genuine leather I'm checking to see if they got one for Harley made out of a puppy pad material there fabric and they deliver the chair right to you not the puppy pads but the chair so you don't need to worry about just packing his thing home from the store

or whatever it's going to show upright and some fine fine individuals are going to unbox it and bring it right in the one that when they brought mine in there they took the top of the box off there was a fucking guy still sleeping in a chair no there wasn't don't even choke about that that's not deliver their chair, there'll be no one in your chair, it'll be fresh for you to die in on your

own. To do what? Or I mean, to enjoy. Enjoy, yes. All right. He was asleep, not dead. I thought he said he was dead. He was dead. No, I said he was asleep. He was still sleeping in it. You see. Alive or dead, you can call to life in this chair. But they have a special, they have a special function if you go on their website shop journey.com shop and the group journey with Steve Perry shop journey.com and they got a special function you can register your chair so that if anybody else but you gets in it they will instantly be injected with poison no they will be killed on the

spot no and then you can dispose of them later on if it sounds like a comic book folks it's because that's not real that will not be offered that will not be an option. No that's a goddamn Ian Fleming novel. You could see Gert Frobe sitting down in that thing and the needle coming out and poop, and then he'd realize, Bon, he's got me.

Newman. But anyway, folks, once again, the best chair money can buy... That's right. The best chair that sickness can help... Perfection. ...can help sickness. Perfection.

I'm sorry, what? Perfection. Perfection. No, I thought you said infection. No, if you have an infection, it's a good chair to sit in too because it'll tilt you upward where you can hawk that stuff out

and spitting your spatoon sputoon not included but again folks go to shopjurney.com slash jCE right now and use the promo code june oh no j c e

no the promo code jcee spittoon is the next spot you're going to get $125 off your order is what's going to happen to you $125 off the perfect sleep chair to sleep or be ill in whichever one or watch TV, watch TV, have sex, be ill and sleep. Or just sit and have a regular sit down. Just sit quietly. Sit quietly and have a regular sit down.

That's right. And then get up and walk away again. Just like regular people do. I will sit down and now I will get up in a chair. Bring the commasutra over and prop it up on the coffee table and try this bad boy out. Shopjurney.com slash JCE. Use the promo code JCE at checkout $125 off the best chair to do anything in. That's right.

Once again, the perfect sleep chair, the perfect way to sit back and enjoy wrestling on a Wednesday or any other night. But Jim, let's keep. Or just if you're paralyzed and can't move at all. At least you could, you know, you could be in an incumbent. and have the movement done for you. That was certainly a big segment and a big show, and we could talk about a big box of awesome that would be better than this big show

on this big network that we are watching. Well, you know, anything that comes out of a box is over, Brian. That's what somebody once said, who was a very wise, wise man. And if you would like to get over with your family folks or your friends or your significant other or people in your social circle or the periphery of the space that you occupy as part of your daily life, that's everybody. Everybody loves a Box of Awesome from Box of Awesome.com and bespoke post,

and that's why you need to be jumping on to this thing, because we've talked about so many of the wonderful knick-knacks and patty wax that they will send you pertaining to some of your biggest interests in life, whether it's, whether you're a drunken slob and like cocktails all day long, or you like to grow things in the ground, or you like to eat food, carnivorous food, and you need spices and seasonings that can be rubbed onto roadkill and things of that nature. What are you talking about? Well, they got everything. That's what I'm telling you.

You can cut people. You got... No, no, you cannot. That is not allowed. and that is not encouraged or endorsed? You can cut people right out of your life with some of these things and not give them to them or you can bring other people a camping gear essentials.

Let's say you want to take somebody you know out in the woods and pitch a tent and cook in the wild and eat squirrels. They've got camping gear essentials. Cocktail upgrades. Let's say you want to get sloshed sometime. You want to just get gassed. Well, they've got a... A bourbon nosing kit that I received where you can just sniff all of the various things that are in the bourbon.

And it came with the organic sourdough flatbread bites. That was a big hit in the house here. Or the barbecue sauces and rubs and seasonings. That's where I was talking about, you know, rubbing down the meat. Let's say you go out with the camping gear essentials and you take the custom-made knives and you slay some of the woodland creatures and bring a bear back to barbecue. You got to dry rub that bear, don't you? I don't even know where to start or...

Do you eat bear bear without any seasoning or dry rub? I don't recall the last time or any time I've eaten bear. I couldn't bear it. Have you eaten bear? Well, barely. But I'm telling you, no matter what you're interested in, all you do is you go to boxofawsome.com, And you take the quiz and you tell them the things you're interested in, the things you collect,

the things that you might traffic in, buy and sell, importing, exporting, whatever the case, things that you want in your home. And then they will send you a box every month across a ton of different categories, specifically applying to your interest, likes, and romantic fantasies. Each box is valued at around $70, but you only pay a fraction of that price. If they catch you, you may get in trouble, but you'll probably be able to get away with this for a little while. And you're supporting the small businesses. 90% of everything that comes in your box of awesome is from a small up-and-coming mom-and-pop brand or brother and sister brand or niece and nephew brand or animal brand.

Just family. We cover all of that. Or close friends. And we don't know what you're doing behind closed doors, even if you're related. As long as you don't tell us at the deep. No, no, no. No, we care and don't do anything that is wrong and only do what is right with right people. And that's what we're talking about here.

We're talking about. Small brands is what I was talking about. Well, we want to help the small brands with the right people who produce the right products for a good audience. Hey, who are you to judge these people? Let's say, and they didn't know they were cousins. But nevertheless, it's all small businesses that are being helped by the folks at spoke posts that get these things and then they pass the savings on to you they strong arm them right out of the hands of the small businesses mom and pop no and they and they they pay them but they get

a lot of exposure mom and pop do and they work hand in hand with mom and pop and it is a wonderful mutually beneficial partnership mom and pop's hands are sometimes tied behind their back in a situation like no they're not but never though well you don't know what mom wants to do to pop or vice versa. It's their lives. Whatever they do is their own business. That's C. I got you to admit it. But everything, folks, that comes in your box of awesome is going to be a treat that you will

enjoy and think about forever. And all you got to do right now to get 20% off of your first monthly box is go to boxofof awesome.com and enter the code JCE at checkout 20% off your first box box of awesome.com. dot com. The code is JCE 20% how can you beat that's that is literally two tenths off right there

off the top. Four-fifths as a no not four-fifths but four wait a minute it's it's hold on now. 20% is one-fifth or if the eight W

the accountant Jim Cornett it's four-twent. It's four-twenties off. Four-twenties. It's always four-twenty somewhere. but one more time, what's that promo code, Jim? Boxofawsome.com. Enter the code JCE at checkout for your box of small mothers and fathers, life savings.

Awesome products. That they've trusted somebody else with and they've sold them out from under them. Awesome products. I'm going to open my next one on the air when they send it to me. So send it to me. That's true. I've been meaning for you to do that because we need to hear about this. But none of that happened on SmackDown.

No, we had more fun with table talk this week than we did with SmackDown. Well, you know, and that's the thing is, table talk, it's talk, and it's about tables. But you can talk about anything you want to talk about, folks. As long as you're listening to something you enjoy, what difference does it make what the subject is? That's right. That's right. That's why you love to listen to these programs, because we give you all kinds of topics. That's right.

kinds of subjects. And the best way in the whole wide world to listen to one of these programs is on our friends at Raycon's wireless earbuds. And have you heard about this? The early Black Friday sale going on now, Brian. I did not. Early Black, is it gray? You heard about this.

I told you about it. Fucking three days ago. We did the last program. Oh, was that you? But you don't listen to me anymore. You never listen. Folks, it's up to 50% off at the early Black Friday sale, which is a shade of gray. Code name Cobra, right?

Code name Cobra. You don't have to worry about being trampled like cattle. You don't have to worry about being mutilated like cattle. You don't have to worry about being milked like cattle. Because all you've got to do is in the privacy of, well, there's a lot of things happen to cattle these days. Apparently. In the privacy of your own home, you can go to buy Raycon.com. and you can fill out your Christmas list for yourself or for your significant other,

for your loved ones, family members, anybody that wants to hear voices or even potentially music in their own head. You can program people's minds, ladies and gentlemen, with the Raycon everyday wireless earbuds. No, repetition is the key. You can't program their minds. You can program some fine tunes that will be played and some snappy talk. If you record your voice saying,

want you to want me, the way that I want you, the way that it could be, baby, I'd love you to want me. And they'd just hear it over and over? I don't know if they hear you doing that. They're going to think anything other than, how do I get these out of my ear? Baby, I'd love you to want me, the way that I want you, the way that it could be, baby, I'd love you to want me. See, if you just hear that over and over, it trains these people. Stick these earbuds in a girl you want to get with, stick them in her ears while she's asleep at night. If you have to crawl in the wind and do what you got to do, and then let her hear that over and over while she's asleep, George is the guy, George is the guy, I want to blow George.

Shit like that, and you will be able to train people to your bidding. I don't think we should be teaching or preaching to people that they should be using this for some level of hypnosis that they could somehow just do to people. What, you suggest, sneak into someone's house? Train people, just as subliminal. I didn't say sneak into houses and crawl into window. Now, there's a difference. Are you saying you could train people or that the train people are going to be sneaking into your house?

No, well, you can train people to sneak into houses on behalf of you for other people. Or you can't just train people to do your bidding. Or you could do perfectly, perfect, I can't even talk. You could do perfectly legal things like listen to music and snappy talk. Well, yes, like that, Raycon is a great company. It's multiple companies now. They launched Racon Home and Racon Power Tech. They've got that magic 180 cable that charges all the IOs and the micro-usbs and the type Cs.

USBs. And they've got the faucet filter that ultra-filters the water in your tap against chlorine and heavy metal. That's not what it does. It has nothing to do with water filtration or water softening. The faucet filter ultra-filters the water, and that's the faucet filter that comes from Racon home. And it ultra-filters the water in your tap against chlorine and heavy metal. That's exactly what it says. What it's got against Black Sabbath and Led Zeppelin and other groups, I have no idea,

but it's going to filter that stuff out. Because you're using this water to wash your face and brush your teeth. It really does say that. This is a real thing you're talking about. What of what you think I'd lie? You just make up all sorts of shit. I never know what you're saying on these things. I didn't say the earbuds would filter the water.

You can't do that. I'll tell you right now, don't try to filter your water with the ears. because all you'll get is soggy earlobes. But folks, whatever you want, you want to listen to fine earbuds, you want to drink clean water, you want to charge up various shit you can plug into the Magic 180 cable with. They've got all kinds of things to make your life easier over at Buy Raycon, B-U-Y, R-A-C-O-N, buy Raycon.com. And right now with the early Black Friday sale, which is getting a darker gray as we speak,

and is headed toward full blackout potential, it's going on right now, up to 50% off. Up to 50% off. There's all kinds of different discounts. There's 20%, there's 30, 40, even 50% on these various products. You've got to jump in now. Great gifts.

That's right. Stocking stuffers. I'll tell you what, you take a pair of these earbuds, and you stick them in a woman stocking, boy it's only going to take her a second to notice that they're there and she's going to jump and turn around and say what the fuck did you just shoving my crotch and then she'll see their raccon wireless airwoods in the stockings and she'll pull them out no and she'll say well these go in my ears but thank you i don't i don't think any of that is the way that would go down of any of that

preposterous scenario actually happened but that depends on the woman every idea you have is like out of a movie from the 80s, from the early 80s, the very early 80s. Well, it's almost the late 70s. It's so early. But you can do all these things, folks, with the fine products that you find at byraycon.com slash jCE is how you're going to get that discount, by the way. Use that slash JCE. 20 to 50% off by raycon.com slash JCE, get 20 to 50% off the Racon products,

many things that you can shove in a woman's undergarments for Christmas this year. No, you could put it where you put your gifts. Where the sun don't shine. But that's a lousy way to look at it. Instead, shove it in mom's stocking. Once again, what's that promo code, Jim? Slash JCE. Does that count as a promo code or is that a slash?

Well, buy raycon.com. You need to get it. Buyraycon. Well, that's not a promo code. That's a website. Buy Raycon.com is the website. Slash JCE is how you get the money off, and it's up to you to pick what you want to shove into mom's undergarments.

Maybe we'll have a little bit more classic audio, we'll see, but before we go too much further, if only there was a network that had a lot of this stuff that was only available overseas that we had to use a link to get access to to see this amazing hidden footage. Hitting, hitting, hitting footage? The hitting footage, the footage of people hitting other people. This amazing...

hidden foot. I just give it up. You know, if there was just a way that we could see all the shit that we want to see without telling people what we were seeing, that sums things up. Folks, you're just, if you go online without a VPN,

then it's just like you're standing stark naked in the middle of your living room window with Aunt Fannie and Uncle Feltcher across the street staring at your little dingling. That's what you're doing. might as well call the cops on you for exposing yourself to the world if you don't have our friends at ExpressVPN

keeping you covered. Because the internet service providers can see every single website you visit. And as a result of that, they can sell that information, potentially to the highest bidder. I'm pretty sure that this evidence is admissible in court. So just think of how much

your wife would pay for information like this. And they will use this data to target you. You're going to have a big sniper rifle scope right between your eyes and the ISPs. Boom goes the dynamite. Your life is over. They have consigned you to Devil's Island somewhere because they have exposed you to the world as being a person that goes to the nether reaches of the internet. That's for most of you. No, not exactly how it works for any of you. Oh, that's a, yeah. People are going to their netheres and they're reaching them. But Express VPN can cover you up because I'll tell you what, they can cover all the goods and services that you've got because they will make people think that you are somewhere far

the fuck away from where you're at. And then you can just do anything with impunity. You can go. No. You want to go, do what you want to do. You can move other people's money around the goddamn world No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, just stop. Whatever you're thinking, stop, just stop. Well, just the smaller country. And think about, think about whatever it is that makes you happy, dead babies or whatever

it is that makes you happy. Think about that right now. And let's talk about ExpressVPN being used for fine, yes, legal reasons, like accessing fine programs from the UK, like the Great Selwyn-D. Use ExpressVPN to hack into the defense systems of some smaller countries around the world. It's their fault. No. And they shouldn't hold it against you.

It is certainly nothing that Jim is encouraging, and we don't encourage it. We encourage you to leave small countries alone. We. Isn't that right, Jim? Yes. Leave those poor little countries alone, you big bullies. We encourage you to have courage, though, when you use ExpressVPN. because they can't see your online activity then.

Your identity is anonymized, anonymously anonymity, anonymized by a secure VPN server. This VPN server, he's a secure son of a gun. He's comfortable in his own skin. He comes out. He's got a towel over his arm. He's wearing a black tuxedo. And he says, hi, I'll be your VPN server.

And he's a secure son. And he's going to protect you and he's going to encrypt your data. and just make sure that you zip your pants up afterwards. There's no actual physical server that's a human being. There's a physical server. It's just a real server. It's not a human being serving you cocktails or whatever it is you're fantasizing about over there. Snappy pappy.

We had a server the other night when we had dinner, but it's easy to use ExpressVPN. You fire up the app. Once you be careful, wear gloves, because it will get hot when you set fire to it. but after you fire up the app you click one button and then bang bang bang bang in front of your eyes things start changing neon signs start going on and off flashing lights there will be some helicopters

and pretty soon you're all covered up and you can access programs from around the world like the wwee network that they've still got over in in the other countries that they like better than us we got to watch the cock and actually you can get into some cock also with the express VPN because well they've got different peacocks for different parts of the world right so you can just you can adjust your cock however you see fit for what you'd like to see on it I don't know from Bangor to Bangkok you can use ExpressVPN to access all sorts of stuff

you can spend more than one night in Bangkok now because they won't know where you are So again, don't let the ISPs win and don't stand in front of your picture window with Willie hanging out for the world to see. Use ExpressVPN and secure your online activities. Go right now, expressvpn.com slash JCE. Right now, expressvpn.com slash JCE, you're going to get an extra three months free

of this protection we're talking about. And as a matter of fact, Stacey got us the year's subscription to ExpressVPN, renewed it, actually, I should say, the other day, and changed her location. Fuck, it's never been quieter around here. I've seen her in four or five days. What? She changed her location. Where is she, Jim?

I don't know. Jim. Jim. Where is she, Jim? ExpressVPN. Where is she? com slash JCE. If you want to change your location, they'll know.

not be able to figure out where you are, no matter what they do. I don't know who they are, but again, if you want to access fine programming that may not be available here in the States, like, for instance, the great sewing bee out of England, ExpressVPN is the place you should go, or the people you should see, check them out. Jim, what's the promo code? I said it before slash JCE for an extra three months free of protection. You will not get pregnant, you'll be fully protected. from your online activities.

You know, online insemination is a trend that's sweeping the country now. If you don't use protection. Well, your data will be protected, and there'll be no pregnancy in your data being sold, whatever we're saying, ExpressVPN. You know, I didn't think much of SmackDown at all. I mean, I like Escobar a lot as a heel. I'll just say that.

I've enjoyed Escobar stuff the last few weeks. when he yells and he gets angry, you kind of believe him. And the girl stuff was telling the story of Becky and Charlotte leading into war games. Not exactly something exciting me right now, but those fans there seemed lukewarm about it. What's that? No, no, everyone there is into their stuff, but, you know, it was another episode of Smackdown. I don't even remember the finish of the match or anything. I don't even know if I watched a match, to be honest with it.

you. That's because it's just, what it is, Brian, is they gave us a bunch of parsley. They gave us a bunch of of garnish. They didn't give us anything to chew on, to sink our teeth into. They didn't give us the meat of the matter.

They were giving us the big stars, the Roman Rainses, the L.A. Knights, the beef. They were given us parsley, and Lord knows you can't make a meal out of parsley, but I'll tell you what, Brian. You want to know where you can get some beef?

You want to know where you can get a big slab of meat shoved right in front of you? I'll tell you where's sitting right at your own kitchen or dining room table or potentially even outside, weather permitting, at your barbecue. And that's from our friends at Omaha Steaks are going to send you a box of goddamn cattle byproduct and various types of proteins and meats from animals that once roamed the earth. and now are there merely to feed and nourish you and your family, and they're going to save you money doing it. Have you heard about the 50% off deal?

No, what's that, Jim? Well, I'll tell you, I know you've heard about it because you've already taken advantage of it, because there's jubilation running roughshod at last manner when the Omaha Steaks box comes in. You've talked to be out of the air. So? What's your point?

I'm saying you know what it is because you've already taken advantage of it but our friends out there in podcast land can as well or canned as well you can possibly can the stakes and save them for even longer Oh I thought you're talking about our listener Candy I didn't know where you were going with this.

Well candy you know don't talk about candy Right now go to Omaha Steaks.com She's changed She went through a program She's not the same person she used to be go to omaha steaks.com right now folks and save 50% offsidewide that's half off my god that's as half is as big a piece of it as the other half is left over so you're you're equal there and when you use the promo code jcee at omahostakes.com you're going to get an additional

$30 off your order on top of the 50% offside wide I mean it's They're almost, they're doing everything but herding the cattle and trooping it right down the road to your front yard. Well, beyond the beef and the meat and everything, I have to say for Thanksgiving, we use some of their, because they sent it to us the potato scallops and then also the apple tartlets. Yeah, the caramel apple tartlets, I'll, if you're going to put their name in your mouth. They added some ice cream to it. It was delicious. The cheesy scallop potato sides. Oh, my gosh.

Also, the butcher's cut filet mignon's. the mouth-watering burgers, the gourmet jumbo Franks, these things are John Holmes-like. I'm telling you, the possibilities are endless with our friends at Omaha Steaks.com. That's right. And right now. Endless.

They're ready to ship your order right away. So shop early and beat the shipping rush. And use that promo code JCE. Remember, it's half off, 50% off sitewide, plus another $30 off your order. with the promo code JCE for the boxes of these meats and sides and things that you're going to chew on all winter long and the best part is they're practically paying you to take it

I mean after the health department came in and made that visit they want to clear everything out no I'm merely kid I Josh about our fine friends at Omaha Steaks they are the world's best beef naturally aged for the ultimate in tenderness, juiciness, and flavor, and five generations of family-owned expertise

have gone into this uncompromising quality. Five generations of the Omaha family. They're originally from Parsipany, New Jersey. No, no, they're from Omaha, and the family has a different name. Oh, I thought the family's name was Omaha. They can't be. No way.

Well, in that case, and then whoever's making this meat, folks, You're going to like it. Don't ask too many questions. Every steak and every entree is flash-frozen, vacuum-sealed, and it comes to you in a styrofoam cooler with the dry ice. And I'm telling you what, don't grab a hold of that dry ice with your bare hands either. No, but the kids like it when you throw it in the sink and turn a faucet on.

Well, the kids like it when you throw it at them, too. You can play like snowmoblights with this stuff. No, you can't. No, you certainly cannot. Either party would be injured by that. Just put some goggles on them. They'll be fine. Ladies and gentlemen, don't play with the dry ice.

Well, and stay away from the brown acid, too. But folks, the Omaha steaks, they're guaranteed to put a smile on your face when you send them a gourmet gift. So right now, for the holidays, everybody needs food, everybody needs meat, everybody needs sustenance, calories, energy, caloric intake to put through your intestinesals and make them right as rain. And it tastes good, too. your tongue will slap your brains out. Omaha steaks.com. The code is JCE at checkout for an extra $30 off the 50% off site wide.

A minimum order may be required, but my God, how cheap are you? At prices like this, you ought to have to buy the whole goddamn bison. So if you want some meat you can trust right now, a slab of it, slapped you in a face with it, delivered right to your door, Omaha Steaks. that's right what's that is certainly right promo code is jCE at checkout at checkout well no don't just go in screaming jcee they won't know what the fuck you're talking about you got to shop first for heaven's sake well i guess we got through with that didn't we yeah you don't have to throw away the you don't have to be so aggressive with the uh paper you know i was i was trying to before

we go any further with the uh the wrestling well i think we we've ended with the wrestling and now we're going to go to Saturday night live next folks, but this is going to be a real rip snorter. We're going to hear from the other side of this war. But I was going to tell the people before we had to travel, for reasons best left unsaid, about the great box that I got in the mail today here, or not today, but here recently now, because we've traveled in time. So it was recently.

Did I tell you about my box of awesome that came? Before we travel through time, though, have not. Well, now I mean anytime. When I was speaking to you off the air, sometimes I do that. Well, no, you haven't. I mean, in the past, you told me about present boxes that you had received, but you didn't tell me about future boxes you expected to receive, and here we are in the future, and I don't know about the past box you recently received. What are you fucking talking about? Did I tell you, I got the chill, the chill, cooler from the fine folks at W-R-E-N in my box of awesome, most recently here. You did. You. You did. You.

You said you got the chilled and it's multiplying. Well, I got chills. They're multiplying. Get it to myself. And I'm losing control because this cooler their supplying is not electrifying. I don't advise you to fill this cooler with liquid and then stick your feet in it and then stick your finger in a light socket or anything. So we don't want you to be electrocuted with it.

but it's almost big enough to take a swim in. Here's the deal on this thing. No, it is not just, it's not styrofoam. And it's not like a cooler, a hard plastic cooler that you would see or you would be carrying around and bumping into your legs and everything or tripping over, a big klutzy thing.

This is a, well, I'll read from the material here. You've got a tarp-grade vinyl body with a durable waterproof basin lining, nylon webbing straps, a rust-proof zipper, and plenty of pocket space for corkscrews and sunscreen, plus a built-in bottle opener. Just like Rick Flair.

In its own special pocket. Have you ever seen Rick's special pocket? I have not, or his special bottle opener. Well, it's what he'd use is with his woo energy drinks. Very good. You know what? You somehow made it all makes sense. It made it, brought it right back.

But this cooler, it's soft-sighted, it's pliable. You can mash it and mush it, so you could carry it in something else or put it away when there's nothing in it really easy. Yet it's highly durable, heavily insulated, and it holds a full case of beer cans or eight bottles of chilled wine if you choose to go in the direction of being a raging drunkard, or you can, if you're going to go out and have a cookout, go out to the park, sit by the creek, watch the puppies play or do something like that and grill out.

Maybe those of you in Florida, the lower part of Texas and out in California at this time of year. But nevertheless, anytime, and you can put burgers in there, you can put to cookout supplies, and it'll keep ice cold for, goddamn, and if you put ice in there,

then the ice will keep ice cold. Unless you ask for water. warmer ice. I'm sure they can give you that too. But nevertheless, the beach or the park or wherever you spend your leisure time can be so much better with the cooler bag from Renn with the stainless steel bottle opener. And it's fucking ginormous. It's just plain big. 23 liters is what it's measured at, tear resistant up to 375 pounds. And you got to got the nylon webbing strap and if anybody tries to say you're walking down the beach and you got this and it's over your shoulder or your arm with the strap you're an old lady

you're defenseless you're 70 years old and some thug some hooligan tries to snatch away your full goddamn case of beer cans well you can fucking hold on to that goddamn nylon webbing strap and he'll have to cut what are your hands off to get it away from you because this stuff won't break well there's a great example that obviously all the listeners can relate to so for all you old ladies out there walking on the beach with all your earthly possessions on hand case of beer cans oh beer cans that's what it was or eight bottles of wine if you want to be that way about it and you know and by the way why is why is the poor woman's family allowing her to walk down the beach with unaided carrying that much weight.

Eight bottles of wine? She's 77 years old. She's got osteoporosis. She's an independent lady. Well, God, they ought to give her some help. Maybe she doesn't want to help. You know how much a case of beer weighs? This poor woman, no wonder she's so distracted.

She's about to get mugged and hit over the head. But what if it's like a May Young? Just like, you know, to the end of time, she's Harley Race. Get out of my way, kid. she'd be the one jumping out from behind the sand dune hitting some guy over the head and stealing his wallet but she's not here anymore

well in her youth maybe I don't know if she was still doing those kind of tactics when her old mula were hanging out in Reno or whatever what did you say in her youth in her youth what are you watching my cousin Vinnie lately I said youth you've

you almost got it you you New Jerseyites I'll tell you but anyway you want to know how you can get Stuff like this in your Box of Awesome folks, I bet it's been a while since some of our listeners have had an awesome box. Well, we can rectify that. They'll stay away from your rectum, though.

But all you got to do is go to boxofawsom.com, spelled exactly like it sounds, and you enter the code JCE at checkout, and you get 20% off your first box of awesome. And it doesn't have to be a cooler. It can be anything. as we have mentioned so many times before, the incredible array, the knives, the barbecue rubs, the blacksmithingware, the multi-tools, the hot sauces,

the cocktail kits, the various items from small businesses around the country, possibly even around the world. They may have small Bolivia. I mentioned the knives. I think you need to reemphasize the knives. You are a scary son of a bitch sometimes. with your knives,

Mr. Cizzer Hands. You can't see what you can see. But all you do is you go to boxofawsome.com and you take the quiz to, they'll ask you questions about what you're interested in, and then they will supply you with things that fit your interests, and boom,

you get a new box every month, tons of different categories to choose from, each box valued at approximately $70 on the open market. Some of this stuff may go for 80 or 90 on the black market if you find somebody that's really in need. But you pay only a fraction of that price.

And again, you're supporting the small businesses. Yes. Yes, you are. 90% of everything that comes into your box of awesome is from a small up-and-coming brand. And the other 10% are just medium-sized. Well, yes, there's none of these monolithic chain store Walmart type of things going on in here. You're not going to get any true value items in here. These are handmade, hand-carved with us.

Sometimes the craftsmen and women and the artists that make these things, they don't even want to part with them. Some of these things have been literally ripped from their fingers against their better judgment and will in order to be sold at a fraction of their value to you, the consumer, so that you can save money. And those people, they had bloody food. finger nails from holding on to this shit, but it was more important that we get it to you at a

discount. A fair transaction between partners who enjoy doing business with each other led to these fine products ending up in this fine box that is indeed awesome and delivered right to you. Yeah. A partnership that everyone benefits from. A partnership, the consumer and the provider of the consumer product and the poor manufacturer, some of these people, they'll never get over it. Well, don't say poor, the manufacturer, and everyone's going to get over what? They're going to work together and make lots of money. These one-of-a-kind items that they've slaved over and they felt like they were their children, but now they've been sent away to you so that you people can save money.

You're saving a ton of money because you get 20% off your first monthly box, which is already underpriced for the value that you get. It's like stealing from these people. It's exactly not like stealing from these people. It's like working, it's like walking into a store and buying something from these people. These people are indeed the store owners. Well, these people aren't the store owners. Box of Awesome is the store owner.

These little small businesses working their fingers to the bone to make these fine quality products that you can't get anywhere else. In conjunction with Box of Awesome. Yes, Box of Awesome then takes these things away from the business. those people and pass the savings on to you. They make a deal the way any storefront would and they stock their shelves with the finest things that they then take off the shelves and put in these boxes and you never know what will arrive, but it'll be awesome. Their deal makers extraordinaire, they say, you got a nice place here.

It'd be a shame if something happened to it. Maybe I need some of your goods. That's not what they say. And then they pass the savings on. You did watch my cousin, Vitty. That is not what they say when they show up. They don't show up. The mailman does.

he gives you the box of awesome. The mailman has an awesome box, and he'll hand it right to you. Folks, once again, go to boxofawsome.com. Use the code JCE at checkout. You're going to get 20% off the first monthly box when you sign up there. You're going to save a lot of money.

You're going to get awesomeness in every box. And, you know, who cares what happens to these small, independent, you know, businesses along the way? Box of Awesome cares, weak hair. Well, we want to keep stringing them along to get more stuff from them. No, we don't. Yeah. No!

Box of Awesome.com. Well, yeah, that. promo code JCE 20% off. You can't beat the... Hey, some of these small businesses about to go under, you can save money, buy your shit back from us. You know, it's such an outrageous thing for you to say, I can't even... Ladies and gentlemen, Box of Awesome, of course, works with the finest brands that you've never heard of,

but you will and you'll enjoy their products. Box of Awesome, please check them out. Promocode JCE, 20% off. Let us know what you think. Don't listen to this guy. Jim, with a long-ass boring show like that when it's over with you, you have two options. You can go to sleep or you can have something to eat.

it is the time of year where we have a wonderful offer for post-raw food or any food delivered right to you that we could offer post-raw food wouldn't that be cooked also i got to be i promise you food that can be cooked is what i'm saying when you said a good night's sleep or something to eat i thought we were going to have to do the commercial where we were sleeping in the box of awesome but anyway i'll tell you what people do like to eat the days i understand it's never fallen out of favor in almost any environment in any society in any situation most people like to eat and the holidays is a time where you want to eat even more and you want to pig out on cow see what i did there you want to get some cattle byproduct i'll

tell you but the folks at omaha steaks they've got every they got every kind of animal you might want to take a knife and fork too they've got the butcher's cut filet mignon's the mouth-watering burgers the gourmet jumbo Franks. And nobody knows what kind of meat those son of a bitches are made out of. It's all kinds of animals and it takes all kinds of critters to make the Omaha Steaks, jumbo Franks and boy, do they taste tender, juicy, and good. And they're fat, they're plump when you cook them. Brian, if that's not a tagline that's still copyrighted by another hot dog company. But I'll tell you, have you heard about the amount of money that you're now able to save on the Omaha steaks? Because right now, folks, our friends at Omaha Steaks,

They know that times are tough at Christmas. You're trying to stretch your money. You may be buying gifts. You also got to feed a variety of homeless people in a neighborhood. So they're not only giving you a 50% off site-wide deal, I'm talking 50% off. That's half or nearly. But you can also get an extra $30 off with our promo code,

which is JCE. And once again, We've talked about it so many times when the box of Omaha Steaks arrives at your door or on your porch or if you know your mailman really well, he'll bring it right in your window and deliver it to your children while you're not home. No, no, the mailman, no, the mailman who has nothing to do Omaha Steaks, that is a government employee, if that is indeed the way it is sent, or FedEx man or UPS man, God forbid the DHL man, will deliver this to your front door. no questions asked they'll just leave it at your front door they were not

enter your home I lost track of what you were denying I think you said that the male man has nothing to do with your children but no in your case Brian that's the milkman but I'll tell you what at Omaha steaks.com

they're going to save you some money I'm talking when you open this box of goodness I'm not only steaks and not only burgers and not only Franks and they got chicken we've had Omaha Stakes chicken, and we've had Omaha Steaks Pork Chops, but they've also got the caramel apple tartlet desserts that your lovely wife likes, Brian,

as well as the mouth-watering potatoes all grottin side dish that I'm just all over, because you know what grotten means? Well, that's another word in some kind of fucking language for cheese. So anyway, this offer is not going to last long, folks, for the holiday stock up, put it in your freezer. it comes already frozen, sealed, vacuum-packed. I'm talking, this stuff is sealed like a moon rock. There's no way that any kind of even radioactive material could penetrate

the seal that they put this stuff in. You stick it right in a freezer, then you thaw it out, you pop it in the oven, or you put it on the grill, or you put it in the pan, or you stick it on the stick. Or however, if you eat it raw, who are we to decide and judge in your own home? Probably a good idea not to eat it. it raw, this wonderful Omaha Steaks package, whichever package it is that you get,

deserves to be cooked. Do not eat the steaks raw, only the chicken breasts. No, eat nothing raw. Eat it all cooked with fire. Well, what about the sushi? Use fire. They don't have sushi. They don't have sushi?

I don't think so. They better not. Well, I thought Sue said they had swell nevertheless. Omaha Steaks is the world's best beef naturally aged for the ultimate in tenderness, juiciness and flavor. So right there, elderly beef is coming your way for the holiday season. That was going to be Rick Flair's new gimmick in WWE.

Elderly beef? Elderly beef. And you can save 50% off of him sitewide. Plus, you can score an extra $30 off with the promo code JCE.E. That's at Omaha steaks.com. Every steak, every entree, flash, frozen, vacuum sealed, and ready when you,

are and here's another thing. Even whether it be the fillets, the burgers, especially the chicken breasts, whatever the case, if you put any of these while they're frozen inside a tube sock tie knot in it, you could whack somebody over the head and do some serious damage. Again, don't do that. And the difference between what you could do

and what you should do is a line that we should definitely push people to one side of, which is don't do it. They're polar opposites, those lines. and we're why are you trying to push people? Let their, let their natural moral code show them where to go, Brian. And it's all backed by Omaha Steaks Unconditional 100% Money Back Guarantee. That's a moral code for you. They'll give you your money back unconditionally.

But you better give them a good reason why they should. So anyway, folks, for a limited time only, get 50% off sitewide. Minimum order may be required. but when you're ordering half off meat, for Christ's sake, you've got to expect to order a little bit. I think you ought to get the whole cow. Maybe bring Bossie out on a leash. Just knock the horns off, bring her out on a leash.

I'll take her from there. Order the whole cow, 50% off sitewide, plus you're going to save an extra $30 using the promo code JCE at checkout, Omaha steaks.com. achieve gifting greatness today, as well as eating a lot of cattle byproduct. That's right. Don't do what you're not supposed to do.

What's that promo code one more time, Jim? JCE at Omaha Steaks.com. And don't do anything you're not supposed to do and don't even do some of the things you are supposed to do until somebody else tells you you're supposed to do them. Omaha Steaks. That was the AEW Women's Division, Britt Baker update. Yeah. Cash your check and like it, Chicky.

Well, whether you're Chicky Star or a star in your own right, we all deserve something awesome. And when it comes to awesome transitions, there's no better one than the one for the box of awesome from our friends at Be Spoke Post. How about that? Of all the transitions I've ever heard, that is certainly the most recent. I'll tell you, You could segue from goddamn peanut butter to battery acid fluidly and seamlessly. Brian, I'll tell you what, have you ever seen peanut butter come out of a box of awesome? It's even more awesome. But if you want battery acid, they got that for you too. They've got everything.

No, they don't have battery acid. Why would you even say that? They've awesome things. If one of these fine, small businesses across America that they pluck these items from and then send them on to you, if they make battery acid, I mean, if you, if you, want independently produced battery acid, I bet you that Box of Awesome.com, our friends

had bespoke post, would probably have the finest independently produced battery acid. Now that's the way to put it. If they did, which they don't, they would have the best, but they don't because they don't, but what they do is they have the greatest small business products like knives.

If they would, they could, but they can't so they won't. But if they did, well, they didn't because they wouldn't, because they couldn't do that to you. But what you do is you go to boxofawsome.com and you take a quiz and you're graded on this quiz. If you score below a certain grade, people come to your home and commit you for a period of 72 hours. No one will come to your home. You will not be committed. It's a measurement by the government to make sure that they know the mindset of the citizens.

So just answer these questions and then... What government? Well, it depends on where you're located. But then they'll shine a flashlight in your eyes you won't remember a... thing, folks, and then every month you will remember. You will remember. You'll remember when the box shows up that it's awesome

is what you'll remember. Yes. It's awesome because a box of awesome shows up and you will think, well, it's like somebody read my mind. Because I love this kind of stuff, but I certainly don't remember asking anybody for it. That's where

the beauty comes in. It's like a groundhog day of Christmas every month when this shit comes to you and you're pleased but you don't have any idea how the fuck they knew to send you shit like this that you would like so much and then it happens again the very next month a groundhogs day of christmas i mean it's it's like that and you say well i'll be a son of a bitch here's another box of stuff i like and i didn't even know it existed each box is valued at around seventy dollars but you're going to pay a fraction of that price because well boxofawsom.com

they know people and especially they know small up-and-coming brands and businesses around the country that need help and that aren't doing too well like the major big box retailers. They could always need a helping hand, help get their products out there, and Box of Awesome then collects up everything these people have and leaves them pretty much bare-walled in their brick-and-mortar stores or, you know, penniless, and then they take all that stuff and they send it to you and they charge. charge you a fraction of what it's worth. Because they don't care, because they just basically confiscated all this stuff from mom and pop.

No, they did not. They care. They care about mom and pop. They work with mom and pop and they bring mom and pop's product to all the children out there who are grownups, of course. To all the little children of the world. Over 18. A box of awesome to the children of the world. It's free to sign up and you can skip a month or cancel any time unless you're one of these small.

mom and pop businesses and then k you need to be working your fingers to the bone making this stuff no days off for you people work at your normal pace because get a nanny for the children these old people that are working in any nannies well they might you know hey old people need love too you said it was for the children as long as you can get it on you can get it on what is what are you talking about i don't even know what you're talking about you know if grandma gets pregnant these things can happen What does this have to do A box of awesome? That's because Well they can't take maternity leave

Because they need to make these products That go in your boxes of awesome And I mentioned the The fine cooler I got The chill cooler from the fine folks At WREN WREN the other day It's a tarp grade vinyl body

With a durable waterproof base And lining nylon webbing straps A Rustproof zipper And plenty of pocket space For corkscrews and Scuns Scuns Grasgris or scumscreens sunscreen. Did they have scum screen?

Can you screen yourself from having scum on you when you go in for a dip? I thought he said skunk at first. Well, it was scun screen, is what I was saying there. But nevertheless, it's a great cooler and it's stylish, and it holds a case of beer or eight bottles of wine, I think it said, or all the hamburger meat you can eat in one day. But they've got all kinds of things for camping and cookouts, barbecued rubs and spices.

and seasonings or knives, as you mentioned, hot sauces. There's a scuba diving kit from what I understood. I thought I saw something about that. And of course, remember I got the brown nosing, I mean the bourbon nosing kit, where I can train my nose to detect the fine quality sense and the bourbon materials here in the state of Kentucky. And all of these things, depending on your interest,

can be parts of your box of awesome. All you got to do right now, go to box of awesome, go to boxofawsom.com. Take the brief quiz. If you don't want to answer any of the questions about your sex life or your political affiliation, that's up to you, but just tell them what you're interested in.

And then every month you're going to get a new box, and it's going to be awesome. And did I mention mom and pop? So right now, go to boxofawsome.com. You're going to get 20% off your first monthly box, which is valued at a fraction of what it really costs. sir, did I say that right? It is valued.

It costs a fraction of its value. That's right. Rather than it's valued. You said that right. Well, one way or another, you're going to get a fraction of what you pay for here, folks. Every time, you're 100% guaranteed to get a fraction of what you pay for, courtesy of our friends at boxofawsom.com. Enter the code JCE at checkout and get 20% off your first.

monthly box box of awesome.com and somebody send brian another night but anyway so lashly basically knocked poor butch in a dreamland hey you know brian i had them redo those rings they used to be hard as concrete back in the 80s in the andre and hogan and bundy era but i've told you the story about how i had the the rings redone a little bit for the uh younger guys that were taking more bumps and how I talked Vince into it. But there's still those rings up there, there's still no Helix Sleep mattress. I think you can agree with this. I agree with what you're saying.

I agree with where you're going because I love Helix Sleep. See, Annette, Butch got knocked into Dreamland, but you don't have to have a 300-pound ex- Wrestling champion run you over to go to Dreamland yourself. All you need is a Helic Sleep mattress in your own home. and we've been talking about we both have them, we both love them. As a matter of fact, Stace just ordered another one that's amazing because not only is it good for her bad back as the other one was, but also it cools you to, it's the cool down.

I didn't realize I thought, well, I don't really need cool down. You never know how much you need cool down at night until you get the cool down mattress. Holy cow. It's like some kind of chemical wizardry. It feels like it's been in the refrigerator. You know, for a long time, you've had one Helix sleep mattress, and we've had several Helix mattresses here in the house.

Now all of a sudden you're starting to catch up. This is a competition, you think? Well, that's because you're just hoity-toity, and you change all of your major things in the house so often because you have that crew standing by. You've got the butler, you've got the downstairs made, the upstairs made, the chauffeur, the gardener. They just carry things in and out.

Well, it's just me and the Monroe's and the feather bottoms around here. and you know that all of them are severely under-equipped, either each of them has one arm or each of them has half a brain. Half a brain? Well, in the Monroe's case. But together they make... Shabbata, Monroe? No, no, they never divided Shabbata's brain.

Oh, that's true. That's true. That's true, but I'll tell you another thing. We've been talking about these helix mattresses for so long that, folks, you know the drill, you know about the 10 to 15-year warranty, you know about the 100-night-fews. free trial. You know about the fact that you're not going to have to go to a mattress store and lay on some filthy DNA-ridden mattress that other people have done. Lord knows what all over, especially when those stores are closed, that's where they have the big

parties. You don't have to do any of that with Helix, but also, we've now been told, we've been telling you, we've been alerted to this, helix mattresses do not contain fiberglass, which can be harmful to your health. Did you know, Brian, that some mattresses, some brands use fiberglass as a flame retardant in their mattresses, that you're sleepy. You've got your face buried in to fiberglass. Well, that could cut you wide open from asshole appetite.

That fiberglass, like any other glass, is sharp as a serpent's tooth. and you're not going to be sleeping on a bag of glass with a Helix sleep mattress. You know why? Because Helix owns its own manufacturing facility, which is entirely free from products containing fiberglass. And they've taken it a step further. They've banned all kinds of glass.

You can't wear your eyeglasses when you walk into this facility unless they're plastic. And they've taken out the windows. It's just a giant block of concrete. There's no sunlight that penetrates through any crack of this thing. It's like going into a tomb. As a matter of fact, some people, but the employees, by the time they take their eyeglasses off and work about 10 or 15 years in this entirely concrete encased facility, not only are they not exposed to any fiberglass or any other kind of glass,

but they start to mutate, much like the fish at the bottom of the lake under Mammoth Cave, where they eventually evolution takes over, and they have no. eyes. Who? So we've got to buy these mattresses to help out these people. The workers? The workers. They're going blind.

No, they're not. All to keep you free of fiberglass and fiberglass related injuries. All Helix workers, if that's what they are called, it sounds awful that way. All helix workers are happy. All helix workers will- Well, some of them are making the best of a bad situation. Yes, but if you, they're going blind for your comfort. So the least you can do, ladies and gentlemen,

is buy one of the most comfortable mattresses out there today that can be delivered right to your door that requires you not to go out in public and roll around on and you can try it out. If you don't like it, you can send it back, they give you your money back. There are suckers that way. But you're robbing them blind, literally.

Because these people are getting up their eyesight for your comfort. Figuratively, and metaphorically, you're robbing them blind. but in reality it's a wonderful deal from a wonderful mattress safe and right to you. I don't have time to look up the exact meaning of literally right now, but people use it in a lot of different ways. But right now, folks, if you want to save some money, I'll tell you what you can do as soon as I find the line that tells me. That's right, because Helix right now is offering 25% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners, in honor of the holidays, you go to Helix Sleep, that's H-E-L-I-X-S-L-E-P.com slash J-C-E, and you got to, I'll wait until you get a pen and paper, ladies and gentlemen,

because you're going to have to write this code down, so we'll wait just one moment while the pen and paper is found. The code is Helix Partner 25. Helix partner 25 because you're going to get 25% off see what they did there Helix partner 25 at Helixleep.com

slash JCE 25% off and two free pillows just because they love you and they're not going to cut you with glass save their eyesight that's right they're not going to cut you with glass they're great mattresses worry about nothing

but a good night's sleep which you won't even have to worry about that Helix sleep. One more time, what's that promo code? Hold on. Wake up. I was waiting for him to get a pen. Helix partner 25. But you know what all these guys need, don't you, Brian?

Well, I can think of a few things. What do you have in mind? Well, if you've had a cinder block bashed over the back of your head, if you've been double stomped from off the roof of the Superdome, if you've been wrapped up in barbed wire and slung around, like an Argentinian bolo, there's only one thing it's going to make you feel better, and that's CBD from CB Distillery.

Good idea. I'll tell you what, that's what all these guys need. I don't know if it really regrows brain cells. I think the jury is still out on that research is taking place, but CBD from CB distillery gives you less pain after exercise, and we're certainly talking about that, and it gives you better sleep after you've been awake. And then sometimes you can go to sleep right after you get up on this stuff.

I'm telling you. Well, you'll have the normal energy, but it will help you. It will age you with things like getting sleep and... Getting sleep. And then you'll wake up and you'll want to sleep again. You go back to sleep and boom, you're so comfortable there. You say, fuck it for the rest of the year. Not necessarily.

Let's not looking it that way. Perhaps while you're awake, you're dealing with some pains and aches from a good day at the gym. That's more reason to want to go to sleep. Well, the CB distillery finds CBD product will help with the sores, not sores, the aches and pains, and of course with the sleep. We are not sure, ladies and gentlemen, if it helps with those sores, I mean, you can rub it all around your lips and your anal orifice. I'm not sure if the sores will go away, but you'll get better sleep, and they'll be less sore. Apply as recommended. Apply is recommended.

Not for anal insertion. No. I don't even know why. No, no. Well, you just, you know, that's when you've got a product like that. That's a personal grooming or health product or something like that. You need to make sure you put on the warning label, not for anal insertion. That's on all the packages over at the store.

CB Distillery has you covered with their full range of carefully formulated CBD and plant-based solutions, none of which are designed. to shove up your sphincter, but all of them are designed to help you lead a happier and healthier and easier life. Their healing plant compounds are made with the highest quality, clean ingredients. There's no artificial colors, flavors, or preservationists involved in this stuff. Preservatives. That's what it is. Preservationists.

With over 2 million customers and a 100% must. money back guarantee I'll have you know the CB Distillery is the source to trust. Two million customers. Imagine you go out in public right now in the United States of America. One out of every 150 million. Is it no, two million is 300 million people in a two million. One out of every 150 people in the country is right now hopped up on the stuff from CB distillery.

They're not hopped up. They are. Well, they're happy as clams. hopping. They're walking down the street. They're skipping. There's a pep in their step because they're sleeping better. They've got the gift of a calmer mind and better sleep and less pain after exercise or less pain after, you know, being beaten up, physically assaulted. Let's say that, you know, every day you walk home from work or school and the mean kids, they step out from behind a corner, they turn your pockets inside out. They slap you around a little bit and shove you over

into shrubbery. Once again, this is for adults over the age of 18. Well, that's why I'm saying you coming back from work or school. Work? Well, you could be going to college. You could be working down on Wall Street. You go around the corner there by the subway stand and this kid comes out, he fucking slaps you around, shoves you down, kicks you. You've seen these videos on a subway of these random people. Is walking to... So, if somebody's kicked the shit out of you today, you take one of these fine products from CB distillery, you'll feel less pain.

So everybody living in a city next to a subway should have some of this on hand just in case you get the shit kicked out of you on the way home. And with the code JCE, you can now stuff everybody stocking full of CBD for 20% off. 20% off, no prescription required whatsoever. way you don't have to forge anything ladies and gentlemen there you just it's a free for all you're just going to get it without paperwork just as long as you've got money c b distillery you don't know

how to dispel distillery or how to dispel distillery well here it is d i s t i l l l e rye c b distillery dot com enter the code j c e for 20 percent off your order so you can stock everybody up with better sleep and peace of mind and tranquility and ecstasy and bliss. You know, if ignorance is bliss, most people should be ecstatic. Once again, what's that promo code, Jim? Cbdistillery.com promo code JCE for 20% off. Well, Brian, I'll tell you one thing they're probably not going to do next year, so you better take advantage of it while it's here now, and that's the Omaha Steaks.

offer that's going on right now, 50% off-site-wide. How can they do that again next year? How could they possibly repeat something like this? There won't be enough cattle left. I don't think they have to worry about the cattle, but they have wonderful deals all year-round. And, of course, right now a specifically great deal for the listeners and the hungry out there. After this big sale, you won't be able to find a cow within 500 miles of you, folks. I'm telling you right now.

So your tongue's going to slap your brains out over this one, though, because the folks at Omaha Steaks, I said 50% off-site-wide. I'm talking about the butcher's cut filet mignon's, the mouth-watering burgers, the gourmet jumbo-franx that we've talked about the bulbousness and the girth and the length

of them. They've got easy to prepare meals that are ready in a flash, the sides, the caramel apple tartlet desserts, all that kind of stuff, and it's the holidays. You've got all kinds of moochers, I mean family, coming over to visit you and eat your food and

drink your liquor and mooch have their way with your women, whatever the case they're coming for. Well, you never know what some of these people are up to. That's why you've got to have plenty of steak to distract them. And their families? You're talking to my families. Well, you know what?

Hey, what's an Alabama family reunion, but a great place to meet women. But I'll tell you right now, if you go to Omaha Steaks.com, you're going to meet some cows that you're never going to forget. From Ferdinand to Bossy and so many. anymore. Stop it back there. And again, 50% off site wide, but we can save you even more money than that. Because at the holidays, everybody does need to save money because of the amount of people that

are coming over to freeload. So if you go to Omaha Stakes.com and use the promo code JCE at checkout, you're going to get an extra $30 off your order. So 50% off to begin with, and then $30 off of that, well you can get that thing down to 12.5% and that's below the legal limit. But not for driving. I don't know. What legal limit? The cholesterol limit.

So anyway, right now, save 50% off, then get $30 off of that. If you go to Omaha Steaks.com, use the promo code JCE. They're going to send you whatever you order and it's all going to be delicious. And you can just set fire to the whole bundle and cook it all at the same time. just stick your face in it and scarf it up, or you can put it in the freezer because it's already vacuum sealed and airtight, like the Lost in Space airlock. No air is going to get into this stuff until you're ready, and you can eat it a little bit at a time, but that's no fun. There are cooking recommendations with each order. They do have recipes there, and the Omaha Steaks

seasoning. To make anything, you put that stuff on a leather boot, it'll taste good. And I believe the last time I was over to your house for dinner, that's what your mother did. Hey. Put it on a leather boot. It wasn't leather. Well, it may have been swayed. I certainly was swayed not to eat at your place again,

but folks, you won't have that problem. If you're serving Omaha Steaks, people will come from miles around to your home to just climb in the window and just eat off of your table. I'm talking strangers, homeless people, bums. No. And all of that service. Men of these men.

Tradesmen, door-to-door, siding salesmen, they'll be busting your door down, getting into your refrigerator, eating off of your table when you serve food like this. You won't be able to stop them. You will be able to stop anyone trying to get into your home. Once again, you will enjoy the food, the fine food, the wonderful, delicious, fine, fine,

delectable food from Omaha steaks. But you also don't have to worry about anyone coming in. No one will know you have this unless you alert them to it. You need to call the police ahead of time before you. Omaha steaks are so good and so tasty. If you don't call the cops and have them put a cordon of security around your home before you cook this stuff, I guarantee you, you will be invaded by hordes of hungry people.

No, you cannot guarantee that. Stop, stop, stop, stop. Well, I'm just, there's a lot of hungry people out there. And they don't know about the half-off deal. So maybe we could solve world hunger if everybody knew that Omaha steaks right now are half off and $30 on top of that with promo code JCE. I don't know how that solves world hunger. hunger how does that sell world hunger because everybody could afford this okay well so just get the word

out people what do you do if you want to help get the word out to stop hunger in the world for christmas get the word about this deal out because everybody even the people in farthest of Tibet want to save half off that's right ladies a gentleman even in furthest to bet you can save made great savings. Because the internet's made the world a smaller place now. So Omaha snakes.com, whether you're in a monastery in Tibet or down at a weather station in Antarctica, you want to save half off and then take 30 bucks off again on meat that you can eat in a variety of ways and places, put in a variety of different recipes.

Yeah, you can stretch this shit for a while. And if you live in Antarctica, you don't need to put it in. in the freezer. Omahasteaks.com. That's a good point. Good point. Provo code JCE. Jim, they say that

CM Punk is straight edge. In fact, he says it. In fact, he uses the straight edge of a knife to cut his steak for dinner from Omaha Steaks, I presume. How the fuck did you even remotely get there

in your head before you lathered it out or dribbled it out, I should say. Magic. You know, We got to do an old-time radio show just to use those sound effects. And the killer is revealed to me the guy that killed your cow at Omaha Stakes, folks, because it's time. And there he goes, as a matter of fact.

That's what the sound the cow makes right before he goes to, his great reward. You know what your great reward will be is the smiles on people's faces when you feed him that cow. and that's the cow that our friends at Omaha Steaks are going to send you along with they've got chickens they've got whatever thing goes into the jumbo franks they got plenty of those too they've got all kinds of stuff that's right beef and beef products and meat and pork and chicken and all and apple tartlets don't forget those and of course potatoes and i'm not forgetting any of those things and all parts of those animals and many more go go in the gourmet jumbo franks they gore they gore they go They gore in there. You can gore an apple fans. The butchers cut filet mignon's, the mouth-watering burgers. You just got where that was from. The gourmet jumbo Franks, the easy-to-prepared meals, the folks at Omaha Steaks, because it is the holidays.

And people are going to be eaten and they're going to have people over-mootian off of them. Omaha Steaks is not only giving you 50% off site-wide, And that's everything on the order one of everything. A minimum order may be required, but you can't go on there at order one pork shop, but expect to get half off. And when you use the promo code JCE at checkout, you're going to get an additional $30 off of your order after you got the 50% off. This is, it's just crazy.

It's not right. These people ought to be put away in a state home somewhere where they can't harm others. but while they're still able to knock the shit out of a cow, you can send tender, juicy, butcher's cut filet mignon's and burgers and francs and all that stuff to yourself or to anybody else you want to. Give them his gift, give people food.

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co jacete final words about Tony Con and all this um I'd like to say I knew Tony Conwell Those are the final words Tony needs Somebody around him needs to say Tony you need to take a vacation

For a couple weeks You need to God damn start on decaf Or maybe get a full physical examination Sleep for 8 hours Do something Calm the fuck down

And reevaluate your priorities What's going on And Don't rely on cage match instead of the cold hard facts of the ratings of the programs

and don't rely on jousting with people on Twitter when you've got a serious issue of absolutely no healthy fucking main event level individual star

on your roster that people aren't sick to fucking death of. Start with that. Well, we'll see how all that works out, but you said, you know, one of the things Tony Kahn can do is get a good night's sleep. We know someone who may be able to help him with a good night's sleep. Well, you know, that's true. And actually, our friends at Helix, by the way, Helix sleep mattresses, we've been talking about them for ages because you and I both and our family members and close personal friends and our pets, we all lay our weary bones out at night when we're ready to stretch out or fold up or, or flop down or whatever description best fits the individual

and have a good night's sleep. We're all on the Helix sleep mattresses. But, you know, I'm wondering, do they have... They used to remember in the hotels, Brian, are you old enough? Remember when you'd stay at like a holiday inn or some kind of hotel on the roadside in the 60s? The bed for a quarter, you could put a quarter in, and it would vibrate for about 15 minutes.

vibrating bed. That was so those weary travelers driving could lay down and get like the vibrating massage. And boy, that was a treat especially when me and Mama Cornett would go out to visit my grandmother out in Hopkinsville.

We would stay at the place. They had the dagum quarter thing. Boom, turn to vibrate for 15 minutes is so much fun. It sounded like a goddamn lawnmower. It was very loud. But it was vibrating. And that was entertainment to a fucking child.

those days. Except for then the final time I got the room with the vibrating bed and I put the quarter in and I turned the thing and I laid back and as it started vibrating, apparently it had been under heavy usage at that particular location

and the fucking thing fell right out from under the goddamn bed and landed on the floor. It was going, like that and I couldn't figure, I can't turn it. There's no way to turn the goddamn thing off now. I'm trying to turn the goddamn thing off now. I'm trying to turn the god damn it. And I'm screw mama, mama, mama, because I'm like fucking nine or whatever. And she can't.

I think she somehow found a way to pull the plug. Well, you don't have to do that with Helic sleep mattresses. But what I was going to wonder is, instead of a vibrating mattress, Brian, do you think they have a mattress that will keep people from vibrating? Like Tony Kahn, because you can tell he's bouncing off the walls. He's shaking like a dog shit and peach seeds. When he lays down, there needs to be some kind of, I don't know, sealant foam that encompasses him that holds him in place for the night so that he doesn't

rattle and rotate and vibrate the whole goddamn house apart. I wonder if they have one of those at Helix. Well, you know, they have the sleep survey that you do to get the right mattress, and I would have to think Tony Kahn, based on the way he behaves his condition, I don't think he needs a firm mattress. I think it needs to be one that you can kind of sink into. Almost one that you could fold up on both sides of him, like a little Tony burrito and maybe staple it and keep him in one place for a while.

I did not say any of that, but maybe... Well, you know, if you get as one soft enough, it's like you don't have to roll the body up in a carpet like so often happens when you're out and about. You can just fold the mattress up around the body. I don't know anything about that kind of stuff. I ain't got nobody. But I'll tell you what, Helix does have the mattress for the big and tall, folks.

They have the plus size mattress for the big and tall. what it says, and that gives you plenty of room to do whatever you want, because you don't have, you can get this without being either unnaturally large or, you know, offensively tall or big or whatever, you know, like the, I'm sure the thousand pounds sisters on that TV program, they're probably on a helix, because look at the state of them. Or if you're, if you're just a giant, if you're seven and a half feet tall, but you only weigh say 190 pounds your feet are size 22 but it looks like

you're standing in canoes you can get one of these and if you have to you sleep quarter to corner we'll work it out just tape measure yourself and fill the application out I don't know how much of that would apply here but again ladies and gentlemen you want a good night sleep a comfortable mattress the right mattress for you

yeah even if you're offensively large and grotesque they've got they're gonna service you no matter how much society shuns you If you're a grossly obese and just your skin looks like goddamn baggy fucking skin on a goddamn old goat, you'll still find people that will love you and deal with you here. They won't shun you or turn you away because your appearance. I don't want to talk about goat love or whatever it is that you're trying to talk about here, but we're talking about comfortable beds and comfortable mattresses.

And of course, nobody, as you said earlier, Do you think Tony should record a version of Just the Jigolo? Oh, you know, as a matter of fact, come on. Bopo-de-Bop-Dibap, skiddy-bop, I think that would be perfect for him. He could have the little top hat on like Michigan J. Frog and the cane. I'm just the jigolo, and everywhere I go, I fear for my life. Well, yes, because they got jigilos that operate on a Helix sleep mattress too, you know.

because it's highly popular in that line of work because of its exuberance and also its resilience to stand up under punishment because every Helix elite mattress comes with a 15-year manufacturer's warranty and all of them come with a hundred-night free trial and as matter of the other ones come with a little shit

I think there's a 10-year warrant hey if you're if you're 60-65 years old just go ahead and buy this and say fuck it you won't need another one. Well, let's not look at it that way. You'll be fucking, you'll be in the ground. You'll be pushing up daisies. You'll be fertilizer.

Let's not. By the time, you need a new mattress so you can not have to worry about that. Do you want to be laying on your deathbed at the old folks home, Brian, last, thinking, oh, God, damn. I'm going to live three months. But, God damn it, my mattress is going to wear out in six weeks. I should have done something 12 years ago. I don't plan on leaving last manner if I'm in that state

I'm not going on an old folks home Well you don't want to be whatever you're laying on Are you by the time that because you're a young man By the time that you reached that point You could have blown all the money and you could be sleeping on a fucking stack of rocks And by the time on that age they may discover something that causes life to Go on forever so it may not be your last helix sleep mattress There's always more and they're always comfortable and they're always right for you

And there's always a great way to sleep on them Heelix sleep See, I got a loophole in that Because if you're going to go on forever You want the best quality mattress So get one of these right now Because if it's guaranteed for 15 years They probably think things are going to last for 20

So you're just You're doing the right thing financially If you go right now If you're young by three That's 45 years covered Well there you go Just get three of them Because you're going to get 20% off

So there you go Get three of them And you'll get 60% off Helix right now is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. If you go to Helix H-E-L-I-X sleep.com slash J-C-E and use the code Helix Partner 20. You're going to get 20% off and two free pillows. So if you are a person and they got to, let's say the elite's got the 15-year warranty, the other's got the 10-year warranty, let's say you go for an elite.

and you're a person who is 30 years old and you expect live to be 75 years old. Right now you get three mattresses. You'll get six free pillows. And 20, so you get 60% off, 20% off times three, right? Is that the way that that would work? Brian, there's got to be a loophole in that somehow. There certainly does. There's a double standard.

It's a double standard. Oh, it's a double standard instead of a fucking reverse okey doke. Well, you'll still get 20% off three mattresses. So it'll be like you got 60% off one mattress, and that means you've got a 33 and a third percent chance of loving each of those mattresses. So right now, helixleep.com slash jCE, use the code Helix partner 20

and buy three mattresses. Actually, you could buy six, because if you got a friend the same age, they're going to be in the same fucking boat. So just go ahead and get six, give three to them, keep three for yourself. You'll never have to buy another mattress again. And you'll have enough pillows for a New Orleans whorehouse.

If you buy five beds, you get a free Jim Cornett autograph. All right, all right. But you have to prove it. You have to prove it. You have to prove it. And then you have to come and take it from an envelope hanging on my fence. Why? Why do we have to make it so problematic?

everyone to get the money. Well, I'm not going to run over to the post office just for that. Helixleep.com. Yeah. What's the promo code? JCE and well, it's slash JCE and the promo code is Helix partner 20. That's what it is. And that's what it is. And a lot of people don't think it be like it is, but it do. Jim, that was AEW Dynamite and that was the return of the Young Bucks, the elite back, running things in AEW, Hangman Page, getting involved in the main event picture, and how the Young Bucks showing up with their new hat and look. And of course, if you had to place a bet on what you thought was going to happen at AEW Revolution, Stings retirement match, will it go over with that crowd, will it not work with that crowd, will it be

an excellent match, will be the tribute everyone wants? If you wanted to place a bet, you may be able to go to the official partner in one sense or another of hours? What are they exactly? I don't know where you're, will it go around in circles? Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky? Will it go around in circles? I'm talking about our friends at Draft Kings

and they believe in us so much that their copy is bare this week, ladies and gentlemen. Well, you know, here's the thing. You know, they know that neither one of us are experts in the gambling philosophy because, you know, we're inexperienced. We're naifs. We're naive. We're babes in the woods at the...

The last time that I placed a bet and won that bet was in 1986 when I won $50 off of Rick Flair in the University of Louisville, North Carolina college basketball showdown. And I quit while I was ahead. And you're not a big sports bet or even though you're a sports fan,

but there are people. We are broadcasting. to right now that on a regular basis they go out there and they win all kinds of money they have new swimming pools put in with the money they win they have new hookers come over to the house with the money they win whatever they do with their money it's up to them folks it is not for us to judge or maybe they just invest in their reasonable nice people in their and they're reasonably nice people who can invest in hookers and blow and things like that that's not an investment That's an expenditure.

That's not an investment. But then you're going to get, in return, you're going to get something for it, a good time for at least a period of time. Comedia, gonorrhea. Yeah, and then the leprosy angle comes in. But anyway, a lot of the listeners out there, they like to bet on the sports. They like to win the bets that they place, obviously. Sometimes you lose. These collector's plates can go down.

However, if you go to Draft King, right now, the official sports betting partner of the NFL playoffs at a fine, fine sponsor of ours is what you were trying to say earlier, they're going to help make the playoffs electrifying because you'll be shocked. Boy, when you make these bets and you see what happened, you'll be fucking shocked. Because new customers right now, you bet $5 on any of these games and you get $200 instantly in bonus bets. So they're just going to give you $200 if you bet $5. So if you win, well, you're just, you're practically fucking robbing them at gunpoint

for heaven's sake. You're practically not robbing them. You're practically doing things the right way, the way they want you to do it. Well, you can win a lot more money by betting $205 than you can by betting just $5. And it's their money that they're going to be giving. giving you if you win. See, you're just stealing. You're stealing from these people. You're not stealing. You're accepting, I don't even know if a gift is a right word. Are you accepting some kind of bribe or to not over and rough them up if they don't pay off?

What are you talking about here? There are no bribes involved in this. You're accepting a gratis, a wonderful gift for free. And a, you're doing it without any robbery being involved. You got $5 in it. You ain't going to win this one. You can download the draft king's four. book app right now and use the code JCE. That's the way that you get the $200 in bonus bets when you bet $5. And I don't know if that goes up in increments. For example, if you were to bet $50, would you get $2,000 in bonus bets? I don't know.

Maybe the crown is yours, they say. Maybe this whole scam is geared toward you. Seems like that would be just like taking candy from a baby. Let's make sure we understand that it is not a scam. this is not a stand. It's an arrangement, wink, wink. But right now, if you download the Draft King's Sportsbook, you just do whatever you do

to download a Draft King's Sportsbook app or any other app for that matter. However you download an app, you do it. And then apparently some guy in a fucking pinstripe suit comes knocking on your door and delivers you the goddamn odds and everything, and then you place your bets

with that gentleman. And you better pay up when he comes back. if you lose, but if you win, you'll be bringing you cash in a black briefcase, handcuffed to his wrist. No cash? Well, I shouldn't say that, but no briefcase. There will be no gentleman coming to your door. It's a virtual online gentleman that you'll have no actual real-time interaction with. So he's virtually a gentleman, but not quite. It's not even he. It's an it. It's a virtual it. Well, no, hey, now, even though the line of work he's in is considered shady by some, there's no reason to dehumanize this poor guy. That's not what I'm doing. I'm saying it overall is a virtual it that controls

draft kings. It's not necessarily a man in a top hat coming to your door. We're trying to get people to do business with draft kings and it's controlled by a virtual it. What is this some kind of artificial intelligence trying to take over the world? They're trying to get our information. Virtual it is what happens when you don't send copy for your spot. Well, download the draft king sports book ads. if you know how to download an app, because I don't know how to do that, and use the code JCE, and if you know how to bet on sports, which I have no experience with either,

then if you bet $5 and you're a new customer, you're going to get $200 bucks and bonus bets. And if you watch these people play the football, and you're reasonably certain you can figure this shit out, well, go ahead and do it. Draft King's Sportsbook app right now, code JCE, 200 bucks and bonus. bonus bets. It's, that's, that's the best I can do for you, not having a single fucking clue of how this whole shit works. That's right. And whether you have a clue or not, Draft Kings is there for you.

One more time. What's that promo code, Jim? JCE. The crown is yours. And also, it says, gambling problem. Call 1-800 gambler or visit www.1-800 gambler.net in New York. Call 8778, Hope New York or text Hope, New York, 467369. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-887-777. Boy, you hit the jackpot. Don't call, just play again.

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See dkNG.com slash football for eligibility and deposit restrictions, terms, and responsible gaming resources. Or just don't do any of that and just make your bet to see what happens. All right, Draft Kings, the official betting partner of Jim Cornett.

But Jim, with that, we're going to move on to AEW Dynamite. Remember what I had C-C back in their copy? Instead of C-1, it said C-C. Yeah, C-C-Rider.

Just see what you have done. Oh, C-C-Rider. Speaking of the book of Haman, he's still trying to book a partner. He was in the back, frustrated. He's got his head in his hands. And in comes purely dreary. Letitia and Claudia. I can't remember what their fucking names are. And they've got the accents and they offer their services. But then Paul says, I need one guy and to face L.A. Knight and Randy

Orton and fucking AJ Stiles. And all of a sudden then they they get the limber tail as JR used to say, and they start backing up and excusing their way out of it, and then they bid him adieu. This is, this gimmick, these guys, I don't think they can ever overcome it, and they don't really look particularly impressive to begin with, but this is a holdover from when Vince McMahon was around, and I hope that this stuff can be weeded out, because there's no sense when you're, when you have this many stars and you have guys at the top of the car that people are caring about, about you want to keep it that way. Why have this fucking stupidity and silliness where some average person can point at your show

and look and say, why do you watch that stupid shit? And be right. And, you know, it's not necessary. Nobody's watching the show because this fucking fall to all. Why do they have to have anybody that just looks purely fucking stupid for no reason? That's my thought for the day. That should be on a t-shirt, right? there. There you go. Everything I just said for the last minute and half, just small print,

and people have to lean over and invade your space to read it. And so then Heyman goes and he finds Lashley and the street profits. And he tries to sell Bobby Lashley, you and the bloodline. And he said, the only way I want to see Roman Raines is if I'm standing across the ring from him. And he walks off on Paul. And you know what I was thinking at that point, Brian's Solomon? What? You know I was thinking about poor Heyman at this point, overwrought, anxiety ridden, stressed out, his whole world's falling apart, the bloodline, his meal ticket is going to be vaporized here just shortly. He's thinking, I got a plan ahead and try to figure out a way to save money on my wireless plan. Clearly. Because he's always having to call Roman Reins and

who knows where the fuck Roman Raines goes these days when he's not on Smackdown. or raw. He could be in the South Pacific. He could be in the South of France. He could be in South Alabama. You never know. But that's why the Paul Heyman's wireless bill is so damn high, just like the rent. But now, if he would listen to this program, Brian, if Paul Heyman would take the words that we say to his heart, he could get a cell phone plan for Mint Mobile for only $15 a month when he buys a three-month plan. And you know, Roman Raines is going to last more than three months as a top guy, so he's going to have to be calling him at the end of every television episode.

These things add up. You call Samoa talk for 15 minutes. Well, on some wireless plans, they'll charge you $279.48. That's what it says right here in this copy. But Mint Mobile, it's all included because MinMobile is unlimited. That means you can call Cambodia and recite the Gettysburg address. Fuck Mitt Mobile. They got to pay for it.

You're only paying $15 a month. Is this American Samoa that we're talking about? Because that might make a difference. Well, it could be communist Samoa. I don't know if they still have an enclave over there. And also, it's unlimited text and talk. So let's say you just want to sit there and let your thumbs do the walking as you harass and stalk, some poor innocent female who may not even be aware that you have these intentions

until you send her a manifesto about all the various ways that you would like to whisper sweet nothings in her ear. Yeah, nobody, it ain't going to cost you a thing. No, nobody, well, maybe your dignity, it might cost you. Well, but you already don't have any of that if you're doing that in the first place, do you? True, that's true. The high speed data, whatever kind of, let's say you need a question answered and you needed answered quick. How can I cure Aunt Fannie's crotch rot? Boom. They're going to give you the

data in high speed, just instantly like that. And it says, so you can ask as many questions as you want. Just talk to your phone. Put the phone in your hand and say, hey, Mint Mobile, answer me this. And they got to answer you unlimitedly. Data, talk, text, it all 15 bucks a month. You know, I had an Aunt Fannie. I don't think she had that particular, well, I mean, she probably wouldn't have told me if she had that ailment or not, but I did have an Aunt Fanny. Well, I was about to ask if you did investigate your Aunt Fannie's crotch on a regular basis to determine whether that some type of fungal infection. My poor Aunt Fannie.

Oh, Miss you rest of peace. I'm sorry, Aunt Fannie. She's dead and you're talking about this? Why would you tell the people that your poor dead Aunt Fanny had fungal infections in her taint? Well, I said had. that I no longer have an Aunt Fannie, right? Oh, I thought you meant that she cured it. You mean she never cured it?

I doubt she ever had it. Had it to her grave, huh? It was a chronic condition. Well, nevertheless, folks, you'll have Mint Mobile to your grave also, but $15 a month, especially for you elderly people, and don't plan to live too much longer. It's not going to cost you an arm and a leg, merely a life and a death. and right now if you go to

mintmobile.com slash jCE you will be able to get your wireless plan set up and you'll cut it to 15 bucks a month from whatever you're paying now with these cut rate competitors these cutthroat these scam artists

these bullshit artists that want to charge you $279.48 for a call to South Samoa no more of that call Samoa with impunity mintmobile.com slash JCE

and get this new customer offer your three-month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month. Some additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply, but not in Samoa. See Mint Mobile for details on that whole line of bullshit I just described to you.

There you go. Well, nobody's done more for cell phones over the years than Paul Heyman, so he deserves some type of special deal. I mean, that guy has been, that guy has been using a cell phone. Oh, you're telling me. You're telling me how long Paul Heyman's been using a cell phone.

Do you know what I would do if he hit me over the head with his cell phone right now? I would look at him and smile and bend over and fart in his general direction. Because these things are barely the size of a credit card. True. Well, yeah. That fucking phone in 1988, it was the size of a fucking construction brick. and it was shaped in an odd fashion and the antenna stuck out and it busted me open from asshole appetite.

That's my story. I know. I know. Well, that's what he's done. He's found a different way to use it. He always puts a cell phone in the mix. He's not going to attack anybody with an iPhone. That would be ill-advised.

But he found a way. Look at the state of him now physically. I mean, you know, he has to have help in the mornings when they feed him his oatmeal with X-lax. I really appreciate that Paul Heyman has in his later years turned into Zero Mustel from the producers. I'm really very glad that that happened. Max! Max B. Alley Stock! Right.

I'm wearing a cardboard belt! You know, I've leaned toward Hitchcock, but now I can see, I can see the Zero Mastel in Paul E. It's very heartwarming to see him morphing into all these beloved entertainment films. figures. It is in his elder years. He just needs a Gene Wilder to play off. And I think it's the milk of magnesium is doing him good. What I was going to say is the key to success. Yes.

In WWE traditionally is making sure you look the way Vince wants you to look. Yes. And a lot of the time, like a Scott Hall became famous, well, in the AWA, AWA famous with a big mustache. But by the time he got the Vince, He had gone through a few things. He had been a diamond stud. He had his greatest success.

No mustache. Just got rid of it. Just got rid of it. There are many, many other examples of Vince saying, get that shit off your face. But where do you go to take care of that? What do you do if you're on the road and you need a good razor or you're at home?

Or you're at home? You can be at home. Your hair grows at home too, Brian. Are you going for the Guinness Booker? World Records for the longest transition segue into a particular subject? That's right. And we're talking to... The point...

The point on top of my head is pointing towards our new friends, Harry's. That even sounds verbally unwieldy. Our new friends Harry's. Our new friends Harry's. How acquainted have you gotten with our new friends Harry's? Well, ladies and gentlemen, there are certain things we can't talk about here on the air, but... I think you... You pluralize...

something that you should have been in there as a possessive proposition in there. But our new friends at Harry's may have been clearer or our new friend Harry's as a collective group reference. But when you're talking about

the Harries. The Harries. The Harries of the world unite. Look at here. Here's the goddamn deal. A lot of times, because we have a male audience out there, and many of our female listeners also grow hair in various places.

And we've taught you how you can smooth out the nether regions and make things more pleasant for your significant other. But now we're going to talk about your people's faces out there. The faces, the things that you apparently don't look at in the mirror sometimes, because have you noticed that there are a lot of people you will see walking down the street these days, Brian. They got their mush all fucking hairy and stabbled and unkempt. It looks like their face was put together like a ransom note. And that's what you're presenting to the whole world, not just people that are rooting and scooting with you and doing the tootin on your fluting,

but the people that are just idly walking down the street past you, minding their own business, and they got to look at that fucking face. So you don't need to look like a caveman or like somebody that's been in some kind of medically induced coma for years, you've got to keep your face reasonably coherent, consistent, and groomed appropriately. Wouldn't you say, Brian, that that is a reasonable thing to ask to be able to go out in public, that you not frighten the passers by?

That's right. A coherent face is a good idea. Yes, don't scare people. So, folks, now we're not talking about down south at the plantation. We're talking about up north on your chinny, chin, chin. Our friends at Harry's shaving have got a remarkable deal for you where it'll cost you almost nothing to be presentable and not be asked to not look at other people's children.

And look at this. It comes in a bag. Can you hear this bag? It is a heavy-duty polyethylene bag with everything you need for a smooth shave. And it's got a cute little caricature on it of a guy shaving with shaving cream on and he's holding Harry's razor,

Cherry's razor, unlike Occam's, will actually do you some good. Because this bad boy, I'm holding my hand. It's got an orange handle. So this thing is like, it's like you can find it like you can find a hunter in the woods during deer season. So nobody gets shot. The orange handle, if you drop it in the bathtub and the sud, you'll be able to pick it out. And it's got a nice, it's a pivoting head.

it goes to and fro, to and fro. You can actually, if you use your index finger while you're holding this ergonomically designed handle in your hand, you can kind of make it look like it's winking at you. It's too and fro, two and fro. And it has one to... Well, there's a cover on this because it comes with a travel cover,

so you can't cut yourself inadvertently or accidentally. And I'm trying to count, and I believe this is five blades. Is it four or five? It's got the cover on it, and I can't... I believe it. It's five. Can't figure out how to get the cover.

Oh, my God, I've cut myself. No, you have not. Will you stop that? You have not cut yourself. It's a safety. I'm squeezing it now. Just see if it's bad. Oh, it's spurting.

Oh, it's spurting. It's on my, on my finger. Is there an artery in your finger? No, actually, I took the cover off easily. And there's one, two, three. See, the blades are so small. I need glasses. There's five blades and a lubricating strip.

but once again this is not for the nether region so don't try to lubricate anything down there with the strip but this is for your face and it will it'll make you slicker and come on a gold tooth i opened this thing up and i was like well i've got to see this in action and it did not disappoint so i can't get the fucking lid back on it now though we're going to work on that it also comes with harry's foaming shave gel which lathers richly to soothe and cushion and it's got aloe in it alo Leilani who used to wrestle in the South Seas you're you rub a small amount of this in circular motions until you're foamy and then the razor

just takes it right off you got the boxy and a card that says hello from Harry's but wait there's more we offer a wide range of everyday grooming essentials from shower to skin care. Every product thoughtfully designed and crafted. And you can sign up for the shave plan, and they keep you stocked up with all of the five-blade.

Good Lord, you could probably, you could do your lawn with this thing, though. It looks like a sturdy piece of business. But don't shave your crotch with this, because then you're bringing it back up to your face. Ladies and gentlemen, we're talking about razors for your face. We're specifically talking about. You have razors for your face. Well, you know, some of these degenerates out there,

they take any product that's designed for another part of the body, and they instantly go to the genitalia. You just did that. You're the degenerate that just did that. I'm trying to talk people out of it. But anyway, folks, again, it's Harry's, and where is Harry's? Well, Harries is at Harries.com. And right now, if you go to harries.com slash J-C-E,

that's where you save the big money because you can get the razor that I just talked about with the weighted and ergonomically designed handle you get the foaming shave gel and the travel cover $3. $3. This five blade of implement cartridge at the top here

this is one of those things that they have FBI agents standing ready to take you down if you walk out of Kroger without paying for one of these things. and bells and whistles go off. These things are so highly prized and such in demand that they chain them to the shelves over at the local grocery store, but you're getting this not only the razor that it goes on,

but also the cartridge and the shaving gel and the travel cover. $3.000. Harries.com slash JCE and you talk about things to make your money's worth. German engineered blades. And we know those Germans are some sadistic son of a bitches. They make blades sharper than a serpent's tooth. And you can sign up for the delivery options, the scheduled refills as low as a couple of dollars,

and all the other things that they provide here to make your face look somewhat palatable to the general public. Go to harries.com slash jCE. It's a $13 normal price on this trial set. You get for $3 for heaven's sake. It's a great deal. This is good stuff. And it's living, breathing proof of the old adage that if I had a face like that,

I'd take a donkey and shave its ass and teach it to walk backwards. It has nothing to do with that. It's perfect for you. You shave all the time. No one gets to see you with a beard or a mustache. Well, except for that one brief period of 91. Yes, only it was a rib on me. But it's because I need to keep myself in perfect working order

in case I need to be called upon to speak to the general public. But you know what, this razor is so good. Tony Atlas had to give up using this razor because when he shaved with it, his face was so soft and slick that when women would try to walk on it, they'd slip off and hurt themselves. He got sued three times. Well, I don't know about that, but I know about Harry's. And whether you're Harry or just don't want to be Harry, you can go to Harry's.

One more time, what's that promo code? It's harries.com, H-A-R-R-Y-S, Harries.com slash J-C-E to save these big bucks. And I wonder, did Harry invent this? Is this the Harry that used to be with Harry and David? They did fruit, now he's gone into shaving? We have not yet been able to determine. if there is an actual Harry or if Harry is supposed to be

because it's a play on the word Harry. Apocryphal. We don't know. So we are determined to find out in this ongoing series, the search for Harry's. The search for Harry. Right here.

Right here. Well, we got to go out from here. We did the promo code. So, uh... Yes, we did. I think we did. We did. I got to get all this stuff back in the box now.

All right. There it is, the Midnight Express action figures. will the Stan Lane figure come with a little wig that you could put on the figure for that? No, no, but we were thinking about including several very tiny bottles of baby oil, but we thought, well, no, we thought better of that. Well, Jim, of course, you are in a wonderful position because the members of the Cult of Cornet can go right to you, right to your website, write to Jimcornet.com, and get those figures. Bam, right there, right there. But a lot of people may be thinking, you know, this is a lot of good ideas. maybe I can create action figures of me and my friends or something.

Yes. You would need a website. You need a store. I mean, they should look at what you've done and kind of mimic that business model, right? Well, this is complicated. I mean, it's complicated. You know, you got to have the store.

You got to have the platform. You can't have the thing crashing on you as happened to me in a past. You can't have, you know, just all this chaos going on. You need people that know what they're doing with this thing. And not some fly-by-night operation. It's very complicated. It should not be left in the hands of amateurs. You need to go to professionals on this thing.

And that's why that we've said many times before, no matter what you're selling, even if you're selling like you're going to the electric chair, you need our friends at Shopify. Because shop us, no matter what you're selling at this time of year, maybe it's snow shovels. Maybe it's furry collars to go around your neck.

Maybe it's those giant Russian Cossack hats like Tony Con wears it media scrums to keep you warm in this cold environment this time no matter what you're selling. If it's pencils in a 10 cup or if it's Broadway tickets or if it's, who knows,

giant automobiles, build your own cars and sell them online, whatever you want to sell, our friends at Shopify can help you do it because they are the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business. No matter what stage of your business you're in, whether you're in the, oh my God, we're going broke stage or the, oh my God, we're making so much money. We've got to figure out a way

to cheat on our taxes stage. No matter what, Shopify can help you from start to finish, because as I mentioned, they are the global leader. There are no excuses business partner. It says that right here. No matter what goes wrong, they got no excuses for it. Well, no, that's not what it means. That's, what does it mean? There's no excuses. I got nothing. Sell without needing to code. Shut up now.

Because we got to do this. Sell without needing to code or design. Just sell the shit. People will run up and throw money at you when you get one of these platform stores here on Shopify. Just bring your best ideas, even your worst ideas. They can make anything happen. If you want to sell ostriches, they can figure out a way to make them. son of the bitches fly.

Let's see, that's not how it works. And first of all, I don't think it's legal to sell ostriches on online, on the web. Secondly, they're not going to- You got to do it in person? If you have a... I don't see a lot of door-to-door ostrich salesman. If you have a product that you have created or have the rights to sell, you can create an online store and they can help your commerce run freely or run well.

Freely? No, they're not going to make you give your shit away. They'll actually charge for it with shots. Shopify magic, you can whip up captivating content that... It never sounds real when you transition to Shopify magic. With Shopify magic, you can whip up captivating content that converts from blog post to product description. You can make shit and suddenly it'll just change into something else. It'll convert into a completely different thing.

Magic. You can generate instant. fact answers. The answers to all your facts, FAQ. Frequently asked questions. You can pick the perfect email send time. Apparently, if there's a time that's better than others for someone to receive your email,

then they'll just bring it then. And Shopify makes getting paid simple by instantly accepting every type of payment, every legal currency, coin of the realm, anywhere in the globe. will be accepted instantly. Legal tender. Any legal tender? Yes. And they'll give you the rubles and the rupees and the sharpies and the coins of various realms.

And then, you know, good luck taking that down to Walmart, though, those fucking rupees. They can't figure out a way to convert. But anyway, Shopify grows with your business no matter how far or big you grow. So no matter how fat and corpulent you get, they will still serve. you until the inevitable incomes and your arteries are all clogged up. So marketing is made simple by Shopify, removing

the guesswork with built-in tools. They send you an entire belt. You click it on and the tools are all built in right there where you can create, execute, and analyze. There's no bolt. Your online marketing campaigns if you execute something and it's

dead, I guess it's a post-mortem. You can create, execute, and post-mortem. Your online marketing campaigns, Shopify and I'll tell you what Brian it's cheap it's almost free like you said a minute ago

but they won't make you give your merchandise away for free they'll just almost give this away for free because you can sign up for a $1 a month trial period a dollar a month that's 3.3 cents per

day but good luck trying to cut that penny in thirds a dollar a month trial period at Shopify.com slash JCE. Now this is very important. The JCE must be entered in lowercase because they put that in capitals here.

That's why I know it's important. If you want to get this dollar a month trial period, Shopify.com slash lowercase, JCE, if you type it in capitals, not only will you not get the deal, but also something happens to your computer. I'm not sure what. Screen goes black.

You're not sure what because nothing happens to the computer. based on anything you just... Well, just follow my instructions if you want to be safe. Air on the side of caution. Shopify.com slash JCE to grow your business no matter what state you're in or stage you're in or county, country. I guess they're all over the world. Shopify.com slash JCE.

See, that's what's going to happen. Oh, boy. Every time, and you'll hear this in your sleep, folks, because they come and they install a loudspeaker in your home, so every time somebody buys something from you, you get the trademark cash register symbol, and you know you've made some money. But goddamn 24 hours a day at the fucking volume of a who concert, that'll start driving you to distraction. Shopify.

That's right. And who are you? Your slash JCE once again. Who the fuck are you? You know, if Rollins, if a bus came along and ran him over. and he was out for nine months tomorrow, I would put the thing up for the winner of the Royal Rumble. And let's increase all of the goddamn interest in whatever comes out of that.

It'd be a good business model. Like every three years you unify the titles and then you create a new world title in the next year. And then a few years later you unify it again. How about just to just recognize. We got too many of them. Because, you know, you can sell... A rain like Roman reigns is, no pun intended,

because it is the, not only the one title down deep in there somewhere, but the two that were featured for quite some time, and there was a big deal about unifying them. But then you can't make another one. And just, you know, that quickly and just expect that with no history and with no, you know, direct lineage besides kind of a, okay tournament on television, blah, blah, blah. You can't sell that to people.

These promos are selling tickets and they're selling pay-per-views or premium live events and they're selling interest in who these guys are and who they're fighting and what their personal reasons are because, as we know, personal issues draw money. But I really think that the business would be exactly the same. the revenue, really, if Seth was not being called a world champion and was just in the everything was happening in the mix that it's happening already. But I think it's going to be a long row to hoe, as Mama Cornett used to say, to sell that third world title in the fan's eyes.

I don't even know, Brian, if our friends at Shopify could sell that. Well, I think they could sell that or more appropriately help you sell that if you had that to sell. Well, I don't know because you might not be able to sell some things to some people and you can fool some of the people some of the time and all of the people all of the time, but you can't fool Shopify at all because if you can't sell with Shopify, well, you're just not a salesman. That's what they always say. Folks, they, who's they? Well, that's they. That's a people. And Shopify say that. They do not say that. You're not communicating with these people. Well, they've sent me an email. Did they say that?

well they said something like that but not that close enough anyway there's some level of disconnect here folks if you need a platform to sell something we talked about that earlier when i have the platform here to speak to you people and to sell the fine products at jimcordat dot com if you need a platform on which to sell your goods and services your merchandise the things that you make with the sweat of your brow and the toil of your tired fingers, and you need one of the global commerce platforms that is a leader that helps you sell at every stage of your business, from the launch your online shop stage all the way to the, we just hit a million orders stage, it's our friends at Shopify, because no matter what you're selling,

as long as it goes through certain FBI background checks and regulations, and is not explosive, corrosive, or conducive to the moral turpitude of the general public, Shopify will help you turn browsers into buyers with the Internet's best converting checkout. It's up to 36% better compared to other converting checkouts, apparently,

and you can sell more with less effort thanks to Shopify Magic, because once you you merely give your your soul over to Satan and dedicate yourself your black magic witchcraft No, no one's anything that black magic

Well once that you have had the seance and you've brought Shopify magic into your circle then you can sell things all the time with less effort because people will be under the spell of the magic power of Shopify you will take some wolf's bane and you will take some eyeballs of newt and mix them together,

and suddenly all your merchandise is flying off the shelves. And of course, we're speaking in purely positive, metaphorical phrases. So look at these and negate them. And there'll be no black magic. It'll be just magic. Wonderful, nice magic. Look at these and negate them. You have to believe that it's magic.

Don't let it stand in your way. No, don't let anything stand in your way of running now to Shopify.com because Shopify powers 10% of all the e-commerce in the United States and that other 90% well, they're giving them a lot of trouble because if they can't run the thing,

they'll tear it down. They are sabotaging those platforms left and right. If you're with one of the other platforms, you never know when Shopify's going to hit you with some kind of virus or some. They're taking all these people. No. That is not what they do.

There was no viruses. Again, Jim's just making up some stuff. What? Some stuff. Well, some of there's a grain of truth in here somewhere. No. Who said that? And we're going to find it.

Because Shopify's extensive help resources are there to support your success every step of the way. That's where you're going to find if you've got a problem, go to Shopify's help resources and they will find it because their resources are extensive. and they're there to support your success and cover their ass every step of the way. Because businesses that grow with Shopify if they're smart and they know what they're doing. Because you've got a nice business there. It'd be a shame if anything happened to it. And right now it's going to cost you almost nothing.

You can sign up for a $1 a month trial period. We're almost giving these things away anymore. Are these people paying us, Brian? How can they afford to? But anyway, go to Shopify.com slash JCE, and you're going to get a $1 a month trial period. Now, that's slash JCE that's all lowercase. That's important for some reason. We're not sure what.

But Shopify.com slash JCE, $1 a month trial period for a global e-commerce platform to set you up and be able to sell snow to Eskimos and, stink to skunks and anything else that you want to market. It doesn't even have to be good. It can be complete hogwash. They'll sell it for you. Because Shopify is going to make you money. They're not going to worry about whether your product

causes some type of testicular cancer in mice. Well, no. What? Shop of... Again, I don't know where you whip some of these out of. Well, you know, there's a lot of regulations these days. And just because something causes cancer, and mice is nuts.

Doesn't mean it's going to be bad for people. It doesn't mean we need the reference that during the spot about the wonderful people at Shopify and the wonderful service. They have nothing to do with mice's nuts. It's just an observation. It's an observation based on nothing. So we want to tell you about something

and that's Shopify. What's that promo code, Jim? JCE all lowercase. And did I mention? Did I mention? Hey! Yeah, the whole he-haw gang in there. It started out, fractured fairy tales, and then went to Dudley Do Right.

Well, Jim, before we get to the big 9 o'clock hour, or the main event or whatever the hell's going on on this show, I'm sure some of the fans, some of the fans, the tens of tens in the building, and the hundreds of thousands at home may have wanted to put some money on who they thought would win the big match tonight here on the big show. at the UNO Lakefront. No, actually, what they were looking for is they were looking for somebody they could pay to let them out early. Because I think that is AEW's next strategy. Let them all in free and charge them to get out.

But if you'd like to bet on whether that happens or not, or literally anything else going on in the world of wrestling or the world of professional sports or things and such, whatever they take bets on, well, Draft King's Sportsbook, they can fix you right up. you know the Super Bowl is coming up. Brian, you've heard about this. It's been in the papers. It's going to be a big deal this year, yeah.

Who's in it? The Kansas City Chiefs, led by Taylor Swift and Patrick Mahomes, against the San Francisco 49ers and the Joe Montana Bowl. Well, I'll tell you what, Taylor Swift, I believe, is going to kick the shit out of them people. And you can place a wager on it because Draft King's Sportsbook is the official sports betting partner of the Super Bowl, they've done 58 Super Bowls now. Holy, that's even more than they've done

WrestleMania's. But right now, if you know who's going to win or think you know who's going to win or you just bet on both teams, that way you're guaranteed to win something. Well, no, you're not allowed to make any suggestions to how the listener should bet. We could talk about the fact that they can go there

and pick and choose, but we can't tell them. If they want to, if they want to bet on something, We're allowed to tell them. I'm not telling them how to bet. I'm suggesting that if you bet on both teams, that would almost guarantee that you'd win something, wouldn't it? Can they go to a draw in the Super Bowl? There's got to be a loophole somewhere here, folks,

or some here where folks, but regardless, if you bet on the big game right now and you're a new customer to draft kings, you bet $5, you get $200 instantly in bonus bets. That's just, that's crazy. So right now if you download the Draft King Sportsbook app, use the code JCE and go to place a wager on the big Super Bowl, whether you want Taylor Swift to win or you want the miners from 49er to win or whoever you want to win. Or like I said, bet on both and you're going to win something. Well, then you can bet $5 and get $200 instantly in bonus bets. Use the code JCE and make the crown.

yours. Do you think, does Taylor Swift wear a crown? No, but she is the reigning queen of pop. Well, Michael Jackson will have something to say about that. Well, he's not alive. He can't be the queen of pop anymore. Well, in that case, he'll say something about it in the afterlife. He can be the queen of soda. He can be the queen of shampoo. You know, if they'd come up with a good anti-inflammatory shampoo for people with head fucking trauma from severe,

Burns, Michael Jackson would have been the perfect spokesperson. But nevertheless, now going back to this, download the draft game sports book. Yeah, let's go back to this. Yeah, good idea. Now, what now, and use the code JCE. Bet $5, get $200 in bonus bets, bet on the big game, the Super Bowl, and whoever you want to win, and just put the fix in

with the gangsters that you know in your neighborhood. and everything will turn out fine. And just in case you got a gambling problem, call 1-800 gambler or in West Virginia, visit www.1-800 gambler.net in New York. Call 878-8-8-Hope-N-Y or text Hope NY. 4-6-7-369. In Connecticut, help is available.

A lot of people need it up there for problem gambling. Call 888-789. Now, that makes it sound like if you want problem gambling, and call. If you need help for problem gambling, call 888-78-9-77- sounds like a slot machine. Or visit ccpg.org. I thought that was the former Soviet Union. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Resort in Kansas, we thank you. 21 plus age varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. Bonus bets it expire. 168 hours after issuance, how many days is that?

I don't fucking know. See dkng.com slash football for eligibility and deposit restrictions, terms, and responsible gaming resources. I thought that was a fashion website, DKNG. Make women's purses and apparel. No, that's DK and why. Oh, why not G? I don't know. No, that's it.

Why, not G? All right, G. Well, let's, uh, we're talking about Draft Kings once again. How can the listeners get their, uh, Jim Cornett assisted help from Draft Kings. Cornett, Cornett assisted help back using, by using the code JCE is what they need to do. And then we go to J.D. Funco versus the Ms. and I'll skip ahead and be the spoiler.

JD's about put Ms. away, but Truth comes out and starts throwing out all the T-shirts that he found for free to the people. And then they have more match. And finally, Our Truth is there and hands J.D. about 10 grand. Now, where do you get this money when he was just throwing them out to people at random when he came out? But now he's got this giant stack of $100 bills that he's picked up wherever the fuck.

And as he hands JD the 10 grand or whatever it is, Ms. hits his finish from behind one, two, three. Money goes flying in the air. Money goes flying in the air. And again, I remain pissed off that not a motherfucker went for a grab for one of those bills. And it looks like $10,000. But for me, for $198 of $1 bills, to get sucker punched in Memphis that night.

And so truth, it's, yes, I understand what you say he's good at what he does. If you're going to do complete Gilligan's Island type comedy where nothing can be taken seriously, he's doing it well, but it just makes everybody involved look like complete idiots,

doesn't it? In the judgment day. again they've become kind of an afterthought rhea hasn't but her segments now are just really about ria dealing with nia jacks or becky or whoever she shows up every now and then in the back for these judgment day things and then she's busy doing other things and she was the biggest star in that group yeah i mean maybe what would help them would be a good night's sleep you know i never thought of it that way but maybe if they if they laid their head down and got a good night sleep, they could dream about something to make people take them a little more seriously

and start doing that. You know, as a matter of fact, if you go right now, folks, to helixleep.com, that's where you got to go, helixleksleep.com, you're going to find out that not only do they have mattresses for people who like sleep on their side or on their back or on their stomach or big and tall people are portly and stout and morbidly obese people or children or amputees. They've got mattresses for everybody. Mattresses for everybody. We don't need to distinguish who everybody is. We got to name all these subgroups because people give you a shout out to people out there, the sick and shut-ins, people that need the mattresses the most. They can't get out to a normal

mattress store and hop up and down and test out the mattresses. If you're sick and shut-in on a mattress at home, you need another mattress delivered to your home. Or if you're like one of the people we were talking about before and you need to think seriously when you're asleep, go to helixleep.com right now and pick out one of the mattresses for people who like to think seriously when they sleep. Because Helix has all these kind of mattresses. They've got the Helix Elite Collection. The Elite is, I was thinking luxurious, I was thinking high-priced, I was thinking high-priced, I was

thinking Supreme, but I didn't think about Elite because it has negative connotations around the wrestling industry, but they have the Elite collection over at Helit and Hillie. And Helit, yes. She's a wonderful lady. That includes six different mattress models, each tailored for specific sleep positions and firmness preferences. So if you're a serious sleeper, just put that down on the little quiz.

let's say you want to be able to what kind of dreams do you want to have you take a quiz and they'll ask you things like this how do you sleep what position you like soft or firm are you corpulently morbidly obese or are you a little skinny skeletal person how much stuffing do we have to put in this thing that kind of question are you a skeletal person

yes really okay a very bony person doesn't need as much stuffing see but if you're a big fat son of a bitch then they got to put more stuffing in or you'll wear down into it'll look like fucking you know Mrs. Bates's mattress at the fucking Bates motel so they got to put extra stuffing in for fat people

again the point is no matter who you are a mattress for fat people is like a private plane for fat people when they're getting on the airplane they ask how much do you weigh so we can figure out how much fuel to put in you just Just fill it up. Again, they have mattresses for everybody, no matter who you are, your age, your weight, anything. Yes.

Great mattresses. Don't worry about what they're going to put in it in. They're going to take care of you and what you need on your mattress. They get a good night's sleep. Isn't that right, Jim? You know, there's asbestos in some mattresses. There's no, no. There's none of that in Hewix sleep.

There truly is. The people at Helix told me some of these mattress companies, they put asbestos and shit in there. There's nothing like that. Helix never said that to you and there's no expect that none of that in the healing sleep management. No, it's on it's been in the news. It's been in the news you may have seen on social media or in the news recently. There's been a number of health issues and lawsuits related to

oh it's fiberglass. I thought it's asbestos. Well nevertheless whether you do you want to sleep on fiberglass or asbestos either one? No, you don't. Well, Helix doesn't have that because they manufacture everything here in America. Where we, do you want to sleep on fiberglass or asbestos? We've got good old-fashioned American-made toxic waste that gives you all kinds of cancers. Once again, let's talk about these fine mattresses and not have to worry about any of these other things. These mattresses, you can get a good night rest and a good night's sleep and just a nap. Whenever you need it, it's there.

Yes. Or if you need your mattress for something else, if you're one of the few of us that have happy marriages, then you might need your mattress for something else. You know, they say many people say that they experience more pleasant, relations on a helix sleep mattress than the other mattresses because there's not that fiberglass they're not cutting their knees and elbows again this is not necessarily a statistic we have so let's not quote a statistic it's anecdotal it's anecdotal okay Colin uh anecdotally why don't we talk about where people can get these fine mattresses anecdotally you can go to and your pet can sleep on the

mattresses oh you don't get one of the kids mattress for your for your pets your dogs or cats because kids and the dogs, they're about the same size. Dogs are nicer and they don't cause less trouble. Well, again, no, but... But that way, your pet would be sleeping on the same thing you're sleeping on, and there would be a bond amongst the family. But right now, what you can do? To do all of these things and not sleep with your face buried in a big fucking bunch of

asbestos is go right now to helixleep.com slash JCE and use the code You may need to write this down. I'll wait until you get a pen and a piece of paper. Now, use the code Helix Partner 20, H-E-L-I-X, Partner 20. Some people spell Partner P-A-R-D-N-E-R. Did you know that? You know, partner. But it's actually Partner, because you're nerd to their parts.

That's where the root of the terminology comes from. So HelixPartner 20 at HelixSleep.com slash JCE, you're going to get 20% off all the mattresses and two free pillows. And I believe if you order two mattresses, you would get four free pillows. And, well, you'd get 20% off each mattress, which would total 40%. So it'll go up exponentially for there.

I think by the time you order five mattresses, you're getting them all for free and 10 pillows. So you can start your own flop house. Did I do that math right? You got to order five mattresses to get the 10 free pillows and to get it 100% free of charge of any cost to you. I don't think you've done any of this right. Because each one is 20% off and two free pillows.

Once again, Jim, how can the listeners get this great mattress that after all the fun and games of Jim Cornett, they may need a good night rest if they have a co-host who's giving them heart palpitations. where can they go to get this fine mattress? That's helix sleep.com slash JCE and use the code Helix Partner 20 and you'll be a partner of Helix, whether you're 20 years old or not.

Jim, that was the WrestleMania kickoff and hopefully they do more events like that in the future. Great energy, exciting. Everyone was talking about it. It did great numbers on YouTube live, I think a few hundred thousand people watching it just there, not even on peacock.

And then the video of some of the important stuff was up over a couple of million by the next day. Yeah, they did a great job leaning into this, the big pivot. And speaking of big pivots, we're going to pivot right now to real time. Because right now in the real world, Jim Cornett, you've launched a new line of action figures. They are on sale. We're talking commerce. We're talking sales. Maybe other people want to launch something and have some help for commerce and sales.

and website and other words. Words and phrases. Jim, our friends at Shopify could be the help for many people. Yes, shopper. If you need help, ladies and gentlemen, and many of you do, then Shopify can help you out.

You know, can you imagine if instead of putting this WrestleMania kickoff on all these other platforms, they put it on Shopify and they sold it? Well, they'd have made a million dollars right there. More than a million dollars. Well, that's not necessarily. it's not a pay-per-view closed-circuit kind of thing.

Well, Shopify can sell anything. They're the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business. Because, you know, you've got with the e-commerce and the global commerce and the Commerce Bank of Beverly Hills, you've got commerce going on all over the place these days. And Shopify have carved out their corner of it. They are now leading, powering, if you will, 10% of all the e-commerce. in the United States. Were you aware of that? That's an amazing figure. It's right here in the copy.

Yes, it's amazing that I can read this. And not only that, but over in the Antilles, the Netherlands Antilles, they are about 2%, but they're gaining ground fast over the Dutch tulip merchants that have held sway over there for quite some time. That is not in the copy, ladies gentlemen, but that 2% does not. Well, but you know, hey, what's better than roses on a piano, tulips on an organ? And I'll tell you this, folks, Shopify's extensive help resources. Who would have thought it was the Dutch tulip merchant? Shopify's extensive help resources are there.

Yes, they are, ladies and gentlemen, and so is the Tea Time Movie Lady. To support your success every step of the way when you are launching your business or when you're expanding your business or when you're ready to retire and give this thing to your kids to fuck it all to hell. Shopify will be right there with you every step of the way. They'll help you build it, they'll help you maintain it,

and they'll help your kids fuck it up. So folks, and right now, it's never been less expensive. I can't say cheap, because that applies flimsyness and lack of reliability, and that's the furthest thing from the Shopify platforms that you're going to find that are supporting your business, selling your goods and services. I mean, you know, there's some people out there

just don't have the selling ability. They need Shopify's help. You get people couldn't sell pussy on a troop train. But here with Shopify, you could open the biggest little whorehouse in Texas. So right now... And take it onto the tracks, apparently. And your steam engine would come ride the little train.

It's rolling down the tracks to the jails. junction, you can right now sign up for a $1 a month trial period at Shopify.com slash JCE all lowercase in the JCE. If it's only a dollar a month for heaven's sake, well, then that's going to raise your bottom line exponentially because a dollar is the next best thing to almost nothing. It's a dollar away from nothing at all. Why would that be the next best thing? That could be actually the next big hit, a dollar away from.

from nothing at all. Oh. That sounds like a country song. A smile is the best uniform you can wear. Well, that's what they say up north when your internet is out. But go to Shopify.com slash JCE right now, dollar a month trial period. Grow your business no matter what state you're in or stage you're in. I'm sorry.

My stage is I need new glasses. Well, whatever stage or state you're in, look at the state of you at this state. stage of the game. Shopify. It's going to make you money, honey. That's what we want. Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na. All right, Kaching.

Shopify, the official Shopifying partner of the Jay Quartet's drive-through. If you want to Shopify, then no one will Shopify better than Shopify. We didn't even talk about not just selling your own stuff

anymore but selling other people's stuff but I don't think if we only had time. There's another lint episode of AEW Dynamite. One that their fans were raving about. Dave gave four and a half stars to a few of the matches there. Dave gave four and a half stars to the lowest rated segment of the program. And said Jericho should win more. Yeah, that would have saved it. See, all those people tuned out because they got a fucking premonition Jericho was going to lose. The thing that's hurting AEW is Chris Jericho not being presented strong.

strongly enough. That's, of all the things, that's what's hurting AEW right now. But, Brian, you know what the people at 10.04 p.m. Eastern Standard time in the United States of America were ready to do after they watched that television program, don't you? Turn on the Channel 11 news and see what the weather is with Mr. G. Well, it depends on what part of the country you live in, because I don't get your Channel 11. I get my Channel 11, and we don't have a Mr. G or a Master G. But I'll tell you what we do have. We do have a fine night sleep for everybody listening out there if you get a Helix sleep mattress. That's what we've got because if you watch AEW on television, if you manage to take toothpicks and prop your eyelids open until the end of the thing,

you're going to want something soft and comfortable and warm and inviting and just neighborly to just fall right into and go into snooze land, into slumber town. Take the midnight train to somnambulism. Was that a Gladys Night and the Pips hit, or did I remember wrong? The midnight train to somnambulism. Where in Georgia is that? It's on the other side of Peachtree City.

But anyway, folks, I'll tell you what. No other mattress company can compare to our friends at Helix Sleep, and I'll tell you why. And you may be surprised to hear this, because Brian was, as a matter of fact, Brian accused me of manufacturing fictitious facts. All these fictive facts, I said, Jim. Fictitious factoids about these issues, you did not believe

that some of these outlaw mud show mattress companies out there are putting fiberglass in their mattresses. You tried to stop me. You said, no, no, that can't possibly be. I said, you are incorrect. sir. Yes, sir. Some of these fly-by-night. You never know these seedy, you know, mom and pop manufacturing outlets that make the mattresses. They know, the pop makes them and mom carries them on her back down the street. They're putting fiberglass. I wouldn't be surprised if also I thought

it was asbestos, and they may have done that too. As a matter of fact, a lot of these mattress companies, ladies and gentlemen, you may not be aware of this either, just like Brian was completely ignorant of these facts, a lot of these mattress companies out there will just go up and down the side of the interstate and find things to pick up and stuff in their mattresses. You could be getting spare car parts and pieces off a goddamn 18 wheelers and semi-trucks. You could be getting discarded fucking dead pets. We should remind everyone, this is not what you will get from Helix Sleep. You get the finest mattresses and we can't confirm that any other companies using these

items that you are listening. Well, we can't confirm it, but where does all that shit from the side of the road go? You see, the prisoners pick it up, but you never see it again. It's going in these mattresses from these other companies. That's why you can only trust Helix. You don't want to be sleeping on a mattress containing a radiator from a 57 Chevy or the potentially, possibly the bones or the desiccated corpse of somebody's pet poodle. You never know what you'll find on the side of the road, folks, but you know what you won't find, and that's a Helic sleep mattress, because people, you know when you're driving down the road, Brian, I don't know if you live in this type of neighborhood. As you're driving down the road, you're going to see a lot of mattresses laying

on the side of the road. A lot of couches, a lot of love seats, occasionally some kind of kitchen cabinetry and mattresses people get rid of. They're too big to put your garbage cans, so you just leave them on the side of the road. These are never helix sleep mattresses. Because nobody that gets a helix sleep mattress wants to let go of it. Even if, if grandpa dies on a helix sleep mattress and the stench of his grizzly death is still on it, let's not, no. Most people are just going to spray that dangum thing with some fucking fibrose and put some sheets back on it because it's a helix and it's good.

I don't even know where to begin with this one. Most people would not do any of that. Helix sleep is good for the whole family, whether it's grandpa or the kids or you. But everybody's time's got to. But everyone dies. But everyone dies and people die in all sorts of places. So technically it could be on the most comfortable mattress ever. But you don't have to worry about that.

Just go to sleep and enjoy a good night's sleep. I see he's on mute when Helix sleep. Yes. Just go to, don't worry about anything. just go to sleep. You'll know if you wake up. It'll be a new tomorrow. Folks,

just go now. Where should you go? I can't find it. Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Just go to sleep. Go to sleep. Go to sleep, little.

Go to Helix sleep. That's H-E-L-I-X. Helix Sleep.com slash JCE and use the code Helix Partner 20 Helix Partner 20 and you're going to get 20% off all mattress orders and two free

pillows. If you go to Helixleep.com slash JCE EJ. Yeah, lady. Lady. Helix. Helix sleep.com.

I'm going to do it slash JCE and use the code Helix partner 20. You'll get 20% off the orders and two free pillows. And I'm crying. I need to wipe my face. Well, wipe your face and, of course, go to bed with Helix Sleep. Go to sleep and don't worry about a thing. You might wake up. And you'll be waking up.

Potentially on a Helix sleep mattress. Once again, what's that promo code gym? Oh, God damn it. Helixleaf.com slash JCE. Use the code Helix partner 20. I think my nose is bleeding. Well, wipe off that blood and go to sleep with Helix sleep. You don't buy that Goethe can recover from chopping the ring pose

and having his hand worked on by a weasley heel, but you can buy that Kenny Omega can get stabbed in the head with a screwdriver by Will Osprey and recovered a wrestle 8 to 10 more minutes and win for a six star match. You got stamp with a screwdriver. That was okay.

Goethe chopped the post. Got compared to wrestling for 50 years ago. Oh, God. Well, you know, Jim, maybe Dave just needs a good night's sleep. I'm not sure, Brian. I don't know if Dave is one of these people who might be in a standing coma

and can't really wait. up. But folks, if you're out there in the real world dealing with reality, you need a good night's sleep to recharge yourself and rest yourself for the burdensome day ahead as we exist on this spinning blue marble, hurtling through space, through the atmosphere. You know what you want to lay down at night on and forget about all of that? Forget about the fact that we're someday going to crash into a comet or a meteor and the whole thing's going to go kaput like the dinosaurs, forget about all that. Lay down, rest your weary bones, and get a night of restful, peaceful sleep, slumber

on a helix sleep mattress. That's the thing you got to do. Because, I mean... That is the thing you have to do, yes. No matter what you're worried. No matter what is this dwelling on your mind, when you lay down, it's like a heaviness on you and you look up and you go high, heaviness. You're with me again.

But if you lay down on something comfortable like a helix, sleep mattress, you don't have that thought. Instantly, your thoughts leave you. It's like you've been shot up with some exotic drug made from a tizi flies blood, and you just drift off into a cloud on a helic

sleep mattress, and they got all kinds. We've talked about the different makes and models, the various things that they do for you. If you sleep hot, they cool you now. You know, Stace got one of those. Said, we've got to try this. And I sat down on this thing. I

It just cools you. No more are you going to wake up in a puddle of sweat looking like David Jansen and the fugitive? No. Because this thing naturally cools you right down. And they've also, I think they have a heat up. I'm not sure about this, but I think they've got one.

If you plug it in, if you get cold at night, like if you've got poor blood circulation, plug this bad boy in, it's like a griddle. You'll feel like a pancake. It slightly burns your buns. But nevertheless, you'll wake up in the morning, all ready to go out and look like you have a pulse.

And they've got 20 unique mattresses, including the award-winning Lux Collection, the newly released Helix Elite Collection, and of course that mattress for all of you unnaturally long or ridiculously corpulently fat sleepers. The Helix Elite Collection is good for people who don't want to sell. That's true. But at the same time,

the people that deliver the mattress will have to super kick you for you to accept delivery of the elite collection. And if your spine, listen to this, if your spine is a problem, every helix mattress, Brian, I don't know if you knew this, has a hybrid design. They combine individually wrapped steel coils in the base with premium foam layers on top. So you got comfort and support. With the steel coils, there is the risk of electrocution. during thunderstorms. So as soon as you hear a rumble of thunder,

get the fuck away from this thing, but once that the weather has passed, you can lay back down without being jolted like you're sitting an old sparky at San Quentin. All you got to do, folks, is go right now to HelixSleep, H-E-L-I-X, helix-Sleep.com slash J-C-E, and you're going to use the code Helix Partner 20

because when you take the little two or three minute quiz, tell them how you like your mattresses, how you like to sleep, what you want to do, what you don't want to do. I believe they also have a mattress for premature ejaculators. That may still be in development.

They don't. No, they don't, and they won't be in development, no. But, well, it's, they can't reveal these things to the general public. There's industrial espionage. But anyway. Industrial espionage over the rest, really. Yeah, and if you're a Darby Allen fan, then they have a mattress filled entirely with broken shards of glass.

Well, nonetheless, they don't have that either. What they have are the most comfortable mattresses. Maybe you need something firm. Maybe you need something a little mushy. Whatever it may be. Helix has it. What's that from? That's their pudding collection.

The pudding collection. The pudding collection is nice. You'll just feel like you're sleeping in jello. But right now, if you go to helixleep.com slash JCE, use the code, Helix Partner 20, you're going to get 20% off all of the mattress orders and two free pillows. How in the world are you going to beat that offer? Helixleep.com slash JCE. Use the code Helix partner 20, 20% off all mattresses and two free pillows.

And again, no matter what you want to lay down on. Just again, if you're an AEW fan and you want one wrapped and barbed wire, They might be able to do that in the elite collection, but you're going to get 20% off, regardless of who you're a fan of, as long as you're a fan of ours. As long as you know who we are, that's all that matters.

And get one of those kids' mattresses too for the dog. Get all the mattresses you and your family would need from Helix Sleep one more time. What's that promo code, Jim? Well, it is the promo code is Helix Partner 20, Brian. I've mentioned that numerous. time we will we're going to keep up on the TNA legal updates or TNA Jesus Christ that it seems like that's what it seems well we're going to keep up with the AEW MDAs and legal updates

good Lord but that that's the point Brian is if if you have if you go to a show now and you have any kind of complaint against AEW or Tony Khan you can pretty much go home and sleep like a baby. Because you're going to be farting through silk pretty soon. You're going to be a millionaire. You're going to be rolling and dough because he'll pay you

whatever it takes for you to sign that NDA. So sleep like a baby, people. But you know what, Brian? If you can't figure out a way to lodge any kind of frivolous complaint about AEW and Tony Con to get those millions of dollars to sleep like a baby,

you're going to have to do it the old-fashioned way. you're going to have to be on a comfortable surface in which you can sleep like the aforementioned infant. And that's where our folks and our friends at Helix Sleep come in. And I think we need to go no further than just to mention that they offer 20 unique mattresses including the award-winning Lux Collection. So you will have 20 mattresses to choose from folks when you go to helixleep.com. based on your preferences, the way you like to sleep, whether you want to be face down,

whether you want to be face up, or whether you want to be side to side and front and back, how about in a good 69 position? They have mattresses for everything. They will, and as a matter of fact, Brad, we've talked about this before. There is no asbestos and fiberglass. There's no fiberglass.

Other mattress companies use fiberglass as a flame retardant. hardened. None of that in these mattresses. And you will not have asbestos, and you will not have barbed wire, you won't have thumbtacks or broken glass or any, even shattered tempered glass. Not in a helix mattress, pure straw and duck feathers, America, off the backs of American ducks, by God, and these goddamn ducks that they plucked these feathers off of, the stuff in these mattresses, were forced to serve two years in the U.S. military. So they're true. No, there's no duck forage of military service or anything like that. Well, that's what I was told.

We don't know anything about the ducks. Now you're talking about ducks. You don't know anything about where they get their stuff. They're all American ducks. You're not sending your money to fucking foreign menace ducks here when you go to Helix. And folks, again, the 10 to 15 year manufacturers warranties depending on the model that you get, but most of you're not going to live that long, so you won't have dick to complain about. And if you're 50 right now in 15 years,

you're going to be shitting in this mattress inadvertently over the course of the night anyway. So what the fuck are you going to complain about? You're good for the rest of your life with one of these things. And did I mention no hazardous material? And they've got kids mattresses specially designed with the kids in mind. So it's kind of like, you know, they've got one that's kind of like a bouncy house. You take your kid, throw him about three feet in the air, he hits this thing. Boom, he'll bounce up and hit the same.

ceiling. That's not advisable and there's no guarantees of how far anyone, anyone will bounce and you're not supposed to bounce people off the mattress. Well, if they're, they're easier to bounce if they're under six. But these are designed for children three to 12 years old. They're designed for sleep. Let's be specific. Yes, well, you know, I'll tell you what, one good bump on the head at that age, you'll sleep all night. But folks right now- But these beds are so wonderful you will get zero bumps on your bump card if you sleep with Helix sleep. well they're not beds they're mattresses you don't need a bed to sleep on a mattress if a lot of you people out there if you're listening to us but you're not doing well and you don't have any furniture in your house hey that's the way randy savage used to live back when he was a starving wrestler just put the mattress right down on the floor because if it's a helix it'll make the floor feel good and you'll float away into dreamland and that's probably what's contributing to your lack of fucking furniture because you're sleeping so much you're not going out and getting a job and working to pay for these things so that you can and how are you going to pay for the helix

mattress with genuine american duck feathers you better pay but i'll save you money because right now helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners we don't need to tell you anymore about the mattresses they're the most comfortable thing they've even got one that'll cool you down it's it's like you just pulled it out of a cooler out of a freezer out of an ice chest, out of an ice box, out of an ice flow. It's cool to the touch. So when you lay on it, fuck your body temperature drops 10, 12 degrees. It does not. That would certainly be unhealthy and it would advise to say these things that are not true. You don't sweat when you sleep overnight. You don't even realize when you're waking up. You're numb completely because of the cold.

No, you are not. It is not that cold. It is just a proper amount of chill like you turns you pillow over, and of course you will wake up with the normal temperature of the house and the room and everyone else there, but with a little bit of chill, the right amount, they don't guarantee anything, but they have just the right amount of coldness. But not, you have no numbness, no extremity issues, no frostbite or anything else to worry about with Heelix Sleep. Well, folks, if you'd like to be cooler than the other side of the mattress, go to HeelickSleep.com. slash jCE and use the code helix partner 20. Helix partner 20 is the code.

Helixleep.com is the website slash JCE is the slash. And this is the best offer yet and it won't last long, especially if we keep doing spots like this. So do it now. Before you forget about it, sleep good like a good cult member should on a helic sleep mattress and float into a cloud of ecstasy. Oh, boy. Well, you know, Brian, if only there was some way that Tony Kahn could save some money.

Because, oh, it's, it's, it's spin, spin, spin. That's all, it's all going out. It's not coming in. It's, he's, he's, he's, he's pooping more than he's eating. That's not healthy. Because sooner or later, you'll run out of poop. I'll tell you what, folks, if you want to keep talking about. Think about it.

If you poop more than you eat sooner or later, it's bad news. You're expunging more than you're intaking. Isn't that impossible then? Well, that's another reason why it would be bad. Folks, I'll tell you what. See, there's all kinds of you're proving my point. But if there was some way that Tony could save some money, I got an idea. A man like him, successful businessman,

he's always making deals, he's always talking to the announcers about making matches. He's always on the phone. I bet you that Tony Kahn, thanks to those people at Big Wireless, while he's paying a fortune for his phone plan, his cell phone plan, his talk plan, his text plan, his data plan,

all the plans he's got. Hey, beyond that, all of his employees, all the employees of the Jaguar, the team probably picks up the bill for their corporate cell phone. There you go. That's a lot of money. That's a ton of money. Can you imagine?

Because a lot of these bills, they're $100, $100 a month or more. Well, imagine that times 10 or 20 or 50 or 100. Why, you see Tony could literally make a profit on AEW right now by having all of his employees and related Hoy-Paloys switching over to Mint Mobile because Mint Mobile offers premium wireless for $15 a month. And it's not just where you can talk on the phone. Oh, no, Contrere. You can actually text with this thing.

You know, like the kids do with their thumbs. They type onto the phone, and at the other end of it, people get a written message. You can be a part of that now, ladies and gentlemen, with Mint Mobile. And there's something called high-speed data. I'm not sure what the data is on, whether it's a dossier,

an individual stolen from the FBI or whether they're just telling you what the weather report is, but if you want data, they'll give it to you quick. High speed. And it's the nation's largest 5G network. What is that, Brian?

What does the G's... Is that a five-gig network? Is this where the gigs come in? That is where a gig comes in. That and John Moxley's forehead. Well, see, they've got five of them. Moxley has more than that. Folks, with Mint Mobile, you can choose from a three-month plan, a six-month plan, or a 12-month plan,

and say goodbye to your monthly phone bill and say hello to, I guess, a phone bill that comes every three, six or 12 months. But you say goodbye, I say hello. Because at Mint Mobile, they give you the best rate whether you're buying for one or a family. Remember the family plan starts at two lines. So I guess that could be for your significant other. Maybe you're a single parent. And your family only consists of two people. You get a phone for both of you.

But if you're not limited at two, you can get like if you have the Brady bunch, you can get 18 phones. For the listeners having affairs, this is a wonderful way to get your mistress. A custom number, a custom phone, a new phone line, something you'll pay for,

something I'm trying to say. There you go. A mint mobile mistress. There you go. Folks, if you sign up right now for $15 a month, you get premium wireless and a regular blowjob on the side. Well, no, you can't guarantee

that now you're going too far. We could joke about it, but you can't get to see that. You might have to take Mint Mobile to dinner first. And you can use your own phone number with any Mint mobile plan. Keep that same phone number and the same phone. You actually get nothing. They just tell you, go ahead and do everything you've been doing. We'll take care of everything else. But it's a great deal. Well, of course it is because it's just 15 bucks a month. Your first three months of premium wireless service starting at just $15 a month are available now. and you can get the plan shipped to your door for free. They'll write out the whole plan,

send it to you, and you can read it and take it from there. Mintmobile.com slash JCE. If you sign up for your first three months, is going to be $15 a month. Mintmobile.com slash JCE. Additional taxes, fees, and restrictions may apply, but some of the rules don't apply to you. See Mint Mobile for details.

That's right. See Mint Mobile for details. They support us. You should support them. One more time. What's that promo code? Well, we're supporting all of each other. Mintmobile.com slash JCE for the incredible financial deal that can save Tony Con from bankruptcy and ruin. You'd hate to see a man like that out on the street selling pencils on the corner. Imagine the hero he would be to his father if he came into the office one day, into the boardroom and said, Dad, it's so nice to see you here on shore once again, I have in my hand documentation I could save us millions of dollars with Mint Mobile.

But then he'd say to him, he'd say, but son, you said you were going to run this big wrestling company and all you're doing is spending your inheritance. Why should I believe you now? Dad, I'm doing my best. There it is, Jim, your annual conversation with Evan Husty talking about the upcoming season of Dark Side of the Ring. a season that once again you will be featured on at least a few times. A few times. You know, it's a shame

with all the things going on with the corporate structure at Vice. They got some fine programs over there at the TV outlet. Maybe Brian, I'm asking you, should they sell the TV programs on the Vice TV branch there on Shopify?

Where they'd make money instead of losing money because Shopify is the big e-commer global platform that you can just make money hand over fist if you're selling your products on on Shopify. Right. I mean, all their shows are dark side of the ring and then shows about cooking with weed. So I'm not sure how much of a market there'll be for some of that stuff.

But if you are someone who has maybe not programming, but your own products or things you have the rights to sell, Shopify is the perfect partner for your online store. Well, go ahead. You don't even need rights. Apparently, you can curate products to. sell from the other brands that you love at Shopify Collective, so you can basically sell other people's stuff. It says right here you don't have to sell just your own stuff anymore. Just willy-nilly sell shit out from under people.

Guy comes home from work, opens his front door. He got no furniture in his house. You know why? Because you sold it on Shopify. No, that's exactly not why. No, there will be no stolen merchandise or furniture sold on Shopify. Nobody saw him steal it. Let's not encourage people to sell stolen. and couches or any other things that they lifted. Well, and the problem is the shipping also, but I'll tell you what,

Shopify is your no-excuses business partner. When you fuck up, they got no excuses for it. They'll bury you. But you can sell without needing to know coding or design. You just bring your ideas, and Shopify will take it from there and make a ton of money with your ideas and give you some of it.

And Shopify can help you custom your online store to your style with gorgeous, flexible templates that are also hot as well as flexible. And with Shopify Magic, you can whip up captivating content that converts. It changes into all different types of things. Metastasizes, I believe, is the official term. And once you start selling Shopify makes getting paid simple, but they accept every type of payment. And some, you know, let's say somebody runs up a little short that month. they can't pay. Well, they'll send you over to your house. They'll send them over to your house to do

some work to kind of work it off at a barter system. That's not what they'll do. They accept every type of, well, these people are going to pay up one way or the other. Do you want to make money or what? Let's focus on that. Making money with Shopify, a wonderful partner, a wonderful friend of the show. No one's coming to anyone's house. I don't think there'll be these accounting issues that you're speaking of. I mean, you know, you can be optimistic, but everyone's in a while some of these things happen but shopify grows with your business no matter how far or big you grow you will not get away from them no matter how far you go how big you get they're going to keep an eye on you they've got an endless integration list they're apparently integrated fully

with third party apps endlessly endlessly thanks to an endless list of integrations and third party apps they'll do all these things oh from on-demand printing to accounting to chat bots they've got chat bots how do they have a list that doesn't end well you'd never know really where to start and where to wind up do you you start where you start

that's like that's like giving somebody directions and say go down to the last stop sign and turn left how do you know it's the last stop sign do you want marketing made simple Shopify removes the guesswork that's why we're sitting here guessing what the fucking answers to things. But they've got built-in tools

that help you create, execute, and analyze your online marketing campaigns. And they've got a single dashboard where you can manage your orders, your shipping, your payments from anywhere, and your speed as well as... And meet lots of singles. You can meet lots of singles

because it's a single dashboard. No married people are involved in that, right? That's just for... the singles. Would you like to know how much this service costs, Brian? I'm dying to know. Almost nothing. Right now, you can sign up for a $1 a month trial period at Shopify.com slash

JCE, the JCE, all lowercase, that continues to be an issue. I don't know why. Shopify.com slash JCE to grow your business no matter what stage you're in by signing up for a $1 a month trial, a dollar or a dollar or a dollar or a dollar. a month. That's 3.3 cents per day. You can afford that by rummaging around in the couch. So if you want to retire early and be able to leave your wife and get a pretty one and be able to send your kids to college to get rid of them, make money now with Shopify.com slash JCE. Maybe not the proper motivation for the listeners, but if you just want to have a good business and

support your family. You want to hire a hitman and just... No, let's not say that. Let's not say that. Unless it's Brett the Hitman heart for a personal appearance. Yes, and then see, you can sell personal appearances on Shopify. Will you stop hitting that? Well, it's because of all the money we're making.

All right, Shopify, J-C-E... Yeah. Not capitalized. Perhaps someone watched this episode of Darkside, and they said, Ew, and they wanted to call someone up and spread the disgust. You probably need a good... You probably need a good phone plan. You probably need a good plan for a good segue.

I'll tell you, if you want to get on the telephone and call somebody, about what are the new nominees to the Hall of Fame or anything like that, you can't get on your telephone and call somebody unless you got a phone plan that you can rely on and that you can afford. Brian, I think those are two things that we can all agree on. You've got to be able to rely on something. You've got to be able to afford it.

Well, Mitt Mobile has got both. Not only have they got the nation's largest 5G network. There are 5,000 of these networks, and they've got the biggest. Five grand, right? 5G. The big five. Well, it's not grand. It's five gigs, I guess.

Well, I'm not too grand then. But they got the nation's largest. one. It's the biggest one. It is a big blue-veined throbber of a 5G network and folks. Sounds great. That makes it, well, exactly, that makes it come with unlimited talk and text and high-speed data. Now, I know you talk on a phone. I know you text on a phone. I'm not sure what kind of data the phone needs. Maybe some way to get you out of jail or crucial information you might need to exist in your daily life. But Mint Mobile's going to give it to you for 15 bucks. a month because they're cheap that way

and here's why. Here's exactly how they do it. They let all these other big companies build all these big towers and charge all these big amounts of money for these same phone plan and then the people at Mint Mobile

they take a big old spool of coax cable and they run it from one of these big towers to the other but down low where nobody notices it. That's not what your phone calls are running through and they're No, that is not what your phone calls are running through. They do not use coaxial cable.

Like, it's 1986 to steal. They're not stealing anything. They do not use any cables. Well, now you're changing your story. I'm not changing my story. I'm modifying my story as we're going. If they don't use the coaxe to steal the service, then what do they use to steal the service?

This is not that story. This is the revised edition. What I'm saying is that they use the signals in the air, and they hop on those signals. And either way, you don't have to worry about any of this. You have to worry about the wonder. price that you're not going to have to worry about. You're just going to have to pay to get this wonderful service.

What's so confusing about that? Well, apparently you seem to be all turned around about it, but I'll tell you why you're hopping on these signals in the air, piggybacking on them, don't be dragging your feet because they're going from place to place that quick because Mint Mobile gives you the best rate whether you're buying for one or a family. And it meant Mobile families start at two lines. so apparently you can immaculately conceive. Just you and then you can have a baby and there's two lines.

The family, so be aware if you get MENT mobile, you may spontaneously impregnate yourself. You won't do that. You won't do that. However, that's a funny thing to think about, however. Well, you can use your own phone with any MENT mobile plan and you can keep your same phone number, along with all of your existing contacts,

whoever they may be, your drug dealer, your enforcers, your muscle men, the collectors that go out and, you know, do your bidding, whoever your existing contacts are and whatever kind of codes you've got for them, you can keep all of that. And you can choose from three-month plans, six-month plans, or 12-month plans, and say goodbye to your monthly phone bill and say hello to a bill every three-months or six months or 12 months, which apparently would be what then would be happening. But nevertheless, you can get, did I mention $15 a month, Brian?

And you can get the plan shipped to your door for free. They got a guy named Ethel. You know why they call him, well, you know why they call him Ethel? I do not know, no. I don't either, because I meant to say a girl named Ethel. They got a girl named Ethel that sits there and writes this plan out every time you order. That's how they keep the cost down. She writes out the plan every time she puts a stamp on it and sends it right out to you.

and it's free. That's not how it works, but... It's sort of a Don LaPray deal. It's not in any way like a Don LaPray deal. Let's stress that. Well, you can, again, 15 bucks a month, you got to expect some, you know, changes from a normal operation here,

but if you go to mintmobile.com slash JCE right now, then you can start up and sign up and start up at 15 bucks a month. That's right. Additional taxes, and restrictions may apply depending on where it is you live

and what kind of people are running your state. But nevertheless, once again, mintmobile.com slash jCE, a wireless plan with unlimited talk and text and high-speed data on the nation's largest blue vein throbbing network all for only $15 a month.

It's amazing. It's incredible. I don't even think anybody can talk that much to get their money's worth out of this, for heaven's sake. The unlimited part, you've got to talk all day and all night, talk all day, talk a little longer. Sounds like a wonderful challenge. The listener should take up. $15 a month, see how much talking you can do with MintMobil. What's that promo code, Jim?

Slash JCE. Vince had got a hold of Jungle Boy in 1995. That could have been ugly. That could have been some gobbledy, gookery-ish type of thing. He would have fired him and kept down a J. I know how that would have worked out. Well, it is, are they still an item? What happened to her?

Is she still around? I don't know. She should be on every show. Notice the ratings have dropped. The ratings have dropped. They should put the belt on Anna Jay. Well, actually. I don't go over Samoa Joe.

From the way that it sounds, the more that they take off of her, the more popular the show gets, rather than put the belt on her. She could just be out there wearing anything, Anna J. But then again, she also dates dipshit, so we can't really. judge anything on her, but maybe... Well, how many dipshits could a dipshit date if a dipshit dated dipshit? I don't know, Jim, but if you were a dipshit, perhaps you would say, you know what, I look like a dipshit, maybe I should shave.

Why are you doing the transitions? Oh, this is not my show. This is your show. It's not your show. That's right. I take back to transition. I'll bring it up. I take it back.

I take it back. Well, since you do bring up the subject and you are, you are. a dip shit, I'd like to tell you how you can shave yourself. Because any old dipshit out there right now, it's got $3. I'm talking $3. For three measly little dollars, you can get an entire shaving kit that will keep your face soft, smooth, slick, and elegant for, well, a number of days. I don't know how long this, it depends on how big your face is, how long this

wonderful shaving gel will last. But nevertheless, if you've got to cover more, let's say you're Heyman and your upper face is normal size, but your lower chenel area is the size of a peach basket. You might use more of this product. Will you leave him alone?

Well, I'm just, I'm trying to give people a visual comparison that they can instantly recognize. But folks, for $3, you can do that and more to your face if you go to our friends at Harries over at Harries.com. There is no apostrophe.

I found that out the hard way. You can't put an apostrophe in the website. It's just H-A-R-R-Y-S dot com. Harys.com. But you get a five-blade razor, not only the weighted, ergonomically designed handle. Mine is bright orange.

I believe they all are. You will not lose it when you're shaving out in the backyard. I know that's sometimes a problem. people before they go to work in a morning trying to grab a quick shave out in the backyard they accidentally drop their razor, they can't find it in the mulch bed

under the oak tree. That happens to everybody at one time or another. Well, this thing's orange. What, what? Doesn't happen to really anybody ever. Well, if it does happen to you, you'll be able to find it because this thing's bright, Hunter, Orange. And it's ergonomically designed

so your hand doesn't go numb and the tingling in your fingers that leads into a pain that goes all the way up your arm and into your shoulder where suddenly you want to scream out, oh my God, it burns. See, that happens to a lot of people, too, when you're holding that razor so long, but this is very pleasing to the grip.

And that's the German-engineered blades. And we've seen from numerous videos over the years, those Germans are their goddamn, they're serious about shit they do, folk. So if they design these things, they're going to be sharper than a serpent's claws. And you also get the foaming shave gel that will, it'll just, it'll foam until you can't foam no more. And it'll take all of the unwanted hair and follicles and outer epidermis, everything you want to get off your face. You can scrape it or gouge it off with one of these bad boys.

And it's only $3, folks. for the trial set, it's normally $13. Now, that's what a mark would pay if you're walking down a street with chalk on your back, but because you know us and we've smartened you up, the folks at Harries are going to give this thing to you for $3. A $3 trial set of all, not all,

but many of the fine products that they've got that you can get at their website. You can sign up to where they'll deliver these things right to your door, a guy in shorts and high navy blue socks almost up to his knees wearing tennis shoes when I first saw him he was off-putting but then when he kept delivering these fine quality shaving implements to my door well after a few weeks of seeing him about the same time every day well I got kind of used to him he never speaks as a matter of fact he won't look you in the eye but he will deliver these fine quality harry's products to you and to you

your home. What? Who are you talking about? Talking about the guy from Harry's. I don't know if it's actually... The mailman, it will be the mailman. The mailman is the mailman. The mailman is not replaced by someone from Harry's.

They don't have their own exclusive courier that goes across the country, this great land of ours, delivering their razors. They send it to you. Get three bucks. What a great deal. And you get it via the normal methods of shipping here in the great United States. So you think it's just me that he's bringing? these two? Who's he?

Again, the guy with the tennis shoes and the tall knee-high, navy blue socks that never looks you in the eye and doesn't speak, but he drops off the shaving products. I think you got some separate issues going on exclusive

to you and specifically Louisville than most people would ever have. Your mailman can be trusted. The U.S. Postal Service is your friend. and with that said, I actually am not sure how they shipped their products. They sent them to me and I don't remember if it was FedEx. Well, see, you know, or the mailman.

I'm not sure now. If the guys wearing socks, we might have a problem. But folks, anyway, you're not going to get socks, but you will get shaved. And it'll be a clean one and a close one. You'll never have a closer shave than when you part with your money with our friends at harries.com. And that's what you need to do right now. Go to harries.com. JCE

Harries.com slash jcee and you're going to get that $13 trial set for just $3 and then you see that you're going to like all these things and you're going to want more of them and now they've got you hooked

and then you know they're going to tell you exactly how you can get it every month from the guy with the high socks and no you won't because no one with high socks and no one's going to be hooked on anything you're going to get fine razors and if you need a fine razor you're going to love the fine razor you get

and you're going to have the ability to get more at a wonderful price from our friends at Harry's. You know how they make you want more? You know, sooner or later, with this razor, you're going to nick yourself just a little bit and that's when the serum goes into your bloodstream.

No, again, there's no serum that comes with this, there's no, no? It makes you genetically crave a slick, cheeked face and you must I think that's a Vince was patient zero when he would he would gouge himself

with the electric razor I mean you see now you're a liar Vince McMahon never used Harry's he used an electric razor like a Neanderthal because well that's because they hadn't invented Harry's back then and that's why he kept gouging himself

because he couldn't get close enough he couldn't get close enough if he'd have had Harry's maybe he wouldn't have lost his mental faculties if Vince McMahon could have finally had Harry's he would have gotten the close shave that he had always dreamed of, and it wouldn't have made him go absolutely bat-shittily mad.

He went the other way. He got a shitty mustache. He's the opposite of someone who Harries wants to get behind. Screw that pervert, but let's talk about the pervert that's listening to us right now. Yeah, nobody wants to get behind that pervert. They want to be in front of him where they belong.

Well, once again, ladies and gentlemen, Harry's fine products, support them, they support us. Very nice, tolerant people who support us, and we do like their product. What's that promo code, Jim? Harries.com slash JCE. Get the $3 trial set. I mean, that's couch cushion money for heaven's sake.

Three bucks to look like a human being. What are you? Some kind of caveman. Shave your fucking face. With Harries. Yeah. That was raw, and that ended at 11 p.m. And at that point, Jim, depending on what city you are,

if you're not in a city, you're shit out of luck. But if you're in a city, maybe you could order some food. It's pretty late. But what do you do? It's raw. It's over. It's late. You need a good healthy moo.

You need a good healthy moo and a meal. And we know some cook a cook a chef crafted chefs. Actually, the chefs are not crafted. We know some chefs that will craft some stuff for you. And here's the man who will craft the rest of this. Read, Mr. Jim Cornett. Oh, my God. You know, and I don't think it's really healthy if you're eating dinner at 11 o'clock.

at night eastern now. Maybe if you're out there on the West Coast, they dine late out there because of all their traffic problems, right? But otherwise... If you're not going to bed till four, that's fine. That blow your mind? No, that made me hit my wrong button.

But here's the thing that you could do. What you can do is you can just, don't think about anything that was just said. Just get that completely out of your mind. And instead, think about being hungry. folks, a lot of times you're hungry, but you got no time to eat. A lot of times you're hungry, but you got no time to go to the store. A lot of times you're hungry, but you got no time to cook, right? What's a common factor in this whole thread? You got no time. It's a hurry, scurry,

hustle, and bustle type of world these day. You're flitting here, you're flitting there. You got work, you got school, you got kids. A lot of people have children. I've heard this as a growing trend. And you don't have time to sit down and shop and, well, you don't sit down when you shop, unless you're one of those fat fucks that rides around on a goddamn fucking hover around at Walmart. But in that case, you're going to die soon anyway. But if you want to get healthy folks.

Let's not talk about when people will die. Let's talk about what people can eat to stay alive. Well, that's because fresh, never frozen food is what you need to eat. And you need to eat more quality stuff. what you might be stuffing down your gullet, but if you don't have any time, you can't spend any time on it. That's why our friends at Factor have the whole thing worked out.

At FactorMeals.com, they will send you meals that are either calorie smart or keto or protein plus or vegan and veggie or whatever you choose they'll send. But they only take two minutes to eat or two minutes to heat. Let me try that again. You're going to eat in as much time as you're,

need. There is no time limit on how long you need to ingest your meal. You can take all the time you want. If you're in a contest, you could eat them in less than two minutes. But they take they take two minutes to heat and then you can eat them at your leisure and convenience. Folks, they've got a weekly menu of 35 different options and more than 60 add-ons every week. They got breakfast. They got on-the-go lunch. They got stay-at-home, be hooked up to a machine, lunch, they've got snacks, they got beverages, stuff to make you feel good all day long. Apparently Viagra would be, I guess, involved in this.

Well, it said feel good all day long. Viagra is not involved in this in any way whatsoever. Just vegan and veggie. Well, not just vegan and veggie, but also keto, also calorie smart. Because a lot of people have gone on this new diet that's a fad thing. It's the vegan veggie Viagra diet, but that's not. not this. Who's doing that? Well, a lot of people out in California.

But if you're looking for gourmet meals, we'll try meals that feature premium ingredients like filet mignon, shrimp, truffle butter. I didn't know you could make butter out of truffles. I've had nut butter before. What? What's the more you grind up? Right down your funnel. Yeah.

You know, they also make almond milk. Did you know that? I did know that. Of course I knew that. And nut butter. and you can choose brocolini and asparagus. Broccoli. I had that. That's delicious. Yeah, well, there you go.

Have some more. Because these are no fuss, no mess meals. The factor meals eliminate the hassles of prepping, cooking, and cleaning up. You take your little... It's actually, it's in a little plastic tray. It's like something they'd give you in jail. And once you finish eating out of this, you just fucking toss it in the garbage. It's good to nobody at that point.

You're not going to rewash this thing and use it again. so you just eliminate it. And boom, you're cleaned up. Just heat this up and eat it and then ask no questions and throw the evidence away. People will not know where it came from. I don't know what has to do with anything.

Eat it and enjoy it and tell whoever you want that you enjoy it and you ate it. Well, yeah, if it's any of their business, if they question you hard enough, you've got to admit something, you know. Go ahead and tell them. and they tailor this to your schedule, folks. You can customize your weekly meals with the flexibility

to get as much or as little as you need. Let's say you figure, I only need a couple of walnuts and a grape to get me by on Tuesday, but then some days you may want to eat normally as humans would. And you can pause or rescheduled deliveries to suit your lifestyle.

Let's say you're going to be going down the river for a few months. You can put the pause on it, and that way they won't pile up on your front porch while you're boarding with the warden on the bounty of the county. Folks, again, and they're celebrating Earth Day all month long. Now, that sounds like a contradiction in terms. It should be Earth Month, but only at Factor Meals.com. Do you get Earth Month instead of Earth Day?

And you can look out right now on FactorMeals.com, Brian, this is very important. look out for the Earth Month Eats badge on the menu to determine which of the fine foodstuffs contain the lowest carbon footprint meals so that means that these meals fewer people have stepped on these meals than any of the other regular meals offered at factormeals.com some of those get walked on quite often

and they've got the Tony Atlas special No, they don't. Head to factormeels.com right now, folks, slash JCE50. Use that code JCE50 to get 50% off your first box, plus 20% off your next box. When have you ever been able to get money off your first box and money off your second box at the same time? This is unheard of.

It's a whole new deal. Factormeals.com slash JCE50, 50% of the code is JCE 50 I don't know you might have to put it in twice that's because you're going to get two deals 50% off your first box 20% off your next box and then

well after that you're going to goddamn get greedy then so you're not getting any more than that they've practically given you half your fucking well I've given you more than half your food here fucking greedy bastards no one's being greedy here but get your good eats get the good food the healthy food the chef-crafted food from factors.

You can't even really call them eats. It's not like it's some kind of diner somewhere on a side of the road, some greasy spoon. These are chef-crafted prepared meals here by crafted chefs, and they do arts and crafts. Also, some of the chefs do arts and crafts as therapy

from where they were in the home. No one was in the home, the home. No one was in the home, ladies and gentlemen. Well, you know, no, you know, just by, goddamn odds, somebody involved in this whole chain of custody here, from the customer to us to the people over at Factor Meals has been in a home before, I'm sure, probably against their will. You can't just make a blanket statement. Ladies and gentlemen, let's talk about your home and let's talk about the food in your home

in your kitchen, the food you need to cook and you don't have the time. Treat yourself well with Factor. Right here. Just pop this stuff in and eat it. Like I said, cup. every your tracks afterwards, there'll be none the wiser. You'll eat it in two minutes or less, guaranteed by Jim Cornett. Yes, just start shoveling it. Don't even use silverware. No.

Folks. Seriously, it's delicious, so take your time. Well, if it's delicious, you'd want to eat it quicker before somebody steals it from you. But if you take your time, you savor each bite, you savor every taste, you really enjoy the meal. Well, then it might get cold. Well, you can't take too much time. Well, you can't just sit on this forever. Don't sit on this forever, folks.

Because sometimes you'd be sitting somewhere else forever. Head to factormeels.com right now slash JCE50 to get all these percentages off all of your food and don't worry about it. Things will be fine. That's right. They'll be fine with Factor. What's that promo code one more time, Jim? JCE 50.

You know, Jim. Hook. he's from St. Mark's place. It's very easy to get some piercings over there. Well, it used to be. Now it's like NYU. The hell? Where is this going? Well, maybe he can get some fancy earrings to distract from the Raycon earbuds that'll put in his ear so he doesn't have to listen to Chris Jericho

talk, let alone sing. Well, you know, so that what you're saying is that's why that when you took me around town there at all the hip, cool coffee shops and Beatnik hangouts there in the big apple that in my time machine yeah yeah you know they were playing the bongos and they had the gilligan haircuts and we want the cafe waugh and that one place where they had that big venus flat trap in a corner they were feeding it hamburger that one i'll tell you but but that's that's what it's it's it's all about that and and where were we going oh i'll tell you where we're going we're going to the recons because the recons ladies and gentlemen that's why when you took

me, Brian, to that neighborhood, all those people that we encountered walking down a sidewalk, they were either just shaking their heads to and fro or nodding their heads up and down, or some of them were even singing to themselves. And that's because they all had the Racon wireless earbuds in listening to the soundtrack that they had determined was best for their own life. Is that what you're saying to me right now? Yeah, and sadly the village has lost that spirit. you mean well that's because they need more racons i'm telling you right now if anybody's in the

in the vicinity of what is that greenwich village greenwich village yes or the east village specifically greenwich village or over there in the east part of that village there if you take a bunch of racons tackle some motherfucker and start shoving these ears here do not do thank you for it do not do not turn them on to some really fucking head-banging tunes where when you shove these things things in their ears and they get up when they're chasing you, they're going to hear, they may have blood in their eye, but they'll have music. No, they won't do this. Listen, it's not like the old days.

It won't be a whino. Not that that's excusable. It'll be some NYU kid, some rich spoiled brat living in the village. Don't do that. Well, they're because, hey, a rich spoiled brat probably won't be able to run that fast to catch you. So when you shove these things in his ears and you're running off and he realizes he's got that great music playing and he's just going to stop.

With that dumbfounded look on his face and he's going to start bopping his head up and down to the music because he's listening to the Racon. Hey, you know, I'm joking about the death of the village, which is a real thing, and the expansion of NYU, which is also a real thing, if Hook is from St. Mark's place now, is he just hanging out with college kids all the time?

Well, that way he can cheat on his homework. Wow. Ah, but the Rekons, folks, back to them. And it's easier when you're holding somebody down with your left hand and to stick these things in their ears because they have the optimized gel tips. So they fit comfortably in your ears. So you don't really need to elbow it into the side of the guy's head. Just shove it in there with your thumb. And it'll go pop. And it'll stay there. Whether you're, you know, running away or whether you're chasing somebody or whether you play

in basketball or engaging in... Playing basketball. There's a great suggestion. Well, there you go. It even says some of that here. And or if you're having conjubial relations with your significant other. They won't fall out of your head. So maybe it puts some dirty audio on and that way it'll help that situation. Maybe you're someone who's trying to get to work and you want to distract yourself from the crime and the subway. Well, don't distract yourself from that because then you might be a victim of the crime in the subway. But that's why they've got the awareness mode. You can be listening to, for example, the police and then pop the awareness mode button and know whether you need to call the police.

See how that works? That was very good. That was very good. Yeah, thank you very much. And message in the bottle to you. Yes, or you might be getting hit over the head with a bottle. That's why they've got the earbud tap function. So you tap that earbud, it'll turn it off so you can duck that bottle.

That's not why they have that. Well, these things happen on the subway. And eight hours of playtime, you can ride from one into the subway to the other, 32 hours of battery life. And right now, the best thing is save money. You may use it to bail yourself out after you've finished being arrested for tackling the guy in the East Grinwich Village to fucking stick these things in his ear. Again, let's not tackle anyone even if it is in a improperly pronounced area of New York. But you're giving them free earbuds.

So doesn't that make it even? No, it doesn't make it even. Don't tackle anyone. Enjoy your earbuds and enjoy your day. Singing and dancing in the streets listening to Raycon. That's the thing. go out on the sidewalk and start singing and dancing and wearing a short skirt and if you're a man

even better because then people will look and while they're looking your accomplice can come up behind. No! No again! And just stick the goddamn earbuds in their ears without hitting them or tackling them. No. And then they won't know what. All of a sudden their ears will be filled with the sound of music.

My ears are suddenly filled with the sound of music. Courtesy of these Raycon wireless earbuds that somebody just stuck in my ears and ran off. What a lucky day. There will be no ear insertion that is not done by yourself. And let's also- Oh, that's called oral sex. That's not what that's called.

That is exactly not what that's called, but what it is. A-U-R-A-L. What it is called is Raycon. And what Raycon is is something you can buy for yourself or as a gift for someone that you hand them and they place in their ear at their own time and place of choosing. That's right.

choosing and you can save money too now. If you go to buy raycon.com, that's B-U-Y-R-A-Y-C-O-N, buyraicon.com slash J-C-E, you're going to get 20% off your Racon order and free shipping. So you order one. Actually, you need to order two earbuds because unless, well, like certain members of the feather bottom family, you only have one ear. but if you got two ears, order two of the earbuds, but you could order two sets, which would be four,

or three sets, which would be six, and on and on. And if you want to get a bunch of sets in order to go out and stick them in people's ears to make the world a happier place, then you're going to get 20% off and free shipping on the whole shit and mess. Buy raycon.com slash JCE. That's right. Leave people alone and enjoy music or...

podcast or whatever it may be with Raycon, what's that promo code, Jim? What do you mean to leave people alone? Now, see, that's why the world is such a lonely place. Leave people, you, who are you to question the idea of leaving people alone? Well, I leave them alone and they leave me alone. See, leave people alone. But sometimes people need to be not left alone. They don't want to be alone in this cold, cruel world.

Well, you'll never be alone with the sound of whatever you're listening to on Raycon. What's that promo code, Jim? Yes, slash JCE, 20% off and free shipping. They just order one for each year. Jim, we have returned from where we began, wherever that may be. And we have talked about AEW. We have some other stuff to talk about. Probably won't go too long today.

We have more stuff we'll be talking about on the experience. We're just, we're all scrambled here. We're scrambled here in time. We don't know where we're at. That's right. We don't know where we're at. we're at, and we also don't know how we'll see what we want to see because we are indeed time traveling, like the Sherman and Peabody of wrestling.

I'll let you figure out who's who, ladies and gentlemen. But Jim, wherever you may be, whatever continent you may be on or in the sky. You're grasping. You're trying to work. I don't know how I'm going to get there. You need to access content. You don't know how you're going to get your favorite content. You need to be able to get past whatever barriers are up there. ExpressVPN. Well, they're back. Our friends at ExpressVPN,

you've been waiting on them, folks, because we've had so much wonderful feedback from the quality service that the people at ExpressVPN provide. And Brian, now, not only do you need ExpressVPN so you can access this programming from around the world, and we found out some people in England

or the UK or over in Bolivia or Guatemala, they can see shows that we can't see. so we have ExpressVPN to make these people think that we're in Guatemala or Bolivia or the Isle of Malta so that we can watch these programs. You wouldn't believe the cooking shows on the Isle of Malta. But nevertheless, Brian, there's another problem here. Some things have been going on that you don't know. Did you realize that every time that you connect to an unencrypted network, let's say you're out at a hotel or an airport,

or a cafe. Actually, if you're a person who frequents cafes, you deserve to have something bad happen to you. What does that mean? Well, that's only for those hoity-toity, a little nose stuck-up in the air snobs. You have a little neighborhood cafe. You want to go get some coffee and something to eat?

What's the problem? Oh, a little cafe out there on the French Riviera with all the fucking millionaires and billionaires. Fuck them all. But anyway... That could be your talk show, Mercedes-Mone's Cafe. The Monet Cafe The Monet Cafe

And I understand they overcharge For everything on the menu But nevertheless Let's say you're at a hotel and an airport That's where normal people go But did you know that if you take one of these new The ding dang dang dingongs They've got these doodads

What do they call them laptops? Yeah, you get on the Wi-Fi networks In the hotels and airports With your laptop or your device or whatever Did you know, Brian, were you aware that any hacker on the same network can gain access to your personal data, the passwords, the finance,

they just swoop right into your computer when you connect to this network. It's like opening up a main artery to an evil, vicious poison in your bloodstream. What do they get in? Did they just hang out by the gate at the airport? Or they hang out in the lobby at the hotel and just wait for people?

Well, here's the thing. Apparently, from what I'm being told by the folks at ExpressVPN, there is a ring of 12-year-old children that are operating out of a discount hardware store, and they're going around all these places and stealing all your personal information

whenever you log on to one of these goddamn networks. Well, of course, it is true. It's not true, and you did not hear that from ExpressVPN. Let's make sure we say that right now. It is true. It says right here, it doesn't take much technical knowledge to hack someone, just some cheap hardware is needed, a smart 12-year-old could do it.

So these 12-year-old kids operating out of these discount hardware stores... No, there's no hardware store. It says just cheap hardware is needed. It says they can do it, not that they will do it. Not that they would do it, not that it will happen. They're getting a cheap hammer and a saw and an auger and a level. A cheap hammer? Well, it says cheap hardware, and they're going out these 12-year-old kids. and they are hacking into people's laptops

when they turn their back at the network at the hotel and the airport and the cafe at the network well they're on the network and you know hackers can make up to a thousand dollars a person selling personal information on the dark web as a matter for some people I'd like some information on

I'd pay even more than that but that's what you're risking not only and by the way remember folks it is the ExpressVPN people that brought light to the problem, the growing problem that we've been spreading awareness about, that the big major internet providers have people secreted in the walls of your home listening to whatever you're doing. We've established this is not true.

This is a figment to your imagination. This is not true. No, we've talked about it. That's why two people show up and only one leaves every time the cable company comes to your house. But now we know that not only are there people in the walls of your house. home, but when you go out in public, there's some 12-year-old breath that's too smart for his own good.

No. With a goddamn cheap fucking hacksaw ready to fucking steal all your information and sell it to the Russians. It's easy enough to hack you that a 12-year-old could do it, not that there's a gang of operating and selling information on the dark web. Well, not that we know of. That's because they're smart and it's dark. But I'll tell you, right now, ExpressVPN is going to stop all this, because do you know that right here it says it would take a hacker

with a supercomputer over a billion years, one billion years to get past ExpressVPN's encryption fucking thing they got going on. That may, if it would take a supercomputer, a billion years, a 12-year-old with a goddamn chisel, ain't going to cut it, right? So all you do is fire up the app and click one button and you are protected.

And as long as you pay these people, at ExpressVPN regularly and on time and in good currency that's spendable, then you're protected. But now the day that you let the fucking bill lapse now, some of your shit's going to blow up. But that's a... No, no, no.

Nothing is going to blow up, so let's not say that or joke about that. Well, blow up in the technical sense that, you know, it's just going to be all... It's going to be all scrambled. Well, when you turn it on... That's the technical sense of blow up? Yeah.

It just, it's all scrambled. You can't tell what's going on. Scramed. They got your, they got your shit in their hands. They can send it to fucking Nigeria or goddamn, the wilds of Australia. You never know where your shit's going around the world with ExpressVPN. They keep people on their toes. If somebody's chasing you, they're going.

I never know. Well, they're going to rack up a hell of a fucking Transbill if somebody's chasing you because ExpressVPN is relocating you all around the globe. so they can't pin you down. Of course, it is hectic, and you need to pack a light. But anyway, secure your online data today by visiting expressvpn.com slash JCE. That's expressvPN.com slash JCE.

You get an extra three months free. So that's three more months. You don't have to worry about some of these fucking delinquent children hitting you over the head and stealing your personal information. and you don't have to worry about the people in your walls and nobody's going to know where you, even your immediate family will not be able to find you

with ExpressVPN. Nobody's going to be able to track you down. It's like you vanish. All right, well, I don't think it's like that at all, but once again, access your favorite programs, whatever they may be on, wherever that may be with ExpressVPN. And protect yourself. What's that promo code, Jim, protect yourself?

J-C-E. Protect yourself. Protect yourself. All right. Well, that was embarrassing. Jim, let's move on. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you feel embarrassed, Brian. You didn't do that bad. I got you through it. Anyway, that brought a conclusion to our Hall of Fame portion of the WrestleMania weekend festivities with Paul Heyman giving a speech and then everybody else fucking boring us to tears. practically. The Rock giving himself a belt after Muhammad Ali's wife says she's

known him since she was six years old is one of the things that will always and the Undertaker coming out there just giving... Now that would now wait, now you've said it wrong there because now the way that you said it, she hasn't known the Rock since he was six. She knew Muhammad since he was six. That's right. We covered that earlier. And the Rock had a big summit with the Ali family at the Louisville Gardens to go over if he's allowed to call himself the people's champion. And all these years later, they had a belt made with WWE logos to present to him.

Well, and you know, you know, the whole rest of the story, don't you? No. The rest of the story is, during that summit meeting, you know, the Rock gave the Ali family the rights to

sell the people's champion merchandise with his name on it. And they turned around and they ran straight to our friends over at Shopify and set up a global commerce platform and they have secretly made $27,472,000 on the Rocks merchandise over the last several years. How would you know that? If they secretly made that, how would you know that? Well, because see, Shopify, the fine folks over there, they're the global commerce platform

that helps you sell at every stage of your business. They're our sponsor. And, well, I got to talking with one of the high-muckety-mucks over there and they told me just between him and me. Really? Yes. Interesting. That's because you don't get to speak to a lot of the high muckety mucks over there. You just speak to the, the regular fucking Kmart fucking shopper that, you know, talks to you.

But I get to only talk to the CEOs and the final bosses and the people over at Shopify and all the rest of our sponsors. Who did you talk to you? Talk to Joel? Henry? Phil? Yes. Carlos?

All three of them. All three of them. Joel, Henry and Phil. All three of them. And folks, you can talk. to Joel or Henry or Phil, whoever you talk to, they will tell you the same thing that Shopify is going to make you a lot of money. They're the place you need to go. If you've got a product and you've got a service, you'd like to sell on the internet, well, Shopify helps you turn

browsers into buyers. Shopify powers 10% of all the e-commerce in the United States of America. Shopify takes you everywhere from the launch your online shop stage to the first real life store stage all the way to the, did we just hit one million order stage and all the way into, oh my God, the IRS has caught us, they're cracking down, we're going to prison stage. They'll be with you through the entire life of your business. They will disassociate if you're a criminal,

you will do legal things and pay your taxes. Oh, as soon as you get charged with anything, they're going to disassociate you real quick. But as long as you're making money, you're part of the family with Shopify. And folks, again, they've got other, other,

other, they got lots of that and so much more. I can't even begin that. There are no words to describe the products that Shopify can help you sell. Running through my mind, they've, they've got other, of,

God damn it. They've even got those. Ladies and gentlemen, where else could you get such a variety? I lost the line. I think God gets so long on the email. It's double spaced. I can't find it where. Well, you can grow your average order value if I can't find where I was reading before.

And you don't have to just sell your own stuff with Shopify Collective. You can curate products to sell from the brands you love. You go into a store, you see something you like from a brand you love. You just take it. in your pocket, take it home, listed on your sites, shop-a- No, don't do that. Do not do that, obviously, don't steal, don't shoplift, Shopify magic. Shet says this is not Shoplifify.

What do you think? This is Shopify. There's going to be some payment going on somewhere. That's right. And there you're no excuses business partner. You can sell without needing to code or design, just have a wild hair up your ass and some kind of hairbrained idea, and Shopify will take it and run with it.

they'll teach you how to make money with it and then whenever you get too big for your britches or develop a drinking problem they'll leave you in the gutter somewhere and go on to somebody else and with Shopify Magic you can whip up captivating content that converts from

interest to sales immediately you can pick the perfect email send time generate instant fact answers make blog posts and product descriptions and whatever whatever you do with them from there.

And they make getting paid simple by instantly accepting every type of payment in the world. I'm talking every type of currency. You know, on some of the South Sea Islands, they accept shells as currency, Brian. You might open a box one of these days.

You'll get a bunch of fucking seashells from the seashore. They'll accept any type of currency, but they'll get you something. You'll get something out of this shit, no matter what. So, if you want marketing made simple and Shopify to remove the guesswork with built-in tools that help you create, execute, and analyze, then all you got to do is go right now to Shopify.com because they got a $1 a month trial period. I mean, geez, even if it just sucked donkey dicks for a dollar a month, who gives a shit?

Shopify.com slash JCE. That's all lowercase now, by the way. Shopify.com slash jCE for a $1 a month trial period to grow your business no matter what shape you're in or stage you're in or shape you're in or no matter what state you're in

offer void in certain states Shopify.com slash jcee is going to make you money but please folks and we're not doing this to knock AEW it's just ridiculous $2 billion It's like valuing impact at $250,000.

It's just way out of the realm. No, I'm kidding. It's a, but $2 billion. Come on. And then that would mean that the W.W.E was worth about $30 billion around the world, right? I still think they would, they'd take $2 billion in cash, no goddamn funny money, no credit, no whatever, the $2 billion in cash, you could buy TBS off of them down there. Fuck.

Anyway, you know, the big problem, Brian, the big problem with people believe in all these big numbers is because they're used to paying all these inflated numbers for prices. Do you realize, do you realize that steak used to be nine cents a pound? Do you realize that, Brian? No, I never thought about it, no. Steak used to be nine cents a pound back in 1882 when they just took a dull knife and cut it off the cow's ass, drug it through some sawdust to preserve it, and slapped it down on the butcher's counter where it sat there for about a month or six weeks until you had enough money to buy it. And boy, that was good eating.

But everything has gotten more expensive. Yeah, it certainly has. Everything has gotten more expensive because that's just the nature of the way the things have. happen in the world. A lot of people complain about that, but it's true. But there's only one thing, Brian, that's going down in price, down in cost, and up in affordability, instead of through the roof in cost and down in affordability. Do you have any idea what that might be? I have no idea where you're going in any way, no. I'll tell you, it's the cell phone plans. It meant mobile. The premium. I can't even call it a cell phone plan, because that, that, that

makes it sound too insignificant. It's a premium wireless plan. That's what you're getting. No wires come with this plan. Well, you do not have to, you don't even have to ever plug your phone in again. They just send a goddamn signal to it, and it charges the battery.

It's completely wireless, this whole plan. And because Mint Mobile feels that they should take prices backwards instead of forwards, you can get these plans for only $15 a month when you purchase the three-month plan. That would be a total of $45 because 15 times three is $45, and you see I'm good at deciphering. But that's what, you get everything.

You get to talk. You get to make phone calls on your phone. And that used to be, are you old enough, Brian? Did you used to pay long-distance phone bills? Oh, yeah. I used to pay them for calling you. Yeah. Well, now you don't have to do that anymore.

spoiled little cretans, it used to be $25, $350, $300 a month if you talked a lot on the long distance. Now, $15 a month, and that's not just talking. Because you can also do the texting thing like the kids do. An unlimited amount of that,

you can drive everybody you know absolutely bat-shit crazy and make them never want to see or hear from you again. You can text them at much, still $15 a month. And the data. Whatever the fuck that covers.

What does data cover on a cell phone, Brian? Sucinctly, tell me. It's everything. It's the pictures. It's the texting. It's all the things that would comprise the word data, or be comprised in the word data. There's comprising and there's data.

It is all covered by Mint Mobile. Even your compromising data. How about that? Well, they're uncompromising in the way that they'll compromise your data. But all the plans come with all of that. unlimited. And it's only $15 a month. And that's why that, for heaven's sake, steak,

if it's $15 a pound or $20 a pound, at least we have a food and drug administration now. Well, Mint Mobile is being the food and drug administration of the cell phone plans. They're trying to keep these other son of a bitch as honest. Because they're charging you way too much just for a signal that goes through the free air, the free unrestricted air that we breathe

on this planet and these signals are going and they're charging you a fortune for it. Nothing's free. Well, that's bullshit. Nothing's free. No, stick a fan in the corner of your room, get your own breeze going and then fart into it.

You'll get the fucking message. But right now, ditch overpriced wireless with MintMobil's limited time deal and get three months of premium wireless service for $15 a month to get this new customer offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan. go to mintmobile.com slash JCE.

That's your where you're going to get this special price folks. Mintmobile.com slash JCE and you cut your wireless bill to $15 a month with all the data, all the pictures, all the compromising. You could actually pick up pictures of other people's fucking families on this thing. It just sends a from everywhere. You can't. I don't even know what this thing would be based on what you're talking about. Well, this plan on your phone. a picture of somebody else's

Aunt Gladys and a goddamn 2-2 will pop up because it's unlimited is there's no limits on this you never know who you'll see Mintmobile.com slash there are limits

slash there's no limits god damn it we're out in a wild blue yonder cut your wireless bill to $15 a month there a $45 up front payment is required because that equals $15 a month for three months for the new customers. Additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply,

but you can see Mint Mobile for details or you can, no reason to delve more into why you might handcuff yourself for restrictions. Who wants to read about those? Mintmobile.com slash JCE. It used to be the joke that you would, when you had no other idea whatsoever, you would award a title at a battle royal,

or when you, you know, later on as multiple person matches like this became a thing, well, I just have a four-way on some indie show somewhere for a shot at the title of the blah, blah, blah. But now they just do it. But I guess you got to fill that time up somehow, Brian. I guess you got to, you got to just fill that time up somehow, just like some people, Brian, fill up box. Just willy-nilly with nothing important. Just taking up space, taking up weight.

You'd hate to get a box of crumbiness in the mail, wouldn't you? You would hate to get a box of bleh in the mail? It doesn't sound pleasant, no. No, you want to get boxes of awesomeness in the mail. You want to get boxes that have some weight, some cachet in the industry, some eye-popping contents. What?

The box has cashé in the industry, really? Yes, that's a box that we could all sit back and learn from and look to and want to be like and want to open up. We want to get in that box in the worst way. I'm sure somebody out there listening to me has been somewhere in their life where they've seen a box they wanted to get into bad. Well, that's a box of awesome. I'll tell you is what that is. so that's why you don't want boxes of crumbiness Brian you want boxes of awesome filled with things

that you will love and cherish and hug and squeeze and call George forevermore and that's why our friends over at Bespoke Post came up with their Box of Awesome at Box of Awesome.com specifically for that reason. You know this as well as I do. I do as well as you do. I'm glad you admit it. almost as well at least whether you want to drink and eat more awesome dress and travel more awesome explore more awesome have more awesome knives to fucking threaten people with and take hostages

i don't know what you're doing with all those knives you keep getting from they have other things besides weapons you know band-aids well at yeah and a person such as you don't wonder you're stabbing yourself in your office i'm not stabbing myself don't say that that's not what i'm doing That was the words you used earlier in our break. I've stabbed myself. I was reaching for something in my hand. My finger hit something as I was reaching for something. Yes, you stabbed yourself on it.

But it wasn't self-inflicted. It wasn't like a Don LaPraigant. Who else was there somebody there fucking hit you over the head and stabbing you while you weren't looking? You did it to yourself. It was self-inflicted. It's a tiny little cut in the tiniest of the little fingers. In your one-bedroom apartment.

That's right. Folks, I'll tell you, you can get a two-bedroom apartment this month in your Box of Awesome if that's what you're interested in because what you do... No, you can, but yes. Well, if it's on the list, you can. Because do you know right now that a two-bedroom apartment is not on the list over at Boxovesom.com? I'm fairly certain. There's no two-blogrim apartment. Well, that's not admissible in a court of law.

Folks, you go to Box of Awesome.com and you take the quiz and you, you tell them what different genres of things that you have interest in. And then they release new items every month across a ton of different categories. And the ones that you pick, they send you items related to those things. It's free to join up. And when you become a member, a member of an exclusive club that is free to join, you're going to have access to stellar discounts across a plethora of fine products that the people at Box of Awesome

actually they curate and collate and confiscate and confiscate these items from little small mom and pop businesses across the country and then give you massive discounts of like 30% or more. What's Mom and Pop gonna do? They're old, they're retired,

they got no muscle backing them up. It's a nice little shop there. It'd be the same if something happened to it. So Box of Awesome passes the savings on to you that they gain by extortion and or racketeering. And that way you can support these small businesses. 90% of everything that comes in your Box of Awesome is from a small up-and-coming brand or company, and they've got empty shelves now because Box of Awesome is taking everything.

And they're going to give you more than what you bargain for at Box of Awesome, because, Brian, you may know this. you're going to get a free mystery gift that's of something you have no idea of what it is and they may not either until they send it to you and then boy you're going to get it but a free mystery gift with your first monthly shipment when you sign up at boxofosom.com and enter the code jCE at checkout that means just on my initials alone you get a free gift not only a free gift but a free gift that's a mystery. You're going to look at this thing

and you're going to say, what the fuck is that? And then you're going to be spending hours of fun, Googling it, trying to figure out what the fuck it is, what it does, or what it eats.

So that's boxofawsome.com. The code is JCE for a free mystery gift with your first monthly shipment using the code JCE at boxofawsome.com. And you don't have to get the knives like Brian.

You can get cocktail items. You can get camping essentials. You can get smelly good stuff. You can get barbecue rub. You can get things to eat and to drink. And to snort for that matter. No, not for that matter. No, you can't.

No, what? Well, it depends on what you do with some of these things. No, you can't. You will not be getting anything to snort. If you can take some of this barbecue rub from the Great American Spice Company in Rockford, Michigan and snort a line or two of that, I bet your goddamn sinuses will clear out in a hurry.

Try that, Jericho. Yeah, and then trademark it. Anyway, Box of Awesome.com, promo code is JCE in case you're going to ask. That's right. Promocode JCE in case they ask. Well, they're not going to ask now because we just told them. All right.

It's one of those days. And here we are on a number. another day. You got anything to say for yourself? I got nothing. I was waiting for you to get somewhere. Just got to stop in a light or anything. Don't just pull up the middle of the fucking highway.

Geez, go to go over to the curb, put your flashers on. I'm proud to report to you that we have traveled into the future and I have goddamn got less energy now than I did previously. So there's that. Which was later in the day in the past. Yes, but now it's the future, and I ain't got a lot more rest since then. But we're going to soldier on with this thing. That's right.

We are, and we just talked about dynamite. So before we get to more sad news, we will tell everyone that, you know, there's lots of things to, that's not really a good transition. You know, what we want to tell everyone is Everyone wants to be an entrepreneur Everyone wants a store of their own But in this modern, fast-paced Hurry Scurry World

Hurry Scurry jet setting up People just They're just flying all over the place now You can call a plane Anytime you want one now They're just flying all over there's no time For what? Making money?

What is your transnational? My point is you need help online because there's so many things happening. You just need a quick, ready to go, like the Concord, which is actually out of service. Or, uh, well, it's continued it. But you need a fast way to get your business going by Cornets Collectibles. And of course, we're talking about our friends at Shopify. Explain that, Jim. I can't explain any of that.

You have, you put, Shopify as not defunct. It's not a defunct service, ladies and gentlemen. You know, here's the thing. Here's the thing you need to think about. Why in the world, in today's uncertain environment, are you not taking your own destiny into your own hands, ladies and gentlemen? Why are you, instead of relying on the man, instead of going to work for some company,

and you work there 40 years, and when you're ready to retire, they give you a pocket watch and kicking it. ass and say yon yon, baby. That's odd times. But see, now you can work for yourself. You can make your own money. All you have to do is come up with a product that you would like to market to the masses,

possibly even a service that you would like to provide for the common folks out there. And then Shopify, our friends over there at the global commerce platform, they will help you sell at every stage of your business. They will help you conceive the store, execute the store, not without several appeals in a call from the governor, and they'll help you rake in the cash as people all around the world buy your product, whether it be the widget, the framostat, or the thermonuclear device. No, thomoneuclear device. See, I've got your disease, Brian. They also can help you sell speech therapy lessons, too. overworked podcasters who just want a fucking break in life. God damn it. So if you're in podcasting, get the fuck out of that and start working by the sweat of your brow, your own two honest hands.

You know, idle hands are a tool of the devil. And the devil's hands are a tool of Austin Idol. And you need to dig in and work hard. And then you will be rewarded with the extensive help resources that Shopify presents at every stage of your game all away from the mom and pop store to the multi-million dollar platform they've got the technology,

they got the expertise, they got the experience, not to mention their award-winning POS system, which ain't no piece of you know what. And all you got to, Brian, do you know how much this incredible opportunity will cost you? Do you have any idea?

how much that you can get in on the ground floor of Shopify with? I have no idea. One dollar. Whoa! One dollar a month trial period at Shopify.com slash JCE, all lowercase on that JCE, by the way. I have no, something will happen bad. If you capitalize it, goddamn don't, don't risk it. But if you go to Shopify.com slash JCE right now to grow your,

your business, no matter what stage you're in, well, then you're going to get that $1 a month trial period. Of course, after the trial is over and the verdict has been rendered, then you may be on your own. But once again, Shopify.com slash JCE to make more... That's money, for the record. Make more money. Yeah, I think they got the goddamn idea. You can't presume anything. I'm not presuming. I'm at. Assuming.

If you presume you make a press out of you and me. A pre out of you and me? That's right. Well, Kaching, Shopify. Somebody else just made some money. JCEE, all overcase, of course. For whatever reason that is.

We shall see, but that was the dark side of the ring. Black Saturday. Jim, your audio has been a nightmare today. I'm really pissed off about it. I'm embarrassed for the listener. or for myself in front of the listeners, I wish our friends at Mint Mobile supplied Internet to people like you

the way they supply wonderful mobile phone service. To people like me, people that don't deserve the good things in life, Brian? Is that what you're saying? You ought to be embarrassed about our friends at Mint Mobile because you misspoke the other day because everybody knows that Mint Mobile, the place that has the best phone plans

now. As a matter of, they're not just phone plans. They're plots. They got this all figured out. No, it's not a plot. I wouldn't call it a plot. It's a plan for you. They have set back and they have plotted this out. They've got its, it's perfection from, from woe to go and or go to woe, whichever, however you start and stop. But you misspoke the other day, the fine, fine young man and entrepreneur and connoisseur that started this company meant mobile. is that Ryan Reynolds. He's a movie star. He's a TV star.

He's an all about, gadabout, a man about town. And you said that he was the star of Deadspin. And he's not the star. He's the star of Dead or Alive. No, that's not it. No, remember Dead or Alive. You spin me right round, baby, right round,

like a record, baby, right round. I want your love. What? See, you remember that record. That's a dead or alive. Ryan Reynolds is that guy that did that, and now he's got this phone company. That's not him. No, and it wasn't Deadspin.

It was Deadpool, which I knew, and I somehow misspoke a few times. You didn't catch it because you thought it was dead or alive. Well, no, is it Deadspin? He's one of the, no, Deadspin or Dead Pool. Deadpool. He's one of the new comic book. They didn't have him when I was a kid. And he's one of the new guys.

What are his powers? is he dead or alive? He's just ugly, and he wears a mask. Well, why does they call him Deadpool, then? If he's still alive, but he's just ugly. He used to like to swim. Okay, I'm not connected. Is this one of the ancillary characters these days?

No, he's a pretty big character. Get pool? And he's connected to the X-Men. And he's ugly? Wolverine's going to be in the movie. We're not supposed to be plugging in the movie. We're talking about Mint Mobile, but. No, well, it's this guy.

He quits. singing, yet he became an actor, and he somehow, I thought he was dead. No, no, it's not the guy. Have you ever seen whatever happened to that guy, Peter Burns from Dead or Alive? You ever see what he looks like? Who's Peter Burns? The lead singer of Dead or Alive. I thought that was Ryan Reynolds.

Why would you think that? Well, because you said he was. I never said that. Well, what happened? You said he was. Your mind went to that awful song. You said that this guy looked horrible. You said that the, you said that, you said it.

You ever, you, you just said that the other guy was ugly. That was one of his superpowers. You said if you seen a picture of him, he looks terrible. Are you talking about the guy from Dead or Alive or Deadpool? I thought it was the same one because they're both ugly. Listen, let's talk about if this rumor is going around, you have to get on the phone, you have to try to snuff it out. Well, no, you got to get on a telephone and call somebody and say,

I want your love. because of Ryan Reynolds being the guy that sang that song and now he's dead. So we got to honor him. No, Ryan Reynolds is not dead for the record. He's alive. He's very much alive. Okay.

Well, and he's still singing. He's not a singer. He's got this phone company called Mint Mobile. And they've got phone plans for $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan. And I know you're going to say, well, how in the world do they do that? He doesn't need much because he's dead. and he doesn't really need much to sustain him anymore. He's an international actor and business person now.

Well, it's a business. It's not like all the money's going right into his pocket. He owns the business of... Well, I'll tell you what. If the money isn't going into his pocket, he may have to throw somebody over the dagum railing. He's going to say, you think he's Jim Barnett? What's going on over here?

Well, he might be Oli Anderson bringing in to find out, hey, who's keeping my money away from me? But say bye-bye to the people keeping your money away from you, folks, with your overpriced wireless plans, jaw-dropping monthly bills and unexpected overages, you're not going to get any overages on Mint Mobile like that that are unexpected. You're going to, well, they're not going to let you go over at all. If you try, they'll slap you right down. Actually, no, there's no slapping down of anyone.

Well, they'll at least give you a slap on the wrist, won't they? if not a just a jaw-rattler, just a slap on the wrist to remind you not to do that again. Well, I mean, they are serious. Again, possibly. The Rock ran away from Ryan Reynolds when he got him mad. Well, there you go, because he's a badass. Because once you've been dead,

there ain't nothing that a motherfucker can do to you. But these premium wireless plans for MintMobil started $15 a month. I mentioned that because they come with high-speed data, unlimited talk, and text delivered on the nation's large. 5G network if only they did the internet use your own phone with any MENT mobile plan bring your phone number bring your whole family's phone numbers

let's have a fucking party and start calling people just call people at random they'll enjoy hearing from you but you can ditch the overpriced wireless with this limited time deal three months premium wireless service $15 a month you say Jim how can you make yourself a member of this fine plan or this phone plot as they say, well, all you got to do if you're a new customer, because it's a new customer offer only. If you're older, I think, what is the cutoff age, Brian, about 50, 52? No, no, it's not age restricted.

It's about a new customer in terms of someone newly doing business with Mint Mobile. Oh, so you can be old and still be a new customer. Yeah, it's going to be $15 a month. You go to mintmobile.com slash JCE. that's mintmobile.com slash jce spell just like Mobile Alabama and you cut your wireless bill to $15 a month and this is how it happens it's a $45 up front payment required that's equivalent to $15 a month new customers as we mentioned on the first three-month plan only no matter how old you are

speeds slower above 40 gb on the unlimited plan whatever the fuck that means and additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. You can see Mint Mobile for details or just call Ryan Reynolds up. His numbers 555-474-2549, and he'll be glad to answer all your questions. Wake him up. He's on West Coast time. He needs to get up out of bed. He won't be there, but Mint Mobile is and will be.

Once again, what's that promo code, Jim? Mintmobile.com slash J-C-E, and I believe we're. we've gone over all the details. And regardless of Ryan Reynolds' current status, this offer will stand. For a limited time on it. Oh, that was raw. Yeah.

That was raw in English. A hole in my head. Here's here. I have an evening of that. Well, you know, Jim, perhaps after watching Raw or even just listening to the review of Raw. Yes. Someone wants to take a nap or just get a good night's sleep, a comfortable night's sleep.

We know where to send them. well that's exactly right and we'll tell you where to go right now folks and you'll like it as a matter fact you'll have a smile on your face because we're going to send you to sleep land with our friends at helix over at helix sleep.com because they've been with us for so long Brian years and years now and the reason is because they keep sending out these mattresses that people are just floating away on they laid dead it's like sleeping on a cloud curling up in a warm puppy's belly being surrounded by a box of fluffy little birds

little robin red breast ragged robin peep peep peep it's I'm telling you that it's like being in a bird's nest and somebody's going to bring you a worm and stick it in your mouth and rub your throat so you don't even have to swallow that's the comfort level There are no worms involved. That is not the comfort level.

Well, I said somebody's going to bring you a worm. There's nobody that's... It's not Helix's responsibility to supply the worms. Yeah, you've got to have your spouse, your significant other, some child family member... Some child? Some child... Have one of them.

Some child or family member has to bring you your own worms. Helix cannot take on that responsibility. They're already the finest mattress. people in the whole world, they can't go into worm farming. Well, for the record, you don't need worms. There will be no worms. There will be no worms supplied. And we have Helix sleep mattresses here in Last Manor.

Everyone loves them. Yes, and I was mentioning that like these little birds that I have in my garage and that they're in the nest and they're comfortable and they're safe and they're warm. And they're sitting on top of a garage door opener. You don't even have to put the Helic Sleep mattress on top of your garage. garage door opener, you can put it in your bedroom or in any other room in the house that you'd like to sleep in or engage in mattressing activities. Does it vibrate under the birds? Like when you open and close it? No, I've had the door open for two and a half weeks. The garage door's been open

for two and a half weeks? Yes. Are you serious? Yes. You're serious. I mean, I can't tell me you're joking about it. Yes. No, I'm serious because I can't, I don't want the chain to rip the nest. I didn't think you were leaving the whole thing open for two weeks. You can't do that. Why not? It's your garage. What other animals are going to come in there? What if other animals?

What have other animals get in there? Well, they'll be told to leave. If the deer come in there, you're going to tell them to leave? Well, no, but they'll go out again the next day. They can't come in a house. The door is locked. You are setting yourself up for disaster. For nonstop animal visitors.

It seems like a bad idea. Back to Helix sleep. Back to Helic sleep. folks again they've got the Helix kids mattress designed for growing bodies and endorsed by child sleep experts and this this thing is amazing designed for growing bodies they have apparently conducted experiments where they put a a type of i guess fertilization material in this mattress that makes your children grow abnormally large abnormally quickly and is it's designed specifically for growing bodies. It's designed for growing bodies. It won't make your pets bigger. It's just growing bodies is what it's designed for. But if you put your children on it, apparently it makes them just plain big, almost overnight. No, they're not, it's not going to, no one, people aren't growing because of the Helic sleep mattress. It is the natural evolution of life. It is the growth spurt. It is puberty. There

are lots of reasons that people have natural growth. Of course, some celebrities are on growth hormone. What's up, Rock? There's various reasons that people grow. The first fert is what led to growth of children. But it says right here that the Helix Kids mattress is designed for growing bodies. It's designed for bodies that will be growing no matter what mattress enters the house. Well, look at here.

Does that mean that then if I get one of the regular mattresses that I can't gain any weight? Well, that's it. That's brilliant. So, folks, if you get one of the adult mattresses, you can lose weight, but you can't gain any weight because you can't grow. And you can't promise any of this because once again, ladies and gentlemen, your height, your weight, your growth, nothing will be affected by the mattress you get. The good thing about Helix Sleep is they are making these mattresses specific for people that will be encounter. encountering these normal everyday, they're not even issues, occurrences in life.

What do you say to that? Well, I'm just reading a copy here, and, you know, and you're good, actually, you know, it says right here that good night's sleep promotes health and growth. So if you're, this does, if you get a good mattress and you sleep the required minimum daily distribution of sleep per day, according to the federal sleep institute, and you also eat right

and stay away from hard drugs and hard living that you will indeed grow. So these mattresses will help you grow. You're going to get better, healthier on a healing sleep mattress. If you're just sleeping out in a goddamn pile of gravel. They're not going to help you grow. They're designed to be there for your growth.

You mean you can grow the same size and sleep in gravel? Yes, although, and again, a lot of the audience are already fully grown. Well, we're sleeping gravel. Well, forget about the fucking gravel. Helix sleep mattresses or fine mattresses that cause you to not gain weight or anything else, but get a good night's sleep. And you design them custom for you. Yeah, well, you don't design them.

They, it's not just, not, it's not a survey. There's like a survey and you say like, oh, I like to sleep on a hard surface or a soft service, or maybe even gravel, who knows. I'm banging the table a lot. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, and sorry, Jace. Well, but nevertheless, should we tell them how they can save money on a Helix mattress to try out for their own because that way they would be able to tell for themselves

and make their own judgments and their own decisions? Because after all, many of you out there are indeed adults who can handle your own affairs if you have not signed over your power of attorney to anyone. I suggest not doing that except as a, of last resort because you never know when your faculties could return, but

nevertheless, folks, right now if you want a good night sleep or just to hear us stop talking, go to helixleep.com slash JCE right now, helixleep. com slash

JCE right now. You'll see the wide variety of their mattresses. You'll tell them through their quiz which ones and or one you are interested in, you will pick one out, you will instantly love it. If you don't, they'll give you your money back and all that sort of stuff. And right now, listen to this discount, Brian.

Apparently summertime is when people just want to, they want to make a mattress change because Helix offering up to 30%. That's the biggest one I can ever recall. You got to hop on this while the hopping is good. and you can hop on these mattresses too. Like bunnies, you can hop on them. 30% off all mattress orders and two free pillows. If you go to helixleep.com

and use the code slash JCE. And it's not going to last long. I think they'll sell all the mattresses out. They may run out of material to make more. They get it while they're still around because these things could be back, ordered till Kingdom come with a deal like this. They have materials.

They are not going anywhere, but get your mattress today. How fast can they work? There's a lot of people in the Helix system. I'm telling you, go right now, run fast, go to this and get these things because they're going to run out of them and they're going to be back ordered because how can they're that 30% off and two free pillows? Well, you don't need anything else except maybe a furry blankie to fucking. can lay your weary head down and go to sleep at night.

That's right. Go to sleep at night with Helix sleep. One more time, what's that promo code, Jim? JCE. Well, that's the AEW booking update, ladies and gentlemen. Back to you, Jim. Well, I'll tell you, Brian, sometimes it's like it's on Wednesday nights when you tune into that television program, you don't know what you're going to get, but usually it's not

very good. But see, that's the opposite of the formula that our friends. over at boxofawsome.com take. We've been talking about them. You just recently got some type of, I don't know, paramilitary equipment from them. Regular equipment for the woodsmen

for the man who likes to go out and take care of our business. Yes, in Bogota. In the woods. Possibly in Phnom Penh or somewhere. Maybe by a lake. Ripping people apart with their intestines on a hook or some type of thing.

Again, I don't know what goes on. of your little fantasy world over there, but I'm talking about someone who just enjoys nature. Did you not get a gut hooked knife? To enjoy nature with. To enjoy nature with. Whose guts are going to get hooked? It doesn't have to be the guts of a living thing. It could be the guts of a tree.

Well, the tree is a living thing. Fuck. Yeah, huh? Work on that and get back to me. But the point is, when you get us something from the box of awesome.com, folks, it's awesome and it's positive. You might not know what's coming. but boom when it hits you right now with the boy when that delivery man winds up and throws that box

and it hits you right in the face boom you're going to say that's awesome because all you got to do is go to boxof awesome.com and you just take the quiz a few simple answers to a few simple questions now be truthful now because this could affect your future because they want to know what you're interested in so they can pick the right upcoming boxes of all. awesomeness, which is plural on that. Boxes of awesomeness or box of awesomeness boxes of awesome.

Oh, shit. Boxes, well, they want to find out what to send you in these cardboard packages of which we speak. Awesome cardboard. The cardboard is awesome. The box is awesome. It's just filled with awesomeness. Well, sometimes the intercontainment.

are quite awesome, but it's regular cardboard on the outside. But anyway, and then they find out what you like and they use that. Sometimes they'll tell your wife if you don't pay for this shit. They deal with whoever the customer is. They don't start talking to family members unless somehow they're your emergency contact. It's a last resort. Why do you need an emergency contact? You're going to fall on the gut hook knife? You know, don't forget, I also have this mini bones. It's not a bone saw. It's not a bone saw. It's not a bone saw. It's not a bone. saw I shouldn't have said that it's where is it? It's someone removed it?

It's a commando wire saw. It's a wire saw. God damn. Stained with steel wire with nylon handstraps. So my hands will be fine while you're screaming and yelling. Look you here now. But remember, it's all about mom and pop at Box of Awesome because all of their boxes of awesomeness or 90% of them come from small up and coming brains.

that deserve a leg up a foot up deserve to be hoisted on their own petards or hung from gut hooks or whatever the case but it's it's mom and pop the backbone of America and we got to support them and that's what you're doing too so you tell them what you like and every month they send you a box of awesomeness and you're going to have access to stellar discounts across the aforementioned plethora of products 30% off more less in the middle of right about there sometimes it averages out about 29.5 and you're supporting mom and pop brands like like moms and and pops you remember pops brand do you

remember moms but they were freaky they both got matching brands again we're talking about the small businesses all across this great land of ours good old America you love America bald eagles and beer and American flags and one of the great things in my box here was surviving the great outdoors by Brandon Leonard is a great book. Lots of things. If you get a question about how do I roll a kayak or what should I eat on a hike? How do you roll a kayak? I didn't even know you could smoke a kayak. Can I rent camping gear? How can I tell if a spot is flat enough to sleep on? Should I use clip and no, no, stop. Oh, pump the fucking brakes. What? How can I tell if a spot is flat enough to sleep

If you don't roll over on your stomach, motherfucker, it's flat enough to sleep on. If you... Oh, this is the water section. If you lay down in a particular area and without trying to, you roll over on your fucking snout, find another spot to sleep. Should I feed animals in the wild? Although it's tempting to think about giving little squirrels and a bit of your trail snacks, you shouldn't feed the animals.

your generosity causes animals to abandon her natural food sources and become dependent on handouts from hikers. When the hiking season ends, the animals lose their food source. On popular trails and summits, hikers who sit down for a snack experience the effect of years of hikers feeding animals as they're pestered non-stop by persistent squirrels. And that goes into more squirrel detail from there. Awesome! Yeah, but then they are talking about, basically now they've started eating the hikers who no that's not in no way is that here well that's that's

what that's the natural thing that's happening you're they're they're they're relying on your food and you stop giving them the food as this book suggests and then they're going to take the food anyway and maybe they're not too judicious about what the food is so folks that's right tell tell the folks at box of awesome you like knives probably going to need it to come up against the animal apocalypse. And right now, you can get a free mystery gift with your first monthly shipment when you sign up at boxofawsome.com

and enter the code JCE at checkout. That is a free mystery gift. It may even be a small little baby woodland creature for you to raise in your own home. It will not be anything breathing. It may be something you could plant, so I don't want to say anything living because plants are living things, ladies and gentlemen.

but we kill them and eat them anyway. Along with incense and peppermints, the color of time. So right now, boxofawesome.com, promo code JCE, free mystery gift with the first monthly box of awesomenosity. Would that be into the past tense of the plural would be awesomenosity? I guess so, free mystery gift. And sign up now and win a free mystery date with the Rock and Roll Express. Well, no, it can't be a fucking mystery date if you're telling them who the fuck it's with. The mystery is what Ricky and Robert are going to encounter when they get there.

Well, they sent Scott Munn says the goddamn chaperone, didn't they? The cameraman, yeah. No, no. Joe Watts was on camera. Oh, was he for that? And Scott Munts was the chaperone because of whatever age the young ladies were. But that was the, where do that's the, that's the big. Super date at the Superdome.

Yes, but the big heat Joel got. Didn't he erase the fucking tape? Didn't he goddamn accidentally tape over the tape of the Super Date? I'm not sure. Boy, how to, who could, all right, somebody's going to hear this and help me out, but I believe that there was significant heat because Joel managed to somehow either not tape, tape over, somehow the, did you ever see the, did you ever see the, did you ever see the footage of the super date or just the

advertising of and the winners of but not the actual date, right? I remember the commercials vividly. I don't remember the actual date, no. Well, there may be a reason for that. I can't remember it well enough, but but anyway. Box of Awesome.com, enter the code JCE

and you will get the tape of the Rocket Roll Express, the Super Date, it's a super dumb. you won't get that but you'll get so much more box of awesome dad's brother's 90 fucking years old now or whatever and he doesn't need to be doing the nightly news but he's a world traveled well-read man

who's talked to a variety of world leaders and figures and dignitaries so they have him do an interview show and I think it's on access whatever it's on yeah Ted Coppel does a thing every now and then on CBS Sunday morning yes and and Ted Coppals what 107 or whatever but

so J.R. would be a spring chicken in this category but yes give J.R. the opportunity or the ability to do some type of sit down interviews and flesh out productions whether it be for the peacock or whether it be for documentaries or whatever the case and just recognize what he's done and keep his travel schedule light while he's got health issues. And, you know, he always likes to stay busy, but geez, take care of yourself first. He's got more money than most citizens of the

state of Oklahoma. So he doesn't need the money. Well, now that we found out he's a cocksmith, maybe we can talk about a new book he could write and maybe we could talk about a place he could sell it, maybe he could set an online sore up with Shopify. Well, and I'll tell you what right now, I think they have some kind of standards on what kind of pornographic material that you might be able to market through Shopify. A memoir isn't pornographic.

I mean, those photos and Polaroids would be... You can write about all of the various encounters that he's had with women across the globe and sheep in some instances, in some small towns in Mississippi, early in his career, the sheep stories alone.

Down in Mississippi, Mississippi, though, well, the payoffs for the fucking Colkins were bad, and sometimes their sheep farm was the only thing that kept the talent coming back to those towns in Mississippi. All right, enough about the sheep farm and sheep. But folks, if you've got something to sell on the internet that doesn't involve pictures of small town

men from Oklahoma with sheep in compromising positions, well, then Shopify can help you out because everything else is pretty much okay. I mean, you can sell nuclear waste on the internet these days. You can sell secrets to various foreign governments and everything in between, but you got to have an attractive storefront. If you want to attract the finest in international internet terrorism today, you've got to have an attractive store, you've got to have a platform that can handle the sales. I found that out the hard way. You've got

have a platform that won't cave in when all the customers put their weight on it. And that's why Shopify is one of the global leaders, if not indeed the global leader. I hesitate to say that everybody is following them around these days, wanting something, got their hand out. The people at Shopify, they're trying to stay ahead of the game, but they got all these people dogging their footsteps trying to catch up with what they have already done. so they can power your business, Brian,

from the word go to the word woe. And you will utter the word, whoa, when you see how much money they're going to make you. What would you like to sell on the internet, Brian? I would say, whoa, if you tell me more about some of the women Jim Ross was hooking up with. You seem to have a story to tell, my friend. Well, I'll tell.

It's a little pill with a big story to tell. But that's not anything. That's that not Ozympic, but Olympic or Ozantic. No, it's type 2 diabetes, but I manage it. Well, it's a little bit more. Guardians. Guardians, don't take that pill, folks, because it will make your fallopian tubes get tangled up in your goddamn IT. Let's not make any medical decisions or any recommendations.

That is for your doctor. And your doctor only speak to your medical professional who's gone to medical school, not us. Yes, and leave all your medical decisions up to the folks at Shopify, because they'll tell you how to make money on the medicine that you might be receiving from your doctor. You could set up a store, turn around, and resell that stuff. No, no, you can't do that. That's not allowed. You can't do that.

No, that's certainly not allowed. You're not a pharmacist. You can't resell prescription medication, but you can sell. What about if you credit the original pharmacist, say this came from Joe's discount pharmacy, but I'm selling it here. So you're giving credit where credits do. Still highly illegal. Credit or no credit. However, let's say you have crafts. Let's say you have T-shirts. Let's say you have a business. Let's say you make music. Let's say you're in a rubber

room at a puzzle factory and they've given you paints and allowed you to have some paper. And now you want to figure out a way to market those pictures. Is that what you're talking about? Hey, art, you never know where you're going to find the next great artist. That's right. Whether they got one ear, two ears, whatever, folks, put both your ears up and perk them up while I tell you how that you can sign up for a $1 a month trial period at Shopify.com

all you got to do is go to Shopify.com slash jCE Shopify.com slash JCE in lowercase. That's very important for some reason. And they're going to start you out and finish you up from start to finish you up.

From start to finish, they will tell you exactly what you need to do and how you need to do and then they're going to do it for you, and they're going to give you some of the money for doing it. And you're going to be farting through silk, you're going to be rolling in the dough, you're going to be, you're going to acquire a mistress, you're going to get a Lamborghini,

you're going to start taking trips to Las Vegas where you associate with shady characters, you're going to be that wealthy and that successful. Or you just keep doing you and put it all in the bank. Either way, you have the opportunity with Shopify to sell to the world. what's that promo code Jim? What kind of fun is that?

Sell to the world. What's that promo code Jim? Well, you sign up for a $1 a month trial period at Shopify.com slash JCE, all lowercase. Go do that now to grow your business no matter what stage you're in. Shopify.com slash JCE. Caching is right.

Shopify.com slash JCE checked them out today. you remember Kaching he was part of Gary Hart's army along with Paxong Nam All right Thank you for that information ma'am Nam

name it was nam I know what it was I'm trying to figure out of way to get out of it Diana said I'm going to say this and that and Sean and you don't realize that I I'm blah I said no I said Diana just say this just say

when Michael's professes his innocence or whatever he's totally taken a back about this and you step up just say Sean you know you want me but here's what I couldn't have been and she's like well no because like I'm cutting all her

lines right this is her big dramatic part what I couldn't say especially right there for a Davey boy it's his wife I couldn't say Diana the reason why this is going to get so much heat with the viewers is because here's Sean Michaels the heartbreak kid and they know

whether they think wrestling's fake or not they know that he's fucking everything they've seen her or seen him with Pamela Anderson on the pay-per-view I'm not saying they fucked but he can have any woman in the world right and you are really

possibly overstepping your fair evaluation to say that he would be lusting after you with your current and you're a little older et cetera. I couldn't say that. But I said, Diane, please promise you. I promise you, if you just say that

because you're being really egotistical there, but if you just say, Sean, you know you want me, you'll get the fucking reaction. And she was kind of crestfallen, okay. And when she said that, the people, well, fuck you.

You fucking douchebag. That was sometimes less is more and people have to understand how they need to portray themselves based on how that they may appear to others instead of how they appear to themselves. Is that a fair assessment say in some cases? I think so and I remember wrong. I thought it was I know that you want me and you're saying it was,

you know that you want me, but that's what I remember. I remember that line. I'm not even saying that's, but yeah, Sean, you know you want me. That was the delivery though I remember it though If she had given a whole speech It wouldn't have stood out as much Yes it was just matter of fact

You have to admit to all these people That I'm the hottest thing you've ever seen What an obnoxious bitch right And she She did win a beauty contest up there in Calgary In her younger days I'm not trying to say that she was ready For the fucking glue factory

Oh come on What's what's what? Well I'm not I'm trying to be careful here because I like Diana, but she wasn't the most beautiful girl and she wasn't Donna Fargo. Oh, no, she was the happiest girl. Who was the most beautiful girl in the whole USA?

No, that's the happiest girl. I don't know. You guys should have done something where Sean wasn't into her, but it turned that Jose was. Oh, for heavens. Now, Jose was married and had 17 children. It's a work. Who cares?

Well, the kids going to school. Oh, because that's what Stu said. My God. But, you know, the kids are in school up here, and you got Diana acting like some kind of whore. You know, they got to go to school and hear this from people. Everybody watches the TV. The hell is going on there with that stuff.

Diana looking like a whore. Well, of course, that TV went all over the world, and it's a different world now with TV and syndication and more specifically streaming and what's available where and who's available and what's going on and what words are coming out of my mouth, Jim, ExpressVPN. Loud noises rule the day here, ladies and gentlemen. And that's exactly what I was about to talk to you about when you talk about the worldwide situation with the streaming and the big tech companies and all of the things that they can do to you,

ladies and gentlemen, do you realize that not only these big tech companies, They're trying to jack you at a variety of financial ways, but they have flummoxed people. Apparently now, you know, I don't do this, Brian, because I still think that the Bolivian government is trying to track me to this. I'm going to give that another two to three years to die down. What? But a lot of people have cell phone, the smartphones these days. And the smartphones have things called privacy settings, right? where you can turn off the app tracking,

whatever that may be. See, this is all these newfangled buzzwords that the big tech companies have convinced you you can't live without when I do just fine without it. But apparently, even though you turn off the app tracking and fix your privacy settings, that's a bunch of bullshit. They still know where you are and what you're doing.

It's all a lie. and they can snoop in on you. Prying eyes, they're watching you. They know your every move. And they know what you're doing on the internet. They got your data. You know that unlimited data you get? They got it.

And they're going to do something with it. They're going to sell it to people. Just the other day I saw that someone's data was sold to black marketeers in Taiwan, who then collected that entire family and put them on a fucking boat over there and made them work their way across the Pacific Ocean. Where did you see this? It was on the news.

What news? Well, things people were talking about. That's the name of the news? That's the name of the news. What channel's that on? It's not really a channel. It's more of a neighborhood circular. But nevertheless, folks, if you want to avoid things like this happening to you being

Shanghai. and forced to work in indentured servitude on pontoon boats or anything in between, go to the folks at ExpressVPN because when you use the ExpressVPN app on your computer or your phone, you are hiding your address so that they can't come to your door anymore and knock on it and say, hey, get off that website. And the other websites can't use it to find out where you are at that point or what you're doing. So basically, right now, unless you're protected by ExpressVPN, they know when you're walking into a dildo store.

Because they got the GPS on you. A dildo store. And they say, well, they have, that guy has walked into the Adam and Eve Pleasure Palace in Montclair, Wisconsin. And if he, and then if you don't take that dildo home to your wife, they call your wife two days later to say, hey, how did you like that? like that dildo that Harry bought you. Well, first of all, none of this is true.

Well, he didn't give me any goddamn dildo. Well, he bought a dildo the other day because we got him tracked. See, now what they're going to do. And then they're going to start calling you and say, hey, Harry, unless you pay us a certain amount of money, we're going to call your wife. And we're going to tell her that you bought dildos for somebody else. No, this is not an...

You can imagine the trouble that you're going to get in without ExpressVPN. You're not going to get into any of this trouble. This is not a dildo snitching. kind of situation. I don't know why. Well, that's with the big tech companies that feed your information to other people. They're going to sell your information to a guy that's going to be on the phone

there and he's going to call your wife and say, hey, so-and-so is buying toys for another woman unless, of course, you pay the protection fee. But ExpressVPN will encrypt you to where when you walk into the

goddamn the dildo store, Well, your wife, if she gets a phone call, is going to think that you walked into the latest, the Target or Walmart or something to buy something for the family. And for a special extra small fee, they can tell your wife that every day you're walking into a flower shop and you just come home with a goddamn red rose for her. This is not how any of this works. Well, ExpressVPN will reroute and encrypt 100% of your online activity, so your internet provider, your Wi-Fi administrator, your hackers,

everybody's got hackers, none of them, and your wife can't see it. She'll think you're really in Bolivia. Or potentially the jungles of Switzerland. Do they have jungles up there? Again, some people just want to watch programs that are not available in their country, like the great British sewing bee, for instance. Why do you keep talking about that program like somebody's going to watch sewing on television? Suzanne's been trying to access that show forever.

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I was hoping you'd agree with me. I agree with some of the... Just don't let people know what you're doing. And, you know, these people, I'm telling you, did I ever tell you about the day that I was almost on the 6 o'clock news walking into the dildo store? No, I didn't know this is a place you frequented. Well, it was actually, it was just a random stop-by because I was in Connecticut. I was living in Connecticut working for the WWE at the time, as they were known, the WWF.

I thought there was a punchline. It's a real story. No, it's a real story. and so it was at the time where I was doing a third-party booking. We've talked about it. If the guys weren't booked, you know, the headbangers,

whoever, they could work third-party promoters. And I was also to have stone coals and the big stars. They would do the autograph sessions at these big malls they have had up there back then. I guess they still got them. And Austin was getting up to $25,000 to do three hours at a giant shopping mall and sign

thousand autographs or whatever, fucking what. But anyway, so I've got to go and have a meeting at a Chili's, and I wish I could remember the name of the road or the suburb of

our area, Huntington, Connecticut. It was the next town over. I'm going to meet this guy that ran these spot shows and some of these autograph signings at the mall. And as I'm driving over there. You always got to leave early

because you never know with the traffic up there. So I realize I'm going to get there early and just sit there twiddling my thumbs for 20, 30 minutes. But shit over here on the left-hand side is the Dildo store. Because they got a lot of local mom-and-pop-type adult entertainment establishments up there. Not your like Adam and Eve National Chains or whatever or Hustler Hollywood, but the good local stuff,

you know, no, where you, where, they appeal to the community. I don't know too many people call it the dildo store though. Well, you know, that's just a colloquialism. An adult bookshop. And I think, you know, I might, I've stopped in there because I might take home

a gift for my significant other of the time. And as I walk, I park and there's, really, there's no other cars to park a lot. It's, it's, you know, four o'clock on a weekday afternoon. maybe people have not got off a certain shift yet and gone to buy their marital aids. So I park right near the door and I walk in the front door and as I'm walking into the little hallway there before you turn left,

the guy behind the counter is right there and there's a television right behind him that's mounted on the wall. So right as I walk in as I walk past him, I said, hello, kind sir, dildo gentleman. How are you this fine dildo selling evening? when I look up at that TV I say is that my fucking car is that my like my Kentucky license plate

you know I never switched my goddamn car registration no matter where I live I said look at I said is that this business he said yeah the fucking live remote on the news is right across the street that parking lot over there they've been cutting in on us for the past hour where they had just passed some kind of local

law that they couldn't bother the the dildo gentleman or something was going on but they had just when I walked in a door closed behind me they had just cut in on the live cut in where they're doing yes we're across the street from you know a buford's dildo store where they just signed this law today and I would have been on actually on the live afternoon news in Connecticut

New York, for that matter, walking into the establishment. That doesn't happen all that often. No. All right. Well, that was quite a story. Well, who else do you know that can say that? If they were almost captured,

commemorated for all of posterity on the afternoon news walking into the dildo store. And with good intentions trying to buy a gift for someone else. I'll tell you a story. I think I may have told you years ago, the late Frank Idavia who ran Jersey All-Pro wrestling years earlier.

I remember Frank. Years earlier he had been a wrestler around New York. Was it lightning blue diamond? Not that Lou Diamond. I forget exactly what his name was, but then he also, he wrestled this fatty turnbuckle for a while.

And then he started Jersey All-Pro, but years earlier, there was an incident in Times Square where he went to a porno booth, and I guess he ran out of change and he tried to put his arm under to stop it from coming down and it locked his arm in

and you couldn't get it out and they had to call the fire department to get the jaws of life to get him out of there. Amazing. Can you imagine getting stuck like that? Amazing. Hey, at least it wasn't a glory hole.

I guess so, but this is the... Boy, I keep trying to come up with a way to get a better transition. We need something else. Well, I'll tell you. Here's another story while we're talking about it. So Bradshaw, JBL, and Dutch Mantel, and I think, I'm pretty sure it was Bob Holly, are in Germany. And for a tour, the WWF is running, this is the late 90s or, you know, whatever point in time where they were all there together.

And they go to the adult bookstore or whatever, and they, everything is in somewhat of a, foreign language, as you would imagine. But the point is, they go into peep show booths, and all of a sudden they hear, I want to say it was Holly, I'm pretty sure it was Bob Holly, about to puke and blah, blah, blah, blah, and he's out of that thing.

What the fuck? They both got the regular booths, and he got the booth with the German Shaitza video. And had a bad reaction to that. So they had to keep moving on. You have any other wrestlers in porno store stories? Not that I can say here, but if you call the hotline, we can be uncensored there. Well, Jim, our final story here this week.

Just make sure you're hooked up with ExpressVPN. This is your program, oh, great one. And it's time that we crack down or knuckle down or kneel down or bend over or whatever we got to do. to lift heaven and earth to make the folks happy out there in podcast land and go over the world of wrestling as only we do.

Well, again, there's a lot of things to talk about this week. We're going to talk about AEW Dynamite. We're going to talk about Tony Kahn's nutty behavior on Twitter. We're going to talk about who killed WCW, which I keep calling the death of WCW because I remember the book.

But before we get to your thoughts on Raw, Jim, why don't we let the listeners know maybe they're as hungry as I am right now? I haven't had breakfast. I'm starving. and I'm thinking about our sponsor and I'm getting more hungry by the moment. Well, you know what?

You know, I, people wonder why I like the old days so much back in the day, back in my time. That's when people ate steak and eggs for breakfast. You remember that? Give me out order a steak and eggs when they'd walk in the diner with the fucking fedora hat and there'd be fucking Lauren Bacall behind the goddamn slinging the fucking hash.

tell you what. Folks, you could eat, well, there you go. You can eat just whistle, but you can whistle for steak on any meal of the day, folks. Just whistle and just say, bring me some steak. Well, my lips are dry. So that means I need some steak sauce. And you can get all these things and more from our friends at Omaha Steaks. And Father's Day.

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anybody that you've spurned or spawned, I should say. What are you saying? I don't know what you're saying here. What I'm trying to say is everybody has a father. Right? You've spermed. Everybody has a father, but sometimes

I think you should get, some guy should get like eight fathers. Father's Day packages, because not only has he got some in the family, but also he's probably, there's a few he's probably not even been accused of. Just go ahead and get every guy in the whole neighborhood. Father's Day packages from Omaha Steaks, you'll have everybody covered. Everybody wants to eat steak. And gift packages are starting at just $99, folks, for the incredible premium proteins like the juicy pork chops, the air-chilled cheese. and the beefy burgers, and of course, the main course, the Omaha Steaks.

They got the sirloins, they got the bacon-wrapped fillet, they got all kinds of stuff. All the cuts, they, what part of the cow do they not use over there at Omaha Steaks, Brian? The ears. They don't use the ears. But I'll tell you what, you need to keep your ears open for good deals like this, so we can get you $10 off. if you go to Omaha steaks.com right now and order the mouthwatering gift packages for Father's Day

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Doesn't even need to be your father. You're going to starve your mother to death? What kind of person is not going to want to feed their mother? Well, you mean, if you're buying it for your dad, there's so much food he's going to probably want to cook it and share it with the rest of the family. Well, maybe he lives alone. Maybe he's off in the woods somewhere.

Maybe the family is driven him to something like this. You're trying to make up to him somehow. So you can't just assume he, might be going to just stick all this food in his own gullet. He may have a tough time getting a deliverer. He's off in the woods somewhere. Well, he could be up in a high-rise condominium. And, you know, he could still be living alone. Maybe mom found somebody else. Maybe she got some different cuts of meat. So you never, you can just spread the packages all around, folks. Gift packages starting at just $99.

and when you use the promo code JCE at checkout, you're going to get $10 off your order. I don't know how much more we can do to feed America. It's a good time too. It's barbecue season. Well, and there you go. So then, well, now, and here's the thing, though, dad's going to have to barbecue it.

He'll probably insist. Most dads want to do the barbecuing. But that's another way. You get one over on the old fart. You get him the meat, but then he has to go out and cook it for everybody. You're sitting back lazy asses just eating it. Oh, fuck you for Father's Day, Dad, cook dinner. See how these people are?

What do you mean these people? Well, these fucking families out here that are making poor dad cook fucking dinner on Father's Day. All right, well, just like on Father's Day is a lawnmower somewhere in the background. Ormah State's promo code J-C-C-E. for delicious juicy steaks. Mouth watering steaks. Mouth watering, yes. Every time you eat something from Omaha steaks

for the next day or two, you're just fucking slobbering all over yourself. I don't know how they do it. Speaking of swayback mules. There are a lot of mules. And of course, sometimes when you're on your mule, you need some supplies. You need something awesome.

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You might need to cut something or light something or you might need to see or hear or drink or eat. And there's a variety of things and address. You can't just run around naked as a J-bird, just buck-necked out there. You've got to have things to wear around you and wrap yourself in, garb yourself with. These are the kind of things that come

in the Box of Awesome from Box of Awesome.com. Every month, there are various items from small businesses, up-and-coming brands, mom-and-pop shops. Sometimes mom and pop even let son and daughter in, niece and nephew, maybe even cousin and cousiness. No cousins. They says here, no cousins.

No cousin. Well, that's because there is no cousiness. So how do you know the sex of your cousin? Well, nevertheless, we don't want to talk about that now. But much less talking about having sex with your cousin, folks, you can talk about the many fine items you get when you become a member of the monthly deliveries from boxofawson.com Across a ton of different categories, they have a plethora of products. You get a stellar discount on everything, and you get that good feeling deep down inside.

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They go back later on to thank these people. They're gone. You never know where they are. No, once again, Box of Awesome is working with reputable small businesses, mom and pop shops all throughout the land to bring you the finest curated products that you would not normally find. It's a wonderful deal. I did not besmirch any of the character of these fine people. They're disadvantaged.

they're starting out. They may not have rent for a brick and mortar store. They set up out of the trunk of their car on the side of the road in the middle of the city somewhere, away from prying eyes, and they do their own type of business. Away from prying, what are you imagining over there? Box of Awesome brings the truck and the trailer,

and they load that stuff up, and they drive it, and they ship it to you. Again, it's a fantastical story that then turns into a blatant lie. Box of Awesome has nothing to do with whatever it is you're describing. Well, there's no lie. going on with boxofawsome.com because it's free to join and you wouldn't have to lie about that that proves my point and they release new items every month as I mentioned and right now you can get a free mystery gift with your first monthly shipment when you sign up at boxofawsome.com and enter the code jCE at checkout you just you go there you tell them the kind of things you like

they pick things for you and they send them to you and when you open up the box you You're going to be amazed and astonished. You're going to feast your eyes and fantasize on the wonderful array and cornucopia of fine items that are contained therein and a free mystery gift. And that's the thing. When they got that truck going down the street and they see boxes sitting there and they don't know what the fuck's inside them and there's nobody tending them,

they'll just grab them and throw them in the back of their truck and they pass the savings on to you. No, there's a truck. They have not even, they've not even opened these boxes themselves. There may be a kilo of cocaine in one of these boxes. No, there will not be a kilo of cocaine in a box that you get in the mail from Box of Awesome. Well, you never know what they might find on the side of the street. It's a mystery gift.

Who's they? Well, you say what they will find at the side of the street. The people that Box of Awesome contracts to find the mystery gifts. You know, most of the time, you know what's a mystery gift. It's not a mystery gift. unknown. Nobody knows, right? It's a mystery. And who would want to solve a mystery that didn't involve something valuable like a kilo of cocaine or something? If it's just an old pop bottle, nobody's even want to solve the mystery. Fine products from mom and pop from small businesses,

cool stuff. I love it. You'll love it too. Box of awesome. They have a promise no cocaine. Don't worry about that. No cocaine. No cocaine. Lots of awesome. Jim. please tell the listeners how they can get the Box of Awesome. Well, you just go to Box of Awesome.com and enter the code JCE at checkout, and you will get a free mystery gift, not containing cocaine, with your first monthly shipment. That's when you do that thing at Box of Awesome.com entering the code JCE at checkout. No cocaine. What about LSD?

No illicit drugs of any sort, just lots of list. it fun? No, I guess that wouldn't be the word. Listen, listen, listen, listen. You will have fun. You will have, listen, Mr. Listen. Listen. About Box of Awesome, one more time.

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Lots of awesome. You know, weed's legal in some states. I wonder if that could be a mystery gift. No weed. Plenty of Awesome. Mystery gifts include no narcotics. Box of Awesome. Awesome is a lot.

all natural ingredients. No, no pharmaceuticals. Awesomeness. That was the season finale of Dynasty, known as Monday Night Raw. And Jim, on the topic of Monday Night Raw, there has to be a transition. On the topic of Monday Night Raw, maybe you got through seeing all these gruesome murders. You had a lot of questions. Maybe you needed to call somebody. Well, I thought you were going with maybe you needed a a razor to fend yourself against the slasher's. But I'll go with this. Folks, if you are ever backstated in your hair like coffee.

Yes. And if you are ever backstage at a major television production when suddenly and for no reason a band of mutants begins slaughtering everyone producing the program, you're going to need a way to call for help. And you don't want to pay a lot for your phone plan because after all, if you do, survive this massacre, you may have extensive medical bills and you'll need your bank account.

So I've got a way that you can only pay $15 a month and still have a telephone that you can call for help and text for help and you get the unlimited high speed data. You could even ask it for how to be helped and it will answer you like the young folks do with their phone. You hold the phone up and you say, how can I? be helped. And the phone will say, call 911 and have the police come and help you.

It's not that hard. But folks, that's all through mintmobile.com because that's where you get the $15 month phone plan when you purchase the three month plan. I know we've been talking about this for weeks now. You get all the high speed data, the unlimited talk, the unlimited talk, the unlimited text,

the nation's largest 5G network. Brian, do you realize that? There's a lot of 5G networks out there, but none of them are as big and as erect as this 5G network with Mint Mobile that they use. And you can use your own phone, and you can bring your own phone number.

Bring several people's phone numbers. Have a party. You can bring your own phone number. Let's just stop right there. Let's call some people and say sexy things to them on the phone overnight with the lights turned low. Sexy things? You can do that with Mint Mobile too. Maybe they could even send you a picture of their various orifices because you get the unlimited data and text and porn and all that stuff you get on the phone.

Again, that's not exactly how it works and we don't want to get into specific genres of entertainment because different services I assume would have different. fees, but we're talking about what you can get for a great plan, a great affordable plan for your own phone, as you said, and your own phone number. There's so many wonderful options. Mint Mobile. Yes, I'm talking about not professionals, but if you know somebody that's a talented amateur, they can just take a picture of their various hoo-haz and sending them right over to you because you get the unlimited 15 bucks a month. Boy, howdy. If you get a picture a day, that's only like 50 cents.

for, you know... Again, I don't think that's how it works, and we're talking unlimited data, not unlimited hoo-ha, and we're talking about a great phone plan with Mint Mobile. But you can take pictures with a phone and send them to other people

with another phone, can't you? Right, but we suggest... Unlimited talk and text and data. If solicited, we suggest that you don't send unsolicited nude photos to anyone using any data that is free or otherwise. Well, not unsolicited. I think you ought to just send them to break the ice.

Make them. I send one to everybody you know. Bad idea. The chances are greater that somebody would write back and say, hey, I like that. Send me some more. The chances are greater that you will lose all your friends. Don't do any of this.

Well, just don't, not any of your friends that have their own. To anyone. If you've got a friend that doesn't have one of their own, they might want to see a picture of yours. Leave the people. But I'll tell you what you can do. You can say bye bye to your overpriced wireless place. jaw dropping monthly bills and unexpected

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or phone calls to Nana You never know Again most people are normal My Nana are you calling my Nana on the phone I'm gonna send her photos I'm not gonna call her It's the modern day No we're not gonna be calling anyone's nannas

You may want to call your own Nana Or you may want to do things that don't involve dirty photos There are plenty of options That don't involve dirty photos I didn't say anything about dirty They're tastefully done Well Mitt Mobile

There was a pink parasol right in front of MintMobile tastefully will help you one more time. One more time, Jim what's that promo code? Mintmobile.com slash JCE.15 bucks a month

for all these services. All right, and we're going to get to the I guess the case of Tony Con servicing himself known as AEW dynamite momentarily. I wanted to ask you about something because I recently bumped into this. It popped up in my feet on like

Facebook. And then I mentioned it on the 605 Scott Cornish special, and Brian Solomon said the same thing. I just saw this, but it's not new. Have you ever seen the video of the Australian guy arrested who yells Democracy Manifest? No, I have no idea. You mentioned that phrase to me earlier at a break, and I said, I have no idea what you're talking about. This is the greatest thing. This guy was arrested, false identity. They got the wrong guy. Not that he was using a false eye. They got the wrong guy. This guy was sitting in the middle of the day in Australia eating Chinese food and they barged in with a camera crew from the news and arrested him. And it's not the person, he's not the person that they thought he was.

According to him, he has no idea what the fuck is happening, but he gets dragged outside and he sees the camera crew. I'll send you the video after the fact. The first thing he does where they walk him back to the car, this is the different shit, cops there, cops here. The door is open and the guy says, you're under arrest, he shuts the door of the car. Well, let's go to this audio so you can hear what we're talking about, and we'll see what you think. But you just assured me that I could speak. Sit down and inside the car. We're not assuring anything.

I'm under arrest. I'm under what? Gentlemen, this is debocracy. Tata! And farewell. Well, there it is. He's turning the cop card. What the fuck?

He's narrating his own imprisonment. Like a fucking Shakespearean narrate is Maurice Evans. Out here with the... Tata and farewell as they lift him and throw him into the back seat of the car. Do we have any idea of what his occupation, who he might have been? I watched, I got obsessed with this and I watched every video there was and they like did a, where are they now, Democracy Manifest guys, succulent Chinese meals, another favorite from that. And they found him and he's older now.

He was, he says just a starving artist. He said they ran in there. They said like, he's an international criminal. He's like, I'm a starving artist. I do plays and stuff. And the funny thing is in the current stuff, which is from a couple years ago, he's now doing paintings. He paints things. He's talking about how he does paintings. And I didn't even realize he to first behind him or his paintings, and every painting is a painting of him being arrested.

And now he's like mixing it up. So now it's like him now arresting him then. Bizarar, just a bizarre thing, but something that's made me laugh a lot in the last couple weeks. Well, it's easy to tickle you. That's right. A succulent Chinese meal. A succulent Chinese meal will do it. Succulent is a funny sounding word. Some words aren't funny. Some words are funny.

He says, get your hand off my penis, and it's just a guy next to him. I think that's who he's talking to. The guy gets like a little bashful. Like, oh, shit. You know, there's a camera right here. Either that or maybe it was Rush that was next to him, and he was really grabbing his fucking... His dong. You know what Paul Heyman wished that was laying on top of that a now?

desk when he got power bombed on it by those vicious Samoans and Or Tongans? Pastrami. A helix sleep mattress. That's my second pick. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, if you're a heel wrestling manager about to turn baby face and you're morbidly obese and elderly and a group of angry pissed-off Samoans are going to power bomb you through the announced desk, put a helic sleep mattress on top of that bad boy, and you will fall into Dreamland.

while at the same time you are being power bombed into oblivion. Because the Helix sleep mattress can make anything comfortable. It can cushion any blow. Let's say that you're another hardcore garbage wrestler that wants to dive off the balcony and put some son of a bitch through a toilet seat head first the wrong way. Well, if you put a Helic sleep mattress down underneath all that stuff, you're just going to bounce right back to your feet like you were bouncing.

bouncing on air, because that's the secret of the Helix Sleep mattress. Did you know, Brian, that most of the Helix Sleep mattress is air? Because air and oxygen are part of our daily life. And so that's why you just fall asleep like you're floating on a cloud in any of the models of Helix mattresses, the ones with memory foam layers, labors. Memory phone labor. This is something I want to hear more about. You can also go into labor on these mattresses.

Memory foam layers. Provide optimal pressure relief if you sleep on your side. They've got a model with more responsive foam to cradle your body like a little baby with essential support in the stomach and back sleeping positions. They've got cooling features. They've got spinal features. They can give you a spinal tap on a helix sleep mattress. you'll never feel it.

Were you aware of that, Brian? I don't think that's in any way a proven thing. Now, again, let's just make sure we differentiate between helix sleep mattresses and whatever would cause someone need a spinal tap. They had nothing to do with one another.

If you were sleeping on a helic sleep mattress your whole life, you wouldn't need those pesky spinal taps. That's another thing you got going for you. Nor anal probes, because helic sleep mattresses cradle you in such a position that you digest your food much more effectively. And folks, they come with a 10 or 15 year warranty depending on the model, and you can keep one of these bad boys in your home for a hundred nights and sleep on it or eat on it or do all the other things people do on a mattress on it. And if you don't like it, they'll give you

your money back and they'll sell it to somebody else who will appreciate it and give it a new home. No, no, no, let's not say that because we don't know anything about what they do with any return mattresses. We shouldn't even focus on return mattresses. I can't even say it. We shouldn't focus on return mattresses. We should focus on good things like how comfortable these mattresses are, how wonderful they are. We have a few here in the house. I know you have some over there.

Everyone loves them. We love sleeping on them. The big thing people think of with mattresses. Harley loves them too. All right. Good for Harley loves them. She sleeps on her. her back and does the dead bug thing with her feet up in the air every time she gets on a

helix mattress well you know that you know the reason why you don't hear about any return mattresses that helix then has to repurpose some that's because there are none nobody in their right mind would send this back it's a bargain at twice the price and right now ladies and gentlemen our friends at helix and that's h-e-l-l-x it's like felix but get the f out Helix is offering up to 30% off all mattress orders and two free pillows because you can't have a mattress without a pillow. They go together like peanut butter and jelly. And all you got to do is go to helixleep.com slash JCE. That is helix sleep.com slash JCE.

And you're going to get up to 30% off all the mattress orders and the two free pillows. and potentially you'll be able to cushion the blow should you get thrown out of your bed through the Spanish and ounce desk. And Brian, I'll tell you, I think that that's the best deal they can give you. Not only protecting your body from injury and giving you a good night's sleep,

but up to 30% off and the pillows. And you can put one behind your head and one between your legs, and then you'll be all curled up. Imagine if Haman had a Helix sleep mattress the night before. He looked like you didn't have any sleep. If he had had some sleep on a helix sleep mattress, maybe he would have had the energy to, you know, run and grab a hot tub.

To run away? It's going to stand there. To jump the rail. Yeah, to turn into 1989. Paul dangerously all over again. Jump the rail. He couldn't have jumped that rail in 1989. He'd have tripped and fallen.

But nevertheless, that's a good point there. If he had had a good night's sleep, or maybe he had the. two free pillows that Helix sleep gives you, along with the up to 30% off the mattress orders, stuffed in the front of his pants thinking that they were going to somehow give him a bump on his face and he was going to be padded and they went the other way. And that's why his stomach was so large. Did you ever think of that?

You can't get past the stomach thing. I had 25 pounds on him 35 years ago and now the worm has turned. but anyway, your worm's going to turn. Folks, if you've got worms, they enjoy sleeping on a Helix sleep mattress, so you'll please the whole family and all of your parasites. Helixleep.com slash JCE. That's their best offer yet. Don't expect it to last long.

So they're our longest running sponsor. We love them around here at Helix. We think about them every night. Around here at Helix? You said around here at Helix. You worked there? We love them around here. Here, Helix Sleep is what I was.

We love them around here. And then I named the people that we love Helix Sleep. We love them. Because we think about them every time we lay our little heads down for a good night's sleep. And you should, too. I do. Now I'm talking about the Royal You out of the listeners. I am the Royal You.

I'm a king. I know what you're thinking about when you lay down and go sleep. You're thinking about getting up early the next morning and screwing somebody. That's what you're doing. again, I don't know why you say some of these things that you say. You're a capitalist pig. No, I'm not. Yes, you are. You're all about making money.

You ought to join me down here in the fucking communist enclave I got going on here. We're distributing all of our wealth to each other. Harley's got something. She gives it to me. I got something I give it to Stacy. Stacey got something she gives it to Harley. What about Hachkis? Hachkis don't get shit.

Hachkis is one of the workers. Is it not how communism is supposed to work? Mr. Marks, you're supposed to give the money to the workers? No, we're giving the money to each other. We're sharing our wealth to each other. So it's private communism? Yes, it's private communism. That's why it's an enclave around here.

But Hotchkis don't get shit. I don't leave him anything but alone. Well, there it is, Jim, a commercial episode, all commercials, none of the talk. but again something that the listeners love the commercials omnibus volume five it's just like network television all commercials no content that's exactly right except people actually demand this and we have more coming in the future more commercials any final words here this week jim yes i've just seen on the internet

the tribes that have never had contact with civilization are being filmed by drones in the Amazon. We got to figure out a way to sell them sponsors. All right, we'll figure out something there. But again, we thank all of our sponsors, current, and even ones in the past. Thank you for supporting the show. And, of course, thank you to all the listeners who support the sponsors who support our shows. But we're just a big bunch of supporters, aren't we? You can support us on the experience in the drive-thru, wherever you find your favorite podcast. And until then, for Jim Cornett, I'm the great Brian last. Tallyho!

You know,