Jocko Podcast - Jocko Underground: Taking Pleasure in Other Peoples Pain | Guys Looking to Start Trouble Everywhere You Go

Episode Date: October 10, 2022

Taking pleasure in other people's pain: SchadenFreude.You might be the lightning rod.Managing a long-distance relationship during college years.Should you attend Jiu Jitsu class even if you can't participate?Getting the team to be motivated to do hard things.Dealing with opposing financial philosophies in a marriage.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/jocko-podcast/exclusive-content

This is Jocko Underground Podcast. And we actually have an Echo Charles topic, which is strange because you always send me topics. And look, I open them with the, you know, you'll send me an email. It'll say UG topics. And I'll open it up with a good attitude. I'll have a positive attitude. Cool. But it's been pretty rare so far that they make the cut.

Now, maybe one of our topics could be Echo Charles. Matter of fact, maybe we'll do that next time. I'll just go through the topics and see what you were thinking when these came in mind. Also, I'd like to say this, if there's something that a listener is that you'd like to hear us discuss, send it in. Not just a question, but say, hey, we'd like to hear your discussion on this topic. So the topic that you sent me was Schadenfreuden, Schadenfreude. I think that's how you say it. Shadenfreude.

Shadenfreude. You sent me this topic. Hey, well, let's talk about this. And it's a pretty, it's a pretty popular topic. Yeah, maybe popular, strong words. You hear it occasionally. It's a German word. That's the combination of two words.

The first word, it's Shaden, which is damage or harm. And Freuda, which is joy. So this is when you, as a person, are finding joy in someone else's suffering. So it seems to be something that people like to experience on the interwebs, right? You can kind of watch bad things happen to people. I mean, there's a whole. There's a thing called fail, like fail TV and fail army, right? Just watching people eat shit in a bunch of various different ways on skateboards, on mountain bikes, on water ski.

in vehicles. That's sort of the ultimate form of Schadenfreude, right? It's kind of the moment, well, I mean, maybe not the, it's a pure form. You are literally watching people suffer. Or like when a kid, here's a classic one where the kid swings a bit, you know, the dad and the kid, right? And then the baseball bat or they're playing baseball or whatever, kid hits the baseball and hits a dad in the nuts. Yeah. That's the classic one.

Classic. So those are kind of, quite frankly, those are kind of like a little bit innocent kind of funny, humorous versions of this. But there are some, you know, when I was looking this up, trying to just get a little more of a better understanding of it. The psychological driving forces, because this can be a real thing. Psychological driving forces are aggression, rivalry, and sometimes justice. You think about that one. Well, like when you see, here's a classic one, going back to the same kind of knucklehead stuff. you see the person that's driving

and they do some asshole move and then they hit a freaking you know a bridge of bunkman or whatever yeah kind of you know like I got what you deserved so when I worked at the nightclub downtown you'd see you know people show out downtown right and you say show out yeah show out like getting all dressed up and whatnot

no it's like is it is it different than show off yeah a little bit what's the difference show out means like essentially for like a better way of putting it making a scene. Okay. Good or bad. Okay.

You know? Yeah. So guys would like when they leave, they'll peel out, right? Making it all smoky and loud, making this just showing out, right? And they peel out, right? And then you'd see sometimes, because a lot of cops down down, you'll see the cop. Turn on his night, you know, and go chase him. Everyone would cheer.

It's weird. Everyone on the streets cheering. Just, Jaden Freud. All day, man. Justice. Justice for that person. So that can do it. And so why did you what made you want to discuss this?

Was it some particular case that you saw? No, no. It was just like the like a psychological kind of condition that's like it seems bad. But then there's it probably goes so deep in which to me I didn't know I didn't realize all of this stuff that you already said. Yeah. Well here's what when you asked about it's like okay cool. So we'll talk about what it is and I think everyone can kind of understand it. But I wanted to take something.

I want to say positive way from it, but I wanted to get a legitimate lesson learned from it. Here's the legitimate lesson learned as I started thinking about this feeling. It is such a good indicator of your own station in life, your own security, your own confidence, your own, for lack of a bit of a word, happiness, right? So if I'm seeing echo and I see you freaking whatever, you get, you crash your car.

And I'm like, I kind of feel good about it. What does that say about me? If I see, if you get fired from your job, if your girlfriend dumps you and I kind of feel good about it, why is that? Well, it's because I'm insecure. It's because I'm not happy and I want you to be suffering as well. You know, I got for a while thinking that,

you know, certain guys in the SEAL teams wouldn't want to see other guys succeed. I told you that story about Seth wanting to go to Princeton and guys like, no, you shouldn't go to ruin your career. I'm like, bro, how is going to Princeton going to ruin your career? What are you? That's insane. Like, go to Princeton.

You'll have a degree. But people didn't want them to get that leg up, right? So it's sort of like a check engine light for your soul. And if you're walking around and you see other people suffering and it brings you joy, you got issues that you need to look at. for yourself and you need to check yourself. Now there's a, once I got in the rabbit hole of this thing, there's another word, another tough to pronounce German word,

but it's related. It's called gluk schmertz. And what this is, this is when you're mad about someone else's good luck. Oh, Echo got a new job. You're mad about it. You know, oh Echo just freaking got a new house and you're mad about it. Same thing, in my opinion, if you feel, Feel this way, you need to check your soul.

This is a red light and to check engine light on your soul. When I got the house that I live in now, which was a long time ago, it was actually 10, almost 12, almost 11 years ago, I got the house I live in now. House I live in now is in a cool, very cool location. I could barely afford it. I did crazy things to get into that house. And one of the, you know, not like a close friend,

but of, you know, under the family type individual had stopped you know was walking down the street and knew that we had got or whatever and walked in there and immediately started telling me like oh the traffic you know it's going to be loud you a lot of salt corrosion because by the oh they'll be like just point out all these negative things started hating oh was hating thank you for bringing to the parlance of our times right was hating on it you could not be mad at this house I mean, unless you're, you could not be. You know, it's it, you could not be.

And I remember thinking, damn, this dude is bummed that I got, that I got this house in this location. So what's the location, right? The house was kind of crappy. Wasn't that crappy, though? I mean, it was not bad. Wasn't heinous. Yeah.

Was livable. You know what I'm saying? But the location was good to go. So, but then the funny thing is stoner came by. And I was like, hey, dude, I got, I got, because I didn't want to jinx it. And so I told him, I'm like, hey, man, I'm, I'm in escrow for a house. And he's like, where is it? I'm like, I don't know.

And I was like, oh, it's down by the water. We'll be, you know. But I didn't want to tell him because I want to jinx it. Yeah. Superstition style. So finally I got, I go, I go, hey, man, come and see the new house. And he's like, where is it? And I send him to like the pin drop.

And he's like, damn. So he comes over and I'm already there. And he walks in dude and you could see like big smile ear to ear smile on his face. He's like dude. We're set for him. It was like we bought it. He was our house. You know what I'm saying? But he was like super stoked. He had the opposite of gluck schmerts. So if you're one of these people if you're getting bitter then then you have an issue and where I I again you kind of sent me a little bit of a thought tornado because here's what's going on in my opinion once again if I'm looking at you and I'm kind of mad that you're getting lucky when I look at myself I realize there's I'm not I'm letting myself down somehow right I'm bummed like I remember actually you know stoner ended up getting a house in the neighborhood that I was in and it wasn't quite as badass but it was freaking legit.

And I was so stoked for him. So he was stoked for me. I was stoked for him, right? That's the way it's supposed to be. Some people be all bummed out when their friends are winning. If you're bummed out when your friends are winning, you're probably, you got issues,

but I think the issue that you have is you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing. You're not working hard. You're not reaching your potential. And that is, so you have the pent up, aggression towards people that are being successful and that's a bummer. So watch out for those. Again, I think both these things, they're good things to pay attention to because if you're

feeling them, if you're feeling joy when someone is suffering or you're feeling anger when someone is winning, you got issues. Pay attention to it. Do you feel like a little bit of that is natural? Well, that's the thing. there are natural psychological driving forces that I that I read about which is you know our natural human aggression right like we're sizing each other up we're we're competitors in life right that's what I feel so that is a natural thing that we're going to have we have a natural rivalry for resources and for

you know mates at an animal so that is a little excerpt of what we are doing on the the Jocko Underground podcast. So if you want to continue to listen, go to jocco underground.com and subscribe. And we're doing this. We're doing this to mitigate our reliance on external platforms. So we are not subject to their control. And we are doing this so that we can support the Jocko podcast,

which will remain as is free for all, as long as we can keep it that way. But we are doing this so we don't have to, under the control of sponsors and we're doing it so we can give you more control more interaction more direct connections better communications with us and to do that we are we're building a website right now where we'll be able to utilize to strengthen this legion of troopers that are in the game with us so thank you it's jocco underground dot com it costs eight dollars and eighteen cents a month and if you can't afford

to support us we can still support you just email assistance at jocco underground.com and we'll get you taken care of until then we will see you mobilized underground