Joe and Jada - Angie Martinez IRL - Emma Grede: Know Your Worth - In Business and in Love

Episode Date: April 23, 2026

Entrepreneur and author Emma Grede joins Angie Martinez to talk about the inspiration behind her book “Start With Yourself,” how women can advocate for themselves and control their finances, and what it’s like to be a leader of a company. Plus, Emma responds to a fan who wants to know how to ask your employer for a raise or to be compensated in a way they deserve.Visit your nearest Boost Mobile store or https://promo.boostmobile.com/webuilt...All lines provided by ‪Hard Rock BetSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed Human. In 2023, Bachelor star Clayton Eckerd was accused of fathering twins. But the pregnancy appeared to be a hoax. You doctored this particular test twice, Ms. Owens, correct? I doctored the test ones. It took an army of internet detectives to uncover a disturbing pattern. Two more men who'd been through the same thing.

Greg Gillespie and Michael Mancini. My mind was blown. I'm Stephanie Young. this is Love Trapped. Laura, Scottsdale Police. As the season continues, Laura Owens finally faces consequences. Listen to Love Trapped podcast

on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. When a group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist, they take matters into their own hands. I vowed, I will be his last target. He is not going to get away with this. He's going to get what he deserves.

We always say, you know, trust your girlfriends. Listen to the girlfriends. Trust me, babe. On the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. What's up, everyone? I'm Ago Vodam. My next guest, it's Will Ferrell. My dad gave me the best advice ever.

He goes, just give it a shot. But if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun, anymore, it's okay to quit. If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration. It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat. Just hang in there. Yeah, it would not be. Right, it wouldn't be that.

There's a lot of luck. Listen to Thanks Dad on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. In New York, Lorena Borjas, protectia Latinas that have learned to survive three times. As women trans, as immigrants

and as sexual. I'm going to get to get to get like a perr, but when

he was, it was a fourth battle to prosperer in a world of a menace

of Queens in the app IHeard Radio, Apple Podcasts, or don't see that you

identified your own anger issues and then went and then got help for of anger issues. Nice.

Nobody, like, nothing terrible happened. Nobody had to intervene. Yeah, because I knew that that wasn't matching up to the life that I wanted. I wouldn't be able to take me, my little angry, crazy girl, cell, and do the things that I wanted to do. And that was so clear to me. I was like, this is not going to roll. This is not going to work in a workplace.

Hey, guys, this episode is brought to you by Boost Mobile. When you look at the word boss, I mean, her face should just appear. As a young kid in London, she was born an entrepreneur. She built billion-dollar brands like Good American and Skims all while being a wife and a mother of four. She's a trailblazer in business, breaking barriers. Her debut book, Start With Yourself, is out now and it got gems in it. Emma, Greed is our guest today on IRA, ladies a gentleman. Thank you.

Emma, you are out here working. I am out in these streets. I don't know if my algorithms gives me you. My algorithm serves me. I'm angling my way to you, Angie. I'm not getting me closer. No, no, but you are working. We met recently for the first time.

Not that recently. It was a year ago? Was it a year ago? At the Skims store launch here in New York. You were busy though. You were around with your friends and I was like, I and cheese, nice to meet you. No, you were already like, no, they came up to me and they were like, Emma Greed would like to meet you. I was like, I would love to meet her.

I did. I have no shame. Anyone I want to meet, I'm like, I want to meet her. Can you introduce me? Do you know her? I think it was Tiana Taylor or somewhere. I was just literally like, I want to meet Angie. Oh, it's so sweet.

It was lovely. But yes, we didn't have a time to connect. I think from that moment, even to now, from last year to now, has your life changed tremendously? Or is just from the outside that it seems like it's changed tremendously? That is a great question. You know, my life hasn't changed at all. Really?

But it's so funny because I don't know that my life feels like it's changed for a really long time. You know, there's such an interesting. interesting, like, perception that's out there. And honestly, it's one of the reasons that I wrote this book, because I honestly feel like people see one version of you and the reality of your life is so different. So I was like, let me write a book. It tells the truth about actually my life and what it is. It's not just a book, though. It's the podcast. It's your public presence is way more significant than it was a year ago. For real, but my work life hasn't changed. My life hasn't changed. And that's what I mean. I think the perception does a funny. thing. You know what it's like if you have a bit of a following and people see you on social media, they conflate the two things. They imagine that you like ran into your office, took a picture at your desk and went about your day. It's like, no, I am working. Like I'm actually working. I go in, I work in a role, I have a job. And so it's interesting that people have become much

more interested in me. But the reality of my life is it hasn't changed very much at all. But your profile? The profile has shifted. And that I'm very aware of. It's purpose. for. I think I'm trying to do it in a way where I can equate what I've got now with some impact because I really know that there's so much that I can do and I'm very, very focused. Yeah. Sometimes fame, because it's not fame you're really after, but it's fame comes with the profile that you now have. And I just wonder if it's, I don't know, done anything to you, surprised you in any way, challenging to manage. You know, for me, it's so interesting because all I get is amazing.

women. You know, I'm not like famous, famous. So no one's like checking for what I'm wearing. I live like a normal, a normal life. What I get is women will stop me on the street. They will slide me little notes in restaurants. I got this beautiful note from this lady the other day. And I could have cried. I was interviewing someone at the time. So I couldn't read it. I put it in my bag. I got home and I was like, you know, she said, you know, she was like, Emma, you have to understand how much you mean to women like me, how much you mean to women who come from a place where they might not have had the right start, but they are working and they're trying.

And it was so heartfelt. And she was so, first of all, she didn't even put her name or a contact detail on there. She just wanted me to know. And so I get a lot of that. And that, of course, I never used to get, you know.

But at the end of the day, it's like, my life is still the same. My life is a series of problems every single day. That's funny. No one calls me to say, everything's going right. You know, we're selling out. They only call me with problems.

And so it hasn't changed all that much. You have to know that that. this book is set up for a humongous success. I mean, do you see that already? Is that all? I hope so, yes. I mean, so far, listen, I'm, I'm a day in, so I don't want to come at this with too much. You have poured it so much in here that I really want to use this as like, I don't know, just the frame of our conversation today. Thank you. And then somewhere in the beginning you mentioned women being exhausted. Exhausted. Right. Exhausted. Somewhere in the beginning of it, you said that. And I thought, yes, women are exhausted because. It's career. It's emotional health. It's family. It's mother parenting. It's love. All of the things. It's relentless. We're getting so much thrown at us all the time that I thought I'm going to write a book that people use, not that they read, because we've got enough to do. And so it was really important to me that people would read this and then they would get something and they could put it into action in their lives.

I love how honest you are in the book about some of the, you know, anger and forgiveness and your way of navigating some real life thing. So we'll go through that. But in the scheme of business and money, I've heard you many times talk about. My favorite subject. Is it really? Yeah, it is. Money. Yeah. I want it to be every woman's favorite subject. That's the aim. I'm working on that. This is a big mistake I've made in my life, right? It's like I can. Is it still like that? Yes. It's because I came from a family and a mentality of, you know, money isn't everything. Money can't, shouldn't control you. Money is the root of all evil.

Yes, yes, yes, yes. You know, all they care about is money. You know, like, really. And it's not that I don't enjoy money. Some of that is true. It's like money doesn't solve all your problems, but it solves all your money problems. And I feel like we have to advocate for it for ourselves because no one's coming to find you. No one's coming to give you money or power or any of that. And I do feel like as women,

we have to take a level of responsibility for the fact that we don't talk about money as to why it eludes us. Why does it miss us? Why are men paid so much more than women? Why is that the case that it's so much easier for men to raise money than it is for women? And we all know that there are systemic barriers, there are systems that keep us small. But at the end of the day, we also have a part to play in all of that. And I want us to recognise that and recognise that we can change our behavior and get more of it. What are we doing wrong? What is the number one thing we do wrong? We are not talking about it. Now, we're just not talking about it. How does that look?

What does that look like in real time? First of all, it's like education. I think about myself as always in learning mode. Every day I'm learning something. And I learned about money because much like you, I didn't come from a place where, A, we had any money. So there wasn't that much to talk about. It was always that, what don't we have? Where are we going to spend? What we don't have? How we keeping the lights on that? That's what I learned. But when I got into the professional environment, it was always like, you don't share with your colleagues what you earn. You don't talk about money. That's crass. And actually what I think that we need to do is put money right in the centre of our plans. We need to say, I am worth this. This is what I should

be being paid. And we need to educate ourselves. So you need to understand your mortgage. You need to understand your investment planning. You need to understand what's in your future. And if you don't know, you've got to get to know. You've got to make it your business. Because money and power, they're linked, right? Inextricably linked. And we're in a place and time in the world right now where we actually need more women in positions of power. But again, it's not going to happen without us.

It's not going to happen passively. It's our responsibility to say, you know what? I need more of this. And I'm going to advocate for myself, and I'm going to educate myself, and I'm going to learn as much as I possibly can. And that's what I do all the time. I ask questions. Hey, guys, today's show is brought to you by our presenting sponsor.

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How do you navigate? Because it's a little different when I think about what you do in business, but you're also a creative. Hello, I'm a creative businesswoman. You are a creative businesswoman. For sure, no. And so I think sometimes where creative is concerned,

like what comes first, the creative or the opportunity to make money, you know, I don't know, I just, I just wonder how you navigate that. Or all money ain't, all money ain't good money. Is all money good money? I mean, I don't know. I mean, most money's good money.

I don't know about you. She said most money's good money. I mean, I think most money's good money. Here's a thing. I think that it's really important that you're not sacrificing yourself for money. Right. I still think at the end of the day, I'm still Emma from East London. I'm exactly the same person that I was when I was 12 years old.

Yeah, there's no integrity like, bending or? No, because I don't think that you have to. I actually think that you can care about money and care about a lot of other things too. You can do deeply meaningful, impactful work, creative work and be paid for it. And what we've done is we've said like, I'm a creative, I'm in non-profit, I do something so worthy therefore. And I'm like, absolutely not. The two things can exist at the same time. And too often we're giving away our gifts for free before we've even valued ourselves before we've even valued the service, I'm like, there is never a time when it makes sense to give something away for free without a plan. I worked for like a full year

for free, like doing work placements back in the day when you could do that. But it was always with a plan and a goal for what I wanted on the other side. It was always with an aim that I'm going to get a job at one of these places that's going to be my entry point into fashion. So you have to have a plan if you're giving away your services for free. And you have to have a plan as to how you're going to get to the money. That's important. That's important stuff. Yeah, I think there's also, you know, if you're a business person, there's great stuff in here, but also just life. There's just great life lessons in here. Like, you talk about planning your life in your 20s, in your 30s, and in your 40s, you had to plan like, what is my 40s going to be. Absolutely. I love this,

because we just had Jill Scott on the other recently. Do you not love Jill? I die. So Jill was on. We had a great episode with Jill. And she has a theory about 20s, 30s, 40s. It was, Jill said, when you're in your 20s, you work hard. Facts. In your 30s, you work smart. In your 40s, you work how you want. In your 50s, you work when you want. And in your 60s, you work if you want.

Love. Jill's got it down. Right? Like, she has got it so down. It's so good. Literally, like, that is so good because that thing about, like, how you work in your 20s, right? It's like, there's a time and a place. And I think what people don't really understand is that life is so long.

Like even the idea that she's taking us from 20s to 70s, right? It's like there's 50 years in between that. But we really sort of overestimate what you can do in a year and underestimate what you can do in 10. So I like to make these plans for myself because it helps kind of ground me in my decision making. I know what to say no to because I know if it's not taking me closer to one of my goals, I don't need to do it. But I like to, and I set the book up in the beginning, I say, have a vision. for your life. That's not a vision board and it's not manifestation. Okay, so explain though that clearly. Ambition needs to find you working. You cannot think your way or consume your way. I love a

podcast. I have a podcast. But it's like you can't listen to a podcast and think that that's going to get you closer to where you want to go. You got to do the work, right? It's like we have to. You can read 75 self-help books. Doesn't matter. That's not going to help you. You have to help yourself. And so I think when you have a vision for like, what type of person do I want to be? What type a woman do I want to be? What type of caring? What are my values? What are my principles? And then you work out what you want your life to be like based on that. You say like these are the things that are important to me. My family is really important to me. So I'm going to make sure that I've ring fence these moments in the year to do these things because I want those memories. I'm going to

prioritize X, Y and Z in my work life because it's important that I make this money. And and that won't happen unless I get to there. So I think the plan is really about mapping things out and then having a path and where you're going to work towards it. You ain't going to a vision board it. It's also helpful too so that you don't waste your time doing things that don't serve you, right? Like that's part of that. We've all had years like that.

We've all had years where we get lost and we get taken on someone else's agenda. And that's what I don't want for women. You said you were talking in here about how women especially, we care so. much about other people's things. Like, is somebody underpaid? Is somebody working too hard? Is somebody like you... And your kids? Is what's happening? You worry about everyone else. But yourself. Yes. You're last on your list. And I actually want to make sure that we are like right at the top of our list of priorities. And as a mother of four, I think people get very put off by that idea of me saying, you know, I put myself first. I start with myself. But when I'm good,

everyone's going around me. They can't wait to pull you like... There's two golden rules. that any man should live by. Rule one, never mess with a country girl. You play stupid games, you get stupid prizes. And rule two, never mess with her friends either. We always say that trust your girlfriends. I'm Anna Sinfield, and in this new season of the girlfriends... Oh my God, this is the same man.

A group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist. I felt like I got hit by a truck. I thought, how could this happen to me? The cops didn't seem to care. So they take matters into their own hands. I said, oh, hell no. I vowed I will be his last target. He's going to get what he deserves.

Listen to the girlfriends. Trust me, babe. On the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. What's up, everyone? I'm Ego Wode. My next guest, you know from Step Brothers Anchorman, Saturday Night Live, and The Big Money Play. Layers Network. It's Will Ferrell.

Woo, woo, woo, woo. My dad gave me the best advice ever. I went and had lunch with them one day, and I was like, and dad, I think I want to really give this a shot. I don't know what that means, but I just know the groundlings. I'm working my way up through, and I know it's a place that come, look for up and coming talent. He said, if it was based solely on talent, I wouldn't worry about you, which is really sweet. Yeah. He goes, but there's so much luck involved.

And he's like, just give it a shot. He goes, but if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit. If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration. It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat. Just hang in there. Yeah, it would not be. Right, it wouldn't be that. There's a lot of luck.

Listen to Thanks Dad on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. In 2023, former bachelor star Clayton Eckerd found himself at the center of a paternity scandal. The family court hearings that followed revealed glaring inconsistencies in her story. This began a years-long court battle to prove the truth. You doctored this particular test twice in someone's, correct? I doctored the test once. It took an army of internet detectives to crack the case.

I wanted people to be able to see what their tax dollars were being used for. Sunlight's the greatest disinfected. They would uncover a distinctions. disturbing pattern. Two more men who'd been through the same thing. Greg, the lesbian, Michael Maranini. My mind was blown. I'm Stephanie Young. This is Love Trap. Laura, Scottsdale Police.

As the season continues, Laura Owens finally faces consequences. Ladies and gentlemen, breaking news at Americopa County as Laura Owens has been indicted on fraud charges. This isn't over until justice is served in Arizona. Listen to a love-trapped podcast on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. In New York, Lorena Borja was the protector of Latinas that have learned to to survive three times. As women trans, like immigrants, and as a worker sexual. I'm going to get to where I have to get, like a perr.

Pelear with garras and unias. But when she died, Nobody will be able to fill the satas the woman Laurenna Borges I'm

I'm gonna and I'm invite to a world feroce and brilliant where women

three-marchinadas liberate a quarter battle not only to survive after the murder

but to prosperer in a world in a world of menaces and tachosuelas and if

it's a Fault a shot of tequila Listen Central the Reinas as part

of My Culture Podcast Network in the app of AHeard Radio, Apple Podcasts or where see you

your podcasts You know like Miranda Miranda I'll take it I'm like Miranda's I'm just

saying they can't wait to do that to successful women every time we're held to very

different standards than successful men right because we have to be you know

nurturing and empathetic and a baller and look good and an incredible wife and and and it's like that's impossible that's why I wrote this book that's where women are exhausted that's why we're exhausted that I want to say like there's a trade-off yeah there is a way to do this you know I feel like Oprah said it best she said you can have it all but not all at the same time which is really true but I want women to choose I don't want us to be kind of taken on a journey and I think that this book is going to teach people how you get the choice but also

you've chosen well in a partner. Oh, God damn, yes. Who's helped you? You talk about like the importance of you don't want a business partner that you don't share responsibilities with equally and you don't want a marriage also where your partner is not sharing. I think who you choose to spend your life with, your private life is probably the most important business decision you'll ever make because they're either going to add to you or they're going to really take away. And if you don't have someone who's in support of the greater vision of you and yourself,

like you are in trouble. Like you're in so much trouble. Did you know that going into marriage? Yeah, you know what? I knew that, I mean, my husband's Swedish, right? Like, Swedish society is very interesting. It's very matriarchal society. So there's this kind of balance from the get-go.

But I also never assumed that I would be the lead parent and have to teach him stuff. You know, it's like, I'm going to teach him how to change a diaper and make a sandwich. Like, no. Like he's going to figure that stuff out. But I'm also not going to micromanage my husband. I don't think that's my job. And, you know, I really believe that I have a life and he has a life and we have this incredible life together. But I wasn't going to sacrifice the things that I wanted.

And I was lucky that I had a husband who is unbelievably supportive. I just think for women who are looking for that partner, if you have to be conscious of that as you're looking for the partner. Like, did you stumble into that? And then maybe I attract that. Oh, you attracted that. I think that I attract that because that's the only type of partner I've ever had. Like I don't, I think that, you know, in that early process, like, you know, people show you. They tell you who they are.

They tell you how they're going to be. You see how they move. You never went through like a young, there was never a young Emma who was making bad decisions in men. Or a night, maybe, but not longer. No longer. I made stupid decisions like in a moment and I realized in the morning that that was not for me. I was like, oh, you know, I, um, yeah, like I would never like into bad boys or any. No. Not a chance. You know, I don't have the disposition for it. You let me down. I am out. I'm gone. I just, do you know what I mean? I've such a, and it isn't even about like high self-worth. It's just like low tolerance. Like I have zero tolerance for someone who's going to mess me around. Like, I just, you know what? Miss a phone call, I'm like, bye. Like, no. Do you know what I mean?

Because I never believed that. Oh, I see. Oh, they'll get better. Like, things are going to change. I'm like, they don't. It won't. Move on. And also, they were like so many boys when I was little, you know.

Oh, you're out here. Oh, here. You're smart. You know, I was like, come on. Fashionable. He'll just move on and try something else. You never went through, let me fix somebody or any of that type of thing. Never.

Really. Never. Yeah. But there's not to say I didn't have like some not so great boyfriends that were like, you know, messing around. and doing whatever that they were doing. But not with me knowing and not with me tolerating anything. Do you know what I mean?

It's like, that's just not. Yeah, so it wasn't so much that you were looking for this type of partner. It's that your behavior warranted and you found somebody because you were moving around that way. I think so. And I think I have really high standards, not just with everyone around me, right? It's like my entire team, I have high standards. But also, I give a lot.

And I think when you're a person who gives a person who gives a. lot and has high expectations, like that comes back to you. And so as soon as I get a signal, it's like anything, right? If I get a signal that something's off, that I'm not getting equal back, it's like, I'm gone. That's the East London in me, though, you know? That's like, where I come from, you don't suffer fools. Like, you are expected to tell the truth, to do what you say you're going to do, to be true to your word and suffer the consequences if you don't. So it's like, I don't have time for foolishness. Plus, you are a woman on a mission. I'm on a mission.

I have a time. Like literally, like, I don't have the energy. Like, I would lose my, I would lose it. Yeah. Lose it. There's a, there's a, I don't even need my cards because it goes naturally. What were you just talking about? About being angry.

I know where you were going. No, no, no, it wasn't. Oh, about the anger, anger issues. But after you talked about that, I love that you identified your own anger issues and then went and then got help for your anger issues. Like, nothing terrible happened. Nobody had to intervene. When I first heard that you went to anger therapy, anger management, I was like, oh, God, something must have.

She must have been arrested or something. No, she had an incident on the train and she was like, oh, God, I'm so angry. And then went and fixed it yourself. Like, you identified the problem within yourself and went and worked on it. Yeah, because I knew that that wasn't matching up to the life that I wanted. I wouldn't be able to take me, my little angry, crazy girl's self and do the things that I wanted to do. And that was so clear to me. I was like, this is not going to roll.

They're not going to work in a workplace. So you worked on that. You got a hold of that, manage that. And I still work on that every day. Really? Yes. And I still sometimes lose it because I can go eyes with people. And they're just like, you know, it's something that you have to work on every single day.

Like in the same way that I work on being really sad sometimes. But what is the ink? What is that? What is that? I think that is like I'm hardwired like that. I am not, you know, I think it's so much a fact. of my upbringing, you know, I wasn't taught to be thoughtful. We certainly weren't, I wasn't ever taught that you could like take a breath and move past something. I was always taught that if

something happened to you, because someone was disrespecting you, someone was like, you were going to look after yourself and you were going to lash out. And that just becomes like a pattern, like a loop in your system. And it wires and wires and it gets more and more attuned unless you deal with it. And so I think that that is very much who I am. and I have to work all the time and make sure that I keep myself, like my head above border, keep practicing, keep training.

I wondered if it was hard or if sometimes it could be triggered by because I know a lot of amazing, super high-functioning women, right? And there is an impatience. Like, the women that I know that I run big companies and stuff, they're all kind of impatient. Yeah, I'm definitely impatient.

And so I can see that, triggering anger. Almost anger. Here's my thing. I've worked every single one of the jobs, right? So it's like I have an understanding for what it takes to pack the boxes, to do the assistant job, to work your way up the ranks, to be a, like, you know, mid-level executive.

I did all the things. And so, you like, you know, can you, do you swear on this show? Yes, please, but the love of God. Did you see how we started our day today with our TikTok? I do. But you're like, you know, in England they say you can't fuck a fucker. Like, I am a person who understand. So if you come to me with an excuse, if you come to me telling me it's going to take three hours and I can do it in 45 minutes, I'm like, I have been there.

I did that thing. So then I have an impatience, but I'm not going to get angry about that. I feel like the things that I get angry about are when I feel like people don't care because I care the most. I care about everything. I care about the glass, the tablecloth, the thing that, like, I'm, you know, it's like that's how I come into what I do. And so if you show a lack of care, anger, I'm going to take a deep breath. But you won't work with me for very long. I understand too deeply what you're saying, Emma.

I have actually worked on that, right, Britt? I'm better now. I used to be very, it's also you expect people. Beyonce talked about this once, I think it was on her special. Like, she does, would do the rehearsals, and she wouldn't eat, she wouldn't sleep, she wouldn't drink. And then she realized, oh, other people need. to sleep and eat and you expect people to operate how you operate and if you let it frustrate you

because they don't, how can you really be a good leader? Because you can't. You can't. You can't. Also, they don't have the same thing to gain as you. Like, you've got to get real. Yeah. Like, I'm out here doing what I do. Everybody around me is not got the same circumstance and they don't have the same upside. So also, I'm realistic. Yeah. You know, if I'm paying you 200 grand, I expect 200 grand of you, not a million dollars. Like, what are you talking about? So you realize that. You don't have the same to gain as I do. Yeah.

Oh, so with the anger thing, it wasn't so much about the anger management. It was, you said that you were still working on forgiveness. Oh, yes. I'm not a good forgiver. Yeah. I'm not because, you know, it's so funny, I did the Hoffman process. You know what that is? No, tell.

Oh, it's like such an L.A. thing. But it is an incredible process, like a, you know, nine-day intensive therapy process where you learn all your patterns and you're undeferell. your childhood trauma and all the things. This sounds very expensive. It's expensive and it's expensive on your, like it's so hard. Like it's such a deep, deep dig. And I just, you know, it was one of those things where you're kind of expected to come out

for giving everything that's kind of happened to you. And I got to the nine days and everybody's like, yeah. And I was like, nope, but still know. Still no, but that's like, you know, again, about I'm boundaryed, right? It's like, I can understand, you know, if somebody slights me, it's not actually always about me. And I think as far as it comes to, like, childhood trauma, it's like, I can understand it. It doesn't always mean that you need to forgive. Yeah.

You know? But the way you talk about that in here is you're more likely to, instead of forgive somebody, oh, my God, do you know, Joe Scott? Because I feel like there's so many similar things. You should know her. You should introduce me. I would die. And I'm thinking of our interview with her because even in that, even how you explained, we have a clip of her going saying, I'm much more likely to forget you than forgive you.

And you talk about that here. You say, you know, it's not worth your time. It's like your or your patient. So you rather just, I'm not going to forgive you. You just cut you out of the fabric of my life. You know, I always think about this idea of like who, like you operate. on like these orbits. And I have people that are in my inner orbit and I have people that are outer, I'm more out. And it's like, you don't have to like, you know, be out of my life, but you just

might not be one of my like inner circle people, right? So I'm operating on a system that says, like, you just might have to like be a couple out, a couple of steps removed. I don't need to cut people, although I have done that in the past. But to me, it's like, there's just like there's an inner circle, there's an expectation and I'm not going to lower my values. When do you when do you care enough to work on that forgiveness or? With my husband. You know, that's, that's it. Yeah.

That's it. He's the only one. Trying to think about. Everybody else, you know. No. God bless. God bless. That's really funny.

Sorry. Hey, listen. Oh, so you do transcendental meditation too. smart. That's one of the biggest tools that I have. How long have you been doing this? So I think I did a course. That's a great question. I want to say like maybe three years. Okay. And it's one of those things. So I don't, so I don't do, you're supposed to do 20 minutes a day, twice a day. That never, ever happened. But I do do it. I would say I do 20 minutes a day in the morning three or four times a week. And it is a game changer. Because I always thought of meditation as something that turns the noise down.

Really, I actually think it gives you anything. It gives you space and clarity. And so for me, it was one of those things that I was like, wow, this is an insane tool that I never envisaged I would ever use, but it really, really works as something to create some opportunity to slow things down and call the play. Like, that's what I like to do. I've tried this. How did you find it?

This is a specific meditation, too, where you have to say the word. You have a mantra. I was doing it for a little while, like a couple months. And I did notice a difference. And I just fell off the regimen of the day. need to get back on it. And I only got to 10 minutes. Okay, but that's good. I can never get past 10 minutes. But when we've got like, you like this in your head all the time. But they say 20 minutes is when you feel the real effects. The game changer. The 20 is a game changer. You just got to find your

perfect time. And also, I think this again, it's like, yeah, it would be great if you had like 40 minutes every day to do it. I think you just find that 20. And for someone who might be interested. For someone who might be interested. You get a word, a mantra. Yeah. Yep. You say the word. Over and over again. And you meditate on the word. And you meditate on the word. And what does it do for you? How does it, what does it do?

It literally, like, imagine it takes like the temperature down. There's only two things that do this for me. Like when you're, you know, because I'm in a constant conversation with myself. Like, I'm thinking about what is happening over there, what's happening next, what we've got tomorrow, what the kids need, what my husband just spoke to me about, what I'm doing in one company. It's like, like, my brain is like this all the time. It literally is like it's almost like everything just comes down to this like very quiet place

and you end up having space and in the space comes something. Like literally like it's almost like a little gift like something will come in and you're like, oh, I did not see that. And it becomes clearer. You figure out what you need to do. I come out with so much energy, like so much clarity. It's crazy. It's so, it really is to me, like, you know when people say, it's a game changer.

It's like, no, it will change your game. It will change the way that you move. I'm motivated, Emma, I'm going to do it. You're going back. I'm going back. I'm going back in. It's really, I'm feeling a five minutes, right? You got to five.

train your ways, especially when you get to a certain age. It's hard to stop telling yourself the stories, but you have to make sure that what's happening in your own head is not, like, bad for you, right? That your biggest enemy isn't living in your own mind. And so I really try to make the things that I do, like I have a big positive impact on me. And that Transcendental is one of those things. What is the, what is something that you've had to unlearn recently about yourself? I think honestly that I wasn't going to be capable of writing. You know, I'm dyslexic, highly, highly dyslexic. And so I fixed my work and my life around almost never writing anything down, you know, like never. I speak every email on my phone. I speak every text in. I never, you know, when in your adult life do you write, like in that type of way? And so I thought a book would be impossible for me. The other thing is like I wrote the book, totally back to front. I started with all the things that were easy to me, building a business, making the career of your dreams, leadership, money, like bomb, bomb, roll it, like chow,

chow, chow, spoke it all into the phone. And then I was like, well, why can I do that stuff? And then I got to the managing emotions. Then I got to the vision part. But it was very, very hard for me to organise my thoughts. And once I had it together, there was this sense of achievement. Like I was like, wow, but that took a lot of doing because I was constantly telling myself, telling my agent telling everyone around me. I'll never do a book. I'll never do that. I can't, I literally can't do that. That's not for me. Turned out. I'm so surprised that you would say that those kind of things to yourself. Yeah, because you know, when you're a person of certainty, you know, I should know better, but when you're a person of certainty, like, you're certain about a lot of

things, you're certain about what you can do. You're so certain about what you can't do. And I'm like, that's not for me. Like, you know, I can look at an outfit and be like, that's not for me. Yeah, yeah. My body doesn't work that way. I can't wear that. And I'm like, oh, that's kind of I wore that. I wore that shit. We have a voice note. Should we go to voice note now? Hey guys, you ever sign up for a phone plan thinking, wow, what a great price? And then a few months later, it's like, surprise, your bill is higher. We hate that.

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We always say that trust your girlfriends. I'm Anna Sinfield, and in this new season of the girlfriends, Oh my God, this is the same man. A group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist. I felt like I got hit by a truck. I thought, how could this happen to me? The cops didn't seem to care. So they take matters into their own hands.

I said, oh, hell no. I vowed I will be his last target. He's going to get what he deserves. Listen to the girlfriends. Trust me, babe. On the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. What's up, everyone?

I'm Ego Wodom. My next guest, you know from Stepbrothers Anchorman, Saturday Night Live and the Big Money Players Network, It's Will Ferrell My dad gave me the best advice ever I went and had lunch with him one day And I was like And dad I think I want to really give this a shot

I don't know what that means But I just know the groundlings I'm working my way up through And I know it's a place that come Look for up and coming talent He said if it was based solely on talent I wouldn't worry about you Which is really sweet

Yeah He goes but there's so much luck involved And he's like Just give it a shot He goes but if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit. If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration. It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat, just hang in there. Yeah, it would not be. Right. It wouldn't be

that. There's a lot of luck. Yeah. Listen to thanks dad on the IHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. In 2023, former Bachelor star, Clayton, Leighton Eckerd found himself at the center of a paternity scandal. The family court hearings that followed revealed glaring inconsistencies in her story. This began a years-long court battle to prove the truth. You doctored this particular test twice in someone, correct? I doctored the test once. It took an army of internet detectives to crack the case.

I wanted people to be able to see what their tax dollars were being used for. Sunlight's the greatest disinfected. They would uncover a disturbing pattern. Two more men who'd been through the same thing. Gregalespian and Michael Marincini. My mind was blown. I'm Stephanie Young. This is Love Trap.

Laura, Scottsdale Police. As the season continues, Laura Owens finally faces consequences. Ladies and gentlemen, breaking news at Maricopa County as Laura Owens has been indicted on fraud charges. This isn't over until justice is served in Arizona. Listen to Love Trapped podcast on the IHeartRour. radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. In New York, Lorraine Borjas was the protector of Latinas that have

learned to survive three times. Like women trans, like immigrants, and as a personer sexual. I'm going to get to where I have to get like a perr, to play with garras and unias. But when she

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as part of MyCultura Podcast Network. In the app of I Heart Radio, Apple Podcasts, or where we have a segment, it is called, it's a voice note segment. So this is a fan or listener of the pod, knows you're going to be here, has a question or a comment. We're going to play that. Hi, my name is Tanisha.

I'm 30, and I've been having a hard time getting credit for the ideas that I actually present. How do I get compensated for something like that? Because obviously I have left the organization. I didn't get any compensation or credit for that. idea, but it is an idea that has sustained that program moving forward. So how do you navigate situations like that to avoid being put in that position? I used to suffer from this. I would hold everything in because I'd be afraid somebody was going to rob me. Wow. Terrible. I don't know about

that kind of, I mean, to me, that signals scarcity mindset, but if we talk about what Tunisia is actually saying, she's obviously in an environment where her ideas can be taken because she's being paid to give ideas to do whatever job she's doing and then she's in an environment where those ideas can be taken and used. But it's not, she's not working for herself. She's working for an employer. That means she is being paid and compensated for her ideas. You don't get to get the full value. And I do honestly think that sometimes employees can overestimate their contribution. If you're in a place where you're being paid to do a job, you have to do that job. That job might be giving some of your ideas.

Now, if you are doing something that is beyond the expectation of your remit and you're going above and beyond, you need to go and have a conversation about your additional contribution. But I think that it's kind of naive to think that, you know, you're going to be compensated beyond what you're being paid when you're just giving your idea. Like, do you know what I mean? Yes. There's so much more to business.

It's like there's so much more that. goes into things. And I think sometimes we can have a little bit of a naivety about our contribution. Yeah. Also because can't like a hundred people have the same idea and not everybody can get it across the finish line. So an idea is really just an idea. Well, it's just an idea because it takes a lot of people to execute it, a lot of people to create the things. But again, if this is somebody that feels chronically undervalued and I've been in that same situation, I've been in a place where I thought I was delivering value and I talk about it in the book to a company they were making a lot of money and I didn't feel like I was making enough. But the company were like, Emma,

we pay you for this job. You are paid and we make a lot of money out of it. I was like, okay, I'll take my services elsewhere. And that was the beginning of my first business. But they weren't wrong. I wasn't wrong either. But sometimes we have to know that there's nuance in the situation. You just might have to take your gifts and your services elsewhere to realize the full potential of what you're doing. But you're probably got to be realistic with yourself. Is that like one kind of fluke idea or one kind of limp? You know what I mean? Or do you have many ideas that can expand many business things?

Do you have so many ideas that you could pay yourself what you're being paid currently? And if you don't, like, again, it's never that black and white. In the book, I talk so much about negotiation, right? Negotiation isn't one side winning or losing. You've got to find something mutually advantageous. So go and have a conversation, talk about and understand. but go with specificity. You know, this would be the conversation to me.

I'd be like, Yeah, let's give it. Let's roll play a little. So you guys are paying me $65,000 and I came up with X idea that netted the business X. You're going to know those X's. You're going to have those numbers. Don't come in with Millie. Don't be sad.

Don't be angry. Don't be silly. It's like come in factually, right? I'm paid this. I delivered this. The contribution was this. Once you've got that, you say, you know what I would really. imagine that my contribution in this company is worth 85,000. Oh, we're not ready to pay you that.

Okay, what do I need to do to get from here to here? You show me. How can you value me and my ideas? Because if you're unable to do that, then I would need to move on because I can't see how I would be contributing above this. It's a conversation. You don't need to be stupid about it. You can just advocate for yourself. Let me tell you, half the time, the people that are in charge don't fully understand your contribution. They may not know where the idea comes from. They also might be coming from a place that they see it differently. And that feedback is important for you to have. It's important for you to understand, well, actually, you think we made X, but the costs associated with this, there were five other departments involved. Then you can be like, oh, I got it. Okay, so actually,

this is what it was and this is what I need to do in the future. But still, how do I get to this? And so I think that you can have a really nuanced negotiation. You've got to teach yourself. to have those conversations. It also teaches resilience because when and if you get a knockback, that's not walking out with nothing. That's information. That is like you what you need to come back and do things in a different way. So I just think like when you're when you have ambition, when you want more, which is exactly what she's saying is that I want more. I want more credit. I want more money. I want to be recognized. It's like go and ask for it. You can write into Angie. That's cool. But like make sure you've had a conversation with your boss and the

conversation isn't just happening in your head. You're not just talking to your co-workers that they can't do shit. You need to go to the people that can actually help change and in a nuanced way express exactly what you need and what your expectations are. You might get it. Are you ever you said in here that if you never hear the word no, you're not pushing enough, right? Absolutely. But are you ever like, because sometimes I'll be in, I'm always like, I'm like too fair. So I'm like, okay, they want me to do that for them. I don't do it for this much. This is me talking to you. I would say less than your wife, less than you think you were. Probably sometimes. Yes. Yes. Oof. Yes. What is that? That's terrible. I'm getting better at it.

Okay. I'm getting better at it. What's the reason though? Why are you doing that? Like doing a favor? Are you scared? What is it? I'm like chronically obsessed with being fair. Oh, fair to who? Yes, right. Fair to everybody else. What I think the value might be to them or kind of taking all of their things into consideration instead of putting my thing at the center of start with yourself, starting with myself. Rate the book, Angie. I did read the book.

It's so good. It's so good. No, but I understand that. Have you never, do you never have? Do you ever say, okay, our business is valued at $100 million, but I'm going to go ask for $150 million, whatever the thing is. Whatever than I'm just making a number up of something.

Do you ever feel like, oh, what, that was big? I went big. Oh, like, and feel like almost crazy about it? All the time, but that is something that comes like, again, with experience and a willingness to walk away from the thing. Because when we make deals, right, when we decide, like, I'm going to give it over here, again, it's kind of a signal that we don't think there's something better on the other side or that, like, what, you're willing to undervalue yourself? Like, for what reason? I always imagine that if somebody is offering me something, the chances are someone else will offer the same thing. So it's not that I don't ever do that. It's just that experiences taught me to know better. Like if somebody is willing to give you something, someone else will give it to you.

In that same way when I was like so young that my boss wouldn't take me from what I was on 25,000 pounds. I think I asked for 30,000. I was like, someone else will pay me 25. are we better be over there because I can manage the trajectory. So I think that, again, these things are chronic because this is just an old thought that lives in your head. You are undervaluing your services. You come from a place because you're sitting here maybe with a scarcity mindset that says, you know, if I get X, somebody else gets less, it's like, why? It's not a zero-sum game, right? That's not have guys with everything.

It doesn't mean because, like, you know, someone gets something. over here that somebody else suffers. And I don't think, to the contrary, I don't think it's about overvaluing yourself. I don't think that you should be like, it's a million dollars. You have to educate yourself. You have to know the space. You have to find a place that actually makes sense. But the idea of like undervaluing my services. You want to throw up right now. You want to do. I want to get, I want to get angry. We're working on your anger, Emma. You've come so far. a deep breath when you said it. I was like,

I know. I've gotten you, Angie. I have gotten way better. But it was me young. I felt, you know, I started doing radio. I was 18, 19. I was grateful to be there. I was at this, you know, and so I just was happy to have the opportunity. Yeah, but like you don't, you know, I didn't, it took me a long time. But now you're Angie. And we all have that journey. And if you stay with the stories, like this, like that stuff will just keep you small. more. Like, I think that you have to like, again, it's like replacing the thought. It's like you've got all

of this stuff that you've been doing for so long. You have this body of work. You have these ways that you behave, the ways that you do business. But nothing changes unless it changes. But you have to do that. Like when I say start with yourself, I really mean to go back inside yourself and go, what is it that actually makes me undervalue myself? What is it that makes it that make me undervalue myself? What is it that makes me do that smaller number than I know I'm worth. Kindness, that you don't want to be seen as a bitch. You don't want to be seen as someone who's taking advantage. Are you asking me the question?

Yeah. Yeah, probably me wanting to, yeah, like I said, be fair, not take advantage of people. I don't know, yeah, maybe wanting to be. And it's so interesting because in you being fair and not wanting to take advantage, you're allowing somebody else to be unfair and take advantage. I know. So what makes them better than you? you. No, no, no, we're on the other side of this, okay? We're, and we're already like on the

other side. I know, so interesting, right? It's so interesting. It's so interesting. It's so interesting. It's to this big age that it would take me to this long. But I talk through it because I think for anybody listening to this, it's chronic, it's patterned, it's ingrained. It's not stuff that knowingly and flippantly, because I reckon anyone who listens to this podcast is that, I'll undervalue myself. I know what I'm worth. I make my money. It's like, ah, but do you? Like, do you every time because sometimes we do things unconsciously. And that's why I wrote this book in the way that I did. Because when you understand what you're doing, when you understand what's running through your thoughts and the reasons and the ways you make decisions, then you can push against

it. But it's not until it's raised to your attention that you understand some of this stuff. Because some of it is like, it's not even you. It's the culture. Women are undervalued. Yeah. Right. It's somebody else with the same resume and the same, you know, set of circumstances, we put them side by side, and we see this with AI, right? You upload the two same resumes, and John gets paid more than Sally. Like, what the fuck? Like, what is happening? I can't believe in 2020.

But it's true. But it's true. And so I think that there's plenty of things in society that are already entrenched, that already make us, like, small and not progress. You can't be one of those things for yourself. Smart with yourself. It's so good at me. It's so good.

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Did they get you a little bit, though? Did they start making you feel? No. No, I expected it. I anticipated it. very used to the differences in the way moms are treated versus dads the way women are treated versus men. Yeah. I did it purposefully because I want to give permission, permission for other women to just be honest and true for. I'm like, fuck them. Okay, Emma. If God were to text you

right now, what would it say? Are you religious person? Are you a spiritual? I'm a very spiritual person. Okay. Not particularly religious. If God was to text me, you know, my favorite thing to be told ever is when people say to you, God bless. Every taxi driver in the whole of England says that to you all the time. But when someone says it to me, I actually feel like blessed, like I'm blessed for the day. Just that simple. God bless. So God would say to you. God would say to me God bless. God blesses you. Like for real. Like you've got the real anointed, like it's coming from him in real life. Because I imagine that every day, like I feel like it's the best thing to be told. Like, you know, it's like you are blessed. are, you know, what do you say? Like in America, they say you're blessed and highly favored. I always

loved it when I heard that because I was like, I never heard that before in my life in England, but I feel like that so much. You're blessed and highly favored. It's like a beautiful thing. It's amazing. It's amazing women in my life will say that to. And again, I've never ever heard that. That was like black women would say that to me. Like, and I just thought is incredible. Blessed and highly favored. Yeah. I love that. Is it beautiful? It's beautiful. When you break down the words. Now we say it's so flippantly,

but it's like blessed and highly favored. That's insane. Well, thank you for today. And thank you for this beautiful book. And God bless. I'm going to go and spend more time with this book because clearly I need to start with myself. You're doing all right.

Thanks. Everyone, start with yourself. Emma Green and relaxed. Well, thank you so, so much. Hey guys, thanks for watching. Make sure you subscribe, like, comments, and check out all of the other episodes we have on Angel Martinez, IRO podcast. In 2023, Bachelor star Clayton Eckerd was accused of fathering twins. But the pregnancy appeared to be a hoax.

You doctored this particular test twice, Ms. Ellen's, correct? I doctored the test once. It took an army of internet detectives to uncover a disturbing pattern. Two more men who'd been through the same thing. Greg Gillespie and Michael Marantini. My mind was blown. I'm Stephanie Young. This is Love Trapped.

Laura, Scottsdale Police. As the season continues, Laura Owens finally faces consequences. Listen to Love Trapped podcast on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. When a group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist, they take matters into their own hands. I vowed. I will be his last. target. He is not going to get away with this. He's going to get what he deserves. We always say that trust your girlfriends. Listen to the girlfriends. Trust me, babe, babe, on the IHartRadio

app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What's up, everyone? I'm Ego Wadom. My next guest, it's Will Ferrell. My dad gave me the best advice ever. He goes, just give it a shot. But if you ever, reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit. If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration. It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat, just hang in there. Yeah, it would not be. Right, it wouldn't be that. There's a lot of luck. Yeah. Listen to Thanks Dad on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. In New York, Lorena Borjas, protectia latinas that have learned to survive three

times. As women trans, as immigrants, and as women are sexual. I'm going to

get to get to get like a perr, to bele with garras and u-Nas. But when

he was, he was a fourth battle to prosper in a world of a

world at the IHeard Radio, Apple Podcasts or where you see your

podcasts. This is an IHeart podcast. Guarante Human Thank you.